Syd & Olivia Talk Sh*t - SYD SHOCKS OLIVIA

Episode Date: December 3, 2024

In this SURPRISE episode of Syd & Olivia Talk Sh*t, Syd shocks Olivia with a series of segments designed for the one and only Olivia Sophia DeLaurentis. Comment who should be voted off the Love Island fantasy bracket below!! @sydandolivia on all socials :) Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

garbage. We're going to spew garbage from our face holes today. From our vile violets. From our vial holes. Um, uh, we're going to spew garbage from our vile holes. Welcome guys. Today we're going to spew some garbage from our vial holes. And we're going to start with a love island update. Oh, you've got a love island update. Whoa, you're probably thinking, uh, what other... It's a love island update. So let's, this is the Sidna libya, Love Island fantasy bracket, cue music. Thank you, especially that last part. So the last thing we remember,

is, you know, they had just played a game. Yeah, they had just played the game where they have to vomit into each other's mouths. Which is a real game on the line. That's the real Love Island. Like, Love Island, like, that is every third game. Yeah, they always do that. They always spit shit into each other's mouths. It's disgusting. It's a really race of awfulness. Absolutely disgusting. And this time, obviously there are no winners.

There's no winners when you have to vomit into each other's mouths. But two people did win a date. Oh, shit! And it was Tungus and the Rainbow Fish. Wow. So let's see how that date is going. Tombgis and the Rainbow Fish are outside of the villa. Two chairs with a lemon.

If they are sitting at two chairs with a little lemon in between them, they are simply on the driveway of the villa. And let's see what they're talking about. Tombgis is saying, Yeah, I just feel like on the outside, everybody kind of mistakes me for like a bad boy, and I'm not a bad boy. And then the Rainbow Fish is like,

Oh, help me. Because obviously the rainbow fish... Need water. Needs water. Tumgis squirts some lemon juice on the rainbow fish, which obviously doesn't help. It burns, but it was a nice gesture. The rainbow fish goes,

Oh, thank you. Tungis says, I just feel like we have so much in common. The rainbow fish says, Yes, everyone is always trying to take my scales. Tungis is like, no, everyone's always trying to take. your scales on the outside because of your beautiful scales and on the outside

everybody's trying to take my beard because me beard is made of cheat toes and the rest of me body is made of snacks people are trying to but is loose chips me foopat is loose chips and people are always trying to take me fooper on the outside me knees are conscious babe and the rainbow fish is like my body about that's like a beautiful date oh they're bonding they're bonding i feel like i didn't even see it for them but maybe they're like actually a good couple. And just when you think, like, this date couldn't get any better. There's a fireworks show above the villa.

Yeah. They both watch it. The fireworks spell out things like, give the rainbow fish some water. Yeah. And, but it's, unfortunately, the middle of the day, so you can't see the fireworks that well. You can't see them that well. You can see them that well. But they can hear really loud music, or sorry, cut that.

Yeah. But they can hear really loud songs. But they can hear really lot. insanity that's the great season this is like I'm titles for our next show they're in your eyes in your eyes and I see through in your eyes but they can hear really loud sounds that sound like bombs yeah and they both have PTSD from war so they're both freaking out

which brings them closer together oh my god that's so true and they lean in for their first kiss oh my god it's so wet it's so wet because of tumius Tungus, his mouth is salivating Diet Coke. Yeah. Because all of his saliva is made of Diet Coke. Yes, so he pours Diet Coke into the gills of the rainbow fish. And it's not perfect, but it's better than nothing. It is better than nothing.

And the rainbow fish is like, and it's so beautiful. It's so beautiful. Okay, back in the villa, though. Back in the villa. Back in the villa. Back in the villa. Horace Kjunia's brainworm was having a conversation with Scrappy-Doo.

So Scrappy-Doo, you know, obviously bursting out of Mr. Bean's chest, has pulled RFK Jr.'s brainworm aside. For a chat. For a chat. Because he's like, hey, let me at him, let me ask him. Yeah, yeah. Why on earth were you so ready to go with the new bombshell chat, TBT, when I put all my eggs in your basket, let me add him?

Right, right, right. And then, of course, like, RFK Jr's brainworm would be like, Oh, my God, it's not, oh, it's not, why it looks like, You're such a crazy bird. You're such a crazy bird. It's just early days. It's just early days. Like, you want me thinking of it?

Oh, it's crazy then. Like, that's kind of more what he does. Yep. And then. But then who comes in to help Scrappy. To stick up for Scrappy Do. Her girl. It is the burning pile of furniture.

And she's like, oh, listen to you. Like, I saw what she did because I was doing the same thing. I was chatting with chat GBT. And if you're going to do that, at least. Oh, not. I think you have to like a man, like be a man, be a mom, has some accountability. Have some balls. Have some balls, like a man.

Yeah. Um, and so that's crazy. And she's like burning. She is fuming. She's absolutely fuming. She's absolutely fuming bides. I'm absolutely fuming by. She's multiple chairs and a cat, uh, climber thing.

Um, on fire. And she's freaking out. Oh, and then just like real quick cut to Glenn Close and chat GBT. And Glenn Close is like, where are the fuck am I? Where am I? And chat GBT is like, you are on. Sid and Olivia's Love Island fan fiction bracket. And it is early days.

And that explains a lot, but Glenn Close's not having it. She's still freaking out. Now, now, you as the audience have to help us out. Next episode of Love Island, someone is going to be dumped. Voted off the island. From the island. So you guys have to vote.

Who will it be? Who will it be? Comment, DM us, do whatever the fuck. RFK Jr.'s brainworm? Yep. Scrappy-Doo. Mm-hmm. Glenn Close.

The burning pile of furniture. Chat GBT, GBT, Tungis, or the Rainbow Fish. Who's it going to be, guys? Who's it going to be? It's up to the audience now. It's up to the public. It's up to the public. Okay, beautiful.

Okay, now Olivia. Well, that was that. That was our Love Island fantasy bracket update. Okay, I'm half a love. Okay. That's music. Now, here's something. Yeah.

Olivia. Yeah. What is the plan for today? episode. I have not been told. I asked you. You said, I have an idea for today's episode. And then I said, oh, cool, what's the idea? And then you said, I can't tell you. And now I'm about to reveal today's episode. Today's episode is Olivia's perfect episode. Music. Cut the music. Let me explain. So this music, this music, okay, I'm actually having aneurysmsmson today. That would be in my perfect episode. Yeah, is me having aneurysms. It's just everyone speaking

wrong. Today's episode was designed for you by me. So this is a gift to you. And we're going to start with the perfect Olivia segment, which is time to drink red wine. Here's a dry red. It has a duck on it. You love a bird. I do love a bird. A cheered. So every time the dry red wine alarm goes off, you have to drink more dry red. Okay. So our first alarm is going to go off. Wee-e-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h. That's a dry red wine.

Okay, well, I love that. Wow, CPS really coming through. Okay, CPS. Okay, CPS. Do you get any clams from CPS for me? Oh, that brings us to our first segment. I can't even believe you said that. Really?

I was just thinking, what's the worst place to get you? clams and it would be CVS. Our first segment is a game called, do you order clams there? Olivia, this game is really simple. I'm going to tell you a place. You tell me if you're going to order clams there. Okay. And I will tell you if you're correct. You're going to try to do this as fast as you possibly. Okay, am I going to tell you if I'm, if I, if I, if I, if I, if I, if I, in this state of mind, no, I should or shouldn't, or if I honestly will. If you honestly will. Okay. Okay. Okay. I'm going to be ashamed of so my answers. Or tell me when you're ready. So this is, do you order clams there? Olivia, are you ready? Yeah. Number one, Italian

restaurant overlooking the Pacific Ocean. Yes. Good. Italian restaurant overlooking the Atlantic Ocean. Yes. Correct. Italian restaurant overlooking a pond of street water in a Bakersfield parking lot. Yes. No. Olive Garden. Yes. No. Pet smart cat section is giving out free samples of shredded clams. No. Good. Gas station in Italy. Yes. We'll take it. Gas station on an island in Greece. Yeah. We'll take it. Gas station on Sepulveda Boulevard.

No. Correct. Hard Rock Cafe. Yes. No. I know I should have it. Rainforest Cafe. No. Good.

I would order fried shrimp, though. Good. Any chain restaurant ending in cafe. Sure. No. Your parents' house. Yes. Correct.

My parents' house. Sure. Sure question. Tirt question. Gail is kosher. No clams allowed to house. Oh, you know a clamless house? Clamless house.

Wow, a clam-free zone. A bar in downtown Los Angeles. Yeah. No. I know. I know. A 24-hour fitness locker room. No.

Correct. Thank you. A moving box under a highway overpass that has clams R Us written in Sharpie on it. Not if I'm sober. No. Just no in general. No. I mean no in general.

A temple. Cosher, right? I can't. You're learning. I can't do it here. No matter what I want. An AMC movie theater that is also selling Wicked Popcorn, which is stale green and pink kettle corn.

Oh, boy. You know this one. I can't. Correct. I can't because I already bought the Wicked popcorn and then ate two handfuls of it and went, oh my God, I'm going to die. Charlie Day has six clams in his popcorn.

Yeah, 100%. No, darn it. No. An Italian restaurant, your dad recommended in Santa Barbara. Yes. Correct. Ah, that's a great game. And that was the game.

Do you order clams there? Oh, man. That's a beautiful game. I can't believe you naturally got us into that segment. I'm like really impressed. And I also just feel like almost self-conscious about it now. Right. No, about getting us into that segment.

Because I'm like, that is too perfect and it seems scripted. Oh, uh-oh-oh. I'm like, that seems scripted. I didn't even know what this fucking episode is. I thought you were saying I feel self-conscious about where I order plans. No, no, no, no, you should never. No, I feel very proud of them. You should never change that.

That's just who you are. Oh, oh, it's the dry red wine. Oh, no. Drink, drink, drink. What a drink, drink, drink. It is a great game. Oh, man. Oh, and then I'll have to make such a good episode for you.

And the thing about it, too, is you have kickboxing right after this, and you're going to be fucking slashed. I love it. And my two favorite things. Kickboxing and red wine. Uh-oh. Wee. Okay, we're going to do another segment. Oh, I love another segment.

Okay. If you know my girl Olivia Sophia Deerrantos, you know this bitch loves brain rot. Oh, I love it. You love it. Unfortunately, it's my hyperfixation right now. Love it so much. So this segment is called Making Up Brain Rot. Oh, wow.

Cut the music. So Olivia, today I figured because, you know, we've already gone through so much brain rot, that, you know, is stuff we use all the time. Right, of course. Jorking. like that. We're going to make up some new terms. Okay. So that we can have like some fresh brain rot out in the world. I think that's great. So let's think of some stuff. What do you feel like there isn't brain rot for that there needs to be? Okay. Um, there's no brain rot word for hitting someone

with your car. That's so true. Yeah. I'm going to pitch squalching. Okay. I'm pretty sure squelching is something. I'm pretty sure squelching is something. I'm pretty sure squelching is something. I'm pretty sure squelching is I'm pulled up to a Black Friday ad on my Gmail that says free chicken breast for life. Oh, it's squelching. Oh, squelching is something. Squelching is making a soft suckling sounds such as that made by walking heavily through mud. I'm sorry. Okay, but squalching is nothing.

Make a soft sucking sound such as that made by walking heavily through mud. That's nothing, right? No. Okay, I was just checking that I'm not having a mannerism again. It's also forcefully silent. forcefully silence or suppress. Okay, this is not English. Okay, to squelch. Like, I'm squelching your cries for help. And this is like on the main Google. Yeah, this is on the main... But squalching is nothing? Squalching is nothing. Okay, let us know if squelching is something

and we're wrong, but yeah, squelching, that's great. Squelching is hitting someone with your car. Yeah, I like, I said like, I squelched twice. I squelched twice this year. This year. Hopefully, a couple less. Hopefully, literally a couple less. Hopefully I squelch zero times next year. correct. I think that like there are a lot of terms for you know sexual things that no one will ever do. Right. Yeah like munting. Like munting, which is. Which is really gross. It's like a really gross. I mean the problem is munting's a hilarious word but it's such a gross concept. It's jumping on a corpse. It's when one person jumps on a corpse and then the other person sucks the juices out. Yeah, that's the part I hate like fucking a corpse jumping on a corpse. These are all things that I can

distance myself from enough in reality to find them funny in a cartoon way in my head. Right. But once we're talking about going down on a corpse, it's a lot. And then like really getting into the specifics of that, I feel like that's so much. So I think we should make up another sex term that no one would ever do. Right. Do people jelk? Jelking is, jelking is like doing a weird thing to your dick. Pull your dick so that it grows the force in?

It makes your, you like pull on your dick to, like, injure your dick, and then it like grows. thicker. Okay. Okay. But it's just scar tissue. Right. And I don't know if anyone actually doesn't or not. No, I don't think anyone does it. Okay, but what's a sex act that no one's ever done and no one ever will do? Um, God, there's something for everyone is the problem. I know. God damn. God damn. Okay, what about, um, putting a, using your hole, uh, as a cocoon, putting a small bug in there. Right. And then releasing it when it becomes a right during sex yeah I think that some I think that's safe to say no one I don't think anyone's ever done that no one's and if you have truly let us know please God

and what is that called um that is called capooning it's called a cocooning yeah it's called it's called it's called pocuning pop no capooning it's called pocuning capooning it's called capooning it's called capooning Capoeing. Capoeing. Because it's like a cocoon. And it's like a coon. And honestly, that might be too smart.

For brain rot? It might be, because like everything's just like... Gorshka. Like a Blumpkin. Blumkin is not brain rot. Blumpkin's been around forever. Yeah, that's true. Blumkin has been reabsorbed by brain rot. They reabsorbed shit.

I love that. There's no brain rot... There's no brain rot for suspecting two people are doing incest whoa there's no brain rock turn for that is it and you know that's something

that I feel like there should be yeah there should be because that's a thing that people suspect sometimes it is like oh these two and for example yeah you know like

and we've talked about this before on the podcast but like in Twilight all of those siblings are fucking and it's something that like they can't reference that with any term no

the other students at Twilight High can't be like I have a feeling that these siblings are fucking. These siblings are not only vampires, but they're fucking. But not only thousands of years old, but fucking each other. Yeah.

And siblings, question mark. Question mark. So the suspicion that people are doing incest could be called. Yeah. Um, it's like, uh, like that whole family's scorching. Scorching. Yeah. Is scorching a term?

I don't know. Because there's like scorching, like a scorched. Like, yeah, like if you're scorching in hell. Yeah. From your incest. Right. Uh, guess what time it is. Oh, I have no idea.

More wine. Oh shit. Wee-wee-wee-wee. I'm trying to do the alarm, too. It has nothing to do with me. Wee-ew. Oh, that's lovely. Chaggette.

Chaget. I loved all of this so far. This is so flattering. Is this a good fun episode? 100% I'm having so much fun. Okay, let me pull out my notes really quickly. It's shut down on me. I move when the notes shoot down.

The next segment is, um, Olivia's been on kind of a pet finder kick lately. Oh, I have. Um, you've been loving it. looking at pictures of PetFinder. I'd be stalking pets in these streets. So I think right now let's describe some perfect pets.

Oh my God, for me? Yeah, this is a segment called Olivia's Perfect Pets. Oh my God. Cut the music. Okay, so just to have like a little preface, preface, just to have a prelog, what's it called?

Preface. To preface this. I grew up with like 40 pets. Yes. I grew up with like five chinchillas and five chickens and like a dog and like four cats and a bunch of rabbits and it's a hamsters and 21 guinea pigs and shit like that. So I'd quail at one point. So I'm really into pets. Like I, it's like not not my special interest.

Got it. And I, yeah, I would say, yeah, I'm definitely starving for a new pet. I'm definitely starving to eat it. To eat it up. Right. So let's talk about like what we're looking for in a pet. 100%. I'm looking for something fluffy. Fluffy. Yeah. You're looking for something, um, not independent, but not super clingy.

Yeah, I want something that I don't have that much guilt if I needed to go do something, but also that would still, you know, I would still be a very good pet parent. But that's the biggest reason I'm not getting a dog right now. I'm just like, I don't want to feel the guilt of like this dog. sad because I'm doing shit. Right. And maybe I'll want to feel that guilt in about a year or so. We'll find out. But yeah, something that's like interdependent. Like wants to hang with me, but also like isn't traumatized if I had to go do shit. Fluffy interdependent size. I mean, okay, here's the reality. In a perfect world. It's not about the size. It's about the motion

of the ocean. It's not the motion of the ocean. No, in a perfect world as big as can be. As big as can be. Yeah. In a perfect world, I would have like a, what are they like, they're like Caucasian, it's a bad start. They're like, you want a Caucasian. They're like a Caucasian. Yeah, I want a Caucasian. Like a huge Caucasian.

Bim, B'bam, b'amu, b'oo, b'oo, b'o. Wine. Wee, wee, wee, we, we, we, we, we, wine. You heard me. My ideal pet is a huge Caucasian. No, they're called, like,

Caucasian shepherd something, and they're, like, the biggest dog ever. Okay. But they're vicious. Just like most Caucasians. Yeah, I know, right? They're huge and vicious. So, yeah, I would want, like, a huge,

huge dog like a Newfoundland or St. Bernard. But like I, in a reality, I'd probably go for something small or medium small because I live in a studio apartment. And I, um, I'm not that strong. I'm strong for my bill. Why do you need to be strong? Big dog decides to run into the street. I was raised with a big dog, right? So you got to, you got to have the muscle to essentially fight a big dog sometimes. Like when the big dog wants to do something, you're like, you can do that queen. Like, I know you can't speak English, but you just purely can't run into the street. Oh, that raises another question. Yeah. Sounds. Is this animal going to make human sounds? Is this animal going to speak in English? I think it has to. Yeah. Like a parrot. Yeah, like a parrot.

A huge parrot. I would be, a parrot would be perfect for me because I would be so much more annoying. Like, the amount of annoying that I already am, it would be compounded with a parrot who repeats shit I say, which is probably how people. feel like I feel like we're probably two parrots who are peach shit the other person says and it's just like awful for everyone. Unfortunately we are two parents who are only raised with each other and we just repeat like what we've heard the other one saying. They're like, like, oh, like over each other like this, yeah, 100%. No, that it's not, yeah. It's like my spirit animal in a bad way. Okay. Like I don't, and also they live so much longer than you and that's crazy.

Yeah, having to put your pet and your will is a crazy thing. And then what are we thinking for name slash titles. Oh, something, something iconic. Yeah. I've always wanted like a big, mean-looking, flat-faced Persian cat named Judas. Yeah. Yeah. Like, how good would that be? Oh, really good. I had in the past, and he was an icon, I had a guinea pig who was like a big, fluffy white guinea pig named Dill. Love him, miss him. He's the fucking best. Um, he and my dad became best friends, which was funny because my dad would have to take him to the bed and be like, I'm sorry, his name is Dill. Yeah. And he and Babs became such good. friend.

I had a rabbit named Barbara Streisandt. Another iconic name. Iconic rabbit. Yeah. Iconic rabbit. They had a really interesting, funny dynamic where Dilf would follow Babs around and Babs would just be like, I don't fucking go. Yeah, Babs didn't really give a fuck, but also a dog I knew loved Bab.

Oh no, love Dilf. Fuck me. Well, anyway, my little brother had a hamster name sandwich. Yeah, that's a really good hamster name. Yeah, so it's got to be a funny name. Like, it's got to be a name that like when people go, oh, what's the name? it's like a response it's like oh that's sick that rocks yeah like musilini yeah like awesome name like Joseph Stalin that's an all that's a beautiful name for a pomorini or a

a fucking parrot named Joseph Stalin is so crazy yeah oh my god being like oh sorry I inherited this parrot from some from my grandmother's will its name is Joseph Stalin and it only is annoying it just repeats annoying shit my grandmother said when she was in her 20s speaking of an shit that someone could say, it's wine time. There's no way my kickboxing instructor is watching this, but if you are, I'm fine. I was drunk when I showed up today.

So fine. You know what, that's my two favorite things. Being drunk in kickboxing. Two of my favorite things happen. And yet you don't want to beat me up. I know, I don't want to wrestle with you. If you know anything about my friend here, Olivia Sophia D. Loretta, you know that she is a decorator crab.

decorator crab. Let's talk about it. I am a decorator crab. That's cool. Lovey loves to have things. I love things. She loves to be given things. She loves to have things and put things around. I love it. So this is a segment called presents. Okay. Yeah, okay, so. Cut them either. Here's the thing. I don't even know if I believe in the love languages because weren't they created by some super religious guy to make his wife believe she loved housework or something? I'm obsessed with that. I don't know. Yeah, there's some fucked up shit with the love languages and there are. like not good. I know it was not created by a therapist. No, I know it was it was like created

by like a guy whose thing was like my love language is you fuck me and your love language is you like the clean or something like that I don't fucking know. But I will say out of all the love languages gift giving sounds the worst right it always sounds the most like French Prince like little boy French Prince but in reality I'm the type of person where if I like you at all and you give me a bottle cap I will keep it for the rest of my life. Decorator crab. I'm a decorator crab. It's not about the value of the thing. It's about the sentimentality that you put on it. And also I'm a I channel my This is gonna sound so Hack, but it is actually true. That's okay. I channel my obsessive compulsiveness into getting

really intricate presence for people because it's one of the ways I can be compulsive and like like like my brain can be mentally ill, but it's a positive out. And it's also like an arts and craft. It's so fun. It's like an arts and craft. We love it. Genuinely, I have, I have fun doing almost nothing more. Okay, so it's time for. Did you get me presents? Yeah. What is this? Okay, it's the segment. It's the segment. So the first gift is for a self-care day. You've got three different sheet masks for your face. Oh my God. Because you've also been complaining about your face being dried. Thank you.

Yeah, I'm getting stress for Zasia. And I used my last three face masks. I brought them to our election night, sob night. And we did a self-care night on election night with our friend group. Well, now you have three new face masks. Holy shit, that's incredible. This one, moistrising.

I'm aloe. Oh my god, I am aloe. This one, hydrating. I'm lavender. That's so great with my horrible dry skin. This one, clear skin. I'm rice. I love to be rice.

This one is, I'm rice. My favorite thing to do is be rice, and I am rice. Now you are rice. Okay, next little thing we have... Oh my God, that's so nice. This is so nice. What the fuck? The next little thing we have is this is both the color of wine, so you'll like it. Oh, I love the color of wine, if you can tell.

It's velvet, and it's a little like... Oh my God, what the fuck? This is a little like... Wait, this is crazy. You just created a podcast episode where you give me a bunch of presents. I think I'm in a coma. So this is like a little hair clip with a ribbon shape. Oh my god, I'm gonna wear that like every day of winter. I felt like that was kind of you.

That's like my winter hair thing, right? Look how me this is. Like I put- It matches your shirt. It does, and then I put my hair back like this and it's all cute and I go like, whoa, except I do it better than that because it's super. No, it looks good. No, it does look, holy.

There you go. Okay, well, that's amazing. Next gift. You're getting this. This is insane. Uh-oh, it's wine time. Oh my God. Oh, wait, I need more.

I have to get more. Let me put this again. We do. Weeo. This is like a birthday. Well, yeah, it's like my birthday. It's like my birthday. It's your birthday, you know, in April.

Yeah. This, you know, so my birthday's in April, so this is a great birthday episode for me. Hello, that. Okay. Okay. Next gift. This is, I don't know who these little guys are. I love little guys.

This is a tinted lip oil kit, and I love lip oil. And it's a holiday. collection and they're strawberry shortcake characters but I mostly was like look at these little guys. Oh that's so good. Like I love that. They're just these little guys and they're like painting. Also if they taste anything like strawberry shortcake, that's going to be iconic. Yeah, they're painting little candy canes and I thought that was cute. Oh, I love that. So this is the strawberry shortcake three-piece shimmer lip gloss set, a delightful treat for your lips indulge in our sweet essences with this irresistible collection inspired by everyone's favorite dessert character. Okay, I've never thought of

strawberry shortcake as my favorite dessert character, but it might be. I didn't even know that was like an option. Also, it is four different pieces, so it's crazy that it calls itself a three-piece kit. Yeah. It is very clearly a four-piece kit and in fact says on the front four-piece. Okay, this packaging lies. Okay, we love a liar, we love a package. So yeah, I guess that's really strange, a dessert character. This is exactly what I need. Can you think of any other dessert? character? Truly no. Like McDonald's character, like is Grimmis a dessert character? Grimmis is just an abomination. Grimus is an abomination. Shake from Aquitine Hunger Force isn't the dessert character, is he? Well, a shake could be a beverage. It could be a beverage. It could be a side. It could be a lunch.

It could be a dinner. Isn't it crazy how we pass off shakes as beverages? Yeah, that's crazy. Those are not evergings. That's a fucking ice cream. That's a fucking ice cream. That's a dessert. Okay, and your last gift of today. This is an insane segment that I love so much. This I do feel like you're really going to use a lot. I love all of this. This is a flask with like a bejeweled rose on it. It's like the most you.

I don't know if you can tell from looking at my apartment in the background of art thing, but I have so much red and black and pink. Honestly, my entire frame right now, if you're looking at my frame, we've got red, black, and pink. That's my vibe. This is like... It's my vibe. now. This is the thing. And you hate it, that's literally okay. All you have to do is not microwave it. I wasn't going to. So when you're trying to make your wine warm, when I'm trying to make my wine warm,

I microwave my wine first. Yeah, and then you can put it in a glass and then I, and then I pour my smoking hot water. Holy shit, this is so nice. Oh, I'm going to give you the coolest fucking episode. That was the present segment music. Cut the music. Okay, perfect. This is crazy. Grimit, great, great. Um, okay. I think I have like one more segment and it's beautiful. That's beautiful. That's beautiful. Okay, I'm so excited. Um, okay, uh, one more segment in this episode and then I think we're kind of out. Yeah, I think, I think that's, I mean, I can't, I couldn't take anymore. I know. So, um, if you know anything about my good friend here, Olivia Sophia Di Laurentis, you know that

she loves a Discovery Plus reality television show. I do love that. I love that. I love that. And I know them all. She likes to talk about them. So this segment is called Olivia gets to talk about her favorite discovery plus reality dating show or reality show in general for one minute timed, non-interrupted. Oh my God. Okay, wait, let me think of a good one. Play the music. Cut the music.

I'm picking my favorite one. Make sure you're picking your favorite one. I'm going to time you. Okay. You're going to have one minute on the clock and you can talk about any discovery plus show. you want for one minute. Any show you want. Okay. There's so many good ones. Ooh. Um, okay, there's so many. Okay. Okay, you're ready? I know which one I'm gonna talk about. Okay, you've got one minute on the clock and go. I'm gonna talk about, and you might have heard me talk about this before, audience.

I'm gonna talk about I am Shauna Ray. Because the thing about I am Shauna Ray is that it is fucking crazy. So it's about a woman with pituitary dwarfism. And she is 20, I think when the series starts, she's 21, 22, she looks, I shit you not, she sounds seven. She sounds like a child and she looks like a child. And she smokes, she vapes, she drinks, she has tattoos. And the whole show is about like every, me, like, what the fuck? Like, she goes to every bar and they're all like, whoa, what the fuck you are, no children are allowed at this bar. And she's like, I'm literally it, an adult.

And then she shows them her idea and they're like, what the fuck? And that's like the whole show. Her family is really nice. She has like a queer sister who I'm like absolutely loving. And then like a really trad sister who's also like really nice. But the problem is, she is an adult woman who wants to date, but she can't date anyone because if she's going to date someone and she looks like a child and sounds like a child,

she's dating someone who wants to date someone who looks like a child and sounds like a child unless she dates someone with between her orificism. And that is the biggest conflict in the show. Because it's a pedophile. Because it would be like, yeah. Yeah. Because it would be a pedophile.

Because it would. And I think that is crazy. It is the one Discovery Plus show where I'm like, everyone here is dope. Yeah. No one here is fighting with each other. other in a bad way. I would say the only people who are not dope are the people who are attracting Sean Array and I want Shauna Ray to find love but it is tricky it is one of the

trickiest questions you have because it's like well the pitoes are out she really does resemble a child and if you don't believe me if you think she seems like a little person who doesn't resemble a child look up I am Shauna Ray shout out to Shauna Ray I mean she's just awesome yeah we love her in this house we believe in science we believe that Black Lives Matter and we We love Sean Array. Yeah. Yeah. And that's what our sign says outside of the door.

That's what our sign says. I have it drilled into the concrete outside of my apartment. Um, yeah. So that was that segment. Yeah. Thank you so much for this episode. This is your episode. Oh my God.

I'm going to make such a good episode for you. You don't have to. Oh, I'm going to. And the good thing. It would be fucked up if I didn't know. It's absolutely fine. How fucking insane would that be if I was like, now? Just me.

It's absolutely mine. And until next time, make sure you guys tell us who's going to be voted off the Love Island. I know. Tell us who you're voting off. And if I die kickboxing, it's because I was drunk. That would make it my fault. Thank you for watching this episode. This whole time, I've been Olivia. This whole time I just said. Not psychotic drugs.

And we next Tuesday.