supermegashow - Belt Wiener | supermegashow - 106

Episode Date: March 25, 2026

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Starting point is 00:01:12 I wonder if my head of office has a forever setting. An IG Private Wealth Advisor creates the clarity you need with plans that harmonize your business, your family, and your dreams. Get financial advice that puts you at the center. Find your advisor at IG Private Wealth.com. I wish I had some water, man. I really wish I had some water. I'm watching you drink that and it's just...
Starting point is 00:01:36 Well, okay. You couldn't have saved one sip from me. I got nervous because... Well, you have your shamrock shake. I can't... You know? And I bet you want some, don't you? What's it...
Starting point is 00:01:49 What's the flavor? What's the flavor of a shamrock? I don't know what that is. Just like... Is it just green food coloring and like a birthday cake flavor? Wouldn't you like to know. It looks kind of like...
Starting point is 00:02:02 a mountain do Baja blast. Looks nothing like that. Kind of does. You're wrong. Like a Baja Blast freeze. Which, by the way, nothing pisses me off more than when I order it. Ordering a freeze and then giving you a regular Baja blast. Actually, the exact opposite.
Starting point is 00:02:18 Ordering a regular. Well, that's because the Baja Blast. I think, so you like the Baja Blast regular more than the freeze. I like having something to sip on. The freeze isn't bad, but it's like, if I want the sweet, smooth drink, getting the freeze is just going to make me go. I feel like the freeze tempers it for me. Because I don't, like, it straight up is very, like, it gives me like a melted icy,
Starting point is 00:02:42 like, tinge in my mouth. Baja Blast does. Like, it's like its original form was an icy, and then they collected the syrup, and then now that's Baja blast. So I need, I need, like, a bunch of that ice to dilute it for me to, like, handle it. Right. Otherwise, you just need a sip of water, right? Yeah, because I'm a big baby.
Starting point is 00:03:00 Just like, I wish I had a sip of water. But my friend went and drank it all. You have some water over there. Look at that. To your left. It's not water? What is that? Actually, from a previous episode.
Starting point is 00:03:15 No, no, not that. The clear bottle. Oh, dude, this is clearly Canadian. Clearly Canadian water. Cherry flavored. And I bet you wish you could taste. Dude, what does it taste like? Whoa.
Starting point is 00:03:32 Dude, that maintained its fucking bubbly nature. So that's a good brand. Yeah, dude. Did it quench? That is a tasty water. Pulp fiction reference? You'll get more references after this intro. Oh my God.
Starting point is 00:03:53 Get it started. Luke, come on, dude. Luke. It tells a story. That's a water bottle that was not only drank to completion. Well, there's a civil. in here. No.
Starting point is 00:04:33 For later. Please, can I have that? Please. Just want, there's a little bit left. It's probably just my spit. It is.
Starting point is 00:04:41 I read something that like the last, the last tiny, tiny bit of a drink is, is almost always spit. Would you read this? The Science Journal. The American Scientist. It's a publication.
Starting point is 00:04:56 You wouldn't know about it because it's something that us geniuses read. Science Weekly. Science Month, that exists. I'm sure, I'm sure the American scientist is also a publication. When did social studies go from social studies to history? I mean, it's not, why was it? Do you remember that?
Starting point is 00:05:16 Social studies was history, right? Social studies is learning about history. I don't know why it's called social studies. Because social studies sounds like anthropology or anthropology. Yeah, it sounds more like, yeah, you're talking about like sociology. Yeah. Which I don't think we were doing that. elementary school.
Starting point is 00:05:33 No. Instead, they were like, and then sometimes the slaves would have feast with their masters and they'd sing songs. Real stuff we learned in South Carolina history in eighth grade. Your school sounds like they were a lot more pro-slavery than mine. I had at least English teachers that would be like have, dedicate whole sessions to like showing us graphs and shit of like the boat and stuff. Well, we saw that too. Doesn't, but your teacher would follow it up with like, look how, isn't this like an amusement park ride. Like, y'all are going to slumber parties and, you know, you guys are all sleeping over and
Starting point is 00:06:04 your sleeping bags on the floor, you know? But the thing was at my school, I think that was only predicated on the fact that I had teachers who cared to deliver that history to us because it wasn't, I remember most of, like, my lessons on slavery and how bad it was didn't take place in history class. It took place in English class. Because, you know, you'd read like Huckleberry Finn and shit and then you'd have to get the historical context of like why why that was said back then why it's not okay now and then
Starting point is 00:06:33 just like that's one of the examples I feel like I would also just watch there I don't want to dox this teacher do it docks them no but it was like there's something about you know I I get there's some who maybe are a little like cringe or whatever but sometimes liberal arts teachers pull through you know and they and they try to they try to help what they can help And then, you know, I'd go to my social study or my history class and be told that by the teacher that Ronald Reagan was the greatest president of all time and that evolution isn't possible because watermelons don't come from clouds.
Starting point is 00:07:13 So, you know, a very odd range in the South Carolina education system. No, yeah, I had history teachers that because the textbooks were what really taught about the, the joyous feasts and the, uh, the cartwheels and the jumping jacks and they even sometimes hired magicians to come to the parties. The feasts and stuff I remember more so for like Thanksgiving where it was like, we were all pals, the Native American and, and the new man, you know, coming together and they're a little picnics. The new man. New man for a new world. Exactly. That's, that's how they saw it. They're like, ah, but dude, we discovered this. How mystical would that have been to be back in like England back in the day
Starting point is 00:07:58 and just hearing about the new world it's just the fuck dude the new world it's across the ocean you see the ocean and you don't know what's on the other side but you hear these whispers of the new world I mean Matt we're living in it we're living in the new world in fact we're not just living in the new world we're living
Starting point is 00:08:15 on the very outer bounds of the new world that they when they got to the new world they fought tooth and nail to get to where we are in the new world the final frontier Lewis and Clark and Sacagaoia Pocahontas
Starting point is 00:08:34 Louis and Clark by the way Luigi and Clark by the way Louis and Clark Dude Those dudes like Imagine Just getting funded
Starting point is 00:08:45 By the fucking Queen or whatever And your whole job is just to fucking take a little boat And just go find some Some shit That's already been found I guess that feeling would be really cool
Starting point is 00:08:56 But I think You know With my modern brain I just go That would be terrifying Like just going on a boat in the middle of the fucking ocean And just being like, land ho. Let's go see what this place is about.
Starting point is 00:09:09 Just kind of walk there. You know, like there's no like peek your head in, see how the like temperature of this island is. Like you have to kind of like you have to traverse it. Sometimes, you know, you'll just rub against a plant that'll kill you in 30 seconds. Well, yeah, that's the thing, man. It's like, first of all, you didn't even know if there was some shit out there. You might like back then we didn't know shit. It's like you get in that boat.
Starting point is 00:09:31 and the queen's like, go find land. And you're like, okay. I want more. Okay, yes, queen. And you're going to get on the boat and you're like, as far as you know, the ocean could go on forever. Like, it could just actually not end. Yeah, because it turns out just the way that the wind and everything, like we don't have
Starting point is 00:09:49 ship travel like really to a science set in terms of going to like, you know, an uncharted territory. So they're just going around in a circle the whole time. Like, I mean, that had to have happened to like a crew at like early sailing where it's Like they just spent all their entirety of their life because it was short lived out at sea going in like a circle, unable to find land. Dude, they might have just got out in the middle of the ocean and then just started. Not like a like a shallow circle, but I mean like it's like very, it's like you can barely tell they're turning. And they're just like, yeah, we're keeping it straight.
Starting point is 00:10:19 Looks like it. For for sure. Well, they were really good at navigating with the stars. So maybe they were like, I mean, that could have happened around Antarctica actually because that's the only part of the ocean in the world. where it's completely uninterrupted. So you could technically sail around Antarctica forever. And the wind is really strong. So we can just keep pushing you, keep pushing you.
Starting point is 00:10:41 And you would just be like, damn, this is a really long ocean. I guess like they would use the stars. Would like Polynesian like would they use the stars and shit to navigate? Yeah, that's how like, dude, they were super good at a... Because I know they had their little like tools that they go look up up. Okay, so that mean, you know, do all that. know what that tool's called. It's like the metal thing where they can have a pencil attached or whatever. It's not a protractor. It's not a protractor. That's not
Starting point is 00:11:09 what that is. You and I like going on an exhibition at sea. Don't worry guys. Fuck, where are we? Protractor. Don't worry. I got this. It's a protractor. I know. Imagine like waiting all the way till night and then going the starship. Oh, fuck. Oh shit. No, that. Yep. Okay. I see where we went wrong. That means you went like a total like 13 hours out of your way. Dude, that shit happened.
Starting point is 00:11:39 Like they would go the wrong way. And you can't realize until the next night. And you're like, oh, shit. Well, who's going to tell the cap? No, it's goes. Oh, fuck. Hey, Cap. What?
Starting point is 00:11:52 I told them last time. So, uh, yeah. You know the whole thing about getting to the new world on time. Might be about. 24, 25 hours late er than we were gonna be What? I mean, we haven't turned
Starting point is 00:12:10 turned things over I'm It's just how things are, you know? The stars change You know, and the waves get rocky Because they'd always be throwing up They'd send the guy that could puke on command To go tell the captain
Starting point is 00:12:25 Because he was also afraid of puke And the captain all of a sudden You'd see that he would go and then you cut to the captain's face and he's and he wipes it off in a perfect kind of hand wipe where now he's clean
Starting point is 00:12:39 and then he says something like I'm guessing, Duncan! With his hand, with his fist raised up or his hook raised up Private Duncan. When did they turn the pirates of this?
Starting point is 00:12:51 Because at first they were just explorers. They turned into pirates because the crew see here's the thing. The crew is so dumb. They keep getting lost that they go mad, right? And they have to resort to piracy.
Starting point is 00:13:03 Exactly. Like they start starving. They finally see another ship one day and they have no choice but to take it by force and that's how they become the pirate boys. It was their rescue ship, but unfortunately. There they are. We're going to rescue them.
Starting point is 00:13:16 And it had cannons so they did lose. Dude. Imagine like losing. Dude, but going out on one of those voyages across the ocean to the new world, like that had to have actually been terrifying just because hey you don't know how long it's going to take you don't know if you're even going to make it there sea monsters leviathans were a lot more believable to be true and exist
Starting point is 00:13:38 probably back then all the old tales of sea beasts and stuff and they're there i'm sure there were certain i want to know like what new like species of whale or like at what point did we start to recognize it like oh i that's a humpback whale like at what point was it like what the fuck is that? And then seeing another different type of beast pop up, you're like, holy hell! Well, if you didn't know about like whales and you're out there in the middle of the ocean and it's all calm and you suddenly see a massive
Starting point is 00:14:06 just like, a big tail and then like, dude, especially when they would, when they jump out of the water, you'd see this big black mass just I'd shoot my cannons at it. Oh yeah. Same with its meat. Oh, it's good. Whale meets. Blow it up with cannons.
Starting point is 00:14:23 Honestly, uh, and then you finally get to the new world and you're like, you know, or you get to some land and you're like, all right, boys, who's first? You first. You know, you get off, step foot on land. It's got to be nice. And then, like you said, you brush against a plant and all of a sudden you break out and in a rash and you're dead. I still think the best air of explorers.
Starting point is 00:14:45 Because, you know, I love the old, like, blue or tan coats with the buttons and the flowery white shit or whatever explorers did for the queen. what they looked like, I don't know. They had to be uncomfortable as hell. But I like the era of explorers where it's like they're on a safari adventure, where it's like the dude with the big glasses and a safari hat and just the whole tan get up with all the pockets and stuff. Like the Nigel Thorneberry ass uniform. Exactly.
Starting point is 00:15:14 You and I could have been great explorers back in the day. We wouldn't have done any of the bad things explorers did. You know, it's exactly what Jack Black's character is wearing in the Jumanji movies. Is that so? Mm-hmm. You're fucking with me I'm not I'm not
Starting point is 00:15:29 I haven't seen him and you're fucking with me I know you're fucking with me Have you seen Jack Black's recent film Anaconda With Paul Rudd starring as well as that real thing? Yeah Jack Black's in the era in his career
Starting point is 00:15:41 Where it's He just does whatever Which has got to be nice Which is kind of like In a different way though Is like Daniel Radcliffe Like when actors just have it made So they're just like
Starting point is 00:15:53 I'm just gonna choose whatever I want. That's got to be a very wonderful, you know, not having to be like, yeah, I guess I'll, I guess I'll read for the P. L and CSI again. I guess I looked above. Some guy like balding with like a mustache. It's like, I guess I look. There's got to be a guy that's like the go-to's like, yeah, he looks like a pervert. Oh, he's the Hollywood. Yeah. He's like, no, no, he plays him. He's an actor. I'm not talking about the, you know. It's got to be a big jump whenever like, uh, uh, uh, You have to play like someone as abhorrent as that in a show or in a movie. It's like Stanley Tucci and what's that movie with Mark Wahlberg?
Starting point is 00:16:37 Where's my daughter? That's not what he said. It asks, I don't think. But it was directed by Peter Jackson. Not, what was it called? The guy that did Lord of the Rings. Lovely Bones. Oh.
Starting point is 00:16:48 I spit a little on you. I saw you spit. I'm sorry. I got excited. I remember the title of the movie. I know, you remember Lovely Bones and you just had to fucking. But like Stanley Tucci, a known name, going, yes, I'll play a guy who kidnaps and assaults young girls. Of course.
Starting point is 00:17:06 It'll be my big break. Stanley, you've already had your big break. Are you sure you want to do this? Ah, it'll be a famous role. Are you sure it's a role you want to be known for, though? It's a famous book, and it's Peter Jackson. I imagine he just only tied himself because it's the guy who is directing Lord of the Rings, so he's getting excited. He's like, oh, yeah.
Starting point is 00:17:25 I'll be in whatever, just whatever role. I mean, yeah, I play a pretty bad guy, but I mean, yeah, it's Peter Jackson. Dude, you're like, the guy that just keeps getting typecast, is like a pedophile coming. Baby, I learned another role! Oh, yes. Oh, God. She entered her head, she's like, please don't be another pedophile. Please, please.
Starting point is 00:17:43 Baby, I get to play the pedophile again. It's our, but it's always teed up, like, okay, what is it? Okay, it's law and order. Oh, God. And, okay, and it's one of their, no, actually, it's, CSI. Oh God. And it's like a special S like special crimes unit. I can't S something new. I can't remember what it is.
Starting point is 00:18:03 Oh fuck. Oh fuck. Oh fuck. And the guy's name is Jeremy. Damn it. And that's the deal's the deal. Jeremy, we got you. Sorry Jeremy. The police are out front. Go ahead and take the headphones off and step outside of your hands up. Don't try to do anything funny. All right. Don't, don't even think about it. They got their guns ready to come out the holsters.
Starting point is 00:18:26 Sorry, Jeremy. Had to be done. Yeah, one wrong move, Jeremy, and you are getting filled with bullets. Like Paul Giamatti. Yeah. At the end of Big Fat Liar. He walked out on the street all blue and it scared the police officers. Two minutes straight of them
Starting point is 00:18:44 just lighten him up. They weren't updated that they were filming. Yeah, I wasn't even in the movie, actually. It's just how he died. Chief, there was a blue man. I mean, I've never seen anything like it. What else are we supposed to do?
Starting point is 00:19:08 Oh, man. I think I got him right before he was shape-shifting or something. Fuck. God. Do you like ad reads? I love ad reads. And you will too. Except for Jeremy, because he's probably, as of it right now, being put in the back of the police car.
Starting point is 00:19:27 Or he's dead. Which might be better than what they would do to him in prison. So hopefully he made the right choice. Adts? Yeah, go to ads. Right before ads, right before ads, though. Yeah, but... Where are my gloves?
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Starting point is 00:20:50 On my new show, funny you ask, trivia starts the conversation, and then things immediately go off the rails. I ask a question. My guests think they know the answer. Sometimes they do. More often, they do not. And then the conversation takes a turn. One trivia question turns into stories about career highs, painful bombs, and behind-the-scenes moments that probably should have remained private. You'll hear confidence, misplaced confidence, bold guesses, wrong answers, quick laughs, and the slow realization that maybe this, was a bad idea to say out loud. If you like smart comedy, sharp conversations, and trivia that exists purely to melt people's brains, this is Funny You Ask with me, Ike Barrenholz.
Starting point is 00:21:30 Follow Funny You Ask with Ike Barronholtz on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to podcasts. Guess who's back? Back again. Guess who's back? Tell a friend. It was better. I asked Luke to come in here and help us out.
Starting point is 00:22:04 And now you said it won't. be the same without Luke as like the beat in the background. And you're right. And I'm, I thought, I was willing to commit that you and I could carry it without Luke. I thought we were, well, I mean, you, you did cut it prematurely because I, you could at least let us try the whole thing out. You ended up, I mean, you just feel a little self-conscious and you cut us before you even got to the, guess who's back, guess who's back?
Starting point is 00:22:30 But Luke's like baritone and the way that he like, like, hits those like rhythmic kind you know yeah but he's been practicing a lot of the beatboxing shit he sounds great you killed us before we even fucking got a chance Luke can you
Starting point is 00:22:44 your talents at least if you're not going to do it with us here can you play a snippet of you beatboxing it's incredible please dude so uh
Starting point is 00:23:07 tell me something like oh sorry you cut me out off. Now my big delivery is ruined. Sorry. Go on. No, it's, it's, that's it. You said, tell me something and I was confused at first. I was like, I was going to ask you like about what. Tell me something. Tell me something.
Starting point is 00:23:23 About what? You choose. You were setting up your own thing. Obviously, you weren't just asking me to like think, like, come up with something, but now you are. You can talk about your original thing. And no, come up with something, please. Junie B. Jones. More like, never mind. No, come on, man. There was something good there. I could see it in your eyes. Juni B Jones More like Junie B Oh
Starting point is 00:23:58 There's a joke here Watch it This is These are books from elementary school You're right Is that why you said Nevermind Because you're too fucking woke
Starting point is 00:24:06 And pussy to make a joke No I thought of No I thought of something But I'm not sure I could do it On this podcast I might have to do it On MTV
Starting point is 00:24:14 What? What could be so inappropriate You can't do it on our podcast But you can do it on An FCC you know, monitored television program.
Starting point is 00:24:26 Tune in Saturday night, MTV 2 and find out. Like how it changed. You actually just like end up on there. It's like you in front of a whole crowd is Juniby Jones. Y'all remember that book, right? Well, here, try this one on for size. Juniby Jones more like.
Starting point is 00:24:44 Then they actually bleat me out. And the crowd is just. Right guys? Guy, come on guys. Junie B.J. Never mind. Did you actually have something? Or did you just say, never mind as a cop out?
Starting point is 00:25:05 When? Oh, in that moment? Oh, in that moment, I didn't have anything and I was just going, never mind. That was dropping the mic. Damn, I thought you actually had a, you got me. Here. Juniper blows. I mean, have you had, you don't like gin.
Starting point is 00:25:22 Maybe Junie B. Juniby Pones. Yo! Because she's a gamer. Right, okay. Okay. Well, what about you? You just breeze past mine.
Starting point is 00:25:36 Well, it didn't sound like it rhymed as much. Juniper blows? You don't like juniper at all. You fucking hate juniper. You're right. Juniper is what gin is made out of guys. It tastes like Christmas trees is what Ryan says. And he goes, oh, he has gin.
Starting point is 00:25:49 He goes, oh, that's what you do every time. I do. I don't like it. And I'm very much. I don't like pour myself a glass and go like me at a party pouring myself a glass of gin. Oh, who bought this? This tastes like shit. Fucking St. Nick here?
Starting point is 00:26:05 What the hell is this? What is it Christmas? Oh, I just throw it at the wall. Come on guys. Dude, I remember being like 21 and buying fucking like liquor glasses and being like, yeah, I'm classy now. I'm classy now. I'm pouring myself like some liquor making a little mixed beverage. some rum and coke mayhap.
Starting point is 00:26:25 The thing is you buy like nice liquor glasses at 21. You're like, I'm classy. When you pour yourself just like Jack Daniels. Yeah. Captain Morgan. You're like, mm-hmm. Yep. Popping open a Mike's hard lemonade.
Starting point is 00:26:38 Pouring that shit into a liquor glass just on the rocks. Put a lime on it. Maybe a little umbrella. That's a teaky drink if I've ever seen one. Some decorative cherries. Dude. Mike's hard lemonade is just a. that is that is just it's it's uh it's like a a cavity in a bottle plus a hangover uh in a bottle
Starting point is 00:27:02 it's like on the same tier for me as red's apple ale where it's like that's a lot of that's a lot of sugar like it's like red's apple ale it's like that's a lot of i don't know because there's a difference between red's apple ale of like the type of apple it is and something like strongbow or something that's a little more light on the apple or it tastes a little more genuine at least. I think songbo's a little more dry. Yeah. It's not as a...
Starting point is 00:27:27 It's just... It doesn't taste as like sugar-packed. We're like, Mike's Heart Lemonade. They put so much sugar in that shit that like, you know, if it wasn't that sweet, I think you would taste how truly quality the beverage is. So they're like, put a little more sugar up in there. It's a sweet drink. Same with like Smyranoff Ice or, yeah, Reds Appl.
Starting point is 00:27:51 White Claw. White Claw's pretty decent. Yeah. White Claw's pretty good. Some of the flavors can be a little, like, it's kind of just like, are they the same company? No, no, they're not. White Claw just kind of gives me like Celsius but alcoholic vibes. Tone down on the flavor a little.
Starting point is 00:28:08 White Claw's not that sweet. They just have, maybe I'm just thinking because they both have silver white cans with whatever flavor it is. They seem similar to me. So you know what I like about White Claw? You get lit, but you get hydrated. Mike's hard lemonade. Not a drop of water. No, you're gasping for any form of actual, like, H2O that could help hydrate you
Starting point is 00:28:30 because your body is absorbing all that sugar and drying out your mouth. Woo! Also, I mean, sugar, that leads to a hangover. And you get a drink like Mike's Hard Lemonade. Woo! You got about three or four of those in the system. Tomorrow, not going to be too fun, I'll tell you that. Fex, fetch me a Mike's.
Starting point is 00:28:53 Dad, you've had three already. Being fucking drunk off of three mics are lemonade. Being like plastered. On the couch, just like, oh. That's me another. In reality that he's just going into like a diabetic coma. He's just like, oh. Dad's drunk again, mom.
Starting point is 00:29:18 What? Yeah, he had three mics hurt. He's diabetic. He's diabetic. Every Mike's hard. God damn that boy's fucking crunk if he's having three mics hard lemonade. Dude, I'm pretty sure like your body would be more like the sugar from three mics hard lemonade would just be hitting you way harder than the out.
Starting point is 00:29:39 Because what, Mike's hard lemonade's like 5%. So that's the equivalent of drinking three cans of beer at a party. I still can't do beer. I haven't matured. I don't like it. I don't like the flavor. You're crazy, man. Beer is the best.
Starting point is 00:29:53 Beer is the effin best. I'll stick to my mixed bevies, thank you. Mike's Hard Lemonade's not a mixed bevy. I keep telling you that. But I don't drink Mike's Hard Lemonade. Oh yeah, act all cool for the viewers, Ryan. I used to drink Reds Apple Ale, and then after that was Angry Orchard and then Strongboat. Yeah, you were moving on up.
Starting point is 00:30:12 Then I just gave up and I was like, I don't, I'm just going to smoke weed. Well, you really, you just kept trying like really kind of nasty. Ciders Drink Because I didn't like beer See Strongbo's not bad But see
Starting point is 00:30:29 You gave up there What you should have done Like the rest of us Is then graduated And just drinking straight liquor Some stout Dude stouts are nasty I think stouts are disgusting
Starting point is 00:30:39 It's like People that like stouts Should just I like sours Sowers are good There's the dark ones No no no Stouts are the dark ones
Starting point is 00:30:49 Dark beers Guinness All that get out of here I like a good I like a light beer, like a, like a Pilsner or a logger. Those are good. IPAs are bitter and then sours are. Take a guess.
Starting point is 00:31:02 Sour. I'll have a screwdriver on the rocks. Okay. Let's not get too crazy. Yep. All right. Drink a choice is either going to be that or a rum and coke. Screwdriver on the rocks or a rum and coke.
Starting point is 00:31:15 You and I, like, whenever we have gone out in a recent memory, like let's say like the past, even decade. Like what are the, you, you see me with one of two drinks typically. You get a rum and coke, I get a gin and tonic. Yeah. It's like clockwork. I'll mix it up with like a little screwdriver every now and then, but rum and coke is just kind of like, I can just sip it, get it down. And then I'm like, I'm in the, I got it.
Starting point is 00:31:39 I don't like chugging at something to get that. I like just kind of like getting it over with and feeling it in terms of the alcohol. Yeah, dude, you're going, like, it is funny. Whenever we'll go out and you'll get a drink, just because you really have. hate the taste of alcohol. You down it so... You get rum cook and be like, okay. Okay.
Starting point is 00:31:59 You just, you get it over with. The way you acted is a bit hyperbolic, but yeah, yeah, I guess. And they've asked us to leave several times because of your reaction. Usually, though, what you're missing is that I, I usually down it in probably like three to four big sips out of the little tiny straws they provide. Yeah, you take the little... Yeah. Dude, I... I...
Starting point is 00:32:21 Probably like two to three, honestly. You're not supposed to... You're not supposed to drink your drink with the little tiny black straws. I know they're for mixing, but fuck that, dude. I like sipping out of the small straws. It's fun, right? I can watch it go down. It's just, come on.
Starting point is 00:32:32 I don't want to sip out of a glass someone else has already sipped out of it. The ice might fall in my face. And all my makeup's going to be, going to be smeared everywhere. I know. And then next thing you know, you're going to make such a big fuss about it. We're going to have to be asked to leave. Well, I'm not. I don't blame you for that.
Starting point is 00:32:48 I would do the same thing. I was there, and I wanted to look good. and then that happened and it's he looked at me and this is this was his face dude i'm not lying he went like there was like a bit of that no i know i saw it too um and i wasn't expecting him to be that type but nice peter could at least put on a facade of like normalcy right genuine like niceness well in the name i guess yeah you know or epic lloyd you know he's epic he's epic. He's not going to hide his emotions. If he sees a woman with out makeup on or in your case, a beautiful man whose makeup was just messed up by his drink spilling in his face, he's not going to be
Starting point is 00:33:24 able to hide it as much. He's going to be himself. For those of you who don't know, Epic Lloyd has played many roles. Most notably, he's played Hitler in Epic Rap Battles of History. I think he also, well, there was a sequel where he played Hitler again. It was Hitler versus Darth Vader and then I think it was Hitler versus Darth Vader too Yep
Starting point is 00:33:48 And nice Peter was Darth Vader Wow Well what a lot of people Don't know Is Epic Lloyd When he He actually played Hitler so well
Starting point is 00:33:59 In the epic rap battles A history Well he'd watch footage Like hours and hours Of speeches And Well that was even before They knew they were
Starting point is 00:34:07 gonna make the videos That was One book he read though But He read it multiple times Which just killed All chances ever being in epic rap battles of history.
Starting point is 00:34:15 He's the one that dresses up as Hitler. Yeah, he's the one that goes on stage. Fucking. Sig, Hiling to his fans, his impressionable fans. It's time to cancel Epic Lloyd, dude. It's time to make a video canceling Epic Lloyd.
Starting point is 00:34:30 It's slow motion turning to black and white of Epic Lloyd's Sig Hiling at an epic rap battles concert. Not so epic, is it? I was about the call it the Roxanne. Imagine she had a club. You'd want to perform there. Well, as long as it's,
Starting point is 00:34:43 you know, the Roxanne doesn't take 90% from the artists, like the Roxy does. Well, she's doing what Trump does because she loves Trump so much. She's actually taking the laugh factory. Now it's Roxanne's laugh factory. Just put her in her arm. And you can say the inward as much as you want. That's the byline always on, you know. There's not enough room to show the comedian's names in the times they're going on or anything like that.
Starting point is 00:35:06 It just says that. Yeah. And yeah, it's fucking awesome. Just like, you can really breathe. here. You can say the N word. Just relax, y'all. It's a safe space to say the N word. Go for it. I love how it's like acting like white people were meeting like in underground bunkers and like candlelit like lanterns and shit. Like, okay, we can all say it, right? It's safe to say it now. Like like, ready? On three. One, two, three. Man, they hear like footsteps above like,
Starting point is 00:35:39 like, they hear like a like a, like a, like a drubes. own coming in. Oh shit. Everyone pulling a tarp over. I don't know what they would be pulling a tarp over. Just themselves? Just their notebooks where they write the N word a thousand times. It's like literally just the reverse of like fucking like Nazi Germany where they're like kicking down doors like trying to find people saying the N word and pulling them out.
Starting point is 00:36:03 Isman Gold is like, oh, I just want to say slurs again. Like bro, you can say slur. Do it. Do it. Like I'm pretty sure Asman Gold can say slurs and no one's going to like fucking stop him or cancel him for no i'd dude i mean i'm just glad the burnt peanut has introduced i'm not saying please say it asman i'm just saying like he's acting like people are stopping him and then he's going it could affect business and then in my head i wonder why i wonder why saying slurs would what is the definition of a slur dip shit why would why would saying these words with historical contexts of uh these humanizing uh people uh you know why would that affect business
Starting point is 00:36:45 You know, I could just not, I could just be a nice person and not offend people to, to make a quick buck off of people's stupidity. But I wouldn't be a streamer if I didn't do that. Amen. You know what? Dude, you and I were earlier, before we did this podcast, you and I were on the television going through Twitch channels that were just popping up on the TV. IRL streams.
Starting point is 00:37:09 Yeah, we're looking at IRL streams that had like 20 views popping in, watching them. I was watching a dude with Tim viewers drive. a semi-truck. 13. No, no, sorry, sorry. This is the guy that was driving the 18-wheeler. He was looking at his phone the whole fucking time, dude. He's like, he's driving. He looked at the road, like, twice.
Starting point is 00:37:25 The rest of the time, he's looking at his camera, and then he's pulling his phone out to look at chat, and he's fumbling with it. And, like, I was like, dude, you are driving, like, 40,000 pounds of steel and explosive fuel. Can a cop just see that and just be like, where is it? Oh, yeah, we're just going to go, like, you can't,
Starting point is 00:37:42 like, we have footage. You're live right now. Like, you hear that. echo of the police officer. Could you turn that off? Could you turn that off? Why would I do that? Why would I do that? Just because I just because of, please, you know, then you're the, because they have mics and shit. The feedback just keeps echoing. So honestly, I mean, the guy was really nice besides the fact that, you know, at any moment he could barrel through a family of four in a minivan and just. But he, you know, I saw someone in chat, used some chat feature to cue up a song that played out loud. I got a feeling by the black eyed piece.
Starting point is 00:38:17 Dude, you should have used that to play some just like... I did hop in chat and I said, I said, why is this shit low-key-a-vive crying emoji? And he read it and he goes, yeah, we just out here driving. You need to make like a fake account. Yeah, I shouldn't use my real account. But, and then we found another guy in Miami that was streaming himself, driving and he was uh seemed like he was uh it was a day of a day of club in a head you have to ask shit like hey so are we shoeless in here yeah it's like yo are we driving with shoes on or what
Starting point is 00:38:56 ha ha just just playing and i can't i was like the only person of the chat he's twice in a row something about feet and he looks at his phone while driving goes yo watson why you keep talking my feet man you're like i'm gonna pull up yeah i was like i was like yo what's the move where Where are y'all at? Let me pull up. Let me come hang. He's like the crib. And he said, we're going to the crib.
Starting point is 00:39:19 You weren't invited, dude. I know. He didn't say the address. And I said, well, luckily I know where the crib is. Sounds like someone isn't thankful for a chatter. I know, dude. Like, bro, you have 11 people watching right now and I'm engaging and you're just going to blow me off. Like you're some fucking multi-millionaire?
Starting point is 00:39:37 Driving your fucking Dodge Charger around Miami Beach with shoes on nonetheless. Dodge Chargers is such a. sick. It's a sick sports car. I do have to say there is a page in our 2026 calendar. It's an upcoming month and it aged incredibly given the war in Iran. And you guys will get there pretty soon to that page in the calendar
Starting point is 00:39:59 or you could skip ahead. It's the ad for enlisting. So, you know, I just want to go ahead and just throw that out there. Because it has to do with Dodge Chargers. Israel was going to attack first. had we had to uh duh idiot though they were gonna and then then we wanted but they were gonna and so we had to well this because they were gonna i know it's a whole thing dude it's a whole conundrum so we we we had because they were gonna that's some of the best political analysis out there right now
Starting point is 00:40:38 that is like a geo political geopoliticist what geo is there work for that that's that was probably some like youtube channel dumb down politics where they upload news like updates just in that manner i did see someone break down the the current uh iran war as like a they did a little skit and it was about uh trump attacking bikini bottom and they actually like perfectly dumb down exactly the situation in such an understandable way through SpongeBob. And I recommend everyone go watch that. It was kind of dope. In fact, it had me giggling so hard that I almost forgot that we were actually doing all that stuff over there, blowing things up and starting wars. Killing over a hundred, near 200 kids. Double tapping it too.
Starting point is 00:41:30 Yep. Yeah. And then having epic game streamers called Zach Rar, uh, Kahn. comment about it and cheer for it and gaffaugh and laugh and have a grand old time. While making millions of dollars doing so. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. And then going, I'm just like you guys. I buy my Wendy's just like you. Meanwhile, he has like millions stashed away at a moment's notice. You know, he could dip out. Probably also millions of old Wendy's bag stashed away in his bedroom.
Starting point is 00:42:00 I'm just like you. Everyone has, has millions and millions stacked up just in case they have any health complications or a pet get. sick and they have to spend 12,000. Yeah, but that's also why Asman Gold, you know, lives in the filth. It's to be relatable. He's like, look, the money doesn't matter. I'm just like you guys, you know, shooting in my diaper while I stream and, you know, letting roaches crawl
Starting point is 00:42:22 on me and just grabbing them and tossing them to the side for later. They ask for it, dude. Me, when I'm Asmond Gold, talking about over a hundred children that got blown to smithereens by... It's sick.
Starting point is 00:42:39 By R.R. artillery. And I want to say I when I said it was a tragedy. But then he said they deserved it. When I said sick. Not the children Iran deserved to have their kids killed. The kids didn't deserve to be killed, but Iran deserves to have kids killed because how do I say this chat? What do I need to say? Chat looks at chat. Reads verbatim. Yeah, exactly. Yep. I'm just a racist. He reads that out loud. Well, I mean, is it wrong to think differently? But, uh, ever since the Palestinian shit. Yeah. It's been on site, right? Fuck asmund gold. I'm just going to say it.
Starting point is 00:43:12 And I would fuck Asman Gold. I'm just going to say that too. It's kind of a bit of a love-hate thing going on in my head where it's confusing, if I had to say the least. It's very confusing. And I feel that. I mean, I don't have the same unwavering, confusing attraction that you do. But I can put myself in your shoes and empathize with the situation that you're in. Can you? I can try. Thank you. For sure. Well, I appreciate that you at least try.
Starting point is 00:43:41 Because it's like he says abhorrent things. He's a disgusting human being. But they're always out of context, dude. That's the thing, man. When he... You have to watch the whole four-hour stream, okay, to gain context to the shitty things he says. You got to hear the other racist things he says for it to be in context. Maybe you'll laugh at one of them and you'll forget about the other ones. Yeah. That's what happened with me. Well, see, I tried to do that when someone said, no, dude, him saying that Palestinians were subhuman, uh, that's out of context.
Starting point is 00:44:08 So I started watching more, and then I just started noticing he's kind of cute. And the next thing you know, it's, well, he's saying these bad things. I mean, it's Zach Rar. It's like, all right, all right, sis. Okay, you know? Go off. All right, go off, King. I wouldn't mind being in that fucking dirty bedroom.
Starting point is 00:44:25 Dude, getting dirty. Like, bring, this is what games is all about, baby, you know? Being epic, saying slurs and seeing breasts. Yeah, it is. gaming. When I think of gaming and then like overlay like Mario and fucking Donkey Kong country. Yeah. Yeah, it's all about big tits and saying the N-word.
Starting point is 00:44:51 Like old Pokemon, gay boy shit. Yeah, dude. I'm a game boy. Whatever happened to games? It was nothing but slurs and titties. Dude, slurs and tits, man. Dude, Final Fantasy, when the Mughals would say slurs? Dude, when Cloud drops the F-sler,
Starting point is 00:45:09 write it Saffaroff and Sephyr off. For comedic effect to make the audience laugh. Well, you have me hackling. What if Asmond Gold sees this clip? I mean, he doesn't have sex with me. That's what we would hear. He is kind of like a Muppet. And I mean that, like, in the way he kind of like acts and looks and talks,
Starting point is 00:45:35 You could make a good Muppet representation of him, I think. Like, if Jim Hinson were still kicking it, he could see Asman Gold and be like, I got a great way to twist this into a new character. A lot of streamers actually could be Muppets. XQC could be like the one that's like talking too fast. I saw someone that does a V-Tuber where it's not an actual puppet, but it looks like a, it looks really good.
Starting point is 00:45:59 Like it looks like a Muppet, like a little, you know, one of those puppets you can get custom made to look like you type of thing. You can do that Not like one of the cheap ones But yeah You can get custom puppets Dude like the ones that look like
Starting point is 00:46:12 Sesame Street or Muppets Yeah yeah kind of That'd be sick We should get some of those ma'am What if we do a show Where it's you me and Okay Dupree
Starting point is 00:46:19 How did you read my mind Seriously because think of You know Not only is Owen Wilson And this is probably where your mind was Not only is getting Owen Wilson In this like a must But
Starting point is 00:46:33 Puppet Owen Wilson So we don't have to use de-aging technology to make him satisfied with how he looks in the final product? Genius. And I said genius, not penis. I know since you were just thinking of Asman Gold,
Starting point is 00:46:48 I just want to make, I want to, there's a clear divide, you know. Sure. I just don't want you to get confused and start to get aroused again. Well, I wasn't, but now you've put it back in my head. You haven't, you think Asmond gold's a rockin five, six inches? Of, uh, of a pure American steel?
Starting point is 00:47:07 That's a question to be asked I'm sure, yeah It's a question that all of our viewers should be asking as well It's obviously on your mind No, I'm just complaining guys You're gonna take another ad break You obviously are all horned up
Starting point is 00:47:20 Talking about Asmond gold I'm doing the joke dude I don't have some horny for Asmond gold I'm serious You're seriously horny for Asman Gold? No I said I'm serious I'm not horny for Asmond gold Get trolled
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Starting point is 00:49:23 We're not starting yet. It's just a belt weiner, you know? Matt. Matt, Matt. Matt, we said, stop. It's a belt we're. We talked about this. Went to HR and everything.
Starting point is 00:49:32 No more belt weiner. Just because you say belt weiner instead of belt cock doesn't change it either. Well, it's different. It is different. It's different. It's different. So for those audio listeners, Matt was waving his belts around like it was a penis. It was a belt weiner.
Starting point is 00:49:57 And by the way, you went to HR about belt cock, not belt weaner. So go ahead and file another rapport. It's like the, it's like, it's like, bell weiner. It's like the whole thing where it's the bureaucracy of it where you know, you're just so sick of having to fill out paperwork because I keep changing the terminology that you just stop reporting it. Yeah, dude, it's a, it's belch long. Get belchelong. Dude, who loves a good belt leaner though? Dude, me.
Starting point is 00:50:23 How weird are these pants, though? Dude, you see what's going on here? No, no, seriously. You're just too small for them. No. No. Stop. No, it's not.
Starting point is 00:50:34 That's not true. That's not what I was. I mean, look at you, dude. You're swimming in them. You are. You're swimming in those jeans. I can see. I can see your, dude.
Starting point is 00:50:46 Stand up. No. Look. Dude. Okay. Wait, hold on. No. Look at that.
Starting point is 00:50:53 What is this? These are weird pants. These are, okay. I got these in, um. Okay. So it's not as bad. That just, that makes.
Starting point is 00:51:01 it look. No, no. Like when you were sitting down, it made it look like. This is weird though. These pants are just weird. If you got, viewers,
Starting point is 00:51:07 can you see this? Look at this. Look at this. Look at this. What is going on with these pants? Look at how this works. It's like a, it's like a belt thing.
Starting point is 00:51:16 Hey, I'm trying to show off my pants. You're trying to belt weiner the audience. Will you let me have something here? No, but I got these pants at a thrift store in, and, um, Colorado.
Starting point is 00:51:37 No. Close though. Really? Yeah. Okay. Shit. Fuck. Damn.
Starting point is 00:51:43 Let's not swear so much, okay? It was a thrift store in Cleveland, Ohio. I think. Right? Yeah. Yes. And I thought they were really interesting just because the way it works. It's like they're not regular pants.
Starting point is 00:51:58 They have a built-in belt that you like tie through, but it makes the pants look weird. I used to wear pants like. like that in middle school where it be like come with the belt that you loop back it over itself and that's sake you look at me like that of course i'm gonna laugh yeah i mean you're what you're calling me a middle school no i'm just saying i used to wear pants like that in middle school i did where it has the belt and you get to like kind of loop it in has the two metal thing you're talking about but it's not like this these are it's a different type of pants i've never seen it's like cargo shorts that i don't know these are not like cargo shorts or the type you wore in middle school how sick were those belts that we wore in middle school though
Starting point is 00:52:34 that had the two rings and that's how you did it, you like put it through and looped it back and then, you know what I'm such good belts? It's such a... You never lose it? No, you never lose it. And it's, no, not the ones built into the fucking pants, dude. I'm talking about just those belts in general.
Starting point is 00:52:48 I mean, the belts would come with the pants. They wouldn't be attached to the pants. But like, you could, the thing about modern belts, it sucks is, and I have this problem a lot, because I'm a skinny little string thing. Screw it from the mountain top sister. This problem is,
Starting point is 00:53:02 sometimes the smallest hole on the belt, like to tighten it the most, is still too loose. But with those belts, you can tighten it until the cows come home. You know, you can have a fucking two-inch waist and that belt works.
Starting point is 00:53:16 Maybe I should buy smaller belts. Maybe that's the problem. But, you know, it's dumb to even have sizes for belts. Now, why not one size fits all? It's like a retractable belt. That's what those are. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:53:27 The ones with the two rings that you pull through and then, it's beautiful. Or piece of twine. You can loop it around. If you're super skinny, you can loop it around yourself like three times probably. Yeah. And that's definitely not going in.
Starting point is 00:53:38 And it looks awesome. The thicker the belt, the cooler you look. That's 2026 fashion trends that you guys are getting in on early by listening to this podcast. Thicker the belt, the cooler you look. It was interesting. You'd bring up fashion trends. And it makes me think of you and I saw a movie yesterday. We saw Nirvana the band, the show, the movie.
Starting point is 00:53:59 We both really enjoyed it. But a part that I'm picking. out from that is going back and looking at 2008, and even though they make it a point to kind of like hone in on people who look more like 2008-ish, of course, it's like I forget that, because in my head I'm like, 2012 to today feels like it's like the same shit, almost like everything's melded, but then you go back and you see footage from back then and you're like, oh, damn, there is a different style versus 2025.
Starting point is 00:54:30 But 2025 still, it's like, is the style just big t-shirt, just bagginess? Like, I was trying to pick out the change from 2008 to 2025 in the film. And it's easy, of course, because... Yeah, it's harder to figure out what the style of the era currently is while you're in it. It's really when you look back at it. You realize, like, the things that are phased out now or the things that aren't as cool anymore. But also, I think that things... became once like the internet became more
Starting point is 00:55:03 popular for like everybody because even in 2008 I mean the internet was around but like it wasn't something but everyone was on like it is today I think that like it styles everything gets a little more mixed up and in last longer because things don't age out as much if that makes sense because instead of something sticking around
Starting point is 00:55:27 because it's just for the time being and then moving on to something else. The internet keeps things like circulating around over and over and over again. Does that make sense? So like it lasts? Yeah, yeah, yeah. It lasts longer or like there's more of a, there's less strict eras that just like formulate and it's just kind of like since it's like that with everything with the internet
Starting point is 00:55:48 since there's so much more information now. Maybe trends are more or more so like short lived. So when you go out, it just kind of doesn't seem like much as. changing at all as well maybe the popular fashion style right now would be uh pretty much exactly what i'm wearing like what is the fashion style right now just baggy stuff yeah because it well it kind of um hasn't always been baggy i guess that could be that no baggies is a lot of baggy goes in now because it it goes from um i saw something interesting actually where it was uh oh man what was it it was it might have been guys on the Bachelorette,
Starting point is 00:56:32 and it was like all of them together from the Bachelorette in 2016 and then like a more recent one. And it was, all of them were wearing like, back in 2016, like super tight jeans and kind of like tighter shirts. And now it's like the exact opposite where they were all wearing like baggy jeans and baggy shirts.
Starting point is 00:56:54 And then it'll probably go back. It'll probably loop back because... What do you think V-Nex? will come back? Because VNX were big in 2016. Oh, yeah. When's the last time we saw V-neck on a dude? It's been a bit.
Starting point is 00:57:07 You know, I'm talking about that Jersey Shore style. Yeah. The tight V-neck. And maybe that's just not even an era of fashion. Maybe that's just a certain type of group. You know how, like, emo slash, you know, there's, that's always been around. It's not like... Yeah, but even emo and goth kids dress different from how they dress in 2008.
Starting point is 00:57:25 What is it today? It's still like the group, but they dress differently. Is it today? like those septim piercings and you know Alicia Lou or whatever has them has a piercing in the gum right here up in the teeth yep those those listen I mean I you know if you're if you're watching or listening to this and you have one of those piercings all power to you
Starting point is 00:57:46 for me it just it bothers me because it's like it looks like it's gotta be uncomfortable and like especially this part like you're very it's very it feels very tender yeah like you touch that it's like ow you know I wouldn't want to pier that thing. What was that? Some hidden treats. Fuck, that's nasty. Referred to as hidden treats.
Starting point is 00:58:08 Oh, man. You know, I read something recently on Reddit. Careful. I read it on Reddit. It said a little piece of advice they heard from their dentist when they were a kid that always stuck with them and had been thinking about it nonstop. They were like, is it really important to floss your teeth? Dennis said Only floss the teeth you want to keep
Starting point is 00:58:33 Ooh That's good Stuck with me now I'm like shit You want to Because then you'll get gum shit And then that's one I don't lose my teeth
Starting point is 00:58:41 No Oh I mean you've seen a lot of actors They get those Veneers Yeah Veneers Bougie has some veneers They're beautiful too
Starting point is 00:58:49 They're absolutely beautiful Actually I don't even think Bougie has veneers I think Bougie did the thing We had all of his teeth removed and replaced Oh my God Because you know
Starting point is 00:58:56 Some people get the one They look very veneer-esque, though. You know the ones where people get that just goes on top? Some people get it where they actually have their teeth removed and then a new set of teeth put in. You'd think if they could just mold their teeth, it wouldn't look as odd, but I'm guessing... Well, it looks odd because they get them too perfect.
Starting point is 00:59:15 They get them too white? Too white and too perfect. No, I'd want them like, just take a mold of how they are, like the exact crookedness and everything. Make them a little wider, of course. A little bit wider, yeah. And then just plop them in. I don't need, you know, yeah, the ones where it's clearly just a, like a denture type thing.
Starting point is 00:59:32 A lot of celebrities have that now, where if you look at like a ton of celebrities, they have, their teeth are perfect. But it, but it's, it looks unnatural. And I feel like it could be one of those trends that goes away that we look back at in 20 years. And it stands out immediately because it's like, oh, my God. Garland has some. Is that the guy who plays Larry David's best friend on the show? He has some recently where I saw. where I saw him and I was like, whoa, he's got some chompers now.
Starting point is 01:00:01 I honestly, like, if you go back and you look at movies from like the 80s, 90s, even early 2000s, that's something like people didn't really have. They had, like teeth had more character and they are, you know, no one's teeth are perfect. Obviously, you people want to. Especially if you're British. Well, yeah, I mean, they're. That's just a default, though. Yeah, that's my default.
Starting point is 01:00:22 And I wouldn't even, when it comes to British people, I wouldn't even say, oh, their teeth aren't perfect. Because that's even giving them a little too much credit. It's like, do you even categorize those as teeth? Exactly. That's closer to what I was getting up. But I think that the perfect teeth is off-putting. And I think people need to let their teeth have some character. There's a little bit of crooked.
Starting point is 01:00:41 I'm not talking about like... One little tooth that's out more than the rest, you know? I got a snaggle tooth. And I used to be self-conscious about it. And as I got older, I was like, I think it would look weird if it was gone now. Because it feels like it's, I don't know. It's, uh, the crookedness of my teeth is, is not enough where I, I'm like, oh, but it's, you know, I'm like, I think we'll look weird if they were, if they were perfect. Same with you. You do have pretty, pretty straight teeth. Thanks, man. Pretty, well, I did have braces, but then I didn't wear my retainers, so they've kind of started to, I didn't have braces. I didn't have braces. Really? I, mm-mm. I had mine junior and senior year of high school. See, that was the thing. Wasn't that awesome? They told me, they never told. Did I have them off senior year? I think I got them off mid-s senior year somewhere, maybe. Oh, dude, right before college? Dude, glow up.
Starting point is 01:01:28 I can't remember the exact day. I had them on for like two years. See, I, uh, the dentist never told me I needed braces until they were like, yeah, actually, you probably sugar braces. And it was in the summer before I went off to college. And I was like, I'm not getting fucking braces to go off to college. Yeah. So, uh, yeah, here I am.
Starting point is 01:01:48 And I still got some crooked, cute. You look cuter for it, you know? I feel like, you're the way God made you. Exactly. And, you know, you got these dudes like, uh. Jeff. Garland, Boogie. Jeff Garland, boogie, clavicular, these guys who like focus so much on their, every aspect
Starting point is 01:02:03 of their face being so goddamn perfect, that's no way to live, man. That's miserable, you know? Haven't you ever watch a TV show or like a movie where like someone is like, oh, they look interesting and it's intriguing? It's like, oh, that's an interesting looking person. I am tired of seeing the kind of like influencer faces and period pieces and stuff, you know, like a, like when you see someone, and I don't mean to judge, and I hate doing this because they can't help.
Starting point is 01:02:33 I mean, they made the choice and they can do whatever they want. But it's like when someone like Nicole Kidman shows up in the Northman or like a character, just like a period piece where it's like people back then didn't have filler or reconstructed. It's like, and your face doesn't like naturally look like that. You know, you can tell when someone's had work done. Sometimes, you know, they get minimal work done and it's less obvious. And again, I'm not trying to like, this ugly bitch, why is she, you know. No, yeah.
Starting point is 01:03:00 I mean, I just, it takes me out of a movie. Sure. A period piece especially. Yeah. No, like I don't have any problem with people getting like work done on their face if they want to do that. But I do think that the, I think that dudes like the looks maxers that are so hyper-focused on every detail of their face being perfect. And, you know, that's, yeah, with the hammers on their face and shit, I feel like, and, you know, that's associated with being a real Chad. And you know what I think makes a real Chad?
Starting point is 01:03:33 A real Chad. A real alpha is someone that is not so self-conscious about the way they naturally look and they embrace it. And they're like, yeah, it's just me. That's confidence. That's fucking real Chadship right there. And you know, we have a lot of Chad's in our viewer base. In fact, they're listed right now. all of you can see.
Starting point is 01:03:56 And they're not just chads. These are chads with perfectly misaligned teeth. That's right. There's two lists on screen right now. If you look at the list with the emojis, those people, those are chads that have perfectly misaligned teeth. Where it's like slightly missing, you know, but it's like you look good.
Starting point is 01:04:15 It looks natural. Like we were talking about. Yeah. And then the other list, those are chads that, you know, they do have misaligned. teeth, but they're also not as They have the braces that are going on the inner, the inside of the teeth.
Starting point is 01:04:32 And they're, they're, you know, they think that if they fix the teeth, it's going to make them look better when really it's not, you know, the teeth were just, yeah, there's other things they should focus on. But we still love them regardless. Yeah, of course, you know, we still appreciate their support and, you know, all that comes with that, love and respect. I could lose some weight, but. Overall, yeah, I mean, they're beautiful.
Starting point is 01:04:54 All of you guys are beautiful. Even if you're not supporting us through Patreon and getting your name on the chat lists, you're still beautiful. Just listening to this show for free, that's enough. You know, that supports us. But if you do want to go the extra mile and get the funny brothers tickled pink with boyish glee, you can go to Patreon. Atcom slash SuperMega. Get extra servings of this podcast every week.
Starting point is 01:05:16 Get it ad-free. Get your name up in that bitch. And exclusive shows, stickers, all sorts of stuff. So should we... I'm gonna set it better myself. I was actually, I did a kind of impress myself with the brevity and the efficiency of that. Oh, okay. Well, now you've made it awkward for me.
Starting point is 01:05:39 Can you let me be proud of one goddamn thing? I do. My jeans. My fuck stop, dude.

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