supermegashow - 2 Patriots Podcast Their American Hearts Out | supermegashow - 069
Episode Date: July 2, 2025We're all dolled up to celebrate this "great" country. Follow Matt: @matthwatson Follow Ryan: @elirymagee Follow the show: @supermegashow Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.co...m/adchoices
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Hey everyone, I'm Carlos and I'm the host of JumperJump Podcast.
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That's d-a-z-n dot com slash FIFA. And that's what it would sound like if I was sucking on a big old popsicle on a summer's
day.
Yeah, and it is a hot summer's day today.
It's very hot.
Oh my god it is.
And I wish I was sucking on a popsicle.
Oh my god dude, one of those Otter Pops I was sucking on a popsicle. Oh my god, dude.
One of those Otter Pops, I believe,
is what they're called.
Remember those?
Oh yeah.
The fucking, get them at the grocery store.
The tubes of juice.
Yep.
And then the juice collects at the bottoms.
Go.
Dude.
Fantastic.
It's just syrup.
Syrup is at the end.
It's just pure sugar.
What they use to make snow cone.
It is a snow cone, essentially.
It's the cheap snow cone. Yeah, for those... It's the snow cone at home. Exactly.
Exactly. For those un-Americans, Otter Pops are these. Yeah this is what they are.
They're little tubes of plastic filled with with sugar water. But for the audio
listeners, explain. Yeah yeah and you they're rainbow sugar water. But for the audio listeners, explain. Yeah, and they're rainbow sugar water plastic tubes.
You freeze them in the freezer.
And on a hot summer's day like today,
you pop one out and you just,
like that, it's fucking awesome, dude.
They'd always keep them at the grocery store
in the big things like, you know, the gigantic bins.
They'd always have them like,
where they keep the watermelons,
just fucking dumped in there.
Den hasn't gained that much weight us
That's it's it's a decent gigantic Ben is what I call them huge Ben ever since they moved in New York
He's just been eating pizza and bread. Yeah, it's been bill. It's a bread's a part of Pete's shut the fuck up
It's turns into Cartman
Honestly dude Trump doing Cartman impressions.
Honestly, if you went up on like stage in the state of the union and started doing Cartman impressions, like shitty ones like
Screw you guys. I'm going home
And everyone's standing and cheering that would be awesome
I guess I guess you know in a in a word
I guess yeah, I would be filled with awe if I if I saw that happen I'd be like damn that's happened yes I guess I'm not too
surprised by much going on I'm not either there's a lot of disgusting
depravity that's being unchecked as there always has been in our government
but now it's a lot more another level another level yeah it's they've cranked
up that dial to the red setting.
It was kind of at like the yellow-greenish, more so going into the yellow, but now it's
full red.
Maybe even broken with the coil coming out.
Yeah, exactly.
As rock stars say, turn it up to 11.
They've turned that shit up to 11.
And I know, you might be listening going. Oh brother there
They go with the politics again. Hey, it's the 4th of July episode. We're gonna. Maybe politic here and there
It's just here in there. I mean they're still goofs and gaffs. Don't worry. Yeah, exactly like this
There's a cartoon sound effect Luke put in there
That's right
you know that's fun for the audio listeners and for the video watchers because for whenever the sound effect played it just did a zoom in on
Matt's face. And here is one more sound effect with an uncensored penis for
Patreon. And it's actually it's it's colored green to be like what my penis
would look like right now. So I'll let Luke pick the penis picture he wants to
pick and then we'll edit it. Yeah I'll turn it green. I just asked it because it's supposed to represent my penis in the current moment.
I mean maybe that's something you should like put on your list already. You know, maybe this can be one of your
declarations. Oh, you know. Yeah, yeah. You know the Statue of Liberty, fun fact, was when the French gave it to us,
I know the French were the ones that built it and gave it to us.
I'm still going by the theory that it was a failed Trojan horse.
Filled with Frenchmen and they all suffocate.
They forgot to put a door.
You open up the bottom of the basement and it's a bunch of skeletons wearing
striped black and white shirts with the art art hats and like little thin mustaches on
the skeletons. Baguettes that have like turned into like hard rocks. Holding roses.
Oh my god! They were going that's how they were going to try to invade America
because there's an ocean you know separating how they're not gonna get
over here with ships. Nope. We'd shoot them as soon as they roll up on the horizon.
And the Statue of Liberty is hollow.
They just forgot to fucking...
You can't go up inside that thing.
Yeah, they forgot to put a fucking Trojan horse door.
They stuffed themselves in and then just couldn't get it open, I guess, and then they suffocated.
And just as... I don't know if people are aware of this, you know, this is just a similarity between a statue.
I'm not saying like it's the exact same thing
and I'm not trying to bring any disrespect
to the Statue of Liberty,
because God bless the Statue of Liberty.
I love the Statue of Liberty.
But there is a statue I saw on TikTok real quick
and I would love for Luke to put up a clip.
I'm not even sure if we can show it.
You might have to censor it.
It might have to be another Patreon thing,
but it's a statue of just a woman peeing. What? I'm sure it has some significance, but it's a it's a statue of just a woman peeing what I'm
sure it has some significance but it's is it a where what she's like this and
then pee comes out of let me see if I can fuck yeah dude she's pissing out of
her pussy yeah let me see let me see hold up pissing statue hold on hold on
I would love to see the statue of the woman pissing out of her pussy hole.
Whoa, dude!
Dude, she's got, she's got labia and everything.
Pretty cool, right? We should 100% get that for the office.
That's a lot.
We might have to get one made for the office.
That's alright, that's a business expense. It's a tax a tax write-off about a water fountain where it's like a penis
Ooh, and it's squirting a little bit. It's squirting up
We just got to figure out the right angle because you don't want it to be too powerful with the water pressure and the angle
of the penis erect
Simmered yeah, like a like a raging semi. What about like a water fountain
That's like up near the ceiling and it's like a flaccid penis kind of hanging and you have to get underneath it
And you kind of it you're kind of you're kind of
describing a shower
You're right and
They like a shitty shower, right?
One stream of what could be a series of penises true, you know
You could have like six or seven people or it could be like a penis with something lodged in the urethra so it's doing that pssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss of the sudden he's getting some kind of triple split stream going which uh great uh Activision game name triple split stream yeah that that is a great
activation from Activision from Activision Blizzard split stream I said
split screen like a fucking moron you're not a moron though I don't know what to
do you're a you're a red-blooded right red blood. Yeah, cuz I've seen the veins are blue
So it's got me thinking that
Now there's no
Blood talk about this after the podcast
Just like look at that
How do you explain that?
It doesn't look red to me. Wait, wait, let me see that
Right. Why are why is why are your veins blue?
Bloods red, right? I that right why are why is why are your veins blue blood's red right I have to
you we'll talk about after the podcast okay just interesting that freaks me the
fuck out are you are you okay no I suffer from comment baiting so people put
why actually the veins appear blue those are actually never mind are those the ones
are blue the ones that are taking blood away from the heart or see I'm
commentating again because they'll be like no Matt they're the ones that are
or they'll go Matt you're so right you're so right on that if you're quick
enough and you that just sounds dead I don't want to if you're quick enough and pick your finger, you can see the blue right before the oxygen makes it red. Yeah. Yeah
You have to go real fast
Really really fast
What are they what are those?
they've literally just punch a hole in your thumb when they're doing like the the like pricks when you were a
The when they just like take a little bit it really sharp thick needle, right?
It just they have this little device
that basically they click and it just takes a needle
and goes, it's like a hole punching your finger.
Dude, recently I took a blood test because I was.
At thin, I think.
It is, I was at CVS and I saw they had like,
find out your blood type and I was like,
well I don't know my blood type,
so it's probably a good thing to know
in case I'm ever in a dire situation and I
need some fucking blood pumped into these veins.
Let me guess a positive motherfucker.
Did I tell you? No, I am a positive. Are you? Yeah. Well, I was just saying you're
a, you're a positive mother, mother, mother effort, you know, cause you're,
you always bring so much joy to people's lives,
especially with those blueberries of yours. Yeah. I, I,
I am a positive guy and you wouldn't ever catch me.
I would never be a negative. Yeah. You would never be negative.
You're always a positive person,
but I am a positive and I, uh,
it came with one of those things to prick your finger with and I'm not kidding,
dude. I think for like 15 minutes minutes I kind of just like paced
around just like you had to do it to yourself yeah for the for the little
blood test because you have to take a drop of blood and put it on this like
but your instincts tell you not to do that's why a doctor does it because you
know it was an at-home they don't care about you but it goes against your
instincts to hurt yourself the doctors asking instincts to hurt yourself. The doctor's asking you to
hurt yourself?
Is this the same doctor that played with your belly button?
No, it was an at home test. There was no doctor.
It was just me.
That's why I had to do it to myself.
No doctor told you to take this at home test?
No, I wanted to see what my blood type was.
I was curious.
Oh, so you can just buy this kit from like, CVS?
Yeah, it's tiny. It's like it's like thin
it's like a packet essentially and you just put your blood into these like
circles on a piece of paper and then you drop a little like liquid on it and then
The way it reacts tells you what your blood type is, but I did it and I could not prick my own finger
I asked the old ball and chain if she could do it and she wouldn't do it
She's like I can't no I can't do it I don't want to hurt you
I was like seeing if I could do it maybe like on another part like
yeah well it hurt less if it's on my thigh and then I was like you know what
I'm being a fucking baby I just got to do it and I went ah and I yelled to
brace myself and I just clicked it oh it's not that bad I mean it wasn't
pleasant but of course not that that shit squirted some red everywhere and then I I'm a positive. Do you know
what you are? No I don't remember what I am but I it's like I have the
information I just don't have it on like my memory. I think it's cuz I'm lazy and
it's already in writing somewhere I'm like oh I don't have to remember. You
strike me as a oh, negative type of guy.
That's the best blood there is.
Yeah, but I made mine a pun saying how you're a positive guy, so I can only then
start thinking that you were trying to do the same
in trying to...
I'm not always negative.
No, you're not.
But what I'm saying though is-
Just when I haven't had my coffee. Yeah. Or my video games, or as I like to say, video juegos.
You gotta stop doing that.
Especially on the July 4th week episode.
Right. But I'm also...
I mean, they make up a large workforce and we...what? Just when we like go out to the grocery store and you see a Hispanic, sorry, Latinx person
and you go up to them and you always try to start talking about video juegos, you know,
it could just come off as insensitive.
They're trying to connect.
I'm trying to see.
I know, I know, I know.
But like at a Mexican restaurant, like that last time we went somewhere and you started
doing that and turns out the person was Filipino.
So Filipino.
Sorry, what? Filipino. Filipino? Yeah. Sorry the person
was Pilipinax. I mean that's what Cameron Diaz told me. Yeah. I know you told me to
stop hanging out with Cameron but... Is she is she Pilipinax? No she I mean she
had a Pilipina friend and so she would have Pilipina food
Speaking of Pilipina food. I've been meaning to talk about this on the show Philippines. I saw a
III saw an incredible thing. I stopped at a pet store to get
some cat food and I looked across the
You know a little strip mall I was in and what did I see?
I saw a Pilipinas restaurant called I shit you not it'll be on screen I looked across the, you know, little strip mall I was in, and what did I see?
I saw a Pilipinas restaurant called, I shit you not, it'll be on screen, Penis Food House.
P-I-N-A-S.
Food House.
Penis Food House.
Dude, it's fucking, I showed you the picture, it's fucking awesome.
Like I could not believe it.
And I walked by, and the inside looks awesome, dude.
We gotta go to the Penis Food House.
I would love to just eat at the penis food house.
I don't know what they were thinking with that name.
I mean, I know obviously they just serve cock on a plate.
It's just cock and balls.
Just the cock, just many animal cock and like,
they'll give you like,
I just like the idea of them putting like a flounder
before you but it has a cock and balls.
It's actually, you know, both balls are on the same side.
It doesn't have the actual anatomy of it, but it has like the cock and balls. It's actually, you know, both balls are on the same side. It doesn't have the actual anatomy of it,
but it has like the cock and balls of a man.
Dude, I would love a restaurant
that just serves different animal cock and balls.
We, you know, I guarantee there's not a single one
of those on earth and we could be the first ones.
I'm gonna look up testicle restaurant.
Have you ever eaten testicles?
Uh, no.
I don't know if I have.
I've had a fish, tuna tuna sperm we had that in Japan remember
Yes
Restaurants that serve animal testicles as a delicacy these dishes are often known by other names like Rocky Mountain oysters
I've heard that before Rocky Mountain oysters. Another one says lamb fries. I haven't heard that one
Lay down to say like dude if I ordered lamb fries
I I feel like that'd be a very easy mistake to make because you think you're getting fries with lamb on top and then you get
Testicles do we could okay the the bowl restaurant a Malaysian restaurant in El Monte
California known for its bowl testicle soup the dish needs to be reserved in advance
Delicacy I
Guess cuz it's like, you know, you don't, you're mostly killing
like, you're not killing like the bulls for the most part too. Right? Like bulls are just
used for mating. So like, for them to kill a bull, unless they use bulls for meat. I
always just pictured they're using just like the female cow cow as as the me the you know everything
like all of it I actually yeah I I don't know if they use bulls in like meat
production and stuff are they just for like making more cows I guess they don't
need well they just need to jerk the bull off right and then only true farmers
let let bulls fuck the cows yes and I think we need to do a lot more of that.
I'm just interested to watch. I love watching. To cheer them on.
Have you ever watched videos of animals, have you ever watched videos of like farm animals having sex? Hey, it's Bobbi from the Really Good Podcast.
Sorry to pop in during your episode, but it's worth it.
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It's Hamilton time!
It's Hamilton time. But a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun,
a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun,
a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun,
a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun,
a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun,
a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun,
a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun,
a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun,
a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun,
a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a
dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun, a dun gravy in the USA you know it's a it's it's satire uh-huh yeah I think it's
great satire I'm not being facetious sorry I'm itching my eyeball it itches
and I'm scared of messing up my face paint you didn't so much like I kissed a
Confederate and I liked it I think that you know just given given history and
given the state of things right now you know any kind of song that paints Confederates in a positive light.
Well, that's why it's a surprise. It's like, oh, Confederate.
Oh, true, true.
I'm surprised that I liked it. Well, I guess in the way of, I guess it's not a one-to-one to the themes of the original song, I guess. You really squeezed the syllables in there too, but it works, you know, I kissed a confederate
and I liked it, the taste of his sarsaparilla lips.
He was drinking some sarsaparilla.
Okay, okay, that's good.
No, I'm just imagining like some guy that looks like how you're dressed up right now
kissing a confederate on the lips just oh
Oh my goodness. I mean they're they're probably there has to be some sort of like
actual like happening the happening happening
But we're like during the Confederate War there was like a gay love story between the Union and Confederate like oh yeah absolutely you know like a like a Union soldier and a Confederate soldier
that are madly in love Romeo and Juliet exactly and they're they're torn
because one's on the north one's one's one's on the south side and they just
don't know what to do country or heart just a difference of opinion I guess
people always bring well guess why can't
we just whatever happened to people having a different opinion and you being
okay with it listen all I want is to own another human being that's just a
different opinion from yours now I would not like to be owned personally no that
is off the table no one can own me. However, I would like to own human beings,
and I don't understand why you're being so ignorant just because of a little difference
of opinion.
I mean, sure, we've invented the wheel, and we have animals that could be doing this labor,
but I just like being particularly cruel. I thought you were gonna say I don't know why but you you
like stuttered for a second I thought you're gonna say and we have the wheel
and stop-motion. Well they were nothing but I mean I don't even know in some
cases not even livestock because like a lot of people really respected their livestock. Yeah, it is absolutely batshit insane that such a huge chunk of our country's history was that.
And yeah, it's sad. I don't have any jokes to make.
What? Not a single joke?
Not a single joke. Well, let me see if I can make this funny.
I mean, Luke wrote one on a sheet of paper and gave it to you.
Don't read that one. Don't read that one.
I read it. He told it to me when he was writing it.
He said, hey, how about this one? And he came up with it and...
It seemed like it was on topic.
I don't read it.
I don't know. I'm just probably going to cut that out.
I just know he is. Because he's going, well, if they're not going to read my joke, I'm going to cut that out. I just know he is,
cause he's gonna, well, if they're not gonna read my joke,
I'm gonna cut this whole segment out.
But I started telling a fun fact earlier,
and I didn't finish it,
the Statue of Liberty original color was brown.
Did you know when the French gave it to us,
it was actually, it was like a brown color color and then it's because of the way copper oxidizes when it when it gets
moist and turns green. So that's why it's like turquoise on you. Yes, yes. I was
originally going to do like a more traditional thing and I was I was gonna
do the brown version of the Statue of Liberty. But you know, God bless your, you know, Luke and I had to kind of step in on that one.
We thought it was just kind of more blatantly obvious and we weren't aware of it.
I didn't have, I mean, using just pure black paint was a mistake on my part.
We didn't have brown to be fair.
No. But I do, I thank you for running out
and grabbing me some some turquoise paint from the mall. Yeah. But still I think a bit of an
overreaction on you. Not to say you're racist or insensitive or anything like that, but it could be
misconstrued as you being racist or insensitive. You know, I never even thought that.
You're the racist one for even making that connection.
I never made that connection.
And that's what you would be saying to the person
who would be confronting you for being...
That's what I was saying to the cashier checking me out
when I was buying the green paint
and I was wearing my previous Statue of Liberty face face paint and he made a comment and I said you're the racist one
Actually for even bringing that up and then you threw in a facts don't care about your feelings. I did I
You got to admit the timing of that was pretty good
It was pretty pretty well timed and you hit him with the D's nuts as we were walking out the store
I had a megaphone. So I really rang throughout. The security the mall
security took it which we bought that with company money so the mall security
owes us. We could just sue them. Those aren't cheap too a megaphone.
For emotional damages too. Mm-hmm And potential loss of revenue because we were going to record our podcast with the megaphone
and now we can't, which means we've lost tens and tens of thousands of dollars.
It's a good legal strategy.
I'll just trust you on this one.
I'll handle this, alright?
Why don't you leave the legal stuff up to me.
And leave the songwriting to me.
I'm Hamilton and I'm here to stay.
Is that like the Ghostbusters theme parody?
It's more of a, kind of like a I'm Bad by Michael Jackson. Oh!
I'm Hamilton!
Oh yeah!
I'm Hamilton!
Dude, you know, Lin-Manuel Miranda wants to make a whole fucking Broadway play about Hamilton.
I think that we should make our own version of Hamilton, but it's based on the music of Michael Jackson.
What do you think? Just like how Mamma Mia, you know, it's an entire Broadway production based on the music of Abba.
Mamma Mia, here I go again, Mamma, how could I resist ya?
Is it resist you then forget you, or is it forget you then resist you?
Which one comes first, the chicken or the egg? Oh, I don't fucking know dude. I need I need to brush up on my ABBA
Did you see that Scarlett Johansson was gonna star in the new Jurassic World movie?
bonkers as a Chinese woman and
unfortunately, she didn't get the role but you're thinking of
What is that movie ghost in the shell? Yeah, sorry I got them confused.
Have you seen um, well wait first what was she she she actually was going to star in uh
The New Jurassic World? She is. The trailers are out. She's in it. Along with Chris Pratt? No. Lin-Manuel Miranda? No. Producer from the Lil Wayne album?
Lin-Manuel Miranda?
Oh true, yes, yeah, yeah, yeah, but no, he's not in it.
It is Scar Joe and uh...
Luke?
Scarlett Johansson and Luke Keddie?
You know, it's kind of I do I marvel at
the studio's choice to hire a complete unknown actor. Luke's not an unknown
unknown actor. Yeah yeah. So you know that's always a that's always a risk
with a studio because like how are you gonna sell tickets? Luckily Scar Jo is
there. Yeah and you know she knows Luke very well.
They have a history together.
And Luke didn't even audition, that's the crazy part.
They just stuck and wrote him into the movie
and said, all right, here you go.
Scar Joe went, I got a friend that you should put
in this movie, he'd be perfect for this role.
Mm-hmm.
Because the role is of a guy named,
they named the character Luke as well.
Mm-hmmhmm I think
he's just playing himself as if he were in this universe he or he really he's
not really I've seen I've seen like him practicing lines and stuff it's
literally it just sounds like it's just him most people in his lines are just
I'm Luke hello guys hey Luke here yeah yeah day did someone say Luke yeah it's
about yeah it's Luke o'clock.
Yeah, it's Luke time. That's during the climax,
which I don't want to spoil what happens with, you know,
the big dinosaur fight at the end.
Wait, he's told you the plot?
Yeah, there's a big climax at the end with a dinosaur fight
and there's this one point where he goes,
yeah, it's Luke o'clock and something big happens.
Y'all should go see the new Jurassic World movie
to catch Luke Keddie.
We're not sponsored, but we, you but we just want to support a friend.
I am a little bummed because he... I thought he was honoring his NDA and not telling anyone
the plot of the movie.
Or I guess maybe he just doesn't trust me, but he told you.
Oh, you have loose lips.
That's true.
Loose lips sink ships.
They sink ships, right. He did tell me the one line where he goes, fuck it,
it's Luke ours. And I do like that one, I think that's pretty cool.
He's a good actor though. He's a very good actor.
Here's his demo reel. I'm just kidding Luke, you don't have to do that.
I just could tell his heart instantly started racing when I said here's his demo reel.
Just like I could tell his his heart instantly started racing when I said here's his demo real just like I could picture his face
Interior watermelon red interior watermelon pink
Dude he was interior watermelon pink you should have seen it. He was terrified
Never I've never seen such a shade on it. I never want to see that
Never I've never seen such a shade on it. I never want to see that
Shade of interior watermelon pink on his face ever again. No, I just want to see
regular luke ketty pink on his face
those rosy pink cheeks of his
That rosy button nose god. He has a fucking little button nose. Yeah, he just he just has like a
Like red red fever. He's just always flushed.
Scarlet fever?
I don't think red fever's a thing.
Scarlet fever?
You know.
Because he has scarlet fever
because he's in that movie with Scarlett Johansson.
I was about to say, I was about to say,
that's interestingly bringing up.
Uh-huh, that's pretty good.
Because of Scar Joe.
That's pretty good.
Hold on, sorry.
What?
You might have to cut some stuff, just um...
What?
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System now at Walmart.ca. This is the declaration what of independence why this is the declaration what of independence
what right now I think that's that's one of your better ones it's a it's it's to the reference
of Lonely Island no epic movie we are the pirates what the Caribbean? You know when they start rapping?
Gotcha. Sorry. It's been a while since I've seen it. I thought it was a reference to the
SNL digital short where it's a, you know, the chronicles of what calls of Narnia.
Yeah, the chronicles what of Narnia.
But I do like the Epic movie reference better.
Right?
Do they copy each other?
I think-
Epic movie came out before that.
No. No. Did they copy each other? I think- Epic movie came out before that.
No.
No.
The SNL shorts from like 2007, 2008, 2009 at the latest.
Well, epic movies from like 2000, something like that.
Because I was in middle school.
2008, I think.
Let's see.
Maybe it was just part of the cultural zeitgeist at the time.
That specific delivery of rap lines.
Epic movie 2007.
Okay.
And when was the Chronicles of Narnia rap by Chris Parnell and Andy Samberg?
Let's see, 2009.
So you're telling me the Samberg and Parnell ripped off Epic movie, you two, they just
saw it.
Is it called Lazy Sunday?
Lazy Sunday.
Wake up in the late afternoon.
Call Parnell just to see how he's doing.
Yep.
So, looks like they stole the beat
from Epic Movie's Pirates of the Caribbean rap battle.
We are the pirates, what of the Caribbean?
Yeah, we are the pirates, what of the Caribbean?
I'll be honest, dude.
Wait, Epic Movie is the one with Narnia, right?
Yup.
Okay, I watched it once in seventh grade with two girls.
Okay, we can watch it again if you want.
I would love to watch it if you want to watch it for an episode of Uncle Sleepover.
That would be fun.
I'd love that.
It is your turn to choose a movie.
I believe.
We're doing it tomorrow.
Yes.
With a special guest.
The first Uncle Sleepover with a special guest. The first Uncle Sleepover
with a special guest. Yep. And I'm looking forward to this one. I gotta make sure I'm on my A game.
I might even have to write some material beforehand. It's gonna be a good one though.
It rhymes with PJ Fallis. It's like a slant rhyme.
PJ Phallus. It's like a slant rhyme.
DJ Khaled.
I know, I don't want you to spoil the guest though.
No, they couldn't hear me.
I whispered so quietly the mic couldn't pick me up.
I can spoil your guest if you're gonna act like that.
Stephen Miller.
Sorry, it rhymes with shh.
I'm just playing man, sit down.
Please, you're scaring me with that.
Yeah, you didn't expect me to stand on bidness.
You're standing on bidness right now and it's freaking me out, sit down!
I'm a husband? I'm a fucking father?
I'm a best friend? I'm an uncle?
It's clicking for me, you're standing on bidness, I see it.
Yeah, yeah! Now you're starting to recognize I stand on bidness.
Alright.
Yeah! Now you're starting to recognize I stand on bidness! Alright!
I didn't even flinch.
Two for flinching.
Ah!
Ah!
That would be great if that's what it was.
Two for flinching.
The fuck fuck man?
Hockey fucking spit.
Just like hockeying a fucking disgusting like mucus loogie on somebody.
It's moments that like that like that that make me love doing this with you.
Dude.
I mean not that I already don't love doing it with you but it's moments like that that remind me of all the massive amounts of joy and giggles that I've that I've garnered over the years through this show alone.
Dude, that's so sweet. Like that's literally as sweet as something that like a lover a lover could say in while while laying in bed with another lover, you know, whispering upon their lobe like, you know, it's things like this that make me love doing what we do, you know?
Nibble on your earlobe a little stop stop nibble on that little middle piece of the
ear right here that sticks into it you know what I'm talking about yeah what's that
called I don't know let's come the perineum the agglut of the ear yeah the
aglium I mean sure might as well be I I mean, I don't know what it's called.
Is there a term for it? We could create it and it can be put into the Oxford Dictionary
because, I mean, why wouldn't they want
words to be created
that explain what things are?
Right. Aglium.
Who's in charge of that?
Some fucking dumbass, probably.
So like a new word can just be made, it's like
yeah, we felt like making a new word.
They gatekeep that shit, dude. Do they like make new words from from now and again or is it all like you know culturally specific like it's culturally generated?
I don't think they like
I don't think like there's like a committee that sits down and they're like we're gonna make a new word today
And we're gonna put in the dictionary.
Why not?
I wish that would be fucking awesome.
So speaking of words.
Yeah, I know where this is going.
You know what time of the Week it going. You know what time of the
week it is. I know what time of the week it is. It's time for the word of the week.
Super mega shows word of the week.
Sorry play that play that up close for the mic. What the hell is that? Well we have to introduce
it. We can't let this guy introduce it.
Oh yeah, you're right, you're right.
Floxynosinehillipilification.
Floxynos, that's what I got so far, but so.
Floxynos.
Holy fuck.
Floxynosinehillipilification.
Floxynosinehillipilification.
You might have to just like write it out much like write it out in
the way it sounds
floxie not
There's a there's a rhythm to it and if we learn the rhythm floxy noxy
Hill the pillification, you know floxy noxy
so iambic pentameter
Floxing floxy noxie na hilly put up it's floxie noxie na hilly pillification no pillification floxie noxie na Oh, there's a lot of Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi Nasi N No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,
no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,
no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,
no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,
no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, floxie not hilly pillification floxie not seen he he pillification or am I
missing floxie not seen neat floxie not seen me hilly
pillification anyway guys it's on the screen that's the word of the week like
I like us like that like us introducing is just like keep that whole part in I
want everyone to see that we struggle with that one. What does it mean?
Floxynoxynephilification means the action or habit of estimating something as worthless,
just like America might have been thrown off as worthless by the British at some point.
Oh, they definitely floxynosynephilificationed us, our asses.
Oh, they definitely floxie noxie nihilip-philipication to us our asses
My new book so like used in a sentence in my new book is more than just a 400 page exercise in floxie noxie nihilip-philipication
You got it nihilip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philip-philipification nihilip from nihilism like nihil like
nihilid nihilip
Illification like oxy that comes from nasi
Nihili, okay. Look at this
floxy
Noxy
nihilip
pilly
vacation
Does nihilic come from nihilism you think?
Nihilistic maybe that's the root of it?
Because it's like worthless or like doesn't mean anything?
Uh, it doesn't mention that, but maybe.
Fuck!
Thought it was being smart.
I mean I'm sure it comes from Latin like there's floxie, nasi, nihil- well actually nihili,
what is the Latin root of that?
Yo let me get a- let me go down to downtown and cop a couple floxie nassies, you know what I'm saying?
Out of nothing is Nihili-
Yeah.
Okay, okay, okay.
That's still like nihilism, you know, it's just like, pfft.
I don't give an F. Everything is- is- is- is- doesn't mean shit.
And, uh, so yeah, that's the Word of the Week.
Mm-hmm. We expect all of you to use it down below.
Use it in the comments.
And I actually, now that the word is off the screen, don't rewind it.
I want everyone that is watching this on YouTube right now, go in the comments and without
looking at the other ones, do your best to type that word out from how you think it's spelled.
From what you remember being.
And we're not gonna say it again.
I wanna see the comment section filled with floxing with that.
Just gibberish.
Do your best, your best guess.
YouTube's gonna crack it down on us, because it's gonna look like we just got bots to comment bullshit on our video.
They're gonna think it's some fucking, like, we literally just botted the channel.
And they just have to comment spam
What is stopping?
Us from buying bots to get back to 1 million subs
Nothing
except morals
Light morals, I guess
Yeah, as Americans we do have morals
Fuck I guess. Yeah, and as Americans, we do have morals. Fuck.
Maybe someone else could buy them for us.
Then that's like a moral loophole.
It's like a proxy, yeah.
It's like, we didn't do it.
We didn't buy the bots for our channel.
Does anyone ever do that anymore?
Do they even have that service?
Usually, I think it's done as just kind of like a
maybe it's done in a legitimate way but I've seen it be used as kind of like a
like an antagonistic thing. Botting someone so it's like what? Close your legs. Close my
close your legs. Oh XYZ my bad sorry about that. I'll keep them crossed.
Yeah Luke if not obvious just yeah don't don't let that be shown
Luke make sure you censor that yeah you know
America land of the free so and home of the
brave steak what
brave. Steak? What? I mean, who made steak first? America. Dude, we could open up a steakhouse when that's the land of the free, home of the steak. Yes. You know, like that's a great slogan.
Like Outback, but it's for Americans. Or we can open up a bakery, land of the free home of the bake. Oh, I like that home with the baked goods. Yummy. Yummy
Yeah, no, that's its sister thing. We have the steakhouse attached as a bakery
The bake house the bake house get baked at the bake house
That Carolina Levitt sure is a
babe Sure sure she's younger than me. She's 27 something like that Carolina Levitt sure is a babe
Sure sure she's younger than me. She's 27 something that Luke put Caroline Levitt
Put put a put put her picture on screen. That's right. She's 27. She's younger than me now Luke throw tomatoes at it
Good. Thank you. Well, Luke has a big crush on
Caroline, so I don't know if that's gonna Luke. I'm sorry, I'm gonna ask for the tomatoes to continue.
I'm just kidding, you can, I don't know.
I don't know how much green screen footage
of tomatoes being thrown there are.
I'm sure if you go on YouTube
and look up green screen tomatoes.
No, easy, yeah, yeah, yeah.
You know, you don't have to key frame anything,
it's just a.
Exactly, you just key it out.
Yeah.
But when I found out she was 27, I was shocked because I thought she was like in her 40s.
She's younger than me, that's fucking insane, dude.
I hit him right in the temple.
I saw that. The mannequin is fucking- he didn't deserve that. Why is he catching strays?
It was an accident.
You threw it right at the mannequin, hit him right in the temple. If he comes to life one day, he's gonna kill you.
Before me. Fuck. Shit. I one day, he's gonna kill you. Before me.
Fuck.
Shit.
I forgot to take my July 4th dump.
Oh, you gotta take a July 4th dump?
Don't flush it this time.
I wanna see it this time.
You flushed it last year before I got a chance to see it or smell it.
Well?
I took a picture of this sucker.
Kinda crazy given that it's your life worth.
Let me see.
Whoa, dude!
Right?
Nice.
Hey, look, throw that up.
That's a nice fucking shit.
Very patriotic.
Very patriotic.
And that honestly makes up for flushing it last year before I got the chance to see or
smell it.
You're welcome.
You didn't flush it, all right?
I left it in there so you could go see it in person.
Dude, thank you.
Of course.
I was about to be so mad if two years in a row
you flushed it.
It could, you know, be softened by the water
and not be in the same pristine condition
like it was in the picture.
The more it softens in the water,
the more the smell disperses throughout the bathroom
and sinks in the pool. Or Luke might go flush it,
but I didn't tell him to keep it in there, so. He better not flush it. I Or Luke might go flush it, but I didn't tell him
to keep it in there, so.
He better not flush it.
I mean, just looking at it, you wouldn't flush that.
Absolutely not.
It's insane.
If Luke walks in and sees that in the toilet
and flushes it, then he's a madman.
Help us save us.
Luke is a madman, help us save us.
You go back and reverse some of our episodes.
Luke is a madman, help us save us. You go back and reverse some of our episodes. Luke is a madman, help us save us.
That's a little Spy Kids 1 reference guys.
Oh yeah. Floop is a madman, help us save us.
Floop is a madman, help us save us.
You know, he is a madman, help us save us though.
Floop legitimately is a madman.
And he becomes good by the end.
Spoiler alert! Sorry. Legitimately as a madman and he will he becomes good by the end spoiler alert
Sorry, so does uh the other guy that has left four faces does he eventually become good or does he's good in the second?
Is he kind of curmudgeonly good like mmm, I guess I'll help
I'm pretty sure in the second movie. He's uh
He works for the OSS now, right and he's like Hill is the
Yep, whoo. He's the yeah whoo he's the
big he's the big cheese he's the fucking I love that he's in that head-on show
because you could hear it you know you can just barely like what does he even
like what is Mike Judge's regular talking voice is kind of Hank Hill-ish so
like when he plays the president of the OSS in Spy Kids,
it's like,
Juni?
Carmen?
You can hear it still.
It's just like, it's so weird that he just acted in that.
Cause he doesn't do much live action acting, does he?
No.
I can't think of anything else I've seen him in actually.
Live action other than there was like a Jackass 2 clip,
maybe he was in Jackass 2
I think he was an action point no he he was that makes ended story by
Mike I want to see actor yeah, I'm gonna look up specifically at you know office space or he just
Right and direct that looking which I have not seen I have not seen office space. I've heard. It's pretty good though
Are you excited for the king of the hill review? It was an RIPD is various dead. Oh
I'm guessing demons or RIPD forgot about that
Cleveland wait Hank Hill was in the Cleveland show in two episodes
What sorry he's like I've seen Hank Hill in Family Guy before they've done a couple because they're both Fox
So I've seen them do bits before where they put Hank Hill in
and he says something.
Talk about greatest crossover of all time.
Can someone say crossover episode?
I mean, they did add Hank Hill, Cleveland Brown,
and Bob S. Burger.
I don't know, dude.
Bob S. Burger.
Bob S. Burger.
To Fortnite.
Yeah, yeah, so. And how excited are you for the King of the Hill reboot? I don't know dude. Bob S burger To fortnight. Yeah
And how excited are you for the king of the hill reboot? That one is that August? So fucking excited
August? That's in August that's coming up
Season 14, baby, and you've been rewatching king of the hill. Yeah preparation, right? I'm like mid to late season two right now
They're long seasons and you know, I'm not I'm like been I'm like bingeing, I'm like watching it like whenever I eat. Yeah so
you're not you're not just fucking sitting down and you know consuming eight
episodes of King of the Hill in one sitting? No it's usually like one to two
a day. Yeah. Maybe three if it's a good day. King of the Hill also is one of those
shows that in my opinion, actually I was gonna say
you know maybe like 8 to 10 episodes in a day is a little much for King of the Hill.
Hey if you're a King of the Hill fan I'm not gonna judge you.
Actually maybe it's the calm nature of it that would make it even better for Binging.
I would like to rewatch it before the new season comes out and And I am very, very excited.
To do some binging with Babish?
Not with Babish, he's not returning my phone calls.
That's not funny.
I mean, it's kind of hurtful
because I thought we were friends.
And I explained to him that the not safe for work picture
I texted him was an accident.
And I meant to send it to someone else that
starts with B in my contacts.
Who is this? Okay so it's a cooking guy. Yeah. Yeah Like a little boy
Like it was a man but my head I'm like is this like some like
Gamer dude that like I don't like I just know the name. He's another name. Yeah Babish
I didn't know it was a cooking channel. He was a he was a guest on the Adam Friedland show
I mean Benji Babish is I know he's big. That's why he was, I mean, think about it.
I'm not even like, I don't watch this stuff regularly,
but even he was up here.
I mean, honestly, if you eat that much food,
you are gonna be big, you know?
It's just what happens to the body.
It looks healthy.
You know, for a 4th of July episode,
I feel like we didn't talk about America as much.
America too much.
You know, we...
Well, how about I look up some facts about America.
Oh yeah, America facts.
Some fun, fun America facts.
For all you America heads out there, it's America time.
Hold on, let me...
For all you patriots out there, you're about to learn a little thing or two about this
country and if you're not an American,
you're about to wish you were when you hear these facts.
Are you ready for this?
The US flag has been changed 27 times.
The current 50 star version was designed by a 17 year old student for a school project,
and he got a B minus until it was accepted by the government.
That's so American just stealing some kids work.
A B minus?
Like he gets a fucking B minus and then the American government is like, we could use that for free, let's take it. It's a kids work, he's not going to do anything about it.
Americans eat around 155 million hot dogs on the 4th of July.
Uh, yeah, I eat about that many just myself on the 4th of July.
Um...
Uh, the Library of...uh, sorry.
The Library of Congress is the largest in the world.
It contains over 170 million items, and it receives about 10,000 new items
every day. That's crazy. That's one big library. Woo! I don't even... Do you think
you could fit all those hot dogs in there? There's a place in the United
States where mail is delivered by mule. It's the Grand Canyon. I've seen those
mules. Have you been to the Grand Canyon? I've been to the Grand Canyon. Have you seen those little mules that are like...
I have not. It's beautiful though.
It is truly... Here's one thing I will say about America.
America has such a wide variety of beauties, you know, from snowy peaks...
Desert.
Desert. You got the Grand Canyon.
Wetlands. Florida? You know from from snowy peaks desert desert. You got the Grand Canyon
Florida. Mm-hmm. Oh
Do you how about how many more facts do you want? Give me a number now and I'll produce how many of you said three?
Sit around three sure
It's hard to keep track. Let's do three more three more
Okay
One North Dakota town has more cows than people. Actually, that's true in 13 states.
Can someone say winning?
Yeah, I can't hear you.
Mooing.
Mewing.
Sorry.
Fuck, it's mooing now.
Oh, okay, are we ready for this?
I bet you can make a lot of hot dogs from all those cows.
Yeah.
In 1976, the United States planned to nuke the moon.
Did you know this?
I did not know this.
It was called Project A119.
It was to show the Soviet Union how serious we were.
Luckily someone said, uh, that's not a good idea.
That's a horrible idea.
I love that Cold War was just chest thumping back and forth where it's like, yep, we just
blew up a bomb.
What are you going to do?
And they're like, well, we'll blow up a slightly bigger bomb.
What are you going to do?
We're going to blow up the moon.
And then I'm going to give one more right one final fact one more final fight final fact to end
us off and real quick before that final fact you might see a list of names on
screen right now actually two lists of names those people are on the top list
those are true American Patriots and the bottom list those are traitors to the
Union and they will be executed
You can join on the patreon. Are you ready for the last fun fact of America? Yes, okay
The Pentagon has twice as many toilets as it needs
That's due to back in the day when the United States implemented segregation and needed separate toilets for black people
and white people and now today they just have extra plumbing and double the restrooms they
need.
Yeah, I'm gonna need that many toilets when I eat all those hot dogs on 4th of July.
Thank you everybody, good night!
Get this off.
Get this off of me.
Lick it off.
Lick it off. Hey everyone, I'm Carlos and I'm the host of Jumperjump Podcast.
Prime Day is coming from July 8th through 11th.
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