Talking Shit with a Yank & a Brit - 37. Grab life by the Labia

Episode Date: February 8, 2024

This week we've got birthday chat, surprises, food poisoning, different names for things in the US & UK, and an AITA!Get involved at [e-mail] or on social media @TSYBPOD

Hello and welcome back to Talking Shit with a Young Color Brit! Yeah! Whoa, whoa, whoa! Oh, that crowd got wild! Oh, I can't believe we managed to sell out Wimbledon for our first live show. You hear that crowd, everyone? Wimbledon or Wembley? Sorry, everyone.

I got it wrong. Wembley, I mean. Wimbledon is where they do the tennis. Yeah. I don't know. My bad. I'm American. Never been into one, though.

My bad, I'm American. Never been into one, though. We really wouldn't be able to restart or do over an intro in a live show, would we? No. We'd have to roll with that fuck up. Yeah, but people would like it. Yeah, classic Kate the dumb one. Anyway, hi, how are you? I'm well. How are you, though?

You know, I am alive. I am functioning and I am here. Good. Well, that's much better than you were last week. Yeah, so I know we had many fans reach out about the lack of episode last week. AKA one person, my cousin Cassie. Hey, gal. I was going to say I heard from no one. Yeah. It was Cassie who also was like, well, you're really sick.

So I'm guessing that's why there's no podcast today. Yeah. Correct. Yeah. It was a dark couple days in our household. I came down with some food poisoning um yeah i thought it was only gonna afflict me but it unfortunately also inflicted sean about 12 hours or so after me and we came to realize was because he chose to finish my food that made me sick so um yeah nice well i'm glad you're feeling better yeah thanks i wanted to give a visual to you and

to the audience at home because i i'm not joking when i was laying in bed i was like am i gonna be able to record today get better so I can record today and I like got myself into the bathtub which is not something I do as we've discussed um because I was like maybe that'll help and I'm just like kind of leaning against the side of the tub like this yeah and I look at my phone and have the message from you who's like hey is it cool if we do it at this time and I like it takes all of the strength I could muster to even respond to you how sad I well and I was so sad because I really didn't I wanted to I was like I can sit and talk to her no I could not you could not do that it's not good funnily enough when I had food poisoning the only thing that helped was being in the bath or in the shower because like maybe that stopped me vomiting for like

two minutes i don't nothing helped there was nothing that could help me other than just working through it i guess and i was just so so thirsty but you know how it is when you like need to just take a little sips I couldn't I was like I was just like drink puke drink puke sucking on ice helps you know what Sean did that and I was like how come you didn't tell that to me as you watched me laying as I went and then I i was like what he got there and he's like ice and i was like no one has ever said this to me and you just were watching me suffer yeah sean for fuck's sake god nigel yeah so that happened and then you know unfortunately we couldn't record and then we were looking forward to maybe an episode record this weekend and here we are on a Tuesday because happy birthday Gemma

thank you and my weekend was lovely um yes it was my 35th birthday whoop whoop whoop whoop um and yeah i had i had a lovely time because i was thrown a surprise party yeah i posted some pictures from it of you and i at the surprise party on instagram you flew over especially for it didn't you yep i did it was really it was really nice You were so surprised. No, I was genuinely really fucking surprised. It was really nice. Nailed it. Way to go, Boyfie. Way to go, BF. Yeah, we were

meant to be, or I thought we were going to a party at his friend's. Because I've not met many of his friends and he mentioned a little while ago that his mate was having a party and at first I was like oh it's my birthday and then I was like actually this could be really good because I'll get to meet some of his friends and it's a party yeah built up I don't have to organize you know great it was like when our friends got married

and I was like this is actually for me. Thank you so much for throwing a party for my birthday. This huge marquee and a band and everyone's dressed up. And there's going to be a ceremony where it's kind of about you guys for a bit, but the rest is about me. So yeah, I feel you. Yeah, that's kind of, it's a really good way to look at it yeah um so we had a nice day went for went down to the coast and had a lovely walk with dogs uh and came back and just sort of you know got ready to go out um he's not been very

feeling very well recently and he was sort of saying that that was. Was he playing it up? Yeah. Okay. A little bit. Like two months ago, started saying, I'm not feeling good. Well, funnily enough, he's been ill for a while. But he's had an infection.

So that's why. Okay. But he was saying his chest was hurting. And we're driving there i then realized i'd left my cbd vape at home and my handbag stuffing because we were rushing to get out on time um and so we sort of got about i don't know 20 minutes down the road um and i was like look i think you should turn around now so that i can go back and get my bag at least um and he was sort of saying oh my chest really hurting and i was like it'll be fine like don't worry like if you don't want to drive i can drive

there and then you know if you're still feeling shit when we get there because it was quite a drive away it's like an hour away from mine um yeah if you're still feeling shit when we get there because it was quite a drive away it's like an hour away from mine yeah um yeah if you're still feeling shit i won't drink and we can drive back later it'll be fine uh and he was like yeah okay fine we'll do that we'll go back and get your stuff and then but we'll go to the shop and get a couple of cans of cocktail or something so we've got something to drink when we get there it's like cool get to the supermarket go and get some bits came back to the car and he was like I'm going to text them and bail because I really can't be bothered I'm feeling too shit

and you're like no you fucking suck it up you little bitch I'm not sitting at home on my birthday I was nice and I was like okay but I was a bit like oh I don't really want to sit at home you know on a birthday night um I went to mine opened the front door and there was a nice nothing like going through

this like oh you know it's my birthday but that's kind of fun we can go to oh I guess we're gonna just like this rollercoaster of like it was yeah it's my birthday and it's gonna be shit it was a rollercoaster of emotions but it was really good really good

yeah I had a lovely weekend felt very spoiled and loved and It was a roller coaster of emotions. But it was really good. Really good. Yeah, I had a lovely weekend. Felt very spoiled and loved. And it was good. Good times. Glad to hear it. Sorry I couldn't be there to celebrate. Well, you did say you were going to come over in February, actually.

I know. Where are you? I was thinking about that, too. And I did actually even look at flights after we got back from our last trip in October um I think actually what maybe limited me is I have to I'm doing another training that starts this week and I just think I was like I don't know if I can make all of those things work but you everyone heard it here first on this podcast on this episode. Your 40th birthday, we're doing something and I'm gonna fucking be there. Okay, fine.

It gives me five years. Five years to book a fucking flight. Can you book flights five years in advance, do you think? I will. Start planning it now, but it'll be a surprise, so hopefully you forget this whole conversation happened.

Well, this is the thing, actually. Alan did it off the back of me saying that I've never had a surprise party and no one ever really surprises me with stuff. Mainly because even if they try to, I find out and guess. And people just really shit surprising me but i had no idea do you ever have to like pretend you don't know because like i swear to god every single surprise party or anything that anyone's ever mostly sean anyone has ever tried to do i've pretty much no someone accidentally told me i saw something and I've had to make the choice of do I say anything yeah do I not I just won't yeah this time another time it was kind of like I already

know sorry let's just make it easier on ourselves yeah you know not worry about that part anymore that started from a young age for me as well I remember for my i think it was my 12th birthday my parents got me a surprise limo drive for me yeah me and my friends got to go in a limo drive about and pretend we were drinking champagne when i think it was actually like fizzy apple juice or something yeah um and that was meant to be a surprise but about an hour before the limo was due to arrive one of my mom's friends rang the house phone showing my agent um and like ruined the surprise for me was like oh you're going out in a limo tonight aren't you that's exciting and i was like um yeah i hate to say it but like i suppose it's always good to find out like anytime someone's talking about birthday plans for someone else like is this a surprise

or people talking about it with other people need to say that shit because like i know that i've probably come close to or have ruined surprises not thinking that it was just like oh yeah we're going away for someone's birthday and it's like you excited for your birthday trip and it's like what fuck I didn't know why did you tell me yeah so caution out there for everyone just assume it's a surprise unless you're explicitly told it's not yes that's the way to deal with it I think yeah well I mean welcome to your other half of your 30s I guess I've you know I'm about a year ahead of you I can tell you what to expect thank you it's horrible cool everything genuinely I've been more achy already yeah that's it i'm getting a weird pain in my back my hip flexors are hurting because i'm sitting down too much yep downhill and my mum reminded me yesterday that i'm now closer to 40

than i am 30 so that was fun to find out which is closer to 50 and then 60. Yeah. I suppose, yeah, I'm closer to 60 now than I am. Anything. Anything. Yeah, that's great. It's fun, isn't it? Yeah, I love getting older. I'm going to try not to cry. This actually, this podcast is just turning into

how horrible it is to get older. It's all it is it's actually quite nice being older I think I prefer being my my 30s and my 20s I agree and I think you and I have touched upon this before in a different capacity but I do find that maybe I care less about things than I used to which is kind of nice and freeing but then I also worry about things other things more yeah nice and free my anxieties got worse yet I care less about stuff yeah not sure how that works well I think anxiety is about things that maybe are either stuff that hasn't happened yet or things you outside of your control you know whereas caring about things what i'm referring to is like caring about what people thought of me

caring about true you know how i looked or something and all of that now it's like oh i'm really worried about being alive when the world ends i'm worried about those rising sea levels. Yeah. Do you want to hear some fun little tidbits about the day you were born? Yes, please. Well, we've been talking about inspiring women. And I am one.

Thank you. You are one. talking about inspiring women. I know I am one. Thank you. You are one. So you are of the ranks of other inspiring women who were born on your day as well. Except I Googled like three different ways, like women born, famous women born on this day, and it refused to only give me women. So I just picked a couple. One being, and a big one, Rosa Parks, who I think doesn't need any introduction. Oh, wow. We touched upon her in, I think, one of our first episodes of the season because we talked about Ruby Bridges and Rosa Parks was kind of a little bit before that.

Yeah. Betty Friedan. Who is that? Betty Friedan. Whom is that? She's like kind of one of the – not worlds, but like a first feminist really or like first author to talk about kind of like modern feminism. She published The Feminine Mystique and had some other important things that I studied her in school and cannot remember and chose not to Google further. But one thing I did Google was she also died on her birthday slash her birthday.

No way. Yeah, no, no. Oh, my God. So that's kind of a weird full circle. Constance Markovich. Same old. She is the first female elected to British Parliament parliament which is kind of a big deal um and the first female to be elected as a cabinet minister in europe like not just england but in europe um she was sentenced to death for her role in something called the easter rising but

she later got pardoned for it so good well and then uh natalie imbrlia, who is best known for her cover of the song Torn. I did not know that was a cover for a very long time. Me neither. I was just going to say for a lot of people listening today, it might also be, you know, they're today years old when they learned that that song was a cover. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Thought I saw a man brought to life he was warm yeah i um don't think i've ever actually even heard the original just because why would i no i don't think i have either um

no i did really like really like that song when i was younger and Natalie and Brulia and all those women are very sort of um humanitarian and uh cool um and you know that's because they're Aquarians I think it that's probably it because a few more facts for you uh people born on February 4th are good organizers and very loving. From a website somewhere, this is what it said. Okay, fine. Very loving, but also not willing to sacrifice your freedom for anything. You're honest and you only like to deal with honest and straight people, not like straight as in not gay, but just like straightforward people. I'm a massive homophobe. Yes, you might be, but I don't think that's true for everyone born on this day. You're confusingly logical and pay attention to detail, but also somehow have an unrealistic

nature and won't listen to advice because you believe you're better than other people. Sounds pretty accurate. Yeah. You're fickle and impatient. You can be impulsive, cynical, and easily distracted from your work. And you often overextend yourself because of your aim to impress others. Yeah. Sounds pretty spot on. For your 35th year, I think you can look forward to kind of your year year you're going to be blessed with luck and have a path of progress and good fortune and because you're it's new moon in aquarius right now which is like your new moon um apparently the world is your oyster so anything you want to achieve this is your moment this is my moment awesome yeah okay well i'll go and grab life by the

ball shall i do it or the um oops i mean whatever the labia yeah yeah there we go let's grab life by the labia i know we spent a lot of time talking about horoscopes for the episode around my birthday, you know, but I just want to reiterate again how interesting it is when people talk about like, here's about me and how like so fitting it can seem for people. But I've thought about people who like what their horoscopes are. And I'm like, that's not that personal. Like I have a couple of friends who were born in around the time me and our cancers. And'm like you're not a cancer you're nothing like me and i am epitome of cancer but it depends on what their uh moon rising yeah and yeah like their cusp sign right yeah like if you're really close to the other part of the zodiac but yeah but like so for example i am so my sun sign is the is aquarius obviously right my moon sign is capricorn

and my rising is gemini and your rising is what you show to the world, apparently. So, like, people would assume that I'm a Gemini because of how I... No, Geminis be crazy. Geminis do be crazy. A lot of people would tell you that I'm a crazy bitch. I guess you haven't, like, slashed my tires or anything yet, so. Oh, yeah. Give it to me.

Yeah. Well, my son and my rising are cancer, so. Oh, really? Pretty straight cancer all the way through, I guess. The most cancer a cancer can get, yeah. And my moon is Gemini so there's that so goals for this year we've already talked about kind of in terms of your resolution but now that you are fully 35 closer to 40 have you had any new insights or realizations, or anything?

I guess sort of my impending mortality is more, you know, that's more prevalent now in my mind. So, yeah, just wanting to live life to the full really live my best life live each day as it as if it's my last yolo um or as the youths are saying now apparently do it for the plot is like the new yeah do it for the plot like plot line so like yeah no regrets just you're the main character yeah do it for the plot right right okay fine yeah i'll do it for the plot i did some yoga for the plot because my bones hurt and i did tonight i did some yoga for the plot because my bones hurt. And I did tonight. I did some yoga for the plot. Because my joints hurt.

My bones. So, I came across this post and just thought it was quite interesting a new study has revealed that prehistoric women hunted just as often as men

and their anatomy I always want to say autonomy anatomy made them better suited for it interesting in what way so made them better suited for it. Interesting. In what way? So, it goes on to say,

yabba-dabba, what can't women do? Okay. Well, you know, I think they had to. They had to do that. I'll allow it. So, for decades, scientists believed that early humans had a strict division of labour. The image of prehistoric men hunting while women gathered and cared for the children has dominated our understanding of early humans. New research has uncovered a history of women hunters

questioning the evidence behind that long-held assumption. In fact, regardless of maternal status, women hunted in almost 80% of foraging societies. Fossil evidence suggests that men and women had the same hunting injuries, not to mention women's biology was built for hunting with higher levels of estrogen and an endurance-promoting hormone perfectly suited for long-distance hunting. Also, female burial sites included hunting tools, but historically, when archaeologists found the tools or weapons in a female's grave, they assumed it was her husband's or that it was a ceremonial symbol of her place in the clan.

a ceremonial symbol of her place in the clan. You have an honorary degree in hunting. Couldn't be that it was hers. That would be too obvious. Researchers even found that women may have rivaled males when it came to taking down big game, but historically scientists have dismissed females hunting prowess because of researcher bias this groundbreaking research highlights the crucial role that women have played in society and the sources hunt women the hunter research led by sarah lacey an anthropology professor at the University of Delaware.

I mean, I think that we all know that like some of the gender roles and kind of norms and traditional roles of like male head of household and whatever, that's all pretty new and social construct so if there was no society or like kind of um urbanization going on then they were all pretty collective like wandering cultures like they're not going to have those same constructs and so there's not going to be any reason for them to be I hunt, you take care of children. Ugh. Exactly. And a lot of tribes actually regard women in higher status than men because we are the giver of life. Yeah. Hence Mother Earth and, you know, all that shit.

Because we can do everything men can do but also give birth and also bleed for a period of time and not die so just saying we can bleed for a week every month without dying so what men have you seen do that sorry i feel like we we always slag off men at some point during our episodes. I'm really sorry. I love men. I do. I don't mean to do it.

It just happens. It naturally comes out. It's not your fault, men. But because of the patriarchy, I'm sorry, but like it is you. We have the right to vent about our bosses because if we didn't we would probably go mad so but all of us like the the way things are structured that's because of not you and i you and i are perfect obviously we would never but like years ago um but i do think it's interesting when they say it's like researcher bias has basically led us to believe that all the things

that exist in our society that are completely made up and like not really rationally it's all arbitrary oh yeah that existed back then too when literally none of those things existed yeah go to hell yeah so yeah it's just the unfortunate way society has influenced us all, but fuck men. I watched Barbie. Oh, finally. Great. What did you think? To be honest with you, I think because I've heard so much hype about it, I was expecting it to be

much better than it was. And it was good. It had a good message, but I'll be honest, I feel like it was more about Ken than it was Barbie. Yeah. It was a good message, but I'll be honest, I feel like it was more about Ken than it was Barbie. Yeah. Do you know what I mean? It was all about his struggle. Yeah, I don't think they passed any sort of,

I can't remember what that test is, where it's like how many times can women talk about anything other than the men or something like that. There's a scale for it. I'm kicking myself that I can't remember because I know what it is. But yeah, I had like no one like awareness of what it would really be about other than i was supposed to be so good so i think because of like not knowing what to expect but also thinking it was supposed to be good i was just kind of like it was fine it was good it's kind

of weird like why was colin farrell the head of mattel that confused me but you know yeah yeah yeah but what i did like was there was loads of like unknown british actors in it like all of the cast of sex education yeah all the cast of sex education there's like a few sort of comedic actors that have done their own sitcoms and things but wouldn't be known to sort of american audiences and i quite liked that i was like oh my god it's him yeah no i know i like spotted a lot of kind of oh yeah that guy from that one thing and i think like as far as the acting goes like they did a good job too oh yeah that's good yeah yeah Margot Robbie is super hot so she can true can't deny that cannot deny that um you were gonna tell me some things about what my fellow Americans say, right?

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. So it starts off with a post from Richard Osman, who's actually, he's an author and a TV presenter. He's a very clever guy in England. And he's tweeted, just explain to a delighted american that we call crosswalks zebra crossings then she asked what we call crossing guards and i said lollipop ladies and now she thinks i just made the whole thing up i mean those are very whimsical names for very standard things right if only we could name everything something so like cute like that you know like let's call let's call the electric chair the buzzy wuzzy chair make it kind of nice for people yeah well i think you do like aubergine is an eggplant

just because it's but that's not cute. It looks like an egg and it's a plant. And it's a plant. I mean, but I would argue that aubergine makes it sound fancier and like a little bit more posh than, oh, yeah, I'll have the eggplant. Thanks. Thanks. Well, I think it just makes it sound a little French, know yeah i'll have i guess i'll have the aubergine parmesan that's kind of weird to say parmigiana reggiana yeah but you guys don't call it eggplant parmesan do you guys even have like

the equivalent the over like you know i mean It's like breaded sauce and cheese. Oh, yeah. I made one the other day, actually. Did you call it aubergine parmigiana? Yeah. Oh, okay. So you guys just are fancy. Yes, we are.

Yes, we are, Kate. Yes, we are. Don't know if you know, but we invented this language, actually. Another one is, what do you call wood wood lice wood louse or is that not what you call them so you don't know what i'm talking about one of these no i the only reason gross first of all um oh god it makes no they make my i don't know um roly-poly i think probably is what we call those things What? I don't know

That's what we call forward roll Yeah well that's what they kind of do They roll up But I'm seeing on this thing you've showed me That Roly Poly is on here Yeah I've just never Yeah But you call them woodlouse?

Yeah. What's a cheesy wig? I don't know, I've never heard that. Cheeselog is what people in Reading call them. A charlie pig is what people in Norfolk call them. I didn't even know there were different names for these. I just thought everyone called them woodlice, woodlouse. Granny grunter?

Like, ew, what are you doing to my granny granny grey a gromper pig a bobbling Andrew you know what someone's gonna have to remind me if there's a particular name that i didn't say for these little buggy buggy guys because i i feel like roly-poly but i also don't know if that's actually just because i read that that's what people call them somewhere and wanted

to adopt that roly-poly i wouldn't even know what you're talking about if you said that what are you going back to gymnastics like stay on your feet old lady so this next one is i feel like i can very specifically talk about this yes please do so the caption is yesterday i learned that minnesotans called doing donuts in a car whipping shitties and i again must insist we shut down that state until we can figure out what's going on so um what's your reaction to that first i like it i like it but what do you call them donuts yeah okay so where i grew up in the iowa south dakota nebraska tri-state area we also called them donuts um but i feel like i heard whipping shitties before i moved to Minnesota so it that must have bled in somewhere across the U.S. yeah and having

like I knew instantly what that person was talking about like it didn't even like it wasn't even a question for me but like in hindsight I feel like that is a weird thing to call it yeah I mean if I heard someone say it without context I wouldn't know what that was. Yeah. Whipping shitties. Whipping shitties. I also think people would call whipping a shitty as taking a U-turn. Yeah.

That makes a bit more sense. But why? Why does that make more sense? I have no idea. Whipping shitties. I don't know. I can't explain to you why. I think donuts make sense because you're going around in circles and making the shape of a donut.

Of a donut. Yep. Yeah. But I disagree about shutting the state down because, like, there's a lot of things here that are really great. Even if they say whippingoping shitties. It's a bit of an overreaction, isn't it? Yes, sir. Calm down.

Calm down, Barry. Are we doing the next one? Yeah. What do you call them? Well, I know what you guys call them. And I think, like, this would just be a popsicle still. Like, I don't know if we have a special name for these. Maybe push popsicles?

Yeah, I think we call them ice pops. Or a freeze pop? Yeah. Yeah. So why not an ice lolly? Is that different? Yeah, that's like a lolly on a stick. That you are licking like a lollipop?

Yeah. It'd be like a frozen lolly, but on a stick. So like a lollipop? Yeah. Like a frozen lolly, but on a stick. So like a twister or something. Yeah. Something like that. Okay. For people at home, it's the colorful stick popsicles that come fully encased in plastic. And you cut the top off and you push it up and you suck it. And there's grape, lemon, or lime strawberry orange like you guys

would all know this if you went if you saw what we're looking at yeah yeah yeah what's the massive debate though like what do other it must be some other states call them something else then yeah uh so freeze pop peter icy Okay, Peter apparently called it an Icy, whoever these two people are debating this post, and Chloe called it a Freeze Pop. An Icy. Okay. What did you think the first time you heard Lollipop Ladies? And Zebra Crossing.

Honestly, I've heard so many things that you guys have said that I'm not sure I probably had the appropriate reactions to them, either because I was trying to be polite or I just got really used to it yeah because I get it she's like holding a big yeah she's holding a lollipop why wouldn't she be called the lollipop lady I wish we called them the lollipop ladies now it's a zebra crossing because it's stripy like a zebra that one's a little ridiculous to me but i like it just a crosswalk for us i guess like i said we don't really get whimsical about shit no i suppose not no um someone in the comments has said that they call them an otter pop for the ice yes yep that is i've heard that and thinking like, oh, what's an Otter Pop?

That sounds great. Can I have one? And then they hand me one of those. And I was like, oh, I mean, thanks, but not what I was expecting. Someone else's ice blocks or Zooper Doopers. Nope. That's bizarre. And that's only your family, sir or ma'am, who commented on that.

Yeah. That's only your family, sir or ma'am, who commented on that. Yeah, again, who knew there were so many names for such a common thing? Apparently, Zooper Doopers is a brand name. So my guess is that's probably down south. Zooper Doopers. Zooper Dooper. Do you guys really call, well, what do you call the act of running up and then running away? Knocking on a door and running away. Yeah, that's it? You just say that? You don't have a game?

No, I call it Knockdown Ginger. That's genuinely what it's called. What? Knockdown Ginger? Yeah. what it's called what knock down ginger yeah that's that's the like universal name for this game in england what did ginger do to you why ginger i don't know i don't know why is it because you guys hate red you hate red so much but then the caption says i thought everyone in the uk called it knock down ginger no apparently someone calls it nicki knocki nine doors

which might be worse than knock knock ginger but but someone else calls it chappy chappy. Chappy. Freaking chappy. Yeah, no, this is, I think, pretty consistently ding-dong ditch in the United States, which actually makes sense if you think about it, because you're ringing the doorbell and running away. Yeah, okay, fine. Not chappy, not knock-knock ginger, not Nicky Knocky Nine Doors. It's Knock Down Ginger or Knock Knock Ginger. That one is where you've got me for sure. Because like the lollipop lady, zebra crossing, I can see those things.

I understand that conceptually and And how you got there. No, I don't either, to be honest. Maybe they used to only do it to ginger people. I don't know. Because you guys hate gingers. I'm pretty sure that's what it was. But knock down because they answer and you push them over and then you run away. That's got to be it.

That's it. Brilliant. The last few are, like, describe these photos. So first one, I'm going to try to guess what I – you can guess what we call it. I'll guess what you call it. First one's a trolley. Yes.

Shopping trolley. Shopping trolley. Shopping trolley. What do we call it? You'd call it a a grocery basket on wheels. Okay, fair enough. A wheelie basket. Yep. No, it's just a shopping

cart. Oh, yeah, I've heard that. Yeah. I thought you had it there. And I mean, to be fair, yeah, basket on wheels. All right. Next one is for you going to be just a roll. Okay. So I'd call it a bread roll.

Yeah. But I heard people talking about this the other day, and depending on where you're from in the UK, you will call it a different thing. Okay. So where you're from is the right way to describe it then, is what you're saying. Yeah, I guess so.

Let me see if I can find. So some people call it a cob. A cob? A cob, so C-O-B. Like corn cob? Yep. Okay. Okay.

Tea cake, barn cake, barra, a softie, a bread cake, a bap, a bun, morning roll, stottie. Bun is fine, yeah. Muffin, oven bottom. What? Roll. That is not a muffin, though. Like, I just. No, it's not a muffin.

You're right. It's definitely not a muffin. But yeah, there's like so many different names for bread rolls who knew what would you call it i think roll maybe a bun depending on if i'm like putting making it like a sandwich otherwise like there's a place here that makes really good tea cakes they're called american tea cakes and it's literally just like sweet ass bread but i i like to take yeah i okay well do you guys have hot cross buns out there yeah they're really popular easter yeah um i'm not a fan but yeah we do oh i don't think it's common yeah Yeah, Shonda's too. And I'm like, raisins. Delicious.

Currants. They're really delicious. The other one we've already discussed, crisps and chips. I just had some in this bowl. I wish I had more. Were they frozen? Yeah, they were. Oh, nice.

And the last one, I'd call it a water fountain. Yeah, see, we're the same. Nice. Okay, but this very last thing, no. What is it? Which one? The Bondoggle Twister. Oh.

Okay, we'll have to talk about that too. I don't even know what that's actually called. Um, I don't know what that is, to be honest. It just looks like a bit of toast with egg in it. It's like, I think what I've heard it be referred to as Toad in a Hole. No, that's not Toad in the Hole. Toad in the Hole is sausages in a yorkshire pudding well we don't have either of those things here so we wouldn't have that it's the best food it's my favorite i mean we don't have yorkshire puddings anyways um no you are missing out I know and I actually do like them so so the

only thing I so what we're looking at for the listeners it's basically a bit of toast with a hole cut in the middle and an egg in it it might be egg in a basket actually because I think you're right maybe toad in a hole is gotta have like the sausage in it yeah so okay i mean i've never heard of that either um the only thing we have close to it is like uh you know a croque monsieur yeah yum it's like that i think it's a croque madame actually is the one with the egg in so So it's a cheese and ham toasty but with an egg on top. It's like a sandwich. I think egg in a basket is something I heard but I think I've

also heard people call it toad in a hole too because they probably don't realize the difference. Idiots. Yeah. People are dumb. It's good though if you like eggs and toast I mean I do like eggs and toast to be fair you probably just don't need to cut a hole in your toast

to have your eggs in it yes I think so yeah I could eat that let me know report back I love eggy bread or as you call it French toast French toast well that makes it sound fancy

like we've discussed eggy bread sounds not fancy whatsoever no it doesn't does it i do fucking love eggy bread though yeah i don't know what a boondoggle twister is either it's just i used to make them just a lanyard like it was just a weird little lanyard made out of weird rubbery, silicone-y ribbon. Yeah, plastic ribbon really, yeah. Yeah. I don't know what that's called. Alright, you ready for

an I'm by the arsehole? Yeah, let's roll. Am I the arsehole? Gotta go. Gemma's tired. I boring i yawned sorry you are the asshole baby okay this one i think is one that's quite close to our hearts not our hearts but our heart... Our heart holes. Our heart holes, yeah. Am I the arsehole for not telling my fiancé I can't have children?

So they've started with apologies for any errors in English. It's not my first language, but to be honest, it's written very well. So well done, you. So I, 29 female, have always been open about not wanting children with people from the first date. I don't want to waste my time or theirs. I met my fiance, 32 male, about two and a half years ago online. We had a lot in common, including not wanting children. He proposed four months ago and a few days ago we were at his parents' house for dinner and his mother commented about his sister who is pregnant which led to us talking about having children

when children come up i usually change the subject uh as soon as possible but before i had an opportunity my fiancee answered that we wouldn't start trying until after the wedding and after we have a house so we wouldn't have to worry about moving while I was pregnant. I was surprised, but figured that maybe he hadn't discussed not wanting children with his family, and he just didn't want to talk about it in front of them. After, when we were driving home, I made a comment saying maybe we should tell his family now that we're not having children to avoid talking about it further down the road. And then he told me he wasn't sure about being child free I was shocked I wasn't sure what to

say except to tell him that I was sure and to ask that when sorry and to ask when did he start thinking that he might want children he told me that he was never sure and that now he thinks that he wants them um i was really hurt that he lied to me because when we started dating i was very clear that under no circumstances would i want children and if he wasn't sure it wouldn't work we argued and he basically told me that he thought I might change my mind. But he didn't know that I was sterilised at 25. Lucky you. I know. So when I was 22, despite using birth control,

I got pregnant and got an abortion. Afterwards, the stress of that possibility happening again was too much and it began to take a toll on my mental and physical health. To make a long story short, after two years of looking from doctor to doctor i was able to find one willing to sterilize an unmarried childless early 20 year old woman yeah my mental health improved overnight as soon as i had as soon as i had it and when i had a date scheduled i no longer have to suffer with so much anxiety this was one and a half years before i met my fiance i never said so because it doesn't matter because i don't want children suffer with so much anxiety. This was one and a half years before I met my fiance and I never

said so because it doesn't matter because I don't want children. Now I told him that I can't have children because I was sterilized and then he got mad at me for not telling him and that he might not have dated me if he knew. He called me an arsehole and dropped me off at home and went to stay with a friend. At this point I'm not hopeful for the relationship but I am sad because I do love him but I was clear about not having children from the start because it's a deal breaker for me and what I want to know is am I the arsehole for not telling him I can't have children? I've gotten messages from his friends saying that I am, not that I worry about their biased opinions but a couple of my friends have said that I am. Not that I worry about their biased opinions, but a couple of my friends have said that I should have told him while others are on my side that it doesn't matter

that I don't want children. So am I the arsehole? There's also an edit. She says, edit, I didn't mention that I am sterile to him because it's irrelevant to the fact that i don't want children no adoption no surrogacy no step parenting i don't even want to babysit children for three minutes while someone goes to take a shit i never explicitly it never explicitly came up till now and on both our profiles we said no children i'm Not wanting children. Hmm. Ooft. Well, I will just say this. Would it have been better or avoided this whole scenario had she said that?

Probably. Up front, yeah, probably. probably but up front yeah probably but like i kind of get what she's saying in terms of i've made it i make it clear to everybody that is a potential romantic interest where i'm at so that they can make an informed decision if they're not sure if they think they could change their mind later if they do they have the information for me. It is his fault that either he wasn't honest with her or his mind changed and he thought that her mind would change too. In fact, that is something that I've had to hear and deal with over the years when I kind of started vocalizing my lack of desire to have children, the amount of people are like, your mind will change when it gets older. And I honestly, I swear to God, I was waiting for that day to come. And no disrespect to people who did have

their minds changed about that. Great. Glad that was. But for me, that never happened. And I wasn't like, I didn't think it would. And so I can see why for her it's like it doesn't actually matter whether I'm sterile or can have children because like I made it clear and you chose to continue having a relationship with me. And we never talked about it again. And he never said, hey, you know what? Kind of feel a little bit differently about kids um which he should have done if he didn't just like make the i know best and i bet she'll change her mind or i bet i can get her to change her mind once i lock it down like put a baby in her belly she'll change her mind um like pretty arrogant of him and so but on the other hand, like he could have very well did have his mind changed and was like not really ready to maybe kind of vocalize that aloud.

The fact that he said something to his parents that he did makes me feel like, no, he just made some assumptions about what he thought she would do. And that's not OK. So I don't feel like she's the asshole. about what he thought she would do and that's not okay. So I don't feel like she's the asshole, but I do think, again, this is one of those things where you might share with people so that they truly know where you're at. But do I think she has to?

I don't know. I guess I don't feel like she has to. Just might make it easier. No, I think like if you're getting to the point where you are getting engaged and you're marrying someone you should probably tell them probably at that information like that like yeah but no i agree i don't think she's an asshole for not saying it she's she's been quite explicitly clear that she doesn't want children that should be enough um but it's funny i'm on the the child free reddit sub yeah yeah and like most of the comments on this as well are all just saying how it's it's unbelievable how many men think that women will change their mind um yeah and dudes as well who like this

person i i do not understand dudes who explicitly date child-free women and then get pissed when they plan on remaining child-free there are like two billion women on this planet who want kids date one of them instead no shit what is it is it about like conquering and like yeah i don't know getting a woman to like i want to care get fill me with your seed i don't know it's weird i think maybe it's um it's probably uh uh what's the word a um ancestral biological need to pass on your genes, I guess. Yeah, I don't know. But yeah, men need to understand that women can make decisions on their own. And it's perfectly fine not to want children.

Well, and it's not about the lack of good man to raise a baby with, or like, I just, you know, I can't see myself as a mom until I meet the person who makes me like, want to be a mom. It's not really about that. It's never been about that. Like, I truly don't think I would be a good mom, of who my co-parent is and I actually think like because of that that's gonna fall on the other parent and well then cool I guess we'll just get divorced then because nothing worked out the way we hoped exactly and I actually found it really difficult when I was dating to find men that didn't want children they either already had children and didn't want more yeah but that would mean I'd have to be a stepmom which

was equally not up for yeah um but it does seem to be a growing movement now yeah i well i think it's more acceptable to talk about and also just because like all of the studies and surveys are like oh women are you know pushing off having children later because like they want to get stabilized or you know like in a position to have kids because things are so different from when our parents had kids and their parents had kids that um it's almost kind of like why would i do that like that's not going to be a good situation for anybody exactly and even the average age for people that do want kids has gone up to like i think it's like 32 33 now yeah so yeah too much life going on man too much life going on in this world and my house yeah there's too many cats screaming right now i would suggest getting a pet before you have children just yeah you know give you a modicum of responsibility and accountability to someone

other than yourself. Yep. And also you can see how your partner handles it. Exactly. See how you co-parent. Yep. Well, with that, this chaos of an episode, birthday, movie ratings, future plans, shit Americans say, lollipop ladies, and babies. There you go.

All wrapped up into one lovely big birthday bundle. Wow, that was quite an alliteration. Good job. Well, it was good seeing you. I will let you go because I know it's very late and you're tired. It is, yes. Thank you so much. I hope you have a good rest of your day.

Go and have an afternoon nap. Yeah, maybe I will will see you next time bye bye Bye.