Syd & Olivia Talk Sh*t - Spencer Agnew Is The Internet's Boyfriend ❤️

Episode Date: April 14, 2026

This week internet sex symbol Spencer Agnew is on the big bad podcast for you! Sign up for your one-dollar-per-month trial today at https://SHOPIFY.COM/sydandliv Remember these episodes now go up a few days early AND with bonus content on Patreon & Fourthwall! https://www.patreon.com/c/syd_and_olivia https://sydandolivia-shop.fourthwall.com/ Chapters: Listen to the show on the go! Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/2j0iQxY9Pf0h4mXEOFxgmk?si=a95ba3e2a2844ec4 This is a 7equis Network Show Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

I guess the question is like, how do you feel about being an internet sex symbol on our algorithms recently in the last week? It's so funny that you guys get it. Yeah. All the time. Every other video is like, okay, so you want to fuck Spencer. And I'm like, no, that's my friend. And I'm like, that's my friend. No, that's my friend.

I don't have my soundboard today because I'm stupid and so instead we do sounds with mouth. I'll be overcompensating and said we'll be making sounds with their mouths. Do the falling down the stairs one. I'm the Sud one. I'm the Olivia one. This is Sid and Olivia Talk. You guys, we have a very special third one today. Yes.

We're losing our shit. We're freaking our out. I'm freaking my out. I'm freaking my out. I'm losing me mind. And today our mind has been lost to Spencer Agnew. Have you guys ever heard like shut the up? Shut the up.

It's just like, yeah, I like that. I like that. It's just something funny you would text out. That's really good. Shut the up. is really good. Yeah. It's like I don't think it works as well verbally, but it's like it seemed like akin to what you guys were written on. Yeah, this is a hard thing to say right in the beginning of the podcast, but I've been saying K my S. Oh shit. That's fun. Which I like a lot. There are

certain things that are just like fun to say. Yeah, that's a fun way. People are like, you know, it's like, oh, is that your vocal tick? It's like, it's like maybe or I'm just saying it a lot. Maybe you don't need to diagnose me with everything. Sometimes I'd just be saying stuff. Sometimes I'd be saying it. Okay. So I have to confront you about something. Oh. Immediately. Immediately. Immediately. What's going on with my TikTok algorithm. Oh my God. Do you know about, you know about this? Oh.

You know about this. Right? What is going on? I literally don't know about it. No way. If someone saw my TikTok, they'd be like, okay, so you're in love with Spencer. Do you know about all the thirst trap edits that are going around? And do you know why they're all on my TikTok?

No, like, I have heard like, but this, this has kind of been going on like, I don't want to like, too much. This has been going on for years. Like people in my life will be like, dude, I'm getting all these like thirst edits of you. I'm like, watch. Here's what I think. Here's what I think it is. I think friends of Smosh, right? If you're like, oh, I'm friends with these people, so I follow them, the algorithm goes like, well, then you must be someone who's following them because you want thirst trap edits of them.

And then for me, it's like, oh, no, I'm following them because I know them and they're my friend. No, the algorithm has been like, okay, so your sex symbol is Spencer. Yeah. How do you feel about that? No, and it's, to be completely honest, the last week, it's been like, it's been, it's been, crazy for me. It's been up. There was this video. Yeah, for cast two, there's been a spike. It's like the last week has been, and are you paying someone? I'm literally, I'm like, I'm not on TikTok really. Like,

I will log on TikTok like once a month to kind of like open up all the TikToks that I've been sent. Like I will open up TikTok frequently to watch TikToks that people send me. Right. I'm not scrolling on the feet. But when they are not, no. When you open the app, does it show you a bunch of thirst traps of yourself? It will typically show me like, um, It will be like Smosh adjacent stuff. Yeah. Like it will be. That's a wider category than specifically what we are getting.

We are getting something very. Do you have anything? Yeah, I sent Cass some. Cass, can you pull up some of these sexy, sexy edits? I'm like genuinely not in that many videos. And that's like the funny thing. Like they're scraping. Yeah.

They're like, you've struck a nerve. Yeah. You've struck a very sexual nerve with people. They want what they can't have. It makes me like, it makes me like uncomfortable because I'm like, you don't want me to see this. Yeah. It's like, you don't want me to see this. me to look at this. To me, they are so funny. Like, I'm like, like, to me, they always feel a bit tongue and cheek.

Right, right. I see what you. I don't think they are. Oh, this is really hard for me. That was the one time I ever tried something different with my hair. And like, when you try something different with your hair in a video, it's like, that shit's forever. Yeah. Yeah. There it looks fine. I think it's, you don't like it. I think you look great in this. I don't like. But also, clearly so many people think you look great in this. And, and that's, I guess the question is like, how do you feel? about being an internet sex symbol on our algorithms recently in the last week. It's so funny that you guys get it. Yeah. All the time.

Every other video is like, okay, so you want to fuck Spencer. And I'm like, no, that's my friend. And I'm like, that's my friend. No, that's my friend. Yeah. It's an odd, like, it doesn't feel real to me. Because I never, like, it does not translate to real life. And really, like, I feel like I have such a normal amount of, like, interactions with people.

Right. I've never felt like, I'll watch like movies sometimes and like, you know, you'll see someone like make eyes at someone in a movie. And I will have like the feeling of like no one has ever done that like that like I thing to me. And like this like. Right. In real life, you're like I'm a guy. And really like it's like everyone treats me like a guy. Yeah.

So you're essentially Hannah Montana living a double life. Wait. Yeah, clearly. Wait, you get the best of both worlds. When you're in your normal life, you're like, I'm just a normal guy. I'm Miley. You get bullied by the by the mean girls in school. And then when you go home.

home on the internet, your Hannah Montana, everybody's like, whoa, wow, it's a lot of tickets to your show. And you're Hannah Montana. And you just had your 20 year reunion. Yeah, congratulations for that. Thank you. Thank you. Yeah. The thing I will say, and this, it's always hard to, like, bring this up without sounding, like, conceded or something. But I'm like, because a lot of the Smoshcastle talk about, like, how often they are recognized in public. And I'm like, are people just, like, never saying anything to me? Like, because I feel like, well. Yeah. I guess. one I think I don't I like almost never leave the house two I think I live in an area where there are probably like legitimate like a lot of legitimate celebrities so kind of the expectation is like oh leave him alone right right right right but like they're like you know there will be like weeks where all like I will go somewhere and just like be like all around and like not a single person will say anything I'm like and that like that feels normal to me yeah it might be that they're too they're feeling too shy because of how they're so turned on they're so turned on the quivering has and they have to like run in they have to run into the bathroom and do zoomies.

I got to say, this is like a really cool thing to have. To be like, okay, there's just like a bunch of people out there who are like, holy fuck. Yeah, we are pro this, by the way. No, I'm, it's so funny. It's like, it's such a fun, unique. It's just going to be a trippy experience. Yeah, I don't like, I hate to say like, I don't think about it too much.

Because if I do, like, I think it would drive you a little crazy or something where you would think about yourself differently. I would say that I don't, I didn't think about it at all, ever even, even. even once until I've, now it's just my, my phone is just here you go. How, my question is how do I monetize this? No, that's such a good point. Maybe you should be making your own edits. Ghost account.

You need to make your own fan account. And you can get exclusive footage of yourself because you're you. That's such a good point. So you can do extra sexy footage. Yeah. I mean, if you made an only fan, you'd kill. I'm not telling you to do that. No, but you could.

It has like, I don't want to be like it's something I think about often, but like every once in a while, that thought will crop up. And it's like, one, I can never. point a camera at myself in any capacity. Sure, I get that. Like, I can't even film, like, a video of myself playing a video game if I don't have, like, a chat or something. Right, right, right, right, right.

The idea of, like, trying to photograph myself in a sexual manner. I get you. Because, like, I have no qualms. To me, it's, like, the older, it's like, who, maybe you guys feel this, too? It's like, who does the fuck if someone sees me naked or, like, whatever? Yeah, whatever. As long as I look fine. Yeah, like, as long as, like, you're in control.

Because, like, the idea of something leaking is such a different where it's like, oh, like, that's not the, but it's like, literally. I don't want an unflattering naked picture of me anywhere because that's a bummer. Like I don't want like a before picture from like if I was like, oh, I'm so inflamed. I'm trying to eat anti-inflammatory foods. Let me take a before picture. I don't want that leaked. I did watch the episode where you all talked about the neck injections.

And you had the picture of the before of the neck swelling. That was crazy. I love like a. Thank you. My family group chat, we have like a couple pictures of like family members. like when they've been like hospitalized. Nice. And we'll be like,

remember when mom was in the hospital? Yeah. Like this picture where she's like like in the, but it's like she had her thyroid taken out. Oh shit. It's like a funny, you know, it's like a funny. It's a bit we do.

Yeah. I do think there are ways to make nudity funny that I am really pro. Nudity is so funny. It's so not sexy most of the time. No, I sometimes I feel like an alien. Actually, often I feel like an alien. Well, there are like different, like you can be medical. about it.

Yeah, absolutely. Or you can be sexy about it or you can be. Or you can be We Spot about it where you're just like, wow, I'm in nature. You don't go often? I do. I will, I don't go often, but I do go. I've never been. Oh, it's very fun.

I've heard it's great. You can't go because someone will make an edit of you there. Like, dude, saw it's penis. Yeah. Let's watch this one. Oh, no. This is a good one, Spencer. You're kind of attracted right now and it's like much.

The kissing is. That's just looping? Wait, okay. It's just looping. Then go to the next one because the next one's crazy. Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no.

Me being like, oh, I have the wall. I know this one. Oh, I know this one. The kissing, the kissing clip is like, well, because I'd never seen. Oh, God. Oh, I didn't know that. Wait, play with sound. I don't think skinny.

What is it? Oh, oh, a sticky. Yeah. This feels like a remix of the previous one. Yeah. They used a lot of the same clips. Okay, so here's the thing. Is that bizarre?

Or is that like a vibe? to me the kiss one I'm always surprised I'm like I don't I thought it would look worse kissing right right right right okay I'm like oh like I don't look that's always a good feeling terrible like you know I like I have a jaw line there like I'm like oh fuck yeah that's a good point someone can like because the idea of seeing me kiss someone is like oh my god I get that you're like I want to kiss someone but I'm gonna we have my eyes closed and like it's not that's not I never do that. Yeah, that's why you always keep your eyes wide open.

That's why I keep my eyes wide open and I have some extra eyes over here. You go like this when you kiss people. Well, I have panorama view like a goat so that I can like see myself from different. Do you know the goats see in panorama? Their pupils are horizontal. Can we look up goat pupils? What was there a kissing thing for? It was we used to do a lot of kissing at Smosh.

Pishing at Smosh. No, they did. But no, it was. We did a lot of like punishment-based content. And so it would be like, you know, the meta on YouTube at that point was like, oh, like we'll play Mario Kart. But every time like you fucking fall off the map, you get kicked in the head. Oh, that's everything. And you know, it's just kind of like trying to figure out like, oh, you eat hot pepper.

Did anyone get concussion for them? Probably. I love that. I mean, we did have like way back in the day, there were definitely more injuries. Way back in the way more concussion for me. The way things kind of change is the older we got. people can still get hurt doing kind of the dumbest things. Yeah.

Well, and that's, I think as you age, the way that you get hurt ends up being dumber and dumb. Oh, absolutely. I used to, like, I used to be able to get hurt only if I was doing something genuinely physically strenuous or dangerous. But now, as I'm aging a little bit, it's like I can get hurt by standing up. Oh, yeah. And it's like, that's not a thing that I'm used to.

No, my biggest injury was I talked about it last time I was here on the, the assumptions thing or whatever. We were filming a TikTok for Smosh. I put my hands behind my back to like it was like a yeah the joke was like oh you're getting arrested for queer baiting or whatever and and I felt something in my back like just shift or something like that I was like this doesn't feel right this doesn't like and I had to do like a year of physical therapy that's a nightmare and like and I have had to like exercise every not every day since but like you know I've had to do like rebuild the muscles in my back to be like oh now that won't happen

oh that's a nightmare damn that's such a nightmare because I grew up like never hurting my back Like, you know, to me, back pain is such a... It's not a thing that usually happens when you're younger. Yeah, it's like a ubiquitous thing for, like, so many people are getting old. I hurt my back, yeah. And that did happen. Wow. See, the weird thing is, like, all of my injuries that I've had that are kind of like what you weren't doing anything were actually from when I was younger.

I, like, popped my kneecap out of my socket three times. But the craziest part about that. I popped her right back in, but I had to get on a plane. So I, I put my pop my kneecap out of my socket and I was reading. So I was just like, I was a child and I was... You popped your kneecap out by reading. What were you reading? Oh, God, I don't remember because of the knee pain.

But, like, I do remember it popped out. And then my, I feel sick. We lived in Vegas at the time. And my mom, for some reason, had this thing where she's like, I don't trust Vegas doctors. It's all the craziest thing. So she. Yeah. Yeah, yeah.

But no offense. In that moment, she took me to the airport and then put me on a plane. She carried sin. So it does get crazy. The story does get out. And we went to Los Angeles and went to a Kaiser Permanente. Yeah. Which is kind of wild just to be like, oh, it's popped and I'm in this.

I'm being carried in an airport. It's like, you know, when your ears pop on an airplane. It's exactly like that. I thought it would be like a reverse thing. It's like ear pop, knee pop. Yeah, knee pops back in. Yeah. My craziest injury just in terms of like how I got it being crazy was that I think I was like in either in college.

I was in my early 20s. And I was at my parents' house. My mom was making spaghetti and meatballs. Classic mom. That's so mom. And the turkey meatballs are so good. So fucking good. And I was like, well, I'm going to have one of these.

So I have a meatball. I try to take a bite. It is so hot. So then I drop it because it's so hot that I'm like, oh, and it burns my boob. And it burns my boobs so bad that I have to bite open a vitamin E capsule. And then when I bite open the vitamin E capsule to put it on my. burn, I chip my tooth. That's some fucking looney tune.

Yeah. Do you ever read the fanfiction about you? Oh, God. No, because fanfic, like, you know, I won't pretend to be well-versed in the ways of fanfic. There's just so many, it's not like served to me. Fanfic feels like something you have to seek out. Yeah.

I like fan. We love fanficion in this house because it is so upsetting. And we write fan fictions for each other all the time, which is really fun. Like, but about things that are like. I feel like I could get, like, if I were, where I. You know, do you have, yeah. Absolutely, I would be into that. Yeah.

I mean, not maybe not about me, but like. Do you, are you pulling one up? What? This is an episode called makes Spencer uncomfortable. Like, do y'all get shipped together a lot? Yeah. To me, there is like an inherent, you know, this is such a. There's an inherent straight guy take.

Like, what's like, to me, there's nothing more like, erotic than friendship. Yeah, but I mean, like, what is, what is, what's more erotic than friendship? Yeah. Yeah. Like, there's, it is, like, there is an intimacy in a close. That's that is so close to a relationship. Yeah. And it's just like, you know, why not have fun?

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. We had, um, I found I was looking. Sorry. I was looking. I was looking.

Oh, no. Just that young internet. Because there's like, A.O3 is like the hub. Okay. Yeah. Tumblr is also. Is that a thing? I think that's this one.

What is a thing. I just Googled. You used that Google. And I just saw. But this is not even the fan fiction. This is the description for the fan fiction to decide if you want to read it. Oh, I'm so upset. It's called, do I know you?

And it's you started to work in the Smosh Games department and Spencer Agnew caught your eye. You end up falling in love with him. Does you feel the same? Oh. That sounds very safe. How far into it do we have sex though? I don't know. I didn't really look at all the chapters because there were many.

But it is like a, it's made so it's the. POV is you. POVU. That has been the newest Twitter discourse was because one person was like I can't read first person stories because I can't relate

to that story in that way. I'm like I didn't do that and everyone's just been like roasting them because it's like you think of fucking it's like yeah it's like you can't like you can't imagine. Yeah.

I kind of get that. Yeah. Because I feel like I would hear things that they do and I'd be like well that's way smarter than what I would have done. You have the opposite. I could never do that. I could never do that.

Maybe in the privacy of my own home. I could never work. That's so funny. I could never work at Smosh games. I could never work at Smosh games. I don't have the resume for it. Oh, wow. Wow. I do like to me the most fascinating part about those is like, you know, how someone would think, because you have to obviously have like a lot of like. I know. Yes. Imagination. It's like you're imagining the infrastructure of a real place. Yeah. As like a real infrastructure. Yeah. How everyone interacts. How like what do you think I do in a day? Yeah. Yes. And that to me is like obviously I'm curious about that. It's like even more fascinating than to probably sexual parts because it's like we know what those will probably be. Yeah.

Because we've all imagined sex. Well. And we've all imagined sex with you now. Yes. For us, our friends. I like the viewers at home. That is like the like well, I don't know. There's no, there's nothing more erotic in friendship.

Yeah. I've always said that. When you're starting something new. Right. It's terrifying. It's deeply terrifying. I feel like when we decided to start putting videos on the internet, that was a really scary move.

Absolutely. But it's paid off. Yeah, doing the podcast, deeply terrifying. Bringing the podcast back after a hiatus, terrifying. Paid off. Paid off. When so much work goes into something that you're not sure if anyone will see or watch or care about or like, it's nerve-wracking. And when you're starting a business, it really helps to have a partner like Shopify by your side.

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It's time to turn those what-ifs into with Shopify today. Sign up for your $1 per month trial at Shopify.com slash sid and live. Go to Shopify.com slash Sid and Live. That's Shopify.com slash sit and live. Well, we want to set you up with someone. We want to, we think. Are you deployed to me or? No, no, no, you.

I was talking about, I was talking about we wanted play a game with you. Okay. We're going to help you. We're matchmakers. It's one of our big things that we do. We're going to help you find your perfect match. Because the whole internet is thirsting over you. You're such an eligible bachelor.

You should have a match. Yeah. So we're going to do a matchmaking. We're flying three fans. Yeah. These are all fans of you, by the way. Okay, so we're going to tell it. We're going to give you a this or that.

And then you pick, you tell us why. And then the winner will be versus another one. And we'll go down the bracket until there's a clear winner. So who is the lucky lady? This is a segment called Who's the Lucky Thing? Music. Cut the music. Okay.

Are you ready? Yeah. Raws from Monsters Inc. Oh, wow. Or Edna Mode from the Incredibles. Oh, wow. Okay. Wait, who's the first one?

So, Raus from Monster. Is that the front desk lady? Uh-huh. The slug front desk. Okay. You can think about it. Oh, Edna. Or Edna.

So that's Roz. Oh, you would go with Edna? Are you guys not going with Edna? I would go with Edna, yeah. Edna's like, you know, nothing against monsters, but like. Edna mode from Incredibles. The thing about Edna is she's so crazy. Like, I would love to have that.

It doesn't Brad Bird play her? Yes. Okay, yeah. Oh, yeah, it says played by Brad Bird. I would love to have that haircut. I feel like that. I think you could do that. I feel like it would kind of fuck.

She's at least like kind of human. Yeah, she's technically human. Yeah. I think the thing I enjoy about species human. The thing I enjoy about Roz is I imagine her very tall. And you like that? Yeah. Okay.

I think that'd be fun. Like I think she's gigantic and that could be fun. I'm going to be like not even human gigantic. Another voice by a man. Interesting. Bob Peterson. Oh, interesting. Unwook take of me.

Certain looks can work better for certain. Well, certain looks can work better for people and certain looks can work better for slug monster. Yes. And so that's something. Yeah, I honestly, I don't know. I kind of fuck with Roz, but it's about you. I also think she seems kind of angry and that turns me off. I agree.

Like, Edna, like, yeah. Well, it's like, I guess do you want really big grumpy woman, really tiny grumpy woman? Edna just felt, I feel like there'd be more we could talk about. Yeah. Like capes and stuff. Yeah, like how was Ross? Did Ross make an appearance in Monsters University? Probably.

She better. Like young Roz. Probably. She better, and she better be hot. Can we look up young Roz? I don't know if I ever saw Monsters University. That was not very good. No.

Is that her? I mean, that might just be like AI rendition of. Oh, yeah. She looks scorched. Monsters at work. Oh, it says a Roz by another name. Oh, Monsters at Work. Oh, is that a show?

No idea. Did not know. Hey, TAL. Oh, she's the leader of the child detection agency. So I don't really know what that means. No, thanks. Because I haven't seen that movie in a while. Okay. Okay. Okay. So you're going with Edna. Okay. Edna mode. Edna or a real life anglerfish. You're familiar with these? Oh, Edna, dude. Really? Yeah. You don't like the anglerfish. You're horrifying. No, they're perfect because they can see underwater in the dark. I had a moment where I looked in the mirror once in 2024 and I was having a bad day and I was like, oh my God, I look exactly like an angler fish. And I spent one. week thinking I looked exactly.

I spent one week. Yeah. And I, it's, it's not totally false. I mean, just. Have you guys ever seen how big there? How big are they? Look up how, look up anglerfish size. Oh my God.

Can we see a comparison to a penny? Can we see it compared to a vape? That's not real. That's not true. They are, they are freakishly small. Wait, really? Oh, really? They're teeny, teeny.

That's a big one then. No, no, these are. These are fake. This is fake. These are fake. Like, I'm pretty sure they are like... The hand? Actual science.

That's the creation. You're on the creation wiki, the encyclopedia of creation science. Creation science? They're like, so dinosaurs died a couple thousand years ago. Oh, my God. And anglerfish is huge. I didn't know that existed. Oh, this is it on a table.

So if you kind of think about what a table would be like, this is kind of the size comparison. I was under the impression they were, they were like, like goldfish size. Yeah, the one that's tiny. I don't think they're goldfish size. Here's what I will say. I bet they can be when they're young. I bet they can be goldfish size. But the one I'm pitching to you isn't very young.

It's up age. It's of age. So we love that. And that's actually my favorite part. What am I going to do with this fucking anglerfish? I have no idea. Well, I don't know. They can't come to the surface.

She's going to keep the lights on for you. That's so true. And that's kind of beautiful. Yeah, that is. That's like, that's really good. You can pick whoever you want. It's your body. Edna mode.

Your body is. I think they eat the men. I think the anglerfish the men. You know what? So you just saved yourself. No, no, no, no. The men shrivel up and become testicles on them or something. What? Yeah. Because that's a female angri-fish. They become like a little ball-sac on the girl. Someone told me that on the Patreon because we talked about anglerfish a lot. So you don't become a little shriveled ball sack and that's good. And that's self-care. That's an insane fact. Can we make sure that's true? So you're sticking with Edna. Anglerfish men. I don't even think they should check. It's like the classic like the spider killing the. Yeah. The, or, uh, it's like a kinkier black widow. Yeah. Or it's like they eat the, the male. That's fucking crazy. Yeah, see?

The male is like that one. Yeah, taking romantic attachment. They fuse. So that's codependent. Fuse with their mates. Yeah. God, that is. They fuse with their mates become a little sack of sperm and then I think fall off and die,

which is, honestly, codependent. I think it's kind of cool. I don't. Women's stories matter. It needs, it needs to read codependent no more. No, I think it's kind of. of sick as hell. And then it needs to go to group therapy. I think it's cool because this is the thing. I think so many women in heterosexual relationships complain about their partner not supporting

them. Not fusing to their body. And in this situation, this male anglerfish is really supporting this female anglerfish in that it's kind of holding her up from the bottom. Yeah. I mean, it's at least. Is that him? Yeah. He's the, he's the arrow. He's the little dick. Spencer. That's like all of him? What is that? Yeah. That's, it's a crazy. That's all of him. All of me. Fuses to all of you with your angler fish headlamp. Why is it so small?

Because that's how they do it. Kind of cut off my son. Sexual dimorphism at its finest. I always do that. Yeah. And my band, sexual dimorphism at its finest is playing for the first time at the Whiskey a go-go tonight. That's exciting.

I'll be there. Yeah. Thank you. Thank you. I appreciate it. Next. So you're going to go with Edna. Yes.

Okay. Edna or the beard-eating vulture. a. A.k.a. A.B.A. a bone-eating hawk. I love vultures and like any... Look at this motherfucker. Oh, he's gorgeous. So, like, I was a huge dinosaur kid growing up.

Oh, that's all. Obviously, I'm like, what is... This is the most beautiful thing I've ever seen. I also will say this is a bone-eating... A bone-eating... Wait, did you say the beard-eating vulture or the bone-eating hawk? I think I heard beard-eared-eating vulture. I heard a beard-eared-old.

I think it's a beard-vulture comma. In my notes, which is nothing, I have... The beard-eating vulture, a bone-eating hawk. But there is no beard-eating vulture. It can't, that can't, it's probably a bearded vulture. I believe you. A beard-eat. No, I just showed you.

What do you mean I believe you? I just showed you. I believe that that's in your notes. What do you mean? You make me feel crazy. A bone-eating hawk is actually a bearded vulture. Okay, but a beard-eating vulture. Why do I have it as a beard-eating vulture?

But imagine like a beard-eating vulture. Yeah, like swoops down and eats people's beard. A beard vulture. He is bearded, though. Look at that. Yeah. So he's bearded. Oh, that's, I thought that was like Carian.

No, that's his beard. That's sick as fuck. He's actually. So it's a bearded vulture or a bone-eating hawk. And what I was going to say is a bone-eating hawk means that it's going to eat your bone, if you know what I mean. Volter-Tua. Yeah, Volture-Tua. We, yes.

Guys, dogs with beards, like when they get like poodles or whatever beard. Yeah. I fucking love that shit. This beard looks like he's going to start doing magic tricks at a bar. Yeah. Like I have beef with magicians. Yeah. At bars?

In general. Just like it is a, I feel confronted. Okay. And I feel I have to perform along with them. Oh, I have to pretend you're impressed. I have to pretend. I have to stay engaged. Yeah.

I have to stay engaged when it's like, you know, I'm usually, I'm like, I want to engage with my friends. Right. You know, I, this is a stranger coming up and I have to give. To me, energy is always like. Yeah. It's fine. For me, like I have to, yeah, it's very finite for me. Yeah. Yeah, it's like I'm doing you a favor by

By supporting your. It's like walking up to someone with a fucking video on your phone. It's like, hey, watch this funny video. It's like, fuck, fuck. Like, I didn't want to. And now I have to be like, ha, ha, yay. And sometimes it's like, that's really funny. But if you're not in the right mood, it's never going to be.

It's never going to feel right. Yeah, and you're never in the mood for magic. And that's what we've always said about you. Yeah. I mean, we were at a restaurant in Temecula once. Yeah. And there was a guy just doing the rounds doing magic tricks for everyone.

Yeah. And I was like, this is fucking awesome. Yeah. And I did, it did change my life. There were traveling magicians at the Smosh 20th anniversary party. Oh,

and I was avoiding them. Yeah. No, I was trying to find them because I was like, well, I got to get one of these. But I didn't end up being able to track one down, but I did track down a traveling tarot woman.

And she told me not to settle. I didn't run into the tarot person. It was a big party, bro. Yeah, big. Yeah. It was pretty fun, though. I liked it. I have a hard time with tarot readers because one time I went to a party where I got my tarot read by a woman.

Oh, my God. And she was taking a long time for every person. Everyone. She was taking like 10, 15 minutes. Yeah. And then it got to me and she started and she literally was like, oh my God, fuck. I'm sorry. She was like, this is bad.

But good thing you're a light in this world. I have to go to the bathroom. And then she left. That's what a situation ship said to me before he ghosted me. So I feel like you're a light in this world is the thing you say before you leave and never see someone again. That's pretty good. Yeah. Pretty good.

So if you ever need to never see someone again, you know what phrase to say. Okay, so are you picking this damn bird? Or are you picking Edna for your true love? I'm fucking this thing? Yeah, it's your wife. So I don't know how you do your life. I don't know what you do. It's a white.

I'm trying to have an open mind, but like, it's a bird. Well, there's, then you're going to have. You're actually thinking too much into it. Yeah. think about just vibe. Think of it. I mean, we're not trying to coerce you into picking the bird. No, no, no.

Just think of it as like to have and to hold and to hold and to cherish insignia and health. I think that in that a beard of vulture, like what a cool partner. Right. Insigness and in health for richer and for poor. I think that was the right choice. Can we see how long they live? Yeah, how long do they live? Because you can always date around.

And how much money are they going to leave Spencer when they die. Oh, I think you're going to live a while. Can you look up how rich they are? And what's their insurance plan? Oh my God, over 30 years. 40 to 50 years in captivity? and marriage. We're in the long haul.

Actually, yeah, mating in captivity. Mating in captivity. Dating consists of 90% bone. That's crazy. Whoa. Marry her. Marry her. Yeah, okay, diet of 90% bone.

Now, that's interesting. They drop bones, large bones from great heights onto rocks to shatter them. Such great heights. Come down now. Okay, that's fucking awesome. Yeah. They have highly acidic stomachs.

Yeah, they can dissolve bones in their stomachs. 90%. bringing them around. It's like, oh, what does your partner do for work? It's like, get a load of this, bro. Eats 90% bone. Your bite of her mountain ecosystem. Yeah.

Yeah. Wow. Clean up crew. And she does have probably an acid reflux problem. Yep, for sure. She's on prilosec. She has a lot of pepsid. She's always seeing an E.

She's always saying, we don't know what to do about this. Just take more prilisek. That sounds personal. Okay. So we're going to go with hawk. Yeah. Bone eating hawk. Bone eating hawk.

Bone eating hawk toa. A bone-eating hawk or a waymo that cannot stop. Whoa. Have you guys been in one? No. I've never been in one, but I have seen them outside of my home. I live on a very thin street. Like I live on a very, you live on a not-waymo-friendly.

I live on a very like, I walk the line. Yeah. I live on a very narrow, thin street. It's not waymo friendly. It is not a waymo-friendly street. And the amount of waymoes that come down my street and get so fucking confused makes laugh so hard. I have heard they are.

manned. Yeah, I've heard that too. Yes. Like they are, it's like fully just like a person in the Philippines with a controller. Who is being paid less than they should. And they're doing like what little kids do with like a remote control car and being like, okay, get around this. Yeah, which is like, yeah, let's go, but pay them. For sure.

Like, but also like maybe just have a driver. Or have a little kid do it for free. Okay, okay, here we go. Waymo. That's child labor. Never mind. Yeah. Use remote assistance operators in the Philippines.

Okay, really good memory. Wouldn't it be easier to have a driver here? I think the outsourcing of labor is like a bigger problem than we can ever imagine. Like they're going to do everything they can to outsource jobs. Capitalism is bad. This is a brand new take. So are you going to marry this guy or what? It never stops.

How does he get in? What if you like got to meet your Waymo driver? I would actually like that. At the end, they're like, it was me and they have the hold of the controller. And then I'd be like, can you send me your Venmo? Yeah. So I can. Oh, yeah.

Like the Zoom pops up. Yeah. And it's like, hey, that's kind of cute. Yeah. And then what happens is a romantic comedy where somebody falls in love with their Waymo driver from the Philippines. And then they do a 90-day fiancé. They do a 90-day fiancé. And that's kind of an excellent movie.

Yeah. And then I take that to Homer. Yes. They go, here's your money. Yeah. And I go, thank you so much. I'm going to buy a ceiling. Yeah.

Oh, yeah. What is your ceiling status? Sealing I have now. Yeah. She got a new one. It's a glass ceiling. I didn't have. It is a glass ceiling.

And I'm just getting right there. What if your Waymo driver logs on like at the end of the trip and he's like, you were farting a lot back there. I would probably blame it on something else. Well, you know if you hook up in a Waymo, a voice comes over and tells you to stop. Is that true? Apparently. How'd you find that out? I've never been in a Waymo.

I found this out. I think from the internet, look up. Can you hook up? Can you hook up in a Waymo? No. Because you were like, I've been looking for a place. I'm like to hook up. No, it was.

Never have sex. It was that someone was, you can't. They have cameras. Yeah. And I don't know, maybe I saw like a Reddit post or something on my infinite time I spend on social media. But I, yeah. Yeah. But like, what's their line?

It's like, you know, you were keeping a little too long. Yeah. It's like hands. Make you stop. Yeah. What are you going to do? Above the pants, above the pants okay. Under the pants, not okay.

Yeah. Over the clothes is fine. Over the clothes is fine. Over the close is fine. I think like movie theater. Yeah. Over the clothes, you can go on a movie theater. They could drive off a bridge.

They could drive. Yeah, they start threatening. Yeah. I'm going to do it. I'm going to crash. Wait, what? Don't hook up or I'll crash. Oh, that's so crazy.

Okay, so my guess is you don't like this guy. No. You'd rather be with a hawk. But now I am thinking of like, there's got to be, looking at this Reddit, I'm like, there's got to be like a sex addicts. Anonymous. Where they're like, meeting in a way. I need to go, like, find crazy places.

And they're like, I need, like, what is the waymill logistics? Like, because I have seen threat. where it's like, it's like, how can I have sex in the airplane? Whoa. Like, how can I join the Mile High Club? It's people like breaking it down. And I'm like, y'all are like. And how?

And how? It's so much effort. It's like, I think part of it is just you, people are going to know. It's just like, who is going to be least likely to say something. Wow. And that sounds grimy. No, no, it's like, I don't want to make someone else witness my sex and be like, don't say anything.

Like, that feels like predatory. It's absolutely like a. gross. It's like it's not, it's just like, it feels like rude to do. We love we love kink, but we don't love kink, but we don't love kink when it's not done consensually or correctly or respectfully. It's like at the expense of

like the passengers. I'm like buddy. Yeah. We're all stuck on the same plane. Yeah. That's tough. Yeah. So, so. Plain sex addict. So, so. I'm a sex addict and I can do it in the air. That sucks so much. Okay, so we're singing with a bird. Or,

have you ever seen a hagfish? I don't think so. Okay, let's see the hagfish. What was the fish I fell in love with? Oh, God. Not this fish. I did not fall in love with this fish. So this isn't a hagfish.

Oh, my God. Is it a fish? Yeah, it's a fish. It's hagfishes and slime by Douglas Fudge. Is what this says. Douglas Fudge. Chapman University. Crazy full.

Okay, wait. Would you rather date Hagfishes and slime or Douglas Fudge? His name Douglas Fudge. If your name is Douglas Fudge, you kind of have to go into studying hagfish and slime. Yeah, I mean, there's only... Yeah, you're... God damn.

The hagfish is also the scientific name is a mixony, which kind of looks like the word minks. Yeah, sexy, sexy hagfish. This is a... Girlfish or dessert dish. That's a good game. That's good.

I would be chew it on this thing. Yeah. Which is kind of what you would do in dating. Yeah. I would be holding it like this. And chewing it? No, just like kind of this far away, but going like, whoa, that's crazy.

Yeah. It looks like one of those toys that like, you know, it was... The ones that... Yeah. I don't know what you would like... The tubes of flashlight. No. They look like, yeah.

Everyone always jokes about fucking those. They're like the tubes. People joke about fucking a flashlight? No, these tubes. What it's hard. I just fuck it. Yeah. Yeah, they're like water tubes of gushy water.

Put your junk inside. You can. Getting a flashlight is a bit is fun. Yeah. Um, hagfish... This flashlight's a bit. It was just a bit. This hagfish to me looks like.

like the leftover skin of a snake? Yeah, like post-molting. Post-multing? Or like maybe if like if one day people... It's a beautiful one, the pink one. Penises became like evolution-wise. They were able to circumcise themselves by their foreskin falls off in kind of the way

that a snake's skin would come on. Or if they circumcise themselves. That would be that. If they circumcise themselves, but they just cut off the human part and the penis and they kept the foreskin. And that was the creature. Whoever's circumcising themselves in the...

In the future? The future circumsists. You like the hagfish or no? Oh, bro, it's Coyote Peterson. Its mouth is like a catfish. Whoa, it's fast. It's actually way faster than it's anticipated. Coyote Peterson's whole bit is just like getting bit by animals.

I swear to God. Have you guys ever watched videos of this guy? No, I haven't. What's the deal? Wait, is he the guy that boops animals? No, no. Okay, because that guy. This guy predates the booper who's like out with the fucking.

Crazy. Yeah. That's a crazy person. This guy, he's like, oh, I'm going to find this like crazy animal and I'm going to like let it sting me or bite me. He has a show. Yeah, he just said I'm about to enter the bite zone with the hag. And he has a show where he like ranks how bad it hurts or is that a different guy that I think it might be this guy.

That's such a recipe for getting killed. What are we doing here? Well, it's like, you know, Pete Davidson used to say that he would get tattoos instead of self-harm. Aching his ass. Sure. Because he was like, it's the same vibe, but like it's not as destructive and it's artistic. And I feel like that's this guy.

Okay, I love him This is like some tremor shit Yeah I got up at my finger You don't have to So you want to fuck it I don't But I know this is about me

There's something like it's like geiger-esque This is like some alien This is like Prometheus Do you guys ever see Prometheus? Oh sure sure sure sure This looks like the little cobra thing That comes out of the I know this

Out of the woman's tummy Yeah What's the thing where It comes out of her tummy tum She gets pregnant Yeah it lays eggs or whatever in her Yeah She get pegnot from it.

It lays eggs and tummy. Pegna? Pregnott. Oh, yeah. Pregnant. Gregnant. Yes. Okay, yeah.

No, I think it's kind of gorgeous, but that's just me. Yeah, okay, so is it that versus the hawk or that versus the waymo? I'm going back to the hawk. Yeah, the hawk's on my shoulder. I think that's fair. I think that's fair. I think that's a picture of life for us. Have you seen the penis snake?

Wait, was that not the penis snake? No, that's the hagfish, Olivia. Have you guys ever seen like eels? Like, eels that come up? Have I seen eels that come up? There's a lot of eels coming up right now in the rap scene. I'm using the eels that are coming up. Eels will, like, come up to the surface and, like, kind of, like, feed off, like, stuff, like, right, like, grass.

Like, flotsam and jepts them. Yeah. Like, then they sing and dance and they take your boss takes your soul. Don't miss the devil wears prodig too in theaters. Meryl Streep. Anne Hathaway, Emily Blunt, and Stanley Tucci are back. In light of the recent scandal, I'm here to restore your credibility. I did not hire you.

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Get tickets now. The devil wears prodig too. Indeed is May 1st. Directed by David Frankel. The symptoms. Flots them and the Jetsons. Flotsam and the Jetsons. Wait.

Eels seeming them up to the grass? Yeah, look. Eels that come up. Juvenile climbing up street for garseils emerging from Sandy Burroughs. Okay, these eels are on their come up. These glass eels are coming up. These glass eels on their coming up. Everything's coming up eel.

Yeah. Well, it looks like everything is coming up eel. Wow. Okay, Elver's young friends. They climb wet vertical obstacles. Me too. How I'm trying to be, yeah. No, that's how I'm trying to be in 2026.

Hold on. You'll surface to breathe air. Oh, that's fucking crazy. I love us taking all this Google AI shit as like absolutely. Yeah, yeah. Wow. No, no, I know for everything about you. That.

Wow, that's actually crazy. Okay, that's gorgeous. Sorry, what's the penis snake? I don't know, look it up. I don't know. Just let's see a penis. There was this, this. Oh, yeah.

Is that not a worm? No, that's a penis snake. Is that the penis worm you showed me or is that a different penis one? Different worm. Oh, my God. I think. There was this, this. It's an amphibian.

Just as amphibian. This album of weird penises that I found on. Reddit one time. It was like 20 pictures of just it was just like on it was just like a thread of like 20 of the weirdest penises. I mean I would click on that for sure. And it was legitimately one of the funniest things like I have ever seen it. It would kind of be like our litmus test for like hey like

do you want to see this photo thread of 20? Yeah. Goofy like and they're not like disgusting it's just like What the fuck is that like it's wearing a suit? No it's so it would be like the head would be like It would be like an umbrella. Whoa. It would just be like monstrosities. Like, but they're not like, it was just funny.

It was just funny. It was just like, that's a unique body part and no one else has that. Like one would be like out and then it would be like a 90 degree angle. And it's just like. And it's like what is that person's life like? And I don't know. Unless they're a bad person, in which case I hope it's bad. Oh, absolutely.

No, that's, I mean, like, yeah. Penises can be all shapes sizes colors. I think they really can. I think so. Do you guys? And so can vaginas, to be clear. Yeah, they can be all of them. To be absolutely.

To be absolutely clear. But I don't know what a vagina snake looks like. Do you know, have you seen the cliff where someone in a deposition tells Jeffrey Epstein? Like they're being like, oh, someone said that you have like a weird lemon shaped penis and he gets so mad he gets up and leaves. I would too. Well, it's like. Yeah, it's awesome. It's like if you don't, you wouldn't get mad and get mad.

Yeah, it's true. You'd be like, what? So do snakes hear you is what people ask. Okay. That's terrible. This snake, it hears you. This snake is actually called a what? What is this snake called?

I'm not saying that. Atrettochanoa. Atratocanoa. It's a Brazilian rainforest bro. They have all kinds of weird shit in the Amazon. Yeah. Rediscovered by engineers. They're like, oh, what the fuck?

Yeah. So this snake is kind of on its come up as well. It's coming up. And it's also like very wrinkly, which is kind of awesome. I'm so afraid of it. And you know what they say about the wrinkles. The more wrinkles you have, the smarter you are. Really?

In your brain. Oh, in your brain. Yeah. I thought you meant like... I love that. Like, there was like the air on the internet where it was like that was kind of the meta. Like the joke, it was like, oh, smooth brain. Like no wrinkles on my brain.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. So this is like a pretty smart penis snake. If it's a brain, yeah. Because it's covered in wrinkles. Yeah, if it's penis is its brain and that's also its body, then it's a genius. Like it looks like it was put in a carry-on bag and now it has to like come a part. Like it was like really smushed in there. Because look at it all of its wrinkles. It needs to be like ironed. Yeah. It looks like you left your penis in the sink for too long. It does look like

and that is what it looks like when I do that. I do like it's dumb little face though. Like it is like the perfect hybrid between the head of a penis and like the head of a snake. Yeah. Like a silly cartoon snake. Like not even a real snake. I kind of think it's cute. I do too. I don't know. Do you want it? I don't. I'm sticking with the beard of vulture. Yeah. Okay. The beard-eating hawk. You don't want the Waymo at all. Fuck the Waymo. Okay.

And then the last one is the bearded hawk or Courtney Freaking Miller. Obviously. What was the last time Shane did Courtney Freaking Miller? I don't know. I think I'm... Courtney Freaking Miller. Not Courtney Miller. That's my buddy's wife.

Yeah, no. No, that's our friend Courtney. That's Courtney freaking. Yeah, there you go. Yeah. This is a, like, I know, I don't want to speak too much for Shane, but like, I don't want to speak too much for Shane. but like I know this character was semi-retired because it is exhausting.

I'm sure. That's fair. Because he just has to like. Oh, everything is screamed. Like, you know, that's the, you know, we always do like our chosen character. Yeah. I think about the chosen is so, I don't want to be like it's so easy. Well, you do a very spectacular chosen.

And yeah, you're famous for doing a perfect chosen. Thank you. But it's like to me chosen, it's like down here. Like you are fully just like, it's like almost the less you do the better. There are certain characters. where it's like I have to be up here the whole time. And I cannot imagine doing that. Like if you're not in the mood,

like imagine you're having a bad day. And they're like, oh, Courtney Freakin' Miller, like get out there. I'd be like, no, dude. No, not at all. That's where I think, you know, YouTube, not to get too existential, but like, you know, we're existential.

Smosh or like, you know, the internet in general has kind of changed where it does encourage authenticity is a big word. But, you know, being more like, almost like yourself. Yeah, yeah. Yourself? Yourself, anyone?

Because everyone else is already taken, I heard. Yeah, I think there is definitely like a, a, I think as society and as the phones have made individual people lonelier and lonelier, there is a craving for human connection and authenticity. Yeah. Even when you're doing a bit or a sketch, if you can tell something's more real for, like, people are drawn towards that. No, like, and to me, I can, I feel like I can tell when people are pushing.

Like, on the toilet. Like, comedically. Yeah, or in the toilet. Like when they're in the toilet and you just hear them. Yeah, and I can hear. Yeah. That was the other part of that podcast. Yeah, we're talking about hemorrhoids.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, sure. Yeah. That was like the one I selected to watch. Yeah, that one was like, it was like hemorrhoids. It was the surgery, you know, the put, like, you know, I was like, damn. Yeah, that one was a, that one was a dirty episode. Dirty.

Dirty, dirty episode. Yeah, so out of that or the hawk, just for your true love. And I think this is the last one, you know. Yeah. You know, I'm taking that wig off and I'm going to be like, it's you, Shane. Right. And you're picking that? I know it's you.

Yeah, I'm picking that. So just regular Shane. Just regular Shane. Okay, regular Shane top. I won the game. Sorry, quick. I found a way. I found a way.

It happened. She, at the best thing I can see about court is she would get it. Yeah. I think, like, you know, no one's a bigger fan of Shane than, than court. Yeah. And it's like, besides me.

Right, of course. Right, right, right, right, right. That was that. Music. That was that. And music is cut. Oh my God.

That was awful. I'll never do that again. Okay, that's fine. Oh. Closed on all these, out of all these tabs. Yeah, all those closed.

Tabs of shame. So you know about, you know a lot about video games. Oh my God, yeah. Yeah. And we know actually nothing about video games. So that's something interesting. Do you really know, like actually nothing like?

Very little. Well, I know, like, day dudes? I know about Hayday dudes. I dated one... Hayday? Yeah. I dated two video game guys.

I'll show you my game. And what was that like? I... Oh, is Hayday one of like... It's like a mobile farming game? It's like Farm... Okay, yeah. Yeah.

This is my game. I know Nintendo. It's Farm Bill, okay. It's not Farmville. But it's Farmville adjacent. It's Hayday. It's up Bell games. What else are...

I dated one video game guy who liked the video game where the girl hears voices and runs around the forest and has the black, like, like, paint on her eyes. Oh, uh, Hellblade. Yeah. And then I've, oh my God. Well, I watched someone play the entire Last of Us series of games, which was. Did you watch both? Yeah. And the second one gave me a nervous break. It made it. The second one ruined my life and I refused to watch it as of the show. The second one makes the first one look like like a kid's story. The second one make me, I literally was like, it sent me into an actual depression. It's, it's, have you, have you, have you, are you familiar with the, it's, I know what happens because of, yeah, you've told me. Because I, because I was in a real depression. It's, it's, it is such a visceral, like, you know, I, I've never encountered, like, you know, so many stories or movies and stuff do that kind of like, oh, like revenge, like, it's bad if you like keep doing it. This I have never seen something where it's like, you do something as like a protagonist. Yeah. Like you, you, you kill all these people. And all these dogs. Yeah. And you're like, dude, like, yeah, I'm playing a video. I'm doing this. And then you go to the other side. You're like, oh my God. Those were all like,

yeah, the most, not the most normal people, but it's like, oh, truly. Yeah, everyone's just the same level of person.

It's just like, oh, you're all just doing you. And it's like, no, I'm gonna, like, it's,

yeah. And the way it ended for me was just like, oh, so you're trying to get me to K my S? Yeah. You know, like,

oh, okay. So she can't even, like, spoiler alert, so she can't even play the guitar and that's her one link. And so she could have.

She could have. She could have learned. If she could have. Take it with you or I'm going to literally go into a three-month long. She gets these two fingers bitten off. And like the epilogue of the game is her picking up the guitar that she was given by her mentor. And she like fails to play it. And I'm like, okay, like you could have you wanted.

You could learn. Like people have done like people play guitar with like one hand. And she leaves it behind and is like well. And it's like I'm so mad. And I'm so mad about it. And then I also know about Legend of Zelda. and I know about Mario, but that's it. Legend of Zelda, Mario, those are good ones.

Yeah, but those are like normal ones, right? Those are like... Did you guys see the new Mario movie? No. Well, the first one? The first one, and the new ones just... I didn't see it, but I am in love of Charlie Day. Luigi.

Yeah. I know Tetris. Tegro's Tetris. All kinds of shapes in that one. Wow, really, nothing. Really, very little. Very little. Very little. So what we were hoping we could do is that you could tell Cassem to look up a certain...

I would say just look up like most famous video game characters, like on Google images, and we'll just click a couple. Yeah. I'll be like, who is this. You pick, and then we'll guess who it is based on our knowledge, which is nothing. Yeah. Right. I mean, because Mario's going to be number one. Absolutely.

Who's, like, what can't he know that one? I know him. I know him. He's Italian. Okay. Yeah, yeah. Let's go through these. Okay.

Well, I know. But I don't know what the name of the last guy. Pac-Man. Oh, that's Pac-Man? Yeah. Yeah. Oh, why is he 3D? Blue is Sonic the Hedgehog.

Yes. That's Donkey Kong. Yeah, I know these. Okay, so we know these. I mean, hey, let's go left to right, starting at the top row. I mean, there you go. Okay, that's Luigi Mangione. Yeah.

That's Luigi. And then the next one is a Pokemon, but I don't know what's heard of it. Charzard? That's Chargard. Yeah. And then that is. I don't trust that guy. That guy's, I mean, ACAB. The game is Halo.

Oh, so he's a murderer. He is a murderer. That's, his name is. Does he have a name? Yeah, Mr. He's got a couple name. Like, he has a, like, literal. name, but like everyone calls him Master Chief.

Oh, fuck. Which is like his military title, but his actual name is John. I was going to guess Mr. Fist. Mr. Fist feels like a sick name. Yeah, it's at least a good name. And then do you know what this character is after that? It looks phallic. That's Dildo.

Did you guys see the Minecraft movie? No. Okay, so that is a creeper for Minecraft. A creeper. Creeper. Wow. Yeah, so they hiss and then they explode. And is it like known to be phallic?

It's supposed to be valic? I mean, now that you're saying it, like his name is Dildon. Yeah, like I see the penis and the balls. But you've seen it before, right? I've seen it. I think they're like the way they cut, like literally it is the way they move and handle themselves in the game. Like to me, I associate them so much like their entire body exploding.

It's hard to, it's hard to like see the penis in that. Well, yeah, unless you've seen a penis explode. It's like when you, you hear them more than you see them because you hear like a distinct hissing like a fuse going. off. So like to me, that's like, you know, the bit where it's like images you can hear. Wow. It's like to me, it's like if anyone who plays Minecraft, like you hear that sound and it like triggers something in you. Wow. It's like a, it's truly like a panic button. Wow. And it's funny because it's like, you know, you picture Minecraft. Like I don't know what you guys think. Yeah, I picture it being like kids building a house. Yeah. It's little kids, right? It's a lot of little kids. It's a lot of little kids. It's a lot of little kids. It's a lot of little kids. I've

Babysad kids who are like little kids. Yeah, they love it. Minecraft. Yeah. Yeah. Uppies. Upies, Uppies. They say upies, upies, Muppies.

And then there are some adults that are like upies Uppies, Minecraft. Yeah. And so, and then they hide things in it? Don't they hide songs? I don't know. Do they hide songs in Minecraft? No, isn't it a thing? Wait, you guys, no, I'm serious.

In Minecraft, they hide. Do they hide songs? No, in Minecraft, they hire. Eels are coming up? Eels are coming up. Does his eels come up in Minecraft? Does eels come up in Minecraft? I think in Minecraft they hide leaks of songs.

Oh, like. I don't think so. But that's a good guess. What am I thinking? I don't know, but I love it. Fortnite? Yeah, Fortnite. No has Sabrina Carpenter in it.

Wasn't there a thing where Northwest the child found a leak of something in Minecraft? I don't know. I'm trying to think of like. What on earth I could be thinking of? Me too. Music in Minecraft. Okay, the guy with the sword from Minecraft, that's Greg. Don't hide anything in it?

I don't know how they could hide. So everyone's Minecraft world, like when you start a, so you boot the game up, and then you click either like generate world where it will make a like randomly generated world. Oh, that's fun. And nobody's is the same. Oh, that's fun. Or you can like choose somebody else's world that they have already generated, but all the

worlds are essentially like generated. So no one is like building out these worlds to like hide stuff. Yeah, you're building a house in a world. These are, I think we've done actually pretty well on this. You want to go down a tier? A more niche tier. Yeah, let's do tier. Oh, hi, I remember these guys.

Oh, yeah. I don't know who any of these are. That's Mue 2. Yeah. You might know Gen 1 Pokemon. I do know Gen 1 Pokemon. There you go. Yeah, that's Muteu.

Yeah, that's the Me Too movement. Yeah, that's the Me Too movement. Yeah, he got Me Too. Yeah, he got Me Too. He got Me Too. He got Me Too really bad. That's not good. I do know that.

Okay, that guy, I don't know him. The second guy. somebody draw that like right before this? So that's somebody from, it's called... De Los Moritos game? Yeah. Have you ever heard of Undertale? No.

Is it a Diadillos Moritos game? No, there is one of those, though. Because he looks like a little Dioz... No, he absolutely does. I think his name is Sands, though. Sands? Like, you know, a flunt. Like without?

Yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Oh, okay. And then the third one, the third one you might know. Oh, my God. That's like, I know he has a name. He's in Super Smash Brothers.

Yeah, and his name is, oh my God. It's, I actually. I know who this one is. Billy Bob Thornton. Yeah, his name's Billy Bob Thornton. Wait, that's his... Doesn't he looks kind of like Billy Bob Thornton? Sydney, I got it right.

No, I think I got it right. He looks like Billy Bob Thornton. Wait, that's such a good point. Landfall. So that is Solid Snake? Solid Snake? Is there a solid snake? Is there a...

There's a many snakes. There's liquid and gas snake. There is liquid snake. There is naked snake. Is he really naked? He is not naked. That's stupid that. It's...

Talk about the most convoluted franchise of all time. Yeah. And what franchise is this? Metal Gear Solid. What is that? Exactly. Do you know this next person? He was one of the people I was thinking about showing you guys.

He's a bird with no leg. He's redacted. He's redacted on the list. He's a jester bird with the list. His name is Rayman. Rayman. Yeah, he's like an old, like he was like kind of like a Mario Peer back in the day. Really?

They worked together. They worked together. Yeah, it was just like, you know, it was like kind of Mario Jason where like he was in the platformer games where it's like, you know, you run from side to side. You pick up shit. Oh, wow. He doesn't even look like he'd be from the Mario. He looks like a serial mascot. Yeah, he's just from like games like Mario.

Oh, sure, sure, sure. He was like Mario, Sonic Ray Man. There was like all kinds of those. He looks like a serial mascot that got canceled for doing something that was like off color. Like for like, like his whole thing was violence or his whole thing was like stopping. Has the serial mascot ever been canceled? Um, yes, the noid. Yeah, the noid.

Well, that's a pizza mascot, but still. The noid was canceled for being terrifying. I'm scary. Yeah. The noid is an old, I think pizza. Dominoes. Domino's mascot that got that got pulled for being terrifying. And I think someone, I think encouraging someone to do some sort of a crime, but I forget which. The noid told me. The noid told me to do it.

Then that's what I always say when I get arrested. The noid told me to do it. Have you guys ever had, did you guys watch the Flintstones? Lusely, but not aggressively. Well, you know, the one that the daughter's name is Pebbles. Yes. And the cereal is fruity Pebbles. And I'm like, makes you think. Okay, Queen. Oh, it's like her body. I don't know. It's like she's, she's, she's, She's queer. And I love that for her. But it's just something I was thinking about the other day because I was like talking. So we eat.

So we eat her? We eat her. Yeah. And that's like a Christ like like a it is a Eucharist. It's a Christ. What is the Eucharist? A communion wafer? That's the, what's a Eucharist?

Eucharist. Youchrist? Are you Chris? Are you Chris? Wait, are you Chrising right now? No, I'm Jew. Eucharist also in his Holy Communion, Lord's Supper is the sacrament representing the blood. Okay.

You were right. Like they do like, because I grew up. Catholic and Eucharist was like a they would just kind of throw words out and like the Eucharist would be in there and I'd be like you know you're not sure what fucking half that shit means and you're just like yeah yeah yeah sure it's a wafer that's the way it looks like wafer and one I think Eucharist is like the whole process like I am doing I'm doing the Eucharist right now oh I'm so eucharistic I'm yeah I'm Eucharist pilled yeah I'm Eucharist pilled okay um well I I feel like we've learned so much about about video game characters.

Yeah. And we learned and we guessed them all correctly. Do you guys have like a favorite one? Yeah, I like the one with no legs. Uh, no arms. Rayman? Yeah. I don't like that one.

Okay. I can't fuck with that. Okay. I should have made y'all do like a, uh, a this or that with video game. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And the answer is yes.

I'd, I'd fuck liquid snake just to see what that's like. Snake is sexy. And like, he's like he's caked up. Like he's kicked up. He's kicked up? Yeah. Yeah. of that. Well, we have a topic that we'd like to quiz you on, and we don't know if you know much about this topic, but we sure do. And this topic is niche Y2K dating shows. Niche Y2K

dating shows. Yeah, like cursed Y2K dating shows that shouldn't exist. They're actually the only ones that should exist. And characters from that. And so you'll tell us who you think this person is, and then we'll tell you if you're right. Stay in a chair. I'll see what you pulled, because I did my time in the VH1 months. I loved VH1. I'm hoping you totally knock it out of the pop. Okay, who's this? Oof.

He looks like a security. But is that like his character? Like is he like a character in a reality show? Is he from like I mean he might have been and I did not watch making the band. But like making the band adjacent like that era where you know, he's like being in to do stuff on behalf of like a celebrity or a star. I will say this show is pre-9-11. Pre-9-11, okay.

Does that help? I don't know, does it? No, pre-9-11, like, I would not have been watching any of this stuff. Yeah. So. I was in school. Right. So this is the locksmith from the show Chains of Love.

Where they lock a person up to multiple people to see who they want to date, and they lock them up for 24 hours to their hands. in. And then when the locksmith shows up, they get to set someone free and say, I don't want to date this person. So they're chained to five different potential suitors. And then every time this guy shows up, he takes one suitor away. That's like as fuck. Yeah, it's awesome. And then so that's him. And so, and so, and he never talks. That doesn't feel that unethical. No, he's fine. Everyone consents to it. And then he drives the person home. Silent. Silent. And they're the idea. Like, what's better than like, someone who shows up doesn't say anything like, does it, like does something and then leaves? Like, that's so funny. unlocks your handcuffs and takes you away. Love it. Love it's a power move. It is. The locksmith, that's a great character name too.

He should be a video game character. Yeah. Okay. Let's see the next one. Okay. You know what this is. Is this from like, so I think this is a little earlier than my time. Like all this like, because I was, we tried to pick really niche.

I was watching like a shot at love with tequila. Of course. It's all in the same world. It's all in the same. So this is related to one of those shows. This looks like like road rules or something like that to me. Which show is this? Or next or something like that.

Here's the hint. I will give you. Flavor of love. This is a spinoff of a spinoff of a spinoff. Jesus Christ. Yeah, like, based on your reaction, I'm guessing it's not right. But I'm going to say like road rules. Yeah.

So this is Frank the Entertainer from Frank the Entertainer, a basement affair. I do. That name is ringing a huge bell for me. So there was flavor of love. And then New York was. on she was a contestant on flavor of love. She got her own spin off. I love New York. This guy was on I love New York. His whole thing was I'm a singer and I live in my parents' basement. And then he got a dating show that was a budget of maybe $11. And it took place in his mother's and father's basement.

Yeah. It's kind of the Viva Alabama. Yeah. And all of the contestants live in his parents' house during the shoot. And he has his own theme song that he sings and it starts with him going, I'm living with my parents In New York City, I'm 31. That's sick as fuck. Yeah, it's actually awesome. You can find it on YouTube. Yeah, the whole season's up on YouTube. It's on YouTube.

I'll say his Instagram is private, but you can request to follow, and he will accept you. Yeah, you follow him. He accepted you. How is it? RIP, your dad. Yeah. Sorry about your dad. No, and love his dad.

Oh, his dad died? His dad is... Found out from Instagram. His dad's a great part of the show. His dad is a great part of the show. RIP. Yeah. Anyway.

Okay. That's Daphney. from Scooby-Dow. Boom, that's Daphne. Okay, so this is kind of a cheat one because it's from the same show. This is Annie from Frank, The Entertainer, a Basement Affair. What's special about her is she was a performance artist, and she did this show as a bit. Oh, that's awesome.

It's so awesome. And she made it pretty far. She made it way far. And she was, like, had, like, the galaxy leggings all the time. And she had this, like, Kristen Shawl voice. And she would be like, I think, I don't know. 2000s? Yeah, yeah.

Galaxy tights. That's like. Yeah. This turn of the 2010s. Maybe it was 2010s. She, but she's like, I'm making things out of trash because trash is beautiful. And he's like, great. And she stays for so long.

But like, love her. Yeah. She feels charming. I love her. I'm charmed by her. She's my favorite contestant, hands down. Okay. She's my winner.

Yeah. Of course. Now, this is our last one. And God, do I love her. Oh. God damn. I'm going to miss all these. Well, it's because we picked really hard.

Yeah. I mean, that like that, that backdrop, this like whatever camera that has shot on, it looks such like a specific era for me. Yeah, you could guess it is one of those of love shows. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Or you could just guess her, her name. Her name?

Yeah. Just throw out a name. Just throw out a name. Any name in the world. It's one of those. Just throw out something. It's one of those shows where they give the contestants nickname. Yeah.

So her name might be like Chicago or something. It could be exactly. Well, what did you just say? Chicago. What was the whole sentence? Her name could be like Chicago or something. You got it. Her name is something. Is it really?

Yeah, her nickname is something. Yeah, it's something. And now something really sits in my mind kind of constantly. Yeah, something is the best character on flavor of love. Because she was on flavor of love. She was on flavor of love. And she was known for walking up the stairs, taking a shit on the stairs, and not getting eliminated. did. She made it one more elimination round after she shot on the stairs.

I feel like Flav of Flav was like seen past that kind of stuff. Yeah, he really was. Like he was not. It's awesome. Like the clip, yeah. His thing was he was like, what I love about her, she's so real for doing it. And then you cut to her and she was like, listen, I had to shit on the stairs. And so I shot on the stairs.

He approaches her while she's in the bathroom and he's like, are you okay? And I'm like, maybe Flavor, Flav is a good guy. Last, last thing I will say that one podcast I watch of y'all is. y'all were talking about last time you shit your pants and you talked about how you almost shit your pants twice in one week yes and we think that was the black mold yes yes yes yes yes yes yes the black mold that makes you shake your pants in public forget the things I say here because I have a goldfish brain right I am no I do the same thing like there was a uh um I do the same like bit to like fully in two separate episodes about that's so funny oh um like where you pee for like you know because boxers have like a hole in the front

Right. Yes. And I and I talk about that I talked about that like two full episodes in a row of like different shows. And it's like it was like you know because like standups will do like the same bit. But for me like it just kind of organically came up twice. And I say this exact fucking same thing. Sometimes you just get excited about something and you're like, well like, like, well, guys, how about this? And then everyone's like we know. Yeah. I do have an extremely like finite amount of like perspectives and things to say. I mean, I've got to say I've probably talked about something from a flavor of love multiple times. this show. Yeah, I mean, because I love her so much. Yeah, something is amazing. Get her on the pod. Where are you something? Yeah, something. If something, if you're still out there, please get on the pod and we love you. What do you mean if you're still out there? I don't know. I mean, she died? I hope not. She died in that accident that killed Frank the entertainer's father. Yes, yes. Too soon. Too soon. I think it happened a while ago. Okay, then, then too soon. Um, uh, I think we've wasted so much of your time. Do you love it? This is fun. I love coming on anywhere to talk.

You are just lovely. Thank you guys. I can't believe you guys found all those edits of me. Well, they were served to us. It's upsetting. And that's so, that really is like I don't want to under-emphasize how crazy and funny that is. Yeah. It is wild.

It happens more often than you would think. Yeah. Like who else in my life is seeing these and just like scrolls? Yeah, just people your friends with who follow you because they're your friend. It's like, yeah, how many people are just not saying anything? I get a lot of Angela edits. I get a lot of like. Like here's like a bunch of shots of Angela singing, but we don't see, we don't actually hear it because there's a song over it.

Angel will clock. Yeah. When something will be used for something like that. I don't want to put her business out, but like, you know, we'll do those like those like singing streams and she'll be like, I like, she won't like say it. But like, no, she'll know. She'll know. I think she knows like, oh, this is like. This is clippable.

And I think that's where, you know, what makes her next level is just kind of understanding what the camera sees. camera sees kind of in a way. Because for me, I mean, the way I'm able to best perform is like what I'm not thinking about anything. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Talking to people in the room. But for her, you know, I think she just, she's smart. She's goaded.

That's kind of psychic. And what a goaded goat. That's kind of psychic. She is good. She's such a goat that her pupils are horizontal and she sees in panorama. Spencer, thank you for being here. If you want to see early episodes. Uncut, unconsensured, extended.

And so many little extras and weird goodies. and bad things as well. Go to our Patreon. Check it out and go to it. We do movie nights. We do all sorts of things. It's very fun. We make fan fictions.

And we got to read. Someone wrote a fan fiction for us and we have to do a live reading of it. Oh, fuck yeah. And you guys actually watch a movie. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We're actually going to do one after this. What are you going to watch?

We're going to watch Birdemic. Oh, fuck, yeah. Yeah. Very exciting. So get over there. And if not, no worries. That's okay. We'll see you next Tuesday.

Bye. Bye.