Syd & Olivia Talk Sh*t - This Bachelorette Turned Down The FINAL ROSE 🌹

Episode Date: September 9, 2025

This week on the big bad podcast for you, it's Susie Evans from Bachelor In Paradise! For you reality heads, Susie gets into the drama from her recent appearance on B.I.P., and plays a game of Will You Accept This Rose with slew of eligible "bachelors". Remember these episodes now go up a few days early AND with bonus content on Patreon! https://www.patreon.com/c/syd_and_olivia Listen to the show on the go! Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/2j0iQxY9Pf0h4mXEOFxgmk?si=a95ba3e2a2844ec4 Chapters 00:00:27 | Intro 00:01:16 | Welcome Susie Evans! 00:02:48 | Talking The Bachelor 00:15:43 | Will You Accept This Rose? 00:46:00 | Bachelor In Paradise 00:55:50 | The Weirdest Thing 01:00:50 | Psychology 101 01:03:40 | Going Stir Crazy 01:06:26 | Susie For Bachelorette? 01:08:05 | Where You Can Find Susie This is a 7equis Network Show Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Pretty sure he's a government. Official? Isn't he even the government? I'm not going to lie. This is my type. Yeah. Like, purely of looks and vibes. Like, I'm like, I know if I met the human version of that, I would like it.

Oh, my gosh. Welcome to Sid and Olivia Talk. It's the big bad podcast for you. Wow, it's a big bad podcast at you at Sid and Olivia Talk. I'm the Olivia one. I'm the Sid one. Wow. Out of Ward today.

I know, right? I'm spicing it up. It also doesn't have her sounds today. I don't have my sound, my soundboard, my very expensive soundboard today. And so Cass, our producer's going to do them when I signal him. And just so you guys know, for us, we can only hear the sound super faintly, which makes it way funnier. It's like coming out of a pair of headphones on the ground over here. Yeah, it's almost like disturbing.

A few moments later. Okay, beautiful. Okay, beautiful. Guys, we're very excited today. We have an incredible guest today. You know her. You love her from Bachelor, from Bachelor in Paradise. It's Susie Evans.

Glad to be here. Oh, my gosh. Thank you so much for coming on. Of course, glad to be here. It's beautiful in here. I love the set. Oh, my God. You're beautiful in here.

To make it. And we didn't do anything to make you either. Yeah, and you're also beautiful. Look at it. doing nothing and beautiful things just exist. It's your energy, honestly. You guys have great energy. Thank you.

Thank you. I've told mine is off-putting. I've been told by two ex-partners that I have the vibe of a Boston Terrier. I did know that about you. Yeah. That's interesting. I don't know what that means. No, me either.

I don't know how to confirm. I like a Boston Terrier. Great dogs. Yeah. Like try to throw shade and it's actually a compliment. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. And it was while we were dating and they were just like, yeah. yeah you're kind of like a Boston Terrier Yes I do remember that And it was like totally just neutral But two different guys That's really interesting

I will I will say that the second one It's because I said This other guy said I was like a Boston Terrier And he was like oh yeah You absolutely are And I was like okay Yeah yeah so anyway

Anyway Good thing that's over Anyway That's what is this soundboard That's a really good Sounds from the first one that came up. That's beautiful. Oh my gosh, Susie.

How are you? I'm good. Amazing. Amazing. For the people who watch this podcast who maybe don't know about The Bachelor. Like we like to say, for the cucks who don't know what the fuck is going on. For the stupid assholes who don't know what the fuck is happening in this dang world. In this dang world.

Thank God I said dang. I know. I know. I know. I know. Because. Grand safe, you know. Yeah, yeah.

I have to save the brand there. What would you say is your most famous moment from The Bachelor franchise? Okay, so it turns out both times I was on the show, I turned down the rose. Yes. Like the final rose on The Bachelor. And then this last season of Paradise, I turned down Justin's Rose, not knowing it was going to cause the most crazy. A tornado. Yeah, a tornado.

I just was very confused. And so, yeah, I guess like, I guess that maybe. Yeah, it is, I would say, wildly iconic. Yeah, I was driving here today being like, that is the sick, like, to be, have your two big moments being like, oh, no, no. Yeah. So fucking sick. Yeah, it really is actually, like, legitimately so sick. It's so, like, I'm like, how do you do it?

Tell me, like, teach me how to do it just so I can say no in general in life. Okay, this is the thing is I'm such a people pleaser. Yeah, me too. that like I my friend Carmen we always make jokes, make content about being like chronic people losers and she's like it's actually so amazing because we practice saying no all the time and she's like you actually said no on TV and I'm so proud of you. You practice it? Well like we with each other.

That's amazing. Okay like no like let's hold each other accountable like that you shouldn't say yes to that. Like you're overextending yourself like we really try to help each other. That's beautiful. We should do that. Yeah. I do that to you. Yes.

I should do it back and I should listen to you when you do it to me is what I mean. I mean, I say that those are like the big moments, but like I feel like I should also acknowledge like they're also attached to like a lot of layers and like sadness and like emotion. So it's not just like for me. Absolutely. The audience it's like, oh, that's fun or whatever. But sometimes I'm like, oh, God, like, loki trotic. Well, that's the thing is it's your real life.

Yeah. And it's like that's, I think such a, such a weird thing with reality because it's like there are so many reality shows. I love super, super fucking. weird reality shows. I love like, you know, like hunt down virgins, like, island or whatever, like things where it's like, what are you talking about or like bring my parents back together? That's not real. Bring my parents back from the dead and make them fall in love with other people's parents' islands. Like that's like, you know, neither of those two things are real. But like that,

you know. But why aren't they, Greenlight? But why aren't they? But it's like like Milf Manor. I love Milf Manor. Oh, Milf Manor so good. But and obviously like the franchises you are, the Bachelor franchise is far more classy than any of the things I just listed. But it still is, it's like it's, it's entertainment for people, but it's everyone's real life. And that's like such a weird line. Yeah. It's like you, I always say it, like you trade in. It's like a trade in. Yeah. You sacrifice a piece of your emotional well-being and like your privacy and things like that for the sake of entertainment. And I've always loved entertainment. So like it, a part of me was like, what do I care? And then you get in it and you're like, oh gosh, like this is actually so crazy.

Well, yeah, because people are commenting on what they think is you as a person and your character. And that is like, you can't change people's perception of you. They're just going to, like, perceive what they decide to. Yeah. It's just, like, really hard. It is. Yeah, that was, like, one of the hardest things when I went on The Bachelor the first time. Because, like, people pick apart your looks, your body, like, all kinds of stuff.

And, like, I feel like the first time I went on the show, yeah, I was, like, self-conscious about those things. But, like, nothing anyone said about my looks. or my body or whatever, like really fazed me. But when people said stuff about my character or like the nasty messages I got about, like, just like who you are as a person, who they think you are as a person. Right. That was like daggers to the heart. Because I was like, oh my gosh, like I care about people.

Like I feel like I really like people and I tried to be kind to people and like in general. But also on the show. And so when you get messages like talking about like just how people think you're a bad person, or like don't like you, it's like, oh gosh, that hurts so much more than the, like, physical appearance. 100%. But, yeah, of course. Judging your character is terrible. Yeah.

I mean, hopefully, like, I feel like it's because, like, normally you value your character over your physical appearance. And it's like, sure, it's, like, we all know that, like, the second you put yourself in, in the public eye at all, people are going to rip apart your appearance. So it's kind of like, it's a given. Yeah. Yeah. But, like, your character's, like, that's so much.

Right. It's such a worse insult. I feel like as a woman or as a girl, like we, unfortunately, and we try to live ourselves up and we try to like, you know, love ourselves. But at the same time, like, we have been tearing ourselves down for you. So I'm like, anything you're going to say to me, like, I've heard it. Like, I've done it to myself. You know, like, not be meaner to me than I have been to myself in my head. Exactly. But when it comes to, like, who I am and like how I, like, feel as a person, I'm like, oh, I would never like call myself like not a girl's girl or like, you know, and you know, and you know, and you know, and you. the things that came along with the first season of The Bachelor, where not that I had that narrative a lot, but towards the end, just with the finale and stuff, when I went back to Clayton, people said a lot of nasty things to me. And I was like, I would never like think that about myself. And this is how some people think about me. It was like, oh, my gosh, that was really hard to navigate. Yeah. Because so you were offered a proposal by The Bachelor. You rejected the proposal, which I'm pretty sure was the first time that had ever happened in Bachelor history. I actually, yeah, I don't know.

Maybe it is. I kind of think it. I can't think of another one. I mean, it is a, it's a really huge thing to happen. Yeah. Because it's like, you know, the concept of the show is to compete for this guy. Also, I think the reason it resonated with so many people is I think before that we weren't thinking about the contestants' autonomy.

Yeah. Right. All of these contestants, are they given the space to actually decipher whether this person is right for them? Yeah. 100% or is it just like this person gets to decide who's right for him? No, that's why I struggled so much. And like, I have to stop myself from like engaging sometimes because like sometimes you want to like fight back with the trolls and be like, oh my God.

You don't understand me. But like you have to like some people are just never going to understand. But that was one of the biggest things I struggled with with the bachelor was people were like, you know what you signed up for. Whether it came to the fantasy suite, whether it's like him being intimate with other people. And I'm like, okay, like some people choose. to be intimate with multiple people, but like I personally, it didn't make sense for me to like say yes to a proposal to somebody who's in love with somebody else and has been intimate. And I was like, for me, it doesn't like, I couldn't rot my brain around it.

And I'm like, that's, yeah, like, that's my, like, you have to take this home with me. Yeah. I also think there's such a difference between knowing what you signed up for and understanding what you signed up for in any capacity. Like when people even are like just do any type of life thing they've never done before. like having, you know, having a baby or like getting married or like, you know, getting a new job. It's like the thing you know you're signing up for logically is one level. But the actual going through it, you will never understand unless you actually go through it.

It's like we will never understand what it's like to be a contestant on The Bachelor. We can only ever imagine it. Because everyone would go, not you guys. Yeah, that's true. Not you guys at all. I'd love to know a lot on me. So it's like, it's such a crazy thing. it's like, yeah, sure, you know what you're signing up for.

But you don't actually understand the complexity and the heaviness of the real experience you were about to go through. I'm so curious about the experience. Like, as you said, like, we have no idea what this experience is like. Yeah. So it's so fascinating. When you, like, applied to be on The Bachelor, did you know who the Bachelor was going to be? Or did you know that it was just going to be someone who's like an eligible person who most people would probably want to date? The second.

Okay. Yeah. I was talking with a producer. Patrick and he was basically like, can't confirm or deny anything, but like, take a look at the, like, the past two seasons and just like, let me know who you think is cute. And there had been, I think Michelle's season had aired and then was it, uh, or no, Michelle's season hasn't aired. Katie's season had aired. And Michelle's hadn't. So I, like, looked at both of those guys and I, like made a list of guys that I was like, these guys are attractive, guys that I'd see on the show. I liked their personalities. Yeah. And then Clayton was on my little short list as well. I had never seen him on the screen, but I saw that he was from Missouri. I think he lived in Columbia, went to Missouri. And I went to school in Missouri. And so I was like, oh, we have like some stuff in common. And I remember like putting him on the list and being like, oh, that would be a cool, you know, tie in or whatever. So I thought he was an attractive guy and stuff. But I had no idea. I'd never seen him on my screen. I didn't know anything about him other than he went. It's from Missouri. Yeah.

And then when you get there and everyone's like in competition for him, does it feel like, you know, that has an effect on you psychologically? Like, oh, now I really want this person? I think, I don't know. I don't know that it was like the other people want. Like, I remember just being like, this is so fun. Right. Yeah.

I was like, this is so fun. Like, we're all having sleepover. It's like nobody has their phone. So we got to know each other super quick. Like literally, like, I cannot speak highly enough about my time on The Bachelor with the girls. And like just literally having, I woke up every day and I was like, when is this going to crumble? Like, this just feels like a dream. Like, it was so much fun.

I remember I got, I mean, I truly feel like I'm a personality person. So I'm like, if personality is there, I'm like, I, you could look like a potato and I'd be like, I'm into that. You know, like, if they're funny or if they've got a good person. but like I will say when I met Clayton I'd seen some pictures and I was like okay like he's cute like I typically wouldn't go for a football player right around I'm gonna be honest like that's not I like a little artsy farty like I completely understand edgy you know um but I was like okay he's cute and then when I got out the lima I remember seeing him and I was like damn he's tall and he is like built like he was just like a big structure and I'm like I'm a tall woman and I'm like I think kind of athletic and stuff so I was like I was like I was like I'm like I think kind of athletic and stuff so I was like I was like I was like I I was like, oh, this is nice. Like, I don't think I've ever met a man that big. So I was just like, this is hot. So I think that initial, like, attraction was there just knowing, like, he, like, sounds

vain or whatever. I don't know about, or shallow. I'm like, he was just like a really tall, big man. Yeah. And, no, and listen, sometimes it's like, attraction, I think is so much about personality and also vibe, right? Yeah. Like, even vibe more so than any other thing for some reason.

But also, like, yeah, there are things you're allowed to just be attracted to. when you're like, yep, I'm attracted to this person. And maybe it's not a right, a correct match. But like, you're allowed to be attracted to a big tall man. Yeah, I feel like it was like a big tall man. You know, I was like, yeah, big tall man. Cool. And then I feel like I bear, like I always tell people, I obviously got to know him after we started dating in the real world.

But like on the show, I really don't feel like I got to know him that well. And vice versa, there's not enough time. Like you get like 15 minutes per date unless you're on a one-on-one. And even then it's not that much time. So we just got like little tidbits here and there. So I don't, and he was, like, he was kind and I would ask all, everybody that worked there. I was like, is he an asshole when you wake him up early in the morning? Like, I was trying to get like tidbits of his character because I was like, that means more than I would say like how he's, how he treats me on like a little romantic date.

I'm like, of course he's going to be nice. There's cameras on. But like, who is he when the cameras are off? That's a really interesting point. Yeah. And that's fascinating knowing that so many people get engaged after only knowing. Yes. That sliver of, yeah.

over a thing about someone that is kind of insane. Yeah. I do think it was, it is crazy. I would have done it if there hadn't been like a big hiccup. Yeah. Because I remember thinking like it's not a legal commitment. Like whatever. Like I'll put a ring on my finger and I'll take it the fuck off if you're an asshole.

I'm out of here. Like I don't care. Like I am not. I do not care. I will not get married to somebody just because I said yes on a TV show. But I was like, I'm down to put a ring on my finger. And then I also always said like, if, we were to get engaged. I was like, you have to repurpose in the real world once we actually know each other.

That's nice. That's, that's sane. We did make a Bachelor-themed game. Oh, fun. So we are going to play a Bachelor-themed game. Love. This is a game called, will you accept this rose? Essentially, we're going to go through a list of, I guess you could say, guys. Yeah, potential bachelors, right? Potential bachelors. And you're going to say, would you accept this person's rose? And why or why not? Okay, cool. Yeah. And we can chat about it. Yeah, we can go into it. Okay. So this is a segment called, Will you accept this rose music?

Cut the music. I got a soundboard app if you want. Whoa. What? Whoa. Was that a Ruby Rooh? Okay. Cass just handed me a sound app,

which is so kind. But yeah, this one is, it's kind of like, it's like an off-brand thing. This one says confused dog. Yep, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Which is awesome. That's great. Scooby-Doo really is just a confused dog at the end of the day.

Yeah. An entertaining, confused dog. Oh, you have load gun and shoot gun. Okay, that's beautiful. That's way better than the gun sound you have on your... Okay, rude. It is. This one is Who Did It?

That's great. Is it good? Yeah. This is so stupid. Oh, good. We have a broken glass one. Oh, beautiful. All right. Well, the first person offering you arose is Danny Phantom. You might know Danny Phantom. From the cartoon Danny Phantom.

Yo, Danny Phantom. He was just 14 designed to build the world unseen. Sure, he's a cartoon character, right? Sure, he's a ghost. He's a ghost. It's coming back to me. He comes back and forth between a ghost and a boy. and he was much more human than the other guys yeah I just got to see a James right? I feel like he was hot right it's coming back to me I feel like he was hot

no he was I'm gonna accept the rose okay yeah I'm accepting that rose okay you're accepting the rose yeah he's the power stand look at his green green eyes and his long long thin limbs yeah I guess the question is would you accept a rose from Danny Fenton

and who's oh Danny Fenton is Danny Phantom when he's not the ghost when he's not going ghost when he's not going ghost Yeah, there is. Yeah. Look at him. He's so handsome. Yeah. He looks like a little troubled. And I like that, you know? Yeah. Like cute, edgy. If I was also underage, I would accept the rose. But as fairly. Now, I probably wouldn't. And you know what? If I was also a 2D drawing, I would accept the road. If I was a 2D drawing, yeah. Because as a 3D person, there's a little bit of a power imbalance. Right. No, that's fair. That's fair. That's fair. All right. You want to hit the next one? race car? Yeah. Beautiful. How one's race car. Oh my god. Oh, no, there's multiple pages. Mm-mm. Yeah. I hate that one. That doesn't make you want kids. No. Pass. Oh, that's actually sick as hell. Okay. The next one is Shang from Mulan. Oh, yeah. Shang from Mulan. I mean, Shang from Mulan could get it on every level. Yeah, he looks tall and big as well. He's big and tight.

Yeah, he looks big and tall. Yeah, okay, so Shang for Mulan. I know my dad. What's he doing there? It's almost like holding up a little guy. She's just holding up a little guy. Yeah. I like that. Yeah, I like when like a guy holds up another little guy.

Yeah. Like, Shane for Mulan is very comfortable in his sexuality because he like, he's a guy on his team who he's like kind of having some feelings for this guy. Yeah, absolutely. And then he kind of was like, let me like lean into this. Yeah. I love that for you. Yeah, I think he's job, Shang for Mulan. It's kind of great.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Okay, so that was great. That was dogs. Yeah, that was dogs. So we're all going to accept this rose, right? Yeah, I'm accepting that rose for sure. Yeah. Okay, the next one is the property brothers. Oh, now it's, we're talking both property brothers at the same time. Two for one.

Now, are they standing next to each other in, in a big suit or on top of each other's shoulders in a long suit? Oh. And which would you prefer? If we're going for height today, let's be on top of each other with a big suit. coat. Yes. And that man is at least 10 feet. Yeah, that's like a 10 foot tall person with like a belly button that speaks. Yeah. Now this is the property brothers. One of them is I think married to Zoe Day Chanel. Yeah. Which is iconic. Which is iconic. They're Canadian, I think. It's the night. And there's a third one. There's like a third goth property brother. No way. Yeah. Can we look up the third goth property brother? Oh, is that him? No way.

He says the third property brother. Okay. Well, he doesn't look goth in that. Wait, the third property brother. Look up the third property brother. Look up the third property brother. There's nothing like them. I know. Are they, they're twins, though, right? Or are they not? I don't know at all. But...

Third goth. Okay. Okay. Okay. Yeah. He's not really got... Yeah. Look, there he is. Oh, Green Day. You know what it is?

He had like a Green Day phase. Yeah. Wow. Wow. Yeah, isn't that good? Cute. Two property brothers and a goth property brother. Now, would you rather accept the rose?

Let's say you're getting two potential roses. You can only accept one. Yeah. One of them is both property brothers. on each other's shoulders in a long trench coat. Yeah. The other one is all three property brothers in a long, even longer trench coat, even taller guy, but the Green Day property brother in his Green Day phase is the head.

On top. Yeah. Sounds like sexy to me. Yeah. I'll accept that, Rose. Yeah, I'll accept the two. Okay. The three is going to be too tall for me.

Oh, I say three is the more the merrier. The taller the merrier. The more property brothers the marrier. It's too tall for me. I've actually always said that. More property brothers the marrier. Yeah. Yeah.

And also they could design your house and this guy could sing a song. Yeah, that's so true. That's sick. At your housewarming. Yes. All for the price of one rose. All for the price of one rose. Okay, we give our rows to this guy, these guys, this item, this team.

This amalgamation. This amalgamation of things. Next, and we all know my answer for this. The Fox from Zootopia. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Played by James Bateman. Yeah, I mean, I think.

I mean, look at the brows. Come on. I don't know if they just really, and his name is Nick Wilde. Like, did they purposefully try to get everyone off or like, what are they doing with this? He's way too sexy. It's almost not allowed. Yeah, it's like when Nala was just so sexy that it's like, are you just trying to get everyone off? What are you doing with this?

Imagine this guy and Nala together. That is a fucking power. That would be so. crazy too just because of the size difference. I love it. Yeah, no. Yeah, he's so small and she would be the size of a lion. Yeah, the size of a lion and he's the size of a fox.

Right. And no matter how slutty and sexy, they both are, at the end of the day, she's a lion. She's a lion and he's a fox. Which is better than the other way around? Yeah. I'm trying to figure. Yeah. Yeah.

I mean, short king. Would the girl be the lion? Yeah. Yeah. I think if the girl is the fox and the guy is the lion, that's the lion. It's like too aggressive. Right. It's like, okay.

Yeah, you're like, oh my God, this is predatory. Right. This way, it feels good. Yeah, it feels at least better for me personally. I'll take the rose. Yeah, I'm going to absolutely take the rose 100%. Oh, Jesus. Sorry, everyone.

The next one is the Geico lizard. Oh. Now, you might be thinking like, I don't know, but really think about it. Just like really give it some thought. Quality guy. Quality guy, he can save you 15% or more. car insurance. But like, okay, go ahead. What? You got a bad experience? Can he or will he just sell it to you? Oh. Like can, like if you accept a rose from the Geico Lizard, do you automatically

by like, let's say you marry the Geico Lizard, do you get good insurance or is he just an insurance salesman? Here's my other question. Yeah. If I'm marrying you, I should be on your insurance. Yeah. And I shouldn't have to pay 15% or more on car insurance for, for car if I should want marry you. I should have to do if I'm only showing more unconsurance. I should be on your insurance. More insurance, bitch. Yes. And that's a great point.

Yeah. But like really, I think this guy has a vibe. Okay. Here's what I'm, I would, my instinct is no. But in person, I don't think I could say no. That's a little guy is like so tiny, holding a rose up at me. Like, how am I going to say no? Imagine you're at a bar.

Yeah. And the lights are dim. Yeah. And they go, excuse me, miss them. somebody just sent you this drink from down the bar and you look over and a man a man gets out of the way because you think it's him yeah he gets out of the way and it's this tiny ass lizard being like I'd have to talk to him I'd be like go over I'd have to talk I'd at least have to and that's the thing intrigue and vibe are so much more important than anything else a small animated lizard yeah could afford this drink yeah that's huge right exactly we owe him at least a conversation and he's not even really like 2D animated he's like fully. He has scales. Yeah.

This man is at a Pixar level. Yeah. Definitely. Definitely. It's giving HD. He's CGI for sure. He's CGI. He's HD and that's what I like in my personal partners.

I like men who are CGI and HD. Yes. Yeah. Next we've got Ivan the terrible. Oh. Now I would say don't let the name fool you. Oh, now this guy. Now this guy fucks.

Oh, yeah. Oh, wow. Now his face does look like It's melting off, but it's just a painting. What does it say about the secret police? Well, he was a bad guy. Oh, he was a bad guy. His reign was, well, don't let the name fool you.

His reign was defined by extreme brutality, paranoia, and the creation of a secret police. And you know what I call that? A bad boy. Oh, wow, which resulted in the mass executions and personal tragedies, including the accidental killing of his own son. But it was accidental. Well, but that's a backstory. But it was accidental.

You don't know him like I know him. Imagine going on The Bachelor and being like, yeah. So I accidentally killed my own son with my secret police. Cancelled. Immediately canceled. Oh, gosh. I'm out. I'm actually, I'm saying no to this rose.

That's so, you know what? And that's a boundary. Yeah. It's a boundary. It's a boundary for me that you killed your son. Who's the haunted man? Yeah, what's happening here? Is that his fun?

Because if there's a dagger in the head, I don't know how accidental that could have been. I'm in the terrible. That's actually such a fair point. It's like he did it himself and then held him when they found. Oh, no. Oh, my God. Was just in here. No, no, quick, make a painting.

Yeah. It says Ivan, Ivan, is it Avon or Ivan? Ivan. Yvonne. Ivan, but I love Yvonne. Avon. The idea that it says Ivan the terrible. Yvonne, terrible.

Yvonne the terrible. Yvonne the Kri-e. Yeah, I mean, if he rebranded to, from Ivan the Terrible to Yvon the Cuy, I would consider the rose. for a second. But then I also don't know if I'm the biggest, like, secret police, paranoia and brutality guy. Right. I know. Look at his, look at his eyes, man. I know it's so hard because there is some intrigue there. But the fact that the painting is called Ivan the Terrible and his son, Ivan, is crazy. It's called Ivan the Terrible and his son, Ivan? Yeah, and every other thing

except for this. Wait, I'm sorry. What? Go back to any other. Yeah, there it is. He's like so self-absorbed that he names his son after. himself and then kills him. Yeah, because he's like, there can only be one. There can only be one. And his son is like, you named me this. He sounds troubled. Yes. Wait, after Evan the Terrible had Delta. Oh, yeah, he killed his son in a fit of anger. And then, why did they say accidental? Because I think maybe. Because it wasn't premeditated. Yeah, I think he just wanted to fuck him up, but he didn't want to kill him. He didn't mean to kill him. No, he just wanted to like ruin his head and brain. Yeah. Yeah. The painting portrays the anguish and remorse on the face of the elder Ivan and the shock.

in the heartbreak on the dying. But guys, what? It was 1581. It was a different time. Maybe it was okay to kill your son back then. Are you going to take the rose? I'm going to take the rose just because I'm flattered. Yeah.

You're flattered. Yeah. He did it for me. Yeah. I'm flattered. Okay. I'm going to take the rose because I would love to chat with this man because I've never met anyone like him.

You know, I'm going to reject the rose just because I feel like I'm paranoid enough. Yes. No, I'm scared of him. Right. Right. Like, I'm paranoid. And I feel like if this guy came into the whole situation with some like, this person's out to get me, this person is, you know, made of rocks or whatever, I might be like, oh, no, what? And I think I would accept the rose because I'd be afraid not to. Yeah, that's fair. That's fair. That's allowed. That's allowed. All right. Okay, so this one was a little bit different from the others. Yeah. The next one is Jar Jar Binks.

Oh, shit. He's, um, I'm pretty sure he's a governor. official? Isn't he even the government? I'm not going to lie, this is my type. Yeah. Like, like, purely off looks and vibes. Like, I'm like, I know if I met the human version of that, I would like it. Yeah. You know what I mean. Yeah. And you know how he talks, right? Right. Exactly. Yeah. So he's a military commander and politician. And he says, like, me so, so, so. Sorry? Can we, like how he talks. He goes, Miso. He says Miso. Miso horny. Yeah, he says Miso. Yeah, can we look up Jarder Bink or Misa or what is he? Misa Miso Horny? Yeah, it's like, can we look up Jar Jor Binks talking just to like get a- So if Jar Jar Binks was the Bachelor, you'd be like, I'm coming back on the show.

Yeah, that makes sense. And if Jar Jor Binks had that hiccup, what do you think would have happened? I would have had to look past it. Yeah, that's fair. Let it slide. Yeah, I'd let that slide. You'd be like, yeah, Jar Jor Binks. I understand all Jajor Binks. I understand. It's like, you're Jar Jor Binks and that's fine. Exactly. exactly yeah and listen he's got he's got a he's got like intergalactic shit to do right yeah okay there's like just something about him you know look at him look he's cute this is the way this is the way wait did he did say excuse me wait can we pause he said excuse me yeah he did say

excuse me and that made the final cut yeah that's why everyone hates charge our binks is because he everyone's like sorry what the actual fuck why did you put that in the movie we put the we put the alien who says, excuse me? Yes, that's like the whole thing. That's like him saying ok-dokey. Yes, exactly. That's why everyone's like so mad. Okay. Yeah. Because he wasn't in the original. Sith Lord. Wait, wait, wait. Yes, there is.

There is. There is. That he always bumbles his way through like beating the bad guys, but he always wins. Yeah. And it does it in a way that like, like drunken master style. Yeah. It's kind of giving like a sandbagger. Like he undermines, like he downplays. Yeah. I love that.

He's a. It's like, look. manipulative. Yeah, he's low-key. You know, George Rink says low-key manipulative, and that's why we're taking his rose. Okay, yeah. I do love what he says... Can we hear ex-squeeze me one more time? Excrease me!

This is the way... Ex-squee-me! Yeah, that's crazy. Yeah, that's really good. Exquise me to be written into a Star Wars script is great. Yeah, it's really good. Okay, I'm going to say... That was beautiful, so that was a guess for me. I didn't know what that one was really going to be.

It said Morse code, but I kind of, like, didn't think about it. Okay. The next one, will you accept this person's rose? Michael Smith, who used AI to create a fake band and then used bots to inflate streaming numbers. And he earned over $10 million in royalties. Oh, my God. And now he's going to go to jail. Is that a mugshot?

Yeah. I'm saying yes with no pre-up. You know what I mean? I know. That was my first thought. He's locked up. Yeah. I'm cashing in.

Yeah. I feel good about it. Yeah. If we just got fully legally married right away. Right away. Well, is he, does he, is he all that money being taken away though? I don't, I would assume. Okay, then probably not.

But if he still has the money, I will absolutely be a prison wife. Yeah. For a second. I could, yeah. Yeah. It is crazy. He, he, he, he's essentially playing a game of make believe in such an interesting high level way. He's playing a game of make believe that got him sent to jail.

Yeah. Which is kind of. Cool. Cool. That's kind of... Do we know what type of music the music is? I don't... AI music, so it can't be that good.

No. It got $10 million, though. So I'm like, enough people bought in. But he made the fake bots. Oh, he made a fake band and then made the audience for it. He's honestly kind of genius. Yeah. I mean, he's like he loves the Sims is what I'm hearing right now.

Yeah, I love the Sims too. Maybe we would get a lot. And I love The Sims too. Yeah. So I get it. I'm like, can I get that. That's good. Kind of get it.

No, I feel like I would at least want to talk to him. Yeah. I'd be like, well, what other plans do you have? Like, what are your other schemes? Right. If taking the rose just meant I got a 15-minute date with him where I could ask him about his other schemes, would love that. Yeah, that's kind of how I'm thinking of this, too.

It's like, I guess if I accept the rose, I just get to talk to him further, which I am curious to do. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And maybe we can, like, put his evil geniusness to, like, good. Yeah, we can do something with it. And we can still make the money. And we can, maybe we could even save the world with that amount of knowledge. Like if you applied to something good.

Yeah, you never in. We could make music that saves the world with this guy. I've always had that. And then we... Yeah, I mean, if you can make that many bots and like make money off of it, I don't know, maybe there is... Maybe you can do something good. Maybe you can do something really weird and good. Who knows?

We don't know. We don't know unless we take the rose. Take the rose. The next person is the human carpet. Oh, shit from New York. Do you know about the human carpet? I don't want to take a fucking rose from the human carpet. I'm going to take it.

The human carpet or Kevin carpet. Oh, fuck me. What is this? Raps himself in a carpet and lies in public spaces. Inviting strangers to walk over him as a form of interactive performance art. He's there. He's in there. There's a person inside this carpet and he wants you to step on him.

Yeah, he wants to get stepped on. Yeah, what this feels like? What? So I will let my niece and nephew step all over my back. And I'm like. It's fun. He, he,

ha, ha, but it's like fully a back massage. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. He just is, like, craving human interaction. And he's like,

let me just roll myself up in a carpet and, like, get a little back massage in public. You're right. That's what it feels like. I love a back massage. It might be like,

I would love a back massage. Well, I guess the question is, because he's underneath this thing, right? Like, which way is he lying? Well, yeah,

we don't know. We don't know because he's covered. So if he's lying, if he's lying face up, then people just want a rib cage massage. Yeah, if he's lying with his like, if he's lying like that with his back on the ground, then it's like, okay, are you trying to get your organs stepped on? And that's weirder.

And can we blame him? I would say back down's a little creepier to me. But face down, I'm like, okay with. Yeah. Yeah, face down feels less sexual. And if it is sexual still, it feels like I'm farther away from everything going on for you. Like if you're getting aroused, at least I'm stepping on your back far away from your Or junk.

Yeah. Yeah. Whereas like... Yeah, junk forward freaks me out. Because I'm... I don't want to step on anyone's organs. Like, I don't want to step on anyone's torso. I don't want to step on the upper part of anyone's body.

Right. I mean, how old is this gentleman? Do we know? What a good question. I don't know, because he's usually under a carpet. So I can't tell how old is the human carpet? How old is human carpet, NYC? Yeah, I would like to know.

And the way we found this out is we wrote a sketch about people pretending to be furniture. and somebody was like, oh, is this about the human carpet? And we were like, what are you talking about? And then he's learned about this and it's insane. Oh, there's a New York Times article about him. Yeah, he's 48. Okay. Oh, wait, different carpet?

There's multiple men. Yes, right. Quotes in perverted. Yeah, because this one's the perverted one and the other one's just an artist. Okay, wait. So there's one who's specifically like, I'm the perverted one. Yes. Okay, so imagine you're on the bachelorette, right?

You get brought in and two of the people brought on, the first night are the non-perverted artist carpet guy. Kevin Corpett. And the pervert carpet guy. Pervert carpet. You're taking pervert. Which one would you do, said? It's okay.

You like the pervert carpet. There's no judgment. I like the pervert carpet. Well, there's too many artists anyway. There are too many artists. Literally. No, I just think like pervert carpet could still have a job. Right, right.

Artist carpet does not. That's fair. This is artist carpet's job. Right, right. Whereas pervert carpet might have a job. This is just a hobby. This is just his sexual hobby for him. And I'm like, who, everyone deserves a sexual hobby.

Everyone does deserve a sexual hobby. And listen, I don't know if it needs to be something that other people have to see in public. No. But it is for him. But he's just looking for love. We're not going to yuck his yum. Yeah. Yeah.

Exactly. Exactly. Because I don't know. Maybe I could find a way to find this fun. Yeah. He knows. Yeah. I would have to just give it some thought.

You'd have to give it some thought. Are you going for artist carpet or a pervert carpet? I think I'm going to go for artist carpet. That feels like your vibe. With the belief that we're getting like back rubs. You know what I mean? I'm going with like the face down because maybe I'll join him. I love when someone steps on my back.

Yeah, that's so fair. You know, it would be so funny. What? You were doing that if you were one of the carpet people in New York City and then they reveal it's you. Like three weeks from now if someone does an investigation and you guys like, you guys know it's Susie from the back part? Yeah. And I'm pervert

One. Oh, I'm the pervert carpet. Don't worry. Ew, the pervert one is so gross. The carpet person in New York is actually Susie from The Bachelor. That would be the craziest reveal. Like that would be, because you all expected to be

like some creepy old guy. Like a hot young girl. What are you talking about that? Yeah, it would be really weird. What would you pick? Pervert or artist? Or both. Yeah, I mean, can I take a rose from both?

Absolutely. I got to get to know both of them more. I think that's fair. I got to get to know both of them more. Yeah. Yeah. I think that's totally fair. Okay. Last, last but not least, of course. Are you going to take a rose from the Greenland shark who is over 400 years old? Oh, shit. Terrifying. And she's a girl. Oh, okay. I'm suddenly. I'm suddenly a little more comfortable. And she's a more comfortable. And she's so big, right? She's huge. Oh, dear. She's 512 years old. Oh, my God. Up to 50012. We don't know because we haven't cut her open and counted her rings. Yeah. Yeah. I, yeah. I. I, I think it would be, I mean, so first off, this feels very golden bachelor. And that's, it's giving golden bachelor. And that's beautiful. Make the Greenland whale who is up to 512 years old. The golden bachelorette again.

Again. Yeah, I've always said that. Imagine like a bunch of like 60 to 70 year old men coming in and fighting for this woman. Yeah, and like at 512 year old whale. pulling up in a limo and there's just like a whale, like a whale. And then being like, hey, Greenland whale. I love my grandkids. It's a shark too, which is like so much scary.

Oh, it's a shark? Yeah, it's a Greenland shark. I fully thought it was a whale. Yeah. Because it's so big. Yeah, it's whale sized, but it is shark. How big is she? Yeah, how big is she?

How big is she? She's huge. Oh, oh. Longest living vertebrae. I wonder what her diet is like? Yeah. She's like a, what is that? Is it the red zone?

people live forever. Blue zone. Blue zone. Thank you. Yeah. Yeah, she's giving blue zone energy. She's on a Mediterranean diet. She's about 16 feet long. Oh, that's not my type. Yeah. Yeah, I think that like, big. If I were to, yeah, big and tall. Big and tall. Oh my God. If I were to go for like an older woman too, I feel like I would love to go for like a 16 foot long shark. Right. That's 512 years old. I also look at this woman. She's gorgeous. Oh, she's beautiful. She's embraced her, her natural beauty and I think that's really cool. Aged gracefully, as they say. She has. She really has. Yeah. She doesn't look like she has any work done. No. No. No. Oh, she does have a nose ring. Yeah. I did.

She's a nose ring. Which is fun. That's like body mod. It's like alt. But it's not like, you know, she's not trying to be anything she's not. Yeah. She kind of reminds me of the old ladies in the UK who dye their hair blue. Yes. Like she's still fun. She's so fun. She's so. And I would totally take her rose. Pain can hit hard and fast, like the headache you get when your favorite team and your fantasy team both lose. When pain comes to play, call an Audible with Advil plus acetaminopin and get long-lasting dual-action pain relief for up to eight hours. Tackle your tough pain two ways with Advil plus acetaminephim. Advil, the official pain relief partner of the NFL.

Ask your pharmacist at this product's rate for you. Always read and follow the label. Can I pitch one more contestant? Of course. Oh, yeah. Can we see FaceBank? What is that? So if you go to images, yeah. So that's FaceBank. Okay. So.

Now, Olivia, you sent me this photo. Once I sent Cassam, our producer, this photo at like one in the morning. No explanation. Now, what is FaceBank? So this is FaceBank. Face Eating Money Box. That's what I call my pussy. It's this little cube, this little colored.

cube and that has a little face and it eats your coins just like your pussy i i like this i like this i couldn't find a chiching so doorbell is close enough i like this for some reason but it also makes me like a little uncomfortable oh it's super yeah yeah yeah it's i wonder we can find a video of face bank eating a coin yeah i would love to see a video yeah yeah what's in oh not what's inside FaceBank. They're going to cut its face off and I don't really care. I just want to see it eat the coins. I just want to see it eat the coins, please. Guys, please.

Okay, we don't need, oh, here we go, here we go. Oh, no. It looks worse on videos. Fuck yeah, FaceBank. Oh, my God. Isn't that good? Oh, it's guzzling that coin. It's one of my favorite.

Wait, that looks like, is that an animation? So that's an animatronic face. Oh, my God, I want to tie. The whole video looks like an animation except for the hand coming. No, so it's, so this is. So this is, I've seen a face bank in real life too, but did you feed it? Where did you see one in real life? Sometime in high school, because I became obsessed with face bank in high school and it just popped back into my brain.

Oh my God. Wow. It's so slow. It's so slow. And it doesn't really eat the coin right. No. It's like a little monkey. It does.

I would definitely take face banks, Rose, but I think that's pretty clear. Yeah. I do think that it's like, it's not working. It really is having a hard time drinking the coin. And it's kind of like, why not just get like a regular piggy bank, I guess? Or like a jar. What it does is gag on the coin. Right.

And like it feels like torture. Yeah, it's not liking it. I, he's essentially doing what I would do if I was like at somebody's house and they cooked me a meal and I didn't like it. Yeah. I'm like trying to swallow it. I'm like, moving it around. Like you think someone may be poisoned you. Yeah. Like this guy doesn't like that coin.

No, he had to like jam it down his throat. Yeah. I mean, I already know that people put their dicks in this. Yeah. And that doesn't make me happy either. I'm not going to lie. Like my mind went there too. Yeah. Yeah. You see that and you're like, well, somebody's putting their dick in that. Something.

And I don't love that. But, um... Okay, so you don't love that FaceBank is bi. Okay. Okay. So you're biphobic. I think that FaceBank is, well, it's in stock. I think it's, yeah, I do think I, yeah, I'll give him a rose. Why not? I do feel like I want to see him eat the rose.

I do have questions. So you're giving him a rose now. Oh, right. For all the other ones I was accepting. For this one, I'm going to give it a rose because I want to see it go down the throat. Yeah. It gives you a rose. You give it back.

It kind of jokes on it. drink the rose, right? Yeah. I think I'm accepting or giving either way as well. Yeah. I'm just like down to see more. You know what I mean? Like I'm not willing, I'm not ready to make a yes or a no yet on FaceBank.

You're not committing to FaceBank. Yeah. It's more of like a slow burn for me. Yeah. Especially if you have like a bunch of like, I don't know, like men fighting for your attention. And then this guy, that's going to really stick out. Yeah. Because the other thing too is that like with the guy who went to prison, right, we know that he at

made a lot of money. FaceBank has got maximum $7. Maximum. Maximum. Maximum $7. And probably not even that because he's spitting some out. He's not accepting most of the coins. So he probably is like $3.45. I'd like to campaign for every ATM to be a face bank. I actually love that. And you're in a rush. Oh, I'm, I really need $5. $5.5.5. It would be in my account. No one has ever gotten $5 from an ATM in the history of mankind. Sorry guys. I don't take cash out because there's none. But like the idea of being like, I really need some money really quickly and it's this guy being like, oh, wow. Yeah. And like throwing it up. Yeah. Yeah, it's really gross. I love this thing. I hate this guy, but I do love him also. And he comes in blue,

red and pink. And he shifts to the United Kingdom. Oh, now that's perfect. It does have three and a half stars. Yeah. Wow. Wow, that's more stars than I expected. Yeah. Okay. Well, I'm going to give my rose to face bank and also receive a rose. Yeah, that's beautiful. Oh, nice. That's kind of sick. Yeah, that was sick. Now I'm sick. Now I'm sick. Okay, that was a fun game.

So you're also on Bachelor in Paradise this season. Yes. And how long, how many days were you there? On the show or just in Costa Rica. On the show. I was there for, I think, exactly 24 hours. You were on the show for exactly 24 hours. And you made a.

literal, such a monumental impression. Probably not even on purpose. No. Not on purpose at all. No, it was not reading on purpose at all. It was reading totally just like, ah. Yeah. For people who don't know the show, how do we explain this?

So where do we start? I know. Yeah. I mean, okay, so I was on The Bachelor four years ago, haven't done reality TV or anything like it since. I dated a guy from the Bachelor franchise, not The Bachelor that I was on the show with for a little under two year or like a year and a half. I don't know. We broke up and then we both got an approach to go on the show.

We weren't in communication even though we were on good terms. We had a conversation before going, saying how much we loved and supported each other, wanted each other to find love, kind of just talked through things that were like fair game to talk about. but we did not want to like bring our real world relationship to the show. Because that's like honest. Like I'm sorry, but it's not worth it for me to exploit my person like someone else's personal life. 100%. I'll do whatever on the show, but I'm like I do not need to bring my real world things to the show for entertainment. Yeah.

No, there's enough entertainment built in. Exactly. Yeah. And just like even though he also has done the show, you didn't meet in that context. Right. So it's like that's not the type of relationship you have. Yeah. Right. So we went on, we both went to Paradise. We both kind of knew that one of us would probably get screwed. Like every year they do this. They like bring someone down first and then they bring someone down at a really convenient time. And then that person kind of gets like screwed. But we both had great conversations with the producers. And they did have a lot of change in like management production, showrunners, everything. And we were just both told like, hey, we think we have a solution. So you're not both down there.

together. You're not watching each other, date other people. We think we have a solution for this. And we both, oh, I don't know what he, his conversations were like, but I asked no questions. I was like very optimistic, which I was the same way on The Bachelor, which I think served me well in the sense that I was like, I'm just going to go be myself and like stay true to myself. And if I go home, I go home. If I stay amazing. I just really wanted to go have fun. Like I really didn't think there was like a high probability of finding the right person forever but I did think that it would be so much fun like I like the bachelor so much fun um but I was open minded and I was like they were you know hyping up that they were bringing back contestants from like way back and I I was like

okay cool so I was like I didn't watch the show up in like you know until like four five like four years before I went on or something so I was like okay like maybe they'll have contestants that are like in their early 40s or like what I don't know so I was just like open-minded down to go with the flow and then I feel like so Justin went down first my the ex that I dated and um he matched up with somebody obviously when I arrived I'd been in a hotel room for like seven or eight days at that point just literally locked up with no phone in there and oh my god just like ready to be on the beach so I was like okay I feel like I'm probably getting that the harder not the harder, but like the worst opportunity. I'm like, I'm walking into people already having relationships

and, yeah, so I go down there. Obviously, I'm not privy to the conversations that were happening with my ex and the person he paired up with. And watching it back, I'm like, oh, I know I see more of where he was coming from where at the time I was so confused and blindsided that he was, like, he offered me his rose to help me stay longer. It did feel really unfair. I, like, came in on the same day as three other girls. I was the last person to arrive. Like, I left my hotel at like 930. And then the next day, they're like, and we have a rose ceremony tonight. And I'm like, oh my gosh. Like everyone's been here for four or five days. I forget how long. And I just got here. Now I have to like either break somebody up. Or essentially break somebody up because everyone's given out a rose and formed a

connection. Everybody felt coupled up to me. Like no one seemed open. Even the guy Jeremy who, who talked to me. Yeah. He was like, you went on a date with this person. Yeah. And this is another person who is not your ex for the people who don't, who didn't see. You went on a date with Jeremy who was in a couple with Bailey. Yes. You didn't know how serious or not serious they were. Yeah. Jeremy Justice.

And he was so into you. I mean. Or it seemed so. We had a great date. Like it was super fun. We went jet skiing. So it's like, how can you not have fun? You cannot be depressed on a jet ski.

You always, you actually always said that. Yeah. Literally. Like, it was so fun. But that being said, we did, we were laughing the whole time. Like, we were just cracking jokes. Like, we did have good banter and stuff. So, like, it didn't feel. I was like, okay, like, maybe, maybe he's interested. But he also, like, preface while I was on the date with him. He was like, yeah, it's just like so hard. Like, you just came in. I've been building something with Bailey. And I think she's incredible. And so, like, and I, he never said, like, I'm not picking. you, but I felt it. I was like, oh, he's not picking me. Right. And that's like, I respect that. I was like, that's like so fair. You've been here for four or five days. I forget. Like, before I got here and you're basically given one two-hour date. And like, that would be kind of shitty to be like, okay, I've been like getting to know somebody and I'm just going to drop her. Like, I think he made the right choice by staying with Bailey. Yes. So he ultimately gave his rose to Bailey. Yeah. And your ex Justin gave his rose to you so that you could stay. Right. You were like, this doesn't seem like the right vibe. Totally. Earlier in the day, I mean, Jill and I were both like mini panic attacking the whole time. We came in together, not together, but like on the same day. And we both were just like, this is so fucked.

Like, this is like so not fair. I'm not. And what's frustrating is I feel like producers should know. Like, I am not going to be that girl that's going to interfere with anybody. Yeah. Even like anything. Like I am just going to come in if I have a connection, cool. But if not, like, I do not need anything bad enough to, like, hurt someone's feelings.

Yeah. Like, takes, like, like, I don't know how to describe it, but, like, take someone's man. Like, I wouldn't know how to do that if, like, I wanted to. No, there are people on reality shows who are like, I will come in and step on people's toes. I will come in and go after what I want. And there are people who are like, that's not really my. And it's like, yeah, it is your job as a producer to be like, this person will be great here. This person will go.

Exactly. And so I'm like, I'm not that way. in general. So I'm like, I'm not the right person to bring in. And I don't think they did it on purpose, but I just, I don't think they thought the relationships were going to develop that quickly. And maybe they saw, like, whatever was happening with Justin and Lexi. And maybe they thought, oh, Justin will save Susie. Also, like, Justin thought Jeremy was going to pick me. Like, earlier in the day, I was talking with him and Lexi. And he goes, well, Jeremy's going to give you his rose. And I was like, well, I don't just want him to give me the rose because I'm like the new girl on paradise. Like, I don't want to be like the shiny new toy. Yeah. Like if he has something special with Bailey, which it sounds like he does, I don't want to just like get his rose or whatever. And I didn't think I was, but Justin did. And so then we get to the rose ceremony. And yeah, Justin gave, Jeremy went first. And I think Justin found out right as they were going into the rose ceremony that Jeremy was going to give me and wasn't going to give me the rose.

So I think he felt this like in the moment decision of. like, oh my gosh, this person I care about so much. I know how badly she wants to be here. And, like, I hadn't done reality TV again. It had been four years. Yeah. And I was just really excited to be there. He was trying to do a nice thing. He really was. Like, I, and I knew that when he did it. And, um, I know this sounds so naive. I thought him and Lexi had like conspired this. Like, that's why I said no and went back in line. And I was like, okay, now Lexi will go. Like, I thought they had been like, okay, how crazy. I thought they had been like, okay, let's give Susie

like offer her the rose to be nice. And then when she says, no, I'll give it to Lexi. Like, I thought they had like done this together. Oh, wow. Sounds crazy. No, I understand. But like, you know, you never know. But people do crazy shit all the time.

Yeah. And I just was like, I was just truly so caught off guard. And I didn't want him to sacrifice his connection. Yeah. And now looking back, I'm like, okay, I see that there was turmoil in their relationship. So I understand where he was coming from. And I've said it and I love Lexi too. And I also understand her feeling blindsided.

Because in that moment, I was like, what is like, why would he do that? Yeah. Yeah. It's like everyone had the best intention, but everyone was kind of like, I don't know what to do here. Yeah. Everyone was like self-sacrificing for themselves is how it felt like everybody. And even, I mean, just the whole thing. It was just like a mess.

Yeah. And I felt horrible. I was like, oh my gosh. Like I feel like I just messed up. everything. And now me, Justin, and Lexi all go home. Yeah. And so you guys all go home. And then Jeremy and Bailey continue dating. Bailey is like, doesn't know that you guys had this like date where he seemed very invested. The weirdest thing that has ever happened on Bachelor in Paradise in my opinion happens, which is he calls you, which like after you're gone, he calls you. This is so strange.

And he goes like, hey, you should come back. I don't want to be with Bailey. I want to be with you. And says to other people, if Susie comes back, I'll propose on the spot. Now, the whole show hasn't come out yet, like when we're filming this. Right. Currently, Jeremy and Bailey are still on the show and they are like one of the final couples. And it took a long time for Bailey to find out that that call happened. What were your thoughts watching that in real time? So in real time when the phone call happened, I thought it was funny. And I was like, this is so funny. You kind of tell with how you're talking on the phone. You're like, oh, my God, what? Okay. Like, I was so, well, in that moment, I was like asleep. Like, the call woke me up out of sleep.

And I was just like, oh, like, I can't, I can't take like what? Like, I was like, oh, no, no, no. Like, I'm not coming back. And then when it aired, I was like, this is actually like, great TV, you know what I mean? Like, we love a little drama and it's funny, whatever. And then to see how it like became such a big deal, I was like, oh, it's actually no longer funny. I feel really bad. Well, it's not your fault. I hope you know. I know. But it just was like one of those things where I'm like, oh, gosh. Like, again, I feel like I just threw a wrench in everything. And

yeah, I just feel uncomfortable. Because I thought it was like a funny, silly he he. And then I'm like, oh, this actually is like, has been very hurtful. Even if I'm sure it was hurtful when it happened, but I think like the response from the public is equally, if not more painful to relive it and like see it. And to have like all the things said about you. Like I remember being in a similar position when I did end up with Clayton at the final show. Like so many people just said the most nasty things to me for giving him another chance. And it's like at the end of the day, like we are all human. Like we all make mistakes.

Like I have been the villain in someone's story in the real world. it just hasn't been aired on TV. Like, I have done shitty things. Like, we've all either intentionally or accidentally, like, done something that wasn't the best choice. Yeah. I mean, I agree. I've in the terrible accidentally killed his son. Yeah, Ivan the terrible accidentally killed his son. Exactly. No, but it is like so true. It's like, you know, it's, first of all, it isn't, you aren't the bad guy in this story. Like, I understand feeling that way, but you're not. No. You were literally like kind of just a, like somebody else was. putting something on you. Yeah, you were, you were just like an innocent catalyst of just kind of like,

oh, I'm here. And then, oh, okay. Right. That's, it was also the reaction from the other, I want to call them Islanders, even though that's like not really what they are. But like the other people, when that did come out of like, oh, by the way, he called this other girl and was like, please come back. Yeah. And now he's pretending to have this really solid relationship with this other on, who knows really what the deal is there. Right. People were. upset with another person for telling Bailey instead of upset with Jeremy for just doing the thing. That's right. Which was also really strained.

Yeah, that's really weird. I agree. I feel like I'm going to like try to give some context just like from knowing having talked to some people as well. Sure. I feel like on the grand scheme of things, Jeremy should have told Bailey, no doubt. Like that should have happened. but in my opinion he made a mistake and I think maybe there was a minute where their relationship was Rocky she went out on the date with Andrew and he felt I don't know if it's insecure or was like

you know oh I thought we were in this together and you know now you're like going out on this other date whatever however we want to look at it like not the best moment for him right um I think Brian is one of like the funniest reality TV people to come out of paradise like he be great on another show because he does not care. And he is like playing the game and like he doesn't care how things look. Oh, I don't know if he does or not. Maybe he's unaware of how things look. But I appreciate it. And I think it's so funny. And I feel like him telling Bailey, I don't necessarily think it was done as a friend. But I think it was the right thing to do. Sure. Yeah. So I'm like, I respect it. And like, I think I would have also told Bailey. Like I feel like I would have been the one to like.

She had to know. had to know. Like, somebody had to tell her. And I'm so glad that he did. But I do think there, it was, it was like a strategic move on Brian. So I think that's why it rubbed some people the wrong way. Of course. But I did not like that Brian got so much heat when I feel like Jeremy was the one who, like, made a mistake. Yeah. It felt like some misplaced anger. It misplaced anger for sure. And I was like, like, like I was literally chatchy beating like group think afterwards because I'm like, oh, didn't this, I learned about this in psychology 101 in college when like somebody starts like to push a narrative and then everybody like starts to add to it.

And I'm like, did everybody really think that Brian was in the wrong or did, were people afraid to step aside from the group because now there's money involved and people don't want to be ostracized? Yeah. It is definitely like, I think dating shows in general are like such a good example of that. And I think it's kind of like what I was talking about earlier of like the idea of stepping into a house where it's like this person is desirable and you're all fighting over them. Right. That has to like psychologically have some play in your brain where you're like, I guess that person is like really, yeah, really desire. And like if I don't know them as well as I like want to, well, they must be incredible. Yeah. Yes. Yes. That's so true. It's like a really

interesting thing. It is really interesting. There's so much psychology that's like in reality TV where I'm like it is like fascinating. I wish that you would like do a dissertation. But also for I'm just thinking like through all of this and I'm like, I have talked to other people as well. And I think a part of why people didn't think it was such a big deal or they were mad at Brian is because certain people only had like certain bits of information. So like some people knew about the phone call, but we're reassured that it's not a big deal. Some people knew that he had said, oh, I'd propose to her when she comes back. And like some people are saying, oh, that's his sense of humor. Like he's being like dramatic or whatever.

But then out of context when that's repeated. And it's like said, oh, he said he would propose to her. People were like, what, you know, that's. And to us as a viewer, we're like, that's crazy. but so people that were there, not everyone had the full picture. So I feel like in general, there's been so much heat on like everyone there. Totally. And I think a lot of it is misplaced and a lot of it is maybe warranted a little bit.

But at the same time, it's like, okay, everyone made mistakes throughout that whole time. But if people work through it and like people are friends again or whatever, like as the audience, I'm like, let's just everybody be nice. Everybody makes mistakes. We all do shitty things. And as long as they grow from it, then like, cool, let's give them a second chance. Yes. I think even like the context of Jeremy, you know, calling you and blowing things up, it just felt like kind of a response to shame. Like he felt kind of ashamed that he wasn't her first choice in that moment. That could be. And kind of just reacted in a way that was like really reactive.

It's like, okay, if you had taken a second and like taken a breath, this would have been different. But you're in a place where the emotions are hiding. Yeah. And it like, like, There is no breath. No, there's no breath. It feels like it's kind of like an experiment in some ways. It's like, yeah, you don't have the normal, you know, things that you would have to self-regulate. Yeah. Right.

That's true. So, yeah, it is like a hard thing to, like, judge reality people in general when it's like, it's like, you know, we talk about Love Island all the time. And it's like, these people are going stir crazy. Oh, 100%. Like, these people are on an island with nobody else and they are going stir crazy. I cannot imagine it. So, yeah, the emotions are going to be different. I also think from a viewer's standpoint, my personal opinion is like, okay, we can be, I think it's great to be funny online.

I think it's great. I love people's tweets and memes. Like, it is so funny. Even if it's at my own expense, I'm like, cool, bring it on. But I'm like, if we criticize these people and bully these people and send, like, terrible messages to them, then these shows will become so boring. Yep. Like, it's a PSA to viewers to be like, take it, embrace it. laugh at it and be like, these people are toxic and then like drop it and don't threaten people

because even when I was there, I saw and I experienced people just trying to be so like, you don't want to rub people the wrong way. You don't want to rock the boat. And I'm like, that makes such boring TV. Yeah. So like, yes, call people out. Yes, make the funny memes, but like do not terrorize these people because this show will only get more boring, which I feel like I already kind of feel has happened. with this franchise. Yeah, it's cleaned up a little bit. Yes. And I'm like, let us be terrorists on TV. Like, let us be the toxic people that we are that signed up reality TV. Like, there's something wrong with us. Obviously. So, like, just embrace it,

you know? Yeah, it's true. It's, uh, a, a-a-matics said a thing, uh, similarly where she was like, these people let you into, like, their weird relationships. Yeah. Let them live. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Getting something out of this, let them chill. Yeah. Just don't terrorize them. Just don't terrorize people in general unless they're doing something bad to children or animals. Yes. Agreed. You're allowed to have your opinion. You don't need to hurt somebody over.

Oh, yeah. And just like, yeah, people's opinions are always crazy. I know. And I only bring that up because I feel like I have seen so much like craziness online, but I do love to talk the shit. You know what I mean? Like it's funny. Like it's literally so I look at everything that's happened. I'm like it's actually so funny.

Yes. Yeah. Like I was in a four hour car ride getting that call. and then I had stopped on the side of the road and ate like the most random buffet food from a gas station with the driver. And then I took a nap and got this call from Jeremy. I'm like, this is actually so funny. Yeah, that is a crazy like day in the life. Yeah.

Of like, yeah, your schedule was I'm going to get in this really long car ride. I'm going to have this weird gas station buffet. And then get a call that's going to change everybody's life. And then I'm going to go back to sleep. And I did. I actually did document it. And like, and I haven't posted it. Oh, my God.

Maybe I'll send you guys the footage. I don't know. Oh, my God. It would love that. Yeah, that's everything. I would love to see that. So funny. Any, any plans?

Any plans to be the Bachelorette? I don't think they would ever ask me. You should be the Bachelorette. Yeah. You had so many people from this franchise throwing themselves at you. And you've been like, I don't know. Yeah. That's fair.

You would make an incredible Bachelorette. That's so nice. Where are the people? What are doing? I feel like maybe I've like, Maybe I've, I don't want to, I don't know who I'm even saying it to, but I'm like, but maybe I have angered the, the bachelor gods. Yeah, I don't know. Like, I feel like saying no twice might have, you know, I might have dug my own grave on that. Okay, but let me pose. But riddle me this.

But riddle me this. Nick Vile was a bachelor after having some, you know, an interesting bachelor past. And that was an interesting season of the bachelor. So why can't we do? Yeah, I do think, I do think that it would be really entertaining and interesting. I mean, even just as a hook, like, even just as a hook of like, oh, this is the Bachelorette who has turned down people twice. Like the runaway bride. Yeah. That's clickable. Okay, well, we're starting the campaign for Susie to be the next Bachelorette.

Go tweet it. Yeah. Is Twitter a thing anymore? No. Go exit. Go. Yeah. You'll be the next Bachelorette.

And then Carpet Man Pervert Edition will be the next Bachelor after that. season because obviously he'll be on your season. Right. So guys, make it happen. Do whatever you have to do to get Susie as a Bachelorette and then the pervert carpet man as one of his suitors. Yeah. So and if you guys don't do it, I'm going to be so upset. I'm going to literally be so mad. He's so mad if you guys personally don't do it. Okay. Susie, where can the people find you if they don't know where to find you? Oh, you can find me on Instagram. Susie C Evans, TikTok. It's Susie was like. Nice. But yeah, just come hang. Yay. Yay. Thank you so much for me.

hang with us. Yeah, you're wonderful. Really enjoying this season of Bachelor in Paradise, mostly because of you. So good job on that. And until next time, you can check out our episodes early, uncut, extended on our Patreon. You can also check out other content we have over there, and we do movie nights. And Olivia has an announcement. If you are looking at these things behind us, the shelves and going, well, what are those stupid empty shelves doing so empty?

If you want to send us something fucking weird to put on the shelves, we've got a P.O. now. You can send stuff to the P-O-box 644-4-San Fernando Road. P-O. Box 5154, Glendale, California, 9-1-201, C-O-Sid and Olivia. Yeah. Send us something really dumb. Send us something weird and we'll put it on the back. So do that. I'm going to send you guys something. Oh, my God, do it. I've got something for you. Wow, I'm so excited. Can you send me a pervert carpet? Oh, wow. Even better than I thought of. It's a guy. Yeah, guy. And he's going to be there.

And he's coming every time. Through the mail. Yeah, yep, yep. Thank you guys so much for hanging out. And we will see you next Tuesday, freeze frame.