Tabs Out Cassette Podcast - Bonus Episode: Very safe and NOT SCARY Stuff | 10.6.19

Episode Date: November 6, 2019

Very safe and NOT SCARY Stuff

Are you playing the theme song first? Yeah, you are. Is it recording us right now? Yeah. Okay. I always like to know these things. Too spooky indeed. Tabs out. Cassette podcast bonus episode.

I'm Mike here with, of course, the bonus brigade. Hello. It's Ian. Hi, it's Jamie. Introduce yourself properly, boys. Come on, try it again. Hi. Hey, it's Ian. Hi, I's Jamie. Introduce yourself properly, boys. Come on, try it again. Hi. Hey, it's Ian.

Hi. I'm Jamie. Very nice. Strong voice. Jamie, correct me if I'm wrong, but do it gently. You made that theme song, right? I did. That's your work.

And it talks about being spooky, but I got to say, you're way off for this one. You're way off. We'll see. We'll see. I don't know. No, no spookiness will be happening. October is indeed over. Halloween has left the building.

We do no more spooky stuff. Yeah. We leave the ghouls and critters behind. If you think it is still October, Jamie, you're a fool. You're a fool. So we're not doing spooky stuff. It's November now.

We're going to do stuff that, maybe stuff that's very safe and not scary stuff. Yeah, I think that would be appropriate. That was actually, you know what I did? I did on the Twitter. I'm firing off these tweets. I did one saying that we were recording this bonus episode, and I asked for a theme,

and I got a bunch of garbage. It's Like awful. It's always awful. People are saying, what's wrong? Somebody said sand. What do you mean sand? It's tough. Somebody said worms.

All right, that's pretty good. But like, as usual, a bunch of garbage. Except Radio Shock said very safe and not scary stuff. Stuff that is not scary. Too spoo. Nope. Not scared at all. It's not spooky. So here's what I'm expecting you boys to do.

Yeah. I'm expecting you to give me a tape and not scare me. Can you do that, Ian? And not scare the listeners. That's a tall order. I think we can do it. I'm not scared at all. You go first.

I'm going first? You go first, man. Yeah, because you're always the worst, so let's do it that way. So we'll start it off bad. Nice, this case, though. Describe this case that you have. Oh, I picked this up at a garage sale. It's like a hard shell cassette carrying case.

It almost looks like a dollhouse or something that Barbies would go in. I think it kind of looks like the thing that Ghostbusters have that they throw out there. It opens up from the top. This doesn't open from the top. It opens from the side. It opens from the side and it's missing a thing.

Yeah, it's missing a lock. If anyone can 3D print Ian a new hinge lock. Let me know. Did we say what color it was? It's pink. It's more than pink, though. That's like a coral. Coral?

I think it's just faded. It's like when raspberry sherbet melts. It's like that color. It's beautiful. You got a gem. You should be proud of yourself. Thanks. What'd you pay for that puppy?

A couple bucks. Ian. You are a wolf of Wall Street. All right, what do you got? Give me something that's not going to scare me. Oh, my God, you better not scare me. I'm going to kick it off with this forest management split. Forest management.

Let's think about this. I'm going to play the forest management side. It's on baked tapes. Okay. It's a split. Is that a Christmas present? Maybe. I'm not too spooked yet. No, I mean, this is like a lot of red and

green. It's a nice little Christmas gift. So far, I'm thinking, ho, ho, ho. I think it's A-side. This is the season. I'm not scared at all. Oh, he's got a screw in here. Let me fill the shell, the little window in the middle. Oh, that's hard as can be. It's pretty good.

This isn't a flimsy one. It's very safe. Fake tapes using only the most quality stock. This isn't scary at all. This is very safe and very nice. Ian, turn that down. Or Jamie, turn that down just a little bit. This is a real mellow one.

I mean, most of forest management stuff is pretty mellow, droney stuff. Can you hand me the case? Yeah. But I was trying to decide is drone scary? I don't think so. Is drone scary? I don't think it is. Well... What if it goes on too long?

And you get addicted to it. Well, it's like Black Mirror. Yeah, you've convinced me. But this isn't a very long tape. This is an appropriate amount of time. Very nice. Not scary stock.

No. It's just fading out. You know what? I'm going to be honest. I had a very difficult time finding things that are not scary. Same here. And I'm not joking. I'm not joking trying to seem like I'm cool because I'm into scary shit no that's not me man I'm looking through these

things a lot of scary tapes everything's about like let me ask you a question did you rewind this tape yeah I feel like we're getting to the end here a lot of his going on mm-hmm rewind it this was scary. Actually, I'm kind of scared now. No, but I'm being serious. A lot of stuff is about people are getting hurt or mangled or there's some sort of knife involved. Lots of knives. Lots of knives and weapons and hurtfulness.

Lots of scary faces on the covers of tapes, too. Yeah. Statues. Oh, masks. Yeah. Scary, spooky masks. This didn't rewind rewind too much but let's just play it from here because i'm already i'm already scared i found a bunch that were like okay this could work maybe and then i looked into it some more and they're the track titles were all about death and you know i'm gonna say depressing stuff some of mine seem like they're not scary, but I have details that will

scare you. I have details that will scare you. When did this tape come out? I don't know. Maybe... I want to say maybe last year. What's that? 2018?

Yeah. Maybe 2017. Baked Tapes just released a new Crazy Doberman tape on Halloween. I shouldn't have mentioned Halloween. I don't know why he brought it up. This is really, really scary and difficult. This is nice. But is Trone scary?

Should we vote if Trone is scary? I mean, you say it's not scary. I think I'm still undecided now. We already swayed him. You know, I say we storm the skiff and we demand all the drone documents be released to the public, and I'm not joking. Who was forest management again?

I don't know. I don't know his real name. I think he's a Chicago guy He's a ghost? I think he's a person He's a ghost? This is tight You did a good job Ian Yeah I'm not scared by this

I'm not scared and I really thought you were going to scare me And I'm looking at the one on the top of your pile And it is scaring me Don't look too much yet. Jamie, you want to go into a tape? Yeah. I got something. I got something more upbeat than this. What's going on

with the cover of this Farge Management tape? What is that face? What's going on there? That might be scary. Actually, hold on, Your Honor. Your Honor, I object. That may be scary. Is this scary, Jamie? Is that a lobster? What is that?

No, it's not a lobster. I don't know what's going on. It's a head, and the head has some sort of tail going into it, and it's splitting up to another head, like another silhouette. Oh, I see. That's completely normal. Is that normal? That happens to boys? Yeah, that happens all the time. to boys okay all right all right totally not scary how dare you okay then this

isn't scary you're right you're i'm trying to find fault in you i'm trying to do it i don't want to be the one that brings the most scariness okay i got i got something upbeat you got something upbeat i got something that is sure not to scare you. Is it safe? It's safe. Is it not scary in all caps, as Radio Shock put it? I think we're good. So this is Tradici Baci, a tape on astral spirits.

It's actually astral spirits number three. I'm not scared. It's an early one. It's like a 13-piece orchestra doing sort of Morricone stuff done by... What's his name? Simon Haynes? Yeah. Guy who founded Gorillatos and Trigger.

Trigger played Delaware a couple years ago. He's a ghost? No, that was a scary show. That was scary. But he's a ghost? But I know this one. This is a good one. Yeah.

You know this tape specifically? Yeah. Yeah. Like his copy? You know his copy? You this one i got i got number 79 of 200. big run big funny number the third one they were doing 200. that's pretty uh wait let me say it real quick what do you want i'll give you give me the whole package the whole deal what year did you say this came out i didn't say what year it came out. I thought you did. But it is number three.

I'm going to guess 2015. What's that interference I'm getting, Jimmy? Bing, bing, bing. Yeah. What is that? That just started. What is that? That's my mic.

Whoa, bad cable. Oh, sorry. Wow. All right. Now, what was I saying? You said, I asked you what year this came out. Ian got it right on the head. First try.

I guess 2015. No, I'm looking at the shell. Oh. In a rare move, they put the year on the shell, as if they knew. As if, in their infinite wisdom, they knew that one day, Ian in you would challenge me on my own podcast and try to say a definite thing i cannot believe this you know what uh discogs is wrong

then because discogs says 2015 should i should i edit it on the spot i mean i'm gonna say the shell imprint that's binding that's a binding that's a binding contract yeah when you when you when you print something on the shell of a cassette that's a binding contract. When you print something on the shell of a cassette, that's a binding contract. And that might be scary. It's a little scary. But it is the law. I'm not scared.

This was, you said their third release? Yeah. Yeah, look at that. Classic Astral Spirits. Back when the cover art was simple. I want to do a Ken burns documentary on extra spirits real quick yeah i gotta say right now i feel safe i feel happy i feel like someone's gonna give me a baguette i don't know this is beautiful i'm not scared at all So what's going on here?

Is this a split? Yes, but you know, this is a split between Chidichi Bachi and... I gotta turn my mic up a little bit, sorry. Get back in the game. Get back, get back, get back. It's a split with Tradici Bacci and ENPSE. But that's just the same members,

just doing more free stuff. Ooh. They pulled a prank. Yeah. That's a prank move. Oh, my. Yeah. I love a good prank. A safe prank. The B side is a bit scary. Oh, wait. So we a prank move. Oh my. I love a good prank.

The B side is a bit scary. So we're sticking to the A side. Why do you say that? Turn this down just a touch. That's almost too much. But it was perfect. Why is the B side scary? Because more avant-garde

angular music is scarier than this kind of music. That's fine. That's of music. That's fine. That's fine. That's not scary. That's safe. Okay. This is very nice.

National Spirits has just been going so hard. Yeah, killing it. 2014 was the original year, right? It must have been the first few releases. What was the first release on the label? Who's going to get it first me or jamie i see him staring at a screen ice pick damn it i'm not even on a site yet i say what you gotta give more information uh chris corsano nate woolley in brick hacker flatten i wonder when the art started to get more crazy it was

just like the covers had the shape a single shape yeah like in the top middle kind of with the text below it yeah and then they just start to get kind of wacky they're starting to get complex complex man well you know jazz is Jazz is complex. This is very nice. A little organ. What kind of organ is that, Jamie? I think that sounds like a Wurlitzer. I don't know. What serial number you got on that thing?

I guess organs can be scary if they're doing like big church music in a scary church. Ooh. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's all about context, I guess. That's what jazz is, man. It's all about context. Yeah. Very nice

I'm not scared at all I'm loving this I'm absolutely loving this I'm not scared at all I'm going to play something now And this is one of mine that I'm going to play something now. All right. And this is one of mine that, I'm going to stop this tape. This is one where I thought right away,

I was like, oh shit, in a sea of these goons, these outsider goons trying to make me soil myself, make me go, huh. Which you did. Which I did like over and over. And I saw this one and I thought, oh, so not scary.

Free Kitten. Oh, yeah. Free Kitten. What could be scary about a Free Kitten? A little cutie pie kitten. Am I right? I love kittens. Are you guys familiar with Free Kitten?

I'm not. No. Kim Gordon started this band. Oh. With, who this band. Oh. With, who else was in it? I'm going to have to click on something so I don't fuck it up. Is this like major label stuff? This was, this is called Sentimental Education.

Ouija Records? W-I-I-J-A? Maybe there's three I's in there? Ay, ay, ay. They put it out in like the 90s. And then Kill Rockstars did a few reissues. And I don't know. I guess we used to have somebody, a connection to Kill Rockstars.

They used to send us shit. That doesn't happen anymore. That was nice. And I thought this was, oh, this is Kim Gordon from Sonic Youth. Julie Kaferitz from Plotigalore. Yoshimi from Boredoms. Mark Eibold from Pavement.

It's a friggin' super group. Wow, that is a super group. It's a friggin' super group. Woo! Good job, everybody. For all the previous rock and roll you did, we're giving you

a super group. Not scared. Not scared, right? So far, not scared at all right this is very pleasing very pleasing and it goes on there's some uh there's some weird avon muddiness going on somewhere there's obviously some songs it's all very good not scary at all freak it and that's not scary let me see the cover here hold on though oh ian's trying to find something scary i'm gonna tell you something let me see if you here. Hold on, though. Ian's trying to find something scary.

I'm going to tell you something. Let me see if you can find it on there. Yeah, Kill Rock Stars reissued this in an LP in 97, and then they put out this tape in 2015. I'm seeing some scary stuff in the track titles here. I'm just going to skip all that, because I'm going right to the scariest part. There's some stuff on here by, fade this out real quick. By DJ Spooky.

Whoa. The spookiest DJ you can be. I can't believe you. And all of a sudden I'm scared. Is it ghost? But how about we fade this out for a little bit. We'll let this tape play for a little while. Yeah. I think we have to take play for a little while. Yeah.

I think we have to take a spooky break, right? Too spooky. I gotta take a spooky break. Too scary. One, two, three, four. Got to feel it Never, never sleep Never, never sleep. Never, never sleep. Never, never, never, never. Sweet, sweet. Never gonna switch

Switch, switch Never gonna switch guitar solo guitar solo guitar solo guitar solo guitar solo guitar solo guitar solo guitar solo guitar solo guitar solo

guitar solo guitar solo guitar solo guitar solo Jimmy, you don't have to count down the turn in the unmuting us, man. You just unmute us. He's doing it straight up like Wayne's World, like three, two, one. Just come back in, man. He's a professional. I just want to make sure you guys aren't saying anything unsavory for the listeners.

No, I want it all on raw. Raw. Raw. This year, listen to live Mike on Tabs Out, where I'm never muted. Uncut. Unfiltered. Too raw for podcasting. He's a ghost?

Pay this down. But he's a ghost? So, Free Kitten, that is not scary, but DJ Spooky is scary. So, we were forced to take our first week get three spooky breaks before the show blows up. That's the rule. That was the first spooky break. And I'm looking at this table on top of your fucking pile, man, and I'm thinking, if you even dare...

I might just... I'm going to just... I'm out of here, man. I'm going to hit you with a curveball. You disgrace! Okay. He pulled the bottom one. I pulled the bottom one.

A bit of a jock, are you? Yeah. All right. Since you played a little... Common, give me reverb, Jamie. Are you trying to spook me? Give me reverb. Do not play anything too spooky.

Too spooky. Take the reverb away and be serious. Be serious and nice and safe. A funny feeling called fear. Don't mess this up, man. All right. This one's going a little bit back, I think even further back than the free kitten tape.

Further back than the 1997 Kitten tape. Further back than the 1997s? Yeah. This is a newer reissue, but a tape from the 70s. The 1970s? The 70s? Wait a minute, Ian. Let me get this straight. The 1970s?

When hair was long and rock really rocked? When weed was weed? Old school. The 1970s. Old school. A lot of people say the 1970s are the 1960s. A lot of people are saying that now.

The calendar people, the calendar companies. A lot of people are saying that. The new 60s. All right, what do you got, Ian? This is a tape from Harmonia. Okay, yeah, we've played Harmonia before. Yeah, I think you probably played this one when it came out. This was a reissue from 2015.

Harmonia is just a very pleasant sounding name. Yeah, German? Yeah, I think so. Am I throwing the B side on? No, A side. Okay, sorry about that. Another one here. I queued it up to a pretty chill one.

I'm going to tap this window in the middle of the tape for everybody. When you hear that and you can even tap it that many times in a row without it caving in, you know you got a good tape. You got a good tape. He's brought two tapes with strong windows on them. Hold on though. I'm going to point out something. I'm going to point out something. I don't even know if I'm allowed to say

it legally on the air. The screws on the B side. You can't win them all. That's what they do in Germany. I'm going to point out something I don't even know if I'm allowed to say legally on the air. The screws on the B side. Oh. You can't win them all. Just wanted to point that out. That's what they do in Germany. You want me to hit play? Wait, where?

This is German? Are you serious? It's very chill. So who reissued this? Is that stimulus progression? I don't know. There's a big sticker on the back that says stimulus progression. That's not it?

That has nothing to do with it? I feel like we've played this tape before, actually. I think you probably have. Did you steal this from somebody? No. Did you take this from Dave? This is nice. I'm not scared by this either no this might be the I'm trying to like I said I'm really trying to find the scariness there are some like clang clang clangs it's not really scary

though no I guess I can handle it it's if I can find anything scary at all. Hmm. Even the font's, like, very safe. Let's see. I wouldn't say there's a live shot in here of them playing. And there's not too many people there, and everybody looks like they're just kind of hanging out. I swear these people just look like they're hanging out.

It's a good set. They're not moshing or anything. I'm not scared at all. This is very safe. Hmm. Picking up. Picking up speed. Hopefully they don't go too fast.

I would say... Oh, there we go. Here we go. Now we're getting loose. But they are picking up speed. They are. Now I'm trying to get worried. I don't feel as safe as I once did. Put off.

It may be a case of, though, I felt so safe before that any semblance of scariness would just send me over the top. Your tolerance is really low. I'm blowing my load, boys. It's too rough. Yeah, I would say besides the German-ness of it, it's very safe Ian what's your favorite scary movie too scary too scary I don't know I don't really think I have a favorite scary movie.

What's your favorite scary movie? I'll tell you. I like Freddy. Forget about it. With the nails, with the sharp nails, I like Freddy. I think that's the scariest one. I like Freddy. I like all the Freddys.

I think the later the Freddy, the better the Freddy. I don't know if I've ever seen a full Nightmare on Elm Street movie. Are you serious? Why, too scared to pee your pants? Yeah. Yeah? Get out of here.

This is really, really scary. I've seen Ernest Scared Stupid. Now that's a classic. Now that one's really scary. That monster thing? Yeah. That scared me when I was younger. I'm more of an Ernest goes to jail

fellow myself. Which is also, when you think about it, pretty scary. My favorite one is the camp. Ernest goes to camp. Not goes to camp, my friend. He saves that camp. Ernest saves camp. Right? No, it's actually goes to camp.

He does save the camp, though. Well, of course he saves it. You're just talking about Ernest saves Christmas. I put in Ernest saves into Google, and it's finished with Christmas, but I'm still going to change it to camp just to see if I get any hits. Okay. Ernest goes to camp is the first result, but I can scroll for a while. Hmm.

Ian, you did a hell of a job. You're doing good this episode, man. Hmm. Ian, you did a hell of a job. You're doing good this episode, man. Thanks. Very not scary. Very safe. Jamie Orlando, you

want to try to go? Oh, yeah. You want to try to keep this going? Fade this down a bit. I'm going to keep it going, but I'm going to switch gears a

little bit here. What do you mean? Like physically? Like genre're like a machine? I'm going to take you to a new zone. Different zone. I can go to an amusement park. I'm going to take you to the zone of Andrew Bernstein.

You know this guy? You read about this guy? I feel like we've played this tape too before. I don't think you did. Maybe we did. I searched the archives. Did you really? So, Andrew Bernstein, Horse Lords, Teeth Collection. Teeth Collection?

This one's on a... Wait, what? What did you say? What did you say? What the fuck did you say, brother? From Teeth Collection. Isn't that the name of the project? Teeth Collection? Yeah. Is that too scary? No, that's somebody else. That's Matthew... you say, brother? From Teeth Collection. Isn't that the name of the project? Teeth Collection?

Yeah. Is that too scary? No, that's somebody else. That's Matthew. Oh, I'm sorry. Teeth Mountain. Teeth Mountain. All right.

Sorry. Too many teeth. This one's on Hasu Mountain. The A side is like solo saxophone. That's a Hasu Mountain tape? Yeah. Circular breathing type. Are you sure, brother?

Yeah. It's incognitoito the art is definitely different yeah totally yeah man that's like they're embarrassed to be on hasu mountain or something yeah you might as well had another label put that out we definitely played this tape before because i feel some of these bits have been used before okay i'm saying so this is one where i sort of had to uh fast forward a little bit because it starts off a little bit scary, but then it becomes less scary. So scary in what way? Just a little bit like moody and a little pensive.

And I don't know. Mike pensive? Mike pensive. So I'm going to start it like kind of in the middle of the A side here. Describe the artwork. It sort of reminds me a little bit of like. It's a little bit 80s. Pretty interesting, but it's pretty damn scary.

I don't want to say like a new age tape. I don't know. I see a bunch of like electricity and... From the look of it, I would think it was like a minimal electronic kind of thing. I mean, it looks like, you know, it's just got the blue bar across the top. It's got this black square of, what are those?

Some sort of like... Squiggles. Squiggles. Some zappy squiggles. Zaps, definitely. This is also a 2015 tape. Ian, turn this down real quick. Let me just stop it.

Most of these have had the date. Ian, what do you mean this is also a 2015 date? We played other tapes that are from 2015. What was the other tape that was 2015? The Traducci Bocci on Discog said it was 2015, but it's been proven otherwise. It's 2014. The Harmonia tape reissue was 2015.

Okay, I'm sorry. I came at you pretty hard there, and I apologize. I'll cut that out to make it look like I'm the good guy. No, leave it in. I need that win. Trying to take that out to make it look like I'm the good guy. No, leave it in. I need that win. Trying to take that away from me, too. This will all be bleeped out. I'm sorry.

You will not get the win. I do apologize. You will not be receiving any wins today. Jeez. I mean, I guess a saxophone could be scary. Nah. Nah, saxophone. Nah, no way it could be.

There's no way. Jamie, can you think of any way a saxophone would be scary um yeah you can uh like isn't there a saxophone in Monster Mash that's a scary saxophone no Monster Mash is fun

it's not scary it's fun cause they're having a good time right I guess so where did we land on drone No, Monster Mash is fun. It's not scary. It's fun. Because they're having a good time, right? I guess so. Where did we land on Drone? I think the Drone is scary. I think the Drone is still out. Turn this down a little bit. Where did we land on Drone?

I kind of think it's scary because you wouldn't go to a spa and hear drone you would hear New Age there's a fine line so anything you don't hear at a spa is scary, that's how you know it's scary? well it's just damn man, that's a pretty tough anything

imagine us having this conversation and this dude's just here behind us and we're like, Andrew can you stop? thing. Imagine us having this conversation and this dude's just here behind us and we're like, Andrew! Andrew! Can you stop? Can you practice later? Take a breath. Take a breath.

I have to work in the morning! He's just making a face like he's not gonna... No way, man. I'm gonna yell at him one more time and you you stop it you oh never mind i got it andrew dude it's late i have to work in the mic andrew now this isn't scary at all Now I'm afraid I'm going to make it the second scary one You know what?

I'll do this because it's definitely not scary Andrew This is tight. Yeah, this is a good take. You said this is 2015? Yep. October. I'm just trying to catch you.

Yeah, in October. Really? Yeah. You're over there knowing that the month is coming. I'm looking at the Discogs page. Sorry. Jamie's plugged in. Did they hook you up with that jewel that you can put in your,

that glows when something on your want list goes up for sale? You know, I haven't seen that yet. You're a premium member? Yeah. Fade this down a little bit. That'd be cool. I'm going to play a tape, and it's not scary at all. And the name of the artist is Fun. Because Fun is a nice time.

A duo from Philadelphia who I don't think are... I haven't heard anything from Matt Raidman or... I feel like a dick because I can't remember the Z Radio dude's name. He had a big tuft of hair on top of his head and some glasses. I don't think I ever knew his name. But he knows who he wants! Me neither. Yeah, I haven't heard anything from Matt in a while.

Yeah, and Matt who... I talked to him. I tried to get him to play Final Friday But he knows who he wants. Me neither. Yeah. Yeah, I haven't heard anything from Matt in a while. Yeah, Matt who... I talked to him. I tried to get him to play Final Friday, and he said he was taking a little break, but he might come back. You got to do that sometimes. Me and him mostly talk about Pokemon Go. You still doing that, huh?

Yeah. How's that going for you? I'm almost level 40. Hey, Jamie, I got to ask you, how many of these things do you have? I've caught 30,000. 30,000? Too spooky. That is so many Pokemon. Where do you keep them all?

You must be using up all your data. So this is fun. This is fun. I remember they played at the bike shop and they were popping balloons. They always do wacky stuff. Their set was so good. Oh my god. They know no bounds with their wackiness.

This one's called Place Tapes. There's a few of these fun-looking tapes on the cover that say fun on them. And what label is this? Breath Mint. Breath Mint. Breath Mint. That's Matt Raymond's label. Breath Mint.

335. Breath Mint does a lot of CDRs, though. Do they have enough tapes to have a critical mass? 335. Breath Mint does a lot of CDRs, though. I don't, like... Yeah. Do they have enough tapes to have a critical mass of... Oh, big time. Okay.

Yeah, big time. A bunch of C1s and C5s. Oh, a ton of short ones. Yeah. Definitely does the short ones. I like the tapes on the cover of this seem so soft that they look like cookies or something, like rounded edges.

They look so delicious. I'm not scared at all. All right, we can agree, though, that this is not scary. No. You know, it sounds like, what are you doing? You know, you listen to it and you go, what? There's candy on the inside. There's even candy on the inside.

It's fun. It's candy. It's whatever the hell else you want. Have a good time. Be nice. All right, let's let this play for a little bit. No, no, we don't get any breaks if it's not spooky. Okay.

We have to stay on and provide content if it's not scary. That is a rule. You know this, Matt is a mailman. Do you think that's how he got P.O. Box 1? P.O. Box 1. P.O. Box 1, yeah. But he is an official USPS employee. I think that's why he's so good at Pokemon Go, because he's just always out on the streets. Is he

illegally allowed to do that? I don't know. That's government time. You can't play games on government time. Those Pokemon belong to the government. Now that's who we should be impeaching. Jesus. What are they doing? They say they're playing tapes, but I'm not sure.

I'm not sure that's what's going on right there. All right. Turn this up a little bit why Ian comes in with his. And Ian, don't be scary. Do not be scary. You got that one on top again. Don't pick that top one, yeah. You got that one on top again.

Did that come in the box? Oh, let me ask you this. When you bought that carrying case, was there any spooky tapes in it? No. Like they said, like Grandma's Last Days or something like that? There were no spooky tapes. Alright, good. Alright, what do you got?

I'm going to play this top one. Now, this is by an artist that has a slightly spooky name. You say slightly spooky. You say slightly spooky. It's beyond spooky. Alright. Artist name is... But he's a ghost?

He's a ghost? Gray ghost. Gray ghost? You think that's okay? The tape is called Meditations on Mindfulness. So what? So fucking what, Jamie? Great ghost, he said. Yeah. No way, man.

No way. You're lucky I can't find my wrong buzzer sound clip fast enough. I would fucking be hitting it like three... I'll do Netflix instead. I can't find it. I can't find it, so I'll do that. I can't believe you're going to play this shit. The cover of the tape

has some very pleasant waves crashing on rocks too scary very safe very safe spot so hold on so in this episode where it's going to be nice and it's going to be not scary and october is over yeah you brought something with ghost in the name yeah but play the play a. It's a very calming, mellow tape. Yeah, but it's already... It's all about the music. Just give it a chance. Let me say it.

What's our goblin on the... This is horrifying. This is horrifying. This is some of the scariest shit I've ever heard. This is drone. Are you kidding me? I will suck your blood. Jamie, you're making it worse.

That wasn't Jamie. That was on the tape. Hold on. Actually, hold on. Rewind it, and I want to see if that was on the tape. Jamie, do it again. Let's see if it was on the tape. Because it might have been Jamie, actually.

I will suck your blood. There it is again. Exactly the same. That was Jamie. Because it might have been Jamie, actually. I will suck your blood. There it is again. Exactly the same. That was Jamie. I saw you do that. I saw you laugh. Who put this tape out?

Oh, Constellation Tatsu, huh? I have a Constellation Tatsu tape. You put one out? No. Oh, God, no. I've sent them demos. No. Nothing of mine has come out on the label.

Thanks for bringing it up. No, I have a tape that I'm going to play on the label. Oh, tonight. This is a scary one, though. No, it's not. Number 51. They make us feel a little scared sometimes. Grey Ghost is Brian Griffith.

I could kind of hear this at a spa. Yeah. What kind of fucking weird spa are you going to? I go to a lot of spas. Do you go to spas? No. There's a lot about you. I'm dying to find out what kind of sick stories you hold.

I'm listening. Ian, I don't know, man. I'm going to vote. I think we need to take this down to a vote. We might need to take our second scary break. I think we've got to take a spook for this one. Jamie, are you spooked? I am spooked. You know what we're going to do?

This has never been done before. We're going to let this play, and then in a little bit I'll stop it and I'll put on my consolation tattoo tape and the listeners can play a little game of oh I wonder what this is and they can guess as they listen. Oh that's fun. And then we'll get it's so nice it's a safe game that you can play it's not like the knockout game it's not like lying down

in the middle of the road and let the cars go over you Tide Pod Challenge it's not like Tide Pod Challenge what else is a game that's not safe this is so safe that nothing's going to happen. But you could be playing like... Stand in front of a dartboard and another person throws darts at you. No way. No siree.

This is not going to be that. So for a moment, try to forget that this is Grey Ghost. Jamie, do the vampire thing one more time. And try to unload Christ. I'm not scared at all. Transylvania. Say another random spooky thing, and then mute us. Midnight. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. The you ¶¶ Thank you. And we're back.

Are we back? We're back. You didn't count it down, so I didn't know. Actually, I changed my mind. I like when you count it down. All right. Three, two, and we're back. We're back.

Okay. I can't tell if that was a joke. Are we back? We're back. We're back. Okay. I can't tell if that was a joke. Are we back? We're back. Constellation Tattoo. Something or other. I'm listening. Does anybody know?

Have you seen this? Have I shown you the artwork? Does anyone want to take a gander at what this is? I have no clue what it is. Jamie, I'm sure a pervert like you has the Constellation Tattoo Discogs page up in front of him. I don't, no. But I will say this is I'm not sure if I would call this

a drone, but it's definitely not as scary as Grey Ghost. It's not scary. There's birds chirping. I feel right at home. You think they recorded those birds themselves? You think that's a field recording? No one did. Ian, what do you think?

You're the genius in this topic. You can never tell with these experimental things. And you never want to guess because you don't want to be the one that's wrong. Quiet Evenings. That's who this is.

Is that Grant Evans and Rachel Evans? Yes. Split with former selves. It's Constellation Tattoo number nine. And it's got some... I always love that project name.

Quiet Evenings? Yeah. It's very nice. It's very nice. Who doesn't like a quiet evening? Self-referencing. Very safe. So safe.

Safe, yeah. Very safe. This is very pretty. Makes me feel very good. Daddy, chill. Would you hear this at a spa? Jamie, at the six spas you go to. Oh, certainly.

Yep, yep. Playing this in the steam room. See, I imagine you're going to some weird spa where they play, like, power electronics. And it's very scary and smells very off. Yeah. So, so far, how many... Real quick, I'm going to take this out just to...

Is that your mic again, man? Dave is going to have you on a platter. Man, I'm not even touching the thing, man. Dave is going to... Or is your foot touching it? No. Do you have enough slack? What is your issue?

Maybe there's too much slack. There's too much slack. You need more strain relief. Sometimes I can't, like, I don't notice the white noise because of the tape hiss. Some of these outsiders, listen, they do it on purpose sometimes. They do it on purpose.

They do it on purpose where they'll put a hiss or even a feedback sound. They'll put it in there, and then you'll say, huh, you couldn't figure out how to get that out? Then they'll say, no, I did that on purpose. You've got to make it lo-fi. They're calling it lo-fi now. Ian, have you heard about this lo-fi

that they're doing? I just heard about it the other day. What do you think about it? I'm still undecided. So you're one of these undecided voters they keep talking about in the polls. They don't know if drone is scary. I need a lot of time to think about it.

You don't know if lo-fi is scary or okay. And they call you up, who are you going to vote for? I don't know. Look, don't rush me, okay? Mayor Pete looks nice, but you're one of these guys. Look at the spools on this thing. Or not spools. What do you call those?

Reels, right? Yeah, spools. But in this context, they look like tape reels. This tape is insane. A clear shell. Let's each say one thing. We'll go around, so we'll each say one thing. A clear shell.

Ian, Ian. Me and Jamie are going to do it. A clear shell. Some white reels. You know what it looks like? It looks like the Utsman. It's got big white reels. You know what it looks like? It looks like the Uts man. It's got big white reels in the middle that are his eyes,

and then the bottom, these workings, are his mustache. The mustache. I see that, yeah. That's actually too scary. When I see that now, that's too scary. That is pretty scary. I can't unsay it, can I?

It's so scary, but it looks beautiful. I'm going to say that's not spooky. Yeah, I don't think that's enough to get our third'm gonna say that's not but yeah i don't think that's enough to get our third spook that's this is not enough to do with a spook but i am feeling some pressure because i think i'm up next pretty good oh yeah you're the only one so far that hasn't done a spook yeah i did the first spook ian did a spook so i think um this tape that i brought here is by Junior Panday. Junior Panday.

This is on Spring Break Tapes. It's the first release. It's another early release on a label that is beloved. I think this, genre-wise, will be switching gears a bit again. You're a bit of a gear switcher tonight. Oh my god. I hit the cable, but there's no white

noise. If there was white noise, noise though how would you know again with these guys you can see that this I queued this tape up because the beginning was a little bit scary so I brought it past the scary part and we're in the clear

alright and you know the art very unassuming you know just art Very unassuming You know just some writing Nice rich blue shell Back off that mic a little bit Spring break You're yelling at me

That's scary Like we're not talking about the fall You're real loud Okay Too loud? You hear this music that's playing man? Yeah Cool it out man

Take a chill pill Turn it over Okay Pretty good man. Cool out, man. Take a chill pill. It's called Tape One. It's the first tape on Spring Break Tapes. What was it? Very nice and not scary, right? Yeah. Not scary in caps. Well, I would say Jamie, hand me the tape.

I wouldn't say this is... so far they've been like a quiet evening, a free kitten, things that are nice. Yeah. That are safe. But like, actually, you know, and I'm looking at your Andrew Bernstein cult appeal, a cult, cults are scary. True. Can we, are you allowed, or no you can't like nullify you can't you can't impeach no i think we're past the statute of limitations how do you impeach a podcaster who's done nothing wrong how do you do it

this is a uh justin paroff let's see this person is But why is it nice? Is it just... It's just not scary? Yeah, there's no ghosts or ghouls anywhere in sight with this tape. Okay, so it doesn't make you feel especially safe. Yeah, this is nice. Okay, I'm not scared at all. It's pretty great. Are either of those labels still doing stuff i think dinz is still putting out stuff

are they i don't know about spring break i think that may be sort of done nothing this year jamie discogs nothing this year on spring break there we go what do i have to look up what a release number did spring break get up to? They got up to... And was the number funny? 39? It's half funny. It's half funny. It's half funny?

What do you mean it's half funny? It's got a nine in it. Is 78 as funny to you? No. Is that what you're saying to me? I'm not a math guy, Jamie. You're going to have to explain this one to me. Denzu Artifacts has already surpassed it.

I'm more of a comedy fella. More of the funny shit on my end. What's Dinsu at? 46. That's not funny either, though, is it? There's a 6. It's in the wrong place, though. It's in the wrong place. I see what they did. I see what he's doing.

So the one release number begins with six and the other label's release number ends with nine. Yeah. So he is doing a number joke. Okay. All right. That is funny. That is nice.

That's very nice and not scary. Joe McKay does Monty Burroughs. That's who runs both those labels, right? The guy who made the 69 joke? Yep. A very funny one, by the way. I don't know.

A little bit of cancel culture happening on the Denzel label. I don't know if we should talk about it. Turn this down. Turn it down. We absolutely should. Gossip. Who got canceled? Angel Dust should talk about it. Turn this down. Turn it down. We absolutely should. Gossip. Who got cancelled? Angel Dust.

Remember that? Get out of here. Get out of here, man. That's old news. It is old news. Get out of here. I don't want to talk about that. Cancel culture. That's a topical thing, man. I hear you're going to get cancelled, Jamie. Once my dossier drops. This is tight. Fader down a bit. I'm going to talk about my next one and i don't know i need i need guidance on whether or not this is scary or not and i feel like i'm going to get two different responses

so this i have a treetops tape because treetops right it's fall they're pretty people like to watch the leaves change colors. But Jamie, have you ever listened? Have you ever really... And Ian, I notice you're on your phone. What are you doing? I'm checking Discogs. I'm listening. I'm turning up treetops. I'm listening.

Have you ever really listened to the song Rock-A-Bye Baby? Rock-A-Bye Baby on the treetop. When the wind blows, the cradle will rock and then the baby falls out of the tree. It's not nice. It's not nice, but is it scary?

Yeah. So you think it's scary, but we all think it's scary then. So is tree... Now, we can't figure out if a drone is scary. We can't figure out if a saxophone is scary. Is treetop scary? Should I even attempt to play the treetop tape? Well, just because it's a treetop doesn't mean that there's a baby on top of it.

This is a split with Infinity Window that came out on Arbor. Arbor tapes. I don't know the date. And I'm really surprised Jamie's not just saying it right now. I only discogs my own stuff. Okay. It's some kind of personal rule you have to set for yourself.

Your wife was coming downstairs at like 2 in the morning. Jamie, come to bed. I'm just going to Discogs one more thing. Treetops is Mike Pollard who used to run Arbor and Young Tap gosh more drone I know man well a lot of that's the thing when you look when I'm looking for tapes you go up there and it's

like oh here uh I'll grab this uh I'm trying to think of a good example on the fly I can't see anything but imagine if I came up with a good example. Imagine if I... Even like something like Giant Claw. Look at a Giant Claw tape. A Giant Claw? A Giant Claw. That's okay! In what situation do you feel safe when there's a Giant Claw? I thought Giant Claw is based off like an old horror movie or like a Godzilla type movie.

Too scary! Are you trying to make the point that it's not scary? No, I'm trying to make the point that it's extra scary. Yeah, it's totally scary. Yeah. What about like, Ian, just point at one. I see one that says blood music. Blood music.

Yeah, blood music. Exactly. It's like you're not even trying to not be scary. Even something like Rotten Bone. That's scary. UFO, FBI. Scary. Scary as. That's scary. UFO, FBI. Scary. Scary.

Too scary. I bet you your only safe haven with these tapes, with these, I don't want to say it, but with these sickos, your only safe haven is in Drone. So you know what? I'm changing my answer. Drone is not scary. Taking a stand. I'm taking a stand. Drone is not scary taking a stand i'm taking a stand drone is not scary

i love the um this label i don't think they were around for for too long it was like sometime in the mid 2000s what do you call that time period the aughts the aughts in the aughts they put out like uh you know the skaters and uh you know, all that kind of shit. Rope door. And a lot of, maybe some Emerald stuff was on that label. It was the mid-2000s. So you get the idea. I do marijuana sometimes.

But definitely not scary. This makes me feel like I'm sort of... Ian, I gotta ask you, man. What does this tape make you feel like? I don't know. Oh, come on. Don't leave me hanging now that I said it. It feels like right before you fall asleep, you're just calm. A funny feeling called fear.

Right before I fall asleep is when I'm at my wildest. I'm getting it all, I'm in the basement at the puncher bank, and then I just pass out. Just crash. Drone music makes me feel like I'm playing my keyboard and my sustain pedal got stuck, and now it just keeps going. That happen to you all the time? And I'm trying to figure out how to unsustain it. Oh, is this an edition of 35?

That can't be right. The Discog says Tour Split. Where did I get it? Yeah, it says inside edition of 35. That's very nice. Now I'm not scared at all. If I was going to be scared, that has passed. An infinity window. I think that's the OPN. Is that Daniel O'Patton?

Yeah, and Taylor Richardson. That's the big times. And if we come back to you, Are you going to do a spooky one? Or can you do a not scary one? I think I can do a not scary one But I have a question First Okay, let's hear it

Turn this down a little bit What's your question? Am I allowed to, and is it If it's play a CD, no Am I allowed to, and is it Not If it's play a CD, no. The answer is no. Am I allowed to, and is it not spooky to play a bootleg? Oh, Jesus Christ. Jamie, I think we might have to have a meeting about this. I didn't know what the precedent was.

I'm going to say right now, I'll say this. When you said the word bootleg, Jamie, I saw an icy look in his eye. Like he was concerned. So, he was, like, concerned. So, I'm going to say, here's my thing. You know I'm... Ian, look me in the eye, brother. You know I'm cool. You know I would let you play bootleg.

I'm afraid of what Jamie might do if we play bootleg. He might flip this table like a long game of Monopoly has been going on. I really don't want to upset Jamie. I'm okay with some bootlegs, but I feel like John Pyle, he does the Xeroxing.

That's a little bit too scary. He Xeroxes it more than once. Well, did you bootleg this tape yourself? No, I did not. So you bought an unauthorized bootleg? I don't know if I should reveal my source. Oh, I don't want you. Yeah, don't snitch on Tabs Out.

Please don't. Please don't. That's worse than getting canceled. Yeah. Are you kidding me? I will say that it's from... Are you kidding me? It's the scariest thing that could happen.

I will say that it's... Don't give any information. Don't give any leads to your bootleg guy. I was just going to compliment them. Don't even do that. Don't even do that because the compliment itself might be might be a hint or a clue anybody all right this is a bootleg this is a bootleg of a uh terry riley and krishna bott's performance from uh 1987 and i'm gonna take a guess on who bootlegged this for you.

Let me just say this. Did the person who bootlegged this for you, the bootlegger, have you played another tape by something on their label tonight? That's going to be such a dead giveaway. Have I? Have you? You've played so far.

What, two tapes? Let me review. You need a review? I have not. You have not? Okay, it's not who I thought it was. Damn, I normally get those bootleg things right. Okay.

He's a very mysterious person. What's with this J card? They just fucking take a piece of paper and draw on it? Yeah. Hand that over. I think it's a piece of construction paper. This is an awful... This isn't construction paper. Are you kidding me?

This is text weight. I mean, it's nice paper, but it's just A and it says music 20 minutes and then B, music 38 minutes. Why do they have to write music? Isn't it just assumed? There's an interview at one part, so I think they were. Okay.

Oh, an interview from 1987? Yeah, with Krishna Bhatt. Okay. Oh, my God. Ian, did you not read the date? Have you not looked at that yet this whole time you had this bootleg? I didn't look at the date. It's from 6-9-87.

That is really fucking good, man. I can't believe you've never noticed that before. You're really dropping the ball on funny numbers. We were literally just talking about how that number was funny. Wait a minute. What's going on with these? What'd they cover the tabs

up with? Oh, Jesus Christ. Is that packing tape? No, not packing tape. Yeah, it's going on with these? What'd they cover the tabs up with? Oh, Jesus Christ. Is that like packing tape? No, not packing tape. Yeah, it's like... Masking tape. It's masking tape. And it just... That's not gonna hold up.

This will not stand the test of time. Sure will. This bootleg, no. Like, sans through the hourglass, this bootleg is gonna be gone. And you know what's the real shame about it, about this shoddy presentation? Is this is a nice shell.

This Maxell shell is all black around the outside but clear in the middle. You have to embrace that. This is very nice. I might peel this tape off of you. Alright, this isn't a spooky break, but let's let this play for a moment. Yeah, sure. Thank you. We're back. I want to give away this clue. So the person who made this bootleg,

Ian did not play. I'll say this. This is all I'll say. Did Ian play a tape tonight? By someone? I did did not Ian did not Ian didn't what was the thing I said that they run a label the person who made this bootleg did they run a label that Ian played something from tonight right that Ian played wait wait a minute your honor that Ian played tonight no not Ian I know

not Ian that's correct that's No, not Ian. I know. Not Ian. That's correct. That's all I'll say. All I'll say is that and it was ducked from House of Mouth. And that's all I'll say. I'm going to jail. All right, we've got to stop. You're not going to jail.

He's going to jail. And you know what? He also smokes weed. So they should pick him up on two. Allegedly. Allegedly. So they also need to pick him up on that. Jesus Christ!

All right, Jamie, I think you just need to... I think I got a few here that I was going to play that were definitely not scary. And I just don't think we have time for them. I think you need to just end this with one. And scary or not. And just the fact that it's

ending, I think, is scary enough. Wait, we need to call J.O.B. Oh yeah, that's right. We have to call J.O.B. Oh, yeah, that's right. We have to call J.O.B. My dear boy, it must be done. You think he's doing something scary right now? That motherfucker, something sick. He's doing something gross.

Not scary, though. I wouldn't be scared by it, at least, because I've seen it all. I've seen everything that he does. You think he's standing by? Waiting for the call? Even though he has no clue we're doing this? Yeah, I do. He's always...

If he doesn't answer on the first attempt, it always... He always at least calls back. And you gotta figure, I don't think Jamie's calling him any other day of the week, right? Probably not. No, I don't really call Joe B. It's been forwarded to an automatic voice message.

That didn't work this time. He'll call back. He always does. He's thirsty to get on there. All right, Jamie. So here's a tape that I have that... Let me just say this. Yeah.

This can end two ways, my friend. It can end nice and safe and not scary at all. And Radio Shock, who was kind enough, which is that name I got to say. I think we've all been dancing around it all night. This is scary. Yeah. It is scary. Yeah. It is scary to be shocked.

We can end it like that and everybody's happy just as intended. Or you can spook me. Okay. So I have yet another tape from 2015 here. Wait a minute. Just so we're all clear. That Ashley Spears tape was from 2014. It was very much pressed onto the shell with ink.

Okay. Do you guys remember Adhesive Sounds? I do. Sure. Looks like from Canada. This is a tape by two, it's like a male collab type tape by two artists I'm not familiar with named... He's a ghost? Siami and Albino Deers.

But he's a ghost? The first one is from New Zealand. The other is from Rome. He's a ghost? Rome first one is from New Zealand. The other is from Rome. He's a ghost? Rome, Italy. Italian. These aren't scary places. No, no.

This is just a really beautiful tape. I really like this one. I'm going to play a cut from the middle of the B-side. Did you have to fast forward through more scary stuff? A little bit, yeah. Are you serious? Yeah. I don't have very many tapes that aren't 100% not scary.

Maybe Tradition Bachi, but everything's a little bit scary. They make us feel a little scared sometimes. It's pretty deep. I mean, I got to say, Jamie, I appreciate the effort that you put in to listen to the tapes and just gone. Yeah. It's still a little too scary. Yeah.

Until you found something that wouldn't spook the hell out of me. That's very nice. I'm almost picturing like we should come up with some kind of committee that rates tapes on their scariness. No, it's like the Wild West out there. That's how I like it. Is it adhesive sounds? Are they around anymore? I doubt it. I'll check. I feel? Are they around anymore? I doubt it.

I'll check. I feel like when I asked that question, the answer is normally no, or they just stopped sending me tapes. Oh, wow. They did put out stuff in 2019. Didn't they turn into like a vaporwave label at some point?

Does that sound familiar? It sounds familiar. It's the vaporwave. We'll get some of these people. It's so tempting because of the shapes and the aesthetic. People love it. All of a sudden, you're just into it. You're putting it out, which is fine.

So who do you think tonight, in this very not scary episode, who do you think was the least scariest? Who gets the least scariest award? I think it's got to be Jimmy because he hasn't played any... You haven't had any spooks. I haven't spooked yet. Unless you guys are getting a little bit spooked by this.

This is not spooky to me. No, this makes me feel very good. I was going to say, do you want to grab another tape just to end with a real... I see behind you there's some Al-Qaeda tapes. We could end with that. Maybe a crazy Doberman.

We were doing so well. Do you, do you want to find just the scariest shit you can to really like flip my bean? If you don't get the scariest, you might as well not do it at all. I can't even read this. Does it say damnation frequencies?

Let me see what you got here. Okay, what is this? This is on God's a Tundra. Cannibal frequencies. Cannibals are scary. That sounds really scary. Is this the scariest you can find, though? I see a box up there that says journey into pain.

That scares me. You probably have a scary box somewhere with, like, the really scary things. I don't open it. I don't open it anymore, unless Dave's here. I'll only do it if I have help. You know what? No, let's not do anything scary. This is so pure and so beautiful.

We're really spending this time together. Let's just let this play. I'm not scared at all. And I'm glad October is over. It is now November. We got daylight savings times. Everybody's circadian rhythms are messed up. But you get an extra hour.

Yeah. This is very nice. And I'm glad a lot of people like to, you know, do a lot of, like, theme stuff for Halloween. Make it all spooky. I'm glad we could do something that's not spooky. Yeah. And this is a very nice way to end it.

Well, thanks for NP Lockwood for coming up with the theme. Yeah. Another Pokemon Go player, by the way. Turn it off. you