Syd & Olivia Talk Sh*t - We Answered Your Voicemails!

Episode Date: March 31, 2026

This week on the big bad podcast for you...IS YOU!! If you're struggling with OCD or unrelenting intrusive thoughts, NOCD can help. Book a free 15 minute call to get started: https://learn.nocd.com/SO . Remember these episodes now go up a few days early AND with bonus content on Patreon & Fourthwall! https://www.patreon.com/c/syd_and_olivia https://sydandolivia-shop.fourthwall.com/ Chapters: 00:00 | You Called Us, Our Cartoon Third 04:13 | My Cloud, Kidney Stones, New Animals 17:19 | The Multiverse, Angry P*nis, Self Compassion, MILF Manor 27:50 | Pulling Out Hair, Monetize the Cult, Bathroom Guest Book 45:00 | Stand-Up Poem, Kissing Fems, Build Your Sleeve Listen to the show on the go! Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/2j0iQxY9Pf0h4mXEOFxgmk?si=a95ba3e2a2844ec4 This is a 7equis Network Show Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Trauma disguised as entertainment. Okay, I have to rhyme with entertainment. Joking about my arraignment. Is arraignment a word? Okay, great. You do another. Okay, then I do one. Okay.

Audience has almost no one. Walking out would be such fun. And yet we are locked in this room. My microphones become a tomb. I ask you, what's the deal with that? You look at me. Your thoughts are splat. Is that anything?

Is that anything? Hi, everyone. The big bad podcast for you. This is the big bad podcast for you. This is it in Olivia talks. I'm the sad one. I'm the other one. Today we have no other ones.

No other ones. No other ones. Except we kind of have 500 million other ones. Yes, because we asked you. to call us. We asked you to call us and leave us some messages that we can respond to. We asked you to call us and today we are going to respond to your messages. These are messages you left. If we don't get around to one of them, we're going to another time. Yeah. Also, if you do want to leave us any messages in general, yes. Our Google voice number is 805-4193-55. That's 805-419-3555. That's 805-419-35-5.

Okay, queens. Okay, queens. Let's hear your messages. Yes, hey-o. Hi. I was wondering, do you had to compete in a comedy trio competition in Australia, and you had to pick one cartoon character to be your third in your comedy trio, who would it be and why? Ooh.

All right? Thank you. Bye-bye. Thank you for that excellent question. Oh, my gosh. So essentially who would be our cartoon third? Yeah, absolutely. God, there's so many options.

And I think, like, it's different for, if we're competing in a comedy competition, I'm thinking it's like an improv tournament is where my brain goes. I feel like that's it as well. And I have to say, like, immediately my brain goes to Bugs Bunny. Oh, wow. Just because really good with characters, really quick on his feet. Yeah, I mean, he can, like, warp reality in a way that might be really helpful with improv. Really good at drag.

It's really good at drag. Bugs Bunny does some excellent drag. And we have so much respect for it. drag. Yes, we love drag. So yeah, I think that would be like. Bugs Bunny is good. Also a lot of physical comedy. Absolutely. My first instinct was Scrappy Doe because I was like, well, what's a similar vibe? But then it's like, you know, I feel like most of his yes and is going to be instead of like, yes and it's going to be more like lemmy Adam. Yeah. And I do, that is kind of my style of improv. Yeah. And I do love that. Maybe too similar. Maybe too similar. Might be too much, a hat on a hat or

it might work perfectly. The only other thing I could think of. And this is something that Tommy Bo showed us and something that he introduced us to. So I have to shout him out there. Shout out, Tommy. The Mully Grubbs face I think would also be really good. It's a floating face. It kind of is like has no bounds. It's a disembodied floating purple face.

And I think that could be an interesting foil to us because I feel like neither of us. Exactly. And that's and that would be an interesting like, yeah. So either Bugs Bunny, Scrappy Doe, the Mully Grubbs face. Yeah. Or if you guys have another idea, let us know. Pitch more ideas. We're always looking for a third. Yeah, this Australian Improv tournament isn't until next year.

So we do have a very long time. If you guys want to pitch a cartoon character, we can reach out to them. We're always looking for a cartoon third. Yeah. Hi, I was wondering how. Thank you. Exactly. No, and I feel that.

I was wondering how as well. Good afternoon or evening or I don't know, whatever time it is. My name is Derek. Hi, Derek. I've done a couple of bonkicks before this. Yes. But my question would just be, if you were a type of cloud, what type of cloud would you be in wine?

Right. I would be an alpha euclidilus, but like would you be a stratochumulus, a cumulis, stratus? There's just so many types of clouds. Their name, more clouds. The world turns to garbage. Yeah.

I just keep trying to turn into a cloud. So I could flow the way from here. Right. Thank you so much. Oh my God, thank you. Derek. Derek, first off, we love you. Perfect.

Thank you so much for a such a spectacular question. Yeah. And also for listing so many types of clouds. We're actually pulling up some more clouds just so we can see. Oh, what is the one that's spread eagle? Oh. There is a cloud that there's in this diagram of clouds. There's one that is truly starfishing spread eagle.

Oh, hold on. And what is that? Oh, I see what you're talking about. The one that's like going like that. Yeah. And what is that? Because that's me. I can't tell.

Oh, cumulonimbus. Okay. And what does the description say? This cloud has a large vertical length. That's you. You're tall and long. This cloud has a large vertical length that forms huge mountains. Most of these clouds.

Buzzling, buzzwing. Most of these clouds are flat and spread out at the top, sometimes known as the thunderstorm cloud. Oh. Okay. Do you want to be that? one? Yeah, I think mostly because of this photo, where the cloud is like kind of spread aigling it and like putting its arms and legs out, that feels very me. Okay, can I see some of the other clouds?

I feel like I'm either the one over that little castle or the one over the village. Or do you think I'm a flatter cloud? I think I'm a puffier cloud. Do you think I'm a nimbo stratus or cumulus. Um, right. Um, maybe cumulus. Yeah, can we, can we go into cumulus and see what, what that's about? Kind of looks like smoke. Oh, detached, fluffy clouds with clearly defined edges. I actually love that because I've been trying to separate from some of my stronger emotions recently, what with the state of the world. I've been trying to get a little bit detached as a survival mechanism. Um, fluffy, absolutely. That's me. Clearly. defined edges. I do like having a little bit of edge, right?

Right. The bases of these clouds are flat and gray, just like my base. And while the top forms brilliant white bulges that can look like cauliflower, okay, literally, but also you are gluten-free. Yeah, cauliflower rice. cauliflower pizza. Califlower rice. Okay, great. So I'm a cumulus. Great, and I'm a cumulonimbus. Okay, beautiful. Hey, guys. This is Maddie from Florida. Hi, Maddie from Florida. anything. Yes. So from two doctors such as your shawls, I was wondering what I should do about my

persistent kidney pain. I love you guys both. Maw. Maddie, have you been checked for kidney stones? Maddie, yeah, no, you go. Maddie, go off. A, have you been checked for kidney stones? B, have you been checked for kidney stones? B, do you have a UTI? Maddie, are we drinking a lot of water? Do we have? a lot of cranberry in our life. I've heard that that helps a lot. If you drink a lot of water with citrus, like lemon water, sometimes that can help with kidney

pain. I know that sounds super weird, but it is true. Yeah. And a little bit of apple cider vinegar. I would also say, I would also say if we're, if we're having, like, extended periods of intense kidney pain. Girl, go to urgent care. Go to urgent care.

Go to urgent care. Go to urgent care. CT. You get a urine test first, and they tell you, if you're, you're, if you're, you you have a UTI or not. And then... Sometimes they do blood work. Sometimes they do blood work.

Sometimes they tell you you have a really mild UTI and then you're me and it's actually your appendix ruptured, which is different. But then sometimes you need to do a CT to see if you... You need to go to urgent care. Yeah, I'm feeling that for you. And let us know. Keep us updated because I want you to have no kidney pain. Yeah.

And as your doctor, I prescribe you a lot of drugs. Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Fun drugs. Fun drugs. Hey, Deva, it's Jared. Sorry, I'm going in my bathroom. Just wanted to know what your thoughts on moderate to severe plaquesoriasis are.

Right. Do you have any notes, what you're planning on doing about this epidemic? Right. Okay, love you, bye. Oh, my God. That's such a good point. For speaking so fast. Moderate to severe plaquesoriasis.

Do you have any notes? My biggest note is not enough for me. Not enough. Give me some. No, I will say for the amount that I have seen ads for things. for things to resolve this. I have never met someone in real life. Who has that?

Who has told me about their moderate to severe plexerosis. Right, that is true. Then again, nobody really comes to me with their moderate to severe issues. Except for kidney problems just now. Yeah. I would say,

I would say with all of the side effects that those medications can give you for moderate, every time you see a commercial that is a medication for moderate, moderate to severe plaques psoriasis. Yeah. The side effects are like, you might kill your family. Really, really good, like a warm up, warm up phrase.

Moderate to severe plaques psoriasis. Yeah. Moderate to severe plaquesoriasis. Moderate to severe plaquesoriasis. That's like the new red leather yellow leather. Yeah. Yeah. I feel like, first off, does one person have moderate too severe plaques psoriasis?

Sure. Are they grouping people together who have moderate plaquesoriasis and severe. Severex. Like everyone in that. And also what is plaquesoriasis? What do if you have mild plaquesoriasis? Like none of the medications are for- Is that not moderate?

I feel like is moderate. To me, moderate is in the middle. Republican. Yeah. Oh. But I don't. So if you have Republican or severe or severe or severe. Either you're severe or you're a Republican with plaquesiriasis.

Plaxoriasis is a common chronic autoimmune condition. Okay. causing raised, inflamed, itchy patches of skin covered with silvery scales. Oh, no. Oh, it's plaques. Okay. Interesting. There's no, oh.

Okay, so I didn't even know that. Okay, it's immune. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So it's triggered by stress. Okay, so if it's a chronic immune thing, I think it probably could range from moderate to severe. Sometimes you have severe. But like is moderate, can we double check if moderate is?

Oh, that's no fun. It's no fun to get scales. No, I would say it's no fun to get scales. That doesn't sound fun at all. If you have these scales, I feel for you. That sounds like no fun at all. It doesn't sound like fun. But I would also say, my note would be like the medication to lessen this shouldn't make you.

Oh. Shouldn't make you want to K your ass, in my opinion. I think we can even move to the next question. Okay, everything. Hello, Sud and Bolivia. father and father, brother and stepbrother, I need your help. Oh, I love you. So I am designing a completely new world.

This is just a fun little project that I'm working on. And this new world needs some new animals. Yes. I need your big, juicy brains. My name's Leila. Did I even say that? Hi. Hi.

I'm really not sure. My name's Leila. I need some new animals for this completely new world. As usual, there are no wrong answers. Give me what you got. Thank you so much. Love you both to the moon and back. Love you, Leila.

Oh, my God, we love you, Leila. Some new animals. Some new animals for the new world you're created. I love this. I'm not even going to question this new world. No, I'm already there. I'm just adding animals. Okay.

So first off, we've got a reach, right? It's R-E-E-C-H. And what does that do? And that's like the tallest bird you've ever seen. Sure. screams and maybe it's not entirely a bird, right? Because that's already an animal. Maybe it's a bird with, what do you think? A suit. Oh my God, that's such a good point. It's a, it's the tallest bird you've ever seen. And with a suit. And he's like big into crypto.

Yeah. Yes. He's super into crypto. He's into crypto and he's into Kalshi. Yeah. He's always betting on like really bad stuff. He's betting on natural disasters on Kalshi. Yeah. And he's always losing. And he's always losing. Because he's always betting. Because he's betting on, he's betting on, So much dead. Because every day he's like, tsunami, tsunami. It's like there's not going to be a tsunami every day. You're going to lose a lot of money if you're betting for a tsunami every day. And he's doing it in places with no ocean.

Oh my God. No, he's in. Ohio tsunami. He's in Texas. Yeah. It doesn't make sense. He's landlocked. Yeah.

Well, I guess, yeah. So he's, and is there, is that a species and they're all the same or is that just one guy? Um, I think probably there's a bunch of them. No, I think there's a bunch of them. And they're different types. Yeah. Okay. Well, what's another one?

Um, I like the idea of another type of animal being, maybe like let's call it a bong a bong right it's called a bong so that's good so it's so the next one is a bong it's a bong and what is and what does it look like it looks like a bong oh wow so that's why it's

called a bong okay that makes sense it is like a type of bug right it crawls around and you can smoke out of it so it has little bug legs but it's beside that it's a real bong and i think that's so awesome about it is bugs right now are so annoying right Oh my God, that's so true. You see a bug in your house and you're like, get out of here. There's so few uses for bugs. But if there was a bug in your house that could get you high?

No, totally. And it's like I, when my relationship with bugs is like, I respect bugs because I'm like, I know you have to do your thing. And I know like, I know that like bees create all food for us or whatever. Like that's a crazy way to phrase that. It makes me funny for me. Bees pollinate, you know, bugs are useful and important. Bugs are great.

Like. No, when I see like a mosquito in my house, yeah. I usually go like, hey, excuse me. Can you get out? Would you leave? But if it was a bong, yes. I would be like, you can,

you can suck my blood a little bit if I can get a little bit high. Yes. So that's the, that's the like, the relationship. Yes, yes, is that it's like you, I'll suck your blood a little bit.

Yeah. And in return, yeah, you can smoke me. Yeah. So, okay, so it is a bong.

Does it come with weed? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, so it comes with weed. Because it's, it's blood is weed.

Right, it's blood is weed. And it's, and it's transfer, it's created. It turns your blood into nutrients to make its blood weed. Exactly. Yeah.

It's like photosynthesis. Yeah. Yeah. And then I think the last one's just like really flat. Really low to the ground. Completely flat. And I think its name is a question mark. Yes.

It's just a question mark. And it essentially looks like the floor and then it like moves around and you're like, oh, that's interesting. Yeah, it screams. And they're in different like colors and textures. So they do blend in with the floor. It looks like, oh, it's our carpet. And then it will move and you're like, oh, that's interesting. Yeah, 100%.

That's great. So we've got some good animals for your world, Layla. Those are three of them. And thanks for calling in. Yeah, good luck on your new world. Yeah, good luck on your new world and we'd love an invite. Yeah. This time of year, the school calendar really starts to fill up.

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Do you ever feel like your brain just won't stop looking for the next big thing that could go wrong? Do you ever feel stuck in a thought loop, ruminating endlessly and you can't get out? You just can't relax and enjoy life? OCD is a spectrum and there are. so many different symptoms that you might not necessarily first clock as OCD, and I think it's really interesting to look into that. Real OCD is a serious condition where unwanted distressing thoughts called intrusive thoughts get stuck on repeat in your mind. And you feel driven to engage

in certain behaviors called compulsions to try to make them stop. Intrusive thoughts are often disturbing and out of character. They can be about anything, but they often focus on things or people we care about, which makes them really hard to ignore. But OCD is one of the most treatable mental health conditions when you get the right kind of specialized therapy. OCD needs ERP, exposure response prevention therapy, which is proven to be the most effective treatment for OCD. And no CD is the world's leading OCD treatment provider. All of their licensed therapists specialize in ERP. I've done ERP at no CD and it was really, really helpful with my symptoms. Therapy with NoCD is 100% virtual.

Covered by insurance for over 138 million Americans. And includes support in between sessions. So you never have to face OCD alone. To learn more about starting OCD therapy with NoCD, go to noCD.com to book a free call with their team. That's nocd.com. NoCD.com. Hey, Sid and Olivia, calling from Denmark, as you do. I was curious since Branch has mentioned the,

multiverse several times. Are you guys actually into the multiverse at all? Or is it just like a thing that branch has really zeroed in on? Okay, love you, bye. First of all, thank you for calling in from Denmark as you do. As you do. Thank you so much. Truly have no idea.

Yeah. I have no idea. I think we could both benefit to learn a whole lot more about the multiverse. I think I've never, ever even looked into the multiverse, and I don't know anything about the Marvel Cinematic Universe. And I've only ever been dragged to Marvel movies. And I think they're fine. Yeah.

Yeah. I think they're literally fine. Yeah. I think like, absolutely. Yeah. Get your bag. I love the concept of a multiverse. Like, I love the concept of like there are, there are multiple universes or like the.

For sure. I guess. Anything in there like with like like. I just don't know. I don't know. It's like my relationship to the multiverse is my relationship to like football. Like I don't know. Yeah.

And like you guys have so much fun. I have no idea. Yeah. I love it. I love it. I'll learn more about it. You shouldn't learn anything about it. I don't.

tend to because I would rather be doing something else. Thank you for calling in from Denmark. Thank you for calling it from Denmark. Hey guys, Sydney, Olivia, love you guys. Pressing questions. So would you rather? Would you rather every time you get angry, you grow a penis, which then goes away when that anger has passed. Or every time you get sad, you grow an extra limb. And then that also goes away when that sadness has passed. please let me know, really want to know what your answers are. Okay, this is huge.

Really great question. That's an amazing question. Thank you so much for that question. My thought at first is going angry penis. Yeah. Because at least that's under clothing. I'm definitely going angry penis and I can totally explain why. Yeah.

I know what it's like to have limbs. Sure. Right. I don't know what it's like to have an angry penis. So that would be interesting to be interesting. You know, I'm also kind of interested in the growth of it. Like, what does that feel like? Right.

When you grow in the extra limb or when you grow the penis, I wonder if that transformation is extremely painful. Right. And I feel like the penis would almost be less painful because it would be hypothetically smaller than the limb. And I think mine would be really small. I don't think I read as a person with a big dick. I think I would have a really, really small one. So it would just feel like a pimple arising. And I don't think it would be a problem.

The thing I worry about is like when it goes away, right? Is that... You just pop it. You just pop it. And would you do that for the limb too? You'd just pop it. Pop it? Or you just pop it.

Yeah, I'm going to go angry penis because I think that would give me an experience I haven't had before. I mean, I also haven't had five limbs before either. Fair. But, yeah, I would say that, like, when I get angry also for, like, shorter periods of time, I think. So it wouldn't be as permanent. And, yeah, underclothes. and you just pop it. And usually when I'm naked in front of another person, I'm not usually angry.

Yeah. And if I want to get angry in a sexual way to experiment, if I'm like, well, hold on, let me see if I can use this penis sexually, right? I could just open my phone and look at the news. During sex. Yeah. Which I do anyway. Right. Which I always do anyway.

Yeah, I'm going to go with angry penis. I'm going to go with angry penis. And thank you so much. That's a really interesting. question. I've always been a people pleaser. Wait, the first like three seconds, wait, the first like three seconds, you're underwater. I've always been a people pleaser. That's awesome.

And I'm starting to grow a little bit out of that. Yay! If you have any tips to continue to grow out of it and to stop trying to. to be perfect for everyone I meet. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. I think one time I saw like a tweet or something that was like,

oh yeah, you're a people pleaser. Name one person you've pleased or something. And I do think about that often because sometimes when we are in our own heads being like, this is what this person wants. Yeah. You just don't know. Yeah. So you actually might be pleasing nobody including yourself.

No, literally. And that happens to me so often. often where I'm like, well, this person needs me to do this probably. And it's like, well, okay, but you don't know that. And also, I think, I think, okay, if look into parts work, I think parts work is cool, like internal family systems is cool because you can look at the different parts of yourself and there's like the part of you that's like the inner child part of you. Think about that. And it's like, if you parent that part of you and you're like, you don't need to be perfect. You don't need, like, you wouldn't be cruel to a child, right? If you were a parent,

you wouldn't be cruel to yourself, but why are you cruel to yourself as an adult? And my friend once said, like, find opportunities to practice self-compassion because I feel like, okay, I feel like that's like a way to say it. That's like not so pressury of like, be nice to yourself and that's amorphous. But if you're like, I'm looking for opportunities to practice self-compassion, it doesn't necessarily need to be like, oh, I'm going to go at this by not, you know, not trying to people please. It's like, try to be compassionate to yourself first. and then, you know, and then maybe, maybe that's good. Is that anything? Yeah, yeah.

No, I definitely think just staying in touch with your gut is important, like, knowing how you feel before you do something. Even like, it's just important to keep, keep, stay connected with your feelings. Yeah. Hi, Sydney, Olivia. My name is Ella, and I'm actually currently driving back to Texas. But anyway, I'm from Texas. My best friend's name is Kat, and we're starting a podcast. And it's going to be based off y'alls.

It's called Chaos Party of Two. That's a great title. And we wanted your ideas on segments we should do, because right now we're just taking topics and talking shit, basically. But we wanted to hear y'all's opinion about what either topics or what segments would you do. because I might bring that girl boss or girl floss, just by the way. I hope you all have a great day. Thanks. Yeah.

I think honestly, the best, in my opinion, the best segments are things that are underthought. Like anything that you're like, I came up with a title and now I have to create something around it. And it ends up being, I think, the most fun. Yeah. Like when we had Austin on and he was trying to explain Uncle Gangers, it made me laugh so hard because it was just like, this is so nothing. anything. And there's something so funny about being of like bringing something to other people and being like, this is what it is. Yeah. You kind of have nothing. Yeah. Yeah. And you can kind of come up with more fun stuff through that. Yeah. I love that. Yeah. I think think of it in the in the in the term of like

making a game to play. Yeah. It's very sleepover. Yeah. Like what would be a sleepover game for you and then have a and then have a sleep over. But don't record yourself asleep unless that's what your thing is. And that could be a fun podcast. Well, that you can be. make money doing that on like live stream, but I don't want you to and I don't want to. Yeah, I think if you treat it kind of like a madlibs puzzle, yeah. You're like, okay, adjective noun, verb, you could find some really fun segment from that. Absolutely, yeah. I think, yeah, underthink it and you might actually come up with something really fun. Nothing is anything. Nothing is anything.

Howdy. So we have fantasy bracket Love Island. Yes. When are we getting fantasy bracket Milk Manor? Oh, that's such a good point. That's such a good point. Wow. Wait, that's actually so true. It's like I would say like, well, not that many people have seen Milf Manor, but I don't know that any of our audience has either also seen Love Island.

Yeah. No, that's fair. That's fair. So many people will be like, I've never seen this show, but I'm watching, I guess. Yeah, absolutely. No, fantasy racket Milf Manor would be crazy because you'd have to figure out like who's, like, would you bring on real mother and sons, like real fictional mother and sons. You'd have to, right?

Or would you be like, oh, yeah, yeah. would you be like, oh, like, you know, this cup is the mother of this smaller cup. Sure, sure. And I guess you could do both. I guess the answer is you'd do both. And also right now with Age of Attraction out on Netflix, which is, of course, a show about age gaps. I've just started it. And it's insane.

I, like, am actually afraid to watch that one. So the big thing about Age Big Attraction is it's a show where the experiment is like, what would happen if these 50-year-old men saw 22-year-old women? And the answer was like, they'd go a woo? God. Like, I don't know. There's like, it's so funny. It's like, we're asking this interesting age-old question of how would it work if an old

old man was with a young, young woman? It's like, well, could it possibly end in like, everyone's so traumatized? Could that possibly be what it is? Like, they do have some reverses. Like, they do have some older women with younger men. But it's mostly older men. From what I've seen so far, I don't come from me. I've only seen a couple episodes.

So, and do they know? it's like they don't know the ages quote unquote but like obviously they do they know I mean do they hear their voices or do they see them they see them okay so you know like they act shocked and like I will say some of them are like a couple years off what I would have guessed but most of them are kind of pretty much what I would have guessed

you can kind of tell what generic age some age range someone is probably in if you can look at them and speak to them yeah but with the rise of that show I do think Milf Manor needs to take a like you know start publicizing more of the old episodes like marketing it more because that show, you know, is in the same vein. We got to get Barbie on here from Milf Manor season. Yes. Love Barbie.

Yes. I met Barbie at a wedding. Love Barbie. Insane. Insane to meet a character from Milf Manor at a wedding. Yeah. Absolutely. Yes.

But the question, the answer is, yes, we should be doing a fancy bracket in Luff Manor. Maybe we can do that on the Patreon. We'll see. Yeah. That would be kind of fun. Hey, Sid and Olivia. I need some advice from some possible. former feral children

I teach in a classroom with some very young kids and there is a girl who thinks that's absolutely hilarious to rip out other people's hair and keep it. Right. And this is not something

I've experienced before. So I was just looking for either some advice on how to get her to stop doing that or how to be funnier than her and embarrass her from doing it further. Thanks. Bye. I'm going to give you

most of this answer because you deal with kids more than I do, but I will say both my parents are teachers. And right now my dad has a thing he does. They're elementary school teachers. And my dad will say to a kid who's acting out like, hey, okay, hey, guess what? It's time to be a big boy. And apparently that makes them all laugh really hard because it's like they're a little bit too old for that. But like it's kind of like cuts them down to be like you're acting immature, but also it's kind of like a funny thing.

How old are those kids? Fourth grade, fifth grade? Yeah. So like 10? Yeah, something like that. Where it's like if you say like, hey, it's time to be a big boy, it's like embarrassing but kind of funny because it's like, oh, I sure, I already am. Like, I'm not six.

I'm 10. Yeah. Pulling hair out. Pulling hair out and keeping it is. Feels six. What's so weird is that like I wasn't a feral child, but I am a feral adult. So. Yeah.

Pulling hair out and keeping it. is so crazy. Keeping it is crazy. I will say I have had an experience with a child who was three who used to chew on hair a lot. She'd find hair around and she would chew on it. No, I hate that so much. I immediately hate that. And so finding it is so bad. But I started, we started making it like a really big deal when she would put it in the garbage when she'd find hair and she'd go, can we put this in the trash? And we'd be like, that's a great place to put it. That is a great, Not your mouth. But like, how do you...

She started being so proud of herself when she was putting in the trash. She was like, can we put this in the trash? I wonder if there's a substitution we can use for other people's hair. Like, I wonder if there's like... Angel hair pasta. Angel, if you just give her a big thing of angel hair pasta. Yeah, pulling kids hair out and then keeping it makes me go like, are we keeping it for a nest? Like, what are we keeping it for?

For probably being ill. Yeah. Like, what's the use for it? And can we replace that with something else? Maybe doll hair? Can we have some dolls? that are like specifically for pull the hair out? Yeah, I guess the question is like, what is this kid getting from?

Is it like, is it the pulling that's, that they're really liking? Or is it the keeping? Or is it both equally? And I don't know. Yeah, I have questions. So I have some follow-up question. Yeah. Call back.

Hey, Sidney Olivia. This is Graham, one of your Patreon supporters. Hi, Graham. I wanted to first think you both for your podcast, of course, but especially Olivia, you have been talking about some things recently on the podcast regarding some of your mental health struggles that I really think are important to talk about, but also it's been a great way for me to understand the struggle with someone very near and dear to me is going through. And so my question is more for Olivia, which is when you find yourself struggling

with compulsions or anything regarding OCD, whether it's checking or it's health anxiety, what are some of the things that you have found to be helpful from the people in your support system? I know obviously direct communication and asking is probably going to yield the best answer, but I was curious if there's anything that has come up for you that maybe you didn't expect to be helpful, that ended up being really helpful or if it just is kind of something that you see what happens as you go and try out different things. Regardless, thank you. If you do end up answering this question, I appreciate it.

I appreciate you guys' podcast. It is like the highlight of my week every single time I see it posted in the Patreon and even before that one was on YouTube. So keep it up. You guys are a light and my life as well as much as many others. So thank you so much for that. Talk soon, sharks. Oh, my God.

Okay, well, first off, that's so sweet. Yeah, first off, okay, so like every human being, obviously, is different. Different things are going to work for different people. A thing that I've learned with OCD is it kind of comes down to, like, not being able to tolerate uncertainty, but the way to get better and make the loop less strong is to force yourself to tolerate uncertainty. So when someone is checking with you, when someone is reassurance seeking, you know, you might want to reassure them, like, no, this bad thing isn't going to happen. Or like, no, you didn't do this thing.

That just encourages the OCD brain to like keep checking, keep like asking because that relief makes the loop stronger. Something that's like, I think sometimes it's nice to just be like, I see you, I witness this. even if I can't do anything to directly fix it, like I, you're allowed to have these thoughts and feelings and they don't define anything. We don't have to get super, super hardcore into them because like sometimes when you try to argue or like talk through logically something with someone who's struggling with like an OCD loop or like a compulsive, you know, rumination spiral, it like you just dig farther and farther into the thing and you're arguing with a part of their brain that can't really logically fix it and just like needs. to, is just like, you're arguing with a part of them that isn't being completely, I'm trying to think of how to say this. Like, like, like, sometimes it's, it's good to release the topic and, and just let there be discomfort instead of trying to assure them that X, Y, Z, because then it doesn't, if you

have OCD, being assured once doesn't work. like you'll come back and ask the same question the next day or five minutes later or whatever because your brain's like, are you sure? Are you sure? Are you sure? And it's like, what can you do? I also think the thing that works really well with me that may or may not work for anyone else with people I'm with is sometimes using humor like really, really helps. I have been in now multiple relationships where I'll ask a crazy question reassurance seeking and I'll be like, you know, like, I'll ask something like, does everyone secretly hate me? And they're all, you know, they are all talking right in my back and like, they just don't want me to die. So they're like,

you know, being really, you know, they're pretending I'm, I'm okay. Or like, I'll ask, like, am I the ugliest person in the world or like, am I the worst person in the world? And I've had now multiple relationships where my boyfriend will be like, yeah, absolutely. Like, like, I'll ask like a crazy question. He'll be like, yeah, for sure. And, That makes me laugh, which then like jogs me out of the craziness because I'm like looking at how insane what I just asked was. And it's like funny because it is so crazy. So that is a thing that works for me of just like responding with some sort of humor, jogging them out of it via via something unexpected or just like agreeing with how insane they're being as like a joke in a way that's like clearly a joke. This isn't medical advice.

This is just a thing that works for me. I don't know if that was helpful, but I think that you're awesome for caring about what you can do for this person that's close to you who has OCD. And you're wonderful. And if they can get some exposure response prevention therapy, dude, that shit is very helpful. Yep. That's me. That's my answer.

I'm going to a convention next week. And I want to know how. to look and covort myself as a hot person without also looking like the wrong kind of crazy person. Love it. If you have feedback, let me know and have a good night. Oh my gosh. A hot person, but not the wrong kind of crazy person? Yeah.

Okay. I would say Riz is what makes people hot, right? Like having just like a super like, this is what I'm doing and I'm hot right now, just like that makes. makes people hot. Yeah. Also, you're going to a convention. Yeah. So I'm kind of like, does this mean you're cosplaying?

I think this sounds like cosplaying. But I also am like, I don't know if there really is like, I think the wrong type of crazy person at a convention is someone who's like enacting harm, like or like being not respecting boundaries. Or someone who like didn't come ready to have fun. Yeah. Like I think, I don't think you need to. Like I feel like if you're the only person not cosplaying at a cosplaying convention,

that's the person who's like weird. Yeah, I feel like you've got a, you can take that layer of judgment off of it. Yeah. You just have to pick something that you're like, oh, this, this feels right. Yeah. Because then you'll put off the right energy. If you put, you know, if you put energy or effort into whatever you're cosplaying as or whatever, you know, like fun makeup you're doing or fun, you know, go look at tutorials for inspiration. I love doing that.

I love like just kind of putting different things in my brain and being like, oh, I kind of like this. Look, trying out different things and find something that makes you feel the most confident out of all the things you're trying. And then go in and just be like, dude, I'm literally hot today. And people will be like, yes, you are, because it's all vibe. It's all Riz. I don't know. Yeah. Yeah.

I also think sometimes, I mean, you said like the wrong type of crazy person. Sometimes crazy is hot. That's so true. Often. You can't actually be afraid of. the wrong type of crazy because if you are, someone's probably going to be like, this is pretty hot. Potentially the wrong kind of person. But that's not what you ask. Yeah. You're going to crush it, though. Good luck. And I hope I hope you find something really fun to wear. Yeah. I think you're going to

be totally great. And also, yeah, this is like this is going to be, it's a convention. It's with like minded people. You're going to be surrounded by people who already are going to be like, hell yeah. Yeah. And also, everyone will be thinking exactly what you just said as well. So like, don't, don't, don't put anyone on a pedestal. Everyone is, everyone's nervous. Everyone's freaked out all the time. And you're going to crush it. Uh, hello, Sidylivia. I just started Twitch streaming and I'm literally concerned that I started a cult. Oh, everything. What do I do about that? Right. And, uh, how do I monopolize and monetize this cult that I've accidentally started? Thank you so much. Oh, I have follow up questions. What do you mean? Uh, so you start, okay, so you

accidentally started a call on Twitch. On Twitch. On Twitch. Yeah, Twitch streaming. Okay. So, so Oh, be careful with that power. I guess my big thing is be really careful with that power. Yeah, use your power for good. I assume you will, but... I mean, what if you just, like, continuously keep telling everyone, like, hey, guys? It's going to be okay. It's going to be okay, but also, I'm just like you.

I'm just kind of like you. Yeah. So we don't need to make this a thing. Yeah, I'm not God. I'm not God. I'm just person. Unless you want to lean into it. Yeah, that's true.

If you want to monetize this cult, plenty of people do. Yeah, people, it's real easy. You just have to be like, well, what do people do to monetize a cult? Well, nexium, they did classes, right? Yeah, they make you feel like you need something that they have. Yeah, and you want to get, it's like, it's kind of like, the only thing I can relate it to is like karate where it's like you want to move up to the next belt or something.

So you're like, I guess I'll take another class. Yeah. This is actually the wrong advice. This is advice you didn't ask for, which is how to monetize your cult. You said, what do I do now that I accidentally have a cult? Well, you said both. You said, what do I do? And how do I monetize it?

Sure. Also, yeah, Matt Mercer's episode was really good. He helped me really differentiate between cult and community, which is good. It was, you know, like with cult being harmful and community not. So you can really go either way, you know? Yeah, I guess you're now at, like, the past. where you get to decide. Yeah, you're at the fork in the road. Yeah, you get to decide if you want to go cult or community. Yeah, which is a really common past. Yeah. And this is a segment called cult or

community. So you have to decide now, do you want to be a cult or do you want to be a community? Yeah. Either answer is right. Yeah, either answer is right because whatever works for you is beautiful, even if it's starting a cult for you. Um, congratulations on your cult. Yeah, truly. I guess, you know, you have to have some major Riz to start a cult. Yeah, absolutely. Yeah. Absolutely. Yeah. I guess. Absolutely. I guess. After 19 years, they're back.

Frankie Munis, Brian Cranston, and the rest of the family reunite in Malcolm in the middle, life's still unfair. After 10 years avoiding them how and lowest demand Malcolm be at their anniversary party, pulling him straight back into their chaos. Malcolm in the middle, life's still unfair. A special four-part event, streaming April 10th on Hulu on Disney Plus. This time of year, the school calendar really starts to fill up. Spring activities, testing season. and that final push toward the end of the year.

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Hi. So question, what are your thoughts on a bathroom guest book? Because I like to have a guest book in all of my apartments to make sure my guests have a good bathroom experience and, like, give me any feedback they want, and also to entertain them if they're in there for a while. So I like to ask them questions, like, be honest, did you poop or pee? Or, like, what app are you scrolling on right now? And some of my friends think is, weird. But I think it's like perfectly normal and fine. So I just want to know your thoughts on this. Thanks. I will say based on the way you have said this, I think it's done in such a cheeky fun way that this is normal and good. I think this is cute and fun and funny. However, I do think when you go to like places with a guest book, like not weddings, but like hotels or Airbnb places that like there are offices with like a bathroom guest book. And that's kind of. And that's kind of. of weird. That's so nice. It's weird to be like, let me log that I was in here. That's strange. Yeah. I would say like what makes it funny in this context is like that it's kind of, it's like a strange. I would say, I think it's great. And if anyone has a problem with it, well, they're not being forced to use it, right? Well, of course they are. I do think a bathroom guest book is really funny. And I do also like the idea that you ask them questions because that's like making them kind of.

stay in there for a while. It's like a quiz. Yeah, it's like a personality test. Yeah. And also, like, you're supposed to put all of the most interesting things you own in the bathroom because that's when people are the most bored. So a bathroom guest book is pretty interesting. So that's a good thing to have in there. Absolutely. The concept of logging poop and pee, love it. Yeah. I mean, I think it's a thing people aren't asked a lot. And I think let's spice up. Let's spice it up. Is there a number three? There's a number one. I think everyone jokes about what a number three is. Do they?

Yeah, like, or at least I do. Like, it could be... I've never heard you joke about a number three. Maybe it's just in my head. But like, number three to me is like throwing up. Right. Or, I don't know. One is P, two is poo, three is throw up?

I don't know. Or maybe zero is throw up. Is that anything? I don't know. Zero is operator. Okay, interesting. Yeah, bathroom guest book great. Yeah, you can also come up with more numbers.

want. You can be like- Or more guest books. Yes. Yes. For different parts of your house. Yeah. Like a ring camera guest book. If you're going to drop a package off or a door dash, you have to sign the guest book. Yeah. And say like what if you're shitting or pissing. And then like, you know, then you have a guest book for your kitchen and you have a guest book. And you can be like, are you shitting or are you pissing? Wait. Bedroom guest book is really funny, especially if you're doing a lot of fucking. If you're doing a lot of fucking with a lot of different people and you ask them to sign the, the guest book in your bedroom. as the as funny as ever. That's really funny. That's like insane. And then you give them ratings afterward and they have to see everyone's previous rating and be like, oh no, what's my rating

going to be? Wait, this is a great idea for like a Samantha on sex in the city. Okay, everything. If you're Samantha on sex in the city, you need a bedroom guest book. Yeah. Yeah, this is great. Gosh. It's so true. It's only she was on and just like that and I was a writer on and just like that. Wait, that's so true. Because that would be an episode. We should just go to her house. Samantha gets a bedroom guest book. That's a person. That's a person. Perfect episode. That's really good. Well, you don't like it. You're yawning. You don't like this episode at all. That was a violent yawn. That was crazy. You're like, bedroom guest books?

That overtook my... Yeah, I thought bedroom for a second. I was like, oh, sweepie. Hi, Finn and Olivia. I was wondering if you guys could improvise a stand-up poem on the spot. Okay, bye. A stand-up poem. Maybe a poem about standing up? Or just about like a poem like from the point of view of a stand-up comedian. Yeah, sure. Okay.

Yiddie? Yeah. I'll do the first line. Okay. Trauma disguised as entertainment. Okay, I have to rhyme with entertainment. Joking about my arraignment. Is arraignment a word?

Okay, great. You do another. Okay, then I do one. Okay. Audience has almost no one. Walking out would be such fun. And yet we are locked in this room. My microphones become a tomb.

I ask you, what's the deal with that? You look at me. Your thoughts are splat. Is that anything? Is that anything? Yeah, that went hard. My microphone is a tomb went hard. Wow, my microphone is a tune.

Yeah. Yeah. It's a lonely life sometimes. Yeah. Being a stand-up. Not having that experience at all. Yes. Yeah.

No, and I'm only saying that from like being like, I've seen that in movies. I've seen that in movies. It's a lonely life. It seems kind of sad. Wow. Yeah. Yeah. So that was a poem about stand-up.

Damn. Hey, so from the sounds of your podcast, from the sounds of you, y'all have dated co-workers, bosses, camp counselors, close friends, not so close friends, people that are way older than you, etc.

Would you ever date a fan? Mostly asking sick. Okay, thank you, bye. That was awesome. Oh, that was so awesome. Well, I'm off the hook for this one. Um, I thought I was going to be a read at the beginning.

They were just like, so you've done this, you've done this, you've done this, you've done this. So are you going to kiss me? Kind of it was. So you've done this, you've done this. That's sort of what, yeah. Would I, would I ever do you feel? I am in a loving relationship. However, if I wasn't, I think, honestly, I think it would be too weird.

I think it would be really weird. I would think it would be really weird to meet someone who even had listened to me talk before and then forming a relationship from there is like a kind of an imbalance. It's like a weird place to start from. Although, like, I don't know. I don't know. I guess I don't know because I'm not single. So I guess I don't know. And also, so I guess A, that means that when you meet Sid in real life, you have to pretend you don't know who she is if you want to date her.

Sure, I guess so. I would say that like for me, even though I was not asked this question, so it doesn't matter. No, go, go for it. I like, I feel like if, if, I feel like everyone can be a fan of each other. Yeah. Of like, if someone's like, oh, I really like what you do and I'm, and I really like what they do, then like, that's awesome. Yeah, yeah, no, that's great. But if it's like, I really like what you do and and I don't.

like, and it's not like a mutual thing, then that feels like a power imbalance. Right. Yeah. No, I think like, yeah, it is like a weird, it's a weird like parisocial thing, right? Like where it's like there have been people who I've seen on the internet before and then like reached out to and like have probably gone on a date with at some point when I was thinking, God, I'm like trying to remember. Throwback. I'm sure there are people that I was like, oh yeah, I think you're great. Yeah.

And like have, you know, gone out with based on just being like, oh, this seems like a person I'd be interested in. So I guess it's hard to say, right? Yeah. If somebody's like, oh, we would have a vibe that would work, I guess. Never say never. Never say never. Never say never. Yeah, never say never is my answer to that.

Hashtag never say never. Never say never. And thank you for saying that. Hashtag Coney 2012. Hi, I said, Olivia. My name is Madison. Hi, Madison. Hi, Madison.

My question for you all is, I have a whole. sleeve of my arm or my whole arm is tattooed and food and drink related tattoos. I have a mushroom pizza, I have a shrimp, I have cocktail cherries, I have a Miller High Life bottle, you get it. My question for you is, is what is a great food tattoo to get? What would you get? What do you think I should get? yeah, I want to hear y'all answers.

Oh my God, now I'm so hungry. Madison, I have so many questions. First of all, I want to know if you're a chef or if you're like a home cook or if you're just a fan of food. Yeah. I think a themed sleeve is so cool. I've always wanted a lemon slice because I always love a lemon. With water. With water, with anything.

I love a lemon. And I do think a lemon slice is a really cute tattoo. I think all citrus, especially with like fine line is like. like really cute. I would also say that like, like, this is something I feel like would be more on you, but like olives. Yeah, I do love an olive. Like olives are super cute.

Olives are good tattoos. Olives with like a little toothpick, but like that's very cute. I think, yeah, anything in the world of like a cocktail, like a glass of wine like is such a cute tattoo. Yeah, those are cute. I would also say, yeah. Yeah. Because those are so like dainty.

Yeah. What if you also mixed it with like turkey leg or like rotissory chicken? Rotisserie chicken would be an amazing one. Something that's like heavy and not necessarily cute. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Could be a fun option.

Yeah. Like, um, or even just something so complicated, like an eggs Benedict. Yes. That's so complicated. Like a tattoo of an eggs Benedict would be like, whoa. So complicated. Yeah. Um, you have to like do the Canadian ham.

Yes. With Canadian bacon. Is that what it's called? Yes. I think a sardine is fun. So many people get boxes of sardines. Yeah. That's like really cute.

Really cute. Um, but I do like the idea of getting something that's kind of a heavy larch, like a chicken pot pie. A chicken pot pie. Yes. And then people will be like, it's a pie. It's a chicken pot pie. And then there's like a little slice in it and you can see the peas falling out and it's like kind of gross. Uptown mac and cheese from Granville. Something so niche that no one will know about. Yeah, I think you should do kind of a balance between like cute food items and food items that is chili. That is chili. That's a bowl of chili. So that's good. Yeah, bowl of chili. Bowl of chili with saltines. Yeah. Yeah. Clam chowder. And then maybe like a mushroom pizza. So that's so that's good. Yeah, bowl of chili. Bowl of chili. Bowl of chili with saltines. Yeah. Yeah. Clam chowder. And then maybe like a. Um, um. And then maybe like, um. a chef shouting order up. Right.

You could get that on your back really huge. And you could do it like how they do at Buildabair where you can do a button and then you hear the sound. Oh, you get a button in your skin. You get a button in your skin. And when you click it, it goes order up. So your back will have like a huge chef and like a protruding lump. It's Chef Boyardie. Yeah.

And it's Chef Boyardee. Oh my God. If you got a Chef Boy RD tattoo like a can of Chef Boy RD. A chef boy RD can. SpaghettiOs. SpaghettiOs. Yeah. SpaghettiOs.

Spaghetti is Chef Boy RD? I don't. No. No, those are different. I couldn't tell you if there was a gun to my head. Chef Boyardee can of food. Of food. So that's my answer. Yeah, that's beautiful. Raw steak. Raw steak. Raw steak. Trout. Foulet of trout. No, spaghettios are not chef boyardy. They're Campbells. They're different. Okay. Well, guys, that's a great. I think you should do a big chicken or something. Yeah, like a huge rotisserie, like several rotisserie chickens in a big tote bag. Yeah. Guys, that was so fun. Thank you so much for calling in. We love your calls. Yeah, we love your calls.

We're going to do this more. We have, we have, if you called in and you're like, ah, where was mine? Don't you worry. We do have more. We do have more and we will be doing more. Yeah, and let us know if you like this kind of thing. We can always answer more on our Patreon.

So go check out our Patreon. And it's been lovely chatting with you. And now you have to give us your number. so we can call you. Leave your number in the comments. Leave your number in the comments. Don't do that. Don't actually do that. Don't never do that. If someone asks you to do that in real life, you say, no. Unless you get a Google voice and you're like, well, I mean, doesn't really do. If you get a Google voice, leave that number in the comments. And I'll call. Yeah, I'll call your Google voice. Why not? Why not? Fuck it.

Thank you for being here. Join the Patreon if you haven't. We're actually adding. so much more shit to it. We are going to just buckle down and make this Patreon a very fun engaging community. So come fuck around with us. And until next time, we will see you next Tuesday. Goodbye. Freeze frame. Freeze frame.

This time of year, the school calendar really starts to fill up. Spring activities, testing season, and that final push toward the end of the year. It's a great moment for kids to stay focused and build confidence in what they're learning. That's where Ixel comes in. I Excel is an award-winning online learning platform that helps kids truly understand their schoolwork, from math and reading to writing and science. It's designed for pre-k through 12th grade, with personalized interactive content that adapts to each child's level and pace. I-XL makes it easy to stay on track with instant feedback and clear explanations, skills organized by grade level, and simple progress tracking. It fits into even the busiest spring schedules. It's also trusted nationwide. In fact, I-Excel is used in 96 of the top 100 school districts in the U.S.

Make an impact on your child's learning. Get I-Exel now. Listeners can get an exclusive 20% off I-XL membership when they sign up today at Iexel.com forward slash today. Visit Ixl.com forward slash today to get the most effective learning program out there at the best price.