Talking Simpsons - Talking Simpsons - Catch 'em if You Can

Episode Date: August 13, 2025

"We have to grab this chance for romance now, or we'll never be alone. Not till Lisa's in college and we've lost contact with Bart." - Homer Simpson When Bart and Lisa don't show proper reverence for the 1970 film Love Story, Homer and Marge decide to take a Flanders-funded sex trip to Miami. But when the kids find out they've been deceived, they pursue their parents in a city-hopping adventure that culminates in a perfectly serviceable Catch Me if You Can parody. Support this podcast and get over 200 ad-free bonus episodes by visiting Patreon.com/TalkingSimpsons and becoming a patron! And please follow the official Twitter, @TalkSimpsonsPod, not to mention Bluesky and Instagram!

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I heartily endorse this event or product. Ahoy, ho, everybody, and welcome to Talking Simpsons, a rambling, disjointed, but somehow erotic podcast. I'm one of your host, the Puck Slapping Maple Sucker, Bob Mackie, and this is our chronological exploration of the Simpsons, who is here with me today, as always. I'm only rotting on my right side, Henry Gilbert. And this week's episode is Catch him if you can. At least I was planned. Stop it. No one was planned.

This week's episode originally aired on April 25th, 2004, and as always, Henry will tell us what happened on this mythical day in real world history. Oh my God! Denzel's Man on Fire beats 13 going on 30 at the box office. The Abu Ghrae prison abuse is revealed, and in other torture news, the Jamie Kennedy Experiment has aired its final episode. Man on fire, man on fire!

Yes. The Denzel Washington TV, teams up with Little Dakota fanning to have a typical, you know, revenge movie plot thing. I think also it's very guilty of the, we went to Mexico, everything's orange screen approach. They put on the piss filter. Well, this is the summer of 2025 now. And the only man on fire we care about is the human torch. He was burning up the box office as we speak.

And Henry, you recently ate the Fantastic Four pizza. I need a full review from Little Cesar's. You stooped to eating Little Cesar's pizza for the sake of. IP. I need you to make content out of this. Well, yes, we decided, you know what, we're like, hey, look at that. There's a Little Caesar's Pizza ad in this thing, this new Fantastic Four video. You know what? I think it's only $10. Why don't we get it? That means it's great.

Well, you know what, Little Caesars, I hadn't eaten Little Caesars in a while, and they are dependable trash, I'll say. I count on their normal level of quality. Honestly, it was saltier and crunchier than a Papa John's pizza, which I had recently. that made it better. Although I know the pizza is cut up into different quadrants for each member of the Fantastic Four, but it does strike me as strange that you have one very Jewish member of the team, Ben Grimm, and there are two kinds of pork on the pizza. Well, you know, Ben Grim, I don't think he always keeps kosher in the comics,

but you make a good point there that, like, they don't specifically say this quadrant means another, but yes, it's eight slices, two slices for a different flavor, and one is plain cheese, One has sausage and bacon, which I think is the thing. One has just pepperoni, and one has pepperoni and jalapenos. Though if you saw in my photo, the jalapenos kind of drifted around the entire pepperoni have. There's a very thin profit margin on these $10 pizzas. They don't have much time to spend on them, I don't think. Though I assume, obviously, the jalapeno must represent human torch because he's spicy.

And at first I thought the cheese was the invisible woman because it's like, well, there's no top. toppings. It's invisible, but I was like, no, cheese is stretchy. I guess it's like stretchy, like Mr. Fantastic. But it was a totally fine $10 pizza, which is a cheap pizza right now that you can split with your husband. I remember when Little Caesar's pizzas were $5.20. Like, we're really getting to pizza here, because this episode sucks, by the way. Post-economic depression, the Little Caesar's pizzas were $5. They're saying, you just want a calorie slab to feed your starving family. You're jobless. Get in here. And they were always pushed as the hot and ready, meaning like, you just walk in and get it. Like, get out of here. We're not even taking your order. You point, you grunt, you get out. Well, we're all enjoying the first steps, aren't we?

It's August. I've been there three times. I've taken several steps. I'm hoping it's good. I would like it to be good. Now, Bob, the movie, the Tony Scott film, Man on Fire, the movie it beat, was 13 going on 30, which I think you watched recently, right?

Yes, it's a very odd movie. and I was ready for essentially what I assumed would be girl big, but it's not. And it causes you to ask a lot of questions because it essentially like shunts a girl's soul into the future where she is 30. So it starts in the 80s and then she ends up in like 2004 or whatever. And I wrote in my letterbox review, I want to see the scene where they have to explain 9-11 to her. Because it's also like an existential horror movie because she has missed 20 years of her life, essentially. man see that scared me so much as a kid when that was the concept of fly to the navigator of like the kid wakes up and like his little brother's now his older brother and his family

he's been missing for years as far as they're concerned but i mean 13 going on 30 do jennifer garner and mark ruffalo at least have like nice chemistry yes they do in fact i'm only just now learning who mark ruffalo is and i'm enjoying all of his performances he's great in poor things he plays who i call evil paul f tompkins in that movie definitely watch He's like, Paul L. Tompkins playing Donald Trump in Mickey 17. Yes, movie I like it, I feel is underrated. But, yes, 13-030 is basically girl big, but with time travel. And it's very odd.

And yes, the Jamie Kennedy experiment, it lasted two years. It was a candid camera for the post-9-11 years, starring the most annoying person who ever got to be famous. Yes, I recommend everyone look up podcast, The Rides, episode about whatever New Year's Eve special he hosted, which is a nightmare disaster. And I'm sad to say that this Jamie Kennedy experiment show its cultural legacy lasted long enough to taint arrested development because there is a G plot, an H plot, whatever, like, lower level plot you want to call it, where a character is X'd. That's what you would call getting punked in the Jamie Kennedy world. You got X'd. Right. You know what?

I was getting that confused with the one where Zach Braff plays a Girls Gone Wild type guy and exposes, he gets exposed that he's a never nude, I think. Like girls with low self-esteem, was that the name of? of it. I think that's it. Something like that. But it was Jamie Kennedy playing Jamie and it made me sad because I love the Scream franchise and the Jamie Kennedy character in the first two movies

like he was the guy I projected myself onto in the movies. Like, well, if I was anybody in this scream group, I am the virgin video store jerk. Like that's who I am, the Jamie Kennedy role. And then he had to become an annoying asshole. Well, I looked

this up on Google. I just typed Jamie Kennedy, Arrested Development. The first result is someone asking, can somebody explain the green X joke on this episode of Rested Velvet? I have no idea what this means. Though, you know, another cultural legacy of it that is, I had forgotten that it got its own movie in the Malibu's most wanted film is technically a spinoff of the Jamie Kennedy character,

B-Rad, that he would play in sketches in the Jamie Kennedy experiment. Great. I bet that was a real big payoff. off to all of those sketches. It was like his Ali G, right? Yes, yeah. It was what if a rich Jewish kid was so into hip hop that he acts like a

hip hop person, but then he gets taken into the hood and sees what it's really about. That's the plot of the movie. And you know it's 2025, everything old is new again. We don't know what's going to happen. This episode goes live in like two months, by the way. We're back in June. We don't know what's going on,

but it feels like it's starting to feel like the early aughts again. And Of course, Obama did close Abu Ghraib like he promised, so that's no longer an issue. Oh, wait, hold the fort. I'm getting just in, oh, it's still open. Okay. Yeah, no, it really saw. That also was a plot point on Arrested Development, actually.

Amy Poehler played a parody version of the female prison guard, who was part of this horrible, horrible scandal. Again, I think the last time it came up in the media was when Ellen DeGeneres tried to talk about how awesome George Bush is and how he have to be all friends and stuff. and people then like superimposed images from this horrible scandal on top of her just to be like, why do we have to forget, again, no one remembers anything, everything's bad when you remember it, but it sucks to remember like, no, this was, this was actually like horrible instead of, and that was seen as like, well, we can't let this happen again. Then 60 minutes reported on it is like, this is pretty bad. This happens every single day all of the time now.

Yeah, actually, I was sorry, earlier on I was confusing Ibu Grabe with Guantanamo Bay, which was the Obama promise that never followed through. And I think I was confusing because there were other torture pictures that he suppressed. Yes. We don't need to see any more of this, folks. I mean, you can just assume torture happens all of the time. Like, we're an evil empire. We know it.

Also, this same week, Pat Tillman was killed by friendly fire in Afghanistan as well. That also happened this week. Yeah, speaking of Versed Development, I believe Amy Poehler played the Lindy England character. Lindy England was the person, the short white woman pointing at the people being tortured in the photos yes yeah what a wonderful you know that's another version of that great meme cartoon i love every time i see it of like oh thank goodness we're being bombed by a woman this time like she's really breaking the glass ceiling like it's the same hey the ladies can do it too and by it i mean war crimes and hey listeners you might think we're being huge

bummers right now but i'd rather spend a weekend in abograib than watch catch me if you can or sorry catch em if you can the simpson's episode because stinkeruny well Sinkerooney. Yeah, well, so that's what happened in the week. This aired, it was a dark, dark time for all of us as we watched this episode. Yes, and this week's guest is no one because we don't want to subject anyone to this rotten episode, which I feel like is not as hated as the codependence day, but I feel like in many ways it's more vicious and hateful than an episode in which Homer frames his wife for a DUI. It at least seems to admit they come from a similar place of what if Margin Homer had fun to?

together. But in this case, it's more turns it into like a sex romp that they are, it's like it's a minor like sex comedy instead of they like getting drunk together. It's a lesser version of natural born kissers, but it's like I said earlier, it's hateful. And I feel like every member of the family hates each other more than I've ever seen before. And it's not a fun watch to the point where you think Homer and Marge are getting along. But then Marge asked Homer, if I died, would you be sad? He says, well, I wouldn't be happy about it. or something like that. He's not committal to the idea of being sat over March dying.

I mean, to see, when we get to it, too, like, Marge screams at the children, like, in a way that rarely do they happen with Marge. And you're right, it's also just natural-born kisses again, even with, like, the casual public sex being the thing that saves or is their happy ending. Yes, and so this is not really a parody of Catch Me If You Can, the 2002 Spielberg movie. There's a very long drive to what I feel is a lackluster and non-confident parody of the title sequence.

But outside of that, I feel like they spend just as much time on Grandpa's plot and parodying Miami Vice for some reason. Yes, and a 1970 film most people don't remember. They also spend, that gets more specifics than Catch Me if you can other than the opening title parody of Catch Me if you can. Yeah, you're right, Henry. This has more to do with Love Story than the Spielberg film. I will admit, as Al Jean says on the commentary,

it's cute that their parody is turning me into M. It's one of the funnier jokes in this episode. Well, speaking of weird, this is the era of Simpsons commentaries where they are just interviews. They bring people in often. Sometimes it's the person from the show. Sometimes it's Alan Seppenwall, a writer, a critic.

This time, it is Jeff Nathanson, who is the screenwriter of Catch Me If You Can. And because Catch Me If You Can never had a DVD commentary, this is essentially the commentary for the film. Even though they're talking about an episode, they don't really talk that much about what we're talking about today. So there is an Al Jean and Mike Reese connection because Jeff Nathanson tried to give TV writing a go,

and Al Jean and Mike Reese worked with him for one day on a pilot. They were punching up a pilot called The 900 Lives of Jackie Fry. That pilot might have eventually been made into a TV movie, but the only description is what I could find from IMDB, and that description is as follows, quote, A compassionate warden, Jackie Fry gets a job in a state prison in Kansas. He vows to clean the place up,

and he soon makes friends with an inmate and prison guard who helps him do the job. So that is where Jeff Nathanson began, and then he went on to write a speed two cruise control, and then following that, he wrote a lot of very big movies, often very big and bad movies,

like, let's say, Indiana Jones in the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, or the terminal, but he has worked with some of the biggest directors of all time writing blockbusters. Yeah, it was interesting to hear. He mentions Twister, some point in here well because there's a twister on screen it sounds like that was like his

entrance into dream works he worked on twister and that then got him in the meetings with spielberg and yeah philberg definitely the best thing he made was spilberg is catch me if you can the terminal of stinks and kingdom of the crystal skull only is getting slightly better appraised to now because the more reason indiana jones movie is worse yes and i mean weirdly enough pertaining to what we cover, Jeff Nathanson is very relevant because he wrote the number one animated movie of all time, The Lion King, 2019. Boo. And also, Mufasa, not so high on that list, but still, that's saying something, even though

he's working from an original movie that's much better. Yeah, it's pretty funny that he gets to be the writer on this movie that's like shot-for-shot remakes most of the Lion King, and the only changes you notice are when they are worse than the original. It's like, oh, the writer must have changed this, or John Fabro, must have changed this to this worse idea. Ah, man, it's funny, though, that he's like this big shot, like, in-demand Hollywood writer, and he's just kind of slumming it with The Simpsons for an afternoon for a commentary.

I'm sure he was just in L.A. doing stuff, shooting the shit. This is 2011. This is, like, I think September of 2011, based on the commentary. So I have to assume he is taking meetings for tower heist, or perhaps New York, I love you, or maybe even Pirates of the Caribbean. Dead Men Tell No Tales. Oh, yeah, wait. He also wrote Rush Hour 2 and 3, so he worked a lot with Brett Rettner. Hey, maybe they were in separate rooms, let's hope.

And weirdly enough, I kind of enjoyed the commentary as an oddball commentary. It really sets the commentary in time because there is about five to eight minutes of talk about the one-season TV show Pan Am, which just started airing all of its 14 episodes that fall. And here's a thing. I'm questioning, why did this series not go on for more than one season? It had Christina Ritchie and Margot Robbie as sexy stewardesses. What was everyone thinking? Well, they didn't know what they had with Margo Robbie. Though Wolf of Wall Street had just come out, right?

And she's like supposed to be the most beautiful woman in the world in that movie. Actually, I think that was 2012. I think this was Margot Robbie begins. And they're like, some Australian blonde lady, get her out of here. Well, that Pan Am was, as they mentioned on the comment, like it is everybody wants to be madmen for a time like madman was a huge hit and very critically claimed so everybody's like well if it's just in the 60s like that's the same general vibe people like that which is and they are right to catch me if you can was ahead of that wave like it is

set in madman times like it's basically in the same timeline as madmen yeah very strange it didn't last that long but you're right margarabi not a known quantity the wolf of wall street actually 2013 so see we didn't know yet how hot she was but soon after that she'll be Harley Quinn and everybody loves her then but yeah it's funny hearing them mainly just ask him questions I learned interesting things about like how Christopher Walken tried to quit the film because he didn't like a rewrite I was like well that's interesting this has nothing to do with this episode but yeah and I guess interestingly enough this is written by Ian Maxstone Graham although he says later this is not his pitch he forgets who actually pitched the idea but he is a man without

children. So this whole resentment of your children and your family it's not coming from a personal place, but I feel like a lot of other writers are bringing this in in this era. We're seeing a lot of, like, hateful marriages and soon, I think Manjula has already been defined as like the hateful wife

who always wants to hurt you and destroy you emotionally. So I think things are a little rocky at home for some of these writers. I don't want to assume too much here. Yeah, and Manjula, what a horrible bitch who mad at her husband for what? Cheating on her a bunch? Cheating multiple times despite their large, large family.

Yeah, what a selfish woman. No, yeah. It's a weird time of if everybody's marriages were happy in the writer's room, then I would be shocked to hear that because there's just so much like, the other ones are like, well, if only we could drink together, then we could have a good time and have sex. Now this one is, if our children didn't exist, then we would have normal sex and be happy. It's like, I don't think so either. I think you guys have a deeper problem, perhaps, than just your children are horrible. Yeah, and season six is Grandpa versus Sexual Inadequacy. It's an all-time great episode, and it does handle the idea of, like, your middle age, how do you have sex, a lot better than this, where they have to say, well, I guess you need to have sex in a bounce house after almost dying to really get your groove back.

And even in Natural Born Kissers, like, it has such a great, Mike Scully seasons are mean too, but I think he might just have a happier marriage. at the time but it comes from just it starts with well the bad place they're in is they're having sex just out of like function of like well this is our anniversary I guess we should have sex and they just very boringly have a false start at sex they aren't screaming at each other

like I fucking hate these kids shut the hell up Lisa but to get that from Ian Maxstone Graham to know he didn't pitch it that is interesting but like his episodes like are just mean he's a mean writer is a mean and sometimes that's good sometimes it's I did come to an idea I shocked I didn't think of before,

which was when we covered the Artie Ziff episode of this season and he's spritzing people with water bottles for smoking. I now wonder if it was an inside joke about how the known story from Saturday Night Live that when Ian McDonougham was a writer on Saturday Night Live, and so was Norm McDonald and a performer. Norm McDonald was smoking a cigarette in the writer's room. He had Ian McSto Graham poured water on. his head to get him to stop smoking. And then

Norm MacDonald punched him in the face and he fell to the ground. Yes. You know what? It could be. With Ian in the room, I can see that being and that story probably wasn't as well known at that point. You know, they don't say this on the commentary. Who knows? I wonder too, if, you know, we asked Lou Morton

about his time working at SNL for the 8 Crazy Nights podcast. I bet he was in that same room to see that punch. Nor, I don't think he'd want to tell us that story. But I think now with one member of the party dead. I think you can look back and laugh. So maybe Artie Ziff being horribly beaten in prison for hating smoking was a reference to

Ian Maxstone Graham being punched. But he brings a lot of like rich liberal jerkiness to this episode that I don't particularly enjoy either. The episode begins though in the classic school bus opening. I do think Al Jean has remembered that like, oh, the kids on the school bus are kid's stuff can be a fun entry into an episode. Yeah, some classic Bart pranks. He is a bullying mentor here, or at least like a prank mentor. The interesting change of pace where like sometimes the bullies only hate Bart, sometimes Bart helps bullies, or is a like side bully himself.

Only Millhouse gets beaten up here. Bart also, when he describes how to load up the ordinance, again, I'm like, boy, we're deep in the Iraq war here. Like everything's militarized. Yeah, you know what? I didn't read that as war. lingo, but it definitely is. Then I think they've gotten tired of Mo being suicidal because when Bart says they could

shoot it at Otto, but then he'd probably drive it off a cliff. Otto goes, off a cliff, that would solve everything. So he's suicidal now. Yeah, Otto's in a dark place here. We heard in a recent episode how he has to shoot up between his toes because his mom checks him. That's right. Well, and he is getting high a lot at the big fat geek wedding as well. He also, in the deleted scene on that, he aggressively hits on Miss Krabop.

which also is gross to me. I'm going to be keeping an eye on how suicidal will auto be going forward. This is a new low for him. Well, Ralph is committing self-harm here out of stupidity. Ralph is picking his nose so much that he just had like my nose makes its own play-dough. Is that the line? Something like that, yeah. And then he pokes himself in the eye and he stops trusting his finger.

And then we pan away from him as he's about to cut his finger off with scissors. Oh, and he says, ouch, doesn't he? So meaning he did hurt himself. yes fortunately those scissors couldn't cut butter as miss foover once said the children are right to laugh at him Lisa is reading the book how to talk to a drunk father which I mean Homer is drinking in this episode but he's not as drunk as he has been in previous episodes yeah this era has a much darker tone for whatever reason it's like I don't know why maybe it is the warfare the horrible things happening in our government at the time but everything is just meaner and nastier and they're

also treating Homer's alcoholism like it's a real problem yeah it's a real thing happening to actual people instead of just like, oh, he drinks a lot and it's funny, L.O.L.L. This episode is directed by Matt Nastic, and I'll, him and his team credit that slow-mo hit of the water balloon on Lisa. For this era of season 15, that's very good animation on the season 15 average. Yeah, it's a lot of drawings. You're asking people to do things in slow motion for quite a number of seconds, so credit to them. They worked hard on that. Auto is shocked about horseplay on a school bus, has the world gone mad, and he then dumps them out. as Bart and Lisa roll out of the front door

without even slowing down in the bus and into the house merely while killing Maggie I suppose She lands safely in her litter box But this is one of maybe three instances Where I'm thinking there should be a joke here Because she just lands in the litter box And that's all there is to it

I guess it's like ew gross But you know things are off And I had to rewind to make sure Marge is actually saying this The kids collide with her She drops Maggie, Maggie lands in litter box And Marge says Shame on you two creeps You're right.

She uses toward creeps. That is the first of, like, so many things. And he was like, wait, no, no, no. You guys forgot to write a joke thing. There should be another line. There should be another turn on that. Yeah. And like immediately after that, you know, Bart blames Lisa.

Lisa says at least that I was planned. And Marge says, nobody was planned. So off the bat, Marge has had it. Yeah. Marge at least, like Homer immediately loses his temper. Marge, you think would just mumble and groan and be put upon as is her way. But she is just immediately hateful and vindictive. It's for a minute one.

I mean, I guess what happens to Maggie pushes her over the edge, let's say, but yeah, she calls him little creeps and is just screaming on him. It is so, I don't know, Marge, you want warm niceness from Marge. In our first clip here, you will hear Marge, like, at least try. It's the regular Marge, like she's trying to be positive and everybody's tearing her down kind of thing, so at least that's more normal instead of just outright meanness. But we're off to a bad start here. As Marge tells us about the fun, they've got planned.

Now we have to pack for great Uncle Tyrone's birthday tomorrow. In Dayton. Dayton, Ohio. It's got Wright-Patterson Air Force Base and a zipper museum. They have a zipper from every James Bond. Why are we even going? Last year, Uncle Tyrone was bitter and depressed. Happy birthday to you.

Why won't I die? We're staying at the Dayton Arms Hotel. It got three diamonds from Five Diamond magazine. Please don't make us go. If you make me get on that plane, I'll give myself diarrhea. I know how. Okay, don't go. Just stay here and rot with Grandpa.

I'm only riding on the right side. Right side, you. All right, kids, you don't have to go. But I insist we do something tonight as a family. We'll play board games. Put photos in an hour. album measure how much you've grown and what is your deal anyway well i let's just rent a movie so we have i think three failed attempts at jokes or the attempt was not even made so we have maggie landing

in the litterbox there should be another joke on top of that something to play off of that and then this uncle tyrone well i like the date and humor we'll talk more about dating in a second here all he says is like why won't i die and that's it like that's not fun I've seen this kind of joke many, many times before. There should be something more to that. A miserable old man who wishes for death, like, that's totally acceptable as a good enough joke in, like, season two or three of Simpsons where you'd never been there.

But, like, so many shows have gone far beyond that of just, like, the Death Wish Senior. And Uncle Tyrone is such a rando character. I also feel like the Simpsons used to make jokes about making up an uncle you've never heard of before, and then you'd never see them, or it'd just be like, Oh, yeah, poor Ant Hortense, but they forgot why they made fun of characters like Uncle Tyrone and simply had him on screen. Well, despite the appearance of this new character, I assume we never see again. We do see some returning Simpsons from Lisa the Simpson, including the guy who says, well, sir, I step in front of cars and sue the drivers.

And the successful Lady Simpsons, too. They're all existing characters from that one scene, which is a nice touch. I give credit to the character layout and design team who realized, hey, wait a minute, And we already have a dozen approved Simpsons relatives right here that look totally fine. We'll draw them in there instead of making people up. I consider them fun Easter eggs. And I'm on my Youngstown Ohio high horse, which is also a shithole. But I can look down upon Dayton because I did meet somebody from Dayton in college.

And I was like, wow, Dayton. If you grew up in eastern Ohio, western Ohio is like Darby Dragons. I've never been to Cincinnati or Dayton. And I was like, what's Dayton like? And the idea was never go to Dayton. Dayton is scary. Dayton is another ruin town. There is no Zipper Museum, by the way, either.

So don't go looking for that. And there's no famous spaghetti with chili on top. That's Cincinnati. Dayton needs to just make up their own chili spaghetti combo. Do it chili with ravioli instead. They are free idea, Dayton. Well, at Zipper Museum joke, it did remind me of how I do fall into things of like that James Bond exhibit, not too far off from me going to the World Forestry Museum in Portland, Oregon,

and just to see the log ladies log from Twin Peaks recently. I hope you looked at other tree stuff. We went through the whole museum and also walked through other stuff. And honestly, my problem with that museum is it was clearly made by the logging industry because it's not about just how like forests are great. It's about how in a conservationist way do logging in forest. I was like, oh, come on, this is all paid for by the Fruit Punch Advisory Board. If we didn't log all those trees, we just grow out of control.

There's much more stuff about the machinery that cuts down trees in there than there is about what a tree is or how a forest grows. It was kind of a bring down. Meanwhile, the log lady was about 12 square feet of log lady stuff, but boy, wasn't a nice 12 square feet. It's nice that that log is somewhere. Well, Ohio is strange because inexplicably, and I know there's probably some reason that someone's going to comment on. The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame is in Cleveland, all right, but also the Air Force Hall of Fame or the official museum of the Air Force is in Dayton. So they have an Air Force base outside of Dayton and within that base or adjacent to the base is the U.S. Air Force Museum. Wow. I didn't know that. So I could combo them

in the same day then, the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame and the Air Force Museum. If you knew any facts about Dayton, I'd be terrified. Have I, other than flying over it, I don't think I have ever been anywhere in Ohio in my life. Yeah, I was there for too long and I can say you can skip it. People in Ohio, you'll agree with me. I don't think anyone in Ohio is like, hey, wait a minute. I've seen the occasional Ohio defender out there. Also, I did laugh. I will count as a good joke. Three Diamonds from Five Diamond magazine is a good. That made me laugh. Yeah, there are some good jokes snuck in amongst all the hate. And speaking of hate, they've now remembered that they like writing jokes where Homer shakes his fist. It's been a few

episodes, but now he does it twice in this episode. Yeah, I like when he will do it to both Bart and Lisa. They both get alternate fish shakes. Now as an adult, Obviously, this episode is about the child did hating the childless, and we are both childless, happily so. I definitely was thinking when they say like, okay, well, you won't have to go. I was just thinking, boy, how much money do they get back on those plane tickets to not have the kids go? Like, already, you're feeling rich. Yeah, yeah. And you got a free babysitter with grandpa?

That's very lucky. I realize that's why people's grandparents, like, move near them when a baby is born. It is to, you know, be a babysitter, free child care. Or the people move closer to their parents, so you get a lot of child care. Child care is expensive. Our government's not paying for it. They obviously want the white race to propagate, but on your money, that's what our fascist government wants. Use that green money, white people.

I did also laugh at Bart's just matter of fact, like, what is your deal anyway about a mother loving her children and wanting to spend time? Yeah, let's just rent a movie. When Homer and March take a second honeymoon, the kids play catch him if you can. But day! Your vacations run, Diego food, and grandpa's with a gay guy in Miami. Your neck skin, nonsense when you speak. And all new Simpsons, part of the full hour. Then, what's with you're playing matchmaker?

Setting your friends up with the same girl. Yeah. Ah! Oh my God, we're doing each other! And all new Malcolm, it all starts at 7th, 6th Central Fox Sunday. Welcome to the break, everybody. It's Henry Gilbert saying podcasting means never having to say you're sorry. And I'm not sorry at all to you listeners because we are doing great stuff here at patreon.com

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to see all of the ad-free bonus content you're missing out on. It's all in the collection section, easy to find. Head over to patreon.com slash talking Simpsons today. I like the trip to the video store, which is, it's in its dying days to the point where there are still VHSs on the shelves in this scene. Yeah, Al Jean, he loves to have people watch TV and he loves to have people go to video stores and they're at lackluster video. I think this is the first time that they went to the place that used to be Beta Barn. It was VHS Village. Yes, yeah, that's it.

And so now they're at lackluster, which I feel like is by 2004, definitely some other comedy had used that. play on words for a parody of Blockbuster. There's no way they're the first to call it lackluster video. And the slogan is where if it doesn't star Sandra Bullock, your rental is free. And this might be a bit unfair to Sandy B because she had a very big 2000

and I believe 2002, but she was only in the movie crash this year in that one best picture. One of the more shameful best pictures, but I read to this as a joke too about just how much the Blockbuster video depended on new releases. You couldn't find

old movies there. Like, honestly, the fact they find love story to rent is not likely at a blockbuster. My blockbuster video that I worked at in 2004 when this aired did not have love story on the shelf. I feel pretty safe and saying. Like, you didn't go to Blockbuster video to rent anything that was older than 10 years that wasn't like as famous as Star Wars. Well, actually, I really want to know more about the Henry Gilbert blockbuster era because I hear a lot of stories about the movie theater era and the independent VHS place era, but never Blockbuster stories. Was it just a gray smear of your life? I mean, it wasn't a very happy time for sure. Well, so basically, I had just started a Blockbuster when this aired, I think, because I had quit

the movie theater. So I worked from the movie theater. It's very easy to pin those dates. It's like November of 2002, because the big release was the second Harry Potter movie, Chamber of Secrets, and then it was like two weeks after the release of Passion of the Christ when I quit, which would have been in February I had quit the movie theater. And then two months-ish later, I got my job at Blockbuster Video. And this was right before the no-late-feas marketing would begin to kill it. But Netflix was already here. It was a dark time at Blockbuster Video.

Hmm. I just have never rented from a Blockbuster. There was one in my town, but there were just so many local video places that were only a few blocks away, so we never had to stray. We had the understanding, like, oh, Blockbuster's expensive. See, you were lucky in that regard in where you live because Blockbuster in Orange Park, Florida, successfully killed all competition. Like, there's the Blockbuster I worked at in Orange Park, Florida was across the street from another Blockbuster because Blockbuster bought the competition across the street, but I think legally had. They couldn't just buy it to close it, so they had to open a new blockbuster there. So there's two blockbusters across the street from each other up until the day they both closed.

That's like how there were three GameStop-owned video game stores in one mall near me. There was a Babbage's, a GameStop, and then right outside the mall in the parking lot was a phone call-land. So they operated like three stores, and each store had different prices. That's weird. That is weird. Working a Blockbuster, a lot of the time it was just you got 80 copies of a brand new movie, and that's all you had in stock because that's what the business was

is like don't go to the mom and pop because they're not going to have the newest release. We bought too many copies of the newest release and we'll likely have it, but just you wouldn't have too many things in the back shelves and it wasn't a place for people who cared about movies and also like I really hate any nostalgia

for Blockbuster. I hated that Netflix did a sitcom called The Last Blockbuster for like one season that was about oh poor Blockbuster. It's like fuck that place. All it was was monster that got killed by a different monster like it doesn't make it like a good place i think i mean

we're talking about other things because this episode sucks but i think we just missed the communal experience the public experience where even if you're not talking anyone you're going to a place and the ritual of doing that is meaningful and more special than just scrolling on netflix until you just are hit by too many choices and turn off your tv like we have started renting at a local store in vancouver after recommended once again it's called video cats and even though i have access to most movies I see on the shelves. It's fun to go in and think, what am I going to watch and not having like a plan? And then we go home with a bunch of movies that I never thought I would watch. And it's great. And yes, even though we have to like take a bus and then walk a mile, it's like, oh, it's

the experience that I miss. It's just this, you pick up a case, you look at it, you talk to someone, you go home with a little bag of disc. It's great. I went through it recently on the visit to Portland of going to the movie madness, right? That's the name of the old video They're really good. The experience of walking around in it just with my husband and like looking, I see a disc on the shelf and I say, oh, you know, this movie is this. And I explain the plot of the movie or even we walk into the theater and playing on the TV is the Ashley Judd film Double Jeopardy. And I explained the plot to him. And I was like, boy, these are not not really the conversations you have staring at a streaming service.

And a clerk said, sir, please stop explaining movies. It's like, oh, but I used to, well, I also did have the old man speech. of like, you kid here and working here, you don't know how good you have it. Oh, boy, would I love to work to this video store. But, yeah, I was the squeaky voice teen at the computer. I would have been telling people about what movies were there or not there. On the ancient tech, I saw in the documentary about the last Blockbuster, which does still exist, their computer interface at that Blockbuster video

is the same computer interface I used during the airing of this episode at Blockbuster. I'm sure it's just like DOS POS Garbage. Absolutely, yes. I won't lie. I loved the ritual of checking back in movies, putting them on the shelves. The things that didn't involve talking to people, I did like that as a

video store employee. Well, there are a lot of freeze frame funnies in this episode, and I have to imagine that they were not actually readable until the DVD, because even with the DVD and a big TV, I had to like get close. I had to, you know, take screenshots and

zoom in on them because a lot of these are not well written and we'll cover a few of them but up front we have ski shul the shul being like the kind of jewish schooling we have jerkulees me we have tv show the movie and also president black guy and if in 2025 you have not written your simpsons predicted article here is one that has gone completely overlooked the president black guy VHS and this clearly is just making fun of things like the chris rock movie head of state where it's like the insane idea a black man is president kind of idea. They stay tuned, four and a half years.

And this bit about the adult movie section, that's also funny because in real life at Blockbuster, obviously they don't rent, they didn't even rent softcore porn like Red Shoe Diary type movies there, let alone adult films. But they also would not have a section of mature and challenging films either. That was not in my blockbuster. It's what you'd expect from this area like Merchant Ivory, True Foe.

They do include Unfony, Woody Allen. That means it's high art because it's not funny Woody Allen. It's okay to compliment Woody Allen back then, apparently. It's less so these days. I mean, also, I'm not going to lie, in 2004, did I watch some new Woody Allen movies? Yes, I didn't. I wasn't thinking much about the allegations in the past. It seemed like, nobody else cared.

I guess it's over. I don't like that nervous fellow. And Henry Jaglam, I'm ashamed I've never seen any of his movies. I think I would really at least like reading that book out there. I've heard that it's called My Lunches with Orson Wells, where it's just a transcript of interviews between Henry Jaglam and Orson Well. Oh, that was him. Okay.

I've heard of that book, and it sounds fascinating. But yeah, his name did not ring a bell. Although Mo apparently is renting the 11-part, 1981 British miniseries version of Brideshead revisited. The actual film would not be released until 2008. You know, I do think I rented those two people at the independent video store I worked at five-star video in Berkeley. People would rent a lot of TV shows and miniseries there, too.

Like, our boss liked to, at the front of the store, he put all the Criterion films, which was like them, you know, him showing off, oh, how fancy we are, which I liked. But the moneymaker there was people were renting more TV shows back then and miniseries like the Brightheads revisited of 81 than Criterion Films. Well, I heard five-star video got three stars and five-star magazine. I had a given it three stars. especially the help there, the people who work there. This guy keeps explaining movies.

I'm trying to get out. Part of my fun, you've got to have fun at these type of jobs and these clerk-style jobs. At both Blockbuster and Five Star, I like to feel I had the whole store shelving memorized to the point that if a person asked for a movie, I would be like, I'm going to really show off. I'm not going to look up if it's even in on the computer, and I'm going to walk, eyes closed to the section. pull it off the shelf and hand it to the person. And I feel like I had a pretty good record of pulling that off. I'm not going to say I did it right every time. I had it pretty well memorized.

Do you have like a Blockbuster style organization system set up at home? Yes. It's growing and shifting over time. Like I mean, those shelves over there, like that's mainly the Disney and other animation and then anime and the other two shelves. Actually, the Lupin section down there is in chronological order. Lupon the third, I should say. and the Criterion shells are all the way back over there.

Henry does live in the Criterion closet. When I see the videos of people picking out their movies, I think, are they in Henry's recording studio? Because every wall is a giant bookcase full of DVDs. I spend so much time in video stores that I guess I unintentionally built a video store in my home. I see that. No porno. Now at the five-star video, they had one-star porno because the video store owner knew the profit margins on them.

them were great and that he's like if he bought quality pornography from like big name brands of porn it didn't really matter if he bought those or a pack of like i think like copyright free european porn that was dubbed over that was like public domain pornography he would brag he's like i paid four dollars a disc for these and once they're rented once they have been paid for and it's all profit after that it was the kind of porno that it was like full genital shots on the cover like That's how they're like, we know what you're renting. There's nothing tasteful about this. Well, you know what you're getting that way.

Bart leaves disappointed. We see Homer is also getting disappointed asking about Chocolate Star Wars. Eh, eh. I do like him saying like, no, I'm right here understaffed. That's okay. Yeah, after Homer says, you don't exist. And, okay, I worked hard to get all of these written down here because Marge is looking at videos. We get some more freeze-framed funnies, including transphobia.

When Harry became Sally, whatever, at 2004, for their hateful. Ape chimp. We also have straight trippin' boo, the motion picture, which is a reference to the catchphrase from 2003's Bringing Down the House. You got me straight trip and boo

is what Queen Latifah says. And I think Steve Martin says it, but he's not supposed to say that. He's a white guy. What's he doing? Say these words. Cemetery Academy, C. Triscuit, and Robin Williams' serious

beard movie number 314, which I guess is a joke about Goodwill Hunting, but I was looking at other Robin Williams movies like What Dreams May Come and I guess Insomnia would be out of around this time. Oh, yeah. I don't think he has beards in those. No, he's beardless in those movies.

Those are serious movies. In one hour photo, he's definitely beardless in that too. Yeah, yeah. They're taking his like Oscar winning of having a beard. Also, it's like Fisher King, he does have a beard. I mean, it is a more serious movie. It's not like a dumb comedy, but it is a comedy. The Fisher King is a comedy film.

Yeah, there's some tragedy to it. You're right. but I would not call it a serious movie. But this is clearly referencing the I'm going to try new things era of his life before he goes on to make like old dogs and wild hogs. And then up until his passing, just a lot of mistakes. And, you know, I learned about what a good friend he was of Christopher Reeves in the recent Christopher Reeves doc super slash man about his life and his disability advocacy and all that.

Right, they went to Juilliard together. right? They were roommates, friends for decades. One of the first people to visit Christopher Reeves in the hospital was Robin Williams. Glenn Close is one of people interviewed in it and she makes a sad mention that like, you know, Robin Williams was never the same after Christopher Reeves passed away kind of reference there. Some sad, sad stuff. But happier stuff is the animators snuck in an Iron Giant poster in the background. I always like when they do that. Yeah. There's also a Futurama post. in this scene. Oh yeah. You're right. They had some fun. But speaking of fun, they've come across a

film that was so big that if it was adjusted for inflation, this movie, it would have made $1.4 billion a dollars. That's how big this movie was. Love Story. The way it's indicated by Lenny tells you that what they really were thinking about is the stories told about love story by Robert Emmons, I think. Zero cultural relevance today. Yes, it's so funny that like this is Ian Maxstone Graham remembers and all his

boomer cohorts remember what an event it was and this is a film with like almost no cultural footprint today, I'd say, even though like the lead actress in at Ali McGraw is still alive. She just kind of retired from acting. Yeah, it's hard to tell what they're doing here because part of

it seems about like a kind of biographical, autobiographical of being a kid when this movie is new and kind of being confused by it. But part of it also feels like, oh, kids today don't have respect for these kind of movies because they're not really making fun of Love Story. When Lisa complains about it, I feel like we're supposed to be like, oh, Lisa, don't take it so literally. You're supposed to be on Marge's side here. Now, Love Story, I didn't watch it. I still haven't seen it. And sometimes I do want to watch movies before we see them. But instead, while playing Mario Kart World slash doing my morning

exercises. I did put on in the background on YouTube. The kid stays in the picture, the documentary of Robert Evans' memoirs, which should be called cocaine lies is what the movie should be called. Well, I find I need extra entertainment to make Mario Kart World fun. I mean, I have a good

time, but I was like, you know what, I can listen to Robert Evans, talk about Popeye and love story. Oh, it's going to be a story for the ages. I don't want to shock anyone out there, but I like Mario Card 8 a lot more. A lot more. The open world. I really love how the tracks fit together in the open world. I think it is really clever.

There are more things to find in the open world I live in. So yes, I've never seen love story, but I've heard all about the making of it from Robert Evans' memoir, which we mentioned it before when Robert Evans played himself being interviewed by Charlie Rose on The Simpsons. Both guys who Charlie Rose lived to be canceled, Robert Evans narrowly escaped it, I think. Honestly, He should have been canceled for Kid Notorious. Woof. I guess me, possibly coming soon to what a cartoon. We should really cover Kid Notorious. Yeah, yeah.

In The Kid stays in the picture. He talks about Love Story as his first big win because he was the new executive in charge of Paramount. And he's like, kid makes good. In his version of events, he's just a lucky guy who now is going to prove that he knows how to make a picture. And if you listen to the Robert Evans version of stories, the reason that Chinatown or the The Godfather, our great films, is because he told somebody, hit a home run. I'm making a... Can you make the movie good?

He tells a story of, like, that the first edit of The Godfather comes in, and he tells Coppola, like, I thought you were making a good movie. Where'd you leave it in the kitchen with a pasta sauce? Make it longer. I'm the only executive in Hollywood is going to tell you to make it longer. But Robert Evans loves love story because it's a love story for him. He met Ali McGraw, who he would marry and be married to for a few. years from making that film. Like, it's him falling in love with her. And the way they're having Homer Treat in the episode is how Evans describes it in the movie in his doc, too. The reason it was

a big hit is he says, guys would take women on dates to it. And it was an assured deal closer, let's say. Well, all I know about this is that Ali McGrath. She left Robert Evans for Steve McQueen. If that happened to me, I'd be like, well, that's fair. Yeah, he's oppositely. In his version of events when he mentions that in his memoir movie, he says, you know, it feels bad enough when your lady leaves you. But when she leaves you for Steve McQueen, you feel like the lowest heel in the world. Lenny, you should start a podcast, though, because he points out, it's a Paramount studios for Charlie Bluedorn. That joke is what made me pull back up. The kid stays in the picture because the most entertaining thing in it might be Robert Evans imitating the heavy Austrian accent

of Charlie Bluador and the owner of Paramount, who was like his biggest booster. Yeah, I think he was like a gulf and western executive and when they bought paramount he became the head of the studio and to tie back to the simpsons i was reading about him when he stepped down he hired none other than barry diller to take his place and barry diller would go on to start the fox network seemingly he is a one of the many models for mr burns and still alive as of this recording this goes live in two months and barry diller like hired geoffrey katsenberg so like the main character of the what a cartoon movie franchise too yes and marge is really impressed by the Charlie Bluedhorn gag.

It's good. The last Robert Evans story I'll say is, too, that I just did a tour of the Paramount Lot, me, my husband, and previous guest, Drew Mackey. We all explored it together when I did one of my L.A. trips. And it was fun. Nobody makes movies in Hollywood anymore. So you just get to hear about old movies being made. It's kind of like the box factory of the industry. It's like, oh, no, those movies are made in Atlanta, Georgia. But we did get to see the Robert Evans door with his golden signature on it like this is Robert Evans's meeting room and

he would leave this room to go and direct how to make a love story or whatever so I've touched a lot of this history here though again have not seen this movie that got many people laid back in 1970 yeah good for it here's another example of a joke that

is not attempted because I've seen this joke set up on The Simpsons a few times it's always funny and I'm like where is the joke because Bart is disgusted that Homer is going along for the love story ride he goes say it ain't so ho I don't like that but Homer says well you know Bart watching

Sappy movies for a woman has certain payoffs and Bart says oh it means they'll do something that you want to do later or something that they hate in return and you think he'll go that's right Bart and he'll imagine something that's not sexual at all and I'm fine with them going back to that well that is a running joke

but instead they just go to the next scene I guess the joke is Bart correctly guesses Homer's innuendo or he correctly like sifts through it to understand the point of if you do something nice to your wife, they'll do something they hate in return. That joke sucks, man. I'm totally with you. Like the way Homer

just says exactly, and he does mean it's simply the surface level reading of the joke. Homer means, very likely, some sort of sexual act that he likes that Marge does not like, and she will do it as a return favor. That's the assumption you

make as a viewer, and then what made the Simpsons different is that they would take that assumption and then turn like Zig away from it with a funny like chop chop dig reference yeah that's one of many making bacon on the beach homer eating the sandwich in bed and you know cutting away to a rocking car where he's eating there they've done it enough times where it is a running joke and i wish they would have done it again instead of nothing yes it's like obviously a brand new joke might be the best thing as far as like rating creativity but if you're not going to do that do a good joke

again instead of the bad joke you guys make fun of doing. Yes, it's just really sad that they walk up to repeating a good joke and instead just have a bad joke. It just feels like a missing limb or something. And this is where they come home with their VHS of love story. They plop it in and the family begins watching this classic film with scenes that are basically, at least based on the clips I pulled up on YouTube, are just verbatim the scenes from the movie. Where do I begin To tell the story Of how great a love can be

The sweet love story That is older than the sea The simple something That dumb-deedle, dumb-deedy Now let's push play What can you say about a 25-year-old girl who died? I say bury her before she starts to smell But

A man asked a question Love means never having to say you're sorry. No, it doesn't. This movie is drivel. She's wooden and unpleasant, and no matter what he does, he's still Ryan O'Neill. Opinion noted. Now, if you don't mind, your father and I are trying to lose ourselves in this romantic fantasy. Yeah, we're trying to create a mood here, so shut the hell up. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

He threatens so Homer shakes. his fist at three members of the extended family here. Mackie, does Mankey get it? Oh, I just meant Abe from before to. Oh, right, right, right. And yeah, they do license the song, where do I begin, the theme from Love Story, which I guess the score had been written by someone else, and they wanted to bring in Andy Williams, Andy Williams to do the lyrics, and he did, and this was a big hit too. Yes, here's a little bit of the real song that you can hear Homer and Marge singing. And where do I begin to tell the story of how great a love can be?

The sweet love story that is older than the sea. The simple truth about the love she brings to me. And he says love story right up front. Yeah, it is called The theme from love. story. Back when songs could just be called, Where Do I Begin? Parentheses, the theme from Love Story. Yeah, I miss parentheticals in song titles, bring him back. I like that Bart treats it as MST3K, and

that is the first line of the movie. And the movie starts with the idea of like, you know this is a tragedy. You're watching a movie about a tragic love story where the guy lives, the girl dies. Like, it's the very first scene, so it's, I don't think it's a spoiler to say, it's the story of a girl who dies. Yeah, and I mean, you're going into the movie knowing that. And Ryan O'Neill, Lisa's right, he is a bad guy.

There's a reason why, even though he was a huge movie star, he stopped appearing in movies because he was too abusive, drunk, and cruel for the 70s in films. Oh, wow, I didn't know this. I just assumed she meant like he is a nothing, he is a nobody, he is just a also wooden. So, bad guy. Oh, yes, a bad person personally, though I said this about Robert Evans. I feel like most men who were movie stars in the 70s should be in jail, I think, probably. but Ryan O'Neill, like his, for example, his daughter, Tatum O'Neill, when she won an Oscar.

Okay, this is all I need to know. I know about Tatum O'Neill. Yes, just listen to what Tatum O'Neill went through. And that's just one example. O'Neill, it's all coming together now. I'm sorry. But yeah, but that's why, like, why didn't Ryan O'Neill like starring more things? It's because he was too horrible.

Again, the Robert Evans movie, by the way, in his doc, he just talks about what a fun, great guy, his good buddy Roman Polanski was and this was released in 2002 this is a 2002 release and just about how Roma Polansky great dude very ugly time to be alive and it makes you wonder like oh Robert Evans I wonder why

he thinks Roman Polansky can easily be forgiven or did nothing wrong why would Robert Evans think that I mean the reckoning would only begin in 2017 really he died in 2019 but he was basically a non-entity after I think about 2010 I think but yeah this

Lisa and Bart both hate on it You're supposed to side with Marge I mean this is Marge and Homer Basically reenacting their 70s of like falling in love again While watching love story The inner joke here is Marge and Homer want to fuck And the kids won't let them this entire episode

And that's fine But I think that Marge and Homer should also be loving And I mean the joke is funny But I just feel like oh It chills me to the bone With that thing or if it's earlier where Marge She asked the obvious question, which I'm sure a lot of ladies asked when they were taken to love story. Like, how would you feel if I die?

Would you be sad? And Homer goes, eh, I wouldn't be happy. And Marge goes, oh, homie. Yes. It's a joke about how, like, emotionally distant he is. But still, I'm like, oh, I don't like this. This is where the kids ruin the movie and then the rest of their night in our next clip. Homie, if I died, would you be sad?

Well, it wouldn't be happy. Oh, oh, me. Love means never having to say. A whole canoe made a bologna! BART! Stop fooling with the remote! Risa made me, with a witcher spell. It's called Wicca, and it's empowering. Wicca's a Hollywood fad.

That's cabala, jerk. Stupid kids ruin everything. So, um, you're not in the mood anymore, are you? Homie, you know, I'm usually good for a triple Let's throwdown, but between those kids and going to Uncle Tyrone's, we can't be alone. We're alone, no. You're never alone in this crap shack. You let them!

Over pulls a robocop, strangling part through that wall. That's true, that's true. He's robo-copping that house. Yeah, so we get that awful line, and then we have Marge going, Stupid kids. I hate them so much. And then, and then I'm getting worked up here because this episode's irritating. And then she's like, oh, homie, I'm down for a triple X throwdown.

Yes, it's funny to make Julie Kavner say that. But Marge, she would do a funny euphemism instead of saying like the thing she's just said in that scene. This is like saying, oh, the lore, the lore. But really, it is like character consistency. Marge is the one who brings up the term snuggling, like that she's the one who says it because it's a fun, sweet euphemism for having, March saying she's up for a triple X throwdown is funny enough in a vacuum of like, oh, the cute mom, your friendly mom, when the door closes,

she's down to clown, as I would say. But it doesn't fit with the character of Marge to just be like that, you know, triple X throwdown. It just doesn't fit for Marge. Yeah, a lot of people acting out of character, especially Lisa, although they do have to remember occasionally Lisa's smarts and intelligence and emotionally, I guess, too. By the end of the episode,

Lisa has a moment of like, wait, why was I acting this way the rest of this episode? I shouldn't be doing this. I guess she's too into Wicca right now. That's her problem. Yes, it's corrupting her. Also, jokes about Kabbalah. That just went away. I'm sure there must be some people who still do it in Hollywood, but I assume it's like the

Kabbalah thing. What was it? The joke on 30 Rock was they called it like, it's Judaism meets magic. I think is what they called it. I mean, I'm sure there are some like historical roots where it was treated more sincerely, but I think everyone was just mad at Madonna. Oh, yeah, this is the same season where Homer, they cut it, but we found it of him calling her a bitch. Yes.

By the way, Wicca, I mentioned it before on another podcast, but when I have occasionally done charity at a books to prisoners program, and one of the things they're allowed to ask for is Wicca books. And you actually do, like one in 12 I've fulfilled asked for a book on Wicca. They do have a few at Books to Prisoners. It's interesting. Geez. I guess they're like, eh, it's not real. I wonder if it's like, certainly it is treated as a religious

tome, I think, so it fits under a religious exception. Part of me, though this is like, I feel like I'm taking the side of the prison state by saying this, but I do wonder if it's a trick to like, Wicca books as a religious piece might have naked women featured in it,

and it might be a religious exception to get in because they, you can't get life drawing books, sent to prison or anything like it can't have any nudity in anything well i imagine they have to see it they flip through those books before they send them out can't excite up the blood of those prisoners you can't send any like i feel really bad there are prisoners who ask for like japanese comics and basically any of them and this is like a pg comic like dragon ball has too much blood or nudity to be allowed to be sent to any american prison look america has big horrible

things, but when you really get down in the granule stuff, you see there's a lot of small hearts every part of the machine. It's best to just close your eyes and watch The Simpsons. Not this episode, though. No, no. So, yes, everybody hates everybody. Marge, so life is over as they are about to take, I mean, I guess I can feel too. Maybe Marge is acting out of character because of the stress of a flight. You know, flight stress can put us all in bad moods. I can understand. And we, I mean, this is recent for us. We just recorded the King of the Hill about the airport hell they were in and so we're doing another episode

like that kind of right now where there's a lot of travel a lot of airport jokes even a joke about characters being upgraded to first class this hub being no molasca it's an okay joke I definitely when I was flying more on the East Coast living in Florida I definitely had to fly through

now I will pay the money to take a direct flight it is very rare I take anything that's not a direct flight if I fly but back then East Coast, it would either be I'm flying Delta, got to stop in Atlanta, or I'm flying United, got to stop in Dallas, I think was usually how to ended up. Usually when I fly home or to places that are not super popular, I always have to hit a hub because you're not flying directly to Milwaukee from Vancouver. I'm sorry. They won't let you.

Well, and same, I guess there weren't direct flights home for you when you would visit your family in Ohio either, I would guess. No, no. There is a Youngstown airport, but it's not for like passenger planes or anything. like that. So I would have to fly to Pittsburgh. But then I couldn't always go to Pittsburgh directly. Not even a direct San Francisco to Pittsburgh flight. I don't think so. I mean, maybe they've changed things in the past years. But if you're going to the non-popular cities, then they're like, screw you. You stop at Atlanta. Now what? The Atlanta, as long as it has a varsity hot dogs place in there, it's not all bad as a hub. So meanwhile, across from them are

a bunch of happy honeymooners who are thin and loving. And they hate to their him so much. And they're sexy bodies. Which hey, you know what, you can gain weight without children. You don't have to get fat. Getting married, you just can be fat too. It happened. I guess you had the time to exercise if you're not helping children or caring for them. We see a flashback to their honeymoon, which I guess is that fits within canon. Compared to, there was a joke about their wedding photo earlier in this season where it wasn't canon, but I think they just pulled the character models from their wedding day scene in that episode. This is probably right after Homer gives her the fudgy the whale cake.

Oh, yes, right. Man, it's a similar truck stop. It's right by that. Though, when Homer says, I got to get back to work, like, no, that's the problem with the episode. You don't have a job, Homer. Like, come on. That's true.

That's true. But, hey, they at least mostly remembered that scene from that episode of I Married Marge, which maybe they helped that it's an Algene episode, so he remembers it better and wants to, that's continuity he cares about. Unlike, say, Skinner and Edna, this is continuity he gives the shit about. That's not his continuity. Some guy, he's just made it all up.

So Homer and Marge, they decide, screw that, as the Bible says. They're going to trade their physical tickets to go somewhere else. And this is also a sort of a 9-11 joke of them, like, storming the plane. Like, basically it's a plane hijacking joke. Well, there's an earlier one.

The airport sign says, is now air marshal free right yes okay that's the first 9-11 joke in here yes and then homer and marge basically saying they want to hijack the plane for reasons that seem crazy and then the guy lets him on because he's about to be laid off which uh well i guess when aren't airlines being shuttered but i feel like airlines were going through a rough time in the early odds right yeah yeah a lot of buyouts a lot of closures usually when we cover something from this era that's about an airline and they name check some airlines they're usually not operating anymore. Yeah, I think when we did that happy Thanksgiving episode, too, it was like they listed

like three airlines that no longer exist. So they get on the airplane and all the young people are happy that they're going on their second honeymoon, which is really their first honeymoon, which hit that harder. The flashback is supposed to show Marge and Homer didn't even really have a honeymoon, but Homer had to go back to work. So they could hit that harder of the Simpson saying, Margin Homer saying, now we're finally getting this second honeymoon is all. our first real honeymoon like at least you've got the plot element right there emphasize it more well in general i like a scene that ends with the crowd cheering yay at something bad so it's three different varieties of yays because they announced like we're going on our second honeymoon yay and then

they are talking about blowing off uncle tyrone nobody knows who that is on the plane but they're all like yay and then they find out the pilots like so excited for margin homer he's going to skip all the safety checks Another yay from everybody. And so we head off into the skies and we come back from commercial break. Homer and Marge then find out that they've been upgraded to first class, which I again think these jokes are, this upgrade to first class allows rich comedy writers to write jokes about first class without having your characters be rich.

Well, I guess we no longer even call it first class to remove the class distinction. Oh, that's true. What are they called executive now? Now, depending on the size of your play, And sometimes it's like business class. Like, I'm a businessman. That's right. Yeah, I've passed by business as much as soon, though, tonight I'll be flying Southwest where

we're all cattle. Just are you in priority group or not? For Henry, a coach seat on like Delta's first class compared to Southwest. People are actively tying off and shooting up. You know, now I do fly a lot more Alaska because Seattle is in Alaska Hub, which that sounds backwards. I mean Alaska Airlines, if you don't know that. But just like in Happy Thanksgiving.

that happens to when, in this case, Homer and Marge gets sent to first class. And this is where we get the scene that I suppose has maybe the most cultural impact afterwards of this episode. Sure. Sir, what would you like for dinner? A steak or two steaks? Can I have both? Of course.

This is so luxurious. I feel like I'm Princess Grace and Princess Dye smashed together. And look at me. I'm reading The Economist. Did you know Indonesia? Is that a crossroads? No! It is? Yes, the Economist.

It's a great joke, actually. We missed the joke about Princess Die and Princess Grace smashed together. They both died in car accidents. So it is a joke about the early grisly deaths of royal family members. One from Monaco, one from the UK. You know what? That is a great extra joke there with my... I get so distracted by I'm reading The Economist as a great...

It is a good line about, like, feeling like a smug liberal. Like, it is... Yeah. Eamxto Graham says he is fond of the economist, but it is kind of a, like, self-hating liberal joke of, like, being a smug liberal who thinks they're very smart reading the economists and acting like, they give a shit that Indonesia is at a crossroads. That's like a very good joke about an economist cover, just like a very broad statement that sounds smart.

By the way, I know Diana was the princess of the British Empire, not the UK. I just was trying to be all-inclusive. Yeah, I think growing up and maybe in my 20s, I just looked at the economists. Like, oh, it's a magazine full of information and it seems so smart. And then in our former industry, Henry, there was somebody I know worked with that they prided themselves on reading the economist cover to cover. And I was like, hmm, I wouldn't do that. And then later on in life, probably around 10 years ago, I found out like, here's what the economist actually is. And here is the purpose of the economy.

It's kind of like Reader's Digest, where there's an insidious element to it. Yes, yeah. The Economist is an ancient magazine. Like, it's a British-American both kind of thing. And it is, like, I mean, around when this episode aired, they were big boosters of the invasion of Iraq. They love, the Economist loves most American invasions and war crimes. They were big boosters of most coups that the CIA backed in like the 70s, 80s, 90s. Like, I'll just quote previous guest of our podcast slash co-host of the citations needed to. podcast, Adam Johnson. The Economist is an imperialist rag. Everyone knows that, but it's read by aspirational liberals who sort of want to be in the know. So there you go.

I would also suggest people check out their 2020 episode called The Refined Sociopathy of The Economist. Yeah, I think that's where I really got all the information I needed to know about the economist. If you are a good liberal like we were and you watch

TV and you're like, well, you just need to be informed. And you're, read things in the economists that say, you know what, actually the people in Iraq want to be bombed to death because they want to be free and be helped by America. And you're like, well, the economist says it. It's not just that you go like, ooh, is Indonesia at a crossroads? You say to yourself, oh, well, I guess this country wants to be invaded by us. Or you know what? Maybe these trans bathroom kids are evil. Like, as Adam Johnson says, it lets you present things that are evil to liberals in a way that is not coded as conservative, so they accept them.

That's a good way to put it, because things like Fox News and other outlets like that are obviously evil up front. They're not shy about who they're for. The economists is like, we're going to show you all this information laid out very neatly and cleanly. And really, they're disguised the insidious element of the magazine. And it just so happens that these very objective facts, they just pull together in a very objective way. They just happen to always fall in line with what, like, American government wants or what a rich person wants. It's just so happy. You can't.

Sorry, that's the facts, guys. They're devoted in their mission to make the line go up. So that's the real economist. But now, the economists, though, they like this joke. Boy, does the economist like this joke in Homer reference. They have a sense of humor. These funny guys, like, yeah, the cracked writer Keegan Kelly did an entire history. on this. I think it's been updated a couple times, but that after the Simpsons made this joke,

in the time it takes to publish the Economist by the April 29th publication date, like four days after this, the Economist references this shout out to them and will occasionally make other references, both in text or even in headlines. In a September 2013 story about Indonesia, it was the headline was and it's also the URL is Indonesia at a crossroads question mark I feel like it's such a great joke because on the Simpsons because you could kind of make that any country and then it comes off sounding very smart even though it's like very very broad it's like yes usually with any situation an entity could go one way or the other yeah it is I'll give you Max Stone Graham credit he wrote a good bad head

And also that in November 2024, they also did the headline Indonesia is at a crossroads. It's sort of like it's a land of contrast. Exactly. You can say that about any non-American country is like oh, is this at a crossroads? And also I should

say they all, most of these headlines to fall for the like photo problem that I've seen again, Adam Johnson and Nemeshirazi on citations and you point this out, the like, if you read a story about a Muslim country, this is a separate

example, but when you see them about a Muslim country like, you know, is Afghanistan and a crossroads? And then it's always the same style of picture of a woman in a burqa standing in front of like a mural about America. Like, that's it. Hey, they've got a bit and they're

committed to it. Yeah, I just listened to a great new episode, new at the time from Citations Needed, just talking about the economists going along with the new imperial propaganda they were sent. So, you know, I'm reading the economist and they say bombing people is good for them. It's good for the bomb industry.

Again, make the line go up. Let's do it. That line's going to be going up real soon. It has been... It already has. Yes, yes. This is June 18th, everybody. Hats off. But again, listen, check out that podcast, the refined sociopathy of the economists. Or sociopathie? Maybe I'm saying it wrong.

The economists will let you know they're very smart. You're right. They are smarter than me. I should listen to them about bombing people. Okay. So Homer, March, having a great time. Homer also orders three steaks. That's a good joke, too. It's either one steak or two stakes. Can I have both? He gets three stakes. And it's a classic sticking Abe with the kids plot here. Yes, as seemingly Bart and Lisa watch their parents die on television as a twister flies into the screen, interrupting Kent's story about a dead turtle they cooked, apparently. And I love the Dayton humor because they're not committed to even exploring what Dayton is. And the question is, what is the

hotel and Dayton called, I don't know, Dayton Arms, and that's the name of the hotel. It feels like a would-be Swartzweiler joke of how this twister destroys only that hotel, and then the basement as well. It comes back to, like, just pound the ground the hotel was sitting on. And this is where Lisa and Bart are briefly in mourning. I'm an orphan. I'm a legal guardian. How can I be apparent? I break my teeth on ribbon candy.

Quiet, grandpa. Hello, Mom? Hi, sweetie. We're just calling a check-in. Where are you? Are you okay? Right here in Dayton. At the Dayton Arms Hotel?

Yep, it's really boring. You kids would have hated it. So how's the weather in Dayton? Oh, you know, typical boring Dayton weather. Hey, do I hear a back rub? No, no. That's the noise the phone makes when you've been on too long. Bye now, love you.

Something's fishy. They're not in Dayton. They're somewhere fun. We're not enough fun for them? Well, I know how to find out where they are. Mark does a star 69 and finds out there in Miami. This is more of what annoys me. I'm glad everyone is listening to What Anoyce Me this week.

Well, it's this episode. and Marge just cackling while lying to Lisa Yeah, not even to Bart, to Lisa And Lisa who thought she just watched her mom die Live on television Like a mean-spirited episode I will give him credit for designing a cute new bikini for Marge to wear They didn't just recycle old Marge in a swimsuit outfit

I mean a fun lie is March saying Well, that's the noise the phone makes when I'm on it too long And you know what? This is maybe overreaching, but when I was trying to find I did watch Catch Me If You Can again recently to prepare for this needlessly, but I'll say that, oh, tracking the call back to a hotel is something Tom Hanks does several times in the movie. Although they didn't have Star 6-9 in, what is that, Space Age times, John Madman times. Yeah, yeah. You know, also an important plot point to Catch Me if you can, which I'm surprised comic nerd Al Jean didn't bring up is that a big plot point is old flash comic books of the Silver

age as well as a plot point. This episode seems devoted to not referencing the movie it's named after. Which had to be, you know, if I'm Jeff Nathanson, I'm like, what the hell, guys? You didn't even reference, like, lines I had in the movie. It is them referencing like a new thing. Like, that movie

was like a year old, less than a year old when they were writing it. Yeah, like it's 02. This is early 04. So, I'd assume it made me just like just hit DVD or they were really excited after the theatrical run. It's a great Christmas movie. I did see it in theater. when at Christmastime, it was released on Christmas Day.

I remember during a miserable Christmas week shift at the movie theater, cleaning the theater for Catch Me If You Can a few times. And seeing the last scene multiple times was one of the perks of being an usher. I think they do things differently now, Henry, because now whenever I see a movie, my wife and I are the weirdos who stay throughout the entire credits. They don't start cleaning until everyone is gone. They kind of just wait. They're like, come on, leave.

You know, I saw that recently. too. And I saw ballerina. They didn't leave until the credits were over. And I was leaving, too. Like, yeah, I think, well, at least 22 years ago when we were cleaning theaters. Sometimes it was like, oh, these are all stacked on top of each other. Like this movie is ending around the same time as this movie. So we do need to start cleaning School of Rock before the next showing of Kill Bill, Volume 1, is ending at the same time. And the School of Rock audience members were filthy. You know, I thought of School of Rock first because that's one of my favorite times cleaning a theater because if you see in the movie School of Rock, it ends with the biggest movie star in the world, Jack Black, singing a song in classic Jack Black fashion, and he breaks the fourth wall and is telling you in the audience like, get out of the theater, the people who are here to clean it up or wait for you to leave. And then when you clean the theater a couple times, like for me, I knew, ooh, he's going to sing that. So I need to be standing. It's like I'm part of the movie, so I would stand to the side and wave at the audience

when Jack Black would sing about the people who need to clean up the audience. That's a fun bit. I like when they call out the things happening in the theater. It was fun. It was like Megalopolis in person, apparently. I hear that's what happens in the movie Megalopolis. It's like the Bugs Bunny cartoon where a man stands up. You see the shadow of him walk out.

Is there a doctor in the house? So this is where the Simpsons, Bartonle, to decide they're going to go to Miami. They're going to bring Abe with him. And this is just like their trip to London where it's like, oh, it'd be funny for Abe to go with him. And he has like a dating adventure. And then they don't do enough with it. There's no resolution outside of, I mean, spoilers. He's just like, well, this man is coming on to me, but he also will sit and listen to my stories seemingly. I'm guessing it ends with Abe having sex with Raul off screen. I can only assume. Not to cut to the end there. But also like in 2004, old people dating.

in Florida. It just feels like such a standard joke. I don't know. Yeah. There's some real geyser humor here, which feels kind of dated. Abe at first doesn't want to go because he's expecting calls from telemarketers, but then they impress upon him that ladies need to get ready to settle for

him of all of the widows there. This is where there's the one deleted scene in the episode, a secret deleted scene on the DVD. And this is right after they leave with Abe. They first have to, and point in the series they don't give a shit if you think maggie is missing but the deleted scene

tells you where maggie is and it actually i wish they kept it because patty and selma are where they're dropping off maggie and they make a joke about how they always take care of maggie because maggie can't go with them for stories good question before you play the clip good observation there henry and i was also thinking when this movie this episode was over where was maggie yes so this deleted scene would have answered your question Maggie again? What makes you think we have no lives? Oh, look, the new phone book's here. Let's see if we moved up or down on the page. Oh, my God, we're in bold face. I'll get the camera. Oh, okay. We'll take the kid. Maggie stayed with them so often, they're starting to rub off on her. Look. then Maggie is pretending to smoke with her pacifier.

Yeah. Yeah, maybe cut out the Miami Vice Parity for this. This is funnier than the Miami Vice Parity. I mean, they spent more money imposing on that Miami Vice Parity, but this is funnier to hear, I'd rather hear, Patty and Selma are always good for a telephone book joke, honestly. From Zikowsky and Abramson or... Aronson to Zikowski.

Yes. So apparently this would have answered the question of the reason Maggie is never with the family for multiple stories this season is because they keep dropping her off with Patty and Selma off screen and you never hear about it. Well, I wish they would have kept it. Cut back to Margin Homer. This is the part of the really confuse me

because I just assumed Margin Homer had been off screen together and when I just assumed they have been having sex the second they got to the hotel, right? Yeah, yeah. I mean, I'm not sure why they're deluxe. delaying it because Homer has a line like tonight will finally romantically hump and I'm thinking you've had so many chances. This is really on you if you have not had sex yet and you really want to have sex as badly. Yeah, it's like I have to think for parents again with the childless here,

but it's like I would say the second you get off the plane and you get in that hotel room like you're getting down to business and then you're going to the pool. We know how parents are so excited that they call nights out with each other date night. Exactly. You know, that's a fun terminology I like to use too. I'm trying to shut that down, Henry. You have to have children to make it a date night. Are you getting away from your responsibilities? All the little podcast running around at home?

Well, this is where Homer and Marge also have some mean-spirited laughs at The Childless. Boy, it's great being here without those children of yours. Yeah. I've never sat by a pool this long without having to apologize to someone. And tonight

will finally and romantically hump. Here's the life without children. Well, we can't wait to have kids. You can't wait. Seriously, with the new breast pumps and diaper genies and corporate flex time, child rearing ought to be a snap. You keep thinking that.

Yeah, again, more mean-spirited stuff. I'm not on the side of these people who, are naive, but just the cutting away to Homer and Marge, like literally ruffling. They're ruffling, everybody. At least it's funny animation for them rolling around. I'll say that for it. But yeah, it's just, this is coming from the place of, you know, Al Jean

and the other parents on the staff who see younger people, like who, I don't know, Matt Selman maybe is planning a family at that point. And they're just laughing at them like, oh, you think it's going to be easier now with all the technology. Like, no. No, it's not. Though, also, I don't know. If you're, if you're laughing at another Simpsons writer, I feel like you should all agree, like, we know we can hire a nanny.

All of us can afford at least two nannies here. Really, you're pointing the finger at all these rich writers, Henry. I do think the show, a general problem I have with the show in these later years is they forget how to, they make the same money in season two or three probably is around what they're making now, but they forgot what it's like to not be rich, I think. The economy of The Simpsons really went out the window before season 10. Sure, sure. That's true.

And, I mean, look, I can understand that even if you can afford a nanny type situation or other help, that it still is stressful to be apparent. I can get it. I can, but still, I, the Simpsons laughing at these people is like, it is mean. I don't think every writer on The Simpsons has nanny money, especially now. Okay, sure. Does a co-EP or a story editor, they can't afford a nanny, totally. I agree with that. But also, you know what, now they work from home so much that maybe the child care is easier then.

And then eventually they can help you write a script. Really, they need to hire nannies who are WGA-approved nannies to train the next generation of Simpsons writers. They could be changing diapers and teaching writing workshops in your home. So we then cut to part, Lisa and Abe arriving. And they have run over E-More on their way to Orlando, who's brown. So it's a parody. everything happens to Emore If they didn't say it on a commentary

That his name was E-more I just my ears chose to hear E-O On the first listen of it But now they can use E-O Although they probably wouldn't be allowed to I mean now they would not even be allowed To have the joke of like you ran over someone At Disney World

No You simply can You know also they did the joke about Chocolate Star Wars I was like wait a minute Cosmic Wars replaces Star Wars In this universe too guy That's true

They leave Abe and he talks about how they're in need of TLC, the ladies, a tired, liver spotted coot. Matt Graining has very little to say on this commentary except to point out little flaws like the Simpsons Band-aids are the color of, you know, Caucasian flesh tone. Yes, it's kind of weird. And then we don't need to go over all this, but there's a Miami Vice montage. And the second it started, I've seen this before, but I was like, oh, they couldn't be doing this in 2004. and then I look up the opening on YouTube and it's like, yes, they're doing it

and yes, it does sound like they just license the music and there aren't a lot of big jokes in this, although one I see parodied a lot, or not parody a lot, gift a lot. And that is the scene of the guys with the boombox and they are passed by the old people carrying

the hi-fi stereo system and doing like the pointing finger dance. Always fun to wiggle your finger in a dance. I don't know why, but I do see that gift a lot on social media. That is the funniest joke among those. But that joke takes like 45 seconds to play out because you have to watch the guys

like grooving by with their boombox very slowly across the screen and then they're trailed by the old people but it feels like it takes a lot of time to sell that joke. It feels like it takes double the time it should take to do it just to, they wanted to play boogie-wogie bugle boy by the Andrews sisters and maybe that effed up the timing of the joke and they had to like extend it longer. I mean it's funny animation and I like the concept.

But it just, when you're doing your Catch Me If You Can parody, we're really getting away from the point here. Yes. To make room for like a Miami Vice parody in 2004, it's like it's 20 years old, but it's not old enough like to be nostalgia. It's just it feels like a musty reference. The Michael Man movie isn't out yet, although that is very little to do with the TV series to the point where I'm like, why do they bother naming it this? But Catch Me If You Can is two and a half hours long. You can't find enough to mind from that for a 20 minute episode. Yeah.

Miami Vice. Honestly, I'm glad you had told me beforehand. You're like, God, they had a Miami Vice thing because I just let this sequence just wash over me. I had turned off my brain to think it was because I just thought I was like, oh, kind of tired old people jokes. Like I didn't realize the timing like straight from

the girl looking down her sunglasses should have been like, no, this is Miami Vice. Why am I getting it? Like it kicks off the scene of the flamingos flying by, but yes, that's what they're doing. And yeah, it's just old people humor. Again, I feel like this is done better by The Simpsons and also like

Family Guy would have done a better Miami Vice shot for shot parody as well I think they'd have pulled it off better not funnier but technically speaking done better though hey they wouldn't have had Yardley Smith get to do a one off voice for a change God bless that man

I think they realized that maybe at the table read they're like well wait Tress can't do all three women in this scene like that's too much they realize like every once in a while they will have Yardley Smith play an old lady like a very old lady. Though every time you hear it,

I mean, it does stand out in this little clip here. Check out the well-aged feet. No scar. He must be on his first heart. I wouldn't kick him out of bed for dying. Hey, handsome. Pull up a donut and sit out.

Hey, ladies. I used to be in movies. Oh, I like it. You know those feet sticking out from under the house in the Wizard of Oz? You're looking at them. Yeah, in case you're wondering why that scene begins with Abe wearing black and white striped socks, like Beetlejuice or something, that's the reason why the animation's funny, but also it makes Abe like 90 years old in 2004. Yeah, he's already aged quite a lot at this point, but it is funny animation that it disgusts all these women who, this is like a slam dunk for him.

There's so few men left. That is the joke in a million of these, like, old people stories. or old romance stories of like, if you're a man who has made it over the age of 80, the odds are in your favor at most retirement villages, was the joke in movies back then? Bob, was it you that told me about how like STDs spread quite a lot at old folks' homes like this? It's something I've heard,

and I'm sure there are plenty of articles that back this up, but yeah, there is unprotected sex at, you know, old folks' homes, retirement villages, whatever you want to call them, and yes, you can still get like herpes and chlamydia and all the greats if you're old in having sex. Hey, speaking of dated 80s references, Homer then comes in singing a version of Gloria Stephan's Conga, except talking about Paul Songas in Congress, who had not been part of Congress since 1985, which makes me think this was a joke he wrote for Johnny Carson, and he's pulling it out of storage. I think he was dead, Paul Songas, because he died pretty young. Yeah, 97. He passed away, so.

I mean, doesn't that feel like a Johnny Carson Riders room thing of like, you know, Songus in Congress rhymes. It does feel like a stuffy old Tonight Show monologue joke, yeah. It sounds like Paul Songas the last time he really made national headlines was he was like the guy who Bill Clinton beat to be the Dem nominee in 1992. I think that's the only reason I

can remember his name. We get Marge once again furious at her horrible children beyond belief. But we also, it's one of my favorite things about itchy and Scratchy Land. The way Julie Kavner says, vacation. I love it. I don't know where she gets it from. She was raised in Los Angeles. But

I just love vocation. It is funny. I note it now every time since you pointed it out years ago. Now I notice every time Kavanaugh says vocation. Al Jean, even he is poking holes in his own story in the commentary. At the rare times where they're talking about the episode instead of the career of Jeff Nathanson, Al Jean points out, if that was my children who somehow traveled this way alone, I would be in shock in wanting to know what happened, not running from them.

I think Al Jets been thinking about this for a very long time, Way back on like the moaning Lisa commentary, he was like, I would lose my mind if my daughter went out a night and played jazz on a bridge with some stranger. Yeah, yeah, he's, I mean, that, hey, this is the helicopter parents that people were complaining about. I think he's being reasonable. No, no, he is.

Also, yeah, Paul Songas was known, get this, Bob. He was socially liberal, but fiscally conservative. Oh, that means he's super smart. He was a big-time guy who cared about the deficit. A very important thing to care about. Deficit Hawk. I don't know why, but when I hear the name Paul Songas, Al Franken is saying it. It definitely seems like maybe he played Paul Songas in a weekend update scene or something.

Or we read about him in lies and the lying liars who tell them, which both me and you read very happily at this time. I read all the Al Franken books and bookstores would not take them when I was done. Those were at Berkeley, we have enough of these Al Franken books. Like, you're better off burning this thing. Any college town, it's like just use us to prop up a table or something because we have. have eight copies of this already. Isn't it nice that, like, Bill O'Reilly, like, simply doesn't matter anymore. His Bill O'Reilly book, like, it really, it's just what happens, it's reassuring in a way

that all these pieces of shit, like him or Rush Limbaugh, like, once their usefulness is done, they may as well not have existed when their vacuum is filled by the new, like, asshole. Yeah, we're on to, like, the eighth version of him by now. And so, so just remind yourself of that now, and you see the next asshole who replaces them, know that they won't matter when they die or exposed as a massive sex criminal. We're being just as vicious as Margin Homer here. This episode does put us in a bad. Well, negativity.

I'm being negative too. I feel like we're just super cranky. It's August, everybody. How's the summer treating you? You slurping on a popsicle? You go and swimming, having fun? We should be having fun in swimming costumes like Abe here. So yes, they decide that they got to get away again.

And, you know, they talk about how they won't. They got to do it because they're, They'll never be alone again until they lose contact with Bart and Lisa goes off to college. Forgetting Maggie exists again, but that's consistent for Homer. They understand that Bart will become estranged. You know what? Just like Leonardo DiCaprio's character in the movie, Homer Simpson steals money via identity theft. There, see?

Sure. Yeah, no, it doesn't really fit. Yeah. They could have done like a Cape Fear style episode with this and just done a B for B parody. I mean, I know it's hard because of, it's not like a family or it's not like a mother and father trying to escape the law. or whatever's happening in that movie. It's much different. The gutsy or younger Simpsons writers,

when they have senioritis, that's when they're like, oh, yeah, just shot for shot, Cape Fear for two whole acts. We're just doing it. But it's harder for them at this time, especially like they're older, they're more tired,

they're nearing the end of the season. But this is where the chase begins with stolen credit cards. Come on, everybody, have some sexual Congress. Not the kind of Congress that contain Polsongus. The kids try.

A romantic holiday just became a stinking family vacation. March, I won't let that happen. We have to grab this chance for romance now, but we'll never be alone. Not till Lisa's in college, and we've lost contact with Bart. You're right. But where do we go? I've got a card that can take us anywhere in the world. Stop on it! Those horrid dogs, they ditched us again.

You know what this means? We have a free hotel room in Miami for two days? No, we're going to follow them across this great land, making sure they don't have one moment of fun. And I have a card that can take us anywhere they go. Now, why does Rod Flanders have a visa card? Why is that? That's the last joke in the episode, and I have terrible news for everyone out there.

This episode is only half over. Not our episode, but this episode of The Simpsons, because Act 2 ends with like nine or ten minutes to spare. Man, all to make room for the, like, what, 90 seconds, two minutes? Well, I guess we don't really have to go over that in great detail other than to talk about what it is, the direct parody. Homer and Marge, like, abandoning them in Miami. The joke about, like, the take is wherever we want to go. I guess it's a play on the credit card logo. go like everywhere you want to be

that Troy McClure once said as well sure this is again how they can do things impossibly with money for Leonardo Caprius character and Catch Me if he can is because he is a master of check fraud ahead of everybody else and that's how he like becomes a millionaire of just stealing millions and millions

of dollars I guess they are thinking about the Simpsons in their income because they have to give them a reason to be able to afford all of this and with no punishment doing this to Flyers either no don't forgive them or his God will punish him. So we cut to, or the next act begins at the Miami Airport, formerly the Everglades, and I will say, you can, and catch me if you can, the Miami airport is used in a major plot point

as well. So, hey, there's another connection. I'll give him that. Sure, I'll give him that. Lisa distracts the guard by trying to go into the gold member lounge with silver membership. The guy pulls a shotgun on her and seems we'll try to kill her. Another example of this episode just being very mean. I like the sniper joke in Lisa the Iconiclast. This is like Bart getting a man to turn a gun on his sister essentially. Lisa doesn't seem to mind those. She seems

to be okay with that plan. And Bart hacks the computer and finds out where they were going. And man, I don't know. He changes to a low-fat meal and then Homer sat on the plane. It's like, eh. Yeah, that's another thing where I'm like, I'm looking

for the joke because we just, he says, I'm going to change Homer's meal to low-fat. that we just get an exterior shot of the plane and hear him screaming. And then we go away from that scene. So it's like, you are the Simpsons. Please give me something else. You're giving me a regular sitcom joke to that cutaway. Like there needs to,

Homer should say something else there. I feel like even in the Mike and Al years, they wouldn't settle for this. This is why on the commentary, they're mainly talking to the writer of Catch Me if you can about his movie, not this episode. We get the next angle at Abe as he strikes out once more.

more boring than my husband, and he's dead. Well, I bet I smell better. At the moment, it's about even. I can't wait till we bury the last of you, Hepburn types. Really? Perhaps I can help. I have a penthouse from which you can see all the way to Epcot. If you take a woman there, she will be yours.

Hatsigety! Indeed, I am Raoul. While we walk, may I place my hand on your shoulder as a sign of friendship. Why not? Hot diggety is the old grandpa catchphrase that I think maybe Bill and Josh might have invented. Oh, right. He did used to say that.

So, Abe is being picked up again by an old gay guy. Like, this is another, like this frail old guy, they on the commentary, they do mock that, like, this is just them writing the Agadore character that Angazaria played already in Birdcage that then became Julio.

And now they're like, but what if he was old? Same guy, but just all. And I think we were talking about this before the recording, but this episode won the Writers Guild Award for a television animation, that category. And they're still doing this. And we've whined about this. We've griped about this. But this is one of the many years where they submitted four episodes.

So it's Four Simpsons and then an episode of Justice League. Wow. And you know what? Justice League was killing it in the year 2003 and 2004. It should have gotten the win. I don't care. Whatever episode it was, it was better than the four episodes of Simpsons that were. nominated i'm sure and here's the thing next year there are six nominees for that award and they're

all simpsons episodes six and they're all simpsons where was king of the hill boom yeah i know i again if it's like fine it can only be things that are guild there was like you're saying king of the hill was on at the same time like folks we like the simpsons we've liked episodes from season 15 this is a dark time the guild is really being like it's all it it verges on cronyism i would the ledge. But this rebel thing, also it reminds me that like, they occasionally like writing jokes about or plotlines where a man hits on Abe. The season 30 had mad about the toy where like an army buddy of his Abe learns was in love with him. If anybody remembers that one, I remember it because when we had Matt Christman on the show for the first time, he had just

arrived in San Francisco from Los Angeles and was telling us that he was at the table read for that episode. Oh, I forgot about that. Okay. And because I remember him mentioning that like another man is in love with Abe, but at the end of the episode, Abe rejects him. And I think I don't want to put words in his mouth. He's a brilliant, brilliant man. But I believe he said like, just have Abe be by. Who cares? Like, why have him just turn him down at the end? Who gives a shit? 30 just do it yes it's season 30 Abe should just be like hey you know what I like you to and kiss the guy back like I get they're committed to like well Abe is just a heterosexual man like fine but who cares just

have him be by who gives the shit like meanwhile I've been watching a million episodes of American dad and when my husband and I are watching it and he asked me like well so wait what is this character sexuality and I tell him that almost every character on American dad is situationally bisexual if it makes a joke funny that seems to be the case yeah and they're not afraid of it other than Haley I think the joke with Haley

the liberal hippie girl is she isn't by and it only and is like that she actually is kind of conservative in her sexuality I suppose but that's the joke but yeah so you compare American Dad to where every character is by for a gag

to hear where it's like if they kissed a man who cares And then you don't even have to, if you were weird about it, you could just not acknowledge it in the future because it could just be a one-off joke. Yeah. So we heard about that episode months before it aired because Matt Crispin told us about being at the table report. He violated the NDA and we did report him. So we cut to New Jersey. They're going to Atlantic City.

And literally in my notes, I wrote like, boy, thank God there's no Trump joke here. Tate type, type. Oh, wait. Yes. The Trump brothel. They predicted it? I don't know. I mean, he has hotels.

We all know about Donald Trump, even in 2004. The Apprentice is exploding on television right now. Yeah, it's crazy. I mean, but Atlantic City, like, he was such a big part of Atlantic City that, like, obviously there's going to be a joke there. But I was really hoping there wouldn't be. But then, yeah, Trump brothel just a bring down of a joke. I prefer the joke in the first episode of The Critic of that Trump Tower was being foreclosed in that joke. What's funnier?

much more heartwarming. This is where we also get a joke about how Homer is making out with Marge and that a fat guy making out with a lady is so ubiquitous in New Jersey. It's the state flag, which I assume is kind of a Sopranos joke, I'd say. Could be, could be. I don't know where King of Queens takes place. I guess New York. Well, Queens are right?

Yeah. But it's New Jersey adjacent. It's the same fat guy with hot lady. It's many stories. And this is when they spot Bart and Lisa in the adjacent elevator because it's a glass elevator. And more like cruelty from Marge where she's like throwing Bart into the bus saying like that boy failed show and tell but he's on our ass like Sherlock Holmes. I know.

It makes me sad Marge would say this about her special little guy. Yeah, it's like my son's a fucking idiot. This dumb motherfucker can track us down. This is where we also get a funny thing in The Simpsons is that through the character with Drederick Tatum, you basically can follow the entire life of Mike Tyson up to today when he appears in the TV show. So where was Mike Tyson at? in 2003? Well, let's hear. That boy failed show and tell, but he's on our ass like Sherlock Holmes.

Hey, how you doing? I'm fighting a white rhino today at the Tropicana. Shows the 24, 6, 8, 10, and midnight. Check it out. Come on. Hey, kids, I'm tying balloons on the boardwalk at 3, 5, 7, 9, and 11. Check it out. Come on. Don't be ridiculous. Good joke with Drederick Tatum because immediately, I am explaining the joke, but immediately you're like, wow, he is fighting a rhino a lot and then you find out in the off hours he's doing the balloon tying. Every even hour is a rhino fight and every odd hour is the tying balloons. It's a good gag about his desperation because in the year 2003 when this would have been written, Mike Tyson had gone bankrupt.

people were talking about like he was one of the richest boxers ever he lost all of his money it also was the same year that he had his last professional win as a boxer he would box more after this but he wouldn't win another fight he also teased he was going to do a kickboxing match in japan until he learned he could not travel to japan because he's a felon and it's the same year that he got his face tattoo as well okay the famous face tattoo got it at some point drederick tatum starts having a face tattoo as well and it's the same year that he got a face tattoo as well But I don't know if it, I'll be on watch if it's his next appearance in the show. Does he get the face tattoo to match Mike Tyson's? Well, we've reached the point of this episode. And the entire rest of the episode is just supporting this thing that they're all building towards. And I'll say, I understand it seems like work went into this, but I don't like this. I think they did a bad job. And it really lacks confidence.

And I really associate this era of The Simpsons with lacking confidence, even though they're in season 15 because they're doing the Catch Me If You Can title sequence which is fine but they lack the confidence to commit because they just draw the Simpsons heads as they're normally drawn. The bodies are somewhat simplified I would say not enough but they're like

oh shit we need to get the heads on the screen people aren't going to know what we're doing so that ruins whatever they're trying to do here with this parody and I will say I think it's a mistake to do this parody also because when you're watching Catch Me if you can this is the title sequence

You're getting your popcorn, you're sitting down, you're letting the movie let you know its intent. It's not about, like, big jokes and big ideas. It's like, here's just a way to let you know, like, what we're doing. And then when you're doing this in The Simpsons, 20 minutes into an episode, you're like, well, there's no jokes. I'm just meant to sit here and appreciate this. Well, Bob, Mo is dressed like a nun. I don't know what you're talking about. That's hilarious.

Thumbs down, thumbs down. That's the one thing that's like a joke. Otherwise, you're right. This is just played as Bart and Lisa are chasing Margin Homer. like the FBI man is chasing Leonardo DiCaprio in the opening of it too. And, well, it's also, you know, the Catch Me if You Can opening, it is kind of funny in that similar way. Like, it's played as like a Pink Panther silent cartoon of one guy chasing another guy kind of story. Yeah, I watched it, but it does feel more like a mood setting piece than like a wild cartoon or anything with like gags.

It's like, okay, I'm getting into like what the era is, what the vibe of the music is, some, some, sort of like iconography of that era so it works there but here I feel like if it's not funny it's taking up a lot of time and I feel like you guys are so proud of yourselves for doing this aren't you that's what I feel from the scene and it's like the let's not funny well the

I think too and the intent in the movie is that Stephen Spielberg is doing a period film set in the 60s probably one of his favorite directors he grew up loving in the 60s was Alfred Hitchcock and this is a Saul Bass style

opening visually too. Yes, yes. I mean, the original sequence is great. I do like it, but I think they're just very proud of themselves that they're doing this, and then they just go as far as to license the actual music. So it just feels kind of smoke to me and not funny. Did like hearing Nathan's story about how John Williams seemingly wrote this song overnight, the one used in the episode and in the film.

Yes, apparently they had some other track, and they didn't like it or something like that. So John Williams just worked his magic. It is crazy that John Williams Like that piece of music By John Williams is probably like His 40th most famous musical theme because he wrote so many And yet it is an amazing piece of music

That's like unforgettable, iconic Now that the opening For the movie was done by the Paris-based animation studio Kunzel and Degas I'm assuming that sounds pronounced But they did a really good job But the EMAX-O-Gram on the commentary credits Colin Heck as a story artist for

this section of the who boarded it and i'm with you bob that like there should have been more confidence they should have trusted colin heck to if they're going to have a silent or dialogue-free section like this then let an animator make up jokes that can be executed in animation don't write jokes for him i think colin heck maybe could have been trusted more i mean too you compare it to style parodies like when they just recently did the parody of primal episode they emulate that art style more they didn't just paste on the regular head of the Simpsons on top of it. Yes, yes.

I feel like they've done this much better before and after. This time, though, it just smacks of lack of confidence. Not even necessarily on the artist side. I feel like, knowing what I know about the writers and the producers, I feel like someone thought, well, if you just tune in this, you're not going to know what's happening. So just make sure all the heads are how we normally see them. And that just feels like, well, 90% of this is in one art style,

but the heads are just in a different art style because you think I'm stupid. I think it's the same lack of confidence. that makes them make lame jokes in the movie that they're writing around the same time of just like, they don't trust the audience to know the Rainier Wolfcastle characters. They make him Arnold Schwarzenegger, same deal here. Like, Bart, the family's heads

could have been just as stylized, but they were scared that stylized heads would really make people change the channel, I think. And you have characters who have some of the most distinct silhouettes in all of cartoondom. So if you have a silhouette of Homer and someone doesn't know who that is,

that's on them. Yeah, I'm with you, Bob, that if they're going to take a big enough swing of Let's for like 90 seconds go to the trouble of getting the rights to the John Williams music and imitate the opening of this film, then stylistically go all the way with it if you're going to put all of that money and time into it rather than paste on the heads out of like a fear of that that instead just makes it less interesting, funny, or artistically driven. Yeah. I mean, not to go on too long. I enjoy parodies on The Simpsons. Some of the best scenes have been parodies of movies and TV, but they will add jokes. It doesn't seem as smug as like, look what we did. We used it for an art style. It's like, well, what's funny about it. Nothing. Now, I do want to mention Colin Heck real quick because this led me to his personal website, and I wanted to see what he'd been up to. He's longtime film Roman guy who has left the company recently, but worked on a lot of Simpsons. But most interesting to me is one, according to his personal.

website resume he was a director on some of the c c lemon ads for japan as well as the assistant director on the animation for the simpsons the ride and most interestingly on his website he uploaded to vimeo basically a unused simpson short it's 90 seconds long it's called homer in his shadow it is silent and he actually puts in the descriptions to save money we were told to write us so the animators can pitch a short that has no dialogue in it. So this was mine. And it's Homer has an old iPod and listens to Mr. Fahrenheit,

Don't Stop Me Now, that song by Queen, and dances with his shadow. And so it's, you know, it's a classic cartoon conceit. It looks like Real Simpsons. It was apparently paid for by Fox. Colin Heck directed it. It's very interesting to see this fully deleted like 90 second full color animated

Simpsons short. I'll take that over the recent shorts. Sure, have fun. Like, have fun with animation. New ideas, not just like promotional pieces. But, yeah, I just saw like he was directing on Harley Quinn and other things. So he still is in animation. But not blaming him.

Obviously, work went into this. But it feels like somebody had zero confidence. And in general, I don't like the idea of this piece. But then they ruin even further by not being confident. The bit of it, like, oh, the snowmobile chase and them in outfits, like, that's not really a joke either. it's, I guess it's like, maybe it's like the scene from true lies, perhaps, but it feels like nothing. It just kind of becomes like a James Bond pastiche. And I guess, well, you're heightening this. Is that the joke?

I don't know. Again, it's like Mo as a nun. All right. Sure. I think then the joke, after all of that is they cut to Homer on the toilet and this was all his dream. And this is like, I want to say it's this pubic mound, but this is the most of Homer's like, it's the area right above the base of his penis we are seeing in this shot. It's like a Peter Griffin deal where you can never see his penis because his stomach is always covering it. Right.

It's a funny drawing, I will say, in a vacuum of just this low angle of Homer on an airplane toilet falling asleep. But it's kind of an empty ending to the sequence, too, after all that. So meanwhile, speaking of empty endings, let's hear the end of Abe's story here. Will Abe get laid? Okay, Raoul. Let's go meet some signoritas. Grandpa, I must confess, I am not as interested in women as my open shirt might suggest. To be frank, they disgust me. Uh-oh.

Yes. Now let us enjoy one of your rambling, disjointed, yet somehow erotic tales. Are you going to go lavender on me? We shall see, huh? But I promise you I will treasure every word that drops from your beautiful lips. Really? You're sweet. Proceed.

For many years, I was a Tater farmer, but the shameful truth is that Tators farmed me. Your neck skin dances when you speak. I do like how he calls him Grandpa. Like, that's his name. So he had sex

with Raoul, right? I mean... Yeah, I mean, I don't know. I feel like now this is elder abuse. Well, where does this end? Like, this is the last time we see Grandpa. He's like, Oh, you're sweet. I feel like there needs to be something else here. Like, says, you're not going to go Lavender on me.

Then he keeps talking while Raoul deafens himself with a switch on his hearing aid. Yeah, I just, basically, Abe is like, are we going to have sex? And he says, we shall see. So I guess we don't. For Abe, like, telling someone a boring story is better than sex. I would assume they both just fall asleep and don't have sex. I mean, this is nearing, you know, forcing grandpa into a situation he doesn't want to be in. Like this is getting into non-consensual territory, which obviously that's jokes in 2004, is non-consensual sex.

These are normal jokes in the early odds. But yeah, we never see them again. And that's again where I'm like, oh, I guess maybe Raul eventually convinced him or he fell asleep. The comedy version of this is that Abe is more boring than Raul is horny. And eventually his stories go so long that Raul is like, you know what? Nah, not worth it. Yeah, I guess this is a, now choose your own ending for Abe and Raul. Who needs a writer when you can just imagine the ending yourself?

So that's the end of that story. We go to Niagara Falls now, which is not a setting and catch me if you can, as I recall. But it is the setting of Superman 2, which I also watched recently, which also is about the honeymoon suite for Clark and Lois. They're in the honeymoon suite Niagara Falls. I'll say it's about 45 minutes too long. Superman 2 is a very long. I liked it less than I remembered.

It's full of very corny stuff. Superman accidentally reveals the secret identity by like tripping. It's so stupid. This time, Homer, he's about to finally have sex with Marge. And it is such a quick shot. It feels like a sensor made them shorten it. But Homer's speedo is riding up even more than Brazil. Like, we see so much of his ass in that speedo.

I mean, back to back, Homer spread eagle on a toilet sleeping. We're seeing a lot of Homer's surface area. Homer's about to go down, go to work. but they realize that the waiter's still there. And Homer tips him with a giant wad of cash, which even when it's Ned's money, that still feels like Homer wouldn't be that good of a tipper. And they say they're about to eat before having sex

and then boom, the reveal, Bart and Lisa were there the whole time to ruin everything. I don't like Bart and Lisa being too close to this sexual activity. They even say that on the commentary. So, like, if they didn't find Bart and Lisa, they just hear their parents having sex. You're right. If Homer is about to take the lid off and then he goes,

You know what? Let's eat afterwards. And then they do it. I would guess Lisa would have to go like, no, stop. Like she would have to reveal herself. Lisa's aware of the sex because she calls them horn dogs. Yeah. I don't want them to be too aware of their parents wanting to have sex, too. But this is where Bart and Lisa make sure their parents are miserable.

And now, my darling, it's finally time for romance. But before the intercourse, the dinnercourse! Busted! You guys lied to us. You probably do this all the time. This whole family is built on a tissue of lies and romance. Yeah, it's a tissue covered in blood and boogers! Would you two just shut up? Sure, we lied.

We lied so we could spend a single night as a married couple without worrying about you kids. Those days are over. Give it up. You win, kids. Just sleep here tonight and we'll all go back. Back to Springfield tomorrow. Great. What do you want to play?

How about the floor is made of lava? All I wanted was his second honeymoon. And now the floor is made of lava. Homer just taking this literally, just adding to his pain. Man, it's just, at least Kavanaugh is getting something to do. But the way she yells at them, like, yes, we lied. Yeah, just hearing her say shut up to Barton Lisa. I mean, Lisa is not acting like yourself either here.

Nobody's acting like themselves, except for Homer. I guess Homer wants to have sex. He's acting pretty Homer-like. And this is where Lisa that night finally realizes like, oh, wait, this is the character I am, the person who would have realized I've gone too far. So she decides like, I think the way she puts it as the hunt is more fun than the catch, that at least feels like, like something like that Lisa got into the hunt. There's good Lisa and Bart stuff here. We have to pick out the

gems out of this poop just to show them that there are good jokes out there. But Bart zings Lisa. She ignores it and just goes on with the scene and Bart's like, you didn't recognize my zing and she's like, yes, my new thing is to ignore you. And he throws an alarm clock at her unmoving head. Yes. She gives no reaction to it and

then says like when you're ready to be an adult I'll be outside. He's like, I'm an adult now. Bart loses on this one. and so they decide they're going to head out to have fun without the parents to give Margin Homer time to themselves but Margin Homer have already snuck away there's pillows left in their beds too and this is I say I'll like the line when Homer says

kids don't beat me I beat kids and nobody does it better sure clever enough but they're on the Ferris wheel but it turns out Bart and Lisa they're on the Ferris wheel too Which, meanwhile, my mom terrified of Ferris wheels. She closes her eyes the entire time. She cannot stand them. I didn't think they were that scary until I went on the one at California Adventure.

And it's one of those ones where I'm used to the Ferris Wheel just going around and around and around. This one, it just loads people as it goes up. So you're kind of like stuck at very high heights for a very long time until you work your way back down. It is a very high one. I like it just fine. Though, again, I'm not saying I'm like, oh, I'm so brave. I still, a roller coaster like the Hulk roller coaster in Universal is still too scary for me. Upside down over water, that's too much.

But Ferris wheels I can take, even that one in California Adventure or similar tall ones. But my mom, when I took her on the California Adventure one, I scrunch clothes and we're like, Mom, look, look. And she's like, no, no, like she won't do it. We're in a safe Disney cage. We even made sure we got in the line for the non-moving one. There's like the swinging godula and the non-swinging one. So we didn't prank her and say, oh, yeah, this is the non-swinging one, and then it's the swinging one.

I wouldn't do that to my mom, no. Bart and Lisa are revealed to be there, but they unintentionally followed them. This is the last straw. Homer and Marge scream at them. They won't even listen to Lisa finishing her words. And as they escape, they have sexy results. They knew if we got up early enough, we could sneak a little. from Bart and Lisa. Kids don't beat me. I beat kids. And nobody does it better.

You monsters! You followed us! No, you don't understand. We came here to give you some privacy yet. We understand perfectly well. Let me finish my sentence! Never! This way! Wait, we can hide in here. I don't know.

Only, why don't we just go home? Wait till the kids fall asleep. the kids fall asleep and have sex in the car. Because I was saving that for my birthday. Now, come on. This must be what it's like to be in space. You've been to space. And yet, I've never been to me. Oh, I don't like how that joke ends.

We'll talk about the reference in a second. But it's funny that this episode goes live almost exactly 10 years after Deep Space Homer because that was February of 94. Now we, I believe, April of 04. Yeah. They're still clowning on themselves of like, isn't it crazy we had Homer go to space? Characters always have to remind Homer that he's been an astronaut. Just because it's so ridiculous.

But yeah, wait, that line Homer says in response is a reference. Yes, it's a reference to the song I've never been to me, which was a hit by the singer Charlene. It was released in 77. It became a hit in 82 when it was re-released. So it's a very classic, easy listening, schmaltzy garbage song that these boomers recognize and think it's fun to make fun up. And I'm sure it's good.

If you went to see Love Story in theaters, you also have heard of this song. It's just a corny song title joke then. Just saying like, I Am Woman, Hear Me Roar, that kind of easy reference. Yeah. Basically, yeah. Now, look, it's a mean joke,

but I like the sadness of describing having sex in a car while the kids are asleep. This whole thing smacks of a third act rewrite because it's like, well, how's it going to end? Oh, they bounce and slide in a bounce house down Niagara Falls. Okay, sure. Yes. It feels totally like an Al Jean demanded more action-packed third act ending because it feels like the more natural ending would be Lisa trying to explain herself.

And Homer cuts her off and she's like, you let me finish. sentence. Never. Because if she had finished her sentence, they could have talked through this problem. But then it wouldn't have been a big action-packed ending on Niagara Falls instead and in a silly bounce house. Yeah, it's very corny, but

what did you think of the very 2004 Canada versus U.S. jokes here too? It was fun. I do enjoy their insults. I really thought the U.S. calls Canada you puck slapping maple suckers because both the Canadian and U.S. Coast Guards are trying to compete to go after

margin homer and this is something you can't say out loud sincerely but i like how canada calls the u.s you shatner stealing mexico touchers that is a canadian joke i had not heard before one being mad that out of all of the canadian celebrities who are taken in by a america shatner's the one they bring up but also canada as being somewhat racist of calling them like touching mexico yeah you so yes i don't agree with the sentiment behind it but it is funny and this is also i guess I've never been to Niagara Falls, but it shares a border. It is like a border. It's, you can be on both sides of the border for this, the tourist trap.

Sure. I've never been there either. Very far away from me in Vancouver. I've seen it in movies and TV shows mainly. It looks like a fun thing, but I'm sure I'm ever in the, either Toronto-ish area or northern New York. Maybe I will check it out. If it's in Albany time for Steam Tams. What if the Fantastic Four has an event there?

And it's like, ride the thing boats. Well, okay, now you sold me on it. And eat the human torches spaghetti. You know, if they called it Ant Pitunia Spaghetti, I'm booking a flight right now. It's officially Antittunia Spaghetti. But so there's a quick jousting of the Coast Guard boats. Meanwhile, the bounce house falls over the falls with a corny joke of Homer saying, why they call this Niagara Falls?

I'm like, eh, you can get something a little better than this. Didn't care for that, no. But in the time it takes them to fall over the falls, Homer and Marge have undressed the entire time and then have had the best sex of their lives, apparently. Not to be too crude here, but Homer has ejaculated within the bounce house. See, I'm just stating it as cleanly as I can because when Marge emerges, she has a witty thing to say. When Homer emerges, he is clearly come drunk and has nothing to say. I'm using the right scientific terminology. But, you know, they're partially submerged, so hopefully Niagara Falls water has cleaned it out a little.

bit. It is an okay joke when they're thinking they're about to die and he says like, well, you know, when we're in heaven, maybe it'll always work there. But this is where a sexually satisfied ending comes in. Back off, Canadians. We got them. You back off, hosers. They're in Canadian

waters, eh? Feed it, you puck slapping, maple suckers. Take a hike, you Shatner, stealing Mexico touchers. Uh? Oh, large, I guess we'll just have to make love in heaven. I bet it always works up there. Shut up and kiss me, you doomed, Hank.

Uh... Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Moonbelt! Is anyone alive?

More alive than any of you, squares! Oh, uh... Yeah, uh... Oh, you're on my hair. Oh, that's better. Well, it looks like everything worked out just fine for everybody. All right. Credit card bill seems a little chunky this month.

Let's see what's going on visa vizza vizza. This? A! A! again, this is like just the ugliness of the time, and I don't want to seem like a prude. I don't like hearing Marge and Homer actively having sex. I don't like when they're in something

that lets me sense the thrusting. The way the bounce house is moving, we could see this, well, Homer is actively thrusting into Marge at this point. I mean, I'm just describing it in as plain of terms as I can, but I don't like seeing this. I don't get, I mean, I know it's funny when they can snuggle off screen and have their little husband my fun together, but don't show it to me.

Because maybe I think of Homer and Mark, Marge's like my parents or something. I don't know, but it feels like you're crossing a line there. You know, and Homer says, you're on my hair. That makes me think that, you know, maybe Homer's underneath this time. He's the one. Marge, we're in Calgirl positions, perhaps. But also, like, hearing it there, it really feels like they just decided not to write a joke for Homer where he just was like, go. Like, he could say something there, you know. Yeah, yeah. Well, I guess the joke is like he is just incapacitated with lust. he has been waiting to bust for I guess a week here

I was trying to use the scientific language I'm sorry he's finally climaxed after a week I didn't even talk about the color of orbs here I could have so orbs I could have said blue balls oh got it got it I did have to say it there but that was just to say I wouldn't say it now how many episodes

end with Rod Flanders as your final shot probably no other one I would say I'd be so unless like just Rod, this has got to be it. Maybe like Rod, Ned, and Todd, maybe there's a few in there. But this is a weird ending. They really needed an out. This feels like a hasty rewrite, this bounce house catastrophe followed by a cut back to the Flanders house.

I can't believe it ends with Rod screaming is the end of the episode. They had to get away from Lisa and Bartso fast because Lisa is watching her parents have sex and is just like, well, a happy ending. Yes. Yeah, yeah. I forgot about that aspect. She's looking at them through the binoculars. Yeah, one of those like viewfinder thingies

When it just cut back to Ned and Rod reacting I feel like when you pitch that in the room It's like no, guys, we have to have a better out than this Rod finders, that's our ending But it feels like they're happy to just get to an ending I am too For whatever reason this episode took me so long to get through Like taking notes

I think it was like three or four hours I don't know why Because you have like so much time taken up by the Miami Vice segment and the Catch Me If You Can parody. Maybe it just felt like longer. Maybe I was just procrastinating because I didn't want to see more of it. Because I remember not liking this when it aired. If I remember when this aired,

I think the Catch Me If You Can thing made me go like, huh, that's a recent reference to do. And that's all I remembered about it. And then I think I was in not a great mood because I had just seen, you know, the week before or two weeks before would have been the Skinner and the breakup episode that did put me in a bad mood for reasons we talked about then. But then, you know, this was not

a great follow-up to it with just like all of this arguing, I think, was what put me in a bad mood then. I totally miss the Miami Vice stuff. I'm looking forward to more of season 15. We're in a rough patch right now, and I'm looking at the other episodes of not thinking, you know, I did enjoy these. I love when Marge

became an author. I like the R.R.D. Ziff's stuff. The I-Robot thing was pretty fun with good animation. So this has not been all Drek, but boy, like, negativity on this episode. And I'm sorry if we're projecting that on to you, but this made me so cranky. And the next episode we're covering is Burns's air. So it's like, it's going to be the worst of times and then the best of times on this podcast feed. I haven't watched ahead yet. I am hopeful in season 15 that John Vini can save us with Simple Simpson after this one. I'm really hopeful. Like,

that it's a John Vidi written script. I remember being all. right with it back in 2004. I haven't given it a full watch in a good while. And if we had a guest on this one, I feel like they would never come back. Is this all you guys do? Just whine? Only sometimes. Only sometimes. Yeah, only sometimes

when it's deserved. Yes. This episode deserves it. But thank you so much for listening and thank you for listening to two and a half hours of complaining. And if you want to hear more positive podcasts and get these episodes a week ahead of time and ad-free and then access to a ton of other bonus podcasts over 200 to date,

go to patreon.com slash talking simpsons and sign up for five bucks a month and when you do get the early podcast they'll be ad free you know if you don't want to hear ads it's the best way to not hear ads but also on top of that you get access to our vast catalog over eight years worth of mini series episodes to date we've covered the critic mission hill Batman the animated series king of the hill and that five dollar level also gets you new monthly episodes of both talking futurama and talking of the hill that is only for five bucks a month only at patreon.com slash Talking Simpsons, and there is a $10 level two that gets you all the $5 stuff naturally, but also one immensely huge podcast once a month, only for patrons of that level. What is that, Henry? Bob's talking about the What a Cartoon Movie Podcast, where we work very hard to talk about an animated feature film as in depth as we do a boring episode of the Simpsons, a lesser episode of the Simpsons, and we are deep in our summer of the 2000s Disney films. We started it with an extremely goofy movie.

continued with Lilo and Stitch. Just a couple of weeks ago, we covered Atlantis, and at the end of the month, we are going to be covering Treasure Planet to wrap it all up. And that's just the most recent stuff of us covering for almost four, five, or even six hours in animated feature film. We've done the entire Disney Renaissance of the 80s and 90s. We have done all of the Toy Story films.

We've done a bunch of Batman movies, Spider-Man into the Spider-Ver Spieves and Budhead films, tons of stuff, years and years of it that you can hear right there at Patreon.com, The Talking Simpsons also add free as well, and you get all the $5 things when you sign up at the $10 level for those very long and in-depth history-laden podcasts. Check it all out at patreon.com slash Talking Simpsons. And I've been one of your host, Bob Mac, you can find me on Blue Sky and Letterbox and other places as Bob Servo and my other podcast is Retronauts. That is a classic gaming podcast all about old video games.

You can find that wherever you find podcasts or go to patreon.com slash Retronauts and sign up there for two full-length bonus episodes. every month. And Henry, what about you? You can find me on Blue Sky as Talking Henry, and I'm also that on Instagram. And if you're following me and Bob there, or if you're still on Twitter as well, in all those places, at Talk Simpsons Pod is the official account of this podcast and the What a Cartoon podcast as well. You stay up to date whenever new stuff comes out on those on the free feed, on the Patreon. If we have a special, any other thing going on in our lives, you know what's going on.

if you follow at Talk Simpsons Pod. So please follow today. And don't forget to check out the official website, TalkingSimpsons.com, for a list of all of our previously released free podcasts. Thanks so much for listening, folks. To see you again next time for Season 5's Burns' Air, and we'll see you then.

Welcome to Lecture Number 8 on the water balloon. Yesterday I asked everyone to think of other liquids you could fill a balloon with. Water? Oh! Thank you, Nelson. Anyone else? Hot sauce? Kearney, that could blind someone.

You get an A. Now, for practical demonstration. First, we load the ordinance. Then, select the target. Hmm, not auto. He'd drive us off a cliff. Of a cliff? That would solve everything.