Syd & Olivia Talk Sh*t - A.i.CARLY W/ JERRY TRAINOR!

Episode Date: March 4, 2025

This week Syd and Olivia welcome the very funny Jerry Trainor. Of course you know him from Nickelodeon and but maybe now you will know him as Jerry Trainor the man with 38 Green Flags. Huge episode as the girls catch Jerry up on Fantasy Love Island, confront him with his reviews from Tea, and force Jerry to act out a scene of iCarly written entirely by A.I.! Chapters 00:34 | Intro 02:14 | When Jerry Finally Sits 05:26 | Jerry Also Loves the Villa Yeah? 09:21 | Fantasy Love Island! 21:20 | Jerry Has 38 Green Flags On the Tea App 25:16 | Olivia Spills Her Coffee 26:41 | That Shouldn't Exist! 33:34 | Syd's Doctor Hates Her Knockers 40:49 | What's Wrong With Olivia? 42:37 | A.I. Carly 52:00 | Jerry's Weirdest Fan Interaction 54:34 | Do We Get Angry At Our Partners? 57:13 | Jerry Loves Consent 59:26 | A Sex-less Pact Is Made Jerry Trainor https://www.instagram.com/jerrytrainor Bonus content on Syd & Olivia's Patreon! ⁠https://www.patreon.com/c/syd_and_olivia This is a 7equis Network Show Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Here comes my sauce! The machine explodes. A tidal wave of spaghetti engulfs everyone. Sam muffled under spaghetti. This is actually kind of awesome. And then Gibby falls through the ceiling shirtless, covered in spaghetti, and says, Gubby.

All say. Gub it. You, motherfucker. It's so crazy because the note we were given is don't curse in the first 60 seconds. You want to do it again? No. All right.

Well, this is the big, big podcast for you guys. This is the big, too loud girls. That one's Sid. I'm Olivia. I'm the Sid one. That's the Olivia one. And guys, we have a very exciting guest today. But you can't see him because he's hiding within the shadows of the frame.

Amplaged. Today we've got your favorite, your favorite member of all things, Nickelodeon, your favorite member of all things, the world. Your favorite member of the male gender. Your favorite. member of the male gender, it's Jerry Trader! Come on in, buddy. Oh, yeah, you can't.

Oh, is this way? Yeah. So see this chair? So if you go there. So buddy, see the chair? So this is what you're doing is, uh, so yeah, so this is a chair tail. So that's, then there's one chair in the middle of us. That chair is being used.

So this chair is my chair. And then this chair is empty. But that chair is empty for you. Do you see that? Oh. See. you're in a plant. So you're in a plant.

So Jerry, those are two plants, not the two girls. You hit a light. Okay, that's closer. So that's, you are. You are. You're so tall. You're far too tall. Ladies, he's far too tall for our studio.

Yeah, that is like taking care of my rosacea. Yeah, that's what that's doing. Yeah. So this is, this is Jerry Trainers' first time. I'm out of the house. It's been a bit. It's been a while. Do you want to change into your comfy shoes?

I do. These are not comfortable. No. You need women's shoes far smaller than your feet. I love these. They look great. Guys, if you're listening instead of watching right now, we are all wearing matching Lightning McQueen light up crock.

Everyone stop. What kind of idiot is not watching right now? Some idiot who drives. Oh, right. Some driving. People stuck in traffic. These fit great. They look so good.

Yeah, that's so good. That's perfect. That's fantastic. Can you click them together and make them light up? Yeah. Oh, guys, we look like normal adults. Oh, good. Yay.

Jerry only agreed to be on the podcast if we all wore overalls, Oakley sunglasses, straw hats, and crocks. And here we are. Here we are wearing all those things. Look, this is how I'm retiring. And this is the look I'm going to go for. I think that's great. I think it's a great retirement. I love this. I like what she's doing.

On the sunglasses. I think that's good. Sunglasses on the hat. Oh, yeah. That's everything nice. You want to give people the window to your soul. Yeah. Are you into Republican cosplay, like, wearing things that are like. Oh, wearing like sunglasses back of your head. I'm really into it. I love the girls are doing the Republican makeup trend.

Yeah. What is that? It's like, it's like, they do quote-unquote Republican makeup, which is like, it's just white face. It's like, yeah, yeah. It's very orange. And then it's like, it's specifically bad, but maybe there's a way we can pull out. Oh, it's like Fox News host.

Yeah. Also, like just woman you went to high school with. Who's now in like an MLM and has like 12 kids. By the way, me in overalls, I'm shaped like some sort of salamander. This is, seeing me is far worse than imagining me. Oh, my God. Thank you, listeners. That's not very nice to say to my friend Jerry.

For not watching. Nobody watched this. No, that's not what we're supposed to tell people, Jerry. How are you guys? Fine. I'm sorry I entered so tentatively. No, that's okay. You didn't know what to do.

That's okay. That's totally valid. Sometimes people don't know what to do. Can I tell you this is a beautiful set though? Thank you. We didn't make it. We didn't do it. You had nothing to do with it?

Nope. Nothing at all. Yeah. But we're here. We all, so we all have Lightning McQueen crocs on. Which is a huge and important thing. And this is what you need to know about that. Yeah. Okay. When you were like, we all need to wear crocs.

Yes. Olivia and I asked separate friends if they had crocs and if we could borrow them. Okay. Both friends were like, I mean, I just have a pair of Lightning McQueen light up crocs. I just have the best versions of the thing you're asking for. One of them said that. Thanks, Tina. One of them said that. And then the other one said, I have two pairs of Lightning McQueen crox.

So that's why. Are these like a collector's item? Yeah, yeah. These are 100% rare, aren't they? So that friend who bought them had to wait in like an eBay line and like do an auction. Dude, don't give them back. I know. Just be like Jerry ate them or something.

Well, yeah, okay. We'll just get some pictures of you eating. That's crazy. So that's how we have all of these. Isn't that really fun? Yeah. Yeah. Do you want to know why I mentioned, I said it would be funny?

Yeah. I've been watching a lot of reality TV. A lady of a friend of mine got me into Love Island. Oh, it's the best. Well, this is great news. We started us. We started with Australia, which I just love. Most recent?

Yeah. Yeah. It's a crazy season. Yeah. Crazy loved it. Now I'm getting into the UK and we're just binging it. But I love that they're all wearing crocs. Yes.

Like at all times. That's really. Yeah. They're just in their underwear and crocs and they're lounging in the daybeds at the villa. And it's great. Yeah, it is really good. And starting with Australia is hard because Australia is the most insane franchise. It's the most absurdist.

They throw everything at the wall because no one's watching. Right. So they go like, I don't fucking care. do whatever. Did you watch? The truth bike? Yeah, truth is crazy. Talk about lo-fi. Truth bike is crazy. We're going to put a janky exercise bike on the astro turf, and then we're just going to hot seat

you. And the best is, and they have to, yes is the cling-ding-ling and no is a hur-huh. And they're like, they do it twice. And they're like, did you cheat on her? Kling-Kling-Kling-Kank. Krog, kong. It's kind of. And then they do it twice because they're like, I don't know, we'll do this again. In one season?

And it's like, what? With the people that were already voted off. It's like, why do we have to get on this? Don't bring them back. God, you idiot. Asking them only questions about what's happening outside of the villa? Yeah. And by the way, they made it seem so much awesomer on the outside.

Everybody that's like coupled up is like, oh my God, they went to a party. Yeah. They're partying at a hotel. Yeah, that's way more fun. It's insane. And then did you see what happened afterward? No. The guy who won.

This is spoilers for anyone. Yeah, yeah. Turn this off. The guy who won afterward came out with a whole kind of social. media campaign being like, I did all of this as a bit. None of this is real. Oh, yeah. He's like, refresh my memory. Who won?

Mercedes and M. Right. Mercedes is like, I never liked M. I don't care about M. I did this for the money. I calculated it. Do you know how much money? And do you know how much money he won off this show?

25 grand, right? $15,000 USD. So, 15 grand? Yeah. So like making. Ruined his reputation for 15 G's? Yes. Made so many.

enemies for $15,000 USD. Because he won, why would you get on it? Because now they're doing all stars where they bring favorites back. Yeah. And that was an incredible season. Like he just crapped on the whole franchise for no reason? That's correct. That's correct. I favorite part of any Love Island Australia moment was the girl

with the, um, who says she loves cremation. Oh yeah. There's a girl in, I don't know what season it was. Oh, okay. The one before this one or the one before that. But yeah. She's talking to this guy and she's like, I have a, theory. Oh no, she goes, I love cremation, yeah? Yeah. And she goes, I have a theory, yeah? I have a theory, yeah? I want to be cremated, yeah? This is out of nowhere. Be buried, or do you want to be cremated? Do you kind of be cremated? Yeah. I love cremation, yeah? I have this theory. I want to get cremated.

Yeah, and hopefully I'm like married by that siege when I die, you know, my husband's still alive. And my husband will have my ashes, yeah? But then, every morning when you're, yeah. And then, every morning when he makes a smoothie, I want him to put like a little taste bit of my ashes. So then he drinks me and then I'm with him for the rest of our lives. And then to us, we were like, so that's not a theory. Yeah, that's just what you want. That's just an opinion. Oh, she called it a theory?

Yeah. She said, I have a theory that I want to get cremated. She thinks it's like evolution. The theory of cremation. Yeah. When we all die, we turn to dust. Like infinity wool? Have you seen the ball of the movies yet?

Yeah. It's like we get snapped, right? Like when you die? Yeah. I love the villa. I love the villa. The world is like Infinity War. That's crazy.

This is great news too because we were going to eventually later on in this episode do a little update for our, we have something called the Love Island fantasy bracket where we take a bunch of... Stop it. I had no idea this was a thing. Yeah, we do. This is just what I've been like doing with no time on my hands. Oh, no, no, no. This is real. This is happening.

We take characters. talk about it? Often. This is crazy. This is serendipitous. That shouldn't be in Love Island. Okay. RFK's brainworm and the Duolingo Al's BBL and stuff.

And we put them in a Love Island villa. What does the brainworm sound like? What's his voice? That's right. That's right. So similar to RFK Jr's voice. Yeah. So we'll jump in again.

More puppity. More puppity. Okay. So we just do a Love Island update now. Sure. Let's do it. Just so you know anything you say at any point during this love Island update is 110% correct.

Okay. Great. Fantastic. This is the Sydney Olivia Love Island Fantasy Bracket music. Woo! Cut the music. Okay. That's beautiful.

So right now in the villa, we have just had a new bombshell. That bombshell is California Pizza Kitchen. California Pizza Kitchen's whole thing is that he's a reliable guy. Sorry, this is not going to say. There we go. He's a reliable guy. That's pretty much it. And now the islanders are about to have a recoupling.

Yeah. So right now, the couples are. Okay. Tombgis, the AMPM mascot made of snacks. He's like 7'6. His fupa is luce chips. Sorry. What is chito puffs?

His fupa is loose chips. His beard is chito puffs. His fupa is loose chips. His torso is bagged chips. Right. And then... Do all men have a fupa? No.

No, but his is loose chips. I don't know how to... All people have a Fupa. All people? All people have a Fupa. I don't know why I thought, look, this is the most sexist take I've ever had. Do it. I thought it was a mom jeans thing.

I thought it was the Foop. I'm not going to do the hand motion of it. Cancel. I thought it was the. I thought it was that chunky little. I thought it was a fun. You know, when you meet a chick and she's just got a fupant, it's like, oh. And you go, huh.

Oh, God, I love when you get a chick like that. Okay, well, that's an education for me. I know. We love sex ed. Well, look, I think mine's pretty visible. I like this. My crotch has like a kangaroo pouch. Yeah, mine just.

This is where I store my A&PM chips. No, it's, that's the thing about overalls is it does give you genitals you don't have. That's right. Extra gens. Yeah, extra gens. I love having extra gins here. Exter genes. Okay.

I'm like when I need them. Extra gens in my jeans Ah, so Tumgis is coupled up with The Rainbow Fish from the children's book The Rainbow Fish is dying. It sounds like this. That's how it talks. We also have Chat Chibi T with a lot of water.

Obviously, a lot of water is being used by Chat ChbT because Chat GPD uses 50 milliliters of water per prompter question. Then we have RFK Jr. who is with the Duolingo owl who has a BBL. We also have the furniture that was burning outside of Olivia's apartment, which is coupled up with Kaki tinky winky who plays straight porn on his tummy TV.

And recently we did have Scrappy Do. First thing out of Mr. Bean's chef. Yes, leave the island and he pulls off his mask and reveals he's the mayor. We've got a lot going on. And last we saw there was a little preview and there was going to be a recoupling. Right. So the islanders get a text. I've got a text.

And then. Blink. Nice. I've got a text. Nice. and then I've got a text. They all get a text. Oh, they all get a text.

Oh, they all get a text. Oh, they all get one. They all open it and read it together. Yeah, and it says, Islanders. Today, there will be a recoupling. Gather around the fire pit. Excellent. Amazing job.

Hashtag. Hashtag. Fire. We're screwed. That's really good. That was gorgeous. That's really good. That's really good.

Hashtag. They gather. They gather. around the fire pit, obviously. The two hosts, which are Young Sheldon and Mark L. Walberg. My God. From Temptation Island. The lightning strikes the earth, and in the burning rubble of the lightning, they appear

out of the ashes. Both of their heads spinning. Both of their heads. Their faces spin around their heads. Then their heads spin around. Their faces. And then they say, I feel like I'm having a stroke.

They do too. And they're about to start this recoupling ceremony. When? When a cyber truck. Sweet. Comes into the villa and crashes into the Duolingo owl, which is real. Canonically, just we were late on this, and I know we were late on this, but we didn't have a Love Island update. Ladies and gentlemen and non-binary friends, we have to tell you, the Duolingo owl has died.

That breaks a like a 90-day streak. I know. It's so bad. Of it being alive. It's true. It's true. The Duolingo owl was canonically killed by a cyber truck. Duolingo went all over social media spreading this.

And then the German Duolingo account is posting some extra shit. Oh dear. Like how there's a German BDSM ghost that comes out of the duolingo owl and does a dance when the duolingo owl dies. There it is. Canonically. Canonically this happens. So that happens on the island, obviously. Right.

How many duolingo owl? are there that this is canon? Well, it's the duolingo owl multiverse. I see. And so they're dying kind of often. Oh, all the time. I think so. Is there like a planet of the owls?

Yeah, of the planet of the owls. Yeah. Planet of the owls. And they're all, they're all polyglots. Yeah, it's pretty sad. So the duolingo owl dies and obviously R.FK Jr. is devastated. Because of the bondage? Yeah, it's hard.

Bondage shit. You know, maybe don't shame him. No, I love it. I'm loving it. I'm just shocked. Although that's a thong. That's revealing a bit too much. Yeah.

Oh, that's where you draw the line? That's where it draws the line. Right up the goddamn asshole. You know where I pulled that joke at him? Right out of my crotch pouch. So the duo, that one's in a toilet. I can't even look. So the duo lingo al dies.

And they flush it? Yeah. And the, yeah, you flush it down the toilet. How you do it. do with a used goldfish. Do you do with a used owl? And the, um, and the hosts say, where's it going? Where's it going?

Where do you go when you die? To the ocean. It goes to the ocean. Oh, go to the ocean when you die? When you flush something down the toilet, it goes to the ocean. Oh. Wow. So then the hosts come forward and say, um, Islanders, this was going to be a recoupling.

This is now a funeral. So everyone's going to go around and say something nice about the duolingo owl. Um, Tombgis obviously starts because we get some sad music. Yeah, we'll get some sad music under here. Which one is Tombgis? The Ampian mascot. He says, you know. He says, you know, like,

I love the dolingo owl because it was always trying to eat me loose chips and I quite like the BBL and I quite like that it was chill. Like he's not the smartest guy. He's from AMPM. So then the rainbow fish, it comes to the rainbow fish

and he says, he says, Right, because he is dying because he needs water. ChatGBTGPT next says Fats about the Duolingo owl include it had a recent BBL

it was a big part of the bondage community it would go to play parties all the time and it always made sure you were taking your French it's not very emotional but it is objectively true and that's kind of what ChatGBTGT is saying is a lot of water

says I quite like the duolingo owl owl bow That's how a lot of water. What is a lot of water? Just a lot of water. It's just a ton of water. It's like a shit ton of water.

Right. I quite like when the Dio lingo I would spread his cheeks back. Yeah. It reminded me of home. Right. And then while this is happening, we see shots of both chat GPT and the rainbow fish who both have a crush and fancy a lot of water. Because the rainbow fish needs water to live. Chat GPT needs water to answer prompts.

Of course. So there's a love triangle. there that's very sticky. Right. And then of course, Tinky Winky comes up and says, uh-oh. And then straight porn plays on his tummy TV and everyone has to usher him out. Oh. Yep. And then there's no, there's no on-screen captions. No, no, no. He meant is, uh-oh. There's usually on-screen captions. Um, next we have, the burning pile of furniture. Oh, yeah. What is the burning pile of furniture? What do you think, Jerry? What is the burning pile of furniture? I can't even remember who died.

The duolingo owl died. The duolingo owl died. Here's the thing. Did the burning furniture have any relations previously with the duolingo owl? She's a girl's girl. She's a firecracker. She's a pocket rocket. He's like really girl forward.

Yeah. She's super excited. It's more like a you go girl. Yeah. Right. She's buzzing. She's not buzzing now. No.

She's fully cooked. Yes. Because she's burning furniture. And she's like, I can't believe. I'm so sad. Duolingo. owl. It's the only way we could translate. It's the only way I could get the varnish to be flammable. And I'm just cooked. That's literally exactly what she said. That's beautiful. That's what she says.

I was repeating what I heard. No, that's literally exactly what she says. CPK comes forward. CPK goes, hey guys, just got here really freaking bummed about the duolingo owl. I didn't know her well, but I do serve chicken at my restaurant. So I do know birds. And birds be awesome. And like, shout out, so sorry. Poor one out, brother. We have lemonade all day.

Can I say I'm super shocked that the California Pizza Kitchen is actually from California? Because the 8 p.m. kind of threw me. No, most people aren't. But California kitchen is pretty great part. He's definitely right from where it sounds like he's from. 100%. And then everyone turns out of it. to RFK Jr.'s brainworm.

This is who was coupled up with the Duolingo owl. So they're expecting. He must be devastated. He's crushed. He must be crushed. So then they all turned to him to make his speech. He goes up and the only thing he says is, BBL.

BBL. What? Can you fucking believe that guy? Can you believe how fucked up that guy? What does that even stand for? I've never heard. A resilient butt lift. The Duolingo Howl had a Brazilian buttlift.

Imagine a man sexualizing a corpse bird, with a Brazilian butt lift. How fucked up is that? It's disgusting, dude. Disgusting. Thank you for being an ally, Jerry. That makes me nauseous, frankly. Jerry, you're a feminist.

Yeah. Yeah. That's right. Jerry. I mean, I think my Fupa take proves that. Yeah, 100%. Yeah, you're literally such a feminist. I've never met a more feminist feminist.

Okay, so that was the Love Island update, and next week, you're going to see something worse. And play music. Come on music. I got a fan of my favorite. love. I keep thinking you're going to sing Wrecking Ball. Yeah, it's the first notes are the same. I'm pitch perfect. One day I'm going to put out SIDS bops and it's just going to be me singing things wrong and worse. I want every volume. No, you don't.

They're going to be too long. Can we tell you something that you can tell us to cut from the show? Yes. Oh, my God. I know exactly what it is. Oh, ooh. Okay. So, contra supremacy. Okay. So there's this app. There's this app that I... Do you know about this? No.

But any time someone has told me there's this app. It's not... Listen, I'm going to be honest. It's a scary start to the story, but it's not a bad ending. It's a very good ending. So there's this app. Yeah. Just go ahead and clap your Lightning McQueen Crocks before we start.

So there's this app called T. We are not sponsored because they don't sponsor us. But if you want to, that's... T-E-A, like tea. Okay, like spill the tea. It's gossipy. Yeah, it's essentially. What?

Don't want to be like that. Dude. It's Yelp for men. It's Yelp for men and it's girls. They tried this once before. Yeah. They're trying this like a long time ago. I don't know.

But this time they're really going for it and they're like having people review men on this Yelp for men. Oh, fantastic. We were looking up everyone we knew. Uh-huh. Every person we've ever met. Okay. We pretty much couldn't find any of them.

Hey, thank God. we've never met before because I... Except... We did find you. And do you know what your score was? No. You had 38 green flags and no red flags. Every comment was like, this guy is so lovely.

Whoa, whoa, wait, wait just a minute. Is this like people I've dated? Yeah, people you know people have gone on dates with you. And like, this guy was awesome. Or like, this guy went on a date with my friend. He was great. I feel so naked. I know.

I feel so exposed. We can cut it. And I'm wearing overall. Yeah. I know. I'm the most covered. I'm the most not exposed. I know.

You're anti-exposed. In fact, it'd be hard to pee right now. Let's get into it. All right. Yeah. What makes you have green flags? I don't know. Why do you have 38 and no red flags?

What is? What is it say? Wait. It just says you're a great guy. Jerry, are you ready? As fast as you can, list all 38 of your green flags. Are you ready? This segment calls Jerry lists all 38 of his green flags.

Ann, go. Go. One. Oh, I. After this by home? We'll jump in if you run out. Listen. I don't know.

I'll listen. I listen. I listen. I'm a listener. Two. Great job. Pay for dinner. Three.

Leave space for women. Four. I'm going to jump back in. Great hat. Five. I would never wear this on a day. Six. Excellent style.

Seven. Yeah. Nice style. Nice voice. Eight. Gorgeous voice. Listen, I think I can be, I can get them laughing. get get him laughing yeah he can get a laughing good face good face good oh terrible that's

terrible 10 10 I'm out I've tapped we've 28 more that's there's no world tall tall okay height height and hair 12 11 12 13 I got long and 13 uh 12 and 13 nice you're nice yes I'm not I think I'm nice I'm a nice person 14 you you you you you've let us in the same room with you, which is really nice. I don't normally do that. Yeah. Please stop.

Okay. Please, mercy. He watches Love Island. Uncle. Okay. So those are 15 of the 38. And if you have the other one.

Yes, there's 38 green flags. Yeah, but not each green flag is a separate flag. No, but in this game, there's got to be. How dare me. It's got to be a lot of repeat. It could be.

No, it's just 38. Do you have this booted up? Can I see it? Yeah. Olivia has it somewhere, which I think is in my purse, which is- I got to see, this is, this is killing. It's kind of awesome. Thank you.

First off, it's a little like, also I went on 38 days. Yeah, no, that's okay. I'm depressed. Dude, like, 38 dates is like a great number of dates to go on. You don't have to, you don't have. Uh-oh. This is just a segment called Olivia drops her coffee. This makes Eric Andre look organized.

Thank you so much. I'm so sorry. Well, I mean, that's... Yeah, it's pleasant to make sure you're not predators. I mean... But isn't that kind of nice, though? Yeah. I mean, yes, though, I know that.

You know what I mean? It's like, not to get, like, heavy, but like, what a weird time we're in that it's like... Yep. Like, uh-oh, what, you know, what's it say? You know what I mean? Like, ha, you know, where you have to question your own self. 100%.

Oh, I'm constantly being like, have I done something in a fugue state that I don't remember? But that's probably because you're a good person and I think good people are generally going like, am I a bad person? Yes. I hope I'm not a bad person, whereas bad people are like, I don't ask them that. Bad people are like, you guys are all bad. I'm good. I'm the best.

Yeah. Yeah. It's, it's, I think that now more than ever, we all have just the most anxiety about being like, oh, I must be the worst. Yeah. It's not a hurt anyone's feeling. It's like the stupidest people think they're the smartest. Yeah.

Because they never ask them, you know, they just don't, they're not self-aware. And there's really nothing more annoying than like. like a stupid person who is really loud about the fact that they're smart. Yes, that's bad. It's the word. Well, you'll never get that for me. I'll tell you that much. We have another segment that we're really excited about called,

Oh, that shouldn't exist. Play the music. Oh, my God. Okay, and cut the music. I didn't hear anything. Okay, crazy. That's so weird. That must be your age, Jerry.

What? So we, this. This is a segment. Oh, my God. Dude. It's okay. Olivia! I like shouldn't be... What are you doing? I like shouldn't be allowed to move.

You are breaking... Do you know how much this cost me? We are introducing a segment to the podcast called, oh, that shouldn't exist, where we talk about something in the world and the culture, in the current events that just shouldn't exist. Cultural, it's got to be cultural? It can be anything. Okay. Today, sometimes.

we really quickly want to talk about that shouldn't exist are build a bear after dark teddy bears yep uh this is a real this is not real this is wrong um come on these these are build a bears i was here to be less depressed that one is dressed like a hooker like it looks like me like that's how i dress and it's a cougar like this is ages these are builda bears intended intended for an over 18 audience. They ask you when you get on the website if you're over 18 like it is porn. It's drinking. I mean, you get two bucks off. You get two bucks off. So some of the, the bears include the lovable lion stuffed animal Zaddy gift set, which is, of course, this Zaddy with a shirt that says Zaddy and a dirty martini. He's wearing chucks? Yep. With a nice martini glass. There's one where he has

this. This guy lives in Silver Lake. Yeah. There's one where he has a smoking robe or a smoking jacket. Okay. There's also the giant, There's also the giant red hot hugs teddy bear, which shouldn't exist. Oh, this is bad. Oh, what? This is an ad. Do they make it sensual?

Yeah. She's a cougar. She's on the prow. Looking for a good time. Hear her growl pur. This cat is in her prime. Oh, she's in her prime. That's messed up.

She's too fap to ignore. She's got her heels and she's ready for more. She's ready for more. She's a cougar cougar. Now, we don't have the volume on, but I don't think it's a song. I don't think we needed the volume on. I think that was perfect as is. I don't think it's a song.

Oh, and here's a good one. She puts the hibernation in menopause. There's also a toy that is just called the Jennifer Cat Plush. I don't know. What's that? I don't know. So let's chat about it. Are these toys fuckable?

Do I want to fuck them or with someone? Does it feel like they have a hole? Oh. I know they. Oh, do. I feel like that should be front and center if that's what they're selling. That's such a good point. Kind of feel like they should have a hole. And I kind of feel like they don't. Advertisement that says there's a hole.

There just should be a collab between the bear cave, which is what that's saying, right? Yep. And fleshlight. Just make it a fleshlight sleeve. 100%. Cut out the middleman. Just cut out the middleman. And you know what? I call the middleman my genital oil. So it makes perfect sense.

Cut out. Is bears genitals? Yeah, it is pretty wild. Oh, there's a French one. I saw some pictures of some bad shirts. So here are some shirts for the animals. So how do you feel about that? These, those are the clothes that you can put on your sex bears?

Sex bear. This is Bill DeBear? Yeah, yeah. This is sanctioned by Buildabair. 100%. No, it is. Yes, it is. Yes, it is.

Who do they think they're catering to you? I don't know. Who is the demographic? Red, white and booze? I thought Build a bear was for kids. No, it is. And then they went, you know what we should do? Sex it up.

Who made that mentally? Yes. And you know what? No one good. Yeah, no one good. Yeah, the Builder Bear companies. This bear has a shirt that says nice package. And what I have to say is that is false advertising because we can see its bottoms and there is nothing.

Yeah, it's got no job. Like when you look at this teddy bear's bottom, there are no genitals. There is no nice package. It's nothing but for. Talking about Christmas presents, you disgusting people. They are not. They are talking about... But there's pictures of Christmas present.

No. He is making a really good point, then. I'm making an excellent point. No, this is sick. This is sick. This is the sickest website. It's really good. What is that?

Is that an anteater? It's just a Capabara. Oh, it's a Capabara. Okay. Let's talk about, like, the boardroom deciding to do these. Yeah. What do we think their pitch was? Sex sells.

Sex sells. And Build a Bear is going. out of business. True. Let's horn it up. Let's get hornedry. Here's my pitch. I think someone went up and went,

all right, guys. That's it. Does anyone else want to fuck the bears? Yeah. Does anyone else want to fuck the bears? And then everyone went... And then put their sunglasses on and went, okay, yeah, you got.

You got to fuck the bears. Yeah, okay. You got a joke. Yeah, okay. You got off. I desperately do. I want to bang the bears. I'll be honest.

I apply. for this job when I thought it was called bang a bear. Yes. That's what I thought. They should call it bang a bear. Wait, why is it not called bang a bear? That's the biggest swing and a miss I've ever seen. The biggest thing.

It should be not the bear. It should be the bang a bear. It's proposing to you, Jerry. There was a person behind that doing it from behind. Yeah, I didn't like that. Where was it? The bunny. The bunny.

Look, and it's a child. They have a picture of a child on a website that's 13. Disgusting. This is disgusting. I want this website. Yes. Remove it. I want this website removed right now. Contact GoDad.

Contact GoDaddy. You tell them their daddy is calling and wants this website gone. Daddy wants it. Take it down. They're just going to go to Gozaddy. Here's what I really think they were thinking when they made this. I think they thought Disney adults are a thing. Yep. The furry community is a thing.

These things are things. Let's capitalize off of it. Let's make a profit off of adults who are children who are adults. Chocolate covered strawberry underwear set. Sid, I think you're exactly correct. And it's what I said. I would wear that. I have those boxer briefs.

Yeah. Very ones. And you're wearing them right now. Show us. You're wearing them right now. The problem is you're going to be shocked by my extra genitals. I wasn't ready to reveal that when you invited me here. When you trapped me.

I'm so sorry. We trapped you. God, we just absolutely fucked this. Oh, my God. Sorry, Jerry. This podcast is like. the equivalent of a strobe light. Hell yeah.

Dude, I think it's worse. Hey, Jerry. It was my nose bleeding? Wait, can I tell you story about the hospital? Yeah. Yes. Okay, guys. Just the hospital?

Once upon time, the hospital. Well, today I was at the Kaiser. God, I need to stop talking about Kaiser. Every episode of this podcast, I'm just shitting on Kaiser Permanente. Get them. Get them. Get them. Today I was at Kaiser because I have a lump in my breast.

Does that make you uncomfortable? Do you want to feel it? That is frightening. Does that make you uncomfortable, Jerry? Are you comfortable for say? Are you an ally or does that make you uncomfortable? A little nervous. A real feminist would offer her to be happy for me.

A real feminist would be happy for me. I'm assuming you're talking about your nipple. I have another breast growing out of my breast. Okay, what is happening over there? She is melting down. Can I tell you we're all stone cold sober right now? By the way, this is the effect. have on women on all my 38 dates.

They just glasses start flying off their head. 38 ever is crazy. Look, I'm much older than you guys. No, you're not. I've just been alive for a long time. No, I've been single for a long time. You're just like a minute or two older than us.

That's great. Thank you for that. So wait, what happened to you in the hospital? Yeah, what happened to the hospital? I was at Kaiser because I have a lump in my breast. And you're happy for her? Yeah. We get it. Bragging.

So I have a lump in my breast. Okay, don't ask for picks. They're friggin' real and fabulous. This lump is real. This lump is real. No doctor's use. Okay, so anyway, the lump in my breast has been moving into my armpit. And I really think...

It's alive. I'm so upset. I really think it's a backed up lymph node. I think so too. I'm going to also tell you that... Do you ever do one of those, like, ice roll? or the like the metal thing where you do that shit. Yeah.

I love that. I mean, I just feel right, but I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I do it. Main character. On my booby? No, no, no, just wherever.

On your booby. You want to know if I put it on my booby? Yeah. Okay. I want you to show us. I want you to show everyone what you do. So anyway, I have a button on my teat. I have like a lump on my teeth.

Where's it moving? It's moving into my arm pit. How fast is it moving? It's slow. When did you find it? September. Where is it now? It is here.

You found it in September? Yeah. And you just went today. No, this is my second visit. I went to the doctor. What did they say? The first visit. They were like, I think it's probably like a swollen lymph node thing.

You're probably fine. What do you mean? Probably. Are these doctors? Where did you go? Kaiser. I went to Kaiser. I don't think they're doctors.

They're kind of not. I went to Kaiser. They're bad there. I've, yeah. I'd be like you would want to specific, some specific information. Well, today I went back in and the doctor looked at my boobs. He was the most uncomfortable person who's ever looked at my boobs.

He hated doing it. He had to touch them. He had to touch them and he kept going, oh, excuse me. Skin to skin? No, no, no, no, gloves. And then kept saying, sorry, my hands. Nurse in the room or nurse not in the room? Nurse in the room.

And then she left and he kept being like, sorry. And then he freaked out. No, he was freaking out the whole time. The whole time he was like, I don't want to be here. I don't want to be doing this. And I was like, it's just boobs. I'm sorry. You're talking.

And he was like, I hate this and I was like, for sure. Are you going to post this guy on tea? No. Because this is a red flag man. I think it's a green flag. Because that's, I'm surprised because that's how I am when I say, I go, I don't want to do this. I don't want to do it. I don't want to do it.

38 green flags. Look at it. Look at it. And it's always somebody being like, I have a lump. Can you tell me if it's moving? Right. So basically. Did he touch the lump?

Yeah, he touched the lump. Did it move around? Yeah, a little bit. Have you touched the lump? Yeah, of course. Is it hard? So it used to be. Any kind of shape? What is it now?

It shifts. It shifts? What shifts textures? Sometimes it's jelly. Sometimes it's hard. You felt it. I have a... You felt it? I felt it.

What do you think it is? I hope with all my heart that it's a swollen lymph node or a little bacterial infection or something. How big are we talking about? A quarter, dime, nickel? All my heart. The bump. Not how big is your heart? How big is your heart?

Is it a quarter-sized? How does it beat? How do you get enough blood to the head? This big. Yeah. Like a quarter. Like a quarter. The thing is a quarter.

Like a quarter. That's very large. It's pretty big. So anyway, it comes and goes. So I was like kind of confused. And I went in and I, where, what was I talking about? You went to the doctor and you hated feeling you up.

So sorry. Right. He hated squeezing your knocks. He hated squeezing my knocks as most people do. And he was like, okay. Were you like motorboat? It's really a lot. He was like, okay, you're going to have to go.

get like an x-ray and a blood test because it's either. No. No. This is so bad. This is so bad. He was like, I mean, listen, it could be like. Don't think of an x-rays? Don't we have x-rays for this?

He was like, wait a minute. Is this, when do you get, what age do you get your first mammogram? 50s? No. In your 50s? Right? I thought everybody gets them. No.

Late 40s? 50s? I don't know. 40s? God. I don't know. I thought it was just something goes like, part of like your gynecological checkup.

I have to ask that. I don't, yeah. We have to ask our male producer when you get a mammogram because men know everything. Oh, you have to start once you're 45, but you can start at 40. Okay, queen, do you think I'm 40? Whoa. Are you 40? Have you gotten one?

I get them all the time. Nice. That's how I know. So he said it's either. He was like it's either an infection like from getting bacteria in your armpit from shaving. Right. or blood cancer. Light them up.

So 25. It's so 2025. Take us away. Rocket. What's its name? Lightning Queen. Now I got to tell you, he would love to know that after saying that to you guys

that I clapped my Lightning Queen Crooks. Yeah. But the thing is I don't think is blood cancer. I really do think it's just an infection thing. But I had to go to get an x-ray. And I am like truly like I am a bat signal for older women. Like old women love me. They love her.

Old European women especially are in love with me. It's a magnet. What does you mean you're a bat signal? Like they're a bat signal. Like they're a batman and I'm a signal. Like if you were standing on like a roof of some gothic building, old women come running for you? That's correct. I am a moth.

They are a flame or vice versa. Oh, they just want to talk to you. Oh, they love it. Well, who doesn't? No. Come on. I'm sitting here with two of America's sweetheart. No, no, no.

No, that's America's sweetheart. and I'm America's little mud monster. What are you doing? People under the age of 80 are like, you get out of my dishes because I'm hiding. Why are you in their... That's because you keep hiding in people's dishes. Yeah, what's she doing in their cupboards.

I know what's wrong with you today. What's wrong with you? What's wrong with you? I'm pretty sure that medical checkup had something to do with it. There's a... What's wrong with me today? I don't know.

I actually am curious, Jerry, as to what you think is medically wrong with me. Because I'm getting comprehensive assessment to find out what's wrong with me. Just in general? Yeah, just like what I have in here. And you've known me for a hot set. I've known you for a long time.

People are putting money on ADHD. People are putting money on OCD. People are putting money on anxiety. Do you have a, do you want to put a... Wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute. Wait a minute. For what are the symptoms here? Whatever my personality is.

When they go, what's wrong with you? What are they pointing at? Guests or doctors. Your excellent personality? your ravishing good looks. You're literate, your literate. I'm literate. Wait, that was the nicest way anyone's ever played this game.

All right, I'm going to count that. Green flag, everybody. That's green flag number 39. I'm going to count that as his vote. So sorry, everyone. Yeah, it's just called being awesome. That's his, okay, cool. And if it's autism.

Wait, more are these people that are diagnosing you. Well, it's the game. What game? the game of life the game were playing I don't know what this is I was given no information this freaking

love island psychotic Jerry you were in I Carley yeah are we really moving on are we moving on I just thought that would be the most like

hard left here's the thing yes I was there will be no end to anything here that's happening because I don't know what's happening

no anytime a segment starts instead of it ending we just start a new segment in the middle of it so this is a new segment called a i carly music cut the music i loved it okay that's a great that's a great rendition of the theme song oh my god um so here's the thing uh jerry you remember when you're on i carly do you remember that do you remember hugh play i played uh freddie yeah spencer yeah you play spencer yeah You play Spencer or brother. Yes. Spencer.

It takes place at a monastery. Yeah. One of the cool things about Icarly, like a lot of other shows, is that it is written by people. Yeah. The thing we love about it is it's written by real people writers. Can I just, I think I'm going to take it back. There is something wrong. Like your show, like a lot of shows is written by people.

You have to the end of the episode. I'm taking back the literate. I'm taking about literate. I'm taking that back. I'm putting it right in here. my extra genitals. Perfect. Yes.

It's written by people. Which we love. Which we love. Which we love. We love. You agree? Do you love it? I agree.

I think most, I think shows should continue to be written by people. Did you strike? Technically. Did you strike? Of course. Of course. We love.

Of course you stroked. Yeah. Of course you stroked. Dude. So Queen, we love. I was on the stroke lines. I was on the stroke lines. Stroking it.

Stroking it. Just stroking it. Just stroking it. Um, okay. So queens. We love when people write things, but today we're going to show you why it's so important that people write things. So this is we asked AI to write an episode of I Carly featuring Carly, Sam, and Spencer. And here it is.

Let's do it. Let's do it. AI Carly. Light them up. Light them up, baby. Light them up. Okay. Here's your script.

Oh, God. We have scripts. Well, I never taught that I be so simple. All right. Say fun. That's good. Drake and Josh, what's the I-Carly one? I know.

You know. The web is same-lame-same-same-bib-a-ta-be-so-m-dib-top. That is like, yeah, an AI version. You'll see it on Zizbo. That is the AI version. Okay. So this was written by AI. It's really bad.

So we're going to read out loud. People on the Internet used to refer to us as Carly and Sam of the Internet back in 2020. That's true. Because we were being nuts. Because we were allowed and we had. two different color hair. So do you want to be Carly Carly? I'll be the dark-haired one, yep,

and I'll be the light-haired one. Here we go. I like that the title has already got it wrong. That's correct. You want to read it? Normally like I do something or I-I-S-and-it's, which doesn't, it's not a thing, I-Spenser's Big Day. I-Spensers, okay, so.

It's not like I have a new painting or something. All right, so it's AI Carly and the episode is, I Spencer's big day Fade in Interior I Carly apartment day I Carly and Sam are sitting on the couch looking forward

Is I Carly Yes I Carly says wow I'm so bored There's literally nothing to do in Seattle anymore Sam eating a giant ham says speak for yourself Carl's This ham is entering the entertainment

Yeah entertainment spelled wrong That Entertainment Then it says Carly and there's just nothing. There's no dialogue. Just a nice pregnant pause. Sam says. That's where the laugh track would go.

Why don't we just like do I Carly? Carly confused. What is I Carly? Sam even more confused. Don't make me punch you. Our web show. Carly, yes. Spencer runs through the ceiling.

What? I ran. I run through the ceiling. Yes. Covered in feather. and holding a sculpture of a duck made of taco spaghetti. Now that would work. Yep.

That would work. That's probably something a duck made of taco spaghetti. Yeah, but it's AI tried. It's best. Guys, something huge is happening. By the way, all cats, they nailed me. AI nailed me. You are lighting yourself on fire again?

No, even better. And then I Carly says, this is the worst day of my life. I like where this is going. Spencer throws a smoke bomb. Nothing happened. Then slowly a very small amount of smoke come out. Cut to... No!

That was last week. This time, I'm going to build a giant spaghetti machine. Question mark? What does that even mean? It's like a vending machine. But for spaghetti You put in a dollar And boom

Spaghetti Can I put in my fist instead of a dollar? I mean You could But that's a moral issue Awkward silence Then I don't know Spencer. This sounds really stupid

Exactly That's why I did it Interior Spencer Inside That's what it's next. It's in me. The old lady, which we haven't met yet, the old lady throws a pie at Spencer and walks away.

By the way, stunt casting, who's the old lady? That's the old lady. That's Cassum. That's Cassum's the old lady. Yeah. Love it. Cut two. Scene two, Spencer's Workshop.

It's in a different format now. It's written in a different play, like a different, it's not written like a script anymore. Like it changes formats halfway through. Yep. Spencer is welding random things together. There are sparks everywhere, the ceiling. alarms are going off in the background for no clear reason.

Now, here's question. Just sorry, we're rehearsed. This is a rehearsal. Yeah, of course. I will say we are rolling, but. Oh, right. This is on top. It's in italics.

Yeah. So I'm wondering, is this like an aside to myself? Yeah, I think this is all in a side. Am I like thinking? Am I musing to myself or something? Yeah, I think so. What is AI thinking? You know what?

Yeah, hit me. I would say, like, have fun with it. Yeah. Just do a fun. Just play with it. Do a take just for you. You got it. See what we do.

Let's see. We'll fix it in post. I say, this is my spaghetti machine, said Spencer. Carly walks in immediately dodging a flying wench. What is going on? Science, Carly. Cut to a horrible-looking contraption that is leaking marinera sauce. It's literally just a vending machine covered in duct tape and spaghetti

noodles. Yes. I Spencer presses a giant red button. The machine shakes violently. Here comes my sauce. The machine explodes. A tidal wave of spaghetti engulfs everyone. Sam muffled under spaghetti. This is actually kind of awesome. And then Gibby falls through the ceiling shirtless, covered in spaghetti and says, guppy. All say. Gub it. And that was AI Carly. That's pretty good. Isn't that pretty good? I think that's better than the reboot.

Oh. I think that's pretty good. I mean, they really nailed the spaghetti taco and the machines and the contraptions and the fun and the whimsy. The fun and the whimsy. It's all there. You did a great job. You committed 110%. You did amazing.

I appreciate that so much. I really think we saw a side of your character. We don't usually see. I like the very special episodes Those are the ones Those are the ones that speak to me The ones with like a lot of heart A lot of heart

We have seen We've seen more of your character Than we ever have gotten to see This is the first script that ever has Interior Spencer Yeah I've not been on like AI's side Yeah

But I definitely think it should replace writers Well we accidentally fucked up And we've done the opposite of what we intended Yeah yeah yeah no You've really sold me on this whole Chatty-D tea situation I guess all the water in the world should go to AI.

Oh, shit. Yeah. I guess. I guess. I mean, it only makes sense. It only makes sense if we're getting jims like this. You want me to sign this? Yeah, if you could, I could.

Yeah, if you could sign it. I will. I will, but I'm good and ready. If you could sign Sid's lump, if you could sign my lump in my breast. Let's get it going. It's moved to my armpit. Would you rather have a scary lump or a scary interaction with a stranger?

That's a great question, Olivia. First of all of all right, every interaction with a stranger is terrifying. Yeah, I agree, actually. Let's be real. Yeah. Have you? I've never had an okay interaction in my entire life. Just ever?

Ever. With anybody? Anyone. Do they let you out of here? No. Well, we know you go from here direct to Kaiser. I go right to Kaiser and come back. She's a Kaiser pass.

You go right to Kaiser for a motorboating. Yeah. Oh, God. my favorite place to be. Have you ever gotten motorboated as a out of Kaiser? Who hasn't? You're not an Angelino until you have. It's one of the last few. Have you ever, have you ever signed someone's lump? Yeah, it's all the time. What's the weirdest thing a fan has done to you? Yeah. Jeez, the weirdest? Yeah. It's all weird. It's all weird. I love it, but it's all.

Okay, the weirdest I think was one time I was at a restaurant and this person sat down and they where had been there with their family, they came over and said hi, which I don't mind. I love that. Like, ah! Yay, I love. And then they sat down and they just didn't leave. They wouldn't go.

And it got, and normally I let it play out to the point where it's like, they'll, they'll know to eventually go. And this person, I stayed for so long that I was like, I have to tell you, like, I'm here with a friend of mine. We're like catching up. and so and got they got a little miffed with me and I was like

I gave you more time than like anybody ever it was an absurd it was an absurd amount of time it was an absurd amount of time they sat they sat down I was an outdoor like patio restaurant and I was on like a

corner bench and they just right right down next and started going like so what? Like what's that like and started like going and I was like Oh, what's my food like? What I haven't eaten? What's my time?

I haven't eaten a bite yet. I was going to do this. What's my lunch with my friend like? It interrupted. That is. It's cold. It's cold now. Crazy.

Yeah. Wow. It's generally not like that. It's so rare. Right. Totally. Right. Weird.

Like weirdest. That is, that is, I can't imagine. I just like doing it. It's really good. Yeah. Can we go to like a poetry slam and then instead of doing snap. Yeah. Or instead of doing a.

poem we just go up and do this. Um, do you have any closing questions? What have you guys been like craving? Oh, dude, no, no lump in my breast? Yeah, same. Same.

I've actually been craving your breast lump. Yeah. To eat. Do you want, I was wondering if I got door dashed that? White meat or dark meat? The whole thing. I want all of it.

I'll just shove it in the air fryer. Want all the capillaries? That's gross. That's so gross. Oh my God. Okay. You think my breast lump is bros? I thought... Eating it! You think breasts are disgusting. Oh, I think it's super hot,

but eating it. It's sexy. You would think my breast lump is sex? It's very similar to a hot bilta bear. Something I really like is being fake angry. Oh, yeah. Have you noticed? Do you think of yourself as an angry person typically? No. When you're dating, what do you get angry? No. I'm pretty chill. Oh, you disagree. Here's a personal question. Here's a personal question. I was just going like, I was thinking, I was thinking about myself. Do you get angry? Do you get angry at boyfriends? No, I am so conflict avoidant that it's bad.

That it's bad. You don't address what's happening. Anything whatever is so bad. Do whatever. I do think you have a reservoir of rage. I'm Italian and Irish, so once there's a threshold crossed. And German, she doesn't say that one. Yeah, I don't usually say that one.

But yeah, there's like a once the like, There's like a threshold cross. I get really mob blood on people. But it has to be like a really bad thing. Because I don't like, I don't like being angry. Right. If I'm angry, it's because. How are you in when you're alone in your car and people are driving crazy?

Do you road rage? No, I apologize to that. You apologize by yourself and they don't even get to hear the apology. 100%. Sid? I mostly just kind of talk to myself being like, oh, what the fuck? Okay, that's fine. When you're in the car and you're dating.

I kind of always have the impression of someone who is stoned. Yeah. Actually, it's the best. I'm such a good fucking babysitter. And it's because I talk to kids like they're my stoner buddy. Yeah, that's true. And like I'll literally, like every kid has been so chill with me. The second I babysit?

I love babysitting. Really? Yeah. Your friends give? She babysit me. I babysit. No, I ask people to babysit and they're like, no. And I'm like, yeah.

You just go up to strangers, be like, nice baby. No, like if I have a friend. Like, yeah, I will. Yes. I love to sit babies. And I literally will just talk to them and be like, dude, what are we doing today? Yeah, and I'll be like, do you absolutely love cocoa melon or what? And they'll be like, and I'll be like, oh my God, cocoa melon in the house or something.

I started doing that because I saw how well it worked. It works. Now I have like little. Doing cocoa melon? Doing cocoa melons. Getting a lump in your cocoa melons. Oh my God, dude. My cocoa melon.

I saw Sid, I saw Sid, like treat kids like stoners. So I started doing the same thing. But my problem is I always curse. And so it was, it's like extra hard for me to not be like, oh, dude, that fucking rips to like a four-year-old girl. You could bleep it. You could bleep it out. I say that's iconic because my impulse is to say fuck yeah. And instead of saying, fuck yeah, I go, that's iconic.

You know who said iconic all the time? Who? Who? M from Lowe and Australia. Yes. Iconic. Period. Period.

Period. Period. Period. Period. I love that you know Love Island. And you know The Bachelor, right? Yes, I do Arden's podcast with The Bachelor, which I had never watched until I did that. So like, I feel like, but here's the thing. Love Island makes the Bachelor. No offense, Bachelor people. It makes it look. Here's what Love Island gets right. Yes. And Bachelor gets wrong. Yes. You come in, they understand that the initial attraction is everything. And so they come in basically naked.

They come in shirtless in a bikini and there's seven and seven or however many and they're equal and they couple up and then it's just like Do you like each other? Throw them in a blender. Yeah. The whole like fake dating going on a one-on-one to the grove is it's just not. Yeah, no one's like, yeah, no one believes this is going to lead to a hot marriage. No. Or it's like at least in Love Island, you're like lots of people are probably going to fuck.

Totally. Yeah. It's, oh my God. Which could lead to making a family. And dude, Love Island Australia is the only franchise with a consent button. And that's awesome. That is. They have.

We were watching it. And I was like, they reach up and they turn. To be like, I want to fuck. Yeah. And it says your half a heart. Right. You get a half a heart. Half a heart.

And if you turn it on, it's like, we're fucking. Anything that happens here is consensual. And I went, I think that's a consent. I think everyone should have that. And it is. It's crazy. It is a crazy thing. Yes, but it's also crazy to know that you're in a big room of all of your friends.

And if there is a light above your friend's bed, it means they're getting some. They're getting it. Consensually. Consensually. It means they're consensually getting it. It is wild. I mean, the first season of Love Island, UK, they fuck on top of the sheets because a girl says, they can't shout if it on top of the sheets.

Yes, they do. Nice one. Would you rather get it on or get it on with consent? Oh, my God, such a hard one. That's difficult. That's real tricky Well, do I Do I get a light above my bed?

Sure And yeah, of course And of course As long as there's the light I just like lights I just like night light guys I just like light I'll slam our cross

Like a moth Guys, let's just be real None of us will ever have sex We have lightning McQueen crocs That light up Guys do you want to make a pact To never have sex ever Yes!

Because none of us ever have And none of us ever will Can I just say finally? Yeah Hands in everyone On the count of three No sex ever. One, two, three.

No sex ever. Freeze frame.