Tales from the Stinky Dragon - C03 - Ep. 49 - Under Oondar Fire - Bask in Reflected Gory

Episode Date: August 5, 2026

Brutaliteam faces off with the Chimirrora in an attempt to reclaim the Wildershield! Support us directly on Patreon https://www.patreon.com/stinkydragon - get access to ad-free episodes, bonus content like Stinky Dragon Adventures & Second Wind, our patreon-exclusive discord, and more! Check out our new merch at store.stinkydragonpod.com - Dice, Player Character Tees, Blankets, Hoodies, and more! Follow us on our socials at https://linktr.ee/TalesFromTheStinkyDragon Cast: Gus Sorola, Blaine Gibson, Barbara Dunkelman, Jon Risinger, Chris Demarais Writer/Editor/Composer: Micah Risinger Producer: Benjamin Ernst Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

When you listen to Nobody listens to Paula Poundstone, the comedy podcast, you learn stuff. I've been learning to throw a boomerang, because this is the kind of thing that really gets the listeners engaged, you know. Interviews with people who will make you smarter. Does the amount that you learn protect you from cognitive decline? Paula, don't know. Can't people just listen to the show? Can't they just enjoy a delightful treehouse full of information? I think I'm bleeding.

Join us and be a nobody. Nice to see you, all you nonaton modrons. Hover into the Stinky Dragon and guzzled our latest gulp, Worms of Engierment. It's a mixture of axiomatic mind tea, pillar of truth, pineapple juice, coconuts and bolts milk, and sprinkled to sugary screws. One mouthful of this mechanical mixer,

and you'll want seven more for your other arms. Oh, eight more. My mistake, I always forget the one in your head. Previously, adventurers had a debrief in discussion with the daring and dapper bun lap, during which they debated deities, dabbled in dinner plans, and developed his dreamy dudes, armored defenses. Next, they footed further into the fantastical

forest forbade some fishy flim flammary in a frame and found an abandoned home of fine art. Doug painted a portal picture that propelled them into a place of plunder, posseys, and a prismatic predator. Naps of nectar and lestell in for a noxious narrative. Hello, everyone, welcome to the tells

to the Stingy Dragon. I'm your Dungeon Master Gustavo Serole and I'm going to hit our four players with an arrow. Your aim's really good. It's good. Spot on. Every time. You've never missed. between the eyes. This episode's arrow question is, hey, let's boost Doug Boone's self-esteem

by all saying one thing that you like most about him. Doug, yeah, that includes you too. You gotta say something. Oh, gosh. That's from I-O. Everyone go and roll me a D-20. 13. 10.

Two. Three. Oh, okay. Almost in order. So it looks like it's going to be Tov Natty Doug Gunther. Tov lead us off. Oh, wow.

Two weeks in a row. Isn't that something? Oh, yeah. Look at that. Oh. Well, Doug Boone, why does it feel like I'm at a funeral right now? What is to be said about Doug Boone? You know what I appreciate about Doug?

Is that despite his crippling anxieties, he still puts his pants on one foot at a time and goes and kills Zundarians like the best of us. And I also have to say, his show, Doug on the ones and twos, phenomenal. Equest three. The editing on that show, that program, Incredible. I would agree.

I would say that's really the cherry on top of the show, for sure. What a great show. Oh, I just love Doug so much. And good hugs. Hug and Doug, that rhymes. There's a reason for that. I do want to say, quick sidebar told, you don't have to wait until someone's dead to say nice things about them.

I don't know why your thought was that you're at a funeral because you're having to say nice things about someone. Tell that to my friends. Blaine here. Tell that to my friends. Blaine, we always say nice things about you. No, stop, stop. Go on.

Find it ironic that Gus is the one giving that advice when if you say something nice about Gus, he shrinks down to the size of a cockroach and skitters away. My internet's dying. You're totally fine to us. Oh, that's a joke. As I was responding, I realized what you were doing at the same time as my response. Perfect. Like, fine. Natty, you're up next, John.

I'll give you a moment to recover. It looks like that may have got you good. I love it. Never change. I'm John, Rysinger, eldest of the sons of the Rysingers. And I play Natty Wonder, who's a drow, warlock drag queen, mother. And also, all-around good friend of Doug, Doug Boone. That's right.

That's right. not to be mistaken from any of the other Dugs that we have met along the way, been so many. And, golly, my favorite thing about Doug is, I don't know how he does it. I don't know how he doesn't run out of whatever does it. But that boy has got quite wonderfully moisturized hair that has a light bounce to it, a sheen that doesn't look oily or wet, but just kind of glistens in the sun. and someday I'm going to get that secret because man it's working

it's working 9 to 5 24 7 well nanny it's actually a formula that I formulated myself would you like to try some? Yeah yeah what's it made from? It's made from great question Hey Doug you didn't have to speak up when I was talking about Doug supering queens

let's talk about it what have we found in this wonderful magical land that has given you this ability to look so fine. It might be patent pending. I don't know if Doug's ready to share secrets like that. Yeah, but it will be available at store.

dot stinky dragon pod.com. It's eggs and oil emulsified. Just any oil. Manase. Any oil you find mayonnaise. Apparently mayonnaise is pretty good for your hair. Get away from me.

Do not, don't. Don't. Don't even think about it. That sounds horrified. Years ago, in the old Roos Teeth days, we filmed the short where I was a miniature version of myself and I had to I was in a jar of mayonnaise so to film that real Gus

had to cover himself in mayonnaise and my hair was luscious for a week I'm telling you. It was incredible. So yeah, I mean, it's disgusting but wow, putting mayonnaise on your hair. You're welcome. You're welcome, Gus.

That was good. The not good thing was finding mayonnaise in every nook and cranny in my head like, like... And probably the smell. Yeah, it was awful. Like there's mayonnaise on me somewhere and I can't find it.

Where is it? Oh, there it is. It's way in my ear canal. Yeah, disgusting. Okay. We're a huge sidebar. Doug, once you bring your product to shelves, make sure we stock that at store to Sinkyragonpod.com.

You got it. It's coming two weeks from now. Two weeks. I swear. Okay. Well, speaking to which, Doug, you're up next anyway. Yeah. I'm Doug Boone, played by Barbara Dunkelman,

the bugbear artificer. And I don't really like speaking about myself very much. Doug's a little shy, but, you know, I will say I'm pretty proud of putting myself out there, even though I'm pretty anxious, like, you know, Tov pointed out, thank you Tov. And just, you know, not as secure in myself as I think some people are, but, you know, I'm really proud of putting myself out there and meeting my teammates here and really bonding with them and, you know, having the courage also to, you know, cook a meal the other day for Bunlap.

and that was really nerve-wracking for me, but I was brave, and so I really admired that in myself. I'm able to step up and be brave and put myself out there. B is for brave. B is for Boone. B is for brave, exactly. That's a big step. Just trying.

Just put yourself out there and give it a shot. You never know. I also do like my hair. It's pretty bouncy. Surprisingly not tangled. Except for the dingleberries. Dude. Okay. Okay.

Why, well, Harry, we know it inside. Come on, guys. Yeah, I got, I got, my body puts hair there where in quantities I don't need it. Let's not talk. Come on, Chris. Come on, Chris. Get over it, Chris. It's a natural bodily function.

Yeah, we all got our webcams on. Come on. Everybody poops. Gunther, you're up next. Hi, I'm Chris DeMere. Soplay, Gunther, the pro-folk fighter. and Boone, Webster's Dictionary defines Boone as a timely benefit, a blessing, and a favor, a benefit, a boon companion. And what can I say about Doug Boone?

Well, lots. I love that Doug Boone is always so selfless and willing to help out others. And Doug is very much a. Boom. I also find that dog's hair is excellent for disguises. It is so good. It works as a beard. It works also as a full body I can do so much.

And Doug is always so willing to give me hair. I have endless amounts of growing constantly. So it's my pleasure, friend. When are we getting the hairless hutch crossover? Yeah. Give you guys an insight into John's manicuring. I cut my own hair and that involves buzzing my sides and my backs. But because of the way that my hair grows in the back of my neck,

it just continues down to my back. I'm a very hairy guy. And so when I'm doing that, I have to just pick a spot where it ends, where I go, okay, that's where the back hair starts, and that's where the buzzing ends.

Oh, no. John, just grow your hair long like me so that, like, you don't even have to distinguish. I did. It sucks to have long, thick hair in Austin, Texas in the summer. Yeah, it's not fun. Sell that area for ad space. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yes. Genuinely, genuinely, you could write in like when I let it grow out, you could just write in. Just stinky dragonpod.com. Yeah. Wasn't there like an online gambling site or a casino that would always like use ads, get ad space on streakers at sporting events? They would have like signs on their back or something.

I think I know what you're talking about. That's pretty good. Yeah, I feel like they haven't seen that in a while. Gus now, it's your turn now. Doug, the things I like about Doug is that no matter what the problem is, Doug, it will step up and try to figure it out. And even if it's something that he's unfamiliar with, like for example, like you mentioned in the last episode, Doug wasn't sure how to, wasn't great confident about his cooking, but gave it a shot and impressed everyone. Wow.

This is the best day, guys. I just got to say, I'm a really big fan of this question and all the answers and it's just, man, I feel just warm. and fuzzy inside. Maybe this should be the whole episode. You guys ready for this? Let's do an anti-roast of Doug for the next hour and a half or so. An inverse roast. Yeah, I was trying to think what's the word, what's the opposite of a roast?

Praise. Cool off. It's like a guest of honor. No, but like that, you know, like we say we like roast them. A chill. Yeah. It's like a lifetime achievement award. Micah suggests raw.

There was, I forget which roast, one of the Comedy Central roast. I forget which one it was. Andy Samburg was on it and his bit during when he was roasting the guest of honor was instead of roasting he said nice things about everyone. I like that. He just went around yeah he would say nice things and be like boom

roasted got him like laughing You're a great friend and a beautiful smile It was all stuff like that like Zing gotcha Which in itself is a good roast because then everyone else who goes around has to roast Andy has to feel bad feel really bad It's true

I thought it was a great bit It was really funny. You all dive into the painting and emerge in what appears to be a vast treasure vault. The floor trickles with gold coins reflecting torchlight. All around the vault are arched caverns filled with mounds of unique gold and treasures, like weapons, furniture, and so on. On the ceiling, you spot a gilded frame painting, and next to it is what you assume to be the chimera, but it looks different.

All the heads and body parts have changed to different beasts, and it stands upside down on the ceiling, roaring down. But not at you, but at a group of Undarian Tauruses, clanging with cowbells and throwing catalanxes at the enraged monstrosity. One Toria spots you all. Boy, that group folks back and he's got friends with him, eh? And slam! Another golden door across the vault swings open and a posse of Goliath Gold Chasers bursts in.

In the name of the golden rod! You should all vacate his vault at once. Gunther, that's when you spotted. Betwixt the three heads of the chimera, lodged into its glass shard scales, is the sacred relics stolen from your village, the Wilder Shield. You look around the treasure vault,

and you hear the sounds of clinking with the floor covered in piles of gold coin, and as you're looking around, taking that in, you hear a growl from what appears to be an angry chimera standing on the ceiling of this room. In addition, there's the floor covered in piles of gold, six arched caverns,

each filled with mounds of unique golden treasures, a golden well in the center of the room, and two water fountains flanking that well. In addition, you see the painting of the great hall, or what you assume is the painting of the great hall because it's turned away with its back facing towards you, suspended on the ceiling near the chimera. Question. Is the golden rod here?

No. Okay. The golden rod is not here, presumably still in the hall you had previously seen him in. However, instead of him, you see Undariantorius's, and Goliath gold chasers. Six of each have entered the room. Torreus to the left of you,

gold chases to the right. Here I am. Stuck in the middle of chimera. Yeah, I guess what's the layout in terms of like, if we're all in this room, are we all on separate corners? Is there one group that's like bunched together versus the other?

Yeah, actually that's a really good question, Barbara. In this room, there are two different exits that you can see. In the southeast corner of the room, there's a gold door, In the southwest corner of the room, there's also a gold door. The Toreus have entered from the gold door in the southwest corner. The gold chasers have entered from the door in the southeast corner,

and you all have appeared in the center of the room near the golden fountain. So we didn't go through any sort of portal. We just kind of apparated into the fight. Yeah. Or I guess the fight hasn't kicked off yet, though, right? Yeah, the standoff. If you remember previously, Blaine, when Tov ran through the painting in the cabin, and he reappeared in the woods really with no, like, seemingly visible exit portal.

Cool. And the chimera you said is on the ceiling? Yeah. That's horrifying. How high is the ceiling? The ceiling is pretty high. I would say it's probably like a 50-foot ceiling. I hope they don't have ranged attacks.

Yeah, the chimera is not attacking. However, it is swinging its tail around menacingly. And I will say the chimera does not look how you remember it looking previously. Oh. Doesn't it have the will be? shoulder shield in it. Somewhere. Like jammed into its like scales or something, I don't remember.

The chimera, its left head now looks like that of a walrus. Its center head is that of a Tasmanian devil. Its right head is that of a, or say its right head and tail is that of a scorpion. And it currently has teradactal wings. Ooh, those are better than the stupid Manta ray wings. The Toreus let fly some catalanxes and throw them in the direction of the chimera. seemingly trying to attack it. Are you talking like escalades or?

Inpo die. Inspone die. Go on, Gus. Go on. Yeah, all right, all right. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, reinforce me.

We need to do the dog thing with Gus. Blaine, you're so smart and funny. That was a really insightful joke. Stop. Shut up. Stop. Is he dying? What's going?

Maybe we'll see how the battle goes. We had technical difficulties in a recording, I don't remember when it was, a couple weeks ago, and Blaine had to leave to restart his computer, and as soon as he left, I started complimenting him. And everyone was like, why do you do that as soon as he leave? That makes me sweaty. So they throw these paddlaxes or whatever? Atle axes. Yeah, at the chimera.

And the chimera turns around and roars at them angrily. Do they do anything to it? Do they, like, bounce off of it? Do they hit it? Let's make a roll and see. Yeah, the catalanxes fly towards the chimera, and it seems like they're gonna hit it, but then every single catalanx that hits it

instead bounces off of its exterior, and the catalanxes ricochet back, and fly back towards the Tauruses, scattering around them, sending the Toreuses, diving towards the ground looking for cover. Oof. Hey, everybody, let's calm it down. We seem to have quite a full room here

with a lot of, like, you know, hot tempers, and ideas? What's the deal? Why are you guys throwing an axe at that creature? The Toriuses, they're at the moment, they're kind of diving away and trying to avoid the reflected weapons so that it's difficult for them to answer.

But you would think that they're trying, obviously they're trying to harm the chimera that's on the ceiling. And one of you asked that I kind of agreed with you in passing. I just want to reinforce it. The Wilder Shield is attached to the chimera. So they want that.

Yeah, that's what you see at the moment. Everyone, since there are a lot of movie pieces, why do we just all roll initiative just to kind of get things in order here? Natty essentially did that thing that, like, the bewildered high school teacher would do when she saw a fight down the hallway. We're like, hey, cut it out. What are you doing down there? I do like the idea of Natty just speaking at normal volume.

Just like, all right, why do we do in here? While she's like, ah. 18. 11. 21. 22. 17 for Natty. And I'm rolling for them.

Do you have advantage on initiative, Chris, for Gunther? No, but he has a really high initiative. Gotcha. It's plus five. Oh, sick. All right, well, with that, Gunther, but I'll act with you as well, Gunther. You could act with me if you want.

Well, I think normally he had been up until now, but seeing the Wilder Shield now, he's working with Gunther. This is kind of their goal. They're both going to move on Gunther's 22. After that is the chimera, then Toll. then Natty, then Doug, then The Torius, then lastly the gold chasers. Gunther, you and Bunlap survey the situation, and there's a lot to take in. What do you all think you're going to do?

This is not a battle I think we win through force. I think it's we win it through getting the shield and running. Hmm, yes, I like them French fried shields. Bunnap, why don't we play Leapfrog? Oh yes, Leap! My favorite game. Okay, so I'm going to pitch this as a thing that me and Bunlap have done in the past, right? Because we can, Crokeful can have like a really high jump.

And I want to pitch our thing where I get on Bunlap. Bunlap does his really high jump. And then I jump off of him to double it. Mecca Shiva. A literal leap, little frog. To try and get to the ceiling. Yeah. What is your goal on the ceiling?

Just fill me in. Like I'm hearing step one. What's step two? Because... Step two would be trying to grab hold the Camara and like so I can try and pick at this shield to get it off. Okay, okay. Yeah, to jump up and grab it.

80s action hero style. Yeah. I will say, I think that in the past, you have talked about like playing leapfrog and doing similar things like this with maybe not necessarily Bunlap, but in the village. I feel like we've talked about this before. So yeah, that's absolutely something you can do. Let's say that, Chris.

Nice. But just to fill in the blanks a little bit and give you a little more context for this maneuver. I mentioned this, I think, the last time you all saw the chimera in the Great Hall, so I just want to remind you of this. The chimera is covered in mirror-like shards, and that's what they, it like turned around and swiped its tail and hit, I think you with it when you all were in the Great Hall.

So like daggers essentially? Blades, yeah, like it's sharp. Imagine like a broken mirror, you know, like you want to be real careful with that. So there's not something I necessarily would want to grab hold. I mean, you could. But there will be side effects of that. So I'm not saying no. I'm just letting you know that there may be some damage

or some other side effect associated with that. All right. Heard. Yeah, I'm going to reread the description of the chimera because of that just to make sure it's clear in your head. So the chimera is a large fusion of three beasts composed of diamond hard, multifaceted glass. Three-headed, two-winged, and one-tailed.

And I just went through what all the different parts are. But yeah, I want to reinforce that. Diamond-hard, multifaceted glass is covering it. I don't want to talk you out of this because I think that super leapfrog power rocks, but do you have a plan for when you fall 50 feet? I assume that with us already having a really high jump on it of itself.

Like, we aren't going to take damage from that fall from that jump. is my thinking. Gus, counterpoint. I feel like he's also a frog. Counterpoint, gravity. Okay. We're going to test this by dropping Chris. Go for it.

Yeah. Let's just do it. I feel like lots of times, it's fun to do the thing and worry about the consequences later. In life, I never do that. So in D&D, it's like, absolutely. Leap first and figure it out

when you're falling. As I'm flying towards it, does it open its mouth to like take a bite at me? or anything like that. Let's figure that out. How do you do your leap ability? Is it just something that you're able to do?

Or how does that work? Yeah, yeah. It's just a croak-folk thing. I'll read it now. Your long jump is up to 25 feet, and your high jump is up to 15 feet without a running start. Okay.

So without a running start, you'd be short, but we'll say if you all do have a little bit of a running start and you're able to do that, I'm not going to bust out the calculator in the Pythagorean theorem at the moment, but we'll say that it's sufficient. to get you up there.

You get onto Bundlap's shoulders and back. Bunlap begins a running start and leaps up into the air as high as he can. And when it seems like he's at the apex of his jump, you jump off as well, leaping into the air towards the chimera. The chimera sees you coming towards it. What would it do?

Squabwe. It wants it. It eats you. Gus is, yeah, goes from, oh yeah, let's do it, encouragement to, Now you're dead. And that's time to roll a new character.

Monther. That's where he comes in. And you're not trying to attack it. You're trying to pull the... Grapple? The Wilder Shield off of it. Yeah. I'm just trying to think of how the chimera would react.

Well, yeah, let's do that first. Yeah, make like an unarmed strike attack to see if you hit it first of all. Do a gun third. That's what eight. Whoa. Okay. Yeah, you got to give it to you then at that point. Since you rolled a critical success, I'll say that you're able to precise.

target the Wilder Shield and your hands don't have to touch any of the mirror shards or anything. You're able to, you know, find your target precisely and wrap your hands around the Wilder Shield. The Chimera would not like the fact that you're attached to it. So I think it would try to shake you off. So, you know, how animals can do that, four-legged animals can do that shake. So in response to that, I want you to make a dexterity saving throw? Mechanical bowl check? Let's call it a dexterity.

charity saving throw to see if you're able to hold on. Okay. Has anybody here ever seen the movie Urban Cowboy with John Travolta, the Texas? No. No. No. The entire movie is based around a mechanical bowl competition and it's bonkers. The mechanical bowl competition?

Yes. Wow. Never thought I'd see the day. 17. 17. Okay. Yeah. You're able to hold on to it.

And in fact, if you want to give it a pull, I'll say you're able to give a little bit of a heft right there. Oh. Okay, so I'm like hefting it. Like, yeah, what would that entail? I also have disarming strike I could try and do. Well, I figured that's, you think that would be. That's like using your weapon.

You would do something like that. Here you're like, you're like barehanded. Just give me a strength check. Okay. No, he's frog handed, Gus. Do you hold. Well, I give him my inspiration die. Okay.

I have one. I was one. No, no, take mine. This is important. We need this. Shield! I also have a flash of genius I could use. Oh.

That might be more. effective. That'd probably be better. Can I have my inspiration about? Yeah. Okay. Flash of Genius so you add plus four to your role. So that's 16.

That's much better. Yeah, I don't know. Maybe you should save that heat metal. How would you use your Flash of Genius? Like, how do you picture that going off? Like in universe, Barbara. Like, what would Doug do in this moment to try to help Gunther pull this out? I think that we would make eye contact because he's up there grabbing it out.

Right. I'm feeling flung. And I, in that moment, I'm upside down. And I think we would make eye contact, and I would just mouth. You can do it. You can figure it out. Oh, the power's inside you. And then Gunther, it's like, they can figure it out.

He also then spits out his tongue to loop, double around the shield. Oh. Yeah. And that seems to free it. and you begin falling down to the ground. Oh, no, I can't figure it out. I guess I hold the shield to kind of like slow the glider. Yeah, like a parachute.

And then Bunlap, as we practice, he jumps and tries to catch me. Yeah, that's exactly what I was going to say is as you're doing that, Bunlap would leap up a second time and catch you halfway up in the air and giving you a strong, solid embrace and you both fall to the ground. Oh, it works. I did not think it would. You all will take a little bit of, not too much, just a little bit of fall damage, not nearly as much as he normally would have taken

for something like that. We'll give it, we'll call it. Three points of fall damage. All right, Gunther, well done. You've got it. And the chimera seems happy to have you off of, out of its space, and no longer bothering it.

And once again, seems to be turning its attention and its focus more on the Undarians, who are still scattering for cover. Can I try and put the shield, like, hide it so that the other, I don't know if they saw that. Did they see it? The other two groups, the Torius. Yeah, I'm going to figure that out on their turn.

I'm going to assume yes, because that was quite a spectacle you just put on. But, yeah, I would assume yes, but I'm going to figure that out specifically on their turn. However, that being said, it is the chimera's turn. And then after the chimera is Toll, then Natty, then Doug. All right, chimera, like I said, is still rather upset. You bothered it and got up in its space, but you went away and you didn't hurt it. So I think at this point, it's a little more focused on the Taurians. As you're looking at the chimera, it seemingly kind of like hunkers down like it's ready to pounce.

And then out split five duplicate reflections of the chimera. So now it looks like there's six of them on the ceiling. Cool. Oh, no. Well, I'm glad we did that first. It fixates on the Horius's, and it seems like gravity changes for them. Instead of standing on the floor, all of a sudden, they all slide towards one of the walls. And it seems like that is now down for them.

Oh. Gravity has seemingly shifted beneath their feet. And as they slide along the floor towards the wall, they lose grip of various wet. and catalanxes that also slide along the floor near them. And they take a little bit of falling damage, not too much. Okay. Yeah, that's what it will do for this moment. Tov, you're up.

Okay. Do I see where the downed painting is that we're here to, like, correct? Yeah, that's on the ceiling near the chimera. So is it, like, flipped around? Like, or is it, I thought, because I would assume it was on the ground. Yeah, you see the back of it. You assume that that is the painting up there. Okay.

And how far away is that? About 50 feet up. Okay. So I have the stockings of spider silk, which makes me, allows me to climb sheer surfaces. So with that, I'm going to start belining towards the painting to flip it around. Because not only do I see this as completing the mission, but also an exit strategy. So I have a walking speed of 40 feet, so I'm going to make my move up to there. And then how close does that put me to the chimera?

It's pretty close because the chimera was next to the painting. So if you have a walk speed of 40, it was to say you're within like 10 or 15 feet away. Okay. Debating on if I should attack it or if I should just kind of not prok agro. If I double moved, I wouldn't be able to try to heft it. Would I be too many things? Yeah, correct. Okay, okay.

What if we escape out the painting we came in? There is no painting. Yeah, you just appeared here. The comparison I made was like when Holt used it in the last episode and just appeared in the forest. Because we went through the painting that we made, right? Yeah, yeah, correct. Now that I'm within 10 feet of the chimera-war-rahura, I'm going to use my other Thometech fame item. And it's going to be the Mitten of Mushrooms.

It's a mushroom covered thomtec gloves, smells musty, spongy texture. Making a fist releases fungal spray, 15-foot cone DC-13 con save on failure. Target enabled to form short-term memories for 1D4-term turns. On success, Target loses current train of thought. So I'm just trying to add to the disarray into the confusion and also make myself small and unnoticeable, but also like mix things up. All right, so that's a DC-13 Constitution save? Yes.

Okay. here is plus six, so I need a seven or better. Roll a nine, so that's 16. That's a successful save. I'm going to roll a D4, so you lose Trinthoff for two turns. Yeah, you are unable to form short-term memories for two turns. Okay, I'm going to make a note of that. And I think that normally, like I said, there were different images of the chimera.

Normally, I would say, like, maybe you didn't get the right one, but it seems like this is an area of effect. So I think your mittens would cover the area of effect with all of them. Yeah, it's a 15-foot con. Yeah. Okay. Now that it can't form memories for a couple turns, in theory, if I were to do something,

it's going to forget about it in a turn. So I have an extra attack. Before I do that, I'm going to rage because I've learned that now. He's doing it. He's finally learned how to use his powers for good. This is for you, brother and sister. And I'm going to, because I'm not close enough, I'm going to throw a jablin at one of the chimera

Rororas and hope for the best. So real fast, looking back at your mitten of mushrooms, I just want to get a quick rule clarification. Sure. So it says on failure, target is unable to form short-term memories for 1D-4 turns. That's if it failed its save. On success, it succeeded at save. Target loses current train of thought.

Oh. That's so good. Yeah. So it just loses its current train of thought. It's not that it can't form. Memory. Yeah, that was in my mind. I was like, that seems powerful.

Still really powerful. And its current train of thought is that it's fighting us. So if it loses that train of thought, right? Yeah. Current train of thought, throwing a javelin. Maybe if you'd done it the opposite order. The smile is not reaching Blaine's eyes. Something in that something.

I'm going to throw a javelin. Okay. Oh, and I'm raging. Okay. Yeah, he's doing it. We heard gum gum. Make your... Yeah, yeah.

Go and make an attack roll. Make your attack. Okay, okay. 21. That hits. However, I want you to roll me a D6. Oh, no. It's four and five others or four others?

Five others. It's a one in six chance. Daddy needs to do a pair of shoes. Fort! Fort! Your javelin flies to striking the chimera and one of the beautiful swing shot of existence. Farts.

Okay. Well, now it's one in five. You're welcome. I guess I don't need to do damage then because it makes no sense. Yeah. All right. It's a previous train of thought

of fighting the Taurus is gone. Now it has a new train of thought. No. I'm so bad at this. Why would do this to us? All right, Tolf. Anything else you want to do? Just die.

Brace for the sweet embrace of Natty's wife. Oh, speaking of Natty, you're up. But before it's your turn, Natty, the Chimira steps in with an action here between your turns. What? It can do that. I'm betting it's got turns for every head, so three turns. Yeah, one of the other heads' turns. turns and looks at you and tries to take a bite at you,

toll, which we'll say the walrus head, because that's kind of frightening, lashes out with giant tusks and tries to impale you with them. Hitting a C-20. Oh, God, that's a plus eight. Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, wait, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on. Yeah, what does rage do?

Just take, just take the hit, just take the hit. Just take the hit. You take half of the damage, basically. If it's piercing, right? Bludgeoning, piercing, or slashing. Oh, my gosh. I accept your 20. Just take the hit.

So that would normally do 21 points of bludgeoning damage, but since you're raging, you take half. So you take 10 points of bludgeoning damage. I just want to say, I'm so thankful that you didn't use your internal monologue to save that thought blame. That is it for its interrupt there. So Natty, you're up. Okay.

And then after Natty is Doug, then the Torians. or so we think. What was like the, I don't know, the vibe of the gold chasers when they came in? I can't remember if they said anything. They were like, they didn't want us to be in here with the gold. That's a great question. At the end of the previous episode, when they entered the room, they exclaimed, in the name of the golden rod,

you should all vacate his vault at once. Okay, okay. So they're just doing what their God wants them to do generally, protect their temple of some kind. Now that you said that, I'll reread the Wendathe when the Torians came in, they had exclaimed that the croak folk is back and he's got friends with him. And then they had

tossed the Cadillaxes at the chimera. Okay. Just because John's a curious little lad, I'm going to use Moment to Think as a bonus action. And I don't know, you called out that there's a well in the middle of the room with water faucets that pour

into it. Yeah. I'll reread that and I'll give you a little more context. You've had a moment to think about it, Maddie. Yeah. So in this vault, the floor is covered with piles of gold coins. Avi. In addition to that, there's six arched caverns within the room, each filled with mounds of unique golden treasure.

And then specifically, you're asking about the well. There is a golden well in the center of the room. And then separate from that, there's two water fountains, a blanket on either side. Okay, there's water fountains, not like school water fountains, It's more like fancy restaurant water fountains. Exactly. Like they're big rectangular pools with water fountains.

Okay, I am still curious about the well. So now he's going to use her a moment to think to go and investigate the well. I can't interact with it, but I can't look. Yeah. So it's a gold-bricked well that's about three feet by three feet in the center of the room with the two rectangular water fountains made of stone flanking either side of the well. Uh-huh. The well itself is filled with what appears to be liquid-grift.

gold. However, the fountains are spraying and filled with what appears to be regular water. Okay. Well, that didn't teach me anything. Well, is that what Doug was getting sprayed with and turning into gold last time? Because it looked like water, but it would turn him to gold, right? Yeah, and also the golden rod did something that dumped what appeared to be water on you and turned Doug into gold. And then there was also the trap in the lab that was similar that sprayed water down from the archway that turned you to gold. Yeah, so that's probably the ice.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Stuff that turned anybody who got doused with it into gold, it was water-like. It wasn't liquid gold. You can make an Arcana check if you want to see if you can ascertain anything further. I rolled a 13. What do I ascertain? I will say sidebar, aside from that, arcana check, you know, now that you're looking to investigating.

Everybody leave the room so Gus and I can have a sidebar. Investigating it a little further, you do see what appear to be some fish swimming in the fountain. What? in the water side. Water? Like the golden rod? Are they those goldfish that stole my gold? Natty did not see those, so I can't say that for certain.

Now I want goldfish. This is nice of smiles back. Not sponsored. But you think that there is some kind of magical aura emanating from the golden well itself. Okay. Like it has some kind of transmutation property that will transform items. Okay. Well, mostly we've just seen stuff get transmuted into gold.

So I don't really know how that's going to help. Okay. Well, thank you for my moment to think. I appreciate it. Okay. Then, yeah, I feel like this is such a messy situation with, like, 13 other combatants, and just we've got the shield. We just need to get that painting up.

So how can Natty help with that? You said it's around 50 feet. Yeah, and then to further. kind of restaged the room in your head. The Toreus are no longer on the floor. They've slid away to one of the walls. The gold chasers are on the other side of the room. To hold this is on

the ceiling near the painting and near the chimera. Yeah. Just hanging out. You're upside down, so it's who you. Who you? Okay, so I use that as my bonus action, so I can't do that.

So then, as far as, like, actions I can take. Okay. Then I'm just going to, you know, let's do something fun. Go over to one of the water founts with the fish. Okay. I'm going to end my moment to think so that I can interact with stuff. I'd like to grab one of the fish.

Okay. It's like bare-handed. Hmm. Nandy's wearing gloves. Yeah. No, I mean, like, you don't have like a net or like. Like, mage hand. A rod.

You're just going to reach him. I have, yes, I do have something. His name is Gigi, and I'm going to use him to try to get a mouthful as much of the water and the fish as he can. Okay. You don't like dunk his head in. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's exactly I was going to say you pick him up and stick his head.

You know, bobbing for apples. You waterboard him? I'm not going to waterboard him. I'm going to put him in, but he's going to, you know, be my little hungry, hungry hippo. Open wine. Yeah. You know, you pick Gigi up and stick him into the well. And as you're doing that, the fish seem to get excited.

And you can hear, like, gurgling coming from them. And cheers? Question mark. You stick Gigi in and he takes a big gulp of water and comes out. Do you want him to, like, spit the water and the fish out of the fountain? Yeah, I'm going to go over to, I'm going to take my little super-soaker gigi, and I'm going to go over to the Toreans, the Toreuses, and I'm going to, you know, give my little boy a hug.

Hymn like maneuver. Yeah, a little bit of squirt up. Okay. Your super-soaker gigi sprays, water, and fish all at the Toreus. And the fish shoot out, and, you know, you get a bit of a bit of, a closer look at them now. You can see their barrel eye type fish with transparent jelly heads and stomachs and upward facing golden eyes. They've got an amorphous polyp coated gullet. And you spray them all over the torres and they begin gurgling and cheering and you see the

Toreas start trying to swipe them off and swat them away from them as fast as they can. And it seems like the fish are doing something. They're not eating the Toreas but they're like kind of biting at them and flopping around. New from Super Soaker, the Giginator. Spray your friends. Oh, gross. Comes with its own ammo, goldfish. But they're kind of messed up.

Each said sold separately, batteries not included. Would you, I would imagine that, that obviously counts as my action. That counts as Giggy's action. If it does, it's okay. We can move on. I say it only takes one of yours. Either you do the action for all of that or he does the action. Yeah, no. All I wanted to do was, you know, Gigi got to do all that and got to see the fish doing that.

And he wants it on the fun. So I'm going to throw Gigi at the Toreuses. And he can join in in this kind of a nibbling fest. Sure. How does he do that? Does he like a... He's going to bite somebody. Start biting at the... Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. So give me a... Can I do an attack on one of the Toreuses? Sure. With the Gigglesworth. Go for it.

Okay. My biting attack. Yeah. He has rend. So I'm going to use rend. Oh, that's not going to roll. 14 plus 5, so 19. That's it.

And then he does slashing damage with the D4. Which I'm going to roll with real dice. And soon, very soon, I'm going to roll with our new dice that we have at Misty Mountain Gaming. Oh, wait. Do you have it? Wait, I want to see. No, I don't have. I'm waiting for my, where we haven't, we're recording this before.

I've got them in my hand. so I'm going to use some other Missy Mountain Gaming. They're available now on the store. They are available now when we... Yeah, yeah. By the time you're hearing this, they're available. Yeah. They're so pretty.

And I want people to know that those are there. Oh, that's a four plus three, so that's seven slashing damage, and the target has the poison condition. Just FYI, a little peek at the way I'm managing things on my end. Since there's a lot of enemies, I'm treating them as like... Broop, swarm? A horde or a herd, yeah. Okay.

So, there were six, twiq. Gigi goes in and attacks. One of them stops moving. So now there's five Toreuses. Yay. Okay. And Nadi's just going to, like, if she had a camera,

she'd be taking pictures for memories because it's just watching your little baby boy do his thing. It was just magical. She's just taking mental images. Yeah. That's it. Is that it for your turn?

Yeah, yeah. Unrelated question. Does Gigi carry anything on him? You know, my undying glove. Yeah, now I'm at, like, a physical inventory. That's pretty physical. You took his axe away.

What did he get instead of his axe? Yeah, there was something he had traded out that he wanted to hold on to more. It was recent, too. Yeah. It was like a... Another weapon? Another axe? I don't think I wrote it down.

I do not remember. While you look that up, I'll say the notorious's, you know, are kind of swatting at Gigi as he's biting at them. And you can hear them shouting at him. How dare you bite it a fellow demon? Where are your priorities? Oh. I think you're seeing where his priorities are. right now as he bites you. That's what he likes

more than anything. But no, Giggy doesn't carry anything else with him. He's just got his harness and... What about his daipy? Yeah, I mean, yeah, that sometimes is a loaded weapon. Sometimes there's treasure in there. Okay, that's it for Natty. Doug, you're up. I'm wondering if there's like a significance

to the number six here, because you said there's six Torreuses, six gold chasers and six arched caverns. Or is that just happens to- I'll be honest with you, that's coincidence. Okay. What's trying to tell us, Six, six, six, the signs of the devil. I didn't realize it until right now. I figured there wasn't, but...

And I hate telling you there's not, because it's like, then I don't want to affect your line of thinking. But not. No, I wouldn't have done anything about it anyways. I was just curious. It's totally random. Doug, something catches your eye. Like it.

You didn't see this earlier when you first came into the room, but now with, you know, the action kind of settling in and Gunther having gone up to the ceiling and Toll standing around. around up there. There's something else attached to the chimera near its tail, something that you've been looking for as a matter of fact. You think you see the thresholder up there. What? Oh no. Could I do like a reality check?

Yeah. Are we being fooled? Vibe check maybe? Or like, yeah, I don't know what check it would be to... Do it in sight, maybe... Inside, okay. Thresholder? Isn't that the thing that did a boo-boo on your brother? The axe that Doug made for his brother? Oh, no. That is a 16. That is it.

That is the thresholder. What the heck? What's going on? What's wrong, Doug? My brother's axe is in the chimera, but I don't know how it even ended up here or... I mean, I think it's real. Like his body spray or... Yeah.

Gus, is it... Links for our British... Listen, yeah, yeah, yeah. Also, like, how many times have we had the word axe in every single campaign we've ever had, and now that's the first time that's the joke is coming up? Is it, like, embedded, attached, or is it, like, clearly, like, it's the end of the chimera or's tale? It's, like, attached, kind of like how the Wilder Shield was stuck up in it.

It's similar. Like, like, embedded into, a foreign object embedded. Sure. Yeah, like that. Did you say, it had, like, shards of mirror. Do you say, like, something about diamond as well? It's, like, diamond hard. Diamond hard, okay.

Are there any pieces of the shards that have, like, fallen or, like, that are in the room somewhere? Yeah, Doug, you look around. Why don't you make me a luck check? Roll the D20. A luck check? Yeah. Okay. Twelve?

Oh, that's lucky. Very lucky. You're able to find, we'll say, two shards. Okay. And, yeah, Mike is saying that I think you all may have seen some in the great hall where you first encountered the chimera. Yeah, I just don't remember. I found some in my stomach. I remember that.

Woof. It does know that the only thing sharp enough to cut diamond is diamond. So I think he's going to load up a piece of that shard into his crossbow. Oh. And try to fire it at, I guess, the scorpion head? Or what about the tail where you're, the axis? I'm trying to, like, take this guy out, but I don't know if that I'm doing it. Yeah, do you?

Yeah. I'll just try to fire it at it. I'll aim for the head. We'll see what happens. Just saying this, not trying to persuade you one way or another, just saying this to remind you about the scenario, there are four mirror images of the chimera as well. Could I just see the one that, like, am I able to tell the one that just last try to attack us?

No, because when it attacked, it was before it had the mirror images. Well, dang. Okay, well, should I roll a D4 and then pick that? Well, you make your attack, and then if your attack hits, then we determine. whether or not, which it is. Okay, so I'm going to use my crossbow to fire a piece of the mirror shard. Okay.

That is a 18 to hit. That would be a hit. So now you rolled at D6. Six. One of the reflections blinks out of existence. Okay. So there's three or four left? There are three duplicates left.

So four total score. Correct. And then Gambot is ready to go. Actually, no, I'm going to do that again. So I have two attacks. I always forget. Yeah, we can whittle it down. Hitting again.

Ooh, 20. Nice. Nice. Yeah, that's a hit. And go ahead and roll the D6 again. Three? One of the other reflections, or the duplicates, blinks out of existence. So you've got three left.

Correct. Two duplicates, one real one. As your shard and bolt fly through one of the duplicates and hit the ceiling, We'll say that they fall down to the ground and clatter near you if you want to use them again down the road. Yeah, I would probably just grab them back. And then could I have Gambot go over to the gold fountain? Yeah.

The gold well, rather. Yeah, it's in the middle of the room. And then... Gonna make Gambot the Goldbot? Gambot the gold bot. Khy them jump in. Yeah, Gambot jumps into the well. It's not terribly deep.

Can Gambot swim or... Yeah, I would say so. Does you, like, deploy, like, a little propeller? Yeah, absolutely. He has different, like, bottoms. He has, like, the little wheels. He has little feet, and then he has little propellers. Did he turn into, like, a little torpedo?

And then my picture, when he wants to float and come to the surface, it's, like, the moonlanders in the ocean. He deploys, like, those balloons at the bottom. And he, like, hoops up to the surface. Yeah, he's very multifunctional. So typically, what is Gambat's movement? Because typically swimming speed is about half of your regular movement speed. 40 feet.

Okay. Oh, yeah, so I think he'd be able to swim 20. So the gold brick well itself is only about three feet by three feet in size. But once he's in, Gambot figures out that the well is about 10 feet deep. Do I notice if anything happens to him while he's in there? He goes in. Are you able to communicate with him while he's there? Or do you wait for him to like pop back up?

I'll probably wait for him to pop back up. Because yeah, I don't think I could communicate with him while he's submerged. So you, uh, Gambot goes in and, you know, swims around for a little bit. And then after just a couple of seconds, it pops up and you see you got your solid gold Gambot. Goldbot, as it were. Wow.

You look good in Gold Gambat. And then could I have him jump back out? Yeah. He jumps out and responds affirmatively. He seems like he's, I would assume he's happy. I don't know if the gold is a permanent effect. It wasn't when I got it. Yeah, but it'd be so cool if going to him,

I was suddenly just like shiny new gold. That would be cool. He hops out gold but does not seem to respond. He's evil. He's become too rich. Okay. Do I have enough movement? This might be too much,

so feel free to say no, to take him and dunk him into the water fountain. Yeah, no, we'll say you're able to pick him up and take him to the water fountain. You dip him in, and he's still, solid gold. Gambot? You in there, buddy?

You still with me? The fish begin cheering and swinging around. It seems like they're trying to bite at Gambot when you dip him in there. Okay, I'll pull him out. Yeah, no, it seems like he's a solid gold gambon. Well, hopefully I didn't just ruin my little guy forever. If he did, you could buy a new one.

Not that simple Could you buy a new bun lap, Gunter? No, that's true. I just, I'm sorry, that was a mean joke. But I hope is okay. So I guess that's my trick? Yeah. It is the glorious turn, and they are, like I said, they're sideways.

They're attached to the wall. However, Gigi is near them. They're going to go ahead and try to, they're going to try to swipe at Gigi. They're not at full strength just because they did lose grip on some of their weapons, but they're still going to try to. But Gigi's also a demon. They're a little confused by that.

Well, I don't want them to hurt my boy, but the boy did just kill one of their guys. Yeah, that's like, like, in my mind, it's like they're going to do something. It's like how they respond, whether, what kind of attack they do. Yeah, you're right, Micah, don't overthink this. Yeah, they're going to just make an attack and try to subdue the Gigglesworth. Ooh, that's not a good role for me. That is a 14. That actually hits him.

Oh, okay. Five plus nine is 14. They begin, you know, swiping with what weapons they have, trying to attack Mr. Gigglesworth. And they do... They are poisoned, though, if you're going to treat them like a swarm. Oh, okay. Unless you want to call that the guy he killed is the one who had the poison effect.

Yeah, no, no, you're right. They are poisoned and that... So I think that gets disadvantage. So I will roll again. This is a... Oh. 25. So yeah, we'll stick with the first one.

That's a 14. So that hits and they do... I'm going to make a note here that they're poisoned so I don't forget again in the future. They're poisoned until Gigi's next turn. Okay. They do 80 points of damage. Gigi's down.

Oh. 80 points? Yeah, there's 4. Five of them. What? They're attacking like a herd. Yeah, they managed to knock Gigi down. So he's no longer threatening them.

Just kicking a child while it's down. Just like four adults, five adults. Nadi is losing it. Precious cargo down. Precious cargo down. Look, Torv. They traveled in hurts. All right.

I'm going to shoot you with an Eldridge Blast. You make a joke about my child dying. Not that but your child. Gunther, you're just making it worse. Uh-oh, Natty's seeing red. I don't think y'all have seen Nadie like this before. On that note is the gold chasers. Then after them, we're going to go back up to the top of the initiative order.

Back to Gunther. The gold chasers, they want you all out of here, as they said before. What? And they have some other motivations you all have heard. You might not remember at the moment. Yeah, I think that they would probably go up to Doug. They would probably go up to you and tell you, We cannot stress enough that you all need to leave this room immediately.

We know we've encountered you all before, so we're giving you this one pause before we take action. You must all vacate immediately, or else face our wrath. Sounds pretty convincing to me. We've got to basically, if we need to get the axe, though. We're trying to leave. And I think that they would continue past you trying to go accoste the Taurus.

Wait, wait, wait. This is coming from the... The gold chasers. The Gleysers. We're here helping their deity, though. We should tell them that. Like, we were, hey, yoo-hoo, we were sent here by the golden rod

to fix this painting. Why do you think I'm up on this roof next to this giant, walrus Tasmanian devil scorpion pteractyl wing thing? We're here to wear on the same sides. You communed with the golden rod? Yes. Yeah, downstairs were the painting

portal goes to this normally. Have you noticed that it was closed off? Well, what do you think it was closed off? This stupid thing flipped the painting around. Duh. Well, make haste. Be quick about your work. If you guys want to help us, we'll go even quicker. How's that sound? We are helping.

That seems like you're threatening us. I don't know if that's very helpful. Come on, guys. L loosen up. Let's just have some fun with it. All right? We'll get this painting fit. We'll get out of here. We'll be out of your hair. And get the axe, too. We'll take that axe. This payment because we're helping you a ton.

We'll find Belder while you're at it as well. Do we odds are looking for him? He's our divine. Her. Her. Yeah, let us know. I think that they would continue on over towards notorious. Okay, that'll take us back up to the top.

Gunther. You've got your thing, dude. Yeah. Yes. He just leaves. He just goes. You got your bang. Wow, Gunther, great working with you, pal.

Wow. So happy for you. Punea, here he comes. Maybe you could do what you just did for. for my axe up there. The axe is important to you. It is important to me. Doug is my friend.

So if it is important to Doug, it is important to me. And if it's important for Bun Lap, it's important for me, Toh. Nattie? I didn't hear anything you say. I just looking at my little baby boy lying there on the floor.

What are you guys talking about? There is a baby getting killed by demons. I guess Gunther would give the shield to Bunlap so that he's not also. like, it's safer. I'm going to give this to the wilder flower. I'll take credit for this. No, no, we shall share it, please.

I would think that Doug would see this gesture of Gunther giving the Wilder Shield to someone else to hold on to as like a momentous occasion of like love and support for Doug that he's going to go try to get his acts up there. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That was very moving to Doug. That's good insight That's a good way to think about it Because he knows how important that Wilder's shield is to Gunther

So he's like Yeah Gunther seeing what Doug was doing Could I try and wrap a shard To the tip of my sword Okay Just like you know with a string or rope or something So that it's like

Stabs with that as well He just keeps getting cut Yeah that's what I was saying It's a pretty sharp piece Yeah I mean but yeah The guess and sure Okay and then Leaprog.

Gus has gone far. Gus has gone very far because I remember a time when Blaine was like, can I pick this lock with a sconce? Candlestick? And he was like, no.

I will say in that scenario, you all also did not have any of your equipment. Trapped in a cell with all my bros. Being a person with nothing trying to pick a lock with a sconce, I stand by that. Gunther has his stuff.

I bet you I could pick a lock with a spruce. Why don't we prove it? We might just have to. That's a good video. Let's prove it. I bet I can do it. Yeah, Blen, let's prove it.

I want the lock picking lawyer to make a video picking the lock with a sconce. You'd do it no problem. Also, spoiler alert, I'm just going to take the sconce and smash the lock with the scons. And then, yeah, I will repeat the same maneuver, but kind of throw a train and the hand

where I'm like right in the middle between all three of the remaining ones. I see, yeah, because you don't want to target a specific. one, you're going to kind of go between all of them? I want to be able to kind of like attack all three of them. How are you going to adhere yourself to the ceiling? I'm hoping I get up there and then I go, snap, zap, sap, sap.

So you're going to go up and at the apex of your movement, you're going to attack and then you're going to continue falling down so you're not going to hold onto the ceiling? I guess I could hold on. Is there a thing I could hold onto you on the ceiling? I'm asking you. You tell me. All right, I hold onto the ceiling. Is there a thing I can hold on to?

You-hoo, I'm standing right here. You could hold on to Toll? I hold on to Toll. You could, I'll tell what, you could hold on to Toll, you could hold onto Toll, you could hold onto the painting? Oh. Oh, yeah, that's on the same. That sounds good. I'll hold on to the painting.

Did you just do that? Yeah, it's probably has like a frame. Wait, yeah, okay. Paint this picture for me, Gus, because I thought the painting was turned over and on the floor slash ceiling. which means it's adhered gravitationally to the ceiling. Well, you climb. You know, it's got handholds and things that you could. What I was saying, is it that, is it that, is it that?

So if I grabbed it when it fall? This is this one like, is it that stuck to the ceiling? Because then we can't flip it over. Right. That's my only concern. That's a good question. I'll say that to be determined. Okay.

All right. Fine. I'll do this. I'll jump up and I want to meet, before I make my first attack before I get to any of them. Okay, so you're going to... Like, before I grab. Propel in the air, attack, and then attempt to grab. Yeah.

This is the longest slow-mo ever. I will say, this is going to be a high check to try to accomplish. The attack, sure, you can do on the way. The, like, holding on and all of this stuff, we're going to set kind of a high difficulty on it. And the chimeras are all close, they're close to each other. What's your attack range five or ten? So I also have this new thing that I got where I can extend my sword like a tongue.

Whoa, what? Your sword? Yeah. Like a tongue? Ribbit ribbon. Oh, from the throng tongue, right? Yeah, as a bonus action, I squeezed the hilt twice and the blade gains an additional five feet of reach until the end of my turn. So normally I'd say you wouldn't be able to attack two different ones, but because you have that kind of reach, you could attack two different ones if it can't.

down to it. Okay. You see what I'm saying? Yeah, yeah. Are we ready to get this started? Let's do it. Okay. You and Bunlap perform your leapfrog maneuver again.

By this point, you know, it's back. You're back in the rhythm. You know what you're doing here. You fly up towards the ceiling and take a swipe at one of the chimeras. So make your attack roll on that. 21. You grunted like you were disappointed with that. That is a hit.

No, that was me going yes. Roll a D6 to see if you hit the correct one. How many are there left, three? There are three that you see. Five. No, that is incorrect. One of the other ones splashes out. So now there are two remaining.

50. 50. So close. Again. So I'll attack another one. Mm-hmm. So make your attack roll. This darn guy.

Uh, uh, wait. What'd you roll for the audience? It's a 12 for our listeners. That's why he's saying, wait. All right. I use my spear or you, inspiration die. Inspiration die. Okay.

Yes. Super inspiration. 17. It's a 9 plus an 8. That's a 17. Oh, that is exactly the number you need. That hits a roll a D6 to see if it connects with an actual one. Now I have a one and two chance, right?

Not really. There's a separate mechanic behind the screen going on here with that. Six. You hit one of the mirror images and it flackens out of existence. On the bright side, there's only the correct chimera left. Only the real one. Yeah. Nice.

Okay. Don't worry. Its turn is coming up. It can pass that spell again. No. Don't give them ideas. How far away is that last one? Can I attack it by action search?

Action search. How many times you're going to let this croak folk make an attack midair? I'm going to say no just because of the spacing. Like already, to hit two of them was difficult because of the space between them. The third one I would say would be like out of range, like 15 feet from where you are. To be fair, after Blaine tries to pick a lock with a scones, we will let Chris jump on a trampoline and try to stab three targets at the same time. How far away are you target them? The way I see that going is that Chris jumps up in the air and then falls down on a sword.

Okay, okay, okay. Well, then can I grab hold of Toll? Yeah. Or the painting? I'll do the painting. Okay, you want to try to grab onto the painting? Make a athletics check, but I'm going to need a real high number out of you here, Gunther. Okay.

Athletics or acrobatics? Let's see. I feel like that would be more acrobatic. Yeah, yeah. I guess acrobatics, because you are flying through there. We'll call it acrobatics then. Oh, 23. I was thinking the number I had in my head was 20.

So I'm going to say, yeah, that that is successful. You reach up and you grab onto the painting. And going back to John's question, I didn't want to answer it at the time because you all don't know how it works and I didn't want to affect your decision-making. But yeah, you grab onto it, and something other than gravity is holding it on.

So it is adhered to the ceiling, so it's stuck. So it does manage to hold your weight. So you are dangling from the frame of that painting. Hang on, Gunther! I have to, yes! All right, I assume that does everything for your turn? Yeah. Okay, it's the chimera's turn.

How far, sorry, really quick, because this might affect things. How far away am I from chimera? Pretty close. You, oh, we said you were 10 feet away, I believe. Dang it, okay. It would be better if I was 5 feet away, I'm just saying. I don't want to move that chimera? be pretty cool.

The walrus head, the Tasmanian devil head, and the scorpion head and tail, I'll kind of turn and regard the two of you. Gunther, you made quite a bit of noise on your flight up and your attacks against it. So I think the, we'll say the Tasmanian devil head focuses on you a bit. Tasmanian devil. Sorry. Always hear that from a space jam every single time. Yeah.

The Tasmanian devil head. reaches out and tries to take a bite out of you, Gunther. Hitting AC. It was almost a one, and then it rolled over to a nine. Hitting AC 17. 17. Oh, shoot. I forgot my armor class is halved.

Oh, right. Because the Wilderflower told him not to look for the Wildershield. My armor class is halved and my HP is halved. Oh, my God. Oh, no. I'm so glad we're risking our lives for this Wilder Shield for this deity that hates you. I mean, right now he's risking it for the, acts to be fair.

Yeah, okay. So, yeah, that will, um, hit. Right, and that hits for 21 points of bludgeoning damage. Did it get, did it move at all? Like in closer to 12, you know?

Just like, you guys are so needy. Yeah, um, okay. 21, that was a lot. Yeah. Oh, go go. Go go. It's raining on you guys.

And I would say no, it doesn't move because from a metagame perspective, the reach on its attacks are 10 feet. So it does not need to be within 5 feet of either of you to attack. Great, great, quick, cool, cool, cool. The scorpion tail swings around and tries to take a swipe at you, Toll. Ooh, ooh, wait, no, that's fun. Yeah, no, instead of swiping at you, that right head, said the scorpion head opens up its mouth and tiny shards of, mirrors and glass come flying out at both of you. Both of you make dexterity saving throws.

Okay, I got advantage on that. That's a 16. 17 and a 19. You both made it, man, okay. You still do take some damage. You take a little, you take half damage. You take 10 points of piercing damage as the razor sharp shards fly all around you.

But I'm raging so I take five. You take five. Yeah! I have a thing called interposed shield. If you're subject to an effect that allows you to make a dexterity saving throw, take only half damage. You could take a reaction to take no damage if you succeed on the saving throw and are holding a shield. And I'm quite, this is my question to you. Would I, does this count as holding a shield if I'm like...

Mike and I had already had a side conversation that in doing this leap, you would not be able to be holding your shield. Okay. Because of the attack and holding onto the frame. So yeah, there is, you would not be able to use a shield at this point. Okay. Great. It's great, great. I'm doing great.

I'm doing really great. You made your save. That's good. No, no, no, yeah, yeah. I'm doing real good. And just to show how fair I am, I'm going to roll a D4. If it's even, this attack is on Toll. If it's odd, it's on Gunther. Cool.

Hit me. You want me. Odd. The walrus head, that is, it's left head. The walrus encompasses the left head and hindquarters of this part of the beast. So, Micah's messaging me.

He's writing, drop a PC, Micah is thirsty for blood. Micah, no. It's the left head is a walrus and the left hindquarters. So the left hindquarters are kind of like the walrus tail. Spins around and slaps at you, Gunther.

Hitting AC. 22. Oh, no. Yeah, that hits. Doing 21 points of bludgeoning damage. Oh. Guthar just like flips backwards and just falls down to the ground. It's like a rag doll.

A Kermit the doll. A Kermit the frog doll just falling from the ceiling all sloppy. Run and try to catch him. Can Bunlap? Because Bunlap shares the turn. True. But he's holding the shield. Well, it's not his turn though.

It's not Bunlap's turn. We're trying to save you, Chris. Yes, and. Now it's not Bunlap's turn. Now that Bunlap's not hopping and propelling Gunther up to the ceiling. Now it's not Bunlap's turn. Yeah, yeah. Yeah.

You're about to take more fall damage. I mean, I don't know if you could take away from zero. Yeah, that's fair. Doug, I'll say unless you have a reaction that allows you to do that on someone else's turn, no. So, yeah, we'll say that Bundlap runs and tries, you know, previously he had jumped up and caught you as you fell with the Wilder Shield. We'll say that he's going to try to catch you again and hopefully shield you from taking full damage. Because if you take double your HP worth of damage, you die, die. Like you don't even get your jet saving throws.

Oh, I didn't know that. Oh my gosh. That's what I'm saying. So you're just like, oh, it's fine. I'll just fall to my doom. What did we do last time? He just jumped and caught you. Did I make a check on that?

I think we said he just jumped and caught you because you had done this before. Oh, but then I rolled the fall damage and I said it was two. That's right. So let's roll 2D6 worth of fall damage for you here. Last time I rolled three, this time I rolled 11. A five and a six.

Yeah, so you both of you take 11 points of fall damage. Wait, both of us, Bunlap takes the damage? Yeah, he also takes. takes this damage because he's falling too. Like he can't use his arms to shield himself. He's having to use his arms around you and cushion you for the fall. Also if a bowling ball is falling and you try to catch the bowling ball to catch it, like save it, you're still going to get hurt by the bowling ball.

Okay, so how much? So that was 11 plus the 20 or no, plus the 10. 10 from the shards, 21 from the tail slap. Yeah, well it's about just the last one. The last one was the tail slap for 21. 21 plus 11? Yeah. Yeah.

So what are you at? That's 32. Yeah. No, it's more than that. What are you trying to determine here, Chris? I'm trying to figure out how much, because I had two health left. So two health... While you were falling, you had two health left?

I had two left before I got hit. Okay, so then you were at negative 19 after the... after the hit. Minus the 11 from the falling, so you got negative 30. Yeah. Minus the 10 from the shards. No, that was before. That was before. Yeah.

Oh, the shards is what killed him? No, the shards is what took him down. down to the two, then the tail slap hit him. Okay. Yeah, he's at negative 30. I'm sorry. Kill on. Yeah, I'm just trying to, I feel like I lost track of how this frog was dying.

Yeah, I took all my health until I got to dying. And then those last two hits were dead. And are you at half HB because of your stupid God? Yeah, so I'm at 42 health. It's total. So that was 30 damage. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So you have 12 HP before your perma death.

Great, great, great, great, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool. Well, that was the. Third attack from the chimera. So, in the good news, that's it for it. It doesn't have any more attacks. That's like the doctor coming in and be like, and the good news is you only have three kinds of cancer, okay? Could have four.

The bad news is the chimera letting go of the ceiling and falling on Gunther does not count as an attack. That's just movement. That's just gravity. No, it's still up there. It has no motivation to move, so it'll stay there. Okay. Toll, you're up.

Okay. This infuriates Tov to a degree that you've never seen him this angry before. And this is even after having seen him go against ironclad. So he is beyond, I'm going to use a harsh word here, peaved off. So he uses this new thing called over-clock protocol, which basically it's like I can super-exam. I'll overcharge my systems, and for the duration, your damage output increases to 1D20. When the protocol ends, roll 1D4 of the side effects table, but we'll get to that later, and it's going to have some harsh consequences.

But I think it's worth it in this situation because I'm upset. So I'm going to use the remainder of my movement to go up to the chimera, and I'm going to take a swing with my Gabel of Gailstrom. And I'm going to, while he's moving, he's putting away his shield. So I'm gonna disengage that so that I can do two-handed attacks. Ooh. Nice. Oh. I'm pretty like if you could like to have like spitting on his hands, rubbing him together,

like getting a real solid grip, both of them on the, on his weapon. I'm imagining you do the bicep thing from Mission Impossible. Yeah. You reload your fist. So I'm gonna roll my attack. All right. That's a great, great, great, great. That's a lot.

What you roll is a one. You rolled a one. Hold a one crapping me right now. Do you have an inspiration die? I do. I'm going to use the inspiration die. That was perfect. Perfect.

I've never been so angry before. So yeah. Okay. He forgot to, after he reloaded his biceps, he forgot to grab his weapon. He just swang with nothing. Like, whoa, what's it? 25.

That's a hit. Okay. Okay. So, like I said before, overclock protocol, I now have a D20 worth of dice. So I guess I didn't have to switch it to two-hand. But you know what?

for the dramatic effect, I'll keep it. Yeah, it's dramatic. That's an 18 plus I'm raging, so that's going to be... Plus two. Yeah, 20. So the thing with overclock protocol that I love, and it worked out for you here, it's like, it's a big risk. You could either, you know, roll a 1 or roll a 20.

I guess in any case, do they have that option or the possibility of rolling a 1, but it's like it's not a guaranteed, it's going to do an amazing thing. It's just like overclock in your computer. You've got to get the voltage ride, You can make sure, you know, dip switches are set appropriately. Okay, nerd.

Anything could happen. Otherwise, you might melt down your computer. Did you apply the heat sink correctly? Okay, Wanny, that's a lot. The gavel of Gailstrom comes down striking the chimera. These are a specific place you want to hit it, like on its back, on its side. I guess, like, crunch it kind of like on its low spine, where, like, everything kind of meets so that all three heads feel it.

Sacraliliac. I don't know if that word is, but I just wanted to say that. Yeah, so you crunch the gavel of Gale's drum down kind of near the base of its spine, shattering some pieces of the mirror and the shards go flying, and the chimera roars in agony and pain and looks at you with anger in all three sets of its eyes. Okay, then I look back and I meet that anger with even more anger. bar. I'm going to attack again. Okay.

Yeah, go ahead and make another attack roll. Oh, thank God. It's working 21, 21. Yes. Oh, that's a hit. Okay. And then I'm going to roll my D20. Okay.

I rolled a seven. However, I have something for this. It is called Savage Attacker. Once per turn, when you hit a target with a weapon, you can roll the damage, the weapons damage, dice twice and use either roll against the target. Oh. So I'm going to use that to re-roll to see if I can get higher.

Okay. Tov's locked in. This like, I don't know if Goonther knows how much Tov appreciates Gunther, but this is very upsetting that he just saw his friend fall from the ceiling. That's more like it. That's a 15 plus 2, 17. That's good. Yeah.

Wow. Yeah, much, much better. Are you hitting it in that same spot again? Yeah. Or somewhere different? Doubling down. You, once again, bring the gavel of Gailstrom down, kind of on the face of its spine,

kind of where the tail branches off on the chimera, and the spot seems to weaken even further with more glass shards, cracking and falling. Doug, make me a luck check. Which is just a D20, right? Yeah. Is this to see if shards are going to fall on to Doug? Nat 20, Doug.

We are locked in. Nat 20, lucky, lucky, lucky. As the gavel of Gailstrom strikes for a second time on the base of the chimera spine, the thresholder becomes unwedged from the tail and begins spinning, falling, you know, head over handle towards the ground from the ceiling. And lays right on Gunther.

Right between his eyes. I mean, am I able to try to catch this? Yeah, sure. Here, I'm going to tell you why I hesitate, Barbara. Yeah, yeah. That role was so good. I'm debating letting it, like, through dumb luck, fall into your hand directly.

Oh, really know. little 20 on the look. We'll just say that, yeah, it just falls like, you look up, you see it, and you just have to like, Doug just has to put his hand out, and it just falls right into his hand perfectly. Wow. Thank you guys. No.

I'm just raging. You just, you know, processing it. Really quick, I don't want to milk this even more, but I kind of want to. Is Gunther directly below the chimera or when Bunlap came in to catch him? Did he kind of move trajectory-wise to where he would be out of from underneath? Yeah, there was some momentum to the side there. So he's not directly under the chimera, just off to the side. You know, he was already 10 feet away from the chimera to begin with.

So say he's maybe, say, 15, 20 feet off to the side from directly under the chimera. It's my kick-cut. But I'm going to see if it works out because I know I've already used my bonus action to do the overclock. I have this thing called Storm. It's involved with my gavel of Gaelsstrom. It says once per long rest with the strike of your warhammer, A blustery gale incites a howling rage into all enemies and allies within a 10-foot radius.

There's nobody else up here, so this only affects the chimera-rara. All creatures within range must make a DC-14 charisma saving-through. On a failed save, the creature is knocked prone by the blustery gale and becomes enraged for up to one minute on a successful save.

The creature is just knocked prone by the blustery gale. The creature can repeat by the saving throw at the end of the turn. Basically, if I hit this thing, theoretically, it goes prone, which, from my understanding, would be it falls off of the roof, thus inciting more damage. Oh, no.

Don't fall on that third. Well, I would say yes, but the one difference here, and I'm not trying to roadblock you here, is that it's not that the chimera is holding onto the ceiling, is that gravity is different for it. I see. So down, up is down for it. So it would fall prone onto the ceiling,

not fall prone off of the ceiling onto your floor. Okay. Then in that case, I will, I think I'm going to stop there then. Because it doesn't do any additional damage. And if anything, it makes them, it could have this thing called blinded by rage, which then makes it super powered. And I don't want that. But if it was going to be like, hey, I can get another 20 dice from that, you know.

Yeah, yeah, no, I definitely know where you're coming from. Okay, that's it for 12. A lot happening there. Natty, you're up. Then after Natty is Doug. Oh, I've got something for you, Natty. It's a new child because your other one died. A new son.

It's Giggy Jr. It's Biggie. He's small. Natty, you see, you know, Giggy fall as the notorious all descend on him, attacking him five on one. And, you know, your vision goes red

with rage, and you, your sight kind of blacks out for a moment. You blink, and when you open your eyes, you're in a different place. You see no sun, no moon, no stars, just a dim purple sky. Black sand dunes ripple with Librenthian spirals, and at the center of the spirals are small cairns. And between the dunes, shallow streams of mist continue on past the horizon.

And standing in front of you, you see the silent steed. Does she say anything? She looks at you and says... Natty, this doesn't have to be the end for Gigi. I can save him. I can save our son. But it will come at a degree. to cost. The choice is yours. I mean, I don't care what the cost is. You take everything. You take it all.

So be it. And with that, your surroundings disappear and you find yourself back in the vault. You blink a little bit and look around and you see Giggy popped up on the ground looking around with a slight confusion on his face. Wait what? He's okay, everybody. He's okay. He's not dead. You didn't do like some sort of weird sacrificial thing or nothing? Now that you look closer at him, Natty, you see that his body's covered in black scars. Whoa. What the heck? Like closed wound, old wound black scars that contrast his red body.

Right. Okay. I mean, that's okay. Scars just show, you know, what we've been through in our lives. It's okay. I want to dip him in the gold fountain? Like, get on? No.

You lost yours today. I don't lose mine. Why, yeah? He's not lost yet. Okay, don't say that. You're right. I'm saying you can, you know, there's stuff you can do to your mechanical little buddy. Mine's my own flesh and blood.

Giggy looks around and walks over. He makes a bee life with the nearest tureus. Picks him up over his head and then rips him in half, tearing his top half from his bottom half. Oh, my God. Campbell, what can you do that? All of the viscera falls down over Giggy and on the floor around him. Dang. Nasty. Well, I mean, I can't say I'm not proud.

That's amazing. Is this Gigi or is this like... Biggie. You have something else. It looks like Gigi. Gigi, I mean, you seem like you're feeling good, Gigi. You okay? He hears your voice and turns and looks at you and his eyes are solid black.

Oh. Oh. Diggy? And she puts her arms out, like, you know, beckoning him to come to her. He's like looking around, looking back at the Tauriuses, looking at you, looking up at the chimera, kind of like he's almost like he's seeing all of this for the first time and taking in the surroundings. Make a persuasion check for me, Maddie. Sure.

What was the cost? Yeah. It was so chilled. They were just like, yeah, have the kid. She just said yes. Yeah, you want him for the weekend? It's only a nine. Do you want a flash of genius?

No, let them play it out. Yeah, he looks at you, considers it, and then darts out of the door in the southwest corner of the vault. Oh, no. Oh, no! Well? Is he not on his leash?

No, because I let him go have his fun and get those Tauruses, Toreans, Toreuses. Toreas. Containment breach. Torines. Yeah, those energy drinks over there. Natty would. Well, he took out one of them, at least.

Yeah, Nattie hasn't done anything for her action, unless you call anything what she's done, but... No. Yeah, Nattie's going to run. Okay. There ain't nothing in this room that's as important as what just left this room to Nattie. I think your son is possessed. Well, he already was sort of. I mean, it's just...

He's like extra super possessed, plus plus ultra-possessed. You know, you guys don't know anything. You don't know what it's like being a mom. You don't know what it's like being giggy. You don't know what it's like being married today. That's correct. I think from where you were in the room, with a single move, you'd be able to get to the door in the southwest corner that he ran out of. Well, I'm double-datt. I'm dashing. I'm dashing.

Okay. Before you make your second move, I will say, you get to that door, which is open, because, you know, Gigi opened it and ran out. And you look down and you see it's a stone corridor, and there's graffiti in dried blood on the walls in there that reads moisture. And sounds of curringing and bubbling of water seem to be emanated from the other side. So then you double move down the passageway. Yeah. Chasing after Giggy. I like to imagine that one of the guys was like, hey, I just saw what happened to your son. She ripped him in half over her head.

Yeah, yeah, he's in my way. You race down the passageway, and you find a golden door that must be locked because Giggy's at it, pawing at it from this side of the room. That's weird. Uh, Giggy, do you, I, do you know what's in there? Are you just trying to, you're a little scared? His head turns around 360. Well, yeah.

He lets out a roar louder than anything you've ever heard him make it before. I think Natty would walk up to the door. I think she would like, still in this, like, craze state he's in. Nanny would still, like, trust that, you know, her wife and Gigi are doing something they're supposed to and would try to open the door. Like, his doorknob? You turn at the door knob and the door opens. Okay.

Somewhere in the distance, the silent steed has a downtrodden look on her face. A single tear falls down her cheek. It's black and sandy. She looks up and says, Now it begins. The apocalypse is nigh. Find out what that means in the next episode of the next episode of the Seat Dragon. Wow, I need to smoke a siggy, huh?

What an episode. Okay. because this episode didn't go very well for us. That was true talking about. You got the Wildershield, you got the Threshold. Yeah, we lost a Goonther fell from the sky and is very close to death. Pretty dying. And then Giggy is also...

Tomato. Straight up dead. If I die, don't bring me back. All right, we'll see you all next time. Action search. Hi, listener. Blaine Gibson here. And I'm proud to announce a new tavern tale coming.

soon called Khyborg Quest. Khyborg Quest is a five-part mini-campaign featuring mud, Bart, and Gum, on a dangerous sci-fi rescue mission to find the coolest infinite kiborg. This is my first time as a dungeon master, and you might be thinking, oh, baby's first campaign. Well, this particular baby has been on a steady diet of 80s action movies, explosions, and lasers, and guess what?

My diaper's full. So don't miss out on Khyborg Quest, available to all paid members on the stinky Dragon Patreon on August 7th. Just go to Stinky Dragonpod.com. Support our show and enjoy Keyboard Quest. Thanks for listening. New episodes of Tales from the Stinky Dragon premiere every other Wednesday

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including Bunlap, voiced by Devin Finn at Devin Carruthers, Undari Antorius, voiced by Ben Ernst at Halcyon Bin, Goliath Gold Chaser, voiced by Joel Rubin at the Joel Hole. Terrible name. The Silent Steed, voice. by Jessica Vasami at Jessica Vasami. There's multiple A's. This week's arrow question was submitted by I-O.

This episode, Tales from the Stinky Dragon, was produced by Ben Ernst and Micah Risinger, written and composed by Micah Rizinger, and edited by Alina LaCorchic. Join us in the tavern next time for another aromatic adventure of Tales from the Stinky Dragon. Dragon, dragon, dragon. That is a 16.

That's it. Yeah, I've rolled a 10 and I have a plus 6. No, I meant like, that's it. It's up there. I was like, is that love? I've really been interested in language lately, especially more than normal, about how flexible it is and how it can be so easily misinterpreted with inflection and tone. And that was a classic. Yeah, because you said, that's it?

Yeah, that's it. Not that's it. Yeah, it is, that is it.