Tales from the Stinky Dragon - C03 - Ep. 35 - From On Hyra - Plunges, Plans, and Passing Gas

Episode Date: January 21, 2026

Brutaliteam starts their break in to Skyblue Falls Prison.Support us directly on Patreon https://www.patreon.com/stinkydragon - get access to ad-free episodes, bonus content like Stinky Dragon Adventures & Second Wind, our patreon-exclusive discord, and more!Check out our new merch at store.stinkydragonpod.com ! Follow us on our socials at https://linktr.ee/TalesFromTheStinkyDragonCast: Gus Sorola, Blaine Gibson, Barbara Dunkelman, Jon Risinger, Chris DemaraisWriter/Editor/Composer: Micah RisingerProducer: Benjamin Ernst Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Previous star adventurers rounded up relics and accumulated armor that traveled via tunnel back to Tio and Neo. They threw back together the two Thalmatex and pieced together their paths. Next, they returned a relic to the Kindlekin and received some resources and rumors before resting. While sojouring to SkyBlue Falls Prison, they saw a strange sighting of birds and even stranger snatching of a stranger into Stone Cold Lake. Bring over a brew and let's buckle up for this bedtime tale.

Hello everyone. Welcome to Tales on the Steady Dragon. I'm your Dungeon Masterier, Gustavo Sorolla, and I'm going to hit our four players with an arrow. When do you run out of arrows? I feel like you have a cheat coat on. We're not super nitty-gritty in Talesman Stinky Dragon with like inventory, so we don't keep track of specific arrows. You know, I don't make you all count your arrows down.

So you're not going to make me count my arrows either. That was the one thing is Kiborg. I always like, Khyborg always ran his mouth. Blaine always runs his mouth. I never once said anything about arrow inventory. And Gus never said anything aback. So I was cool. If you don't look, I'm not going to look.

If the world was ending tomorrow, what would you do today? And that was submitted by Natty Wonder. If the world was ending, I want to be next to you. 15. Beautiful. 12. I don't think I know this song. It's a Lady Gaga song.

Lady Gaga and Bruno Mars, I believe. Yeah. I rolled a 15. Two. Looks like we might have a roll-off between Tollve and Doug. Yes. Okay, more of a Juno-Jupiter friend guy, the fan, myself. No?

No, no. Three. 17. So it's going to be Toll, Doug Gunther, Natty. Oh, so I go. Yeah. Hello, Toll. Hello.

Hello. I'll be right back. I need someone else to talk first. Whatever you do, Micah, don't take that pause out. Whatever you do. Hey. That was the sound of transition. I was like, like, moving the gears.

and just, it's me, it's Blaine Gibson, it's your pal, it's your friend, and today I will be joined by me Tov, the Thumbotech Barbarian, yoo-hoo. Wow, world-ending today, huh? That's sad, that's bad news. Tomorrow? Tomorrow? Great. Okay, I've got time.

That's perfect. A couple things. I need to speed run finding my brothers and sisters. That's important. Secondly, I'm taking, I'm going to carry it around, but I'm going to take off. off of my Bjorn skin and just live my life as a Thumbetech out and proud, not afraid, showing it all, naked. He's drinking.

Yes. But I'm also going to have Bjorn skin because I want to be with Bjorn. So I'm going to be running around, Bjorn skin in hand, naked in my robot, Thumbatek body, saying, do not fear me. Everything is okay. The world is ending. Do not fear me. The world is ending.

Yeah. That always puts me to, it calms me down when someone just yells around. while holding a person's skin, do not fear me. It's not. Bjornskin sounds like a luxury jacket line. Like, you know, you go to pick up some winter clothes and like a nice down jacket. You buy like a Bjornskin down jacket. It's like $300.

We need to sell Bjornskin now. Or IKEA, an IKEA item. That's like, Bjornskin is like your dresser that you got. Did you get a Bjornskin rug? You're going to like the way you look in Bjorn. I guarantee it. I guarantee it. Okay, thanks, Tov.

I think up next we had Doug, if I remember right? Correct. Wow, good job, Gus. Great memory. Got to say. Listen, I'm getting up there in years. It's going to get harder and harder as time goes on. Only we are allowed to make that joke.

When you make jokes about you being old, it's not funny. It makes me sad. But when we can poke fun at you, I love it. Sorry. What do you think, Gus? Campaign's going to be before I croak. No, no. No.

Are you guys going to continue some I think it to take over? No, Gus, stop. We'll have an AI of Gus by that time. We'll have some robot playing you, Gus, I'm sure. You-hoo, it's me, Gus. I always like how we joke about people getting old and stuff like that. We're all aging at the same rate. Yeah.

Just Gus is way ahead of all of us. I am the age that Gus was when he met me, and I grapple with that every day. I'm almost 10 years older than Gus was when I met him for the first. first time. I'm almost as old as my parents were when I got married. Wow. Time, man. When is your daughter and son getting married?

Anyway. Anyway. Hi guys, I'm Barbara Dunkelman, and I play Doug Boone, the artificial bug bear. And if the world was ending tomorrow, I think, uh, Doug, man, talking is tough. Sorry, I was just so rattled by the idea of the world ending tomorrow. I think Doug would try his best to find and make amends with his family. Because, you know, I don't want to, you know, go out of this place without, you know, really passing things up with them. But then, you know, I think Doug's not too afraid of death, especially now knowing Natty and, you know, hearing about death and having some comfort there and also maybe seeing his brother, you know, that also provides some comfort for Doug.

So I think he would just like really enjoy his last day, read his favorite book, listen to his favorite artist Madonna, which you guys all know about, of course, from a previous arrow question. And just let it be. Well, let it be as the Beatles, you know. Okay. Yeah. I feel like it's a, it's very zen of you, Doug, just trying to come to grips with it and accepting it.

Doug's not a really panicky person typically. Yeah. I like that. In our second wind episode, sorry, this is a shameless plug, but we also answer these arrows as ourselves. Yeah. And I'm excited about that one because I'm curious what you guys would do, but we'll have to find out in that episode.

Well, we'll determine who's going to be on that episode of second one at the end of this episode. So it'll be a battle. And if you don't know what that is, you can go to Stingodogogent.com and support us. All tiers of support. Get access to Second Wind, which is our supplementary podcast. It comes out every other week where we talk in depth about the episode. You just listen to. And our lives.

And our lives. Yeah. All right. Thanks, Doug. After that, I believe, was Gunther. Hi, I'm Chris DeMaris. I play Gunther, the male croak folk fighter level six. And if the world was going to it, at first I would pray to the flower and I would say, I would pray and see what they have to say. And then I would write a bird. I hate to use birds, but I would use a bird to send a letter to my family. And then I think I would play leapfrog. One last game.

I enjoyed it much when I was younger. One more game before you croak. Yes. Yes. Did you all call it leapfrog or just leap? Deep. I'm confused. Like people in France, if they call it French kiss or French fry.

Oh. Or just kiss in France? No, we called it leapfrog. Okay, okay, okay. No, no need to get angry. Oh, by the way, unrelated. I like the way Gunther says bird. I would call a bird.

It's like he said something else and someone dugged over that word. It's like early Macintosh like text to speech. It's like myself. Sam. I'll be the one that gets replaced. True.

All right. Thanks, Gunther. That's a, it, it, I think the biggest takeaway I have from yours is that you would finally trust bird and want to work with them. All right. And last and definitely not least, I believe we got Natty.

Hey, everybody. John Reisinger here. I play Natty Wonder, who is a drow, warlock, drag queen mother. And if the world was ending tomorrow, I honestly thinking about it, I think I think I wouldn't live my life any differently than I do every single day. and that every single day, I try. This try is a very important word here. It's carrying a lot of weight.

I try to be kind and caring and thoughtful. I try to be a good mama. I try to, well, you know, I try to bring... Say goodbye and you choke. Try to walk away and you stumble. You guys got to start making more like musical theater references for me so I can play along. I try to say goodbye and you.

Nacho. You don't know that song? I was, that's exactly what I was thinking, Barbara. Macy Gray. It sounds sort of familiar. You guys got to understand. This is not where I live. He's more of a J.C. Pitty Brown fan. I'm trying here.

I don't know who that is. It's nobody. It's, because Macy's. I get it. I get it. It took a second. You're making a joke about something I don't know. You know, it'd be.

I dare. Says John. How dare you blame? Okay. Okay. Okay. musical theater jokes. There you go.

Thank you, Barbara. Just saying those words, makes me real warmer. So, no, I was going to say I try to bring, like, try to make this world a more just and right place. And, you know, I'm sure I might, like,

spend a little extra time with Giggy, you know, since this will be the last time on this plane that I'd be able to play with him. But other than that, you know, give everyone a kiss goodbye, give him a hug, and then look forward to, you know, what comes, next. This is your version of the end of the world, though. I mean, Gigi's going to be too busy

to say goodbye because he's the one that brought it on, right? Oh, it's true. I guess yeah, but I still spend time with him, you know, whatever he's doing, I want to be there. You know, it's like, do you want your parent to be there when you finally hit that home run, you know, on your t-ball team? No. It's like when he... I'm just kidding. So I want to be there when he finally, you know, does his thing. You gave me a lot of anxiety bringing up T-ball. I don't know why. Same.

Same, Gus. Yeah, I was like, oh, no. Were we supposed to answer arrow questions that we all asked ourselves? That's what these are. That was from Natty. Yeah, they're submitted by Natty Wonder. They have been that way for the last four recordings. I guess I didn't hear the username submission.

I was like, oh, someone scored Nattie Wonder and the disc, this, Hey, we should start the episode, guys. What do we do? Stop goofing around, y'all. You know what? Thank you, Blaine. Makes me feel better for what I forget. It's really funny.

After traveling a little longer, in the distance, you see a building rising on the horizon. And you get closer and closer, and it looms larger and larger. And you see it's a prison tower of stacked cells that appears to be in the middle of an icy, Lake. There's a localized cloud that hails over the tower frequently and the watch tower circles the lake and the prison on the railway. The watch tower is on a railway and it's moving

around. That's pretty cool. Sorry. It's a really the imagery of that. It's really dope. Sorry. Like it's like the prison and then the watch tower is going around it? Yes. I love that. It's awesome. The tower is in the center of the frozen lake. The prison is in the middle of the frozen is it. Is it on an island or is it just like on the frozen lake? It appears to be built into the frozenly. Oh. I can't get over that imagery. If I encounter that in a video game, I'd go, whoa.

Well, Gunther, she's were here. How'd you get out so we can get back to you? Yeah, reverse engineer. All four of you make me a perception check. 15. 16. 14. 16.

Wow, those are all really good roles. This is a tight grouping. You're asking Gunther, Natty, you're asking Gunther for information about how he broke out and how he got back in when all four of you at the same time notice a humanoid in the, you know, in the middle of the lake. It appears to be a brawny halfling in a striped red jumpsuit, hopping between sheets of ice floating on the frigid lake. He sees you all turn around and calls out to you four.

Hey, you! Hey, where you going? Come over here. The name's Kandu Cody. As you can see, I'm in a bit of a... And with a splash, the halfling is snatched into the icy lake by blue curved claws without a trace. I have a question, Gus. Yes. Do I have any historical...

from my time at the prison. Yeah, why don't you make me a wisdom check? Like wisdom. 19. Oh, no, good. We are dealing with Gunther here. You do have a little bit of knowledge of this prison, having spent some time here, question mark.

You know that the, well, I guess let me ask it this way. Is there anything specific you're curious about, or do you just want, are you just like more interested in broad information? I guess broad, but specifically, traversing the lake. Mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm. Oh, so like a pattern kind of like, you know,

was it? I was also gonna maybe ask, too, if you, like, if you know the prisoners, if they wore red striped jumpsuits. Oh, yeah, that's good. Because I, yeah, knowing if that was a prisoner

trying to escape or something or someone else. Yeah. Last crusade, that's what I was thinking. What you got for me, guess. Yeah, based on your knowledge and your excellent wisdom role there,

you do know that that is a convict outfit that Kandu Kodi was wearing. And that there is no necessarily no pattern to get across the lake, that it's just random little bits of floating ice, and that the lake is filled with vicious creatures that can strike at any time with no warning in order to grab you and presumably eat you. You know also that the watchtower that's circling on a rail

has a very regular cadence, and that is the only way to access the... That's the only way to access the column that's the actual prison in the middle of the lake. Having been here and seen Kandu Kodi and kind of watching the places we approach, do we know the rate at which, like, one complete rotation, how long that takes? It seems to you, like it's not that long. It's not a huge prison. You know, it's basically just one, that one column in the middle of the lake.

So a complete rotation or complete patrol would take probably, you'd estimate roughly five minutes to get around. And you said the only way to access the prison is through that watchtower. Can you elaborate on what you mean by that? Yeah, that there is a, you know that there is a, how could you phrase it? Like a platform that extends and connects them. And that's how guards move in and out, and that's how supplies move in and out. Interesting.

Wow, dizzying. Yeah, so we would have to hop on to the moving, rotating tower thing. Yes. Because otherwise we're going to have to navigate the ice. And I mean, I'm heavy. I could blast underwater, but I don't know what's underneath there. And Doug, I don't know. Doug's, you know.

I'd probably sink right to the bottom with all my hair getting wet. Natty dives to find Kandu Kodi and help him. Oh, that guy. Nattie goes and goes under the water. Oh, my goodness. Natty, no. Okay. Yeah, before that, Nanny looks around and no one's doing anything and talking and thinking.

We're just going and goes, what's wrong with you people? That's a human being. They're going to your wife. You love this stuff. He's a halfling bean. Before you dive in, I was about to ask for something. You totally can. Before you dive in, I was about to ask everyone,

if everyone could make me a Constitution saving throw, please. Constitution saving throw. That's a bad roll. 12. 5. 13. 8. It's pretty cold here. you know, with all the icy lake

and it appears like there's a cloud that occasionally starts pelting hail down on the prison tower and there's just something about it. It just chills you to the bone and Gunther and Natty, both of you feel it to your core and mid-game-wise you gain one level

of exhaustion from being in the cold weather exposed to the elements. Is there, does Doug see any sort of like, I know he saw a tree, but is there any sort of like bush or other trees or wooded kind of things lying around nearby? That is an excellent question. I would say pretty much no.

It seems like everything has been trimmed back to allow the watchtower to move around with easy access and to kind of keep lines of sight open. Clear, yeah. But there's still that one tree? That was a ways ago. That was before you even saw the tower on the horizon. So there's nothing that we could light on fire, basically.

You can make me a survival check here in a moment, but before that, I want to deal with Natty diving into the water after Can Do Cody. All right, Natty, so you take the plunge, you do the Nasty Challenge? Yeah. All right. You dive into the water and, yeah, it just, it's super cold. It just like chills you to the bone. And you look around, I guess, you know, presumably you open your eyes underwater and try to see what you can see.

And in the distance, well, how far, how far can you see underwater? Opening your eyes under cold water would probably be like, oh. I don't know. How do you determine that? Can your eyeballs freeze? They have liquid in them, right? Got to, yeah. Oh, geez, I don't like thinking about that, Gus. Yeah, Gus. How dare you? How dare you? Imagine having two cold rocks in your skull.

I know Chris is sensitive about eyes. And so he's like, no. Eyes and ears. I'll say in the distance, you see Kandu, Cody, in the grasp of what appears to be some kind of bluish crocodile. It's slender with spindly limbs and long curved claws, and it's got a rather menacing-looking tail. Okay. But I'm underwater? Yeah. Okay. How far is the crap?

Yeah, it's going to be a bit of distance. That's why I was kind of like wondering how far you can actually see underwater. From where you are, I would estimate it's probably roughly 100 feet or so. Well, good news. Wow. That's within my Eldridge Blast range. blast range. Wow, what's the range on that? 120? 120? Wow. Can you do an Elders blast underwater?

Yep. I can do an Elders blast underwater. It's a force damage. It has a verbal component, however. What's somatic? It's like movement. Like moving your hands or your arms. It's like a physical representation. So if you're tied, you can't do somatic.

Oh, okay. Justiculation. Justiculating. That's a great word. So underwater can't say verbal component? Correct. Interesting. Okay. Then what if?

Could I do something while you're underwater real quick? Well, I'm thinking, yes. Yes, well, I'll give you a moment to think. Thank you. Could I light my torch and stick it in the ground by us to keep us warm? Yeah. Yeah, yeah, you light your torch and stick it in the ground. And I'll sit, yeah, that will help a bit.

Okay. For sure. Okay. then I guess I will just like try to start swimming towards him. Okay. You know? Can I go in with Natty because I have the ability to breathe underwater? Sure.

Do you swim or sink? I don't know. Probably light. It says I gain a swimming speed of 30 feet. Could Dunther hop along the ice trying to follow them without going in? Yes. So real fast, I looked up how you calculate swimming speed in D&D. And typically your swimming speed is half of your normal speed while you're swimming.

So that means, Toll, if you being able to swim at 30 is actually really good. It's twice as fast as normal. Gunther, you wanted to try to follow along on the top. Doug, are you going to stay on the shore by your torch? Yeah, I'm just going to stay here and watch the fire. I think I would just cause more problems if I went under there with everybody. So it's you and me, torch. Could be your next guest on Doug on the On the Ons and Twos.

My torch. What do you got to say for yourself? I also would be, I think, providing, like, a lookout. Sure. If anything else would, like, happen. Okay. How are we going to do this? So we're going to go, in my mind, I'm going to kind of go through the order.

There's no initiative, but I'm going to kind of go, Natty Tol, Gunther, Doug. Because that's kind of the way you all said what you were going to do. Acted. Right. Natty, yeah, you start trying to swim, and, you know, it's super cold. So why don't you, first of all, make me a dexterity, saving throw now that you're in the water and trying to move around.

30-20. Not bad? Oh, it's pretty good. You begin moving and making pretty good progress. However, just now that you're in the water, the cold is sapping even more of your strength. And you have another level of exhaustion. Oh, no. Yeah, I thought that might happen.

So would you get disadvantaged on rolls if you have exhaustion? It's not disadvantage. We'll do the cumulative minus one. So in this case, since you're at... two levels of exhaustion, you'd be minus two. So just minus the exhaustion. Okay. Okay.

And you're making progress. I assume you would double move since you're not going to do anything else. So you'd be able to move 30 feet if you double move, question mark? Okay. Okay. Tov, you dive in immediately after Natty, seeing her jump in bravely to try to rescue Kandu Kodi. And you see Nadi struggling a little bit in the cold water,

swimming a little bit ahead of you. And then even further past that, you see this giant kind of crocodile-ish creature with Kandu Kandu Kodi. Cody in its mouth dragging him to the bottom. What do you want to do? Yeah. Well, so my movement speed underwater is 30. So I would be able to catch up to Natty without doing a...

Without a double move, just doing your regular move action. You could catch up to Natty. Oh, and also, you make me a dexterity saving throw as well. I forgot because you jumped in the water. Okay dokey. I have an advantage on that. Because I'm a barbarian. That's a nine.

And 10. And then I'm going to do another one. I'm going to do inspiration die, and I don't want to die here. That's 10. Great. Great. Great. Maybe a 10's okay.

You don't know. Maybe. Let me make a roll first. Famous last words. Maybe. I don't know. It's like talking to a little kid when maybe means no. Maybe.

The cold interferes with the workings of your thomotech body. Maybe like freezing up the liquids and the lubricants that you use. to move around, causing you to take nine points of cold damage. Okay. And additionally, you gain one level of exhaustion. Okay, okay. I was going to take the damage, but the exhaustion, guys? Exhaustion?

Okay, well, once I caught up to Natty, I think I'm going to say, like, underwater, I'm going to be like motioning, do you want to proceed, or would you like me to take you back? Maybe even, like... Describe what those motions would look like for our listeners. I'm going to point to the blue crocodile and then I'll say continue, like nodding my head, yes. You're going to nod? Or should I say, do you want to go back and then like I motion to myself like carry you back? And you're like pointing back to the shore?

Yeah, yeah. And then I say, uh, shoulder shrug, questions. In my opinion, Toll would be really good at charades. So I think anyone would understand what he's doing. Yeah, yeah. Wait, don't I have the ability to talk in her water? That's what I was going to say, you're a robot. Like, you don't use air through vocal cords to talk.

Yeah, I think, hold on, let me check. You probably are like a speaker is what you have inside of your mouth. Durability, you're in case amount of, but gosh. I just imagine his mouth opens and sound comes out. It was one of my favorite kind of throwaway lines in Alien Earth when someone's talking to one of the artificial characters and said, you know, this is an artificial character who's getting used to their body. and they tell this artificial character, like, think of your voice as a speaker.

And it's like, oh, like, that's really cool. Yeah. Did you find anything, Blaine? Not on my end. I think that makes sense to me, though. Okay. I think that was something that Mike and I kind of homeroomeroom together when we're coming up with the Thaumetech thing. In that case, instead of, you know, I know you described what your emotions would look like as you pantomime this,

why don't you say it as if you're underwater? Well, I would have done all of those motions, and then I would say, Translation, do you want to keep going to talk about, or do you want to regroup back in the short? I can help be carried back because you look very tired, very sleepy. Yeah, because how far? Because you moved 30, and I said it was 100, so you got about another 70 feet to go, assuming the crocodile creature doesn't move. Natty would be upset about it, but Natty would understand how speed works and be like,

I ain't going to make this. And so Natty would like motion, like, yeah, let's go up. Okay. Up ease. The blue crocodileian creature hissed was what strangely looks to be a smile, and then dives further down with the depths of the lake with Kandu Kodi. Then because it doesn't matter to me, I would lift Natty up. And it's water and also Tov's very strong.

So I could just do that with a hand. And then I would start walking her back to shore. Yeah. You would probably be able to make it then because... Double speed. That was essentially a double move. Yeah. Yeah.

Okay. So I do that. And then I just want to go through at least one action for everyone here. So Gunther, what would you do? You see them go out and then Tov pick up Natty and start coming back as you're starting to make your way out. Okay. Well, then I guess I would do nothing because I was going to like hop along the ice to like follow. But if they're coming back, I would just run up to the ice and then try and stop and go and then barely stop. What was that sound again? I missed it.

And then Doug, you know, you don't have to think about it like they're back now. But as it's all simultaneously happening, what would you have been doing in that moment? I'm just rubbing my hands and putting it out on the fire and rubbing my hands again and put it on the fire, making sure it stays nice and warm for everyone when they come back so they could, you know, defrost a little bit. Also, I have my arms open, ready to give a nice big Doug bear hug. And maybe a towel. Where did you get the towel from? I think it's just like maybe my vest, which is really big on me.

Oh, yeah. But you know when like you're a kid and you're getting out of the pool and your parents holding like the towel open for you? So you can just like go right into it. That's what I'm doing with my vest. Can I amend some, a, a thing that I did? Yeah. Just so that Natty feels kind of cool about it, I'll put her on my shields that she can surf.

Oh. Maybe that'll cheer her up, you know. Cool. While I'm like carrying you out in the water. Huh? Natty, how's that sound, huh? John? I'm trying to visualize what you're explaining.

So he's holding his shield basically up above his head, so you're out of the water. And we're outside the water? And you're surfing on the shield. Well, I'm still in the water. I'm just trying to get you up so that you can breathe and you're out of the cold, cold water. Oh, okay.

And I'm just walking with you with my shield above my head. I thought we would be like we'd get up out of the water and be on ice. Oh, mate. I don't care. I don't know. I don't know. You just want to make a joke. That's Gus.

Gus is the... It's you guys. It's whatever you want to do. Oh, okay. Yeah, Natty'd be fine with that. Natty lounge. It's the saddest surfer I've ever seen. I have a blanket in my inventory.

That's what I would use. Sorry, not my best. Natie didn't grow up around surf culture. So Nanny doesn't know what that is, you know. Okay. That makes sense. village probably didn't have that. John grew up around surf culture and refused to participate.

Hmm. I played a TNC surf on my Nintendo entertainment system. Does that count? Surf culture. I didn't know anybody who served growing up in California. It was not a common thing, oddly enough. You know, I lived in Puerto Rico for a little while, and I did a little bit of surfing while I was down there,

a little bit of bus floor. Look at you. A little bit of bank robbing with President. Yes. I must see that happen. Does anyone hear that? Does anyone hear that? No.

Why doesn't everyone make me a dexterity saving throw? Dexterity saving throw. Eight, twelve. Goo. Seven. Why are my rolls so bad? Ten. That's with advantage.

8, 12, 7, 10. So what happens to all of us? Yeah, you all hear like a whistling sound. It's really bizarre. Oh, no. And then without warning, a huge volley of arrows lands all around you. in the area doing 14 points of piercing damage to all of you. Ah.

As you get pelted with just like raining down of arrows, this sharpness. God, I'm getting ruined out here, man. I was just standing here by my fire! They see us, the guards. Is there any reason they would attack us even though we're not from... Yes, they have guards, they attack. Okay, but to know. We shall run...

Yer. Very good, very good, Gunther. Why do all of you make a perception check for me? Okay. Ooh, that's a net 20. 18. 15. 17, yeah.

All the good rolls come out when it doesn't matter. It's just like when we look. It might matter. You all kind of follow, you know, back the trajectory of this volley of arrows. And you see it very clearly comes from the watchtower, which has made its turn around the backside of the prison and is now coming over in your direction, kind of wheeling along. It's easy to know where to look because we have an arrow pointing where to go,

because it's sticking out of our body. It's true. Hey. In the direction that it will come in. Gus, how far is that tower out of curiosity? Might not be able to do this. It's closing in. It's in the middle of the lake from where you are.

It's probably at this point, let's call it, about 200 feet. A good number you just said. Because in my mind, the crocodile is halfway in the lake. at 100 feet, so I just doubled it for 200. These guys are really accurate. Okay. But you're talking about the watchtower, right? Not the prison?

The watchtower, correct. Yes, that is correct. We're dealing with the two towers here. On the watchtower, the watchtower itself, I would assume you said this is the entrance to the prison. So then at the base of the watchtower would be like some sort of door. I would imagine, like, people get in that way to go up the tower to get into the prison, right? You would presume that that would be the case, but you can't see it from where you are because it is kind of far.

That's fine. Well, we either need to get further away from these arrows or we need to skedaddle and get closer to the tower. So we need to decide that right now, I think. And I think we can say last rites about can do Cody later. I have an idea. Is it snowy out here? So, yeah, there's a light snow. Okay.

What do you do guys? Do everyone get under my blanket? and I'll put a little bit of snow on top of the blanket, and then we'll move all together under the blanket towards the watchtower so they won't see us. It'll be camouflaged. I think that's a very good idea, but they already see us right now. Well, when the tower goes around the back,

we'll be able to kind of finagle our disguise, right? I like this idea. Could we maybe retreat to a place in order to dawn this disguise and then make our our sea? secret approach. And yes, if you think that's a good idea, I just don't see anything to retreat behind. Oh, is there what's behind us, Gustavo? Like a tree clearing?

Yeah, it is pretty cleared out, presumably to maintain good line of sight. There is no brush or shrub. In the immediate vicinity, you could move just a further distance away and be out of range, but there is nothing to necessarily hide by. I think we could do Doug's plan if the tower's on its way back around so that the vision breaks. Line of sight. Line of side breaks. Either way, we should continue to move on because even if we move out of the way right now, they're on the other side, they're going to continue to get closer.

So we just need to buggy. Yeah. Just to be clear, the way I described it, the watchtower has now come back around the prison tower and is now in the process of getting closer to you. It's made the part of the round where it's moving towards you. It's going to get closer and then go away. So we have two and a half minutes until it's, it's, it's, it's, broken its line of sight.

You have two and a half minutes until it gets to you. Okay. So they shot at us when they were still on their way towards us? Yes, correct. Yeah, they're coming around and they see it so that we're in their sight. Okay. If you imagine you're at six o'clock on a clock face, they just came through 12. Okay.

And they're going to go through one, two, three, four, five, six, and then seven, eight, all the way back around. Gotcha. We can still do this. Two of our compatriots have shields. Right. Going through you for shield? Yes, it is a.

It's a smaller shield than you. Yeah. Okay. So here's what we'll do. We're going to Spartan this. And it's going to be Gunther and Tov in the front with Shield. I'm going to get in my ring and take Giggy with me. So all that Gunther and Tov got to do is protect them and then Doug behind them.

Doug, you can get just down as low as possible. I'll use my Blanky. Yep, that'll do something. It protects him from the monsters at night. It will protect him now. Yeah, yeah. Exactly, I'll push no on it. They won't be able to see me.

And. As the rules of the blankie is. We just need to retreat. Yeah. Yeah. No, I think we need to approach. Go closer. I think you're wrong.

I think we need to retreat and we need to regroup and come up with a plan. I need to hear that from Toll then. You should have talked about this before rushing in. I'm just saying, but I think we need to retreat. We need to collect ourselves. And then we need to come up with a plan, maybe like derailing the train or whatever. But either way, it's getting closer. Let's move.

Okay. Never mind. Yeah. Everybody? Yes. I thought we should go closer because being under the tower, they won't be able to see us very well. Split the party? Nope.

Do you come with me? We'll go back. We'll retreat. We'll retreat. I love you guys. Okay, so the point is to retreat again, thinking about a clock face, like down south below the 6 o'clock or in a different direction. I guess maybe we go 5 o'clock so that we're moving further away from them. Is it going counterclockwise or clockwise?

Clockwise. Then we would need to move like seven o'clock. Seven o'clock, yeah. Either way, yeah, we just need to jet away from the tracks. Yeah. Okay. Yeah, you all turn around and try to put some distance between yourselves and the watchtower.

And as you begin moving, another volley of arrows hits where you were just standing seconds before, narrowly missing you all. And after that, you don't see any more volley of arrows, and the watch tower continues its movement along its track. You all just move the distance? And then you just wait, right? To just try to stay out of range?

Yeah, and then get under, try and build that blanket with snow cover. Some camouflage. It's a camouflage. Okay. Doug, why don't you make me a stealth check and we'll give you advantage on it? Okay.

Okay, first one was a 19. Second one was a 21. Oh, both great. You deployed the blankie and, you know, presumably some snow falls on it. You all kind of huddled together under it. Ooh, it gets a little warmer. Not quite as bad.

Not quite as brutal as it was outside. And I guess you all wait a couple minutes. Can we take a short rest to recover and also load them into thinking we are gone? I'm done for that because I got shot up real bad. Give them a sense of safety. Yes. A short rest is about an hour. I think that's perfectly wrong.

Should we just wait till night? I mean. Well, what time of day is it right now? Well, I think you said it was six. No. No. Diggin inspiration die. That was really good.

That was really good. You earned that. Nice. This would be, you would consider this time right now where you are middle of the day, roughly. Wait, is there night? The sun doesn't move. Oh. Dang it.

Okay, never mind. Yeah, short rest. Should we hit short rest? Short rest. Get your short rest. That helps us with the exhaustion? Nope. What do you all want to do during the short rest?

My thought was we built that little blank. get cover thing and I'll just get under it to warm up. I have a loose plan. I think we should start, I think we have a pitch meeting where we all share our plans for how we break into this prison. We can't all go really, nilly into this place. It's like, it's a heist, but like a, with a person. And just to be clear about something you said, just to make sure that it's properly understood,

the sun is sitting low on the horizon as you all continue your journey getting closer to Meadow Canyon. Okay. That helps a little. Just for clarification on that. Gunther, your thought is to huddle up under the blanket during the short rest? Yeah, we're letting snow gather. And let, I guess, Tolv tell us what his idea is as well so we could kind of have a good game plan.

Yeah. Yeah. Or anyone else who has an idea. Yeah. And just, you know, I'm glad Gunther mentions that because it is still pretty frigid. You're able to kind of mitigate some of that by staying under the blanket and, you know, gathering your, your, your body. body heat and protecting you, so insulating yourself with the blanket. And my torch.

You're going to have the torch into the blanket? Well, just right outside of it. Okay. So it kind of emanates over to us a little bit. So in a torch right outside the blanket to kind of give you some more. And to highlight where we are. They're out of range. They will know where we are.

Well, I'll blow it out before we start moving. No, maybe don't because they will think we are here. I don't want to leave my torch. sentimental value for this torch. Well, it's coming handy. What if it's dark somewhere? Are we taking our short rest, by the way? Yeah, it seems like it.

Okay. And to answer you earlier, Blaine, you'd do long rest to get rid of exhaustion. Got it. Thank you, John. Ooh, unless... I had this thing called the cube of concoctions. That sounds like I have a shot

at maybe getting some sort of exhaustion lifting thing. Can I try that, Gus? The purpose of that item is you can place it into water and it can turn your water. into random flavored potions. I'd be down for that. Let's give it a go. It's a worst case scenario.

It's a potion that I just hold on to like a bottle up for later. Okay. So you stick the cube of concoction in, I guess, like a water skin. Sure. You pop your cube of concoction into your water

and the water begins bubbling and kind of undergoing some kind of transformation. And when it all settles, your water is now a sickly sweet-smelling potion. It seems somewhat thick. Ooh. Wait, Gus say that again?

Thick. The last word. Thick. With two C's. Thick. Yeah. Exactly. Can a medicine check reveal what it does?

Maybe an Arcana check. Makes more sense. That's a 7. All right, tell me what it does. Go ahead. You want me to help? Reveal yourself. You want me to help?

I would love your help. Please help me. Okay. Natural 20. Whoa. Oh, Nettie. This is both one of your favorite and one of your least favorite potions that you know of. This is a potion of fake death.

Oh. ain't going to help. I mean, Tov, that's fake death. It will put you in a fake state of death, but it will not get rid of your exhaustion. Do you want to get to meet your wife? No.

Oh, okay. It's fake. Yeah. Boo. I was going to give it to you if it's, if so, but, no,

there's a word in front of it that kind of denotes what it does. I thought it was temporary, but, okay, I'll park at this for later. Yeah. But, it's a good, it's a good for a ruse.

Like, like, is that a food? Like, like, A roo? Yeah, you like make a gravy? Yeah, a rue, yeah.

It's good, it's good. A rose. Just fire on all cylinders, everybody. Just, just doling out the yucks every second. No moment wasted. Sorry, Barbara. I'm trying to tell Gus, he's funny. Gus, you're funny.

Thank you. Barbara, go ahead. Sorry, Barbara, please, Barbara. You're fine. Just waiting my turn. Do we know what kind of creatures run this prison? Like, who is in the watchtower? Would Gunther know that?

Oh, that's a great question because that'll help with disguises. That is a great question. You, Gunther, you did roll well. So you remember that there are two types of guards, depending on what the circumstance calls for. One of them is always covered entirely in very thick, big plate armor. So you don't know what's under there. Just a humanoid of some kind, you guess?

Tony Stark. Yeah, it's humanoid style plate armor. The other one, however, does not have as much armor. where you do know that typically the other guard is archers, which are usually human. And presumably they're the ones who let loose those arrows that ruined your time a little earlier. And in addition to that, Gunther, you also, during your time there, you also heard tale of a very cruel warden who runs the prison, but you never ran into them. Cruel, warden, mean. Yes.

Warden mean, very good. Went through taking a, working on taking a level in barbarian, it sounds like. All right, gang. I think I have a plan. All right, lay it on us. Okay. So, Tov would draw on the ground, I guess, assuming that there's, like, dirt or probably snow. Snow.

You would draw with a stick, a circle. It'd be a clock. And then at the top would be a 12, 12, that's me, hello. And then a sunshine up at the top of that, okay? So this is what it looks like. Describe it, describe it, no cheating. Yeah, okay, okay, so right. So there's a clock, right?

And at the 12 point is... Cheating. He's a 12, and then a sunshine above the 12. Yep. And then he would also draw the six, but these are all Roman numerals. And then he would draw a little, like, half circle thing, right? So he would say, okay, so here's the plan. Basically, if we know that the sun is going to be sitting over here,

we approach from the sunny side so that the sun is in the sun. enemy's eyes. Sunny side up. I love those. I love the energy. Shut up. Okay, so we approach from that way with a blanket over our heads with the snow that we've collected, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And every time the train passes every five minutes, we drop down, we let it pass. And they can't really see it's because they're looking into the sun, right? And then we keep going, we keep going. Now, meanwhile, I will take off my Bjorn skin, we'll put it on Gambat, we'll put like a pole on top of Gambat and have him approach from the south, like the sixth side, right? He will be our diversion, and he'll be moving around,

and they'll be firing all of their arrows and looking at him while we slowly sneak our way. And then once we reach the water, I will be underneath because I can breathe indefinitely, and I'll put you guys on like a raft, and I will push and carry you guys as we make our way to the island and we'll just look like a sheet of ice

floating across the river. I love it all. I just want to be clear about geography here just to make sure we're all on the same page for this for your plan here. Yeah, so I was thinking, yeah. The prison itself is a column that sticks out of the center of the lake.

Right. There's no land around the base. Ooh. The watch tower that's on rails is on this outer shore where you all are approaching from. And that's the only way into the prison. That's what Gunther knows.

So theoretically, once you get to the tower, that's where land or frozen land ends, Gus? Once you get to the watchtower, that is at the very shore of the lake. Correct. And then after that, it is just water and ice. The way you described it, it sounded like the watchtower was on, like an inner ring along with the prison. I just want to be clear. Yeah. The watch tower is on the outer ring of the lake.

And there is no land in the center. it is just the prison spire sticking straight up out of the water. I see. So plan still stands, but maybe we wait on the train tracks, and then we board it as they're being distracted by Gambat, but we do the same approach from going in from the sunny side. Yeah. Yeah, I do.

We do have to, I think, infiltrate the tower, ultimately. I agree, Doug. I have some things I could do to distract him. I have stuff that commit. Oder? Perhaps a stinky fart. Oh, fart, yes, yes. Make it smell nice and eggy to really distract.

Bringing how bad smell could really distract people and make them just lose concentration. Bringing it back to Sunnyside, like Gunther said Gunther, that's your part of the plan. I love eggs. Yes, yes. Eggie. So you're saying once we get in the tower to get... Oh, okay, yeah, so let's do that. Let's do that.

I also, I just want to point out, if I leave Gambot out there, I got to get him back at some point. I don't, you know, he's my guy. Naturally. It also, as a fellow, you know, mechanical being, I care deeply for Gambat, so of course I will advocate for Gambat. I just think he's going to be a great distraction because if he has, you know, Bjorn's skin up above him, they'll be aiming for Bjorn. They won't be aiming for his feet.

Yeah. I think, you know, I think Gambat should hear this plan directly from you, Tov. And I think Doug takes Gambot out and, like, just holds him up to Tov. Yeah. And I think Gambat would have the sweetest little blank, smiley face just staring at you as you tell him he's about to sacrifice himself essentially for us. Oh my God. This is, okay.

Gambot, I'm going to say this in ways that you will understand, okay? Bibi, beep, bo, bo, bo, bo, bo, bo, bo, bo, bo, bo, bo, bo, bo, bo, 0,0, 1,0,0,1, b bbib, bo, bo, bo, bo, bo. Oh, shall be, I got to turn him on. One second. Take an inspiration dive, Barbara. That's really good. That's comedy. Okay, okay.

Got that gambot, and he just bounces his little head up and down. It's a spot. He's in. And then also, I'm just, I have, Toll has some fun little things. He has those spider silk. Stockings of spider silk, which means I can climb sheer walls.

So I could carry someone on my back, you know, while we're trying to go up the tower. I would say probably we should do our best to keep Gunther from being seen just because he's technically wanted. So if we're going to try to protect and hide anyone of us in particular, it should probably be him. I could use my no disguise.

It's very convincing The ears Oh, and yes Nunter Oh, yes Yes, yes And Natty could still go into the ring And then, you know,

just be super easy to carry through Right, Natty? Yeah, I could do that If you want, if you have something better I was gonna say I can fly But I'll get in the ring You know, I'd like a break out from the cold Honestly, it's quite nice in the ring

We could throw you up there like a pokey ball You know And say Natty Wander, I choose you Yeah, I'm down with that. Use Eldridge Blass. It's super effective. Yeah, I'm like a Kangascom with a little baby too. I see more of a chancy, but yeah, it's okay.

So the plan is to go into the tower, the guard tower, not the prison tower. Right. Because the guard tower that's moving around has a platform that connects out over the lake. Okay. And just to be clear, the platform is not always extended. It does extend when necessary. Ah, so we're going to have to deploy that. Gus is just going to keep adding these additives.

Like, they only extend it once a year. So they're not there on the right day. There's a secret code. These are things I mentioned in passing, which now as it's coming out, it's like, these are more important. So I just want to make sure we're clear and on the same page about them. Right. Reminders.

And because you guys were taking a long rest, they had McAfee install a firewall. Which in this time is literally just a wall of fire. Of course. Yes, yes. It will keep us warm. All right, let's execute plan Tov is using Doug's blanket. Yeah, what's the plan called?

What's the code name for the Operation Toll's? It's got to be Operation Vorm Blanky. Okay. Operation Vorm Blanky is a go. V-O-M. Hands in the middle. V-O-R-M. First, correct me if I'm wrong.

I'm just going through the first step here. The first step would be you all are going to, leave Gambot here where you have taken your short rest with the Bjorn skin, and then the rest of you are going to make your way out so the sun is behind, so you're between the sun and the watchtower, correct? Yeah, our backs are to the sun. Okay. And you're leaving the torch here with Gambot,

so their attention is also drawn over here, correct? I think I would probably extinguish the torch and just take it with me. Okay. I know the torch was important to you. That's what I'm trying to make sure I understand all the ins and outs here. It's sentimental value. Her father gave her that torch. Him.

Him. Oh, sorry. Don't just not like the father. What? So, and then the rest of you, under the warm blanket, begin making your way around the lake. So why don't you make me, collectively everyone make a stealth check.

We'll call us a group stealth check. Okay. I think I also... Oh, man. I think I have advantage on stealth because I'm sneaky. That sounds familiar. That's great because I will equal you out with my disadvantage in which I rolled a one. Ooh.

Yeah, I'm, I am proficient in the stealth skill check. But I don't know if that means I have advantage. Oh, no, that's just proficient. 17. Did you roll Natty? Oh, I didn't say what I rolled. I rolled at 15. And is that with the exhaustion?

Everything I'm saying, I'm taking the exhaustion into account. Mine is a 17. I rolled a 10. Let me, I'm going to use my inspiration dice that I just recently acquired. 26. Wow. That's very good. And I want to be clear here, Tolv.

You rolled twice there. Is that because of your exhaustion? Disadvantage. I just have disadvantage because. Oh, right, right. That's right. Okay. Yeah, we got into that whole thing.

I forget. Yeah, why do you have disliked? I think because Mike and guess hate me. This is one of the reasons. It's because of your thomotech. Mechanical. Remember, your cover almost got blown in an early episode because you had disadvantage. I asked you why.

Then Chris started looking through your character sheet. Oh, yeah. You're made of armor. Basically, yeah, as a thomatic, you're made of armor. So you have disadvantaged on it. He just made a metal. Yeah. It ended up not tipping him off enough and knowing we kind of passed over.

I think he got it out. But he's like, oh, you've got Dura build, which means. And I was like, oh, my God. Oh, my God. Yeah. I was like, stop looking at my character sheet. Stop it. And he's like, no, no, no, it's fine.

It's fine. Yeah. Okay, so we had... Oh, is this before you revealed you were a robot? Yes, yes. He almost blew it up. Oh, oh. It was in Andrich Bay somewhere, I think.

It was like a couple episodes before, if I remember right. Anyway. For what it's worth? Didn't notice the thing. Gunther, you had, what, like a 26, 12, a 4, dog of 17, and Natty years was pretty good, right? 15. Collectively, yeah, you all did well enough where we'll say the group,

stealth success, stealth check succeeded. so you make your way around and position yourself appropriately according to Operation War and Blanky and begin working on your timing for the watch tower and how does that work exactly? Do you all have any way to look outside from the blanket

or do you lift it or how do you ascertain when the tower's in certain positions? I imagine like we are lifting it enough so we could see the base of it. Yeah, we're crouched in approaching. I think Gunther is short enough that he could see out. And like from a guard looking down, You're not going to see it lift up.

You wouldn't. I mean, what do they have a kiborg up on their side? They're not that good. Yeah, that makes sense. So you begin timing it and starting to slowly make your way closer to the tower. And just for the movement and just trying to get closer again, I'm just going to make y'all make one more group stealth check. The first one was to get into position.

The second one is to actually get closer and see if you're able to close the distance and get up to the rail to be prepared. 24. 9. 21, 16. Okay. Despite Toll's best efforts, once again, the group stealth check succeeds.

And you're able to position yourself just on the side of the railway as you wait for the watchtower to get close. I'm just going to give my KPC a kiss real quick just to make sure it'll stop you mad at me. Don't turn Operation Warm Blanky into wet blanket. Okay, so you all are positioned how you want to be close to the rail. Are there any final preparations you want to make or any last minute things you want to do?

This is your chance I'm giving you before I say the watch tower comes in close. How tall is it? How tall is the watch tower? If you had to estimate, you would say it's about 30 stories tall. And it's pretty much the same height as the prison. Are there windows or anything that we could like? Wow. Okay.

So we can like not have to climb a sheet. your 30 stories. On the watchtower? Uh-huh. You aren't sure yet. You'll probably know very soon. Okay. And there's the door, presumably.

You assume so. Oh, yeah. Do we see like an entrance as it passes by us? Or it gets closer or other? I'll say at this point you've had enough chance to take a look at that. And yeah, we'll say that there is some kind of entrance. What don't you help me with that, Doug? What does the entrance look like to the watch tower?

Okay. I would say the entrance. looks like kind of like one of those doors with a rounded kind of archway top. But it's a steel door that just has like one of those push things. So it's like no handle, but you just kind of push it open. Okay, like a push bar? Yeah. Okay.

There's your door. Would Natty be in the ring or were you going to be out and about? Nadi's flexible. Maybe wait until we get inside and then Nattie poops open. Because I was going to say I have the spider silk. The stockings of spider silk. I'm so sorry. so I could have like gun throw on my back

and Natty like in my mouth like you know like a knife you know when you're going to the Vata and like an action movie but it would be the ring I was gonna just wear on a finger I was gonna say it's literally a wearable item but wouldn't it be cool if I would

what happens if you accidentally swallow it that would be difficult passing I don't think I want to play that game well you're going to be stuck in there for you know eight to nine hours, you know. Have you guys ever seen the movie, the substance?

Well, I was thinking more like inner space is what it is at that point. You know that's episode of the Magic School Bus, you know, yeah. Yeah. Yeah, something like that. I think I'd rather, I'd rather be worn outside of a open orifice. Too late. Okay, I would wear you on my pinky. Thank you.

Thank you. Doug, how would you... I'm curious how Doug is... I know I could carry Gunther. I don't know if I could carry Doug and Gunther. I don't think you have to carry me. I think... You got it? I'm sneaky.

I'm proficient and stealth. I'm mostly like the moving train how we're like... Doug's a bug bear. And bugs and bears are good at climbing. So I gotta assume... It's a great point. That's logic.

He's like double good. But also, I would think that like when we're at the base area of a tower, they're not going to see us unless they're literally looking out a window straight down. Oh. So I think from line of sight, we're pretty good. Are they distracted by Gambot? Are they spotted Gambot?

I mean, we don't know. Yeah, I'm trying to figure out how you'd be able to tell that. He gets to us and he has like 18 arrows inside of him. I mean, I think Bjorn's skin is going to be in a need of repair. Oh, no, Tov. Why don't you make me a perception check, total? That 20. Yeah, every now and then you feel like you see a volley of arrows

head out to the 6 o'clock position where Gambot is. Yeah, we'll say that's it. The watchtower is approaching. Everyone roll initiative just so I have an order for you guys to act in. You get it. Okay. And I'm in my Noel costume. Okay.

Which is really just skin of, or fur of Doug. And a hat. Okay. Looking gorgeous. I got a four. Nine for Natty. 18. 10.

Okay, so it looks like it's to be Toll with 18, Gunther with 10, Natty with nine, and Doug with four. Oh, sorry, I think I said that backwards. Gunther with 10, Natty with nine. Okay, the watch tower comes careening around on the rail tracks, getting closer to you, Toll, and it's within reach.

What do you want to do? Gunther, are you on my back? Yeah, I guess so, yeah. Okay, so it was Gunther on back and Natty on Pinky Finger. I would wait until the last possible second, whereas like right there, match speed with the train, run up, and then would jump on and then activate my stockings of spider silk to stick on and make sure that I'm like really secure and start making my way to the closest door. And just a reminder for our listeners, there's a pair of Thamotech stockings that's made of spider silk and it's extremely sticky.

And it allows the wearer to adhere to surfaces and grants the ability to. climb sheer surfaces. Don, don, don, don't, don. Oh yeah, it's like the Gloves and Ghost Protocol, right? Yeah, yeah. Chris really liked that. And I'll have my shield out kind of like ready to block and kick her. Okay.

So why don't you make me, you're going to need a check just to like kind of run and jump here. Toll, let's take a look here. What makes sense? Why don't you make me an acrobatics check? Okay, let me kiss my computer real quick. Hold on. That's a six. Didn't like it You need to ask first

Wow, okay Poor Kristen I will get you some new ram If you're so so nice and good to me Okay so you You get Natty on your pinky You got Gunther on your back You really make sure they're secure

And you know you really making sure That Gunther has good grip on your back And as a result You kind of miss the watchtower It gets further away than you expect coming as it gets closer, you realize it's going faster than you thought and you look up at it and it's starting to haul away from you. And you begin sprinting after it trying to catch up to it. But your foot hits a rock that's partially submerged in the snow and you fall to the ground right at the base of the tower.

Unless there's like an inspiration die that somebody wants to give me. Oh, I have one. Sure. Okay. Hang on. Uh-oh. Maybe that didn't happen. What was it?

It was dexterity? Two timelines. Two timelines. Uh, we said. I think I said acrobatics, is what I said. Acrobatics. Here we go. I'm not going to kiss you, but I'm going to give you a nice friendly pat computer.

That's a 22. There you go. You shake it off, Tov. You realize that, that was just the intrusive thoughts and the bad, your lack of self-confidence. And you see that you do actually indeed have plenty of time, and you've timed it perfectly. And you run up to the watchtower as it comes along on the rails.

And you make a jump, and you adhere right to the side of the watch tower. Perfect. That's a good sound effect, Gus. Gunther, I assume you're just, like you said, using your shield to block or be prepared? Yeah, in case it, we'll just have it out in case anything comes our way. He's a long for the ride. All right. And then Natty, what's it like in the ring?

What are you up to? I got a stack of magazines that I like to pull out. And, you know, I kind of thumb through those, do the little quizzes. You know, maybe find a crossword puzzle. Read your horoscope. Read your horoscope. You know. So like the lounge music and a nice fire.

Yeah, there is. It's like one of those, I can't, you guys said the name of what it is, but it's like those like, uh, like old lounges where the, like it goes down a level, a step. Oh, a conversation pit? A pit, yeah, yeah, yeah. And then there's like a little, a little like one of those like column fireplaces in the middle. Um, cozy. Yeah. And Gigi's in there with me. And Captain Grumbles. I probably should have asked this sooner, but it's like private parts with us? No, private parts stayed behind at Fort Andrews. Okay. We are down to just Captain Grumbles, okay, everybody?

You all are, remember you all got promoted, your corporals now, and you've got your own privates, who's got sent ahead. Right. To the front line. Oh, that's right. Okay. That's everyone except for Doug.

Doug, you have just watched Toll runoff and adhere to the side of the watchtower. What's your move? I think I would just keep my blankie over. my head and run towards the door because I think I could see that it's a push and then I'll just have to push it open. All right. You go and run up to the door and give it a push and you, we should have you just to try to

match speed with the tower. You should make a check too. Maybe not acrobatic. I will say that based on my calculation of speed and my speed and everything like that, I would calculate the exact time to take off and the angle to go ahead. I think that's the part you've got down. Why don't we make, let's call it a slide of hand check to see if you're able to give the appropriate amount of force to push open the door as the watchtower is trundling along. Gonna use an inspiration eye, that was a seven.

Slide a hand once again. Okay, a 10. 10. Okay. Yeah, you run up to it and you give it a push and it doesn't open. But then you pull on it and you realize it's actually a pull door. Why would they put a push bar on it if it's a pull door? The amount of times I've seen this and just bad user design and just,

and then you pull it, which is totally counterintuitive. It's the wrong kind of hand. Whatever, you pull it and the door opens and you're able to hop on in. There's even that little metal rectangle. That would indicate a push. It says push. That's how they keep people out. I was going to say that definitely would deter people.

This isn't able to do backsies at this point, so I'm happy to say that I'm quite surprised. that it's not locked. Hey, he told me to describe the door. Santa's how it is a prison. They're the new guy. No backsies, I said it. No backsies. If you think about it, logically,

why would they want to stop anyone from coming in? They want to stop people from going out. Sure. Sure. Yeah. That's exactly it. I'm not going to argue against this. All right.

You hop in and look around and it's a very sparse room that you're in, Doug. There doesn't seem to be much in here. A couple of crates and, you know, it's made out of stone, so some masonry work on the inside

and what appears to be a pulley system of some kind. Hmm, okay. And do I know that like Tolvin, Gunther and everyone are like on the perimeter of this building? Because of the initiative, you would have seen them hop on

right before you acted. So you went pretty much immediately after them and hop into the building. the, uh, into the tower. Okay, I think I'd probably just like hold the door open for them so that they could get in and not be fooled by the push. Oh, it's a pole. Oh my gosh. What are we doing?

What kind of bad design is this? I'll throw Gunther and Natty's ring in and hop in myself. Okay. And Gunther puts, obviously sees the ring flying and grabs it with his tongue and eats it. Ooh, it's an egg. And then Natty appears and is briefly covered in the green frog skin. It's not easy being green. Okay, yeah.

You all... Just the Ant-Man and Thanos effect. Yeah. Tells not the only one who can wear... Yeah, you find yourself inside this, the base of this circular watchtower. Again, it's... The walls are made of stone with mortar. It's very bare in here.

There's a couple of crates and what appear to be, like, ropes hooked up to a pulley system and more or less kind of like the center of the room. Could I see where the pulleys might lead? to from in here or do they seem to kind of go like through something and you can't tell. Yeah, you can absolutely tell. Just for fun, make me a perception check, Doug. 23. One of these days, Gus is going to say, this role can't be for fun, okay?

No fun. This is this, this is for real, these guys. This is it. Yeah. For tragedy. For sadness. Make a role me a 20. It looks like, Doug, you know, you have a very mechanical mind. You have a very analytical thought process.

And it looks to you. So does Tollve. Yeah, true. It looks to you like this holy system is connected to some kind of internal platform that goes up and down through the inner core of this tower. Would I maybe be able to figure out that that was the platform that leads from this watch tower to the prison? You don't think that's the case. It seems like this goes vertically, like to get up. It's how they get their mountain dew up to their...

To get up inside the tower, right? This police system does not extend out horizontally. So this would not be able to get you across the lake, but this will be able to get you to move around inside the tower. Oh, like kind of like a... Yeah. Yeah, dumb waiter. I saw Barbara Panama Miami climbing.

You could climb the ropes, I guess, but there's also a platform as well. Well, uh, guys, I think this might be how we get up to the top. Might alert the guards. Maybe you told you should climb because we are already prepared for that. What you think? Is there a clear way to climb up without using this? Like, are there stairs?

Is there... Like, is it, like, hollow all the way up, or is there, like... So you just want to know, basically, if there's other options, other easy options. To get up, yeah. You don't see any stairs necessarily, but Toll is wearing those stockings of spider silk. So for him, it would be pretty much a non-issue. Okay. Yeah, I mean, you're called, Doug?

I mean, do you feel like you could operate this quietly and stealthily? Because, I mean, I could use these to just climb us up, but I'd... It easily take up Natty and Gunther. Well, is this something that, like, someone could get into and polly themselves up with, or does it have to be controlled from the bottom? You think you could rig it, so you could control it while on the platform. Well, maybe, like, some of us get on the platform and then told maybe you and Gunther and maybe Natty go ahead, and then, like, I'll be right behind you kind of thing.

That's a good idea. I don't want to split us up, but I do want to be close behind it if anything happens. I say we let Natty out of the... It's a very fancy, cozy ring place. And then, yeah, me and Gunther can scout ahead in each floor give you the thumbs up for you to, like, safely approach. And then you can back us up if you hear that we're, like, in a fight or something. Do I see any gears that I could maybe, like, oil up so that they're quieter?

Oh, that's a good question. Yeah, you see some... You had a good perception check. Yeah, you see some here at the base, some gears and the pulley. However, knowing the way, if this system works the way you expect it to work, there's probably a comparable system at the top on the other end too. So anyone at the top would see it moving. I also, this might be a good time to use it. I have a potion of gaseous form.

Because Doug is pretty big and pretty obvious. Use the item. I have two Pokemon's. Then I have a Natty and dog. Is it something that, like, if I take a potion, could I like, break it whenever I wanted to, because it lasts for an hour. Yeah. The way that this spell works is you can end it as a bonus action.

So it lasts for a maximum of one hour or until you end it. And then once you end it as a bonus action, like there's no time left. That's it. The spell's just over. Okay. I think maybe the plan is I take this potion, I turn to gas, I go up. You guys climb and we just avoid this little pulley system altogether. Because I do agree with Gunther, it might alert the guards.

Oh, yeah. I didn't even think about you going ahead. That sounds great, yeah. The problem is I, you know, I'm probably going to stay that way for safety and then reappear if needed. I think you'll know the time. Yeah.

Cool. Let's go team. Doug drinks his potion of Gash's form. So you become a misty cloud for the duration. Your only movement during, while you're in this form, is a movement, is a flying speed of 10 feet. While you're in this form,

you could enter and occupy the space of another creature. You have resistance to non-restealthy. magical damage and you have advantage on strength dexterity and constitution saving throws. I'll send you all this barber so you have it. You can pass through small holes, narrow openings, and even mere cracks, but not liquids. You treat liquids as if they're solid surfaces. You cannot fall and you remain hovering in the air even when stunned or otherwise incapacitated. While in the form of a misty cloud, you cannot talk or manipulate objects and any object you are carrying or holding can't be dropped, used, or otherwise

interactive with. You cannot attack or cast spells. Right. I wonder how Can Doe Cody is doing. I figure if you like smash cut to a crocodile underwater, there's like burps and then like little bubbles come out. Or Candu Cody and the crocodile have fallen in love. Underwater and the start. I like that version better.

Yeah. Okay. So Doug downs the potion and becomes a gaseous cloud and told you are. are carrying everyone up the side of the inside of the watchtower, correct? I put the team on my back, Gustavo. And we've all been there, am I right? And you begin slowly climbing up, emphasis on slow, because Doug could only move.

Doug's flying movement speed is 10 feet. So it's going to take a little while, but, you know, no rush. If this is 30 stories, 300 feet, what is that? Like 30 rounds at 6 seconds around. That's 108, three minutes. Not too bad. It's not bad. Three minutes to climb up to the top.

What if Gunther uses his shield to waft him even faster? And just Gunther and Toll are blowing too. Yeah, but then you run the risk of splitting Doug into two clouds. And then when it reforms, you have two dugs that were half size of the previous dug. Oh, my God. Oh, my gosh. It would be dug and good. How many dogs could we make?

That'd be cool. Oh, my God. That would be fun. All right. Anyway, I'm getting distracted. Too many. Dog and dig. Stop.

When you were in a child. Nailed dog where you named Digg? No, that was just a nickname. People would like to insult me and go ahead and dig a dog. You remember the pets named dog? I start crying and it rains on you guys. When you die, will you be dugged? Nailed it.

Anyway, you all eventually reach the top of the tower. And from where you are on the inside, it just appears to be a wooden ceiling with a hatch in the middle. Well, we're probably going to encounter enemies on the other side of this, so I think I would kind of communicate that to the rest of the team, but I'm still able to climb, so I would just get ready to open the door then. Yeah. I'd be able to fly through there, right? Some gas?

Why about the wind? Presumably, there are, like, even, it's wood, so it's not airtight. A gas would still be able to seep through there. So you would be able to get through just fine. Okay. So just so I'm clear, what's the plan here? Are you going to open the door? Who's opening the door?

Like, what's the order? You could do recon. I could also, yeah, like do a, well, I'd have to break my gashes form to do a distraction, but... You could play a ghost. No. Am I able to talk? No, sorry, I forgot. Okay, I think I would just still seep through to just take a look.

Doug's going to be a ghost, and Tov will do the voice, and he'll change his voice box in his throat to sound like distant echoing. Yes, like this. It's like when you play peek and you become a ghost And you're just like floating around Okay Yeah I would seep through I think to see you It's too late to say it now I just want to throw this out there

It would be fun if Toll could physically remove his voice box And like sneak it up there That way it sounds like it's coming out From that side but Oh literally throw your voice Yeah Yeah

Yeah Yo hoo Yeah Doug you seep through the the floorboard, well, to you is the ceiling, but to the other side is the floorboards. You see through the wooden floor slash ceiling and come out on top, and you find yourself on top of the watch tower. You sure it's not a glass ceiling that I'm breaking? Hey.

And you look around and you can see that there are numerous guards up here. How many do I see? We'll say there are six. Six, and are they the archers or the one in the heavy plate armor? These appear to all be archers. Okay, six. So like six archers and that's all I see. I have thoughts.

If we break anybody out and we're going to try to get away, these guys are going to stop us. So we're going to have to take these guys out eventually. They shot first. They did. Oh, also, I should be clear. Let me give you a little more flavor here, Doug. I felt like I did you a disservice there.

Additionally, on top of the watchtower, you look around and you can see what appeared to be a couple of spotlights that kind of focused light so it helps them see out in the distance. Okay, like that's probably how they saw us and stuff like that to shoot at. Presumably, yeah. And additionally, you also see some kind of mechanism. You're not sure. Make me a intelligence check.

23. You see a mechanism that, again, as an artificer, you're familiar with these kinds of things. You see a mechanism that you assume would be in place to extend some kind of plank from inside the tower up and then down and over to reach out. and it's got what looks to be some kind of counterweight system on it. So you assume that this can, using the counterweets, can reach out quite a long distance and hold a substantial amount of weight on it. So like a bridge essentially from... Yeah, like, but it's not deployed.

It's currently stowed, but you think that you see how it could come out and then over and extend. Okay, so I figured out how to use that when the time comes, we'll say. There are some things I could do with my magical tinkering that could help distract these guys, but... I think ultimately, like, if I just appeared here by myself, they might gang up on me. So I think I'd probably gas back through the floor slash ceiling and then re-dugify myself. Although, there's nothing to hold on to, right?

That's exactly what I was going to ask. Okay. I would just, is there a way for me to, like, tell them how many people there are? So I was thinking about this, Gus. Can I propose something? Uh-huh. Well, they shot at us several times. So we would know how many arrows were shot in one volley, correct?

You could probably get a rough estimate, sure. Yeah, typically when I'm shot at, I count the number of... Yeah, I'm assuming that they have 100% accuracy and all of them land in the area. Sure. They could also see me as a gaseous form, more or less, right? Yes, they can see that you're a misty clown, but it is also snowing and kind of foggy. There's a lot of condensation for people exhaling. So I think in clear weather, you would really stand out, but here you're kind of obscure.

Cool. He could just pop, like, the eye part of his cloud up. Or just, like, nod or, like, shake. Oh, I see what you're getting at. But he's just kind of peeking out under the floorboards. You know, like when you're clipping through a video game. I want to circle back with Chris and make sure he completes his thought here. Yeah, that was just me saying, like, in theory, we could have had a rough estimate of how many guards there are, right?

Make me intelligence, check, Gunther. A, five. You think there's probably about 40 guards. 40 guards on my goodness. A big fight on our hands. Remember there were so many arrows. How about if... And then to circle back real fast to, I think, what Barbara was getting at there.

Yeah, so on the outside, the guards wouldn't be able to see you very well. But inside, you know, once you're in the tower, yeah, you are more visible in here. There's a, you know, a little bit of smoke and dust, but you are discernible. Okay. I think I would float back down to my party and just kind of like bob up and down a bit. and like trying to get them to ask me yes or no questions. Okay. Are there guards upstairs?

Okay. He bobs up and down. He bobs up and down. Heard there are 40. Very excited. Shakes from left to right. There's more than there's 50. Oh my God.

Shakes from west to right. 60? 70, 80? I'm going to. I'm going to. I am going to hold up my fingers and I need you to tell me how many there are. So I hold up one. Two. Stayed still.

Three, four, five, six. Six, Bob's up and down. Sixty guards, my God. Oh, yay. Shanks again, left to right. Oh, only six? Bob's up and down. Oh, this is not so bad.

We can do that. So dumb. So dumb. Okay. I mean, we can execute the plan. We could throw. I see a world where all four of us getting a surprise attack. Yes, I see we toss some over.

and it keeps some so we can put on their armor in disguise. I actually have surprise attack that if I hit a creature that has not taken a turn yet in the current combat, it takes an extra 2D6 damage. It's a surprise attack. It's a surprise attack. Think of a clarifying? Yeah. So we could, we could, you know, quietly climb out.

I could slide Natty's ring out and then don't. Doug can go appear someplace else and then Gunther. You and I could also appear like on the other side. We could just divide it. Hop, hop. Yeah. Hop, hop. I have a plan.

Doug cannot talk. Oh. I can't tell them. So I'm just going to, I'm just going to do it. Yeah, okay. Doug gasses up to upstairs. And then is there a way he could see if like they're all facing away? So like he's behind them?

I'll say this. Make me a, I tell what, this is just Doug's luck. I'm going to, let's home brew this. Roll me a. D20, and if it's 13 or higher, Doug has good luck. Oh, no. I think I know what happens if it's bad luck. That's a big old one.

You come out, and right as you come out and look at them, they're all facing out away from the center of the tower, but then three of them stop and turn their face inwards to kind of huddle and shield themselves from the wind and the cold. So they have all of the different angles covered on the top of the watchtower. All right. Well, after you guys, I think Doug will just hover there. and wait for, I think, everyone to come up through the floor. So this latch thing is it like, I mean, I guess I'm climbing like Spider-Man,

so it doesn't super matter. Maybe I like tap Natty's ring a couple times, creak open the latch and then toss the ring out and then follow quickly. And nothing happens because we never determined that was the cue for getting out of the ring. You have no idea what's going on. You're just hanging out. And for the rest of the fight, Natty doesn't involve herself with it. She is just, just like,

Wait, can you not hear us? J.C. Pinnies? Wow. Actually, yes. One of the specificities of is I can hear everything going on outside. So you can talk to me, actually. Okay. Nati, Fonda, I choose you deploy in five seconds. Open latch, slide ring out, and then I follow. Natty miscounts and deploys right now as like you're throwing in.

Nanny plummetes to the bottom of the tower. And then I open the latch and then let Gunther out, and then I climb out very quickly after. All right, Doug, you see your party breaching the top of the tower. Okay. I think Doug would turn into Doug. Doug re-dugifies. Here. And would take a little rock out of his pocket and imbue it with the most stinky, foul-smelling, disgusting, eggy odor.

Yes. and deploy it right in the center of all the guards. Stinky fart part of the plan. Perfect. Yes. Bosco, I told you to stop eating beans on your shift. Oh.

That's it. I'm going to jump off this. I'm going to eat a butterfinger. The reference from our Discord event. That's such a very narrow reference because of the people that were in that. Chris doesn't even understand. Yeah.

Chris wasn't even there. That's just for the super stink. Yeah. Stinky dragonpod.com. Mm-hmm. You all hop out, and Nadi jumps out from the ring. Doug reforms into a solid mass and tosses a stinky stone. Gunther, I feel like, does like a combat roll out from the hatch, ready to attack,

and Tov jumps out very menacingly. No skin, just pure Thammatech rage. Cool. It seems like you have caught the guards by surprise. And all four of you make me a perception check. Oh my god, seven. 13. Four.

17. Colv and Natty, you notice some unusual snowflakes starting to fall. They're not pure white snow like all the others. There's like little small black specks falling as well, intermingled with the white snow. And as you look closer, you realize it's a swarm of skiders. Flying spiders are descending down on the top of the watchtower, covering all of you and the floor. Is this, what? Is this like a natural occurrence?

Yeah, it's like a swarm of spiders with eight tiny talons and oozing beaks and hairy wings. And why are they here? What the heck? Why? Were these part of the defense system or are they just, is this like a natural, like, was it the fart stone? We'll find out in the next episode of Tales from the Stinky Dragon. Oh. Skiders.

I think the Fartes don't summon them, you know? I think that the Skiders love Fartstone. They're here for the buffet. All right. Thanks for listening, everybody. We'll be back next time. Find out what Skyders are and why they're here. What will become of the guards? And what of Sky Blue Falls Prison?

Find out in the next episode of Tales from the Stinky Dragon. It's the most wonderful time of the year. That's right. Stinkuary is coming up all month long in February. You know, as we call it, Stinkuary. We'll be celebrating all things Stinky Dragon. We've got some fun live streams in the works each week. And we'll be releasing new content,

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We're incredibly grateful for your support, which makes this show possible. Some of our friends voiced NPCs this episode and listeners who interacted with us on the Stinky Dragon Discord had NPCs named after them. Like Can Do Cody, named after Cody Bickford, voiced by Andy Blanchard, voiced by Andy underscore Blanchard. This week's Eric Kush was submitted by Nadi Wonder. This episode of Tales from the Stinging Drangers produced by Ben Ernst and Micah Rysinger, written and composed by Michael Rysinger and edited by Alina Lecorchick. Tune in next time for the thrilling episode of Tales from the Stinky Dragon. So you become a misty cloud.

That's the one was looking for, the actual description. Can I tell you what I imagined? Yeah. Doug farts, but then keeps farting until he farts himself out. That's the weirdest astral projection ever. Yeah. Astral? And as he farts, like Doug's physical body gets smaller and smaller and becomes more and more gas.

It's like like when you let a balloon go and it goes like, but it like becomes the air it's excreting. Mike, I'm very excited about that sound design. I am imagining that I am a cloud that you guys could clearly see that has like my eyeballs and mouth. For some reason, your eyebrows. Yeah, of course, yeah.

You gotta see me emoting. Dumulus nimbly. All right, and that's an animation moment. Everyone go ahead and mark that time code. Mark that, there we go, perfect.