Table Manners with Jessie and Lennie Ware - S4 Ep 9: Mel B

Episode Date: December 5, 2018

It’s not very often you can say you’ve got a Spice Girl in your kitchen... but this week’s guest and season finale is none other than Ms Melanie Brown. Mum pulls out a winning roast dinner whilst Mel ogles over her stuffing and we ply my daughter with cake so she doesn’t interrupt the juicy parts of Mel’s tumultuous story. Yorkshire puddings, fainting goats (?!?) and which Spice Girl has the worst table manners are all on the menu.Table Manners returns for a Christmas special on December 19th - but for now Spice up you life!For more information about Women's Aid visit www.womensaid.org.uk Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

mum yes darling we won an award this week i know you won the award darling there is no i in team darling i know there is no i in table manners yeah that's clever but darling you did win the award and i was very very proud and you looked beautiful and you spoke beautifully. I don't know, I spoke horridly and nervous. It's really nerve-wracking speaking to people when you're not under the influence and singing your songs. You were one of the two women, only two women that won. Yeah, it was a bit of a joke that. But we are so thankful.

Thank you so much to the Audio Production Awards that gave, well, me the New Voice Award. So yes, you are listening to the new voice of broadcasting. My name is Jessie Ware and here is my mother, Lenny Ware. I was going to go gold. Why gold? Because she got the gold award. Well, I did get the gold award, but whatever.

It was amazing and just a big shout out to everyone that's involved on this podcast and everyone who's come on and taken the chance to be cooked for by us and basically pounced on yeah it's not i mean i don't mean physically but we've definitely you know we've paxmaned a few people i don't think so darling you don't think no not with our luxurious cooking i thought when i asked j Jay Rayner if he would do Greg Ollis, I thought that was pretty Paxman. Okay. Anyway, thank you so much. We're so chuffed to get our first award for Table Runners, so thank you.

Right, it's Sunday. I'll tell you what I want, what I really, really want. So tell me what you want, what you really, really want. I want a, I want a, I want a really, really, really want a zig-a-zig. That's the clue. You'll know who it is because it will be, you've chosen this podcast to listen to because of the name. We have Scary Spice coming over to ours for a Sunday roast. For a roast.

For a roast. We know Scary Spice likes a roast because she talks about it a lot in her new book, Brutally Honest. I feel like she references a roast, a roast chicken, maybe more than the Spice Girls, actually. But we're so excited. We've got a Spice Girl. I can't believe it. I know.

I'm actually going to ask to get a picture with my daughter. I think so. With the scary spice. With your daughter's scary hair. They'll match. What is on the menu today, Mum? Well, it's roast. It's roast chicken because she loves roast chicken.

Yeah. But because... We may have been a bit scared and we kind of let her choose the menu because we wanted to get it right. And we wanted to make her happy. And I've done Yorkshire puddings because she's from Yorkshire

and she loves Yorkshire puddings. So although they don't traditionally go with a roast chicken, I think she loves Yorkshire puddings. So although they don't traditionally go with a roast chicken, I think everyone loves Yorkshire puddings. She's got Cheryl around to do her Yorkshire puddings. Her Yorkshires and with her meat cooking for hours to make the gravy. So we've got roast chicken stuffed with my kind of made up stuffing, which is with pecans and apricots and thyme and rosemary and lots of herbs and it smells lovely and I made red cabbage braised red cabbage your favorite but it's a bit marmite because our brother hates your

red cabbage and I think it's the best thing in the world I do as well and Alex has done his special roast potatoes which are usually the best crispiest roast potatoes in the world. And then we've got some chipolatas. And of course, the meat comes from the wonderful ginger pig. Yeah, thank you so much. Thank you. Ginger pig pudding. She says she's not a pudding person.

Yeah, but I think everyone likes a bit of a pud after a nice roast. I think we've done this quite selfishly for ourselves because it's getting near to Christmas. So I've done a panettone bread and butter pudding. Lovely. Have we got cream to serve with it? We've got cream. So panettone bread and butter pudding to serve afterwards. I just finished her book and there was a chapter about her saying goodbye to her father

and who passed away, I think, last year. And I was sobbing in bed and I have lots and lots of questions to ask her. I hear she likes to talk about fannies quite a lot, so I'm going to go straight in there. Fannies? Yeah. Why? I think she calls them something else. What's she called?

Pussies. I think that's her choice of word get on well with donald trump i don't know she uses what my daughter calls it a fan fan we'll talk about her fan fan rejuvenation she writes about wow yeah but so excited to have melanie brown on the podcast for a Sunday roast with a Pinot Noir. It's always wonderful what you're going to be saying. It's now 1.45. We've been waiting for 45 minutes.

And I don't think Scary Spice realises what an impatient person and not very understanding of late people I am. So apologies to listeners that may have to hear us go straight into the nitty gritty through slurping of the gravy and chomping on the chicken because the chicken is done and I don't want to sacrifice the chicken. Mum, who are you texting?

I'm not. I'm deleting my messages. Oh, this is what we're doing now. We're doing admin. I've been waiting so long. But I'm trying to stay sober. And now the baby's going to wake up too. So this is going to be a fun house. It's going to be a madhouse. Jessie, does she like Primitivo or is it Chateauneuf-du-Pape she likes? She likes Chateauneuf-du-Pape and Pinot Noir. Have you got Chateauneuf-du-pap she likes chateauneuf-du-pap and pinot noire have you got chateauneuf-du-pap i've got primitivo she says

in her book that she can tell an expensive bottle of wine from a cheap one this is expensive should we see if she can tell that it's an expensive bottle of wine it's not gonna be any wine left yeah there's not gonna be any wine.10 quid. Mum, that is not an expensive bottle of wine. £10 quid is not an expensive... Hello. Hi, sorry about later. Get in. The chicken is going to be dry.

Hi. How are you? I'm good, how are you? Nice to meet you. This is going to be dry. Hi. How are you? Nice to meet you. This is my husband, Sam. Hi, I'm Matt. Hi. Thank you so much for being in Clapham on a Sunday, having a roast with us. Yeah.

I can't quite believe it. It's perfect. I love it. We did a roast because you write about it a lot. Yeah. I can't quite believe it. It's perfect. I love it. We did a roast because you write about it a lot. Yeah. Almost more than like the Spice Girls. You talk about the bloody roast. Your mum's roast chicken dinners.

Yeah, yeah. And you barbecued Yorkshires. Did I barbecue Yorkshires? You talk about barbecuing Yorkshires at one point. I don't know. Somebody did it for you. I don't think it was me. That was probably my dad.

Did it work? Barbecuing. No, you can't barbecue a Yorkshire pudding. one point I don't know somebody did it I don't think it was me that was probably my dad did it work no you can't barbecue a roast a Yorkshire pudding well no no but I was wondering whether it did work because I wondered whether we could include that in our cookbook I think it did to a certain extent but there's nothing like a proper Yorkshire pudding in the oven and you watch it rise mum has done she is I love mums because they almost are like a not for fun because sometimes they don't rise but they've risen today yeah but they probably taste shit oh they'll be all right i am going to be a really embarrassing person and i am gonna ask if my daughter can have a picture with you i've never asked anybody she's gotta have a picture with this nice girl yeah she may look nonchalant in it but i'll

be like that's funny that's funny my brother was in your mama video really yeah i don't know how that happened our moms were in that video yeah you know we didn't even tell our moms that we were shooting a video that day we just invited them down on set they thought they were having quality time with you yeah and then they were there on camera. My mother is so, such a shy person. She was so embarrassed. She wanted to kill me afterwards. She's very pretty, your mum. Yeah, she's a sweetheart.

Yeah. Those pictures are gorgeous with your dad. Yeah. He's very handsome and rather grand, debonair. Yeah.

Cute. How long is it since he passed away? A year. It's a whole year. Last March. Yeah. And it's been a while, but he's in a better place. He's out of pain, so that's

some kind of relief. He's suffered. Yeah. Badly. There was a point of no return. He was never going to get better. Yeah. It's tough, though. Oh, it is. Oh, it's horrible. Horribly tough. Is he buried up in Yorkshire? In Leeds, yeah. Leeds? Yeah, but I think some of his ashes, I think I know some of his ashes, my grandma

took back to Nevis. Oh, fantastic. Yeah. Do you go there a lot? Yeah, I've been there, well, I think every other year when I was growing up. And black grandma. Black grandma.

She's still there. She's still there. And my great grandma's alive still. She's 109, I think. Your genes. 109! Yeah. You're bloody joking.

Very strong genes on my dad's side. You can live forever. Yeah. That's amazing. And she makes all her own costumes, more like costumes, deer wear she calls it. It's got,

she has a headscarf with a matching neck scarf and a matching full outfit. She makes it all herself. Gorgeous. Yeah. So your great, what's your great grandma called?

I don't actually know her name. What do you call her then? Black great grandma. Oh, you just got. So, hon, is black. Black grandma is my dad's mum. Okay, but then there's black great grandma. Yeah.

You don't know her name? No. I love that. I should know her name. I should, but I don't. So none of you should have called after any of your family? Well, my black grandma, her middle name, which I know, is Iris. So Angel's called Angel Iris Murphy Brown, my 11-year-old.

Angel Iris. How are the girls? Good. Really good. Where are they? Phoenix, who's 19, she's back in LA. She just had Thanksgiving dinner with my friends over there. And then Angel is with her dad for thanksgiving and

madison's with her dad they're all kind of spread out because when i'm not there they all go to their different dads yeah and where are you living in la uh west hollywood well i have a house in beverly hills and a house up cold water but i mainly live in in west hollywood because it's easier for my kids to go to school because they both go to two different schools I love West Hollywood it's nice opposite the Grove oh yeah that's the Grove it's like being in England though a bit it is but I don't mind that a nice market yeah well it's nice at Christmas because the Grove supply yeah fake snow oh what I know I've been there and Michael B. Blake is always playing yeah were you there at Christmas. And Michael Buble is always playing. Yeah. Were you there at Christmas? Yeah, we were there. Because you were doing the childcare, do you remember?

Because I was writing out there. Because that's what you do. Oh, yeah. That is what you do. You did, what's it, Dancing with the Stars? Yeah. After three months of having a baby. Yeah, yeah.

Jessie, do you think your body will get me? Do you think your body will be like hers after three months? My body will never be like hers. My body will be like that after three months. I kept on my weight. I kind of liked it for a bit. I'm sorry. I've seen the videos. You did not. You looked svelte. No. If that's you keeping on the weight. No. There was a

period because I actually had to go to work the day after I gave birth. Why? I had to catch a flight to Australia because I was saving Simon's show X Factor over there and my baby, my last baby,

she came three weeks late. How inconsiderate. Oh my gosh and my start date is my start date of when they go live. So I had to get on a flight the following day

and then I had to land and go straight to work and breastfeed in between commercials. Are you doing any Simon shows at the moment? Well just finished america's got talent and american champions yeah which is actually champion show is actually a fun show i don't know so they get all the winners from all over the world have got talent so we had susan boyle on and how is she she's that well i mean she's fragile and she's very sweet though And I actually press my golden buzzer for her.

Because I'm like, she's so, she's amazing. When you see her singing in real life, does it do that thing that... Give you goosebumps. Yeah, does it? Yeah, it does. It really does. Because she's got quite an eerie, operatic kind of, you know, she's got one of those voices that's just very

grand and you don't even expect that to come out of her I mean it is an acquired taste and sound but yeah I appreciate that. Well I haven't watched X Factor I'm sick of going in as the interview to be a fucking judge and I literally go in there

you'd be great I'm not even going next next time they call me, I'll be like, go fuck yourself. Yeah, but you were so sweet and yet you came across a bit nasty on. I can't help my opinion though.

That's the thing. Don't ask me to tell the truth because I'll just say it as it is. Some of them really shite and you think, bloody hell, how did they even get here? Yeah, or who told them

that that was okay to sing like that? I know, but you feel like so sorry because you just think to yourself they've come on singing and they can't sing but the thing is it's a good thing that they come on for some of them because at least they get told the truth for once you know what I mean I don't think it's in front of millions of people that's their fault for coming on it is true it must have been I mean I finished your book and the chapter on your dad saying goodbye like it was I was sobbing in bed

yesterday no honestly it really it was it was beautifully put and it seemed so upsetting and I mean the last 10 years, you know, you... The whole book's a bit kind of a rollercoaster ride. It's hard to read. It's very honest. I text Charlie, so we've got the same book agent, and I text him, I said, this is really difficult. I'm not, like, it's not an easy read.

No, it's not. Like, you start the book... But it's one of those reads where you want to keep on reading to see what other things happen in my life. Yeah, but you know, you start... Thank you for reading it. Well, no, of but you know you start no of course but you start with the overdose which i didn't realize it was an overdose so when you appeared on the x factor oh i knew something was up but yeah so mel i don't want to put words in your mouth but

so mel had an overdose and then decided that you wanted out of the the bathroom and you and the the bruises let me out finally oh oh he pushed and tugged and there's a bunch of other physical and domestic stuff it was horrendous oh shit i sorry i kind of i i didn't realize i thought it was kind of you're like fuck what have i done and i'm gonna try and get out but you were so under the influence but then he wouldn... He wouldn't let me out. And then the ambulance came and then left. Well, because your hairdresser came round. Randy.

And so... He convinced him that, you know, I was just a little bit tipsy. Which I wasn't. I was clearly... How many pills did you have? 200. But I realised that that was such a wrong route to go down. But it was almost too late.

And I'm actually lucky to be alive because he kept me overnight. I should have got my stomach pumped within the next couple of hours, but I didn't do it until the next day. And when we say he, Stephen we're talking about. Yeah. We don't have to use his name if you don't want, just because it makes you... Does it make you feel funny?

Yeah, I can imagine. But he... Because, yeah, you took the overdose in the evening, but you didn't get to the hospital until the next day. Yeah, and I actually got my hair and makeup done as if I was going to work. I don't even know how I sat on the chair. And then I got in the car and I passed out, I think. Yeah, I did pass out. And then the driver took me straight to the hospital.

And I got my stomach pumped and I had a, I think. Yeah, I did pass out. And then the driver took me straight to the hospital and I got my stomach pumped and I had a few blood transfusions. And I hated the fact that I was missing work amongst all of that. Yeah, and then you went back to work. And the girl got voted off. No, but the next day you went back to work. But for me, it was more of a,

I had to stand up for myself because I took off my wedding ring and there's a picture of me going like that. I just say, fuck you. Yeah. Yeah. But you also chose to not wear a sleeve. You chose a sleeveless dress.

You wanted to show those. I can remember the dress. The marks. It was pale pink. Yeah. And was it feathers or tulle? It was like. Like a tulle.

A rather thing, yeah. It was a bit like the one, you know, Sex and the City when she goes on the bed and it was like um like a tulle it was a it was a bit like the one you know sex in the city when she goes on the bed and it was gray but yeah yours is a smaller version but i remember it was that beautiful very very feminine yeah very feminine and you looked beautiful as well but your face looks so but you weren't supposed to leave the hospital. They were like, what are you doing? Yeah. You were in intensive care. Yeah. So I dragged myself out of the hospital, went there and then went straight back to the hospital.

Do you... I just remember pulling all my wires out going, I have to go. Was Simon super kind? Yeah, always. And he knew what happened the day it happened because I called him. And he's always been very supportive of me but not intrusively supportive, more like a father figure like Melanie.

Is he a good person then? I'm always there for you. He's a good person then. Very good person. Oh, babies. You've got to take the dummy out if you're having a picture with Scary Spice. I'm sorry.

Did you just wake up? You want some cake? She made some cake yesterday. You want some cake? Hi. You want to watch Winnie the Pooh? Winnie the Pooh! Sorry, my daughter has just popped in demanding cake for lunch and of course because we're busy she has got it and now she's watching Winnie the Pooh so sorry about that. I'm just forming things in there.

Oh you have cats! Oh yeah, a cat called Prince. I just recently got a cat, I'm not warming things up oh you have cats oh yeah a cat called Prince I just recently got a cat I'm not a cat person but now I am now yeah which bit of a chicken

do you like? the breast oh just whichever she's done a little prayer for us oh bless you really do you that's so sweet

you're the only person that's ever done that really that was a very subtle prayer though you just do it well because you know it's like I don't want it to

appear religious and everybody has to hold hands and go do you do that before dinner every time always yeah with my kids

always and the kids prayers get so bloody long they thank the milkman the doorman the thisman and thatman yeah no I always do it

and your chicken's great. It's not dry at all. It's perfect. No, thanks to you, bloody Melanie Brown, I tell you. And this is sage and onion stuffing? No, I made it. From scratch? No.

Yeah. Talk us through it. Right, so it's breadcrumbs and onion and rosemary and thyme. And it's got apricots and pecans in. I like making stuffing. It's really good. Yeah, really good flavour. So you put it all in?

Yeah, in a food mixer. Actually, we put it in the chicken because we thought it'd make the chicken taste, give the flavour. Right. But do you do, I know you're not there at the moment, but like Thanksgiving if you're a roast person, I'm like, I wish I was American so I could celebrate Thanksgiving. Thanksgiving is a

massive celebration over there. I know. Massive massive massive. Bigger than Christmas. It really is. The turkey and the pumpkin pie and all that glazed yams. But you missed out on it this year? I did. I opted to miss out.

But you know what? To be honest, I think my kids are happier because they get to spend it with their dads. And otherwise they'll be with me and I'll be forcing them to eat everything or taste absolutely everything. And at their dad's it's like a free range. There's no rules, there's no nothing.

Are those rules around the dinner table instilled in you by your dad? Yeah. Your dad was quite strict, wasn't he? Yeah, and you weren't allowed to leave the dinner table until you'd eaten everything. Right. Yeah. And was it good food that you were eating?

Were they good food? Not really. Okay. My dad used to convince us that it was gravy, and actually it wasn't. It was oxtail soup out of a can that he put the gravy on the sunday dinner i mean the the thought was good and his sunday dinners were in theory good but the gravy wasn't you know not so much but so for you the roast is a nostalgia thing yeah but also so it wasn't really particularly that you were having the best roast you've ever lived with well the stuffing and the chicken was

good it was just the gravy that wasn't how did they do the stuffing was it like was it a paxo paxo love paxo yeah but this stuff is really good it is taste very tasty mum it's because your stuffing is always great yeah but it's a fresh mum does um do you grow your fresh herbs no why do you have a little organic garden out there i don't know sure london it fucking tastes like... It's down with rain and it's horrible. Yeah, but you can still get like a little cage thing for it. Yeah, I could. You should.

Do you have a herb garden? No, I should do. No, because I have a goat. I have a fainting goat and she'd eat everything. Why is it called a fainting goat? Does it faint a lot? Mm-hmm. It's bred like that.

So if it gets really excited or when you feed her... And I did this purely for that for that response because i look out into my garden and i laugh because if i go billy she goes like this and then just kills over and they're bred like that poor fucking goat got scary spices it's owner fuck yeah how many times is it painted at least four or five times a day but it's the funniest thing you'll ever see. Well, it's got low blood sugar. No, they're bred like that. It's a certain breed of a goat.

Why? And I tie-dye her with vegan tie-dye. So she's got all the shackle colours all over her coat. Shackles. Very funny. But they're very highly intelligent. I mean, they're seen as being quite a demonic animal to have. But they are the coolest animal to have but they

are the coolest breed to have in your back garden. Do you get goat milk from it? No. This is so good. Good I'm so pleased. I'll do the roasted parsnip. Yeah roasted parsnips and roasted carrots. Oh we love we love an appreciative guest. Yeah. Does it catch you in anywhere, being a Spice Girl? Sometimes yes, sometimes no, but I never actually use that terminology. I don't think you need to, they just look at you.

You'd be surprised, no. Have you kept in touch with them, just as a matter of course course because they're your mates? Yeah. Yeah. Even Victoria, everyone seemed to think that me and her are just looking at relationships. No, I think it's a shame.

Because you dressed up as her at Halloween. Well, why not? I didn't have a costume. But it did come when she had announced... I thought that was hilarious. I think I'm really funny. I didn't think that was me. She had announced that she wasn't doing the...

Oh, everyone was debating whether she was doing it. No, because I'd said she is joining the tour and everyone was like, Bella, stop saying that. I'm like, well, if I say it enough, she probably will. It's like that laws of attraction, the affirmation that can come true. She might do a little one-off, mightn't she?

No, mightn't. I hope she will. I think she will, Jess. I think she will. Well, how does it work, right? Because you're Spice Girls, you're best friends, friends to the end, Spice work right because you're Spice Girls you're best friends friends to the end Spice Power

but you're also business and so how does it work with Victoria not doing it well because we're one

I mean she's one of five so we all have to agree on stuff and we all take a percentage on stuff I'd actually take that wouldn't be out there

would they well Robbie's not yeah but like Robbie's not making yeah he is he will he'll still be making money wouldn't be out there would they well Robbie's not yeah but like Robbie's not making like is she yeah he is

oh he'll still be making money because he wrote the songs and the music but like so will she be kind of getting so isn't it going to piss you off

that she's not doing it but she may get cut in it's sorted out in a way where we're all happy with it fine okay got it because between us five

we couldn't be us five without us five so every single one of us is really important to each other and to the brand. You can do like a hologram, like Tupac. No. I'm envisaging, and I said this to the girls

a couple of weeks ago, actually a couple of years ago I said this and it resurfaced again. I said, you know, we can get people to join us on stage and sing like a fill-in, like Katy Perry said yes. That's a good idea. And hopefully Fingers Crossed Adele says yes, just to do the odd song.

I think they should headline Glastonbury. I think that's been talked about. I think it would be brilliant. But it's so pop and so, like, cool and indie. It's funny. That would be funny to me. No, that would be fucking great, Mum. That would be great.

Shall I write to him? Yeah, I think he'd really like to hear from you. No, I think Mel C would really appreciate something like that for us to do. She's like the cool indie chick. She is, isn't she? Like, she just kind of... I mean, is it going to be weird going back and singing those songs? No.

Is it going to feel so lovely? For part of our promo, we just got in the booth in the um photo shoot studio that we were doing for um the the launch and we just recorded the um harmony of the start of spice up your life and that was on the promotion you know when we're in the four corners of the screen yeah we're talking about getting back together we recorded that live and it was just two seconds we all just slotted into our parts. Really easy and simple. Everyone's wondering if Richard E. Grant will be driving the bus.

Because he was in the movie. In the movie, yeah. Well, I want to know, though, because I think that lots of people can be cynics about the idea that Spice Girls aren't good friends and blah, blah, blah. And I really felt like I think people are always saying that just because we're girls

and we're together they think oh no they're all bitching with each other and they don't really get on at the end of the day nobody put us together apart from ourselves yeah there was an audition

for a girl group called Touch but we never got signed on board with that management and there was only three of us in that so we were very much a homegrown girl gang that's we we were on the dole together we lived in maidenhair that we genuinely like each other fanny rejuvenation well i didn't really need a rejuvenation so i didn't get that done but the procedure is very similar to what a woman would get done. What is, is it just adding, making it a bit tighter down there?

Well, what I did was, it's a bit like, and I say this very candidly, but it's actually really important, a bit like a rape victim. When you've been raped, you want to scrub any remnants off your body, inside, outside of that person. So you can just erase it. So I went to Dr. Matlock and I said,

I don't want to feel like the last person that was inside my vagina was this monster. So he examined me. He said, well, you don't even look like you've had babies. He goes, legally, there's nothing that I can do about that because you don't need to have anything done. And I said, well, so he didn't charge me, by the way. I said, well, can you just go in there and get everything out but then pack it with new, like, fresh tissue

but you can keep it the same shape and size. So what, you, like, kind of scrape off the tissue? And then they put a new... And that's the thing. Yeah, a new layer in. But most women, they get that done because they want to be made smaller. Right. Or I didn't need to be made smaller.

I didn't need to be made bigger. I just wanted it to just be clean and new inside there. Okay. But it's kind of nice to know that I've got a perfect vagina to start with. I'm really... I'm glad that everyone's going to know that too. I had no doubts, to be honest, Melanie. You know.

It's very pretty, apparently. I like the fact he didn't charge you because it was so nice. Because your fanny was so pretty. He just said, you can't do anything. It's perfect. But that actually made me feel just better on the inside. It's like when my ex-husband made me get this tattoo. It says, Stefan, till death do us part

I own your heart oh is it Stefan yeah oh I thought I've been calling him Stephen you can call him whatever you want so I got instead of getting his name

lasered off I got it cut off I had a consultation because the doctor was saying I don't really want to do that to you and I said well you have to think about

it's more psychological if he's cut off my body he's cut from my life kind of thing and I have it in a little jar in my kitchen yeah nobody knows what it is apart from me and what are you gonna do with it i don't know my girlfriends give them saying when's the burning of the skin party and when's the divorce party i'm like no it can just stay up there there was something quite telling in the book that you can't you talk about this he kind of kind of it's this

predator-like behavior where you were in this hotel and you had the newborn baby that was eddie murphy's kid is eddie murphy a child and i mean i found the eddie murphy chapter and and you talking about eddie eddie he seems like the love of your life yeah and it's hot yeah i think so and And I know you have a relationship now, and that's brilliant for Angel. But Angel was a newborn, and Stephen comes in and kind of decides, says, you should go downstairs.

You should get out of the hotel room. And you're probably in a bit of that fog of a new mother where you're on autopilot, you know, knackered. And there's this picture that comes out with him holding Eddie Murphy's baby. And it just felt so... Wrong and disgusting. Manipulating.

Yeah, he went for visitation nights, didn't he, with that? But he didn't get them. Well, because Eddie just shut that down. The judge said, no, if the mother and the father, her mother and father are saying no but there is a law that allows you to be able to take the parents to court

called the stepfather's law is there? there isn't one in England he wouldn't have a leg to stand on surely though no it got shut down because the judge said no based on the fact that I said no and Eddie said no but I never wanted to involve Eddie in all of that stuff because that's not his fault. Except Angel did know him quite well. Yeah. Was he nice to her? Very nice yeah but it was also very strained because whenever I would take Angel

over to go and see him that was considered me cheating on my husband I'm like I just dropped her off so that got minimised, the amount of times that I would take her over there. But now I've left, I mean, she's spending a whole week with her dad. She goes on holiday with him. He must have known how in love you were with Eddie. Yeah, but I've never hid that though.

And even now, you know, I'm very respectful. He's got a new relationship. Yes, very good. He's got a new relationship. He's on his second baby with her. And she's a lovely lady. Is this Eddie? Yeah. It just feels quite frustrating, the story.

Because it is like two ships passing. It's like sliding doors. And you're just like, why didn't you just answer the fucking phone, Melanie? I know. And then he wouldn't have gone on the Dreamgirls bloody carpet and said said it's just so frustrating and it seems frustrating that you couldn't repair that when it felt like such just a mistake it was it was a huge mistake him saying that on on the on the red carpet and saying i don't know if this child's mine yeah i mean i can't even imagine he apologizes about that yeah but it doesn't still it was done

out there but like was there any chance of you reconciling? Not then, no. We literally just passed each other. The timing was just all over the place. And it's only now that we can actually talk about it and almost, not laugh about it, but it was kind of, it's taken nearly 10 years to figure it out. And even Louise, when she was helping me write the book,

she was like, something's missing in this part of the story. What, tell me. And I was like, well, I don't know what it out. And even Louise, when she was helping me write the book, she was like, something's missing in this part of the story. What, tell me. And I was like, well, I don't know what it is. So then she spoke to my mum and then she spoke to my best friend and she pieced it all together. And she was like,

this is an unfinished story, Melanie. I'm like, I know. It's a really frustrating love story. But not every love story always ends up like happily ever after. That's life. You haven't had many happily ever after well you you haven't had many happily ever afters to be honest i think you're still waiting for anyone else

have you met someone i've met a few people now maybe she doesn't she's she does look she's look at her i know when i know that is funny but I don't want a relationship my friend even not boyfriend but my friend who happens to be a guy went and hugged me the other day and I went what are you doing? because my PTSD and flashbacks

I feel like someone's coming to launch me you will meet someone but I don't need to and I don't want to my thing is I need to because I'm a very damaged person you need to heal um you are a patron for women's aid yeah they just asked me about a week ago i'm so quite shocked because it's everything that i've been through and they're helping women in my situation that i've either been through it or going through it or that need help to get out of it so it's me and julie walters that are patrons and i i created a t-shirt called Unbreakable

that's on sale and all the money and the proceeds go to helping women in my situation, whether it be via a refuge or education

or therapy or help with their kids. Yes, it's a really good thing. because refuges are closing down. I know. It wouldn't just close down. That was 45, been going for 45 years.

They absolutely have to have money. money really it's so important because where else are these women going to go to there's nowhere i know to be safe and the government needs to actually be more aware of that and start funneling the money their way yeah also they do yeah right should we have some pudding? Yes. Now, what happened is I had a surreal thing where official Mel B started following me on Instagram. And then I direct messaged you.

And you did. And you got back to me straight away. You slid into my DMs. And of course I did. I wasn't going to leave you waiting, to keep you keen. So I... Yes, I do.

How can you not want Victoria's Bunch cake? No, I want everything cake i'm supposed to be being gluten and sugar free but this is not going very well you want some of that as well is it this is bread and butter pudding i want to sit to victoria sponge so this is why we have two puddings this um today because basically i said mel we're gonna do a roast because i've been reading the book i know you like them now what would you like for pudding now we don't let people choose usually but you're scary so like you i didn't know you like them. Now, what would you like for pudding? Now, we don't let people choose usually, but you're Scary Spice.

Oh, thank you. I didn't know that. I didn't want to get this wrong. And you said, I'm not really a puddings person. I said, okay, well, should I get some cheese? And you went, no. Why don't we have Victoria's Sponge? And then I was like, fuck, shit.

So then, bless our agent, Charlie, his mother made the Victoria's Sponge cake. It's a beautiful, a very, very... It's very glamorous looking too. It's very glamorous. Charlie's mum, Joanna, made made the Victoria sponge cake. His mother has made a beautiful, a very, very. It's very glamorous looking too. It's very glamorous. Charlie's mom, Joanna, made this Victoria sponge cake. So thank you, Joanna Brotherstone. It looks very delicious.

So we've actually got panettone. We've got panettone bread and butter pudding. And you made this, right? Which mom made. And then we've also got Victoria sponge. So Victoria sponge, you're not a pudding person, you say. No. But Victoria sponge cake, if I'm going to a pudding person you say no but Victoria's sponge cake

if I'm going to do pudding that is my go to and my favourite because it's just sponge fresh cream and jam even though she's

gone a bit fancy with strawberries and stuff it's just plain and simple it just gets to the point yeah so what do you bake

no I don't bake neither do I but I do cook cook like cook meals and stuff what's your meal that If you've got somebody coming round

Yeah You know it's going to be a winner Sunday roast That is it Okay so It actually is Chicken Roast potatoes

Roasted carrots Sprouts Stuffing Gravy Boom Fine Condiments you're not bothered about No

Is that because they're sweet?'t grow up with that kind of stuff okay fine I grew up very council estate leads so we didn't bother with any of that we didn't even have puddings growing up necessarily right okay

so puddings to me it's not part of my everyday I wasn't growing up but now it kind of is a little bit more do the girls like puddings well they like sweets candy as they call it

candy yeah but I limit that to just on a Friday. So, okay, the roast is your thing. Mm-hmm. We ask everybody,

what's your last supper? Desert Island supper. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Starter main pud. Starter would have to be a prawn cocktail. So many people have that. Really?

Yeah. Really? That's funny. Or spaghetti vongole. What's vongole? That sounds very posh. With clams and spaghetti. Oh, no, I don't like clams. No? That's funny. Or spaghetti vongole. What's vongole? That sounds very posh. With clams and spaghetti. Oh, no, I don't like clams.

No, no, no. No. You see, I want to say roast for my main dish because that is my go-to. Me too. Everything. Fine. I'm not really into red meat or steak, burgers, that kind of stuff. So it would have to be a roast dinner, Sunday roast.

And then Victoria sponge. And then Victoria sponge. And what would you be drinking? burgers that kind of stuff so it would have to be a roast dinner sunday roast and then victoria sponge and what would you be drinking chateauneuf de pap red while do you want to hear a funny thing in your book you say you know you can tell the difference between a good bottle of red and a shit bottle of red mum said don't worry i'm getting my good bottle out and i said what's that and she went i said mum is it primitivo I went, how much was that? And she went, 10 quid. That's a good bottle. That's not bad. It's not bad. It's not great, but it's not bad.

Do you know Dermatolure? Of course you do. Yes, I just said hi to him yesterday. So he bought a bottle of wine that was 110 pounds. Oh, wow. We nearly fainted. Was it nice? Yeah.

Well, actually, I don't think we'd opened it long enough. But he knew more about food than we did. Because he'd run a restaurant. Oh, really? Yeah. Well, actually, I don't think we'd opened it long enough. But he knew more about food than we did. Because he'd run a restaurant. Oh, really? Yeah. I had a restaurant in LA called Serafina. I bought it from New York. Serafina? I've heard of it. Yeah, Italian restaurant.

Is it still there? Is that the one that you got for Stefan? Yeah. So that he wouldn't have to travel with me so much. So you'd keep him away, so he'd be busy. Mm-hmm. Is it still going? No, it shut down about six months ago but it was really popular did it shut down because of the divorce and stuff yeah why don't you open another i don't think i want to it's a lot of work and a lot of energy and i'm

going on tour next year and i've got yeah i feel like we need to talk about how's it gonna work so we've talked about like posh isn't going to be there but hopefully at some point she will she will darling so potentially she could be i mean i hope so i'm hopeful i mean i can't say on the record definitely yes because she hasn't said i want to know there was that picture at jerry's house that came out and everyone was a bit like oh my god something's bubbling something's bubbling oh we got five of all of you and it was like you'd all flown in and you can't you allude to it in the book, don't you? And then that was talking about getting back together, right?

Yeah. Well, that was talking about, I wouldn't say necessarily performing together. We were just going to reform and pick up our brand again. Right. Because Victoria's always said from the very beginning that she didn't really have the taste for performing again, even though the rest of us did. You must have been disappointed when Victoria said she was out. Well, we kind of always knew

that she wasn't really into performing again. But, I mean, I still hope that she will. And I think it'd be good for her to get with her four girls again. Was there any friction between you lot at the height of your success? I mean, look, I get it,

girls, sisters fight. No, it was more like a sisterly fight that would happen every other day almost. I mean,

even the other day when we did a bunch of radio together, me and the other girls, Geri said something to me and I push her and she pushes me. It was like,

girl mates, it's like being part of a little gang. Didn't Geri say something about bloody Theresa then I push her and she pushes me. It was like girl mates. It's like being part of a little gang. Didn't Geri say something about bloody Theresa May saying everyone should give her a chance or something like that? Oh, she would have done. She's barmy as Geri half the time. But you've got to love her for it. How long are you doing the tour for?

I mean, it sold out in like a second. It did sell out. Jessie, can you just ask them to get tickets? Yeah, of course you can. No, because we have a reserve for each of us for on whichever date you want to come

yeah I don't have to yeah will you have my number LA you live in LA you've been able to eat everywhere in the world

yeah where are some of your favourite restaurants in the world oh god even if they're just neighbourhood spots that aren't even

fancy schmancy thing is I haven't been out that much recently, so I don't know what the hotspots are. But I mean, I took my kids for dinner to the Ivy last Sunday after church, which was great. Leeds.

Where did you go in Leeds? Well, I go to my mum's. Your mum's? I don't really eat out, but I did have fish and chips at Harry Ramsden's. It was a chip shop in Bradford. But it was really good. Fish and chips and scraps and a bread cake. It was a chip shop in Bradford. But it was really good. Fish and chips and scraps and a bread cake. Scraps?

What is scraps? It's the batter bits off the fish. Oh, yeah. That is fabulous. And you wouldn't have, with the sauce, would you have a tartare? No. They have curry sauce up there. I have curry sauce and mush peas.

Curry sauce? Are you mad? All right, forgive me. She's your... I'm southern. I'm southern. Christ, I've brought up a southerner. I'm from Manchester. I love the condiments. Yeah, but you lost your fucking accent. Yeah, I'm southern. I'm southern. Christ, I've brought up a southerner. I'm from Manchester.

Yeah, but you lost your fucking accent. Yeah, I bloody did. Curry sauce, though, is the best. Curry sauce is the best. It's the best with chips. And it's so salty. It's so good. It's so great.

It's very good. So, okay. Do you have a ta-ta? That's hilarious. Ta-ta? Who is she? That's what happens when you send them to private school. They have Tata

with their fish and chips. So do you have Tata with your fish and chips? No, I don't really, but I'm not a fucking multi-millionaire fucking Spice Girl, so I thought maybe

you would have enjoyed the fine of this and liked a Tata. I don't know which chip shops. Actually, Kirbyshire and Malt Food. Yeah, I mean, okay, fine.

What's the most, this may be too hard, what's the most this may be really too hard what's the most memorable meal with the spice girls can you remember one meal that just kind of either the people that you were with or like there's so many i remember when we landed in japan and i was one of us our first single had just gone number one in the uk and we had sushi that night in the hotel that was saying i. I think we stayed at the Shangri-La or something like that in Osaka, Tokyo. And I remember we just all stuffed our faces

with a bunch of sushi, mainly California rolls, and had lots of wine and champagne, which I don't even really like champagne. Really? Yeah. But you kind of have to do it if you're number one. Yeah, and we all wore dresses, like we were all going out on dates

when we were just having dinner with each other. Who's got the worst table manners in Spice Girls? Not me, because I actually went to etiquette school, I have you know. Did you? I could tell. I could tell. I won Miss Lees Weekly News, and part of winning Miss Lees Weekly News was you got to wear a sash,

I won a Renault Clio car, and I went to etiquette classes. So you learn how to get in and out of a car and you learn to go from the outside in. You do your knees first, don't you? You get your feet and swing it round. Never put one leg out first. I would not be allowed to walk up and down London. I'm not winning

that then. So who's got the worst table manners? Who's got the best? Emma. Emma's got the worst. Emma's got the worst because she's such a foodie. She just goes all in. Doesn't matter what might go wrong. What's on your rider?

What's going to be on your rider or what was on it before? When you were at your height, what was the most extravagant thing you had on your rider? I have like cheese and onion crisps and watsits and midget gems and Stella beer. Shut up, you're crying. Stella beer. What's on it now?

What's on it now? I haven't done a ride yet. Oh, peppermint tea. Jessie, you're like Jessie. She's got peppermint tea. She's got crudité and sodding hummus. Well, it's just so I don't eat too much. Everybody wants big, lovely things and she's got crappy, yeah.

You know, face wipes, deodorant, just regular stuff. No puppies? No puppies or I don't want everything white. But I do have soy candles. Soy candles. Soy candles? Yeah. Reiki?

Yeah. You started when you were 19. That's pretty, like, I mean, I like to think I'm a bit of a hippy dippy. But like, that's... How did you learn about Reiki? When you were 19 and you were in Leeds and you were like, who did you learn by? Well, I was with the Spice Girls by the time I was 19.

When did you join them? We formed ourselves when I was about 17 and a half. Shit. And then we lived in a council flat in Maidenhead, our house. When was that? Which year? Well, the single came out in... 96. So a year and a bit before that.

Mum, just make her do it. She won't tell you what I want. I was on the train yesterday coming up from Leeds and this woman said to me, I want to... I recognise you. And so then my friend started giving her clues and she went, well, does she look a bit scary? And the woman was going, no, she doesn't look scary. And she goes, well, does baby and scary ring a bell?

And she goes, she's not a scary baby. And then my friend goes, should I tell you what I want? And she goes, what do you want? In the end, I went, I'm a Spice Girl and I'm Scary Spice. I'm the black one

in the group, okay? She's like, oh, that's where I know you from. I think every, every load of girls of, so how old were you,

Jessie? Year six. I remember it was like our Lever's Disco. Right. And everyone, there was always five girls

that got together. And also, Spice Up Your Life, we, I was in year and also Spice Up Your Life I was in year seven Spice Up Your Life and at a birthday party we all did it it was like we all knew the

colours of the world we had to dance it was amazing I always felt like you got the best bits of the song no because I'm so aggressive all I would do

is just yell over every song it worked I know and also Want You Back is one of the best R&B tunes ever, ever to happen, by the way. I mean, it was so good. I was pregnant when I shot that video, too.

Three months pregnant. It was Hype Williams, wasn't it? Yeah. Funny, my daughter said to me the other day, she went, because she started coming round to my house a lot more. I'm like, why are you hanging out with me so much these last couple of weeks? Your daughter? Yeah. Because she's always kind of hung out with me but she was making a point of does she have her own flat yeah coming in on a morning on an afternoon i'm like i'm seeing you

way too much what's going on what do you want she's like no mum you know what i figured out you're that old you know you've kind of reccled back your vintage, which is really fucking cool. That is so good. That's amazing. What a bitch. Circles your vintage. Mel B, Melanie Brown, Scary Spice, thank you so much for coming over. Thank you.

Oh, I've loved it. We could have you forever. Thank you for being such a friend. It's been fabulous. Good luck with the book. Thank you. And good luck with the Spice Girls tour. And if you need a Poshh spice study, I'm there.

She said. Ta-ta. Yeah, yeah. That's qualified for Jess. Well. Well what, darling? How was that for you i thought she actually i'm fed up with saying this because everyone says lenny always says that someone's gorgeous but actually i thought her skin was beautiful yeah she did look kind of quite radiant for someone who's been through the mill. Didn't you think? Yeah, hopefully she's coming out the other side now. She had the most fabulous...

The boots. Boots on that you can't have seen. You couldn't even paint those, could you? Never mind buy them. It was fascinating. I wished I'd asked a few more Spice Girls gossip stories. I want to know. I now want to have dinner with Emma just to see if she can give me a run for my money.

Why don't we have her? Maybe we should go backstage with them backstage on the Spice Girls tour. Jessie, do you think it was rude to ask for tickets? No, I'm really glad that you did because I know that they're really hard tickets to get. I know they are. They're going for thousands and thousands. I thought, sod it, she's in my house eating her lunch do you think it's rude that I asked to be posh spice no okay cool but I don't think you should have the bob I don't think

I'm gonna get the gig mum okay thank you so much to Melanie Brown for coming over on a Sunday and eating our dinner she enjoyed it she enjoyed the dinner so warm she's brave isn't she yeah Melanie brave that's what the B should stand for because she's brave thank you for listening to Table Manners if you are affected by domestic violence and you would like more information please visit Women's Aid who Mel B is now a patron for. We can put the website in our notes on podcasts. Please donate to Women's Aid. So many refuges are closing down because they don't have enough funding.

And they're absolutely crucial for women who are suffering domestic violence. They're the only refuge, the only place to go for some women. Yeah, we will put the information in our notes the music you've listened to on table manners is by peter duffy and pete fraser and table manners is edited by the wonderful alice williams