supermegashow - The Roast of Barbra Streisand | supermegashow - 078

Episode Date: September 3, 2025

 Barbra is spelled that way. Follow Matt: @matthwatson Follow Ryan: @elirymagee Follow the show: @supermegashow Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Someone say mudslide Luke's got a big bum bum filled with poop episode what a beautiful day it is as well it is outside it is here it's it's like a foe nice day well yeah in the studio we you know we have absolutely no idea because the we had the walls painted dark gray we had the ceiling painted dark gray I mean carpet's dark gray we're just in like a dark gray box right now we could instead paint the walls like like a field in a beautiful blue sky make the clouds like look like rabbits and pillows and stuff Ooh, I like that.

Do you think that would match with the decor we have for the visual watchers, listeners alike? Yeah. I don't think they'd really be able to see it, but it would look pretty cool to us. Like maybe on that wall across from us that the viewers don't get to see. You know, when you and I are recording, we're staring at a fucking dark gray void with some studio lights and some screens. There's a chair right there. There's actually a monitor on a milk crate as well. there's a the computer itself is also well actually it's on top of a kind of like a tupperware box for electronics that's on top of a milk crate um it's very organized to Tucker's done a fantastic

Tucker has really organized this place just just unbelievably well and believe it or not there has been progress in the in the guest setup ladies gentlemen and gentlemen and peanuts of the crowd It seems like a very general Yeah, I like that actually Yeah I thought of Jeff Dunham Because of peanut Yeah

Which is one of his best characters Incredible character I don't know if it beats jalapeno On a stick Or Occment the Dead Terror I want to get back to the podcast Yeah yeah sorry

There's no big reveal actually We're just talking about it Because we don't have The other We do we do We have everything now Well we have everything We don't have it set up

It's supposed to be right there But there's nothing there. Tucker, we got everything now. Except for a, do we have the plate right now? I ordered it on Amazon. So we don't have every. I don't know if it's here yet though. How is it months and how does it all come down to like, like we just found out we actually do have enough cameras.

We just bought one more than necessary. Like how are we always off by like the plate, like a plate, a screw. That's how it goes. That's how it is. That's how it is. That show business baby. We have everything and then Tucker's like, well, we still need a plate to attach the camera to the tripod head and we're like, okay, well, let's go ahead and order that. If this is all it took to get the guests set up going.

I don't want people to see what it looks like. I don't want people to see what it looks like off camera because on camera it looks great. Like when it's framed on camera, it looks fantastic. But then if you see it out of frame, you're like, that's it. Really, guys? That took you 77 episodes. It's like when you're on a blind date. out out come you know peek in a beautiful beautiful face you know the the the the face of your mother

or something like that just from your perspective it might be something that brings you joy or something but then all of a sudden from behind the wall comes this like has the body of a snail or something maybe an octopus so she peeks her head around the corner and you're like oh my god my date's beautiful yeah exactly she goes then she has the body of a giant a giant snail doesn't have the body of a time. It wouldn't be like, imagine that. Kind of like in Mars attacks where the woman's head gets on the chihuahua, imagine a woman's head on a snail. Except it, I guess it wouldn't be able to move ever. You know? If there's enough neck strength, yeah, you'd be able to, you know, to hold the head up.

Well, you know, that's actually why they never made a Mars attacks too is because they couldn't get the snail human prosthetic working correctly. It was too tough. Neil deGrasse Tyson came on set and also went, this doesn't make any sense whatsoever. Shut it down. Yep. Just shut it down. And they shut it down, the whole production. The more you know, cinephiles be like, like, like, uh, like, uh, like, uh, like,

Quentin Tarantino, you know. He's a big file. He's a big synophile. Honestly, like, uh, I can't synologists. I can't use file for like, like, I don't think that should be used for anything else at this point. The X files. Well, that, that's different.

I don't think that, uh, When people are like, I'm an audio file. It's like, that's why, that's why head came about. I'm an audio head. Yeah, head is much better because. I'm a Sina head. No, now it just sounds like I'm a fan of the streamer Sina. True, true.

Or maybe your, why it has joined Scientology. Yeah. Did a whole stream, like, with, like, members of Scientology, kind of promoting it to their family. Went down to the, uh, the Scientology Center, the big blue building. Yeah. And was, was doing all this. It wasn't making fun of it, really. No, it wasn't making fun of it.

Was actually, like, talking about the benefits of Scientology, which I'm not saying their benefits. I'm saying that's just what Cinnah was saying. But anyways, what would replace Cinephile? Moviehead? I'm a movie guy. I'm a movie man. I'm a movie brother.

A movie man? Movie man. Yeah. With the movie men. Dude, is there a podcast called The Movie Men? I guarantee there's not. And if there is. Can we start one?

I would love to start the movie men With Scrillix He can come on to kind of You know Because our energy People already have that We need someone

You know Someone thrown in there To kind of give a different opinion It has to be different That was just my first option Was Or not first option I thought in my head

Since y'all are so close Show the picture Yeah this is me and Skrillix Or we could get Who was Miley Cyrus's sister Dating at that one point The guy with all the tattoos

Machine Gun Kelly? No, no, no, no, no, no. The Lil Zan? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. You're a friend, show the pick. Yeah, here's me and Lil Zan. Close friend of mine as well. And, I mean, another person...

Don't show the Epstein picture. Sorry, Luke, Luke, don't even keep that in. All right, I don't want people fucking... Just... Don't put it in. And I would draw conclusions. I don't even want you having that picture. you didn't send it to him did you

you know it was a member of the press probably that that that hag witch from CNN which one a I mean a third person we could get is you know I don't know what he's up to these days close friend of yours from Breaking Bad

Aaron Paul go ahead and put the picture in I actually don't know if that picture even I don't know where it is I've seen the picture I've never kept we could look for it online because maybe Brent posted it I think Brent posted it I don't really, did I post it? If you didn't post it and Brent posted it, that's hilarious. Brent wouldn't post the one of me in an area.

Dude, I've seen the picture of you and Aaron Paul multiple times, so it's like definitely. It might be online. I just can't remember if I posted or not. Maybe I put on my story or something. I can't. I would, I would, I'll be honest. I would have to post that if I were, if I were me, which I am. And if I met Aaron Paul, which I haven't, I would have to post that picture.

I'd have to be like, everyone, look, look who I met. well he he didn't want me to post it well the he said don't post that unless you're going to get Walter White I didn't know what he meant by that at all but I took him on his word I didn't have Walter White I mean Brian Cranston or a guy that even looked similar I still I again like I can't make sense of it so I'm not going to try to I feel like after the show ended he kind of entered like a almost like a state of psychosis about um just what do I do now and his whole life started revolving around just just I'm gonna be honest was a was not the best move to to head a need for speed movie directly after such a iconic franchise I don't think that was the

correct did he yeah do you not remember that was like his like kind of like whoop I'm stepping into the movie scene I'm gonna be the lead and need for speed I didn't know he was the lead he was like the main dude no way in the trailer at least maybe they maybe they pulled a Godzilla with like with Ryan Cranston. He's in it for like two scenes, but they have to put him in the trailer a ton. He dies and then gets replaced with like, I don't know, Aziz Ansari.

Hey guys. Fellow South Carolinian. Yeah. So he says. So he says from Greenville, I believe. Hmm. Or Columbia? Mr. Ansari.

Well, that's in South America, so I doubt that. Yeah. Hey, it's Aziz Ansari. I like my impression. of Ben Shapiro? Of Aziz Onzari. Ooh, that's a good, that's a good bit.

Ben, Ben Onzari or Aziz Shapiro. Ben tried to do it live on Kill Tony. Honestly, that crowd loved it. It went crazy. Tony, Tony was a fan. Yeah, Tony wasn't a big fan. He said, I think the paint could be a little darker. Yeah.

And then everyone laughed because it was, you know, it's Tony being Tony. But thankfully everyone else had a brain and saw that it was kind of, not cool but yeah the Kill Tony guys loved it yeah it makes sense but Aziz Ansari has a new movie coming out with

Jesus sorry Keanu Reeves Keanu Reeves he looks a lot like Jesus he could play Jesus he's white yeah he has the long hair he doesn't have blue eyes though

where's that light brown beautiful hair the milk white skin it is milk white or maybe like a milk like a creamed milk like a little yellow-aged milk Ooh Little yellow-aged milk Got that beautiful skin of Jesus

Like unpasteurized You let it sit out for an afternoon And Seth Rogan as well He did the laugh in the trailer Dude do you think when the Romans Like saw the boulder moved out of the way They pulled this Oh definitely

They put their hands on top of their head Did like a did a pog face Is that what it's called? Oh yeah Definitely. Their eyes popped out of their skull. Uh, guys? I thought you were watching them.

You said you were watching them. Drake and Josh going back in time and being stationed as the Roman guards of Jesus' tomb is still a movie idea that can be accomplished, or at least a sketch idea if we were to pay them enough, we could accomplish ourselves. Drake? The hidden Drake and Josh episode. Well, probably not because Drake doesn't... Where's the Christ?

I don't know if Drake would want them. to do anything about, I don't know his stance on Drake and Josh because he went through. No, but he, yeah, I don't know about that. I did watch, I watched a podcast clip where it was the two of them getting emotional about just like, like tearing up about their experience together about how they, and I think in a good way, if I remember correctly. Yeah, apparently like Josh didn't know that what was going on with Drake, because Drake was being taken advantage of by like a Nickelodeon producer or something like that. Not finance.

Well, probably maybe financially. Probably just all around the, all over the place. And I remember he was talking about, so it's actually really fucked up because he was being taken advantage of by this producer. And then when it went to court. Who got a lot of celebrities on his side to like go to court and be like, he's cool. Because when Drake showed up to court, Drake Bell, he saw like all these other celebrities and big producers that like he would hope would be on his.

side like on the side of the other guy just like the side of good the industry yeah yeah um they protect each other in that industry they're big Nickelodeon has a has a pretty bad uh history with their producers they they actually uh i watch there's a video about dan schneider uh on the tube that goes into another Nickelodeon executive uh a producer that basically was caught arrested sent to jail and then upon his release rehired he just wasn't allowed to be on set at the same time and even did voice out the name because I you know how lawyer Nickelodeon lawyers maybe but is it Brian Peck but bleep that out of course because I don't maybe not I mean he was

arrested and went to make sure to bleep this next one out Luke SpongeBob no oh I keep telling you he's not a real person that's a character that's a cartoon character who's texting me late at night then i don't know who's texting you late at night sends me a voice memo sounds exactly like spun no it's an indian guy sorry some guy who like catfishing me like doing his sponge bob impression just some indian guy with a horrible sponge bob impression it's like what who's this then ryan i love you ryan bah yep right have you sent him any money i mean sponge bob's a fry cookie needs money every now and then we i

I've been talking about moving, moving to, I can't remember where he said he's from, but becoming his roommate, I just got to, I just got to foot the, we're thinking of getting a mortgage, like he's actually buying property, but I have to front up so much money. Like, we're going half and half on it. So I got to send him the portion first before I start the move. Yeah. Yeah, I mean, it makes sense. And down payments tend to be like 20%. And you can't get a loan for that. So. But we get loans from these ad reads. Yep. Technically, can we say that?

It's not a loan. They just pay us. After the fact, by the way. So it's not, it's the opposite of a loan. We do the ad read before they pay us. We loan them our good faith. Exactly, because technically they could just, we could do the ad and air it, and they could be like, eh.

Well, that has happened before where they'll go, ask for a reread. Maybe that happened this time. I hope that didn't happen this time. I really hate doing rereads for these fuckers. Yeah, so if we look pissed, it was a reread. And the companies to blame. They're not fuckers.

All these companies are, well, I mean, maybe they are fuckers. I don't know. Keep as much as you can, Luke. It's Trixine Katty. You're from The Bald and the Beautiful, and we have to talk to you about Audible. If you know anything about us, we are certified romanceopaths. Roe sniffing swoon lords. Soft-spoken sirens of sentiment.

Devotees of drama-drenched desire. As you can tell, we've been listening to Audubles' romance collection and have been transported to fantastical realms of delicious dalliances and breathless ballads of burning petroval. To put it quite bluntly, we are obsessed. Sometimes there are times when you need to escape, to be whisked away by tales of fantastical bonds, mutual pining, and forbidden love.

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Learn more at scotiabank.com slash banking packages. Conditions apply. Scotia Bank. You're richer than you think. Yeah, I see this. Yeah, I see it. You're doing the microphone penis, bit. It's classic. Chris Rock was the first.

The microphone penis. I'm only going in his footsteps. Yeah, I don't want to talk about Chris Rock after he disrespected my friend Will. In front of everyone. Well, Will's making a comeback. back I like pretty girls you watched his lyrical lemonade freestyle right dude it was a lyrical miracle it was it was a fucking lyrical miracle

dude honestly I will say and his lyrical lemonade freestyle as bad as it was one of the cameramen was fucking killing it because he's sitting there filming will smith and he's like doing like quick zooms like as will looks at the camera and goes like oh and he's like doing like zooms with it like and the camera man was having fun he did a good job but it's uh i didn't like hearing will smith's use swear words because no but he well he's a big serious man this time he's not your mom as will smith no but it's ain't big willie he's like your step he your evil stepmom's will smith now he just is what a evil stepmother would listen to yes that and ludicrous it would be like your mom would listen to will

smith back in the big willie uh style era where he's very clean he doesn't use the family guy bid do your homework yeah and then your mom passes away and your dad remarries this evil stepmother that you just can't vibe with and she tries to emulate your mother but she puts on the new will smith where he says the s word and stuff and it's just not the same she just likes watching uh obsidian man what's the movie that he does Gemini man obsidian man just close enough but you know the Gemini man where it's current will smith versus young will smith young i did young will smith with a fade you could have made this up and And I believe it's a real Hollywood movie.

Mary Elizabeth Winstead is in it. That's her name, right? No, it's not Weinstead. That sounds too close to Harvey. What is it then? Winstead. No. Actually, who might as well as pronounced?

Maybe she's trying to hide herself from peering eyes. You know, I had the biggest crush on her after Scott Pilgrim. Like, it was unreal. You didn't have a crush on Scott Pilgrim? No, not on Scott Pilgrim. Michael Sarah's a cutie though He is He's also in the

We saw a trailer for He's gonna be the new Edgar Wright movie Which I'm excited for I haven't seen much of Whoever this guy is I know he was in that What is it The rom-com with Sidney

Where it's like we have to pretend To be in a relationship Oh the main guy Yeah I forgot his name He seems charismatic I like him He has a cool like Cool energy

And then Josh Brolin's in it. Love Josh Brolin. Thanos. Step son of the Barbara Streisand. Oh, yeah. Okay. Okay. Oh, yeah.

Wow. Talk about evil stepmoms. I know. More like Barbara cuts hands off. I don't know. Dude. Yeah. You can't top that one.

Barbara cuts hands off. You do not want to go near her when she's got a pair of scissors. You don't want to invite me to a roast. No limits. Ever since the Comedy Central's the roast of Barbara Streisand, Ryan McGee's been blacklisted from the entire industry. Ever since he took it too far, right after I see the end of the lights cut off.

Get the fuck out! Get him out! I beat the shit out of you backstage. More like Barbara. Cut's hands off. Dude, that's honestly probably one of your best. I hadn't had an ab workout since our vocal warmups earlier. Well, it's important when you sing.

You have to breathe through your stomach. That new exercise you showed me, I had never heard of it called the trampoline, where you jump. up and down on my chest and tummy, I, that was, it hurt a little, but I guess I have more range now. Yeah. And again, when I said, when you said it was your turn to do it to me, and I said, no, we're not doing that. That, I'm, I'm, I had nothing to do with. Some days, you know, I guess it wasn't a core day for you. Yeah. It was a, it was a, a windpipe day or something, I guess. I'm just, uh, trying out some new, you know, things. I mean, you, you've heard my new, songs you've heard how good i sing yeah so i mean you don't sit yeah it's you sent me an instrumental

and then uh i was i was singing on that you didn't hear was that your voice i i just assumed that was like that was like that's not a backing voice that's your voice no yeah sounds like a it's not a woman singing no that's me oh i mean maybe i thought you were going to input i thought you were going to put in your voice later. No, no, no, I mean, maybe the mixing needs to be adjusted. I thought that was like a cute babe that you got to sing on the back. No, that was, that was all me. Okay.

I masturbated to that track. Well, that's, I mean, I guess I take that as a compliment because, I mean, if you were able to bust to it, I mean, you didn't know it was me, but still. Well, now that I do, I, I got to stop. Not that I did it more than once. Not that I did it more than once or anything, but. but I should stop yeah

back to Will Smith he genuinely though when I was watching his freestyle and he said shit and he started being all aggressive and shit did it scare you

it scared me it scared me pink I thought he was going to come out of the computer screen I thought he was going to burst through the screen and slap me like Samara or whatever her goofy ass name is from the ring honestly uh i feel like will smith is having a a real midlife crisis he's been having a midlife crisis sis like honestly i think he's been acting this way since his youtube since he's got

into youtubeing which is he's been on youtube for a bit now you remember he was in the youtube rewind marquez brownlee fortnight time fortnight and marquez brownlee ha he only did the tuttoot and the director's cut, which we got sent. Which we got to see. So, yeah. We saw the directors cut of that YouTube rewind, and we were in that YouTube rewind, and they cut it.

Yeah. You know what sucks? If we were still editing from Arcoplyer, we would have been in that YouTube rewind. Because isn't Ethan in that YouTube rewind? He is. Yeah, but he was a part of Eunice on us. You're right.

And we did the parody penis, and got sued and had to remove all of that from the internet. And they kept all the money from it. Yeah. Which, I mean, as part of this, settlement. But Will Smith, like, his whole thing was that he doesn't have to be vulgar and now he's thrown that away. I mean, Eminem famously said, Will Smith don't got a cuss on his

raps to sell records. Sorry, let me restart to do it smoother. Okay. Will Smith don't got a cuss on his raps to sell records. Well, I do. So fuck him and fuck you too. Think I give a damn about a Grammy? Half of you critics can't even stomach me, let alone stand me. But Slim, what if you win. Wouldn't that be weird? Why? So y'all can just lie to put me here so you can sit me here next to Britney Spears? Shit, Christina Aguilera better switch me chairs so I can sit next to Carson Daly and Fred Durst.

Hear him argue over who she gave head to first. Little bitch put me on blast on MTV. Yeah, he's cute, but I think he's married to Kim. Tee-hee. And that's what the rocks got cooking. I'm hoping Eminem watches this and goes, fuck.

Ugh. He's stealing my thing. Kill him. He sends a bunch of goons. I was going to say goons, yeah. Unfortunately, that means something different nowadays. Well, not as the noun. You're a gooner, but goons still. Goons is an action, but if we're using it as a noun, that hasn't been ripped apart.

There was a mistake. Eminem told his assistant to order some goons to come kill me. He told his assistant to, yeah, get some goons, but his assistant just gooned. He sent some gooners to come kill me. And, you know, they just didn't have any idea what they were doing. they were just thinking of Sidney Sweeney and that jeans commercial Also just to throw this out there

Your dad knows that joining the Facebook group The public Facebook group Gooner's Anonymous defeats the purpose of anonymous like Yeah Well it's also But I mean if you've taken a look at that group It's not actually like a support group

It's just post gooning yeah Gooney material Just thinking like your dad Accidentally like sharing Like just join the group Gouners Anonymous. Like, you know, like Facebook, I could so see them doing some shit where they send a notification out where it's like, your friend Dale joined Gooners Anonymous.

Would you like to join? Because every time I get on Facebook, all my notifications are some shit where it's like some person that was like two grades below me in high school that I've never spoken to once. It's like, they just attended this event. And I'm like, why am I getting a notification for this? I honestly, it's funny to think that when I go, next time I visit home, I could go on my dad's computer very easily and make him join some gooning groups and he would never know have him share it a little bit too he would yeah he would he would know it's me how long would

it take him to catch it would someone update him quick i i it would be up for a day at least like if dale shared something was like dale watson shared like uh gooning my brain's And it's like Like Oh poor Dale Do these microphones Look just like penises You keep saying that

They don't They look like microphones Just because something is long And You know No I don't know You could suck it and people would go That looks like

They wouldn't think you're eating a hot dog They think you're sucking on a penis Why would they think you're eating a hot dog It's a black microphone It looks like a They would say he's sucking on a microphone. I like a good, nice charred hot dog. Who doesn't, you know?

You know, when I'm at the campfire, you know, some people put their marshmallows in until they catch on fire and that's how they like them. I do that with my hot dogs. I like my hot dogs like I like my marshmallows. Covered in chocolate and graham cracker. I like my hot dogs. Like I like my men.

Covered in chocolate. Black and smoking hot. Literally smoking? Did you set them on fire? No, no, no. I'm doing cigarettes. Oh. And they're hot.

Ah. You know. Like their temperature? Like you like sick? Like like they have a fever? Yeah. Like a 45 year old like cool, older black uncle smoking a cigarette inside his house with the AC is busted. And he has strep or something as well.

Yes. I mean, that is my thing. That's your type. That is what, you know, talk about gooning. That is, you know, I could go for hours to that. Just the coughing alone, the horse. Just hearing that in the other room. God damn.

Now I'm getting too. excited we've got to change topics okay uh we can change it to a topic that i love and you love miss pacman that bow not doing much to cover any uh that business if you know yeah it's like whoa who said uh that looked good to go out in because it looks real good to go out in those heels i i wouldn't let my mother out of the house wearing those things i'll tell you what in those legs They go from here to yonder. Well, they go from about here to just about anywhere if you catch my drift. Yeah, they absolutely do.

And those calf muscles? Fuck, dude, the fucking definition, the shape. Now, if only they could take off those heels so we could see them Miss Pac-Man toes. Let me see those babies. What is she working with? I need to know what she's working with. It's all left up to the imagination. And albeit you and I have great imaginations, it's just not the same as seeing the real deal.

you know egg Zach Lee picture an egg cracking there for effect and a guy named Zach jumping out of it no no no a Chinese guy named Zach Lee he hatches from the egg

see talk about great imagination someone should draw a really cute woo-woo picture of Zach Lee hatching from an egg and if there's a guy named Zach Lee listening yeah eggs slimy but he's adorable

he's cute he's cute as a button covered in an egg slime exactly that's one of our best bits this podcast is full of them you've got the Barbara cuts hands off was that what it was

something like that exactly now there's rule of threes that means there's gonna be another great bit before the podcast it's done you don't think the poop bit was a good bit

I don't okay well I don't think it was a bad bit it's just yeah I don't think it was a you know very memorable now picture if the poop was here though

and you have to see it Yeah, that would be different. That would be a different story if the poop was here. If I'm like on a, like on a paper plate. Like if I was spinning plates of poop. All right, now we're talking. How do people spin plates? With poop on them.

No, they don't. I'm talking about the guys that do the thing where you know where they spin the plates on the little sticks. They use poop to balance the plate. No, they don't. There's nothing on the plates. They use. Do you not see this? That's how they get them to.

You're making things up again. I don't like it, and I told you to stop fibbing to me. And you're fibbing to our audience. You're spreading misinformation. You get mad at people. I'm just using the gift God gave me, dude. Gift of imagination and clowning around. You know, the God's given gift of clowning around.

Sometimes is wasted on a few, I guess. No, no, no, no. Sometimes the gift of imagination can be a curse, okay? It's a double-edged sword. Some people go, God, I wish I had imagination like Matt and Ryan. Maybe you don't. wish that yeah because sometimes we can picture things that are a little too imaginative and you don't you don't want to picture that stuff oh no i'm sorry i'm not going to picturing stuff

i'm gonna have nightmares i'm gonna have nightmares now you know my overactive imagination makes it so that i have very scary nightmares and there's nothing i can do now you said nightmares and now i'm thinking of scary stuff like the night like the nightmare before christmas stop the fucking boogie man he's made of bugs he's a sack of bugs knock it off

dude the sack of bugs is too far let's go to break I need some water I need some water Welcome back, ladies and gentlemen. We had some time to drink some water, decompress, meditate a little bit. Talk about water slides.

That helped. That did help because then we imagined we were both going on water slides. And those things look like fun. I would love to try one one day. I haven't been on one in well over a decade. I've never been on one. And that's why we're raising money to take you to a water park. Yeah, and the GoFundMe link is in the description.

So if you want to donate a hundred or a couple hundred to help out. Now, you may see that the description is for raising money for water, for that. It's just a title thing. Yeah. It, it, uh, just title error. Just, yeah, the whole thing about like raising money for water for, uh, for, uh, for, I, I, yeah, yeah. Just don't, yeah.

Yeah. um so last night you and i did something may i say insane in the membrane oh yeah it involved darkness butter no cream this time no although i did have some some cheese you did oh yeah i had a big old pretzel which by the way the the amc pretzel i was not excited i ordered a pretzel beforehand like on the app you're like oh I'll have like just a regular soft pretzel yeah I'm gonna have a soft pretzel get some cheese to dip it in whatever I get there and it's in like all the sudden it's in this piece like a pizza box yeah it's a pizza it's a pizza it's like it has my name I'm like what I open it up the pretzels like this

fucking big it was like the size of a pizza it was massive it can feed like two people three people it can feed a family family of three four you know three four a week more like but uh anyways we were at the movie theater not just for the big pretzel which i thought we were and then you informed me no matthew i didn't expect the pretz to be this big as has no there's nothing here to get excited about except for the movie and then i didn't know we were seeing a movie i thought it was just for the snacks and i got excited we saw uh naked gun the naked gun the new one with uh howie mandel and zach aliphonacus uh that was uh that was a that was a that was a trailer before the movie.

Starring Liam Neeson and Pamela Anderson and then, Luke, throw in five other names that worked on the movie. They don't have to be actors in the movie. They could be in the credits. Luke, you didn't work on that movie. So take your name out of there, Luke. Thank you, Luke. Before we dive into the discussion of the film, I do want to say, you know,

people always complain about movie theater prices and stuff. I got to say, I think they're being babies. I got an icy, a small popcorn, and some bunch of crunch, and it was only $28. Yeah. Like, come on. Who's complaining? Yeah, and if you get like a popcorn, like some pretzel bites, a hot dog, and a drink, that'll only run you like 50 bucks. Yeah.

So, uh. Cheapos. Like, listen, what, the ticket was only what, 25 probably? Something like that. Yeah, 25 plus the 28 I spent on the, the medium drink. the small popcorn in the little bit of candy It's funny that they make the boxes

tinier for movie theaters now Like there's the regular bunch of crunch box And then now there's the tiny movie theater Verses it actually smaller? I don't know They might just be the brands Making the boxes smaller But they can't just be when I was younger

The boxes used to be wider Dude were they're like this big Yeah yeah yeah 100% You know They always boxes You could get them at Walmart They would have like the In the middle of the aisle

they'd have one of those big like almost like a gigantic empty drum that would be filled with boxes of those candies and it's like two for one dollar yep and then at the movie theater with that which is crazy duds was always in there whoppers were in there it would be dots would be in there mike and ikes yep everything snowcaps everything that's in the like boxes mom candies which i love my mom loved mike and ike and i love mike and ike and i still and good and plenny's i still like good and plenties we we have We had a whole podcast dedicated to the good and plenty, taste, flavor, and the experience. And what's crazy is we had a carpet in the old podcast room and the old podcast set. And in that episode where we went out and got some good and plenny's, you know, some of them spilled in the carpet. We move out of the Super Megaplex, we roll the carpet up, bring it here, and then we unroll it in front of the green screen. And one day I look down and I see a good and plenty in the carpet. So it survived the entire trip. Just waiting for you.

It's still there. I never picked it up. You didn't eat it for good luck? No, it's not good luck. It's a relic. It's a relic. It's something that came from the past that you found in this new play. You know, it's like a sign of things are going to be all right.

Here's a mic and Ike. Archaeologists following that same logic. You did what? Find some incredibly rare relic. Yeah, I ate it. What's so? It's good luck. I mean, the bones, I'm not sure if you could call them bones.

they're so, they're, they're, they kind of just fall apart. It was like, yeah, I put it in my mouth and it just crumbled into dust. Good luck, dust, you know? Although, I will say, I, I love dinosaur rocks, which are fossils. That's a great name for them. Dinosaur rocks? Guys, I found a dinosaur rock, because as a kid, I'm like, those are the bones. We've talked about this before, but, like, we were robbed as kids, because I thought they'd, like, dug up, like, the bones.

of an old dinosaur, for the most part. But it's really just like what, like, I forget what the term for it is, but isn't it just like rock solidifying around the bone? Yeah, and it's, real quick, I got to say, it's really weird that you're talking about this because two nights ago, you were watching a video about dinosaurs?

No, I was having this exact same discussion. And I was talking to someone, and they were like, well, they're bones. And I'm like, well, I don't think they're actually bones. I think it's just like, where there was like a cast made of the bones and then that from this like rock and sediment all that shit that's weird that you're bringing this up it's blowing my mind but yeah i don't think they actually i thought they were real dinosaur bones and they're not it's just like where the

bones once were left an empty void in the in the in the earth and then it got filled up with rock or whatever somehow i don't know so if a mad scientist and this is the unfortunate part if a mad scientists were to ever create a machine that were to make bones come to life like in a Saturday morning cartoon villain type sense dinosaur bones wouldn't be a part of it and be like why is it not working on the dinosaurs yep it worked on the skeletons just rocks yeah sad it's very sad I think it's also kind of sad how that well we do kind of in some in some way live in a Saturday morning cartoon the villain in this case is sending out his henchmen to kidnap people from their cars and homes places of work hospitals libraries uh i did see that

you know they sent um outlawing home homelessness ascent you know good i saw that that is like literal villain shit yeah just go ahead and uh get rid of them i mean they're gross that's that's that that is usually the uh the argument against it right yeah like that that's what it boils down to they're lesser i don't want them i mean give them a job they're the scum of society just get them out of here and um i saw high schooler says from his like bedroom i i genuinely saw uh they they the other day they sent out like a massive uh we'll get to naked gun in a second but they sent a massive uh hoard of of ice to little Tokyo and i saw videos and they were like marching down the street like in all their military gear and i saw they uh throughout

that whole ordeal they only got one one person and it was a man selling strawberries so thank god he's off the streets i mean think about what could have been in those strawberries fentanyl probably your weapons or fentanyl or nuclear weapons wmds probably most of the fentanyl that's coming in to the united states is buried within those strawberries and they'll get to the bottom of it yeah they will so good good work boys uh but villain shit i love there's also that uh the tow truck driver no that was that i did see that but it's like it's the white house and behind the White House it's like it's night time and then like lightning flashes

and it literally looks like some Saturday morning villain shit because it like goes across the sky. It's crazy it's cool. You know all those sound effects. The classic cat sound and the organ plane. Dude if we ever make a movie and it gets put in theaters we have to have a scene

where like a cat jumps out of a cupboard and scares someone. Okay. Maybe out of a car. Classic. Just in the middle of a comedy just having jump scares thrown about? I would hate that. Although, I feel like there's a movie, I feel like scary, that's a scary movie bit maybe. Which, by the way, they're making scary movie six. With the Wayans brothers involved.

And Anna Ferris. And two of the six riders of scary movie. Is it actually two of the six, or are you just referencing how in those movie trailers would be like, two of the six riders? I'm referencing the epic movie and Meet the Spartans Disaster movie. date movie is one date movie date movie actually has dude i forgot about that people in it too was date movie the one word they have the joke with uh it's making fun of the singing movie with rebel wilson i think so yeah dude i forgot that existed the pitch perfect yes and then they're also i think a well i'm true was that even in the era of pitch because date movie was super early on because because i remember it like uh made fun of pimp my ride

it made fun of shallow howl because it was that's old as fun it had the plot of when it was like oh it's uh she's it's the actress from how i met your mother in american pie the band girl yeah yeah yeah yeah she is she's the main actress and then the main love interest is the guy from epic movie who plays one of the siblings you have the blonde one i love your encyclopedic knowledge of some of this stuff because it's it's the most random shit if i could remember their names, it'd be even more impressive. But unfortunately, they're not worth my time. Yeah. You don't, like Tom

Cruz or Will Smith. No. Or Ben Foster. Absolutely. Ben Foster's great. Yeah. Who's Ben Foster again? I'm picturing someone in my head and I want to know if it's the same person. He's in hell or high water.

He's, um, isn't he? Hold up. He's just like some buzzed What I've seen him in, he's like buzzed head. Hold on, let me show you a picture of him. Yo, I need some buzzed head. Come on, dude.

You know, I just smoked a cigarette, so I got a buzz, and I'm getting some head. You know what I'm saying? Is this guy? Oh, okay, I don't recognize him. You don't recognize Ben Foster? I don't recognize Ben Foster, believe it or not. Well, have you seen 310 to Yuma? I have.

Have you seen Lone Survivor? I have. Then you've seen Ben Foster. Yep. Have you seen hell or high water? No. You should. It's great.

Is it? It's very good. What is it? It's like one of those modern westerns where it's just like... Let me see... Now would you rather have hell or high water? Which one? High water.

Looks fun. It's kind of scary. I'm scared of drowning. You just wear some floaties. Oh, that's true. If you put your water wings on? I'll wear the chicken ones. You wear the pig ones.

Ooh, maybe the donut around. Or we could each wear one of each? I like that. I like that. they're weighted difference so we might be spinning i don't i don't like that i don't like that i just want i just want to throw that out there just in case let's not do it okay but uh yeah two of the six writers of scary movie um fantastic stuff but we liked a naked gun naked gun i'm kidding it's our discussion naked gun was uh we saw it late it's been out for a bit yeah yeah this is uh and i mean this

podcast also comes out i believe in september so it'll be like a full two months after the movie has released. Yeah. So, guys, we saw the new flick Naked Gun. Guys, we just saw the new movie Skyfall, and it was awesome. Skyfall. Isn't Adele did a song? Yeah.

Won an Oscar or something, right? Best song in a 007 movie. Adele. Oh, my God. I like, that's the Oscar. Best, best 007 song. I like instead of winning a Grammy for that. You get an Oscar.

Yeah, I got an Oscar for my song. I'd love to win an Oscar. By the way. An Oscar Meyer Wiener. Dude, I would love that. Because I'm hungry for a hot dog. Me too. I'm just hungry.

By the way, may I say, real quick before we get in a naked gun, everyone's like, Jesus Christ, just get on with it. Emmys. The Emmy Awards. I was back in Charleston. I was hanging out with my cousin and my cousin's boyfriend. And I really like him. He's a cool dude.

But he's a video editor. And, you know, I like, we like video editing. We do. We'll always be video editors, of course. We're video editors at heart. Just because, I mean, we still edit a good, decent bit for the channel. Oh, we edit a ton for the channel still. But anyway.

Always be editors. I was chilling with him. He has like two Emmys for editing. And I was like, what? You have Emmys? And he's like, yeah. Dude, did Mark not send us this? send our shit in?

Five nights at Freddy's best of. We should have got it, dude. But no, number one, number two, number three, like, come on, dude. The way that text was going, boom, boom, the thumbnail that Daniel made with all those heads. And it was terrifying.

It was good, too. It's a great thumbnail. I remember watching to make it go, oh my God, that's spooky stuff. And it is, it is spooky stuff. You know, if Mark didn't hold that grudge over the taco night shit, then we would have,

we would have had our. Emmys. Because our work for Markiplier, now, we definitely slacked on Game Grumps. I gave them the latter half of my enthusiasm. Markiplier had my full attention. 100% symbols for me. Imagine Tom, like, Aaron Blodging. What the fuck? I mean, just being honest, we have asked everything we did at Game Grumps. I mean, just, I mean, if I'm going to be honest, it was the alliteration. It's childish, and I was, I thought it was stupid. Game Grumps? Like, make it rhyme instead. That's more fun. The game dames. and they can do girls.

Games with dames. Exactly. Dames play games. See, boom. That's three better ideas than anything they came up with in that entire period. But he has Emmys because he edits like stuff for like a sports, like a like a bigger like sports team. Sorry. Yeah, yeah.

Keep that. I just want to, since we were on the topic, I want to use this spotlight. Aaron Hanson or whoever the fuck is in charge of that company anymore, the game grumps, whatever it's called. Please change the name to game guys. I promise you. It's so much better. It hits more. It doesn't have rhyme, but, you know.

Game guys is much better. Yeah. 100%. I could see the logo in my head now. You might say I'm a hypocrite for recommending something with alliteration. And you might see that it's, oh, so your problem wasn't with the alliteration. It's just that they didn't go with your idea. No, it is.

It's better alliteration, though, because game, it's G, it's G and then grow, gru. But this is game guys. Yeah. Like a, you know. Or you could, uh... Then we'd get rant guys. Ooh. You know, that'd be a cool subreddit.

Rant guys are the ranting guys. You know, uh... I'm a proud moderator of rant guys. Uh-huh. Yeah, and I put that on my resume. Also, Aaron is not in charge of Game Grumps anymore because they got bought out by... I want to say Amazon bought Game Grumps. So it would be Bezos.

Or maybe Meta bought it. So it would be Zuckerberg. I'm not sure. It's one of those. One of those. I thought they were just bought by the Kroger parent company. Was that way? Okay, it might have been that.

It might have been that. I'm not sure. But they were bought out. They've been pushing out a lot of Kroger ads recently. And they did a Ralph's one, which Ralph's is owned by the Kroger. Yeah, okay. That makes more sense. K. Roger.

Yep. They don't have that year. What? K. Dude, I've never looked at Kroger and thought K. Roger, but now every single time I look at it, I'm going to see it as K. Roger. That's a nickname for his like, I'm going to the K. Roger. You don't remember that at all? No, dude. Well, we win some. Well, now you do. We know, I didn't have Kroger's growing up. Oh, I did in Irmo.

You did? Oh, I thought it wasn't a South Carolina thing at all. We just didn't have in Charleston. There's one like five minute drive from, um, my estate. Yeah, I, I, I, we just had pigly-wigly, Bilo Publix, Harris Teeter, and Food Lion. Pigley Wiggly went. Now, on San Andrews, Pigley Wiggly was replaced with like a chef's kitchen? My mom, I should have worn it today. It's in my closet.

My mom, as a gift, got me a Pigley Wiggly T-shirt. Such classic stuff. I'll wear it. I'll wear it soon. Now the Pigley Wiggly that's on Lake Murray Boulevard is a, what is it? I think it's a bowling alley. I think it's just bowling.

That makes sense. I mean, I feel like that type of building when you when you clear when you clear that type of building out it's they already have the lanes of the aisles you know yeah exactly they probably just keep the eye the everything there that you just you roll bowling balls down the empty crows honestly dude that works because the aisles work as bumpers you know and they make cool sounds when you when you when you hit them and the floor is already kind of like you know waxed and slick that's great it's great idea um I mean you can have employees that just sit back at the end and when the pins get knocked over

They just get up out of their chair, set them back up, boom. But I'm glad that Naked Gun kept a lot of the humor from the first and second when it came to the dad, or dad humor. Like the take a chair, no thanks. I have plenty at home, that type of stuff. I loved the movie, dude. I thought it was great. Who just went, what the fuck? I like jumping right into it, you know?

Yeah, I know. Well, I mean, it's been, we've teed it up for so long that people are like, just, yeah, jump into it. Just go ahead. It was great. Liam Neeson did great. Pamela Anderson did great. The guy who played Richard Jewel did fine. He didn't play Richard Jewel in the movie, just to clarify.

No, I do think it's unfortunate because in a lot of the, I think in one, two and, I can't remember if three had it, but they usually fuck around with a lot of like famous political figures. And I didn't really see that much. They didn't really, I was expecting to see like an Obama impersonator, George Bush, even probably not Trump. Trump seems, Trump, for some reason, feels like maybe it's too current, it comes off as too hokey. Maybe if, like, someone were to do that. Like, it's very hard to make fun of Donald Trump in current media, uh, because, uh, I like what South Park does, but like other than South Park, it's very hard because whenever you do like a Trump parody, it just comes off as fucking hokey and stupid like a caricature.

Yeah, but he is a caricature. But that, I think that's why. It's like, you could do it in a fun way, though. Right. Not like the, like a beach side caricature. He's like a. Like if you took that caricature home and the caricature artist put an evil, like, witch curse on it. But it came to life.

And then it came to life. That's the best description of him. And when you walk past, it goes, boo! Jesus! It scares you spill your water, breaks, glass, you step on glass late at night. You don't know where to step because the glass is spilled. You don't have your phone to use as a flashlight. And you look back at the, you look back at the caricature and it's just sitting.

It's a regular caricature. And you're like, what the fuck just happened? Did the caricature to say boo at me? Except when you look, you see it shift just ever slightly to get back into position. But you're not sure. it's just your eye playing tricks because it's still somewhat dark and you can't really see too much and it keeps doing it and so you bring a friend over to say look watch this it's gonna do it and he doesn't do it we're not out of imagination just yet fellas nope that it's uh the well has not run dry

but the naked gun uh i thought that the humor it was it was like it reminded me a little bit of our book just because it was like a joke every half sentence well that's what that's uh how spoof movies uh at least i can say for one two three uh because Naked Gunn 33 and a third felt more like I don't know how to describe it like a sophomoreish Adam Sandler comedy whereas one and two felt like more there's a difference between a spoof movie because a spoof movie is like overtly coiny

and overtly like holy fuck like getting Liam Neeson to not him to do it but his stunt double to do like crazy back flips and spins which is a callback to like that was funny getting for the old Leslie Nielsen doing that and having a bunch of body doubles. I think in this movie too they used like an obvious dummy

in place of someone. When he throws a security guard it was obviously like a very cheap dummy. So like shit like that. That's the part that I love of one and two and any spoof movie where it's you get into the whatever their names are, the Seltzer, whatever they're called, the something Bergen Seltzer, whatever the scary movie writers who like just make spoof movies about. Oh, two of the six

of them? Yeah, who makes spoof movies just about like here's Britney Spears a bald kind of and she's crazy I know what you're talking about the Spartans they share Wikipedia page. Do they really? Yeah those two writers. Somethingberg and Smirnoff. I don't know what their

name. I don't know what their names are dude Smearnoff? I don't know something like that. Green apple smirnoff dude they they do share Wikipedia page though which I thought was funny. They've worked on movies together for such a long time. I know. I know they formed the industry. I think they just

have like straight to garbage releases now like on some streaming service wherever that would be. Garbage is a streaming service. Yeah. Honestly, a streaming service of just shitty movies? Straight to garbage. Yeah, this one's direct to garbage. We should make that. Like old movies that that's right. You could just go around, buy all the rights of these that have expired that are so cheap probably to buy up. Because they're not making any money on those movies now. Nope, you just buy them up. They're yours now. Mine, mine, mine, mine, mine. And make a streaming service of movies that no one would

watch are mostly boring and probably directors shouldn't be trusted with any other film, but it's still a streaming service where you can get exclusives that only our streaming service has. Genuinely, not a bad idea, because it would be a streaming service that, like, friends can, like, get together and they'll be like, we'll smoke up, we'll get stoned, and we'll just watch a really bad movie. It's called Peacock. It's called Stars.

There's, I got plenty. Peacock is owned by NBC. And it does have some pretty good stuff. Have you seen Project Runway There's Project Runway And then there's below deck Designers

The yachting Reality television show That follows the life Of yachties Working on a yacht boat Yep, it's yacht time And having to deal with Rich people

And their requests I'm allergic to shrimp But we served What do you have planned for dinner, chef? Shrimp cocktail oh it's like that type of stuff you know i i can picture that show exactly in my head but the like confessionals yeah but the uh that's a genius idea and i don't want anyone to steal it i like where they had sex with animals in the movie yes naked gun they did uh

they honestly they didn't play it too safe with the jokes and i liked that i see i i was almost like i was telling you right before we started recording that i kind of wish they made it rated R, because any sort of people going for the namesake are definitely old enough to go see, like, are above the age of 13 or 17. I think, though, when you rate something R, I think it, especially a comedy, I feel like, because like teenagers want to go see comedies, and I feel like when they rate it R that excludes a pretty big portion of an audience that might see it, so it reduces the ticket sales. a Deadpool then that's an R-rated comedy

your nails are dry by now when I did the paint between the ad the ad the first ad read I was told you it dries in 10 minutes yeah well if they look great I know I was just doing it for effect and flare and to solidify my position also what I really liked about this movie was it was like the perfect length it did not go on too long like an hour and a half it yeah it was like when it ended I remember

thinking like I was like oh it's the end nice like cool that was a great like it did not drag on it just it goes through the plot and then it's done it's not this like I really hate when I'm sitting there in a movie and in the third act and you're just waiting for it to wrap up and then something happens and you think it's like oh no that is not the end it's just setting up for more where it's like there's the falling action and then there's like the resolution and then after that they'll even do like a two months later birds chirping you know a camera on a crane coming down on a house you hear like you know it's usually a lot of that shit i will say is done and like i i feel like the when i picture a scene like that it's like in

a in a horror movie where it's like okay all the stuff's done and then we got to add this final scene of like this is how everyone's doing now but this scene's just here to be like have the doll's head turn at the very last second where it's like okay you didn't need to add 10 minutes to the movie to end it like that or the caricature turns his head when you make a horror movie about a caricature we should because it like comes to life and shit that that's a great idea get it hand drawn animation have it filmed so that we can actually like it's a mixture of uh hand drawn animation and stop motion because whenever it's moving on the thing we actually and when he actually comes out of the portrait we get it drawn to scale and

have it stop motioned genius but we only have a two thousand dollar budget And half of that is going to go to us because we're the stars. More than half. I'm not taking $500 for a roll. Okay. At least 75% of that will be divvied up between the two of us. And I'm not happy about it, but I'll take it. And then artists, for some reason, demand so much fucking money.

They're like, I put work into this. I need to be paid fairly. Well, that's the thing. We're going to set up an LLC, have them, like, you know, sign a contract and everything. and then when it comes time for payment day, did you read the contract? You know, maybe use digital invisible ink. Just make the text white.

Does that hold up? No, because someone highlighting it, what the hell is this? Well, yeah, but how often you go through contracts and highlight it with your cursor? Never, never match it. Exactly. It's in the contract,

and there's nothing in the law that says the ink color matters in a contract. Does it? I don't know. I mean, they have rules against like not signing in red pin

or something shit like that. Who fucking cares about that shit? I don't know. Like what? Judges like, you signed it in red pin.

You're going to jail. I don't think so. Well, speaking of, there's a list of names that have not been the, these are people,

no. No. No, no. Okay. We don't have clearance yet to release that. Okay. Still waiting,

still waiting for them to. He's, Donnie's on it a lot. so they have to make double check and make sure. Keep getting rid of it. But you'll see some of those names have emojis, and some of them do not have emojis. They're just green.

The ones who have emojis are red, black, and blue pen users, and, by the way, you didn't think of this one, a green pin. They all have them in a pocket. The other ones that don't have an emoticons next to them, they have like a mechanical pencil or two in their pockets. They, you know, and you best believe they don't have pocket protection. So if a bully came up to them and said, hey, nerd, give me your lunch money.

Punch them right there in their chest pocket. That mechanical pencil is going snap. Yeah, but we still have respect for them because they're not showing up with a number two, which is embarrassing. Exactly. Well, like, what are you, 12? I do, I've said technically the lead and a mechanical pencil tends to be number two. They have number three. I'm talking about a number two grade pencil.

Like a taekonda roga. Yes. Yeah. Which, you know, the people listening to this on YouTube or Spotify, they're the ones that have the Taekondoroga pencils. Yeah, exactly. Not sharpened either. No.

And, uh... The green ones. The green ones with like the, uh, the blue plating on top. Ugh. Remember those? And they sharpened it. Or is it silver plating? I, I just, you know, I can't remember the specifics.

But they sharpened it in one of the crank mechanical ones, but it's kind of like fucked on the inside. So the pencil comes out all rough and nasty, you know? It comes off like, uh, when you, uh, canoe a joint. Exactly. Exactly. Um, and then the ones with the emojis, they have pocket. protectors so made out of platinum so when the bully comes up they all they all stopped listening

they all left they all just got up while we were talking they're like I've had enough of that imagination shit guys come on so all right well I guess that's it Thank you.