Syd & Olivia Talk Sh*t - Miles Bonsignore Is The PERFECT PERSON!

Episode Date: July 29, 2025

Perfect Person Miles Bonsignore is on the big bad podcast for you today! Sponsored by Cornbread Hemp! Right now, Syd and Olivia Talk Sh*t listeners can save 30% on their first order! Just head to https://cornbreadhemp.com/TALK and use code TALK at checkout. Remember these episodes now go up a few days early AND with bonus content on Patreon! https://www.patreon.com/c/syd_and_olivia Listen to the show on the go! Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/2j0iQxY9Pf0h4mXEOFxgmk?si=a95ba3e2a2844ec4 Chapters This is a 7equis Network Show Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Here's my theory. I think they're Christmas. What? Sorry, you said the city and I feel like I had aneurysm. What? Welcome to the big bad podcast for you. Welcome to sit and Olivia talk shit. I'm the Sid one. I'm the Olivia one.

Today we have a very special other one. Oh my God. It's so exciting, you guys. Might I say the perfect person? Oh. Oh my. Oh, God. It's Miles.

Hi guys. Thank you. Thank you so much for having me. I'm so excited to be here. Oh my gosh. You host Perfect Person. Yeah, you know it. We were on your show. You did. He came on. Wonderful. We had such a fun time. You guys are the greatest. You're the greatest. It was so fun. And here's the thing is I need to tell you something. I need to admit to something immediately. No way. Right off the bat. You're coming clean about something. I need to come clean because I'm doing confessions. Here's a segment called confessions. Confessions. Music. Cut to music. Okay. Now, boom. Before we do my confession, Olivia, do you mind being, what's the wall in between the priest and the guy? Confessional wall? Yeah, I'll come in. So, sorry, you're the, so there's a wall in between us.

And you're confessing, and I'm the priest in this? Yeah, you're not going to be in a priest. I've never done this before because Judaism, but I'm excited. So you have to say, forgive me daddy. Forgive me, daddy, but I made poopie. Oh, no. Let me clean that poopie right up. Oh, God, this feels sexual.

Sorry. It's confession of... Oh my God, this wall is talking. By the way. Yeah, wow. Predator. Okay, so the wall is a predator. Okay, forgive me, Daddy.

But I made boo-boo. Go for it, baby. So I was on your podcast father. Yes, my child. You have this really cool sound system thing. Yeah. And I was like, that's fucking sick. I'm going to directly copy it.

Of course. But you mean my... Are you talking about my roadcaster version two? Yeah. So I have a... the same thing except it's $5 from Amazon. Oh, you mean my soundboard and I see. So you got your own soundboard, but it's just sort of a little tiny device. Yes. That was the quietest gunshot I've ever and it kind of is sick in that it sucks. Yeah. And I love it so much, but I just fully copied it

from you and I just wanted to confess that. Honestly, look, I'm honored and copying I find as a compliment, like in high school. Yes. Copying is a compliment in high school. Whenever somebody copies off your papers, say thank you. That's a compliment. Say thank you very much. Great artist, steal. Can the wall confess something? Yeah, go for it, Queen. I'm a predator. No. Yay. Oh, no. Terrible. Well, look, I got to be honest, soundball, I think more podcasts should have soundboards. Yes, they're so funny. I'm kind of clarify that I, Olivia, I'm not a predator. It was just the wall. It was the character you were playing. It was the character of the wall in the confession booth. We're just fully committed to that. And I think that's important. I'm not. Very important. So that's good. So you played a very quiet gunshot on your thing. What's your favorite soundbox on there? What's your favorite sound button? Probably this one. It's like a bunch of pots and pans falling down the stairs. That's sort of for essential workers during COVID. Yeah. And there's like. Banging pots of pants. Yeah. Some of them are too long. Some of them are just kind of weird. Like this one. It's awesome. Oh, that's a cat call. You could just sort of do that outside. So she did. I did. By accident. I have it in my bag a lot of the times.

And so it'll be like rustled around and will accidentally I'll be in a like dark parking lot with only one other woman walking. And accidentally it'll be like. Oh. And they'll look. And I'll look and I'll be like, I don't know. I didn't do it. You can see my mouth. My mouth can't do that.

Watch. So that's kind of my thing. That's incredible. Watch me try. Um, so anyway, you're the perfect person. How does that feel? Feels really, really nice. It's good.

I mean, you know, sometimes I get it wrong, but that to me is perfect. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And when you made your show, you were like, I should probably share my gifts with the world, right? Well, I figured I'm sort of a guy who knows some stuff. And I also feel that I'm just good at talking to people. You are. You are. You're wonderful at it.

Thank you for saying that. And also it keeps it fresh for me. It means I can do the show, like, even if I'm feeling like, oh, I'm feeling down or, like, lazy or whatever. Just the idea that new fresh people will be on the phone. Yeah, and like everyone is, you get the prompts built in. All you have to do is ris up the strangers. All I have to do is riz. All you have to do is riz.

All you got to do is riz. All you got to do is riz. Hey, you guys, that song reminds me of another really perfect song. Please. Which is also a perfect segue. Oh. Oh, real segment. Our first real segment.

The last one was just real life, but this is a real segment. This is a segment we've done before. I don't even remember if you liked it or not. I loved it. But it's called Should This Exist Music! Cut it or else. This is a segment where we ask you if this thing should exist or not. And we all just talk about whether or not it should exist.

And we got a couple different ones. I know which one you're starting with based on the intro. Yeah, I think that we should talk about the new Jojo Siwa song, Betty Davis-Eyes. It's always time to talk about the new Jojo Siwa song. Should that exist? I think, well, should we talk, I mean, the bigger question is should JoJo Siwa exist? Huge. Huge question.

Which I think is a much larger question, but maybe a more important one. So we've been, we've been obsessed with the concept of Jojo Siwa for years. Of course. A huge fan of the concept. Since, since she was giving out asbestos and toys. Did she give asbestos toys out? Yes. Oh.

Or bows. She was giving out bows and all of them had asbestos. And all these kids were like, what the fuck? And then, yeah, and she had asbestos bows. Now she now is Tradwife Yeah I saw her do Betty Davis eyes I've just seen the clip where she says Betty Davis Oh you gotta see the whole song

Now if I were if I were five years old How would you describe to me And again like this is me knowing a lot of stuff About a lot of stuff Describe to me who Betty Davis is And why we're talking about her now Betty Davis is an old timey actress question mark Right

Okay and I can explain who Jojo CY is to a five year old Okay because I know Jojo But I would like to hear your explanation JoJo Siwa is an alien who's been raised in culture but not directly. Yeah. You know, so Jojo Siwa never had any type of normalcy. No. Yes?

She's 5'10. She's 5.10. She's very tall. I got to be honest, that felt irrelevant. It's the first thing we became obsessed with. It's the first thing we became obsessive. To raise your hand, to add, just a fun fact. She's 5.10.

That's not a fun fact, a very important fact. She's 5.10. She's almost tall. When she had the side pony tail still and she was 510, that's when we were like, this is everything. Like, being that tall and having a side ponytail and your face on your car is huge. Is she still have the face on the car? I don't know.

I don't know. But she has to update the face because she's had so many different iterations of her brand now. She's had so many different eras. She's had so many different eras. So she has to update it to Betty Davis face. So the thing with Betty Davis eyes is that... Apparently it was... So this was a song and she's covering the song.

And the original song does not sound that much different. It doesn't. It really does not. Have you heard the original sign? Did you know of them? Never not once. No, me neither. I also, if I'm correct me if I'm wrong,

but recently Jojo Siwa was in hot water because Jojo Siwa, she obviously came out a couple years ago and was like, I'm a cool young, gay now and everyone was sort of cheering for that but also being like you maybe don't have the capacity to make art and be a representation of queer culture well she was like I'm the first gay pop yeah exactly right she said I'm making gay music in a way that no one has made it and everyone was like I've created the genre of gay pop and every person in the world was like hmm and the thing is I look at it and I just go like yeah you've never had a fucking chance to experience anything normal how

it's like bring me yeah it's like it's like it's It's like Britney Spears. Yes. But, yes, it is, there is an element where it is like, she is so young and has been so sheltered. And also so over inundated with shit the whole time. Like, she's always had to be a brand. And she was a child. She just has no idea that a gay person has ever done pop.

She might not know. Yeah. She might not know that the gay is pretty much created pop. Exactly. Right. That is for a very long time. So then she was on a reality show. She did on her girlfriend with a man.

With the man from Love Island that Sid and I were also obsessed with years ago. Correct. And then now is maybe not with her girlfriend anymore. Then she comes out with this song that is so tradwife. She's with Crystal. Oh, she is now with that guy. She's actively with Chris. Okay, got it.

Yes. Effective immediately, she is with Chris. Yeah. Yeah. Got it. And then this song comes out. And the problem is, yeah, everyone's going like, she rescinded her lesbianism.

She's a trad wife now. I don't know. Maybe she's just doing a retro thing. I think she's still a biqueen. Yeah. I think that she obviously is doing a very weird choice of, you know what it is? You know when Lady Gaga was like, obviously, I make amazing music? And then I'm going to sing with Tony Bennett.

Yes. She's trying to do that with none of the cultural, like, expertise or none of the, like, body of work. Right. Yes. It is, like, too early for this. Yeah, way too early. Yes. She needed to build up the brand for a little bit and then do something kind of different.

But instead, she was like, I'm going to make this move pretty quick. And I also think the song is bad. And that's sort of a different point. Okay. You don't like the song. Well, I'd like to hear it. Yeah, we can hear it. Yeah, we can hear it.

She slows you when she snows you off her feeding with her crumbs. She throws you. She's ferocious. And she knows just what it takes to make my problem. All the boys think she's a spy. She's a spy. She's got. And I have a couple notes.

Okay, here's what we'll do because we obviously can't play the song. Can we show the image? We can show the image and I'll do a cover of the cover of the song. And we'll put that in. And we'll have that. That's really good. It's really good. We'll have that be in SIDSBops.

We'll have that be in SIDSB. Available on the Patreon. Check out the Patreon. Yeah, check out the Patreon. Yeah, check out the P. What? What? Check out my Pee.

Yeah, check out my Pee. Check out the Patreon. Check out. Big Pee. Check out. The Pee. Check out the Pee. Sign up for that. My other note about this specific shot is it looks like, okay, I'm, I'm a father.

I just want to remind you. I am a father. You just shot in a baby. You just charted a baby out. I started a baby myself. I started a baby myself. I did have a second. There we go. And I want to say that they clearly got a steady cam and then sort of moved.

Somebody just went like this. Yeah. And they lingered on the shot. And that's my other note about it. Okay. Okay. You don't love that. Well, we can just say, we don't even have to play this sound.

But I just want you guys to see how sort of she's, you can see her that they got. this puppy on it. And so there we are to the right and we're going to the left. And then we're going to go to the right again. And then we're going to go to the left again. And it's sort of that's the whole shot. Yeah, maybe the person was just drunk. It may be. I mean, if I was working with Joe Josiewa, I'd be drunk as hell. I worked with her once. You did? I did. What? And did you love it? What did you do? I was, I do this thing sometimes where I, I'm the trophy girl for the kids and family Emmys. And she was hosting one of the nights. And so I was like her right hand man for like a night and she was lovely to me. You were her right hand arm man. I was her everything. I was for

everything. I was her silly rabbit. Well she she was nice. That's really cool. She was super nice to me and she was nice to all the kids she was teaching how to dance but but also yeah yeah she she was very tall. She doesn't seem like her problem is that she's a mean celebrity. No not at all. No her problem is that she's been raised in an egg yes and that's not even her fault. It's not. No, it's not. No, it's not. And so anything, I think I do think that we need to re-contextualize all of the JoJo Siwa criticism to criticizing her team and her mom. Oh, yeah. And the people who raised her and put her in the, because she's the dance mom's team. And the dance mom's team, 100%.

And she's like, how much money do we think she has? Oh, I will never ever know. Because, you know, there's people in real life who think that when you Google someone's net worth, that's accurate. No, that's in a group. And that's like the craziest. Yeah, no, it's not. But I just didn't think about the. bows of it all that she was the number one child entertainer for like four and a half, five years

and the selling. Oh my God. She had to have a cougan. But I feel that she probably has very wealthy or her mom is very wealthy. Yeah. I know that's a lot of money. She's definitely made a lot of money. Totally.

And the question is. Money off of Jojo Siwa. Is it Jojo Siwa? We hope so. We hope so. She probably sold millions of bows and those bows, let's say they're 1099. And they probably would be with the asbest. With these best is exactly.

Yes, she costs extra. But I just am like, what a fascinating to be this type of, you know, 20 million. I think it's more than that. I got to be honest. I think it's way more than that. Just the merchandise alone, they're printing bows from some, you know, random place for a penny a bow. And they're selling them for. I don't know if she still has it.

She had a dance studio in Burbank. She does. I pass it every day when I drive. When I drive here. We got to go. She still has it. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. I pass it all the time. Studio CWW. Studio CW. I pass it when I'm driving here. Wow. We should all go do it.

class at students. I literally, you know I would. Wait, maybe that's what our, because the best part is I can't dance for shit. So it would be great. I did modern dance all through middle school all over high school. You would crush that. Middle school modern.

And I choreographed my senior year. Wait, wait, wait, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. You choreographed your senior year of high school, like the whole year. No, I, well, I choreographed to dance. Gone, I got it. Okay, I was so confused. I choreographed my walk, my senior year of high school. I choreographed everyone's classes and I choreographed.

No, I choreographed, yeah, I choreographed. The studio of Siwa merch is pretty awesome. I kind of want some of this is kind of fire though. Yeah. Yeah. So do you think that song should exist? No. Okay.

All right. I do. But I'm glad it does. Yeah. That's fair. That's fair. Yeah. I don't think it should, but I'm glad it should.

But I'm glad that I'm glad that there's things out there that are not something that I wouldn't think of. Yes. And there need to be things out there that we don't enjoy. Exactly. She seems happy with Chris. And you know what? The world is devastating.

So I'll take anyone being a little bit happy. Yeah. I'll think JoC. was happiness over anything else. Here's another thing because it's like I didn't even think I liked the song, but it's been stuck in all of my dreams. Oh my God, I can't stop singing it. I can't stop singing it. Yeah, yeah. It's stuck. So I'm kind of like stop. Yeah, I guess I like it. She thinks I'm a spy. She thinks I'm a spy. And listen, I love the concept of anyone thinking I'm a spy because spies are hot. I just want to say I've spilled coffee all over this table. Okay, that's okay,

because I spilled coffee all over the entire kitchen. Good. Yeah. Yeah. It's perfect. We're on the same page then. So life's been a little crazy lately. Whatever could you mean? And something that helps me unwind are cornbread hemp CBD gummies. Oh my God, that's so crazy because literally same. Yeah. When do you find is the best time to have a CBD gummy? Oh, I love having a CBD gummy when all of the things I'm allowed to do when the workday are over, but I still think of more things I need to do and can't do.

You just need to quiet your mind a little relax. Yep. It's really good to have like when you're about to watch a bunch of TV and just chill. Yeah. Just a good laydown moment. Yeah. Cornbread hemp CBD gummies are formulated to make you feel better, whether it's stress or discomfort or just needing a little relaxation. You've always said that. I always say that. And you know they only use the best part of the hemp plant, which is the flower, as we always say, as we always say. For the purest and most potent CBD. It's specifically formulated to help relieve discomfort, stress, and sleeplessness. And all products are third-party lab tested and USDA organic, which, which is specifically formulated to help relieve discomfort, stress, and sleeplessness. And all products are third-party lab tested and USDA organic, which, which, which, is awesome. That's lovely. Right now, Sid and Olivia Talk Shit listeners can save 30% on their first order. Just head to cornbreadhemp.com slash talk and use code talk at checkout. That's cornbreadhemp.com

slash talk and use code talk at checkout. Next one on should this exist, Chuckie Cheese for adults. Okay, so I know this is new and just came out. I have been to Chuckie Cheese. Multiple times as an adult. Not to turkey cheese for adults. Well, they have, first of all, any chocolate cheese is a chocolate cheese for adults. You don't have to have a kid there. You can order beer.

In fact, I made a video recently where we went to watch Helen Haney move that thing. And you can get beer there at any time of day. Wait, really? Oh, yes. You're a father. I made a video. Let's bolt the clip.

No, just kidding. Your father, you didn't bring your kids? Which I should have. Although he was too young to even appreciate or understand. To appreciate Helen Hennie's thing? No, Helen Hennie is a beautiful duck or chicken or whatever. and she moved that thing. One of the last animatronic,

I think there's like only seven or eight animatronic Chuckie Cheeses left. Are they all in California? No. One of them is in Riverside. Okay, we got to go. I got it. I got it.

I went, saw Helen Hennie move that thing. How was that thing? It was incredible, honestly. Did it go bounce, bounce, it went bounce, Helen Hennie sort of, it's Helen Hennie's champagne room. She brought us back for a special dance. Oh, you got a lap dance.

We got a lapidance. We did tuck a little dollar bill into Helen Hennie's. Wait, can I see what this thing looks like, Helen Hennie? This thing. Search Helen Henny animatronic and you're going to see that thing. I'm excited to see that thing. Because Helen Henny to me is, she's what, she's Chuckie's counterpart. Right. Oh, shit. No, that's too modern. See, that's the modern. Wait, wait. Can we go down for that one? Wait, can we see the

haunted? Yeah. That looks like a five nights at Freddy thing. But that is closer to what Helen Hennie actually looks like. Oh, so you're attracted to that. No, I want. So Helen Hennie animatronic. No, no, no. Helen Hennie animatronic hot. Mel and Hiles, you're attracted to that. No, that is a weird thing that's happening. Helen Hennie, animatronic hot. No images. No images available. No images available. There we go. Okay.

Down there. How is this is just as bad. Not that one. To the right, to the right. That one? So this is Helen Hanny. Oh my God. That's just as bad.

No, she's original. She's beautiful. And she's a little cheerleader. I'm going to be honest. I want to see her drop that thing. Oh, I think that I found myself with cheerleader, but it's Helen. Do you ask your wife for? a threesome with Helen Henney. Is that your best? I have my way for permission to go to Helen Henney's

Shag paper. Can I please? She was like, oh my God. Oh my God. Look at her. Look at her. moving that thing. Her thing isn't even... Her thing is her thing is her thing. Sorry, this is... She doesn't have a thing. Okay, because I was going to say her thing is just a wooden plate. No, she's wearing little boots and she's wearing knee pads. Oh my God. Wait, what is she's... That is kinky. I know. I'm shit. But she doesn't have knees, though. No, not in this one. Not in the one. She does have. She She does have a thing. Oh my God. And knee pads. I'm telling you, man. Because she's a freak. But Chuck E. It already is for adults, I think.

It already is for adults. So I'm curious. Like, I think it will fail if it is just marketed to it. Yeah, there we go. See, she's wearing knee pads. He's not going to show you. Isn't that just Dave and Busters,

but without the animatronics? Exactly. Like, the thing it would need is the animatronics. Oh my God. You guys, this is the scariest video I've ever seen. No. She's Lennie, dude. She's so hot.

She's not. Look at her. She's so not. Is she foaming at the mouth? She's so scary. She's freaking. No, you guys, this is scary because Chuckie's a person over there and she's a robot. And he's like touching her like, he's like, this, my bitch.

I'm going to be honest. I'm going to be completely honest if Helen Henny isn't in the next season of Love Island. Yeah. I'm going to end it. Helen would be really good. Helen Henney's weird fucking eyes that just kind of like, they blink one at a time. She's got Betty Davis eyes. She's got Betty Davis eyes.

We should make Betty Davis eyes. Helen. Helen Henney eyes. Oh my God, a picture of Helen Henny that says she's got Betty Dave. I do think she's a spy. I do think that's a spy. That's absolutely correct. And she's a robot.

If you want to watch me go to tip Helen Henny a five, you can watch it on my YouTube channel. Oh, you know that I will. Please do it. Oh, you know that I will. That's exciting. It's on there. Recent bit. So you think it's going to fail.

I think that the problem with Chucky Cheese for adults is that it already serves beer. It already is a plate. You do you serve beer? Oh, yeah. We tricked a Chucky Cheese once. What you mean? Scammed to Chuck Cheese once. Scammed? Do you scammed the point system?

We scammed a Chuckie cheese for sure. What happened? We just got, we were, oh my God. Don't show me images like this and expect me not to come. Oh my God. Oh no, I have to get up as the confessional wall again because he's a predator. Holy shit. That is, um, oh my God.

This is like, you know the trailer for the or the poster for the Allison Bree Dave Franco movie where their eyes are next to each other? It looks exactly like that. Except with Helen Hennie and Chuck E. And this is more original because they stole that movie. Right. This is more original. She looks really devious in this. She looks like she drank poison and she's going to poison.

Yeah. She looked like she's doing a murder suicide and she's just hit the suicide part. Exactly. She's excited for the murder. Yeah, yeah. Which is not the order you're not supposed to kill you. Helen Hennie did murder suicide backwards. She did suicide murder.

How embarrassing. Oh my God. Oh my God. How many. She, yeah, she's, um, I mean, she's a little tramp this woman. She is, dude. Do we still say that? Do we still say tramp?

For her, yeah. You canceled. For her. You canceled. You canceled. Ah, you canceled. There's that Italian. There's my Italian nerd that's coming out.

But do I think the Chuck Echise for adults should exist? Yeah. I think I'm curious to like see the inevitable lawsuits that come out of it. Yeah. Because people are going to fight at Chuck E cheese. Oh, I thought you were going to say, fuck. I do think people are going to fuck. Oh, people should fight and fuck.

That's the only way to keep it going. See, what's it going to, what's the like hook? Is it the games? Fuck fight and fuck. Fuck fight and fuck. Fight and fuck. Fuck fight and fuck. The fuck rooms, fight rooms and fuck rooms.

That would be kind of awesome. Yeah. Now, I guess I'm wondering, yeah, it'll be a D&B's buck Chucky cheese name. You can fight Chuckie and you can fuck. Hennie. The problem with David Bussers is there's no mascot. And I've always said that. That's true.

So I think that it'll be kind of nice. No, here's the thing that I love about Chuck E Cheese. I'm so excited that adults are finally allowed to enjoy it. Well, because I thought we weren't even allowed in that one time without kids. We weren't. And maybe that's a new policy. And we were in college. That might be a new policy.

But when I nannied, I would always say to the kid, like, should we go to checky cheeses? Because you wanted to go. And he'd be like, I'm a little old for that. And I'd be like, let's go as a joke. That's funny. And then we would go. But the thing that's so excellent about checking cheese is, and not enough people talk about this. And maybe you can find out if you order from their ghost kitchen on DoorDash, which they do have.

You can do that. Yes, they have a ghost kitchen, and it's either on, like, Uber Eats or DoorDash or grub. Is it called Chuckie Cheese? It's not. It's a ghost kitchen, so it's called, like, mouse pizza or something. It's not called that. It's like Halloween costumes being off brand. Yes.

It's like, there is, like, a ghost kitchen, and it is just Chuckie Cheese on, like, food apps. And then you get your food and you're like, this is a Chuckie cheese pizza. But the thing that you'll find is if you get a cheese pizza, it does taste like pepperoni. Oh. For some reason, all of the cheese pizza at Chuckie cheese tastes exactly like pepperoni. And when I was a child and my mom would guilt me into not getting pepperoni because she was kosher. Yeah. I would just order the cheese pizza from Chucky Cheese and be like, now that's pepperoni.

That's so funny. And that's a really good hack for all you kids who are trying not to disappoint your kosher moms. So it's Pesqually. Well, Pesqually's pizza, obviously Pesquale is Chucky Cheese's chef friend. Yes, Pusquale's pizza is the ghost kitchen. That's so weird. That is so weird. So if you order from there and you just think, oh, it's just like.

a pizza place. It's not. And if you tell Chuck E. Cheese that you're doing a short film about a girl who's always wanted to go to Chuckie Cheese, they'll let you come in and film an actual scene about being a sugar baby at a Chuckie Cheese. That's amazing. Okay, you did scam a Chuckie Cheese. We told that we were like, it's about, like, yeah, we have to film this scene at this Chuckie Cheese. Do you think we could come in a little early? We're film students. And they were like, yeah, for sure. And they just, like, gave us cotton candy and let us, like, hang out. And we shot, like, a very inappropriate scene for our web series about being non-sexual sugar babies. But we did have a plan. which is if they were to come over. If they heard what we were saying. And they were like, wait, this isn't what you said. We were going to be like, this is the nightmare sequence. Yeah. Where everything is going wrong. You guys are too much planning.

Yeah. Did way too much planning. They did not ask anything. They were like, they were like, man, fucking. Then we'll pull out this fake business car. That is literally like, I'll stay up all night being like, okay, in an in a situation where something happened that I didn't expect. Oh, yeah.

How could I be have a backup? Of course. You always need a plan. In the car, think of scenarios and then out loud, pretend I'm, I actually shouldn't say this. No, but I get it. It's probably very relatable. I shouldn't say this because truly I sound like a fucking nutcase.

You think you're going to top anything I say as a nutcase. You'll say out loud in the car your excuses. I'm a professional fucking nutcase. I'll sit in the car and I'll think of a scenario where I'll be like, what if this happened? What if my grandma confronted me about blah, blah, blah, blah. And I'll make something. And then out loud I'll be like, I'm sorry.

I just can't. I thought. And I'm like in the car and people are like parked next to me. And I'm like saying out loud an imaginary scenario. And I'm playing make believe with myself about nothing. That is very normal, unfortunately. I've actually done this as well where I will fantasize about a situation where I have to stand up for somebody. Oh, nice, nice.

You know what I mean? You'll be like, because I don't, like, real life and real people don't really have a lot of serious confrontation. So sometimes I'll be like, well, if they said that, I'd be like, you better get away from my family. If they said that, then I'd be like, well, you're not even a good friend. That's so good. Then I'll sort of invent a certain area because that would never happen in real life. In real life you'd be like I wasn't

you know, hey, I'm having this issue but you'd be like, oh my God, I'm sorry you're having this issue. People are pretty soft. Yeah. No, it's a, it's so funny. And it's never things that are like actual daydreams. It's never like if I were winning an award. No, no.

It's like day stress dreams. Yes, it's always like if my dad thought I was a horror. Yeah, what would I say? I would say, well, dad, then what you should be upset about. is. Raising a whole one. And it's like what? My friend Kurt once told me that he that he imagines

doing eulogies for his friends. Oh my God. When he's in the car, he'll be like He's also had to. Maybe that's why. This was before. No, this was before that. Wait, that's worse. In his car, he'll be like, what would I say about my good friend? And in a way, I think it's actually really sweet. I think about that with wedding speeches. I go like, what would I say at this person's wedding?

Yes, because you're remembering all the fondest things about this person who is actively in your life. And there is something actually really sweet about that. But it is funny to say out loud to be like, Olivia was beautiful person and then like driving up to your place. Yeah. Hey. Hey. How's it going?

Yeah. I go through the rolodex of, I'll like pick a person and I'll go or a situation like the bank or like the bank. Or like the bank is a famous situation. Yeah. It's a famous situation. And I'll go through a rolodex of all the things that that person or entity could be mad at me about. Oh, totally. The bank could be mad at you about?

Yeah. I'm just like, and then what if this happens? And then what if this happens? Or like, if it's it, I'm like, oh, my God, I wonder if this week I kind of seemed out of it at some point. And she maybe was, like, annoyed by that and didn't show it and was, like, feeling it. And I need to apologize. But I don't know which part I need to apologize. Like, and it's just that on a loop.

And then eventually I, what? Don't do that. Oh, I wish I didn't. Don't do that. I wish I didn't. I didn't. I know it's not real. I had a fantasy recently.

It was like, we were moving and I, we moved to this new place. They were trying to sell the place, like the apartment building we were living in or something. It was a duplex. They're trying to sell that. So while they're trying to sell it, we're like, okay, we're moving out, like unrelated to that. But then I was like, I hope we get her security deposit back. And then in my mind, I'm like, oh, my God. If she doesn't give me a security deposit back, I'm going to show up to the open house.

and I'm going to be like, where's my fucking money? Oh, my wife. She's like, no, you wouldn't do that. And I was like, no, I would. If she even dared to take away, we did all the, we cleaned it, we patched the holes in the wall. I would go to this open house and I'd say, well, well, well. I was like, really buttering myself up for days.

And then it's like, we got her security device. It's like totally fine. Everything was totally fine. She was really nice. That's so funny. Yeah. So, in conclusion, Chuck EGee's for adults. Yes or no?

I'm going to say yes because I want. want more chaos in the world. Okay, great. Good. Joy is good. Yeah, I'm going to say, while I can't explain why my answer is yes. Correct. The answer is yes. My answer is yes because I, any opportunity for adults in a ball pit, I'm down. Yeah, I know. I mean, we went to a ball pit in New York and it was like the highlight of the whole trip. We went to, did you dive so low that you couldn't even see the top? Well, we sunk very slowly and children jumped on us. Really? Children? Oh, this was like a child ballpark. Well, it was in a museum. It was in a museum that there was a networking event. We went for a networking event. And then we got there and we were like, what is this bulb? And it was an interactive

museum with like crazy art installation. Have you ever been to the balloon museum? No, but I feel like I should now. Guys, if you're in Los Angeles and you're looking for a fun afternoon, take hallucinogens and go to the Blue Museum. I didn't do this because I went with my children, but they loved it. The Blue Museum has a giant, there's this ball pit. It is massive and it's these like black balls. It's this beautiful art installation from the Balloon Museum. It's so sick. Dude, tickets are kind of expensive but it is really cool.

Oh my God. So you can play in that. Wait. I wanted that so bad. There needs to be like a camber app for like things to do like high. Yes.

Like things in Los Angeles that are excellent to do if you're high or drunk and it needs to be its own app. There were people tweaking. There's like a room where there's like wind blowing like a tornado and there's all these white balloons.

So you stand and it's just balloons blowing. It's so great. Yeah. Great for kids but also just good for it. And I like that those balloons. And I like that those balloons look like sperm. Yeah, and they should. More balloons should look like sperm. It's a good place to just feel like it'll feel like your life. Yeah, you're going to be like my life

is beautiful. My prom dress had a sperm on. Yeah, since prom dress was sperm themed, it was beautiful. What? Wait, why? My, um, I got a prom dress. We had in a high school, we had like a Facebook group that was like, post your prom dress and let's see if any of us are wearing the same one so that we don't do that. Right. And I was like, no one's going to get my prom dress. I like got this random prom dress from Windsor. It's like, of course someone's going to get that. Yeah. And some girl posted on the thing. I'm like, this is my prom dress. And I was like, well, you beat me to it. And that is my prom dress. So now I can't wear that. And so my mom was like, well, I have plenty of dresses. Plenty of dresses you can wear. And I was like, okay, mom. And she was like, what about

this gorgeous dress and brought out a dress she got from a mall kiosk in Vegas that had, it was like a, it looked good on you. It was a black high neck dress with a bedazzled sperm on it. It was definitely the shape of a sperm. It can only be described. It was shaped like. sperm. Oh yeah. That's sperm. And I looked at it and I was like, I guess so. And that is what I wore to prom. It was iconic though. It honestly is like it is iconic. You're saying, hey guys, look at me. Hey guys, look at me. I'm a senior and I could only get a freshman friend to come with me. My prom dress was a thing I had used for an improv long form show where I played an alcoholic 40-year-old drama teacher who was trying to be in. It was a good dress.

romantic lead productions with all of the students. That's like my character. And then I was like, I'm just going to keep this dress for prom because it's red and I like red. Red's good. Red and it's color on you. Easy to not buy another one. Yes. I didn't give a fuck.

I love to not buy another one. I love to not buy another one. You have one other thing about should that exist or not. I don't know what it is. Yeah, I have one more thing. And I think the answer is pretty clear. It just popped up on me algorithm last night. And I was like, well, we got to bring this up.

Should this exist? We all know. answer, but it is affair coaches. What? No fucking way. There are coaches for having a good affair. Yes. So this woman is going to hell. Yeah, 100%. This is an affair coach that always pops up on my, because I always see people like, why is you always popping up on your feed? Okay, so yeah, I know, because I'm always looking about how to have a good affair. No, like, so I get, I have this problem with my algorithm where I follow people who rip on other people who are bad. Sure. So I see, a lot of bad people through that because I'll see

some stitch where someone's like what the actual fuck is this and this is a woman I see stitched a lot why don't we go down to some of her reels we need a reel I cannot believe this she has a story highlight for clients does that mean she's showing people's success stories because that's kind of ruining the affair

isn't it so yeah let's watch a little secret oh these stories reflect the real journeys of people If you're in an affair and struggling, please know you don't have to figure out alone. What? Wait, can we see some of her videos where she like talk, like does like little like that? If you're an affair and struggling, that shit. Get the fuck out.

What are you talking about? Don't be in an affair. Your scandal doesn't define you. It refines you. Yes, maybe, yeah, click any of these because they're all just like maybe that one. This is actually really good for you to know for when you had the affair with the duck. Guys, this is. This is fucked up, guys.

I fell in love with someone. What the fuck, dude? Why did you leave your first marriage? He wanted it comfortable. I wanted insane. He wanted a good wife. I fell in love with someone else. Ew, this guy.

Chasing myself. Ew. All of me changed. And then like, look, it's not about leaving a person. It's about leaving a version of yourself behind. It's like, break up with them. Break up with them.

Oh, sorry, use basic communication skills to say that you want to leave your relationship. There's ones where she does like little dances and points. And it's like, this is what your husband was saying to me during your marriage. And it's like really, it's, yeah, I don't regret my affair. Cool. That's so. Partner taught me so. Ew. It's not about you, you dumb bitch. What's the fuck? My affair partner. He taught me I was really of respect and love. He told me my opinion, but you're not respecting someone else. Break up with them. People will do everything except for have a small conversation.

Oh, it's so true. That's insane. That it wasn't just tolerated, but enjoyed and savored. And like, he had a wife too. Okay, but it's also like, are these people not remembering that part of the thing that is exciting about an affair is that you're having an affair. So these people might not be teaching you that you might just be like, whoa, you're just, your hormones are shooting out your ears because you feel like, I'm not supposed to do this and I'm fucking. You're just feeling a crazy amount of dopamine because you're being a villain. Yes. And the second that you're with them in a normal relationship, you'll be like, oh, this is just a normal relationship. I also wonder like, how do these people not after something of this happens? How are they not so worried reasonably so that that person's then going to cheat on them with someone? They will.

Of course. They will. They absolutely will. So anyway, this woman is, she's an affair coach, and I would recommend just looking through her videos in general because they are so, I'll never forget what my affair partner did when his wife caught him cheating on her because I told his wife everything. I thought the truth would set me free. But what happened next took me to my core. The truth is I felt terrible for what I'd done. I didn't feel free. I felt guilty and ashamed. Good. Good. You should feel that way. I called him to say, I'm sorry. He answered and I felt a tinge of hope. I quietly said his name. This is so fucked up. The air stood still, he whispered, never call me again. It hit hard. The one thing he said he'd never do. Then, silence. Oh my God, dude. I couldn't breathe.

My whole world went dark. I knew I'd never see him again. And worse, he hated me now. I hated myself. A year went by. His word still echoed. I went to therapy. I started to heal.

What? Five years past. Like, crazy. There's a thing on the internet that is like, basically you can find community for anything. Yeah. Which is like, fine, right? But people will find community for like their mouth. And it's so fucking wrong.

It's like, you're just being able to be like, whatever, I'm not a bad person because I like stole and I punched someone. Yeah. And it's like, yeah, maybe you don't do that though, right? If you don't want to be a bad person, do that less.

Yeah. It's so crazy. It's definitely a thing of like, if someone is like, well, if I have the numbers behind me, I must not be that bad. Yeah.

You just have other bad people. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. Right. People are like looking to validate their own. Yeah. They're like, I could have never made a mistake.

Yeah, it's like, all these, they did wrong. That wasn't, right? These fucking MAGA people reading English-translated versions of Hitler speeches for the first time and being like, actually, I think people were kind of hard on him. Yeah, it's like, no, that answer here is that you are bad if you agree with him. The answer is, you are bad. The answer is, oh, shit, I agree with this. I need to figure out why I'm so bad. Yeah.

Yeah. It's pretty clear there, my friend. Oh, my God. So, yeah, we could all. Oh, she has a podcast. To have a podcast. She has a podcast. She has merch.

And free researches for the betrayed spouse. Fuck off. Sorry, what I meant was fuck off. Free resources for the betrayed spouse. A compassionate resource from the other woman in the wife. If your spouse this when you cheat on that. Hard no. Hard no.

Yeah. So she's an affair coach. So anyway, had an affair for two years. Hey. Here's some resources. Here's what I think. Here's a pamphlet, a PDF. This is a PDF.

But you have to give me back the iPad. I'd love that. I do think it would be really. I can't even let you. I don't know how to do that. I do think it would be really funny if we did eventually a fake. coaching with her. Like if we made enough money to buy a coaching. Well, I don't want to give her money, I guess. I would like, I would like her to use her energy. I'd like to buy her merch and return it. Yeah. And then get a

Oh my God. That's kind of sick back is her merch. That's like such an anti-of-ax or something. Redefining loyalty. Crave-Hines think for themselves. Yeah. The stupidest thing. It's crazy. Um, your scan. This is complicated people have the best stories. The best stories. Yeah, but sometimes they're also the worst stories. That's some tumbler shit. It's complicated people. What do you mean? You cheated on your husband. That's not the best story.

That's not a good story at all. That story is tale is oldest time. What are you talking about? It's the oldest thing that people do. It's not new and it's bad. Yeah. This is not an interesting story. This is a thing that happens all the time and we've all agreed we don't like.

Yeah. Redefining loyalty. One truth at a time. What? What does that mean? Redefining loyalty? What are you talking about? Imagine cheating on your spouse and then wearing this shirt.

How fucking disrespectful. Oh my God. Redefining loyalty one truth at a time. this shirt to tell your spouse you've been cheating on them. Come with, get ready with me while I go and tell my spouse. Oh my God. Get ready with me. Yeah.

So first I'll be putting on this shirt. It says redefining loyalty because I'm going to redefine loyalty to beat mean, not loyal. I was going to say that this is a fire pick actually, but I do think that it's total AI. It's totally AI. I'm pretty sure I'm pretty sure it's even better. It makes the whole thing even better. So if you at home are worried sometimes that you, you're not doing good enough morally or that you might not be a good person.

Give yourself a break because this woman exists and people pay her to coach them through having a successful affair. And you can't too. This podcast is sponsored by the other woman and the wife. Yeah. And also it's the O in the wife. The other woman. Yeah, the O W.

Wow. The other woman in the wife. Okay, so great. So also the other woman in the wife kind of sounds like a Los Angeles restaurant. I am going to say. saying no, this shouldn't exist. Yeah, I am going to agree. This should not exist.

Chelsea Smallwood should not exist. Yeah. Poor Chelsea Smallwood. I don't know what happened to you in life, but this is not it. This is not it. She girl boss. She girl boss. She grows to the sun.

She goes to the sun. She had an affair and went, okay, I'm going to go bossing. She said, this is a business. Okay. I know there's a business here. We're talking merch, book deals. Podcast. She goes to Shark Tank and goes, so I had an affair.

Okay, sharks. I'm looking for 30%. I'm looking for 30%. percent in a thousand dollars for me a fair oh my god um okay great what that absolutely yeah that's crazy it's so fucked up okay so uh miles you're um

moving on okay you're moving on is that okay what are you're moving on segments I'm moving on okay with me you guys raise my circadian rhythm so every so I feel that I'm on board I'm moving on now yeah right and I'm gonna take a minute you're still in the bad segment you're moving on to the next one I'm gonna regulate myself we're gonna do it at the same time.

Okay. If he's going to do the last segment, I'm going to do the new segment. Good. Good. This is a segment called the new is we're going to do advice. So because, okay, great, that was great. There's really, really nice stuff.

You are a person who is constantly giving people advice. I try. I try. Well, what can I say? I try. Pretty good at advice. And we think that, you know, you know who you don't give advice to? Oh, here we go.

People who don't ask for it. Wow. I would love to give advice to people who are nice to for it. And I think that that would be pretty fun. fucking sick. Yeah, it would be really, really good. So, um, we're going to go through some famous, uh, figures in pop culture. And I would give them some advice. Who have not asked for your advice. I would honestly, because sometimes those are the people they need most. Yeah. And we just think should you give them some advice? So the first person who has not asked for advice who you

Miles are going to give advice to me. Yeah. The New York City carpet man. This is something we just learned about because of a recent sketch we made. Olivia, do you want to explain it? Yeah. So the New York City carpet man is a guy who lays under a carpet in New York. City because he likes to be stepped on. And he claims it's not sexual, but there's also been a competing New York City carpet man who is also doing this. So that's him. So sorry, not very discreet.

Yeah. Not very hidden at all. Is that the guy? Yeah, I guess you know. Oh, yeah, there's a person inside this carpet and he wants to the same. Oh, okay, there we go. Oh, no. So, yeah.

So can you see the guy there? No, because he's covered by a carpet. So I would step on that, right? Yeah, I'd think to. Of course, you'd walk over. Oh, this guy's not being discreet. Kevin Carpet. That said his art is not a sexual fetish.

Oh, his last name is Carpet. Kevin Carpet. Okay, so Kevin Carpet is everything. So he's kind of just doing what. So we don't even know, actually, if he needs advice, but if you were to give him advice. Yeah, what's your advice to Kevin Carpet, the Carpet guy? My advice to give him carpet is, I think that he needs to not involve others in his kinks. Okay.

So that's beautiful. I do think that if he wants to be stepped on, there is certainly fetish organizations that you can just go to and be like, I'm going to be the carpet. I'll bring my own carpet to your fetish event and people can step on me when they walk in. I think that's excellent advice. That's amazing advice. Easy.

There's a hundred pre. Oh, my God. Getting character Kevin. That is so crazy. This man is in a like pile of carpet. It's not very discreet. I imagined it to be much more like it's a slow ramp and he's in the middle. But this is just like, no, he's.

There's a guy laying under a carpet. Yeah. Imagine a guy laying under a carpet. That's what it is. And there's going to be rats. Of course it's going to be rats. Which is kind of iconic. Of course.

Of course. I kind of right guy. I do think that that's the correct instinct. I think that, like, wanting to be stepped on is fucking sick as hell. I love that for that. And I actually love that. And what you can also do is you can get somebody who wants to step on you. And that's even more fucking thick. We get camea requests a lot from someone who absolutely has a step on me fetish.

Oh, really? And also a wedgy fetish. And they are always going like, can you roast my friend for getting the biggest wedgy? Or they'll be like, can you step on the camera like it's a bug? And we have to send a video back being like, we. We used to just... You have to. We used to reject the video.

And then... And then we were like, we'll take $30 or whatever. And so now we'll just send a video back being like, hey, we're not doing that. We don't sell that service. You seem great. I hope you find someone who sells that service.

There are a lot of people. We don't offer this service, but like fucking sick that you want it. Love your kink. Whatever your kink is. I love that for you. As long as you are only involving people who are also... So love it. Absolutely.

But the fact for him is there's a lot of people who like to step. There are so many people who love to step up to step up to the streets you remember? Oh my god. Oh my God. For example, step up to the streets. Okay. Here's someone who didn't ask for advice and you might want to give some advice to Dracula. Oh, big drag.

Yeah, big drag. Well, Dracula's been Cancelvania and I think that's about. Has he been Cancelvania? Well, you know. What happened? Well, he was grabbing women by the neck and suck of their blood. Oh, right. So he got Cancelvania.

That was like one of his main thing. Again, with Dracula, I think, again, it's not bad to have kinks. Yeah. As long as they're consenting. There's people that want to have their blood drunk also. Yeah. Maybe there's somebody that has a medical thing where they make too much blood. Yeah.

And their body just swells up. It goes like, oh, God, like a big balloon. Less blood in me. I have so much blood. Oi me blood, they say. Oi me blood, oh, me blood, blood. Yeah. Oi me blood, blood too much.

You know, so maybe Dracula could also. So similarly, involve people who are consenting. Involved consenting blooders. Yeah. How about Mario and Luigi? Mario and Luigi, I mean, I haven't played their newest venture. Mario Kart Switch 2. You haven't played Mario Kart?

No, I've played Mario Kart, but I haven't played Mario Kart Switch 2. Oh, okay. And I've not seen the Mario Brothers movie with Chris Pratt. I haven't either, but I did. I heard it was stinky. I heard it was stinky. I fucking don't even know what I watched. I heard it was bad.

But I am in love with Charlie Day, so that was the one thing. My advice for Mario Luigi is maybe like they should get girlfriends that, and I hate to victim blame. Right. Oh, okay. I see what you're going. I see where you're going. to victim blame. But I think they should get girlfriends that don't get stolen so often.

They are like fixers. Yeah. And I think that at some point Princess Peach is like maybe a little bit hooking up with Bowser. Yeah. Heard. I feel that she's like, oh my God. Oh no, I'm always over there. She also like if she's going to be captured by this beast like we know the story beauty and the beast and you might fall in love with her. Yeah, true. That's true.

And like she might just be like, oh yeah, actually Bowser's pretty fucking hot. And then Bowser might turn into a twink when they fall in love. And then she might be like, I don't know if I'm as attracted to this long-haired question is where's her dad and all of this? Is he locked away? In the basement? In the basement. Yeah.

And that was also my question is, who is Mario Luigi's mom slash dad? Oh. They don't have. Are they orphans? They're not because also if they're orphans, where are they extended? If they're orphans. Are they orphans? Are they orphans?

Are they orphans? Are they orphans? Are they orphans? My other question is, so Wario and Luigi, I've actually been thinking about this a lot recently, so I'm glad we were talking about it. Yeah. Are Wario and Waluigi they're cousins? Yeah, they're evil cousins.

Because I got to be honest, I think it's one of those things where someone's sister has a baby and it gets raised by the mom because Mario and Wario look a lot alike. And Waluigi and Luigi look a lot alike. Wait, I just had an idea. This might be a, yes, this might be actually a metaphor for nature versus nurture. Interesting. I was going to say, I think they're mobbed up and something happened in the family. Oh. Like the grandfather's got in a fight. Here's my theory. I think they're Christmas. What? I just, sorry, you said the city and I feel like I had aneurysm. What? I love that. Did you hear how quiet you made us? And you looked at me knowingly. And I got to say. You made us so quiet. You looked at me so knowingly. I think Mario and Luigi are Christmas. Are Mario and Luigi Christmas. Is Mario and Luigi Christmas? Gurgle this. No, he's looking at is Mario and Luigi.

Game. They don't. They're red and green. Is Mario and Luigi Christmas? Is Mario and Luigi Christmas on a shirt? Hands down. Hands down. Hands down. Hands down. Hards down. Hems down. Hems down. Is Mario and Luigi Christmas? Yeah, Mario and Luigi are literally Christmas. They're literally red and green. Okay, so maybe that's the advice. I think that's good. My advice is lean into the Christmas of it all, your Christmas. Okay, here's some, here's some person who might.

Here's some person. Guys, I feel unsafe. I'm so sorry. Do you want me to be the predator wall again? Here is a person. Guys, I know I'm weird. No, no, no, no, no. You're very strange.

No, you're so normal. You guys, here we go. Hot Lola Bunny. Oh, yeah. Hot Lola Bunny. She doesn't need a lick of advice. Hot Lola Bunny? She doesn't need a lick for me.

She just needs a lick for me with, Helen, Henny, Lola Bunny. Yeah, what we've learned today is you're really into animals. Yeah. Oh my God. Holy shit. Oh, my God. Let's make sure her safe search is on. Because I think we're going to.

Oh, shit. Woo! See, this is my thing about Lola Bunny. You don't see a lot of Lola Bunny stuff, but a Lola Bunny movie. You would crush in that, like, in that outfit. Like with the hair? Me? Yeah, because you've got like a bunny vibe.

I do? I think so. I don't think I look like Lola Bunny because I think I look like Anne Frank. That's what I mean, actually. Well, can you not look like both. No, you can't because Anne Frank and Lola Bunny are so different. Get you a man who can do both. Wait, you guys.

I was in a restaurant. You guys, I don't know what's wrong with me this episode. What's happening? Maybe we have to cut me. No, cut me for the episode. I was at a restaurant this weekend or last week. And a woman, one of the women who was like running food to people, put my food. down and she looked at me and she goes, you know who you look like?

And I was like, oh no, no. And she goes, Miss Frizzle and walks away. You were worried she was going to say, Anne Frank? Well, I was, I was expecting Anne Frank because everyone is like, you look like Anne Frank slash any Holocaust victim ever. But she was like, yeah, you look like Miss Frizzle. And I was like, I don't know if that's really comfortable. Were you wearing a fun outfit?

No. Oh, my God, look at her. Look, Miss Frizzles is so great. Is this on the Marvel website? What is going on? Is Miss Frizzle in the Marvel universe? Yeah, she's in the Marvel version. It's going to be like...

Yeah, Ms. Frizzle was going to say in Avengers. Yeah. Ms. Rizzle were a turn in Avengers too. She would crush an Avengers. But I don't really know that I look like Ms. Frissel at all. Does she have a dragon? This show is all over the place. No, to me.

To me. I thought it was an educational show for kids. Oh, remember when they go to... Would they get nutted on by salmon? Yes, that's what I was going to say. Yeah. Do you remember when they get knotted on by salmon? The magic school bus getting knitted on by salmon.

What are we talking about? So Miss Frizzle takes them to the bottom of the ocean. Because she shrinks them down and she makes them into salmon. Here we go. and they are staying in salmon eggs and then they're trying to show reproduction but I think they just didn't want to show animals fucking so they were like the salmon nut on all the salmon eggs and all the kids are like this is awesome I love learning what are we talking about that's so crazy and then you're going to go no way no YouTube premium so okay you're your your kings are low of money hell and honey and this all in eggs and they're all going I'm in an egg oh shit fuck I'm in this egg they're saying We should do it. Oh, no.

Here's the predator. Look, the salmon is shaking its tail getting ready to nut. Oh, my God. That's really what I do when I'm ready to nut. Yeah, that's what I do when I'm ready to nut. Yeah, that's his hair. Oh, my God. He literally is nothing.

It's humping. It's humping the air. Wait, what the fuck is going on? Oh, my God. What? The bus is a fish. I forgot. Wait.

She's so happy. Oh, she's fucking the salmon. And it's like the lizard dinosaur. And it's like pressing the buttons to make the salmon turned on. Yep. And now he's going to. Oh, my God. There's a money shot.

and porkpop.com. This is so disgusting. Oh, no, this is literally like, this is so hot. They're all nutting. And the kids are like, it's a gang bang dude. Salmon orgy.

The kids are so excited. They're being nutted. Yeah, look at them. They're smiling. They're being like, I love this. They're like, this is great to learn this. This is foul.

This is so bad. It's so anyway. So do you think that's what the person was getting at? Yes, she was like, when I see you, I think about salmon nutting. No, but she walked away

right after she was like, you look like Miss Frizzle. And I was like, I don't, know if that's a compliment. I don't really know what we're talking about. And I don't feel like I look like Ms. Ristold. Did the staff come over and go, she does not work here. Yes. And then later on, she came back to grab my plate and she just goes, my favorite teacher. That woman didn't work at the restaurant. Sorry, you were poisoned.

I was like, my favorite teacher. Oh my God. Then she walked into a playglass window. Yeah. My favorite teacher. And went through it. And then she was arrested. Oh, my God. My favorite. Too about with your hands up. So anyway, the reason I didn't think I look like Lola Bunny is because I've been told so many times that I look like either Anne Frank, a woman who has survived the Holocaust or died in it. Yeah.

And Miss Frizzle. I'd like an Nora style Lola Bunny movie. Oh, fuck, yeah. You know what I mean? Just something gritty and raw. Oh, fuck. Yeah. Lola Bunny, just shaking that.

And then something and it's like, actually there's a lot of humidity in this. Oh, yeah. We had actually sick. Yeah. Yeah. learn about her humanity. Wait, we should learn about her humanity. Wait, maybe that's the advice for Lola Bunny is we should learn about her humanity. Well, I think Lola Bunny should just try to do more serious dramatic work. Okay, we gave advice to Lola Bolly. What about what about woke Lola Boney,

which is the Lola Boney everyone got mad at when they decided to make her look more like just like a normal character. Oh yeah. What is the difference? Let me see the comparison, the side by side. She's still adorable. I think she's just, wait, which one is the one on the right is the new Lola Bona. What are the basketball shorts that are a little longer? They just made her like a little bit less, like, sexualized and a little bit more just like a bunny who does basketball. She's just like a girl bunny who plays basketball. I mean, okay, so here's the thing.

I think that there is like, whatever, right? I think that the old little buddy is like awesome and the new little bunny. It is sort of like they did this. And for what? Like, Lilibunny is allowed to be hot. I think she doesn't have to be hot. That's, you know, I don't think a really good point. She's allowed to be hot and she doesn't have to be hot.

She doesn't have to be hot. But I think it's like, it's fine for Lola Bunny to be sort of something I'm going Bozoing at. Right. But the new Lola Bunny, it's like, okay, yeah, she's just like a female character that's not that. They're different Lullaby. You can't. I was just going to say, cool.

She's an athlete. I was just going to say, new Lola Bunny is hot for different, in a different style. She's hot actually, like, W&A hot. She's like at Fitch night. Yeah. Like new Lola Bunny is like. She's like an athlete. She's cool.

She's confident. Sid, Sudney. Please. New Lola Bunny is a top. Old Lola Bunny is a bottom. 100%. I agree. I agree with that.

Yeah. New Lola Bunny is a stud. And then old Lola Bunny is sort of like, you know. And that's the thing is it's like, it's not actually that new Lola Bunny isn't hot. Agreed. New Lola bunny is a stud. I mean, she's got the arm thing on. You know, less hot tips.

I mean, she's still like fucking stacked. Again, like this is what I would say is like in the Lola Bunny multiverse. I'd like there to be a million different types of Lola Bals. Well, I feel like these Lola Bunnies would also like be in a relationship. I agree. I think there's like a femme and a much one. A good relationship and I think they live on the east side and I think they're fucking sick as hell. Yeah. That's really true. I think they're great. I think they have like an Instagram presence in the queer community. Oh my God, they're great. So then, okay, any advice for new lullabunny? New Lullabunny? Live your truth. If we're going to do this, then it's like I want her to do action. You know what I mean? If we're like, we're actually not just sort of male gazee bunny anymore. We're actually cool and more athletic. New Lola Bunny, I think would be really good. in a war movie. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

You know? Like, saving Private Ryan, but she's the only one that's animated, like a space jam version of saving Private Ryan. Correct. And why don't we have that? And why don't we have that yet? Okay, next, you want to give some advice

for the sexy Green Eminem who's taking its skin off? You know what's so funny is I was just thinking about Green Eminem when we were talking about this? Very, very similar. Did you see Tucker Carlson's out about the Green Em? Oh, it's hilarious. Yeah. Oh, yeah.

No, I got to be honest, again, I do think that Green Eminem is allowed to be hot. If we want to have a hot green Eminem and I think that's fine. New Green and Green Eminem. What is the difference, though? I feel like that there was, oh, I love that. It's truly like... I actually like this a lot. You like this?

I think this is nice. She's taking her skin off. Is this, well, is it skin or is it a shirt? No, that's her fucking skin. Well, so, here's my question, though. Are all of the different M&M? To me, this is a shirt. No, that's her skin.

Also, she's in hot water. She's going to melt alive. She's chocolate. Oh, yes, she's trying to commit suicide. And then murder. You think the old... You think the old... Eminems, all of the Eminems

are wearing shirts that are those colors? I think that they're the same. They're the same like horrifying being. Maybe it's their skin, but then they're so they're nude, so where's their genitalian? How are they reproducing? So then we should put a penis on the red and peanut Eminem.

Yeah, that's really true. Okay, so maybe that's the advice. Because their penis is hidden and they don't have any reproductive organs. I don't know if they poop. I don't think they eat. They must eat in the commercials. They don't even M&Ms. They eat each other. You think so? Maybe. Like cinnamon toast crunch.

Oh, they do eat each other. I mean, I think the agreement, so this is a fan drawing. This is not real. I think this is canon. I don't know. I think this is hot to me. Your taste is crazy. My wife always just goes, you think everything's hot.

She's like, you need to have some. And I'm like, no, I think everybody's beautiful. I think everyone's really hot. That's actually beautiful. And I do think I relate to that. Yeah, I just am like, yeah, I can find the, I do, I do find kind of everyone hot in their own way. I'm like, yeah, they got this kind of vibe.

Yeah, they're just like everyone's kind of got a fucking vibe. Yeah, and I think this type of green M&M is good. But what's the problem with new green and M? She just doesn't have slender limbs. I think she was wearing heels and now she's wearing sneakers is the biggest difference. Oh, my God. But I talked her problems and tried to kill himself over it. That'd be awesome.

Specifically in this situation, though, she's pulling down her skin. That, yeah, it's giving penis. Oh, yeah, it's so foreskin coated. It's very foreskin coated. It's yossifying foreskin. That's not. Yossifying foreskin. Wow, that's my memoir.

Yeah. Yassifying foreskin. I love to yosophy it. I get what you mean that, okay, so it is probably her skin because her, you don't wear a shirt over your eyelids. Okay, and that's such a good point. You don't wear a shirt of your eyelids. You know what I mean? And her mouth is sort of barren now.

So I do think that this is bad. It's also not the texture of the M&M shell coating. Yeah. It's not glossy. It's like it would be shattering if she was actually taking down her. Because it's a hard candy shell. Agreed. This almost looks like the brown M&M is wearing a green shirt.

And her eyebrow is floating above her body. I also don't like that the arms and legs are flesh color. Yeah. Like white people flesh color. I was just about to say. The arms and legs are white people color. Let me check my privilege on the M&M's arm. Okay.

Yes, it is true. She is multiple toned. Yeah. Something's happening here. She's pulling your skin off. Yeah, I got problems with this. My advice is keep your skin on, girl. Queenie.

That is my advice is Queen. Keep that skin on, queen. Miles, we've taken up so much of your freaking time. It's been an honor. I've loved this. And you're a father. I am. And we're taking time away from your children.

No, it's okay. Hey, Daddy's going to go to work. The Rock and the Fest and Fury is going to be like. You got to go to work and look at some hot cartoons and comment on their bodies? Big day at work. It's just like in the 50s going to a mine. Big day and work. Daddy's got to talk about Helen, Henny, and how she got that ass.

Daddy's going to talk about Helen. Well, we're so happy you came on. Oh, my God. You guys are the best. I'm happy to do it anytime. The absolute best. Tell the people, if the people are so dummy. If the people are stoopy, stupid.

And they don't know where to find you. Where do they find you? You can find me at Miles Bond is like my handle and everything. And then if you want to watch my podcast, start with the signal. Livy episode. It is called Perfect Person. It is on every platform. You can watch it on YouTube. You can listen to it on audios. It's an absolutely lovely podcast.

The other day I was getting my hair cut and my hairstylist had it playing. Really? I love that. While she was just like playing it and she was like and she was like I love this. I was like oh my god. That's so cool. Wow. I didn't even say like I'm on an episode. Wait. You should have been like I'm on one of these episodes. I just was like yeah. Oh could you look up this episode?

I just pretend like, yeah. That's so funny. But yeah, I felt like it would be too weird to be like I actually know him. You should have said. I actually know him. She stops getting your hair, leaves. Okay, so thank you so much for being here. Yes, have a thing.

You guys, if you are not already, become a little shartiana on the Patreon. Yeah, shart yourself on our Patreon. It's $5 is per shart. And it's really fun. We've got a lot of stuff there. We've got more content. We've got early uploads. Uncut.

Uncum. Answered episodes. And everything else you'd ever want, go check out the Patreon. And until next time, we'll see you next Tuesday. Let's do a freeze frame. Go!