Sunday Papers - Sunday Papers w/ Greg and Mike Ep 173 7/16/23

Episode Date: July 16, 2023

Phone call with Chaos another Tom O’Neill about the release of a Manson girl. The actors join the writers on the strike line and somebody farts at an RFK event. Larry Nassar gets stabbed and Italy decides it’s OK to grope, as long as it only lasts 10 seconds.

uh got it and then uh uh are you to clap it in 7, 8, 9 and then I'm going to do a check 3, 2, 1 that was good read all about it read all about it extra coming in from Nashville

Tennessee and Los Angeles California we got the Sunday papers Mike is going to be right with you it's like we surprised you that we were California. We got the Sunday Papers. Mike is going to be right with you. It's like we surprised you that we were going to do a podcast today. To me, you're a little frustrated. We're starting late. We covered a lot of information. Here

come Mike. But look, I traveled down to the South. There we go. We got very personal. We got into some personal stuff. I think it was like a therapy session before the podcast, which I think is always good. Then we got into some personal stuff i think it was like a therapy session before the podcast which i think is always good then we got to hear about your room swimming we're going to hear about your oh my god well you gave me you said look neil young is playing at the greek first of all oh we're getting right into it are we not going to deep tease the rest of the the deep tease no i want to get into it you told me me to go see Neil Young at the Greek.

I have never been to the Greek theater. Let me tell you something. I will go see anything at that theater. It is gorgeous. It's unbelievable. It's intimate. It's nestled in the hills of Griffith Park. You hear coyotes in the background.

And it's like the parking is totally manageable it's not like the hollywood bowl at all it's the it's one of the best venues and then the john ford theater which is up by the hollywood bowl which hurts it is even smaller and it's another outdoor place so i get there and i take a handful of shrooms and i've had i've had a long day. And I broke the two rules about taking hallucinogens, which is set and setting. You're supposed to have a mindset that's good, like meditate, fucking sit in a hot tub, take a hike before you do it. I instead did three podcasts that day and drove through Hollywood traffic at six o'clock to get to the concert. So I'm a little frazzled. I'm feeling very like tight. And so that was a signal. And the second one is if you go to a concert, take one gram. That's it. You just want a little buzzy high.

You don't take two grams because we sat down and uh neil young comes out and it's just so fucking it's like you're in his living room and he's just crazy for a party he's playing exactly the music he wants to play he's not pandering i mean later on in the show he gets to some hits but for the most part you know he's playing songs that I haven't heard before that I am hanging on every word of. Yep. And then these three guys show up and they sit next to me and they are like six foot three. They are young. They're drunk out of their minds.

And you know, the theater, this is a 77 year old man with an acoustic guitar. You can hear a pin drop in the theater. This is a 77-year-old man with an acoustic guitar. You can hear a pin drop in this theater. And these guys are talking to each other like they're at a Van Halen concert. And everybody around them is turning around. They're shushing them. And then you know me. You know me.

I do, unfortunately. I have to go, hey, guys, keep it down. You're ruining the concert for everybody. And then the guy fucking squares off on me. And huge dude. And he's like, I'm not going to stop talking. I go, well, you're ruining the concert for everybody else. He goes, I'm having a good time.

And then they started acting up even more. And they're smoking joints. And they go on a couple beer runs. And, you know, yelling out to Neil, yelling, yeah, Neil, like the whole, and, and, and now I'm tripping and like, when you're on mushrooms, you're absorbing the energy around you. And, and now, and I'm already, I'm a codependent person. I'm more upset about the people around me having their night ruined than I am even about my own night being ruined because there are a bunch, there are gentle, lovely people trying to listen to Neil Young and they,

their night is being ruined by these. And they represented to me all the aggro testosterone bully energy that I've seen in my life. And it made me feel, uh, like I couldn't do anything. Yeah. Yeah. That were you there with Pete?

Yeah, I was there with Pete and then, uh, Matt Knudson we ran into and he sat us. And then Pete had two other friends. I'm surprised Knudsen couldn't talk those guys out of being dickhead bros. I know. I know. Knudsen's one of the most positive people on the planet.

He was on the other side away from them. So eventually I just got up and I went back about 15 rows and I found another seat. And I enjoyed the last quarter of the concert. Did you have to leave during the last song? No, no, I stayed for that last song. That was amazing. Yeah. And did he tell the story that he was transfixed by a jukebox when he was a boy? No. He was transfixed by a jukebox when he was a boy. Now that song was. So what he told us, because I know he tells different stories every show. So I saw him on.

I made you guys go. I saw him, I think, on Monday night. It was Monday night. And I was I thought it would be great. I was blown away. So this is Neil Young. He's doing deep cuts. And he, did he tell you, did he come up with a metaphor? Like, it's like these songs have been in one of the rooms in my house and other songs of mine have gotten so much attention, but these are in a really nice room.

Like, you know, the, with the velvet furniture and wallpaper and they're really good. And, and I'm glad I remember to go into this room. Like he told this really cool story. That's awesome. Yeah. And that's how we've used these songs. And it has one of my favorite young songs of all time, which is on the way home. And anyway, it's, it was, I couldn't believe there was, there was like, oh, well, that's a beer. Like before I went, I looked at the track list. I'm like, and I, then I would listen to the song. I'm like, oh, well, that's a beer run song. Or that's a bathroom break song. Like I'm that, that song is not really doing anything for me, but just like you said, you were hanging on every word. And it's amazing to me how I didn't realize like

heart, the word heart and the concept is such a focal point of his whole career. And it's obviously heart of gold and all that stuff. But my heart was another song he played that night but it was basically a night full of love songs and and it just came at the right time and so a guy I won't mention that we went with was two funny stories about this um was uh was on ecstasy and when we got to the car after he was so blown away by the concert and he had never seen him before he goes it was like he was every song he sang it was like he was singing it through my heart and i was on nothing because i was the driver that night and i felt the exact same way wow and then the other funny thing the other funny thing he said was we were just talking about the whole concert and everything we talked

about when he did ohio and then like but like too long after we talked about Ohio, he all of a sudden just out of the backseat of the car when we're driving home goes, uh, fucking Nixon. And that became a running joke. And the next day someone goes, they messed up my, they messed up my order, my breakfast order at McDonald's this morning. And I just said, fucking Nixon. And guess what it works i felt relief it's you can just use that phrase now no matter what just fucking nixon that's like ironically he's the guy who launched the war on drugs fucking yeah right yeah but i i do want uh i don't know if he did this with you but so at one point he goes from instrument to instrument, right? It's amazing.

And he's so old, dude. Wasn't that surprising? Yeah, he's really old. Like he has to hold the rail, like to walk up to his organ, which is like, you know, two steps up on a different platform. And I mean, he's going to be 78 this fall, I think. Anyway, at one point he picks up the big white Gretsch guitar, which he's had his whole life. You see it in videos and all that.

And he's just tweaking it. And I don't know if he did this intro for you, but holy shit. He goes, we've got some, you know, he's just mumbling. He's like, we've got some history. And he goes, a lot of things happen. Numbers changed. Four used to be a lot. Now it's just a fraction.

And then the opening notes of Ohio. Ah. Which is insane for those who don't know. It's this summer I hear the drumming, four dead in Ohio. Kent State, right? Kent State. He's talking about a time where when four students were killed, it's like, what if you knew her and found her dead on the ground?

How can you run when you know? It stopped the fucking world. The biggest band in the country wrote a song about it within three days. Yeah. It was intolerable that students had been killed on a campus. It changed the course of the war. It had a huge impact on withdrawing from Vietnam. So I thought that was no less than profound, that introduction.

That introduction's insane to me. Wow. Yeah. Yeah, it was, it should have been a better night but uh and it was lost i felt like it was such a lost opportunity it's just amazing that you know a couple of fucking assholes can ruin something that's so special for so many people you know i can't believe your whole section didn't have them because as you said i mean this theater and let's face it. I mean,

it's not only old people. A lot of young people were there also, but everyone got the vibe. Everyone got, this is an intimate, he had a fireplace on stage. Yeah. Right.

This was him in his den, as you kind of said, like, yeah. Why are you fucking broing out it's the absolute wrong vibe right so uh so last night i was at the uh i was at the comedy store and uh i did three i was at the the improv first then i went to the laugh factory and then i got to the store so i was feeling like on a roll.

By the third show, you're really feeling loose and confident, and I'm about to go on. And then I'm walking into the showroom to go on stage, and I literally bump into a guy, and I go, oh, sorry. And he turns around, it's Quentin Tarantino walking into my show. And I was so aware that he was in the crowd the whole time. Yeah. And I just fucking crushed.

I just like, I pulled out some classics. I'm not going to lie to you. The first half of the set was like all new stuff. And then the second half I was like, all right, I'm going to close this one strong. And then I just left. You're talking about girls' feet? You both have an obsession with that. Oh, right.

Afterwards I was going to tell him I knew Billy Clark, but I didn't. I just left. Oh, you should totally. He loves Billy. I know. Speaking of Billy, Billy's roommate in college, the great John Sorelli, I texted him this funny reel that I saw today. And he goes back, so you and Fitzy using non-union labor on the podcast, you bunch of scabs? That's a tricky question right now because I had a guest for Monday cancel on me because he's an actor who's on a big show.

And he said, we're not allowed to talk about our projects because they consider that promoting shows that we are striking against. So I don't know what it's going to be like. I'm going to have to just have stand-up comics on that have nothing going on in their lives. Is Todd Barry around? I saw a funny tweet. I forget maybe, Oh, I think it might've been this guy, John Viner, who's great. He works on family guy. And he's like, uh, is it a good sign that our leader in all this is named Fran? Because Fran Drescher, the nanny, is the head of the Screen Actors Guild. And she's the face on all of this and is the actor's leader, I should say. And unfortunately, the voice, the voice of this movement, literally. movement Sadly she's also the voice of it Exactly

But anyway if people aren't following this The Actors Guild has joined The Writers Guild Do we have that as a story later? Yeah we do Okay so we'll get to that Little tease Yeah let's deep tease this

What else are we talking about today? We're going to talk about the Actors Strike We're going to talk about the actor's strike. We're going to talk about the Charles Manson family member who just was released from prison. We're going to have a phone call with Tom O'Neill, author of Chaos. That's right.

Which is a book about the Manson murders. We're going to talk about an argument at RFK Jr. at a fundraiser at his house or whatever it was, Chicago tornadoes, the pill, the pill is now over the counter. Uh,

yeah. Florida, Australia. Oh, former gymnastics. That's a good story. The pervert in prison, he got stabbed.

I also finished out. I, uh, I did a non union game shows are not union and they're not writers guild they're not actors union so i finished last week uh taping 21 episodes of this game show for the game show network and um it was and so i didn't know i went into production i thought you were still doing like the sizzle Or like a test show No no no it's not my show

They cast me on another show at the network Oh Nice Yeah it was fun I did it with Caroline Ray We did a bunch of episodes together You know Caroline Ray right So she was a riot And we had side bets going

During the game show. So I won money off all the contestants. Because there was one comedian on each team. Sarah Tiana, I played against her a bunch of times. Yep. Yeah, it was a riot. And just, you know, we'll see how it comes out. But Mario Lopez was the host.

Wow. He doesn't miss a beat that guy nails it oh wow oh good he's like the perfect broadcaster well yeah he's day in day out and he has a radio show too radio guys as you know radio guys can fill

yep we want to thank Rob Moore for the logo this week I don't know why you got to be the fonts I'm fucking Richie. I guess I look like Richie. Look at me as the Fonz. Look at that hair. Look at that.

You may want to send that to the girlfriend. Let her know what it could have been like. Exactly. Song from Lawrence Tarpey, who's a big contributor to the show. Thank you, Lawrence. Great song. Yeah, very cool. And don't forget, people's a big contributor to the show. Thank you, Lawrence. Great song. Yeah, very cool.

And don't forget, people, at the end of the podcast, you can hear some of these songs are longer than the 20-second clip that you hear, and you can listen to the whole song at the end. We got corrections coming in. Oh, boy. Uh-oh. Steve Grosso said, in this Sunday's episode, on your weekly rant of how much Dagwood Bumstead is a pathetic douche,

you made reference to double D batteries. However, there is no such thing as a double D battery. I wish they were, though. It would make my RC car go faster. Blondie lives in an animated world. Blondie lives in an animated world and the dildo that she needs because she's married to such a dildo would be three double D batteries

in a tube with a fleshy top on it that helps her get through her miserable life I think Blondie is your double D battery she is that's what I'm saying there this is from john heyburn hi greg i think you've been saying a few tour dates incorrectly on the pods should be soul joels on july 20th and uncle vinnie is on the 21st of the 22nd you've been off by one date so i looked at their website, and he is correct. I have been giving out the wrong tour date.

Soul Joe's on July 20th. That's the correct date. I was saying the 21st. That's fucking Rich Voss. So I really apologize from the bottom of my heart if I'm sending you to see that fucking guy do stand-up comedy. He should send you a nice edible arrangement and thank you. I know, he should. No, I love Rich.

Rich and I play golf together a lot. And I think we ought to actually play when I'm down there. Here's the thing is I am absolutely convinced I'm going to die of dementia and probably early. My grandmother got in her 50s and died. And so I think I, we just have to have an agreement. We keep doing the podcast and we don't tell the person who starts to slip off with dementia and that becomes, I think it'll become the most popular podcast. Have you heard the podcast with the two guys and one guy is slipping into dementia, but the other guy doesn't mention it at all?

What's the podcast called? Demented. Yeah. I think we're halfway there, Mike. The Sunday paper. We can't even remember what day it is. Yeah. All right.

So I'll see you at Souljoes and Pottstown PA this week, July 20th. Point Pleasant, Uncle Vinny's, July 21st and 22nd. Let's talk about B. Bixle wrote a note to me. He said, just got back from seeing Dead & Company in George, Washington. Oh, that's a town. Oh, maybe it's Gorge, Washington? Me and three friends all used Code Papers. Tickets were $100 cheaper on Game Time.

Look at that. And also, Chris Denman, our producer, just used it, and he saved a lot of money on his tickets. And I'm not even joking. Do you know what I use Game Time for now? So I'm in Nashville. So I go to Game Time, and this is not one of the talking points, and you'll be able to tell because it's so weird.

But I wanted to see what was going on in town, and I wanted to see if there were any good comedy shows, music, sports. I went to GameTime and used it that way. I put in my city, and it shows you everything that's going on. Right. That's a good point. I put in my city, and it shows you everything that's going on. Right. That's a good point. I'm looking at mine right now. And Dodgers, and I'm a big Dodgers fan, and there's games coming up that I want to take.

I'm taking, oh, no, a baseball game. It's so long. And now I can get a good deal. Look, it's fast and easy. Just don't shroom. Just don't overload on shrooms when you go with them because you're going to sit next to a lot of bros at the Dodger game. And I will be

able to see balls and strikes from our shitty seats in the deep and left field. Listen, let's not even bury the lead. Greg, you're reading this ad, but I'm going to make your life a lot easier. I'm sitting in Nashville. Tonight at 7pm just 10 miles from here there's a woman in concert called Beyonce 71 bucks right

now whoa that's amazing right there Jesus uh music comedy theater sports and you get it all last minute don't stress enjoy getting ready for your concert you know know, go make a, I love it. I went to see Neil Young and people had gotten there early. They had set up a table. They had wine. They were, they had salmon. I was like, why don't I ever get my shit together before a concert and have a nice little thing like that outside my car? I always spend the first two songs hating myself and decompressing from all the stress i just put myself right right

right so um flash deals last minute tickets it gets real easy on your phone it's a couple of taps and it goes right into the app you don't have to print it you don't have to transfer it and i'm telling you it's just it's so easy to get in this way um don't worry about uh if you're if you if you buy tickets and they go down. GameTime will credit you 110% of the difference if you find tickets in the same section in a row. So do it. Snag the tickets without distress with GameTime. Download the GameTime app. Create an account and use code PAPERS for $20 off your first purchase. Terms apply. Again, create an account and redeem code PAPERS for $20 off.

Download GameTime today. Last-minute tickets, lowest price guaranteed. And then as you're saying, when you're pre-gaming, we have another sponsor here, which is First Leaf. I did First Leaf, and they're going to get you the wines you want and you bring them out there to the concert, bring them to the tailgating. They're saying summer's the best. Everything, there's fun going on every weekend and it's time to get First Leaf. So I went on and let me see what they want me to read here, but I'm going to tell you about my personal thing. You

have to answer some quick questions. So what they do is they profile you. Like, for instance, I don't like sweet white wine. That's a big one for me. So I ruled that out. I tell them what I like. They keep like kind of tweaking and customizing. Then they're like, we know you. We know your wine type.

We know what type of wine guy you are. And then the first delivery comes. It's so easy. Deliver to the door. The wines were great. They're turning me on to new wines. It was fantastic. So just go to the website. And the questionnaire is like, do you like blueberries? It takes all these different taste palettes and it combines them so that you find a wine. You wouldn't even know that type of wine appealed to you,

but they figure it out. They're like, yeah, do you like dark chocolate? They do like, you know, a lot of the, you know, sort of overtones in some of these wines. You know, they'll ask you about that as well. And then they're delivered right to your door. And every selection is backed by First Leaf's 100% satisfaction guarantee. So to make sure you got a great deal on wine when you want it this summer, you got to try First Leaf. Head over firstleaf.com slash papers to sign up and you'll get your first six hand curated bottles for just $44.95.

Six bottles for just $44.95. Six bottles for under 45 bucks. Go to tryfirstleaf.com slash papers. That's, sorry, it's tryfirstleaf.com papers. T-R-Y-F-I-R-S-T-L-E-A-F.com slash papers to get your first six bottles for under eight bucks a bottle. Tryfirstleaf.com slash papers to get your first six bottles for under eight bucks a bottle. Try firstleaf.com slash papers. I loved it. And I also just, I had forgotten I ordered it.

All of a sudden, there are six bottles of wine. It was fantastic. Right at my door. Well, the other thing is you can tell them what day to come so that you don't have to sit, wonder when the box is going to show up. So that they make it very convenient. It's great. All right. You got any paper there, Mike?

I think I can. There's a printer here, Greg. So hold on. Oh, my God. Do I have? I have fresh paper. Oh. I absolutely just ruined that printer.

This is like a professional podcast. Let's go to the papers. Extra! Extra! Let's go to the papers. What do we got? We got Leslie Van Houten. She was released on parole after spending 53 years in prison for the murders of Lino and Rosemary LaBianca. Sound familiar? She was released to parole supervision and will have a parole discharge review occurring after one year. While Manson did...

Oh, this is... She was one of Manson's girls. While Manson didn't commit the killings himself, he commanded his followers to do so. Manson died in prison in 2017. Van Houten was 19 when she participated in the 1969 murders of Leno LaBianca, a wealthy grocer, and his wife, Rosemary LaBianca, at their L.A. home. They were stabbed to death, and the word war was carved on Leno LaBianca's stomach, which authorities said were all under the orders of cult leader charles manson van houten was convicted of the murders in 1971 i'm looking at the location of their home waverly drive uh yeah it might have been i thought it was over like towards Feliz, but I also confuse all the murder locations.

No, it was. It was right down the block from the Greek Theater. Yeah. Let's call Tom O'Neill right now and get the background. I don't think he'll be able to hear you, unfortunately. I just think she's happy to be out and she just wants to spend the rest of her days with the family yeah we're a little early are you drunk yet no no i just laid down in my head at woo hotel so i just laid down

for 15 minutes um but i'm gonna meet them in a half hour and then we launch you will you launch what the drinking operation? Yeah. Yeah. I didn't tell you. Mary's here too. So it's Mary and Dimples have never met before. And they did last night and got on like firecrackers.

So we're going to reconvene and have a long one. I love it. All right. So listen, let's cut to it. You're just like Manson with all those girl followers. Oh, Mike just said you're just like Manson with all your girl followers. Exactly. So Leslie Van Houten is about to be released on parole. What are your feelings on this?

My first reaction is that you're always behind in the news. She was released three and a half days ago. Wait, stay with the breaking news Sunday papers. You got it. My feelings? Yeah. She earned it. You know, she was a model prisoner,

no infractions, got a master's degree and a PhD, 73 years old. If she's a threat, she's still going to, you know, No infractions. Got a master's degree and a PhD. 73 years old. If she's a threat, she's still going to have to get to her victims on a walker. So I wouldn't worry too much about her. She's been rehabilitated. If there's a parole system in place, it should be applied equitably. And she and the other family members have been political prisoners all these years

because the governors don't want to lose votes by their parole releases. All right, Tim, Gibbons agrees. And she should be released because she always does what she's told. Mike says she should be released because she always does what she's told. I forgot this was a comedy show.

I did Nightline last night. I've done about 10 radio interviews and a bunch of British TV call and TV chat shows. I forgot that this one is a little less respectful. Oh, please. Let me tell you something. The way you get into people's hearts and minds is with a little bit of humor. And, you know, you can go on Nightline

and they can play a lot of cello music underneath when you're talking somberly. But on Sunday papers, people get it. They get it, as Brody Stevens used to say. Don't be bitter, boys. You'll get there someday. All right, so tell us about her personality a little bit. Was she your favorite of the followers?

Oh, I never thought about that. She's definitely the one that is the most kind of acceptable as far as everything at face value is good. she's pretty she's quiet she's nice she's mousy she was a homecoming prisoner princess cheerleader you know as whereas the others patricia cronling will go bless her is not as attractive so that's going to keep her behind bars another 10 years and susan atkins died in jail brain cancer like 15 years ago but um as far as i don't have favorites it's come on wait so uh didn't in your book you you talked about how his followers were treated a little bit like prostitutes and told to sleep with certain people

was she one of those followers actually not yeah. Yeah, people within the family, but he never put her on the street because she got there too late. He had pretty much stopped prostituting them out away from the spawn ranch by the time she joined. She didn't come until like late 68. She was a late addition. Yeah. Okay. I did speak to her attorney yesterday, but it was off the record so i can't share the information but just know that you guys will be the last one i mean the first ones i go to

all right well listen tom we we encourage people to buy the book chaos the secret history of the cia during the 1960s i think that's the subtitle i don't know we can do a charades round and see if you guys remember but also jimmy was the big fan of the book shout out to james woods oh yeah what happened with that james woods posted about your book that people should read it. That is a great book. But then you also texted me that he blocked you on Instagram. Twitter, yeah. He blocked me a long time ago, probably a year ago, because I challenged something he said about Trump. And he doesn't like to be challenged with facts. I noticed, like most of those guys. So he blocked me. And then a year later, he's promoting my book, probably not remembering that he blocked

me so um i had to put a reminder out there i don't i guess he won't see it though unless one of your listeners sends him a tweet of my tweet all right let's all do that people yeah yeah tell jimmy woods to get back on board all right i love it all right tom well listen good luck drinking today say hi to dimples liz and mary for me we'll do it i'll be back tomorrow night okay great uh speech day on sunday well that's tomorrow night all right okay all right sunday all right we'll see you next week bye Bye. All right. That was good. That was good, Intel. Good for him.

He knows today's Saturday. At least he knows that. I know. So. Next story. Next story is. I'm ready for my close down, Mr. DeMille. Remember, we weren't going to make titles a little humorous.

Yeah, let's make funny titles. Cut. Actors go on strike. Joining the writers, the double strike by both unions is the first since 1960, when the SAG was headed by actor and former U.S. president and disgraced Ronald Reagan. The last strike by actors took place in 1980. The beginning

of the strike will mean that a vast majority of U.S. film and TV productions will be forced to stop, adding to a list of projects that have already shut down or stalled because of the writer's strike. For films already in production, the stoppage means that a large portion of work will become impossible. Even in cases in which filming has already been completed, actors will be unavailable for reshoots and other essential elements of the filmmaking process. TV shows that are still being filmed will also largely have to stop as actors become unavailable, although in some cases, side deals could be struck between performers and producers to allow work to continue.

I didn't know about that. Top Hollywood stars will not be able to attend events to promote new and upcoming releases events, including the Emmys and comic-con may be rescheduled or scaled back. There is some good news. However, all the women, all the women from sex in the city will not be allowed to work yes i know finally i've been trying to figure out a way to stop them

for two decades and uh there was a piece that was such a fluff piece in the new yorker last week about uh sarah jessica parker and uh they love her do you love her no they love her They love her. Do you love her? No, they love her. They love her. And I just think she comes off as such a people-pleasing, like, child star who never figured out who she was as an adult. Not on board. Well, you know, it didn't even take this. If puns and wordplay went on strike, there would have been no sex in the city.

Right. Here's what's great is now these actors are out on the picket line, which is good because the writers' picket line was getting a little thin on some days. And so now the actors are – because the actors want to be out there because now they're playing the role of someone who isn't really schmoozing with the writers to try to get roles when the strike ends. No, they're all watching Norma Rae. How do I do this? How do I hold up a sign for labor issues? Right. When the press shows up, there's just a pack of them standing in front of the cameras.

Yeah. So, you know, and who's the actor? Somebody really famous is paying for, he was paying for the writers to go to Bob's Big Boy and eat for free. Yeah. Who was that? You know, host of Paris is right. Drew Carey.

Oh, Drew Carey, right. I wonder if he's going to extend that for the actors as well. Oh, Drew Carey, right. I wonder if he's going to extend that for the actors as well. I think some gazillionaire actor who has far more money than Drew Carey can do that. Sean Penn can do that. Sean, yeah, except you have to go eat in Haiti. You have to go to a flood zone to get your sandwich. Yeah.

Yeah. To get your sandwich. Yeah. So Drew Carey's net worth is $180 million. Wow. Damn. What is... There's still actors. I think Clooney made that just on tequila.

Oh, really? Is he one of those guys? Yes. Chris, look up how much Clooney made on... And it's gotten way bigger than that first one, I think, because I think they... I might be wrong. I think they still have a... Maybe they don't have a piece of it anymore.

But just on tequila, there were three of them, three principal guys on Casamigos. Is it a good tequila? I mean, do you drink it? Speaking of wordplay, Casamigos. Is it a good tequila? I mean, do you drink it? Speaking of wordplay, Casamigos, it's highly... He made $240 million alone off of the tequila. Oh, my God. So, fuck Drew Carey's $180 million.

Damn. It was a $1 billion sale. True tequila guys, you know, true tequila purists hate it because there's additives. So the big thing now in tequila is identifying the additive-free brands. free uh brands oh and um theirs has a lot of vanilla in it which is why uh women especially love drinking it like on the rocks and stuff like and it's this patron was the same way uh denman is saying it's very big in hip-hop it become a brunch staple yeah it's become a brunch staple yeah okay because it's sweet uh blown case what's this um blown case the secret service announced thursday that has closed its investigation into the cocaine get it into the cocaine found at the white house earlier this month

and said it is not able to single out a person of interest because of a lack of physical evidence. The Secret Service said the cocaine was found on July 2 inside a receptacle used to temporarily store electronic and personal devices prior to entering the West Wing. At this time, the Secret Service's investigation is closed due to a lack of physical evidence, they said. So it just goes back to what we said last week. Someone please give the cocaine to Biden. Please. Yes. Yes.

I mean, he's, that's all he needs. He's a really good president. I mean, people hate him, but that's just, things are so partisan that if the president is not from your party, you just hate him. But if you look at the numbers, he's actually done a very good job. He's just boring and slow. Cocaine would be the perfect solution for this.

I think presidents, you know, the saying about baseball is I got to remember it now. about baseball is uh i gotta remember it now i think it's every team wins 60 games and every team every team wins 60 and every team loses 60 and it's what you do with the other 42 or however many are left and i think that's true with presidents like listen every president's gonna have bad shit and good but then what is that other third, basically? Right. And I actually, because I'm aligned with his issues, I kind of like what he's done. But don't get me wrong. I'm not denying the third that's bad. Yes. It reminds me of a bit that, as far as like now they've got this bag of cocaine.

Rich Seisler, rest in peace, was one of my really dear friends at Boston. He was a great comedian. Geisler, rest in peace, was one of my really dear friends at Boston. He was a great comedian. And he had this bit about, you know, how they go to schools and they bring like a bag of cocaine. And the cop shows up at the classroom and he's like, kids, drugs are bad for you. Stay away from drugs. This right here is a kilo of cocaine and uh it's an example of what

you should not do and he's like and then the the next month he comes back and he goes kids do not do cocaine it's very dangerous and bad for you i'm standing here with a half a kilo of cocaine and i'm telling you the dangers and he goes and he plays the bit out. He does like four bits until he's like, kids, this is an empty bag that had cocaine in it. Does anybody have $20 I can borrow? That's a good bit. Yeah, he was, I wish I could do his old material. Would that be wrong to just do great material

from a dead comedian? It should live on. He never recorded any of it, never did a special, none of that stuff. What's that? He never did a one-hour special on Netflix or Comedy Central. All that material just died when he died. It's so sad.

Yeah, that is sad. Okay, RFK Jr., I think you put this in here. Yes, I did. Presidential hopeful RFK Jr. threw a press dinner on Tuesday night that devolved into a shouting match between two elderly men. The mess started after a guest asked Kennedy a question about the environment, an inquiry that enraged former gossip columnist Doug Deschert, the reportedly drunk host of the whole event. Quote, the climate hoax, Deschert started to yell. His senile screams drew the ire of his longtime friend, art critic, and longtime Daily Beast contributor, Anthony Hayden Guest, who wasted no time condemning Deschert and pleading for him to shut up.

But Deschert was relentless, continuing to rant about the scam of climate change, while Hayden Guest disparaged him with insults, calling him fucking insane and insignificant. That's when Deschert brought out his secret weapon, a booming fart that he released while shouting, I'm farting! All while RFK Jr. calmly watched the gaseous chaos unfold. And this is, by the way, about three steps up from the political discourse that's going on in Congress right now.

This may be the new exclamation point for all these lunatics screaming at each other in Congress. Fucking vaccines, man. They make you fart. Yep. I'm sure RFK jumped all over that. Oh, yeah. Apparently living room warming is not a hoax. That room heated up right away. Yeah.

Yeah. And, uh, all right. So you're going to do it. I love that. He shouted. I'm farting.

I want to get to that age, you know, just like where you just, you know, cause so much of the early part of your life is you're trying, especially nowadays is not doing something that's going to ruin your reputation for the rest of your life. And then you get to that age, you got your savings, you got your pension, you got your country house.

You just fart and you announce it. That's so crazy. Okay, Windy City. As of Thursday afternoon, the Weather Service confirmed at least four tornadoes, including one that touched down near O'Hare International Airport. The twister sent passengers dashing for shelter at the airport and disrupted hundreds of flights, but no injuries were reported at the airport. Ty Carr, resident of the Skyline Motel in McCook, Illinois, said a tornado tore off its roof.

Just chaos, Carr said, cradling a toddler as he spoke to reporters. It was really fast, and the noises and the crackling in the wind, it was just something I've never seen or been through, you know? Hell, I caught this baby out of nowhere. I'm a goddamn hero. But the O'Hare Airport, because apparently there's video, they all ran to, I think United had an underground part in the airport or whatever, and they all ran to it.

But it just reminded me of that scene in the movie Airplane when the plane comes in and it crashes, and I guess it has no wheels, and it's just skidding down, and the PA announced goes flight 209 now arriving at gate eight, gate nine, gate 10, gate 13, 14, 15, 23. That's right. They did so many announcement jokes on that. Do you remember the, uh, uh, uh,

passengers getting out of remember the, uh, uh, uh, passengers, uh, getting out of their cars, uh, use the red curb zone only. And then, and then there's another announcer that, and they get into an argument. Yeah. The female announcer, it's not the red zone. It's the, yeah, yeah, yeah. It went back and forth. Um, do you know, I don't think we've ever talked about this, but airplane, I saw side-by-side footage of the movie they were parodying. It's exact. And then they added one trillion jokes. And I think there was even an athlete because Wilt Chamberlain was in the airplane movie. But I think it was James Brown was in the actual air.

I think it was called airport. Oh, wow. Jim Brown. Yeah. The, um, no, but it was like, when was the last time you flew a plane? It's like, I haven't flown it since I was in the service. Like it's the, like even the straight lines,

they kept the straight lines, but no kidding. Yes. And some, and some person said uh god that takes away from it a little i'm like i to tell you the truth it doesn't because yeah it's so many jokes and if you're sticking to that kind of script you know these are the most those are the most creative writers ever at that point and uh and uh, and it limits, you know, in other words, it does handcuff them a little, like they, they can't, they didn't change that much. Yeah. Um, I just think about shows or movies that would have been the most fun to write on.

And I always think about the Zazz movies about how much fun it would be to sit in a room and they probably just showed the film, paused it, watched some more of the film paused it i mean how great what do you think is the what do you think would be the most fun show in history to write on oh that's interesting i don't know because some of them, I think, you know, like The Office with Gervais, I think, you know, he would act out a lot, you know, while Merchant wrote it down, I think a little bit. I'm not sure. I think South Park would be up there for me. No, I'm terrified of that. I mean, did you see that, like, whatever it was called, like hours till air or eight days till air six days yeah yeah yeah there's a documentary on the making of a south park episode and it's the most stressful thing i've ever seen yeah they also i went in there for a meeting once with those guys i didn't

i obviously didn't get the job but they described to me uh you'll sit in a room and then Trey will tell you what the episode is. And then people will throw out a couple ideas and then he'll go into the next room for four hours and write the script. And then he'll come in and everybody will read it. He'll bounce a couple of thoughts off you and then he'll disappear for another four hours. And that's all you do. You never really go off on a script on your own. They don't table it with the writers. It's all him.

But, I mean, I think Airplane is a big one just because it's jokes, jokes, jokes, jokes, jokes. Even Raising Arizona, which is one of the funniest movies of all time, in my opinion, isn't like that. You know what I mean? It's so much more character. That's my number one movie of all time, Raising Arizona.

Comedy, right? No, any movie. Because it goes beyond a comedy. It deals with such big, heavy themes and darkness and death and rebirth. And, you know, John Goodman being birthed out of the ground when he escapes from the prison. Wait, what movie? There was a John Goodman movie I was talking about with someone this week. I forget what it was.

All right, let's do out of control pill. Out of control pill, because it's a birth control pill. U.S. officials have approved the first over-the-counter birth control pill, which will let American women and girls buy contraception medication from the same aisle as aspirin and eye drops.

If you ask me, that sounds like a very disorganized pharmacy. Who put aisle three together? What's going on in aisle three? Just a bunch of young girls looking through sort of like foot patches that you put on your boils to get to the pills? Aspirin and birth control pills? If you had a headache, how did you get pregnant? The Food and Drug Administration said Thursday

it cleared Perigo's once-a-day O-Pill to be sold without prescription, making it the first such medication to be moved out from behind the pharmacy counter. The company won't start shipping the pill until early next year, and there will be no age restrictions on sales. Great. Can't wait for Kid Rock and others like him to start shooting boxes of contraception pills. Come at it. Come at it, conservatives.

Yeah. Well, I think Bill Maher is going to have these in candy dishes on a table by his front door. Just grab a couple on the way out, girls. It's bad news for fetuses because at least before they got to live for a few months, you know, and now it's just a few days and half of that is spent searching the aisles of Walgreens. It's not even a few days, hopefully. I don't think. They're just a zygote at that point.

Yeah. All right. What do we got? We got entertainment. Here we go. All right, we got a letter from John Hayburn from Robbinsville, New Jersey. Hey, John, come out to my shows in New Jersey this weekend. Gentlemen, heard Mike talking about Werner Herzog's Burden of Dreams.

Can I just tell you, Mike, I sent you a couple of them, but you got a bunch of letters from people about Werner Herzog. Yeah, I did read them. You definitely have to check out the Documentary Now episode based on this. It's a two-parter called Soldier of Illusion about a director who takes on two projects simultaneously. A film chronicling the Dushkur people during their Tuzhan sheep breeding season. And a CBS sitcom pilot called The Bachelor Nanny, both filmed on location in the remote Russian

mountains. Oh, that sounds amazing. Have you seen that? No, I have not seen that. Oh my God. Oh, I love it. I love that show so much. Documentary now? Yes. And even if you haven't seen, if you've seen the documentary it's based on, it's off the charts.

But even if you haven't seen it, it's still amazing. Yeah, I love the one on Grey Gardens where they play the two old women. Yes. That one was so good. But unfortunately, like, Fred and Bill are not in as many of them as they used to be. And now it's like, I think it's executive produced by Seth Meyers. And I've never seen him in one. Oh, wow.

All right. Okay. Let's make America Florida. Here it comes. All right. Muscote, Floridaida never even heard of it giselle robinson 36 was arrested monday for walking around naked with only a towel wrapped around her and exposing herself to children the children said robinson walked over to the car they were in. Oh, sorry. The children said the woman Robinson walked over to the car they were in

from a nearby Circle K to ask them if they had a lighter. When the kids asked why she didn't have clothes on, Robinson said she was, quote, too lazy to put clothes on. When one of the kids began recording her on his cell phone, Robinson dropped her towel, exposing her naked body. When officers arrived at the Dollar General, this has all the ingredients of a Florida story.

They found an intoxicated Robinson wearing a towel and carrying an alcoholic beverage. Police went inside the Dollar General to ask if they would donate clothes, which they did. So Robinson was no longer exposed. She was then taken to jail where she is being held on $10,000 bond. The police probably went back into Dollar General, but Dollar General did not give the $10,000 for the bond. I can see when she arrives at the jail, all the local Florida reporters are standing out front going, who are you wearing?

Who are you wearing? And then she gets into her jail cell and, like, she got to know the other inmates. One was dressed in store 24. Another was dressed in Chuck E. Cheese. I think the bond was going to be a lot lower, but then the judge is like, this bitch is wearing all new clothes. The tags are still on them. She's got money. She's a general. She looks like a general. You ever been to a dollar general?

I have not. I have not. I always feel like a spoiled person when I realize that I've been to a Walmart maybe twice in my life. Same. Never been to a Dollar General. I've never taken a bus in the city of Los Angeles. Oh, I have. Have you really?

Because, yeah, I left my car at a bar. So once? I think I've been on a bus, yeah, at least once, but I can only remember once. Meanwhile, if you, you know, living in New York in the city for 10 years, which you both did, I took the subway three to four times a day and I took buses. I didn take buses that much but at least once a week I took a bus I remember Dudley was in town our buddy Dudley and he was staying he was he was doing sports down by at Staples they put him up in a hotel and all of a sudden he appeared on the west side he was with us and we're like how'd you get here he's like oh dude you have the best bus system ever I hopped on the bus it was an express it gets on the west side he was with us and we're like how'd you get here he's like oh dude you have the best bus system ever i hopped on the bus it was an express it gets on the 10

and it just goes to the west side yeah no kidding wow yeah um all right time to make australia florida let's make australia florida australia's worst female serial killer freed after her children's deadly gene mutations come to light. This story is amazing. Kathleen Fulbig, a 55-year-old woman from New South Wales, was accused of murdering her two daughters and son, as well as committing manslaughter against her other son between 89 and 99. In 2003, she was sentenced to 25 years in maximum security prison, where she remained until her release earlier this month.

Due to the nature of her alleged crimes, the media nicknamed her Australia's worst female serial killer. But I think that's like the water that goes down the toilet the opposite way in Australia, because it sounds like she's Australia's best female serial killer. Yeah, the phrasing is a little weird. And the other thing that they should mention is that the kids were all very young. Yeah, they were like babies.

Yeah. Um, okay. But on June 5th, 2023, last month, she was pardoned by the government and was released from prison after evidence presented at a recent inquiry suggested that her children most likely died of natural causes. The inquiry, which began in 2022 revealed that both of her daughters had an extremely rare and previously unknown mutation of the COM2 gene. Luckily, I don't have any COM genes, so that's, I'm no problem. And anyway, it's the key for shutting calcium, shuttling calcium through tissues that can cause sudden cardiac arrest. Meanwhile, her sons carried a mutation of the BSN gene needed to build function brain cells, which has been linked to an early onset and lethal form of epilepsy. In her initial conviction, there had been no physical evidence

to suggest that she killed the infants. get this they are right they were right she is australia's worst female serial killer she couldn't even kill one kid totally ineffective as a child killer one of the worst of all time i mean this is really like a huge, this is a big deal to misunderstand. Yeah. Turns out she said she killed her kids. She meant the baby goats on her farm. When she said she killed Joey, that was a kangaroo baby that ran in front of her car. It's all a misunderstanding.

She also had the worst lawyer who said, listen, I can get you out of this. You just got to say a dingo did it A dingo killed All of your babies That's the standard in Australia That's the go-to defense Imagine this poor woman That's the worst thing

You can be accused of That's worse than killing A regular person like you know an adult yeah and not only are you dealing with the grief of losing four kids yeah oh my god what a nightmare see i said nightmare nightmare let's do some sports let's do some sports. Let's do some sports. You love this story because the algorithm knows you when it sends you stories like this. Former people flipping out. Former USA Gymnastics team doctor Larry Nassar was stabbed in prison after a comment he allegedly made while watching the women's Wimbledon tennis tournament with other inmates.

Nassar, who was convicted of sexually assaulting U.S. Gymnastics team members. Remember, he was giving them vaginal examinations when they didn't need them and uh there was a lot of yeah like twice a day yeah uh i wish there were girls playing he said while watching i wish there were girls playing instead of women uh the comment according to sources led a fellow inmate to go to nassar's cell later in the day and stab him at least six times with a manufactured weapon, according to sources. Jesus. Yeah. Yeah, they get very upset by the comment.

Well, also the girls he wants to watch at Wimbledon can still wear their white panties because they haven't gotten their period yet. So he might have a thing there, actually. I noticed that. We did that story last week, and then I watched a couple women's matches this week, and yeah, they're all wearing the dark. They should have worn maroon, though, if they really want to hide the blood. You just are trying to get maroon wherever you can get it involved with sports. So a woman who won the women's Wimbledon was unseated.

It's the first time in history that an unseated woman has won a tournament. Oh, because the finals were today? Yes. Where's she from? Czechoslovakia. Ah. Like Martina Navratilova. Yes.

And she beat out that woman who I love, the Tunisian woman. Oh, I don't know. I forget her name. But although I do doubt she's from Czechoslovakia. Where do you think she's from? Well, Martina's from there, but it no longer exists. Oh, Czech Republic. There you go, buddy.

Meanwhile, the men's finals. Three people just stopped writing their correction for next week. This will be, by the time you listen to this, the match will be over. But the men's final is going to be Alcarez and Djokovic, which is going to be historic. I should get back into it. Who's Alcarez and Djokovic, which is going to be historic. I should get back into it. Who's Alcarez? He is this – he's ranked number one in the world. He's this hot shot Spaniard.

Oh, Jabbour was the woman's player. Hot shot Spaniard who has taken the tennis world by storm. He's fast. He's powerful. And so he gets you back behind the baseline because he's hitting it so hard. And then he's got this lethal drop shot, like as good as Johnny Max.

And so he's amazing. And he's also got this great personality. People love him. He's without a doubt the future of tennis. And so now he's playing. Okay, I'm going to brush up on that guy and then watch it tomorrow. And now he's playing. Okay, I'm going to brush up on that guy and then watch it tomorrow. And now he's playing Djokovic, who has got more grand slams than anybody in history.

And is looking to add one more to his lead. I think he's only got one more than Nadal. I think he just did it. He might have had more, but remember, he was banned from Australia because he's unvaccinated. That's right. Right. had more but remember he was banned from australia because he's unvaccinated that's right right uh yeah all right that's good international nine seconds in paradise. An Italian court rules that groping under 10 seconds is not illegal. In their decision, the judges said they acquitted the accused 66-year-old man of sexual assault because the whole thing lasted about 5 to 10 seconds.

thing lasted about five to ten seconds the school janitor was found not guilty of groping a student because the act only lasted less than 10 seconds and this sparked outrage in italy the student testified that she pulled up her trousers and felt a hand tucked inside them under her briefs touching her buttocks wait i don't understand that. Why was she pulling up her trousers? You mean they should just be low below her genitals? Well, why were they low? Maybe because a 66-year-old man's forearm was pushing them down. Oh, I see. So he goes, love, you know I was only joking, which is weird.

Doesn't sound Italian. The janitor said that according to the teenager's testimony that she mentioned in the judgment. Italians have taken to Instagram and TikTok to post videos of themselves touching a sensitive part of their body for 10 seconds. I'll watch that depending on who it is. And it's marked by a timer in an attempt to show that it is actually a fairly long period, which can make people uncomfortable and change a person's life. So just to review, the headline here is Italians can't stop touching others and themselves. And that does not sound like a news story to me. Yeah. Yeah.

Do you remember when COVID, it first exploded in Italy? And I was like, yeah, maybe because they rubbed their hands all over each other's faces all day. I think my wife must be Italian because I only get 10 seconds. That's it. I only get 10 seconds. That's it. It's like basketball where you can only be on the paint for like three seconds.

Yeah. Because those guys are a little handsy. There's stuff going on. There's some touching. There's some groping. Listen, I'll go on camera. I'll touch myself for a lot longer than 10 seconds, but will that defeat the purpose? I'll spend half a day on that.

I mean, look, there is a defense. The guy's a janitor. He's like, hey, they told me to clean up the dirty things. You got a stinky poopy hole. I clean it up, okay? Poor girl had all these wounds, though, from the big ring of keys that he had. He wouldn't let go of those. Oh, man.

What's Jeslenik's joke about the blind? He had a blind janitor in school, and the rumor all the time was, because they were in grammar school, they were really young, was they got it that he went blind from masturbating all the time. Oh, I don't know that. And I'm trying to remember, oh, God, I just blew it. See if you can look it up, Chris. Denman, you can find it.

It's his joke, and I might have even spoiled it, giving it away. Anyway. All right, let's get on to the Germans. Go for it. An African lady based in Germany has disclosed that due to the scarcity of men in that country, women have resulted in paying men to sleep with them. She hails from Nigeria and back home men approach women to start a relationship. And due to that, the ladies are never lonely or single. But in Germany, it's the opposite.

And so she explained that the issue is very serious. They literally have to beg men to visit them because they are single and they have to pay for the transportation of the men. The lady continued that even after paying for their transportation, they need to cook for them to eat when they arrive. Wow. So let me again. So to get laid, you have to pay for like cabs and their meal and beg them. That sounds a little familiar, said every man from the past 1000 years. Yeah. Yeah. You will see now as it used to be for us. Maybe the problem is that she's black in the most racist country in the world.

Could it be that's working against you? Here's what you do. Don't pay the men. Save the money. Buy a bus ticket. Go to Amsterdam where they will pay you to have sex. Exactly. How about any other country in the world, I guess?

Okay, here's Jelemuk's joke. When I was in high school, my high school employed a blind janitor, 100% totally blind. All the other kids would joke around that he went blind from masturbating too much. At the time, I believed that. I was just a kid. I didn't know any better. It wasn't until I got older and wiser that I realized that's just an old wives tale that they used to try to explain why he was

always masturbating. That's such a good joke. Where are we going? Where are we going here? Let's cut all the way down to this day in history. Here we go. I remember this day.

July 16th, 1999. John F. Kennedy Jr., his wife Carolyn Bessette Kennedy, and her sister Lauren Bessette die when the single-engine plane that Kennedy was piloting crashes into the Atlantic Ocean near Martha's Vineyard. JFK Jr. was born in 1960, just a few weeks after his father and namesake was elected the 35th president of the U.S. John John attended the funeral of his father and was photographed saluting his father's coffin in a famous image.

He was raised in Manhattan by his mother, Jacqueline, graduated from Brown, and then passed the bar, the law bar, on his third try. Worked as a DA, started a magazine. I forgot about this. He started that magazine, George. George. Oh, yeah. magazine george oh yeah always in the media spotlight celebrated for his good looks that he inherited from his parents in 1988 he was named the sexiest man alive by people magazine linked romantically with several celebrities daryl hannah in september 96 he married girlfriend

carolyn beset a fashion publicist and we stop to say, Mike was a good friend of hers in college. She went to BU with us. Really good friend. And I'll tell one story that's very, very haunting about John John. Well, I will just add that she is, with the exception of my wife, the most beautiful woman I've ever seen in my life. And as everyone who knew her said, the pictures, every single picture you saw of her did not do justice. And I think it's why she wasn't a model. For some reason, the camera hated her like this.

There's no other way to say it. I don't know what it is, but it's the same way that average looking people can pop on camera in a good way, I guess. So we were really good friends. And, and actually I was, she came to visit me on the vineyard at Jack's place and stay, you know, stay there for a long weekend. And anyway, we were really good friends at BU and afterwards, then I lost touch with her and she's now all over the press and she's married to John John, uh, or John, I guess, but I won't call him John John. And so I'm jogging down in, uh, by Enmore street. That's the part they lived on Enmore street in Tribeca. And I see Carolyn, Carolyn on the corner and I'm like, Oh my God. And we, you know, hug it out and oh my God, blah, blah. And she's like, and we're talking for a long time.

And then finally, like, you know, I have to go. And she's like, all right, well, she's like, I wish he's getting the car. Like we're going away this weekend. And I was like, oh man, I'm sorry to miss him. And I've never met him. And she goes, I'm like, where are you going? He's like, well, he's probably having trouble like tying the kayaks on the roof for all this because, and she goes, he it's always an adventure. And he, she goes, if he doesn't almost die every single weekend, he's not living. No kidding. Yeah. Wow.

And it is true. Like that's not even an outlandish comment. Like when you saw his life, like it was always, you know, of course he got his pilot's license. Like, and he was always doing these really outgoing, adventurous things. I then he kayaked one is one of the first people it's back now but he would kayak in the hudson river and all around the southern tip of manhattan and now that's very popular but uh it's still you have to be very careful anyway he only had 300 hours of flying experience but he flew the single engine plane it's a hazy moonless uh night uh he turned down an offer by one of his flight instructors to accompany him saying he wanted to but he flew the single-engine plane into hazy, moonless night. He turned down an offer by one of his flight instructors to accompany him, saying he wanted to do it alone. He was going to go to Martha's Vineyard first and drop off his sister-in-law.

He had not qualified for a license to fly with instruments only. In addition, he was recovering from a broken ankle, which might have affected his ability to pilot the plane. So anyway, very sadly, he crashed into the Atlantic. The Navy divers recovered the bodies 116 feet under the water just off Martha's Vineyard. And a private mass for him and Carolyn was held at the Church of St. Thomas More in Manhattan. And Clinton and his wife were there, 300 invited guests. Senator Kennedy made a speech. He said from the first day of his life, John seemed to belong not only to our family,

but to the American family. He had a legacy and he learned to treasure it. He was part of a legend and he learned to live with it. You know, there's all these conspiracy theories that his plane was fucked with and that there was all this political motivation to kill him and all that. But from what I heard, it was a very sad and standard death spiral, I think is maybe the nickname for it yeah and you and you need despite every instinct you're having and and someone i i guarantee someone will write in and

correct me or clarify this but you're supposed to ignore every instinct you have and absolutely trust the monitors yeah the instruments the flight instruments and what they're saying i think there's even something like where you take your hands off the wheel and because you're you're actually turning into it in the wrong way there's something like but it's an incredibly challenging thing which now and i think it's always been standard practice that you go up with a flight instructor and I think you kill the engine even, but you go, you, you try to simulate that spiral and you have to get out of it. Yeah. Uh, our friend Ken Fink had a pilot license and he went to Catalina Island off LA and then he was flying out, and that island gets a fog over it sometimes. And he and his wife were in the plane, and they took off, and it was fog. And he said they were both absolutely convinced they were going to die

because, like you said, you have to rely. His instinct was to bank left because that's what he was feeling, and then when they came out of that fog, it was like they came back to life again. He was so scared. Imagine you can't see 18 inches in front of you. Yeah. You're just in clouds. It must be terrifying.

Right. Yeah. Anyway, let's do letters to the editor. Let's cheer up with some angry people writing Now this person was very touched Did you put this in? Oh, I did put this in Yeah, okay

I didn't know you read the YouTube comments I occasionally go on there Because I love watching people complain about our sound quality So this is from a YouTube comment. I don't know if he wants to say the name, but anyway, my father passed away on Sunday. I was listening to the Sunday papers when I got the phone call. It's Tuesday now, and I came back to finish the podcast.

Hug your parents while you can, you good peoples. They won't be around forever my dad was invincible to me but none of us are invincible we all cash that check we all cash that check one love thank you Greg and Mike for all the great entertainment

keep it up cheers RIP dad who is Dave Drollette love ya what a nice message. And I've been remiss, Greg. I have not listened to your podcast yet because I would have commented on it. And I will listen to it this week. Right.

Well, thank you for writing in. I know it's a vulnerable time and you feel a lot of stuff about your dad. And I'm glad that your initial feelings about him are so strong. A lot of people feel, you know, people have tough relationships with their parents and when they die, they feel like there's unfinished business and, uh, you know, they're overcoming resentments or whatever. And it sounds like you left with him in a good place. Obviously you, you, you always wish you could have done more, been with them more. But,

uh, yeah, I flew down and saw my mom this year. Cause I just realized she's not going to be around forever. And I got to start going down to Florida more often and just spending four or five days with her. I mean, I will say it's a little disappointing that he interrupted the podcast when he

got the call. It's not really a fan. If you what i mean so this isn't we should not count this as fan mail because a true fan probably would have taken the call they'd be more committed get the news they would have finished it right away right there's a certain level of commitment we ask from you people i don't think it's asking a lot we show up yep we expect you to sure i mean i would expect that uh we're gonna lose people in our lives and we're gonna show up for the podcast um all right let's get to bob lynn lynn ad who says as much as you harp on bernie's, I haven't heard this one from you. Noticed it the other day. It's just my job. Five days a week. This from Rocket Man. It's just my job. Five days a week. So he's flying back on Friday to see his family thoughts.

He's right. Of course he's right. It's just my job. But yeah, that's what all wives of astronauts say. Yeah, he's a nine to fiver. That's all. I don't know why. I don't know why this is so stressful. He's just doing it five days a week.

Yeah. Hey, where's John? Where's John? He's on the moon for a month, but he should be home in about an hour for the weekend. He's also quarantined. When they get back, they have to see their spouse through a piece of plate glass. I think that happened back then. That's good. Thank you for that. Obituary. Here we go.

And that's all thank you for that obituary here we go and that's all folks that's a good one you put in here this guy was absolutely one of my favorite novelists of all time he is a philosopher he was a

existentialist and his name was Milan Kandura he was a Czech French writer best known for writing the novel Unbearable Lightness of Being in 1984. Set in the 1968 Prague Spring, a period of mass protests and reforms in Czechoslovakia. You mean the Czech Republic? Yes. Well, no, no. I don't. The Unbearable Lightness of Being explores the lives of artists and intellectuals during the time of upheaval.

A Communist Party member who advocated for party reform, Kandura himself was involved in the protests of Prague Spring. As pressure increased on reformists like Kandura, he fled the country for France in 1975. 1975 his other novels include the the his debut the joke which by the way the the joke was about a party member that made a joke and it was taken wrong by the public and he was a he was a college professor and it just talks about how his life goes into complete. He was canceled. His life was completely ruined because of this joke that he told. Wow. It's brilliant. Highly recommend it. The Book of Laughter and Forgetting is amazing.

And Slowness is first. I actually haven't read Slowness. But they made a film in 1988 starring Daniel Day-Lewis, Juliette Binoche, and Lena Olin. You want to talk about a sexy fucking movie. Yeah, watch that one. It's a beautiful, wonderful movie, but it's also very sexy. He said that he would no longer allow his work

to be adapted for the screen after his experience with the film. Wow. Even though the film earned an Oscar nomination for the screenplay. Notable quote, a novel that does not uncover a hitherto unknown segment of existence is immoral. Knowledge is the only morality. Alrighty then. Yeah. Guy's intense. Yeah, he is intense. knowledge is the only morality alrighty then yeah

guy's intense yeah he is intense I got a that's I think I read half of it in college I got audible credits I think it was

a college of basic studies book it was in our it was in our philosophy class but when we got to existentialism we had to read sartre the um nausea by sartre and the unbearable lightness of being by kandura along the way i also read the moviegoer which is supposedly the like existential novel um

who wrote it uh percy walker walker, Percy, Percy Walker, Walker, Walker, Percy. I always flip the two. He's the guy that, uh, discovered, um, yeah. Uh, Confederacy of Dunces. Yes. Uh, let's get to the funnies. You got it, Pally. All right. All right.

All right, we got Hager the Horrible, and Lucky is standing by a pond with golf clubs, and he goes, Hager, my ball landed in the water hazard. And then you hear from offscreen, Lucky you, and cut to Hager, who does not have his helmet on. Hager's bald? It's been stripped from his head. He's bald.

And there are two ogres, and Hager goes, my ball landed in the troll hazard, and he's got ropes. He is bound at his wrists and ankles, and the ogre is looking at him sexually and has his hand on his chest. So Hager is about to be the victim of rape, has his hand on his chest so hagger is about to be the victim of rape which has got to be uh you know that's got to feel good for all his victims when they read this one it looks like the uh the trolls are wearing diapers yes yeah that is very strange that's a weird detail. And one of them's got Hager's helmet on.

Yeah. And they're gimp trolls. Denman is saying, check out the gimp troll in the back. Yeah, I guess they're like gimps. I guess it's like the Pulp Fiction scene. I guess so. All right, we got some good Lockhorns. We always say golf is a tough game.

Yes. In the Lockhorns, Leroy is asleep on the couch with a remote control in his hand and Loretta's walking by with her friend and she goes, that's one of the seven habits of unsuccessful people. Joke.

It's a joke. The next one is Leroy pouring some coffee uh he is he and his friend are talking and they're standing in front of the refrigerator and leroy goes that's the tomb of the unknown leftover jokes finally finally leroy and loretta this is what i love about this strip he shit she shits on him, he shits on her. And then in the last one, they both get shit on. And they're standing at a front door of a house and Leroy looks at his wife and says,

have you noticed we haven't seen the Lennarts as much since they got that video doorbell? Here comes a far side at you there is a concert going on you see the band on stage and we're right over the shoulder of the soundboard and the sound guy and it's um the the caption is raymond's last day as the band's sound technician and you see Raymond touching a button and there's all these buttons mid-range bass reverb but there's one button that says suck and that's the one that Raymond's hand is on pure absurdity speaking of absurd oh I've never seen her wear jeans. Yeah, Blondie's wearing jeans. I have not seen this either.

And they are painted on her rump and legs. She's got on matching kind of a fuchsia shirt and shoes. And she's, of course, doing dishes while Fuckface walks in with his hands in his pockets. And he goes goes looking good gorgeous have i told you how beautiful you are today and you're like oh look at that this guy is showing up he's actually acting like a man and then she turns around and goes why thank you honey but you know that you won't get out of finishing up the dishes and the third frame is him doing dishes going, that always works in those Hallmark movies. How about this, Dagwood?

How about you appreciate how hot your wife looks in those fucking jeans? Like without an ulterior motive. How about you give her some feedback so she can, I mean, it's either food or laziness. And meanwhile, can you imagine living in a house? The kids have moved out.

You're alone in the house with this golden haired goddess. And all you want to do is sleep on the couch and eat bologna sandwiches. It's a fucking waste. More slacks on this lady in the future yes i like it i like it a lot yeah you know what else i like a lot i like wine being delivered to my house after i've informed them of what kind of wine i like which is why you're going to go to

try first leaf.com and use slash papers. Get your first six bottles for under $8 a bottle. We also want to remind you about Game Time, where you can get your tickets cheaper. If you download the app and you create an account, redeem code PAPERS, get $20 off. Tomorrow night in Nashville, Blink 182, 44 bucks. Don't blink or you'll miss it. No, blink, it'll go down.

We want to thank Midcoast Media, Chris Denman and Beth Hoops and John and Keith for all doing such a great job keeping the show going. Apparently, we're getting new microphones from Chris Denman. So the sound is going to be even better on this show. Oh, I like it. Anything you want to promote? Yeah. Listen to Neil Young's Live at Macy Hall.

If anyone wants to kind of get the spirit of what we were hearing and how intimate it is. And there's a quality about his tenor this like angelic voice and the first track is old man my no no it's uh on the way home and it's one of my favorite favorite neil young songs and do yourself a favor and just put that album on. It's so, it makes you feel great. I love his intro to old man on that album. Um, yeah, yeah, yeah. And, uh, yeah. Otherwise we just want you guys to have a good week. We want you to enjoy this hot weather. Hopefully you're near the beach and, uh, we'll see you next week. I think everyone should also go to the beach and take a dish. Go to the beach and take a dish!

There it is! All right, bye-bye. Hey there, Greg. Hey there, Mike. You know just what we like. Hey there, Greg. Hey there, Greg Hey there, Mike You know just what we like Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

It's a Sunday, Sunday, Sunday, Sunday papers Ah, yes it is, yes it is, yes it is And you better believe it So gimme, gimme, gimme, gimme, gimme that Sunday fix Hey there Greg, hey there Mike You know just what we like It's a Sunday, Sunday, Sunday, Sunday papers It's a Sunday, Sunday papers It's a Sunday Sunday papers

They put the funny funny funny On the weekly stories All solid light Here comes the critical They put the funny on the stories. Hey there, Greg. Hey there, Mike. You know just what we like.

So give it to us. Right now. Sunday, Sunday, Sunday, Sunday Papers. So get your ass on that Sunday paper train. Sunday, Sunday, Sunday, Sunday Papers.