supermegashow - Scammers Are Blackmailing Matt | supermegashow - 053

Episode Date: March 12, 2025

Matt's in a real pickle. Sign up for your one-dollar-per-month trial period at https://Shopify.com/super (all lowercase) Go to https://get.stash.com/SUPERMEGA to see how you can receive $25 towards your first stock purchase and to view important disclosures. Paid non-client endorsement. Not representative of all clients and not a guarantee. Investment advisory services offered by Stash Investments LLC, an SEC registered investment adviser. Investing involves risk. Offer is subject to T and C’s.  Follow Matt: @matthwatson Follow Ryan: @elirymagee Follow the show: @supermegashow To watch the podcast on YouTube: https://bit.ly/supermegashowYT Don’t forget to follow the podcast for free wherever you're listening or by using this link: https://bit.ly/supermegashowpod If you like the show, telling a friend about it would be amazing! You can text, email, Tweet, or send this link to a friend: https://bit.ly/supermegashowpod Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hi, my name is Matt Watson and I'm the secretary of SuperMegaProductions, Inc. You know, we're a business and businesses need to make a little cash and one way we do that is by selling merchandise to our beloved fans. But how do we do that, you might ask? Well, thanks for asking. Uh, we use Shopify because otherwise we'd be selling on street corners, out of boxes. We tried that, didn't work very well. But luckily there's Shopify, and it makes it real easy.

And if you wanna be just like Matt and Ryan from SuperMega, you can upgrade your business today and get the same checkout that we use at Shopify.com slash super. Isn't that nice? Shopify.com slash super. That's right, you can sign up for a one dollar a month trial period at Shopify.com slash super.

Again, Shopify.com slash super, all lowercase. Shopify.com slash super. SuperMega Show is brought to you in part by Stash. Stash isn't just an investing app, it's a registered investment advisor that combines automated investing with dependable financial strategies to help you reach your goals faster. Go to get.stash.com slash supermega to see how you can receive $25 towards your first stock purchase and to view important disclosures. Paid non-client endorsement, not representative of all clients and not a guarantee.

Investment advisory services offered by Stash Investments, LLC and SEC Registered Investment Advisor. Investing involves risk. Off offers subject to TNCs. BedMGM, authorized gaming partner of the NBA has your back all season long. From tip off to the final buzzer, you're always taking care of with the sports book born in Vegas. That's a feeling you can only get with BedMGM.

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with iGaming Ontario. agreement with iGaming Ontario. The homes of the angels fly away from here And it's time for Super Mario Show episode 50, 53 53 All I could all I could see was like images of like slow-motion dogs being like sad because well, I'm hoping you know, that is a creative edit that the visual Podcast watchers hopefully got to enjoy because that is a good idea and hopefully that was capitalized upon you remember the SPCA commercials Yes with that song. I just moved to the next channel and hopefully that was capitalized upon. You remember the SPCA commercials? Yes. With that song. I just moved to the next channel. Everyone did.

Like whenever that commercial would come on and they would have like the, it was the type of slow-mo where it's like the three frames per second slow motion. But that's such good, it's like the, it's the slow motion that Quentin Tarantino uses in all of his movies. Yeah.

Where it's so jittery. It's like if you, when you were a kid, if you filmed something with a camera and then slowed it down. It's very choppy. But is it film? You'll just have the sad dog that's like all scrawny and it'll be like zooming in and then crossfade

to like a cat with like an eye infection. They're behind like a cage, you know, like. Oh, oh. It's like, oh God, I have to help these animals. But everyone changed, my mom would cry when I was a mom. And then went to the next channel and you know, I loved my pets, but seeing pets in need?

There was another commercial like that too, but it was Children, do you remember that one? And it had a celebrity in it, I don't remember who, but it was like a female celebrity and she was with. Wasn't it usually like, they're like in African villages about providing water and like. For one dollar a day. Yes.

You can adopt like a child. A youth group convention at one point. I guess a youth group, I don't know what it would be called. Say what? A big concert thing where a bunch of youth groups came to. One of the things there was like you can donate a dollar to like Or not not a dollar your your your church could sponsor or adopt

Yes a child and I think most churches, you know did it for a month and then like forgot about the child or something My family I just remembered like my my, my mom specifically did that where... Might be behind on some payments then. Yikes. All of a sudden the money just stopped and it's like what? No, but it was the same girl. So it was a girl from an African village and I remember it was the same girl for like years. My mom kept sponsoring the same girl. And she had the same age. She'd write the same picture every update. But she would write us letters and include like a picture of herself,

like handwritten letters, where it's just like, each time it's like, I've grown this year. But if it's just like a stretched like picture of her. It's just a scam. Yeah. Honestly, dude, I bet you could scam some old people real easy with that tactic of being

like, like, prey on their, on their emotions, these, these dumb old people and be like, you want to help this, this Kenyan child in need? They'll write you a letter and send you a picture. I think scam artists have tried that, but I think it more so works that fear is the main driving force. Call an old person and go, you know, someone's trying to steal your money, quick, give me your bank account information so I can save you. Oh my gosh. We've got videos of you jacking off. Oh shit.

We're gonna send it to everyone you know. I jack off all the time. I jack off Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday. We know, we have the videos. That blackmail tactic, that's such a, that's a common scam one that a lot of people fall for. It's like we have naughty videos of you unless you send us 0.56 bitcoin to this address. I think a funny response would be like just sending back, no I have naughty pictures of you. And just sending like a random random like nude like like a penis pics someone else That's like I'm on Google images or some shit It's like what I did to that one a scammer

I was emailing with and I like accidentally sent him a penis pic and it was like a tiny ass penis with like the head Sticking out of like some jean shorts and then immediately in all caps. I was like Delete that I did not mean to send that to you a scammer could use that to blackmail me Please delete it and he did he didn't take the bait right away He used it later when you frustrated him He waited a couple weeks and then he used it emailing me with this tiny penis picture saying that he Was going to send it to everyone on my my my family my friends my co-workers So that would have been you.

You should have sent him my email, be like, whatever you do, do not send it to my boss, and then put the email link there, and it's my email, or some fake email, we just see. We should just create a story where he's talking to multiple people, and then the boss accidentally sends him a penis picture. Oh my goodness!

Do not send that to my employees! Yeah, it's like a... That would ruin me! Someone could easily extort me with that and I trust you, so please delete that. For those unaware, Matt has a hobby. I think it's a hobby at this point. It's a hobby, yeah.

Of whatever, not every time, but when the moment's right, when the sun sets and the light hits the hills just right, when that magical moment happens, Matt sees a scam artist try to scam him and it's not really so much of a uno reverse card. You like wasting their time and you like playing make-believe with them and putting them in these weird scenarios. I just come up with situations via email and we'll actually exchange like 200 emails.

I have some of these chains that are upward of 200 emails where I'm just, they go on for like two months and I'm just wasting their time. They're like, did you go to the store to get the gift cards today? And I'm like, yeah, I did, but my uncle couldn't come pick me up from Walmart, so I had to take the bus home and I had to spend the money on the bus fees So I couldn't get the gift cards, but I'll get them tomorrow And then they're like okay get them tomorrow, and I just can't my favorite one You've done is is when someone asks you to get an Apple gift card, and you send them like an Applebee's gift card

I actually bought a picture And I what were the other companies you did cuz like like it was more than just Applebee's, right? I did a Subway one. How did that correlate to Apple? I thought you did multiple where like in some way it correlated. I did the Applebee's one and then I, they said they were really pissed cause they took them forever just to get me

to get a gift card and they wanted an Apple gift card. And I said, here's the Apple gift card with the Applebee's and he was furious and he's like, I didn't say that. I said to get the Apple gift card and I was like, this is the Apple gift card. It says it right here and I circled it and then I faked a screenshot that was like from him where he was saying, get the Applebee's gift card

and I was like, you said to get it. That is not what I said. I got one of them to say I love you to me and call me baby and everything. It was like, were you like, I was like you said to get it that is not what I said I got one of them to say I Love you to me. Really? Call me baby and everything. It was like were you like I'll send you the money if you just tell me I just Need someone to tell me they love me He I don't remember how it got into it. Did you build an actual relationship with this person? Mm-hmm and He basically he he was the one that initiated it And then I think realized that that was a mistake on his part because then I got really into it

I got really like how do you initiate? What do you mean? He initiated? He initiated the he was pretending to be Like a woman seeking yeah and compassion like something like that But this was way later on in the email chain And then he regretted it because the second he brought that up I I like got into it so deep where I was like, you really have feelings like that for me? And then I got it to the point where he would end every email with like, baby please, I love you baby, I miss you.

Did you just ghost him? No, he stopped responding to me. What? You think at some point they realized they're wasting their time? I frustrated him too much. There was a point when, I don't remember how it ended, but I did something that just pissed him off too much and he told me to go fuck myself.

This was, oh, this was Madame Treasurer Janet Yellen. She told me to go fuck myself. The current one I have is Miss Mary Joseph, who has a couple months left to live, and she wants to give me 100 billion US dollars. What? And all of her properties. Well okay, why does she,

why is she being so generous and nice to you? She just like found you on Instagram at random or something? She said that she just wants to share her like, she's realized that with such little time left she wants to share. How'd she find you to share? She never said. How does she? you to share? She never said. How does she?

Oh, no, no, no, no, no. Sometimes they will say that God, I think she might have said this, that God told them, gave them a vision of me. Fuck, and then here's the thing, in a large portion of people's realities in the United States, that is a very real possibility that God could be talking to someone

and trying to send them a message. So if you're a person that is in the business of having faith and someone who puts a lot of faith in their fellow man, it could be quite a pickle you put yourself in. Careful. If you get an email saying they had a vision about you, 70% of the time it's a scam. The other 30%, it's very important that you pay attention because God is trying to talk to you. Yes. But she told me she would sign on, I had to get in touch with her lawyer so then I got another email from a different

email address that was lawyer Michael John I think and we started having a back-and-forth and My love Mary Joseph and then Michael John and they just use first names for both the first name and the last name And he sent me a picture of actually throw up the picture. Here is his judge license that he sent me and his first email And I think he looks very believable it might have been like Michael John or Michael something, I don't remember the exact name but. Michael Pena? No, it wasn't Michael Pena. However, scammers are fun to play with

except the dumb thing that I didn't realize at first is when you respond, no matter what you respond with, when you respond they basically add you to a list that is like, this person responds. So have you noticed an influx? Yes. Once I started doing the first time I did it, all of the sudden I'm getting like four

new ones a week. Is it like text, email, like how are you? Just email. Okay. Because they don't have my phone number or anything. Good, good, good. You haven't responded. You have my penis picture.

Sticking out of my jean shorts. I mean, they've used it before. I think it was, what was it? It was like a tiny flaccid penis where the little mushroom tip was sticking out of the unzipped zipper of some jean shorts with some blonde pubes coming out the side. It's a good penis picture.

I mean, you painted a wonderful picture of it. I'm sure the people that are listening are going, I wish I could see. Yeah, I know, because it's not peach fuzz. You're not gonna make me paint a picture of that man's penis are you? No I was I was using it figuratively like you painted I mean you you can you can paint a picture if you want I know that you have the talent and well that at least the eye coordination the the hand coordination lately, it's been, you've been off your game. If this were like a game where at the end of a level

you get rated, I would give it like a, you'd be missing out on that S and A ranking for sure. At least a B though. What about the detail though? Like the shading, the fine lines on the skin? Honestly, that could just, it's like you know it's a Watson original, because it's done in like a, it's almost done like you do it in like a dither fashion.

Exactly, you know, I can't help that my hands shake sometimes, some days it's worse than others, but it's probably just Parkinson's or something, just something I don't really need to worry about but I was scared that you were basically setting me up for a bit where I would have to actually paint that penis Which would take a significant amount of time out of my day and time We don't have we we we have to get cracking on other things We don't have time for I mean unless you want to take your personal time at home

When we're not at work to paint a I could penis picture. I could draw it with pencil Just to you know kind of I think that's a good compromise, but the blonde pubes were such a Defining characteristic and trait that you pointed out that I almost feel like it would be Almost a disservice to paint this picture or to, as you say, you could even have colored pencils. I just don't, I think it would be a disservice if you just didn't have some color when a color was one of the main defining characteristics you mentioned.

I have colored pencils at home. I mean, if you think it would add a lot to this podcast episode, I can paint or color pencil it and then we can show it to the people. It'll be censored unfortunately except for on Patreon where they can see it. Exactly. All right, well, you know, here it is.

Here's the little penis I drew with colored pencil. I tried very hard. I put a lot of work into it. You didn't rush, right? You didn't rush this. No, I mean look at this. I clearly didn't rush this. I'm just making sure, like you didn't,

like you're not just gonna like get a Google Images and run it through some AI pencil sketch. Nope, this is real colored penciling. Okay. In fact, here's a picture of me working on it to prove that I did in fact draw this by hand. How about a picture of you working on that hog? Okay.

Here it is. That's also something that can only be shown on Patreon. What is that? Like I'm fixing a motorcycle? Well, they'll find out. Okay. If they have a Patreon subscription. Well, Luke could show the picture of me working on it uncensored.

No, he can't. Trust me. Why? That's not something we can show on YouTube uncensored. Am I naked in it? Y'all will find out. Alright. Y'all will also find out about these great deals on this commercial break. Wait, and tell us what you think about the great deals in the- never mind, I'll save that for later. Hi, my name is Matt Watson and I'm the secretary of SuperMegaProductions Incorporated. You know, we're a business and businesses need to make a little cash and one way we

do that is by selling merchandise to our beloved fans. But how do we do that, you might ask? Well, thanks for asking. We use Shopify because otherwise we'd be selling on street corners out of boxes. We tried that, it didn't work very well. But luckily there's Shopify and it makes it real easy. Shopify genuinely makes the entire process for our business just... That's my endorsement right there.

It's three big kisses. Their website's incredible. They make setting up a website, a shop, all that stuff so easy and there's so many options. It's creative, it's fun. And if you want to be just like Matt and Ryan from SuperMega, you can upgrade your business today and get the same checkout that we use at Shopify.com slash super. Isn't that nice? Shopify.com slash super. That's right, you can sign up for a one dollar a month trial period at Shopify.com slash super. Again, Shopify.com slash super, all lowercase. I love Shopify. Genuinely makes it so easy to sell and connect with my customers.

And I'm saying my customers because they're mine. Shopify.com slash super. SuperMegaShow is brought to you in part by Stash. Are you still putting off saving and investing because you'll get to it someday? Stash turns someday into today. Stash isn't just an investing app, it's a registered investment advisor that combines automated investing

with dependable financial strategies to help you reach your goals faster. They'll provide you with personalized advice on what to invest in based on your goals. Or, if you wanna just sit back and watch your money go to work, you can opt into their award-, expert managed portfolio that picks stocks for you. Stash has helped millions of Americans reach their financial goals and starts at

just $3 per month. Don't let your savings sit around. Make them work harder for you. Go to get.stash.com slash supermega to see how you can receive $25 towards your first stock purchase and to view important disclosures. That's get.stash.com slash SuperMega. Paid non-client endorsement, not representative of all clients and not a guarantee. Investment advisory service is offered by Stash Investments LLC, an SEC registered investment advisor. lose value offers subject to TNCs. General Dunham slowly removed his sunglasses he looked Matt and Ryan dead in the eyes. So you boys ever been to space?

I told you it only takes about three hours to read from start to finish and yeah like two okay a little over three hours. Yeah, what is that, 304 on the monitor? I mean, I did take a pee break, so that probably, You pee pretty quick. Yeah. That's a good book though. Yeah.

And it is an interesting one. You were entertained the whole time. I was. I'm sorry that I took so much time. I know we're supposed to be recording a podcast. Well, it was, you know, you made a bet that, you know, you couldn't read it. And, you know, you couldn't read it in a... Or, I said you couldn't read it in under three hours, and you proved me wrong, because I'm

gonna count the pee break, so it's a little over three hours, but I will say you read the book in totality to me in three hours. Will it stand up right there? Oh, Christ. If stick... Will it stand up right there? Oh Christ. If that little portion I read interested you, you know, the very end, the cliffhanger of a book without any context, then boy howdy, would you love the full thing, which is on sale. I'll give them the full thing. People still buy that shit.

The audiobook especially. People still get the audiobook on Amazon or audible because we sell like for like We still sold like a what 40 something books Recently I thought like Luke said something like 20 to 40 over the last month. I think some 20 to 40 people bought it which is still like yeah, cuz it's so it's cool. It's cool I never think I never thought we would publish a dang book That's the sequel. I know the sequel would publish a dang book. That's the sequel I know the sequel would be so much fun. It deals with space and you could really show off all of that fun little Science fiction knowledge you have see I gave you some room there. Thank you. Thank you

So it's not how it doesn't have to be completely like nonfiction Science like all I know you do know more than me and more than most about space, but it's not necessarily true I would only say more than most because think of how many people there are on the planet. Think about how many people of those believe space is even real. A lot of people don't believe it's real because, dude, on Twitter I follow the Hubble and the James Webb Space Telescope accounts because they post pictures that they take from space. SpaceX? I don't follow SpaceX. You're interested in space I'd imagine you'd... Okay I'll follow SpaceX later but

SpaceX doesn't post cool pictures of space it just posts rocket boosters and shit which is cool. Luke just got here. Elon aside, SpaceX is a cool company I think for what they're doing. But they post pictures of space on Twitter and I go into the replies and it'll be like a picture of the moon crossing in front of the earth or like a nebula and the replies are just full of fake yeah people like this is not real like AI generated obviously you think we believe this bullshit and it's always the same it's like the middle-aged dudes that are taking the picture in their car

with the angle kind of up and you go to their account and it's all like MAGA stuff it's all it's all like love God love our country and space is not real I know a lot of people give him shit as do you, and he can be, he can push people's buttons, but like I do tend to find, and I might be a normie for saying this, that like in in terms of like when people talk about the subject matter... Neil deGrasse Tyson? Is that what you were gonna say? I was gonna say I like the way, because whenever I hear him talk, whenever he's doing a video,

maybe I haven't listened to the right stuff, he seems like he's not trying, I don't know. I like the way he talks about things. He seems very just, the thing that I like about him the most is that you can tell he's 100% passionate about science and he loves it as like a category you can tell he's 100% passionate about science and he loves it as like a category and as a subject matter in general. He has a legitimate passion.

It's almost like I would say not trying to liken them, but like when you think of politicians in the world, a lot of people, you know, less these days, but a lot of people would go right to Bernie Sanders as being like the least politician politician. Right. So it's just kind of like, you can tell Bernie, for example,

has an actual passion for what he's talking about. He's not just saying things. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Whereas I feel like Neil, for science, has a legitimate passion and it's nice to hear, and he's the first one that pops up on most things when you Look up science. I mean he was an apprentice of the great sagan He weren't Carl Sagan's pretty cool Carl Sagan was his uh his master at something like when he was younger

I know that they actually did uh like he was like a Apprentice to him or something so like Carl Sagan. I love Carl Sagan Carl Sagan is is awesome to him or something. Do you like Carl Sagan? I love Carl Sagan. Carl Sagan is awesome. Rest in peace. And also Carl Sagan wrote a fantastic book which turned into a great movie, Contact. Okay, I'm going to challenge you real quick.

Name one thing you like and one thing you dislike about Carl Sagan. Show people that you're unbiased. Okay, something I like about Carl Sagan. I like those turtlenecks he'd wear, you know? Yeah, yeah, he's fashionable, yeah. Something I don't like about Carl Sagan was, I don't like that he died. We could really use him nowadays. We could. We could use a lot of people that have died in terms of, no honestly, because a lot of the people I think of they'd probably

Not really enjoy being alive to witness Yeah, the kind of stupidity that is wreaked havoc through the nation. I I Like Carl Sagan's voice a lot and that haircut is pretty pretty slick too Carl Sagan was so cool. I'm say it's it's such a bum bummer he's not around anymore. But I do agree with you on Neil. I do think he is really passionate. People don't like him because he's kind of an ass. He's kind of just like... Is he like pompous? Yeah. It's mainly on Twitter. Twitter is where people just kind of were like, all right dude.

And to be fair, I've seen a lot of things that he said where I'm just kind of we're like alright dude and and to be fair I've seen a lot of things that he said where I'm just kind of like you know I roll my eyes at it but he is very passionate and I do like I do like his voice and he has nice podcast that I listen to star somethings star talk star talk radio yeah you're listening to star talk it should be called Star Talk Radio, if it's not, if it's just Star Talk. I think it's just Star Talk. Can we publicly petition if you agree with me that he should rename it to Star Talk Radio

because that just sounds cooler? And if he wants to come on our podcast to promote Star Talk Radio, he's more than welcome. I'd have Neil deGrasse Tyson. I couldn't imagine Neil deGrasse Tyson sitting in this room. Like if he just popped in, I'd be like fuck, because there's cardboard boxes, there's a Red Solo cup where he'd be sitting.

We'd have to clean up a bit. He'd be sitting right next to Pickle Rick. He'd probably like that. It's the Pickle Rick pillow. Yeah. Matt's grabbing the Pickle Rick pillow. See? He's coddling it. The audio listeners can't see the Pickle Rick pillow. See? He's coddling it. The audio listeners can't see this Pickle Rick pillow, but rest assured, it does exist.

They said they wouldn't do visual stuff, and they are, and uh... Well, well, well, there is visual stuff. I don't know how to cope with this, I don't know how to cope with this! See, we could do the visual stuff and not even explain it. Give me my macaroni! Give me my chickie nugs! I need something to help me cope with this! Oh, yeah.

I don't know what it is, but macaroni and chicky nugs seem to be a good start. It is. It seems to soothe the... the nostril. I just feel... I feel like there's... Let me see... No, no, no, no, don't pick your nose that... Dude! Nature's candy. Whew! Gives you heartburn, you know? No.

You're really good at physical comedy, man. I could be better if my back wasn't broken for life. Pound it. No, but even physical comedy in the sense of you're very emotive, like that. The little bit where you just pretending to eat a booger It was fantastic. Just from the loud swallow to the the fear the It's fantastic, dude. Look I I appreciate it but I I can't accept this in good conscience because I

Can only act this way because I feel so comfortable around you Most of the time, and you could probably give a thumbs up on this, if I'm in a new group or in a group that I'm not truly fully comfortable with, I'm pretty, like, people have a monotone voice, I feel like I have a monotone face if I'm just kind of talking. Yeah, you're not pulling out the whole booger routine in front of a new group of people.

However, I think you should. Well, I tried one time, and I was just embarrassed. Well, I tried one time and I was just embarrassed. You clapped and laughed and I was very thankful and you said, you owe me for this afterwards. And I do. Admittedly, I do owe you a lot for that. Okay. But those were IRS auditors that were at our office. They're very serious. They don't tend to joke around Like there's like several IRS Agents at our office and you like doing this whole nose picking routine pretending to eat it to make them laugh except It starts in the worst way it starts with you going. Oh, you should have been there Ryan was doing this funny Like picking nose thing on the pot. Yeah, show them real quick show them put me on the spot

I'm like no no you're like come on like, come on, and then they themselves, the IRS people are like, oh, come on. We know it's not gonna be as good, but we at least are gonna see. Go ahead, let's see it. And then I do it and then it's just, it's kinda quiet. And then you go, it was better on the podcast.

Hey, let me show you, come here, come here. Take them over to the computer. They stand behind us on the computer while we try to figure out which podcast it is, so we're clicking through different videos, now it's not this one, then we find it, but we have to keep going back and forth. It was like, I'm gonna go get some water,

I'm like, no, no, no, no, it's right here, it's right here. It's here, it's here. And we're going forward five seconds, back five seconds, trying to find it. Finally we find it, and it's the same reaction. Anyways, we're still gonna need to see, do you have a- there's still signs of fraud Do you have a collection of documents? Do you have like receipts?

We're gonna need like as much as you can provide would be would be well in that case Ryan do the booger routine again It actually works that this last time okay, okay, okay. Oh, I get it now. I forgot. Three's the key. The rule of threes, baby. It's the rule of threes, baby. It's what they taught us in comedy school. Fuck.

It's empty. There were a couple drops in there. There were a couple drops. You could have splashed a drop on me when you just pretended to throw that couple water on me. I saw your like... You saw a real jump. It's almost like, the only way I can describe it is, your skeleton truly wanted to jump out of your skin.

What would you do if, I'd scream. Like, my skeleton just clean rips out of my skin and leaves just the skin behind, just. And then my skeleton is over there, like hiding in the corner, shaking, and it's making little little xylophone sounds. In reality, I would probably scream when I'm out of the room, and I don't know when I would stop running.

Oh, same. Like, if I saw a skeleton rip out of your skin, I would think I'm going fucking crazy. I'd be running and I'd be processing, and I'd use exhausting myself through running as the way to mentally process what was just happening. I would run Probably realistically I would probably do East Probably do West. Mm-hmm, but I would run out and I would probably say to Luke. I'd be like Luke the dude And then I would send him back. I don't even know if I'd have the mental fortitude to warn Luke. I'd probably Playing his little video games on his computer fortitude to warn Luke I'd probably just AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUD I'm gonna call for help. Luke help! Luke! Well we'll see if he's a real friend. We'll see if he's a real friend. Yeah. We'll see if he shows up. He'll at least be somewhat... in...

I heard some rustling but he'll at least be somewhat like... concerned. Hey what's up Luke? Oh he... We were just trying to... You're a good friend. We were just wondering if you loved us. It was a test. I do, I do. He does love us. We were just making sure you would come if we were like in trouble or something.

Was there like a part of you were like, I know they're fucking with me. Was there, is there at least, but the 1% they're not and do need my help, I should probably at least lay eyes on them. It was more so, is this a walk-off bit that I'm gonna cut out of? Yeah.

They actually want me to come do some bit here. Well, we were just testing you, love. If we were in some form of hijinks or trouble where we actually needed help, I don't think we'd be screaming like that. Like, Luke! It would probably be more like, Luke! Help! Dude, come here! Please! Right now! So next time, try that one out. Okay, we'll try that next time.

But not, it can't be this podcast. It has to be another one, maybe like 10. Not for the next ad break. No, it's gonna be another episode, we'll see. It's gonna be the boy who cried wolf if we do it that often. True, because then the time we actually do need help, because.

You should always come just in case, it's serious. Come on, man, he said he's not gonna come. Did we really not again oh my god we didn't press play on it on the on the little screensaver with the rotating logo press I thought you did too I did god that's embarrassing now it's rotating is it even bright enough no it's darkened oh jeez oh that's not the right one. Fuck. Don't look at those images. My penis is picking there.

I'll tell you something. Yesterday, what did we do yesterday, Ryan? Had sex. With women, individually. No, we didn't. We went to the bra- Oh. individually. No we didn't we went to the brothel. Yesterday as well as what we did for most of the day was let's just say we were on set shooting some Hollywood

magic and when I say on set I mean on location out of our office. Two different sets technically on one location but two different sets. There are lights set up, you've got boom mics, you've got scripts laying around, you've got actors. Actors. You know I realized this sketch that we have been shooting has 13 actors besides us. For a total of 15 people. That is true because I would say this- 11 plus. Yeah, we needed-

No. Two days for filming for this one but the days filming were like a week apart. Right, I would say this this 11 plus. Yeah, we need we needed no Two days for for ting for this one, but the days filming were like a week apart so most of the cast was used in the first part of filming and then the the second part the second day of shooting was Definitely like a smaller crew. I loved this crew. It was just three people. Oh, it was fantastic. It was Tucker, Adam. And Santi. Not Santi Claus.

Not Santi Claus. Although that would have been cool. And honestly, might have been more of a pick me up on the team. Honestly, yeah, the energy he would bring would be with rosy red cheeks. But how jolly he is. It's good having a woman. Yeah on the team. You know of course and and then Matt and I and then of course the We had like three other actors that participated that

Yesterday it was it was fun. It was really fun, and I'm excited for you guys to see it. It is Still a little bit of a ways off from release. We have a specific release window in mind to line up with something. When this episode comes out, it will be closer to the release of this sketch, but not quite there yet. So keep your eyes peeled. But this one is fun. We're really, really happy with it. We've had a

lot of fun shooting it. It's all done. It's all shot. We just have to edit it now. It's a terrible budget again. And we wanted to, you know, like with the support we received from you guys on Patreon and with merch and stuff, we want to actually, you know, put that to good use for doing skits and stuff that are, where we could show, we're not just spending the cash on Lambos. Yeah, and it's like stuff we, unfortunately, we can't do sketches that have a budget like this.

It's still less of a budget than I love working out, because that was insane. But still of this, we can't do it every week. We don't have the capabilities, we don't have the funding to do that. But with the funding that we do receive, all thanks to the people that support the channel as well as the Patreons who support it directly.

Merch streams, that kind of stuff. So thank you all because without y'all we wouldn't be able to do this, and we love doing this. We do. We love putting our Bdussies into it as well. Dude, honestly, like, I can say that, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

You and I love making sketch comedy. Before I met you, before you met me, it's what we both did and had a passion for. Then we came together and combined our brains and bussies and boom, we make sketches together. Not as frequently as fucking Smosh. But we do like making them. We put a whole lot of blood, sweat, and tears into them.

A whole lot of effort to make sure that it's what we're happy with and what you guys will like. So with your support, we are super super super privileged and lucky enough to be able to actually like make higher budget like real production sketches. Not just like shotgun filmmaking out and like we're not just like renting out a cheap,

not even cheap set, we're not just filming in our houses or the camp quarter. Yeah, sorry mansions. We still do love doing that. We're still going to do lower budget running gun shoots. But it is now we have the opportunity to do higher budget things because before we had, as you said, we're gonna continue

to do the shotgun filmmaking stuff because we still love doing that. But we've never really had the opportunity and ability to use I guess We have had the opportunity ability but like now's the time where I feel like we're truly like focused and making that like an effort of like use Using the funding we're doing to actually fund the ideas that we think are really fun because I think both you and I

Were less interested in the influencer game and more interested in the entertainment game. Yeah, I wanna make stuff that is good. And I wanna make stuff that like, I wanna make sketch comedy that I guess like stands out on the platform and you know, if the president of Netflix were to see it, he'd go, God damn, these boys got

something special give him a call Mikey give him a million dollars we'll give you 50% of Netflix what we're gonna call it Netflix giggles and you're gonna own 50% of it we're gonna lead Netflix giggles their new platform that's just for giggles it's gonna be Joe Rogan and and Bill Maher and all the all the classic comedian all the most hilarious any Johnson is that a person? He's like the insufferable He's probably like the most cringe conservative comedian there is but he he's the one that did like the meme reviews of like liberal tiers.

And he also posted a thing about how he kept getting ads for gay cruises, cruises exclusively for gay men. And he was posting and complaining at Mozilla or something, like I keep getting these gay ads on your website, your platform. And everyone was like, you know those ads are targeted to your IP, right? Like based on your search history, and he deleted it. Well, it's probably what the fans are thinking, what's with all these gay ads that are about to be shown to me from the SuperMega show? Yeah, speaking of gay ads.

Yeah, exactly. Here's some gay ads. If we have any. If not, here's, I don't know, something else. Hey, it's DJ First Dibs. I notice you've been listening to a lot of summer vibes lately. I get it. You're dreaming about vacations. Ooh baby, that's my jam. With Sunwing's First Dibs on summer savings, let us curate

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Book with your local travel advisor or at sunwing.ca. And we're back baby That's like referencing all of you as one collectively as my baby Maybe it's cuz I'm very food motivated But I thought of baby back ribs when you said that did you yeah? You didn't think of like baby is in the endearing sense you thought of the baby back ribs well when I think of ribs It's a very endearing sentiment. It's an endearing food

What's that it's it becomes very carnal in nature when the ribs are actually stacked in front of me though. It's a carnal ass meal. You know, like you're, if you're going with your hands, you've got the shit all over your mouth, all over your hands, and you're just, you're tearing meat from bone with your teeth. I love the feeling. It's great. It's not like a chicken wing where you're like, although there's some people that, you know, always show off and they're like,

and it's like a clean bone. It's like, well I'm not no. I'm not doing that fruity shit I'm gonna be tearing the fucking meat off the bone with my with my canines and my molars and like a true red-blooded American mm-hmm So not like them green-blooded Americans disgusting lizard people lizard lizard green-blooded Americans. Disgusting. Lizard people. Lizard politicians, celebrities. I wonder what percentage of Americans believe in reptilians. Because that used to be like such a fringe theory and now I feel like a lot more people

openly believe that. Well, I thought disliking another race was a very fringe thing. And lo and behold, it seems to be very popular. Very common. And speaking of which, I wrote down a dream I had recently because I've been writing down topics to discuss on the podcast. And I forget.

I don't want to hear about another wet dream of yours. This one's not wet. OK. OK. Not to say I don't find some sort of solace in knowing that you're willing to come to me as a friend in those times, but go on, sorry. They stress me out.

Of course. So I wrote this down in a sleepy haze because I woke up at 4 a.m. and immediately had to write down this dream and I completely forgot about this. It's like a vision. It feels like this is exactly what would happen in a movie if someone received some sort of prophetic vision.

God sent this to me. Maybe it's honestly, it could be a vision of the future because this is totally something that could happen. Okay. I wanna know more. All right, so. You've peaked my something curious whatever that quote is from Django. I've done it. So President Trump, okay, he

basically does this new executive action where, you know, like an oil drum, that type of barrel. Yeah, he puts those all over blue cities, like Democrat cities. Like street corners and stuff, but he puts three monkeys in each, and then at random, they burst out of the barrel and attack people, and Trump calls it monkeys in a barrel, and that's like his strategy

of taking care of Democrat Cities like a new executive order. Yeah, he just he puts the monkeys in a barrel all over the place So I could see it maybe happening. Did did you were you a victim of being monkeyed? No, I didn't get monkeyed myself But I I was like hearing about it in my dream But you were you were not of witness to any monkeying around though? You didn't hear it? No, in my dream I saw it. Okay, you looked out the window,

or you walking down the street? It didn't really make sense. I was just kind of viewing it as an omnipotent third person because the structure of the dream is not logical. It's like I hear about him doing this, I kind of see him in the Oval Office, and then the next thing is I see this kind of foggy third person view of a street corner

with monkeys jumping out of the oil drum attacking and then Trump giving a speech talking about monkeys in a barrel. Oh, shit, hold on, I got an alert on my phone. Sorry. What's up? Oh, it's not like an Amber alert. It's like a new thing. It says, new executive order in place from President Donald Trump. All blue states are required

to maintain select numbers as distributed for each state of oil there or what is it barrels just barrels it just says barrels what yeah you just got an alert for that yeah it's like an amber alert type thing oh I got that too distribute the I don't think we have anything I don't I don't think it's I don't think it's good there's monkeys in them no I think it's probably just my my I think it's a coincidence just crazy coincidence I mean just a matter like California is a big state I mean if they're talking about monkeys in blue states depending on their size and you know the amount of people that are there. These were like meat, not huge like ape size, but these were pretty decently

sized monkeys. Like chimpanzees? Those are apes. They were uh they were more akin to a fictitious monkey? No no they were the ones we saw in Japan. Macaques? Yes they were like that. The Japanese Macaques? Yes. They were like that. The Japanese Macaques. Yes. The pink-faced motherfuckers that get all angry and go... That's probably why my dream selected that type of monkey, because they're aggressive.

And you have trauma from the last time you went to the... The monkey land. The monkey mountain. Monkey mountain. It's funny, I love that Japan has monkey mountain. It's fucking awesome. You can just climb up a mountain, see monkeys on the way, rarely. And then most of the time, where people are feeding them peanuts and snicker bars or whatever the fuck people are feeding them, it's up at the top.

There's a whole gaggle of monkeys. A huge gaggle of monkeys. Bab dads like big big-ass monkeys creepy uncles I'm sure creepy uncles for sure definitely getting in fights with uh with the nieces and nephews Yeah for those who haven't seen our our vlog where we go to Kyoto in Kyoto on the outskirts of Kyoto There's just a singular mountain that is just littered with monkeys and you hike up it It's very beautiful you get to the top and all the sudden there's just fucking macaques everywhere and I know a lot of you see the word macaque and you're like that's pronounced macaque you were the one that corrected me my whole life I thought it

was macaque I mean I like on reflex I pronounced it macaque but upon I was I was fooling around I created like when we were taking our break I went crazy and created a monk like a little monkey board game so I was looking up a bunch of different monkeys and so I solidified how to pronounce the macaque I genuinely I really want you to, you've already fleshed it out, and that game is fun as shit. You did end up playing it. I played it many times. With some cardboard paper. Well I got, we didn't play, I got like real actual like, you can get custom cards made. You got some made? You can get custom cards made, like deck like 52 deck of cards, you know like those types of cards, the material And I got my own cards to use

Dude, I wanna play it again, it's been a while The board game Ryan made, genuinely, is fantastic And I would love to use the funding and support of our fans to make it real It's genuinely so good. It was mainly in like a fleshed it out like crazy. I very I very much connected There's a in parks and rec there's a point where someone loses their job and in a state of mania They create this like over complicated board game out of like desperation And it all makes sense until like the end where's like, why did I just do all this? I'm going mad. That's kind of where I connect to it.

I feel like I just did it in a pure state of like, I gotta keep my mind busy, I gotta create this thing. Because we like creating. Yeah, I mean, when we were on break, that was the, I think that was the thing that absolutely sucked the most was just not being able to create. And that was what pushed us to return to Super Mega

more than anything was, more than financial stuff or whatever, it was that we just wanted to be able to create because that has always been our passion and that is what truly tickles my happy bone. Is making stuff. I will say the lone sharks do play a considerable part in it but I still agree mostly it is from the passion of wanting to create.

The lone sharks do not want to be mentioned. Well I didn't mention them by name, I just, you know. They don't want to be mentioned at all. On what they did in my pinky toe You weren't there, but they I mean I mean technically you have six toes now Because you know they kind of split it somewhat in half and so it kind of creates another test So it's kind of like a fun little fact. I have six toes on one foot Oh, I don't I don't see it that way at all

It's tremendously painful, but I want that game to be real It's a fantastic game. And now everyone's gonna go, there's the mysterious Ryan McGee board game. Yeah, they've been talking about this for a while. They're just too lazy and high to do anything with it. Yeah man, if you got off that damn marijuana, that damn pot.

I don't think it's the pot that's the problem. I think it's the crack pipe. Yeah, the crack pipe definitely does create, I don't think it creates more problems than it solves though I was prescribed by my doctor. He's the one that gave me the pipe in a little ziplock bag They used to they used to prescribe that shit. It's so crazy like that. Oh, yeah back in the day they just prescribe heroin or or Cocaine they use cocaine in hospitals every day. See when the conservatives say make America great again people always wonder what when was

America great like what are they trying to get back to? For me personally it would be a time where we could freely use heroin and coke and all of that for kicks and giggles and for some medicinal purposes here and there. Medically, it was sound. So when a reporter asks, they're trying to do a gotcha on Trump and they're like, when exactly are you referring to? He's like, when you could get prescribed heroin. Over the counter.

He'd win a lot of people over. He'd, dude, the white vote would skyrocket. They would fucking, boom! They love heroin. Dude, crackers love their heroin. Crackers love their meth. Crackers love opioids and amphetamines. Like, opioids and amphetamines,

that's a cracker's delight, that's what I call it. All these white guys and gals and they, thems, all hooked on this one this Wonderful opioid so don't chronic man. Yeah Seriously, but those crackers love their opiates dude the crackers fucking especially in like the low the lower income crackers love their opiates more than More than anything so I just don't understand why those low income crackers Don't pick themselves up by the bootstraps and like just get better and like find a job I'm addicted to Oxycontin

Exactly, I don't get a job and I don't want to I don't want my tax paying money to go to any kind of like Rehabilitation clinic. I don't want that shit around me, you know, it's scary. I get I don't want people to get healthy I want people to just to stay the way they are. Prescribe them more pills. Yeah. It's actually insane if you ever look at the statistics of where opioids are prescribed the most. There are small towns and places like rural West Virginia that get prescribed more than some major cities. And it's nuts, man.

The RFK Jr. is going to change all of that. He self-medicated with heroin You know that right? I don't know much about him other than his fun little voice Which I know people get upset but look when you have a voice like RFK jr. Does Kind of comes with the I'm gonna goof it yeah What it is yeah, that's what he sounds like he said that he was like bottom of his class in college and stuff, and then when he started doing heroin, he could finally sit still and focus, and he rose to the top of his class.

He's talked very positively about heroin. Well, he also apparently sells children's onesies that are, the message is signifying they're proud to be unvaxxed, essentially. We gotta get some of those. I know, I mean we sold the bibs and I'm thinking we could have sold even more if we went down the unvaxxed rate.

Proud to be unvaxxed. I'm proud to be susceptible to disease. Let's bring back polio. Pox, smallpox, chickenpox, all types of pox. Polio and pox baby. Last summer all the kids were saying, it's a brat summer, and I don't know what that means. That came after white boy summer. Yes, this summer, you had white boy summer,

you had brat summer, now I want it to be polio summer. Yes! Let's make it fucking polio summer, baby. Let's bring it back. The return of polio everyone's gonna have like fucking blankets on their legs see that's the thing like that looks cozy as well to wheel around you're in a wheelchair you got a blanket on yeah that's awesome like look how come like it's a comfy image and also you could

eat like if you're one of those guys like myself or Ryan who struggles with just kind of erections just out of the blue, that will cover it up. You know, and you don't have to worry about it. There's no awkward hugging your sister or your mom when you see her and you happen to also have like a random erection and they can feel it. Especially if you use a heavy blanket for those that are going home for any holiday season that that might need a

You know a regular blanket doesn't suffice in terms of covering up It'll be like a little tint almost the husband's bulge I do the first episode of curb your enthusiasm is just such a it's such a good plot Because you know like the with especially with like blue jeans sometimes when you sit down or whatever the k-pop group no no no it will it will form like a like a tint almost so there's like a bulge in your where your penis would be but it's just the way the the pants are material it's like how some some women's clothing how it looks like the point comes to where like a nipple would be yeah but that's just the seam or the way that the.

It's just how the denim is, where it just kind of sticks up. And he has to take his wife's friend to go see a movie. And she thinks that he has an erection the whole time sitting next to her. And she calls his wife and tells her. And they have a sit down confronting him about it. Such a good show.

Who was the Republican that like got in trouble for giving a hand job in a movie theater or something like that? Was that all bullshit? Do I remember that? It's confusing a Republican senator with my dad. Oh, well who am I thinking about legitimately though? Do you remember? There was some- I thought there was some person who was like got caught doing something in a movie theater like within the past year. Are you- oh within the past year? Year two. I'm thinking of uh, what's his face the the guy that got caught in the airport bathroom stall

And he had the classic what was his name, but he had the whole classic. I am not gay. I never have been gay that whole audio bite theater I never have been gay that whole audio bite theater Theater video surveillance shows us representative Lauren. Oh, yeah, bober. I was going out of Beetlejuice musical Do you get in a fucking handjob during Beetlejuice the musical? That's next level dude getting a Republican handjob during Beetlejuice the musical that is that is immaculate vibes I'm'm trying to see what went down. Why were they escorted out of Beetlejuice the Musical? Was it a dryhand job, you think? Or was it like a sloppy fucking, she's spitting

on that thing. Nohawk 2 a reference. Oh, apparently they were just... Uh, was Groove going to leave and ask if they leave continued? Apparently they were just... Uh... Making out? No, just, uh... Rude. They were just loud and argumentative with the audience during the movie. Now, see, that's what her attorneys were able to pay them off to say. It was a dry hand job.

During Beetlejuice the musical. Lauren Bobert apologizes again for maybe overtly animated behavior at theater. That's a good way to describe giving a hand job. Well the thing is the the hand job thing could be fake news. It's not fake news, trust me. Okay I have I have sources. In fact... A jaw-dropping funhouse, sorry, I saw the quote in the article and it got me interested I'll read it later There is a list of people that we have acquired from a government source That these are all people who have received dry hand jobs while seeing Beetlejuice the musical hand jobs from a Republican jobs while seeing Beetlejuice the musical, hand jobs from a Republican nonetheless and I know it's bad journalistic integrity but we are gonna release the names of everybody and if you're a video watcher you look on

screen right now you can see the list of of everyone who received a dry hand job from a Republican term Beetlejuice the musical. The list in green those are the ones who came and then the other list those are the ones who came and then the other list those are the ones who did not reach climax. Some goofy stuff. So if you want to be a part of that goofy list there's three different options to choose. You can go to our Patreon and get a dryhand job during Beatles Use the Musical. For five dollars, no no I think it's only in the in the if you want to be on these lists that's the two higher tiers but the base tier the five

dollars here that shit you get access to all the all the patreon essentially and uncle sleepover good show fun show I said it right this time you did you didn't throw in the apostrophe S. I just feel like, no, it's fine. We'll talk about it. We had like a three hour fight about this last week and I thought it was done, so let's, clearly it's not, so let's go have a fucking discussion then.

Let's go have a sit down. Kissing and making up, we only did one of those things. I don't, I think we still need to work on the other 50% if there's going to be any sort of resolution that we find in our friendship about this situation. You're right. But thank you all for supporting us. Matt, say something funny. I'm giving up on you. Right? Okay. Thank you. on you.