Talking Simpsons - Talking Simpsons - Bart Gets Hit By A Car

Episode Date: December 16, 2015

Things get litigious in this iconic episode which features the introduction of two very important recurring characters, and the first appearance of Phil Hartman…

Ahoy, ahoy, everybody. Welcome to Talking Simpsons, where we should be able to run over as many children as we want to. This is the Blazertime Podcast Network's chronological exploration of The Simpsons. I'm your host, as always, Bob Mackie. Who else is here today? Wow, Bob Mackie. What?

It's got to be there. Hi, I'm Chris Antista. I'm working the stupid sounds. Hi, I'm your host, as always, Bob Mackie. Who else is here today? Wow, Bob Mackie! What? It's gotta be there. Hi, I'm Chris Antista. I'm working the stupid sounds. I'm Henry Gilbert. That's H-E-N-E-R-E-Y-G on Twitter. And today's episode, rather this week's episode, is Bart gets hit by a car. Sorry, Bart gets hit by a car. And in case you don't know what happens, Bart gets hit by a car driven by Mr. Burns, and

there's an entire lawsuit. And this episode aired on January 10th, 1991. Chris, what happened on this fable day in history? Oh, my God. Oh, my God. This week in Simpsons history, CNN overtakes ABC, CBS, and NBC in the news department during its cover of the Persian Gulf conflict. Phillips introduces the first Edge-ever digital audio cassette to the world. And John Goodman signs a three-picture deal with Universal Studios in anticipation of his

upcoming hit, King Ralph. Oh man, King Ralph. Was one of those movies that had arachnophobia? Or was that pre... No, it was King Ralph and then The Babe? And then Flintstones. What about Matinee? Matinee? I have seen it, yes.

It feels so weird to be like, a three-picture deal! A three-picture deal with this fat fellow. So this is the first Simpsons episode to be based on a Billy Wilder movie. That would be The Fortune Cookie. And Radio Bart was based on Ace in the Hole, which is so great. Such a good movie. Ace in the Hole is great. I've never heard of Fortune Cookie.

Fortune Cookie is exactly the same thing. It's about a fraudulent lawsuit with a crooked lawyer, which is what this episode is about. Is that why the episode starts out with a title for some reason? Oh, go ahead, Henry. I finally got that. It was a joke because they'd never done a title card before, and as a kid I thought, I finally get the joke now. The joke is that the episode is called Bart Gets Hit by a Car, and it flashes up on screen

right as he gets hit by a car. The pacing is, Bart gets hit by a car. Boom! I cut it out of the clip I took of it, but it starts like the Simpsons theme song, so right as he gets hit by a car. The pacing is, bark, it hits by a car. Boom, hit by a car. I cut it out of the clip I took of it, but it starts like the Simpsons theme song, so you're right, it is part of a joke, because the theme song is still going,

and he's abruptly bashed by a car. Yeah, when the title card comes up, you think, oh, this episode's called Bark Gets Hit By A Car, when will that happen? Boom, it happens. Isn't the title on the grill of Burns' dashboard, or sorry, the grill of his car? It the dashboard or sorry the grill of his car it's just a chiron on screen when it happens and also i remember because i'm a very like analytical child when i saw it was episode 23 as a kid i know i was immediately

counting like wait were there 23 this one that one that one yeah but this is episode 23 of talking simpsons then right yes it has be. This is the 23rd one. This is the 10th episode of season two, and that's the 13th of the first one. And to reiterate, Burns hits Bart with a car. Exactly. I think the boy's hurt. Oh, for crying out loud. Just give him a nickel and let's get going.

I think we should call an ambulance, sir. That whole sequence is, he's channeling the ghost of Joe Pesci from Home Alone in his G-rated Razzafrackin. That's some classic Burns just like grumbling. And this is not so long after Three-Eyed Fish that

this is again, the writers just love Burns. They're like, nope, Burns has got to be the focus of this episode. This is the best Burns episode to date he's so good at this i think it gets better after this but like this is right now me as like a simpsons fan i'm not watching anything but the first season onwards and doing this show i'm like i'm so excited to get more burns yes he's here and he's here to stay for a while and uh bart dies like like like i said 45 seconds in bart is on an escalator to heaven he does and i'm gonna throw us off for a little bit

i gotta throw us off a little bit because what we're gonna hear is bart's ascent into heaven with the absolute very very first appearance by i'd say the worst death the simpsons has ever suffered death stalks you at every turn. There it is. Death. No. Again, I'm sorry, but the first time you hear Phil Hartman is not as any of his famous characters,

but as the, I would say the voice of God, not God, but the person who speaks on your way to God. Right. Please hold on to the handrail. Do not spit over the side. Por favor,

aguántese en la baranda. No escupas en los lados. Great Grandpa Simpson! Please hold on to the handrail. Snowball! Do not spit over the side. Shh! We told you to hold on to the handrail.

We asked you not to spit over the side i love phil hartman did it give you chills hearing bill hartman's voice for the first time yes but that is in heaven yes yes well i didn't put those pieces together but just because like i forgot i didn't realize right he was in there before we saw his famous character remember there's a lawsuit happening people you could probably guess it uh but first he meets the devil bob i love i love all the conversations with the devil again at the time i was super hardcore into christianity and the devil was very real to me and seeing the simpsons treat it with such like ah fuck him yeah devil yeah who cares like you crazy that guy will kill you Over and over. But here's Bart meeting the devil. Howdy, stranger.

I'm Bart Simpson. Who the hell are you? Please allow me to introduce myself. I'm the devil. The devil. And you've earned eternal damnation for your lifetime of evil deeds, Bart. Spitting off the escalator just clinched it. Hey, I'm innocent, man.

Innocent. Great laughter. Everybody's innocent. Okay, let's just pull up your file. It's more of a wonderful visual joke because the devil sits down to a nice mahogany desk and fires up an Apple computer. It is an Apple product.

It's so great to hear Harry Shearer giving a crap about what he's doing. Harry Shearer is on fire, giving so much with all these early episodes. And if you hear him now, he's just like, I'm only here because I have to be. I don't know because of that recent turmoil with him almost quitting the show, but not

really, that they don't use him as often as his characters. It went back as far as the writer's strike, even when he would make comments about the writers, how they're making too much to complain. And they're like, well, Harry's the reason why we don't write Mr. Burns into the show anymore, because he doesn't show up at the table reads, and he doesn't cooperate. And his Burns now is like,

there is no zest. It is just an old man. Mr. Burns. Like Al Jean said during the time when he quit, he literally phones in his stuff now. He doesn't go there. Not here, Bart, they find out, the devil finds out Bart's not actually dead and is due back on Earth

on this mortal, in this mortal realm, and I love this exchange. Um, say, is there anything I can do to avoid coming back here? Oh, sure, yeah, but, uh, eh, you wouldn't like it. Oh, okay. See you later, then. Goodbye, Bart. Remember, lie, cheat, steal, and listen to heavy metal music! Yes, sir!

Goodbye, Bart! Oh, man. Okay, so, like, I feel like... He said, I just, yes, sir, and listen to heavy metal music. Yes, sir. Good boy, Bart. Oh, man. Okay, so, like, I feel like... He said, like, yes, sir to the devil. Exactly. I love that. Like, okay, so in earlier episodes, it's understood that Bart is just, like, misunderstood. He wants to do good, but he's just held back by his own brain and his own, like, genealogy,

I guess. But in this episode, it's like, no, Bart is going to hell. What's bad? He's fine with it, and he calls the devil sir. So, like, immediately he's aligned with Satan from this point onwards, which I love. So if I may make a sports reference here. Oh my god, no. The joke is that he says, you're not due here until the Yankees win the pennant.

That's a long time from now. And the pennant is what? The pennant is the thing before the World Series. The two teams in the World Series, they've won the pennant. I literally didn't know that. I'm serious. The Yankees wouldn't win the American League pennant, which is the league they're in, for a long time.

And I looked at the stats, so it had been 10, at the time of this episode's airing, it had been 10 years since the Yankees had won the pennant, and they used to be the winningest team in baseball. That's what the musical Damn Yankees had won the pennant and they used to be the winningest team in baseball. That's what the musical Damn Yankees is about. It is weird because that makes it one of the most dated references of the show.

Because it was the 1996 the Yankees won the pennant again. So it was only five years before they won it again. But then they became like the winningest evil team in the universe. Again, under George Steinbrenner, which you probably only know because of Seinfeld. Oh, yeah, that's right.

Oh, right, that's how I know about baseball. The Yankees became the winningest team in baseball again, and now they're not doing so hot anymore. So that's a dated joke there, saying, like, man, the Yankees suck, right? So Bart goes back up, and he's back in the hospital. Oh, and those are the first floorboard jokes they ever did too, right? Yeah, the rising camera panning up through.

Yeah, and then Jacques is there. He's about to get a rectal exam, I guess. I get that joke now that the glove going on the hand means butt stuff. I never even thought of that. Yeah, I didn't get that as a kid. But this episode is full of firsts. Yeah, the next first. The next first is a big one.

The first appearance of who, Bobby? Lionel Hutz. Lionel Hutz. Hey, yeah, who are you? I saw you chasing Bart's ambulance. Hutz is the name, Mr. Simpson. Lionel Hutz, attorney at law. Here's my card.

It turns into a sponge when you put it in water. Ooh, classy. I'd like to talk to you about bringing legal action against the fiend who did this to your boy. Well, the fiend who did this to my boy is my boss and besides, the doctor says it's just a bump on the head and a broken toe, nothing serious. Doctors. Doctors are idiots. There's

no telling what kind of permanent injuries he might have. You might have to wait on him hand and foot for the rest of his natural life. That's the downside. Now here's the good part. You can ching, ching, ching, cash in on this tragedy. Excuse me, Mr. Hutz.

Are you a shyster? That is a nice little girl like you, no big word like that. I had to get as much of it as possible. I love Phil Hartman so much. He was so great in everything he did. I miss seeing Lionel Hutz on the show. Every time there was a legal conflict,

it was an excuse to have Phil Hartman on the episode. Anytime you needed to go inside Hollywood holding hands with a washed-up actor, Troy McClure. Troy McClure is a couple episodes off. Oh, wow, yeah. It's coming soon. But my line of the show so far is this one.

That's the joke. Lionel Hutz's attorney at law. What's that, a broken neck? Great! It's so good. And I want to point out, Lionel Hutt is semi... I mean, he's very opportunistic, right?

And kind of sleazy. Well, really sleazy. But he's still competent as a lawyer. Yeah, at this point. At this point, I guess. He knows the rules that he can break. In the future, he would be drinking in court. He'd have a suitcase full of shredded newspaper.

He'd rename himself Miguel Sanchez. But in this episode... If that's what you think. If that is what you think. In the creation of Hutz, there were two bits here. First off, that he's named after a friend of John Schwarzwald, the writer. And that it was Mark Kirkland, the director's idea, to give him a powder blue suit

to kind of soften his edges. To give him a full ace attorney look. Or was that years off? Yeah. It's more like a 70s kind of look, right? Yeah. But, God, just also when Bart wakes up and just sees Lionel hugging the rest of the family,

like, you I've never seen before. That's just a great... It's the most... And again, I'm watching this with my dad, who's also an attorney, and, like, he's losing his shit. Like, he thinks this is hilarious. I'm sure, yeah.

I mean, he's not, like, an injury attorney, right? He was, and, like, quit to go work for the environment and, like, kind of hates people like this. So he probably knew someone like Lionel Hutz. I think he was worried about being someone like Lionel Hutz.

And also, the Simpsons monorail... The monorail episode is one of my favorites ever, but they actually took a joke from this one that how's a nice little girl, Noah? Big word like that. That's the same thing

that Lyle Landley says to Lisa. Another Phil Hartman character. Another Phil Hartman character. Yeah, wow. I love the portion of like, so they're trying to figure out what to do in the aftermath. Marge clearly doesn't want

anything to do with a shyster. It feels weirdly anti-Semitic. Is that okay for me to say? A little bit. Is that what it is? It is. It is referencing, like, I believe it's from The Merchant of Venice. I mean, I knew that, Bob.

I need to use this knowledge somewhere. I'm sorry. One of, like, the anti-Semitic-est characters ever. For sure, depending on your interpretation. I like the emergence of a self-aware Homer. Hey, Simpson, I heard heard mr burns crushed your boy if i wasn't so spineless i'd march into mr burns office right now and simpson mr burns wants you to march into his office right now i love it very good that's exactly vaudeville joke and this is the first

time that burns had clearly not remembered the other times he'd met Homer before. But this is, I think, the first time they just wrote it across the screen. The subtext was there of like, Burns does not remember Homer. And Homer just kind of rolls with the light. Watching it now, it's like, but he's on the bad end. The last time we saw Burns and Homer interact, he vowed to ruin his life. Yeah, I mean, he's like, at last we meet. That's the line.

But now Burns does not have the upper hand. He is totally fucked by whatever Homer says or he doesn't say. So you think it's that he's trying to pretend it's in the past? I think I remember, like, as a kid, the joke that Burns never remembers Homer did not kick in for me in this episode. And I think if you're thinking about it too much, you can see why. But yeah, he offers Homer a settlement for Bart's injuries. My attorneys have advised me to pay you for running over your child,

so I'm cutting you a check. Really? Great. Hey. $100. Of course, you'll have to sign a waiver relinquishing your rights to sue and so forth. Really a formality. $100.

It was a very generous offer, sir, but medical bills are low. Oh, so extortion is the name of your little game, is it, Simpson? Very well. Then you get nothing. I have the finest lawyers in Springfield, Simpson. Tangle with me, and I'll crush you like a paper cup.

We're really seeing Burns' weakness. So, yeah, but what they have established is the weak Burns jokes. They are in full force here. That is the top of that. And, man, I actually want to get business cards that are spun. That's just how Homer does it. So then he goes to Lionel's office. He mops his brow with the business card and it inflates into a sponge.

It's not called, I can't believe it's not a law office yet. Not yet. Is it just called Lionel Hutt's Attorney of Law or whatever? It is, but it's in the same spot. It's next to the Orange Julius, I'm assuming. They didn't realize the sign joke they wanted to do. Yes. I think that's the first time we hear Doris growl.

It is. I pointed that out. Chris, we need the death jingle. Oh, for real? Yes. Are you sure she's dead? She's been dead for like 20 years, Chris. You're positive.

I'm absolutely positive. Stop killing every kid! There it is! Dad! Because I don't know if we'll live to get to this episode. Lunchlady Doris is back, but her name is Lunchlady Doris? No, no. It's still...

They changed her name. Oh, they changed her name. They changed her name. Different voice. Yeah, Tress McNeil did it a few times, I think, after she died, which I thought was kind of disrespectful. Yeah. But they changed it.

It's a different person. I guess eventually they changed it, but Doris Grau's voice is inimitable. It is the most whiskey and cigarettes old lady voice, and they loved her so much they made her a character on the crew. A recurring character. The makeup lady. Alice? Literally Doris.

Her name is Doris. Her name is Doris again? Again, yes. Doris Brow, like she had been, her career had been as a writer's assistant through the golden age of sitcoms. Yeah. Wow.

And she had made it all the way to The Simpsons, worked with James L. Brooks, and she was one of those people they counted on in, they'd talk about her and say like in the writer's room she said that's really funny and they know like that's a good joke dude i've never been so wowed by an anecdote on here yeah she was the script supervisor which was in charge of like timing out lines and figuring out how long takes would be and things like that but like yeah like her voice is just so like distinct and great and like i love her on the criticic. She's just this sour wall

of realism that you need in your life. She's great. She's Jay Sherman's mom? She's not Jay Sherman. She's the makeup lady, Doris. There was one episode where they think she could be his mom. That's right. They also talk about on the commentary how much they miss her and also they feel bad

that they made multiple jokes on the show that made her cough. The character has to cough so she has to cough and now they made multiple jokes on the show that made her cough. The character has to cough, so she has to cough. And now when they hear them on the commentaries, like Gene and Reese, Algie and Mike Reese, the creators who were also raised on Simpsons. That's why they died, Mike. They're just reacting like,

I feel bad that I made her do all these things. They're like, she wanted to do it. She's the receptionist for Lionel Hutz, and I love this. Phone calls. Love this. Phone calls. Oh, yes. But this exchange with Lionel Hutz, and I love this. Phone calls. Love this. Phone calls. Oh, yes.

But this exchange with Homer and Hutz, great. Oh. Oh, well. Mr. Simpson, the state bar forbids me from promising you a big cash settlement. But just between you and me, I promise you a big cash settlement. My fee is 50%. 50%? You'll be getting more than just a lawyer mr simpson you'll also be getting this exquisite faux pearl necklace a 99 value as our gift to you

well i don't know you and i might have different ideas about just how big a big cash settlement is a million dollars oh i stand corrected a million bucks is a-okay so music me and you talked about this a little beforehand but like morally i think they're right to sue mr burns for all this money like mr burns killed bart is in the wrong and he has lots and lots of money and he would not miss a million dollars as the biggest proponent for tort reform here on the show uh like that's one of your uh issues chris bringing it up yeah no i i one it's i didn't i meant to calculate it because they usually do in situations like this adjusting for inflation how much is a million dollars in 1991 five million it was probably like two to three to five million okay uh yeah Look at me fucking turning up my nose at multiple millions of dollars. But he's going to take 50% of that.

No, I don't think they ever would. I don't think Homer is entitled to that, let alone they would have won it to come this close. I'm wondering how much his hospital stay would have been just based on what I know about the awful medical industry. If they didn't have health insurance? God, is this the second time we're going to go off into the show?

Sorry, I'm still trying to get mine. It's been hard. Well, I guess that's a good lead-in. Is this the first appearance of a certain doctor? It is, another first appearance. Hi, everybody. Bad nose. Your son is a very sick boy.

Just look at the x-rays. You see that dark spot there? Whiplash. Whiplash? Oh, no. And this smudge here that looks like my fingerprint? No, that's trauma. Am I going to die?

Yes, son. Homer. Wow. I do have the second part of that. Again, based on Gabor Chupo of Klasky Chupo. Well, it's interesting because Hank Azaria is doing the voice. And he was just doing a voice he made up on his head. It was not Gabor.

Ricky Ricardo. Yeah, it was a Ricky Ricardo voice. The animators hear that voice and they're like, they must be mocking or parodying Gabor Chupo, the head of Klasky Chupo, who animated the show for them. Went on to make Rugrats, your Rocket Powers. Duckman. And so they draw on Nick Riviera to look like Gabor Chupo because they think it's supposed to be. That's where it came from. But then the writers on the commentary,

when they hear that from the artists, they're like, what? No, that wasn't about him. Like, because the writers don't like Gabor. Like they quit Klasky Chupo because like we talked about it in the 13th episode of season one.abor. They quit Klasky Chupo because we talked about it

in the 13th episode of season one. There was a huge disagreement between James L. Brooks and Gabor Chupo about the first animated version of the episode, the Babysitter Bandit episode. They were not fans of Chupo.

It's only on the DVD and I was only able to find it in animated GIF form, like 10 minutes of animated GIF. It's only on the DVD and I was only able to find it in animated GIF form. Like 10 minutes of animated GIF. What's that like? It's amazing how well animated it is. I don't know. Giphycat is amazing. I need to open up my world to that.

The follow up clip to that is this is because Hutz has taken Bart to a different doctor who's not Dr. Hebert. And this is the follow up to that immediate thing we just heard. Everything's fine. Will I ever play baseball again? But I played baseball this

morning. That's right, he did. Excuse me, but Dr. Hibbert has been our family physician for years and he thought Bart was fine. Oh, Dr. Hibbert from John Hopkins Medical School. With all due respect, Mrs. Oh, Dr. Hibbert from John Hopkins Medical School. With all due respect, Mrs. Simpson, you're not a doctor.

The boy's not a doctor. I'm not a doctor. The only person in this room who even comes close is this man. Stop! You're embarrassing me. It's a cute sequence. You're embarrassing me. I'd say Riviera should have worked off each other more.

God, they're great together I would say 20 years I never got the John Hopkins joke Oh yeah How we use electricity can be smarter cleaner and greener At Electric Ireland we can help guide you there You see

our new Net Zero Hub has all you need to know about smart meter plans EV tariffs, solar panels, and much more. Making your usage clearer, your trips greener, your home cozier, and your world brighter. Find our Net Zero Hub at electricireland.ie. Until my girlfriend applied there. It's a very good school. I think Nick River went to Hollywood Upstairs Medical College

or something like that. Remember your time at med school? I can prescribe anything I want, baby. The whole point is, I guess, they're in league with Hutz at this point. Exactly, yeah. So then it goes to Burns wanting to fire Homer, which that's my

favorite joke of the episode when Smithers tells him, do you really think you should fire him? Think of the headlines. What about the headlines? He just imagines the headlines are just, smart move, another good one by Burns. And so I guess it's like, okay,

we can't fire him now, but wait until this fades away from public knowledge and then we'll fire Homer. That's again another classic Burnsism. He gives it better in the Germans episode, like the sword of Democles is hanging right above his head. And then when he least expects it, slap.

Slice. But yeah, Hutt's coaching Bart on how to fake a trial. Then we get into Hutt's coaching Bart on how to perjure himself. Now, let's pretend you're on the witness stand. How are you, Bart? Fine. Oh, fine. Isn't that nice?

Bart says he's fine. Wrong! You're not fine! You're in constant pain! I am in constant pain. Dad, may I please make an observation? Oh, what is it? I think this is all a charade to make Bart look more injured than he really is. Maybe Lisa does have a point. I don't mind you boys doing this in the living room,

but in court, doesn't Bart have to tell the truth? Yeah, but what is truth, if you follow me? What is truth? I sort of didn't like it. Yeah, that's such a good Bill Clintonism. He dismissed her immediately with no follow-up. Like, what is truth? Anyways, let's go back to what we were doing.

But it's so uncharacteristic for any Phil Hartman character to yell at all. Yeah. Like, to raise their voice. That Ron was stolen by Kevin Spacey in the Superman Returns. Ron! Ron! Billions. And this is probably a second really good

episode with Simpsons in a courtroom setting but I think they slowly find how to do that because they're in courtrooms a lot throughout the next couple seasons and this is a duo of premieres as well because it's Judge Moulton and

also Burns' lawyer the blue haired lawyer all he's known as still? Well, he's Roy Cohn, which when they were parodying Roy Cohn then, he was not a famous AIDS victim who had secret gay sex

all the time. I think it's the voice of Roy Cohn, but the character is based off of it like an old Hollywood guy. I totally forget the name. I'm sorry.

I should have came more prepared for that. So good. Perfect Burns. This is my line of the show, I think. Your Honor, my client has instructed me

to remind the court how rich and important he is, that he is not like other men. I should be able to run over as many kids as I want. Oh, man. Mr. Burns, I must warn you

that if you continue to disrupt the court in this way, I will have to cite you for contempt. You wouldn't dare. Well, no, I guess I wouldn't. That's so good.

That's a great read. That is my line of the show because that is the exact opposite that a lawyer should say at the beginning of a trial. They shouldn't. That makes a jury hate a rich person when they separate them from the common. That's the only reason I can guess that Burns is about to, in all honesty, why Burns would lose such a trial. There's no reason a million dollars needs to exchange hands. And I think it's funny, like, the dynamic has changed

so much in these early episodes in which, in the later episode, like, the Simpsons would have the bad lawyer and the bad case, but in this case, Burns is the guy who is always doing the wrong thing on the stand at every moment, every chance, yeah. And so then Burns tells, Bart tells this side of the story, Burns tells this side of every chance. So then Burns tells, Bart tells this side of the story, Burns tells this side of the story.

They're both very funny animated scenes. I know, Brett was mad at me. He was like, did you get the clip of him just saying, take me! I'm old! And I should have, but it just doesn't sound like Mr. Burns at all. It doesn't, no. He didn't know how to scream as the character yet, but I also like

that Homer, Burns takes out a paper to read from it. Like, that's great. Oh, I missed that. I must have missed that. It's Spanish Flea playing, which they mentioned in the commentary. They were only able to get that because... Actually, it's Tijuana Brass. Sorry, Tijuana Brass.

Sorry, Henry. Actually, Tijuana Taxi. Tijuana Taxi, fuck. Yes. All right. Double nerded, triple nerded. Okay. They could only get Tijuana Taxi because Jay Kogan's godfather, writer Jay Kogan, his godfather wrote the song, so they had to reach out through him to get the rights. Is he one of the Wrecking Crew?

I don't know. He could be. Well, Jay Kogan's old Hollywood. He's like a third generation writer or something. Of the Florida Terry Ogans. I mean, he wrote for Ogans. He wrote for Frasier. He did. I love how piss burns his layers.

Again, this is like uncharacteristic yelling. Oh my god, I love that. Harry Shearer just bringing it. Oh, amazing. Play this, please. I love it. They hate me? Well, what trial were you watching?

Oh, yes, settlement. Fine fine hang your heads in shame you overpriced under brand glorified notary publics just get that big ape to my house tonight and we'll buy them off with a banana or two oh i wrote the note that they they they actually do hang their heads in shame when he tells them to do it. They all hang their heads. And I don't have any clips from it. That is so mean when he says, like, buy him off with a banana or two and the reaction on Homer's face. And actually, they edited that in after the fact because originally Homer was not supposed to hear that. But the fact that he hears it makes it funnier because he knows what Burns is about now.

Yeah, totally. I didn't get any clips from this. It's one of my favorite sequences from the episode, them going to his house. And so many things... Whenever I've lost my keys, and I find them, I'm like, phony doctors, hello. I say that all the time, and just Homer's like,

I spit on his settlement. And as an adult now, yelling today at an insurance salesman, and I do it they hang up on me and then like oh yeah instant remorse like that it cuts back to the scene of after Homer spits on his chair

he's wiping it off as fast as he can I do like how mr. Burns won't even buy into the farce enough because it's like Homer's like you're trying to get me drunk are you mr. Burns he's like yes just like just like just drink and agree to this you idiot it all falls apart because uh Marge, goddamn.

Her morals. Mother, female morals. Getting one over him, he's the most evil man in the world. You can steal from him, it's fine. That's my opinion. Take his money. I'm chaotic good, by the way. Yeah, I'm on his side.

I'm dyslexic neutral. Okay. So then they call Marge to the stand, which I wrote that the audience gasped at that, which why did the court audience care? Well, because why would they make the mother testify during the trial of a lawsuit over her injured child? I guess that almost seems illegal that the mother could testify. This is a great scene.

And again, Harry Shearer gets the MVP award, but I love all the performances from Julie Kavner as Marge Shearer. Oh, really good, yeah. Like, especially her response earlier. Well, her and Dan are... I played baseball today. He did! He did play baseball today.

Her and Dan are so good in this moment. Yeah. Mrs. Simpson, could you describe for us, in your own words, thoughts... There is a part of this... Like, I don't think The Simpsons normally does that, that feels like this is a live read between two people. And I believe this was cut out for syndication. I don't remember it as much because it's just a lot of back and forth improv-y talking.

I don't know. Could you describe for us, in your own words, Bart's intense mental anguish and suffering? Well, I don't know how intense it was. Well, I guess he did miss three days of school. Oh, three days. Although he doesn't really like school all that much. No. So I guess that may not count as anguish.

No, it doesn't. It was a little hard on me having him around the house all that time. Could you put a dollar amount on all these hardships? Well, we pay Bart $5 a week to take out the trash. I suppose if he'd been able to do it that week, we might have given him the $5.

$5? But your lawyer, assuming he is a lawyer, is asking for a million! Well, we can't blame them for trying, can we? If a barge fucks up there, though, because the medical bills, like... They should just get that.

You don't know what their deductible looks like. I'm more like, $5 for taking out the trash? I took out the trash, mowed the lawn, got all the papers in a place where there wasn't an actual mailbox. It was at the beginning of the subdivision. I did so much. $5 just for that? Adjusting for inflation? About $5 a week that adjusting for inflation but yeah

Marge pretty much loses the trial for Bart Homer no money at all once again I think we get the grafted on James Earl Brooks we don't know how to get out of this ending the last couple minutes aren't great I just think I forgot about it

but I understand it my wife cost me a million dollars and like I thought it was gonna it just they have like a 90 seconds to resolve exactly and like it looks to be something really deep what is it like to resent your wife when you feel like she blew your big shot I'm pretty much reading fucking Homer's lines verbatim because this is not this clip the next one is the longest clip in talking Simpsons history my wife cost me a million dollars. Homer, would you like some more macaroni and cheese?

Yeah, a million dollars worth, you treacherous snake woman. Oh, thank you. Some string beans? No, I don't want any string beans either, you two-timing backstabbing. Uh-oh, better answer. Oh, thank you. Some celery with cream cheese on it. Just mouth-polite nothings.

Oh, thank you. I remember a fight with my parents. Like, my mom fucked up on taxes. And, like, it was a weird fight to see with my parents. It was, like, bitterness. Like, you really fucked us. It is very observational. Like, I know what it's like to want to be mad at someone, but it's, like, really hard because they are being nice to you.

Just like, God, I want to hate you, but you're not letting me. And if I had to give another line of the show, it's Marge's response when she comes to apologize for doing the right thing I apologize for doing the right thing I wrote it down I want you to forgive me for doing the right thing

and like this is if you want to hear it this is the whole end of the episode let's do it yeah I think it's a great clip because given a little more time with this

situation it says something really weird unique about Marge and Homer's relationship that he's able to tell her this right away but this is all done just to wrap the episode so it is super abrupt they are super tying a bow on it really fast this is like i was like wow this is really heavy shit this is i've

never seen a show deal with a relationship like this and like right when i had that thought you hear like this tag music yeah it's over and mo does his line. Yes. Hey, hey, guys. Knock it off. It's just my wife. Well, hello. My name is Marge. My name is Marge. Homer, I'd like you to forgive me for doing the right thing. Oh, Marge. We've squabbled over money before.

Never this much. I mean, I know this is different than that time I washed your pants with a 20 in the pocket, but I... No, no, no. You think this is about money? Well, it's not. It's worse, Marge. I'm afraid that from now on, when I look at you, I'm not gonna see the wife by my side or the

mother of my children. I'm just gonna see the dame who blew my one big chance. What are you saying, Homer? I'm saying she's been your wife for ten years. You've had three children together. It's time to be honest with her. I'm not sure I love you anymore.

But don't worry, I'll never let her. I'll still do all the bad stuff. Maybe it won't be so bad. Oh, my Lord. I don't want to wait another minute to find out whether you love me anymore. I think that you should look me in the eyes and find out. No. Homer, look at me.

All right, all right. It's all right. It's all right. Good. Good, Homer, good. This is tough. Need refreshment. Oh, good old trustworthy beer. Good. Good, Homer, good. This is tough. Need refreshment. Oh, good old trustworthy beer.

My love for you will never die. Anyway, got to look at the wife straight in the eyes and tell her. Oh, who am I kidding? I love you more than ever. I love you, too. Sorry to scare you like that, babe? I love you more than ever. I love you too. Sorry to scare you like that, babe. Okay, everybody. For the next 15 minutes,

one third off on every picture. I would really love... Oh, wait, you missed the rest of that joke. I want my customer domestic beer only. Hey, no sharing. As a beer drinker, I find that joke. Here we go. I want my customer domestic beer only. Hey, no sharing. As a beer drinker, I find that offensive. No sharing. 30% off a pitcher of Budweiser that you can't share.

Only domestic. Yeah, I now know the difference between domestic and imported. Yeah, I think they overworked on there. They're like matching many things. I also have a continuity issue here. In a couple episodes, we're going to find out that Barney went to the same high school as Marge and knew her. But in this scene, he reacts to Marge like, oh, who's this? I'm Marge.

I assume Barney is too drunk, maybe. We could pass it off as that. I also, like, if we could pick this up on audio, let me see. I scare you like, if we could pick this up on audio, let me see. You scare me like that, babe. The first person to start yelling in the background is Barney. And what I wouldn't give for, like, raw audio, let me turn it up as much as I can. Okay, everybody. I remember during the commentary, Mike Reese is, like, upstairs, like, why does he love her more than ever?

It doesn't make any sense. I have a good answer for that. Why is that? Well, I can be a combative person. Hi, Henry. He has to see me every day. And I occasionally yell at, I don't get in fights a lot. And I know there are certain times when my girlfriend wants to fight with me. And I'm like, I just won't fucking hear of it like I'll just walk away but there are other times you get like

I'm getting this out and I'm gonna say this and I don't care what the fuck you think I don't care what you think at all I need to say this and I there's been I've been up against the brink of like that point where you break a relationship like forever and like I do get the Homer Simpson internal monologue it has it has happened to me like once a year for like once a year once a year we're like if i don't shut up right now if i don't stop saying this and like you can see what homer's saying like i don't know if i can love you anymore and i do come to my senses it could be like the euphoria of a fight being over and things being okay again you know like we can put all this behind us and now we're gonna start

over it just it's just more like because again i can put all this behind us and now we're going to start over. It's just more like, because again, I did not have this as a younger man where like, I'm really going to throw all this away over winning an argument. And I don't know. I related to the scene.

I think it's abrupt. I don't think it's great. Yeah, it does. I think it feels like a James L. Brooks rescue mission, but at the same time, like, it's not the worst ending. It just feels like out of touch,

out of tone with the rest of the episode. Structurally speaking, it's a weak weaker ending to a very good episode It happened recently just where like I am really mad and I still like I'll tell you right now feel perfectly justified. The look on her face

looking that sad and like really like everything else is worth me letting her know I'm mad about this Like I was completely in the right like fuck it it's over it's all love you babe oh also to let you know how uh how over works the animators were on this that mark kirkland the director said he pushed himself so hard that he he was he thought he was just sick the entire time and then the doctors revealed

to him he had walking pneumonia oh god the entire time he was making the show, and he was on the verge of death. So he— I think he had to go up several flights of stairs to go between the writers and the animation team. Just back and forth, like, do you like this better now, guys? No, draw this better, stupid. Poor animators to a writer-driven show. Make it a pie.

Pie is easier to draw. So, yeah, that's been Talking Simpsons, everybody. As for me, I'm your host, Bob Mackie. You can find me at BobServo on Twitter. I also run the Classic Gaming Podcast Retronauts and I write for US Gamer

and Something Awful. Check out those sites to read my stuff. Everybody else. Wow, Bob Mackie! I feel so good every time. I love it. Well, I mean, this is

brought to you by the Patreon for Lasertime.com, the LasertimePodcast.com, which is the home of all of our podcasts. And if you want to hear our thoughts on the first season of The Simpsons, that is exclusive to people who pledge $5 or more a month on the Patreon. You can find it in there and download them. And also, I do the comic book podcast, Cape Crisis, every week. Give it a listen. And I do the Lasertime show laser time podcast.com i wish

i had something more specific to plug you can follow me on twitter cantista odds are i won't reply oh that's too bad but we'll see you next week with a brand new episode of talking simpsons everybody have a good one take it easy I'm I'm I'm I'm