Sunday Papers - Sunday Papers w/ Greg and Mike Ep: 276 8/17/25

Episode Date: August 17, 2025

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Sunday Papers, Greg and Mike, it's the news that you might like. Irregardless, it will make you laugh. Sunday Papers time. Three, two, one. There we go. Read all about it. Read all about it.

There he goes. Summer is almost over, but the news keeps coming. It's wild that kids are going back to school now. I know. It's insane. I feel like summers, we were all complaining about June gloom. And I feel summer is just getting started, which weather-wise, it is. How many times you've been in the ocean this summer?

None. Wow. Which is, and, you know, I have that little dumb tradition, every memorial day. So I jump started. I always jump in a body of water. This year it was a pool, though, which is no big. deal. But I'm just saying normally it's a lake, a river, or an ocean, and I make myself do it. And I didn't this year, and sure enough, it slipped away. All right, well, listen, here's how you're going

to get the most out of your summer. We're going up. You've been invited to Vermont the week after Labor Day. I know. I can't do it. Oh, no. Yeah, and I'm on the East Coast, but I'm in New York at Sophie's. Anyway, we'll talk about it. But, yeah, I know, that's great. Yeah, you're going to miss a good weekend uh so all right quite a summer night last night oh my god what a perfect summer well not only night but day yeah we your idea my idea two years in a row that's so funny i all right here's here's what we did we went to roosevelt golf course which is in griffith park in los some some call it roosevelt what did i call it roosevelt what did i call it Roosevelt.

Roosevelt. No, Roosevelt. Yeah, which is that? Roosevelt? I actually don't know. I call it Roosevelt always, but I don't know what. We should say it the same way because we're from the same county in New York, but there's this test that the New York Times came up with years ago.

Did you ever take this test where they give you like 20 questions about how do you pronounce this word? What do you call a sandwich, a hoagie, a grinder, a wedge? Yeah. And you fill it out. And it told me within 15 miles where I grew up. Oh, my goodness. Yeah, it's crazy. Oh, that's because you use the N-word.

Yeah, that narrowed it down to only 99% of white America right now. What do you yell when you hit your finger with a hammer trying to nail something in? It identifies everyone in the country. Yeah. What do you yell while honking? for me it would be like oh you're from london you throw that seward around with reckless abandon hey you kept us on the algorithm mike well done yes exactly we got a couple stories are going to kick us right off anyway so we played golf it was uh fitz gibbons fitzsimmons and gibbons and then we had about seven other guys and we played a four o'clock round

we're a beautiful course carved out of the wilderness deer we had deer on the second hole I know that was very cool and then we the key to this plan is and it's why I thought of it is you park at the golf course and then the Greek theater which if you are to see any live music in Los Angeles the Greek is the most special place to see a show that's great it's outdoor it's carved out of the the canyon there and so instead of having to find a parking spot you keep your car at the golf course you walk across the street we waited this is i explain your ticket buying uh strategy

well like what we did last year is first of your grandfathered in so you don't pay i i'm guessing it's more than 50 dollars to park i don't know it becomes you're already there yeah already there and then i always uh buy tickets last minute and you watch a couple of the apps and this time because we wanted as many of us together as possible at the last minute i'd say an hour before the show we got eight together but of all things we went to ticket master because we got like they they had them and anyway cheap we got a there are 45 dollar tickets of course that almost doubles with ticket masters uh you know extras and of course no you're cheap the tickets weren't cheap you are we're literally we're on the sixth hole and everybody's like can we buy the fucking tickets you're like no no no we got to wait so we get the tickets we are literally in the last row of the place on the side to the side you can't even see the drummer we're closer than 80% of the people how is that look at the map you know how far back it goes the place holds 6,000 people all right I just well all I know is I had a rail behind

behind my head that had wilderness on the other side of it. That's how far back. We liked that, but we all wanted to, anyway, whatever, I couldn't buy it on the course because I didn't know if the other five had bought theirs. All right. Let's talk about Tedeschi trucks because I, I'm kind of new to them. I know you've seen them before, but Jesus Christ, Derek Trucks is one of the great, I mean, first of all, they covered, here's where his roots come from.

They covered Clapton, he covered Stevie Ray Vaughn, and then DeBron. Beatles, where George Harrison is one of the most underrated guitar players in history. Everybody thinks of the Beatles as the brand, but he was incredible. So anyway, and then Susan Tedesky has of, she is, I said this last night, her musical IQ is off the charts, her understanding of blues and it's incredible. I mean, I've gone on about them at nauseam. They're amazing, but hold on, I'm not letting go to the seating. keep in mind there's your seating chart yeah and the orange way up top is still seats

why don't you put it in front of the camera there we go all right yeah um but then for the last four songs we walked down and stood in the dead center of the theater and that was incredible yeah but you get as close to the soundboard as you can but they were amazing uh bell bottom blues they pulled out they ended with a little help for my friends which just was insane and i listen And she's great and everything. Truly is. I love everything. I mean, three horn players, three backup singers, two drum sets.

The keyboardists. They co-headlined, I guess. They shared the bill. So we got a little less of them this time. But normally they flex all their muscles. And like someone will come down, sing a solo. The female trombonist ripped it up. Like she was amazing.

That was the biggest applause break of the night. It was after herself. she went to town on that yeah yeah anyway see them they're on a big tour they're on tour through october they're almost they're one of those bands though this is their job they're kind of always on tour so please look them up yeah i mean it's so soulful yeah it's amazing and his you know i he's my favorite living guitarist there i don't even i don't even know who a second is so uh well they uh the other thing that's great is the sound mix it's very much like an all brothers sound mix where they don't the vocals don't overshadow the bass or the drums like everything is

like everybody's working as a team there's like a very unified sound to it i was sitting next to kip and kipp is so funny and kipp's like so wait tell me tell me about them a little like this is his first to desky trucks so i'm like yeah no him and he's thinking what's his deal i'm like well his uncle was the drummer the almond brothers i go but he was a prodigy he was on stage playing guitar at eight years old there's footage on YouTube. He's like, really, really? I'm like, I go, I mean, for me, he's, you know, top five guitarist for sure, you know, that do this. I mean, I'm not comparing him to jazz guys or or classical. But anyway, Kip then talks to the guys over there and he comes back. He's like, they say, Rolling Stone said he's top 14, in the top 14 guitars, living or dead. And then,

you know, I guess maybe Kip was pretty stone, but he just kept like any solo that happened. And he would just be like or dead or dead like that's quite a he's like or dead like forever like that's that's everyone who's dead like that's impressive and then and then there was one

there was one solo that was so crazy where he was jumping frets and just making this unbelievable sound there's probably a name for it I don't know it and he's like all of a sudden he leans over he's like

I'm saying top of He just kept lowering it throughout the whole show. Well, I want to describe his entrance into the arena. We're walking through security, and he's got an open bottle of red wine, and he starts walking to security. And this theater is kind of like an NPR crowd. It's very laid back. It is not the Meadowlands, where they shake you down, metal detector, yell at you.

Everyone's just kind of groovy and walking through. And he works in with an open bottle of red wine. And they go, sir, you can't. And he goes, what? I can't walk in with an open bottle of wine. And he just, by the way, no cup, no cup. He's drinking out of the bottle of red wine. Yes.

Yeah. And I had a lovely mushroom experience. I took just the right amount. Yeah, I wasn't going to trust you. The fits facts. I'm like, so Greg in the parking lot shows me a mushroom chocolate bar, which has the squares on it. I'm like, so a microdose is one. and you go, or three.

So already, I'm out. I am out. I don't want, I don't want to, like, wonder if I'm always going to be this way through the whole show and all the paranoid thoughts that come. And I'm like, what do you mean? And you're like, look, read the package. A micro dose is one to three. I'm like, that's a pretty big range.

It's not like it's a hundred square candy bar. What are there? Eight, nine? Yeah. It's saying either, like, either take one or half the bar. See how it goes I had such Kind of a microdose with shrooms when you do it right

Just sort of like brightens your senses And gives you the lightest kind of a buzzy feeling Oh yeah And also makes you laugh I had a permanent smile I was just really It was a little bit of a bummer Like when you're that far back

Nobody dances And that's a dance band for sure Well that's all seats I wish they had, like, so the night before, they played a different Greek theater at Berkeley. And Berkeley, the Berkeley Greek has a lawn. That would be ideal. I mean, it's, you know, behind the seats. It's like, remember in Mansfield, Mass, what's the name of that place, that opened when we were in college.

But that or Saratoga, SPAC, all the dead shows, like you just want, you know, you can be in the seats up front if you want, but no one wanted that. He wanted to be, like, wandering on the grass. So what's going on? Your dad's here? So he arrived yesterday afternoon, right? And so he's here for a week. And, you know, when they get that old, he's 85 now. When they get that old, and it's basically it's meal to meal.

That's what's going on. Yeah. And I'm going to try to take him in the swimming pool because he has one in Florida. And I want him to move more and stuff. Anyway. But so I take him to lunch today because he's out. saying that Laura's the first couple of days before he comes over here. And so Kate, my niece, his granddaughter, joins us, the three of us at lunch.

And I go, so how's the jet lag from here? And he's like, well, he goes, it was, let's see, he goes, I guess it was all right the first night. And then, and Kate goes, Grandpa, you've been here one night. And I'm like, never. mind dad i got my answer and it's because he got here and took a nap and then he woke up to dinner and then they went to sleep that's hilarious i told you what my mother said when i was back in new york right she she stays in my my sister's basement my her yeah my brother-in-law is a builder

and he built this beautiful apartment downstairs so she's down there and uh it's 10 o'clock in the morning and I opened the door to the basement and I yell down. I said, mom, do you want some eggs? And she goes, yeah, what kind? And I said, scrambled. And she goes, oh, I thought you said cake. Yeah, mom, scrambled cake. She goes, no thanks. I thought you said cake at 10 in the morning. That's how she eats. We went to love. lunch with her in Florida one time and it was one of those days where like, you know, we come to town and actually do things. And so we're like, all right, let's go down to Miami. Let's go see the breakers. Let's go. You know, and so we went out to lunch and she ordered an ice cream. We're

at a fucking Cuban restaurant, won't eat the Cuban food, and orders an ice cream for lunch. And then gets moody an hour and a half later. Starts getting snippy. It's like, well, maybe if you didn't have a fucking sugar crash right now right yeah totally um did you see naked gun i did saw it in new york yeah i you know it was okay i feel like the first half was a lot stronger than the second half yes and they took some chances at times boy i sat through all the trailers the trailers were so painfully on funny while trying to be so funny and I'm like so I was you know and a couple of them had good people in it who you know can like deliver a joke and I really was like is this just getting so soft

like I mean you know especially on the heels of watching Happy Gilmore and I just couldn't believe what made it through takes and in editing and notes and I'm like that really that's that's the one you that's the one you said yep ship it that that's good to go that scene anyway uh but it might be an incredibly unfunny editor and executives in marketing making the trailers that's my hope well yeah you worked in that world that's how you got into show business he used to make trailers for HBO right i mean how much the easiest thing that makes short form stuff funny if you're good but how how much input when you did that did the directors or writers have on what you put out zero but a lot of executives marketing executives had a lot of

the shows had the show could call and say we really don't like these and then you know there would be a conversation and everything not with me but with my bosses and maybe they would do that but generally and even at cbs i would tell cbs hey you know i kind of started in promos like that's great you can help us they did not want that at all yeah because their things thinking about demographics. They want the trailer to hit men 30 to 42 in the Northeast. They've got an agenda for what the content is, not what's funny, but what's going to appeal and get people in the theater. And you give up eventually. You have like at CBS, I remember my sitcom, and you know, the promos are huge because no one knows it exists until those and you want

them to be good so uh they put like a record scratch in one of the jokes and i just almost shit myself and then they put like a zoom like things that literally aren't in the show yeah i just felt sorry i mean at that point i'm just you guys are the least creative i don't even know how you have this job uh i did it i did a show that had a band on stage in new york one night and i did a joke and the drummer gave me a rim shot and I walked over and I fucking yelled at him. I said

you don't fucking rim shot my joke. You're not going to have that attitude at Vinnies near the Jersey Shore. Uncle Vinnies? Yeah. Yeah. They can rim shot you if they want. I think that was a one and done kind of experience. Oh, I thought you were

heading back there. No. Oh. Colleen Curtis came out. Our friend Colleen. Oh, yeah. and uh nice yeah it was good oh and our daughters just hung out in new york a couple nights i was gonna ask you before we started because you just picked up jojo right yeah jojo had a little her first business trip to new york uh for this woman that she's working for now which was very exciting she had like three giant shoe suitcases of stuff to bring and uh they did a photo

shoot and it was like you know really exciting and she stayed in midtown and uh she found the time to hang out with Owen. They went out to dinner a couple times. She went out with a grandmother to dinner. And then she hung out with Sophie. She was down in her apartment. She's like, Dad, you cannot believe how small the rooms are. She said it's like literally the mattress takes up the entire room.

And I think I told this. I literally saw when I was there once, like, Dad, Jenny and Tim, like her uncle and aunt, gave us a saw. I'm like, all right. And like, you have to fix this. And it was the roommate's bed. The door couldn't close

because the corner of the bed, which was as far in the room as you could get it. The corner of the bed prevented the door from opening and closing. So what did you saw? The door of the bed. So the post, I think,

sorry to listeners if I've already told us. The post was in a weird way was the two slats came to the post so the post was actually on the outside in a way or half on the outside of the corner so i took off i removed it i now put the post on the inside then the path anyway and then i had to saw then i had a saw a 45 degree angle yeah which it clears and i'm like if there's if the bed moves at all like after you make the bed yeah it might block the door again you just got to push it back in the corner

But they went out, they saw some jazz. There was some guy at the next table that was given to them bignets. And I'm like, so you guys just eat shit that guys give you from the next table? I don't like that. No. Let's give a shout out, our logo this week. Oh, fuck. Who did this logo?

Somebody write in and tell us who did this logo. I have a feeling it's Jane S. But it's two hot dogs with relish on them. And then you and I. Isn't this adorable? That is adorable. It's us as hot dogs in buns. I thought it was very summery.

It's so summary. Look at that. The song this week from Jeff Snyder. I loved it. Yes. And he was brave. He went with the word irregardless, which is a word, despite how redundant it is. Yeah, rhyming it was the hard part.

Yeah. We need more songs. We got a few in last week. People sent some really good ones. We definitely need to load up on some more if you are artistic or musical or you just want to get started in your musical career. Make us a quick little 30 second song and we'd love to play it. Give you a shout out corrections. Matt and Peoria said Uptown Girl erased one of the greatest love songs of all time, don't go changing, which is what I said.

And he said, or as it's titled, just the way you are. Okay. I've watched episode one. I've got to watch two. Yeah, we're going to get down to one of the Billy Joel. Oh, by the way, have you seen Night Manager? Yeah, the hotel guy in the Middle East? Yeah.

Yeah, I have. But wait a minute. Did you watch the subtitled version that's in Arabic, or did you watch the one with Hugh Lorry in it? Hugh Lorry. Okay, yeah. It's amazing. It's so good. Yeah.

And the woman who plays the girlfriend, she was Princess Die in the crown. Oh, right. She's quite tall. Dude, she's six foot one or two, and she is mesmerizing. I think she might even be taller than that, but go ahead. She's Australian, and she is just dropped dead gorgeous, a great actress, worth watching just to see her. And not afraid of a little nudity, God bless her. The real Princess Die was five.

10. Was she really? Yeah. I'll drink of water. Another correction came from Stephen Blackwood, who said, according to IMDB, Michael Rappaport was not in Do the Right Thing. I hesitate on that. Yeah, he just seemed like he should be, doesn't he? In that pizza scene at the very beginning? Right. John Favreau said, I want to let you know that your village story is a rip-off of a classic Doctor Who episode. In the episode, you were locked in a room with two robots. One robot always lies. The other always tells the truth. The room has two doors. One is rigged to explode when the other safely sets you free. The solution is the same. You go up to either robot and ask, if I was to ask the other robot, which door will safely set me free? What would it say? Then you pick the other door.

Okay, first of all, I was telling that riddle when I was about 14, and Dr. Who, when did Dr. Who come out? I've never seen it. I've never seen it. Oh. But I have a feeling it was before 1976. Well, I don't know. Then it came back and, you know, it was very popular. Oh, all right. Either way. Thank you, John. John's in Maine. I'm very jealous. Elizabeth Debicki or Debicki? Yes, yes.

6-3. No. Wow. And she was a dancer. Both her parents were professional dancers. And then she went to college for dancing, took up theater, and the rest is history. I love it. Nevada Smith says, Bert and Lonnie were not the it couple in the 1970s. They met in 1981 and were married from 88 to 93. Okay. There you go. All right. Who is the it couple in the 70s? Farah and Lee Majors. Yeah. Uh-oh.

Are we going to get fact-checked on that? Other 70s. Well, you got the captain and Toneal. Oh, my God. Yeah, you sure do. Love. Love will keep us together. And then we've got Ryan, who says,

a correction about the song used on episode 275. It is correct. I am Ryan Zimmerman. However, it's by Light on Buildings, which is me. So that's what he likes his music put out under. So thank you, Ryan. For the song. In the future, we will make sure to get it right. Thanks, Light. Tour days coming up. La Jolla, the Comedy Store,

August 29 through 31. These shows will sell out. Get your tickets now before it's too late, Labor Day weekend. Denver at the Comedy Works, September 18th through 20, Connecticut Comics at an Indian casino, September 26th and 27th. Then I'll be in Fairbanks, Alaska, Vegas, Chicago, San Francisco, Hasbrook Heights, New Jersey, December 26th, and 27th. Go to Fitzdog.com, pick up some tickets. Enjoy yourself some live comedy. And now, Mike, are you ready for this? Oh, yes, I am. Okay, this is very exciting. We have an ad, ladies and gentlemen.

It's been eight months since we had advertising on this show. It's been eight months, yes. We got dropped by our agent because he represents, like, literally the five biggest podcasts in the country and didn't want any small ones. So anyway, we got a new agent who's fantastic, who we love. and he has now, we just signed with him recently, and he's got us our first ad. Oh, look at this. And I'm excited that it's Rocket RX because, look, it's...

I'm excited, just physically excited, just hearing the phrase. Well, look, men's sexual health is something we talk about a lot on this show. Sure do. We're very, we're very sexual people. Yes. And rectile dysfunction is something that doesn't rear its ugly head. Sometimes the head does not rear. And so sometimes you need a little help.

And so I'm fine, Mike. All right. I'm fine, but just, you know, as it experiments. It's fun also, by the way. It's fun, but I went through the whole process. The examination is all, you answer a few questions. questions online. And then they're reviewed by a clinician team. They'll see if you're eligible, which is the best medicine for you. And it is inexpensive. You don't wait in line. No in person

appointment. People get a little bit uncomfortable with the in-person appointment for some of these things. People like you, Mike. You think I do? Yeah. Well, the reason I get uncomfortable is because any doctor I see, I have them check my hernia. And so it gets on cut. Their reaction makes me uncomfortable when they're like, sir, this is in your nose and throat. I'm like, ma'am, I just want a thorough exam. Is this evening at the improv in 1993? Yeah.

So, and you'll love it because they deliver it discreetly, discreet packaging right to your door. Yep. Doesn't say it? So I went through this process. It was very simple. And I took the medication that was described. And I'll tell you something, my confidence level on our date night was through the roof. I felt like a champion. You're not referring to you and me. You're referring to Aaron and you? If you want to pretend that that's it, yes. Yeah, I do want to pretend that happened.

So look, if you want longer, stronger, stronger. lasting erections click away it we're going to tell you how in a minute but uh it is uh can i add a real anecdote yeah not anecdote a real um i don't know uh i'm not a loss for words but a real piece of advice i guess yes uh is that one great thing about it that i don't think is discussed enough is you talk about the confidence the confidence of not having to think about it and just knowing it's going to happen is especially if you've eaten and drinking a lot like if you had a big dinner let's say you're like out or you're at a party or you go your date is a dinner and you eat a heavy meal and you have a bottle of wine whatever it is that sometimes is like you're just

feeling so lethargic right and and you got alcohol and you might start thinking like I don't know because I'm not really feeling it like in my brain so am I going to going to feel it in my body. And you do when you do this. It can be physical. It can be mental. You know, I would imagine for some people like they wonder, God, I've got big holes in my calendar in November. We don't have any podcast ads. My hair. Well, whatever. I would imagine some people have thoughts that would keep them from performing it. I'm never going back to Uncle Vinnie's. Two and one dual active treatment like Viagra and Cialis had a baby. So it's 100% online, quick and easy and if you start now it takes two minutes and once you take it it takes 12 minutes whoa

i mean it takes me that long get my pants off these days all right so here's what you're going to do folks you're going to complete a 100% online quick and easy consultation now get a free online prescription from a real u.s clinical team today start now takes two minutes use code papers 30 for 30% off your first order. So you're going to go to Rocket RX and put in papers 30. You're going to get 30% off your first order. You're going to support the show. This is how we keep the show going.

If you're thinking about it, don't think. Do. RocketRX.com. Okay. And then put in papers 30. Let's get back to the front page. You got something to crinkle. I can't crinkle one of my, you heard it here.

Sturgis pieces of paper Yeah, do that All right, here we go Well, we had a nice listener right in Begging us to cover Sturgis So what I do every year is I

We were doing a story on Sturgis The first year we had the podcast And I thought I'm like Oh wow, there's a lot of partying Okay, maybe that's it And then I somehow got into the crime The police blotter Well, you got to explain what Sturgis is

The Sturgis is Motorcycle Rally in Sturgis, North Dakota? North Dakota, hold on, you're very confident. It might be south. No, I'm positive. You don't look it up. It's North Dakota. I'm not going to look it up.

So, and the amount of old people on motorcycles crashing is staggering. Okay, so, all right, we're going to build to Sunday, but these are kind of random because I went to different newspapers. So the tally, though, the tally is, where is it? Sorry, that's still online. There were the DUI, they went down this year. They totaled 119. This is 119 DUIs in a week. And you got to remember, this town is like a single stoplight town.

It's nothing. There were 155 DUIs last year. The misdemeanor drug arrest were 266, felony drug arrest were 104. Whoa. Both of those were also down from the previous year. It's like if Peter Fonda and Jack Nicholson rounded up 160 friends. Yeah. Let's see.

Then it has a non-traffic arrest, 97, 114 traffic-related arrests. Anyway, but let's get to the part that. That's crazy. You love the injuries. It's a little bit of a spoiler, but I'll lead with this. Let's just say the wildlife population is thriving in that part of the country before this week. Here we go. So on Saturday at 6.46 p.m., Harley Davidson motorcycle traveling eastbound struck a deer.

Okay, that's seven. Okay, here we go. 949. Oh, wait, that starts Sunday. that's a great one we hold on Tuesday 1114 there Tuesday here they are in a row 1114 1203 that's us in an hour 12 12 12 12 12 29 234 all wipeouts on a Tuesday mostly in the morning all let me get some here this is when they're sharp this is before the heavy drinking has started and I love the language they use to describe the

accident so at 934 a.m. on Wednesday a.m. on Wednesday a 22 23 Harley-Davidson motorcycle while traveling south on 385. It was attempting to make a left-hand turn and was struck by another motorcycle traveling northbound on the highway, right? And they become separated from their motorcycles. Yeah. That's the terminology. But as I read these, picture it, it's like gnats.

Like, it's like they're everywhere. They're running into each other. They're running into cars. They're running into screens on their own. 10.14 a.m. Wednesday. Harley Davidson traveling northbound failed to negotiate a curve. The driver and passenger became separated from the motorcycle. That's like calling an abortion, like the mother and the baby were separated. At 3.30 was, yes, Wednesday. Harley Davidson and a victory motorcycle were traveling southbound. And Antelope ran out in front of the victory

motorcycle causing the driver to stop the Harley Davidson was unable to avoid collision and struck the victory motorcycle from behind. Oh, no. They didn't hit the, what was it, an elk? Antelope. They didn't hit the anelope, did they?

It seems like they didn't. Keep that in mind. On Wednesday, an hour later, Harley Davidson traveling westbound failed to negotiate a curve, left the roadway, and hit an embankment. The driver and passenger were separated from the motorcycle. Two hours later, Harley Davidson traveling eastbound, failed to negotiate a curve,

entered into the south ditch. The driver was separated from the motorcycle. 26 minutes later, at 2021 Indian motorcycle was traveling eastbound, failed to negotiate a curve, left the roadway, entered the north ditch, driver and passenger separated from the motorcycle. Okay, this goes on for 8.30 a.m. I wonder what else got separated in Sturge? this weekend. A lot of people from their money, a lot of people from their freedom. Okay, you ready? 1033 Thursday. Harley Davidson's traveling southbound. And remember the antelope

that wasn't struck? Struck an antelope. There it is. The driver and passenger were thrown from the motorcycle. The antelope was separated from this earth. Let's see here. An hour later, I negotiated a curve left the roadway. That's another phrase. Yeah. The motorcyclist left the roadway. Yeah. It's almost like euphemisms.

Yamaha motorcycle was traveling westbound, lost control, driver became separate. Okay. So this is what I want to get to, though. Sunday. Here's Sunday. Not a girls were separated from their virginity. I only separated them, and I don't have to read them. They all read the same way.

Here's another one. Motorcycle struck an analope. That's another separate. one now because we're in Sunday so here we go 1227 this guy anyway I don't have to read the whole description 1227 total wipeout two motorcycles a.m. or p.m. we're in the early afternoon 1227 18 minutes later that's the struck an antelope total wipeout four minutes later uh Harley Davidson traveling southbound driver lost control separated from the One hour after that, a victory motorcycle traffic southbound struck a deer.

Motorcycle tipped and slid off the road roadway. Again, separation. 29 minutes later, at 210, an Indian motorcycle was traveling southbound cross the road and entered the north ditch striking some rocks. This wait for it. The driver was separated from the motorcycle, but the motorcycle traveled back out onto the northbound lanes and a Harley Davidson smashed into it like it's it's nuts all right I'm going to solicit this right now from our listeners if somebody would like to go to

Sturgis with a video camera next year we will pay for you to fly in and stay at a hotel and just send us footage find the accidents how many tow trucks do they have in Sturgis Because how do you possibly tow this many motorcycles when you're a small town? They must bring them in from neighboring towns. I think you just need like kind of a crane on the back of your tow truck that just has like five arms because you can just pick the bikes up by a cable. You don't have to worry about it. They're already totaled. And then just bring them, bring them in.

It would be like a dream catcher. It would look like that. So give me mind this is Sunday. There was one, then 18 minutes there were four later. hour later, 20 minutes later. So 29 minutes later, we had that crazy accident. 14 minutes after that one, Harley Davidson traveling eastbound in the right lane, passenger entered, and two motorcycles traveling in the middle hit each other. And it struck the side of the motorcycle, motorcycle left. All right. Look, Mike, you're on a roll, and this is all really great, but we get it.

Okay. I'm not even going to read you details. I'm still in, we're only at, 2.24 p.m. I'm just going to read you the time in between. Nine minutes later, 26 minutes later, one minute later, 37 minutes later. Everything I just read you, we're only at 3.37 p.m. on Sunday. One minute later, three minutes later, 59 minutes later, 45 minutes later, it's finally evening. It's 625 on Sunday when this guy got separated from his motorcycle. But like, what is the hospital like? Do they set up triage tents? I mean, this is insane the amount of like, you know,

stitches and broken bones. Almost all not wearing a helmet. Sadly, four fatalities. Yeah. It's not, it's like, that's not to joke about it. It is not a good scene down there. We should send you up there with your little moped. I got a, I got a motor.

I'm not going to call it a hog, but I got legit motorcycle. You're going to take over my scooter. Tell me up the engine on your motorcycle. It's a 400. There you go. It's light and nimble. It's a city bike. There you go.

All right. We'll come back to that story next week to find out the other crashes that happened. But stay out of Sturgis. Stay out of North Dakota entirely. All right. Next story. Goodbye, gentle parenting and hello F around and find out parenting. Carla Dillon tried lots of ways to discipline her rambunctious 13-year-old,

including making him write the same sentence a hundred times. Did not work with me. That's all I did in high school and middle school. But when he sprayed her with a water gun at a campground after she asked him not to, she saw only one option. Kill him. Now, she threw him in the pond, clothes and all. Fantastic.

With his phone in his pocket, probably. Yeah. Fafo, that's the abbreviation for FF around and FAA. find out is based on the idea that parents can ask and warn, but if a child breaks the rules, mom and dad aren't standing in the way of the repercussions. Won't bring your raincoat, won't walk home in the, oh, sorry, won't bring your raincoat, you're going to walk home in the downpour. Didn't feel like having lasagna for dinner? Survive until breakfast. Left your toy on the floor again, go find it in the trash under the lasagna, you bastard. Parenting that's light

on discipline has dominated the culture in recent decades. But, Critics blame the approach for some Gen Z problems in adulthood. The site surveys that the site surveys. They cite surveys. I can't read, man. They cite surveys that show young adults struggling with workplace relationships. And was it because their parents never told them no? And they suffer from depression and anxiety.

Was it because their parents refereed all their problems? Interesting. I mean, look, you and I are in the, the pocket of that kind of parenting. We grew up in, you know, our kids. I mean, I sent my kids to public schools on purpose to try to avoid some of this. And I certainly was, I didn't want to be the parent,

my parents were, because they hit me pretty regularly. And that was bad. And I never hit my kids. But I got close. I got close. Your parents, your parents were just, find out parents like exactly you didn't even have to have around your dad is like time to find out because I'm in that mood I think it was more like fico find find find out and get knocked

out but I remember like this is my favorite story about Joja this defines her personality perfectly she's the most obstinate she's great and I love her but she's stubborn so we go to this pool remember the Oakwood's apartments where we used to all sneak in it was It was like this corporate apartments, and they had a beautiful pool and a hot tub and tennis courts. You had a birthday party there one year, even though we did not reside there, and it was against all the rules. Right. I think I had my 30th birthday party there, and maybe it was my 40th, and with like 50 people. And so we go there, and everybody's sitting around, all our friends, and Jojo is about seven, and she, it loves the water, we'll knock it out of the water.

And so, you know, L.A. in September starts to get pretty cold by five o'clock. Sun's going down. I'm out of the water. You know, I've methodically dried my bathing suit in the sun because I don't want to drive home with a wet baby. And now she won't get out of the water. I said, Jojo, time to go. Let's get out of the water.

And then she swims away from me. So I walk across the other side. I go, Jojo, come on. We're going to go now. Swims away from me again with a smile. Yeah. And then I start, then I fall into the traps. So they go, come on, we'll get an ice cream on the way home.

If you come now, we'll get it. And now people are starting to pay attention. Now everybody's like, you know, okay, what's going on? Especially because you're clapping at her like she's an animal. Come on. Come home and you're not getting any dessert. Then it turns into the threat. The carrot didn't work.

Now we're going with the stick. And nothing. And now everybody, phones are out. People are videotaping and people are laughing because they know what's next. I had to jump in the pool to get her out. And we get out. and now I'm freezing and I dry off and then she reaches for a towel and I pull the towel away from her and we're parked about a block away

and I make her walk wet and cold to the car and then we get to the car and I was like all right that's enough punishment I open the door she goes to get in and I hand her the towel and she pushes it back towards me and it gets in the car and sits down wet and cold and I just thought I am fucked this is only going to get worse it was like that scene an apocalypse now where remember they were given vaccinations to the kids in the village and so they would chop the kids arms off when where they were vaccinated and that's when marlin brando famously said the horror that's what it felt like I felt like brando at that moment but we all have that memory you and i too of course of like pushing it you get your last warning

then the parents after you and you just turn around and book it and part of you's laughing but part of you is like my arm is about to get grabbed so hard yeah but that was the deal you knew the deal yeah yeah um yeah my kid boy so we both did a good job because they were in a culture in Los Angeles, in the early 2000s, where parents did not want to say no and stuff, but my kids were flabbergasted when they heard the word yes in my house. It was the opposite. I was a house full of nose. And then there would be occasional yeses. And they were like, oh, my God. Yeah. But I feel like you and Liz, even though you guys got divorced, I feel like you guys were always on the same page with your parenting.

We were. We were. We were. We had, I mean, I think, and same with you. Like, I think we also knew we had some good eggs. You know what I mean? Like, I think a lot of that, though, is that admixture. And I love your kids.

They went to very crunchy Westside schools, but they went into a Spanish immersion school, which means many of their classmates had Spanish, you know, Mexican families. the Mexican families could give a fucking shit in the best way about this don't say no to your kids like they are so real world centered that there are the world has a lot of nose in it and especially in Mexican culture in America

well and also I mean it's just amazing when you see how close the families are and how respectful the kids are not just of their parents but other adults Like, it's kind of the best environment you can raise your kids in because I can't be that consistent. Like, it's a community that raises the kids when you're Latino in L.A. You know, you don't have nannies. You are the nanny and you're coming home to your kid who's being watched by somebody else sometimes.

And everybody is part of the team. It is so family-centered. Yeah. What was I going to say? Oh, I had a little story about that. I lost it. The other, the other man. One of the, this is so weird, but you ever have memories from childhood that stay with you and you go, this is not seemingly significant and yet it's like etched in my psyche?

Yeah. And we had this time. Before you go on, it wasn't your fault, Greg. It wasn't your fault. Look, I was a good looking kid. Yeah. So we went to the Shannon's house one day on our, I was little. I had a bicycle, but I was probably only six at the most.

And the Shannon's house was kind of far away. So I went with my brother, and then my parents came, this is before cell phones, and they drove up to say, hey, we're going to go to the golf driving range. Let's all go. I said, great. And then I started riding my bike home, but I knew they were coming behind me in the station wagon. So I pulled my bike over to the side of the road, and I waited for them, and I flagged them down, and I asked, I told them I was. tired and I wanted to put my bike in the car and get a ride. My father told me to get back on the bike, drove behind me the whole ride home. Pushing you, bombing. Brought me to the driving

range with my brother and sister and made me sit on the bench and not hit golf balls and watch everybody else. And I don't, all right, not that big a deal. That had such a fucking profound influence on me. I just remember feeling so like I was a child who is looking to be taken care of and I was punished. I think that's what it was. Right. Yeah. I was like, help me. Can you help me? I'm tired and I'm little and I want you to help me. And I think it made me a very, I think that type of parenting made me very independent, but it made me also not be able to ask people for things that much right uh right and that relying and that part of that is a vulnerability also you become less vulnerable because you you don't think that anything outside of you can help you right but jojo

just found out why she did not get the towel that day she just learned why she did not get to tell that day i mean did was that too do you think that's too far what i did no you're also in the heat of the moment and it's not that bad i mean So I asked Olivia recently, I'm like, do you remember that time when I grab, she's like, when you grab my arm really hard? Yes, I do. Like, she finished my sentence. Yeah, yeah. But what I was going to say, this is one little indicator of how family oriented, especially the Mexican American population is in Los Angeles.

Remember we went up to Magic Mountain and we gained the system. We got there earlier. We went during the week also. But it is... Back when you could get two for one. They were trying to get people up there. There was all kinds of passes you could use. But it is normally overrun.

There are so many people that... And it's a huge Mexican-American population that go there, probably because a lot of it's the geography of where it is. So anyway, I'm where they're talking and we're having a time of our lives that day, running to every roller coaster. And I talked to a guy that I'm like, what are your slowest days? He's like, oh, easily the slowest day here is Mother's Day. I'm like, really?

He's like, yeah, because all the Mexican families, there is no getting out of that. There is no, and there's the respect from the mom to the grandmother. They are not getting here at best way late in the day. Right, right. There's brunches and all that. So that was a very interesting point. God, there's so many racist jokes I could make right now. but let's move on to the next story.

No, let's move on. Here it is. Oh, so I came across this story, and then I was like, oh, my God, that's juicy. How did we not, you know, how did I not see that this week? It turns out it's a 2017 story before we had a podcast. So we never did this story. But I thought it was so, such an interesting topic. It's almost like an ethical question, which we'll do after.

But here it is. A Texas restaurant was criticized for its bathroom signs. It had the men's room and the law. ladies room and what it did in 2017. It was Doty's Cajun Bar and Grill in Allen, which is roughly 25 miles north of Dallas. It used Bruce Jenner with his gold medals on the men's door and Caitlin Jenner on the cover of the magazine that she came out on or, you know, like debuted Caitlin Jenner on on the woman's bathroom. That's amazing. And they got so much. hell for it. And I'm wondering, I understand that if you're making light of it and it's a very

painful area and subject. Now, people brought that to the restaurant's attention and they're like, that is not at all like what we had in mind. We thought this was creative and funny. And I guess we also thought that this is actually very literally calling her a woman, which is we think appropriate and but you know anyway that's why I think it's an interesting issue because I can see both sides well when I was at Yankee Stadium and I'll post these pictures uh I was but they are making it a joke I get it I was at Yankee Stadium a couple weeks ago and there's this like Irish loud ass bar across the street that everybody goes to before the game and it's just sunburn Irish people from the Bronx and Dominicans and it's like this mix of New York

Anyway, the bathroom, the men's room says pitchers, and it has a pitcher on it, and the women's room says catchers, and then there's another bathroom that says switch hitters. No. Yes, yes. Oh, man. I thought you were going to say the men's room had a Yankees logo, and the women's room had a Metsail logo. That would be great. That would be great.

It is so funny when you think about these fucking bathrooms, like, I just thought about it yesterday when I went into that bathroom at golf course. Like, they're unisex, and I just thought, well, like, who is going into a woman's room? Like, if you're a man going into a women's room, all right, you're already in violation of something. But is a man going to attack a woman in a woman's room? Like a cross-dressing man? Is he going to sexually... And now I got us off the algorithm.

Is he going to assault a woman? Is the door, is the sign on the door stopping him from committing that atrocious act? I get beat up by men in the men's room when I sit down to pee on the urinal. Yes. They, I don't know what it is about it, man. It sends them off. Well, I think it's because you don't tuck your penis back and you're peeing in the middle of the floor. I'm also, you know, my hands are on my knees.

It's an awkward position, and then there's a guy on my left and right, and I'm kind of looking at them. All right, we're off the algorithm. We made it 55 minutes. I think I'm still safe. Maybe, can I still be on the algorithm? All right. Ethical question, here it is. Okay.

Your turn. All right, ethical question of the week. You are you making this up? No, I read it on it. It was like a TikTok video. You are offered 50,000. thousand dollars cash but in order to receive it okay the person that you hate the worst in the world or the most in the world gets a hundred thousand dollars do you take the fifty thousand dollars

oh man i have to try to make this real um i don't think you have any when you hate that much you're not really a hateful person i'm not uh yeah i mean no i mean i mean i I can spin some wheels spending negative energy on someone, but it doesn't last somehow, despite being Irish, it doesn't last forever. But I think I would because, I don't know, it doesn't work, but part of me is like, fuck them. Yes, they did get that money. I'd like it if they knew it came from me.

but anyway I'm getting 50 Maybe that's part of the healing Part of you know they say anger is like You know there's a million ways this has been phrased But it's like carrying a hot stone around Waiting to throw it at someone And you're burning yourself the whole time

So in a way maybe this is part of that letting go Like yeah you've actually done them An incredible solid But you've separated it You haven't tied your 50 grand Or you're like you're to me I'm just taking my 50 grand Also if you hate to

person, they're probably a really big douchebag. And one thing I've seen in life is give a douchebag a large amount of money and horrible things happen. Yes. You know, they're going to buy drugs or they're going to think they have more than they have and actually get more in debt than they were before they got the hundred grand. Yeah. They're going to forget to pay taxes on it and go to jail. Yeah, give them the hundred. Right. Or it's like a, it's like Florida men who, uh, Who win the lottery. All right. Let's go to entertainment.

Let's go to entertainment. Here we go. Perhaps the most prominent of the been-throughs was Kennedy. I don't know what that means. Anyway, RFK, the Health and Human Services Secretary in the Trump administration, was busted sexting with New York reporter Olivia Nuzzi. Nuzzi parted ways with the magazine after she was put on leave. Kennedy was in the doghouse.

Him and his wife, Cheryl Hines, barely spoke for weeks. Hines said she was embarrassed because he got caught. This is the kind of woman that marries a Kennedy. She's embarrassed that he got caught. She said, quote, there is no end. And if you get caught into responding to her being asked about it, then it drags you into low vibrations. And the trick is to stay in high vibrations.

And even when there's all this chaos, accusation, vilification going on around you, ultimately the outcome is all in God's hands. And our job is to try to stay peaceful and love each other and our families and be good examples. I think that, I think Olivia Nuzzi had some high vibrations going on when RFK was working that dildo on her.

I think high vibrations is a side of, of vaccines. Oh, right. Yeah, so she's against them. Yeah. Well. How is she staying in this picture? She said she has a friendship now with Donald Trump.

Who? Heinz? Yeah. I mean, it's interesting. Look, what do we know? Just because she's a Hollywood actress doesn't mean she's liberal. Maybe she was always sort of, you know, in the middle. I'm actually not being general at all.

Like, what is she doing, staying with a right leaning? The stuff that Kennedy has said is dangerous, full on dangerous. And then some of the actions they're doing are just patently, objectively hurting people. Yes. And they're getting rid of all the, they're literally burning all the science that would support anything that's that promotes vaccinations. You know, and not, we're not just talking about COVID. We're talking about polio, you know, measles. Well, we'll see.

We'll see what happens. All right. And I'm not ruling out. I'm not even talking about vaccines. I literally am not. I'm talking about policy. Policy he's changing that they, every 100 out of 100 scientists will tell you that is hurting rather than helping and people will die.

Yeah. Anyway, aye, aye, aye, aye. Let's make America, Florida. Let's get to a happy place called Florida. So, Florida, man, all right, this is the photo I was trying to get in here, and I guess it's protected, because it's on my desktop. It won't let me put in the document. Anyway, Florida man catches 87 invasive pythons in a month and was awarded $1,000, which is low through the state incentive program. Aaron Mann clinched the monthly prize.

as part of South Florida Water Management District's Python Elimination Program, which encourages skilled Sunshine State residents to capture and kill as many of the invasive Burmese pythons as possible. Last year's challenge winner only removed 20, but he brought home a $10,000 reward. Additionally, specialized python removal agents

are paid 50 for each snake they secure with an extra $25. bucks thrown in for every foot on snakes stretching longer than the average four feet. The picture I wanted to put in there was of the 19 foot python, which would be worth $425 bucks under the new program. Plus the meat that you can sell to the Korean markets. Well, I think a lot of that meat's now going to go to the prison, which is right there. Oh, right.

Well, I have to say, like, this new government is doing an amazing. job of incentivizing rednecks to basically work for them, like using their natural redneck energy. Like, it used to be a government job. And now we're just tapping into, like, tackle immigrants, catch snakes, invade the capital. Up the price. Do you want every snake out of the Everglades up that price? You don't think these boys are going to get them? Also, like, it's probably fun, hunting pythons.

I don't know, man. They're in there at night and stuff. They also had a program. I didn't put it in there. They made robotic rabbits that went in and they would attract. And they had a meter. They would attract the pythons. Sometimes they would eat them, but that was a way to find them.

Here's my question to you. This technology has to exist already. But if you don't think there's a world where some guy on a lawn right at the shores of the Everglades swamp is going to have 20 drones super high-tech drones he's going to long boom one goes up two goes up three they then scan they have their heat sensor with a map that can immediately show you a snake that is over eight feet long you know and absolutely destroy it or do anything you want with it identify it disable it land on it whatever you want to do but aren't we that that can happen right now invasive species man that's why they call them invasive species they're really fucked they get embedded man

they are like in the woods they're on the marshes they're on the edges they're you know um once they're in it's really fucking hard to get them out this drone would take one piece of video and it would be like there's 16 snakes that are over eight feet right there yeah well it's kind of like fishermen are using drones to take their lines out well they're using drones on the border now to find people that are running across the border it's all coming to the mechanical hound but it's going to be a mechanical bird that's what it's going to be another job lost let's make america texas all right texas man all right this is it's not i mean it's not a light story unfortunately but from what I could tell on everything I read,

he has had no physical contact with anybody. Texas man wearing nothing but a diaper-ass young girls for a change. Now, don't misread that, not change, for a change. A change. Yeah. Wesley Wade Worrell, WWW, was arrested in Tyler on August 7th on charges of criminal solicitation of a minor and criminal trespass. The children reported that World got out of his truck wearing only a diaper before yelling

as inappropriate request to the girls. And arrest affidavit describes... Wait, are they sure that he wasn't just from India? Wait, why? You ever see Gandhi? You ever see pictures of Gandhi? Okay. By the way, why did Gandhi wear a diaper if he was on a hunger strike?

Here we are back at evening at the improv, 1999. You got it. Ever notice? An arrest affidavit described Whirl's pattern. Oh, they described him as it as a pattern of predatory conduct. The document says Whirl has a decades-long record of charges relating to wearing a diaper. It fell out of there. That was my favorite part of the line.

So he's not new to the diaper game. No. It's interesting. It is what's interesting is that. you know little girls don't want to do this they play with their dolls they are constantly changing diapers this is just a big giant fun diaper put them to bed they can put them to sleep after this cuddle up with them it's a unique angle i'm going to give wesley that uh it's um yeah usually it's like using a puppy right candy something to entice them he thought

Being naked, not only wearing a diaper, but saying it's full. Yeah. That's part of this. Now, they don't say whether it's an actual baby diaper where it's barely covering. I mean, a baby diaper would probably just cover, you know, his genitals. Or did he custom make a large diaper with pins on the sides? Yeah, there are some big babies, but not that big. well you remember the baby and the bugs bunny cartoons

what was his name baby something oh yeah I forget the name the giant baby finster baby maybe maybe it was finster oh my god did I just pull that out nice call is it I can't remember anything and I remember that all right let's get down to international all right here's your crinkle the Colombian Navy on Wednesday announced

its first seizure of an unmanned narcos equipped with the Starlink antenna off its Caribbean coast. The semi-submersive vehicle was not carrying drugs, but the Colombian Navy and Western Security Forces told us that they believed it was a trial run by a cocaine trafficking cartel. Quote, it was being tested and was empty, a naval spokeswoman confirmed to AFP. Yeah, boss, we checked. No crew, no drugs.

Weird. It's weird. It's weird, huh? Yeah. Meanwhile, back in the Navy shift, there's like six guys with Columbia neckties being tortured by Navy guys that are coked out of their minds. We're in gold chains. I love this. Yeah, they're going to, that's also going to be drones. She was empty, Captain. She was empty. Nothing here. Nothing to see here. Dude, the criminals are always going to be one step ahead in technology. Whatever we. think of they are using that shit they you know the drones that they're using to you know get you think about how easy it is to you don't they're not detecting planes you can get a drone and carry a fucking kilo

a coke across the border easily yeah I don't know how they're going to defend against drones also drones can carry people across the border yep good luck with the wall you're still thinking like uh 1940 yeah it's like us building

We build these aircraft carriers. It takes 10 years from development until completion of an aircraft carrier. And by then they say like all the technology is obsolete. I mean, I'm not that imaginative. I really am not that imaginative. I would be writing much more make-believe stuff. But can you see, forget your wall. Can't you see the border?

let's say it was the border between Mexico and America. That border, every third of a mile, will have a pole basically with a nest. And in that nest is sitting a drone. It's very much like, you know, when they build the artificial nest for like giant eagles or condors. It's going to be a drone nest. And that drone just watches.

That's what it does. And as soon as it sees, it doesn't matter if it's night. day because it sees no matter what. And then a third of a mile, eventually it'll get to a mile and eventually get to 50 miles. It will just watch. And as soon as there's anything, it goes and investigates. That's your wall. Right. Well, I think the problem is the manpower that then it requires to go arrest people. I think they know a lot of times right where they're coming in and they just don't have them.

Well, maybe now they will, but I don't think anybody's coming across the border anymore. I think that, I think that people are like, why the fuck would I go? Why would I think in what country that's throwing everybody out? But don't forget, the drone can do whatever. The drone can drop a net. The drone can gas them. The drone can, of course, kill them. Jesus Christ.

Yeah. Take it easy there. The drone can drop like banana peels and make it slippery. They're never going to get in the country. Let's go to science. Do we have to? All right. here we go.

The Trump administration is accelerating plans to place a nuclear reactor on the moon. We are going to blow up the moon. The reactor will launch to the moon by 2030. It's an ambitious target that has some scientific community concerned about high costs and potential unrealistic schedule. The plan follows the U.S. goal to return astronauts to the moon and be a leader in space exploration

as China and Russia also aimed to use. used nuclear power on the moon by the end of the decade. Duffy said during a press conference on Tuesday that using a nuclear energy as a power source on the moon is necessary to sustain life there. Now, like, who owns the moon? Like, if Russia and China and us are all putting shit up there, like, is it just neutral? Will it be eventually claimed by a sovereign nation? And it'll become like, Like what we have to Hawaii? Is that going to be our next, like, Pacific Island? Wait, so this country, America puts all its homeless up there.

Now the homeless have nukes. Oh, right. Right. Yeah. By the way, blowing up the moon was a very, very funny Mr. show sketch. It was also a blues traveler album name. Blowing up the moon? Blow up the moon.

Really? I also, my phone is rich with the novel. here and info it was baby face finster oh there you go oh my god i remember the little guy like those little mafia sort of um storylines and bugs bunny were great yeah i know because you have to remember that bugs bunny probably started in what like the 1930s when there was like there was like prohibition gangsters you think it was later than that oh i do yeah they probably 50s and it's chuck right what's his name um but uh yeah i would say it started in 1940 that's going to be my guess all right i'm going in i'm going to fact check you live in the meantime it's like oh look it's a full moon tonight

oh except for that chunk taken out of the side with that mushroom cloud next to it chuck jones here we go buggy chuck jones created in the 30s thank you but that was before Chuck Jones, but Mel Blanc. Mel Blanc, the famous Mel Blanc, the greatest voiceover guy in history. Tex Avery's A Wild Hair was 1940. That's when bugs arrived as bugs, they say was 1940.

All right, let's do letters to the editor. Okay, let's do it. Here we go. This is from Matt Turfey. He said, I think we skipped this day in history. Oh, it's coming up. Sorry.

Episode 274 came out on July 27th. Episode 275 came out on August 10th. Did we skip a whole week and it was never acknowledged Sunday, August 3rd? It is an amazing free podcast, hard to complain about. We got to get better about telling people when we're going to take a week off. I think sometimes because we don't realize we're going to until it's that week. That is what happened. We realized at the end.

But what someone suggested, which is very simple and easy, is when we do know why wouldn't we put out a YouTube we should put out a vintage one with a screen that just says gone this week. Please enjoy this. We'll be back next week. That's good. And also I could put it out on social media

that we have no show this week, you know. Yeah, yeah. All right. And then he said on July 27th, you said, watch the mortician movie. Go watch it. We will discuss it next week. Went, watched it. As instructed,

discussed a reference to get on Sunday papers. Remains an amazing podcast. All right. I love it, Matt. Well, I mean, you saw all of it? I did. Dude. All right. Well, spoiler for, for, for, for probably. We warned you. We told you to watch it. For a minute, we're going to talk about the mortician on HBO. It, um, the volume. The, it was like false peak after fall. speak you were blown away at the volume of bodies he was processing that's what you got to explain the movie well i guess i'm i guess i thought the people that haven't seen it went away and i'm talking to the people that have seen it but no i think we come out and say it was about a guy who was a crooked

mortician and you're supposed to burn one body at a time so that you can scrape up the ashes put him in an urn and give it to the family to go sprinkle over martha's vineyard this guy it was like the holocaust it's the most respectable old school uh funeral home and operation in pasadena generation after generation or at least two generations had gotten like you know grandma was and we have three generations yeah yeah all of that stuff and boy when now when you're getting the ashes it could be from 30 people yeah he would he would stuff them in and every he he undercut all his competition. People were charging like 500 bucks for a cremation to get your ashes and he was

charging like 110 and he was doing thousands and but he wasn't making his money on that. What he was making money on was the gold fillings and the teeth. Oh, the rings? Yeah. Everything. Oh, no. Organs. And then he was harvesting organs. Harvesting organs and sending them to respectable programs that needed them

he also would break arms and legs to fit them into the incinerator jamming them all in there anyway go watch the mortician there we go Matt we've talked about it and by the way very lucrative line of work to go into my favorite detail

though and it's morbid as hell was he then had a move he was polluting the air so much and making such so anyway he got investigating he did not pause. He went out to a factory in the valley and towards the desert. And he got a big room there. He then ramped up how many bodies at a time he was incinerating. A nearby factory, like next door, it was fishy, all this smoke. They do it in night a lot. This guy was a former

servicemen who fought in World War II. Oh, right. He literally goes one day. I know that smell. I, because he smelled burning bodies in concentration camps. Right, right. What the F.

All right, let's cheer up. Hard to, I got to tell you. All right, wait, how about this day in history? Yeah, let's do it. All right, I got to tell you in advance. Real slim pickings. Oh, okay, nothing happened. It's late August.

No, a lot of it's World War II. You would get it, all that stuff. 1945. Yeah, exactly. So let me see which ones I landed on. It's going to be annoying. I'm sorry, because I have to go to like five different days. Jesus.

I mean, would you know when Coco Chanel was born? Coco Chanel was born. Give her, take 20 years. When was Coco Chanel born? 1924. 1880. really wow I know that makes her in her late 30s when she started

sucking Nazis dicks oh okay let's see what out that should get me back on the algorithm good Lord man two Nazi stories in a row okay when do you think Jerry Lewis died give her take three years

Jerry Lewis who hosted the telethon with my father died in 91 years old my father was the uh host of the jerry lewis telethon from new york every city or some of the big cities had a local broadcast for 15 minutes of the hour so i know jerry lewis i met jerry lewis you sir are no no um he was big a back when the movie theaters had live entertainment to open for the theaters that was him and uh dean martin's big gig That would have been in the 1950s, and he was young. So I think he was probably born in 1934. Great work.

I asked you when he died. 1997. 2017. Shit. I don't even know what trip you just went on during all that. And I also told you he was 91. Okay, we got, oh, football was created. NFL, the NFL, not football, NFL.

By the way, wait, just for the record, I said 1934, and he was 97? 91. So I was off by two years. Well, no, it's actually worse than that. You couldn't even do your own math. At a meeting in Canton, Ohio, the NFL was formed. uh as the american professional football conference what year did this start give or take 15 years 1915 oh you got that one 1920 nice uh okay we're going to go up here and try to find two more

it's woodstock but i know you know what year that was 1969 summer is 69 you got it pal We're going to go further up here. I did see some. Robert De Niro, Bourne is boring. Okay. George Orwell published Animal Farm on this day, in what year, give or take four years? Animal Farm was talking about the rise of communism in the world, fascism, which really was starting. in the 30s, so I'm going to say

1933. 45. Shit. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. All right, we're going to get one more. One more. Here it comes. God, a lot of...

So much World War II. All right. Well, okay, we're going to end with two sports ones. Okay. The first issue of Sports Illustrated was released. Give or take 10 years. year was the first issue of Sports Illustrated.

1937. No. 1954. Oh. All right. Here comes your math again. American baseball legend Babe Ruth died.

On this day, in what year he was 53? He died in 1948. Did you? You look that up? Yeah.

He died in 1948. Thank you very much. I mean, the late pictures of him, he looks like he's in his 70s. I know. Yeah, I mean, they called him the baby because he had a baby face, but his head looked old. Oh, yeah, yeah. No, and he also looked. He always looked like he was.

It's like the Jackie Gleason thing, you know what I mean? He just looked in charge. I was just going to say Jackie Gleason. Gleason yeah he got that aura okay here we go what do you got let's skip the obituary because nobody at all died now if you have a loved one that died this week please no we don't know them and we're sorry for your loss but it takes a certain something to make it into the obituaries of sunday papers well coming from someone who lost a parent last year i've said if you did lose someone very recently just know that it gets worse. All right, let's go on to the funny. You haven't really, it has not sunk in yet, trust me.

All right. I failed to also put, I mean, we really, we're not good in the summer. I forgot to give you a comic to write captions on last week. So we don't have that, but here's the one for next week. You know the contest. I give you a little cartoon. You write a punchline for it. You send it into Fitzdog Radio at gmail.com. The winner gets a coozy for this week. coming up. It is a gentleman in a three-piece suit walking in the door with a briefcase. He looks, how would you describe his facial expression? Over it? He looks over it. And he's looking straight at the camera, right down the pipe, and now we got the dog humping his leg and looking straight up at his face with a smile on

his face. He's a small dog. He's really kind of humping the ankle more than the leg. Go to town, people. Have some fun. A lot of possibilities there. Let's go to Hagger the Horrible. They are storming a castle. You see Lucky. You see Hager.

You see some soldiers dead on the ground with arrows in them. And coming out the door is a chef with a butcher's knife and some other folks. And Hager goes, the castle is running out of soldiers. they're sending out stable hands and the chef lucky goes they're more desperate than you think and then the final frame is the court jester and he is squirting one of haggar soldiers in the face with one of those squirting flowers that's on his chest um i only put this in because i am fascinated if not obsessed with court jesters like when i think about how low entry how low stakes stand-up comedians are today like kids are doing improv in college and there's classes on how to do stand-up

you can listen to a million podcasts that describe how and there's open mic nights at fucking laundromats like it's just the barrier to entry is is non-existent then you go back to the very first comedians the court jester and if they bomb they die fucking gig also what Furious King is his

like you know the guy at his hand whatever that guy's called let's say his secretary the king's hand the king's hand the king's hand is like I've got a great idea

you are in the worst mood ever I'm going to have basically a clown come in like and and the early the jester must have been dragged he must have been grabbing the doorway resisting being pulled into the room like no

no I'm reading this room no my god the hardest performance of all time and you're doing it like randomly and but from what I seen from old movies like it seems like they were kind of like insult comics they would come in and they would make fun of the king

And that's what he would laugh at because it was so, you know, it was so unbelievable that somebody would come in and roast the king and he'd roast like everybody in the court and, you know, and then he sold his CDs after the show. And pins. It's a big swing making fun of an angry king. Lockhorns, we got Leroy talking to Loretta. In the background, Loretta's mother sits and knits. Leroy goes, what do you mean I never do any? nice for your mother. I'm always willing to drive her to the airport. Nice. Then we got another lockhorn where Loretta's standing on the scale. Leroy's walking away and he says,

the talking scale isn't broken Loretta. It just can't get a word in. That's creative. I don't even know why that's so funny, but it made me laugh. I've seen a lot of talking scale jokes. I didn't not see that one coming. There's one more. Roy has been pulled over by a police officer, and he says to the police officer, how fast was I going? Not fast enough. I don't get it. Like he would have gotten away if he was driving faster. Oh, that is.

Okay, I get it. I like it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. All right. So here's a BC, I think. I mean, it's the guy, Hart, but it's just animals. So there's three frames. the first frame

it looks like an anteater is talking to a snake and he goes and they're looking at two zebras and he goes why do zebras have those stripes and the snake goes to confuse predators and the second he turns to the snake

and he's like interesting and the final frame the anteater now has a placard like a sign hanging around his neck and he's walking by two dinosaurs and the sign has complicated long division on it.

And the dinosaurs are staring at them kind of confused. They're confused. They're confused. Yeah. No one gets hurt. The drawings are attractive to look at. Nothing's too busy. Three divided by the square root of 60 and a half.

Okay. Speaking of attractive to look at. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Look at her. Is it summer? What is that top? It's a teal sleeveless number with a plunging neckline.

Number. on a black velvet skirt that of course is is obscured by a fucking apron that bitch should never don an apron she should have furs on where she's taken out to good restaurants not serving you she yells up the stairs did do you want to did you want to come down and eat your pancakes while they're still hot honey and he's upstairs shaving and his pajama his fucking biceps look kind of big he's got pajama bottoms on He goes, I'm still shaving. Can you bring them up here?

And now she's in the bathroom. He's got shaving cream on his face. And she's feeding him pancakes. She goes, and he goes, you know, pancakes with minty shaving cream aren't half bad. You know, I take it back. If this, I would not allow him to get $100,000. I'd refuse the $50,000. Oh, thank you so much for that.

because I think that would be my $100,000 prize winner. And what would he do with it? He would eat himself to death. He would quit his job because he thinks he's made for life because he's a simpleton, not realizing that $100,000 isn't going to get him through the year. And he would never get a job again because they'd call for a reference and his boss would be like,

he sleeps at the desk, he's incompetent, and then he'd lose Blondie. He'd buy more donut pajamas, maybe a new chair, He'd buy maybe a TV, and then for her, he'd get her, like, food she can cook, like steaks and, you know, flour for more pancakes. Look what I got you, honey. Cooking mix. You love that stuff.

All right, listen, folks, if you want to come see some live comedy, the La Jolla Comedy Store, come on out Labor Day weekend. Mike, anything you want to plug? I guess I could share what I'm watching is the Billy Joel doc I think we're going to talk about it next week I don't think there could be any spoilers in it but you and I have both watched episode one is that where we're at yes and there's two episodes it's nice I've never seen him this vulnerable he's normally always had like a chip on his shoulder and angry yeah maybe driving into a few trees drunk uh sanded some of the edges down but uh i um yeah i mean it's he hasn't even met christie brinkley yet oh my god i can't wait i can't wait i've never heard a document not never

but it's been a while since i heard a documentary get this kind of rave reviews we're going to watch it tonight um by the way we've never talked about have you watched the pee we herman documentary oh that was incredible so great it's pretty incredible yeah i feel like it didn't get it kind of came and went really fast. I have to finish it, meanwhile. It goes on for a while, but he's extraordinary in it. Yeah. Like his live, his interview, his current is, his last interviews.

Yeah. All right. Well, we've done it. And I guess we'll see you guys soon. Take itish. Tag itish. All right. Sunday papers Greg and Mike.

It's the news that you might like. Irregardless it will make you laugh, Sunday Papers' time.