Talkin' Baseball (MLB Podcast) - 63 | Jordan & Jake of Cespedes Family BBQ joined us to talk about... (shrug) but its a great time!

Episode Date: December 18, 2019

We sat down with the Cespedes Family BBQ crew who is alot like us. Two young guys putting out content and doing their best to let people know that baseball is fun. I'd say the conversation got off the rails but I'm not sure it ever started on the rails. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

We are joined with Cessbus Family Barbecue, four Js on the four mics. Let's do it. Now the music naturally gets louder. Oh. Yeah. Wow. Yeah.

This is like a real intro for a real show. YouTube gets mad when Jake doesn't dance the intro. We're like, we can't monetize it. He's not dancing. Yeah. No, this music is by Mike Rotano. He made all our music for us so we can monetize. It's actually the reverse problem.

If I start dancing, they put it as. like NR17 material. Limited ads. One of my most popular videos on YouTube was limited ads because Machado said fuck too much. It's like, come on. He's just saying it. You guys can swear, apparently. Fuck too much.

Ooh, and we're there. What's up? Welcome everyone to talking baseball. We are joined by Sessivus Family Barbecues. That's like your band name, basically. Yeah, it's, yeah, by accident. That was never the plan. Like, I never thought I would get to a place in life

where someone would scumption. scream the last name of a Cuban baseball player and I would turn around. Yeah. Like when you're going to, you know, Jewish. Yeah. That's what it is. When you're going to Jewish day school, that's not something they tell you about. Yeah.

I can't really prepare for that. Yeah, well, thanks for joining this. Four Js. That's part kind of interesting. Well, it is California, so that's allowed here. A lot of Js. Yeah. Yeah, you guys hit up any dispensaries?

No. No. Let's talk about Nashville. Well, tune to curve. This has been a fun game for us because we still don't have a perfect answer. Oh, sports media, blah, blah. What's your guys like elevator pitch? Like, when they ask what Cessbitist family

BBQ is, what do you guys say? Because we need help on it as well. Sure. Well, again, I imagine we do have probably fairly similar answers. Especially now that we learned that you guys know each other since high school. I pull out the prestige worldwide video from stepbrothers on my phone and just show that.

Okay. Yeah. It's kind of weird. Let's get in there. Yeah, yeah. NPR. I die in Ream Show. But yeah, so, no, it's a good question. It's a fair question. What do we explain? Because, like, when you explain, like, well, yeah, like, baseball's funny.

Baseball's fun. We enjoy it. And, like, we talk about it in a way that's, we're enjoying it. Yeah. And we're trying to. Weird that that's not normal, right? I know. And we want to say, we want to, you know, highlight things and show things that, like,

other people are going to enjoy because that's the whole point. They're playing a stupid game. It's entertainment. Yeah. They're wearing pajamas and they're running around, and we love it. And then we got to pay a lot of money. And that's hilarious, as you know. Right.

For the elevator pitch, it's basically like, I think baseball is really fun, and I want to amplify that to people, and I do it online. Right. And I want other people to think baseball. That's it. And that's obviously the thing that you guys have done. Yeah, it's basically the same. You need a J name, and you just need to talk about it.

But it's pretty simple prerequisites. Yeah, but it's like us, you guys and, like, Dallas Bray and Corobis are like the only people. A foolish baseball guy. Oh, yeah, yeah. I think we're trying to get together to do a video together soon. Is he here? No, I don't believe it. But yeah, there's not a lot of people.

And it's MLB scared off young people from having fun with their sport. And they're still kind of like, you guys got accepted into the club. Yeah, that's like something that I think about a lot. Like we got upstreamed in a way where we were very lucky to do that, where we got picked out like when we were in college. And in some ways, working there has informed and changed the way that we do content in some ways. But also like we've, we like to think that we have done. on all we can to kind of push that forward internally.

Right. How did that happen? Like for people that don't know where does the name come from? Sure. How did you get to where you are? Right. Okay. So we,

so you guys know in China's high school, we go back to middle school, but in middle school we really didn't like each other. We're down competing. Really. Yeah. No, not us like that.

We're, that's exactly what's our show. We met at synagogue. Yeah. So, it goes back a little bit further. We met at two synagogue. But to be fair, though, we really didn't like each other in middle school.

Okay. At all. Great. Because it was a small Jewish private. school and there weren't that many people and so we were similar enough where it was like no homie that's my lane yeah you can't you know because i showed up in middle school right and i was like who's this it's like i'm the loud sports fan blonde guy yeah yeah so that didn't go so well in middle school we can't have two baseball fans here no no no um and then come high school it was like well like we're the

only ones who really want to talk about jerks at pro far like it was like damn there's no one else we actually still are uh yeah we're sorry so it was so at that point so at that point And it was like, well, I guess I got to start talking to Jake. The rest of the school was like, you should hit Jake up about this. Yeah, it's like he likes it. You're like, I don't like that guy. He likes baseball. And they're like, well, what?

All of our other friends were like, stop talking about Tomo Oka to me. We're like, all right, well, I guess we're stuck with each other. Never stop talking about Toma Kazuoka to me. And so basically we started Facebook messaging all the time through high school. We would go, we would literally like. go and like just play catch because we live pretty close to each other's two. And then we just started talking about time. Were you guys okay with each other's throws?

Like the first catch? Like was it very, oh my God, if this kid fucking can't throw, then we can't talk baseball. Well, okay, but this is a very important point because the way that Jake throws is not fun to play catch with. So I was a side armor. Yeah. Pitching D3 and it was like, it's just into the ground.

Run and sink. It's not, it's not like, oh, let's go play catch. Like it's like a. That's a night. It's like going to throw a football around and you're punting it to everyone. Pretty much. Jake does that. Except punting it is straight.

So that's Jake. Onside kick. Yeah. Jake likes to do a lot of kicks when you throw a football around. And then you do it right like twice and the third time you kick it in the tree. Yeah. And then you go and chase it. The good Lord gave me this leg.

I'm going to use it. He gave you two. Whoa. Hot takes. ProFar is going to have a huge year. I'm going to break that for you guys right now. Yeah. He said that on the last show when it happened.

It's a take I've decided I'm going to go with. He's top prospect. You know, he was always trying to figure it. out. And then this is his last year before free agency. Huge year he gets a giant payday because they're like, oh, he figured it out and then he's bad again. So every year at the Passover Seder at the end,

we say Bashana Habba and Yerushalai, which means next year we will do... If I attempt to say that, don't... It'll be offensive. I mean, I don't care, but, you know, anti-defamation league might be on your ass. So that means next year, may this be in Israel.

And for my feeling, like, we're not moving there. Like it never actually is. Right. But you still say. You still say it. That's how I feel about Jurgson profile. Okay. Every year.

Next year. Next year he'll be a star. Yeah. But Jake's on it. Big year. He'll get paid. He's reunited with the people that brought him into baseball. AJ Preller.

Yeah. And yeah, maybe. Maybe he's a little reunion. I think next year's a year, Greg Golsson finally figures it out. Oof. Man. I'm sorry, guys. That really just killed.

Well, it's been good talking to the. Thanks. The Human Centipede Family Barbecue. Wow. Follow them. That's true. On YouTube. Where's the name come from?

You want to talk about Cito Culver? Let's talk about the name. Sorry. So basically, we were two Dorky baseball fans in high school, and at that time, Yuenis, Cespitus put out the video where he was doing, he just left Cuba and established residency in the Dominican and made a highlight tape where he's, like, playing catch and, like, working out and running shirtless. And at the end, he's roasting a lot.

he's roasting a pig over a spit. And we were like, that's the, why did he put that in? His mixtape. He said that to Billy Bean, and Billy Bean was like, yes, 36 million. Right. There you go. Because we were, this was after his first season. So the video had come out the year before.

So after first season in 2012 is when we made the website. And we're like, we're never going to have to explain this to anyone. It was like, this is long, but it's like an inside joke. It's like, oh, like, says, but his family barbecue. Yeah. Now it's like. Is there any regret? If you could go back, would you change it?

No. That's a really interesting question. Well, the other thing is, is that I know he hasn't played baseball in 15 years, but the other thing is like, throughout the whole thing is like, oh, you should have named it after Pui, you should have named it after this guy,

it's like, no, we picked the right dude. Like, he has delivered in all of the ways. He's, he gave us two home run derbies. He carried a team to the World Series. Diamond necklace is shattered on the field. He's showing up at different cars every day. Like, he is a total baseball weirdo, and also he's really freaking good.

He just needs to, like, get an injury on a horse next, then you got the whole thing. I know. So it sucks that he's been... Not a horse. Donkey. The horse was unconfirmed, I thought. That injury.

He stepped in a hole. It was a hole. People just assumed it was a horse. That was a horse. Don't ruin my... Don't tell me Santa's not real. Yeah. I fell off a horse.

Okay, it fell off a horse. Well, the point is, is that I hope he comes back and plays baseball again sometime. Yeah. He should. Yeah. No, I hope so. If not, he'll just go to some other league and play baseball. No, he won't.

No, he'll be an amateur golfer. Has he reached out? Has anyone from his camp been like, hey? Well, that's the thing, right? So the funny thing is that his camp is currently the GM of the Mets. So, uh, do you hear about that? Don't get started. We just did this with Cusnik.

We just got riled out. Okay, that's fine. Well, no, but, but at this point, we think that if it was a problem, they probably would have said something by now. Yeah. And it's not like, we're, we've been amazing PR. Yeah. Yeah.

Like who, and the, who was thinking positive thoughts about Joannis? Or that word cesspitus and the, last calendar year. Yeah. But like, you need to be invited to a family barbecue. Working on that.

We actually have some ins. We have some ins, but it hasn't, I mean, that's the last thing. Then we have to retire. That's the problem. Because once that happens, it's like,

all right, pack it up. Well, and I can confirm that there is an annual family barbecue that actually does take place around spring training, like in Florida near his ranch or on his ranch.

Like, that's a thing. Every family has barbecues, I think. Yeah. We just have to get there. Yeah. I mean, but the thing is you go there and they're like,

hey, who are you guys? you're not like us, then you're saying, actually, we're your barbecue. We're obsessed with his family barbecue. And so many of them are going to be like, we do. Is this the dinner? We don't get this. We met him once.

Yes, yes. And did this conversation happen? Kind of, yeah. So we met him in 2015 when he was with the Tigers. Forget how much this dude got bounced around. Remember when he was with the Red Sox? I don't know. No, no, no, no.

I don't know. We blocked that out. But Tigers, but he was good with the tort, obviously, before he got traded. And so we were in Anaheim, and we got it set up with a mutual friend. We met him during BP. And the translator for the Tigers at that time, she had known who we were. So she was, like, helped in the effort to try and explain. But he was, I mean, very nice to us.

But we told him like, oh, yeah, the barbecue. And he's like, yeah, that was my birthday. He said that was his birthday. So you knew what we were talking about. And then he told us that the dude in the background was former Orioles outfielder, Henry Yerudia. Yes. Okay.

In the background of it, he's like his best friend in Cuba. Yeah. So there's a very niche. Does Cuba like you? Do you guys have a lot of Cuban fans? That's a good question. I don't know. We don't know what the, what's the Twitter situation in Cuba?

Yeah. I'm not looking at the metrics, the Cuban metrics. We need to look at the analytics a little more closely. Some follower walk stuff. See, I mean, can we. See how many guys you got in Cuba? But yeah, so hopefully he comes back. How did you guys pick your favorite teams?

because the Yankees were there for you. Right. Oh, what? What does that mean? I don't want to say a bad decision. So if you guys don't know, Jake is a Orioles fan and Jordan's a Mariners fan. Yeah. Which is, no, it is definitely...

It's good because you guys have, like, balance of sadness. Yes. If one of you was a Yankees fan or was an Orioles fan, then it'd be like, ha-ha. It's like, you know, the hierarchy gets set and, you know... Right. Yeah. So, I mean, mine's weirder than his, and his has, like, an actual story. but I in high school

because I was like going all in on baseball and talking to Jake I was just like online a lot you can't say talking to Jake because that's his Twitter handle and it just make it confusing you're not allowed to put talking with and I was also online in chat rooms exactly exactly so

it's all probably talked on the old it's honestly very very possible so no but I was just I was just on you know reading all these different sites and I never weirdly now I mean I love that the Natswell and World Series but we grew up in the DC area and the Nats were lame.

Like they were lame early on. Not only did they suck. I mean, they were bad too. A lot of people were trying to be fans of both. Yeah. And so, you can be an or a real fan. And an national fan. It's like, no, you can't. They play 162 games. It was fucking impossible. And I was also just like the contrarian asshole kid that didn't want to roof the home teams. And not Washington home teams

are embarrassing anyway. He was, he was Rockets, Titans. Yeah. Mariners. Yeah, Mary. So. Holy smokes. But anyway, so the point is, but then it ended up on Seattle because I was just just reading a lot of lookout landing, which is Espination blog, Jeff Sullivan, who now works for the race.

Okay. And I was just reading about the Mariners every day. And I was like, and I love Felix Hernandez. He was my favorite pitcher. Still, I guess is. He's not, it's like a different person now. But so that, and I was like, all right, this is my team. I'm in. And so I've been a Mariners fan for about seven years. Do you ever, has it ever wavered? No. Not since it started. Because I, yeah, who am I going to get? Like, I was rooting for the Nats. And now I'm more into the Nats, but that's mostly just because of Wonsodoo. And Jake is a dorm.

Orioles fan? Yeah. Warren is a great way to put it. Yeah, you can't be an active Orioles fan. Not right now. No. They're hardly an active baseball team.

Yeah. You're a Bowie fan. They would have been relegated. Like, they should be reliant. All right. So let's start things off. Let's go to the beginning. Well, you have a good story here.

I've only heard the story. I've gone and Camden Yves. I've only heard the story 60,000 times. Yeah, let's hear it. So Nate McLeoddth hit the poll. That's the first thing that we should really bring up. Second thing. So my mom.

Nate McLeod's poll should have been your alternative name. Wow. That is so obscure. Why didn't we do that? Oh, man. Nate McLeod's poll. Okay, so my mom is from Baltimore. And my mom's mom is a huge Orioles fan.

And I was born the day, Ripkin tied Garrig. Okay. In 95. And my grandma left my mom while she was in labor with me and went to the game. She had tickets. And so at that point, it was like, you're done. That's it. Like, I'm screwed, right?

I'm an Orioles fan. I will always be one, and I'm cursed and locked in. Do you look good in orange? Does anyone? No, that's the hard thing. You know? Yeah. That's why they drafted Adley Rutchman because he was already in orange.

They weren't going to convince someone else. He already had the undershirts. Yeah. And Dylan Bundy's face matched the jersey sometimes. Dude, now it will. This is some rosy cheeks. Yeah, well, I don't like your broadcast. I told you this, not on air.

Masson just zooms in on every pitcher's face, like uncomfortably close. More than the average broadcast? I disagree. Yes, I think that's a good thing, you. And they just like, Dodgers. and they just like, Dodgers, watch a L.A. broadcast. It's so fucking Hollywood. It's like they think they're directing a TV show.

I love that. They're like, in the picture's face. And I'm like, yo, show me to catch your signs, please. I totally disagree with you because, like, 25 of the 30 broadcasts are the same. They're like the same interchangeable things. And so the ones that are weird and different and, like, zoom in on the pictures face or the Mariners having the insane slow-mo cam. Yeah, some recas have extra slomo.

Like, I want, I couldn't tell you the difference between the 20s. Twins and the Tigers broadcasts. Jake's about to get very mad at you. You're a strong opinion. I hate you. Jake and Jake battle you. No, I just think there's a little something that's missing because you're right. A lot of the broadcasts are similar.

Yeah. But I think there are some key differences. I mean, if you watch a game that's in Houston, the pitches look completely different. The off-speed pitches look ridiculously different. And I think it's kind of a problem with baseball is that if you were going to turn on a game on a different night, I think the broadcast looks completely different, and I think that's a problem in comparison to the NFL.

You turn on any NFL broadcast, you're getting the exact same thing. You might get an extra pile on cam, you might get a camera behind the quarterback or something, and I'm okay with that, but like, I want the same pitch camera camera. It's the camera angle. This is Jordan's one of the center foot camera angle, right, so some of them, they've gotten better.

There have been more that have turned to, right. Houston now is straight on. Right. Tampa Bay, straight on, Pittsburgh, Minnesota. There's a bunch. But they're, they're used to be there aren't as many more i know boston's is really bad isn't st louis the met's is weird metz is a weird one so when i make the breakdown videos i take both broadcasts right and then i i sync them so you you know so then i can go like you know optimum up what the fuckimal no i doctor whatever the one two one two test so i'm going back and forth and a lot of the broadcaster are fox like you know

and they have the same exact setup fox uniforms everything same scorebug and all that the met is so different that I can't alternate because it's like, ooh, dude, the Mets, the Mets have, they have one of my favorite, is a podcast with a baseball game going on with the back house.

The announcers are great, but like the actual camera angles, it's like tilted and weird. And then like Houston, I'll make some more friends in Houston. It's so dark. It's like we're watching a game from a 1970s basement. You're in an aquatic center.

It's so weird. It's like, put some lights on, please. Everything's like musky and it like smells like cigars and The sound quality is fine. Yeah. Did you guys hear about that?

I heard a lot. I heard no. I was in the Dominican Republic. I didn't. Literally heard many sounds. Yikes. Yikes. They signed a catcher.

What's that guy's name? Dustin Garneau. Garneau. Oh, Garneau. Watch for him to break out. Yeah. And watch for this quick break.

I can't believe you traded Max Dassey. Let's talk about the Nats. Dustin Garneau. All right. Thank you for sitting through that break. We're back. What we're talking about? Dustin Garne.

Astros are cheeses? Deep dive on his analytics. No way. We were told like, hey, don't only do Astro stuff. And I was like, oh, that'd be so boring. You don't want to do that. No, I don't. That's the thing is like you take no particular joy in, you take maybe joy in them getting caught.

But you don't take joy in having to spend all the time having to work on this. No, it was fun. But like the misconceptions about like us from, because there was some like guys on Astro's, Astros, like, radio or Houston Radio that, like, they're out for us. This is what he does. And it's like, no, man, like, we were going to be on Radio Row. We had credentials. Right, right.

A big company already. Oh, they think that, like, it made us. And it's like, no. And I hate, that's my biggest. Like, yes, a lot of people found out of us had no idea. I did a lot of radio. And it was, like, very good. But we were here, no matter what.

We've put in two years in. Aaron Boone, Aaron Boone cursing. Or way more, way more important. So this one also, like, is that. That's the whole speech. Yeah, yeah. I mean, you guys did. You guys did.

You got slamp poetry. I know he's like, I know he's like a little iffy on. No, he's not. He's, he loves it. They all, they all, if he. They all had to like, you know, the PR guy. We don't know. It's not really.

And then like, well, we'll sell the T-shirts. They made so much. Like, we made good money times that by 100. That's how much money the Yankees made. Right. By 100? $1,000. North of that.

Over 9,000. Yeah. My friend. Well, we made $5 million. I actually know that. You texted that to me. Yeah. Not on the shirts.

Yeah. Jake's... You want to tell the story? Jake is inside. He's the inside track. We had never met. You guys were very friendly. You had me on your show.

And I was like so excited because you guys do what we do. And I was like, I don't want any competitors with it. You know, there's only three of us, like I said. So let's all be friendly. Right. There's no competition here. And I was like, great. Like, I was so excited to go on your show and stuff.

And then we started texting. I'm like, this is cool, we're going to build up a rapport. And then I had your in my phone as Jake. And I'm texting who I think is Jake just like straight business stuff. Like our sales numbers for the year and in the response. Like I can pull up the conversation. It was just funny. And then when he showed it to me, I was like, I was like, well, man, I thought our segment went well, but he really likes you.

Well, then he was like telling me what games. Now you're in here, a cesspitist, Jake. I had to change your first name. That's fine. He was, you were telling me about what games you had an eye on. And you were like, yeah, don't worry. I'm recording the Iowa State, like Kansas State game. Because we were going to start doing college football stuff.

And it was like, all right. And it was the second time I did it to you. Yeah. Yeah. Because we were doing college football breakdowns. So, dude, I fucking, so I just, you were like, you texted me. Now, you know what it was? You know what it was?

You texted me about Hughes getting out of breath. Oh, that was a great video. And Jake and I had just recorded a podcast and I said, like, yo, I'm about to make a video about he was getting out of breath. So I made the video and then I get a text from Jake in my phone like, yo, that was awesome. And I'm like, think it's him commenting on that.

You're like, oh, also while you're here. As if Jake's going to like text me a compliment in my video. It's like, I go, I knew you'd like the whole story. And then we just kept talking.

You probably didn't even know that part. I didn't know was you. And then I sent a screenshot of like our money. And you're, you go, amazing. That's the fuck. That's like.

That's the thing. Hold on. My son looks so funny. You go, That's the fucking dream, dude. And you're like, wait, isn't it? And then I'm like telling him, like, yeah, I've been doing this to try and get it going on YouTube and stuff. Like, uh, well, look, can I just say, can I stop me here for Reagan?

Because when he showed this to me, I was like, conflict. I was like, I don't know. And like, look how much blue. I wouldn't fucking do that to anyone besides, like, a family or my girlfriend or Jake. Right. Right. I was like, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam. So do you, this is a safe space and you're, you're clearly not ashamed here.

Maybe you are. That's why you're talking about it. No. It is what it is. Did he play it wrong? Or he did as well as he could. No, no, no, no. I'm not trying to put him. That's not great, honey.

I think he did too. I was like, I don't know what the hell I would have said. Like, I don't know if I would have been like, hey, dumbass. Okay, because can I walk you through my phone process? In the end, it like, it waited like an hour and like you're didn't respond and that's fine. Because he was like, I was like getting into like the monthly money and shit. And I'm so excited because at this point, we had been living off $300.

each after rent for like a year and a half. We'd be living off nothing. So this is, when is this, August? So this is July was our first. You had a vulnerable but like excited time. Yes. So like any good news, we were texting each like, dude, we have a company. Like, you know, so like I was just sending updates. Right.

And then, so then it ends. And I go, I'm recording Nebraska versus Alabama. And then, because we were recording like college football. This dude, I barely knows just telling me about his day. John Boy really likes me. Dude, like, you probably thought I was such a fucking,

like, if someone did this to me in earnest, I would have been, like, done with them. I would have been like, that guy sucks. When you told me about the money, like, my first thought was like, that's a weird flex, but, like, you do you. Like, you're getting money.

That's awesome. Like, I'm happy for you. I would have never done. Like, I'm so shy about that shit. Well, no, that was the other thing. It was like, it made sense from the standpoint of, like, yeah I would be excited too like we've been following we're like holy shit

John boys blowing up this is awesome but I was like what what? Like clearly it was not meant so yeah you tell me your tax returns to that too yeah we might have got there so then I go 20 minutes later and I go the two Iwas are going to overtime because we're supposed to be we're supposed to be working this and I go I've got it recorded and then like okay so then we're 30 minutes later

and you're not responding sure like what the fuck yeah right and I go are you around your comp it's gonna take a while to send And then I think you like DM'd me on Twitter or something because I wasn't responding to your test. I was like, dude, fucking we're supposed to be working these games. He's getting pissed off at me. He's getting mad at me while revealing our company's deepest, darkest secrets to you guys. Yeah.

And I'm like, you finally respond. You go, bruh, I think you've been texting the wrong jakes again. Again. You go, this. And I said, are you kidding me? Dude, I'm changing your name or my brain. And it hasn't happened again. I changed his name,

the Saspibus Jake. That's great. And then, so, yeah. Like, Jake's on the inside of the business. Yeah, anybody trying to take down John Boy Media, let me know. Oh, yeah. I got the dirt. Jake Mintz knows more than Jake's really.

You could have had the scoop that they were on the Alabama Iowa game. Yeah. You could have broke that. Yeah. That might make a video about the Iowa soon. Source. Person familiar with the situation. That was a weird time because that was like another business deal that came away,

like to do, like, to do, like, college football stuff. like it was like let's not fuck this up so I was like very actively like I'm recording this you record this do that and then I was like I'm so stupid oh I'm I'm I uh was that therapeutic to talk yeah I think that had to happen I think it helped me funny I had to happen I uh growing up my friends would always be like it's so weird that you don't smoke weed Jimmy because you're the biggest stoner I've ever met and I was like okay and then it's like I just do dumb shit like that like I've filled up my I've gone to a gas station walked in give 20 bucks for gas got my car drove away without out my tank five times a moment.

You know, they make Adderall for that. All five times for this week. I mean, I'm prescribed it. Okay, cool. Drop some on the ground. Just casually, just drop some. People in college would ask me for, people in college would ask me for Adderall all the time. They were like, oh, like, yo, do you want to do Adderall?

I'm like, if I do Adderall, like, I'm going to want to go to the library. That's what I was like in college. Like that, I didn't ever overused it. Like, it's just for me, like, that's to get my work done. I didn't do recreationally. You guys are... Yeah, I almost... We were introduced to Adderall.

How loud are we talking with these headphones are? The Nationals. The Bowie Bay Sox. No, Adderall is like a real drug. So this podcast got interesting. Adderall changed my life. Well, that's actually a big problem in baseball right now. Yeah.

You guys, dude, Chris Davis came off it. I know. I forgot out of swinging. Chris Davis's life. Dude, so when I played in college, like, I need... Like, it did help me. Like, for sure. Like, 100,000.

makes your brain be better. You just focus. Yeah. So, yeah. Your brain is important, too. Well, yeah. Well. Did you guys do your homework?

College? I didn't have a major that required homework. Oh, okay. I was a history majors. You write a 10-page paper at the end of the... Me too. At the end of the semester. American history from the, from like the Civil War to like the age of expansion.

You're doing any Civil War breakdowns? We have a history podcast. I did know that. Yeah. But there's not a lot of footage. That's a problem. On YouTube? Oh, no, to break down?

Civil War, yeah, that's the thing. Yeah. You can't. Not a ton of content back then. Like the Mets broadcast. You just go to a picture and like, look at these hifters. There's not as much to decipher. Yeah.

You just bring up a picture of Strasbourg. What do you study? Well, no, I'm hoping that me and Jordan have the same major because we need all the symmetry to link up here. Sexual education. Sexual education? Major in sex ed? No.

Oh, he just needed to learn a couple things. Yeah. I still don't really get what's happening down there. I was business marketing. Oh, boom. Sorry. No. There's the reason they're wearing a suit.

Yeah. No. No. This is my signature look. Oh, I didn't know that. Do you guys? Can you open that suitcase? Grab some shirts.

You grab some, yeah. Roosevelt. Just grab those two. Is that a human head? Yeah. I actually almost brought my mannequin hand and I thought like I can't do that. Yeah. That's an event.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, they go. Yeah, there's like went nuts. That's yours. That's yours. There might be two in there. Are there two in there or one?

These are something. Yeah, these are sponsored by the Roosevelt. We just gave one to Lindsay Adler, so maybe we only have one. No, we have a lot. Whoa. What is this? That's slimer, right? I don't know what that is.

So you guys can both wear that like your conjoined. Yeah. What is that? Oh, okay. This is relevant. Great. We love Reloen. I watched Ghostbusters on the plane yesterday for the first time of my life.

I've never seen it. The OG Ghostbusters? It was not worth the time. Yeah, I never seen it. It's very 80s. Yeah. It's basically Bill Murray making up a ghost thing

so that he can hit on women weirdly. It was an odd video. Use code Johnboi. You use code Johnbino, 20% off. The Roosevelt. They sent us here. Should we, let's do like commercial and we'll deep dive into baseball.

Yeah, let's talk about actual baseball. Wait, let him play the commercial song. Yeah, come on. Oh, you have? Do you have a good ad song? Yeah, we already did it. We now bring in our next guest, Jack Johnson. Jack, thank you for that musical intro.

We really appreciate it. Reduce, Reuse, recycle. And we first moved in together. Thanks guys for coming on the pod. This was fun. This was really fun. What's going to happen this off season? What do you guys like?

No, it's not. No, strike that, reverse it. What the fuck are the Mariners doing? Oh, really? Do they do this? He's kind of a Mariners hater. No, I'm not. No, no, no, no, no.

No, no. You're a big hater. No, no, no, no. I think it's the most crisp broadcast. Why are you punched them down? No. Oh, no, Mariners' broadcasts are great. It's awesome.

It's fantastic. But. Don't bat paddle. Send it at DePoto. No, my Mariners thing is a genuine question that someone on YouTube gets mad at me. And it's like, the Mariners seem to always not know if they're trying to win now or win in five years. Right. And I, and I, what's their plan?

That was absolutely a problem until last year. And then it was like, okay, the plan is to trade everybody. And we're going to win in two years. And now they have a good farm system. Two years? They have, or, yeah. 20, 21. Like that's what DePoto has.

Chai 1 has like, like they have actual dudes. Like they're all coming up together. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The thing is that he still has to be right about the players. But the players are there, right? I don't know if they're all going to be good. I don't know if Justice Sheffield's going to be good. He's not.

Yeah, okay. So. But he's going to be a good fifth or bullpen guy. I like their, I like their field guys. What is it? Kalanick and there's. Well, they've got Kellio, Kyle Lewis's baby something. Kyle Lewis. Shed Long is the man.

Shed Long. Like, they. Shed Long. From the Yankees. Yankee legend, Shed Long. Technically. Jake, Jake beefed with, Jake beefed with Shed on Twitter once. Wait, really?

For those, wait, for the 10 minutes he was a Yankee? And Jake was, Jake was trying to, Jake had the perfect response to Shed, but Shed never replied again. Because Jake was going to drop a, more like Shed wrong. Yeah. Gotcha. That sounds like you lost. Why were you beefing with you? No, there was one of, it was like the Little League baseball team that lost, but they still like.

They high-fived a kid after you gave up the hall round. And Jen was like, don't do that. We need to be. compared to to the kids how to win Did Shed really have a tweet? You know what you missed? The fact that there's still kids.

See, hold on. Teach him to be good human beings, Shed. We're all the way on your side on this. I'm surprised that Shed had that tick. Hey, I'm a digger. History major. I like research. Jumbo, hit the books.

But that potentially bad opinion aside, I love Shed Long and I think he's great. And he's having fun on the internet and I like that. I like guys that tweet, whether I agree with him or not, like grow the game. Right. His Twitter is shlong.

This is another thing. It's too easy sometimes. The point you're making is actually one that I try. I think that we, and as you guys, I'm sure, have talked to players about, is that like the bar is so low. You have to do so little to be interesting on social media. Like, if you literally, if you're like a good major leaguer

and you post, like, had some delicious Captain Crunch this morning, like, this is the funniest thing I've ever seen. Dude, I could go on a whole. Athlete humor is, I mean, the bar is so low. It's fine, I'm fine with that. Mike, comparison is church humor. I can't relate to that. If you go to, like a Sunday mess, I'm not a big.

I went to church yesterday morning, actually, swear to God. But just think of the, just think of the image, like the guy's up there and he's like, hope everyone's being happy and healthy and hope that God's overlooking the Green Bay Packers this weekend. And it's like, is he hilarious or what? I literally was in Milwaukee yesterday morning, and that happened to me. That's what I'm the same. No, Joe, you've got to come to our church. It's pretty fun.

He's funny. He's funny. You hear that at the bar last night, and George Brett's like, get out of here. So Shlong 895, it was like, even after the ESPN said, even after the home run, these players are all about sportsmanship. Okay, but that. And Shed Long responded, that's not sportsmanship, L.O.L. So we teach in the kids it's okay to lose and get beat, shaking my head. And it's like, yes, at 10, we are teaching them that.

Get to high school, get to AAU. We did a whole thing on our show about this. Totally agree with you. Let's be a society first. We'll worry about having good baseball players. Hot takes. Also, it's like, happy kids of the League World Series. Suck.

And it's like, that's fine. They're so happy to be there. They are having fun giving up the home runs because they're on television. That's all that matters. Wasn't that kid from New Hampshire? I was like, okay, he's from New Hampshire. Not going to be a big leaker. Sorry.

Sorry, Grant Levine, Rocky's prospect. Got bad news. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was also like a tiny little kid. Yeah, children and children. I coached your 12-view team in the Oregon's last year, and it was like, that's a terrible. You can't get.

I know, look at that. He's asking for it. What, if you're not ruined for the Orioles. No, we're still talking Mariners. Listen, here's the thing. Let me just say, just quickly because I know no one really cares about the Mariners. Come on. No, because, like, I will say I am a depotal defender

because I do think that, like, there is a plan now, and, like, it sucks. to be bad, but they actually have guys in place. Versus, and I'm not, like, there are other bad teams who you can't even see the goodness. It's so far into the future. You can't even visualize it.

Yeah, yeah. Talking about his soul. Yeah, you were going to segue us to the Orioles. It still has to work. Honestly, that's the Tigers and the Giants, in my opinion, a half level below the Orioles. The Tigers are so bad. But, wait, staying on Seattle for a little bit.

I'm just optimistic. I like that, but I like that you agree that there was, like, a meddling area. Oh, 100%. They were going back. And that's why last year was like, all right, we're doing this. We're trading everybody. That's great.

If I was depoto, so you say it? Yeah. I always think I'm going to say it wrong. Same with Scott surveys. Service. Service. I always, all the names. How do you say depoto wrong?

I was going to say depito. That's hilarious. Or depotee. My little brother once said dipido, which is definitely wrong. Dippado. Anyway, if he was in your fantasy baseball league, you would fucking hate him. I know. Yeah.

Do you? That guy, that guy sucks. Yeah. It's a trade. Come on, you're a trade? Oh, my God. It's Thanksgiving at 4 p.m. But wouldn't you rather him?

He's doing shit. Also, he's made a lot of trades with the Yankees, so you're welcome. You want to trade your holds guy for our holds? Yeah, are you guys excited about Juan Thin? Oh, he's going to be good. I am. Think about the puns. You lost out of the puns, dude.

He somehow got better. Yeah, we're just trading you all the good names. Shedlong, Juan Fenn. I can't believe you take ownership of Shedlong. He was, come on. Put him in Monument Park. He got really excited. He got his stripes.

He earned his stripes. He earned his stripes. Did he? I like Josh Stowers. For getting rid of Sunny Gray. How can I earn my stripes, guys? Oh, yeah. I don't...

Interesting. You need to stop booing Tashara. I don't really hate to share her as much. Do you know that Babe Ruth's dad was... Babreuth's dad was born in Centerfield. No, Babe Ruth's dad died in Center Field of Camden Yards. Did you know that? Why was he there?

Because he owned a bar that was in where Center Field is of Camden Yards. And that's where he died. Yeah, you got in a fight and, uh, you got dead. All right. Oh, yeah. That's so cool. He was a terrible dad, and he sent Babe Ruth to an orphanage when he was seven years old because he couldn't take care of him. Recipe.

Babe Ruth gone too soon. Yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. It was like 50-something. Yeah. I miss you, babe. That one video of him is so sad. It actually is really sad.

That is that video. Oh, live reenactment. What time of the Yankee. Isn't it crazy that you can hear Babe Ruth's voice in a thing? Right. That was me. No. Like, John Boy.

Oh. Editing videos again. Adding in that fake noise No way he did that. We went down a fake stone or black hole the other day that was like, how did they record audio on tape? No, that's my biggest question. Like when people are like,

what's the next season of the history show I wanted to do inventions? And it's like, who thought, hey, you know how we're talking out loud? What if we put that on this piece of tape? Bro, didn't they use pottery first? Don't, I don't know. They like, you could record, like, using a little

or something? Someone smart enough was like, yeah, that will work. Yeah, you're smart. You're on to something, John. Steve Jobs is in the corner. I got this. Yeah. I mean, at the same time,

I don't know how the hell any of this shit works. Right? Right. Yeah. How does anything work? So, do you build a building this size?

I think about that all the time. Underpaid labor. I'm like, I'm like, you know what I think with that? With that. I think, when did they do that?

Underpaid labor, most of history. Or like roads? Do you everything about that? Dude, if I see a fucking bridge, I'm lost for 10 minutes. What?

You know, they name the GW bridge. That because George Washington found it? They're like, oh man. He found the bridge? Yeah, he was going up the Hudson. He was like, whoa. Whoa.

My great grandpa died on the George Washington Bridge. Like, baby. Really? Yeah, everybody helped build it. Why isn't the bridge named after him? Was your great grandpa named John Boy? No, no, no, no, no, no. It was Mr. John Boy.

Okay. And he didn't even help build it. He was just a cop that worked at the bridge. That was the dumbest thing anybody said on this. No, no, no, no. No, no. Visits I've been here. and that just hit me in a really deep spurred of level.

No, it's Mr. John. I've wanted to secretly name my unborn son, Adrian, because of Adrian Beltray. Really? Yeah. So you've really thought about that. Yeah, I have a Mariners, Adrian Beltaire Shurzee. Okay, that's a good one. When you think Adrian Belchre, what do you think?

Just like, bam. The head rubbing. I think of him, no, I think of a home run on one knee. I think of him as testicles rip it in half. I can't help. Nope. That just happened. Nope.

That's McHanager. The Mariners, too. Yeah. Imagine, like, playing third base without a cup on. Like, what a fuck are you doing? Just your hands. Dude, a ton of dudes don't wear cups. A ton.

Jake never wore cup. Yeah. Which is crazy. Didn't feel right down there. Yeah. Oh, poor McChanager. Did you play? I mean, like, not really.

We should face off. I was good. I was young good. Like, I was, no joke. Number one pick in the town throughout literally. Like, the Robert's stock of Connecticut. Middlebury, bro. In his town of 3,000.

Like, there was probably 30 kids. No, but it was the number one pick, dude. Just because you weren't the number one pick. Don't try to put it down. This kid owns a baseball club. How many kids your age played in the league? Dude, we had a full Little League league. Like, I don't know.

Why you got to put me down like that, fam? What was your name? Scouting report. Scouting report. Good but dumb. Third base. Third base. I wanted to play third base.

Scott Brocious, bare hand. Bellington. We all wanted to be Scott. Got thrown at shortstop, obviously. Little League, if you have eye hand, they're going to try to put you out there. Developed into a center fielder. Oh, wow. They're going to center. You must have to get some good speed. I had

so much. You refused to wear a cup. They're like, all right, go on the outfield. Center. Center field is like my baseball heaven. Like, you're just out there. And you're in charge. Any ball's mine. Yeah, daddy's home. We've got outfielers. Okay, so obviously, like, Little League stories kind of suck. So we played freshman baseball together. I disagree the Little League sort of sucks. So please continue.

Depends on the story. Yeah. So Jake's usually. I think, I think this is our best one. and now that people are knowing us, it's pretty funny. So I'm in center, Jimmy's in right, ball in the gap. This is a good story. Ball in the Gap. So I'm going for it. And I brought some theatrics to the game.

I wasn't scared to throw an extra. Like, I wasn't scared to slow down a step. He was a cure. He was a die. He was a hot dog. I suck. So ball in the gap. I go for it.

Lay out. Do not catch it. Okay, you miss it. But what happens is somehow, I think I stopped it with my glove and my body was facing the infield. So the balls are. on the ground, my body's facing the infield, umpires by second

base. So I balls on the ground, I look at Jimmy, Jimmy looks at me, and I go, fuck it. So I pick up the ball and pretend I catch it. And the umpire just looks at me and goes, no, that's not a catch. Jimmy hits the ground laughing. He cannot believe

I tried to sell that. It was like, so clear. He like looked for the ball. And I was just looking at him and he just goes, I mean, in his bare hand. And the ump just went, No catch. Basically, the ump and Jimmy were laughing at me at the same time. Go-Ump's like, get that weak shit out of you.

That was my highlight reel. No, I... My highlight reel was running in from left field to yell at the home plate umpire in like a sarcastic dick. Oh, yeah. Oh, you were like a... I was in left field and I was in left field and we were playing this game and a kid hit a ball and it hit... I don't even think it was the warning track. I think there was like a spot.

track. It was like a walking path. Yeah, there was some piece of concrete in the outfield, and it hit that and bounced over the fence. And so throw my hands up. And the hump goes, home run. And the kid's celebrating. And I'm like, and I just run up. I was like, I was a little punk bitch. A little bit.

When I was a kid, I was really mean to. I didn't respect adults that didn't respect kids. Like, if they thought they were better, I just was an asshole. A lot of fights with teachers. But I was like, do you think I was fucking celebrating his home run? Why would I put my hands up, Blue? Like, are you dumb? Are you a dumb person?

Did you get thrown? No, no, no, no. But, uh, because he knew he's wrong. Right. But he kept it. And then, like, I told that kid, like, I just want you know you didn't hit a home run. Like, I want to search the 2003 freshman year Bethel, Connecticut high school roster and, like, find the game log and, like, you didn't. And, like, find the game log and, like, you didn't hit that home run.

That game log is gone. I know. I know you tell people I hit a home run freshman year over the fence. I know you tell people that. And, like, you didn't. You hate that. Yeah. And like, I need to find that kid.

You might want to let that go. No. Some things you got to let just do. That's a great hell to die on. But are you more mad at the player or the ump? The ump. That game was also, do you remember this game?

This is so stupid. No one cares about this. But the- Thanks for having us on to tell us all your... You guys took the cheese. So their kid's scorekeeper had the score wrong and said they won. Just wanted to tell that. Wow, this goes way deeper.

No, no. So the kid on their team was keeping score. And it was just like a freshman. Like, we let the 14-year-old keep score. So when we end the game, And we were like, we won by one. And they're like, no, we tied. And they thought we, do you remember this?

Yeah. And they thought we tied. And it was like this big to do. Amazing. And then they were like, can we see your scorecard? And the little kid just did it wrong. So they thought we were going to extra earnings. We were like, we won.

Games over. And that home run didn't count. Wow. Did you file protest with the league? Fuck that team. Damn. All right. I love the idea of you guys just walking around the lobby.

Like going up to like George Brett. Oh, yeah. Hey, can you come on our show so we can tell you stories about our 14-year-old baseball games. from our highlights before we got cut because we sucked. Yeah. It's good stuff. It is good stuff. Did you dream up when you were growing up of wanting to play in Bristol in the Little League?

Reginals? Because I did that twice, so you can suck it. Dang. Wow. We can do little league stories. We can get that lame. If you want to get that lame. Okay.

We can get that lame. Did you sideline when you were young? I was on the front page of the Bristol Times. Did you sideline when you were a kid? If you sidewined it as a young youth, I knew I was bad from the jump. I tore my UCL. I'm walking around with a tourney sale. I'm getting T.J.

When did you tear it? So I pitch in college. No, we're talking little league. We don't care about your college pitching. It's a little league podcast. Why did you sign wide when you were in Little League? Because I couldn't get outs from up here. Because I wasn't good enough.

You're desperate. You're sick. I was good from now here. I wasn't like as low as I am like when I was in college. How many coaches were like Jake? My dad, my dad. You're so dumb. Yeah.

Like you, you're an idiot. I ended up looking like Joe Smith. In college, I was, like, low, like, whippy. And then I was pitching in a men's league in Westchester a month after I graduated at college. And I was like, whoa, that's it. We'll see you later. Yeah. If you have an extra UCL.

What was your college? I know that you still, like, watch them on the laptop. I do all the time. Way too hard. I played Division III baseball at Wash U and St. Louis. Wash you? Washington University. Washington.

In San Luis. That's a smart school. Yeah. You're smart. I don't know. Fuck you. I know. Smart?

You played impressive Little League games? You want to know something secret? I'm done with you. Smarter than me. Yeah? Maybe like a less acclaimed university. Just the glasses? No, no, no.

That's going a long way. My vision's fine. Jordan has like legitimately genius recall. But that's not smart. You just got a good memory? Because I have that. Yeah, I know. Clearly.

You just told us you're about your fucking 2003 libel. That's a deep scar. Exactly. That's true. Jordan, who is the best player this year on the Fort Myers Miracle? Oh, no. You remember when that kid said Taylor Jalowski is my favorite player?

Give me three players from that team. Trevor Larnick was on that team. Tom Hackmer was on that team. Ben Rortved was on that team. What? Catching prospect. What team were you talking about? Catching prospect.

High A twins. Did you change your name too? Oh, he's more of an idiot savant with like. And like in 2011, if there was an NBA player, Jake, no matter who could tell you what college you went to. I think you've kind of dipped out of it. Michael, Michael Ruffin.

I got a... Michael Ruffin. God, he was good. It looked like... Ohio State, I don't know. I don't know. No, I used... So, I used to...

I used to do franchise modes of video games, so I'd do the fantasy draft, so I'd learn them pretty good. I see. Either you guys, Upa guys, out of the park baseball? I... Every time I try, I just like... Losers.

You're like, I am not this pathetic. No, no, no. I'm just joking. Upa. Honestly, I want to be that pathetic, and I just, like, don't have the patience for it. I played a lot of stratomatic. Like, I spend so much time looking at the...

Like, I don't... Rare that I feel like the coolest guy at the table. I don't know. I can't play a lot at the strand of that. I think the coolest guy's Bill. Yes. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Okay. Producer Bill's winning. Um, I don't want to be rude here, but can we wrap this up so we can go watch Scott Boris? One final question for a little. There hasn't really been a point of conversation for a while. No. Can I ask one question?

Yeah. Uh, one to ten, if the Yankees don't sign Garrickle, how mad will you be? Oh. No. I'll be mad at myself for buying into it because for like up until two weeks ago. I was like, no chance. No chance. One of ten.

Mad, probably like a, mad probably a five. Because like Patrick. Corbyn, you were probably like a one and a half. No, it's not even mad because the Yankees are doing

everything they can to get him. So I think, so I say that you're nobody. You're not mad, you're just disappointed. No, just kind of like mad at Cole for like,

what the fuck would you go to the angels over the Yankees if the money's the same? You're a loser. Like, Otani 2.0? For me, for me, there'd be a six or seven.

but I think the only way they're getting beat at this point is if someone gives him a dumb offer. Right. Like if the angels or Dodgers go like nine or ten years at like 35 a piece. Oh my God, that's amazing. That'd be fucking crazy. And so then I'll be mad.

They just kind of beat the Strasbourg deal by like one year and like 20 million bucks. I think Arty Marino ups on that. So what if, oh, okay. But then you're going to say like, oh, if the angels get 30 million more, you're going to say what are you going to do? I think we're going to go. How many times you get?

Whatever. Okay, all right, it's fine. Okay. How much? We'll do. Two minutes of serious baseball talk on the end of the... I don't think he's getting 300. I think it's going to be like 8, like 290.

Let's do a guess. Should we do a gentleman's bet on? What was Strasbourg's? Strasbourg got 2.45. 7-2-45. 7-2-45. 8-2-70. I think high in that not 3-300.

9-305. 8-305. 8-305? What the fuck? 8-287. Yeah, I think I'm going 8-2-95. Okay. All right. We're locked in.

I think 9th year. I think we see a ninth year. Where's John Heyman? John, it's crazy. Don't. Don't. No, he's a friend of the family. Oh, I know.

He's a... Well, that's Mumble Rap. We just heard. Humble Rap. Thank you. They're coming. I have a question I want to ask you guys about Cole, but, like, I want to do it on my phone. Okay.

Okay. Can you... Yeah, double up. We can double up. Okay. And then I'm going to get the outro music set up. So we'll see Boris talk some weird shit. We should talk baseball sometime.

Maybe. Like, this was fun, but... Sideway. Okay. What would you give up in your own lives for Gary Cole? So money's the same. I'm just going to go. Okay. No beer for the entirety of the contract. Nine years. You can't drink any beer. That'd be a blessing. You're good with that. Okay. Great. You do that in a heartbeat. No cheese on anything for the entirety of the nine year contract.

See, I did this for two years. I did no beer, no cheese for like, 2018. So I can do that. My mom would be pissed. You'd be like, you don't eat anything now. The rest of your life is identical. You cannot wear shoes anywhere. I just have to move back to the beach. I just moved to Manhattan, so it's just like, okay, I've got to move back to the beach. But you would do that. Do I have to pick all three?

No, I wouldn't do that. No, no, okay, I would do the beer. We're finding one. Yeah, beer would be okay. It would be great. Nine years. Maybe I'd get in shape. Beer would be okay.

And same with cheese. Yeah, I'd be like, cool. If he started sucking, though, I'd like, like. I think you're being corny, but I don't think you're being real about cheese. Okay, ready. The only thing I'd have to give up is pizza. Nine years? Hold on here's another one.

Couldn't eat pizza anymore. Sandwiches? I don't put cheese on my sandwiches. What? I don't want to go down a sandwich dive. Please. I cut you. Guys, let's move away from the food.

Okay, ready? Please continue. You do not get to watch Aaron Judge at Bats for however long. No, I wouldn't give that up. That's just stupid. He's still there. My sense, you don't get to watch. My sensibilities wouldn't allow that.

Judge is up. I'm saying, you just, you're not allowed. It's rude to judge. You're not allowed to watch any non- Yankees games until the post. season. That would suck with my career. I know. I did that for a while. Brett Gardner is permanently on the roster until he's 45.

That's a drink. Yeah, that's sign me out. It has to play. He's taking at least 100. I thought we're saying bad things. A hundred played appearances? No, we're saying negative things. Yeah, they're just like, you just keep that mindset going for the Yankees nonstop. You're not allowed to attend a Yankees game in person for the entirety of that contract. Nine years, Garrickal. He's on your team. I do that. I do that. You can't go.

I only went to three last year. Yeah, but you went to three. Yeah. The difference is three and zero. I left one early. Because the baseball's boring. Would you do that, Jake? No.

No. You would not do that. So you would say, I wouldn't do that either. No. We're fine in the law here. No, you would, you don't want Gary Cole. I do the beer.

I do the no shoes. I could be the no shoes guy. Okay. You got weak feet. You wouldn't be able to do it. I think it'd get tough pretty quick. Okay. Congrats.

Thank you. Thank you. All right. All right. We learned a lot. Outro, outro music. What would you give up for an Orioles World Series? Most things?

Like what's, what is like the deepest, maybe darkest thing that you could say? Would you kill someone? No, I would not. I would not do anything. In a relevant person. No, no, no, no. I would not do anything immoral. I would do something like disgusting.

Right. Like I would like that you could push Jake pretty far. Yeah. Like I think could get more gross. You or me. Jake lives gross. I don't want to do Fear Factor, man. Jake lives with no shoes for nine years.

Yeah, like we could do that, but is that like a game? Play them out. Play them out. The wrap it up box. Thank you guys. I want to thank my mom. I want to thank the producers on this great show for everything they've done. Thanks, Bill.

Jesus Christ. I want to thank Babe Ruth. It was Jewish first. So I'm saying, Jake Sachs. You guys are great. Now I got this amazing. I'm going to walk into this past conference.