Talking Simpsons - Talking Simpsons - Margical History Tour

Episode Date: March 26, 2025

"All my life I was looking for that one woman whose execution could bring me happiness. Now I realize I was just beheading myself for divorcing you." - Homer Simpson (as Henry VIII) Discover the magic of history and state-funded learning institutions as Marge leads us through three different tales from the past that may or may not be parodies of popular films from the 1980s. Support this podcast and get over 200 ad-free bonus episodes by visiting Patreon.com/TalkingSimpsons and becoming a patron! And please follow the official Twitter, @TalkSimpsonsPod, not to mention Bluesky and Instagram!

This podcast is brought to you by Patreon.com slash Talking Simpsons. Head there to check out exclusive podcasts like Talking Futurama, Talk King of the Hill, the What a Cartoon Movie Podcast, and tons more. or product. the guy who wouldn't shut his maze hole, Bob Mackie, and this is our chronological exploration of The Simpsons. Who is here with me today as always? Henry Gilbert, checking out my Yu-Gi-Oh! Price Guides! And this week's episode is... Marginal History Tour.

There, there. I can help you, kids. I know a little something about history. Gather round! This episode originally aired on February 8th, 2004 and as always, Henry will tell us what happened on this mythical day in real world history. Oh boy Bobby, the Facebook launches on Harvard campuses. You Got Served tops the box office, and with several more wins in primaries, John

Kerry solidifies his win of the Democratic presidential primary. You said John Kerry and win in the same sentence and I was about to correct you, Henry. Hey, he was able to defeat people to his left, which is all the Democrats can do. He was reporting for duty. He defeated the beloved John Edwards. Remember that? That's right. Howard Dean, Wesley Clark. There are so many winners. It seems like the cancellation or scandals of John Edwards actually did make it so he didn't have to see him anymore. I don't think I ever see him do anything now. He was a wife cheater, correct?

I believe that, yeah. I think he did a lot of cheating too. More than just was a wife cheater, correct? I believe that, yeah. I think he was, did a lot of cheating too. Like, not more than just your average wife cheater. And of course, who could forget little Dennis Kucinich. The one who was the most right about things and everybody made fun of him for being a pussy. Yes, I saw him do a speech live around this time actually at my college. Oh nice. There was a great clip of Kucinich from around this time where that was used to show how much things have changed with regard to trans people and like Kucinich was mentioning in a speech that he would have a trans member of his party and then followed it up being shown on the Daily Show, John Stewart makes a transphobic joke about it which which he apologized for later.

Yeah yeah I'm glad he did and walked back a few of the things he said in the past. But Kucinich, I did enjoy him at the time. At the time, I was also a hyper radicalized Michael Moore Democrat. Now I've moved really further to the left, but I was super engaged in this election season, being also a college student at the same time. Yeah, at this moment, I was really convincing myself of like, you know what, I think John Kerry can do it and he's not perfect, but it'll, it's gonna work out. And speaking of college, so I didn't go to Harvard,

in case any of you are wondering, I went to a state school, Youngstown State University, that is, and we got Facebook in, I think, 2005. It might've been late 2005, so it wasn't too long before this spread out to other colleges. It was years before I got onto Facebook, but I also was very slow to even use MySpace. I was using MySpace, you know, I feel like a year after high school, so I was using MySpace. And then when I, years after this, heard about Facebook after it dropped the V, I don't really

think I really plugged into it. Twitter was the social media that finally captured my brain. Well, honestly for me, I was 23, so my thought was a way to meet girls. But that actually ended up being LiveJournal. I made a lot of friends and met a few girlfriends via LiveJournal, believe it or not. And I believe I started my LiveJournal around time. This episode was airing. Nice. I, I was more engaged with live journal as well though. I didn't use it for writing much. It was more for following creatives.

Like I use live journal to know if and when venture brothers got renewed for instance. Oh yeah. I followed the venture brothers account or it was Doc Hammer, Jackson public, maybe Jackson public had a live journal. Public was the one who I read the most, who would give you production updates and basically imagine a time where, instead of getting daily updates from a creative, you follow on Twitter, every three months he might post something like,

guys, it just got renewed, I can tell you right here. It was a fun little community they had over there on live journal. And you got served, I'm only familiar with what I think is the very funny South Park parody, although it's one of those South Park parodies where they do the same joke over and over. It was kind of funny at the time. I remember it being a good episode that really just takes off on the idea of the film itself.

I remember cleaning movie theaters when it was there, and I've seen the end of it a few times, but it seemed like your standard early aughts dance film, like a teen PG-13 dance film and you get to see like, oh, people who do good dancing and it's filmed. Like that's nice. But you can't mock it too much because it did actually like popularize a phrase. Like if somebody says you got served in any context, it's because either of this movie or they watch that South Park. Now people are serving things, right? Oh, that's right. She's serving blank.

That's right. Man, now we need to have the follow up of if somebody does serve you the C word, you should then say, you got served the C word. In the following decade, the focus was really more on the server than the servee. You know, that takes it away from the victim blaming. It's more about the person who's doing it. It's bigging up the person who did the serving, not mocking a person for being served. You know, based on my experience, there's a lot of bullying in the drag community.

It's why I can't watch those shows. They're all so mean to each other. Oh man, they'd read us raw on those shows. I refuse to be read. I would flee. So that is what happened in the magical time of when this magical episode first aired. Yes, and we were talking about another non-Triass of Horror anthology episode, and I remember not liking this at the time, being a 21-year-old Simpsons viewer,

but I kind of like this one a lot now because it's just full of really fun jokes, and I do like the premise. To me, at least, these are all history eras and chunklets I'm not very familiar with, so maybe I just enjoy them more because it's all fresh material. Yeah I see that. I remember being less enthused with it then, but also as I whined on iDobot a lot, that really was like a new level of souring for me. So I think that was still a bad taste in my mouth by the time I see them do another non-Treehouse trilogy that made me like, oh, another one of these. Boy, they're scraping the bottom of the barrel now, aren't they?

Yeah, they're really running out of ideas. And here we are 21 years later, the idea well still not tapped. Now I do remember this one because it has one of my favorite jokes from this era and it's not even a big joke and we'll get to it. It's the joke about the Sac of Jowee a dollar. Oh that that is a good one and I think that middle one is the third one is my favorite execution wise of like telling a parody but the middle one I think has the funniest jokes in it. And Al Jean admits that it's difficult to find famous historical stories that are really featuring women, which is why we have the Simpsons tall tales with Connie Appleseed. Of course, Akajewia was a woman, but in the Amadeus parody, she's Sally, short for Sally Airy. Right, right. Though Sally Airy is

not related to Mozart like in this one. Right, right. There are many mistruths in that third segment. I noted that this one is only written by Brian Kelly. So this is also just like with the tree house. They've decided that they're going the cheaper route of only assigning one writer to a script on these trilogies. And it's directed by Mike B. Anderson, who also did direct Tales from the Public Domain. And I thought like, oh oh this was every every season right and it's like not really so there's vital stories 10 tall tales is 12 public domain 13 then they took off 14 and now 15 they they have their next trilogy. Yeah and I will credit the director Mike B. Anderson because this episode like the other anthology, just needs so many new assets in terms of

background characters and backgrounds and characters that we are familiar with in new outfits, especially the Amadeus parody. There are so many unique characters and so many audience scenes that I feel like there should have been more complaining on the commentary. Well, Mike B. Anderson, by that point, he might have been the supervising director, so he's like going to be even more careful not to be mad about it. I could see that. I could see that. But this seems like a lot for a director, a lot. Every every act is like a whole different ball game. Yeah. And unlike in tree house of horrors where a tree house story might take place

and one of them might take place in the current show, but with like a fantastical thing. Not all of them are set in a different place where everybody needs to be redesigned. Every one of these needs to be completely redone. And like compared to even with the previous one, when they did Joan of Arc, now when they return back to a similar timeframe, even in the Tudors era, they still can't reuse that stuff because the English dress different than the French. It's all new assets and God bless the internet because there's no longer the need to call a library and ask like what were people wearing in the 17th century? This episode is a tribute

to the dying library in the burgeoning internet of 2004. Yeah, they were talking on the commentary about like what did they do before the internet? Well, it involved calling research libraries and having a lot of people on staff that would go out to libraries and get books and ask questions. And I think, I mean, I associate all of this history knowledge with the Harvard crew of this era. And I feel like this knowledge is not as valuable anymore just because of the iPhones we all have in our pockets.

You could be the guy who knows about history before the advent of the smartphone, and you could be known for that. But now anyone can just stop the conversation, look something up, continue the conversation. You don't need the Harvard-educated history major to be part of your crew. You don't need to have the one guy in your group who's like,

well, I read the new book on the history of Lewis and Clark and then share ideas. Or you can even now Google, did Lewis and Clark really know Sacajawea? And then you'll get an AI answer that is probably half correct. It'll spit out half of an episode guide for the Adventures of Lewis and Clark, the Superman show. Man, Sacajawea was really weak to kryptonite.

I can't believe that show operated on that pun for so long. Yeah, it was the 90s. You could do anything on TV then. I do like, when I see the list of the other episodes, I do like this one more than the public domain. I think I like that this feels more recent instead of, you know, the, I don't know, the Odyssey. Listen to that.

I prefer the direct history. Yeah, I just, it feels more inspired. And I just like the jokes better in this one. No pedophilia jokes in this one. Although we do watch Lisa struggle and fail to grow a penis. You know what, actually I take that back. I do think the joke about Sacagawea being sold to her husband would count as a pedophile joke as well.

Sure, sure. Although the husband is Milhouse. Yeah. So they're the same age. So yeah, I guess you're right there. But after a fun microwave couch gag, we then end up at the library. It's dead, which I think both me and you live in places with thriving libraries that are doing good. Yeah, and in Berkeley where we used to live, the library system was very nice.

I've been taking advantage of the Vancouver library system, and I guess this is our ad for libraries because a library isn't a building you go into and just find a book and take it home. The way libraries work, for me at least, is I wanna read a book, go to the library's website and search in their search engine. If they have the book, it doesn't even have to be at my local library, it could be within the system.

They'll send it to your library, you go pick it up, you talk to no one, you walk out and you save yourself whatever that manga would have cost you. And they even have like Digital borrowing now too. Like that's how I got how to train your dragon the original book version Physical copies were out at the time, but I could then digitally borrow it. It's it's really nice Yeah, and the people who write those books they get royalties from the library system. So you're not stealing or anything I don't think anyone thinks that but I've heard that weird claim

Before and also the more you use your library the more funding it gets library system so you're not stealing or anything. I don't think anyone thinks that, but I've heard that weird claim before. And also, the more you use your library, the more funding it gets. So we encourage you, if there's a book you want to read and you don't want to pay $35 for a hardcover, check your library. Again, if they don't have it at your local library, there's a system in play, and they

can send it to your library. God, I can't remember the name of it. There's like a streaming service that also uses your library cartoon in the US. Libby. Libby is the, I guess Libby's the barring service. I know you're talking of it. There's like a streaming service that also uses your library cartoon in the US. Libby is the, I guess Libby's the barring service that I know you're talking about. It's like a Netflix thing, right? And also you know there's, at mine, there's tons of DVDs including like I saw one they had the

out-of-print Animago release of Yoara which like is just sitting there on the shelf. I was like wow wow, that's crazy. And you know what? They do have nice bathrooms. Mine is the one in Bellevue, Washington is very well lit. And by the way, if you see somebody sleeping there, leave them alone and don't be a fucking narc. Let somebody sleep. Yeah, especially in the Pacific Northwest where we live, people need to get out of the rain. And the library is one of the last places you can just go and hang out for free. Yeah, and use a bathroom. And so, if somebody wants to just sit there and sleep inside the

library, just leave them alone and don't talk to somebody. So I wonder how libraries are faring in other parts of the U.S. that listeners live in, but it was nice and remains nice to live in places that value the library and obviously the people who run the government in America right now don't want libraries to exist. There's no reason for them. Yeah, I mean, I guess we're lucky we still have them and right now every social benefit is being dismantled seemingly. Yeah, I think I've read that that I forget who said this. I read a tweet once that had a very wise thing that said it's amazing that libraries

exist because if they didn't exist and then you tried to pitch the government do them it would never happen right now. Yeah they would treat it like free healthcare like oh so you just want a book for nothing. Oh and what internet and computers too just for that? I guess this place, this magical place has a bathroom that's free? Yeah, I've seen that tweet before. If someone thought it up today, they would be laughed out of the room by professionals, politicians. We're lucky to have it and once they go away, we won't get them back, just like all the other things that used to be good and we don't get back anymore. Yes. So support your local library, use it, and if there are things you can vote for that

increase the funding, please do. But in the Simpson's Springfield Library, it is fully emptied out. The old lady there says books are for squares, which definitely is very ADR looking line. I wish I knew what her original line was. Yeah. I thought my video file was out of sync when she started talking. I was like, wait, wait, wait. well okay it's ADR all right. And for the third time in this broadcast season Homer is equated to being an unhoused man. Yeah we pan across

the the table of sleeping on house people Homer is there at the end. And he pulls himself up as they're talking and this also is where I was thinking like okay he's been compared to the homeless a lot this time, right? And this one was when he finds his mom, he hugs the homeless man instead of her. And in the Christmas episode, he is handing out free pants to the unhoused and they say that his pants smell worse than their pants. Yes. So a lot of unhoused jokes in this.

And then when we get to Homer and the pan, I feel like they got out of soundboard and hit I, Carumba on that sound I feel like they got out of soundboard and hit iKarumba on that soundboard because it just is out of nowhere. It's like, oh, we need something, we need somebody to react. Yeah, that feels too thin. Like there's a few lines in here that are like, oh, come on, you can do better than that. Like, and this is the season that had like Bart say iKarumba indeed, which is them making fun of using iKarumba in this way they are using it. indeed, which is them making fun of using iKarumba in this way they are using it. So we see that the library is emptied out. This also feels like a joke got cut because Lisa lists two things and a third thing seems to be that poster of

Itchy and Scratchy that goes uncommented on. Yeah, I guess the poster is a joke in itself because you see the poster, it's just an ad for Itchy and Scratchy at the bottom in very small text. It just has the word read. That's, yeah, that's, I mean, I think that's a good joke that it's a joke about how when we were growing up, they had all these ads of like Garfield at the library tells you to read Kermit tells you to read, but they really in function tell you about a TV show you could be watching right now.

Yeah, it's advertising forward. Though the two things I get mentioned are Yu-Gi-Oh! Price Guides, which it's wonderful that The Simpsons has a joke about Yu-Gi-Oh! Yes, it's great to see Yu-Gi, I guess the character's name is, in The Simpsons' style. And we covered Yu-Gi-Oh! many years ago on the What a Cartoon podcast.

If you want to hear us talk about Yu-Gi-Oh! we've done it. We did it twice. We did the first Yu-Gi-Oh! series, and then we even had on the creator of Yu-Gi-Oh! A Bridge to talk about 5Ds. We have two Yu-Gi-Oh! episodes? We really do. I'm hearing this for the first time. This is back when we when we did weekly one of cartoons. We were crazy. We were pretty nuts. But hey, those are good episodes. And Bob, did you read Everybody Poops as a Kid? I did not.

It was never given to me. I only saw this referenced in The Simpsons and Family Guy and other things. I never encountered this. I think we had mastered pooping by the time we were kids. I feel like it sounds like too dirty a book to be read to Arkansas children when I would have been handed this at like age four. But it's an international bestseller. It's a nice book with the idea of like, hey, if you feel ashamed of having to use the bathroom or potty training, you should know that every animal poops. And it's a Japanese book, and the Japanese are much more comfortable with the idea of pooping.

They invented the famous poop emoji. Will I have gone in Tokyo to the poop museum or the poop emoji museum, the Unko Museum that's in Odaiba? Will I? I thought you were gonna say, will I have pooped in Japan? Well, you're gonna be there for seven days, so I hope so. Yes, the original book, Minna Unchi by Taro Gomi. It's the original one, 1977.

So early localization of that into America, a big hit. I've read the manga. Though you know what? Gomi, the creator of it, clearly failing to make all the money he can off of it. There is no app for it. Like there is no, there's apps called Everyone Poops that is a total rip off of it,

but there's no app for Everybody Poops. Okay, yeah, I just, I guess this person is probably dead because this is a 60 year old book. Yeah, you would think wouldn't you? 50, 50 year old. No, hey, born in 45, so still pooping to this very day. Good, good. I'm glad to hear that about Mr. Gomi. I think it's still being passed around by parents too. I swear in the last year a friend with kids in my feed I saw on Instagram

sharing with their toilet training child that everybody poops to keep that tradition going. But yeah, to hear Lisa say Yu-Gi-Oh price guides, a wonderful thing. Yeah, yeah. Just the fact that there was a Simpsons Yu-Gi-Oh meeting of minds at least. Crazy. And then we see the intro line from the episode where Marge lets us know that she's going to be the one telling the story. And you know what? I think it's nice that Marge for once gets to be the framer and the storyteller of these

things. And we get a lot of very funny jokes about Marge being a weird nerd. Yeah. You know, just a few episodes ago, they had that joke where Marge is doing easy Sudoku and we're just like, Oh, that's too stupid for Marge. Like I, I like that Marge also thinks it's neat, some parts of history. Yeah, although these kids are all eight and 10,

I think this kind of material is way out of their league. Yeah, that's true. I mean, Lisa would know this stuff, but would Bart, okay, I could see a fourth grade teacher assigning Mozart, maybe. Maybe, but it's like, what did he write? When did he die? Not like what?

What is the story of the movie Amadeus? Also, I wondered like, oh yeah, why isn't Homer telling the story? It's because he's still sleeping. He will only wake up by the time for the third story for his last joke. He's featured heavily throughout, but in different forms. And so March starts off with helping Millhouse, which I guess that's what they need for three stories. It can't be a Maggie story or a Homer story. So this one has to be prompted by Millhouse of all people.

Yeah. All the kids do the mo, whaa? When Marge says, I can help you kids. That is great. I love that they, it's so overly dramatic. They can't imagine Marge could help us. And I guess the story is they need Marge here because the library got rid of all of its books. It's now a multimedia learning center. So you get all of these extravagantly designed backgrounds and new characters. But whenever you come back to Marge, they're just sitting in front of empty shelves. That is where they save themselves some design trouble. Yeah, a little bit. Yeah.

So we start with the first story of The Tudors, which I only know of that era thanks to watching several films in the 90s and aughts about it, including the the Cate Blanchett Elizabeth, which is basically picks up at the end of this story. I didn't ever see a Henry VIII movie. Yeah, there's the famous TV series The Tudors. I thought it was recent. No, it's seven, fifth, sorry, 18 years old. Oh, Jesus. Yeah, it's almost as old as this episode. Now, now British people, they, they grew up probably learning about this to the extent that like we were taught about our founding fathers. And, you know, when you read about Henry the eighth and how

he, you know, destroyed the Catholic Church just so he could try to keep marrying women and he kills some of them. Like it is an interesting story about like a fat jerk. It's funny. And to be honest, when I hear Henry the Eighth, I do think of that Herman's Hermit Song, which is not actually about Henry the Eighth. So I'm glad they work it in up front here. Yeah, actually that's our first clip here as Homer takes us in with his rendition of Herman's Hermit's Song. I'm Henry the 8th, I am. Henry the 8th, I am, I am.

I've been eating since 6 a.m. For dessert I'll have dinner again. My name's synonymous with gluttony. I'll always eat a turkey or a ham. Stop singing that song! We all know who you are. Uh, Majesty, Margarine of Aragon. What are you doing out of bed?

I just planted my seed in your womanly dirt. Your Majesty, I know you want a son, but must we discuss my womb in front of the entire court? As royal physician, it is my learned opinion that her womb is filled with sea serpents. This episode is so packed with jokes, even in the eating montage

while he sings the song, it could just be the funny song but there are a few psychics worked in, like he pulls a drumstick out of a pie. The pig with the apple on its mouth he pulls out the apple, another one pops back in so it's sort of like an apple dispenser. No, that's great. When he pulls the turkey leg out of the pie, that's when he's like, for dessert, I'll have dinner again, and that's him turning a dessert into dinner. Yeah. I also love how

Homer is eating it like a king at that time would have, all with his hands. Just shoves his hand into the pie and then scoops the goo into his mouth. And yeah, and here's Dr. Nick, a character I feel like they were getting tired of or just had no use for around this time. I think, I think we talked about it in a recent episode where they just realized, Oh, like, Oh, Hibber can also be the bad doctor and we already have him. Why do we also need Dr. Nick? So Dr. Nick is about to be executed in the movie. Of course he will survive that. Yeah, it's true. He's seen as so easily dispensed with that they will mark him as a character they can kill and they won't even stick with that,

which does still bug me. I do not like that. I know, look, we just did the previous 15 episode is the one where they unkill Marvin Monroe. That one they were less committed to, but like they for real fully kill, they for real kill Dr. Nick on screen and make it obvious. Yeah with Marvin Monroe there was just the Marvin Monroe Memorial Hospital which was a joke just to explain where the character went and then which popular characters died on the Simpsons? That trivia question. Those jokes are less canonical but you know Bob I

growing up can you believe that I loved I'm Enter E the 8th I Am as a song? I can believe it. Hey, I liked it too. And I think I first heard it in the movie Ghost, which it's the song that Patrick Swayze's character would sing to annoy his fiance slash girlfriend, whatever their relationship was. And then I think that's how she knows it's really him because there's a connection between them in that song. Oh, that's cool. You know, I actually haven't seen Ghost.

My mom loved Ghost, as did most moms in 1990. I mean, Patrick Swayze is quite hot in it. I understand it. So I was a big oldies radio listener when I was around 10, 8 to 10, listened to the old East Station all the time and I believe I even saw Herman's Hermits perform this live because they would have like, the Old East Station would do a concert every year at the, where the Braves played baseball. It's also fun because it's this, the guy's not masking his accent anyway,

like, I'm Henry Dife. Like you hear all the Britishness coming out of him, like kind of like a lower class British accent too. And you know another reason I liked it? Because I'm Henry, but also my brother's name is the Sam. So everyone wants an Henry, they never want a Willie or a Sam. No, Sam!

You can see why I liked that as the older brother. Take that Sam. Well, you were Max until it was convenient, Henry. That's what you're telling me. It's true. Wait, now I'm Henry. I'm back to Henry. For the... Actually, while covering this, I'm like, wow, I'm writing the word Henry down a lot. I did like that song despite going by Max still as a kid. When it was a song that dragged down

Sam's in the song with no Sam's. When Homer says, or a ham, you're supposed to then, if you're singing at Herman's Hermit style, you're supposed to join in with a ham, you're supposed to then, if you're singing at Herman's Hermit style, you're supposed to join in with no ham because you're supposed to sing no Sam's. Was your brother just fuming in the back seat waiting for the pro Sam song to show up on the radio? I mean, he got, we traded barbs quite a lot then. He was probably getting up his next one for me. But yeah, I also, this was this being a British song, it actually

like is an older song than like pop music. Like this is like a it's like the John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt kind of song that had been around for like decades before Herman's Hermits. Yeah, it feels like it would have been a drinking song and also much dirtier in its original form. This is another one of those times where I complain that the Simpsons wiki is run by too many British people But the the references page on this one Most of them are saying like this is actually what happened in the tutors and this is actually what this song is about I was like, okay, the Brits wrote this when they don't know shit about Lewis and Lewis and Clark in it or Lewis and Clark Yeah, who knows if that even aired in the UK?

on sky After the song. Oh, yeah, like said Bob, the song is a reverse tutors. It's about a guy who is the eighth Henry who's been married to this woman. Right. So we see that Marge is margerine of Aragorn, which is like the... You're right, the first time. Ah damn it, Aragorn. Henry is Lord of the Rings pill, I knew was going to make this mistake. It's the... Aragorn is the... We've talked a lot today. 87 year old ranger. That's right. Yes. Because he's... well, because he's a Numenor.

Well, I didn't know that. I couldn't think of that. That's only in the extended edition because it would have been too confusing to people. But yes, he's a Numenor. He's not actually a human anyway. Yeah, the real one is Catherine of Aragon, so that's Marge to Catherine is Margerine. And Margerine is a cute little joke, right? Yes, it is cute. It is. But in reality, yes, Henry VIII was having trouble having sons, though for the point of this story he never has sons.

In reality, he did have sons. They just didn't live very long, or they were bastards.. Yeah these kings lived some pretty decadent lifestyles and if you read about the actual one of Henry VIII he just became a human gout. He just became the personification of gout. He was a pile of sores and open wounds. Yeah just like they all had black they just were just chugging wine and eating constantly and there was no there's no thought of like hygiene or exercise or anything so they actually lived harder lives than peasants who were just eating healthy things because that's all they could afford and find. That was the sign of his wealth

was being a big fat guy that he could afford to be fat. I think in reality he probably couldn't make a son because his dick didn't work. Yes, yeah, I think that was part of it. Yeah, like he had to be impotent or something. I don't understand how any of this functioned. But here Homer, or Henry, is dreaming of the son he could have. Father dearest, I am the son you crave. I'm smart, athletic, and ever so masculine. Could a girl belch like this?

Oh, my beautiful boy, Why can't I have you? Oh, too much jerk in your murkin? You little scum! Get out of my dream! Get out of my way! I could have married the King of France. He wasn't so preoccupied with procreation. Ting-a-ling-a-ling. Know what I mean? Oh, look at me. I eat and eat and eat, and I never get any thinner.

Well, there's more of you to worship, Osir. Oh, what dare to flatter a king. Anne Boleyn, loyal subject, big fan. Modern Wench Magazine dubbed me Anne of the Child-Bearing Hips. Yes, wide hips indeed. My son could cartwheel out. Yoink. Where are you taking me? Marriage counseling. Oh. Yes, wide hips indeed. My son could cartwheel out. Yoink!

Wait, where are you taking me? Marriage counseling. Ohhhh. So Bart is citing the name of executive producer David Merkin. Hahaha, it's Jerkin your Merkin. Is this the first time Simpsons has used the term jerk or jerkin to mean masturbation? Masturbation, yeah. This could be the first time they used the word merkin, which I guess is the pubic hair wig. That's right, yeah man. He's... God. Yeah, this could be the first time they used the word Merkin, which I guess is the pubic hair wig.

That's right. Yeah, man. He's... God. I also like that Homer strangles his dream son too. He's still able to strangle Bart, even though he doesn't exist. And this Anne Boleyn character, I feel like she should be Lindsay Nagel, but she's kind of not.

I mean, the voice is Lindsay Nagel, but also like her hair color changes into another scene too. Yeah. The design isn't her and, but also like her hair color changes into another scene too. Yeah, the design isn't her and she doesn't have her attitudes. I'm thinking why didn't they make this into her or an existing female character? They just make an Ambo-Lynn. Usually it's a stand-in. It's like Hibbert is this guy, Ned is this guy, but here it just feels like a wholly new character.

And the joke is she hands her business card, which is a Lindsay Nagel action too. Yeah, that's true. Maybe that's why, maybe it is her and the design is not better. Yeah I think well I I definitely see her hair change between scenes too. The Simpsons will be right back. Fox February, The Simpsons will blow you away with all new episodes. You wet your pants. Shut up! It's a serious problem. They're rewriting history.

I'm going to canonize you. Making new best friends. My nose makes its own bubble gum. And they'll leave you begging for more. Do you have any pointers for a newbie? You would do well with crazy guy. The Simpsons all new on Fox laugh out loud Sunday. Welcome to the break everybody.

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of over seven years of Patreon podcasts. One more time at patreon.com slash talking simpsons But if you want something even nicer than all of the food Henry the eighth eats in this episode You need to get the kingly treatment by signing up at patreon.com slash talking simpsons $10 level the premium podcast we put out every month is more like three podcasts in one. I'm talking about what a cartoon movie, our monthly animated feature film discussion that's often over five hours long. We cover an animated feature film as in-depth as an episode of The Simpsons. Last month you could have heard us talking about 2010's How to Train Your Dragon, the

first truly great DreamWorks animated feature. And this month we are talking about 1986's An American Tale, directed by Don by Don Bluth produced by Steven Spielberg a big event film of the 80s And that's just the most recent one of six whole years of what a cartoon movies We've covered all of the Disney Renaissance tons of other Disney classics Warner stuff like a bunch of Batman cartoons and Space Jam and Iron Giant and a bunch of anime not just a bunch of studio Ghibli films But also end of Evangelion or project Ako and we even did our longest podcast ever at that level six and a half hours about who framed Roger Rabbit doesn't that all sound great on top of all the other ad free stuff you just heard me talk about

for five bucks a month see it all for yourself one more time at patreon.com Talking Simpsons. You know, I know we always say this, but I swear, Dana Gould is the guy that taught them that like, ding-a-ling-a-ling means homo. Yes, yes. He said that on podcast, I think it's even been quoted on the commentary, that's his move, the ding-a-ling-a-ling. So you have Marge quoting Dana Gold in this scene.

I love hearing Marge even say, know what I mean? To like, well, who is she saying this to, to herself? The reality of that joke is that Louis XIII was the King of France about 70 years after this and most historians do believe he was a closeted gay man. Though what even is gay back then? Yeah, who can say? A nice little Mad Magazine style joke on the Ambulan business card where the text is,

a son will come out tomorrow. That is good. Oh, you know, another great line, who would dare to flatter a king? A great line. This is also where the show is so divorce minded at this time. Like I feel like it's the most divorced the staff, writing staff had been at this point. Yeah, I'm not tracking it, but yeah, more spats, more tiffs. I think they really wanted to do this one, not just because, you know, you know Henry the eighth is a funny story but also they like this in tree houses as well. They want to tell stories where Homer can have sex with women who aren't

Marge and where he can kill people too and this lets him do both. Absolutely. So this is where they meet with Hibbert who is a therapist for some reason I guess because he didn't do the the sea serpent's joke earlier that dr. Nick did Yeah, I guess this is why we have dr. Nick because dr. Hibbert's doing this thing And you know what great cover design on the Yorker as a parody of the New Yorker because it's just York in England That gave me a chuckle and he then tells them that they can't get divorced But once under threatened of death he does let tell them to get a divorce. This is where Homer Henry comes to the idea that the real Henry did, which is, I gotta start my own religion to get a divorce then, because the Catholics won't let me do it. I love seeing Ned as Thomas

Moore. There's a real figure who he did execute for not allowing him to have a divorce and break from the Catholic Church. Yeah, I believe this is where, no, I'm no history buff here, but Anglicanism. Anglicanism came about. I believe so, yeah. This is the establishment of the Church of England, I'm pretty sure. Yeah, and it was a real gotcha in this online atheist era where you could say, well, this sect only exists because Henry VIII wanted a divorce. That was a real, keep that in your pocket, whip it out at a believer, see watch them freak out. It's impressive that the tenacity of Christianity to hold on even after that. I also love the Ned's big wah to the reaction of like, I'll start my own church. We have two wah in just the first act alone. And yes, please correct any of our ignorances

on this podcast. Well, I'll tell you one thing I did look up that Homer said that it'll be so popular that divorce will be so popular that 50% of marriages will end in it. That's an old statistic. I looked it up like, okay, how true is that now? I found several places that said it's more like 38 to 40% these days. Okay, well yeah, I guess people are not rushing into it as much as they used to, or they're just not able to rush into it. One article I saw pointed out that apparently, despite the opposite of what I assumed at the start of COVID, apparently lockdown actually led to fewer divorces.

The rate went down instead of, you would have figured like, if your marriage is on the rocks, being forced to be around your partner all the time would speed up divorce. More murders though, more spousal murders. Hey COVID stopped me from getting married. I think it decreased the marriage rate too. Maybe too the fewer divorces is because now at least in the United States, which these are the numbers I'm using here, that same-sex marriage was legalized and so maybe there's fewer divorces as they've opened up the amount of people who can get married. I can see that. But yes, Homer

decides to break from the celibate Italian weirdo and he says he's going to canonize him which means shooting him out of a cannon and this is a clever joke about history because he did execute Thomas More, Henry VIII, and in 1935 Thomas More was canonized by Pope Pius XI.

And you normally need to be a martyr for that, so Homer took care of that. He did indeed martyr him, which apparently if you use that term for Christian religion, it's not a loaded term that apparently is like evil if you use it for other religions. No, it means they're awesome. They're heroes. But yeah, like Thomas Moore did. I did not laugh at I Can See My House From Here. There's a couple jokes in here that are not funny Yeah, that just feels like filler to me same with I dumped you you didn't dump me line coming up a little later

That was another one. I was like, yeah, you guys can do better. Yeah, I could have you some punching up there Well, they don't apologize for that joke, but they do apologize for the joke of Lisa trying to grow a penis Which is in our next clip here penis which is in our next clip here. Yes. Sweetie, sometimes a daddy and a mommy decide to live apart. It's not your fault. It's just that you came out the wrong sex and ruined everything. To grow a penis or get lost. I can't. Bye-bye. Well, why can't your heir be female? Or why can't we elect our leaders? I wonder if I could canonize a child.

Leaving! Hey, I invented the voice! How did you get half of everything? You should have invented the prenup. And now half of your kingdom, please. I get Ireland? Ha ha ha! And by the power vested in me by you just now I pronounce you king and trophy queen.

In the name of the Henry, the Hank, and the Holy Harry, Amen. Henry. Yeah, the Lisa joke at the time I thought, well this is a new level of gross for the show. And it's supposed to be a gross joke but I think they realized later like oh this makes you think about Lisa's genitals in a way that we don't want you to focus on too much while watching the Simpsons and Al Jean says that was mine and I'm sorry because everyone in the commentary is grossed out as well. I'm glad that he takes responsibility for it like yeah I mean by itself and it's one of those things you can get away with when it's not really Lisa. But yeah, seeing seeing Lisa with her legs like apart as she's trying to will a penis to grow out of her,

like I it's disturbing. Yeah. Also, they don't name her. My guess at first was like, oh, well, of course, Lisa would be Elizabeth. Like that would Elizabeth the first, like that makes sense for it. But this would imply that based on timing that Lisa is Margarine's daughter, which would be Bloody Mary, not Elizabeth. Based on the name, I think she's bad, right? Yeah, no, she was a Catholic freak. Or at least in the films about Elizabeth the first that I have watched, usually her sister Mary is shown as she's the villain and the bad guy of the story. But a great breakfast cocktail. We can thank her for that, which obviously as a Catholic freak I think she would not have enjoyed an alcoholic drink being named after her.

I personally don't like Bloody Marys, I'm sorry everybody. Well you live in the the land of the Caesar, right? That's true, hey that's that's Clamado in vodka, none of this tomato juice crap. Though how often are you ordering Caesars as well? I don't think I've had one for like five years. But yeah I thought honestly they could have they they didn't need to. This could have been a two-parter of like then Lisa in Act 2 instead of playing Sacagawea. It could just be the story of Elizabeth with Lisa in the place of Elizabeth. But they do immediately have sex in front of everybody at the church and they they lift a banner that says like,

sun making in progress or something. Prince under construction. Prince under construction, yeah. And corny joke, the Lindsay Nagel type says, oh Henry. By the way, Henry, I'm sure you hated this growing up, the O'Henry bars. Well, I found out that they were discontinued in the USA in 2019, but they still exist here in God's country of Canada, although the recipe is slightly different. So I see O'Henry bars all the time, and here I'm thinking they still exist in America. No, they do not. Wow, man. I have never eaten one because I do not like it as a thing that has been said to me. I bet the Canadian one tastes better as most candy I had in Canada that was the equivalent of an American candy tasted better in Canada. I do like O'Henry's I think I've had

maybe three in my lifetime but it's basically I feel like it's like a payday covered in chocolate. You know of all Henry things I hated the most it was the old Looney Tunes characters of Henry that that one I hated the most. Was she referring to Henry Hawk? I think so yeah or I am certain it was taken from some radio show that I've never heard of before. Yeah, it was like an Amos and Andy catchphrase. As usual when I mention something from an old cartoon, I hope that Thad Komorowski is listening to this and tells me in a comment what it's a reference to. So we see that they have sex that Lovejoy has approved of, and then she's given birth to a daughter, which in real life, Anne Boleyn gave birth to Elizabeth. So gets her head chopped off, which is what happened to Anne Boleyn

as well. And they bring up that myth of the head staying alive. I looked into that for Bender's Big Score, remember? Yeah, whatever the results are, they're always upsetting, aren't they? Oh, yes. Here's some of the scary medical truths or theories from it, which was, that's not really true, you're not going to talk, also you couldn't talk even if your head was alive because you have no lungs to put things out of your mouth, but one of the scariest ones was that they can't tell exactly how long you're alive because they can't like test the decapitated head. But after some people die, the like active brain waves keep going after they're dead for like at least a half

hour afterwards. So while your body is dead, your brain slowly dies later. And so that might be like a form of like living death. That's enough time to watch Marginal History Tour on your way out. You can replay it in your brain as it switches off. But yes, in real life you're not really alive after your head is chopped off. Then there's a good gag of Henry VIII watching their version of Itchy and Scratchy, which is a Punch and Judy play. Yeah, full of topical references. I do like him being accused of having a Catholic mass, which is, yes, that's also part of a Catholicism as outlawed. Then when Bloody Mary takes over, she brings back Catholicism in a big way and punishes the people who didn't

do it. And then Elizabeth comes back and reestablishes the Church of England. And we have a reference to Queen for a Day. I did a little research on this Henry. It's not just a slogan. So Homer is waving over one of these royal babes to be queen for a day. And Wigam's like, it's funny cuz you're king. But this is a roundabout reference to the classic game show Queen for a Day which ran from 1956 to 1964 though it was on the radio starting in 1945. And the show began with the host asking, how would you like to be queen for a day? And it was immensely popular to the point where there was a film based on it in 1951. So I believe the slogan

entered our minds because of this famous game show. And the only reason Wiggin would comment on it is because Wiggin knows Homer is making that pop culture reference. That's great. I had no clue about that. That's wow. So that's that's like saying like this is your life like a similar situation. Yes, exactly, exactly. Wow, man. But of course he means, I'm going to kill her very quickly. And it is Jane Seymour, is the woman he married as well. Love her on Dr. Quinn. I'm sure I'm surprised they didn't make that reference.

Yeah, actually, that's that is surprising, though they they instead decided to go with Tress McNeil doing basically her Harley Quinn impersonation. Yeah, I would say it's more Lena Lamont from Singing in the Rain, although that actress based that performance on something that came before, but I feel like that's what everyone is drawing from, even Arlene Sorkin. Oh yeah, yeah, I definitely think that's where Arlene Sorkin's pulling it from. Like she loves those old, I mean, the reason we talked about it in the Harley Quinn episode where she sings a song, that was a song she used to sing to Paul Dini all the time, Arlene Sorkin did,

because she grew up loving all of those old movies and those type of dames who say words like, the Ginchy-ist. Yeah. You know, God bless all of you Harley Quinn voice actors, and you're all doing a great job, but I can't accept you unless you have this period-specific accent. I just cannot buy the character unless she is this person. You know, on the Harley Quinn show, the cartoon one, they are using it very lightly, and the cleverest use they did of it is that she only drops back into that extreme version of the accent when visiting her family. Okay, well at least it pops up.

Margot Robbie, though, I feel like the more she plays Harley Quinn the less she uses that voice. I also love how Henry VIII Homer does the like cut motion to his right as he gets married, which he literally means kill this woman. Though in reality, only Anne Boleyn and then his fifth wife Katherine Howard were executed. He didn't execute all of his wives, only the two. And also Otto. Otto gets two jokes in this episode, which an alarming amount of Otto content is happening here. But shouldn't he then... actually he gets a joke in the third act too, except he doesn't die. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like usually get one Otto joke if ever, but now we have two. It's pretty stacked.

No, I wish they killed him in the third act though, like he... Yeah. Because he gets... he also eats the berries and dies in the Lewis and Clark one. Oh, you're right. So he's in all three acts, right? But he doesn't die in the third act Okay. Yeah, no wonder I only remember the first two but yeah, it's full of Otto. It's weird They remembered that they liked doing Otto or maybe you know Just like how Harry Shearer brought back or did Marvin Monroe this season Maybe he did tell him like, you know, my throat feels better guys. I could do Otto some more. There's one thing that I find slightly grating about this era of the Simpsons and it's the

comical use of the word dude to be like just the casual way of saying, man, like Homer's like, I want to sire a royal dude. And then Otto's like, I told you I was a dude. I feel like that is just kind of a go-to silly word they plug in and I just find it kind of irritating, honestly. Yeah, no, I get that. Well, and same again with like, and I can play like you didn't dump me, I dumped you. Like that's, that's a street joke. That's, that's too corny. And then we also have a joke about he somehow married Agnes because she's, uh, she calls her vagina, the Kingmaker. Yeah. Take a ride on the Kingmaker. I'm assuming her being unattractive

is a reference to the Henry VIII's wife Anne of Cleves who is sometimes called the ugly one by tutors experts. We don't have photos. That's part of the fun story. This one I did know because a teacher, a middle school teacher loved this story which was the story as told to me was they were trying to set up Henry VIII with another possible wife. There's Anne of Cleves who's royal. They make a painting of her that is very nice to how she looks, but they also send her a painting

of Henry VIII that is very nice to how he looks. And when they both see each other, they're both like, you're ugly. And it falls apart, but she does not get killed. This is like somebody touched up their photo on Tinder or something. It's like using an old photo on Tinder, yes. Oh yeah, face tuning, they're face tuning.

But they were doing it the kind that only royals could afford when they could hire a portrait artist. Again, British people, tell me how wrong I got that. I'm just telling you what a middle school teacher told me 30 years ago. So Homer kills so many people that Moe has to tell him that he's running out of pikes to stick heads on, which he chops that head off to and has to admit he's wrong. Yeah, yeah.

It's a good severed head Moe joke. Which they admit on the commentary like, oh yeah, we're, severed heads stay alive a very long time in Simpsons land. That means a lot. And so after all of this, Henry is on his deathbed and he turns back to his first love. Oh, I realize I was just beheading myself for divorcing you.

And locking me in a dungeon. Ha ha ha. Ahem. Listen to us. We still finish each other's sentences. Marjorine, won't you take back an old head-chopping fool? Of course, Your Majesty. Let me just fluff your pillow for you. N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N- Finally, Henry's daughter Elizabeth became queen. England's power was never greater, and British actresses always had a role to play when they got to a certain age.

That was awesome, Mrs. S. Check plus plus, here I come! Wow, the library really is a great resource. And I just came in here to trip nerds for nothing. And the real Hender the Eighth not killed by an ex-wife but died of many many many issues at the age of 55. He was chronically obese apparently covered with pus-filled boils. He had a chronic jousting wound that just never healed him was just constantly festering and probably led to a lot of mental issues as well. And yeah he died while still old enough to star in a Mission Impossible

movie. So well also they're cutting out the part where he did have a son who took over the throne, Edward the sixth, though Edward the sixth didn't last very long. Also yet scurvy. I mean, I would assume he must have like if you've got gout, you must have scurvy as well, right? Yeah, just malnutrition in general is bad. The peasants were eating plants and things they found around, and he was like, no, all meat.

I wonder if Marge is letting out some subconscious feelings here with sea and hell fat man, especially because it cuts from her character smothering a homer to then her being happy that he was finally dead. Yeah I think she's working out some issues here and I like this we got think two references to the grading system that Millhouse is operating under he needs a he needs a pumpkin sticker or higher and then when he gets the report he's like check plus plus here I come. I like the ranking of pumpkin

sticker that it's better than like I don't know banana or apple or something but but it's not the best, because you can get higher than that. Marge does say that British actresses play a role when they reach a certain age. Ain't that the truth? Like, if you are offered Elizabeth and you're a British actress, it means you're old now, but also you are famous enough to play her in a film. It's the Mary Jane of that place. Yes, we have Mary Jane, they have Elizabeth the first. This includes people like Helen Mirren, Judy Dench, Vanessa Redgrave. I met Aunt May, everybody, please forgive me. All these Spider-Man people are the same.

I feel bad I didn't correct you on that. Though also with the aging down of stuff, like Cate Blanchett playing it was playing young Elizabeth Elizabeth origins is is that version of the story and I just learned from looking this up that like who else has played her Not a British actress an Australian one, but Margot Robbie has played Elizabeth in the last five years Oh really? Okay, then she's like 32. Yes, yeah, which is obviously hideously old by American standards. Mm-hmm. Like she played Barbie at the last second that she was technically hot by a... What counts in age in America?

By executive pervert standards. Yes. I mean, you saw, you probably saw some of those viral tweets of making fun of people who said, actually Margot Robbie is ugly and here's why, and they list like these things that are saying... They're looking at skull shapes, yeah. Yeah, there will always be Elizabeth to to play no matter what your age as an actress so after this we come back there is a quick deleted scene here because the joke is that Lisa is trying to find a book for her person and all she can find

is a biography of Ron Santo who which I didn't know who Ron Santo was enough for this and I immediately forgot. Well, fortunately, the deleted scene joke, Lisa actually opens the book and reads it. Before we tell you who he is, let's see what Lisa says about his history. In elementary school, we girls learned about Sacajawea while the boys were learning math.

Hmm, Ron Santo was never the greatest player in baseball. He was never the greatest player in Chicago baseball. But for one glorious summer, he was the second best player on the Cubs. This is the story of that summer. Ugh. Okay, Mom, give me what you got. I think that's correct. And reading about him, I believe he's dead now? He passed away? I think so, yeah. Mostly known for his diabetes advocacy, because he was a player despite his diabetes, which

I guess is hard to do. Oh yeah, I think I now remember reading when I went to his page how he died was with a comorbidity with diabetes. So that would make sense. But yeah, being that successful. He died in 2010, so yeah, he's dead. And playing at the highest level in baseball back then, especially with, I would assume, fewer medications and medical help for it, that is very impressive for old Ron Santo.

It's just a funny name, and I'm assuming the player that he was overshadowed by is Ernie Banks, I'm going to say. I looked up, like, who was the best player on his team? And the internet tells me Ernie Banks. It's one of those things where the name is obscure enough that it makes the joke good. Ron Santo is just a funny name, though it brings to mind Monsanto, the evil company. It does. So Lisa instead gets told about Sacagawea, which was all the rage back then.

We all knew about her in America because of her getting on the dollar coin, which is the joke at the end of it. Yeah, I guess I have some info on that, but we can wait till the end to get to the info on that. As of 2000, if you didn't know about her, she was appearing on your money sometimes. Let's say rarely or never. I also was looking up like, okay, why were people talking about Sacajawea as well as Meriwether Lewis and William Clark? What was the renewed interest in it? And I do think partially it was in 1997, there was a nonfiction bestseller by Stephen A. Ambrose, the man who also wrote Band of Brothers. It's called Undaunted Courage and it sold very

well. So I do think with Al Jean types, Harvard graduates, they read this new collection of viewpoint of the story. It's more focused on Lewis than Clark, apparently. And it's also more in the context of Jefferson's presidency. Yeah, I think they reference this book a lot in the commentary and as someone who was going to a lot of bookstores around that time and for like the next 15 years, I do recall seeing this in the history section and on the bestseller shelf, things like that. Apparently HBO was about to adapt it just like they did so successfully with Band of Brothers but it fell apart right before filming back in the mid 2010s. So right before that whole thing was a mess, that whole network.

Yes, yeah, probably that's why it didn't get like restarted because then it got bought by AT&T and they're like, we don't want it. We don't want a Lewis and Clark show. That's gonna put people to sleep. That's for nerds. Bring on Fuckboy Island. And video game adaptations. That too, that too. That's where the level has gone now, that the most prestigious that HBO programming gets to be is adapting a video game that wanted to be as good as an HBO TV show.

Over a decade ago. Over a decade ago. But we meet Lewis and Clark, and what amazing casting of Lenny and Carl as Lewis and Clark, That is so clever. Yeah, and it's the first time I can recall Lenny and Carl driving their own segments, really. They really do get to, and how often do they ever talk to Lisa? It's pretty rare when either of them interact with Lisa. If it happened, it's probably like only in passing and this is the most time

that they ever shared dialogue with each other. And then the rest of the crew are mostly either the bullies or the teens of the the regular cast. And this is where the story begins for us where they meet Sacajawea. When winter came, Lewis and Clark tried to set up camp but encountered much hardship. Come spring they sought help from Native Americans. Long have we awaited the coming of the white man and Carl. Thanks, and welcome to the United States of America. Have a flag, and while you're at it, cover your nakedness and worship our Lord. Yeah, yeah, I'll get right on it. Now, in order to aid your journey across the land,

I offer you the guidance of my daughter, Zaka-Jewia. In our language, her name means little know-it-all, who won't shut her maze hole. I will be happy to help the Americans. Of course, I will be sad to leave my husband, the French fur trader Charbonneau. I will come with you! Because by myself, the darkness, she scares me.

I don't know why I ever sold you to him. We just covered the Rufy episode of The Simpsons, the parody of Rafi, and they're having a lot of fun with French people saying the word she referring to a concept or a person. We had the helpful bear, she will die. You're right. Though also this episode, I mean, boy does it feel a rock war era because two jokes. One, French King ding-a-ling-a-ling and now terrified French trapper. Yeah, yeah. And also handing someone a tiny American flag.

That's right. Wow. Yeah. Casting Milhouse as Charbonneau is cute. It's funny. And yes, apparently it was less than consensual circumstances that led to Sacajawea marrying in quotes, this man. Go to our Pocahontas podcast from last summer. We covered her life, women short end of the stick for a very long time. Yeah. It's why on Wiki pages like Sacajawea, they use marriage as a, they definitely talk more about the consent issues now in history

than they used to for this. And fortunately for our sake, unlike in reality, Lisa is not pregnant when they meet her, which would be accurate for Sacajawea. That's great. I've had enough of Lisa and you know, what's going on downstairs. So I don't need more of that in this act. If they're going to do a joke about her growing a penis, I don't want to see her pregnant. To get away from that gross topic, we then see that they cast her perfectly in this role because they just turned to Lisa being a pedant, which is most of the jokes they write for her at this time. Yeah. A little know-it-all who annoys everybody, even though she is very helpful. She's saving everybody's life. Though the

Wiki, the Wiki page for Sacre Jouy has said that one argument was, while she was a good guide for them, she also was more of like a PR tool in that when they would, as we see later, meet other native tribes, her being with them with a baby helped like ingratiate them some.

It showed they weren't just like a bunch of white men here to murder them. They didn't kill this baby Here though. They don't want to hear any of this and I love how they keep going like, you know what? I'm sick of is your attitude. They just are all rejecting everything To the point where there's killing themselves to avoid following her advice and not only does Otto die and he was Tweedleberger So history should have remembered it as Lewis and Clark and Tweedleburger. And then Moe dies right after that. The Moe thing is a real Looney Tunes, Tux Avery gag because he says, and they said you couldn't open a bar in Kansas. It's immediately destroyed by a tornado. He starts rebuilding it. He

goes nothing crushes the frontier spirit. The bar crushes him. That'll do it. Yeah him saying that'll do it. Not needed, but it's cute enough. I feel like it's almost a Wizard of Oz reference in that it's a, he says it's in Kansas, but of course like Wizard of Oz did not invent the idea of a tornado in Kansas. If his feet like curled under the house, then maybe missed opportunity there. And then after they're both dead, then the second, we just told some of us find solutions instead of just pointing out problem. And we learned that they only got the job because they painted on, uh, they had a fake

compass that was just painted. Apparently no one else had a real one. Then we see that they walked in the complete opposite direction and ended up back in Washington, DC. And great gag of Quimby is Jefferson because his sash says third president. Yeah. Just having to kind of redesign Quimby and make an interior for this White House office

just for one little joke, a lot of work went into these little gags. Yeah, to be told, redo Quimby and make him also Jefferson, readable as Jefferson as well as being Quimby. And so they then head back the other way. This is when they run into a bunch of native tribespeople and there's a good gag that the Bozaneros make the same gun cocking noises as their guns. then head back the other way. This is when they run into a bunch of Native tribes people. And there's a good gag that the Bozan arrows make the same gun cocking noises as their guns.

TG But this is also just a lot of work. I'm noticing a lot of crowds this time, and just an entire group of Native Americans around them. JG Yeah, two giant groups of people are about to kill each other, though this is when Lisa Sacajawea is able to find peace. Don't kill them! They're my friends! Oh, come on. Can we at least have one pity scalp? Ah, my prince-ren-lore. I haven't seen you since I killed all your buffalo. Oh, I don't want to see the bridge, eh?

Eh? Don't forget the eyebrows. Wow, the Columbia River! Now we just ride this baby down to the Pacific and get us some sweet mermaid sex! For the last time, those are salmon! How do you like that? Sacagawea has an opinion. Big surprise.

You know, you could be a little more grateful to us for civilizing you. I am the only reason you guys made it this far alive. From now on, you're on your own. Stupid thing with the compass it's painted on. Ah, she'll be back. She forgot a husband. Boy, if that scene had lasted a few more minutes, the previous scene, we would have seen Bart kill Millhouse and rip his skin off. We can only assume it, though, you know, the setup of like, don't forget the eyebrows, that made me think we'd see his scalp that goes down to the eyebrows that he like literally got scalped instead it's a skull that his eyebrows are on. Yeah Bart I guess scalped everything but the scalp he just carved off all the skin except

for the the hair and the eyebrows. It seems more like he like took the skin off of a guy he decapitated not not so much what at least I think of when I hear of the term scalping. I also think it's not exactly fair that like, oh yeah, the only guy who did the worst of colonialism is the French guy. It avoids American guilt. He's the fall guy for all this. He killed all the Buffalo. Not Americans doing it, which is not true. And the scene about killing Buffalo and Lisa's there and she's wearing period clothing I'm thinking of Connie Buffalo Kill. Oh yeah boy that

yeah that was why we looked up all of the reasoning for that. In the joke in the Simpsons world is they're just so easy to kill. It's not that they were overhunted they're just easy to kill. Oh boy, buffalo testicles. You know what here I can't complain about Lisa trying to grow a penis when we have buffalo testicles in the previous one of these. So she leaves them to blow their noses and squirrels. And also, apparently at some point, at least once, they have had sex with salmon, I have to think. Matt McHugh Yeah, yeah. Kind of like the manatee thing, but a salmon is clearly a fish. They're just too horny.

Jason Kassan It's an even better dumb thing they did. Though then, Sakajuiya heads off off and despite her being smarter than them in all these other scenes, here she is stupid enough to think that a cougar is a warm woolly rock. Yeah. Well, I guess there is a through line here in that Lewis and Clark do use what she taught them to save the day. You're right. It actually does follow a plot thread. And she is Lisa Sacajawea is touched after being saved We're big! We're big! Would you mountain lions find terrifying?

Meow! They remembered what I taught them! Of course we did! We'll never forget you, Pocahontas Sacajawea! Gesundheit! Look! The Pacific Ocean! We made it! We discovered the magnificent Pacific Northwest! I say we give this lovely land a name worthy of its beauty.

Eugene, Oregon. And we owe it all to you. You're gonna get the greatest honor this country can bestow. And today, Louis' promise has been fulfilled. What is that, a quarter? A Chuck E. Cheese token? No, it's a sack of your weird dollar. You can trade it in at the bank for a real dollar.

Talking about street jokes, that Gesundheit thing, oh, come on guys, I always hate that. When somebody says something that is a foreign word or a foreign name and the follow-up is Gesundheit, I think, are we on the Muppet Show? It's a little too dusty for me. Sometimes I like the dusty jokes. This one is just like, oh, this seems like filler. They'd have a better spin on that, too,

of just like, oh, Gesundheit, like, there should be another thing. Like a German guy is there and he's like, thank you, or something, I don't know. There could be a twist on this. Yeah, they reveal a guy named Gesundheit was there the whole time with them and he's like, oh, thank you. Yeah, they just use it as like, they use it in the only intended way. And Bob did amazing research on Pocahontas, read a very informative book, listened to our Pocahontas podcast, learned all about the real Pocahontas, who is not Sacajawea.

Yeah, I liked the movie more than I thought I would. And the research was fascinating and accurate statement about Pacific Northwest the day we're recording this. I'm sure the weather is the same for you, Henry, because we're only a hundred miles away from each other. Gray and rainy, gray and rainy. I was feeling this joke today as I had to use the indoor exercise. I love going to the park and doing my morning workout around the park.

But on rainy days like this, it was perfect timing to have a joke of the second, they say the Pacific Northwest rain, gray clouds, and it's just like cold and gross. And Eugene, Oregon. The name Eugene is perfect for a place as wet and damp as the Pacific Northwest. Yeah. But hey, we love it too. It's a nice place. Yeah, yeah, I lived in Berkeley and it was so sunny. Every day it was sunny. You just felt guilty for being inside. I hate that.

Here, this is like, stay inside and play a video game. Relax, there's no need to go out, it's wet. Have fun inside. That's my speed. And when the sun comes back, then you actually do appreciate it for the rare sunny times you get. Yes, it's withholding its rays from us and they're more valuable now.

So the Sacajawea dollar, I got to be kicked out of this because at the time I was eBaying a lot of stuff using the post office a lot and at least in my neck of the woods, if you went to the post office and spent cash, you would always get Sacajawea dollars back in change, especially from the machine. Just because I feel like they're a government institution nobody else wanted these things so the post office got them and yes I would often take them to the bank to trade in for real money because nobody else wanted them people you would try to pay for things with these people be like what is this and you have to

point out like no it's real legal currency I was tired of having those conversations but I have a little info on this for you folks so the sacajawea dollar replaced the Susan B Anthony dollar introduced in the year 2000 and it is still being produced albeit in limited quantities. And thanks to the Native American One Dollar Coin Act which happened under the watch of insane leftist George W. Bush, the reverse of the coin is now updated annually with a new image celebrating contributions made by indigenous people and tribes from what's now the United States of America. And depressing thought. Can you imagine a Republican president doing that today? Not even Trump. Just like everybody is so anti-woke.

They would never recognize indigenous people for anything. In fact, they're trying, but they're probably actively now like wiping all those coins down. The reverse now is a picture of like Ronald Reagan taking a shit or something. I did see that. I didn't look into it as much, but I saw that like, wait, they still print these? And I can't believe that like in the first Trump term that this wasn't killed because you remember when Trump took over the first time the $20 bill with Harriet Tubman that he put a stop to? Yes, exactly.

Yeah. And to remind people, George W. Bush campaigned as I'm the compassionate conservative and he spoke Spanish during some of his campaign stops. He was trying to be like, I'm going to hug everybody, I'm warm and cuddly. And then 9-11 happened. Yeah, I mean, certainly we're not in the miss me yet feeling about that asshole, but it is insane. It's not speaking to the qualities of George W.

Bush, it's speaking to how much the little Mr. Overton is sliding. Insanely so, but of course well now we're supposed to like George W. Bush. Bob, he's always palling around with Obama. Did you see him? See him chuckling it up with Obama at the not just the inauguration but at Jimmy Carter's funeral? You know I'm glad they're having fun. Somebody's got to be having fun through all this. And they all they all love meeting up up with Trump as well, which is how I would think that they would greet the next Hitler, right? They'd be like, Hey, let's hang out. Let's chat. Let's welcome back. Welcome to your new home. God. Anyway, yeah, I am shocked to hear one that that dollar is still

in operation and two that it was not killed in the first Trump administration. And it's not talked about enough on Twitter or other social media. So I guess it's not a target of the anti-DEI forces currently. Yeah, and also like every other country has better dollar coins or whatever the equivalent of a dollar is. A high value coin, let's say, Japan. Unfortunately, I guess, or fortunately, I rarely use cash in Canada. So I rarely run across a Looney or a Tooney, but they're not as rare as like a 50 cent coin or a Susan B. Anthony dollar. They're used pretty frequently. Machines take them. The society was based around,

let's use these coins too. Yeah, the coins, I mean, coin money, I always heard the US Mint wants it to be done because it saves money because dollar bills wear out faster than a coin would. So if they could get people to stop using dollar bills and instead use coins, it would save money in the long run. Plus it is probably better environmentally perhaps I would bet. Yeah. But also there's this line of thinking that, oh, you know, he uses cash, homeless people and poor people and we want to keep them out. So this is not a cash store anymore.

Yeah. After lockdown, many things are cashless that I see that were not before. I, we're recording this before I go to Japan. I love their commitment to up to 500 yen a piece. Like they're very useful. But then I went to Japan and I exchanged a bunch of money beforehand and then I, then I didn't end up using it. Well, I use it out of obligation because and then I didn't end up using it.

Well, I used it out of obligation because I had already gotten it out, but I realized like, Oh God, every place takes tap. Maybe 2% of the places I've been to, which are probably like older restaurants, they were cash only. That is, I'm interested to see how that feels. I did feel like more places were taking card than ever before when I was there. Because I had always been warned or cautioned before going to Japan, be sure you have a lot of cash on you because most places are cash only. They don't take card.

Now definitely seems like lockdown and COVID made a lot of businesses in Japan switch over to using credit cards. Yeah, especially Tokyo. And I think it's all because of the Olympics. And so we then go to the commercial break on this Chuck E. Cheese token. We come back and they credit Matt Selman for pitching Bart as Amadeus as the idea. Yes, wholly based on the movie Amadeus, which Henry watched for the first time. I was going to watch it late last year. I was playing at a local theater, just a revival screening of it. But it was happening on a day I couldn't go. I've always been fascinated by this movie. And I want to see Tom Hulse in something other than The Hunchback of Notre Dame, the Disney film.

This film gave me new appreciation for him and his voice is like such a singular voice that his casting as Mozart is perfect because he does have the voice of like a young smarty pants who you like can't help but hate for being so rambunctious. Like he's, he has such a great voice and I had always avoided the film or been like, I don't need to watch it because I thought like it's a period piece and fancy outfits and very long. It seemed like the corny idea of what was Oscar bait for such a long time and I'd seen lesser because it won so many Oscars, I'd seen lesser movies that tried to copy its style and weren't as entertaining. So I just assumed Amadeus wouldn't be entertaining either.

You know, as you get older though, I feel like those dusty historical dramas have a lot of value. I do enjoy them more. I watched Topsy Turvy for the first time last year. It's like about three hours long and it's something I probably would have steered clear of as a teen, but I really got into it. The older I get the more I appreciate them and this is the same for Amadeus which I have now been told that the theatrical cut will soon be available again. It is not readily

available right now in official places so I watched the director's cut on a digital rental three hours long but it didn't feel that long. And I don't know what the extra scenes were other than one. There's one scene that I believe they cut for rating purposes because it involves a topless woman that they then cut from it. And it actually is a plot important nudity, but the film itself, the competition between F. Murray, Abraham's Sally, Ari versus Mozart's Tom Holtz. They're both very good. Like it is a hater versus the Chad. Like the Virgin and the Chad. Literally

they cast, it's another, one of many things they changed, but Sally Eyrie is a virgin in the movie and he hates the Chad Mozart. I see. Yeah as a kid and as a teen I didn't know what Amadeus was and then I realized oh it's a movie but then there's also the Rock Me Amadeus, which is not related in any way. Maybe it was capitalizing on the success of Amadeus. I'm going to say so. I think so.

But it's also funny that we have seen this. And also, I think it's one of yours, too. One of my favorite Mr. Show sketches is a long parody of Amadeus as well. The Fallusa sketch. Yeah, it's like Amadeus but it's with marching band music. It's as funny as that premise allows, which I think is very funny. Also I did not know in Amadeus that Jeffrey Jones has a major part in it. I was like, oh, that's surprising. You know what? You're gonna see a lot of Jeffrey Jones in a

lot of things and I've absorbed the Jeffrey Jones radiation I'm enough of it to be immune. Oh, yeah No, it didn't like make me turn it off But now it just is when I know I'm gonna see Jeffrey Jones and things I I am ready for like, oh, yeah There's him he sucks, you know But if I don't expect him to be playing the Emperor of Vienna, then it's a surprise Now if I could be a Jeffrey Jones apologist, no, I'm not gonna do that But I will say there there will say there is a scale, there are

degrees of things that you have done wrong and as far as I know there was no touching. Yeah I agree though you know what he narked on, well not even narked, he got Pee Wee Herman in trouble. That's true. Awful person, but there are people I don't want to see anymore. When he's on the screen I'm like like, OK, he did the thing. But anyway, on with the movie. Also, I didn't know Cynthia Nixon was in the movie either. A very young Cynthia Nixon.

Really? OK. No, she's great. Yes, I would say it's the three hours that flies right by. And also, they have amazing, the recreations of his operas are gorgeous to look at. Like Milos Forman was a great director, too. It's a very beautiful to look at. Like Milos Forman is a, it was a great director too. Like it's a, it's a very beautiful to look at film. And it really, I thought it

would feel lugubrious. Like it really is a fun watch. I had a lot of fun with it. Mainly because F. Murray Abraham is a goddamn funny guy and he is very funny. So Marge though, as she introduces Mozart, she actually seems to be doing it the pitch that the movie was, which is, oh, you think this stuff's old, huh? Because actually, Mozart was kind of a punk. It's sort of like how you sell Jesus to kids. But I do love Bart's completely giving up phrase of,

everyone who ever lived is boring. That's a great line, too, yes. No, he's some kind of giving up school guy, is what I'll call Bart. But this is where Bart is pulled into the story. Bart, what famous historical figure do you want to write about? I don't know, Boogeyman?

Come on, Bart, we can make this fun. History's like an amusement park, except instead of rides, you have dates to memorize. Mom, everyone who ever lived is boring. Boring? Is there anything boring about a bad-ass rocker who lived fast and died young? I know there's a catch, but tell me more.

As a young prodigy, this popular musician wowed audiences across 18th century Europe. And now, the star of our show, my son, Mozart. He makes Bach turn back. Haydn go into Haydn and, well, those are the only ones there have been so far. Do you like how they give up on that joke series where there's, well, there's no third joke. We're sorry.

There's no third famous person who exists yet in time. And this episode does count on, or this scene counts on Beethoven showing up at the end of it. So he can't do a joke about Beethoven. That's a surprise. Yeah, Marge sets it up like, oh he's a punk rocker because that is kind of how they they make Mozart to look in the story. Like he even has on a pink wig and in one of his earlier performances in the film he is like the bad boy of, well, music. You wouldn't call it classical music then, you'd call it music. And it happens with everything. It's this daring new kind of media that quickly becomes

lame. Like right now, nothing is lamer than rock and roll. It's the most pathetic, lame, weak sauce thing in the universe. Even weak sauce. You can't even use that anymore. Well, I think it hurts that the the youngest people who perform rock and roll on TV now are like 58. Yeah, yeah. It's everyone from the 90s, the last rock bands that were allowed to exist. I just watched a doc-umentary that was the Saturday Night Live documentary where it's only about the cowbell sketch, which was a clever idea, but they half-jokingly make it like a rock and roll doc. And of course, Dave Grohl is there as one of the talking

heads. He always is in these documentaries. I guess he's available. In his defense he has performed on Saturday Night Live with and had been introduced by Christopher Walken who appears in the cowbell sketch with the Foo Fighters. Oh right, the Foo Fighters. So yeah if you want to see old men talk about rock and roll watch that cowbell documentary because you will also see the blue oyster cult guys who are very old now arguing about who did the cowbell. I like it. But in this case, we get to see Mozart playing

the piano very well, which great animation there too, and they have to capture the crazy way that Tom Holtz plays it as Mozart in the film. Though of course he doesn't lift the piano above him like he's a playing a guitar. These are like Bugs Bunny jokes where he's playing it with his teeth, he's lifting it, he's doing crazy things, he's playing it with violins or some kind of stringed instruments. I definitely think they were pulling out Rhapsody Rabbit sheets for this one, yeah. And

Homer being his domineering father, that was the reality of Mozart. He was a child prodigy being taken all around Europe showing off this six-year-old boy who could play concertos by a controlling father. A ton of Otto because he's shouting out his requests. It's a very specific part of a movement or of a sonata. If only he had died here then it would have been the same as Willie dying in all three segments of a tree house. Maybe this is around the time where they're getting sick of Harry Shearer, so they're making him do his most painful voices like Marvin Monroe in Auto. He is, I think, only a year or two away from the first time he quits, I think, or threatens to. And they make public that, oh yeah, he,

that he literally phones this in. So Bart finishes his playing and he's told he didn't push the merchandise, which he has a Bart out of Schultzberg, was it? Bad out of Schultzberg. Bad out of Schultzberg. Like bad out of hell. And there's a joke here, if we can catalog all of these jokes, where one woman who I think is Edna Krabappel pulls her top open and shakes her breasts, but I think the joke, which is not communicated well visually, is that she's wearing a corset and her breasts really aren I think the joke, which is not communicated well visually, is that she's wearing a corset and her breasts really aren't shaking. Oh yes, yeah yeah. It's an old-timey, you're right, it is, though boy, when you say it's Edna, that makes this weirder that it's her with Bart, but old-timey underwear that the ladies wear,

the pantaloons, is a big plot point in Amadeus as well, or you'll see a lot of it in it. So that they throw their pantaloons on stage and yet by the equivalent of that era, maybe that's the equivalent of bearing your breasts is just showing your massive corset off. Though that's, when I was seeing the period dress in the film, I was like, God, how uncomfortable was it to wear those corsets? Because it seems like every fancy lady at those things have their boobs pushed up to their neck in in their outfits.

Maybe they're just doped up on whatever wasn't illegal yet. Like the lead based makeup. Yeah, yeah. And yes, Lisa is the sister Sally Salieri, who only writes boring music but is too good of a goody goody, which yeah, Salieri literally calls himself the saint of mediocrity. What he is good at is political maneuvering which you see throughout the whole movie. And then we have another very dated joke about the Jackson 5.

Yeah, why don't you go play with the other three untalented members of our family and we cut to them doing a royalty version of ABC. They're at least dancing to it. So good on Alf Clausen for coming up with a free way to use that song. And I feel like the joke's obvious enough that you would think it's the Jackson 5, but Homer names them, like even says, like blank, blank, and Tito. Yeah, this is also Dusty just making fun

of the other Jacksons who didn't make it. But this is like post-Michael disgracing himself twice, so I figure they're living the better lives at this point in 2004. I think at that time, the lesser members of the Jackson 5, you'd only hear about them because they'd be on television defending their criminal brother So we see that Bart keeps taunting Sally

Mozart can do all these things that Sally cannot and just like in the film Sally airy is praying to God of like God. Why did you not bless me? I was your greatest servant and said you give it to this gross idiot? Can't understand it, it's driving him crazy. And I also think Bart's laughter, Tom Hulson in the film has like random brain laughter that's just like he says, well it's a,

ha ha ha ha ha ha. And I think that Bart's laughter is meant to imitate that. Yeah, yeah, that's the distinctive laugh from the movie. I think it was in the trailer as well. That's the one thing that people parody, or at least that's the one reference they make, is the Tom Hulce laughter. It's the last thing you hear in the movie even. It's that memorable.

I wish I had watched it before we did Hunchback of Notre Dame because you really hear it in his Quasimodo too. He has such a great voice. He should be doing more voice acting. But hey, if you think that joke about the Jackson 5 is musty, what about jokes about award shows? Ew, a plague rat. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.

Don't you have music to write? I'm doing it right now. I call this my symphony and gee, my sister sucks. Grr. Ha ha ha ha ha ha. Oh, Lord, why did you give such transcendent I call this my symphony in G, my sister sucks. Grrr! Hehehehe. Oh Lord, why did you give such transcendent talent to such an undeserving fool? Because you are ugly! Hehehehe.

What is it about music that enchants us? The notes. Our next award is sponsored by Heinrichs Bratwurst. Papa, can we have a Heinrichs Bratwurst? For outstanding composer age 10 and under, the winner is... Mozart! Yes, I'm surprised he didn't put on a little player, a little pair of glasses to read this. Yeah, they missed an extra joke about award ceremonies so this is more of the Simpsons writing what they know which is being jealous of people winning awards they feel like they should win. Oh they have enough. You would think. Maybe by

this season, by season 15 I think they've had enough. Now they've had like 21 years worth of awards on top of that. Well they still haven't won that Oscar yet that they've been trying to get. keep trying guys. Now they need to get those shorts back into theatrical releases to even be considered. But it's far the best. They currently aren't doing that with their shorts. Bart not only wins, but he flashes his butt to the crowd. As he mentions, he's going to be performing in crack out in Amadeus as well. There's a major moment where you don't see his butt, but he does pretend to fart in a big way and direct his bottom at people. So I'm going to say that's a reference as well.

And this is where it's just too much, too much for a little Sally. And we then start to hear the beginning of the fart song, which is a little night music, though that is not an opera I have learned. It's an Allegra or it's just music to be played by itself, not as part of an opera. I like that they have Dan and Tress singing this. Is this the the Beans opera? Yeah. Whatever it is. After we see all the dandies and fops coming, which is always fun to see dandies and fops, all of these like fancy pants. I'm surprised these guys never came back, or maybe they did and I don't remember them, but they're they focus a

lot on the fop and the dandyandy the main fop and the main dandy They do unfortunately remind me of somebody who did it before was Mark McKinney and another guy in their in their bat in his Rough year on SNL. Hmm. They they played the they played those two types of fops who were they were desk characters on update Yes. Yes. I don't know. Maybe the other guy was Chris Kattan. Hmm, yeah, that sounds right. That sounds right. Yeah, we see that it's mincing room only, and the Emperor is here, this time not played by Jeffrey Jones, but by Mr. Burns. And the yawning of the Emperor is a pivotal plot point in Amadeus as well. The important point of Amadeus is that Salieri actually does win and destroys

Amadeus' life, and then does win and destroys Amadeus's life and then he regrets it. The Salieri drug the Emperor's wine in the film? In that case no, the Emperor just yawns on his own and then Salieri fans the flames for it. But why don when beans come out down south. Tooting, some call it pooting. It's air polluting. The gas comes shooting right from your butt, butt, butt, butt, butt, butt, butt, butt, butt, butt.

Ooh, this makes me want to fop till I drop. Mm, ooh, mm, yes, ooh. Mm. Mmm, ooh, mm, yes, sir, ooh. Mmm, no. Rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr Oh people bored with opera that's impossible to failure dear brother oops and it's a whole audience I think full of original characters that's falling asleep and commenting on things yeah isn't it impressive that Mike B Anderson's team not only it was told like oh Bart's gonna play piano the but also, you know, the reason it's so impressive at Amadeus is they have entire opera houses full of extras, all in period accurate costumes, often just lit by natural lighting and then full performances on stage in costume that seem period accurate

as well. And they have to imitate that on this cartoon show. Yeah, I'm looking at the frinke-ac stills of this and you think it would just be, oh, it's a bunch of Springfieldians you know in this period costume with wigs on. No, outside of like Burns and Smithers and Sideshow Mel on stage, it's all new people, all new designs. Right, not just the people in the audience but the performers too, yeah. I also like that we see when he says I'm gonna fop till I drop, fopping I guess is moving

your elbows and arms up and down from your seats. Doing the Mario. Also they they imitate it even though like the classic shot of Amadeus directing these performers from you know the podium. Those are some amazing shots in the film. It's like, that's acting. Like, that's why I bet Bradley Cooper thought he'd win an award for also playing a composer who like works really hard when he's composing and looks crazy. Yeah. That's the Netflix movie Maestro.

He really thought he was going to win an Oscar for that one. The, uh, the Leonard Bernstein one. Okay. That's what it was. Yes. That's it. I finally remembered the name of the real person he played in it. See, that's how the academy shifts, you know. Back then, in the 80s, you play a famous person well who conducts music. Everybody wants to give you an award. Now, even if you make the character gayer, it doesn't matter. It won't win you an award. Not gay enough. That's Bradley Cooper's problem, not gay enough. And yes, in the movie there's a great line where F. Murray Abraham says, as Saliari says, he's lucky the Emperor only yawned once. If he yawns three times it would close that night. Two times it'll be closed by the

end of the week. Just once, you get nine performances basically. Yeah, I need to see this movie. I didn't know the Emperor controlled the the opera industrial complex. You can see why creative people love it, not just because it is about like professional jealousy, which I'm sure you know everybody in Hollywood can identify with that, but also because Mozart's success depends far much more on what is hot and what the emperor likes and the political machinations of the access-driven journalism, I guess you'd call it at the time, instead of whether it's good or not. And so just like Mozart in the movie, this Mozart, after the failure of this, he then

falls into drinking and sadness. The way Bart is walking down the street and drinking and sad is these are like shot for shot from the movie too. And there's another appearance of Dr. Nick. It's doubling up by tripling our auto dosage and doubling our Dr. Nick dosage. They really are hitting. Yeah, you know, this could have easily been Hibbert as a bad doctor, but it is funny to hear Dr. Nick talk about using leeches, which this is not a plot point in the movie. He says, uh, eat the little boy. I love how he says

whatever way it goes, we'll know. Like, what a great way to put it. In the movie, Salieri does kind of keep nudging Mozart towards death's door here. Oh, another great line I want to point out, people bored with opera, impossible. Hey, I've never seen one, so I can't speak on it. I mean, I've seen what you call musical, like I guess Les Mis in English. Is it not an opera if it's in English? Is it just a musical? Does it have to be performed in Italian or German for it to be an opera? Hey, I've seen Evita.

That's all sung. No, no spoken dialogue in that. Does that count as an opera then? Opera experts, tell us. If you are an opera expert, up your Patreon contribution. You got to be rich, right? You probably are an annual subscriber at The Met for like thousands of dollars in New York City, so you can afford the same for us. What are we about an opera about The Simpsons without singing or costumes? We're just as good as The Met, I'd say. without singing or costumes. We're just as good as the Met, I'd say. This leads Mozart-Bart to his deathbed,

where Salieri is sort of apologizing in his final moments. Mozart, you can't die. I don't want to live in a world without the income you produce. I'll never forget when you were a little baby and I sang you the lullabies you wrote. Where is my sister? Where is darling Soli-Arie? I never wanted you to die. I just wanted to destroy your talent and your joy. Dear sister, I have a confession. In the eyes of history, I always thought your music would be judged the best.

Really? But now that I'm dying young, I'll be cool forever. Eat my panaloons! And Algeet says on the commentary, the best thing about a segment like this is the music is free. Yeah, they can have all of the music that was used in the movie and use it for free and just get their own versions of it. That includes like there so many of the major moments at the end of the movie are scored

to that choral arrangement of Mozart's music and they can just stage it the exact same with all of the same music and pay no one. And this this is pretty much how the film ends. Not just with like Mozart is buried in a cheap grave, seemingly to be forgotten forever, but his music is too great and cannot be forgotten. And meanwhile, Salieri is slowly about to be forgotten. Did he jump in a cab to the asylum or what? He gets committed in his old age to it.

He doesn't send himself to an asylum. I love how Lisa immediately goes insane after getting on it. She basically like calls for a cab, right? Yeah, it's a real win-in-roam moment because she seems normal. She hails a cab to the asylum and then as it drives away you see her through the bars raving like a loon. And credit to Mike B. Anderson's production team that they could even design an 18th century Viennese version of Crazy Cat Lady. Mm-hmm. Like it. I like it. And yeah, she's taken to the asylum, which is where Salieri really ended up. Thus ends the story. And I love that Marge is also kind of

complaining about how long the movie is, because she's like, oh, I'm glad he died now. I can, I gotta get dinner on the stove. Oh, and we have Nelson as Beethoven. Beethoven says it's a new prodigy and Burns says, as the emperor, he says, I officially declare all other music obsolete yeah no sorry I did skip over the Beethoven part I love Nelson as Beethoven is a great design and all just to set up ha ha ha ha cute cute you're right that's what drives her to it and apparently that isn't inaccurate to history that Beethoven was promoted as the next Mozart. Like he was alive at the same time as Mozart but younger, and after Mozart died they were like, where's a new prodigy out there?

And unlike Mozart, Beethoven lived through being tormented by the Animaniacs. Mozart, see, Mozart's too silly. He'd have had fun with them. He's too much of a drunk. Apparently in the movie, he is a very like uncouth guy who's talking about like bowel movements and farts and all that. And they're basing it on the reality of, at least in his letters to family, he did actually write things like, lick my ass. Wow, wow. He was like the Howard Stern of classical music composers. He really was a bad boy. The marketing was true.

All the candlelight by the deathbed, that was them imitating all the candlelight lighting in the film too, which is very impressive the more you know about the technical aspects of lighting a scene with candles. So yes, he's dead. Salieri is crazy. Mozart will be remembered forever. And so we wrap it up and Marge is happy for it, but this is when Lisa has to be a pedant one more time.

And thanks to this, she saves me a lot of trouble of having to explain the ways that the film is inaccurate. Can you, can you, can you? Ah! No! Ah! Ah! And that's the life of Mozart.

Thank God he died young. I've got to get dinner on the stove. Mom, this sounds a lot like the movie Amadeus, which was historically inaccurate. Mozart worked hard on his music. Salieri was a respected composer. All I know is the guy who played Mozart was also an animal house.

Now there's a movie with good music. Animal house, house, house. Nobody ever went to class. Then we saw Donald Sutherland's ass. Animal house, house, house. Animal house, house, house. Then they did the end like American graffiti. Well, you found out what happened to everyone!

The ending is just a shrug. I think I like the ending of Tales from the Pelopon Domain better because they just dance to the Ghostbusters song. It's a sequel ending to it, except this time, yeah, it's, I think they had a little more energy for the Ghostbusters song. And it feels like it just kind of empty to hear Only Homer singing over these pictures of people with text on the screen. And I'm thinking, could they not get the music or did they not want to use the music, at least the backing track, you know?

Here's my read on it. When Homer says that movie had good music, instead of using Louie Louie like they did in the previous time they parodied the Animal House, well, one of the previous times they parodied the Animal House ending, this time they actually did pick like the worst song on the Animal House soundtrack that like was originally written for it. I give a listen to the here's the real song. I have about 20 seconds of it here. I guess this started the trend of the movie ending song that explains the movie to you? Yeah, it is going over all of the plot points just like Homer did, except not talking about

Donald Southerns ass, which you do see in Animal House. My favorite one of these is the Ghostbusters 2 end credits song where they just recap the movie via rap, or Bobby Brown does. Though, you know, Will Smith did several good ones of those too. True, true. This gag about Animal House is just the connective tissue of the actor and also Al Jean is a big fan of Animal House Which makes sense because he he went to Harvard just a few years after Animal House is written by Harvard graduates about college life

But yeah, Lisa is doing most of the work for us here of pointing out the inaccuracies in the film one other one They skipped over that Sally Harry actually did marry and have children. He was not a man committed to chastity. Though I've heard this was the best defense and there's multiple articles you can find. There was a good BBC article on like all the other things Amadeus gets wrong and the stuff they make up. Definitely Salieri did not kill him as the film implies.

Well, I want to comment on one of these recap things we see at the end, or epilogue, if you will, not a recap thing. There is Lisa Sacajawea. The text is, Sacajawea went on to great riches posing for butter boxes. And we see Lisa in the classic Lando Lakes Native American woman pose. And I found out that Lando Lakes phased out Mia, the indigenous woman, in 2020. So with a pair of scissors you can no longer make her knees into boobs. Oh, I learned that trick from the Beavis and Butthead book.

Me too, me too, and I did it. I didn't know they phased her out. I am assuming why. Well, I would guess that should be on the list of things that Trump is gonna fix. Oh, he better. I mean, I think it was because of police violence, we're changing Dr. Hibbert's voice and then we're erasing the Land O'Lakes girl and that's it. Yeah. That's all you get. Again, I said it before, but like making those more sensitive choices is like a positive

thing and good. People were protesting to have cops stop getting away with murder. Like that's what people wanted and that hasn't changed at all. I think they'd be fine if there were fewer murders and the Land O'Lakes lady still existed. I would trade that for it. You could have all the land, but hey, I guess it's not my place to say that.

Once we eliminate the murders, then we can work on the mascots. Murders before mascots is what I say. Bob Mackie. I will say one more thing that Milos Forman, I think, said, or the writer of Amadeus. His defense was of all of like the changes and why it was inaccurate that it's technically an unreliable narrator in the film because it's all elderly Salieri telling this story in a sanitarium.

So he's like well if it's inaccurate maybe it's because a crazy guy was telling the story. So he's like, well, if it's inaccurate, maybe it's because a crazy guy was telling the story. Well, that's doesn't that solve everything? Yes. Yeah. And a nice little package. And last bit I liked on the commentary was when they're dunking on how many comedies, how every comedy had to have copy the Animal House style credits. Matt Selman takes credit for one of those ignoble copy. Yes, I guess he wrote the epilogue text for Deuce Bigalow Male Gigolo. Which would fit in that timeline because as we learned from doing 8 Crazy Nights, he did uncredited rewrites on 8 Crazy Nights, which is why a character who has three

breasts in it is named Miss Selman. Yeah, that's right. So I guess he was, he's doing some moonlighting, let's say. There's tons of great facts you can learn from that. A Crazy Night's What a Cartoon History. It's not just us saying it, it's a dumb movie. We find other things to say. I like that Matt Selman can at least admit like, well, you guys are making fun of it.

You know, I did the one for Deuce Bigelow, American Gigolo. I do like the ending just a little bit in that I think they make it worse by having Homer have no backing track So they they increase how ugly and bad of a animal house song Yeah, and in general I like the the shrugs out of these episodes But I prefer just hearing Ghostbusters out of nowhere and have the characters just dance as an animated gif until the credits fade to black And instead of making you listen to more of Animal House over the credits,

you instead get to hear Mozart, a more beautiful bit of music than Animal House. It plays all through the credits and it's not Alclos and lazily doesn't like re-orchestrate Mozart to sound like The Simpsons. It's instead just the music. Yeah, it's nice. It's nice to hear. It is a classy way to take us out. But you know, I said it before, I like this one more than public domain. I think tall tales in Bible stories, I think I like more, but I like this more than tales from the public domain personally. I like this more because even though it's fast and loose with history, it does feel

like a little nerdier. They spend a little more time on it to get some of these details correct. And I feel like it just so packed with jokes that I could ignore the four or five street jokes that are in here that are just a fill-like filler. Yeah, I remember not liking this outside of the second Jowia coin joke when I was a young boy of 21. But now I think it's very funny. And great casting on all of the characters in their lead roles, especially Lenny and

Carl. It's good to see Lenny and Carl drive a segment. It took 15 years. Will it be another 15 before? Well, I guess we get a Carl-focused episode within the next decade of this, where they go to Iceland. That's true. It took that much longer before we were ready. But yeah, thank you for listening, everybody. This has been Talking Simpsons. If you want to support the show and get all the episodes ad-free and also one week at a a time go to patreon.com slash Talking Simpsons and sign up for just five bucks a month and that five bucks a month also gets you regular access to our vast catalog of

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also poisonous. I'll tell you what's poisonous, your attitude. Mmm. You know the- Whoa! Gah! Ooh, I'm dying. But at least people will always remember the expedition of Lewis and Clark and Tweedleburger.

Gah!