supermegashow - Workplace Accident | supermegashow - 107

Episode Date: April 1, 2026

Matt gets careless with a dangerous tool. For simple, online access to personalized and affordable care for Hair Loss, ED, Weight Loss, and more, visit https://Hims.com/SUPERMEGA Follow Matt: @matthwatson Follow Ryan: @elirymagee Follow the show: @supermegashow Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

When hair starts to thin, confidence can too. That's why, Hymns makes it simple to feel like yourself again, with access to simple personalized care that fits your life and your hair goals. Hems offers convenient access to a range of prescription hair loss treatments with ingredients that work, including shoes, oral medications, serums, and sprays. You see every week here over at Super Mega, me, Luke, and Matt, take a company shower together, and after we're all dry, we take our hymns spray and we spray each other down and it's such a delicate fun moment for the company

and I couldn't recommend anything else but to use hymns for to feel confident and stuff for simple online access to personalized and affordable care for hair loss ed weight loss and more visit himms.com slash super mega that's hymns.com slash super mega for your free online visit Hymns.com slash super mega. Featured products include compounded drug products, which the FDA does not approve or verify for safety effectiveness or quality, prescription required, see website for full details, restrictions, and important safety information. Individual results may vary based on studies of topical and oral monoxide and finasteride. And welcome to another episode of the Super Mega podcast. I'm here with my co-host Matt. And today, as always, we're going to talk about the silliery,

and strange things around the world. So let's get started. Matt, how, um, I'm just a new... That's where the intro should go. We shouldn't go with restraint. Yeah, yeah, you're right. And then ask me when we come back. But I'm thinking, like, if we say it the same way every time...

Okay, just a... Welcome to another episode of the Super Mega Podcast. I'm Ryan McGee with my co-host, Matt Watson, and we are going to be talking about the silly and strange things around the globe. I'm sorry, when I said do it again, I meant like, or not do it again. I mean, like, that was the cold open event. You just, you don't have to do that exact same introduction. I changed world to globe.

I changed a few things. So it wasn't exactly the same. Okay. If you were paying attention. No, I mean, I was paying attention. I just, I mean, I changed world to globe. They don't even rhyme or slant rhyme. World globe.

Yeah, you're right. Like having to do it. Hold on. Let me try it out. It's like a scientist like. Hold on. I got to go back to the lab one second. Yeah, let me test this theory.

Like the white board just like, yeah. Luke, you better not be doing anything fun and creative on the comedy podcast with my green screen cup. Oh, man, so many people are like, yeah, I'm not listening to this episode. I'll find a more chill one. It's just not, it's not my vibe today. You know, we go, we range from chill, political, apolitical. Yeah, I'm a political. A political figure.

I'm stupid. Is apolitical just like, I don't deal with politics? Yeah, apolitical means not political. Yeah, right. Just like, asexual. It's not sexual. It's not. But like, it's not, someone doesn't go like they say, I'm a libertarian. They don't go, I'm apolitical.

Or do they? Or is it more of like, um, I'm more than liberalians would definitely go, oh, I'm political all right. Ooh. Because they're very, they're very proud of, of the freedoms. Libertarians are some of the most political people out there. Absolutely. Because they're equally holding the weight of two very, very powerful, interesting, witty, and fun political rivals.

The Democrats versus the Republicans. No one cares about the Green Party. No. The Green Party is, I mean, that's a... I mean, Hassan loves him, I think, right? The Green Party? Yeah. I just love Jill Stein.

I think one day he's hoping that he can be the head of the Green Party. Or maybe he can get some head from Jill Stein. He thinks green means money. Dude, you know what I just remembered? What are those assholes say on their podcast? Pulling us up on streamers. What are they? Yeah, these fucking comedy reaction Andes over here.

You know, the last time I had any contact with these fucks, that little shit Matt. Jump scared me. In the DMs. Jeff the killer, it wasn't even DMs, it was a text message. That's right. Which means that like, it might have even. It was more personal. It was more personal, maybe urge.

Right? Because a DM, he probably gets a bunch of DMs, but like a text message on his direct cell phone number from someone. He's like, oh shit. Because I was like, day, did you see this? He's probably like, hey, son, do you remember being jump scared by Matt Watson? Okay, who is that? Who? Oh, the guys that made me sit in the fucking tiny chair. Which he loved. He loved it. He sat. The bit was supposed to only last like the intro or like the first half. Yeah. I mean, but what a trooper. Well, we had that we had, he's a giant man. He's huge. And we were, we were. We were. We were. talking about like, you know, he sits in the tiny chair for maybe 10 minutes. And it's like, all right, just kidding. Here's a real chair. But just now, we didn't really feel like it. I have a question. And I was just looking at the image. And luckily, the audio list, the audio people can't.

But I was looking at the image and I'm like, do you think of one of the main reasons people don't tune in more is because I wear, I wear like camo crocs? It's like, oh, he's not taking this seriously. Not even tennis shoes. Not even some Nike's, you know, some Reeboks. Okay. I, listen, I don't want to be like the arbiter of fashion, right? Have you been playing Halo?

Okay, you caught the reference, dude. All right. I'm keeping you on your feet. The messenger of fashion. Just like those crocs are keeping on your feet. Oh, they're in sport mode. I forgot that there's two fucking modes, dude. Is it called sport mode?

Yeah, dude. We got sport mode Like in a fucking car And then we got Comfort You got leisure You got wax mode Work hard play hard, play hard

Right exactly But sport mode is literally what like Nicer cars have That you ship them into Yeah because I'm running You know around You gotta keep these suckers on my feet Sport mode

I don't think anybody Can you see that Can you see that Luke They're in sport mode No one can see it Because the camo How about that How about that?

No no no no Down Huh or to fucking nuts just plopping out dude you know what I actually when you brought up libertarians

you know what I suddenly remembered Dale's a libertarian he actually did say that a long time ago I bet he did I remember when I was when I was like in middle school and I didn't understand politics

Dale is Matt's mom by the way for any new listeners she was basically like I said I was like I was like are you Are you a Republican? What do you classify? And he's like, I mean, she's like, I'm a, I like to think of myself as a libertarian.

But you know what? It's a political party that just completely, I feel like just, remember the fucking tea party? Didn't they get thrown in a harbor or something? No, Ryan. I'm kidding. No, yeah. Not, no, the tea didn't back then. The people got thrown in the harbor.

Yeah. I mean, are they not like a. Are they still doing their thing, though? I mean, I haven't checked in on them. I feel like I used to hear about the tea party a lot when I was growing up. And I didn't know what they were. I was just like tea party? What, like a bunch of little girls prancing around and fucking, with their stuffed animals, sipping tea?

No, like revolutionary men. Sipping tea and prancing around? No, nope, sipping tea and prancing around. Like, think of the strong, like, muscles. Like, think of, like, the sweat. shedding pecks, dripping, just dripping and just of all that hard work and perspiration, chucking these huge boxes into like revolutionaries, you know? Like, that's how I pictured the, like, visually the tea party.

We were, uh, except they have suspenders on, room for their nipples to show. Okay. Okay. Or they could be wearing the barrel. What do you like about the tea party? Oh, that's, that's a tough. You're a registered tea party member. No, I'm not. Stop. I mean, Danny invited you to the...

I know. First, you assholes say, I'm part of the Oathkeepers, then I'm part of the Tea Party. Which is worse, arguably. I... Yes, the Oathkeepers, I would say is easy... I mean, I, okay, I don't know too much about the Tea Party, because that was kind of like Obama era, like, for me growing up. I didn't know too much. Sorry, who?

Obamna. Yeah, baby. Is that what you're waiting for? Oh, yeah. I know you too well. But, yeah, the oathkeepers are just straight up, like, yeah, that's not good. More like the oath breakers. Cowards.

More like the chode feelers. More like the Shade Tards. Hey. Shea. Carl and the Shay. Hey, Tards. Hell, Shea. Carl and the Shay.

We can't play the song, though, because it's probably. Well, you think who would hit us with the copyright? They're Nice Peter or Shea Carl? Nice Peter. It's a nice Peter song. It is, but he made it for like, you know. The song's on the Nice Peter Chan. Well, no, is it? Well, he let, you know, Shea Carl's a nice guy, right?

And I'm sure that he, he, he founder of Maker Studios. And one of the victim of, of, of, of crypto theft when his board ape was stolen. That's true. That's true. But I'm sure he said, you know what, Nice Peter, you did me this favor by making this song. I can't pay you, but you can post a version to your channel. I'll claim it, but you can have the views. I'll just get the revenue.

So, yeah. I mean, he could still be owning the song while it being on Nice Penises channel. What if his name was Nice Penis? It wouldn't be because YouTube wouldn't allow that. although they allow Ryan Higa to have that name that he did.

That disgusting fucking name which you know people are upset about pink guy why aren't we talking about Ryan Higa's channel yeah we can't even say the name of it

anymore damn it I will say actually growing up though like back on YouTube back on like 2008 back in the day I thought that I thought that his channel name was like

I thought that that just was the N word and I thought that was the why he named it that and I thought that's how it was pronounced and I thought that that was it actually took me a very long time before I realized it wasn't I don't know what it means does it mean something

I didn't do my research Darwin would know this it's not his name no the the first word The Eaga is. The first word's definitely not his name. Or maybe it's just what his friends. Called him?

Yeah, I don't know. Darwin would know this. I could call him real quick and ask him. He knows everything about old YouTube lore. He might be driving. Yeah. It's illegal to answer your phone while driving in Los Angeles County. They'll catch him in a crime.

They'll kill him. Yeah, dude, we're going to catch him in a crime. It's punishable by death without a trial by jury. That's one of the few crimes that is, yeah. Or even a trial by crime. by combat. Oh, fuck, dude, the judge, I'm doing trial by combat. They won't even let the gods decide.

Dude, what if, honestly, like, what if one of the punishment options and stuff going to jail was just jail or war? You can go to war. Most people would probably take war and use that as an avenue to just escape into the country that they're going to be sent off to in some way. Well, actually, I'm pretty sure Russia did that with the, born Ukraine. They literally just started getting like, they needed people and they're like, yeah, I've got all those boys in prison. Just go, y'all give them guns and just go fight.

Is this just going to be one of those never-ending skirmish? Not skirmish, is more than a skirmish. Three-day operation, Ryan. Yeah, it was supposed to be a three-day operation. But like, is it like, I feel like there's no kind of, um, right now I feel like there's, there's, there's, there's, Of course, like new stuff happening here and there, but for the most part, there hasn't been so much of a push or pull that would at least elicit, like, a reaction from fucking media or something. Like, we get little updates here and there, but there's not like a board. The biggest victory in the world. You know, there's nothing huge. Like, we don't have, like, the battle of blank d blank yet.

I wonder what, like, reading back in this and, like, history, like, if we're going to, like, what, it's, like, what, it's, It'll be the battle. Blankty Blank is a place in Ukraine, by the way, for the... Yeah, yeah, I was actually going to point that out because people might think you're making a joke. But, I mean, the war in Ukraine just, like, was really... I mean, it still is really intense. I just think we just hear about it less than the media because it's more so now it's just... It's not like...

I mean, in the beginning, it was so groundbreaking because it's like Russia's invading Ukraine, so everything is a huge developing update. And now it's been like four years. And right now I think it's a lot of just kind of... back and forth just kind of pushing Yeah, it's like a tug of war. Yeah. So the media is, they're like,

eh, not so much about, I guess I wasn't getting at more so like the media is not interesting in covering it because that's just the media. It's like they're bored and want to move on to the next thing. It's just like in general, like I feel like when you go through the history books, that like defining moment that defines like the end of a war

or like the start of the end of the war or whatever hasn't happened yet. It would have to be either just Russia just pulling out or Russia conquering Ukraine. If Russia pulls out, that's just a longie because they're just going to be right back where it all started at some point. I think probably, and I'm no geopolitical analyst. No, we're two idiots talking about things that we read mostly headlines of do a little bit of research but not research to the point of like pushing up our glasses and squinting.

I do on Grockapedia. Oh, true. But I feel like probably it's just going to probably just go on like this just for a very, very like maybe even decades where it's just like the war kind of. It's not like a conclusive end. And it's more like just kind of it ends in this kind of like it doesn't end. It's more of just kind of this ever going conflict that's a standoff of kind of like. Well, I thought skirmishes back. I thought our president ended the war.

He did. He ended a lot of wars. You know, he's the he's the no war president. And he's kept to that. Thank God. Dude. Hey, Israel says to jump. America says.

Yes, sir. How high. Oh. That's the saying. But either answer is correct and works for the example, I guess. But if, okay, if Israel jumped off a cliff, Ryan, riddle me this. If Israel jumped off a cliff? With riddles, I'm just going to be up front, but I will take it on.

If Israel jumped up... You have to start with riddle me this. Riddle me this. If Israel jumped off a cliff, would you? I wouldn't, but apparently my country would. That's already happening. Oh. God, we have some fun around here.

Oh, we have some fun in war time. Oh, you were telling me they just upped the age of, the draft even though there's not even a draft. Oh, okay. It's just the maximum enlistment age. Got it. Okay. So, you and I. So not as bad as I thought. We don't have to panic as much because we're like, fuck, we have to fucking get in shape and get ready to enlist because we're running out of time. Dude, we have like a whole fucking decade of of extra time now. So we can fucking relax a little bit, right? A war with Iran. Who would have thought? Dude, who would have thought? I got to stand up bit. Everyone was waiting for it. Watch this.

okay I'm waiting imagine I'm at the on stage on stand-up at a stand-up club I like it so this war with Iran so listen to this if they want to draft me

when I get there you know what I'm gonna be saying I'm gonna be looking back and going yeah I ran because I ran away no sorry not not when I got there There, let me restart that.

Like, if they try drafting me, they're going to learn about Iran. Because I'm going to escape and go to Canada or Mexico or Cuba or Puerto Rico. That's still America. I'll go to space. Okay. I'll just dig to China. Just throw an idea. They can't draft me if I'm in China.

It sounds like for some reason it sounds like grandmother's house we go. It sounds like someone. in a room with like Trump of just like, what are we going to do next? How are we just going to fuck things up? What are we going to do? Let's, uh, let's go to space. Why? I don't know.

Let's dig to China. Let's dig the China to get to space easier. Because the launch, if we launch ourselves through the earth and go through China, we'll be at a higher velocity so we can go to space faster. Pete's right. It's P. It's P. Fuck, dude.

Has anyone ever tried? Why has no one ever tried digging to China? Hey, you know, they always talk about, like, digging a hold of China. No one's ever, no one has had the fucking balls to actually do it, and it pisses me off. God. Go to ads. You could try. Go to ads.

Okay. When hair starts to thin, confidence can too. That's why, Hymns makes it simple to feel like yourself again, with access to simple personalized care that fits your life and your hair goals. Hems offers convenient access to a range of prescription hair loss treatments with ingredients that work, including shoes, oral medications, serums, and sprays. Doctor-trusted ingredients like finasteride and monoxide can stop further hair loss and regrow hair in as little as three to six months. You shouldn't have to go out of your way to feel like yourself. Hems brings expert care straight to you with 100% online access to personalized treatment plans that put your goals

first. No hidden fees, no surprise costs, just real personalized care on your schedule. You see every week here over at Super Mega, me, Luke, and Matt, take a company shower together, and after we're all dry, we take our hymns spray and we spray each other down, and it's such a delicate, fun moment for the company. And I couldn't recommend anything else but to use Hems, to feel confident in stuff. For simple online access to personalized and affordable care, for hair loss, ED, weight loss, and more, visit Hems.com slash super mega. That's Hems.com slash.

Super Mega for your free online visit. Hymns.com slash Super Mega. Featured products include compounded drug products, which the FDA does not approve or verify for safety effectiveness or quality, prescription required, see website for full details, restrictions, and important safety information. Individual results may vary based on studies of topical and oral monocidal and finasteride. Avengers Doom's Day is going to be the biggest Marvel movie since Endgame, and we are so hyped for it. New Rockstar's latest podcast, Road to Doomsday, is our way to share that hype with

the new Marvel fans, the old Marvel fans, and everybody in between. Every episode of Road to Doomsday digs into a movie or TV series that helped get Marvel Studios to where it is now. There's so much fascinating on screen and behind the scenes lore that led from Blade to Doomsday, and we're here to map every twist and turn on that journey for you. Join the hosts of New Rockstars as we put collective lifetimes of obsession, fandom, and industry experience to productive use on the Road to Doomsday. Road to Doomsday is available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and YouTube. Hi, I'm Eric Voss from New Rockstars, and if you want to know what's coming up next from the MCU, you should listen to The Sneak Peak, hosted by myself and Jessica Clemens.

Sneak Peak is your one-stop shop for keeping up with Kevin Feigy and his brain trust of nerd producers. It's a weekly roundup of all the most important Marvel news so that you can start getting excited. about the MCU's next big movie or series before there's even a trailer out. What should we expect? Not just from this phase or saga, but the next one too. Part of the fun of the Marvel Cinematic Universe

is being excited about the next chapter. And that excitement is exactly why we make Snake Peak. Listen for free on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts. Welcome back, you losers. A little much. A little much. What I'm something to sound fun.

Yeah, yeah. I know. We love your joke. We, hey, we, we, we have fun here. We're a comedy channel. I'm just a, just a, just a, Luke, can you play one of your ads real quick? I just want to talk to you real quick.

Luke's gaping asshole. Give it a fuck for $999. That's $9.99. Hey, guys, what you just saw was an ad that we didn't just voice and do stuff for, right? You're giving away the fucking. Yeah, I'm breaking the fourth wall. I'm turning into Deadpool.

Your favorite movie series. Unlike Rivers Cuomo, you don't have the magic in you. I got the magic in me. Like that dusty fuck. Like dusty fuck? Nothing. What are you talking about? I was just improving.

But what does that have to do with magic? I was making it my own so they couldn't sue us. You're right. You're smart thinking, Ryan. Okay. That's why we're on top. Well, that's what they called me in a, in a, in college smart thinking ryan hey no that's the guy who thinks smart no no no ryan they

you misheard they were calling you fart stinking ryan come on right you got to hand that one to me man that was not what they called me that was a zinger they were calling me smart i'd show up i'd sleep through most of the classes and usually when i'd wake up sometimes and the professor would be laughing with along with some other people but when i woke up it all got quiet they weren't make it they weren't they weren't they wasn't we were all friends so they were they um dude if i if i woke up in like a college lecture and in dude i just kind of like as i'm coming reality i just kind of everyone's quiet and the professor's clearly like oh so as you see on the board and it's like clearly just you see yourself on tic-tok later they're doing the Harlem shake over you

Well, actually From the creator of the Harlem Shake We were in We were in college 2013, 2014 That was when the Harlem That's when Joji made the Harlem shake I still love that ad that he did

That was great I mean that's the first time he's acknowledged pink guy The Creator of Pink Guy Filty Frank and shit Filthy Frank The Harlem Shake Even though that was Vernon From Game Grombs by the way guys

Vernon from Game Grumps And no, that's not Dan's alias he uses when he goes to West Hollywood. It's his alias when he goes to Simi Valley. Which very different vibe from West Hollywood, but kind of on the same wavelength. You guys know what I mean if you know what I mean. And now you're saying I go to gay clubs? Yeah. It's funny because like Simby Valley is like just so...

That's where all the great gay clubs are. You're outed it. And now everyone's going to go and ruin it. From my perspective, I mean, it's a beautiful place, but it seems like a very upper middle class boring. It seems very boring. You know, like, there's some good restaurants around there. But other than that, like, it's fucking boring as well.

It's like north of, like, Sherman Oaks, Van Nuys area. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's like, you're like further up in the San Fernando Valley. Towards, like, if you're going to Six Flags, kind of. Towards like Thousand Oaks or Valencia. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Almost lived in. Valencia when I first moved out here. Really?

Yep. Daniel and I drove all the way out to Valencia because it was so cheap. Right. That's, that's out here. You know, it's expensive. We're like, yeah, it might be worth it. An hour drive to... And then, you know, luckily, Marcus gave us a... People know his real name. He gave us a slight raise in pay seeing at the lengths we were going to have to find a place out there. And he was like, you know, maybe I'll help you guys out a little bit.

And at first, he was expecting us to pay him in, let's just say kisses, I guess. Hershey's kisses for legal stuff. Yeah. Because his lawyers are cutthroat. Marcus's lawyers. Have we, have we, I feel like I have never once in my head, like, thought of or connected. Markiplier's name being Marcus. Marcus.

Marcus Fishbuck. Mark is... You know what? Or Mark S. Fishbach. Mark is Fishbach. Hey, Mark. We know you're watching. You're always watching.

I'm always watching. I'm like Santa Claus. And they go again doing my voice. That's pretty... Matt's gotten better, I will say. It's getting pretty good. It's giving Marcus Fishbock. Maybe they could voice me in my new Markiplier cartoon I'm putting on YouTube.

Hmm. It would save me a lot of time to create. Wait, I'm going to make my own dune. Markiplier's dune. Marcus's dune. Marcus's dune. What if you do one of those rebrands where, you know what? Sometimes artists will rebrand and just go by just like their first name or something like to look like more.

He rebranded from Markiplier to Marcus Pliar. No, no, just Marcus. Okay, Mark. I just go by Marcus. Marcus. Now that he's like a director. Drop the Epleier. It's a dry, drop the Eplea, just Marcus.

He does that exact. I'd say he did, he had, uh, you know, speaking of Justin Timberlake. He, white? That made, that made me laugh very hard.

I will say. I'm just playing. I feel like he'd like super. Yeah. Oh, yeah. That was, his DUI, his DUI arrest video came out from the police body cam.

And it's very like, he was driving while in tight. He's intoxicated, putting others' lives in danger. But he knows how to goof along with the officers. He knows how to make the officers laugh in extension, me laugh. It's a clip where he's sitting in the police station after being arrested and he's looking at the paperwork. And he looks up with the officer and he goes, what? Well, I'll do them one better.

And not that that wasn't a great reenactment or description. But Luke, I'm sorry. Luke, you can play the clip. I can't wait till I get you on the floor good looking Oh Hey Luke that was just a that was just A snippet of suit and tie without the music

Can you actually play the clip Luke that's dogs humping Play the actual clip White? I'm just kidding I'm just kidding man And that's it That's the clip

Very fun I like the silent one for audio listeners. Just like five, like, just three seconds of nothing. But play the clip. Dude, I've been listening to Suit and Tie so much. I know you have. Like, it's, it's, you know, every now and then, like, it's your theme song of this era, of this quarter. Well, I mean, the quarter ends in a few days.

It's like the finale ballad of this quarter. Like, yeah, the season finale song. Like, remember, okay, here we go, guys. Except it goes, sorry, except it goes, Now that I got my suit and tie. And then it cuts to black and it echoes a little. It does the, right. A lot of the plate reverb, it's like,

and then when the credits start rolling, it's like, do, do, do, do, do, do. And it's like a remix of it. Well, now you've got me thinking about, you talked about, we've both talked with each other. I don't know about it on podcasts, but we've joked about the trailer versions of songs. Or they'll take a song like,

and make it really dramatic. like Starman by David Bowie for the Lightyear trailer where it's like, there's a Starman, waiting, with like the timpani. Suit and tie for that. Yeah, I know what I'm doing. Waiting in the stars, you like to come and meet us. Watch a ton da-da-da-da-da. Yeah.

It's fun. People must have fun at editing those trailers. I would love to do a video where it's just like, or even like a stream where it's like chat has to pick the songs, like suggest the song that we have to turn into a trailer's song version. But we have to do it a cappella or else we won't be able to monetize the stream. Fuck. And do what entertainers do best. As long as I got my suit and tie. There's been reports.

Mass casualty event. leading to the spread of a virus May God have mercy On your souls And that's it That's the truth That's perfect I think we killed it

Yeah I can't Ooh a little off key I'm sorry Kind of surprised myself though I didn't know I didn't think I could Hit that I have a note

Justin Timberlake in the booth be like Oh hold on guys play that back Whoa Wait y'all ya ya Y'all hear this hold on Oh, I did it again, I did it again. It actually sounds more like what Michael would be doing. Except he'd be like doing it in like a, oh, y'all hear that?

Like he's like having a duet with someone, but he's able to hit a note higher. It's like, that's crazy. You've been singing a lot longer than I have. With Paul McCartney. By the way, I own all your songs. Yeah, just sing that. Michael Jackson was a little rascal for many reasons, but mainly for the, he bought. he's fishing the whole fucking paul mccartney is that what he called it what he's like i'm fishing

whereas like he'd be going down he'd be like choose he'd like pick someone and be like damn damn can't remember it was from like either that documentary or something i don't think it's from the documentary because i i i would have i would have remembered michael fishing well apparently not no i'm a michael head i'm a i'm a i'm a mike yet i like mike and i'm not talking about the early i'm not talking about the movie like mike That's a great movie, though. The kid from Little vampires, Stuart Little. There's some good fish right there.

I've never seen that. You never seen that. Dude, he was horny. There's some good fish right there. Imagine you know that on fucking camera. You know the camera's on you. You're in the back of your limo and you see some gruby. Are some good fish out there?

Oh yeah, dude You saw him sitting up in his seat Tide's coming in I smell that sea air I can't believe you haven't seen that clip dude You looked at me like I was fucking crazy And not that Michael Jackson isn't crazy Wasn't crazy

Well Still is he just moved to There's a new MJ in town And he goes by JT I can't Wait, I get you on the floor Go looking Dude, but I listen to it on the drive

To Super Mega every day And the drive home from Super Mega So I get home and my I listen to it on to Drive 2 Super Mega every day And to drive away from Super Mega Every day I put my fucking car in sports mode

And I put on I put on suit in time From the album 2020 Which it's just a tipper lake Featuring Jason Z I picture you in your car I do I am I'm driving home at night

For instance like last night Like you're swaying your car to the like rhythm of this. Now that I got my suit and tie. You stay. You have your sunroof up. You're standing on it driving with one of your feet. Like one of those scenes like in Vegas out the top of the limo. But fucking like this.

I love that fucking. I just had I have like something like a like a two by four piece of wood that I'm using a reach. the fucking gas with or you're like a bird you're like your your fucking toes curl over the steering wheel you know

like that you got you got some pretty unique feet they could probably wrap around a steering wheel if you bind them around them around them I could

actually I don't have very good control of these little piggyes because of my bunions but I've been driving home and I've been last few nights I've driven home pretty late because of a little something

something we've been working on and that will not be out by the time this is out. Maybe. Maybe. Maybe. Yeah, it should be.

We'll see. I'm not going to say anything just in case. It's like late at night and I'm driving and, you know, just like no one else out on the road. So, yeah, man, I'm fucking. As long as I go on. Donuts. Oh, yeah. Red lights.

Don't bother me. I said, I said, what? A red light. I hardly know her, officer. step out of the vehicle Step out of the vehicle Step out of the vehicle I hardly know her

I asked if you've been drinking You're showing clear signs of intoxication Intoxication I barely know her At this time I'm gonna have to place you under arrest For suspicion of driving while under the influence Dude imagine how epic And base coded that would be

If I was pulled over and I did that and it became a meme Epic YouTuber who was putting other people's lives in danger by drinking while, driving while intoxicated, owns cop. There's, there are... Hey, what's that? Made you look. I didn't look over at anything. I'm looking right at you.

Yeah. But you thought about it. Exactly. I love always, like, having to win it, but you thought about it. I like saying made you look before he even looks. Before you not have to have the chance to look. Just like, hey, look over there, made you look. I could do the classic.

It's like, hey, officer, do you know how fast you were going? Made you speak. what? I said, hey officer and you responded and I said made you look

said made you speak come on come on good night sir gets back in his car and he's like he's like this is too much what?

He made me speak how did he do that does he have mind control powers if we want to go viral I have an idea we get in mind control powers and force people to memorize

ad reads. Well played. Masterful gambit, Mr. McGee. Our corporate over... I'm sorry, that's wonderful. Here's a second one. It doesn't really make up for it, but thank you. I know, I know.

When trust is broken, it's... It takes a lot longer to earn back. It takes more than just two correct fist bumps to... Yeah. I was saying our corporate overlords, thank you for the way you snuck those ad reads in. But now... I almost don't want to give you that praise after what you just did.

After what I just did, I hardly know her. Well, I do that to a judge. Your honor, I just met her. I like doing it not with things that even work with it, though. Like things that are only with her. Yeah. Like, it's just like, in contempt of court, I hardly know her. We're going to.

I need the attorneys to come, come. Because already being held in contempt means I did something. Probably by just more of those jokes. Yeah, I just keep doing it. I'm representing myself so I can always sneak them in there. So I set myself up, go in the witness names like, murder. I hardly know her.

And then when they bring up like the like you're basically, it's like you've, you've, you're accused of murdering this woman. Who? They say your name. I hardly know her. That just doesn't play well. I thought the jury would really like that one. You're like, sit back down afterwards next year later.

You're like, I really thought the jury would like that. There's one member on the jury that just loves it. Just the whole time. You can just use, oh. Yeah, he has to do this. I'm sorry, juror number eight. Are you all right? I just had a sneeze.

All right. If you're not feeling well, let us know. I just, I got made fun of it in grade school. I have a funny sounding sneeze. okay I just matter that that lap was the jury

going dude they better never put my ass on no jury I'll tell you if I was on if I was on jury duty and there was someone

wisecracking like that I'd have to I'd probably be having a good time you know how hard it would be like reality television if I you know how hard it would be to be on a jury

and it's over something so fucking stupid that like you because dude there's there's got to be like definitely times in cases where like someone with like, I don't know, maybe like no self-esteem or anything, sue someone for, you know, making a joke about, you know, their image.

Like if you were to Photoshop like a like a genitals onto like a someone's V-tube, V-V-tuber character or something, make a joke out of them. Right, right. That's a good hypothetical basically. That would be funny. And I don't know how being on the jury, you'd be able to, like, because a jury, you have to compose yourself. You have to, like, there'd be things that would make you laugh.

And you're, you know, you're not supposed to do this. You'd just be like, it's like the afro-man trial that just happened. It's like, if you were on the jury for that, how did you not just like, because there's like some woman crying to a video of just like. The song playing? Yeah, for 13 minutes or some of them are like 20 minutes long. The song? It's like a whole video.

So it's like the song, and I might go on for that long, but I think it's the song and then there's also like an explanation that he's giving in the video of like what's going on and why he's doing what he's doing. We should we should make some like inflammatory song about someone so they sue us over it. But make the song like four and a half hours. So in court, so in court that it's like, God damn it. That would make us lose instantly. They have so much Like hate built up From having to just sit there

Watch a four hour Just the jury has to listen to like eight times Like in deliberation No we have to make it all the way through Or else we're not giving it Our due diligence Uh Jury needs to reconvene

Actually we need to listen to the song one more time I've never had jury duty And I've always actually wanted it Because I feel like It would It seems exciting, but I feel like

I wouldn't get an interesting thing. I feel like the majority of it, it's like you're going to be sitting on a jury for some stupid thing where someone's suing someone else over something stupid, nothing exciting over like a money dispute or something. And you're just like, you're not going to get anything fun like,

I don't know. O.J. Simpson murdering his wife and her lover. Ex-wife, Ryan. Ex-wife. They were all, they were, they were, like, And her lover was Ron Goldman, by the way.

Ron Sackman. Ron Swanson, by the way. That's awful. That's so shitty. That he killed him? Yeah. No, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm bad.

I'm bad. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. No, no. It's what happened to him is very tragic. And the way the media just kind of didn't even care about him is also tragic. God, that's my real opinion. Ron Swanson joke?

Done. That was me putting a period so we can move away from this gracefully. To put the murder of a man and then finito. Why did you do that? No, I'm not.

You're disgusting. You're vile. You're disgusting. You're a peatred man. You're mocking me now. You're mocking me. I might go turn the air conditioning off and maybe drain the main vein. A, I am a damn ice cube over here. And I ain't talking about the rapper. And I'm also going to pee.

I'm just kind of cold. Why are you looking at me like that? We have no ad reads to cut. What are we going to cut to? Just dead air? I mean, you can just clock wipe or something. Or you can entertain them. Clock wipe.

I just met her. Amazon basics. I just met her. Hey. How are you going for? Oh, yeah. The audio listeners, I was holding a... Matt was holding a fake gun that's usually powered by CO2, but the cap is off.

On the handle, the shield to block the view of the CO2 cartridge has been taken off. So it's just a cylindrical hole in the handle of a gun. Or a very... If you were to paint that silver, it would look like a cool future gun. Oh, shit. or like a really, like a gun that like a rapper from the 90s would have, that'd be really expensive. Yeah, you got to stud it out. Yeah.

Ice it up. I got to ice this shit up, make it sparkle. No one fucking, like, why does no one, like when they get their guns, nobody fucking makes them all like cool and like decked out. You know, call of duty and stuff. I'm sure you can look up. I'm sure there's subredits. It's all about that type of shit. Like like real life call of duty, you know, type of shit.

Oh, look, I put my call of duty clan's emblem, Michael. I put the red tiger camo. Remember how hard that was to get back into modern warfare days? Oh, look it out. It's real life now. But I feel like most people just get a gun and it's just like why, why not have some fun with it, you know? Guns are already fun. Sure.

So make it more fun. That makes sense. Yeah. It's my logic. I mean, it's already one of the top leading causes of deaths in America. I'd be a little. Why not at least make it fun? I'd be a little less mad though if I died via gun.

A lot of them just do to irresponsible. responsible gun owners too. Because they can't see the gun when they're shooting it because like a lot of people shoot it in the dark. You can't see it. So it painted something glow in the dark or cheetah or like leopard print or some like Spice Girls skin wrap. That'd be cool. Who's your favorite spice girl? Erica 100%.

Or Jessica too. It would either be Erica or then Jessica Spice by the way. They end their names in Spice. I know. I think it's implied, though, right? I don't have to say their last name always. Is it like an honorifics thing? There's Annalise Spice?

Yeah. Annalisa. Analisa? Annalinda? I don't know. Matilda Spice? Fucking like a girl group with like some like some hot chicks and you know, they all have like the stereotypical like Tiffany. Jessica.

I mean, there's just one that's. like Edna or like Ruth like from the Incredibles Edna mode no capes no capes no capes that was good I caught the reference you bet you didn't think that I'd get it you'd think that you could fly that one past me Edna mode okay I wouldn't fly it past you because I wouldn't have a cape See? You can see what I did there? Pretty good, right? Oh, we forgot to press play on the herb.

Yeah, here we go. Yeah, get comfortable. I need to stretch my legs out more, man. It's like this, when I'm sitting here on the podcast, it's like I need to, I get all pint up with. Look how goofy this white boy is. Are you saying that lovingly? Half and half.

Yeah, it felt like there was a little bit of stank on that. That was, that was, that was, kind of, I could feel the condescension in your voice. I think you're just jealous that you can't go fucking all spaghetti-leg like this. You can't go white boy mode. Yeah, Ryan, I'd like to see you try to go white boy mode. You'd hear a snap and then a loud scream. And then the camera

would zoom out and then it would be the world. And then it would zoom out even more and it would be the Milky Way. We, dude, we need to... Then I would zoom out even more and it would be God. looking at a snow globe on a table going oh yeah exactly yeah we need to write down all of these early 2000s movie tropes because we're always we're always like you're all you have like an encyclopedia of them and and we need to make sure that these are documented so we can reference them quickly or we make a movie that's made for like it's the early 2000s I mean that's

what people want nowadays but that's why but that's why we need to write them down so we can make sure all these good ideas make it in there Dude, you're on fire. No, like you're really on fire! Ooh! My favorite, he throws water on him, except it's just gasoline. That happened in a book that I had to read for school in like fifth or sixth grade and it really stirred me. It was a book about the dust bowl.

What I say, like, the dust bowl? I remember that book. It was boring as hell. Did you read that too? It was like a diary. It was like required reading for like elementary school. Right. And it's like her diary, some girl's diary.

She lives in the Dust Bowl. And her mom, I think she's pregnant or something. I don't remember. Her mom catches on fire. And she throws the daughter's like, I'll put you out, mom. And she throws a bucket of what she thinks is water. It turns out to be kerosene. Also, who's just keeping a fucking bucket of kerosene sitting around?

I just think we should judge. You know, people, people do, you know, do different things than. you and I don't think it's your place to judge. Where do you even get kerosene? You can know a few people who have like a larger supply and they can divvy it out to you. They probably have a supplier themselves. Would you get getting kerosene from a supplier? Like it's a drug dealer?

You got the kerosene? You know where, uh, because you hook a brother out? You know where I could get some, uh, a little k? Going, going to a dealer and asking for some k, I mean, when they give you some ketamine, be like, what is this? Is this like a powdered form? Yeah, it's ketamine. It's K.

Ketamine? I hardly know her. Good night, everybody. Ben, it's just silent. You're still in the room with the drug dealer and he's like, no, I was just, that was a joke, obviously. I still want the, uh, kerosene, the, some kerosene. I don't have kerosene. And what are you talking about?

Are you, what am I talking about? I, pay, I hardly know her. That's 60 bucks, by the way. Yeah. but I'm not getting anything as you like you go but I'm not but I'm not I'm not getting any drugs

what drugs I mean you you run out the door as fat I love fucking I'm not I'm not getting any drugs and I'm not getting any less just not a guy so in a way he hears like his friends say it

doesn't understand the context of he just goes oh the night yeah the night before he's at a party with his friend he's like yeah guys I'm not drinking anymore cracks the beer but I'm not drinking any less he goes whoa oh my god that was so funny I'm not I'm gonna kill you if you don't take that out of your pocket right now and I'm taking that as a real threat and I'm suing you no no I'm no I was tired of it was in character as the truck dealer you're holding a gun it's done it's done