supermegashow - Gigglenomics | supermegashow - 120

Episode Date: July 1, 2026

Editor Luke had to leave town to visit family on short notice, so apologies for any delays! Here's a yummy, juicy podcast episode in time for y'all. MWAH! Follow Matt: @matthwatson Follow Ryan: @elirymagee Follow the show: @supermegashow Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

What happens when two people who grew up in a very strange corner of Los Angeles look back and realize just how bizarre their upbringings really were? They start a podcast, of course. I'm Ashley Johnson. And I'm Talas and Jaffe. Before we became the internet people we are today, we spent our childhoods as working actors, appearing in shows like growing pains and films like Mr. Mom.

In our podcast, Weird Kids, we're diving deep into our unique upbringings, our friendship with each other, and all the delightfully odd interests we still carry with us today. In each episode, we get to share stories of our youth, the things that bring us joy, the problems that we face, and occasionally the friends we've collected along the way. If you're a misfit, an outcast, or just a weirdo who loves all things nostalgic and

unconventional, come take a seat at our table. Each week, we'll be releasing previously members-only episodes on YouTube and all major podcast platforms, with new episodes dropping exclusively and ad-free on beacon.tv. Welcome to the cold open guys That's right It's the cold open of the podcast It's a small segment Before the intro that's used to

Just skip it They don't care Luke Now it's back to the portion The meaty portion of the podcast The one that people care about right? Yeah Yeah you know When you go to a restaurant

And you get an appetizer Are you really that excited for you I mean depending on the appetizer That's true Blumen onion I knew you were going to say Bloom and Onion It's one of the best

best as I that in on the two best appetizers is one just the starting bread at outback that like brown pumpernickel bread or whatever the fuck it is yeah I know what's time I'm up and then uh the blooming onion god it's so good yeah I last time I had outback steakhouse I think was with you and Glendale which was in like maybe like 2018 it's very trashy in in Glendale comparatively to South Carolina South Carolina has a higher quality standard for their Outback Steakhouse, whereas L.A., there's so many places people can get steak. They don't give a shit. They're not, I don't know why, but in Harbison, Columbia, South Carolina, it probably isn't the same way today, but when I was young, there would be always a wait for Outback Steakhouse. No matter what.

That's the good shit. It is. I mean, it was. It was. In South Carolina, that's a fine dining experience, but in L.A., that's, you know. Well, South Carolina, Texas Roadhouse is a fine dining experience. well, you know, we're going out special Texas Roadhouse. Although Texas Roadhouse does, does slack. I haven't had it honestly. The last time, dude, when's the last time you've had Texas

Roadhouse? For me, it's probably never had it. Never? I've never been to Texas Roadhouse. There's one right in Harbison. Why, I didn't grow up in Harbison? Well, I mean, you're, I'm not saying you did. I'm saying, like, you live so close. I didn't live super close to Harbison. I didn't have a car. I just like a 20-something. Oh, you didn't have a car in college. Did you have to ask like your friends for rides? Well, I didn't really go anywhere You ride a bicycle? I would walk around campus I pretty much just stick to campus

Should have just hopped on a razor scooter And went down 26 to Harbison Just seeing you scoot Like on this side of the highway There's not even a place on the side of the highway To do it because the way The highway works in South Carolina It's like two lanes

And then just grass No, you got the white line on the edge I can stay on the white line Yeah I can, that's what it's for Scooting The white line is not to, you know, keep you in the lanes. It's for a razor scooter. It's a perfect white line for you to follow.

We got to definitely, at some point, just go back to South Carolina and just do a little vlog of back home, you know, half in Charleston and then half in like Irmo, South Carolina. That'd be awesome. I would love to do that. And then, you know, Greenville. No. I mean, it's better than it was. It used to be boring as hell.

When I was on tour, I was on tour. We drove through Greenville and we stopped there for lunch. And I got the classic. You know what I got. Grouchos. Okay. Yeah, because they put them all over the state now. God, I want grouchos.

I've been for grouchos whenever I'm in town. I just, one of my favorite things is just dipping the groucho chips into the... Dude, it's good. The sauce. I was about say the Area 51 sauce. STP sauce? It's like a something 45. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

I'll take your root 45 sauce I don't know It's it's like a good mayonnaise based sauce It's delicious It's like pink and has specs in it Pink with specs And I mean Since we started super mega

Like you've maybe even in like the first episode of the podcast You talked about grouchos It's so good We've talked about it so many times It's good But we stopped in Greenville And I remember being like Impressed by the

The come up the glow up that Greenville has had. Because when I was a kid, my grandparents lived near there in a tiny little trailer. It's just like old people country. Yeah, I would go out there and there was really nothing. Greenville and Spartanburg. Yeah, there was really nothing there. It wasn't too nice.

But now it's kind of like a, it's the hip new kid on the block in South Carolina. Yeah, it is. There's a big art and music scene there now, apparently. Oh, yeah, yeah. The New Atlanta. It is the New Atlanta, Greenville, South Carolina. Any listeners from Greenville? Well, it's near Clemson.

So, I mean, if you're a college kid going to Clemson, then you probably have family, you know. Well, I guess people come from all over. It's a really prestigious engineering school. You know who went to Clemson? Your dad? No. My dad went to college Charleston. He went to a liberal arts college?

My dad does liberal arts as a career. I know. Embarrassing. Ian, the rapper, went to Clemson. Mmm. Mmm. It's music engineering. Yeah.

Which is art. It is. Clemson, you know, they're known for engineering. And then when Ian enrolled, that's when they became known for art. They became a liberal arts college when he was there. I think he went for like agriculture. And then he's like, I'm a rap. That's a deep shift.

But I respect it. It is a steep shift. I mean, not every agricultural. can become a rapist. It reminds me of the legend of Troy. He was a young man who at his high school played basketball and was known as the basketball star. Okay.

But within him, little did he know, he had two lions. Really? One that wanted to play basketball and the other that wanted to be in a high school musical. Whoa, wait, wait, wait, wait. Those two things don't mix. Nope. Sports and musicals.

Sorry, I'm not seeing how he could have both those lines in them. And the only people that are in musicals are girls or girly boys. Right. And basketball is neither for girls or girly boys. So I think like one of the only people in those movies, like the guy who was like into drama was Sharpay's like brother Ryan, who was just like what, like the, what, it was a fedora.

He was wearing like a fedora and a little vest. That's what, you know, He was very queer coded. He was, he was. Is that how you said right? You don't say gay coded. Queer coded is a thing. Gay coded sounds almost like I feel like I, if I said gay coded, someone we go, what?

Gay code. And I'd be like, no, no, no, I don't mean it like that. No. But dude, that foot, I actually was talking to my girlfriend about this recently. I was like, what if I, I mean, how would you feel if I started, you know, doing the fedora and the vest? with, you know, like the sleeveless vest with like the white button-up shirt underneath. Or like a, they have different color.

You know, it's all about the vest, like the complement of the long-sleeve button-up shirt underneath. The vest has to match the fedora though. Yes. Usually it's like a black or dark gray striped fedora. Yeah. And that's a, that's, the shirt has to be tight too. This is from an era where, like, loose clothes were, they were out.

Can you have a belt with like shine and gems or something on it? People rhinestones. Yes, a rhinestones, though. Fuck yeah. And if I can't afford that, maybe I'll bedazzle it. I've never bedazzled anything. Have you? No, but I always, low-key, though.

It was marketed towards girls. I know. So that's why I... I'm not going to lie, though. I watched the commercials come on TV for, like, the bedazzling stuff, and I was like, damn, that looks fun. I want to make stuff shiny. I want to put little gems on everything and make it sparkle, but I couldn't go,

hey, dad, can I get the bedazzle kit? Go, what the... What? Only if you bedazzle my nails, son. I'll get the... I was just to take the Hot Wheels track. How about a nice football? How about mouse trap?

It's a fun little board game. How about Don't Wake Daddy? That was a fun board game. That's the stuff we need to play whenever we actually get some balls and start that board game shin dig. Dude, I would love to play. I don't think I've ever played Don't Wake Daddy.

Like have some serious games in there where it's like a little, you know, more of like a podcasty vibe and then have, because the more simpler games like Don't Wake Daddy or like life, they're always, I feel like has to be a spin because they're not so complex. Well, I've always wanted to do the idea we play life, but we just remake all the cards with our own stuff on it. It's a good idea. So all the careers are different, all the whatever.

And see how it turns out. Or maybe you get fans submitted ones. True. Just compile them all. That would be fun. Yeah. And then, uh, we, We get Luke or Darwin to pick them out, so we don't even know what they're going to be.

And then we play them. I don't know if I trust Luke. Yeah, I don't know if I trust Luke either. He's probably just going to take all of them out and then write in his name. I'll give Luke a million dollars in real life. It's like off. This one again. Play rock paper scissors with Luke.

Winner gets a million dollars in real life. Luke, we don't have a million dollars. But he's good at rock paper scissors. He is. I think he has something like something with his, Have you seen that like his temples have swollen? I think his brain, I think he's learning more.

I think his brain's gotten bigger. Could be a medical condition because I don't know. Your brain's inside your skull. The veins are, right, but your brain is inside your skull, which is solid. So if the brain's getting bigger,

it's just going to press on the inside of his skull, which is a very serious medical issue. The bulging veins and stuff, he might just have high blood pressure. It's still intellectually intimidating, though. It is. Regardless. Because he shaved his head too, so we walked in the office.

He has these fucking throbbing veins going down the side of his head. We're shaped the top of his head. He still has the size of his hair, I get it. Some of it, yeah. But he probably doesn't want us spilling all his tea on the podcast. No, he's trying to surprise people with the new Luke. I almost said Luke. Luke, Luke, Luke, look.

Come on, Luke's look. Yo, we should start doing a weekly second. Lucky Luke's look. Lucky Luke's look. That's a hard one to say. Looky. Lucky Luke's luck. Look.

Fuck. That's hard. Lucky Luke's look. Fuck. Lucky Luke's look. Yep, there it is. You know? And every week we can have a segment where Luke walks down a catwalk.

Shows off his look of the week. Well, it only works if he really enjoys this one food. But we could nickname him Limeabine Luke and extend it even more. Look. Lucky Limeabine Luke. Luke's look. Sorry. Fuck.

Give it to the bean. Just like it. Lima and then, but he flies every week to Lima, Peru to shoot it. So it's look or looky. Lima, Lucky Luke's look in Lima with a llama. Yeah, that's right. You didn't see that one coming. Now we're getting somewhere.

Yeah, we're getting somewhere. God, I don't know why we don't teach improv classes in Los Angeles County. Do you, I mean, the funny brothers school, it already sounds like an imp, like, we're the funny brothers and eventually like when our business grows it will be like a like pet boys it'll have our faces on it so it's like there will always be other funny brothers and sisters and siblings but when you look at that logo you're like oh but that is the funny brothers and originally they taught the classes they don't teach anymore no they're um i think one of them's homeless uh the other one no one's heard from in years but they did teach some good improv classes it's like

No one's heard from him in years. He does stand up comedy, just like he doesn't have any friends and no one to communicate with really. No one really likes him. You know, our, um, Milo, um, they... Unopoulos? No, no, not Unopolis. Hello, it's... Oh, God, yes.

Has it has come up with two great, uh, terms that, uh, really it's like, I feel, I feel like if we ever start an improv class, we would just have to hire them to do the branding. is brace for improv and gigglenomics. I remember the brace for improv on stream. Brace for Improv is genius. That was, so Funny Brothers present brace for. See, Brace for Improv should be like a themed show that the Funny Brothers Improv School puts on.

Brace for Improv. Honestly, like that, Gigalomics is the course that you take. Giggleomics. And then at the end of Gigglenomics, you get to be in a Brace for Improft show. Yep. You know, it's like that's your big like final exam. It's great though.

Race for improv. I mean, the, I mean, think about it. I think if you and I put just a little bit of money, rented out some studio space, put some flyers out, we'd get a few suck people. We would. We absolutely would. Dude, in L.A.? Dude, I bet you could, we could put up some, the worst looking bullshit flyers for like acting classes. And we would probably, our voicemail would be full by the end of the day.

It's Los Angeles. Everyone comes here. They want to be an actor. People walk into a whiteboard. So I walk into a room with a whiteboard And on it just says yes And dot dot dot question mark And then everyone's in the class

You pick someone out and you go Yes What? Rule number one You never shut down a yes and Get out get the fuck out of my classroom Is it playing? Is the computer on? Is it

Yes It's plain, it's plain That one's just on animated Sorry, we had a moment of crisis on the set for one of our set pieces. We were scared that maybe the video was not playing, but it is. It is low. Our breakfast sandwiches are seven minutes away. Bro, our breakfast sandwiches are seven minutes away?

Yep. You got to be freaking me. Which means, you guys, you know, we're going to, I mean, it's probably going to take a bit longer because people always get lost going through the maze of a... We live in a labyrinth. Yeah. We don't live here. Well, I mean, times... We spend sometimes just as much time.

here as we do at home, if not more during the holidays. Oh, yeah. Sleeping doesn't count. No. I used to, I used to, I used to pull all-nighters here, a good bit. And then I was like, you know what? I need to get my sleep under control because of my sleep hygiene. It's weird that it's called that sleep hygiene.

Makes it sound like it's some kind of. It's something you could brush, but you can't. You can't brush your sleep. You can, theoretically, you can, you know, If you use it in a metaphor or something, you could brush yourself to sleep. You know, you're brushing your mind to sleep. Yeah, sure.

I do, my sleep has gotten a lot better. Just kind of forcing myself to stick to a better routine. Because I, this sounds so dumb to say. I, I, it wasn't until like semi recently, I realized truly how obviously sleep is important, obviously. But like, I guess just there's more research and just just how actually fucking important sleep is to every single part of your life. Like your hormones, your, the way you feel your mood, X, Y, and Z. So I've been trying to make that better.

I take my magnesium glycinate before bed. Okay. It doesn't, I don't notice any difference. But it's supposed to be good. Some people swear by it. I feel like you are right. That was dumb to say. Race for improv!

Yeah. Yeah, that's good shit, right? Now, it rarely... I like there being like a legendary move in improv that's only been like done once by like the funny brothers, but it was used as a last resort. It's the yes, it's like the no and. And no one's ever even been able to attempt it.

Well, if you have attempted it, but none have succeeded. Yeah, we try, but it just stops the sketch right in its tracks. Then we're all scrambling and... Would it no and just be shutting someone's bit down and then starting your own new bit? Yeah, literally. It's just like, like, man, it... Like, you throw something at me and I'll no end it back to you. Man, it's raining cats and dogs out here.

No, it's not. That's just water. I think something's wrong with your head. Well, that still feels like a yes and. because you're still on the same subject. True. Okay, I'll really shut it down. Throw me something. Throw me something again.

I'll pull off a no-and. Woo! It's a scorcher today. No, I don't think so. Working in this ice cream parlor in the North Pole is pretty freezing work. And since that there's a giant dome around us

and we can't see the sun, I don't even know how you're experiencing warmth or heat. Especially since we have the air conditioning turned up all the way. You're still on the same subject, though. You're still working with what I gave you. Yeah, but I'm canceling any sort of, like,

you're starting a scene while it's warm out here. And then I'm saying, no, I'm doing my scene. I mean, you're technically always going to get a yes if it's, if you're going off of something. I guess the best way to do it would be, no, I'm flying a plane and you're on the ground. But that just doesn't, I don't think anyone actually pulls that one off. I think when people, like in class accidentally do a no and, it's always kind of like shutting down like whatever you said and I'm going to do what I'm doing. Like I'm not going to take any sort of inkling from your idea.

There's nothing I'm going to take. And I'm just going to make it all about me. Yes. And. Huh? I'm yes and. Are you? Yeah, I said yes.

I didn't see where that was going. I said yes and. And what? You're no anding me, dude. You shut. it down. And what? You reverse yes-anded me.

It was just confusing because it wasn't any, it wasn't like a part of the conversation at all. It was just a stilted yes-and. It threw me off. See, I just no-ended you. Masterfully, dare I say, threw you off. No-ending is a cooperative thing still to make the scene work.

That's why it's so rare is because people flounder while doing it. No. And? No. Yes. but still now. You win. I give up.

I know. I can't come back from that. You made me look like a damn fool in front of our audience. Thanks. Thanks a lot, dude. Now everyone in the class is going to respect you as their improv teacher

a lot more than me. You had to do that on the first fucking day. I'm going to be the first face on the billboard too. I'm going to make you a tiny bit smaller. No, no, no, no. Your head's just going to shrink about like two inches. My head is smaller than yours in real life, but that doesn't mean that my head on the logo has to be smaller.

You'll actually, you'll be standing behind me with your shoulders, with your hands on my shoulders. Peaking out? Peaking out from behind me. And I'll have my arms crossed. And it's going to be done in a caricature style, like done at the boardwalk. So there's really no sense of actual scale. So I'm really, really small behind you. Yes.

And you're just gigantic. And you're smiling. I'm frowning. And you're like, well, it's the classic drama face. You know, the masks? The smile and the frown? My mom had those when I was young and they were creepy. She actually had the real ones?

Like just emotionless, just kind of like happy, sad. And then like a, it was like two or three masks with different emotions. They were always hanging up on a wall in our older home. And they just always creep me out. Especially the one that was frowning with an open mouth. The like sad frowning acting mask is very scary. Like it's very, very scary. Reminds me of that, um, that creepy, uh, Claymation Kids cartoon.

You know what I'm talking about? It's like a clip on YouTube that everyone on. Coraline? No, it's not Coraline. It's old. Franklin Leaney. The scariest kids show ever. I mean, it's like some like creepy mask.

Sean the sheep. It's not Sean the sheep, unfortunately. Sean the sheep is scary though. Sheep shouldn't be able to do all that stuff. The wear chicken? It's none of those things. Or whatever it was?

No. Was that the movie? I actually don't know what it's called, but it's like, the wear sheep. It's like some kids in some weird like interdimensional void with some like creepy fucking mask

that's like changing its face. Stranger things. It's not, well, close but it's not stranger things but uh honestly dude we should do a whole claymation episode of the podcast but it has to be done by us yeah and we we have to like literally just change the mouth for every single syllable and consonant and we could do it with plato we could do what the uh the robot chicken people do and they cut out the mouths we unlike paper and then they just swap and just use dolls for us i loved that that they did that i loved like the

the paper changing. And I actually, my first video I ever uploaded on YouTube was... Use that effect? Yeah, it was a... It was like inspired by robot chicken. And it was like a claymation I made that was shot on my dad's like work desk. Shot from like the Macs webcam. And I would just like press start and stop really fast to make it work.

And I cut out mouths and I would just like stick it to the character and change it. It was pretty dope. Sounds pretty dope. Sounds like you were having a ball. I was having a ball. Mostly to me, it sounds like you were stealing Seth Green's ideas. And I'm sure at the,

you didn't give him any credit in the description. Well, I mean, he didn't come up with claimation. The mouth thing is like, I know no other animation studio that does the, do the mouths like that.

South Park? I think they're, I mean, South Park is just now actually just animated. Yeah, but it used to be back in the day when they did it as a short film as like a pilot thing to show off. And they did, but they did it before a robot chicken did.

But now it's, it's, it's, but robot chicken did it with dolls. They did these with paper cutouts that was easy because they could have it lying flat. Getting these mouths, sometimes they'd probably fall off. Yeah, that had to be a pain in the ass. Especially on these dolls and you're moving them all, so like, just seeing the mouth like, just drop. Like, oh, damn it. Fuck. Honestly, the production of robot chicken had to be pretty, pretty brutal, pretty intense.

I had a, like, a DVD collection at one. point that had like a behind the scenes where you kind of saw and like with any stop motion I think they had the you know the the time lapse of like what it takes for a scene I dude the most impressive time lapses are from like a yeah likea

whenever you see like the guys moving around really fast and you see like the because they create big they create like I guess yeah the huge animatronic type thing sometimes like in what was the there's one big one was it Cuba Kubo in the two strings that had the really big thing.

It was like a dragon or so. I can't remember. And like honestly, claymation is something like I really don't see that much of anymore. Just stop motion. A show like robot chicken could never be made today. And I don't mean that in the way that we're too woke. I mean that in the way that just I don't think a studio,

like a network is willing to fund a show that takes that much work. No, they want something quicker. They want rigged animation, which, you know, no, no slight on like, because there's a lot of people who like works in. Yeah, but like that's mostly like they want something quick. Yeah. Something to churn out quickly. And having to, you know, a whole team doing stop motion is just something that I feel like a network is just like, yeah, but why?

Why? Which sucks. Because stop motion is genuinely such a cool art form. That's why it was like really cool to see in the first episode, I think it was the first episode of Hunters, kind of. of like show. Right, right. He's doing with like the house and the puppets and everything. There was like, there's all sorts of animation in that.

There's like regular 2D animation. It looks like there's some 3D renders and then as well as, I guess, the part that I'm connecting to, which is the stop motion bit with the flowers on the tree or whatever. Yeah, that's so sick. It's like, and you know instantly that it's like stop motion. There's like this, it's the frame rate and everything. But like, there's something very nostalgic about it too. Because we also grew up at a time with like the Rudolph.

a Christmas special, even though that's old. But I don't know if those are experienced the same way that we experience them, because usually we'd catch those on TV and it would just be running. And now it's like, not a lot of people have cable television or use it. So maybe they're just like watching Christmas move. Like, I'm going to put on Frozen for the kids for Christmas. Instead of it just being like ABC families having a Christmas story on, watch it. There was something so special, which I guess is gone now because now I guess you can just get them on streaming services.

So it's whenever you want it. But back in the day, every like Charlie Brown special, like Halloween or Christmas or Thanksgiving, I would get so excited for it. Like I'd look in the newspaper to see when it was airing. And I'd be like, oh my God, it's this Thursday. And I'd be excited all week for it. And then I would have to catch it when it aired. And a SpongeBob episode. Yeah, in the SpongeBob episode.

We both experienced the same thing where it creeped us out. And we didn't like that. They were portraying Santa Claus as a crazy lunatic. They shouldn't have. They fucked up. That's where I started backing away from SpongeBob. I said, I don't know if I can do this anymore. Hold on.

I got our breakfast sandwiches here? Not yet. Still? It's been more than seven minutes. It's been more than seven minutes. But, you know, sometimes it... Got it. Is he nearby?

For sure. Yes. It keeps telling me to thank your delivery person. Delays don't happen often. That means they're here. But Jordan waited while the store finished preparing your order. The latest arrival time was 425. I don't have my watch.

I keep doing that, dude. I don't want my watching it in a few weeks. Oh, it was delivered. Let's go. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Now we're watching the few movie to go. Welcome back, everyone.

As a surprise, for you letting us indulge in our breakfast sandwiches, we'll allow you a secret viewing of our security tapes of Luke indulging himself in our restrooms. Oh, yeah. It'll be on Patreon by the end of the day We got the tapes Luke Sorry Luke Right here Yep

For the audio listeners We're not making that up So they know I mean business Yeah That's a real tape right there I'll put it right here Yeah Just so just so

So people know you mean business It's not going nowhere You know what I'm saying Dude that was a That was a yummy Breakfast sandwich It was It was a good egg

Great bacon And bacon's epic And decent cheese I would say great bacon decent egg Good cheese Yeah It was a

It was epic bacon though I find it like It's very rare where I'm like Fuck that egg was Oh my God It's always like a nice part to have for me But like I've never had like a place That blew my mind

I guess with their eggs For me it's scrambled egg Is never going to do that If especially yeah Especially if it's a liver But if it's like an egg that's like, I don't know, like over easy or something on a bagel?

A deviled egg? Does that count or is that too much not of an egg at that point? Well, isn't the isn't the whipped filling of a deviled egg made from the yolk? Or am I? It's from the yolk and then you mix of like some mayonnaise, mustard, some pickle juice if you want. All that good stuff.

Honestly, a deviled egg counts. Still counts. Okay. I just found out I can actually feed my snake. Devil's eggs? Hard-boiled eggs. Oh, can I make Lenny a deviled eggs? You can make one of the deviled egg.

We'll see if he'll take it. Can he eat mustard and mayonnaise? Probably not. I would be willing to bet no. Can snakes eat mustard and mayonnaise? Hey, only one way to find out. That is true, dude. Ryan brought his famous deviled eggs over.

I'm going to make him like a Lenny-sized too. They're going to be like a little tiny like quail eggs. Yeah, you need to find the smallest eggs you can find. Quail eggs are tiny, right? Quail eggs are like that. Okay, good. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Or robin eggs?

It sounds like a seal for a second. Or a seal for a second. You went or or or or or, or, uh, yeah, but Lenny, uh, I mean, he's in an awkward, uh, growth stage right now where he hasn't quite moved up to the next size of food. So I'm having, I'm giving him, so he eats pinkies. He still eats pinkies. He's still eats pinkies. But I give him two per meal. What would you, what, what, what's the move up from pinkies for a corn snake? Uh, is it just more pinkies? Uh, no, they're, um, they're either hoppers or fuzzies. I don't remember. Hoppers? Mm-hmm. Bugs? No, no, no, no, no, no. It's just, bigger mice. Oh. Bigger frozen mice. I get these little hoppers and fuzzies. Are like hoppers like field mice?

I feel like fuzzies are the next size up and then it's hoppers. I don't know. Are hoppers like the field mice that have like big long legs that look like little rabbit mice? I'm not sure, but I will find out because he can get up to six feet. He's still a little guy though. He's, he's, I was looking at pictures of when I first got him and he's, uh, he's definitely like doubled in like length.

How old was he when you, when you got? on him. He was a little less than a year. He was like six months maybe when I got. He's a little baby corn snake. He's gorgeous. What's full, how long does it take? Usually full like adult growth. I don't know what the timeline is because I think it just depends on their diet and their enclosure, but I know they can get up like six feet. He's, he's my little boy, man. How thick he get? I've been holding them a lot more. He can get as long as you, just about. Just about, yeah. But how thick, how, how they can get pretty fat. Because right now what?

He's like that? No, no, no, no, no, no. Really? No, he's like this? Dude, he's like that. Oh, okay, okay. I was about to say, no, he's, he's tiny.

He's very small. And he probably could get to this. He maybe. The audio listeners going, what the fuck? Is he making his fingers bigger or smaller? He says that. Yeah, but he, um,

he's a beautiful little, little orange corn snake. And I'll never forget. I went to FedEx to go pick him up and there's a little little box cut it open opened it up there's some like some stuff

I said it I move it aside and he's just there looking up at me and I was like hey buddy he flick his tongue go mm-hmm he went dude he every time I hold him though he uh he freaks out at first

when I when I get him uh I get him with my teeth I go and um dude he's strong for how little he is like when he when he really wants to get away shit

yeah dude he he like he can tints up all his muscles in a way that's like whoa pretty crazy i also found out that they're constrictors corn snakes and i could find i i learned that because it happened just randomly one day usually when i go to feed him a a pinky which is just a it's a it's a it's a little for those who are wondering it's like a it's i guess when they breed mice a bunch are born that don't actually end up uh being alive they freeze those and then i i buy them and then i I thaw them and I give them to Leonard. And I dangle it in front of him.

And usually he just goes and grabs it. But sometimes he'll, he will grab it so fast and like in midair wrap around it. So it's like, it's really crazy. Oh, damn. It's, you got to take a video of that and send it over. I have videos. I, uh, of him like doing the quick rap shit. It's fast.

Tail whip. That's what he's doing. It's literally like one frame. It's like, such a small little brain. Does it make you jump every time? It doesn't make me jump. Did it ever make you jump?

Like the first time you saw it? First time, I thought there was something wrong with him. Because when he hit the ground with it, because he like, he jumps up, grabs it, constricts it in midair. But then when he hit the ground, he kept wrapping around it. So he started like kind of flailing about.

And I was like, oh, he's okay. He's just wrapping around it. He had to give him a little CPR. Yeah. Honestly, if he choked, I don't, I don't know what I would just squeeze him like a tube of toothpaste to get it back out. stretch your mouth

swing up around the momentum will eventually dislodge it and send it out and if that doesn't work CPR, I blow them up like a balloon Like Fiona and Shrek Exactly Exactly No but I don't abuse my snake

I love my snake Yeah He's a sweet little guy I've had him about a year now A little over a year I got him in May 2025 So he's about two years old Just about, yeah. And how, what's the life of a snake?

It's like 10 years, 20 years? It, 30? It varies. It's not that long. I want to say corn snakes, I used to know this and I forgot. I want to say it's like 10 to 15. Okay, so kind of like a dog. Yeah, yeah.

Almost in terms of life expectancy. But yeah, we got to, we got to make them some tiny little deviled eggs. I'll do it. If you can have mustard mayonnaise and, uh, some pickle juice and you know i you probably can't but but maybe we can we can we can we can whip up the the egg yolk to be to look like it you're telling me a snake would see a deviled egg on like a picnic table and not want to go after it it probably would probably see it and go hmm i just i saw someone on the corn snake subreddit uh feeding their snake hard-boiled egg and he was

loving it dude for some reason in my head like i i feel like snakes it's almost uh like cats do they get more excited if like their praise moving around like their instincts are more like if something's running around that's like that's what they're geared yeah i have to i have to dangle the uh i have to like when i get the pinky on the tongs and i put it in there i have to like i kind of like i tease them with it so i'll like kind of get it close and then move it away like a fish kind of like yeah and then i'll just kind of like sometimes i'll like put it kind of in the leaves and like and like and then i see slithers out and he looks at it and he's like who starts going real slow staring at it and he starts flicking

his tongue and I'll be like that super focus like dude and you can always tell when he's about to do it because then he'll start getting close and like very very slowly go it's fast it's crazy that's how he'd be in the wild if he was hunting and then he swallows that thing whole and stretches his entire face to be like three times the size of him it's crazy it's very funny uh but he's a cute little guy he's a very cute little guy i wish i could bring him in and have him on the podcast just wrapped around my neck we haven't had enough pictures of lenny on the podcast throw up a picture of lenny no Well, Luke apparently has never shown a picture of Lenny because every time he's shown Lenny from the Simpsons

is what he told me. So I'm not even going to send him a picture of Lenny because I know what he's going to do. People probably think I've been lying this whole time. At no point as that. I don't think so. Really? I think he said every single time he's shown Lenny from the Simpsons.

What if that was an accident? Because he's like, I don't know who Lenny is. Like not really listening at the time. We don't remember about this snake? What's he talking about? What's up Lenny from the Simpses? Is that the guy's like, hey, Homer. Yep. That guy. Hey, Alma.

Linney and Carl. Oh, good. That's, I mean, it got me to laugh. Hey, it, you know, for all the snake enthusiasts out there, though, they're not laughing. They're shedding tears. How about this is what a corn snake looks like. Luke throw up a picture of a corn snake. That's what Lenny kind of looks like. Luke's seen Lenny, so Luke will just have to find one that he thinks probably looks the most like him. He's just any of them. No, I know. I mean, corn snakes vary widely. There's like so many different colors and patterns. Yeah, but Luke,

it's just going to be... Yeah, that is... It's not going to be a cornucine. It's going to be like a fucking, like, lime green. Like, pipe. I don't know what's lime green. What's a snake that's lime green? Smooth green snake. That's really what it's called.

The smooth green snake. Because when I first wanted a snake, that was the one I wanted was a smooth green snake because they, uh... A, the name's funny, but they're cute. They're like lime green. Then there's the rough. green snake. Yeah.

But then I read about the care instructions for them, and a smooth green snake is substantially harder to take care of than a corn snake. There's a certain head shape of a snake. There's like the cute head shape, which I will say in a way, like the cobras still have that almost same like corn snakey. Like they're in that family. And then there's the like there's a rattlesnake, the wide-jawed kind of family of snakes. I don't know what those are like.

I don't know the different families and the descriptors of each varying tree or whatever But snakes I'm pretty sure that like The poisonous ones do have a different head shape It's more like It's like wide Yeah it's wider and more like diamondy

We're like like Lenny's head It's just like a little woo Like a tear job Like a little salamander Yeah exactly And he's got these big bug eyes They're so cute And I'm nervous that when he gets bigger

He's gonna develop those like Evil angry snake eyes You know what some of them get Where it just looks like they're always like where they have a brow yeah exactly see those those other snakes that we're talking about with those jaws or whatever they have those brows those thick mean

villain brows yeah like it looks like someone drew like angry eyebrows on them essentially yeah when he doesn't have that he just has like beanie baby eyes just like large orange bug eyes he would have the very soft like uh just

upside down smile eyebrows where they're just like a semi-circ like a light semicircle line he's going hey you know I could get a if he ever develops those angry eyes then to counteract it I'll get a sharpie and I will draw eyebrows on him that will you know be in a in a position that makes him look one up one like yeah so it looks like he's always just kind of like yeah so when he's slithering around his enclosure and I go and take a look at him I'm not like oh man he looks suspicious it's like it looks like it looks like it looks like he's

wandering. Yeah, he's like, he's lost and thought. She thinks he's sly, I bet. He's flicking his tongue. Dude, I will say, though, because I put a ring camera in his tank. He, because he's getting older, it's, this spring, it was, it was like, I guess his first real mating season.

So he would go cruising for ladies at night. And for some reason, his, he would climb up the, like, the crack of the tank and then try to, then he would inchworm his way like along the top like corner. Oh, is this when he would like fall? You just hear him go, you send me videos. Dude, it's so funny. You sent me one one night where it's like it happened to get or something. You don't even see him.

I mean it's just boom. Yeah, he just falls. Just right in front of the camera. Yeah. He does it over and over and over again. Hey, he's, uh, he's trying to be a little escape artist. He is, dude. He, he, he likes slither.

Dude, oh my God. I went to go open his tank recently. And I look. in and I don't see him and I'm like oh he's in his like one of his hideouts and I open the glass doors and as I like open them he just goes like half buddy but he's still

hanging on halfway so he's just hanging down scared these shit out of me because he was literally like hiding right above the top of the glass and then when I opened and he dropped down he's working his abs eventually he'll be able to do it dude you see in the video especially if you scrub through it um fast you can see how much like

his abs are going like it's like it's very funny And then he just drops. He loses his strength. I wish snakes had like a little noise like Oh! Yeah, just like a little squeak or something. What was it?

We were played something recently where like something screamed that shouldn't have... Was it in what we were playing yesterday in Spore? Bacteria. Oh yeah, it was the bacteria. We ate another bacteria and it was like... Yeah, yeah, yeah. What I'm out like if bacteria could actually scream? That was fun. That was a fun game, Spore.

Dude, I really enjoyed Spore. I want to play that again. I could definitely, now that we know more about it. Yeah, we did lose our save progress. We could start anew. So we, if you guys want to see it, we'd love to maybe do a pre-recorded spore series on the channel. We know how a lot of you love those pre-recorded last plays, huh?

Y'all go, yippee! And maybe some confetti and little like, what are those again? The little party blowers. the not the Brazilian thing they go Oh yeah They also make the noise

Just a Is that just a party A party horn? Oh you know it was very disappointing As a kid getting those Except it was just the ones that went out With no noise So it was just

It was That's no fun Or if you If you messed ears up If you broke it And then you try to blow into it And nothing happens It's like trying to take a sip

Out of a drink with a broken straw It's like what the fuck is happening? There's no liquid coming up. It sucks. It really sucks. It pisses me off. Or drinking out of a...

It hasn't... It's not the same effect. I just wanted to mention. I still don't like it to this day. And I will always make sure these people know. Paper straws. I don't want to be eating my straw.

I don't want it shedding into my mouth as I'm sipping. The paper pulp's the best part. It's the gift that keeps on giving. The paper pulp is the best part. Dude, it's... Paper straws piss me off to know. and I feel like a lot of places stop doing that. The peons have to suffer so the rich look good.

Exactly. It's literally an example of, you know, paper straws are not responsible for all the waste. The very, very, very large corporations produce so much more waste. But they put it back on the consuming. They go, no, bad. No, no, no. Now you have to sip your Coke with a paper straw. That'll disintegrate in the next 30 minutes.

So better drink it fast. Let's get some Coke flavored paper bits. It's like, you know. It's kind of like boba. Yeah. With shredded bits of paper. Mmm. It's organic.

I love that the straws dissolve as it sits in the drink. Oh, it's awesome. Wonderful. And my favorite is when it dissolves enough where where the straw enters the lid just basically becomes a choke point. Or then it like basically bends in half. Yeah. All right. Mine just came in half one time.

I was like, I tried to like reposition it and just and I was like, all right. And the rest of it dropped into my drink. just make us edible straws at that point yeah make them out of candy like those uh the dipsticks you know yeah they did make a dude do you remember oh my god they would dissolve in the water again

but at least it would be a pleasurable experience you can use the Twizzlers a straw you can just bite off the ends imagine dragons a great band no but do you remember we were kids there were those cereal straw

that were like, you could eat the straw, but it was made for like drinking milk. Yes. Yeah, dude. I never used them for cereal. I would just, I would just binge them. I just take it. Because they had the lucky charms ones,

fruity pebbles. I like the chocolatey cereal ones. Those were always like the best. I think that cinnamon toast crunch, cinnamon toast can. Which those cereal straws are just an old person candy made into like just more unhealthy because they do have,

like you know those. cylindrical tubes that have like the chocolate whatever that's just those. I don't know what those are called but it's like those are good too. They are good dude it's always a flaky outer cookie yep it's in a with some chocolate inside. It's just like a fucking old person's like cylindrical metal tin

you pop the top off and you're like but God forbid dude it's the worst feeling ever you pop one of those open it's got like sewing needles and shit inside not with the cookies not this isn't like a luck of the draw there's a bin of like what's what used to be for cookies or some sweets and then it's used for storage.

You know, it's sweet and it's a, you know, it looks cute, you know, in a photograph maybe. I get, I get, I get that elderly people are very pragmatic and they like to reuse things, um, like my grandma would fucking save yogurt cups and wash them in the dishwasher

and then put them up in the cabinet for when I wanted some like water. She'd give me, she would give me Pepsi and a, like, yo play cups. That's awesome. That's so good. And I, you're like activia. I'd be like, okay. See, my grandmother on my dad's side always had those like very small jar, the Muppet jar cups. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Those where it was like Fawzy and it just. That's classic. Kermit. I'm trying to remember all the Muppets names now. Lady Pig. Who's the one that says, meet me. Bozo? Yep.

Gonzo? Gonzo, yeah. But basically, I know old people like to reuse things. I get it. They grew up in a generation where they were forced to, you know? The Great Depression,

all that, all that jazz. But it should be, we should sign something into law that it should be illegal for old people to reuse something that cookies or candy came in because it gets my hopes up every time.

I must have a sign on it that says not edible. Not cookies or candy. Even not edible, I go, cookies are edible. They're just trying to throw me off. Just say,

not cookies, no cookies inside. It should just be down there. I would just think that they're trying to make me think that there's not cookies inside and I'd still check it thinking that there might be cookies that someone's trying to hide from me. Which is why it should be banned.

Because otherwise, yeah, I would think that they're just, they know I like, they know my white ass likes cookies and candy and they're going to be like, oh, well, I want them all for myself and he comes over and eats them. So I'm going to put not, not edible, but he's going to check anyway. I need some time to stew more on this hypothetical. We'll be right back after these ad reads. I just need the ponder for a little bit. No, I understand.

Death penalty? We're about to go see an alien movie today, aren't we, Matt? Right after we finish recording this episode, we're going to see Stephen Spielberg's Disclosure Day, which, by the way, Ryan, on the UFO subreddit, I heard them saying that the Roswell footage in the movie, allegedly, someone gave Stephen Spielberg real Roswell footage of aliens and he snuck it into the movie. Really? Yeah. It's the most gullible marketing shit I've ever heard. It's like, yeah, he put the real footage. He stuck it in.

Well, unfortunately, we won't be able to, you know, review it for y'all. I mean, it's going to be the page, because we're recording the members only on a separate day. We should probably definitely talk about it on the main podcast, though. But next episode, you'll hear all about it.

You'll hear some alien shit. I'm just looking for a basic Spielbergian alien movie. I want my gray aliens. I want my flying saucers. I don't want any. I give up the saucers just for a gray, just to make sure that it's a gray and not some, It is.

Bullshit. Okay. It is. It's in the trailer. Yeah, but like they could pull like they did with, uh, nope. Nope. Where it's like, oh, that looks like an alien. Yeah, that's an alien.

And it's not. It's just a little kid with a mask. Watch it be some shit where it's like, it's not actually gray aliens. It's us from the future. Still fine, I guess, you know, because. Yeah, I mean, maybe grays are us from the future. They look like us. A little fucked up, but.

Do you think love will be, uh, will act as like the, fourth dimension? The tying force in this movie. Love conquers all, even aliens. And that's actually how they win against the aliens, because the aliens are incapable of love. But humans, on the other hand, we can experience love, and that's why we win.

They evolved out of love because love hindered our progression. Yeah. Something, I don't know. I mean, what's the last, we're probably losers for this, but the last alien movie that you and I actually enjoyed was the Phoenix Rising movie Yeah, 2017. We should rewatch.

Imagine us rewatching going, yeah, this sucks. I hope not. I don't remember thinking it was really cool, especially the ending. Yes. Because it was like, it was a,

I don't want to give, I'm not going to spoil it, but it, it pulled off the, this isn't what you think it is well with an alien movie, whereas like, nope just made me feel like, fuck.

I need to watch Nope again because the idea of it being, the alien itself being this giant, thing is fun. That we are our opinion, like the only other person that shared it was fucking loading I know. I'm like, God damn it. I mean, it's a pretty brain dead.

I mean, where do the people go? Just give us a, I just want to see a gray alien. Why does he flying saucer? All this mumbo jumbo interdimensional. No, I just want a flying saucer and alien. Well, I like mumbo jumbo interdimensional shit. But I want them to be gray aliens. I don't want some movies always try to skirt around the gray alien.

Ever since, I guess, just like it was kind of like been there, done that. from like 50s, cinema, 60s, you know? It's almost like it's seen as a, oh, that's too cheesy. But it's like, I don't know, all the fucking abduction reports always tend to say that.

Crystal skull did it. You know, Crystal Skull had an alien and people didn't like it. What did? Oh, Crystal Skull. I liked that. I remember being, that's not a human school.

Taken out because I never watched an Indiana Jones movie before that. So, maybe like on TV, like, as an aside. But I was just kind of like, I just didn't know that the Indiana Jones universe was that fantastic.

I thought that he was just going searching for treasures. Right. But then in the other movies you find out that it's like there's this gem that disintegrates people at some point in one of the movies. You know, there's always been a fantastical element. But I wasn't expecting it because I thought Indiana Jones was just like an American crocodile Dundee. Going into a pyramid and stealing some gold and running back out.

Yeah. Well, I mean, the new one literally is time travel. I know. I didn't see it. It was good. You enjoyed it. I did enjoy it. I saw it.

in like Detroit I think and I remember like just thinking guy Tucker and Luke wanted to see it in theaters and I had no interest I was like it's probably gonna suck I'll go with you guys whatever

and I went in with the expectations was gonna suck and I remember being like this is really good fuck and I walked out of there and we were all like that was great the age

oh the age effects they did amazing because they did the who's the Ian no not Ian Mckellan not him Matt Mads Mickelson was in it Yeah, he's the bad guy.

Played a Nazi. He has, unfortunately for him, it's too easy for him to be typecasted as a, as a, just a bad guy. And in this case, a Nazi. He has the, I mean, he just has the bad guy look. He just has, like, the bone structure and the... Same with Christoph Waltz. Yeah, Christoph Waltz looks like a charismatic bad guy, where Mads-Michlinson just kind of looks like a, like, that's an evil man. He's always frowning.

Even when he's smiling, he's giving just, like, you know, like a lighthearted frown instead of a regular frown. He has resting mean face. He has resting villain face. Matt, he has a beautiful, he has a gorgeous smile, though. Throw up a picture of Mads-Mickleson smiling. And it can't be an edited photo, Luke. It has to be a real smile from Mr. Mickelson himself.

Mm-hmm. Yep. Hope you did it, Luke. Hope he didn't make any memes of it. I mean, who else? He can't, yeah, Mads-Mickleson. Who else? He might find some guy on Facebook with the same name

that lives in, like, Sweden, and find a picture of him smiling. And he's like, well, technically it's Mads Mikkelson. I mean, technically it is. We're talking about the actor, Luke. There might be another actor with the same name somewhere. No way. Maybe like an acting class in Norway.

I don't know. Maybe. What is he? I feel like that's more work for Luke to go find that out than... Like, he can just type in Lenny Simpsons. In this case, it would be a lot more. He's got to look about a spell Mads Mickelson, when he's going to have to go on Facebook,

which I don't even know if Luke has a Facebook. And before you do that, Luke, can you, from memory, type out how you think you spell Mads-Mickleson? Yes. Can I take a guess? And then, and then whenever you're editing this, ask Matt and I either through text or in person, and we have to do it right then and then there without looking at his name ever. Right, right, right. And trying to practice. And then we have to do it. And then you show our hours right there.

All right next to the actual spelling. Luke's going to make his spelled correctly, I bet. Because he's going to have probably looked it up beforehand. And he's like, oh, well, I just saw it. Well, you can't have the page, but like, you have to honor us, Luke. Honor us. Please. Don't bring dishonor upon us.

Please, please, Luke. Don't make us look like fools. We need you to misspell it worse than us, no matter what it is. We need you to misspell it because it's going to make us look better and we need that. We really need that. Luke, please, please, please. Please. Well, if you guys want to bring honor upon thy names, you can go to our Patreon.

get an extra serving of this podcast as well as every other episode of it every week get it early get it ad-free and get a lot of exclusive content and you can become a producer of the show names are on screen right now and you get stickers in the mail every month it's pretty dope please bring honor to us please bring honor to us please bring honor to us from Moulon the animated Disney film no I know I'm done plays the Chinese girl Pthew- End it!

End it! End it now, Luke!