Talking Simpsons - Talking Simpsons - Colonel Homer

Episode Date: August 3, 2016

Homer just wants to help a struggling country music star, but Marge is worried she’s losing her husband. Plus Big Shirtless Ron all on this week’s podcast…

today's talking Simpsons is brought to you by bombas premium socks talking Simpsons listeners can go to get bombas calm slash laser timing get 20% off your first order ahoy hoy everybody and welcome to talking simpsons where we're as smart as we are handsome uh take that as you will this is the laser time podcast network's chronological exploration of the simpsons. I am your host, Big Shirtless Bob.

Who else is here today with me? Look who's oinking, Henry Gilbert. That's good. And who else do we have? Yahoo, it's Chris Anteese. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Chris Anteese, everybody.

Hi! Are you part of the recovering alcoholic drug ban? He drinks as he takes a sip? No. Good old Yahoo. So today's episode is colonel homer and it aired on march 26 1992 chris what happened on this mythical day in simpsons history holy fucking shit babby uh peter griffin's here stone phillips makes his debut as an nbc anchor basic instinct pulls in quite a spread at the box office later parody on on The Simpsons. Bananas are $1 a pound,

and most importantly for our purposes, Garth Brooks' Rope It In The Wind, which was the first country album to ever debut at number one, goes on to sell 14 million copies, which, as I exit my cheesy newscaster voice, should show you why this was a topic of an episode, a believable one.

Yeah, though I don't think they planned it around a resurgence in country. It just kind of happened. This is Garth Brooks' third album. And I had a year or two period of liking country while trying to fit in and pretend to like sports. So I remember very specifically this period. Country was huge and the only real thing

I have to know to tell me that I was there and I was right is the episode of Pinky and the Brain where he poses his bubba boba brain because that is the new big thing I think what it's why we have

Miley Cyrus because of Billy Billy Ray Cyrus what Garth Brooks did I think was make country into something much poppier

where country songs used to be like oh my truck went off the cliff my dog died my wife left me like shitty sad like pretty much

bad rap sung horribly over an acoustic guitar. I think. I'm drinking at the keg and fucking shit up. I swear, when I hear country, that's what they talk about now. America and I love this guy. Every country song is an anthem about being a dirtbag. Like, we're going to have some fun and drink bad beer. Yeah.

And this girl loves my overalls. And I love it. I love an old hick like with bad posture perched over an acoustic guitar like warbling a bunch of crap but when this is overproduced and you're like you're name-checking brands in your song like i know that i mean that's what garth brought into of like the character cowboy like that's i liked of old country what i like about old country music is that you know merle haggard or or or willie nelson all those types like they lived a life like yeah they were ugly men these broken down haggard men

singing about their real problems there's an expression of pain and desperation not just everybody boots scooting boogie it's either that or my little girls growing up and i'm kind of attracted to her well and also the i mean she she's known for her looks too but dolly parton had a lot of that tragedy and like sadness in her life for god i'm going to see her and we love her and i i love dolly parton so much i love her so much one of my favorite things she did recently the well when i say recently i mean 10 years ago she did an original song for trans america which which was such an ahead-of-its-time, ahead-of-the-curve thing about trans people in America. She wrote an original song for it that was... She successfully, in the song, compares someone transitioning into the gender expression they believe in.

She connects that to jesus dying on the cross wow she's like just like jesus on the cross i am transformed that's heavy it was like and progressive oh shug any chick with a dick you dollywood for free that's what i that's what i loved about her that she when she sang the song of the oscars that year she's like well from dollywood to ho to Hollywood how about this and that she I love about her that she is a very devout Christian but she also is like

I'll have fun and I can she can fit in progressive values with her Christianity one of my favorite stories about her too this Dolly part has little to do with this episode but it was when she hosted Saturday Night Live, she told the writers, like, I will do any joke you want except Jesus.

Like, just don't make fun of the church. I'll do any joke. And she did. Like, they said she was game for anything. I grew up with a naked picture of Dolly Parton taped inside a trunk where I hid my candy. Was she naked? I grew up in the South. You know, I tried looking it up.

This was pre-internet. This was ripped out of a magazine. So either it was a very accurate facsimile, because I bought a ripped picture from a magazine of a picture of tits. A black market. For like five bucks in middle school.

We grew up in a big hick town. We weren't really going through puberty yet. All we knew was that the bigger the breast, the better the woman. So Dolly Parton was the end-all, be-all for a little hick town so like and all we weren't really going through puberty yet all we knew is that the bigger the breast the better the woman so dolly parton was the end all be all for a little hick town so i had dolly on my mind because there's a little bit of her in lurling lumpkin though more patsy klein and so the background of this episode uh is that it is the only episode where the sole credited writer is back right that's crazy. And I think it's the second and last one where he is credited as a writer, unless he somehow came back. He wrote like four. Technically, he is a credit writer on 22 short films about Springfield.

And I think he did a Treehouse of Horror. No, that was before this. So he kind of just fell back on it. Well, I mean, i will not proclaim to know everything about those writing rooms but you generally have a bunch of people throwing out ideas putting them down on paper and one person goes off to structure that into an episode and that is the credited writer i mean he might have you know what we know about now the dynamics when you hear them talk is like oh that's a fucking meyer joke even though his name is not on

the he's not he doesn't have a. I feel like someone submits a first draft and then it's punched up into an episode. And that's definitely what this feels like. It feels like there's a lot of punching up here. We do it with our dumbass podcasts. We always, like, one person needs to own this if we're doing this many. Yeah, it's just like that.

But also, knowing what we know about the dynamics between Sam Simon and Matt Groening, I wonder if he was doing it to be like, I can write one of these. Oh, you big-time writers, I'll show you. Was Sam Simon gone Mac Grady. I wonder if he was doing it to be like, I can write one of these. Oh, you big time writers, I'll show you. Was Sam Simon gone at this point? No, no, no. Season three, he was still, he leaves during it.

Yeah, I think so. You're right. Yeah, but this is towards the end. But he was there for it. That would explain it though, if he was writing it with Sam Simon and he booked. But this episode is a parody of, to an extent, of Coal Miner's Daughter, a film

about Patsy Cline, which is why they hired Beverly D'Angelo, who played her in the film. Oh, she did. I am so embarrassed about this. Was this his basic? No, you're thinking of a different movie. Well, no, she's in it. Beverly D'Angelo's in it, Coal Miner's Daughter, and that she... I didn't know she was a musician.

I knew her as the vacation mom. I grew up as the vacation mom. I grew up in the 80s. She's vacation mom to me. It took me a while to Google it. This is her singing voice, right? And she wrote some of the songs. She wrote two of the songs. She wrote Bag Me a Homer and Your Wife Don't Understand You.

Bunk With Me Tonight's my favorite one. It's not on any CD and it's always made me mad. But this episode starts at a movie theater with The Simpsons. The first appearance of the Googleplex? Yeah. So what are we going to see? Ernest cuts the cheese. Honey, I hit a school bus.

Look who's oinking. Look who's oinking. That is such a wonderful mirror into what was coming out of theaters at that time. I think they predicted, look who's talking now, because they're implying there's going to be pigs talking in this next one.

Oh, see, I wondered if that was... Wow, I always read that as like a Porky's parody. Oh, okay. No, you're right. It is totally Lucas talking. Look Who's Talking, Honey, I Trunk the Kids, and Ernest, and the other movies on the Googleplex. I'm I'll Fry Your Face 3,

The Smell in Room 19, Space Mutant 6, The Stockholm Affair, which they go and see in Ernest versus the Pope. Yeah, Bart says Ernest cuts the cheese, but the movie is Ernest versus the Pope. I thought that was hysterical because at the time, I unironically loved earnest movies and if you

made a movie about him farting i would camp out inside the theater what if he farted i i love that opening it's full of great observational stuff of like this is what going to the movies is like and the stockholm affair is what like a sort of a tom clancy thriller like in the they make it look very hot for october towards the end at least me Ted Kallik or whatever that guy's name is. Jim Kallik. Like the parking in the compact space. That to me, I always think of it when I see a compact space.

Like, I think I have a minor anxiety about it. When I, when I drove around, I was like, I can't park there. I'll, I'll,

my car will be trapped. I never knew what a compact car was again from the South. And then I moved to San Francisco, and it's like, if you need to have a compact car to live here. To park anywhere. I mean, a compact car is almost too big. To see an SUV is very rare. Yeah, or a boat of a car. You need to buy a small

disposable car, because you will lose those windows, you will get your car, will be shit on. All that's resistant. I do think this is one of the final appearances of space mutants like they just stopped i think they stopped thinking like space mutants isn't funny they barely show it yeah it's not only that it wasn't funny because i do love the space mutants don't get me wrong but like that was probably more evocative of the writers of the first season's childhood than an accurate depiction we were not watching monster movies

and yeah they really don't make a lot of great jokes with this Space Mutants idea. I mean, the one with her in Australia is funny, but I think that's basically the most they get out of it. Even though the first NES game was based on the idea of Space Mutants. I did love Bart's line, if you don't watch the violence, you'll never get desensitized

to it. That's true. I do like the outburst Marge has at Homer during the film. I think that guy's a spy. Well, of course he's a spy. You just saw him go through spy school. Oh, wait! I heard how this ends. It turns out the secret code was the same nursery rhyme

he told his daughter. Hey, it's pretty obvious if you think about it. Oh, shut up, Homer! No one wants to hear what you think! Yeah! That is crazy. I do love, it's a treat for me when I'm in a theater and the entire theater applauds a bad person being asked to go.

I worked in a movie theater for four years, and so I've been on both sides of it. And when you see some loud jerk asked to leave or told to shut up by the rest of the theater and everyone applauds like oh it's a beautiful moment though it also you know heightens the situation it makes things even more tense but it is a nice cathartic moment i like a whole audience laughing i really sympathize with marge because i have had friends that would be the chatty person in the theater and it's's hard to yell at them without making a situation,

but at the same time, you feel like you're part of it, and people are also looking at you, and you're just like, God, shut up. I've been both, and I have also been on the receiving end of a public dressing down by my significant other. Well, I mean, I just don't— Shut up, Chris! I thrive on not behaving well. It's just I don't blame anybody else.

But I know how much it hurts to be scolded in public like that. I mean, yeah. I just can't feel too bad for Homer because he was being so obscenely rude at this thing. And people were trying to tell him, like, shut up, Homer. That's what happens

when you get in long-term relationships. You get too comfortable. You're not considered enough about how you're making someone else look in public. That's true. And as an animation geek, I did love that when she gets hit, when Homer does get hit with the drink, more of it does splash on Marge.

So when he says the... No, I don't have it. When she says most of the stuff they threw at you got me, it really did happen. But just watching, this is one of those episodes, watching it as an adult, it does make a lot more sense to me. I would probably get mad, storm out, go away for an evening, come back and apologize. He leaves for a long time. He does.

I guess I'll get to that. Homie, aren't you coming inside? Marge, I have always carried myself with a certain quiet dignity. Tonight, you robbed me of it. I'm going now, and I don't know when you'll see me again. Wow. Homer is so in the wrong here. I was having problems, you know, trying to feel good about what Homer's

doing throughout, even though it leads to some great jokes. I feel like I'm leaving my family because I made a scene, and you don't know where I'm going, and I might not be back. And I'll take the one car when I have to. Do people have male tantrums like that, where you just run away for like an hour?

Maybe go to the other room. Not like, I'm leaving town. I won't be back till the morning. I usually just go see a movie or something like that. I guess I've done that, but I wouldn't be gone all night long. Though, we are thinking about this now. They didn't have cell phones. So when Homer's gone, you don't know where he is. You can't text him.

You couldn't text him in two hours later like still with still mad still mad like that's true no way to check in are you ready to talk bay hashtag some kind of emojis thrown in there i love the stuff with flaming peets that was fun like just the and that's why he gets so far away from town too that he's he's chasing flaming peets and then he just keeps driving. The stuff with the smells, it's not good audio, but him just being all the different stenches.

I swear they spend two minutes with Homer in the car with no dialogue, just him driving past things. That actually, that entire stretch of highway that has nothing but bad smells is like when you drive from Southern California to Northern California, there is a stretch of highway like that that's just nothing but cows. So you're just smelling manure

for maybe 20 to 30 minutes. Yeah, we would have to drive through Jessup, Georgia. They had one good thing, a Hardee's. The rest of it was like a paper mill and just miles of stench. Yeah, I do miss Hardee's. You know, Carl's Jr. is not the same. It's not the same.

They have a California burger and I always look into stupid burger innovations. Like, what the same. It's not as classy. They have a California burger, and I always look into stupid burger innovations. Like, what is this? It's the In-N-Out burger. That's what they've ripped off, and they put in Hardee's all over the country. F you, Carl's.

Why are we talking about this? You know what we shouldn't be talking about? Because I have this next to my house. We don't sell duff. We sell fud. Okay, fud me. Fud me. There is a stupid awful terrible

local grocery store that's the closest to us so we occasionally have to go buy bad produce there they have one kind of bacon it is FUD

it is FUD bacon every time I go in and take a picture I'm like boy I'm gonna tweet about this it's gonna be great then I forget

and post like 18 other things did it blind any hillbillies that's my question they are so mean to southerners in this one like they are it's to such a cartoonist extent uh the first it's spittle county uh they

immediately cross the line and you're in deliverance and then the the at the honky talk like that's my line of the show hey let's fight there oh you got it words no no of course i don't have it hey let's fight them's fighting words um i just they even throw a pig on stage in anger when they throw chairs they also throw a yodeler yeah almost everything that happens homer in the third act i think is like some of the best lines the show has ever had and then good for graining if he's responsible for those it shows whether he's a real genius but so he meets the singing waitress work all day for some old man sweat and break your back yeah then you go home to your castle but your queen won't cut your slack that's true that's why you're losing all your hair that's why you're overweight that's why you flip your pickup truck right off the interstate. That's right.

Except for the pickup truck. There's a lot of bull that hands you. There's nothing you can do. Your wife don't understand you, but I do. Yep. Yeah. I don't understand you, but I do. Yep. I don't understand you, but I do. Beverly D'Angelo is so good. Speaking as a red-blooded American male,

I think this is the most attractive female Simpsons character ever created. It's her voice. Beverly D'Angelo, I'm sure she looks age-appropriate now, but she not only sounded, but looked like... Why wasn't she Jessica Rabbit? That's true. She even looked like that.

She looked like the perfect woman. Yeah, I think with... Up until like five years ago when she finally, oh guess what? She's 60. She's been 60 this whole time? No one told me. I think she just had twins with Al Pacino like a couple years ago. I'm not kidding. So do you think Lurleen is prettier than Mindy?

Yes. I think so. But I have a white trash fetish. Do you think Lurleen is prettier than Mindy? Ooh, yes. I think so. But I have a white trash fetish. I'm from Florida. I mean, I think she's drawn sexlier because she is more, throughout the episode she is drawn more openly like she's courting Homer. Yeah. Mindy and Homer end up together without wanting it.

Neither of them wants it, so she's not drawn as like sexually. Yeah, she's trying to be a little seductive. It also might have something to do with what you're attracted to, Henry, because basically Mindy is Homer. That's true. This is a sultry mix. No, I would say Lerlain is, I think Lerlain is prettier too. I think something that helps the

prettiness transfer over is that there's something cartoonish about her like her giant hair her but these things that are real bits of the south it's coming through with her it still works her shirt and everything yeah she is a stuck east pecan log

in a manure farm okay so that song from the beginning I think tells you Lernaline is into married guys like she wants this kind of from the beginning yeah and i we were talking before the show every song she writes is about homer sometimes explicitly like i am singing to you homer about you and your wife and me and how i want you to leave her and i want to have sex with you homer do you think there's a lot of country

songs like this i don't know a whole lot about this kind of country music but aren't there a lot of like wish fulfillment like i'll be there for you like how all those boy bands are like i'm singing to you the woman who's listening or the girl who's listening well there is the song i mean uh this brought me to thinking of of dolly parton i mean there's i don't believe it's a parton song but there's stand by your man which surely gets parodied later but oh yeah stand by your man which, which is more about how hard it is to be a woman. And Stand By Your Man is a stupid song. Well, I won't say that.

It's catchy, but it doesn't have a good message. The message in it is just like, can you believe this awful woman stole your man? I hate this woman. You should be kind of mad at your guy. You do not change horses in midstream. That's an Oregon Trail tip. But it also reminded me of there's a very good Drunk History by Casey Wilson where she tells the drunk history or she plays Dolly Parton in it.

She tells the drunk history behind Dolly Parton writing the song I Will Always Love You, which was more popularized by Whitney Houston, but it was a hit first with Dolly Parton. Listen to Dolly once. She's got an extra verse in it. She wrote it as a farewell song to her former songwriting and love life partner. Wow. And she was going solo. And she wrote that song as like, this is goodbye and I will always love you, but I'm leaving you too. My heart is breaking hearing this.

My heart will go on. And she also like, he got some of the songwriting rights to it too she gave it gifted it to him because he was down on his luck like watch that drunk history it's amazing it gave me a whole new level of appreciation for dolly but so anyway yeah i think that kind of autobiographical stuff that is totally what country is about whether it is a chanteuse or a chante I mean, it just revels in those cliches that help things go mainstream. They can be easily adapted to any situation.

And it's important to note that Homer is moved by this song not because of Lorleen's beauty, which he's oblivious to, which they kind of have to make him oblivious to to make him... They worked so hard to make him oblivious. I think this is one of the worst written lines in Simpsons history. So what's your name, stranger?

Homer J. Simpson. My name's Lurleen Lumpkin. That's a pretty name. You think so? Maybe. I'm not sure. And he says, I forgot it. I forgot it.

Kind of a clunker. Yeah, what the hell? That's way sub Simpsons. Yeah. Braining. Can't work on every line, I guess. I think that's where they're trying to just show how oblivious he is but he you look at the things around it like he's that oblivious to her clear

interest in him though i liked when he first introduced himself before the commercial break and she's like yeah she's obviously thinking you're the 800th guy tonight who will hit on me the pretty waitress just he's interested in the music, man. But the time cut shows he's there in the morning. So did he talk with her all night? How oblivious can he be? If you're talking to a beautiful waitress all night while you're a married man in a committed, monogamous relationship, you know, even Homer should know.

Just that time jump leaves a ton to wonder how far away is this place why is he ready to get Randy when he gets home that's something else how long has he been drinking is it just normal makeup sex or is it inspired by Lurleen but part of this episode I like now

that I didn't notice before like this entire motivation of Homer is that he's appreciating like art and he is so in love with this art she's making, he wants to help her spread it to everywhere. Because it's like an emotional side of Homer. Usually he's obsessed with TV and eating. But this is like, I love this song. I love your music. Let's show people how good you are.

And that's the side of Homer we don't see. They're in between there singing to a bowling ball. That's true. But I do. See? Homer's singing to his ball again. Yeah, and he's bowling at 280 again chris you're right uh letty and carl killed barney uh this could be barney oh henry said that

i was thinking about it because in the scene after this, Barney appears at the... It's actually a pretty cute scene where Mo finds out he's been cheated on by Homer going to... That's also where you find out that Fudd blinds hillbillies. But Barney just sits there and I was waiting like, and now Barney says something. Wow, Barney doesn't say anything. I'll always be here for you, Mo. I think he just says, when he when when mo says off from now on all the drinks are free for tonight or the next hour when there's a song yeah yeah

he does say something later but the i i love that song i was listening to oldies a lot as a kid and so i just i knew that song the kind of hush again when we talk about simpsons writers nostalgia not being in tune with the times we were living in because i was very young here the song hasn't been recorded just i remember growing up watching cartoons with those booths where you'd go and sing a song and it would spit out a record i have never seen one of those in my entire life might have never and if there is let me go let me go cut that mighty number nine mambo number five parody that i did the other day that's worth it i mean speaking of things things that are not discussed but are inferred, Homer knows her address.

Like, he goes to where she lives, so he found out her address. So even though he's like, oh, I forgot your name, well, you know her address, Homer. You knew where to find her. And when you think about it, 1992, again, no internet, no phone. He had to write that down. Like, he at least has her phone number. Either of those is a level of intimacy.

I'm sure it happened in the five hours they were talking that we didn't see. Again, that's why, not to harp on that, but that she walks up to him in that scene as if they've never spoken before. So he's just been sitting there alone in the morning until they opened to talk to who i don't know a lot of that time jump i almost wish it wasn't there all you had to do is have a dark sky and this could be a naturally following scene now there's a ton of questions well it is in homer j simpson earlene i can't get your song out of my mind i haven't felt this way since funky town oh aren't you sweet do you think i could get a copy of it sorry darling all my songs are up here i'm basting a turkey with my tears don't look up my dress unless you mean it i'm sick of your lying lips and false teeth earlene we've got to crack open your head

and scoop out those songs i wish her reaction was more joking to that, but she's not stupid enough to know he doesn't mean that literally. But I thought it was like magic, them making it seem like it. The Simpsons will be right back. How we use electricity can be smarter, cleaner, and greener. We'll be right back. and much more. Making your usage clearer, your trips greener, your home cozier, and your world brighter. Find our net zero hub at electricireland.ie. Howdy, y'all.

Today we have a very countrified episode of our favorite show, The Simpsons. You want to know how you can avoid being a hayseed hick? I'll tell you what, a good pair of socks tell you what a good pair of socks yes a good pair of socks baby and that's because this show is brought to you by bombas bombas socks they have a sock for you that has been carefully created to improve on years of socks complacency in the industry it's i swear to god a better toe fit a better grip it feels lighter more comfortable bombas have spent two years in research and development in order to help bring you a better sock at a better price everything from advanced blister protection We'll be right back. And there's a 100% satisfaction guarantee should you have any problem. Bombas will send you new socks and offer you a full refund.

And yes, Talking Simpsons fans, you can get 20% off your first Bombas orders by going to getbombas.com slash lasertime. It is just that simple. Why not head to the website, poke around a bit, see if it's right for you, and we'll scamper on back to the show. You like Lasertime shows? Then you might like Bonus Time. We'll see you next time. song but her voice whenever that came out like 97 98 i'm like a teenager at six flags waiting in line for a roller coaster and that song plays and i see this woman who's probably in her like 30s not very attractive and she's crying as the song plays and i'm just like holy shit the like the world is unfair and this makes me so like sad but I'm like, I'm not going to kiss her. I'm 17, and she's not very attractive.

That's where this will cheer up. Sexual assault. So she's going through it. She's feeling it. But now I feel like if I was at a theme park alone in a line. And a song called Kiss Me. And Kiss Me came on, and I saw people in the theme park kissing each other while that song played. I might cry.

Get bonus time, Laser Time's weekly full-length, uncensored, and ad-free Patreon-exclusive podcast, as well as weekly full-length movie commentaries, wrestling and cartoon video commentaries, physical rewards, the first season of Talking Simpson, and more at patreon.com slash Lazer Time, starting at just five bucks. You'll help us live, and we'll do our best to help you never be bored again. But her being discovered that way, it almost feels like a pre-parody of Walk the Line, the Johnny Cash thing, they parody it so well in Walk Hard of just the guy saying, you better play your one song at this radio thing, but I don't think you can play a single note that'll make me be impressed by your music. I love that movie. And then he immediately reacts like, that's the greatest song ever.

Can we celebrate that movie forever? Because those movies are still being made and so stupid. Rediscover Walk Hard, people. It's such a great movie. John C. Reilly's so good. I think I kind of want it. It gets played on CUD radio, which I love the CUD. You got CUD on it.

The CUD shots are, I swear, they just drew a barn around the KBBL establishing shot. But Marge is not happy about any of this. She's wonderful. I could feel her sweet country soul in every digitally encoded bit. Country music sucks. All it does is take precious airspace away from shock DJs whose cruelty and profanity amuse us all. Shut up, boy.

Marge, what do you think? Well, it's nice. But who is this woman? Well, right now, she's an out-of-work cocktail waitress, but she's going to be a country music superstar like, uh, that jerk in the cowboy hat and that dead lady. I don't like you hanging around some cocktail waitress. Marge, you make it sound so seamy.

All I did was spend the afternoon in her trailer watching her try on some outfits. Ooh. I never really thought about that, but how little Homer is motivated by attraction to... He's a marg... A margifile? Yeah, a margisexual.

He never cares about anybody. But in other episodes, it has been implied he has a sexual appetite. You're right., it has been implied he has sexual appetites. You're right. That's why it was odd in the Maude episode. Oh, the one in the bar. Oh, yeah. Well, he was wasted, too.

So maybe his demons come out then. Well, he was drunk at that bar, though. Oh, true. Proclaiming he wants nothing in exchange. Don't thank me, Lurleen. You should be thanking your brain. Oh, Homer. No man has ever been this nice to me without you know wanting something

in return well i was gonna ask you for a glass of water but now i feel kind of guilty about it you're just a big sack of sugar thanks you did say sugar right such a good joke i love that joke that that again I mentioned it in the Homer at the Bat episode, and it's the same deal here. They said on the commentary that that joke the Fox censors hated and barely allowed on it, and then it was central in the commercials for the episode. That's why this joke doesn't really work on me anymore, because I saw those commercials so much, watching like nine hours of TV a day in 1992. Finally, the country episode, little me said.

Woo-hoo. Well, and also on the DVD, they don't have deleted scenes for this episode, but they do have one of the commercials that has a deleted scene in the commercial. It's on the DVD. Should I tell what the cut scene is? It's two lines. It's there in the recording studio. Lisa says, I never thought I'd see another woman in Dad's life.

And Bart says, what are you talking about? There's Sarah Lee, Aunt Jemima, Betty Crocker. So they did not keep the cut scenes until, I think, season five. Because those are the DVDs that actually start featuring cut scenes. And we're going to get into those when we hit those episodes. Because there's so many good jokes. It's like a threat. They could have become the Simpsons jokes that we know.

That's what, like, in another timeline, we could be saying these different jokes. And we would know these different jokes uh and speaking of quick jokes i loved like it was almost too savage but it was it felt like such a hollywood babble on moment of crusty like slapping mel like told you to stay away from my sister idea that sideshow mel fuck somebody's sister should be should be the funniest thing in the whole episode. And Krusty's sister never heard from again, doesn't exist. The bone stays human. Just let go. Aunt Bella.

And also, I have come to really like the way Stank says, It's payback time. It's about to smash him in the face. Marge does eventually ask Homer to stop seeing Marlene. Are you having an affair with this woman? No. Have you kissed her? No. Has she kissed you? A couple of times. I want you to stop seeing Marlene. Are you having an affair with this woman? No. Have you kissed her? No.

Has she kissed you? A couple of times. I want you to stop seeing her. I can't. I'm her manager. Her manager? That's ridiculous. I won't allow you to spend any more time away from your family.

Marge, you're standing in the way of my boyhood dream of managing a beautiful country singer. Your boyhood dream was to eat the world's biggest hoagie, and you did it at the county fair last year, remember? Marge, Laurel Lane's going to be a big success, and whether you like it or not, I'm going to be there. Fine. See if I care. That is their first your boyhood dream was to be a whatever. And they had the previous one of like, don't you remember?

We went to the gorge, or we went to that car shaped like a bowling ball. Like, they definitely had jokes before of like, don't you remember this? And here's a photo. But this was the boyhood dream one. They'd later do it like, your boyhood dream was to run onto the baseball field. And you did it, remember? Yeah, you ruined his game. Yeah.

And at this point, Homer is now Colonel Homer dressed in the colonel suit. A parody of Elvis's manager, I believe, who eventually killed him with illegal drugs. Colonel Parker, his very controlling manager slash best friend. And yeah, that is also something to remember about Elvis, that he apparently never took an illegal drug in his life, but he took prescription drugs. Like, he hated drugs, but all these pills great how many celebrities are killed by their their you know opportunistic doctors that are just like i'll get you anything jackson he's ledger prince maybe prince maybe prince uh shit sounds like a good feature to me we'll look for a look i look forward to a morbid listicle we don't have a death jingle for this episode so i

need to mention some but so Marge is really hurt here, and then Homer, like... This might be my line of the show. I do love it. Everything Homer says in that costume... That's the joke. Hey, Colonel Homer. And you must be... Mrs. Homer Simpson.

Charmed. Thought you said she was overweight. Marge, it takes two to lie, one to lie and one to listen. What does that mean? Yeah. Poor Marge. Yeah, but this is a great performance here from Julie Cadner. No, she's realistically angry. Yes.

In the last clip we showed, I don't know. I'm liking Marge. Even though you're bummed for Marge, she's at least giving a great performance. She's clearly hurt. And I think Homer could have had a better argument if he said, this will make us lots of money. Like, she's getting popular. I'll get a piece of that. So what Bob said, he's not motivated by that.

He just loves the song that much. She's just a friend. And again, how oblivious he is to the vagina being thrown in his face. Bunk with me tonight. Oh, that's hot. There isn't a man alive who wouldn't get turned on by that. Well, goodbye. That's my favorite song in this episode, by the way.

Bunk with me. The repetition of bunk with me makes it really funny. And then she slows it down and starts singing it to him. And she's sexy as shit. The previous song is like, these are all about Homer now. Bagged me a Homer. Bagged me a Homer. Definitely like, I'm going to get your man.

Or I've gotten your man, really. I love the animation. It's basically a mini music video. And then they fill in Bart as being such an annoying kid in both of his shots. And then Lisa got to play on the song. I like that little saxophone part in that song. And the writers say it's kind of like an opera in that so much of the story is told through song. I think that's true.

I think there's like five minutes worth of songs in this episode, maybe four. Also, it still made me cringe now. Hearing teeth scratch against teeth like, I hate it. I hate it. Poor Marge. Homer really should know how much it hurts her.

Again, as an adult, this is like a little bit again as an adult these scenes become a little more traumatizing the idea that mom's going marge is going to dress the kids in their sunday best to show homer what it was like they knew they knew they were being used to be like please don't cheat on your family dress up and show your father and that there's a scene in world according to garp we watched that recently it's just like that but anyway here's a clip just so you know while you and lurley were out judging that grease pig contest maggie cut her first tooth that's great honey say have you seen my rattlesnake headband you're not even listening to me sure they will kids will you come in here you've got

a wonderful family homer please don't forget it when you walk out that door tonight That seems like the first inkling of Homer that there could be something wrong. I think he's only realizing it in this Act 3. Yeah, I think he's... Well, I mean, the bunk with me tonight was finally when he got it and that was a connected bookend that he might have missed is when he gets hit on by lorraine he runs away and says i gotta go yeah marge is then confronting him with please don't leave your family yeah i gotta go same deal like he's reacting to both he doesn't it's implied he almost doesn't know what he wants i I think he might be a little in denial. Like, he wants this dream to come true for Lurleen, but it's also at the cost of his family.

Yeah, and I did love, it's a little thing, but the way Patty is on the phone and she's like, oh, you got that one? I do, yeah. All our money's tied up in this woman. If she fails, we're broke. If she succeeds, I have no husband. I don't know what to root for. don't i just love it you don't you know i swear i've said that in real life and and then comes to a parody that makes no sense to kids today this is nuts yeah hold on to your pitchforks everybody everybody. It's time again for... Starring in alphabetical order,

Yodelin Zeke, Butterball Jackson, Reddiboy and Yuma, Cloris Moselle, Big Shirtless Rod, Orville and Hurley, Kathy May, Pip Diddler,

Rooney, the Yahoo! Recovering Alcoholic Jug Band, and tonight in her syndicated TV debut, Lurleen! God, okay, so the best... Yahoo! Recovering Alcoholic Jug Band. And tonight in her syndicated TV debut, Lurleen. God, okay, so the best... This is an amazing hee-haw parody. Yes. The best hee-haw parody is Horse Apples from Wonder Shows. Wonder Shows and Horse Apples is the greatest.

This is a very good one. Yeah, not as savage, but it still works. The huge bummer slash fucking societal relief is that no one will ever get any of those again. But if you were a kid like me in the South growing up without cable, Hee Haw was on every seven seconds. And Hee Haw is a show that started in the 60s

and was a syndicated television show that continued into the 90s. Technically at the time, it had been on longer than Saturday Night Live. And it was on all the 90s. Technically, at the time, it had been on longer than Saturday Night Live. And it was on all the fucking time. And I didn't like anything that wasn't a cartoon anyway. But Hee Haw had a cartoon!

It had like two seconds of a cartoon. It was infuriating! So you'll never know that burden of having to watch Hee Haw. It sucked. The show is just like the parody in that there are these

ten-second comedy sketches and then a man very sincerely introduces a musical guest. You know what, kids? You will know what Hee Haw is if you know the Family Guy joke and Ladies and Gentlemen Conway Twitty. Those are all clips from Hee Haw. One of the laziest jokes in that lazy-ass show's lazy history.

It makes me laugh almost every time, depending on how high I am, and especially when they're like the two or three times, are they really going to let the song go all the way through? Then they don't have to animate shit or write words or do jokes. We're all part of this meta Andy Kaufman joke and we get to sit there and enjoy it. They did it more than once I think.

All the time and it just gets longer every single time. It gets more elaborate. I haven't seen that far. I will say that Hee Haw is not something I'd ever want to watch. Not funny. But I miss the age of variety shows. It introduced probably a lot.

It became a platform for a lot of musicians who wouldn't have gotten it otherwise. Country musicians who didn't have Tonight Show spots and weren't getting on regular channels. Again, this will date all of us. Actually, just me. But there's another thing called the Grand Ole Opry, which is like a classier hee-haw, I think. It was like the Prairie Home Companion version of hee-haw. Which is a parody of something like hee-haw, maybe. But my favorite of the names is Hip Diddler.

That's my favorite. Actually, this has my line of the show. I don't think you have it in your clips, Chris. Homer's saying, they don't call me Colonel Homer because I'm some dumbass army guy. Yes, they do. It's me talking to the Rebel Yell Rep. Excuse me, are you Colonel Homer Simpson? Yes, I am.

I'm from Rebel Yell Records, a division of Tokusagi Corporation. I'm interested in buying Lurleen's contract. Forget it, pal. They don't call me Colonel Homer because I'm some dumbass army guy. So why not, probably? I just, I don't know why. That's the joke. It's so mean to the military.

Rebel Yell Records, a property of the Togasaki. That's great. What people don't remember, well, you probably don't remember from that era. I mean, like home video was becoming big, but a few studios were embracing it very well. Disney being one of them and Universal being another one. And that was all brought to you by MCA Universal,

a momentary acquisition of everything we had. America had by Japanese corporations. The only one that still holds on really is uh sony and columbia and then i really hate you see a ghostbusters trailer and oh there's so many things i hate just kidding uh but they i refuse to watch it they do both sony and columbia and like why are you sliding sony in here like we know you own Columbia. Sony didn't have anything to do with it. They should just change Columbia to Sony. To Sony if you need this logo here. A Sony company, yeah, something like that.

Which it says under the Columbia logo. God, that's redundant. But that was the joke you won't get now, is that at the time it was kind of nuts. A bunch of Japanese corporations were buying a ton of record companies and a ton of media companies. I also did did love lurleen's joke about fiberglass hey like it's like stabbing her the animators really draw her sexily in this bit like they were they were clearly very excited to draw a sexy more than a few like good butt shots of lurleen that i noticed this

time when she walks into meeting march for the the first time, it's just like swing, swing. Maybe that'll be our season three of the hottest Simpsons character ever. And I'm really going to put Lurleen way up there. I want that recorded and I want people to hear me talking about it. Exactly. I'm not ashamed. So when Homer has his flashback to all his entire love life, seemingly, it kind of tells me the same thing i thought about marge from the way we was which is marge seems to have only had one sexual partner her entire life homer and based on

that thing homer didn't seem to ever get laid before meeting margin his senior year in high school either so are they the only people they've ever had sex with and at that point it really feels like really thought that was a mathematic equation to marrying someone you met in high school. I guess so but that almost makes it feel like just have an open marriage or something or just say like yeah just fuck this person. Have some

experience outside of me. Spoken like a true gay man. Can you listen to this horseshit? Spoken like a millennial. I don't know. I guess I am more on the side of polyamory these days, but I just think like, eh. How about you deliver the case to my lady? Let's see how she treats it. I'd say monogamy seems very

outdated, especially when it's just like, eh. I don't know. It's like a handshake. I'm signing off on that by winking to you. It was funny, too, that Homer had to be like, oh, you would have gone all the way with me, too, right? Oh, yeah. Lurleen goes after him. I'm sorry, Lurleen.

All I wanted to do was share your beautiful voice with other people, and I've done that. Now I better get out of here before I lose my family. Just so I don't wonder, you would have gone all the way with me, wouldn't you? Uh-huh. Okay. That's a weird clarification there that she seemed to be so down with casual sex to this point that i guess it's the joke is homer so stupid he needs that

maybe she thinks maybe this he will come back to me if i let him know yes i will have sex with you homer it's pretty clear in the beginning like it wasn't well i'm gonna leave my marriage for a makeout session tonight with the promise of third base later. I think Homer knows you're getting, you're having sex. This is a sexual encounter. I was only bummed out by that they make numerous references that they're sinking their life savings into Lurlean's career. He's like, I'm desperate to offload her.

I'll give you 50 bucks. So either you lost a shitload of money or your life savings was $50. I don't know which one I want to root for. My headcanon for that is that they made in the montage, they made back the money. They still sold all those records. They were

packaging those records and they sold them. I feel good. There is a back-end deal. I need to update the wiki for this. Maybe it got them just back to zero. We have Lurleen's last song, Stand By Your Manager. She writes backstage, I guess, before a performance. And Homer makes it home. And by the way, live television loves it when you spring a song on them.

Just ask Lorne Michaels. You'll always be invited back. And they must be filming Yahoo 15 minutes from the Simpsons home because he gets there in time for it to air live. Unless it was on tape delay, maybe. This is the most explicit song because she name drops Homer and Marge in the song

dropped by the point yeah yeah and i did love oh in the flashback thing too i love that nancy got to play a woman for once and she's like thanks for dinner oh right like she that was such a great like that's nancy the woman there it felt so natural for just like oh a sarcastic yeah kind of masculine voiced i think that's that's her real voice though yeah i'm putting on a voice for dinner so i i like this episode i don't think they're it's super funny and uh but i still really enjoyed it my one problem is like we don't see a lot of lurleen outside of her being horny for homer like that's her only identity really and upon watching this as an adult, I'm like, I wish there was something more to Lurleen than just

that's all she is. Just a temptation. Yeah, I mean, she is a great songwriter. A great singer-songwriter. But they barely... They're just like, it's like a talent or something. Whatever. But you're really interested in Homer. And then also that Marge is watching Yahoo

naked. And that she doesn't know Homer's coming back to have sex with her. That's another Mark Kirkland trait. in Homer and then also that Marge is watching Yahoo naked and that she doesn't know Homer's coming back to have sex that's another Mark Kirkland trait he directed this episode it helps for the episode to end with them both nude in bed about to do it and so at least then you just get to watch Homer undress in such

a horrifying way out of his colonel costume I actually love that so Lor Lurling does come back in Marge vs. the Monorail next year. I spent last night in a ditch. And then she comes back in season 15, 16, 17. I looked it up. Season 19! I did watch this one when it aired and I remember not liking it

because I did watch this one right before Lurling's coming back and I was still let down. No, I had not watched it. I just read the wiki on it. But it was... Pretty much they reveal that the previous cameo appearances of her don't really count, but that she had gone on hit the skids after Homer wasn't managing her anymore. Her father, she owed a ton of back taxes and her father was taking advantage of her, too. Then she is able to get back on her feet. They shove in a bullshit appearance by the dixie

chicks in the episode oh jesus and then it seems that mar and then homer even dresses up as colonel homer again to get to with marge and they help her get back on her feet and then marge is it seems to imply marge is forgiven her and then the parting joke is marge saying if you ever come near my husband again i will choke you to death Jesus Christ and so what a classic episode we'll get to that one in probably 2023 I'm guessing if we're all still alive and still doing podcasts if podcasts

even exist anymore who knows I think Marge was a little my opinion is Marge was slightly too forgiving but and I also thought it was Homer is full on making out with her in that after her after his dream sequence. I'd like to think that all happened in the middle. He absentmindedly did it.

I'd like to think it was a split second. He wasn't going for it. She kind of lunged at him. I mean, Marge definitely went closer to infidelity with Jacques. Now that hurts that you don't do. It was more like premeditated, I would say. And she knew what she was doing. She knew what that brunch was

and he told her, hey, will you come have sex with me next week? Oh, I will. Tell all my girlfriends, fuck whoever you want, just don't tell me you're better to fall in love. Why is it so hard? I do it all the time.

But this is, yeah, not the most hilarious episode we've seen in season three, but a well animated one with a lot of great songs. Beverly D'Angelo's won their best guests ever, I think. Yeah, her voice really fit the character and about how she looks and how she acts. And Yahoo, if in a world where horse apples didn't exist, this would be the best parody of Hee Haw. And there's maybe like two hours worth of horse apples,'t exist, this would be the best parody of Hee Haw. And there's maybe like two hours worth of horse apples, I think, on that DVD. Oh, my God.

For Wonder Shows and Watch It, season two, especially with the horse apples. Horror horse apples. All your favorite alt comedians playing hillbillies. We were watching the Deep Breath joke zoom montage yes YouTube it is hypnotic it's hypnotic it kind of makes me nauseous after a while just all the zoom ins yeah so yes that has been our exploration of Wonder Shows and I guess

and the Simpsons obviously and Wonder Shows would have been a much better show to do this with yes we'd have done we'd be done in 16 episodes so few I've been your host Bob Mackey stammering for no reason I'm just thinking i'm thinking about lurley lumpkin i'm so oh she's great and you can find me on twitter as bob servo i also host the classic gaming podcast retronauts you can find that at retronauts.com or usgamer.net every monday and i also write for somethingawful.com uh guys where can we find you and what do you do well first i want to uh say

bob i really do love you something awfulful stuff. Oh, thank you. One of my favorite visual gags you did recently was a parody of people refusing to review Ghostbusters. And you took the Ghostbusters logo and then put the circle cross over that logo to say no to Ghostbusters. It was so brilliant. Behind the scenes, I thought of that joke and I had to write an article to justify it. That's how comedy works. It happens to me all the time. But hey, I'm H-E-N-E-R-E-Y-G on Twitter. I don't have a podcast

to say that on anymore, so I'll say it here. I write for fandom.wikia.com. You'll find my thoughts on comics, movies, video games, all that stuff on there professionally. But I'm still part of the Lazer Time family, appearing on podcasts like this or Lazer Time. And I also want to say that this is created by Patreon.com slash Lazer Time. The support on Patreon made this and all the other podcasts on Lazer Time possible.

And you can find the first season of Talking Simpsons right there. Patreon.com slash LazerTime. You scroll through the recent posts, you will see Black Smithers welcoming you to season one. Welcome to all the new content, sir. And Chris, did you do your spiel? No, but LazerTime, I'm so tired. What a great show The Simpsons is.

I should go to bed. You've been hard at work in the content mines. Yeah. So thanks for listening. Oh, 30-20-10. 30-20-10, yes. I should go to bed. You've been hard at work in the content mines. Yeah. So thanks for listening. Oh, 302010. 302010, yes. I'm putting a cap on six podcasts today.

Oh, boy. I think of 302010 as a sister podcast to this. It has similar nostalgia over 30 years ago, 20 years ago, and 10 years ago, and where we did talk

a lot about Wondershows and a few episodes ago. That's a good one. Give a listen to that. Thanks so much for listening we'll be back next week with the return of sideshow bob wow infotainment.