Talking Simpsons - Talking Simpsons - Brush With Greatness

Episode Date: February 17, 2016

Marge discovers a lost talent and love for Ringo Starr as Homer loses weight, plus Bob, Chris, Henry, and Dave learn a lot about Burns’ genitalia…

This week's episode of Talking Simpsons is brought to you by Geek Fuel. Go to geekfuel.com slash lasertime to sign up for a box of geeky goodies sent to you directly. And if you sign up through geekfuel.com slash lasertime, you will get an exclusive Star Wars item worth $20 added to your first box. Ahoy, ahoy, everybody. Welcome to Talking Simpsons, where Ziggy never wins. I am your host, as always, Bob Mackie. Who else is here today? Chris Antiston. Henry, H-E-N-E-R-E-Y-G on Twitter, Gilberts.

I'm Dave Rudden, and I want to go to Mount Splashmore. And today's episode is Brushed with Greatness, and it aired on April 11th, 1991. Chris, what happened on this historic day? Oh, boy, Bobby! The Game Boy has just been released in Japan. Natalie Schaefer, better known as Lovey Howell, becomes the third Gilligan's Island cast member to die in two years. And Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2, The Secret of the Ooze,

is the number one movie in America. America's stupid. Ninja, ninja. Wait a minute. You are not allowed to take a hipster stance on Ninja Turtles in this. Oh, no. You were there. Literally, I was in a theater watching it. You were totally in a theater.

Eating Goobers. Ninja. I just came from Pizza Hut, probably, eating the pizza the turtles told me to eat. Yes. And eating the pudding pies and everything. And the Game Boys launch in Japan, that was, we had no clue. Just to imagine a system launching in Japan that American consumers had no idea of. And was it three Gilligan's Island members dead in two years? She's the third Gilligan's Island cast member to die.

But the first one died two years ago. And then they all went really fast. And then there was like one left alive. Mary? Ginger? I think it's Ginger. Ginger and Marianne are the only ones still with us. Everyone else is dead. This is how our parents feel, how we feel now with Alan Rickman and David Bowie

and all these... Except there was Alan Hale. Ladies and gentlemen, Alan Thicke is dead. Alan Rickman is so much better than Alan Hale. Yes. Alan Rickman never hit anybody with his head. That we know of. Oh, he never called anyone lovey. Lover.

So this episode is basically about Marge coming to terms with her art skills that she kind of abandoned. And also I feel like there's been two episodes in a row without Burns, really. Yeah. And now they can finally embrace Burns again. I felt like a lot of anxiety in the writers. Like, oh, we need to write about Mr. Yeah. And now they can finally embrace Burns again. I felt like a lot of anxiety in the writers. Like, oh, we need to write about Mr. Burns. I mean, we kind of shoehorned into the previous episode with Grandpa. That's right.

Where he's just like, he's rivaling for $100,000 or whatever. So they found one contrived scene to work him into. But in this episode, it's almost entirely about Burns and his ego and how he wants that reflected to the world. And also, Homer needs to lose weight. That too. You will find out how I don't do any Beatles impressions except for one. This one. I hung it on me wall.

You'll get to find out why I say that. Peace and love. I'm surprised you didn't say that. Have you seen that video where he's like, I'm not saying anything anymore. Peace and love. Peace and love. I just watched that John Lennon documentary for some reason. I couldn't believe how much of a statement they thought they were saying every time. Peace. love. Peace and love. I just watched that John Lennon documentary for some reason, and I couldn't believe how much of a statement they thought they were saying every time.

Peace. Love. World peace, man. Just saying the word will make it so. It was new-ish then. It was. I don't mean to... Henry, I didn't listen to the commentary again, and I don't have time for this,

but I know there's a story on it about one of the writers not getting the memo, like, don't talk to Ringo. You have to leave him alone. What was that about? So this wasn't written by one of the writers not getting the memo, like, don't talk to Ringo. You have to leave him alone. What was that about? So this wasn't written by one of the main Simpsons regular writers. It was written by Brian K. Roberts. Yeah, Brian K. Roberts, who was like a writer's assistant on the show or something. And this was his big break.

I also believe that with a show that's part of the Writers Guild, like every year you need to take two scripts that are from freelancers in order to like sustain like the industry yes one of the union deals so he so they give it to him and in it he wrote uh originally he just wrote a dream sequence where ringo star shows up and he's a big ringo fan and uh and then he gets to write him into the show and ringo being a megastar and one of the most famous people on earth i'd say yeah very understandably has the rule of like i'm gonna come in please you know don't don't fan out don't be asked for autographs let's just be normal and professional and uh brian says he did not get the memo because he was not high enough level and so he just showed up with like hey it's a couple albums could you sign them and he said uh ringo did sign them.

He was nice enough and signed them. But everybody else was just glaring at him. I'm like, why are you bringing this? We finally got a Beatle on the show. I don't know. To this point, the most famous person that had ever been on The Simpsons. He's the fourth most famous Beatle. He is, but he's the first in getting all the living Beatles on The Simpsons.

Which is Matt Groening's goal. I don't want to turn this into just knocking Ringo Starr forever. Like, look, fine. Is he the worst beetle? Sure. But... We do hear it don't come easy, which I'm ambivalent towards. It's like being the worst Nobel Prize winner. Also, it's kind of ironic that his

rules for peering on The Simpsons are contrary to the way he is in this episode, which is very gracious to fans. And only answering their questions. I hung it on me wall. We'll get to that. It is funny how they diss Ringo a few years later. Like, Ringo's competent drumming or whatever.

I thought you introduced yourself with a shameless promotion as a reference to the opening of the episode. I want to go to Mount Spice more. Take me, take me, take me, take me now. Now, now, now, now, now. Mount Spice, I'll take you there right now. Yay! This is a rather shameless promotion.

It worked on me. Sorry, I do love Krusty screaming, now, now, now, now. He looks like Jim Morrison or something. I think they also realized, oh, Krusty's good filler on this thing, too. Krusty's a funny dude, but there's no reason for them to be Krusty Munchers.

I remember this episode well. I just never associate it with the Mount Splashmore episode, which I find way more memorable than a lot of other things. That is true. It did inspire part of a virtual Bartz. Virtual Bartz, when you're going on the water slide. The one okay segment, maybe? Yeah. None of them are good.

The eggs, where you shoot the eggs. Oh, the tomato? Oh, it's eggs, I think, the second level. On MLG, I got there. I never went that far. Yeah, I never played that game. I knew it was bad, but Mount Splashmore, the joke of the product, well, not product placement, but the on-location thing of a kid's show.

Like, I didn't get this when I watched this. I probably, in the same week as this, then watched a TGIF episode of them in Disneyland. Like, yeah, Disney does look fun. When Disney bought ABC and everybody, everybody within two years had a two-part episode set in Disneyland, including Roseanne where the Connors are dirt poor, and took 13 people to Disney World, including the resorts, which is like $800,000. But then they treated Disneyland like a cult.

People were being held captive there or something. I feel like this is, even though Krusty is being a hardcore shill, this is kind of referencing more innocuous stuff, where it's like, wild and crazy kids is at Funtime USA, whatever. If there's still any local programming in the universe, I don't know. But yeah, your local TV show host would probably open up the water park.

Local water parks are more varied. There's more of those than just these. But they're making the on-the-nose joke with Krusty. With fresh fruit and the most delicious melon. Oh, he ate two of his plots. And of course, the thing I'm going to miss most is those special, special mountain splash more water slides. God bless him.

So much fun. So many memories. Give me a minute. It has been a great week, hasn't it, Lisa? I hope all you kids come out this weekend and really pack this place just to show them how grateful I am. I told them you would. Don't make me a liar

and so bart and lisa employ the same strategy they use to get a pool it's the same joke but i love it because they keep flashing between these different scenes and it's great and marge i think even is smirking towards the end like smirking and hiding from it yeah like she thinks it's funny No No No No No No If I take you Will you two shut up And quit bugging me

Yeah Of course Well Will you take us To Mount Splashmore Yes Thanks dad I guess it's water

That inspires them To do this Yeah These are all water based Like demands But Speaking of water Like one of

The more disturbing elements Is like they are Like their're dads in the shower and they're doing this. Right, yeah. They get in front of them. I think little kids probably just don't know it. Yeah. They don't think anything of it. The 8 to 10 areas where it's like, okay, you know. Maybe.

I don't have kids yet, but I grew up in Florida and I'm a giant Disney fan. I say this every once in a while, I've never been on Star Tours and everybody acts completely shocked. My parents hated taking me to these places. They made my grandparents take me to these places. They hated theme parks. They hated fairs. They hated water parks.

Didn't you think Homer looks grotesque in that outfit? Well, I mean, he's just wearing shorts, and his farmer's tan is just like bleh. But that is a setup. That is a setup. I just want to play this clip real fast.

Challenge the raging waters of death. Day to discover what water is really made of. H2O. Look at that. Look at that. I had that last bit as my ringtone. And when I was a kid, I did not get the, when March said to Homer, that bathing suit doesn't leave much to the imagination.

Which means you can see his cock. I didn't get in the line, the giant line for the water slide, that there is one of the optical illusions. It's M.C. Escher. Is it definitely M.C. Escher? I think, yeah. Definitely not kind of. Apparently I've had too many beers to say M.C. Escher. M.C. Escher. Is it definitely M.C. Escher? I think, yeah. Currently, I've had too many beers to say M.C. Escher.

M.C. Escher. He's a great DJ. When you talk about going to things in Orlando, Chris, I think you and I are the only ones who've been to the Springfield in Orlando and not on the Simpsons ride. I've been on the Simpsons ride in Hollywood. When you're on the Simpsons ride, they're playing this clip. Any clip where they're in line

and making fun of standing in lines while you're standing in lines. It's really weird. Wait, what am I doing? I shouldn't be in this line. Thanks, Surly. Shut up. That's in line while you're waiting. Though, same with if you eat in the Frying Dutchman, or I guess just the

food court you can get from the Frying Dutchman, Luigi's Pizzeria, or Cletus' Chicken Thumbs, and Krusty Burger. You need one of those four things. When you're sitting in the dining room, they're playing dining room scenes around you all the time. Any time they ate in a diner in the first place. Disparaging the very thing that's on your cell phone. I was going to say, they're all about how bad the food is. And I still don't know.

We were at Universal Studios three years ago, and they were out of Bort license plates. And I don't know if they exist and sold out immediately, because why wouldn't they? I bought one. But there's a slot for... Oh, so you did buy one. Yeah. So there is a slot for Bort license plates. Now, it's...

Guys... Universal. If you're a Simpsons fan, you owe it to yourself. Like, look, Universal is not the greatest theme park. Disney is better overall. But if you're a Simpsons fan, you have to at least once see Springfield, USA. Either in Universal Hollywood or Universal.

I think I need to go at some point. I call it the island of misfit IP. Hey, who likes the mummy, Curious George, Shrek, the Simpsons? No one! No one likes all these. That's ridiculous. Disney seems way more unified. But Homer gets stuck in a slide, and I love this clip.

Looks like there's a jam in Delta Second. Oh, it's too big to be human. I'll send down a few kids. That's a dislodgement. It's the first appearance of the squeaky voice teen as the slide operator. Oh, you're right. But he's not pimply at all. No, he's not.

He's not the same character, but the voice. It's the premiere of the voice. This situation seems like hell. this gives me anxiety watching it i was like oh this is a nightmare for me being trapped i i watched that movie the descent about you know crawling through little the caves and stuff and it it terrified me that part the most and so yeah and just being trapped in there and having those kids just like just flesh shoved in your face while you're trapped in there. I think this is the beginning of those Simpsons plots.

I would delight in as a kid that the first five minutes of the show are not what the show is about. Yeah, it's always like, where will this take me? If you don't know what the premise is. What it does is inspire Homer to diet. Yeah. I'm going on a diet. From this day forward, I pledge there will be no pork

chop too succulent, no donut too tasty, no pizza too laden with delicious toppings to prevent me from reaching my scientifically determined ideal weight. As God is my witness, I'll always be hungry again. We're gone with the wind. Don't shut up. That was like three episodes ago in Principal Charming they did this. It's funny it took them 30 episodes to get to a Homer on a diet episode.

And it's the B-plot! Yeah. I think it is the first time Homer's ever thought about being fat. Yeah. It's never really been talked about before. And they did make him, in this episode, he's officially grotesquely fat. Where he has not been before. I think one of my, if I had a choice of frames of animation

I could buy for The Simpsons, when Homer is airlifted out in that tube and they point him towards the screen, he's just got this dull look on his face. I just love that look on his face. And I am trying to buy a Simpsons animation, so it is not easy. Apparently, they're mostly stolen.

Yes, they talk about that on the commentary. There was a joke, a sign joke I missed as a kid, too. When Maggie is in the kiddie pool, when it's taking him to the little kiddie pool, it says, water changed hourly. Oh, yes. Babies are peeing in it.

This was a South Park episode, and it's haunted me on public pools ever since. Everybody pees in it. Just everyone pees. I never did. I want to say that. I don't think I ever did. I've peed in the ocean.

But it's why it's just like this is already filled. Have you done a Frankie? No. I've only number one. It's a Florida term for taking a shit in the ocean. I've only number one. I would never number two. So, like, I had a public pool that we went to every summer.

There was a huge regular pool and there was also the kiddie pool and sometimes we just be like oh yeah we've had fun in the regular pool let's just like we'll just like do like kind of slip and slide stuff in the baby pool like oh yeah no you're talking because everything was so smooth yeah rounded and but it's also like why is this warmer the water is is much warmer. And I don't know if that's because there's babies in there and it needs to be like that, or if that is literally baby piss. I have so many fond memories of an unsafe 80s water park that was blown down in Hurricane Andrew. Six Flags Atlantis, or just Atlantis.

Talk to me on Twitter if you remember. Also, the thinner the water is, the easier it is to heat. There's that, too. So the sun might just warm it up more. That simple science. But again, this is all a device to get us to the attic, where Homer tries to get his weights out, and we discover that Marge, what? Homer is 260 pounds.

I think you couldn't call that fat on a TV show now. Not anymore. You'd have to be more extreme than that. I might be slightly overweight, but like... I'm 250 pounds. What was the episode? Was it Homer's Night Out where he be slightly overweight, but like... I'm 250 pounds. What was the episode? Was it Homer's Night Out where he's like, 239 pounds? I'm a whale.

I'm a whale, yeah. Was that Homer's Night Out? Yeah. So he's gained weight since then. Yeah, I think so. He's gained 21 pounds. I just want to quickly give a shout out. Back at Mount Splashmore, a rare Yardley Smith non-Lisa voice.

Really? When Homer is the line inspector and he's bumping past everybody. God bless that man. Is that her? It's a really hideous background character too. They would not use that design again. It's one of those times where it's so clearly yardly that you're just like I'm going to do this.

We get to the attic and Homer discovers that Marge used to paint things. Hey, who's the mop top with the big schnoz? Don't you know anything, boy? That's Ringo Starr. What is this? Hey, your mother must have painted this. I guess she thought he was kind of cute.

What? Hey, what the? Marge! No, Homer, don't be jealous. I was a schoolgirl. The Beatles were very popular. I had a crush on them. Likely story. Why is that a likely story, Homer, don't be jealous. I was a schoolgirl. The Beatles were very popular. I had a crush on them. Likely story.

Why is that a likely story, Homer? The last picture is of her marrying Ringo. It's basically her painting fan art. Were the Beatles still super popular in 74? So if she's 18 in 74, then she would have... They broke up in 69. And so she would have been 13. Yeah, but she could have grown up with him.

She would have kept listening to him. And his solo work began in the early 70s. Yeah, that's the song that we hear in this episode is from 1970. I have a fine young cannibal's album because I think it's the last new album my dad ever bought by a new artist. But she drives me crazy. Ooh, ooh. Yes. Okay.

I think that was the last thing he bought in the 80s. That's when he finally gave up on the 80s. Well, I think he still buys a Springsteen and Dylan album on occasion, but nothing new. So I had absolutely no idea who Ringo Starr was when I saw this. Me too. Did you guys? Me neither. I think I had some idea of what the Beatles were because my mom was a huge Beatle head

or whatever the hell you call them. I was a big fan and I drew pictures of them and then I... I hung it on me wall. Sorry. No, you didn't. I did not know then I... I hung it on me wall. Sorry. No, you didn't. I did not know. I did not know who Ringo Starr was. Yeah, much like the kids on the show, I was asking my mom, who is Ringo Starr?

We discover Marge has a painting ability, and I love the way Lisa phrases this. Oh, that's my quote of the show. Hey, Mom, these paintings are good. While I know firsthand how fragile young talent is, I'd love to hear the particulars of how your gift was squashed. That's my line of the show, by the way. I'll give it to you, Bobby. I have one later on. In a beauty contest.

That is Bob's line of the show. That's the joke. How we use electricity can be smarter, cleaner and greener. At Electric Ireland, we can help guide you there. You see, our new Net Zero Hub has all you need to know about smart meter plans, EV tariffs, solar panels and much more. Making your usage clearer, your trips greener your home cozier and your world brighter find our net zero hub at electricireland.ie what is up talking simpsons fans chris here briefly jumping in to tell you this show is

brought to you by geek fuel and if you go to geekfuel.com slash laser time right now you can get a free star wars item worth 20 just for signing up for a mystery box. What's in the mystery box, you ask? Six to eight items, an exclusive t-shirt, and a $50 value of Kit and Kaboodle featuring famous stuff from Marvel, DC, Nintendo, Zelda, Game of Thrones, Pop Figs, pint glasses, posters. You never know quite what it's going to be, but it's like a delicious geeky gift that shows up at your door whenever you feel like it and oh guess what they've had simpson stuff involved in the box in the past so go to geekfuel.com slash laser time right now sign up for one of their boxes get it as a gift for a geek in your life and get a free $20 star wars item right now so in a beauty contest wouldn't ringo be your last ranked of the beatles like

i he would be for me maybe he'd be ahead of john lennon i just think he was the first in line to be a voice in the simpsons yeah i'd say he's the most British looking, if I could go that far. George Harrison. I'm just saying, if you're a 13-year-old, if you're teenage Marge, I guess it's just who she was attracted to. But I think in a beauty contest, it would go,

for that time, Paul, George, John Ringo. Maybe Paul, George, Ringo John. Also, I think he lends himself best to cartoons in terms of visual caricature. He's a cartoonish man. Caricature, totally. We have listened to a couple of episodes where Phil Hartman pops up.

And Marge decides to go back to school. Sorry, back to an adult education course where she can be a painter. We should do that more. And we hear John Lovitz. It's going to sound crazy because I've done all the shows with you, but is this his first appearance? No, Artie Ziff. Artie Ziff. Down to the town.

But this seems like an attempt like, well, John Lovitz is another Phil Hartman to us. Yeah. He can play these tertiary characters who may or may not. This guy never came back. Nope. Do we have his name? Sorry, it's Professor Lombardo. Lombardo.

Very good. Fabulous. Oh, very good. Fabulous. Ah, even better. You have real talent. Do you really think so? My high school art teacher hated them. What? The man was a fool.

But still, one must admire the force of his conviction. Then I'm in the class? Oh, my dear, there couldn't be a class without you. Now, if you'll excuse me, nature calls. This is just John Lovitz doing the acting? Yeah, the master thespian. I feel like he knows Mrs. Winthrop from the Dog of Not Death.

I didn't get any clips of it, but I do love how impressed he is with everybody's artistic... Marvelous! It's the same guy, the janitor who's also painting things. I like that he's so supportive. He's the opposite of her childhood teacher. And the Lombardo

method is essentially breaking things down into geometric shapes, but that is really how basic drawing works. I don't know if this is a joke or what, but it helps Marge visualize things by breaking things down into shapes. That's just how construction works when you're drawing something. I think they attributed Art 101 to this main character. And he eventually

nominates Marge to represent his class in a Springfield art competition. They've asked me to submit the best painting for my class to the Springfield art exhibition next week. I've decided to choose your bald Adonis. Really? You're so supportive.

I wish every teacher was like you. Marge, please. I don't take praise very well. I think of that every once in a while. I don't take praise very well. I made a note about the design of Professor Lombardo. He is a young beat poet version of Mr. Burns.

I can see that. Also, when they show the competition, I want a painting of that, of the unicorn saying why. I love that so much. Crying over the pollution. What was the first painting? There's that, there's Marge's, and there's something else.

I feel like it was a poker dog. Yeah, it was a poker dog. Yeah, that's right. They're playing poker. Though it was a tough thing. This was kind of the first time they had to do this too of expressing paintings in like drawings with inner words. Though also, the way Lombardo within the universe of the Simpsons

the bunny Lombardo drew was the most lifelike picture ever. Yeah, really. He did an amazing job. I feel like the paintings are less lifelike than the actual I don't know, like what a photo would be in the Simpsons world. I wasn't paying enough attention. I thought it was like one of the Life in Hell bunnies.

A little binky-ish. It looked a lot like a Life in Hell rabbit. Yeah, but if you saw it next to, you know, the rabbit from, say, the Nature episode, it looked just like it. It would look just like it. And this all leads, Marge, to drawing Burns. So Burns is paying for a new wing in a museum, and they're going to give him a painting. And he's been yelling at guys all this time about their paintings.

Apparently, the last guy who gives him a painting was supposed to be Matt Groening, and then Matt Groening just put a kibosh on him. He's like, no, I'm not doing that. I'm saving myself to be a boss of a video game. He's got to save that for 20 years later to be the boss of a video game. He's got to save that for 20 years later to be the boss in a video game. Yeah, Burns essentially has just an entire room of disposed paintings where he's like, these will not do. But it's a perfect excuse to just have Burns

invade the Simpsons space again. Yeah, but it's not just that. He basically lives in their house, and that's where most of the jokes come from. No, and it's great. They're visual largely, so not a lot of clips, but this is him commissioning the painting. Damn nation smithers,

this idea of yours to immortalize me in a portrait was as half-baked as your idea about me having children. Smithers, find me an artist. Sir, I'm afraid you've systematically alienated Springfield's entire art community. The only one left is this Mrs. Homer Simpson. Who? She won first prize in the Springfield Art Fair, and as the wife of an employee, she'll be easily intimidated.

Excellent. Once again, the wheel has turned. She won first prize On the Springfield Art Fair And is the wife of an employee She'll be easily intimidated Excellent Once again The wheel has turned And Dame Fortune Has hugged Montgomery Burns To her sweet Perfumed bosom

Somebody up there Likes me Smithers Somebody down here Likes you too sir Shut up You can tell They were just dying To write more Burns dialogue

Yes Well and Smithers Is as gay as he's ever been In this episode Because like When he gets He throws a piece of paper In his face when he says, about that thing about me having children. And Smithers is smiling so hard. Thank God he rejected this.

I think he's still a Burns sexual, though. Yeah, I think he's still a Burns sexual. I was going to say that Burns does have a child. He's got Larry Burns hanging out in Ogdenville or wherever that. It wasn't North Haverbrook. No. That's for fuck's sure. Wherever that apple pick and place was.

And this is dumb. I just... Another quick John Lovitz character. Leading me to believe he was supposed to be the new Phil Hartman, because this feels like from a comedy like 18 years ago. Oh, yeah. You're going to hear Lenny's voice here, but it's Carl. Lenny's voice and Carl.

This is too late for that to happen, by the way. Yes, totally. They should have known. Hey, what gives? These donuts are piling up. Yeah, Homer Simpson went on a diet. Oh, my God. And I just bought a boat.

Was this the first time there was a joke about Homer being able to fund a single food person? Yeah, single food person. He's like, let my kids do college. I just bought a boat. It's such a ridiculous delivery for that, too. But then Homer, if Homer's eating a box of donuts a day at work, he'd weigh more than 260 pounds. That's for sure. I hate donuts because I love donuts.

They're small and disgustingly sweet and great. And just one of them is 600 calories. Yes. I remember I didn't even know to buy a Genesis, I would eat donuts on a dare at school. I bet you can't eat 16 in one sitting. And I would, and I'm just amazed. Like how fat I'm getting from four beers a night.

Unbelievable. Burns's talking about, he's asking Marge, he's finally commissioning Marge to make the painting and discusses the other famous people she's painted before. Mr. Burns would like to commission you to do a portrait of him. Have you ever painted the rich and powerful? I don't know. Just Ringo Starr.

Ringo? He was the drummer for a rock and roll combo called The Beatles, sir. Beatles, eh? Oh, yes. I seem to remember their off-key caterwauling on the old Sullivan Show. What was Ed thinking? The old Sullivan show is a weird thing for me. Well, honestly, I think it's impressive that Burns even remembers Ed Sullivan's show,

like a televised event. According to his references, it's fairly recent. I know. Like, it would be a thing he just saw, like, in his mind. He would have been, like, 70, though, at that time. Yeah. He's 100. He said he was 82. I'm just still annoyed. They're like, though, at that time. Yeah, he's 100. He said he was 82.

I'm just still annoyed. They're like, no, he's 104. Like, no, he said he was 87. That's what he said. Only 87. So the real challenge is for Marge to find Mr. Burns' inner beauty, which he has none. And that is what sets up the next log of this journey. Yeah, this line I love.

Honey, I'm home. Oh, there's an original sentiment. Take it outside, Simpson. I'm male modeling. I'm painting his portrait, Homer. Oh, isn't that wonderful? My work and my home life come together in such a nice way.

Mark, may I see you in the other room? Honey, he's nuts. He thinks he's handsome. Please, you've got to make him look handsome. Please, please, please, please, please, please, please No, don't worry All I need to do is find Mr. Burns' inner beauty We've heard that before

That specific groan I feel weird Already reusing that groan He's doing that when he Oh, it's when SLH loses And he's banging his head I can't hear that without hearing I really need to place it I'm glad you guys said that Just because Bob said it earlier It's S-L-H loses, and he's banging his head. I can't hear that without hearing dunk, dunk.

Yeah, exactly. I really need to place it. I'm glad you guys said that. Just because Bob said it earlier. So Ziggy goes to the repair shop, and there's a sign on the doorbell reading, out of order. Ziggy, will you ever win? This is great next to the Homer-loving Marmaduke joke.

They just had their bullseye right on the comic pages. I found keep on trucking stuff. I said in the previous episode, I found Ziggy stuff in my parents' old footlocker. Oh, wow. An earnest appreciation of Ziggy is something I've never heard in my lifetime. I believe he got too preachy in a few years, right? Well, this Christmas special is... Yeah, it is great.

Animation's too good for Ziggy, is it? Well, you say. Also, this is the first time anybody... There's been any introspection into Smithers' life. Like, somebody finally said to him, why do you do this? Like, what are you? That is true. Smithers, I want my tea!

Doesn't it bother you that he orders you around like that? Actually, I value every second we're together. From the moment I squeeze his orange juice in the morning till i tuck him in at night he's not just my boss he's my best friend too too hot you're right sir it's scalding me as we speak i'm surprised he didn't throw in for their space you know yeah and then the then him hanging out with burns naked like or the burns is nude yeah why do you have to take off his underpants for the thing? I guess he'll just take off his underpants.

If you'll excuse me, I'm changing for a board meeting. I'm so sorry, Mr. Burns. Hey, Mom, do you have those spots all over his body? I heard that. Oops. Would you feel more comfortable if I left, too, sir? Of course not, Smithers. You're like a doctor.

Wouldn't the board meeting be at the power plant or somewhere that he knows he could take a shower? Yeah, maybe not in the Simpsons bathtub. Have you ever showered in someone's bathroom without asking? Yeah, especially beware for Burns, too. Like, he's used to such opulence to be in their bathtub. I feel like he's just testing his limits of, like, how he can push his family around, really. Well, shit, this all leads us to, oh, man us to oh man finally we go back to merry old england which is like the only time they call it out with titles it's ridiculous it seems very wes anderson it is too like the he is butler oh

right he's got a butler in the scene just said it over there sir if you're forgiven over his impertinence your devotion to your fans is nothing short of remarkable. Well, Weatherby, they took the time to write me, and I don't care if it takes me another 20 years. I'm going to answer every one of them. Hello, what's this? From Springfield, USA.

Gear. That is my, uh, not even quote of the episode, word of the episode. Gear. That's another one my parents had to explain that it was just old times. That's the joke. So I looked this up. Oh, yeah?

It's listed fifth. Fifth on UrbanDictionary.com as the entry for gear. So the first four entries are gear means drug paraphernalia. But number five is, this is a word from the British invasion in pop music circa 1962. Along with groovy and fab, it meant cool and in style and was used by the mods in London. Am I the only 90s kid who thought of keen gear? I was going to say keen gear that Gosling said. Come on, no.

Keen gear. Absolutely not. And I did read that Ringo Starr officially announced in 2008 he would stop responding to fans. Yeah, exactly. And this scene is quoted. I'll never stop. Yeah, the gear thing. They're having him talk like he hasn't aged a day since 1963.

It's one of those fun, like, I think the Simpsons either, when you show up as a celebrity, you're either like a god or like a piece of garbage. Like, you're playing up one of the two qualities. But in this case, Ringo is this heavenly saint who is going to talk to all of his fans for the rest of his life. He will never give up corresponding with them. Well, I guess the joke is it's such a ridiculous extreme. No, the greatest entertainer on earth, the most caring one in the world, would not do that. They would not go that far. Also, that's the first time where

you would have seen the name of the state Springfield is. So they're like, Springfield, USA. I thought they lived in North Tacoma. He also didn't like the... Apparently, when they recorded, he felt he was told it'd be like a couple lines and that it was like 10 lines. He was like, what the hell?

I'm not connected, you know. He's got a solo career. Well, what are you talking about? He was in Caveman. He's such an actor. He was like, what the hell? I'm not connected. I've got a solo career. What are you talking about? He was in Caveman. He was Mr. Conductor for I don't know how many years. Until George Carlin came along. Oh, Alec Baldwin, god damn. In the movie.

You want to hear my line of the show? Sure. This is such a rude insult. Marge is trying to find Burns' inner beauty so she can make the perfect painting of him. He doesn't like any of them either. This is the straw that insult. Like Marge is trying to find Burns inner beauty so she can make the perfect painting of him. He doesn't like any of them either. This is the straw that breaks the camel's back on bothering to find his inner beauty. My line of the show.

I'll just go and do it again. That's the joke. Arch, I'm 239 and I'm feeling fine. Look, I'm using the original notches that came with my belt. That's wonderful, Homer. I'm so proud of you. Let me get this straight. You're pleased with your current appearance?

Oh, why, my good man, you're the fattest thing I've ever seen, and I've been on safari. If you need me, I'll be in the refrigerator. Oh, Jesus. So Homer's back to 239. I didn't realize that. He'd be that forever. He's 239 when he becomes king-size Homer in about five seasons.

None of you are alive. You can't even make that joke because you've never been on Safari. It wouldn't be believable. It wouldn't be believable. I couldn't laugh at it. It was too mean. Well, he could have been on a discount line for Safari. I was in Homer's eyes.

The look on Homer's face was like, you're the fattest thing I've ever seen was in Homer's eyes. Just like the look on Homer's face. Like, you're the fattest thing I've ever seen. Just Homer's reaction. It's not just an insult. It's his boss who's telling him that. It hurt. It hurts. I've been on both ends of the making holes in your belt spectrum.

Like, I've had hand-me-downs from my brother where it's like, this is too big. I've got to put holes in there. And I've also been like, I'm getting a bit too heavy for this belt, and, boom, I've got to make a new one. My belt currently is suffering the way to my gut and looks like the waistband in an 18-year-old pair of underwear. My line of the show is when she gets the letter back from Ringo and his aunt's like, we do have a bag of...

Yeah, well, just as long as you paint a nice picture of him by noon tomorrow. I don't think I can. What? Marge, you have to. I can't make that man beautiful. I'm just not good enough. I guess I'm no artist. Hello? What's this? It's for you, Marge.

From merry old England. From the desk of Ringo Starr. Dear Marge, thanks for the fab painting of yours truly. I hung it on me wall. You're quite an artist. In answer to your question, yes, we do have hamburgers and fries in England, but we call French fries chips.

Love, Ringo. P.S. Forgive the lateness of my reply. Makes me think of what Marge's letter was. Like, dear Ringo, I love your music. Do you have hamburgers and fries in England? Love, Marge. It's part of the reason on Comedy Bang Bang,

I like Mike Hanford's impression of John Lennon so much because he's one of the most important people in pop culture history only talking about dumb horseshit all the time, exploring like, yes, we called them gyps. I think this was the first time I'd ever heard of an English variation on a thing in America. I'm like, no, everything's French fries,

right? It's just French fries. I definitely wouldn't have gotten that. No, I, well, my parents had explained that same with S.O.B. I did not know what the... Oh, right, yeah, she says that. He's like, it's a sob. It's a car you drove in the 80s. Oh, and then they play Don't Come Easy, which is Ringo's first solo

thing, which the writer of the episode almost regretted because it ended up being a lot more pricey than they thought it was. Wait, is that a Beatles song? Well, it's not a beat. No, no. It's a Ringo. Right. But still, it's his biggest hit or one of his biggest hits.

I've never heard the song outside of the context of this episode. Is this a popular song? Do people know this song? It was a pop song, yeah. Okay. Well, in 71, any Beatles solo thing was going to sell through the roof. I remember, Bob. All TV sucked and there was no internet.

Yeah, so Ringo music was great. Actually, one of my favorite radio talking heads, Tom Sharpling, he joked about how stupid it was that last year Ringo got to go into the Hall of Fame as a solo artist because he's like, okay, what good songs did he have? This one and then what? A bunch of covers? Like he's garbage.

As solo, Ringo is garbage and they're just doing it so every Beatle will. songs did he have this one and then what a bunch of covers like he's garbage like it is so as solo ringo is garbage and they're just doing it so every beetle will he was the only beetle not in there as a solo artist in the rock and roll hall of fame in the rock and roll hall of fame do they get like a trophy for that or no but it's it's it was just an honor that what if what if all the others all the other beetles what if he did get a plaque of some kind what do you think you do with it yes oh it's in my head forever one of his only other songs i know of is like you're 16 which is a cover too he didn't even write it but it's one of those things it's like oh this seemed sweet in the 70s and now it's creepy like all of this 40 year old man singing about you're 16 you're beautiful all the dumb baby songs for the Beatles. Yeah.

I do like Octopus's Garden, but it is like a clap your hands and like... It should come with a fully illustrated book. What can you do with that book, Chris? I hung it on me wall.

But you shouldn't. It's a book. Come on. Sorry, I had a bookshelf up. So let me go to the unveiling. Did you notice that Mo was at the unveiling? What's he doing?

I think Barney was too, but only at the very beginning. I think they stuck him for free drinks. Actually, my line of the show is coming up. I don't know if we can jump to that. Is that where Marge explains? Because originally the piece, she ends up painting Mr. Burns nude and everybody responds with

gasped. It's what Miss Hoover says. And this is like my motto for life. I don't know if you have this clip or not, Chris. It's what Miss Hoover says. And this is like my motto for life. I don't know if you have this clip or not, Chris. It's the response to the Burns painting. So the painting is unveiled and it's Burns naked. And Marge showing Burns that he's most vulnerable. At the time

when I saw this when it premiered, the amount of, the lengths they went to to hide his dick with everybody's hands and hair. Exactly. It's an Austin Powers joke. I mean, it was six years before Austin Powers. Well, I guess I wanted to show that beneath Mr. Burns'

fearsome head with its cruel lips, spiteful tongue, and evil brain, there was a frail, withered body. Perhaps not long for this world. As vulnerable and beautiful as any of God's creatures. Yes!

Cut it off. I know what you're talking about. My favorite line is, they're looking at the painting. Is it Miss Hoover? It is Miss Hoover and Hibbert. They call it the first appearance of Miss Hoover. That can't be true. It absolutely isn't.

It isn't? Okay, yeah. I was just on the wiki. You never really saw Lisa in class. She may have never talked before this one. Her line is, he's bad, but he'll die. So I like it.

Whenever I see some old billionaire tyrant like, oh, you'll never believe what Rupert Murdoch is doing now, it's like, well, he's going to die. We'll be okay. You can't run away from death, no matter how powerful you are. A comic writer I really like, Grant Morrison, he said why he thinks 1984 would never really happen, or constant fascism would never happen, because nobody lives forever. And also, somebody has to take a shit at some point, and it's just, there can't always be an I watching.

Right, right. If they're a man, they have to have an affair with a young mistress, and that leaves you very vulnerable to stabbings and poisonings and all that stuff. I think my line of the show is the exit line from the episode. Oh, that's great. That is the greatest. I got that line, but also with the sting, because it makes it weirdly cheesy and comedic.

It corns it up a little bit, but I like it. You know, I'm no art critic, but I know what I hate. And I don't hate this. Your painting is bold, but beautiful. And incidentally, thanks for not making fun of my genitalia. I thought I did. I hung it on me wall. But there was a fight to get the word genitalia on the air, I believe.

That was in the commentary, too, that they had to... All the producers on the show signed a thing saying, you should be allowed to say genitalia on the episode. And Fox censors were like, no, you can't.

Well, this is a... Going back on the Simpsons, they're not allowed to take notes. They can't take... This was a thing on the Homer's Phobia episode, too. They can't take content notes on, like, you should write this, you should write this, this is funnier. But a censorobia episode too they can't take content notes on like you should write

this you should write this this is funnier but a censor can't tell them you can't do that because of censorship and they're originally on homers phobia the censor gave them notes of like all these references to gay stuff you can't do that that's not for the show yeah which they eventually got overturned and same deal with this they're genitalia, and they all signed a thing saying, you should say, it's not a dirty word necessarily. I didn't, again, parents explain that word to me. I couldn't believe the movie showed

Bart's dick. The only time I can remember, they're like, Dad, hide your shame. It's not only not a dirty word, it's like the literal definition of what's being shown, and it's something that Burns would say because he's from the 1800s. So I feel like it's like the most scientific way to say private parts or his dick or whatever you want to call it. I think it wasn't until the Bobbitt case that you could say penis freely on TV.

Because they just had to, once the Bobbitt thing happened and his penis would cut off. They had to say penis all the time on the news. We can't tiptoe around it anymore. The only other time I've ever recalled hearing genitalia is from the Jerky Boys, where I've got warts all over my ass and genitalia. Oh. Do you remember

what Lorena Bobbitt did with her husband's dick? I hung it on me wall. I love that. That was great. So how small is Burns' penis? Is it like half an inch? Well, he was just out of the shower. Come on, everybody. I was in a pool.

I don't know what a 104-year-old man's penis looks like, but it can't be very picturesque. Like Harris, but with Burns' hair. Actually, as I'd heard scientifically, your penis keeps growing when you're old wow it's just like your nose your ears and your penis

if you want to listen closely you can hear it it's happening right now as we speak ladies the magic of life excuse me lady so yes that was

talking Simpsons everybody I have been your host Bob Mack you can find me on Twitter as Bob Servo you can also read my work at usgamer.net and

somethingawful.com and I also do the classic gaming podcast Retronauts find that at retronauts.com or just search for it in your podcast device everybody else. Laser Time that's the show that sort of born all around pop culture show that born this

stupid act of doing a podcast of every minuscule thing we think it's hilarious sorry it's late now I'm feeling a little cynical. And there's also 302010 where we talk about the pop culture events every 30 years, 10 years ago, and 20 years ago. And there's Cape Crisis, the comic book podcast I talk about every week.

And also, if you want to hear the first season of Talking Simpsons, that's only available through Patreon. Go to patreon.com slash lasertime, and for $5 a month, you will get access to that first season. Awesome. And please leave us a comment

and or a review on the iTunes Music Network that really helps our show reach new people and I'd appreciate it a lot personally. Also if you have a good review we'll hang it on our wall. And I host the Cheap Podcast Pro Wrestling Podcast where 239 pounds is actually life for a wrestler. And that's it for us this week everybody

we'll see you next week with a brand new episode. I hung it on me wall wow infotainment