Talking Simpsons - Talking Simpsons - Rosebud

Episode Date: March 8, 2017

We hope you watched Citizen Kane recently, because this episode is chockful of references to the iconic film. But also in this bearish ‘sode with special appearances by The Ramones and one of our most repeated lines of a single word. Give it a watch…

this episode of talking simpsons is brought to you by bark box and you find folks can go to get bark box.com slash laser time and get a free month's worth of stuff for your dog i heartily endorse this event or product. Ahoy, hoy, everybody, and welcome to Talking Simpsons, home of the head bag. I am your host, beer-swilling tube jockey Bob Mackie, and this is the Lazer Time Podcast Network's chronological exploration of the Simpsons. Who is here with me today? Ah, carbon blob Chris Antista. Quiet, Carbon Blob, Chris Antistam. Quiet, you awful man!

It's Henry Gilbert, hello. And today's episode is The Immortal Rosebud. Yes. Mr. Burns, one of his finest quotes was just, Yes. We'll get to it. It's like a well-animated Terrence and Phillip Canadian South Park character. It's an a well-animated Terrence and Phillip Canadian South Park character.

It's an unhinged head. His jaw dropping. And this episode aired on October 21st, 1993, and Chris will tell us what happened on this mythical day in real-world history. I better not believe it. Having sold 10 million copies since late September, Disney can't keep Aladdin VHSes on store shelves,

Blind Melon tops the rock charts with no rain, Fox officially pulls the plug on the Chevy Chase show and Nirvana announces their MTV Unplugged appearance which would turn out to be their final album. That was one of my first cassette tapes, I think. Nirvana Unplugged. I bought the CD, transferred it on a tape,

broke my headphones in half, ran both sides through my flannel shirt and would put my head on my desk in high school and listen to it to not learn anything and be sullen and morose sad and pubescent you're teaching me math i'm listening to lake of fire yeah this is a david bowie song uh see i was gonna make a joke it was four years before i realized man who sold the world was not a song by nirvana he says it in the song i wasn't listening it taught me all about the meat puppets which i think all kids need to know about at age 11

though he surely was not unplugged in that part like that's true somebody gave me shit on a recent episode of talking simpsons because i don't know where we are with howard stern but the idea that like i didn't i said that nobody was rooting for the Chevy Chase show to fail in that I wasn't listening to Stern, who apparently was, and was pranking him real hard, but that the whole world was like, oh, Chevy Chase is a talk show. That should be nice.

And then if you've ever watched the first episode, it is a train wreck beyond belief. And it's a horrible man not trying. It's like, oh, you know this guy who's not good with people in any way? Let's make him a talk show host. Wait, let's not do that. But I It's like, oh, you know this guy who's not good with people in any way? Let's make him a talk show host. Wait, let's not do that. But I didn't.

I remember. I like this guy from these movies. I don't remember. I don't remember the trades being like, this show is destined to fail before we see it. And everybody thought it would be okay. What a great choice. And both of those bands you mentioned, like, both of their lead singers would be dead very soon. Shannon Hoon.

Why am I on a great band, though? Great pot smoking band. So, we are now in the first production episode of season 5. We have to blame Conan for this being a Mr. Burns-focused episode, because he's still on the show. He did not write this. This is a John Swartzwelder episode. This episode feels more

Conan than, like, episodes of his show from the last 10 years. I mean, Conan was leaving. He left with Homer Goes to College, correct? Yeah, but this is production one. Exactly. That was production two, so he would have been in a rewrite room. My theory is these are so Burns-focused, these first two, because he was leaving the show. I want to write as many Burns things as I can before I leave.

Bear Robots has Conan written all over it. It really does. No bear wants to live. Schwarzwalder is a big wacko too, though. That's true. John Schwarzwalder is an amazing dude. As Oakley talked about in our interview, I feel like I'll mention that every podcast from now on.

It's great. But as he mentioned in there that Schwarzwalder and then Oakley and weinstein together they were just handed like five scripts which is way like that's two more than you normally do in a season that's basically half the season taken care of by three people yeah and so they're just sent to a corner to write and that's what schwarzwelder did and so i could see him just handing in that script and then they take their hands to it and Conan including. And I think too that because this is their first production one that they

wanted to stay in a safety zone of Burns. They knew Burns so well and this is so many Burns-y things. It is very close to the Burns we know in other episodes too. And we saw another Citizen Kane focused episode with two cars in every garage, three eyes

on every fish. I hate saying that title. I always screw it up. Industry Car Named March is a nice Jedediah Leland reference. But this is the most Kane in a row. The first four minutes are Citizen Kane. Every scene they didn't do in that season two episode, they do in this one.

I've got to get this out of the way. One, when we're recording this, it's Oscar time. We have laser time TV and I managed to find a copy of Citizen Kane. We can broadcast for free for everyone to watch anytime they wanted. So a bunch of us in the Lazer Time community watched it live the other night. The next night, I did the recordings for this episode. So I'm in full Kane Simpson. You don't have to have seen Citizen Kane to like this episode.

No, I loved it as a kid and I didn't see the movie until I was maybe 19. You are missing out on a ton of, like, and it's not just like a reference in like Arrested Development. It's like someone had to draw specific scenes that you, like you will be rewarded for watching Citizen Kane. They put in their VHS tape and they framed all of it. And this was a total accident. So like one night I'm watching Citizen Kane and the next night I'm watching this episode. You've heard me say one of my goals is to buy a Simpsons animation cell. Yes.

And about one weekend a month I go and look around and I bookmark shit on eBay. And I don't think about it that much or go back ever. It's like, oh, it's Marge's arm. And then I remember the one I bookmarked was a Citizen Kane reference from this episode. Oh, cool. While I'm drinking and preparing the show and alone and sad. So I was like, I'm going to pull

the trigger on this. I'm going to buy a Simpsons animation cell right now. I don't care that much about the price. It's $300 and Bob and Henry haven't been paid for anything. I can't really justify that. Says I.

So as of this moment I have sent an offer to this might be nice person. I've never done the make an offer thing to eBay. What is this still? The still and this is what's really great

to me because I showed it to Dave and Dave's really good with The Simpsons if you haven't seen it. He's like, I don't remember that scene and it's because the scene is panning wildly all over it. And the scene is the robot bear attacking Burns as Smithers breaks a chair on him none of which is in frame at the same time.

Oh wow. That's a great scene, by the way. It's $300, and it's $279. And I'm like, I'm so in love with all this shit right now. I'll give you $200. No questions asked. Did you type in hick? And he sent me a counteroffer of, I'll give it to you for $278.

And I'm like, man. Hard ball. Real hard ball. This is kind of damage, too. But, uh, I don't know. I didn't think my first Simpsons animation show would be Smithers and Burns. So, like, come on. I don't know. Play with me a little bit here. So, we'll find out at the end of the episode whether I should

run. I think if I do it, I have to give you guys half of whatever we get off Patreon. Cut me Smithers out of the cell and I'll just take him up somewhere. That's like the thing I do. That is my fucking sideways drinking the wine at the chicken store. At the chicken shop. Me cutting up an animation cell, Bob. That is so grotesque to me.

You're destroying history. That is my current anecdote with this. By the time you hear it, the auction will be over. You can't have stolen it to me. You're destroying history. That is my current anecdote with this. By the time you hear it, the auction will be over. You can't have stolen it from me. That's the only thing I was worried about. Someone waving at my face. I bought it, man. Fuck you.

I crushed Chris's dreams. So they did a ton of Citizen Kane references. I think that's also why they're staying in their wheelhouse. The opening is all of the opening of citizen kane yeah it is the rise up to through the gate that is telling you to keep out it is then him in his deathbed but he doesn't cut to his dream sequence of him as a kid singing union forever all right that that is slightly later it what i don't know this is too specific to us we just did our laser time oscar special and whenever we write we we write sketches for every best picture nominee Slightly later. I don't know. This is too specific to us. We just did our later time Oscar special

and whenever we write, we write sketches for every Best Picture nominee. And then Michael is always like, I always say Michael's sketches are insane in that they like, they'll leave scenes. Like SNL doesn't move

from one room, but Michael will transcend time and characters. And this to me seems like if this movie were nominated this year, this is the sketch Michael would have written.

The opening of it. And it's, because like if this movie were nominated this year, this is the sketch Michael would have written. The opening of it. Because like seriously, if you haven't seen Citizen Kane, you won't get half of this shit. Yeah, you need to. Just please do it. I know it feels like homework or whatever. It's so much fun. It moves really fast. It's an amazing film. I think as a kid, I had seen the Tiny Toons episode, which was an entire Citizen Kane

parody. Oh my god. And I think it was even animated in black and white yes i mean made for no child obviously i need to watch that again yeah yeah we also played it on the on laser time tv and how about when this episode airs the next day that would be wednesday or thursday thursday which is it air well this goes up wednesday morning yeah so thursday at 8 p.m will air citizen kane on Lazer Time TV, 8 p.m. wherever you are or wherever you're watching. In addition to that, the Simpsons Citizen Kane sizzle reel of where they were parodying things from.

I'll do that for everybody. Again, we don't make any money on LTTV. It's just this fun thing. I love being able to show everybody Citizen Kane. Just program and network. Like Weird Al on UHF. I'm not going to say it again. Spoilers for Tiny Toons.

Montana Max was not saying Acme. He was saying Acne because he had a case of the zits according to his own words. That was the episode. They also did one that was Sunset Boulevard. But instead of being dead in a gutter he was dead in a gutter. It was called Sepulveda Boulevard.

Oh, my God. That is so specific. I forgot that. To L.A., right? Yeah. I have to re-watch. I got to re-watch this. When we did that on 302010, there was an episode of Pinky and the Brain that was a remake of The Third Man.

Oh, you're right. And I got you guys the clip of the exact speech from both of them. It's insane. It's insane how well... And that's what we made a little dumb little channel for. We can find these old cartoons and play them in their entirety, which you can't even buy on DVD anymore. It's just a shame.

But it was weird to see in the middle of the Kane intro that they then have a Wizard of Oz joke. Like the, oh wee, oh wee, oh. I didn't catch that part of it. But I mean, it's more of a You're right, but that's the open up Citizen Kane with the shot of Xanadu. Xanadu! Xanadu!

Charles Foster Kane. Price, no man can say. They move right into like his past. Immediately, and like, Mr. Hatcher in the opening is like the shadowy figure in a limousine. That's right, yeah. And I always thought it was weird. I never thought about it until having seen Sheldon Kane a billion times.

Why is he a shadowy figure in this? Let's just play the clip. I'm sorry. Tra-la-la-la-la, tra-la-la-la-la. I am the happiest boy there is. Aren't I, Bobo? Mmm. Happy!

Come here, Happy. Yes, Momsy? Happy, would you like to continue living with us, your loving natural parents? Or would you rather live with this twisted, loveless billionaire? Let's roll. Wait, you forgot your bear, a symbol of your lost youth and innocence. Oh, well, at least we still have his little brother, George.

Bum, bum, bum, bum. Oh, the sun shines bright on my old Kentucky home. Bum, bum, bum, bum. Trust me, it'll be funny when I'm an old man. I really like how they explain the point of the movie in the first scene of this show. It reminds me so much of a Michael sketch that he's making fun of. That's the thesis of the film, being shouted by the character. I think Michael learned it from this.

Things like this. And also naming the episode Rosebud is great, too. But the character's name is Walter Parks Thatcher. That was the stint. He's just like, Oh, you're a good little boy. I remember at the time. What would you like to have been? Okay, this is me projecting when I'm younger and a giant Citizen Kane fan.

A wayfish, orphan, poor kid being adopted by a billionaire makes as little sense to me now as someone who watched Citizen Kane yesterday. I don't get it, but that is how... It doesn't make sense if you've never seen Citizen Kane. A boy is adopted by a billionaire,

literally adopted by a corporation, and taken away from his family. Put into the bank to keep him from being beaten by his father. So you can't be that human. That's right. God. She has her motivation, but how did people... Is this something people did in the turn of the century?

I think back then it was just like, you're a ward of the corporation now. That's what they say. Exactly. I mean, in 1900, what laws even were there? If you were a billionaire in 1903, you did whatever you felt like. You get the wire mother this week. Give it a couple weeks. I'm sure they'll have those same rights soon.

So do we need to explain who George Burns is? I don't know if the kids know about the George Burns. Famously old and horny in the 80s. Yeah. And TCM was playing their Oscar marathon all throughout February. And I really forgot that John

Denver's Oh God won a goddamn Oscar because it's ridiculous. It's a ridiculous film. Weren't there several Oh God movies? There are three. There's an Oh God trilogy where George Burns

plays God and the third one the devil as well. That's right. Oh God you devil. I think that was sort of the novelty. He was one of the most

in a much smaller world he was one of the most recognizable celebrities from radio. Yeah. So Burns Burns got his start in vaudeville alongside all those guys like jack benny the marx brothers milton burl comedy team with but he was a comedy

team with his wife gracie allen and they are burns and allen that's where they were famous and gracie films is named after gracie allen i think i think you're right yeah so but i i discovered those much after i knew him as just he's that old guy. But that is why he was cast in Oh God. He's this guy, this celebrity everybody recognizes and has a very distinct look. He always has a cigar, giant glasses. So he didn't have that look in the 50s. No, he was not an aging chimp in the 50s.

But Burns and Allen was just funny. And they were a funny duo of now, obviously, it's a problematic fave, but it's that his wife is an idiot. But she's so funny as an idiot, and he's having to, like, fix her mess-ups. Yeah, the line. And they're bouncing off each other. I was reading something about it, that it is bizarre that they were a comedy team for so long, and she died relatively early. And he didn't really go on to write or be a traditional comic anymore. He was famous for being George Burns.

He was professionally George Burns. He was professionally George Burns. I think the line that went out on, he would say, say goodnight Gracie and she would say, goodnight Gracie. Goodnight Gracie.

Yeah, so we've heard that before reused on Tiny Toons and other things like that. It's so cute. And George Burns lived to a fucking hundred for some reason. He lived till 1996. He Bob hoped it. I remember

on a 30, 20, 10, and 86, it was like his 90th birthday. Televised for everyone. And they were all like, well, you're going to be dead soon, right? But every, almost everyone wishing him a happy birthday, he outlived. That's crazy. But yeah, he was

the joke there is just like, oh, it's funny because i'm an old man yeah if you want to see him really good in something kind of acting it's the film version of the neil simon play the sunshine boys oh yeah walter matthau as kind of well walter matthau is acting but george burns is playing a version of himself who just is the old man who, him and his old vaudeville buddy, everybody loved him and then they broke up and now they want them to get back together, but they can't stop arguing. It's a couple of old Jews arguing. Neil Simon, of course. Two grumpy Jewish men. What is that you say?

Walter Matthau being the original impression of Homer Simpson by Dan Kessler. That's true. And we have another, maybe the final, Sheriff Lobo joke in this episode. I didn't know he knew who Lobo is. That's wrong. Sheriff Lobo. Lobo. Okay,

reference here. Bedpans under my pillow. Who's Bobo, sir? Bobo? I meant Lobo. Sheriff Lobo. They never should have canceled that show. I see.

On another topic, the preparations for your birthday have begun. I won't get what I really want. No one does. Happy birthday, Mr. Smithers. His satisfaction. He's coming, I think, it sounds like. And that's a reference to Marilyn Monroe singing happy birthday to John F. Kennedy, right? That is correct.

What were the circumstances behind that? Right before or after they fucked. Okay. I think they were fucking. He was president, and it was just like, you're wishing the president birthday. It isn't a gala, but it is also just the sleaziest wink of like, we're fucking. Yeah. Anybody else would have been labeled disrespectful.

I am a fucking her. The public is perfectly fine with me committing extramarital affairs. We've agreed I'm too attractive to hold this job. We got to focus on it. But not to harp on this, but if you haven't seen Citizen Kane, the throwaway joke

of that Burns is reaching in a surplus box of snow globes. Are they Nevar break snow globes? Yeah, it's a joke. Snow globe is an undercutting to the final reveal of the film.

It's this close. It's the penultimate reveal of the film, the snow globe. Yeah, you can see it right there. And it's just amazing. It's a joke youimate reveal of the film, the snow globe. Yeah, you can see it right there. And it's just amazing. It's a joke you won't really understand unless you know Citizen Kane.

And the work they put into having Smithers reflected in that snow globe just like the nurse was when she comes into the room to see that Kane is dead. Watch Citizen Kane! Yeah, we said it before on that previous episode. You must watch it. So Homer also misses Sheriff Lobo, am I correct? Lobo. Lobo.

Bring back Sheriff Lobo. Lobo. Lobo. What, homie? Oh, no. Burns' birthday. What's wrong? Every time Mr. Burns has a birthday, all his employees have to help out at the party.

And I always get some terrible job. I love Sheriff Lobo being like what Duckman is to Lazer Time. This thing we can't stop bringing up. But it's good. Sheriff Lobo is not good. I don't know if they actually loved it

or think it's the silliest idea for a show ever. They think it's a show a dumb man like Homer would watch. If you want to hear us explain and talk about Sheriff Lobo and play the theme, we do that in Marge and Shane's episode. So listen to that one. And then no one would lovingly remember Lobo. Yeah. I meant to mention the family genealogy of the Burns family is kind of messed up because obviously we saw an older burns than this version of burns who worked went with his grandfather to the atom smasher factory so furthermore but furthermore uh george burns's

age yes gives burns an age range which has been at the turn of like the two centuries ago in certain i would make him older than george burn it literally solidifies it like this was 1902 yes that's yeah but that burns is uh i mean you could say burns just misremembers it because his brain doesn't work so you can't count on his flashback in the in springfield or no in a last exit to springfield that's right yeah you can't count on his memories there so fine but uh but it doesn't fit and then meanwhile he's got larry burns hanging around there somewhere uh they were larry burns was conceived after a screening of gone with the wind so we can we can trace it to that that period yes but homer is markedly less crazy than he was in the car he

really is yeah for sure this is the homer season like this is yeah this for sure. This is the Homer season. This is when Homer became the star of the show. Cape Fear is a great end to the Bart era, really. Dude. Bart would be the lead in other episodes. It's not to say he never was again, but this is the season where Homer is the star. And Bart is really the focus of Cape Fear. Homer's just window dressing, basically. Here's a fun joke with Homer, and now back to Bart.

But you can see him being the culprit. He's capable of the funniest jokes, because he can be a lot weirder than Bart. Yeah, and they back to Bart. But you can see him being the culprit of like, he's capable of the funniest jokes because he can be a lot weirder than Bart. Yeah, and they have more confidence. There's no Bart B story in either of these first production five ones. Yeah. I actually remember that being a little jarring. As a kid who wanted to say cowabunga like Bart. But it also kept my dad

watching. Like, hey kid, we're watching The Simpsons. Throw your homework away. We're doing The Simpsons time. Right in the fire. This only reminds me that Homer has to do a job. Do you remember the episode you talked about, the Seth MacFarlane incident of him having a birthday party? I don't remember what episode we talked about that on. You think that's bad. But he had his employees come to a birthday party where he literally sang to them.

Yeah, this was a story I'd heard writer, podcaster hayes davenport say that he wrote on he wrote on family guy it was seth mcfarland's 40th birthday he said he never met uh seth mcfarland the entire time he wrote for family guy for a season but on his 40th birthday he was like i'm having a big party now come to this big theater i rented out i flew in a big man from the States. I'm going to sing songs. Two hours. And he was just like, yeah, it sounds like Hal. Good Lord. That is very Birdsy, isn't it?

That's what all this reminded me of, because Homer is discovered as the funny person, but only because he left coat hangers in his clothing. Yes, and his shirt and his pants. Yeah, Burns and Smithers mistake him for a comedic force. That man who's getting all those laughs, Smithers, who is he? Homer Simpson, sir. One of the carbon blobs from Sector 7G.

But I don't think that... I want this Simpson fellow to perform comedy at my party. I must harness his fractured take on modern life. Fine, sir. I'll get him started on some snappy Sinbad-esque material. Sinbad.esque material. Sinbad.

Boy, that animation didn't look out of place. Not at all. And Smithers did not help Homer at all, obviously, with his material. I mean, Sinbad-esque material. Actually, that line makes it even weirder. You ever come home late on a Thursday night? Oh, boy. Women be shopping.

Women be shopping. Screaming. We need the toilet seat up to show you we didn't pee on it. I love Sid. That might be an actual Sid Bad joke. I did until he fucking jilted the Steven Universe crew. I don't know what happened. I wonder if he just got too...

I don't know. He can't be too busy. It's literally impossible. He's not busy enough to tell people he was not in Shazam or whatever the hell. That's what I love. Zoe Quinn, Twitter superstar and game maker Zoe Quinn, she tweeted about how go to Sinbad's feed because it's all him just telling different jerks like, no, you remember the wrong movie.

I know what movie I was in. On Lazer Time, we uncovered the culprit behind that. What, Mandela Syndrome? Jesus, I forget even which episode. I thought it was casual racism, but it's just me. No, it's because first kid ran before Kazooie. And if you're impressionable, done with a bad memory. And don't do the research.

Cracks fingers. How can you not remember the star of a movie about a rapping genie that lives in a boom box? I mean, come on. They only made one of those. Both stupid, forgettable, and movies Hollywood had to make in order to keep being Hollywood in the 1990s. And I think Sinbad should have been in Kazam. It would have been a better movie. Now, I've got to give my love for Shaq here.

Shaq is not an entertainer. Yeah, but he's awesome, hilarious, and he's... I love Shaq so much. What? Has Shaq done anything bad? No. No, he's like the only person who's been famous for 30 years. He lives his life. He's awesome.

He can laugh at himself all the time. Shaq rules. He's not like a self-serious asshole like Kobe Bryant. I do like Shaq a lot, yeah. Maybe he'll be at WrestleMania 33 wrestling the big show. I can't wait to see it. Though, Smithers saying that Sinbad line like that he's going to help him right it does within the world of the show it is weird that Smithers let Homer go up there to say whatever he wanted yeah instead of editing

which is why that line is obviously written way after the fact like you said as we'll see Smithers is just an awful emcee yes period but Period. But a hit prepping for the roast. Yeah. Now I'm not saying Mr. Burns is incontinent. Incontinent. Too rich. Does either of you know what incontinent means? Lisa, don't spoil our fun.

Come on, dear. It's time to go. Okay, stupid. Homer, you've got to stop insulting everyone, especially your boss. Marge, the comedy roast is an American tradition. It's what gives us the freedom to criticize our social betters. Hey, Flanders, you smell like manure. Uh-oh, better cancel that dinner party tonight.

Thanks for the nose news, neighbor. So in Homer Goes to College, Homer was misled into thinking college was like a college boob comedy movie. In this episode, he apparently loves the Friars Club roast, like the Dean Martin roast of the 70s. And he thinks that's what he's supposed to do. Not just give a comedy bit or whatever. Deliver a comedy bit. Would it surprise you that I've been watching the Dean Martin roast on YouTube? Those are amazing.

They're amazing, but they're... They're horrible, too. No, no, but they're horrible because they're not that funny because they're not as mean as what we associate no because it's pg television yeah but like you can watch like the unedited tape like a lot of that shit has been you can see time codes underneath it it's not it's not as mean as you'd think it'd be now i hear the jokes i remember one from it very well that they had on they would just have her in character the woman from laughing who was the who would play the old lady who would hit a guy with a bag who would sit next oh yeah she would just be there for them to make mean women jokes and are like

you're ugly like those are the jokes that's canonical with the current roast so that yeah that's why they invite ann coulter to those things, which, man, I got to say, I never want to see her nowhere, but them telling her to kill herself was the greatest thing ever. But anyway, so the joke was... What did you all say? As a feminist, I'm disgusted by what I've heard on stage, but as someone who hates Ann Coulter, I'm delighted. But so the joke I remember is that she says to Frank Sinatra, gave away my hope chest and he says i seen your chest ain't got no hope baby yeah boom but uh there are there are friars clubs uh jackets but homer's wearing this like golfing jacket or something well he's holding a golf club like

bob hope i see okay bob hope with putter but yes and Homer. Well, Homer would think that 1950s comedy is the height of comedy. Yes. Obviously. Or I guess, no. 50s comedy then dressed up for the 70s, which is the Bob Hope he is doing. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. And as a kid, I didn't know what incontinent meant either.

It made me question whether I thought it was someone who can't control his pee. Yeah, no. Am I correct? Poop. I think it is poop. I thought it was pee. No, it means you shit too much. Somebody here doesn't know what

incontinent means means leaves us right. I know it at least means you can't control some sort of waste process. It's how they sell the pens. Which is, by the way, what people accuse me of wearing when on the video game podcast, I don't love a Halo game. Okay, the incontinence

definition is the first that according to miriam webster you know somebody's doing great in a debate when they have to go like in the dictionary definition webster defines the the quality or state of being continent failure to restrain sexual appetite i see weird and inability oh here's the one inability of the body to control the evacuated functions of urination or defecation. Either one. Wow. We were both right and wrong.

Poo-poo and pee-pee. Yes. But is poo-poo one word or two? You should look that up. Oh, he's making incontinence jokes. He threw his pencil like there was no other. We should throw a card behind him. We need a glass shattering noise.

I have to pause and point out this is the greatest show of all time. Talking Simpsons. If you're listening to anything else, this is the greatest thing I've ever been involved in. Take that, other popular podcasts. We're coming for you. Suck a dick, comedy bang bang. Tell me how my ass tastes, Marc Maron.

The Simpsons will be right back. You see, our new Net Zero Hub has all you need to know about smart meter plans, EV tariffs, solar panels, and much more. Making your usage clearer, your trips greener, your home cozier, and your world brighter. Find our Net Zero Hub at electricireland.ie. Hey there, lovely listener. You got a dog in your life that you want to spoil i wish i did but i live in the city and it's impossible but if that's not the case for you know that this episode is brought to you by bark box and if you go to get bark box.com slash laser time you can try a free month for yourself what is bark box well it's a service that's committed to making dogs happy through delivering four to six natural treats and super fun toys, usually curated around a surprise theme each month,

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items in a bark box are wheat corn and soy free so you should rest a little easier give yourself or your pup the joy of a million belly scratches and give bark box a shot and again you listeners can get one month free of bark box by going to getbarkbox.com slash Lasertime. You like Lasertime shows? Then you might like Bonus Time, Lasertime's weekly bonus show exclusively on Patreon.com slash Lasertime. Here's a taste of what you've been missing. I had two dope tweets that I didn't put out.

I discarded them in my drafts folder because they are not tweetable from my account. One was, I challenge you to prove Jimmy Buffett didn't write a song called Horny Burrito.

The other one was, did you know Bill Paxton is the only actor killed by a predator, a terminator, and an alien, and a qualified surgeon? Oh. I was about to get on you for using that cliche because everyone made that tweet, but then, yeah.

Can you see why it didn't go out? But we do it behind the paywall. We're all friends here. That's good. Pour some of this beer out onto your carpet for me. That man's played a large role in my life Get bonus time, Laser Time's weekly full-length, uncensored, and ad-free

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bored again but mixing back for two two for two in season five no one term is. You too, huh? Hey, I know a good yogurt place. Get away from me, loser. More of the Simpsons hating Jimmy Carter. Yeah, but it's a Schwarzwalder episode. Yeah.

Well, they're more making fun of H.W. as well. It's just they're both losers. It's been a while since we've had a one-term president. Let's hope. But yeah, it's been a while since we've had a one-term president crossing our fingers let's hope let's hope but uh but yeah it's it's been a while now there i don't think there are any no jimmy carter is the only living one-termer now oh but there's a better reason to play the death jingle there's so many deaths how many jingles do we need to play here? Three? Two.

Two. Marky's still in here. Happy birthday to you! Go to hell, you old bastard. Hey, I think they liked us. Have the Rolling Stones killed? Sir, those aren't... Do as I say. The fucking Ramones.

I cannot believe how quickly we lost lost oh like well i mean look they were taking care of themselves yeah but just but joey and johnny they're like my dad is older than the fucking ramones yeah it's true uh so the ramones in case you don't know were a formative punk rock band in america like they predate the sex pistols and they they are everybody they are celebrated beloved for a reason. All their songs sound exactly the same. Not all of them. One of my favorite jokes from Evan Dorkin

That's from Bonzo? One of my favorite comic strips from Evan Dorkin Name that Ramones tune. And the team wrote Name that tune. And it's like, okay, I can name it in 56 notes. But I love the Ramones. But the joke was that it was deconstructing what made music good and the idea that like it's very easy to write a pop a pop song and

the ramones found a really good way to do that in two minutes with with power chords all the way yeah it's beautiful and after they sing that song i love the the brief shot we see of burns just like shivering he's shattered But they also had... And the fucking riot control beating up people in the audience. Just beating women and... God, terrible. So the joke, though... Not the joke, but the...

They had to do the same thing they did with Aerosmith. Everyone had to get one line. I think they liked us as the drummers. That is Marky Ramone. Marky Ramone, still with us. Marky Ramone, who was like the third drummer. I only know Marky Ramone because Marky Ramone, still with us. Marky Ramone, who was like the third drummer. I only know Marky Ramone because he actually became like a joke character on the best show, radio show. Like somebody would, the Josh Worcester would always call in as Marky Ramone.

And they all are related. I'm the greatest Ramone. No, they're all related as Ramones. Yeah. No, they're not. God damn it, Chris. No, they're not. They really are. I don't know anything about the Ramones. But Joey and Johnny are. Yes. But they're all related as Ramones. Yeah. No, they're not. God damn it, Chris. No, they really are.

I don't know anything about the Ramones. But Joey and Johnny are. Yes. But they're the dead ones. All the dead real last name Ramones are dead. Yeah. But I love the camera pans and the great angles and cutting in this. And they paid for Happy Birthday.

Yeah. They paid for Happy Birthday. But in terms of animating, like I was a big punk rock fan around this time. Animating a punk rock band, good job. Yeah, very good. Their stances are great. That's how the Ramones play. And when he says to you and he like twists his finger into the camera, it's so great.

And one thing I want to point out is that there is a caricature of Mr. Burns at this event. I think it's the same one from the first annual Montgomery Burns Award for Outstanding Achievement in the Field of Excellence. It is a parody of Al Hirschfeld caricatures. David Silverman loves this guy. He got a caricature of himself done before Al Hirschfeld died. And with every Al Hirschfeld caricature, you can find the word Nina in it somewhere in the line work. That's the name of his daughter. If you look at this image, you can see it in Burns' sideburn.

Like right above his ear, you can see Nina spelled out. So David Silverman must have contributed to this in some way. Burns shaking sadness to this. You feel so bad for him for just a second yeah i think they like this and really i got no time for fucking cranky billionaires and that and that dd ramon if you want to see one of the he's not in this but if you want to see one of the worst raps of all time. Look up. Worse than Blondie and Rapture? Oh, by far. Dee Dee Ramone's rap. I rap. I rap.

You know what? Let's look it up. Let's look it up. Rap. Rippity rap. Blondie did rhyme Cars with Mars. No. No. Dude, it's like

Why is this every rap song from this era Begin with an introduction We'll hear it This is who I am. As I'm here to say, I like being a woman in a major way. I bit my tongue. Again, this is four minutes. It's four minutes of that.

We're the same. You can't just get any homeless person off the street and make them a rapper. In Ramone's documentary, even he admits, he's like, look, I thought I'm from the streets. They sing about the streets. I can do it. I mean, I think at the time, Colin, I thought I'm from the streets. They sing about the streets. I could do it. I mean, I think at the time Colin Quinn had a rap song on the chart. So it's I listened to that before. I'm an asshole.

Yeah, me too. Oh, yeah. But I like the little cut to I like the little cut of Burns opening the Dustbuster and Marge being disappointed. Like Burns received a unicorn. Yes. That's eating a tie. Oh, this is really great Piffle But this is the greatest

Homer performing I have some sad news to report A small puppy Not unlike Lassie Was just run over In the parking lot And now it's time For the comedy stylings

Of Homer Simpson Are you ready to laugh? Poor dog. I said, are you ready to laugh? Quiet, you awful man. You know, Mr. Burns is so cheap. What? I mean, you know, Mr. Burns is so old.

How dare you? Tough crowd. Better bring out the big guns. Here's an impression of Mr. Burns that you might find a little cheeky. Hi, Mr. Burns. Blah, blah, blah. Do this, do that. Blah, blah, blah.

I think I'm so big. Blah, blah, blah. Destroy him. Blah, blah, blah destroy him blah blah blah you give me this party is over that destroy him the riot scene of like oh man that's great they're beating everyone it's amazing and so bart helped homer with his material and that was a bart bit he was the president nixon butt caricature i am not Not a Butt. Yeah, in I Love Lisa. Maybe Bart helped him draw the butt, draw on his butt. I think so. That's kind of disgusting.

I don't always... Help me draw my butt, boy. I don't always compliment myself, but titling this track Butt-Based Promises is, I don't know, that's what I want people to remember me for. I call this Homer's Bad Ass Comedy. I'll never wiggle my bare butt in public again.

I'd like to believe that this time. I really would. Bart, run down to the store and get a big bag of ice for your father. Yes, Dad. I know you're discouraged, but please don't deny the world your fat can. Don't worry, boy. You'll be ready for your Aunt Selma's birthday. I knew it. Those Lisa shots

are taken from like season two or something. They look really old. They're just filler for like, clearly they were short on about 40 seconds. So they get in the Sinbad line, they get in those. And they were cute little lines, but they also had nothing to do with the scene. So they could never show Homer's ass like that, even like

eight years later. Oh no, I feel like we should be seeing some taint at this point with his act. But, well, I was just going to say they can't show a rear end like that on Fox. They can't show a line that is a butt crack. You know we're not censored, Henry. A butt crack. But okay, so Homer's ass,

this drove me crazy, and I'm sorry to say my research came up empty, but I know this happened. I swear to God. Please, help. So, Fox Bumpers that advertised upcoming episodes of shows, they would have hosts of them,immy kimmel would host them and be like hey but he had his hardest brooklyn accent he ever had or bronx or whatever jimmy kimmel straight out of las vegas and we hit for the halloween he did one of it was like him on the la streets going

which would you write an and for this episode, saying, what would you rather watch, Seinfeld or Homer Simpson's ass? Wow. And that was the, or maybe he said butt, but the point is he was,

and like, that's how they advertised this one, and it was just the shot of his butt and just saying, this is up against Seinfeld, wouldn't you rather watch this? Oh yeah, we're still on Thursday nights in the Homer Simpson's world, yeah. It was them and Martin going up against Seinfeld. Wouldn't you rather watch this? Oh yeah, we're still on Thursday nights.

It was them and Martin going up against Mussy TV. Would have been a semi-popular radio personality at this point. Yeah, but this was him going national. This is why Fox is like, let's see. Dude, I would kill to find this scene. It drove me crazy.

I searched. I watched 10 different collections of Fox bumpers and commercials from 1993 i know your pain he was uh the world i think he was like four years away from protect from protecting ben stein's money and as we all know now we should take that money from him i want all his money i like clear eyes and i hate evolution But Burns' art collection Very good Citizen Kane reference But again this looks like Kane's

I love that about Citizen Kane I'm not going to shut up about it I swear But he collects hundreds of thousands of dollars worth of art But doesn't display them properly No no it's just like an empty mansion Filled with trash It's expensive trash It's a warehouse filled with uncurated things.

And that's what Burns and Smithers are walking through. I didn't even get this as a reference. Yeah, it's the last scene with the butler at the end of Citizen Kane. Look at all the wonderful things you have, Mr. Burns. King Arthur's Excalibur. The only existing nude photo of Mark Twain. And that rare first draft of the Constitution with the word suckers in it. Yes, yes, yes. So what?

You want your bear bobo, don't you? Liar! I'll give you the threshing of a lifetime! Resistance is futile! Oh, God, how I want my bear. But he's gone. Gone forever. I'd give anything to know what happened to him. So the second attempt from Burns to give someone... The beating of your life.

The beating of your life, yeah. All right, so then we cut to what happened to Bobo and... Which makes Bobo Captain America. It does. And it probably angered Matt Groening, another Hitler joke. Yeah, it was... This is all your fault. It was a harsh Hitlerler joke yeah like in the

bunker about to kill himself he has the gun on the table he probably killed his dog and everyone else at this point or helped with the suicides though i didn't get it is the end of hitler it really is yeah 1945 again there's a gun on the table in front of him when he throws bobo but as a nerdo i did as a kid it bothered me even then. They have the nice connector of like, it goes from there into the water. Charles Lindbergh. To Charles Lindbergh. The first transatlantic flight. Solo.

Then to Hitler. Then in 45, it just jumps to 57 and on the sub. How did it get to the sub? It doesn't tell you how it gets there. Captain America. That's about the same, almost the same timeline. Yes, but I'm just saying that there was no there was no handoff from hitler to the sub yeah that's that's what bothered me and uh the

limburg flight i think was like in 27 maybe i don't know where hitler was or if he was that old right i mean france might have been he might have been just about to go to jail i've been watching some hitler documentaries because they have nothing to do with current times at all. I do it because it's so different from right now. But yeah, he was... And let me just confirm anybody's beliefs who's hearing this right now. Just stop listening. I'm tired. Everyone?

What Henry said, Bobby, just stop. But Matt Groening hated Hitler jokes. I think Hitler jokes were so attractive when the idea of Nazis coming back seemed impossible. And hilarious. It's weird that, that i don't know like it's even now can set the stage for like the like half of the 40s yeah you show hitler you put a time in his outfit you put a time frame on it and it's two seconds you're done maybe you'll even see him shaking hands with charles foster k to set the thing all right damn it we went

by it's a fast i meant to mention i love just the the newspaper front page of burn shaking hands with the devil like credits long life to satan but so then they end up with bobo ultimately and it it was also shocking to see 1993 just on the screen yeah i was like oh wow they really made it this year yeah and i but i think that whole sequence it's silly knock it if you'd like but the idea that like it's just a transition to get ice to the quickie martin yeah it is pretty funny you've got to start selling this for more than a dollar a bag we lost four more men on this expedition. If you can think of a better way to get ice, I'd like to hit it. He's got to say. Hey, Apu, this bag

of ice has a head in it. Ooh, a head bag. Those are chock full of heady goodness. Hey, it's a teddy bear. Ew, gross. It's probably diseased or something. Here, Maggie.

So the chock full of blank goodness we would hear again in Lisa the Vegetarian. It's chock full of bunly goodness when she gives Lisa the bun. But also, what I found funny about this episode, it's crazy. There's, like, insane jokes. It's a very, like, outlandish episode. But the plotting is very realistic. Homer was beaten, and Bart is going to get ice for his head. So they're putting the pieces together in a logical way,

even though this is an insane episode about Burns being Citizen Kane and everything. But they'd already set up Bobo, so it's not even the left turn of just like, I bet you didn't see that coming, but we made a tennis court. It's not like that. We saw him getting frozen in ice. Yeah. So, yeah, it makes sense. We've had all this set up for Bobo, and this is how Bobo arrives to them.

It feels weird to say Bobo just as an MSD3 game fan. You just say it over and over again. Professor Bobo. Son of Coco. I want to point out how weird it is how – I'm not going to speak for either Henry or Bob, but if you've been on a multi – over a decade quest to recapture your childhood, you know how empty that endeavor can be. I'm on 15 years now.

I mean, yeah, to find that one toy my mom actually had that in the 90s too when ebay was invented she when it first got big she created the account before that that which is why the i'm not going to say the account name here but my ebay account jilbert 420 no no it's it's a goofy nickname she was called as a kid but but I just kind of stuck with it. I inherited it because I still use it. But she set it up to get herself, to find the toy she had as a kid that she loved, the poor pitiful Pearl doll. And so she found it. Is that the name of a real toy? Yeah, it sounds like a depressing toy to me.

She cries when you squeeze her. But my mom loved that. She had a similar Bobo urge. So it's not even our generation. If you look at our videos, you can see in the background the My Pet Monster my parents would never get me. We're surrounded by Bobos right now. It's all over the place. All over the place.

But I love Brockman talking about Bobo and how idiotic Homer is. Right in front of you, yeah. But the thing about it is that unlike a lot of Simpsons gags, this is well animated. But works so well animated. Amazingly in audio. And I think Homer hitting his head on every step is a Merkin joke. It has to be. Just the meanest, cruelest thing to do to Homer.

And this is Wes Archer direction, by the way. Oh, yeah, for sure. The Burns Bear, perhaps the most valuable whittle bear in the world, could be anywhere. It could be in your house. You could be looking at it right now. It could be right in front of your face as I'm saying this, waggling back and forth, perhaps being

held up by a loved one. Maggie, I'm trying to watch TV. Put that moldy old bear down. Moldy? Mold?? Old? I'm going to get something to eat. Meanwhile, Smithers is trying to replace Bobo, and the first one of him in the bear costume is like,

okay, Smithers is a furry. But before we had a word for it. Leave the costume. Okay, so is Burns fucking the costume or holding it? Why does he want him to leave the costume? I would say it was more innocent than that.bo cosplay i think i guess why why is he it's just weird i will become bobo this is this is not a new thing for murk and there were already things like professor frank is gonna fix it with a thing that doesn't work i love the chaos of this scene just the pure insane chaos i'll show show you guys the cell after the clip.

The breaking of the chair is the best part. This really does have a dozen of my favorite jokes in it. I love this scene so much. Well, it's not your original, Bear, of course. But it is programmed to be just as cuddly. Oh, dog.

That's supposed to be doing a little dance trying to turn it off and then you hear that when you look at the animation so like none of that occurs in the same frame

some of it is literally off camera they pan away from Smithers. That's amazing. Do you think I should get it? Buy it, Chris. Buy it now. Are you kidding? Don't you guys want money? You can put it right there above the computer and we can just stare at it. That's where the earnest lady is supposed to be.

She's now overlooking my fucking scud the disposable assassin. She's blessing your toys. I don't know that's really great It's beautiful it's so beautiful You're free to buy two Start a bidding war I already paid $300 for a Ren and Stimpy drawing I haven't framed yet

So I'll get back to you Bob that's always the first thing I go to It's happening soon Which one did you get? It's an OG An OG drawing by Bob Camp of Stimpy's cartoon show Of them being electrocuted in Wilbur Cobb's lap. It's your favorite character, your favorite moment.

Favorite episode, yeah. Favorite episode all drawn by him. By the guy who worked on it. There's one up there for $500. Never mind. Not the animation ship. The sell hour. I want to tell you guys something on this here.

Listeners, if you follow cool artists on twitter everyone even if they're not popular they have to be someone unpopular but eventually they will say like i'm taking commissions and you will get relatively affordable commissions of really good art and it just feels so cool having well maybe this is me but like like i have my twitter avatar is now an original thing i paid for and it felt good of just like here's $25. Draw this picture of me. Could you do that? And they did it really quick and I just have original art that's

mine and me. It's really cool. I love animation cells. And I buy garbage animation cells for the most part. I just accidentally won a Fantastic Four and a Super Mario World. Oh, Super Mario World. Disgusting. $15 with an original hand-painted background. accidentally won a fantastic four and a super mario world oh super mario disgusting 15 with an original hand-painted background wow you couldn't pay someone 15 to paint you a background

it's true like those are what i usually buy and i keep my eye out for your donalds and your bugs bunnies and your simpsons i mean the ones people actually want they're real expensive well meanwhile you go to a con and they're just like, look, here, I bought a dumpster full of these. Search through them for the cartoon. Every day I walk into the studio and look at my Incredible Hulk eating honeycomb cereal from 1976 and get happy all over again.

My only sell is from the anime The Slayers. It's Lena Inverse Running and I think I paid $50 for it 15 years ago. Are you Naga the Serpentator? Oh, she sucks. The OBAs in the movies can go to hell. Yep. This is the first time I've ever been lost. I'm coming down on Slayers.

Non-canonical Slayers. So when they realize Bobo... Bobo, it's Mr. Burns' bear, alright. Well, Burns isn't getting this back cheap, I can tell you that. He's gonna have to give me my own recording studio. Two walled beef patties, special sauce lettuce, cheese, pickles, onions, onions, sesame seed bun.

Homer, you're drooling on the mic again. I think we should just give him the bear that he cherishes so much. Hmm, better sew that eye back on. No, let's send Burns the eye in the mail. He'll pay more money if he thinks the bear's in danger. Yes, we'll send the eye. I'm sure he'll offer us a fair reward. And then we'll make him double it.

Well, why can't I be greedy once in a while? I love that so much. I love Marge. I think there's two. Yeah, that joke and her joke at the end. Marge had more character here than she got to have in any of those other ones. It's just like the blank mom who's just like, oh, holler. Crumbling, yeah.

Why do I have to be the one who tells everybody not to do shit when this will clearly benefit us? And I feel like that cutaway is a very Family guy slash season four joke where Merkin and his team would not do that as much. Aljean and Mike Reese towards the end would do a lot of those cutaways, but that feels like very much of the older Simpsons

that we were going through. I had that same note too that it seems like a very season four joke. If I may, I have very few more embarrassing guilty pleasures

than the Big Mac. That is the Big Mac song. It's America's Perfect Sandwich. But it is. Bob. I know. I don't eat meat anymore, but it is the ultimate hamburger. They introduced the Grand Mac and the Mac Jr.

The Mini Mac, yeah. Please understand, I've tried them all numerous times at this point. Because I don't know what it is. I hate McDonald's on principle and afterwards. But I love the Big Mac. Its proportions are so well balanced. You get that Grand Mac, like I feel sick

and didn't taste anything that's normally in a Big Mac. Oh, I've eaten hundreds of Big Macs. I'm like, this is all salad dressing. And like the Big Mac is still perfect. But this is what Homer was singing. This comes from a commercial after the phenomenon had already happened

where everybody, they went up to people in the street to ask them to sing the song. They brought the jingle back, right? The big sandwich with the great big taste that everybody's talking about. Sesame seed bun and we forgot the onions. Yes, it did. Yes, it did say onions.

Are you sure? It said onions. All right. To all these patty specials, sauce, lettuce, cheese, pickles, onions, only sesame seed bun. McDonald's Big Mac. The great big sandwich with a great big taste.

Yes. Or the only sandwich with salad dressing. I have never had a Big Mac. Is it Thousand Island or what? You wouldn't like it because the salad, it's just... You've never had a Big Mac? Nope. I ate probably a hundred Big Macs in my life.

Oh, now. What if you had a big old crusty symbol on it that said, now without lettuce, Henry? Well, I've never had that one, but I just hate the cheap burgers. When I've had the 59 cent

cheeseburger at McDonald's, I think this is the worst burger I've ever had in my life. Having worked there, when you distribute ingredients, there's this little thing that puts this thin icicle of ketchup that you touch to the buns is like you don't want to put actual ketchup on this it's a butterfly kiss of ketchup yeah make sure it smells

like ketchup this is all buns so yeah when i would if i would go with my friends to mcdonald's i would have a chicken i would have chicken nuggets or a chicken sandwich i would not have that and it would the burgers were at burger king or wendy's those were my they were superior burgers when i when i ate meat, Wendy's was the best. Nothing beats the Burger King. Burger King just retired their Big Mac clone, the BK King. I'm the only man who said... I thought the Whopper was the Big Mac clone.

The Whopper is the rival, but it's not the copy. I see. The copy had the middle bun with the salad dressing on it. With the Thousand Island on it. Or the mayonnaise left out in the sun. What I really hate is that I am salivating now thinking of this. I'm starving. I have pretty much quit fast food.

Not that I am healthy, mind you that. But I have quit eating fast food the regularity I used to. It is very rare. Only on work trips. You know, into the slow Papa John's movement. Yeah, that's not takeout, right? That's not fast food. Oh, God.

But Homer tries to play hardball with Burns on the price. Yes. But I'm sure we can come to an understanding. Yes, sir. Reject the first offer. Reject the first offer. May I offer you a drink? Sorry, Burns.

No deal. Don't worry, Smithers. He's playing hardball now. But it won't take him long to crack. I gotta call Burns. I gotta call Burns. Maybe I can still get that drink. He literally cracks.

When he says he's going to crack, he literally does. It's a great joke on how bad you can be at negotiating. When I think of rich people lying about how rich they are, I always think of the scene like, you see this old place is falling apart. When the crown falls on his head. He's buried in money. But when I say I want to buy a Simpsons animation

cell for $300, I mean going into debt for the better part of the year and helping pay that off. That's what I mean. Not hoarding money. But damn, I... I just love that rich joke and helping pay that off. That's what I mean. Not hoarding money. But damn, I... Patreon.com. I just love that rich joke so much. I think they do a better version of it

with money fight. Yeah. Money fight, yeah. Money fight. Having the ceiling crack and a Scrooge McDuck amount of riches. With a literal crown falling. A crown falls on his head.

It's beautiful. There are literally partially things that should be in a museum. This is called Maggie Won't Quit Bobo. I knew you'd come crawling back. How much do you want? A million dollars and three Hawaiian islands. Good ones, not the leper ones.

Done. Now give me that bear. Woo-hoo! I'm rich! Rich, I tells you! Here you go! It seems to be stuck. Bad baby. Bad

Maggie. Give me the bear. The bear. The bear. Here you go maggie the deal's off mr burns the bear stays here smithers gives us he gives us awesome groan when he leaves the house like he has to be mad on burns behalf yeah the energy so yeah i wonder if this connection between maggie and here is, well, they inspire them for the Who Shot Mr. Burns resolution. I think it made a play into the seed. Watching this again, it feels a tiny bit contrived.

I feel like Marge would be the one to step in and be like, this is more important than money. Not Homer, in this instance. But I like that it comes to play later on, where he thinks Marge is disappointed because of her comment earlier. Yeah. He's like, no, I'm really proud of you. Yeah. For without me having to intervene, you've set up your daughter. I mean, I think it's just coming off of recording Homer Goes to College when he is the ultimate crazy violent asshole.

To see him show compassion for a child in her toy, it's just kind of odd, like immediately afterwards. This is still a little bit of season like three yeah for sure it's bubbling up though i do just love homer that feels like a conan thing too or schwartzwelder of i tells you yeah and that they really drop abe's vehicular manslaughter like he's run over three people and then it's not up again. So how's it by you? I love that Burns and Smithers are working together to steal it instead of hiring goons. Exactly. They dropped the hired goons.

Now it's personal. This is Bobo. It doesn't work in audio, but how funny it is that they try and infiltrate the Simpsons house. The shitty zip line. Yeah. And being end up rescued by the fire department and given cocoa by Marge. Yeah, I get it. Nice try. Just kind of given cocoa by Marge. Yeah, I get it. Nice try. Just kind of like a spy versus spy.

I get it. I respect this. I prefer their suction cup breaking and entering into the Simpsons home. This is another of my favorite scenes. I had a hard time picking my line of the show. This is the definite runner-up. 64 slices of American cheese. 64. 64 American cheese. 64. 63.

Jesus. One. Have you been up all night eating cheese? I think I'm blind. Good day to you. So many perfect lines in a row. I mean, if you didn't grow up white in Midwestern, the ubiquitous

giant rectangle of Kraft cheese slices, I don't think you had that in your refrigerator. If you buy less, you're losing money. Yeah, but again, it's not real cheese. It's like yellow oil pressed into squares. It's called American cheese because it's all one word. Neither American nor cheese. And it all stays good forever.

Yeah. Those little plastic – the observationalness of the pile of the plastic, the way you have to take it off. I know after seeing this as a kid, I must have eaten like six slices of cheese in a row just to see what it was like i always thought it was kind of gross but i still am entering that lazy period of like it's late at night i will wrap a piece of ham and a slice of cheese and there's bread right there and i have the entire night ahead of me how we use electricity can be smarter cleaner and greener at electric ireland we can help guide you there you see our new net zero hub has all you need to know about smart meter plans ev tariffs solar panels and much more making your usage clearer your trips greener your home cozier and your world

brighter find our net zero hub at electricireland.ie. I am a cheese fan, and the idea of eating this kind of cheese is disgusting to me now. And I ate a lot of fake cheese growing up. It's too smooth. It's like rubbery. It's so bizarre and shiny. And I like the little touch in the animation when Marge comes into the room, like eating cheese, like your head raises

with the cheese. It's nice extra acting. And also the idea that suction cups do wear off if you hold them so they just lose their power over seven hours. For as weak as Burns is he has amazing muscle control to like stay in a cat-like position up on the ceiling.

They both like crouch upwards. You're right. I do that on monkey bars to save my life. But I gotta play this clip just because it leads into my favorite. My clip of the season, clip of the entire Talking Simpsons run. Almost here. Burns invades television to get

Bobo back. Two plus two is four. Two plus two is four. I can see why this is so popular. Barney Burns. Two plus two is four i can see why this is so popular barney burn give me my bear simpson it's the so fast transit system give it to me as you can see simpson i have taken over all 78 channels and you won't see any of your favorite shows again until you give in oh that bite holy crap what's that you say

you can live without television as long as you have beer? That's right. Wrong. All beer trucks heading towards Springfield have been diverted. This town will be as dry as a bone. And if the rest of you beer-swilling tube jockeys out there have a problem with this, talk to Homer Simpson. Homer, give him what he wants. And Barney kills a woman after this. Seemingly so. Yeah.

It's pretty, that's pretty dark. How do you know it's 1993? They make fun of Barney. Yeah. Yes. Which seems bizarre in hindsight, that all of us cared to take this children's television show icon down a peg. Yes.

Everybody made fun of Barney. Like Animaniacs, everything had a Barney Joker. I think the critic would have an entire Barney episode where Jay sleeps with the woman who plays whatever the Humphrey the Hippo. Charles Barkley beat him up on SNL. It shows you how ubiquitous Barney was. He was freaking everywhere. It did seem inexplicably popular. Yeah, it was a good crossover with the popularity of jurassic park and they sure

don't look like barney there but i think the main crux of the jokes at him were that this is not sesame street like barney is so much worse more boring stupid and stupid, and insipid. Yeah, it's very insipid. It's a great word for it. It's bad for children in that how very stupid it is. Yeah. I tried to watch a little bit of the movie. Oh, there is a movie. I forgot about that. Yeah, a theatrical film.

Way too late. Because Follow That Bird is one of the greatest films I've ever seen in my life. An unnecessary amount of Hitchcock parodies in Follow That Bird. Sesame Street movie, yeah. For the Sesame Street movie. Really good. That Barney movie, it seems like,

I don't know, it seems like a fever dream. Well, but Barney looks like shit. It's not a good puppet. Yeah, and why is he flying a plane? This looks insane. It's a bad puppet with no character to it. It's just like purple felt with a couple dots.

He does like your generic impression if you thought for no more than half a second on what your children's show host sounded like. Duh! I'm gonna... I love you! I talk slow and duh. Yeah, and he's just about emotions.

Like, he doesn't teach you shit. Like, Sesame Street was originally, at least, made with teachers to teach children things. And seriously, when you seriously when you listen to big bird talk big bird doesn't ever talk down to his audience his voice sounds awesome oh i didn't know that did you know that like fuck i'd much rather my kids watch this and i don't have any i did like homer with the box too the box thing and we did miss uh homer reporting for much worse duty where he's turning the dessert tray and And I love the Lenny and Carl scene.

I feel like they're figuring out Lenny and Carl. Lenny says, I wonder what makes it turn, and Carl goes, who cares? Notice they're wearing polo shirts in there, though. That's a little weird, yeah. But I love the essential Lenny and Carl, like a kind of bad friendship. Oh, leading up to my line of the show,

the greatest scene of season five. That's the joke. Smithies, I'm home. What? Already? Yes. Is it my imagination or is TV getting worse? It's about the same. Uh-oh, look out, Smithers!

I love this show. The greatest capper is Homer saying, I love this show. It's the lookout Smithers. Part of my favorite jokes in The Simpsons are the things they don't bother to show you. It all feeds into that. As someone

who's cutting the audio already that that it it deliberately slams cut the laugh track yeah to make it seem shittier oh yeah the laugh track is poorly edited in the show yeah i assure you i've used the married with children laugh track in shit i've made because you can't tell because it sounds authentic yeah uh but they made that intentionally i mean that'skin fighting television again. And I think we all love, yes. Yes. I mean, I didn't realize.

It's backwards. I thought that was just an internal thing with me and my friends. And then, like, the last couple years, yes has blown up. Yeah. It is. I don't know how to describe Simpsons memes at this point. They're ridiculous. They've really gotten crazy now.

It seems like an indecipherable language. My favorite one to date is, so in the 101 dalmatians parody episode homer is eating chips right and the dalmatians are snatching them out of his hand i saw a parody meme of that where homer is pulling steamed hams out of a bag and puppies with the heads of superintendent chalmers are taking them out of his hands as he tries to eat them. It's impenetrable. Simpsonship posting is so good. It's impenetrable. Simpsonship posting. My favorite one I saw, which was the head of Skinner on Raymier Wolfcastle as radioactive man's body, and him saying, like, is it real acid?

No, the goggles do nothing. It was like, is it my fault? It's the goggles that do nothing. It's the goggles that do nothing it was it was like is it my fault the goggles that do nothing but that sitcom i love that joke is a great parody of sitcoms yeah it is a great parody of homer loving the thing that's supposed to torture him now and but it's also funny of the construction of like not only it burns by every channel but he feels like he has to make the shows on it like and it seemingly all comes from channel six like everything is filmed there he has to run from set to set and he also had seven he has 78 channels yeah which i bought an antenna recently and i think i have about that many over the air just over here wow and that

that yeah that burns smithers says that burns becomes a super villain in blocking out the sun but this is super villainy here that's why i like it so much he buys up all the tv channels that wouldn't be believable in a normal sitcom airing in 1993 somehow diverts all beer delivery in springfield i don't know how that happens but it happens and i've only seen the opposite happen in times of a fucking hurricane in Florida, we would be out of water. And it seems like... But not hurricane shower, right? Beer.

Beer would be half price and delivered in surplus. It's the only clean thing to drink. It helps you get through the hurricane. I thought it was just to calm us down. I also love that bully... The scene where the bully's over, Bart, with like, My old man can't get a beer because his old man won't give a bear to another old man that was perfect henry the first snapdragon of the season and when we talk about simpsons

being a language my old buddy shane patterson we used to work in games journalology yeah and we when we would joke about news it would always be with these two these two lines from these two scenes I love it so much so good sand today hmm Burns and Maggie oh well I don't usually well just this once

damn you paparazzo damn you paparazzo the first time I've heard paparazzo maybe the only time I've heard paparazzo the masculine of paparazzi I think it's the singular

of paparazzi yeah that's right yeah never heard it before and birds is so cultured he'd know that like he he knows multiple languages like how march says graffito tag and my buddy that's the first one my buddy shane what a scoop when he wanted to diffuse like when you're in the middle of talking shane i love you you asshole but like did you hear about the today? And he would respond with the last part. Maggie, I've given this a lot of thought.

I'm sure we can come to some sort of agreement. Yes! Josh! Beaten by an infant. What could be more humiliating? What a scoop! What a scoop is how Shane would respond. Did you see the new trailer? What a scoop! What a scoop is how Shane would respond.

Did you see the new trailer? What a scoop! It feels like a Conan line to me. I can hear him saying that in my head. Just like the robot talking that way, the paparazzi are saying, What a scoop! Do you know how many robots and bear costumes

have been on Late Night with Conan O'Brien? It is ridiculous. And 1940s paparazzi. There's been a million characters like that on that show. And I love it. I love it. I love that with Conan. And yeah, that he can't beat a baby.

This is the weakest he's ever been. Yeah. He can't take it away. He could barely give a thumbs up a long time ago. Or crush a paper cup. Yeah. But, oh, Burns goes full drench for it. Maggie pities him so much that even a baby is like,

your life is so empty. You're more pathetic than a baby. Yes, have this bear. Take your bear back. For me? Bobo? Wow. Smithers, I'm so happy.

Something amazing has happened. I'm actually happy. Take a note. From now on, I'm only going to be good and kind to everyone. I'm sir i don't have a pencil no don't worry i'm sure i'll remember it this and the next line you have chris our total merkin era endings of episodes yeah like just i feel like this is very evocative of what you mentioned the last episode this character is going to change forever and maybe not maybe not. How did the Simpsons do? How did they make out of all this?

They got nothing. Nothing. No one learned anything. Well, we didn't get any money, but Mr. Burns got what he wanted. Marge, I'm confused. Is this a happy ending or a sad ending? It's an ending. That's enough.

All of these endings are real weird and great. It's a great Marge line, too. Marge is really cutting through the bullshit here. I like that Marge got the maddest statement. I like that she got that. And yeah, I feel like the most heightened version of this ending is the next week on The Simpsons. Get out of here, Flanders. Ay carumba.

Even more bizarre because I don't get it. In the future. Bobo, I know I say this every century, but I'll never leave you behind again. Wait for me, sir. I could have sworn this was brought up before. You're the Planet of the Apes superfan, right? That is evocative of

a little piece of jerry goldsmith's planet of the apes score but almost nothing else in it if anything it looks more like a precursor to futurama yeah burns his head in the jar in the robot body looking a lot like bender but i know i've talked about this so much on a podcast somebody has corrected me and told me what it was from but i I did a light Google search while we were talking about it. I was looking for it too, but I couldn't. I didn't see anything. Yeah. This ending, obviously, is first Planet of the Apes.

Yeah. But then... I know Planet of the Apes well enough to where nobody's head is grafted on anything ever in Planet of the Apes. Them and that doesn't make sense. But same with the head on the robot body. I just... I remember... I should have just call my mom and said hey remember she said back when the episode first aired that's a reference to this and i couldn't

find it i searched for it i think one of our listeners will figure this out yeah i'm sure smart alex in the comments tell me what i'm forgetting i The closest I can think of, but it doesn't line up, is that in the Mars Attacks film, that head is attached to a dog's body, Pierce Brosnan's head. But that's not... Sarah Jessica Parker's head is on the dog body. Did it come from a card from the 50s or 60s? Maybe it is a Mars Attacks card. There's stuff like that, but that music is so specific to something.

Of course, yeah. I don't honestly know what it is. So help us in the comments guys yes we seemingly know everything on these but we don't know this one but yes and most people attribute it to plenty of the apes i'm like that's just tertiary for like a second the rest of it is it seems so specific it's kind of inspired by it i think but that was a futurama ass ending for sure even though the the key future futurama people other than mac reigning aren't working on this episode i don't west archer did not work west archer went to king the hill he didn't go to future i love somebody proposed when we get into the seasons of the simpsons we don't love as much we should just revert to futurama rama uh and i'm like i i would

at this point i would much rather watch re-watch futurama than season 13 of the simpsons when we get to 2000 i can see doing that and i hope somebody was smart enough to like just have burns and smithers run by in one episode of futurama that would have been amazing well bender shows up in the future of the simpsons so yeah unfortunately so yeah this has been talking simpsons i i love this episode i think it might be my favorite one it's my favorite one so far and they've all been so strong. Yeah. I mean, we all love Mr. Burns, right?

Like, this is the, I mean, not the first, but I think it's the most Burns-centric one period to date. It's all about, it's a biography of Mr. Burns. Yeah. And we didn't get that before. The Simpsons are guest in Burns' episode. And I love the Citizen Kane references. Yeah. I love the, there's like the 64 Slices of American Cheese,

the Burns' sitcom, and the Ramones' song. Like, those are three of my favorite things to ever happen in the show. I still, boy, Mr. Plow is my gold standard so far. But I think I might like this more than Mr. That episode didn't make little Chris almost spend $300 for no reason. Oh, that beer joke, too. All right, you know what? I think Rosebud might be my new number one, guys.

But what's amazing is they replaced 75% of the staff and were able to kick off season five with such an amazing set of episodes. This and Homer Goes to College, and it will keep getting good. You have to give Merkin credit. He took over and ran it this well. They could have failed in so many ways because of this. Well, it's not just Merkin, but Merkin took over the writer room. You could also

say that he had the help of, while there was turnover with the writers, the animators were basically all the same. Oh yeah, for sure. There were some new hires. Rosebud is one of the top five best ever. Once again, please watch Citizen Kane. It is good for you.

That leads into my plugs, which I'll just say lasertimepodcast.com. It's where this show and a bunch of other shows live, as well as a bunch of our videos, articles, all that stuff. But also lasertimepodcast.com slash live. As a show of devotion to Talking Simpsons listeners, Thursday, the day after this post, 8 p.m., I will show you all the Simpsons references to Citizen Kane,

and you can watch for free, no ads, no money, Citizen Kane, 8 p.m., wherever you are. That sounds awesome. Wherever you are. I think I'll be there for that. And if you're there an hour earlier, check out The Critic and Duckman. And then after that, Mystery Science Theater,

some Dr. Katz maybe, who knows some MXC, Tales from the Crypt, all great. Excellent, Chris. I've been your Theater, some Dr. Katz maybe, who knows some MXC, Tales from the Crypt, all great. Excellent, Chris. I've been your host, Bob Mack. You can find me online on Twitter as Bob Servo. I also host the classic gaming podcast, Retronauts. Find that every Monday at retronauts.com. Or just find us on Twitter as Retronauts or look in your podcast machine for Retronauts.

We're there every week giving you new classic gaming podcasts. Find a game you like, listen to it. You'll love the podcast. My Twitter account backwards is G-Y-E-N-E-R-E-H. This is the DUI test now. But seriously, follow me on Twitter, H-E-N-E-R-E-Y-G. You can find all the updates about this show. Whenever an episode of this goes live, I am the first to tweet it out

because obviously I was the one who said it live. So I tweet it out. So follow me there to stay up to date on all the Talking Simpsons stuff as well as news on the world. And you can read my great work on fandom.com alongside Bob's. And we just did a bunch of Nintendo stuff, I'm assuming.

And also, you should follow this show on patreon.com slash LazerTime. We just did the Season 4 wrap-up just for Talking Simpsons. $5 a month gets you access to the entire first season of Talking Simpsons, the Seasons 2, 3, and 4 wrap-up, and that's where the Season 5 wrap-up will live eventually. And it supports this show, and this show would not exist without patrons on Patreon.

Just $5 a month gets you access to a ton of stuff. Please, please, please. Yeah, this show has been brought to you by Sean D. and many other fine members of patreon.com slash lasertime. Thank you guys so much for supporting us and helping us to continue to make this happen. Cool, thank you so much for listening. We'll be back next week with Treehouse of War

for possibly the best animated Simpsons ever. See you then, everybody. See you then, everybody. Wow. Infotainment.