Tales from the Stinky Dragon - C03 - Ep. 26 - From On Hyra - Up to Shananigans

Episode Date: September 17, 2025

B-Team meets Gunther's Aunt Shanan in a ‘duelistic’ way, receives their next mission, and begins to traveling back to Fort Endridge.Support us directly on Patreon https://www.patreon.com/stinkydra...gon - get access to ad-free episodes, bonus content like Stinky Dragon Adventures & Second Wind, our patreon-exclusive discord, and more!Check out our new Gunther & Kanon merch at store.stinkydragonpod.com ! Follow us on our socials at https://linktr.ee/TalesFromTheStinkyDragonCast: Gus Sorola, Blaine Gibson, Barbara Dunkelman, Jon Risinger, Chris DemaraisWriter/Editor/Composer: Micah RisingerProducer: Benjamin Ernst Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 Got to be honest, shopping for a car used to make me second-guess everything. Is this a good price? Am I being upsold? Am I missing a better deal somewhere else? That's why I'm glad I found car gurus. It took all that uncertainty and threw it out the window. With hundreds of thousands of cars from top-rated dealers, I could finally compare options side by side,
Starting point is 00:00:20 and no for sure I wasn't getting taken for a ride. The advanced search tools, the unbiased deal ratings, even the price history, they gave me everything, I needed to feel confident. And clearly, I'm not alone. Car gurus is the number one rated car shopping app in Canada on the Apple app and Google PlayStores. That says something.
Starting point is 00:00:39 Buy your next car today with Car gurus at car gurus.ca. Go to car gurus.ca. To make sure your big deal is the best deal. That's C-A-R-G-U-R-U-S dot CA. Car gurus.com. You get access to exclusive dining experiences and an annual travel credit. So the best tapas in town might be in a new town altogether. That's the powerful backing of Amex.
Starting point is 00:01:20 Terms and conditions apply. Learn more at Amex.ca.com. During the Volvo Fall Experience event, Discover exceptional offers and thoughtful design that leaves plenty of room for autumn adventures. And see for yourself how Volvo's legendary safety brings peace of mind to every crisp morning commute. This September, lease a 26 XE90 plug-in hybrid from $599 biweekly at 3.99% during the Volvo Fall Experience event. Conditions supply, visit your local Volvo retailer or go to explorevolvo.com. Complements to all you, Quaggaths, climb into the stinky dragon and knock back our latest liquid, four scorn and seven years ago.
Starting point is 00:02:26 It's a mixture of lemon-lime spite, old resent mint leaves, grievance green tea bags, stewed sugar, and topped with diced sour grapes. One gulp of this gilt-ridden grog, and you'll still remember what they did last summer. Previously, our adventurers recalled their resurfacing from the Saline Sea thanks to the sea drinker and learned some long-distance New Orde-Lore. They flash-forwarded into the fray of today and wayfared their way to the untamed flame forge. But what was a welcome wagon sharp turn to a showdown with Shannon? latch on to our libation and let's leap into our lore Hello everyone, welcome to Tales from the Stinky Dragon. I'm your dungeon master Gustavo Sorolla
Starting point is 00:03:22 and I'm going to hit our four players with an arrow. There it is. You could just ask us a question. I think I'm going to be the dungeon master for the day. I'm going to, I'm going to challenge your authority, Gus. And today I will be the dungeon master. Let's put it up for a vote.
Starting point is 00:03:38 Everyone raise your hand if you want Blaine to be a dungeon master. I. Oh. Two. Three. That's voted against him. Go for it. Welcome to Tales to the Steaky Dragon.
Starting point is 00:03:50 I'm your dungeon master, Blaine Gibson. And I'm going to hit our four players with the narrow. Oh, pew, pew, pew. banter, funny banter. All right, let's roll this stupid dice. All right, I'm going to roll a D20. Let's figure out. Five.
Starting point is 00:04:06 18. Can't wait for Blaine's tavern tale whenever that is where he gets to actually be the DM. Dude, it's coming. I came up with him last night. I was supposed to add our initiative modifiers to this role. Just kidding. I'm just kidding.
Starting point is 00:04:17 I'm just kidding. The tradition continues. Maddie trips and falls and tis. It takes three points of damage. It's fine. I'll take it. I rolled an eight. No, no.
Starting point is 00:04:32 Micah put in chat, BM, Blainemaster, but I thought he put bowel movement. Yeah, that's a BM. That's a BM. Looks like we got Gunther with an 18, Doug with a 17,
Starting point is 00:04:42 Natty with an 8, and 12 with a 5. Woo. All right. So, oh, I didn't even ask the question. You distracted me with your BM. If you won the lottery, what would you do with your money?
Starting point is 00:04:52 And that was suggested by, but there's like four names on here. short question to be submitted by four people. Lorena Hemple, Wirwin, Fred Jordan, and Loose Goose. I think some of those are real names and some of them aren't. The third. The third. Loose Goose, the third.
Starting point is 00:05:06 If you won the lottery, what would you do with your money? And we're starting off with Gunther. I'm Chris Maris. I play Gunther the fighter. If I won the lottery, I would hire so many spies and investigators to find the Eden who attacked my village. And then I would track him down and take matters into my own hands. and hopefully not die.
Starting point is 00:05:28 I don't know that that would cost what you would earn from winning the lottery. I saw a billboard and I think you could get that pretty affordably done. There's a lady in Waco. She can do it for a couple thousand maybe. Investigate. Call five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five. I always see your signs like private eyes.
Starting point is 00:05:49 Oh, yeah, yeah. Okay, so vengeance, got it. Remind me to never get on Gunther's bad side. Gunther, you're wonderful. Thank you for answering the question. And you're definitely honing in. You have that one true purpose. And I hope we get to go on this journey with you, Gunther.
Starting point is 00:06:03 Next up, we've got Doug with a 17. Hello, I'm Barbara Duncleman and I play Doug Boone, the male bugbear artificer level six. And you know, I've done a long and hard if I would win the lottery, what I would do. First, I would take a portion of it and put it into my investment account. Smart. Like an IRA?
Starting point is 00:06:25 Exactly. And I don't know if, like, the Motelian has, like, a 401k or if they do, like, matching or anything like that. But I probably invest a little bit into that. And then I think I would spend the rest on my very own Batcave, you know, like an underground laboratory with all my inventions and, you know, maybe get a little butler myself, maybe a batler, maybe a guy named Quiffley, perhaps. And then, you know, just really, you know, build it out. Make it pretty cool down now. Why underground? Because that's what the Batcave is.
Starting point is 00:06:57 Yeah, but that's because that's Batman's theme. I'm just curious how that pertains to Doug's persona. Because they're a bug bear. Yeah, it's a cave. Caves are typically, you know, below surfaces. Okay. I just, then I would say a bear cave, not a bat cave. I'm a big fan of Batman.
Starting point is 00:07:15 Okay, that's all I wanted. I just wanted to know is Doug a fan of Batman, and that's why. Then that works. Yeah, I'm Doug Boo. Where is she? That's what I'll say when we're looking for your wife, Gunther. Where is she? I know where she is at my home.
Starting point is 00:07:36 Oh, okay. Exactly where you left her. Yes. Doug, would you evict the bats or would they stay in there with you? Well, I understand the confusion, Gustavo. There's no actual badge in this bad cave. It's a non-heavy cave. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:07:50 So it's just a cave. Exactly. And I am DeVam. Okay. Micah suggests maybe you could just line the walls
Starting point is 00:07:58 with baseball bats. Ah, I see. Yeah, self-defense. You know. Yeah. It's like a vintage collection or something.
Starting point is 00:08:05 All right. Doug, thank you for the journey. We went on there. Very welcome. The puzzle. I thought it was
Starting point is 00:08:15 pretty straight forward. It was. A lot of follow-up. Questions. Next step, we have, I believe, Natty with an eight.
Starting point is 00:08:22 How do you? all, it's John Reisinger, and I play Natty Wonder, the Drow, Warlock, drag queen, mother of the harbinger of the apocalypse. Nope, just a little demon that wants to end everything. If I were to get the lottery and become filthy, filthy rich, I would do probably one of two things. I'd either one, put it into some sort of trust for Giggy to be able to access when he is older and mature enough to use funds in a responsible way. So it might never be touched. Ha, ha, that's just a joke.
Starting point is 00:08:58 I love my baby. I'll take a long while. Honestly, I probably just donate it all to my mama's temple back in my hometown. Just because, you know, they could always use more funds to, like, you know, help the temple or help the community around them or, you know, just do anything like that. I just trust them with the money instead. So the church thermometer would fill up completely and then explode at the top? No more car washes.
Starting point is 00:09:24 They'd be all good. New rec center. New rec center. Yeah. Somehow that really tracks. I don't know what I would have expected from you, Natty, but that seems right. That seems to go totally in with what I would expect. What do I need to be rich for?
Starting point is 00:09:38 Yeah. Well, you know, if you want a back cave or something, you know, it costs a lot of money. Well, actually, as a drought, I would like an underground cave. So it actually makes sense. Do a lot of your family plays a lot of? lottery, Natty? You got a proud lottery playing tradition? No, we don't have the lottery in my community. I had to quickly
Starting point is 00:09:58 look it up on one of Doug's little handheld devices, what the lottery was. Oh, interesting. Okay. Yes, I have a handheld device that explains what the lottery is and that's the only function of that handheld device. It's called a wikidug.
Starting point is 00:10:13 Ah. Wikidugia. Okay, cool. Thanks. And last up with a five, we've got Toll. Hey, it's Blaine, your dungeon master. I also play Toll, the male Thaumetech Barbarian. I need to update my character sheet. How many weeks is this now? I, no, it's just, I'll do it later. Talk to you next. Noxie next recording. Let's put the problem. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. The Blaine Gibson Way. And I play Tollv. You hoot me, Toll and Gustavo. So many questions that I must ask. I mean, nobody talking scratchoffs or Powerball. What money amount of it. talking about. We're talking, let's put it in the powerball range. Oh, lots of money.
Starting point is 00:10:57 Yeah. Scratchers are a lot of money, but a different tier. Yeah, not like the same level of life changing. Okay, several things. First of all, I would hire a series of private investigators to find the rest of my family. That's like maybe 0.2%
Starting point is 00:11:14 of the winnings. That's really not expensive, so I don't know what Gunther's doing. And then after that, I think I would take care of my friends, you know, and give them a little bit of cash and, uh, you know, make sure that they're well taken care of. And then I would do that anonymously, though, because you do not want them to come back and say, oh, I spent all of the money. Please give me more. Yeah. And then I would get like a personal finance guy to tell me exactly how much I want to keep for having a good, comfy lifestyle.
Starting point is 00:11:44 And then I would donate the rest because there's no good billionaires and no one person needs all of that money. It's stupid. I agree. You can't spell Agreed without greed. It seems like it's, I do find it a little strange that two of our party members went the private investigator route. So it's, it's, it's, it tells a lot about, uh, what we got going on here. We're lazy.
Starting point is 00:12:08 We don't want to do the adventure ourselves. Oh, we're just so dedicated to the mission at hand that you guys, uh, you know, want to hire out to do other things that you need done. You're right. And as we all know, subcontracting. hiring advisors or whatever. That's the way to do it. It will be to spread out work so that it is done more efficiently. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:12:30 I don't know what we're talking about. I'm making a joke about how, uh, never mind. What were we got to cut it? I just remember we got a lot, a lot of, had a lot of funny money sitting out to contractors for silly things. And, uh, that could have gone to like lovely shows like Tales from Sticky Dragon.
Starting point is 00:12:47 Anyways, that's corporate America for you, dude. I never heard of her She's a drag queen Corporate America That's actually a great I was gonna say That's a great drag queen name I hope she's got a monocle
Starting point is 00:13:01 Before we dive into this episode Let's clarify I think we had talked a little bit About who team leader was And joked a little bit about it last episode I want to make sure we're all on the same page So where are we at team leader wise It was me and Doug playing hot potato
Starting point is 00:13:15 With responsibilities Yeah I mean go ahead Swap it up as much as you want I vote for Nadi. I vote for Nadi. I give my vote to Natti. Okay. I vote third party.
Starting point is 00:13:30 Okay, Gunther's throwing his away. All right. I guess I'm team leader. I'm going to write that in my note. All right. This looks like the place. Gauter, are you ready to see her on? December is anxious to talk to her.
Starting point is 00:13:44 Hello! Gunther calls out hello and the door slowly opens. revealing a thickly built, youthful-looking thode. The smell of smoke comes out from the building, and you see some smoke appear behind her. She is clad in obsidian iron, like a combination of obsidian and iron. She looks at you four and says,
Starting point is 00:14:05 I am Shannon Egan's windbreaker. Who are you? I am Gunther Bukke's windbreaker. Gunther Bucke's windbreaker? On guard! She leaps forward and attacks you. What? Shannon flies through the air,
Starting point is 00:14:19 grace towards Gunther. She unsheathes a thick foil mid-air made of blackened metal like that of her armor. As she descends, her beefy thode legs and free arms shove your companions aside. Doug Nattie and Tolls, make me dexterity saving pros. I have advantage on this. 11. 12. Curricle fail and a 12, so I'll take that 12. Okay, those were not great dexterity saves. Thank you.
Starting point is 00:14:44 So all three of you fall to the ground, knocked prone by, uh, Shannon as she shoves you aside and you get a boo-boo on your bum. You take five points of bludgeoning damage. Five points. Wow. This girl hit is hard. Can I use a shield as a reaction for that or is it probably not worth it? Sure. I'll take it. Just take it. Was I raging? No. Okay. Shannon lands with surprisingly light feet and points her blade at Gunther's leather clad chest. I said on guard. Why do you want to fight? Rather than answer that question, I'm going to explain the dual mechanic to you. Oh.
Starting point is 00:15:23 So we're going to have like a dual mini game between Shannon and Gunther here. And it's kind of like rock paper scissors. So there'll be three rounds and each round both dualists secretly choose one action to perform. During the duel, both dualists can move as they wish, apply any magical effects that items may have. But there will be no bonus actions, reactions, or spells. So the three options you get, much like rock paper scissors, you can either push, parry, or faint. push it and not like that push beats faint
Starting point is 00:15:52 Perry beats push and faint and faint beats Perry and then there's special conditions for ties which we can go over as we go through you sure you want to do this with Chris the first time Perry the best of us
Starting point is 00:16:03 I could see his eyes gloss over already as you're just reading I sent him the things and so as Shannon you know pulls out her weapon and is pointing it at Gunther private parts starts elbowing you in the ribs daddy
Starting point is 00:16:17 What, what, private? Do you want to make a wager on who's going to win? Yeah. Why not? Let's have some fun. How much do you want to bet? How much money I got? I don't know.
Starting point is 00:16:28 I looked at my gold in a while. I'm going to bet everything. You're going to bet everything? I'm going to bet everything. 172 gold. Oh, my God. On who? On Gunther.
Starting point is 00:16:40 Oh, surprising. All right, Chris. Stakes are high. Don't mess this up. Wow. That's a lot of bunny. Okay. Private Parts scribbles it down on his notepad.
Starting point is 00:16:52 Are you good for that private? Are you good for that? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm not going to need to send Gigi after you if you lose. Oh, no, no, no. You know where I live. Yeah, I do. Actually, I don't.
Starting point is 00:17:05 Where do you live? We haven't talked at all about your background. Ford Endred, just like you. Okay, okay, okay. Yeah, let's see how this goes. Private Parts then walks over to Toll and says, Hey, Tov, you want to get in on this? Me and Natty are betting on the duel.
Starting point is 00:17:23 I think I will kindly pass. I am not much of a gambler. Oh, you don't have any money? Okay. I have more money than Natty and certainly will after Gunther loses. Hey, you know, go big or go home. You know, what's the money good for if I'm not here tomorrow? I don't know spending it on armor and equipment.
Starting point is 00:17:45 Natty learned what the lottery is and she's all in on gambling now. Yeah. I mean, I said I didn't know what the lottery was. I didn't say that Natty didn't know what gambling was. There's a lot of forms of gambling. Yeah, and Natty had that stint on a riverboat doing entertainment. It is true. There's a lot of gambling there.
Starting point is 00:18:03 Yep. Private parts will move on to Doug. Hey, Doug, you want to put some money on this? Is gambling legal here? I know in some places it's not. In some places it is, it's kind of a gray area. Yeah. Oh, it's okay. Here. It's just between friends. Sure. Why not? You know, take a chance. Try a little something risky once in a while, right?
Starting point is 00:18:19 Yeah, yeah, yeah. Let your fur down. Okay, okay. Don't let him hear when we say this. I think I'm going to bet on Shannon. Ooh, how much? She seems pretty, you know, she did knock us all down in one fell swoop, so it's pretty powerful. It's very true. Yeah, she's beefy. I'm going to bet one gold. Whoa.
Starting point is 00:18:37 Penny slots kind of guy. I got you. I'm going to go. Oh, okay. Yeah, I can match that. Yeah, I got you. Private Parts writes that down. All right. Getting back to the dual mechanic. So I'm going to give everyone kind of a job here, since this is a duel between Shannon and Gunther. Doug, I'm going to ask you to keep score.
Starting point is 00:18:58 And you're going to ask for the reveal of the moves each round. Okay. So to keep things fair between Gus and Chris, the actual humans here who are playing the game, what's going to happen is, Chris, you're going to happen is, Chris, you're going to going to send Blaine your tactic for the round and I'm going to send John my tactic for the round and when Barbara calls for them those people are going to reveal what we sent
Starting point is 00:19:20 them. So we're your managers? Yeah. Okay and remind me what beats what, like all the different outcomes of the game? You got it. Push beats faint, Perry beats push and faint beats Perry. God. I started to write these in my notes and immediately wrote Bush
Starting point is 00:19:38 beats faint like Georgia. W. Bush. Everyone, good? Yes. Chris just sent me a picture of my house and said, don't mess this up. I don't know what that means. Let's do this.
Starting point is 00:19:52 Yeah, Shannon points her foil up in front of her face and then brings it down and lunges at you, Gunther. Send your move to Blaine and I'll send mine to John. It has been sent to I not wish to fight you. Okay, I got it. And then Barbara, it's on Doug to call for the moves. All right, everyone, let's have a clean match here, all right?
Starting point is 00:20:12 Don't go in, no going below the belt or above the waist. Wait a minute. So there's a thin line right at the waist belt. There's a very thin line. I like to think Doug brings down one of those like wrestler announcer mics. Oh, right, ladies, gentlemen, we're going to a clean fight here in one corner, Gunther, Windbreaker. Yeah. Stormbreaker, what is it?
Starting point is 00:20:38 Is it Windbreaker? Bootcast, Windbreaker. There you go. And in the other corner, Shannon. Yay, Shannon. Go Shannon. It's a lovely day out of here in Megalabla Stadium. We got our two big contenders in the green corner and in the green corner.
Starting point is 00:20:57 All right. We're going to have a clean match of push Fain Perry. I literally was watching the Teenage Meadistrol movie this morning. Oh. I know you guys are frogs, but still I watched that last week. There you go. It's a good one. Holds up.
Starting point is 00:21:10 All right. Are we ready? In three. Yeah, I'm ready. Two. One, dual. Push. Faint.
Starting point is 00:21:16 Push beats faint. Oh, dang it. I'm on Gus's. I don't want that. I don't want Gus to win. Does it help that Chris misspelled faint? Like the fainting fain? So push beats faint.
Starting point is 00:21:30 So Gunther tries to move his rapier to pretend to attack, but Shannon sees right through it. And with her beefy arm, pushes forward. and shoves Gunther straight in the chest. Best two out of three! Gus, I want to bring Gunther back into my corner of the ring, and I'm going to pat him down with some ice, and I'll say, Okay, Gunther, how many fingers am I holding up? How many?
Starting point is 00:21:52 I can Z-5. No, that's six. There was one, yeah. There's six fingers. You missed the other hand. He had the other one behind his back, to be true. Okay, I think on this one, I think you should, I think you should push. Push.
Starting point is 00:22:06 You should push. Oh, head games. All right, round one If that goes to Shannon Not looking good for Natty and her bet This fight is brought to you by our sponsor It's frog juice Drink your delicious swamp water
Starting point is 00:22:20 With the zesty, yummy taste of frog juice All right, back to our fighters in the ring All right, so let's move on Doug, I know you're trying to move it along But yeah, you are correct Let's move on to round two Bing ding-ding Round two
Starting point is 00:22:33 Is it best two out of three or how are we playing here? Yeah, we're going to go three rounds, yeah The right girl is entered in with a billboard that says number two. It is a mosquito. I'm trying to make this like a boxing match. I don't know. I like it. In our DM chat, Ben was saying that that would be private parts holding up the round numbers.
Starting point is 00:22:53 Yeah. Oh, yeah. That's better. I thought you were about to make like a number two joke like poop. Oh, no, no. It sounds like nice. No, we are above that kind of humor here at Stinky Dragon. Yeah, I did just direct a video about Natty having poop and covered.
Starting point is 00:23:07 her and shut out B.M. soon. I have Shannon's move. I'm good. I got Chris's. Who's Chris? I got good through. Oh, no, no. I got Qantas. All right. Round two.
Starting point is 00:23:22 Shannon could take it all right to you right now. Let's find out what happens. Duel in three, two, one. Hit it. Push. Faint. Yeah. Oh, no.
Starting point is 00:23:32 Oh, no. Uh-oh. Once again, Shannon. Shannon suspects that Gunther is once again going to try the same maneuver and avoid combat. So she once again charges headlong in with a mighty push and shoves Gunther. And let's do the third round anyway. Why not? See how bad he could lose? I should have bet a little bit more than one goal now that I'm thinking about it.
Starting point is 00:23:58 After pushing you, Shannon takes a step back, looks at you, Gunther, and says, Show me your skills, young croak folk. And then charges in again. My skills are not. fight you, auntie. Auntie. All right. Well, there's really no point in doing the third round here.
Starting point is 00:24:15 You know, seeing a Shannon completely obliterated gun throw. But why not? Because we said we'd do three rounds of this and we are not liars. All right. I have Shannon's move. Chris's is in.
Starting point is 00:24:27 All right. The final duel in three, two, one. Hit him. Faint Perry. Yeah. It worked, Chris. You did it. It changed nothing.
Starting point is 00:24:39 Adrian! While it's top of mind, I'm equipping my shield, just for future reference. Okay. You both rush forward, lock weapons, and then Shannon pushes off from you. She lowers her foil and shakes her head disapprovingly. Oh, Gunther, you have much to learn. You have many tactical drawbacks and unpolished technique. Yet I see promise, raw talent.
Starting point is 00:25:03 Help everyone, inside. Shannon turns around and opens the door. What about, uh, what? about the results of our bedding. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So, uh, private parts begins, uh, walking around trying to settle the score. Uh, he walks up to you, Doug. And I says, one gold.
Starting point is 00:25:17 Here you go, Doug. Thank you. Private parts hands you the, uh, one gold, Doug. This is about to start my gambling addiction. And don't spend it all in one place. Uh, how I try. If you want to be cured of your gambling addiction, come with me. We're going to go talk to Daddy now.
Starting point is 00:25:34 Natty, I'm so sorry. I have failed you and myself. The private parts walks over to Natty, references paper, and says, Okay, 172 gold, Daddy. All right. Here's all the money that a single mom has hands it over to private parts. No, you're not allowed to do that. You should have thought about your child before you throwing it all away.
Starting point is 00:25:53 My inventory says zero. My inventory says zero. I ain't got no money. Thank you very much. So private, what are you going to do with your new lump sum of cash? Do you hire a private investigator? Yeah, I don't know. Oh, see, Private Parts won the lottery here.
Starting point is 00:26:09 We should have asked him the question during his arrow to figure that out. Listen, if we asked every NPC the arrow questions, we'd never get through the arrows. That's true. It's already long enough as is. Okay, so I'm going to re-describe this building because I think I described it last episode, but I have not described it. Is it a beefy building? I don't get it.
Starting point is 00:26:27 He kept saying beefy over and over again describing Shannon. It's funny. The adjective in the module is thick with two Cs, which I said once. last episode, and I felt weird about repeating it a bunch, so I went with beefy. Yeah, because when you say thick, with two Cs, you go thick. Yeah. Yeah. Okay, so it's a shack of a mishmash of metallic patchwork and hinges.
Starting point is 00:26:49 It's unusual architectural arrangement of slanted walls and roof. There's a squeaky hanging sign that reads Untamed Flamed Forge. We've heard that before. Have we not? Oh, yeah. This is where I have a pickup order for Bjorn. Yeah, it was in the note. And, yeah, you're supposed to come pick up the order from
Starting point is 00:27:07 Shannon. You saw, hi, Shannon. I am Gunther's friend, the guy that you just attacked, and I am here to pick up an order by the name of Bjorn. Shannon turns around, invites everyone in, and you walk into an oval-shaped room. It's humid, and the floor is like a pond of water, and there's floating furniture,
Starting point is 00:27:25 like lily pad seating, log beds, water lily, and lotus kitchenware. Cute. Yeah, and there appear to be two doors in this room, the front door to the west, which you walked in, and a backdoor to the east. And you ask about your delivery, Tov, was that correct? Yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:27:42 I have a note here, here's my receipt. Paul doesn't know how to pronounce receipt. It's a character thing. Sure. Thank you. Hmm, I see. You are here for the gavel of Gailstrom, then. That's the one, yep.
Starting point is 00:27:57 A gavel. It's like a cool, big hammer, I think. Yeah, and then as you were saying this, you know, you're looking around the room, Tov, as Shannon is trying to retrieve your item and a log comes floating by and hits you in the shin ouchy's great place you have here it hurts it really stinks after a moment Shannon pulls out a weapon and hands it over to you told the gavel of gaolstrom here very cool I found it do you have to add it to my inventory and tell about it yeah why don't you tell us about it this heraldic warhammer is furiously forged from the
Starting point is 00:28:28 anchor of the infamous ship the gelstrom with a squally scream of rage you are briefly possessed by the sea drinker and gain plus one to attack roles and damage rolls until the end of your rage. It has something called Storm Strike. I get one per long rest with the strike of your warhammer, i.e. attack. A blustery gale incites a howling rage into all the enemies and allies within a 10 feet radius. All creatures within range must make a DC-14 charisma saving throw. On a failed save, the creature is knocked prone by the blustery gale and becomes enraged for up to one minute. On a successful save, the creature is just knocked prone by the blustery. regale. The creature can repeat the saving throw at the end of its turn. A creature
Starting point is 00:29:09 automatically succeeds if it is immune to being charmed. And then there's another thing called blinded by rage. Enrage creatures lose the ability to distinguish friend from foe regarding all creatures. It can see as enemies. Additionally, a protective gale surrounding the creature granting them resistance to bludging, piercing, and splashing damage. Ah. Huh. Well, you know, hold, this weapon sounds pretty cool. It's just so much to the point where I don't think you really need the infusion that I gave your axe anymore, right? I don't even remember what the hammer. Your Hamel.
Starting point is 00:29:42 Infusion was. Axe hamill, tomato, tomato, you know, something. What was that infusion? I don't recall. I think just gave you a plus one to your attack. Yeah. Okay. I mean, if you need that so that you can free that up for another infusion thing, then by all means.
Starting point is 00:29:59 Yeah, because I was working on something over the last couple of days that I actually just wanted to. I want to give Natty. Kissing up to the team leader, huh? Yeah. And also just because I like Natty. Naddy already forgot. She was team leader. Even though it's written at the top of my page.
Starting point is 00:30:16 So I basically whittled this wooden ring out of some, you know, wood that I found over our journeys. And it actually has a special ability that I want to give to you. I love a good ring. It's got a spell refueling ability. So while you wear it, you could recover one expended. spell slot as an action. I like that. So I know you like your spells.
Starting point is 00:30:37 And so this way, you know, if you use one, you can't use any more and you really want another one, you got this ring. Very nice. I'm going to add that to my glove and my inventory. Okay, upon further reading, it looks like I'm repeating myself, but I want to make sure it's clear. The Storm Strike thing can affect my friends as well. So I can knock them prone and put them into a rage.
Starting point is 00:30:58 So I just need to make sure that you guys are clear when I do that. This is an interesting one. It just makes it to where it benefits me to get into the middle of as many people's possible. Strike it. And then hopefully they'll fight each other. Just for clarity, it's Stromstrike. Strom strike, sorry. Oh, good.
Starting point is 00:31:16 I do it all the time. Stromboli. Woo, mama, me. Yeah, it sounds like something I might want to eat. Yeah. New from Spaghetti Warehouse, it's Stromstrike. I was thinking of Fazzolese. No, it's more Nordic, according to Micah.
Starting point is 00:31:30 Strom. You can get protein at home or a protein latte at Tim's. No powders, no blenders, no shakers. Starting at 17 grams per medium latte, Tim's new protein lattes, protein without all the work, at participating restaurants in Canada. This episode is brought to by Tron Aries. For the first time, the captivating world of Tron breaks out of the grid.
Starting point is 00:31:59 Aries, a highly advanced program, journeys into our world on a dangerous mission, marking humankind's first encounter with AI beings. Featuring an electrifying original soundtrack by 9-inch nails. Tron Aries is a must-see movie event, filmed for IMAX and made for the big screen. Experience it only in theaters, October 10. Get tickets now.
Starting point is 00:32:24 Oh, hi, buddy. Who's the best? You are. I wish I could spend all day with you instead. Uh, Dave, you're Huff mute. Hey, happens to the best of us. Enjoy some goldfish cheddar crackers. Goldfish have short memories.
Starting point is 00:32:42 Be like goldfish. Shannon takes a seat on one of the lily pad seats floating there in the living room and just stares at you four. What are you doing here? Why are you here? Water. I am here to make a living, to practice my trade. Why did you abandon our village? There is much to see in the world, and much to show the world as well.
Starting point is 00:33:12 I felt it was my time to do so. But you betray your family. You do not care about our family? I could ask you the same thing, Gunther. Why are you here? I was going to say, didn't you also abandon your family? That's like when you try to tattle on someone's like, I saw Blaine's eyes were open during prayer. It's like your eyes had to be open during prayer too.
Starting point is 00:33:31 That's funny. That's a good one. Yes, I have abandoned my family, but hopefully for the good of the village as a whole. Though I may have abandoned, I have not abandoned the cause. Okay. Your abandonment is worse than my abandonment. I seek to better the world and enlighten it through our practices. So, tomato tomato.
Starting point is 00:33:58 A second tomato tomato reference of the... of the day, Bammer X. Then tell me what do you know of the six-toed swordsmen who stole everything from us? Oh, yes, I heard about this. The Wildershield was stolen from Five Flats. You seek vengeance on the six-toed heathen?
Starting point is 00:34:23 Yes, and to reclaim what is stolen. I see. Well, Gunther, I don't think you're ready to take a vengeance. You need more training. I will connect you with those friends of mine, experts in fighting. They will help train you and prepare you for your vengeance and for recovering the Wildersheel. Yes, I know I'm not ready, but do you know where to go once I am? Do you have any information?
Starting point is 00:34:47 When you are ready, you will be divinely guided to your vengeance. I have begun investigating and will let you know when I have found more information. The thodes I send to help you will seek you out and find you. And if I have more information at the time, they will convey it. I pray you are correct. I'm just going to cut in here and relieve the tension, you who it's me told. Hey, so these thodes are they from your, like, village as well? Did they leave?
Starting point is 00:35:14 Or are these, like, different thodes from a different place? These thodes are from swang sands. Swang sands is the neighboring region to fly flats. Gunto, are you from swang sands? I am not from swang sands, a toads. I have not yet dealt with. We do not interact. Oh, they're like a rival team or something like that?
Starting point is 00:35:34 Not so much rival. We just do not interact. Oh, but why not? They seem friendly. They're going to come and train you. Maybe you could like make peace between your two tribes. Wouldn't that be fun, huh? There is no anger.
Starting point is 00:35:48 We just do not hang out. You're just kind of neighbors that don't really talk or anything. You also said it so menacingly. Yeah. It's like you are angry all the time. His name is Dave We see each other When we take trash out on Tuesdays
Starting point is 00:36:05 But we do not talk We do not talk of the swangshan I think we can all relate to that neighbor That we don't you don't hang out with them You just happen to live next to each other You're like nod When you see them you know walking down the street But it's like I really don't even know that person's name
Starting point is 00:36:20 Are you happy with that Chris Is there more you want to discuss You said you want to share with the world What have you learned? What have you shared Perhaps it is best if I show you. You're going to fight me again? Shannon does not reach for her foil, but instead she does something with her hand, you can't quite see. And the room begins transforming before your very eyes into a cone-shaped room.
Starting point is 00:36:46 With a forge crafted of obsidian iron in the center that begins spewing smoke out, that is an anvil strapped atop a stump and a small reservoir of water. Mossy tools and weapons turn around and become visible, mount. on the walls, and the room has four doors, one at each cardinal direction. This is what I share with the world, my craft. Oh. I seek to restore ancient artifacts. Wait a minute.
Starting point is 00:37:11 I feel like we've had glimpses of ancient artifacts over the course of our journey. Yeah, we broke into a chest full of them. Yeah. Oh, yeah. It's the corn of copia. I've got this shield that might be something. Captain Grubbles has a shield that makes him curse. My gosh.
Starting point is 00:37:31 I thought this was family-friendly. Not in front of my auntie. So then you see essentially a forge and an anvil and various tools for smithing and casting in the room. Could I hold up something for my inventory and show it to her? Sure. I have this pirate hook of Pike Dreams. Do you know what this is? Best I can do is $30.
Starting point is 00:37:55 Not going to lie, I might have just forgotten what it is. What was the thing in the pirate hook? Pirate hook of pipe dreams. I don't remember this item at all. It's a snake-like pirate hook crafted from an unusual green threading. You know what it is, Shannon? Shannon, do you remember what episode that Doug got this from? This is a fine quality item.
Starting point is 00:38:18 The threading is fortuitine crafted from the skin of serpent wine. It's high quality. Hey, is this the antique thode show? That's pretty good. Give yourself an inspiration down. That's really good. Yes. You can use this to hook into nearby creatures and gain efficient of their latest dream or aspiration.
Starting point is 00:38:42 Whoa, that's cool. Could I quickly take it and hook into Toll's arm? Uh, yeah. He will take a little bit of damage. It's cool. I can send. It's fine. All right.
Starting point is 00:38:53 Roll a D6, Doug. Piercing your ear. Oh, my goodness. Three. Okay, yeah. Uh, Toll. Doug runs at you and pierces you for three points of damage. Sorry.
Starting point is 00:39:02 What's your latest dream or aspiration, told? Probably involved, like, Elva and, like, probably a memory of Elva and I in the before times working on Ironclad ship. And then now it's just, like, those bad memories and the bad things we did are kind of being, like, overtaken by, like, the good that, you know, us meeting each other again is bringing. I don't know. It's like a symbolic dream. Yeah, it's weird because from your perspective, Doug, you know, it's all first person. It's like you are Toll, experiencing these things, and you see Elva, and you feel a warmness and a connection to her. That normally Doug doesn't feel that towards Elva, but you're feeling like Toll's feelings and sensations.
Starting point is 00:39:43 So it's really disconcerting and really kind of warming to experience. Don't very tall. We will find Elva soon enough. But then you look down and all of your fingers are pool noodles and you don't know why. Hot dogs. As you unhook the hook from Toll and, you know, kind of regain your bearings, Doug. Shannon looks at you and says, Your friend there could probably tell you more about this item.
Starting point is 00:40:10 And she points at Natty. It was crafted by her kind in the last fourth. So Drowl made this? Yes. Oh, okay. Well, Nanny, I feel like you and I have to have a conversation after about this guy. I love having a chat. Should I give a little hook?
Starting point is 00:40:27 What are you doing? Doug walks over and just like slowly puts the hook Natty puts up the hand and just pushes the hook back He's like Doug you can use your words I'm an open buck if you just want to talk to me you weirdo I picture it's like Natty puts your hand up and Doug keeps trying to put the hook higher To hook into the hand and Natty's hand just keeps going here
Starting point is 00:40:50 Y'all do so much to avoid talking to each other And just sharing your feelings and thoughts Okay well apparently you're All kinds made this hook here, according to Shannon, over here, gone to his hands. Moms? Shannon? I assume we were talking about drows, rollocks? I don't know.
Starting point is 00:41:08 Yes, this was crafted by the drow of the last forest. Know anything about that, Natty? I mean, it looks like something that might have been sold in our market. We have like a big old market on the outside of our village, and that's where we sell all of our goods and stuff to anybody who passes by and any visitors. but I don't know about that one specifically. It just looks like it would belong in that kind of an environment
Starting point is 00:41:32 in that kind of place. Looks like something someone would have at one of their booths. I want to go thrifting at Natty's home. That sounds fun. Oh, it's wonderful. You got like a lot of pirate stuff there? Pirate stuff?
Starting point is 00:41:43 I mean, it's a hook. I mean, pirates sometimes have hooks, but, you know, hooks are for other stuff too. This one is called the pirate hook of pipe dreams. Then I guess yes. You know, we got all kinds of stuff. We sell everything under the sun. All right, well, good to know. Thank you very much.
Starting point is 00:41:58 And I promise not to hook you. Not even when you're asleep. Today. Not even a little bit. Hook. Use your words. We can talk. I have a question for Shudden. Hmm?
Starting point is 00:42:09 Okay, so you say that you've seen so many like mythical, you know, like things and you forges and machines and whatnot. What do you know about thomatex? Hmm? Thomatex are indeed ancient artifacts, probably crafted by the same group of people who crafted most ancient artifacts. Beyond that, I do not know specifically. I have not seen many Thomatex across my forge. What's like your vibe? Like, say, some Thomatech robot man walked into your door. What would you do? Would you greet them like they were your nephew? Or would you be like, ooh, look at you. You're fancy. You're cool. I have respect for ancient craftwork and the
Starting point is 00:42:48 ancient craftspeople. I would treat such technology with reverence. Oh, cool. Look at this. and I pull off my face. Ganta goes, ah! It's scary every time. Yeah, I'm my bad, my bad. I should warn you guys next time. Oh, you're showing everyone now. Yeah, I think Shannon would lean in a little bit.
Starting point is 00:43:05 Like, I do the other thing was like kind of, you know, like an ass, she would grab you by the chin and look you all over. Like, look, you know, like, kind of like she's going to kiss your cheeks, but she's not your eyes. She's not going to actually kiss your cheeks. She's looking at them. Looks close. Oh, yes.
Starting point is 00:43:15 The Zodian Mystics, no doubt. Oh, Zodian mystics. Cool. That's super helpful. Yeah, I mean, I don't, you know, I'm still trying. You know, I'm still trying to find out about my origins. So, like, if you can help me on that quest, that'd be so cool. But, yeah, you know, I'm a thomitech.
Starting point is 00:43:30 Oh, look at me. Feels so good to say it now. I'm just going to tell the world. I'm so proud of you. You know, it's really brave to, you know, speak your truth, Tov. Yeah, I'm doing it. Look at me. Have you encountered any other artifacts crafted by the Zodian mystic?
Starting point is 00:43:44 I mean, if the thomatex. Well, I mean, I have this spyglass of Zodia, if that counts. Yeah, yeah. He sees that and says, Oh, indeed. That is also crafted by the Zodium Mystics. Very fine quality. It is also known as the horoscope.
Starting point is 00:44:00 Oh, that's a clever name. I like that. These are very powerful. The mittens of mushrooms and the stockings of spider silk. Those are thermotech things as well. Sorry, we're just kind of making like show and tell. You're like showing the grown-up, all the stuff you found, all your cool things. Yes, very powerful artifacts indeed.
Starting point is 00:44:20 Auntie, this is your brother's blade. Do you have any skills in which to improve it? For he was slain by that six-toed monster. She takes it from you and inspects it, you know, holds it, examines the balance, and says, It looks like this has already been improved on. If you find more fragments of materials, they can be added, but for now it is as good as it can be.
Starting point is 00:44:45 And she hands it back to you. Thank you. Auntie, take this pebble, eat you. from home. Something to remember it by. She looks at it. Make a perception check, Gunther. Thanks. Okay, yeah, you hand it over to her, and it seems like for a moment
Starting point is 00:45:00 her eyes soften a bit. And then once again, you know, kind of returned to their state they were before. And she says, This is very welcome, Gunther. Thank you. Yes. And FYI, you all also can look around. There are things in the forge if you want to explore further as well.
Starting point is 00:45:16 What was that with that log that bumped my shin earlier? Any significance to that? Oh, that was in the previous room configuration. Oh, okay. So it's gone now. So now you're in like a forge workshop type room. So basically we're in a giant toilet and then that log got flushed and then it's a different way. I like how, was it John, or someone said we don't make toilet humor jokes and we have a literal toilet joke.
Starting point is 00:45:41 Sorry. I think we do. I think he was being sarcastic. No, I think a show that's called Stinky Dragon, whose logo has fart lines coming out of a dragon, is all about the higher art. They know what they signed up for. Yes. I want to see if there's any like Thamatech stuff in there, just to good browse.
Starting point is 00:46:02 Yeah. I guess where would you focus your search? You can look either through the forge, the anvil, there's a reservoir, the tools, there's some weapons. Tell me where you would start, I guess. Weapons. Okay. You wander over. towards the rack of weapons and begin looking.
Starting point is 00:46:19 You see three weapons hanging up, what appears to be a broadheaded axe, a pair of sticks with perpendicular handles attached a third of the way down, and a long and slim dagger with tapering needle point. None of the three appear to be Thamatech, but they do appear to be ancient weapons. A pair of sticks with perpendicular handles.
Starting point is 00:46:39 Like shears or like a, what is that? You look at those a little closer, make me a perceptive. Perception check, we'll call it, Toll. That is a 14. Yeah, it's weird. You've never seen something like this, I guess. It's a pair of sticks with perpendicular handles attached a third of the way down.
Starting point is 00:46:57 And as you begin inspecting them closer, you see it's constantly perspiring with sweat. Shannon sees you admiring them and says, Yes, the tonfa of terrors. When you hit your enemy with it, they scream and are inflicted with fear for one minute. I'm having a hardest time visualizing what you're describing. Oh, it's like. like a nightstick that a cop would carry. Yeah, very similar to that.
Starting point is 00:47:19 Yeah, just trying to figure out the orientation of something with perpendicular handles, but yeah, that tracks. Yeah, like what you would see them spinning around. So what are the significance of these weapons? Are they like for sale, or are they for other clients? These are weapons that have been found, and I have reforged. This is my work I share with the world.
Starting point is 00:47:37 Do you have any weapons or equipment that could help us on our quest, Auntie, please? All weapons can help on a quest. Silly boy. I guess specifically armor. Well, perhaps we can come to an arrangement of some kind and I can trade my skill with these weapons with you. But as for armor, I have nothing.
Starting point is 00:47:56 Medigame, why do you need more armor? Your armor class is already 19. I'm not getting a new sword because it's like his father's sword. Right. I mean, I'm good with weapons. I just got this cool, I don't even remember what it's called. Gaville of Gailstrom. Gaville of Gailstrom.
Starting point is 00:48:12 So anybody else want to look around anything? Man, he's not interested in weapons. I'll look around. I'll go with Doug to look around. Okay, we'll start with Doug and Gunther. So there's two of you. Where do you all want to investigate? Once again, there's the forge, the anvil, the reservoir.
Starting point is 00:48:24 There's tools and there's weapons, which is where Tov is at the moment. I know that Doug would probably want to look at the tools. Yeah. Tools sounds neat. All right, Gunther. Hop on. Let's go look at the tools. And he starts patting onto his shoulder. Yeah, Gutter hops.
Starting point is 00:48:38 Yeah. A beeze. Doug and Gunther, you walk over. over to where the tools are. And you see hammers, tongs, charcoal, rags, wet stones. There's a piece of paper pinned to the wall and just all kinds of stuff laid out. What does the piece of paper say?
Starting point is 00:48:56 You pick up, well, I guess you lean in and take a look at the piece of paper and it's scrawled with the following. Anybody who reads this in seven days will die. Oh, oh God, oh God. It says the end and you begin floating in the air. No, no, no. No, no, no, no. It's scrawled with Speckles 773, soulless, Gager Yaquez, and Mini Hami 11.
Starting point is 00:49:21 Are these old members of our Discord? Eh, maybe. Wait, okay. Things are getting weird in this world. If you want to be on a future note, go over to stinky dragonpod.com. If you want to have your name on a pointless piece of paper. Pointless? How dare you? We got someone in our Discord name, Speckled.
Starting point is 00:49:43 779. Barb just looked them up right now. What were the other names? If I'm being honest, these are probably names directly from Patreon, like Patreon usernames
Starting point is 00:49:53 and sometimes people's Discord names are a little different. Well, shout out to our wonderful Patreon and Discord members, one and the same. Is there anything among these tools that, I don't know, sticks out as unique or special
Starting point is 00:50:04 other than regular, you know? Is there something specific or you're just trying to look for something that's different? Like what is your thought process in this. I mean, this is just like normal blacksmithing and, you know, weapon stuff, right? Or is there anything specific that's like, oh, this is noteworthy? Why don't you roll me an investigation check? He could investigate really good because he's up on my shoulder. Yeah. So he's further away from
Starting point is 00:50:31 the tool, so he's at disadvantage. Yeah, maybe I need to get lower to the ground. It's a four. All right. I drop Gunther back down to the ground. Ouch. Yeah, you're getting old. It's all out of focus. You need to increase. You need to increase. the size on them to be able to see them better. At first glance, everything seems to be just mundane tools. Nothing super special stands out. Auntie, you need to get more cool stuff. Could I take a look?
Starting point is 00:50:55 I mean, I am an artifice. So I feel like I would recognize if, like, anything's out of the ordinary of like a tool kit or anything like that. Why don't you make me an investigation check with advantage? I feel like there's a lot of stuff here that Doug might find relevant and interesting. All right, 14. You know, you're poking around through the various tools that are laid out, and there is something that stands out. There's a good size bag, like a medium-sized bag, that when you open it up, it's filled with marble. Huh.
Starting point is 00:51:23 Well, I know when we had the duel outside, we said it was for all the marbles, but I didn't think it was actually being serious. It seems like they're made from semi-precious stones. Hey, Gunther, I have a gift for you. It's kind of a gift for me. You know how, like, you're always giving us, like, pebbles and stuff like that and different types of rocks. well. I found this and I think you might like it. And Doug hands him the little sack of marbles. Oh, thank you. I did not know that you owned this. Hey, Doug, you know we're in someone else's house.
Starting point is 00:51:54 Find those keyboards and all that stuff. Shannon sees the exchange. It says, oh yes. Those were perhaps created long ago to entertain some long-dead child of the aristocracy. Oh. They'll entertain this kid over here right can't do you oh i'm so fun to play with auntie can i play yes have fun just don't get dirty don't go too far come back before the lights come on okay do you want them back after i'm done or can i keep them those you can't keep oh score what can i have me next me next it's christmas but yeah everything everything else seems to be pretty mundane there i think i mean have we searched every nook and cranny here
Starting point is 00:52:38 Or is there, you know, further reason for us to stick around and look around this person's shop? I want to do something. What do you want to do, Natty? It's just, uh, Natty's going to take Giggy over and show Giggy the reservoir and just see what's going on with the reservoir. You know, when you like take your pets around the house and you just show them stuff that never seen before, it's like, this is the inside of the microwave. You've never seen this. I mean, don't put your pets inside the microwave, but yeah, I see what you're saying. I said show.
Starting point is 00:53:03 You didn't say put inside. The verbiage was very vague there, John. I'm just saying. I don't think it was. I said you show your pets, places they've never seen. The inside of a migraine. Nobody got that out of it except for Blaine. Blaine's the only one who went there, which I'm concerned about that kitten on his death now.
Starting point is 00:53:20 Oh, no. Yeah. You walk, oh, you take Giggy over to the reservoir and take a look at it. And it appears to be a natural reservoir of saltwater, positioned very close to the Forge and Anvil. Hey, Shannon, do you, is salt water better for Forgeon than, like, regular water? I'm curious. That is what is available here. here. It's the natural brine of seawater. It's very useful, one way or another.
Starting point is 00:53:43 Man, even, even your aunt, don't answer questions straight up. Y'all are just, that's pretty clear. It's what's available here. I don't know what else you want. Don't listen to Nadia. She might go his pets. I was just curious if it's better than regular, I assume you guys have access to regular water for like drinking and surviving. I am being told by Micah that in real life, brine water is preferable and used for smithing. Cool. Oh, that's neat. I figured there was something to do with that. Giggy, don't drink it.
Starting point is 00:54:13 Giggy, stop drinking it. Giggy, get your telling out of there. No drinking. Make a roll. Make a roll. 14, giggy stops. Oh, okay. It's like when your dog is drinking your pool water.
Starting point is 00:54:25 So we've got the weapons rack, the forge, the reservoir. There was one other place, right? Are crazy? The anvil. Anvil. I mean, we might as well take a look and finish things up. I'll go over to the anvil. That's an envelope.
Starting point is 00:54:38 Yep. Cool. You walk over and take a look and you see blazing vines streak across the stump from the roots and the anvil's engraved with two symbols. A flower of fire and a three-pronged forked tongue with flame above. Is it warm to the touch? Can I kind of sense since without touching it if it's hot? You try to sense it and it does not feel like it's especially hot at the moment. Can I lift it up?
Starting point is 00:55:04 I want to see if I can lift this heavy, heavy anvil. Oh. make a strength check you've got it remember that time we were at someone's house and told got a hernia
Starting point is 00:55:14 30 20 let's go you know you brace yourself try to get under it and lift it and it lifts ever so slightly off the ground
Starting point is 00:55:24 I mean like we're talking like maybe a centimeter but then you have to quickly put it back down yep that's heavy all right you need a help no I just what are you guys doing
Starting point is 00:55:31 what do you stop stealing stuff stop moving this nice lady stuff around y'all never been The one putting a child in a microwave. What's a microwave? I don't know what that is. It is a small wave.
Starting point is 00:55:46 Listen, John, I like to lift heavy things. When I was in college one time, I saw a smart car and I was like, I bet I could lift the front of that. And I just proceeded to try to let it. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. And that's how Blaine developed a hernia. Yeah. Okay.
Starting point is 00:56:02 Strong as an ox. I mean, I'm good in here. As Toll puts the anvil back down and. rests it on the ground a raven flies up to the window and hits it wham and begins uh cawing at you all private parks walks over to it that's so raven stop i'm gonna take away your get a demotivation die private parts walks over to it and does something with it and turns around to you all and says we have new orders we're to return to
Starting point is 00:56:33 to Fort Endridge for debrief in our next mission. Ooh. B-Team, you're being called to the front line. Oh. The front line? Where did that Raven go? Did private parts microwave it? It's a useful snack for the road.
Starting point is 00:56:49 Well, I guess as team leader, I will say that, yes, we will head to back to our base. Doug salutes Natty. Yes, ma'am. Thank you. Auntie, where are the odds of the swung stands? Swang. Swang. Swank's hands.
Starting point is 00:57:04 Worry not, young Gunther. They will find you. Are they going to, like, you know, spring some sort of a trap and greet us the same way you greeted Gunther? You should be on your guard. Fantastic. They have a very specific set of skills. Should you do maybe like another duel before we go?
Starting point is 00:57:19 No. Let's bet on if we think we're going to make it all there in one piece. Just a quick little bet. Doug wants to swing by Vegas on the way home, on the way back to Ford Ender. Well, you know, even the airport has a couple of slots. Before we go, I want to thank Shannon for the gavel of Gailstrom, and I forgot, Shannon, can you look at my shield? It's one last piece of interesting, you know, ancient technology or something.
Starting point is 00:57:54 Then I'm very confused. It's glowed the other day, and I'm wondering if you could make heads or tails of that. So you hand over the shield for inspection? Yeah. Hmm, yes, I see. This is connected to ThaMetech technologies. Oh. So it makes sense that this is in your possession.
Starting point is 00:58:11 Anything beyond that? She, uh, examines it a little closer. It is Bluetooth compatible. Oh, whoa. She says, When in range of other Thoma technology, it will let you know you are nearby. Oh, that's cool.
Starting point is 00:58:24 Okay, I had a theory about that because it glowed blue when we were near Elva. That's very cool. All right, that's super helpful. So Bluetooth. Yeah. I just found something I remember. remembered I had this brass jeweler's loop.
Starting point is 00:58:36 It says crafted by Dr. Akutarius. Do you know of it? She looks at the loop and says, Perhaps you are touched, young one. It does not say that. Oh, it disappeared. This is just a jewelers loop. Oh.
Starting point is 00:58:50 Remember if we are crazy, we keep seeing things that us of people don't see and that it disappears. Remember the ship that was swimming barred to bar to barred? Yes, I guess, yes. Really good ditty, I got to say. It's not bad. You can find it on Spotify and other music streaming platforms.
Starting point is 00:59:07 I quickly shazammed the music. Then Michael Rising, a quite talented musician. I didn't know you could cast spells to. Yeah. Special barbarian skills. Well, I guess she doesn't know about it. But that'll be something maybe we could dig into, Gantel. Auntie, I hope you are good.
Starting point is 00:59:25 Believe us, go. Yes, I am well, and I will continue to do my work and share my skills with the world. Right, well. Bye and share. Shannon, good to see you. All right, so I guess you all turn around to leave, and then, you know, as you were preparing to depart,
Starting point is 00:59:40 she does say one more thing to you, Gunther. She says, I will send Raven with any new updates about the Wildershield. Thank you, and I shall send Raven just to catch up. Oh, that would be welcome. I'll send Raven with Flat Stanley. It's for my book project.
Starting point is 00:59:55 Mm-hmm. And you can now get almost anything you need for your sunny days delivered with Uber Eats. What do we mean by almost? Well, you can't get a well-groom lawn delivered, but you can get a chicken parmesan delivered. A cabana? That's a no. But a banana? That's a yes. A nice tan. Sorry, nope. But a box fan, happily yes. A day of sunshine? No. A box of fine wines? Yes. Uber Eats can definitely get you that. Get almost, almost anything delivered with Uber Eats. Order now. Alcohol and select markets. Product availability may vary by Regency app for details.
Starting point is 01:00:32 When I found out my friend got a great deal on a wool coat from Winners, I started wondering. Is every fabulous item I see from Winners? Like that woman over there with the designer jeans. Are those from Winners? Ooh, are those beautiful gold earrings? Did she pay full price? Or that leather tote? Or that cashmere sweater?
Starting point is 01:00:51 Or those knee-high boots? That dress, that jacket, those shoes. Is anyone paying full price for anything? Stop wondering. Start winning. Winners. Find Fabulous. less.
Starting point is 01:01:04 Hey, do you like role-playing games? Well, you should check out Mystery Quest. It's an actual play podcast, where we focus on all kinds of indie TTRPGs with a rolling cast of special guests. You can find us anywhere where you get your podcasts. I'll see you there. All right. you all walk outside.
Starting point is 01:01:33 Yeah. Yeah. Sure. So judging by the position of the faint starlight scene in the day sky, it appears to be noon. You know, the Red Sun always stares down on Midras, unmoving. You know, Fort Endridge is about 12 miles away. Metagame-wise, that's two hexes away, about two watches. So team leader, Natty, you choose where to travel next to go back to Fort Endridge.
Starting point is 01:01:55 You can either pass through Solasad or Urbaha High Road, and I will read brief descriptions of both of those to you. You know that in Solis, oh, man, this kind of plays into something we've been talking about already. You know, in Solasad, you can win or lose some serious money on those Verm Mustang races.
Starting point is 01:02:14 A great place to catch some Zs. And your other option is Urbaha High Road. It's a highway that's overcrowded with your classic three Ts, travelers, traders, and tourists. And there's actual tea as well. Well, Doug,
Starting point is 01:02:30 where you want to go? Well, you know, we could put it to a vote, which we may or may not have already done, or our team leader Natty could pick where we want to go. I was asking you in particular, I'm wondering if anything about those descriptions was of interest to you. I've taken some internal thinking and realized that it's not healthy to want to, you know, gamble too much. So maybe it's a good test if we go to Solisad. You have to go. You have to expose yourself to say.
Starting point is 01:03:02 see if, if the demon is out of you. Yeah, just in the last few minutes I read a book on exposure therapy. Okay. And counting cards. You know, it's the Verma-Stang races and I got a feeling for some reason that Tov's kind of a horse girl as well. So let's head to Solisade. Yih-ho! All right. I'm just assuming that if it's a, if it's the kind of place I'm thinking it is, we're going to see a lot of big, beautiful hats. Oh, like the Dobie. You all set out and like I said, Port Endridge is about two watches away, and just a quick recap of the way traveling works. Days are divided into six four-hour watches, three for day, three for night.
Starting point is 01:03:43 So it'll take you about two watches to make the entire trip. As you begin setting out from Chanins on your way back to Andridge Bay through Solasad, thick storm clouds begin moving in. You hear the distant rumble of thunder becomes slowly louder and louder until a thunderstorm is right on top of you. It begins slowly raining and then it proceeds into a pretty heavy downpour. And I'm going to, I'll put a pause there to plug something. We're using a, what Michael calls it, a meat grinder table here for a lot of things that you all run into and things that happen in the world.
Starting point is 01:04:20 It's a mechanic from another role-playing game that he's adapted for us here. And I think we'll talk a bit about that in the second win for this episode. So I think it's a really interesting mechanic that I think you all, as players, have not been aware of, but it affects a lot of the environment and people that you run into and things that are happening to you. So it's called a meat grinder? Yeah. So, for example, it's now raining this thunderstorm that you all are traveling through.
Starting point is 01:04:43 It's because of the meat grinder table, which we'll get into on Second Wind, which is a bonus supplementary podcast available for patrons at all levels who sign up at stinky dragonpod.com. Good stuff. Yeah, a little peek as to how the, how the meat is ground. Okay, so yeah, it's pretty miserable. What's you all marching order here? I'm in front. Behind me is Gunther. Behind Gunther is Doug. And because I can see that there's a storm coming, and I'm assuming there's lightning, I'm asking Tov to, like, walk at least like 10 feet behind us because I think he might be conductive. That is this far enough? Yes, that's good.
Starting point is 01:05:21 Why am I back here so far away from you? You're scatting the rear. Oh, okay. I don't see anything that's a lot of lightning. Yeah, put your arm up in the sky Okay Now what That's that's a That's a technique we use in order to keep the rear of our party safe Oh
Starting point is 01:05:42 Isn't Toll some type of lightning guy Like isn't your barbarian style like a lightning thing? Yeah I mean I have the gavel of Gailstrom And I also have an ability No what's your subclass Barbarian is like a storm herald or something I think There you go Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 01:06:01 Gus, can I control the weather? Can I try to control the weather? Yeah. I think I should try to control the weather. What should Blaine roll to see if he knows how to control the weather, Gus? John, obviously it's a persuasion check. That's what it is. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:06:14 Hey, clouds. That's what Aurora Monroe from the X-Men does all the time. All right, before I do that, I say, Oh, mighty storm, it is me, your leader and God told, and I command you to abide by my commands. I'm working on it. Well, what is your command? Give me a sign that I have control over you.
Starting point is 01:06:38 15 on persuasion. A bolt of lightning streaks down from the sky and strikes very near to you between you and the party. Oh! Look, Natty, did you see this? I heard it. Yeah. Really loud, I have a ringing in my ears,
Starting point is 01:06:56 but I think I'm controlling of the weather. That's nice, Tov. All right, watch this. I'm going to do another one. And then I point at a tree that's next to Natty. You point at the tree and nothing seems to happen. It's just the rain continues to fall. Oh, look, I'm working on it.
Starting point is 01:07:13 He made the rain on the tree. Ah, ha, ha, ha, I'm the Lord of Storms. Doug, I don't know what is going on. When's the last time you ate? You are starving. You could really go for some food You're right And I don't know why
Starting point is 01:07:30 But Natty kind of looks like a giant hot dog All of a sudden What Ganto He kind of looks like a little gummy bell Me next Tov just looks like a I looks like Tov
Starting point is 01:07:43 Tov looks like one of those rollers That the hot dogs sit on at 7-Eleven You can't not picture The Thommatech now So it's like I know you're a robot I can't eat a robot Maybe I haven't like a corn dog
Starting point is 01:07:56 He could eat the skin off of him Yeah, he's just crackling Should we maybe find some food or something? Did you not pack any rations? I might have already eaten those You know how that thing is Where it's like you've got plenty of food in your fridge And plenty of food in your pantry
Starting point is 01:08:13 But it's like you don't want any of that You want like you want something But you're not sure what And it's just not satisfying All right Well, should we look for some grub? Yeah, Gunther has the wanderer feature, which means I can find food and fresh water for myself and up to five other
Starting point is 01:08:31 people each day, provided that the land offers Barry small game water and so forth. I don't know if this land will have that stuff. Well, I think water is not a problem at the moment. Thank you, Tov. Yeah, do you have to roll anything for that or you just find it automatically? Yeah, it's just like a feature. Okay. What kind of things do you, I assume you go out and try to find things.
Starting point is 01:08:51 What kind of things do you want to try to find? What kind of things do you offer to Doug? I'm going to find berries. I want to find maybe a baby a slumgoose. Baby mongoose? No, just a mongoose. Baries and mongoose and roots
Starting point is 01:09:05 and make a mongoose stew. I don't know. It sounds delicious to me. I'm not going to lie. You returned with a little bit of this and that, some various edible plants and berries and small game and offered up to Doug. It sounds like he said that that all sounds good to him, who begins like scarfing it down.
Starting point is 01:09:22 In one bite, by the way. Just because Doug has such a big mouth Yeah, it's like a lot of food for Gunther. He's holding it, but then Doug picks it up and it's like a tiny little morsel. Tolva's doing that thing that you do when you're at a stoplight and then you go now, green, now!
Starting point is 01:09:37 But he's doing it with the lightning and he's pointing at various places going, now. I mean, I am resistant to lightning damage, so it doesn't matter. I'm totally fine. You keep doing it. It's not quite lining up. Every now and then, just before you point or just after you point,
Starting point is 01:09:55 but it's not quite right on the moment. I like your dance that you're doing there, Tov. Yeah. It's fun. It's called the electric boo-glue. You know, as you are progressing, after several hours, you tell me, how are you approaching this?
Starting point is 01:10:11 Are you going to continue all the way to Solisade in one go? Or do you want to stop and take a break along the way? I guess you stop for a little while to for forage and get some food for Doug. But what are your plans here, Natty? How are you going to approach this? Well, you said it only took two, watches, which is about a third of a day, so we could get it there in a day.
Starting point is 01:10:27 Yeah, I mean, it was about midday when you departed Shannon, so you get there by the evening if, you know, you push on. Yeah, we don't stop too many times for potty. Okay. After a while, the thunderstorms die down and the weather becomes more what you're accustomed to here. And the ground begins turning into thick grains of sand. And on the horizon, you start to see what appears to be a cactus-shaped boulder. What? That slowly begins to get bigger and bigger as you approach it. And as you're walking towards it, you realize that this is a cactus-shaped boulder
Starting point is 01:11:00 that's about the size of a castle. Oh, wow. And it appears to be made out of stained glass. Oh. You know this to be the cragptus. Cragtus? There's a bunch of children all climbing to the top of it, competing while cameras film them.
Starting point is 01:11:15 There is not. However, you do see an aqueduct running from the direction of Andridge Bay towards the cragtus, towards what appears to be maybe an underground cavern. And there's a racetrack that surrounds Cractus. So Cractus is a structure made of stained glass. Is it like a art structure, like a statue, or is it a building? It's the size of a castle.
Starting point is 01:11:37 Yeah. Does it have an entrance, windows, dressings? It is all a window. Yeah, it appears to be, you might have to get closer to take a look, but from a distance, it appears to be huge, and appears to be maybe made of some kind of stained glass. You could maybe try to find locals to talk to or get closer to investigate it more. But we are, we're at this practice, but it's like, is it close?
Starting point is 01:12:02 Are we like next to Solisad? This is like in Solisad. This is Solisad. Solisad. Oh. Okay. Happens and Solisod stays in Solisad. Nettie would look for a local and want to ask about this interesting structure.
Starting point is 01:12:16 Yeah, you look around and you see a blue. booth with a sign that reads, place bets here, no magic. And next to it is a wooden corral of worn-looking horses. Okay, I'll go to that counter. You walk over to it and you see the booth with someone standing behind the booth duct taped together. It appears to be an older plump human with bristly gray hair, and he's wearing green furline hoopland. Upland.
Starting point is 01:12:42 Yeah, you guys tell me what that is. It's a loose, voluminous outer garment, popular in Europe during the late Middle Age. It's like one of those kind of poofy tunics, you see, like, at rentiers. Okay. Howdy, sir? My name is Natty. I am a traveler, and I am quite curious about your wonderful city, especially this little stained glass thing you got up here.
Starting point is 01:13:04 What's going on with that thing? Oh, yes, the Craggis. It is a very popular local land bar. You can ride a lift up to the top, if you like. Oh, it's like an attraction. I didn't catch your name. What's your name? I'm Iris.
Starting point is 01:13:21 He sticks out a hand to shake yours. And you are? Like I said, I'm Natty. Natty Wonder and Natty Shakes it a lot. Natty Wonder. A pleasure to meet you. Not a single person will get this reference, but. Hey, Iris, do you happen to know someone named Pepe?
Starting point is 01:13:38 Is this an Akitar thing? I don't get it. Love Island. Oh, okay. I'll get that if you want. I'm sure tons of people who are listening will get it. I feel like that's everywhere. right now. It's so popular.
Starting point is 01:13:50 Well, Iris, it is a delight to meet you. Is this your business establishment of this booth? Are you, like, taking bets for the Vermistang races? Oh, yes. Yes. Verma-Stang races go on here every day. You're welcome to place a bet on any of the Verma-Stang over here. And he points in the direction of the corral where the vermistangs are. What does a firm-mastang look like, Gustavo? Is it like a rat the size of a horse?
Starting point is 01:14:17 They're kind of like worm horses It's like they're kind of in a horse shape With no hooves and worm skin And they've got colored mane of hair Wait, what? Wait, take that back So move over Orox So wait
Starting point is 01:14:33 It is the shape of a horse No hooves Skin of a worm Yeah, it's a worm horse Okay And they have a colored mane of hair So like little worm legs? Yeah
Starting point is 01:14:46 I like to imagine Imagine that this is of drawing someone did in Pictionary where they were trying to draw a horse but they forgot what a horse looked like. This is me drawing a horse in some jackbox game. We have, this is just for our patrons. We have a stinky art section in the Discord.
Starting point is 01:15:04 I need people based off just that description. I don't want you Googling nothing. If this is a real thing from D&D, I just want you to draw what a Verma staying is. And we'll get a consensus on it. Just for your reference, It is a made-up thing. Okay, there you go.
Starting point is 01:15:18 I figure. Well, Iris, that is quite a unique creature you have there. Do those things, are those things that race? Do jockeys get on them? Oh, yes. In fact, one of my nephews is one of the jockeys. Sheldon. Sheldon, the Vermistaying jockey?
Starting point is 01:15:35 Yes, Sheldon is writing whoever hires him to ride at the time. And you said this agro-crag here, I don't remember what was called, Cractus. Craggis. It's very popular. Surely, you know about the cragdus. Everyone comes to Solasad for the races and for the cragastus. Well, I've never witnessed either of those things. And so I think me and my party would love to experience both. Does the cracktis require any sort of admission? It costs one gold to ride the lift to the top.
Starting point is 01:16:11 Oh, sorry, Natty can't make it in. I think actually, I think Giggy ate a gold piece at one point, so... You can wait eight to 12 hours for your gold piece. Well, do you guys, do you guys want to go up to the top of the crackest? Can you afford to go to the top of the crack? You need to get off my butt about affording this thing. I'm sure one of my nicer party members might loan me a gold piece. You know I'm going to do it.
Starting point is 01:16:39 I'm going to pay your way in. I just need this is a lesson you need to learn about betting. I can get us all more gold. Just give me a few minutes in here. I think you're talking about the virtues of betting to the wrong party member there, Tov. Well, if you want to get to the top of the cragast, the lift is in that direction. And he points over closer towards the crackus. And we can get a ticket over there?
Starting point is 01:17:03 Yes, there's a cactus right over there with a coin slot that you will pay to activate the lift. Well, isn't that cute? Because we're in a desert and you guys all got this cactus like little things. name going here. I love that. And this is where we paste the bets. Is that correct? Oh, yes. This is where you bet on the Verma-Stangs right here with good old iris. Which are the vermistangs, do you think is hot today?
Starting point is 01:17:27 You can take a look for yourself. And you points over to the crowd. Let me take a good look at these guys. Who we got? What are the names? How many of our patrons did we use to name these worm horses? They're like, oh man, I could be the next Smarsh, I could be the next Lynn Murr, and then they're a worm horse. That's going to get turned into worm glue after the race.
Starting point is 01:17:53 Doug, you walk over there? Yeah. Yeah, can I go too? Yeah, Doug and Gunther, the pair for this episode. Dween team. Yes. Yeah, we both strike a pose, but Gunther's on top of duck's shoulder. Team Gug.
Starting point is 01:18:06 You walk over to the corral, and there are four mounts there, each is in a stall with a name plaque. And the four names read, El Angel, Popping Fresh, Terry, and Wester. Which one, which one you getting a good vibe from? Read it to me one more time. El Angel, like El Angel, Pop and Fresh, Terry, and Wester. I know who I'm going to put my money down on. Yeah, Terry. Yeah, $5 on Terry.
Starting point is 01:18:34 Terry's going to take it. Something about Popping Fresh was speaking to me personally. Got to go what you get. If you want, you can make an animal handle. check to see if you can get any more information about these beasts and their their behavior or anything about them. Yeah, I'll do that as well.
Starting point is 01:18:51 Yeah. All right. That's a one 16. Which one of these horses bites Tov in the hand? Cunder Terry. 14. All right, so we've got a 16 for Gunther, a 14 for Doug, and a one for Toll.
Starting point is 01:19:09 Seemingly, Tov walks up to Terry and out of nowhere, a bolt of lightning streaks down from the sky striking terry killing and terry fell into the ground dead no no i'm i'm kidding i'm kidding i'm kidding we'll go with gunther first because he rolled a 16th which one did you walk up to gunther it's an angel yeah this vermastang has a golden mane these things have hair yeah okay what do you want to know about this vermastang like you want to know about its behavior or like an asset of it's pick one yeah does it seem like healthy are you gonna say happy yeah you try to ascertain whether it's healthy or not and it seems to be in good health and however you
Starting point is 01:19:56 it looks like it is hungry it's it's wandering around looking for anything to eat and it's like sniffing all over uh the sand and all around stall just looking trying to find these stuff to eat i know what they eat dirt steroids Vermistain growth hormone. Make a nature check. Two. Great. You've never seen a creature like this.
Starting point is 01:20:19 You're not really entirely sure. But you think probably just about anything. It seems to be really forging for whatever it can find. I'm good at finding food as we have previously established. It's true. How do your nature? Can I help look for food for it? Beries, whatever.
Starting point is 01:20:33 Yeah. Do you have anything you want to give to it or you're trying to find something? I guess I have rations and stuff, but I was thinking, looking, helping it. find what it was looking for, helping it for it. So it's getting what it needs, not just what I get it. Make a survival check. 19. You poke around and you find some discarded, like half-eaten pieces of fruit.
Starting point is 01:20:57 And as you handle them, the vermistang becomes very interested and begins like staring at you intently. Here you go, on hell. Make a dexterity saving throw. 13. Okay, yeah, it like very quickly snatches the fruit out of your hand. You feel like it almost bit your hand when it was taking the fruit out of your hand, but you're able to pull it back out of the way in time.
Starting point is 01:21:16 Oh, this one is feisty. Then next, I think we had Doug with a 14. That's great. Which one do you want to look at? Popp and Fresh, please. Pop and Fresh. Are you more interested in, like, its behavior or, like, its assets? Behavior.
Starting point is 01:21:29 You walk up to Popp and Fresh, and its main is a grape color. And, you know, as you walk up, it seems to not really totally acknowledge you. It seems to be kind of just, like, looking off into the distance and looking around. It's somewhat aloof and disinterested in you and anything else that's in front of it. I see you really focused on the race at hand, are you popping fresh? Yeah, not focused on any distractions. I like that. I like that about you.
Starting point is 01:21:52 Yeah, a very majestic-looking creature. Is it? Is it? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Are there any details of, like, the past records of these races? Perhaps you could talk to Iris about that. Yo, Iwis, are you in close enough? to hear me yell your name.
Starting point is 01:22:11 Yeah, I think we're right next to the booth. Yeah, Iris is a little off by the booth. You all are at the corral right now. You'd probably have to walk back over to talk to him. Okay, could I walk back over and inquire to see any sort of like race records? Yeah, let me deal with Tov real fast, and I'll jump back to you here. Tov, which Vermaestang were you interested in? Terry, come here, Terry, it's me Toll, hello.
Starting point is 01:22:34 And you rolled a one on your animal handling. I mean, some may say that that is a critical fail, but, you know, that's up for interpretation. This Verma Mustang has a ruby-colored mane. Ooh. And it sees you calling and it smiles at you. How cute. Oh.
Starting point is 01:22:52 Revealing a mouth full of razor teeth. Of course these things have razor teeth. Jeez. What a big beautiful smile you have, Terry. Wow. You want some pads? Do you want some scratches behind the ear? Terry's just smiling with razor teeth exposed.
Starting point is 01:23:09 looking straight at you. I think I'm going to go in for a scratch. Come here, Terry. Come to Papa. Let me make another animal handling check. All right. It's another one. Yikes, dude. What happens, Gus? I listen. I have an inspiration die, but I like this. Terry seems unmoving and very stiff as you give him scritch. It's like normally, you know, an animal like leans into it. Not Terry. Terry's just like stiff as a board as, uh, you're screeching. it seemingly unnerved by the metal humanoid. It probably knows. Who's a good Terry? Who's going to win the race? Is it you? Oh, there's the spirit.
Starting point is 01:23:51 All right, let's come back over to Doug approaching Iris. You walk back over to the Bating Boost, Doug, and Iris is there kind of standing around, and he sees you walking up. Oh, Iris. I was wondering if you had any sort of records on past for Mustang races, especially these four guys that you got over there. Oh, yes. And what are you interested in? Specifically, like, who won the last race, that kind of stuff? Yeah. Let me see, let me see.
Starting point is 01:24:18 He goes into the booth, opens up a notepad, look for this. Oh, why, it looks like El Anheel won the previous race. Okay. What about the one before that? The one before that, let's take a look here. The winner of that one was Terry. Oh, okay. And what about the one before that?
Starting point is 01:24:36 The one before that, we have, uh, oh. But Terry again. Oh, Terry was on a hot streak. And just one more, one more question. What was the one before that? The one before that, oh, uh, whoo, Poppin'Fresh. Okay. And maybe just one more, what am I the one before?
Starting point is 01:24:53 Oh, my God. What is this going to? Let's see. Before that was Wester. Okay. Sounds to me, Popping Fresh is due for a win. Oh, is, uh, El Anhell, Terry, Terry. Poppet fresh and Western.
Starting point is 01:25:11 Yes, that's right. Well, I feel pretty good about that. And one more question. Yeah, I thought we were going to keep going on, though. Just one more thing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And was there one guy in particular that came in second place most of those races? Yes, let me take a look.
Starting point is 01:25:28 I'll just have a lot. How long of a history of these wins have you guys prepared before this recording? I'm ready to answer all questions. Second place was Terry, El Anheel, Poppin'Fresh, Wester, and El Anheel. I'm very curious if Barbara's actually using some sort of system here. Yeah. I've never been to the races, but we're off to them. You know, I thought there'd be some methodology, but there's something in this...
Starting point is 01:25:57 There's something in this pattern that is not adding up. Uh-oh. The math's not mathin? You know, if El Hanel... I just call them L. I'm not very good of pronouncing that name. Little angel. L came in first, Terry came in second.
Starting point is 01:26:13 The next one, Terry came in first, L came in second. Third one. Terry came in first, pop and fresh came in second. Next, Pop and Fresh one. Westell came in second. So, you know, like, it's kind of going, they're kind of cycling in a way. Okay. Well. Barb is genuinely trying to figure this out.
Starting point is 01:26:31 I think I'm going to put my money on Terry. Okay, okay. What? Terry's my main man. You can both put on money on him. I put money on Hill. Oh, yeah, yeah, Iris perks up at this. Oh, yes, are we placing some bets now? You can bet as much gold as you want on one mount,
Starting point is 01:26:47 so you can pick one mount if you want, Doug. My good instincts wanted pop and fresh, but my analytical brain thinks Terry. Go with pop and fresh, make it interesting. Okay, I'll put, I'll put five on pop and fresh. Oh, five gold on pop and fresh? And are you going to be writing today, Doug? We can write it?
Starting point is 01:27:07 What? I'm sorry, what? I did not realize that was a factor. Oh, is this your first time here? I'm sorry. I thought you'd bet on the races before, foolish me. Yeah, if you want, you can choose to ride and half the winnings go to you
Starting point is 01:27:23 and half go to whoever places the bet. Okay, this got interesting. Tov has arrived by this point. Can I instead ride Terry? Oh. Ah, yes, you must ride whoever you place your bet on. All four of you make a perception check right now. I bet I would make a good jockey as I am little.
Starting point is 01:27:49 Six. You are a little 16. Five. 13. Okay, I'm going to use that in a second. I just wanted to get it out of the way right now. So will you be betting on Poppin' Fresh or Terry? So you're going to ride Popping Fresh?
Starting point is 01:28:02 Yeah, why not? Okay. They could carry a lot of weight, right? Oh, yes, yes, yes. You'll be fine. Jackie's are not known for being bug bears. What's the age requirement for riders? If you can sit, you can ride.
Starting point is 01:28:17 Okay, I'd like my little angel, Gigi. Actually, do I have to bet to ride or can I just ride? Because I ain't got no money. I'll give you five gold. Okay, you can have whatever I win, okay? Okay, thank you. You went hopping fresh. You want Terry Gunther was looking at.
Starting point is 01:28:33 El on Hell or Western. Okay, Gigi can ride Wester and bet on Western. Five gold on Western and my perfect little son. All right. Make that Giggy roll. Oh, come on, Giggy. That's the 13. That boy's getting on the horse.
Starting point is 01:28:45 Okay. Worm thing of nightmares. I like to think he's doing that thing where he's like reaching up and like making like grabbing motions with his hands like he wants upies. Yeah. All right. So that's five gold on Western and Giggy's riding. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:28:57 All right. Anyone else? I shall do 50 gold upon on hell for he is an angel that shall fly. Oh, okay, 50 gold, and you're riding? Yes, I trust Anheld, and I believe Anil trust me now. That wasn't an answer to Gus's question. Yeah, okay. Okay, what about you, Tov?
Starting point is 01:29:23 Tolv and Terry, double T, tin down on Terry, and yes, I will be riding. Ooh, everyone's riding, well, Gigi's riding for Natty, but everyone's riding, everyone's riding, everyone's betting, good. All right, let's get everything set up and get these races underway. Natty does change Natty's attire through her morphing abilities into a very fancy racing-like dress and a big old white hat. Oh, nice, very appropriate. All right, you all lead your Verma-Stangs out to the starting line. There's little stalls with the gate in front of it,
Starting point is 01:29:57 and Iris is watching it from the side. And with a flurry of magical explosions go off. On your mark, Get set. The gates open and from the top of the Cractus. All of you hear a loud, blood-curdling scream. Nanny looks up at the top of the Cractus. in the next episode of Cails from the Stinky Dragon.
Starting point is 01:30:38 We've got a lot to start the next episode. It's got a race. We've got potentially a murder up on top of Cractus. True. It's going to be packed. But before then, of course, you can also listen to Second Wind where we'll be talking about the meat grinder table and about some of the stuff from this episode
Starting point is 01:30:49 and other things we got going on. Again, you can check that out at stinky dragon pod.com. Hey, this is Micah, the writer, editor, and composer of the show. I just want to let you know that there is a recent episode of Stinky Pop Quiz hosted by my brother, John, who has a special guest, Laura Rothamel, to talk about movies. Laurel is the voice of Cyborg's mom, Crystalena, Chip's wife, Carol, and they talk about why Laurel's mom wouldn't let her see Chicago,
Starting point is 01:31:12 her opinion on the hyenas from the Lion King, and which Amnite Shamelon movie is so bad it's good, actually. Another episode is dropping this week with special guest Jacob Fullerton, the voice of Headless Horseman and other lovely characters. It's exclusively available for little stinkers and above at stinky dragonpod.com. New episodes of Tales from the Stinky Dragon premiere every other Wednesday wherever you stream podcast and on the Stinky Dragon YouTube channel. Want to listen to the show 48 hours early and ad-free?
Starting point is 01:31:37 You can support us by becoming a patron at stinky dragonpod.com or join us as a member on beacon.tv. Both give you early ad-free access and a member-only discord for each platform. Looking for even more sneaky content and community perks, our Patreon offers exclusive bonus shows behind-the-scenes content, access to the sneaky dragon discord, members-only live streams, stinky community events, and a shout-out on the show, just like Kyla Solstice, Wes, Lil Fluff,
Starting point is 01:32:05 1314, Jonathan Healy, Moran Comedina. These patrons directly support the show, get ad-free episodes, access to our patron-only Discord server bonus content like Sick at Wind and Behind the Screen and other sticky perks. In fact, here's a sneak peek from the latest episode of Behind the Screen. In order to keep things loose and you try to keep things as pivotal as possible, which is I think this is an interesting conversation to have because the way the modules are written out, it's like the you're ready now you're not ready for everything the players might do but you're ready for a lot of things the players might do but at the end of each module and then this is a real peek behind the screen here chris might not even know this like the specific end of each session isn't written you have a list of cliffhangers and stingers that are possible like it's like generic cliffhangers and stingers and it's like can any of these be applied to the specific session we're in you've got 10 different options for different styles of cliffhanger And depending on how things have played out in the session, you know, as we're going, as we're nearing, you know, whenever we're going to stop recording time, you and I will typically have a conversation like, oh, which of these can we do?
Starting point is 01:33:13 And how can we use one of these to create a cliffhanger that'll keep, in our case, keep the audience engaged and make them want to come back and find out the answer to what's happening. Once again, that's stinky dragon pod.com. We're incredibly grateful for your support, which makes this show possible. Some of our friends voiced MPCs in this episode and listeners who interacted with us on the Stinky Dragon Discord had NPCs named after them. Private Private Parts voiced by Ben Ernst at Halcyon underscore Ben.
Starting point is 01:33:41 Shannon named after Shannon Logan voiced by Ashley Burns at Ashley Burns from Morning Somewhere and Rooster Teeth. Iris named after Little Sector voiced by Eric Bedour at Eric Badur from Regulation Podcast and 100% Eat. El Anheel named after Angel Kite.
Starting point is 01:33:58 Pop and Fresh. named after Pop and Fresh. Terry, named after Kejja. Wester, named after Andreas Westerman. This week's arrow question was submitted by Lorena Hample, Win Win, Fred Jordan, and Loose Goose. This episode of Tales from the Stinky Dragon was produced by Ben Ernst, written, editing composed by me, Michael Reisinger,
Starting point is 01:34:17 with additional editing work by Catherine Arnold and David Sanya. Tune in next time for another thrilling episode of Tales from the Stinky Dragon. I'm Chris Maris. I play Gunther the fighter. He sees a squirrel on a tree outside. He's very excited about your character. He's got a backup guy. He's Gunther the fighter. Woof, woof. Booger the hype man.
Starting point is 01:34:58 Thank you.

There aren't comments yet for this episode. Click on any sentence in the transcript to leave a comment.