Talking Shit with a Yank & a Brit - 24. Jerk Circled

Episode Date: September 7, 2023

This week we've got a juicy AITA update, terrible first date stories, dodgy relationship tales and all topped off with some toxic masculinity tid-bits!Send your stories to [e-mail], or DM @TSYBPOD on Twitter, Instagram or TikTok!

and we're back back again to all your friends hi everyone this is talking shit with the yank everyone this is talking shit with the yank and the brit yay i told that you knew i was really hesitant to do the intro you nailed it well done thank you hello everybody as you heard this is talking shit with the yank and a brit i'm kate and here with jemma and we're gonna talk to you about some shit and stuff and stuff and shit and things because that's what we do here. And if you're new here, then thank you for joining us on this wonderful journey that we're on. And if you're a regular listener, then it's so good to have you back again. I don't know why I was doing a southern accent. I liked it though I I just you do accents so well and

you still haven't really kind of well I mean I think you've you've given us little breadcrumbs of your different accent ability but you haven't I haven't been able to be like okay do Scouser and now do Babe Farmer and then do you know, the only way is Essex. Well, one day we'll do that. Maybe I could read some of the tales we've got today in different accents for you. Hey, I like that. Do that. I'll do

that then. That makes me think of that clip I sent you though a while ago where it was like a, I think it was like blind date spoof or love is blind spoof where you can't see the person. And the woman's like, I love British guys. And then it's all these guys with different British accents. And the woman's like, oh, God. She was thinking like Hugh Grant British.

And that is not what all of Britain sounds like. No, not at all. Sorry to disappoint anyone who thinks that we all talk incredibly posh and a stuttering, you know, nervous, charming English people. Well, and, you know, I guess the stereotype you guys have for Americans is kind of some of the more extreme versions too, right? Yeah. I think only probably one person ever said that they liked my accent over there. And I was like, why?

Ew. Ew. Why? So this is my go-to. I always do. California. That is some impressive vocal fry you have going on there. I just sound like I'm from the ring.

So we've got a juicy little update from last week's Am I the Arsehole? You know you are, baby. Beautiful. So just to refresh your memories, it was Am I the Arsehole for telling my fiance that if he expects me to contribute 50-50, we have to make some serious life changes. me to contribute 50-50. We have to make some serious life changes. We discussed the possibility of him having a gambling

problem or being jerk-circled into... Circle-jerked. Circle-jerked. Anyway, an update's been posted and I think we need to share I agree

Hi everyone This got way bigger than intended so I figured a follow up was owed So last time I posted was on Monday Monday as a whole was spent just sorting out what I felt what to do next There was a lot of silence and a lot of anger and a lot of Reddit advice

some of which I found very insightful, some of which less so. Also, some people think I made this up as part of a viral marketing sponsorship between Buffalo Wild Wings, Audi and Zillow, which honestly would solve the money problems if true. But alas, it's not the case. On Tuesday, after I got home from work, I sort of just walked up to him on the... Elliptical? Yep. I was like, how do I pronounce that word? Weirdly remember that because it's like, oh, he's just on the elliptical. And she's like, now's a good time.

Okay. And explained as calmly as I could that I had questions. And if he actually wanted to marry me, he needed to be willing to answer them. I asked if he thought I was a gold digger, yes or no. He said yes. I ain't saying she a gold digger. She ain't messing with no broke. No broke, but broke. I told him that I wasn't willing to be in a relationship where I have to prove myself by sacrificing any sort of stability that led to a bit of a screaming match and eventually a confession.

So, it turns out we can't afford anything we have right now. We are in serious credit card debt. we have right now. We are in serious credit card debt. The cars are both on the verge of being repossessed and I did not know about any of this. He's been cutting corners on actual necessities, including psychiatric medication. That in combination with some comments from his family led to some pretty dark places. My fiance had a full breakdown and apologized for calling me a gold digger, which was nice to hear, but this whole thing had me pretty dark places. My fiance had a full breakdown and apologized for calling me a gold digger, which was nice to hear, but this whole thing had me pretty shaken up. I went to stay with a friend for a bit. Yesterday, my fiance and I did in fact go out to BMW and get, oh sorry,

no, to BWW, which is Buffalo Wild Wings, if wondering to get the two for one boneless we talked a lot I'm still writing Fiance for now and I really hope we can work through all of this we talked about how to sell the cars I don't particularly have a choice at this point and about my income his income and the sort of life we want to have

if we do stay together we'll be changing how we live a lot we need to get out of debt we need to get on our feet I know some people are going to say that I'm being dumb for not immediately dropping all contact and giving up on the relationship, but I can't do that. I can't look at the guy I love who went off his meds to try and make a good life for me and think he's not worth sticking around for, or at least try. I don't know what the future looks like at all anymore, and the wedding is very much postponed at the moment.

Sorry this wasn't more of a fun update. I love being right. While we probably didn't specifically say what the actual truth was i think we both definitely felt like there was something going on that he wasn't being honest about um i think i thought he was maybe doing this really avoidant passive aggressive thing to get her to like call off the engagement break up with him yeah um and maybe there was still some of that too i don't know but like definitely he was there was something there that he was hiding that was driving this yeah and honestly it's not a surprise uh given kind of how he approached her and what

he said he needed that it's just a ton of debt um because i think you said, Gemma, maybe like is something going on with his job that he lost it or like something with money. But I think it was pretty clear just based on not knowing anything about these people except for what was written in the post that he was trying to resolve an issue without having to confess that he fucked up in some way. I also think it's funny that they went to buffalo wild wings to get the meal deal and discussed their relationship problems it's very romantic in a way yeah i guess it seems to be a lot of people have this problem where they live above their means because you can get everything on credit these days people are like oh i just got a really nice car and just pay it off and it's like well guys you can't actually afford it yeah so you should be doing it i see that a lot in my line of work as like kind of a factor in maybe separation for

you know the cases i have where people are getting divorced um just and like some secrecy around spending and stuff like that. It happens a lot in the fraud world as well, actually. Oh, I bet. Because people buy cars they can't afford or they could afford it and then they lose their job. So they manufacture their car getting stolen or something like that. But you always figure them out, don't you, Gemma? I always catch those bad guys that's what i do uh well so we don't often i think follow up on those but that one i became aware of

quickly because one of our listeners shared um thank you with us hey matt uh that there was an update kind of like really quickly after, I think, our episode published. So we thought it was important to continue that saga. That's what we do. We live to serve, you know? Yeah. Speaking of kind of relationship issues and, you know, maybe poor communication and stuff, I think we thought it would be fun to kind of do a little bit of a, you know, maybe poor communication and stuff. I think we thought it would be fun to kind of do a little bit of a, you know, revisit of some of the conversations we've had in the past

about love and dating and kind of also tying it in with a little bit about, you know, toxic masculinity and all of that. But let me just, I think it probably would be important to say that like women also can contribute to really horrible dynamics in relationships too. It's not always men. And there will be examples of such. Oh, okay. I'm excited to hear. I also, you know, I think I'm comfortable admitting that I too have probably committed some cardinal sins in relationships of just being you know kind of horrible or not

forthcoming or poor communicator and stuff so you know we're we're not perfect I think you and I can recognize that because we're very very self-aware and mature and insightful beings at our age but it's taken some time to get there Kate hasn't it yeah it's a learning process you don't reach perfection like this just you're not hasn't it? Yeah, it's a learning process. You don't reach perfection like this. You're not born with it. No. Maybe it's Maybelline. Maybe it's Maybelline.

So I know you have something you want to share with me. I'll let you go first. Yeah, so I just came across this article is, again, based on Reddit, because I just live on Reddit, because that's what I do in my spare time. Someone asked, what's something that happened on a first date that made you decide against a second

date? And lo and behold, some of them are fucking hilarious. So, I'll have to read some for you. Maybe to us, but not to the people experiencing it. Not to the people, no. Okay. So, number one.

He used his pocket knife to cut me a slice of cake and later scraped some dirt clumps off his shoe with the same knife. Oh. I asked him if he'd ever cleaned his knife, and he replied, no, why? It gets nice and seasoned that way. Adds to the flavour. He also confessed to me that he was madly in love with me the same day. We had just met.

Oh, no, that wasn't the first time he met you, baby. Might have been the first time you met him. He's been watching you for a while with his mud clump knife. It makes me think of poop knife. We really are doing a revisited episode, aren't we? It's the callback episode. Okay. Well, okay okay before you move on would that be a any of that be a deal breaker for you yeah confessing he's madly in love with me on the first day that would be oh not even like

the knife thing i mean yeah the knife thing would be pretty bad uh uh but i don't know you'd be like yeah it depends what the rest of them are like I mean, yeah, the knife thing would be pretty bad. But I don't know, you'd be like, yeah, it depends what the rest of them are like. If you're on like a house on fire, that's something you could address later on. It'd be like, you need to wash the knife. Yeah, we gotta clean that knife or I'll just do it for you. Please don't tell me you cut your poo with that knife. I, you know, and like having a pocket knife or whatever it that to me is no big deal but i'd also be like i don't think we need to use that knife to cut this cake

there's other we have plenty of other knives there's knives here in fact i'd buy him a knife block for christmas yeah here have a whole set of knives for all your knife activities. Wash them, though. We also have a dishwasher. It's over there. Okay. Oh, so they're living together in this scenario, even though they just met. Yeah. I think that it would be a deal breaker for me, too, if we had just met it was like kind of our first date and I was hearing

that this person was madly in love with me however a bit of you would also be like oh my god no not that I do think I would be like oh god but I do have some relevant past experiences where maybe I gave someone the benefit of the doubt and I shouldn't have, and we'll talk about that today, maybe. Oh, I'm so excited. Okay, go on. All right, this one's good. I went on a breakfast date where my date ordered two sunny-side-up eggs.

He proceeded to take a straw, poke one in each yolk, and suck me yolks up. I like eggs, as we've all heard. That is... Do you like them enough to do that? No. There's no world where I would have dreamed of that and that is

repulsive isn't it gross and i can't believe be like just be like i i think how my face looks right now would be the and then just like you think that's acceptable behavior to do in public fucking doing at home by yourself i don't give a fuck right i'll put maybe it's one of those things where he thinks everyone eats eggs like that entire family yeah and he's going back to his friends and being like she ate her eggs with a knife and fork. What kind of weirdo does that? Fucking savage. God.

Okay. So I asked about his hobbies. This is a different one. I asked about his hobbies. He said that he played the bagpipes. I thought that was really cool and asked him to tell me more. He asked, are you sure? And I said, yes. He proceeded to go on about bagpipes for the rest of the night,

how he felt that playing bagpipes was his calling in life, how he needed to carry on his father's legacy, who also played the bagpipes, how he dreamed of playing bagpipes for the queen, what his favorite brand of bagpipes was, and the autonomy of bagpipes. the queen what his favorite brand of bagpipes was and the autonomy of bagpipes every topic was somehow turned back to bagpipes to be fair i did say yes to him telling me more i hope he's doing well and found someone just as passionate about bagpipes oh so this one is kind of i'm conflicted about because that would be a lot but also like is it really that horrible that he like has this passion I know and like I think I would be spinning it out like oh my god is the rest of my life going to be waking up at like 5 a.m to burn and I don't know if i could tolerate that so i understand this but it also just like okay like this is our first date maybe ask me a question about something

oh that's a nice handbag did you know that i play the bagpipes i also have a story about a guy i saw who really loved talking about two particular things pretty constantly, which I'll share more later so I can relate to that one too. Brilliant. Okay, here's a good one with a douchebag. He tried to control the whole day, what I wore, what I ate, whether I wore makeup or not, how I wore my hair, etc. He had this long list. So I answered the door with bedhead and baggy PJs, told him to buy a blow-up doll to control and not contact me ever again, then closed the door. Okay, I was going to ask, like, how did that happen if that was your first date?

But now it makes sense. So this was all maybe it was like an online dating thing and they're planning the date and he sent her that because my good for her that I would just be like, you know what? Fuck you, buddy. Change my mind. Thank you, though. Thank you for doing this now instead of, you know, after a few dates. Yeah, that's it. I saw the doucheness that is a lot and i guess it like is that maybe like an indicator of what he'd be like in a serious

relationship super controlling yeah yeah yeah big red flag the sad thing is i guess some girls would do it and then like if he did it right and a little bit at a time and it was kind of like oh well he asked me to wear a red dress and and heels because we're going somewhere nice okay and now now that we're in a relationship i'm not allowed to wear makeup i have to dress a particular way i can't see my that's i can see how people end up in those types of situations. It escalates, man. Yeah. Okay. He told me that we were going to a birthday party.

He refused to tell me for whom and said I didn't need to bring anything. Mm-hmm. It was a birthday party for Jesus at his dad's church. Oh, no. I am an atheist and was incredibly uncomfortable and angry. I don't like being lied to, and I did not go on another date. Oh no. Did he lie though? I guess a lie by omission. That's fair.

Did you go on a date with someone on Christmas Day? Even though I don't think that's actually Jesus' birthday. Was it Midnight? Curse. I mean, I guess a lie by omission, sure, but I mean, he said it was a birthday party. He wasn't really lying. I wonder if she told him he was an atheist and he's like, I'm gonna help her find

Jesus. I'm gonna convert her. I'm gonna show her the light. This is nice, short and sweet. My friend went out with a guy who got drunk and pooped his pants on the first date. And that is another indicator of a larger problem that bullet dodged. What would you do in that circumstance? I'm just curious. Would you just leave?

He's drunk enough that he shit his pants he's actually probably not gonna even remember i was here i'm just gonna leave that would be my response yeah i don't yeah i don't know there's no way i'd help clean that up well no of course not would you just call him a taxi or just leave him there like i'm not even sure i would do that i think i would just be like i actually don't know this person this isn't my responsibility and uh i wonder how long before she realized he pooped his pants yeah because i'm sure that wasn't like immediately obvious but maybe maybe it was. I don't know. Did she see it occur? Did it drop out of his shorts?

Was it like a very obvious face he made and she's like, are you pooping right now? Like a baby shit. Or like on Bridesmaids after they eat that food and get sick. And then Maya Rudolph's character's in the street and Kristen Wiig's like, oh, you're doing it. You're doing it. It's coming. Yeah, you're doing it. You're doing it. It's coming. Yeah, that's a bad one. Oh, God.

Okay. So the guy told me he would still be together with his kid's mum if she'd apologise for what she did wrong. Out of curiosity, I asked what she did wrong. I was expecting something like she cheated or something else that warranted an apology. Nope. Apparently, she kept nagging one day and wouldn't shut up, so he tied her to a computer chair, went out for three hours and left her there. I said it didn't sound like she was the one who needed to apologise and then left.

the one who needed to apologize and then left. So when he said if she apologized I'd still be with, like I'd get back with her what he meant to say was she left me, filed a restraining order and I can't see my kids right now. She needs to apologize.

What the fuck mate? Jeez. Oh dear. apologize like the tying to the chair seems like the unnecessary escalation yeah too that's a big problem like she was nagging so i just i like left for a while and because of that like we separated because she was mad i left then it'd be like okay you needed a break whatever but i also i'm feeling like if she apologized then you're just going to break up with me so and I feel like the time yeah tying her to the chair was totally unnecessary he could have just left that's what I mean like under any circumstance that feels like not the right response. But based on what he described happening,

like you could have just left and been like, I need a break because we're fighting and I want to chill out. You know, having to separate yourself from conflict is an appropriate thing to do sometimes. But tying someone to a chair, did you like shove a sock in her mouth too? Like if you have kids, don't let mommy out of the chair she's in time out what a dick yeah okay he got us pulled over the car was searched and he

had a brick of coke in the trunk i nearly got arrested and he finally vouched that it was a blind date and i was innocent oh my god imagine if he was like i don't know who that is and then looks at you and you're like not my car i've never met this man oh no yeah i guess that's why blind dates are risky huh never let them pick you up meet Meet them at the place. Yes. Always meet in a public area. And don't go in the woods. Stay out of the forest. I did that once.

Do you want to talk about it now? Yeah, I met a guy at a pub. And we said, oh, if it goes well, we could go for a walk in the woods. Afterwards. It went all right. So we went for a walk in the woods afterwards and it went all right so we went for this walk for some reason we decided to not use like the path in the woods and just like we or he decided yeah i can't remember to be honest but there was one point where i definitely thought this was a stupid idea like i'm not even in a the public path i'm just in the middle of the

fucking woods away from the path with a stranger who i've never met and he also kept trying to like trip me up and push me over because was he a 14 year old boy jemma exactly i was like i don't understand either you're trying to make me fall so that you can then murder me and bury me in the woods or you're just extremely immature i don't understand what's happening it's very weird i didn't see him again well i'm glad nothing bad happened and you had a realization rather quickly that this might not be the best idea. Yeah, I probably should have thought about that before I agreed to it. It's hard in the moment. And also, you don't want to be like, I think there's this whole theory about not wanting to be rude, right?

So, like, no offense, I don't want to go off the public path because I don't know you that well and you might be a murderer. Like, if I had the balls to actually say that at times then great but we we don't it's fine I'm probably not going to get murdered that's very much my attitude as I said last time like no one's going to sexually assault me if they do I hope it's swift and painless and that like if they're gonna kill me it's just quick such a positive I feel you I know I know but I I know what you mean and I understand okay this one I actually quite like he farted and smelled it then proceeded to rate the smell of the fart he was one of the characters from stepbrothers it was either will ferrell or john c reilly's character i think oh my gross the i mean i'm guessing that's like he just thought

that was a normal thing to do i guess so yeah like and then turns to her like how would you rate that well it's probably what he did with his mates you know I think farts can be funny but you wouldn't do it on a first date no well and as you and I were discussing before we started recording like how we are kind of when we first

start dating someone trying to be cool relaxed cool girl you know like we there's yeah let me smell your fart I love it that would have been you maybe me too honestly I don't know going back to the knife thing maybe even I would have been like that's so cool and handy that you can cut my cake and clean my shoes in the same moment i'm now like reflecting all of this and having second thoughts maybe i would have been like it's fine you shit your pants let me help you so cool and chill

i love it when people shit their pants. It's awesome. So hot. That person also was a 14-year-old boy, though, I think. Yeah. Right. Any more good ones? Oh, that makes me cringe

like in a good way or a bad way so it's he was clearly desperate to put a ring on anyone's finger he was intensely overly romantic despite not knowing me at all he put on a Sunday kind of love

by Etta James the date was on a Sunday by the way and tried to sing it to me while looking earnestly into my eyes. He was also in the military. Oh, that does make my skin crawl. Yeah. Sorry, go on. He was also in the military and we were both 19. Go figure.

Okay. That is interesting that you say this because this might not be something you know. this because this might not be something you know um there is kind of a a stereotype but also a little bit of a pattern that i've seen with folks in the military who i think for a variety of reasons really do try to like get in a relationship get married and I think part of it might be to do with benefits too and so like as soon as she said military I'm like that tracks in that I've had encounters with work where military couple one was in the military they started dating got married really quickly had kids were very young separated it was a whole hot mess because i think there's i don't know i don't know what the kind of like

reasoning behind it is but there is some truth behind that kind of like stereotype i think like marital just like we gotta get married yeah maybe and it might be that it might be like in case anything happens then it goes to someone or maybe you get like a little bit you get some accommodation if you're married and have kids so you're not going to get like deployed or something i don't know or better housing maybe more benefits i don't know interesting didn't know you could get a house if you married a military man. Well, they do have like mortgages, like better rates and like easier. You can buy a house, I think, a little bit easier if you were a veteran or in the military. There's lots of, you can get discounts on cars, tuition.

Yeah, there's a lot. I mean, that's how they, that's why, that's how they get people to join. You should see some of the adverts here. For king and country. Right? So patriotic. No, it's kind of like, I don't know, they're really like appealing to the young people. I don't know what they say now, but it's like,

you weren't made at school. You were made to build rocket ships and fucking RAF piloting. You weren't made in school. You were made in the military. It's really bad. I remember my younger brother being like those adverts are like really convincing like i want to join the army i was like so maybe a little bit predatory in a way yeah a little bit it's kind of like um how yeah well uh i remember so there's recruiting we have commercials too they're very like do you know

i think like that do something good they try to make it you know like look at all these avenues that you can have which i agree there there probably are um i i don't know enough to really go into that but we also had to take like a standardized test in high school called the, I think the acronym was ASVAB, A-S-V-A-B. And I didn't, I wasn't, yeah, I don't remember what it stood for. Because your ass is fab. Yep. That's why.

But I didn't pay attention to like any of the rules for testing and stuff. I just went in and I had my calculators using my calculator and you weren't supposed to use a calculator. Turns out I like did really well because of it. And I had like recruiters calling constantly to try to convince me to like agree to enlist when I graduated and stuff like that. And I was like, like no I cheated on that fucking test I'm dumb as hell so you could be like a general now I know I'm dumb as hell I would have been like sure and then they'd be like you're clearly very good at math and science and I'd be like oh fuck I gotta fake this now and it would have been

this whole saga where maybe i would have failed upwards i don't know and i could be a general probably not though i know someone that's training to be in the army um but they're going into like the medical side of it i think they still have to do like all the physical training and everything yeah boot camp and it sounds horrendous i don't know why anyone would want to do all the physical training and everything. Yeah, boot camp. It sounds horrendous. I don't know why anyone would want to do it. I'd have one person shout at me and be like, I don't like it. I'm so sorry. Please let me go.

It's all right. I'm a pathetic piece of dirt on your shoe. You're right. You're so right. Yeah. I would fail out quickly. There's a show here called SAS Who Dares Wins. And it's where people go and do like a course of our SAS training.

And my God, it looks fucking horrendous. Should we try it? No. I'd give up in the first 30 minutes, honestly. All we had to do was just walk through the woods jemma with some backpacks on yeah that's enough mine's too heavy they do these things called like bee stings where they have to be stings or bee stings like like ing yeah beast ing okay where they've got like they you know full equipment on

and they have to like climb up a mountain and then climb back down and then bring i don't know fucking water to a village in yeah tires up and then they'll if someone does something wrong then like everyone has to do do press-ups until the first person gives up or the last person gives up or something like that. It's just horrendous. I suppose it's those people who do that

because they're really into fitness and endurance and probably just want to see if they can. It seems to be more of a mental game because there's lots of people that are really physically fit, but if they can't push past the mental side of it, Right. It seems to be more of a mental game because there's lots of people that are really physically fit. But if they can't push past the mental side of it, then they fail. Oh, okay. Or they get booted out.

It's a good program, but fuck that. It makes me think of, do you guys have naked and afraid over there? Yeah. Like, I don't know what would possess anybody to be like, please drop me in a remote location where I can die, where I can strip fully naked with someone of the opposite sex who is also fully naked and have a camera crew following us around. But they can't help us and we have to survive for X amount of days. Like, I can't imagine anything worse. What you don't like being naked in front of strangers in the wilderness? Some might say that I am what is called a never nude. And I shower with denim shorts on and a denim bra and just, you know.

Why denim? No, it's from Arrested Development. I don't know if you've ever seen that show. One of the characters is never nude and you just can't be naked. And I was like, that, I actually resonate with that a little bit. For example, it's very hot here. It's been very hot this month and we've had some really consistently hot days. And I'm like, should I put on more clothes?

Really? Yeah. Where is my bubble hat? Yes, I need to wear a full coat right now. I need to protect my head. Yep. Anything else or no? Now I want you to tell me about your terrible dates slash relationship.

I think I told you. I know I've told you but I've been kind of enjoying bad dates the podcast it's great it's Jamila Jamil who's you know pretty famous British personality I guess yeah she's an actress isn't she well I've only become familiar with her because of the good place which which is, I love that show. I think she used to just host one of our like Sunday music shows on MTV or something. Yeah, I think I heard that she was like a VJ or an MC or something, like a TV personality. I was really shocked when I saw she was on The Good Place. I was like, she's just a TV presenter. You can be anything you want to be if you're already famous.

True, and good looking yeah go to LA yep but so she's got this podcast and she's got like this interesting kind of own dating she's like I'm the worst dater no and I she said it enough that I'm inclined to believe that she's talking about what like she perceives her experiences to to be but she acts like she's like this troll and no one's ever wanted to date her she's finally in this relationship but she has these comedians and and celebrities come on to talk about their dating experiences right it's a really good podcast i recommend stop advertising on the podcast i know but it's good and i remember being jealous because i was like this is what i want in our podcast and we have out in part anyway um and not to totally rip it off but I started thinking about like I

wonder how like how I would answer some of the questions she asks and think about we already talked a lot about like my actual like dating going on date experiences are kind of limited but I've had relationships where there's been some bad slash hilarious experiences some of which I've already shared like Trevor you might be Trevor might be an idiot right um but I guess just thinking about some of my relationships and what it's like to date me I started thinking like okay I suspect that I probably am not fully honest about who I am as a person and my needs. Try to act like a very chill, cool person and like let a lot of things slide and like kind of give people second chances because I want to seem like, I can't let that one go. And you, whether it's because it's been building up or just like expressing a negative emotion about something and then suddenly being like, well, you're crazy. Right.

So it's like, no, I just, that's actually really shitty. And you shouldn't do that. But you're so chill. Why are you acting like this now? Exactly. But that's kind of how I think I would probably characterize what it's like maybe dating me and I I don't know if you generally feel the same about yourself or if you have any other thoughts I always used to play the cool girl I mean I think

I am quite cool I don't think I think you're cool thank Thank you. I mean, I appreciate that. I think I'm generally pretty chilled anyway. But there was definitely playing it even more chilled, as you say, you know, not confronting stuff that really pissed me off or like, you know, really bad behavior and things like that. Just being like, no, I'm totally chill with it. Don't worry and then when you don't address that uh resentment grows and the issue becomes a lot worse and then it explodes out a lot later yep yep I think I have to express my feelings exactly I think I've gotten better at that too um but just thinking about some of my early relationships, for example, let me get my notes here because I have a couple. And did I talk about, I think I touched upon maybe this particular relationship is very short lived. I was in high school. It's kind of like early on in my

dating life. He was a very, very attractive person from a different school. And so I was like, I can't believe this person wants to go out on a date with me, but I sure will. Well, much like the guy who loves the bagpipes, this young man really loved pointing out all of the lawns he mowed for his part-time job, all of the terrible looking lawns, the things those lawns needed to look better, being like, isn't that lawn so nice looking? It's because I work on that lawn. Your school's lawn is shitty. My school's lawn is really, really nice. Constantly talking about grass and lawns and lawn mowing. Wow.

Which, great to have a passion, for sure. But, like, I don't think we really talked about anything else. And the other thing he liked to bring up. Did you join in? I just. There's a shit lawn over there. I just listened, I think, because I didn't really care or know what to say in response. I think because I didn't really care or know what to say in response um and he also really liked to talk shit about my school school lunch and how their school lunch was so much better how did he know he wouldn't and I also know that's not true because I have friends who went to that

school and they would joke about how like being kind of the wealthier school we had like a blizzard machine that made like ice cream with the you know like it's a mcflurry pretty much and like a little room where you could buy candy bars and other things and we had pizza Fridays and so I was like I know that's not true your school lunch actually sucks so I did engage sadly in that conversation just arguing about how fucking good your school lunches are yeah and then I realized this is not a relationship I can be in and so I was just you know it was only like a two-week thing um and I was like 15 or 16 so you can imagine how in-depth that was even yeah but then when we broke up and I continued

through my high school career and we would like no he didn't my parents would never really poorly he cut it too low at the height of the sun so everything burned no um but I would like our school would have games or matches against them and he was a wrestler and I was like the wrestling team for our school's manager, which did not mean I didn't do anything. I just like went, I just went around. My, my friends were cheerleaders. So it was kind of like a way for me to hang out with my friends, I guess. I had two moms come up to me and say, you know, I'll call him Paul uh Paul pointed me out to you and said you're the girl who broke his heart and I'm like wow I I don't know what to say to you right now because I'm a child and you're

literally a grown person and saying this to me to me yeah all you wanted to do was tell you it's because i listened so well so he mistook that for love of longs yeah so that was a fun experience that kind of like continued for a bit but that's not the first time i've had someone say that i've like broken a human um the next guy i dated and it's so fucked up then it's just like this isn't my fault but the next guy I dated dated for a little longer like serious quote-unquote boyfriend in high school right yeah and I think I was the first girl he ever dated quote-unquote um but after we broke up to this day if I encounter any people from my school who were in that friends group, we talk about how I apparently totally changed and like changed who this person was.

That he became this entirely different kind of horrible human who was just never the same again after that. Oh, wow. Yeah. You were the catalyst that turned him into a monster. yeah you were the catalyst that turned him into a monster and his mom his parents lived down the street from me we were just a couple like like a two-minute walk apart and like after graduating I ended up at their house for a party somehow and his mom had been drinking and like pulled me under a lap and cried and was like I thought you'd be mine and again I'm like I'm a mere 19 year old child and you're a grown person and I don't know what to do here hey you attract some crazies don't you they're parents I guess more so than them but

and then you know I had in college a boyfriend that I broke up with one night and didn't go back to my apartment that evening. Went back the next day and found that my birth control was stolen. And my roommate saying, oh, yeah, your boyfriend stopped by to wait for you. And so I just told him, you know, she's not here, but you can your boyfriend stopped by to wait for you. And he went, so I just told him, you know, she's not here, but you can go chill in her room if you want. And he's like, I don't think he's still here. I thought I heard him leave. And then I went in there and I was like, oh, he stole my birth control. And he admitted it later. Cause he was like, well, I didn't want you slutting around. And I'm like, okay.

I'm like, okay. Fucking hell. Okay. Thank you for doing that. Because I certainly would have if it weren't for you, my hero. Thank you for my birth control. Just, yeah. And I dated him for a long time.

Kind of, I hate to say this, kind of out of convenience, but when I reflect on that relationship, I really just settled for a lot. Yeah, I had, well, it wasn't a similar thing. He didn't steal my birth control or cut the end of condoms off or anything. It would have been funny. Not funny, it would have been horrifying. But he used to stand me up all the time. condoms off or anything um funny not funny it would have been horrifying but but he used to like stand me up all the time um and like

say like horrible things but then later be like i was only joking like you're crazy if you think i'm being horrible oh just gaslighting. Yeah, basically. And eventually I got sick of it and so broke up with him. And this seems to be like a running theme. So I break up with someone and then they become super obsessed. Yeah.

And like crazy over me. They lose their shit. Lose their shit, yeah. I had another boyfriend who broke up with me went and slept with loads of other people and then a few weeks later realized that he wanted me back and i was like no we're you know we're done i'm done with this and he actually at the time his parents house

was like behind my parents house at the time and our bedrooms like looked onto each other oh no and there was one night where he was like shining a torch through the window to try and get my attention because i wasn't

replying to text messages that is like some american teen rom-com stuff like morse code in the window that we did when we were kids when we were but just childhood schoolmates but now we love each other. Ooh. He thought he was grand gesturing you. I just felt it was freaky. Yeah. It's so funny.

I know I said this on a previous episode. But it's like you broke up with me. And like you get to walk by now and call me a whore. Because I'm sitting outside with another guy. Like you dumped me. You dumped me. Oh, God. sitting outside with another guy like you dumped me you dumped me oh god they they you know they are and like i said earlier i know that in my younger days i certainly wasn't like always the innocent one and have done things to be hurtful whether intentionally or not just because particularly when we're in high school and stuff like it is my perspective that those relationships aren't meant to be the ones

we're in forever. But I know people are like there's high school sweethearts who are together forever. And that's great. Like that clearly is because, yeah, you found that person. But like, I look back on a lot of my relationships and first of all, I'm like, why did I do that? Mm hmm. And then second, I I'm like so glad I'm not anymore and then third like I guess I learned some things about myself in that regard yeah that's the thing isn't it like I think every bad relationship is good because you learn something from it even if it's terrible manipulative and horrible you learn not to tolerate that behavior anymore and you know

if you've been the crazy bitch you learn not to do that anymore like it's all a big learning curve yeah I so I always I have thought about whether or not I actually wanted to go into this one and I know I've told you a little bit about it like off air as over the years because it's pretty bad. But I look back now and try not to like really blame myself or feel ashamed by it because I know it wasn't my fault like I initially felt it was. But when I was in law school, like had been in a relationship, that relationship went sour and kind of got involved sort of with another guy briefly. And it turns out he had been pining for me since day one of law school. And this was year three. So, you know, three years later that we finally like had like just very specific memory of

the first time he laid eyes on me and it was game over since then and didn't know this when things started and you know he was pretty quiet and whatever so I didn't initially envision this, but it, it, it escalated to the point where he got kicked out of law school because of it. Yeah. And I really just was like trying to keep a low profile and I didn't want to get anyone in trouble. I just wanted to be left alone. And I had a really good friend who listens to the podcast who was like, this is not acceptable. And, you know, helped me go get a restraining order, which was denied, despite the fact that he caused significant damage to my car that he paid for. And I like didn't tell my parents or anybody, didn't go to insurance. Like he paid for it all so that I wouldn't have to. Um, and ultimately like my friend told like the student, like, I can't remember what the unit

was, but basically like kind of helps students in various ways. And they intervened and there was like this agreement that he was supposed to leave me alone but he could not and i had to say he is not following the rules and they kicked him out of law school oh my gosh and it continued after i graduated through the summer to the point where I was taking the bar. I had met Sean already and like his family got involved. He like tried to, he like flipped his car and ended up in the hospital and his family was like, please don't. And I'm like, I'm not contacting him. He still has my email address because that email still exists. I changed my phone number. I moved and was not engaging. And I have still like a whole inbox full of all of these emails.

It was bad. He had some mental health issues and some substance abuse issues, which I think were a big influence on that. So that is, I'm not trying to like fully say is like this horrible human being and I'm not trying to like fully say that this is something that I like brought onto myself but there were a lot of things that like could have been done differently yeah and it sounds like there's a lot of things that could have happened differently thank god for your friend as well yeah like noticing and being like this is not okay yeah like i couldn't talk to people at school people i'd been going to i couldn't talk to a professor without him being like oh you're fucking him now and you're fucking him you're such a whore

and i'm just like please just leave me alone please please please please please please please please god so were you actually like in a relationship or was this just his kind of fantasy world I mean I I would say we were but it became pretty apparent pretty quick that there were issues and so I tried to distance myself from him without like while trying not to piss him off because I was actually very scared of him yeah and like how he acted so I was like trying to be like look like you're nice and all but this isn't like you have some issues like this is too much for me like you wrecked my car you you know he acted this way I had to do an internship in D.C. the first semester of my law school, like last year of law school. He drove from where my law school was in the Midwest to D.C. and was standing outside of my work with the federal government agency I worked at.

And I was like, I don't know what to do. So I know like I could have done more to be like, leave me alone, cutting off contact. But like I said, I didn't really know what to do. So I was trying to be nice, you know? And if you were scared of him as well, it's that, you know, if I do end it and, you know, be harsh, then that could also result in a different outcome. I thought going to D.C. would help because like I wouldn't be there, you know, and it was like, kind of, yeah, there was drama in the, like the kind of the friends group that developed too because of it. And so I was like, well, I'm going to DC and I'm just like gonna,

but he wouldn't stop. And I, like I said, I felt bad. And so then when I came back, I luckily was able to move residences. And so then he didn't know where I lived. And I changed my phone number. The phone number I had since I was like in seventh grade. I love that phone number for no real reason. But then he, I remember calling that number to just be like, have you been getting calls and text messages from this person? And she was like, yeah, you must be Kate. Oh, my God.

And she's like, sounds like he really has a thing for you. And I was like, that is one way of putting it. And I'm really sorry that you ended up with my phone number, but I just wanted to give you a heads up. And they wouldn't give you a restraining order i i don't i have no idea why it got denied because i especially knowing what i know now about them like yeah it's purely the the judge probably the the state i was in i don't think like nebraska has particularly like supportive victim laws and and resources so bloody hell yeah it was bad they I think the loss I heard a couple years later that from someone I knew who

was like when I was a 3L she was a 1L um she had messaged me and she's like hey that guy that was in your grade that left is back and like finishing up and I reached out to like the student person and I was just like hey no one like asked me if I heard from him or anything since and I hadn't since after I took the bar exam like he stopped after a while but I was like it just would have been good for you guys to like check you know and she's like well we did and I was like oh well you guys do not have my current contact information then because I never heard from anyone but you know what if he did what you guys thought he needed to do and could show that like he had was doing better then fine I'm yeah I'm okay with him going back and finishing but I also like this I'm

I'm concerned that this person is practicing law that's what i was just about to say it's yeah slightly concerning that that behavior um is yeah okay wow yeah i'm a bit speechless that's crazy that's probably my craziest story and kind of i think i just think about you know what we talked about last time and kind of over some of our episodes about just like how society treats victims and toxic masculinity and and all of that and you know I had some feedback from a friend of mine after our last episode about how you know like it would be better for men even if they're talking with the lads and you know kind of joking about stuff really to actually say that's not cool that's's not okay, you shouldn't say that, rather than kind of like jokingly engage, you know?

Yeah. And I came across a BuzzFeed article about, you know, 16 disgusting, rage-inducing, and downright horrifying behaviors by men that made women end their friendship with them, you know? And so it kind of made me think about maybe if I ever encounter something like that in a friendship of mine, like would it be better to actually say, you know what, like no.

And if that person isn't super open to what I have to say, then like, do I want to be friends with them? I think that's a good barometer, right? Yeah, for sure, yeah. One being he told me a mutual friend who had been sexually assaulted deserved it because she was wearing a bikini in front of boys and obviously asking for it we were in his pool at the time and i was in a bikini like my response would have been like oh so am i asking for it right now yeah and then of course it was no that's not what i meant well

fucking tell me what you meant then because that's exactly what you said. Why is it different for her? Yeah, exactly. After I went through a breakup, my friend of over 10 years got mad when I met someone else. He tried to say I should sleep with him because he's known me longer. Like, I don't have sex with people based on seniority. He's like, but I've been friend zone for so long it's my turn okay you're right get all right sorry come on in you get

um when he said about andrew tate i get he's not perfect but the media is treating him unfairly he really opened my eyes oh yeah that would be like be like, we're done. That's enough for me. That's enough for me. He expected me to mother him and be his sole emotional support while also demeaning me and my own problems. I've had a few guys with and it's uh it's it's um testing to say the least um i don't want to be your mummy that's what i'm here for please are we talking about like romantic relationships yeah or just oh okay yeah yeah yeah yeah yes i certainly don't want to be i mean that just kind of changes the whole dynamic a little bit it's not really that fun that I have to like clean up after you exactly like I had one that was like couldn't do their own washing because they didn't know how to use a washing machine and I'm like you literally just click the on button it's not that hard that is called something and i can't think

of it right now even though i was just talking about it it's called like um intentional like intentional helplessness or something where it's like i don't know how so i guess you have to do it because my mom didn't teach me and it's you see that in relationships where women are the ones who end up doing a lot of the chores and caretaking and stuff and well I don't know how to load a dishwasher so you just do it better you're so good at it yeah I was talking about this with someone the other day actually um about how it really fucks me off when people say they can't cook yeah me too actually no offense to my friend if he's listening he knows who he is but yeah like uh it's not difficult just read the back of the packet on the food you buy or look at

a recipe and you know what it tells you exactly what you need to do and for how long and at what temperature just follow the steps and even if you fuck it up the first time you've learned and the next time you'll probably get it right there's people that are like i can't even boil an egg i'm like you're a fucking idiot then yeah yep i agree i mean and i've certainly had my own like i taught myself how to cook like it was it wasn't i mean my mom's a really good cook and my dad tried but like that wasn't a focus in our house and Like it was, it wasn't, I mean, my mom's a really good cook and my dad tried, but like that wasn't a focus in our house. And so it was truly like, if I want to eat something that I enjoy, I'm going to have to figure it out. Exactly. And you know, we have Google these days.

It's not, it's not hard guys. Now this one's a frustrating one. I've cut off several and all for the same reason they tried to make our friendship either sexual or romantic or both uh the age-old question can men and women be exclusively friends yeah there seems to be a real split on this i was reading something about it um a little while ago and i've always been of the opinion as yes you can because i have lots of male friends and i've always had a very um split friendship group like there's males and females in it so i'm like yeah it's it's not an issue but loads of people seem to be of the opinion that like no definitely you can't if like your girlfriend's friends with a guy

then they're definitely interested in them and something's happened between them and that just blows my mind I think the world would be a better place if more people had both female and male friends because you learn from both perspectives so I agree with you and I actually had this conversation not too long ago with someone who was of the opposite opinion and his perspective was like even if it's not vocalized it is highly likely that one or the other has like sexual attraction or romantic feelings for that person even if like they know that it won't happen and they'll continue the friendship but like and so I think he he would when I would say well no I can think of a ton of male friends who didn't

and he's like you don't know that for sure like I bet if you had ever been like oh you know I'm into you or I think we should hook up like they would have been like can we do it right now and I was like I don't think so though though. I really don't. Sure, maybe some of them and then usually that would become known at some point, right? But I guess that to his point is like, you could never know, you know? No, you couldn't. But I also think it says more about that person. I agree. I agree. I agree.

And I think the question is just like, are men or women able to look at like, I guess the opposite sex, if that's the gender they're attracted to anyways, and not have it like, even if it's just a fleeting thought of like, she looks cute today, I would, you know,

but, and never again. Right. Or not even like an attraction. But if someone was like, would you hook up with so and so? And they'd be like, yeah, sure. Why not? You know, like, can you have a friendship without having those thoughts? You know what I mean?

Yeah. it also makes me think of like i've met guys before that are like scared of gay men because they think because they're gay that means they're automatically going to come on to them like you think a lot of yourself to think that just because they're gay that means they're going to try and you're a man yeah yeah like also the the implication that like gay people don't have types and like are will just literally be attracted to or want to have sex with anyone as long as they've got a penis i'm into it yeah yeah very weird all right so we met up for drinks and he told me he cheated on his girlfriend he was very

unapologetic about it he got drunk later on and started making weird trashy and creepy remarks about women have you ever had a friend who is just like actually really horrible about women or to women? Don't think I have. who I know of who are in like either like whatsapp chats or like gaming chats and amongst themselves they can be quite used like derogatory language against women and stuff which is quite shocking because when they're around us women in the friendship group, they're really respectful. So it's clearly like a... Let's all dance like we're talking about.

Am I the asshole? And like maybe don't do that. And because maybe some of your friends actually are like that to women or believe that. And perhaps just you saying... And some of them have children. Yeah. And daughters. or believe that and perhaps just you saying children yeah and daughters and that's what shocks me the most because i just think can't you have some perspective and think would you

want people talking about your kids like that like i mean i think the answer is no but they they clearly can compartmentalize yeah you know anyway that's i thought i would share some of those just because i thought it tied in nicely with last episode and some of our discussions today this has been the throwback episode i think a recap is isn't dating suck it is horrible i'm sorry to everyone out there who is having to go through that and thinking about all of their bad dates and if you as jamila jamil would say if you can't think of a bad date maybe it's because you're someone else's bad date and have a think about that and reflect on that behavior yeah we're talking about that earlier and i can't really think of that many bad ones so well you've shared plenty i mean you shared the guy who was repulsed by your left-handedness

um and i know there were other ones that i can't think of so but i will fully say that the few dates that i've been on whether i perceive them as bad or good, it could have been bad for the other person, too. I acknowledge that. Some people are just not meant to be with you. And that's just how it is. No, everyone is. Because Catherine has been married for some years now. And I did end up finding an all right person yay alan yay alan until he tripwires you

down the stairs and has like a bucket of paint come from a rope i'm giving him ideas to hit like splashy in the face and then you get feathered and stuff like covered in tar feathered yeah i look forward to that am i the arsehole for letting my pregnant fiance think i'm cheating on her my fiance jen is insecure right now given that she's 32 weeks pregnant i still think she's beautiful no matter what, but telling her makes no difference. Now, for the past six years, we have been basically inseparable. I actually enjoy her company

to a point of me not really wanting to go out without her. She's fun and makes my night way better by having her around. We are also very open with communication and we aren't blind so we will 100% tell each other when we find someone else attractive. Well, given this detail I may have fucked up a bit because I told Jen that I thought my buddy's

girlfriend was gorgeous and had nice hips. Now this is not an uncommon comment for the record. It was merely bad timing because she's pregnant and insecure. I shouldn't have said anything. But again, we have always talked like this to each other, so I just wasn't thinking. I mean, two months ago, she pointed out some very attractive man and said he had arms that could toss her around the bedroom. Lol. Neither of us act on anything like this. It's all talk and sometimes leads to extra spicy time.

That's all. But anyways, I made the comment about my buddy's girlfriend and she agreed with me at first, but it soon fell apart. See, I go to my buddy's house quite often and she's always invited, but she's been declining because of being uncomfortable because the baby's on her sciatic nerve. Or saying she doesn't really want to be around people because she feels gross. But she did go with me two days ago and I guess I let my eyes wander a bit and she noticed.

I didn't notice. She asked me to bring her home and was being super quiet and when I finally got it out of her, she said, you told me that she's gorgeous and has nice hips and then you guys eye fuck each other in front of me.

I asked what she was talking about and she openly said, Are you fucking her? Because you're there a lot. So I said, Don't be silly. Of course not. I drop her off and she tells me to go have fun. So I go back there.

When I get home. When I get home, she was in bed and distant. asked what was wrong and she said you just left me here thinking you're cheating and go back to hang out with her with zero qualms by the way my buddy's girlfriend wasn't there when I got back I said you told me to go back

and have fun babe I didn't realise you were serious she says as if you didn't realise I was being serious and turns to go to bed. Now I'm feeling incredibly stupid, but I don't even know what to say to her. It's tense. Am I the asshole? The degree of which this person can acknowledge

how his wife is uncomfortable, given being pregnant, the baby's making 32 weeks is pretty far along. I bet she's uncomfortable having never been pregnant. Like I can only imagine and that she's feeling insecure. She's made comments about it, tried to reassure. Doesn't matter. It's how she feels in her body. I've definitely felt uncomfortable in my body before to the point where it's like, I also don't want to go out, you know? It's hard. and like not reading the room is just this like kind of dumb male ignorance of, well,

you told me and we used to do this, but yet you still can acknowledge how she is right now. So things aren't the same. And why can't you put those puzzle pieces together to see maybe now is not the time for me to share this. And maybe now is the time to see that my pregnant fiance probably needs me to be at home with her because she's upset even though she said go have fun so like I want to say yes he is the asshole but I also not knowing this person and like are you just a dummy who really can't who you just can't oh you poor you're so dumb you're just poor sweet dummy you can't actually put the puzzle pieces together

because you're not smart enough i don't know that's i'm conflicted about it because it's like when you said the title i initially thought that he was like oh i've been cheating on you when he hasn't you know that's what i was expecting but it was more just like he just was so clueless and naive about these cues she was directly sending him and kind of indirectly sending him yeah I think there's also a difference between saying a stranger's hot and saying someone that you spend time with yeah yeah I think there's a bit of a difference in that and it's likely to cause insecurities even when someone isn't outrageously hormonal and 32 weeks pregnant yeah well and then i guess she really cared when she actually kind of observed

something that maybe she was hypersensitive to and maybe wouldn't have minded as much under other circumstances but because of how she was feeling it meant more to her you know exactly but yeah i agree that person walking down the street is attractive versus my best friend's girlfriend that i see on a weekly basis is attractive yeah yeah there is a difference there i think different um and also just fyi if like your pregnant girlfriend turns around to you and says, no, it's fine. It is not fine, dear listener. That is a sign that things are not fine. Okay.

We talk in riddles. That's how we approach life. And maybe we need to be more direct and honest with our communication. I agree. maybe we need to be more direct and honest with our communication i agree but also she truly maybe was really just hoping that whether or not she thought it was fine and he should go that he would not you know it's a test of sorts i get it but also didn't want to like ruin a night because we're the cool, fun girls. Yeah. Don't worry.

We're super cool. You can do whatever you want. I don't mind. Oh, you're cheating on me. It's absolutely fine. I don't mind. Oh, it's our 10th anniversary and you want to go watch the football match. That's fine.

I'll just wear this dress and do the dishes. Like a good little girlfriend. I'm totally cool. Don't worry about it. I don't know. So asshole, maybe a little asshole. Yeah, I think he's a bit of an asshole. I mean, I get that he didn't clock on to it because of their previous dynamic.

And that's how they usually, you know, talk about people. But as you say, he did not read the room. And should have considered her insecurities. The fact that she's super hormonal. And that it's also his friend's girlfriend who he spends a lot of time with. So, yeah, check yourself before you wreck yourself so now you need to i don't know like get her a massage that's good for pregnant women because it hurts to carry your baby and you know, make her feel good. Yeah. Like, you got some work to do, bruh. Yeah, man.

She's carrying your spawn. So prepare yourself for the rest of your life. Yeah, no kidding. Well, another problem solved. Fixed a man. Helped a woman. Took some ownership of her own shit. Yeah.

Really good episode i think once again we've um we've learned a lot about ourselves about other people we've given advice and uh yeah as you say we've grown into better people every day is a school day folks indeed i can't wait for summer break when i don't have to learn anymore god i'd love six weeks off wouldn't you yeah i don't know shouldn't they just do that every few years just be like yeah summer holidays are out everyone gets the summer off i mean i'd be really curious to see what the world looked like when that happened but yeah probably so much happier and so much more relaxed true

jemma for president i would not do that job no thank you no hard pass no hard pass on that one well look guys if you would like to please send us in your embarrassing first dates terrible first dates or even wonderful first dates. Let's get some wholesome shit on here. Yeah, that's true. We'd really like to hear them. If you also are wondering whether you've been an arsehole in a situation and want us to help you out with our

incredible advice, we can also do that. And if you want to get in contact with us you can email us at talkshit2us at gmail.com. I doubted myself halfway through saying that then. I was like, I had it all going and then I was like. Yeah, I was thinking how she's got it this time.

Nearly. It was close. TalkShitToUs at gmail.com. Yeah. That was me doing an American accent oh I thought I was saying it yeah just don't want to confuse anyone who's listening

or get in contact with us on social media at tsybpod on twitter which x whatever that's called now instagram and tiktok tiktok tiktok now instagram and tick tock tock tock tickety tickety tock tock tick tock tick tock tick

i don't even know anymore i'm a geriatric millennial i can't read everything is so different myspace biba yep oh i don't, wait, we talked about that last time, right? With the little people. No, Bebo was like a MySpace-y thing. We didn't have that. Oh. Poor you. We had LiveJournal, MySpace. Never heard of

a LiveJournal. AIM. It literally was just you blog, post. Oh. So you could Google people's, like like diaries, which seems like a really bad idea. Seems pretty invasive. Yeah. Your stalker would have enjoyed that though.

Yeah, I suppose. Maybe I'll read you some of his story because I have it. All fair though. Yes. All right. Well, until next time. Until next time. Toodaloo. Ta- though. Yes. All right. Well, until next time. Until next time. Toodaloo.

Ta-ta. Bye. Bye. Au revoir. Adios. Auf Wiedersehen. Good day. We'll see you next time. you