Syd & Olivia Talk Sh*t - A Major Love Island Bombshell! 💣

Episode Date: July 22, 2025

The next chapter of our Fantasy Love Island Bracket is here! This is not one you want to miss! Remember these episodes now go up a few days early AND with bonus content on Patreon! https://www.patreon.com/c/syd_and_olivia Listen to the show on the go! Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/2j0iQxY9Pf0h4mXEOFxgmk?si=a95ba3e2a2844ec4 Chapters 01:15 | Intro 02:12 | The Curious Case of the Mystery Keys 06:39 | Love Island Fantasy Bracket 11:49 | Anatomy of a Toomgis 22:40 | The Heart Rate Challenge 36:36 | Next Time On Love Island 39:11 | Syds Ungodly Creations 43:16 | Best friends Dictionary This is a 7equis Network Show Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Hi! Wait, really quickly, we just have to tell you about one thing really quick. We have a one quick thing really quick. Um, if you've ever wanted to heckle a movie with us, now is your chance. Now is your chance, guys. We are doing a movie night on our Patreon, July 25th at 5 p.m. Pacific. Pacific. And, uh, we're going to watch a movie that you choose.

Yeah, you guys get to vote on what movie it is. We get to, you can pitch movies. You can pitch every movie you hate. Last time, when we tried to do it and kind of failed, we did Velasapaster. Which is an insane movie about exactly what it sounds like. Yep. And we're going to watch something of that caliber, something nutty, something stupid. If you have an idea, let us know.

We're going to heckle it. We're going to spend just a couple hours together heckling something and hanging with you guys on the Patreon. So come on over and do that. Also on the Patreon, you can get episodes early, uncut, extended, uncensored. Q&A's little tidbits of random things we decide to do here and there. Really fun stuff. You can find out Olivia's diagnosis. Really fun stuff.

really fun stuff, you guys. You've got a lot of stuff over there. Definitely go check it out. And we'll see you at movie night. Yeah, come heckle a movie with us. Hi, you're Sid and Olivia Talk shit. I'm the Sid one. I'm the Olivia one. And today, this is the big bad podcast for you. God, that takes a really long time. How are you guys? How is everyone? How are you, Sudney? Um, I'm good. Um, I'm good. Um, yeah, I, um, I had like a weird mystery happened yesterday. Oh, I love a mystery. Oh, also just really quickly, we are going to do a Love Island update today. Oh yeah. This is our first episode in a hot sack without a guest. And don't you worry, we'll be doing a love island update. We'll be doing a bunch of fun, silly little girl thing.

Yeah. So just like a, there will be a love island update. It is happening. Don't even worry, Kyle from the Patreon. It is happening. Oh yeah. And if you want to join the Patreon, we have a Patreon. We have a Patreon. You get episodes early, uncut, and extended and little extra bits of things. Um, uh, I, my Zeta passed away. like a year ago. Yes. Great start. Yeah.

So yesterday we did like a memorial where we unveiled his plaque at the cemetery. So my family and I went to the cemetery and he's in like a mausoleum condo kind of thing. Okay. His body is stacked on other bodies. Heard. Kind of like Yurtle the Turtle stacked on a big pile of turtles. Right. That makes sense.

Right. And it was just cheaper. And he's in there. And so we got him a plaque. like got him flowers and whatever. It was a cute thing. And then afterwards, we went to lunch. And so my family and I are at lunch and I opened my bag. We're about to leave. And I go in to pull out my keys and I pull out the scariest keys I've ever seen that are not mine. It's like this huge thing of keys with like these gigantic like leather key chains and like a big fucking like pepper spray thing.

And it was like really scary keys. And I was like, are these anybody's? And everyone was like, No. What? I was like, what the fuck are these keys? Yeah, how did they get in your bag? And then I asked the waitress. I was like, are these yours? She was like, no. I was like, can you ask everyone at the restaurant if these are their keys? What restaurant? It was like a soup and salad place in Culver City. Okay. And so she was like walking around asking like the other waiters and stuff like, are these, are these? Are these anybody's keys? Everyone was like, no. That's hard. Because what if someone says yes and it's not their keys? Yeah. And I was like, oh my God, what are these? So I was like, okay, I don't know. And my mom kept being like, you probably just picked them up and put them in your bag. And I was like, no, because these are the scariest things I've ever seen. And I would know these are not my keys. Yeah. Also, like, yeah, I can't see a world where you just picked up someone else's keys that clearly aren't.

Yeah, okay. So then I like leave them at the restaurant. I go like, okay, I guess like if somebody comes back for their keys, like here you go. And I leave. And then I got a call that night from my mom. And she goes, I know what the keys are? And I was like, what are they? And she goes, they're the keys to the cemetery.

Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Because. Wait, how did you get the keys to the cemetery? So you know how my Zeta was in the condo. Yeah, the condo mausoleum? So he's way up there. And we were trying to put flowers in the thing, and we couldn't do it.

So we had to have a guy who's like the groundskeeper of the cemetery walk by with those little long arm pinchy things. Yeah, yeah. And put the flowers, like, try to angle them into the thing. and I guess he dropped, he like put his keys down to the cemetery. And my mom, for some reason, put them in my purse and did it. That is so insane that she put them in your purse and then went, you put them in your purse. Yes. She was like, you probably put these keys in your purse. No, you did.

And then later on was like, oh, I stole the cemetery keys and I put them in your purse. And now they're at a soup and salad restaurant in Culver City. And that happened yesterday. Wait, that means we can officially do a scavenger hunt where we send people to, and we're not going to say the name of the restaurant because then it's more fun. We send people to different soup and salad places in Culver City. And then you win the keys to a cemetery. And then you get to just do whatever you want in the cemetery. Yeah, my mom called them and was like, hey, the keys to the cemetery are at this soup and salad restaurant in Culver City.

And she was like, they're going to go pick them up. Don't worry. And I was like, what? Wait, she called the cemetery? Yeah, because she was like, I took your keys. That sounds like, yeah. So anyway, my mom stole keys to the cemetery. And then blamed you for it.

And then blamed me for it. And that's my story pretty much. I want to do that. I want to steal keys to specifically cemeteries. Put them in people's bags and then tell them that they did it. Yeah, it's pretty sick. That's awesome. Yeah.

Any updates for you? Oh, God. The bumper ripped off of my car. I put it back on. It's exciting. I went to three Fourth of July parties. Oh, wow. I don't like Fourth of July.

Seems like you do. Yeah, I don't know. I dressed like I dressed in all black, if that's anything, if that does anything for you. Yeah, gosh, I don't know. I'm just been moving a bunch of boxes and just doing a bunch of like, I don't know, nothing interesting. Fair. Yeah. Okay.

It's time for the Sybilivia. Love Island fantasy bracket. Music. Music. A game out for love. Oh, wow. Okay. Yeah, an interesting one.

Previously on Love Island. Now, it's been a while, so let's remind you who's in the villa, okay? Yeah, we came back from Casa Amor. Everyone coupled up with who they are with now. Our current couples are California Pizza Kitchen and the 405 freeway. Kibokie Tinky Winky and the burning pile of furniture outside. my apartment. A lot of water and the rainbow fish. Wow, they're finally together. That's crazy. The giving tree and a horse are somehow there. And this leaves Tumgis, the A&PM monsters, single and

vulnerable. But wait a second. Just when we think Tumgis is single and vulnerable. Yeah, and it's towards the end of Love Island. That's really scary. And there isn't a shot in hell that he'll find anyone. God. We hear sexy legs walking. Clipping, clopping into the villa. Sexy, sexy, sexy. We hear, whips, twing, twing, twing, twing, twing, twing, or something like that. We hear like, and everyone in the villa is like,

is somebody tumbling into the villa? What is that? And we see from the shadows, the wheel of fortune. The newest bombshell in Love Island, pitched by Jordan from the Patreon. The Wheel of Fortune enters the villa. The Wheel of Fortune enters the villa. The Wheel of Fortune does its intro video. Yeah, yeah.

It goes like, hi, my name is the Wheel of Fortune. I'm the Wheel of Fortune. I'm here to bring lots of fortune to the villa. If you couple up with me, you might just get some fortune. Boys in the past have said I'm very lucky, but I'm also a little bit of trouble. If you land on bankrupt, not me fault. I've bankrupted a couple of. boys in me life. So if you're not going to pay for me, then on to the next. If you want a fun

time, you better pay for me vowels. A. E. I owe you. And that's the sound I make when I come. Yep, yep, yep. That is, and that's beautiful. I love that. Yeah. And then everyone in the villa is like, whoa. Whoa. The Wheel of Fortune is so colorful, so round. The first wheel in the villa. That's so true. Huge news. That's huge. Huge. And you know, you can't reinvent the wheel, but you can bring it into the villa. And they always say that. I've always said that. So the wheel comes over and it like rolls into the horse. Yeah. The horse is like, yeah. And then. I forgot you can't do the horse sound. I'll do the horse sound every time the horse talks. Thanks for reminding me. Jesus. Christ. Just trying to live a normal life over here. Just trying to pretend I can

do the horse sound. I can pretend I can do horse sound. I'm pretty good. So the wheel, the wheel is going, going. It runs over the horse. The horse is like, yeah, the horse is like injured to an extent, which is really dangerous for horses. The wheel keeps going, keeps going,

runs into a lot of water. Now it's all wet. It's just wet. And it goes straight up to Tomb Guess. Whoa. The wheel is like, Hi, I'm really interested in you. I got my,

Eyes on you, actually. Exactly my type. Because with all the money I have, I couldn't put together a bunch of snacks as good as this. You know how she says that? Yeah, she does say that. She's like, I literally have all the luck in the world and you have all the chips in your food back. Yes. And that's a good match.

And that is a good match. Yeah. Tombgis is like, oh, oi. Wait, I, oh, oh, I could really do some, Hoy, Hoi-Hi-Minoi. I could really use some fortune. I feel like I've been kind of unlucky in this villa because I've been in love with the rainbow fish this whole time

and the rainbow fish left me for a lot of water. And then in Kassamo, when I took to the horse, it was simply just a horse. And I thought maybe it'd pick me because I'm a pile of snacks into a human body. But it didn't? But it didn't. It didn't even tree because it has apples.

Yeah. So, I've been really unfortunate. I've been really unlucky. And I feel like, I'm just a good guy. I'm here for the lads. Here for the lads. I'm a good guy. I'm a good hang. I'm a good hang. I'm a good hang. I'm a good guy. Good guy. And the wheel of fortune goes like, oh, I, E, I, oh, you, that's so sexy. Yeah. And the wheel. And then we're like, whoa, the wheel just came on national television. That never happened.

Our first come in the villa. Our first come in the villa. So then, so everyone is like, wow, this wheel is so sexy. Also, the wheel is huge. Oh, it's massive, which is also another reason why. I went up to Tombgis because... Tombgis is a big guy. Tombgis is very tall. The only person in the villa that tall besides Tombgis has got to be the giving tree

and cocky-winky-winky. Yeah. Tombgis is like, wow, I love a tall bird. Yeah. I love a tall bird. Love a tall bird. What are you like? 5-11?

And the Wheel Fortune is like... Seven feet tall? Like seven feet tall. Yeah. Something like that. Chumgis has no spatial awareness at all. No, he's crazy. It's crazy.

Well, he has no depth perception because his eyes are what? Gumballs? Something like that. Yeah. Um, yeah, he has no perception of, of also what, what creatures need water to live. Yeah, he has no idea. Yeah, but he's a sweet, he's a sweetheart. So, um, yeah, look at this guy. What are his eyes? His eyes are real eyes. Oh, his eyelids are cookies and his eyes are real eyes. Yeah, that's upsetting. Okay. All right. So his eyes are human eyes. And I guess, well, wait, his eyelids are croissants. His, oh, yeah. Well, his, yeah. Well, do they say, sell croissants at AMPM?

They do. They do. Bad ones. Yeah, bad ones. Probably. We should do, you know how we did the trip to Greece? Yeah, we should do a trip to AMPM. Yeah, I would do it. We should sell a trip to AMPM. Yeah. I would do it $5 each trip to AMPN. Everyone, if you want to come with us to AMPM to visit Tumgis in the flesh, comment below.

Comment below. And say what part of his fupa you're most excited to eat? Yeah, I mean, I'm, I mean, his fupa is, oh my God. Doritos. So his food food is obviously potato chips and Doritos. We always knew it was loose chips. We knew it was loose chips, but it's a variety. I didn't realize there was an M&M underbelly.

Yeah, there is an Eminem underbelly. And also what I like is that his bags of chips are off. They're like not branded. Yeah, they just say potato chips classic. And the candies just says candies, which is no candy. Which is also so crazy because it's like you'd think they'd have the rights to say some of these things because they sell them at their store. Right, right, right. Right?

Or maybe that's not how anything works. I guess that's not how anything works. Is that a little bit of stuffing coming out of him on that end? What do you mean? The green chip bag above the deal? Do you mean like Thanksgiving stuffing? No, like plush. Oh.

Wait a second. What is happening? Oh my God. Okay, guys, if you're not watching this, we just discovered something awful. Yeah, this is really disturbing. On Tombgis's side right above the Doritos. Yeah. And maybe we'll post a picture on Instagram so that you can see.

He has like a bit of stuffing. It looks like pillow stuffing. Yeah, like it's coming out from a puppet or something. Yeah, like he's a stuffed animal. Tumkis is not a stuffed animal nor a puppet. No, he's snacks through and through. He snacks through and that's why we love him. If you peeled off his skin, you'd see a layer of snacks, not stuffing.

Yeah, right? No, his blood isn't stuffing. His blood is Kool-Aid. Right. What are we doing here? Yeah, and his tears are Diet Coke. And his tears are Diet Coke. Okay.

Well, anyway. Sorry, we got off on a tangent. I'm like, horny now. Freaking out. I'm like, my whole body. Oh, I'm feeling so sexual. That's good. That was my sexual sound.

That's my sexual noise. That's actually the noise I make when I come. Yeah, you make a bunch of pots and pans falling down the stairs. It's because I throw a bunch of pots and pans down the stair in every time. Whenever you come, you eject pots and pans from all your holes. Yes. And you're always at the top of the staircase. And that's what everyone writes on the exit.

And that's what I love about you. Okay. So the next thing that happens is we see CPK and 405. Oh, and they're a pretty good match, I feel. They've been a good match. They're both Californians. Yep. You know.

And they're sitting in soul ties. Okay. Because that's a part of the villa we haven't mentioned yet. Soul tie. Yeah. Soul ties. Soul ties is a part of the villa. I don't know.

Are you guys actually watching Love Island? I am. And, okay, so they have this conversation. Yeah. CPK's like, oh, you know. Yeah, exactly. The 405, and the editors sped this up on the 405. part so that it wasn't so slow. Right, because the 405 talks so slow, but the episode ended up

being a day and a half long. So they had to speed it. So the 405 takes CPK aside and says, before we go any further, I need to tell you something. All of the girls know, Jeremiah knows. And then obviously, you know, CPK is like, oh, that's awesome. Who's Jeremiah? And 405 says, but I'm a mommy. Mom? I'm a mommy. Mamasita. No.

No. I'm a mom. A mom of what? A dog? I have a four-year-old daughter. Oh, how old is he or she? So we learned that the 405 has a human daughter. Don't ask us to explain how?

It happened four years ago. Four years ago. The 405 got pregnant with presumably a human male five years ago. What freeway did OJ take? Oh my God! Oh my God! Whoa, you found out here first. OJ. Simpson and the 405 had a daughter. Holy shit. Holy shit. Oh my God. Whoa, that's huge.

I know OJ Simpson was escaping on the 405 years before. However, it took. still took it. He still took it. He still took it. And the 405 was pregnant for years. Yeah, that's true. Because I don't know human pregnancy. You don't know how pregnancy works for freeways. And the 405... It looks like construction. Yes, it just looks like construction. It looks like construction. And then a baby comes out of the construction closet. It's way out. And it's, it's... And it's gorgeous. It's a beautiful baby. It's like, should go into modeling. Oh, no, this baby is like catalogs and stuff. I literally am following this girl's. No, she's too young. I'm going to follow this girl's only fans one day. I can't that she's too young.

Okay, this fictional character is gorgeous. Yeah, she's so beautiful. She's like one of those babies where you're like, whoa, those genetics. Yeah, those genetics are crazy. I mean, when you think about it, OJ Simpson, you know, despite being, you know, not a great guy. Right. Handsome man. Yeah, and the 405, despite being really annoying, fucking hot.

Hot. Sexy. Sexy, sexy, sexy 405. Sexy, a wuga, awuga, awuga, the 405. So for years and years and years, there was construction on the 405. reason why is she was giving birth to a human daughter. Who was so sexy that the daughter needed to stay in there longer. Stay in there longer so that people could handle it when she eventually came out.

Yeah, she was just getting prettier and prettier and pretty. The good news is she has a full security team and they will be with her until she is 18. Yeah, yeah. She needs that because she is beautiful. Beautiful. What? I don't know. I don't know.

I didn't make this up. This is reality. No, it's just one of those things where like, you know, when you see like just like, a baby and you're like, that baby could be in commercials. Yes. It's like she's like a Gerber baby. Yeah, exactly. That's what I think. Except because we saw what happened with Millie Bobby Brown. Oh, yeah. We're like the security. We need to be really careful. We know what world we're in. People are bad. We got it. No, we're not endorsing this.

We're not saying people should be bad. We're saying we need to protect her. We're saying people are bad from the world. And also like, she's got famous parents. She's got famous parents. So people would absolutely want. And she has controversial parents. She does. She has two controversial parents. Really controversial. Equally controversial. You know, the freeway and O.J. Simpson. Yeah. But I guess the question is, like, how would CPK even, like, would he be okay with on the outside being a stepdad to O.J. Simpson's child?

Well, you know what he says to her? What? He goes, oh, that's chill ass. I have a kid's menu. Oh, my God. He does have a kid's menu. And in fact, a really good one. Really good.

Like a really good one. Oh, no. Sometimes I'll, like, door dash the kids Fusili Alfredo and just a cup of tortilla soup. And let me tell you, that is a nice little meal. I love that. It's delicious. Yeah. We're looking up the CBK kids menu now. Yeah, it's actually, it's actually fucking awesome. Oh, CP Kids. Oh, CP Kids! CP Kids! It is one of the better kids menus for sure. Yeah, it's actually really good. Build your own kids pizza. Are you fucking kidding me? That's awesome. Sometimes I'll get the kids grilled chicken breast for my dog. Yes. She likes it. It's actually pretty sick. Anyway, wow. Okay. So this is crazy news. So CPC has

pretty well. I think he, I mean, besides the fact that he really didn't get it at first. No, it took him a while. Once she said, I have a four-year-old daughter, he asked how old is he or she, which feels like not listening. No, it feels like a backwards conversation. He's from California. He's California sober. He's literally fine. Yeah, he's just a little bit high. Yeah. Okay. So then. Then. So then. So then. So then. We hear a big pool of sludge entering the villa. Well, we hear the sludge enter the villa. We don't see it yet. Is that nice on your ears? Yeah, it's like rolling through the villa, picking up furniture and stuff with its sludge.

Like, you know, kind of like when you clean a car with one of those kind of rubber silly putty things and you're supposed to, I don't know. I've never done it. But I've seen a rubber silly put. Yeah, they're like these silly putty things you like kind of put on in to clean. From like an infomercial? Oh, yeah, I think so. Okay. So the silly putty thing. So the infomercial continues. Okay.

And they say, has this ever been you? And the sludge wipes out half the villa. Okay, sludge wipes out the villa. It keeps going through, it keeps going through. It goes up to the lot of water. A lot of water is now completely polluted. Oh my God, that's disgusting. It keeps going.

It goes through the burning pile of furniture, which gets put out and it goes, oh. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But then immediately lights up again because she's too fiery. She's so fired. It keeps going through, going through. And then from the sludge, you see a human body. Has this ever happened to you? Has this ever happened to you?

And a human body forms. Whoa. And it is Mark L. Wahlberg, host of Love Island, Sid and Olivia Fantasy Bracken. And then on his shoulders forms a second human being. And it is Young Sheldon, the other host. Much like how Voldemort lives on the back of Professor Quirle's head. He lives on the back of. his shoulders facing the other way. His hips are attached to Markle Walder's shoulders.

His full body, it's just that his hips are attached to the back of Markle Walbert. So it's kind of like bent over in L shape. It like kind of sucks for him. He's having like a hard time sitting straight up. He could use a brace or something. Yeah, absolutely. And they say Islanders. It's now time for the infamous heart rate challenge. A came in for long! Oh my God, this is so important. The heart rate challenge is huge because if you don't know what the heart rate challenge is... Oh, in fact, it's not even a challenge.

It's just an excuse to do lap dances. Everyone wears a heart monitor. And then everyone else comes out and one by one, they do lap dances and try to get as sexy as possible. This is real. This is real on Love Island. And then they see at the end whose heart rate got raised the most. by which islander. And is it the person you're in a couple with or is it someone else?

Now, this is a real thing on Love Island. What I really like about this season of Love Island, U.S., is it has turned into every single challenge is just group sex. That's everything. Every challenge is like, what would happen? If we all fucked. If we all fucked, took our clothes off, rolled around on each other's bodies, and then whipped each other, and nobody wins.

There's no winning. There's no winner. It's just like insane. Is that a statement that there's no winning in group sex? I guess there shouldn't be. If someone won group sex, that would be kind of fucked up. There is no winning in group sex. Group sex should be socialist.

Yeah. Yeah. Should be equal for everyone. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. I'm glad we figure that up. So, okay, so here's what happens in the heart rate challenge.

First, obviously, kibinky winky. Oh, my God. Of course. Kachinky winky is going to start off. And obviously what do they do? Comes up and says, uh-oh. And then the subtitle is get your little hearts ready because I'm going to show straight porn on my tummy TV. And then starts showing straight porn on their tummy TV.

Everyone goes, this is like what we expected you've been doing this the whole time. But then, cuntie tinky winky rims itself. Yes. And how does it do it? It stretches. Like silly potty. Like city, Candy, has this ever happened to you? Twists around.

The straight porn is still playing. The TV is like warped. It's elongated. It's warped. Yeah, the people in the straight porn have like cone heads. And everyone's like, whoa, I've never actually seen porn like that. That's really interesting. They're all so warped.

Long and warped. Tuntie-dinky winky twists around rims itself. And everyone claps. Everyone claps. Everyone's heart rate is exploding out of their chest. What a strong start. Who is going to follow that up? Rainbow fish.

comes out. Rainbow fish comes out and gives everyone a very dry, light dance. Oh, a dry, dry, dusty left. A lot of flopping. Essentially, the rainbow dance, the rainbow dance. That's what it's called. And that's what it's called. That's what it's called. I didn't name it. I didn't name it. I didn't name it. The rainbow fish used to be a resident at the rainbow room where it would do, where it would do stripping. Which does that, that doesn't happen at the rainbow room, right? No. So that's why it got fired. Right. Because it was also way too dry. It was so. dry and the thing about a lap dance is that you want to feel

like moist, right? You want someone to be dripping you up while in there. You want someone to moisten you up. This is a twitchy twitchy dry lap dance. Yeah, he's he or she or it or whatever. Yeah, whatever the fuck it is. Rainbow Fish is is flopping on people and going dust is coming out of its little flaps. Yeah. Its gills gills are like quivering. It's kind of like

upsetting. Yeah, its eyes are like open and unblinking. You know when you see like a dead fish and it's like doing that? Everyone's kind of like okay but Tombgis is like just still what are you going to do? I still love yeah what are you going to do?

Next we have the 405 Whoa. The 405 gets up and says would you like to get in the car pool lane two people or more 405 takes CPK and horse and smushes them together. Whoa.

Yeah. And then makes them make out. Whoa. That is crazy. And then forces everyone into a crowded standstill and makes them stay like that for four hours. That is experimental burlesque. Yeah, it's like kind of theatrical. Have you ever gone to jumbos where they make you pack in like sardines and stay very still for four hours?

Oh yeah. That's literally my favorite thing. The stripper that does that is my favorite one. The stripper who does that. Shriver who makes me hearty. More people than can fit into Jumbo's clown room and then makes them all stay. And then keeps going, I have COVID. Yes.

Yes. I have COVID. I love that stripper. She's the best, right? Oh, my gosh. Anyway, next we have CPK. Ooh. CPK goes up and sprays ranch out of its junk.

Pretty straightforward. Pretty straightforward. Pretty cool. Next we have the horse. Whoa. Horse goes up and licks a bunch of sugar cubes super seductively. Okay, that's sexy. But then also accidentally steps on everyone's feet because horses don't really have spatial awareness.

Right. And this raises everyone's heart rate because now they have broken toes. A sudden traumatic injury would raise your heart rate. Absolutely. So it's like raising your heart rate but not really in the way you want. No, it's like, is that cheating? But like, it's not. It's just breaking toes.

It's just breaking your feet. It's just breaking your feet. It's just breaking your feet. Next, the fire goes up. and says, is it hot in here? Oh, is it just May? And then burns every islander. Right.

Just viciously. It's really bad. Like third degree burns. We have to stop. There's a medical team that has to come in. PA's come out. A lot of injuries this episode. Really bad.

P.A. start getting the vans together. They start sending Islanders to the Kaiser Permanente on Fiji. Wasn't Kaiser kicked off the island? Kaiser was kicked off the island. So that's tricky, too. I hope that Kaiser tried. treats the burns. So they take Kaiser, they take them over to Kaiser. Kaiser goes like, you guys want to hang out or like what? And they're like so uncomfortable. They're like, uh, we just need to, you know what?

We'll just put vitamin E on it. Like, we don't want to have to do this. Yeah. So they get a bunch of vitamin E from CVS. And they bite open the capsules. They chip their tooth like I did once. Yeah. And they go back to the villa. Yeah. A lot of, a lot of injuries this episode. Yeah. Next, we have, The giving tree. The giving tree. And she's giving. She's giving. Okay. Good giving in game. So what? It's like a sex therapist says that. Wait, what? A sex therapist that I don't know their name and I don't know.

I just know that people have said, oh yeah, this one sex therapist always says like, the thing you're supposed to do to be good at sex is be good at it, giving, and game. Wait, wait, wait, I'm sorry. The thing you have to do to be good at sex is be good at it. That's kind of what I think. That's why, yeah, I don't. That's not helpful. If you understand, tell me in the comments.

It's good at it. Yeah. That's not helpful. That's not a helpful sentence. Okay. So the giving tree, who's very giving, we don't know if it's good or a game yet. No. It's absolutely giving.

She strips off her apples. She's slicing them up. Oh, and then the question is, is this stripping or is this self-harm? Yeah, it's pretty bad. She's taking off her apples. Then she starts taking off her bark. And she goes, oh, just take it all. I don't care.

Take my bag. Just take my shit. Make a boat out of my skin. Fuck. Just take my leave. You like this? You want this from me? Everyone's really actually disturbing.

Oh my God. It's really upsetting. Yeah. It's like really scary. She strips down to her skeleton. Yeah. Which we didn't know a tree had a skeleton, but it's... It does.

It does and it needs to be blurred. And also like when she strips down, you see how many rings are inside of her stump. Yeah. And it's so many. Oh my God. She's gotten a lot of work. This bitch is old. She's got a lot of work.

Yeah, this witch is old. So we blur it out because that's not safe for ITV. Because it's old. It's too old for ITV. It's too old. It's too old for ITV. For ITV. Okay, next, a lot of water gets up and floods everyone's pant.

I mean, duh. Duh. Straightforward. Good. Next, Tungis gets up and shakes its fupa of loose chips. Well, that's great. Great. Chips fall on the ground.

People are looking them up. Very cute. Absolutely. Drop some stuffing. People go, what is that? What's that? Oh, don't look at that. Oh, that's okay. Don't pay attention. Don't pay attention to that.

Don't worry about that. I'm not a mascot. I'm real. I'm real, babes. I'm real vibes. I'm G. I'm G. I'm real vibes. Next, uh, the wheel of fortune. Whoa, the newcomer to the villa gets up and goes, Bys, you want to take a spin. Whoa. Spin me right round, baby, right round.

And then the song like, you spin me right. Right around. And that's the song playing. And no one else got a song. No one else got a song. No one else got this in silence. Every islander goes up and spins the wheel. And you see these like beauty shots of the wheel spinning.

When you're born down, when you're four hundred dollars, seven hundred dollars, one million dollars. And every single time it lands on bankruptcy. That sucks. Yeah. And then the wheel goes, I'm sorry, Babes, this never happens. Oh, this never happens. Oh, my God, I'm so embarrassed. This literally never happens.

Oh, maybe next time. Maybe next time. So sorry, this is, this never happened. This literally never happens to me. And then they're like, no, we literally just saw it happen. Every single person has gone bankrupt. Every single person has spun bankrupt. It's like, no, this never happens.

It's like, sorry. I just never happens. They're like, okay, this sucks. The wheel finally gets really agro and like annoyed and goes and punches a wall in the villa up. And the challenge is over. Now it's time for the results. Whoa.

You want to know whose heart rate was raised the most by each islander? Let's start with California Pizza Kitchen. California Pizza Kitchen is in a couple with the 405, but who got its heart rate up the highest? Wheel of Fortune. Whoa. You know they always like a newcomer. Well, they love a newcomer, and also there is nothing that a restaurant would feel more stressed about than being bankrupt. That's so true.

Filing for bankruptcy. So true. That's really, really scary. So yeah, your heart rate's going to go up. Of course. Next, the 405. The 405's heart rate was raised the most by Wheel of Fortune. Oh my God.

Yeah. Or what, are they going to be a thruple or something? I don't know. That's crazy. It's the newcomers. It always happens. Kootty Tinky Wiki's heart rate was raised the most by the fire. That's beautiful.

I'm like loving this relationship. I know me too. Because I'm like I didn't expect it on any level. But they're both really fiery. But they're actually really good for each other. Burning pile of furniture's heart rate. heart rate was raised the most by that is so cute

Burning Pile of Furniture also famously loves when people play twisted like twist the dimensions of a porn screen and rim themselves Right yes they've always said that Yeah A lot of waters

Heart rate was raised the most by Rainbow Fish And Rainbow Fish's heart rate was raised the most by A lot of water That makes sense because its heart had stopped Until it got water again Giving trees heart rate was raised the most by the fire.

Because the giving tree is a masochist. That makes sense. And the tree is like, well, who could hurt me the worst? Wow, the giving tree is like kind of fucked up. Actually, very fucked up. Yeah, the giving tree's like, we're actually going to send the producers in the middle of the night to go capture the giving tree and send her to like a program. Oh my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. The giving tree is baby girl. Because she's an older woman who likes to be domed. Oh, my God. Yeah, the giving tree is baby

Watch out Nicole Kidman The Giving Tree is going to be giving the AMC speech next year Yeah Also like I'm I'm I mean this season on Love Island U.S., we've had like two Not this is a spoiler Yeah

But this season on Love Island US We've already had two islanders Have to be escaped in the middle of the night Because of racist stuff right Yeah and no one That hasn't happened in our Love Island Think about this Our Love Island

no one has fucking gone home for writing a racist tweet. No, nobody's had any racist tweets. Which is great. Which is awesome. That's awesome. But it is so wild that it's happened twice on Love Island U.S. this season. This scene insane. Anyways like, ooh, twice is like, what?

Insane. Okay, next, the horse. Ooh. The horse, the horse's heart rate was raised the most by Tombgap. Because the horse has never tasted a chip. Okay, I feel like those two have like some sort of connection. that the horse is pretending they don't have. There's kind of a will they won't leave there.

Yeah, I'm like... Tombgis's heart rate was raised the most by rainbow fish is sitting there, getting a little cocky, like, horse is going to be me. It's going to be me. Because Tombgis is like hopelessly in love of the rainbow. Yes. But Tombgis's heart rate was raised the most by Wheel of Fortune. New bombshell is making an impact.

You spin me right round, baby, right round. Then the Wheel of Fortune's heart rate is raised the most by. Tomb guests. No. And the Wheel of Fortune's like, hey, I, I'll you. And we're like, stop coming. CPK came already. Yeah, we're doing too much.

Too many people coming. Too many. We know this show is just softcore porn. But it's too much. But now it's gotten hardcore. It's too much. Yeah. And that is where the Love Island episode ends.

Guys. A team out for love. Just, uh, next time on Love Island. And just so you guys know, the things that are yet to come, picking the final four. Yeah. We've got lie detector challenge day, right, where they all take a lie detector test in front of their partners. We've got babies day and we've got family day where all the families come. Guys, there's so much shit that's going to happen in Love Island.

Vote in the comments below who you want the final four couples to be. Yep. Out of tinky winky in the burning pile of furniture. A lot of water and rainbow fish. Tungis and the Wheel of Fortune. The horse and the giving tree. And the 405 and CPK. One couple has to go home.

Who's it going to be? Who's it going to be Patreon and YouTube and Spotify? But let's be real. If you really want saying this, get on that goddamn Patreon. Because then you're a producer. Because then you're a producer. And producers, as we know, can do a lot of things. Yeah.

because of our producers on Love Island U.S. who took away two islanders in the middle of the night. Yeah. Yeah. And then they disappeared two islanders in the middle of the night. And then they truly on the show tried to act like nothing happened. That is so funny. And it's like pretty late in the game.

And one of the girls went home and it's like very late. Was she, was she there for a while? Yeah. She was like almost, she was the first bombshell, I think. Oh, shit. And she literally like, had. had racist, like, social media posts that, like, for some reason, didn't come out until right now. Wait, okay. So there were, were they both girls who got sent home for racist stuff?

Okay, because I saw the one who posted the slur. There was, there was also a boy who was super Trumpy. Right. And he had posted a bunch of anti-trans stuff. Oh, Jesus. Or, like, reposted a bunch of anti-trans stuff. And they didn't. He's still on? I mean, he's off now, but he was voted off.

He didn't. He wasn't like, the producers didn't take him off. They didn't disappear him. No, I actually was thinking about this. I was like, it's interesting that that didn't. Yeah. Like, where's the, I don't know. Anyway, why not disappear?

I don't know. Just if we're going to be disappearing people, let's disappear people. Come on. Yeah. Don't fucking pussy out about this guy. Just disappear this guy. Just because he's good for ratings. Yeah.

Don't pussy out. Disappear him. Anyway, yeah, it was really wild. But anyway, that was Love Island music. Cut the music. A game of honor. Oh. It gets really sad every time.

I came out of all. Do you fuck with activities? Do you fuck with activities? I actually fuck with activities. Actually, speaking of activities, I would love to really quickly introduce a very quick segment to the show. This is a new segment on the show called Sid's ungodly creations. Music! Cut the music!

Wait, I don't want that one. I don't want that one. No, it was funny because the music was funny. I don't want that one. You have to think about it how the music is funny. SIDS, ungodly creations. That's better, right? Yeah, I love that.

If you don't know this about me, I do pottery. I love it very much. I tend to create things that are a little bit really ungodly and bad because I'm not very good at pottery, but what I am good at is being twisted in the brain. And I, as the person who doesn't do pottery, can say that she's actually really good at pottery. But I recently made this, and every person in my life has been, like, dispositive. that. Oh, do you have it with you? Yeah. Aw.

Well, because I'm going to give it to Kat. Aw, that's cute. Okay. Does he know what it is? No. Oh, that's cute. Okay. Oh, this is beautiful, Kat. So there's this thing on my algorithm, maybe on yours. Should we look it up really quick? Yeah. Yeah, can we look up Piss Air tutorial?

Oh, oh, yeah. I know this. This is Scott on TikTok and Instagram who does Piss Air tutorials. Where he teaches you how to make Piss Air. They look like this. Today I'm gonna be teaching you how to make piss air. So basically what you're gonna need is a bunch of bottles of piss like I do right here. And you're gonna need a fan. And so basically what you do is you put a bunch of piss in the back of the fan.

And then the back of the fan will spread the air out and into the air surrounding you. And then that will create the piss vortex. And so basically what the piss vortex is, it's a vortex of piss that spins in the air. And then the piss will get you high as fuck. And that's how you make piss air. Okay. I love him. Okay. I didn't, I've never watched the video that far. He loves to show his feet

and go, okay, perfect. So he makes a bunch of these like piss tutorial. Yeah. I think they're really beautiful. They're really beautiful. And I think he's an artist. And I was fired by him. So I made a piss cup. That's a beautiful piss cup. And this is a ceramic, um, porcelain. Wasting porcelain on this is crazy, actually.

It's a fake styrofoam, right? It's a fake Styrofoam cup. And then it has a little post-it note on it that says piss cup. And my dad doesn't like it. And I try to give it to your dad. Well, I showed it. I put a picture of it on my pottery Instagram and he commented, no. I don't get why. I don't get why people don't love the piss cup. I love the piss cup. Everyone in my life except for me has been like hard no no piss cup. I love the piss cup. But it's perfect for all your piss needs. Yeah, well, it's good if you need to put piss in a cup. Yeah.

You could bring it on a road trip. Yes. So anyway, I wanted to gift this ungodly creation to our producer, Cass. Yay. Kazam, come on out here. Take your piss cup.

Take your piss cups. That's incredible. Thank you so much. Yeah, of course. Yep, take your piss cup. That's beautiful. Are you going to piss in that? I love piss so good in that. So we report back and let us know

how you're piss in it goes. Yeah, let us know how piss in it goes. Yeah. Let us know how piss in it. goes. Right? Right? It probably will.

But this is really well done. Thank you. Isn't it? You can bring it to the doctor's office. Like there's some things you can do with it. You're about to get like a piss test. Bring your piss cup. Oh, God.

It's so well done. Me ex-Kaiser, we could do those. Yes. Anyway. Sud X Kaiser. Sond X Kiser. Piss cup line. Okay.

Sud X Kaiser Piss cup line. Okay. Anyway, that was. That segment, music. Cut the music. Or else. Or else. Or else I'll cut the music.

Or else I'll cut the music. Anyway, we have, you know how the thing where you're like, oh, man, you guys are so late to everything. But we're going to get even later, motherfuckers. We're going to get so late, you're going to be like, whoa, that's late. We're going to do a trend very late. But I don't know. I think this is a fun context to do it in in the podcast. It's fun.

this multiple times, but we just like never did it. Yeah. And we were like, it's kind of fun. Let's just do it. This is the best friend's dictionary trend where someone puts on their forehead a word that is a inside joke slash term used in the friendship. And the other person has to describe, we say this when someone blah, blah, blah, or we say this when da-da-da. And then the person has to guess what it is. Guess what the phrase is. You've seen it before. If you don't understand what we're saying, you're going to get it in a second. You can always go back in time. You can always go back in like a year and then text your TikTok feed and you'll find it. Yeah. Um, okay. So let me, I'm hoping you'll know these things. I hope so too. That would suck if I didn't. This is what we would say if we were like

in an airport and the only chair to sit in is like the shittiest chair you've ever seen. Ah, the perfect chair. Is that it? Longer. Ah, well, if it isn't the perfect chair. No. Uh, longer. Well, if it isn't the most beautiful perfect chair and the, ah, the perfect, oh my God, I've been searching all my life for the perfect chair and I finally found it. Yep. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. Okay, perfect. I'll give you one.

We would say this as sort of a nonsense phrase, but the origin of the phrase is when someone charges your card for something you didn't agree to. It's for the hair babe. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's for the hair babe. Babe, it's for the hair babe.

It's for the hair babe. Yeah. That was my next one. Oh, nice, nice, nice. Okay, perfect. Let's say we love a man and respect him and love him platonically. We greet him by saying, Dad.

Yep. Okay. Okay. Okay. this is what we would say when we would see two people who look nothing like us or two inanimate objects that have nothing to do with us. That's so us and sugar babies. Yep. Perfect.

If someone did something absolutely horrific and we have nothing more to say, we would say, I have school tomorrow, sad face. Yep. This is what we would say when we are. imitating someone who is either a pathological liar or has a bunch of conspiracy theories. Hurricane Katrina is clamation. Yep. If we know someone who's kind of an anomaly and we have no idea how they are the way they are, we will say they hatched from an egg.

Yeah. Great. This is what we would call someone's Instagram aesthetic that is, purposefully artsy, like a cigarette on the ground and like a blurry picture. Grunt? Yep. Yep. Yep. Yeah.

Yeah. Their Instagram's kind of grunt. It's kind of grunt. Yeah. Sort of grunt. Yeah. Something awful just happened. We say.

Oh, so many things. I know. Hospital. I say, we say, um, ah, perfect. That's the one. Oh, yeah. Nice. Okay.

Um. Ah, perfect. Okay. Okay, this is a, okay, here you go. Good. This is what we say when we're running across the street in the rain, and we've just decided that we have to stop doing the British accent before we go to England. Oh, my God, what is it?

We just... Close. We just decided. We can't. We have to stop doing British accents. Like, God, what is it? My top hat. Close.

My hat. My hat. Oh, me hat. Close. Oh, me perfect cap. Oh, me cap is perfect. Close. Oh, me cap.

Very close. It's all pretty much in there. Oh, me cap. It's just not perfect. What is it? Cap, pit. What's the cap when it's not perfect? But it's just still great.

Me just right. Cap. Ah, me cap. Oh, me ca. Mi stewnin cap. It's me, oi, oi, my stoonen cap. Oh, yeah. That is what you don't want to say if you go to England, because that's not very nice.

I have one more. I do too. Okay, good. This is fun. I love this. Ah, me stoonen cap. If we were jaywalking or both of them are jaywalking things. If we were jaywalking or jaywalking or if somebody else was jaywalking, we would say as if we were on a loudspeaker,

That is very illegal and very dangerous. Or back in back the other. That is very dangerous and very illegal. That is what a cop said to us once on a loudspeaker when we were jaywalking. You were jaywalking. And a cop on a loudspeaker went, that is very illegal and very dangerous. And we went, sorry. Okay, here's the, here's last one for me.

Okay. This is a catchphrase. Ooi, hoi, noy. Close. This is a catchphrase we made up for. for the 70s American Girl Doll. Oh, don't trust your parents. Yep.

Julie, the American Girl Doll, if you didn't know this, her whole thing is she tells kids, don't trust your parents. Trust me. Me, not your parents. Trust me, Julie. I know the laws. Julie, I know the laws. Your parents don't know the laws.

That's what she says. Yeah, that's her whole thing. Yeah. So. And she comes with a 70s outfit. Yeah, she does. She comes to the 70s outfits and roller skates. She has a bunny and she says, don't trust your parents.

trust me instead. I'm Julie. I'm Julie. Trust me kids. Don't trust your parents. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, you guys. Thank you so much for watching. Yes. Thank you for watching. And if you want to see even more. If you want to have more of a say-in-love Island fantasy bracket, if you want to see more if you want to see more things, talk more. Do you. If you just want to hang more. Then go to our Patreon. It's only $5 and we would love to see you there. And until next time, I've been Sid the whole time. I've been Olivia still really like crazily. And we will

see you next Tuesday. Freeze frame.