Talking Simpsons - Talking Simpsons - The Way We Was

Episode Date: January 6, 2016

The Simpsons begin a flashback tradition as Marge and Homer tell their kids about how them fell in love. Take a trip back to 1974 (in 1991) for another landmark episode…

This week's episode of Talking Simpsons is brought to you by Geek Fuel. Go to geekfuel.com slash lasertime to sign up for a box of geeky goodies sent to you directly. And if you sign up through geekfuel.com slash lasertime, you will get an exclusive Star Wars item worth $20 added to your first box! Ahoy, hoy, everybody, and welcome to Talking Simpsons, where we drink a lot of beer and stay out all night. I'm your host for this one, Bob Mackie. Who else is here today with me? Christopher antista biggest simpsons fan ever henry gilbert the real biggest simpsons fan oh my gosh i'm dave redden and some people call me maurice dave was a real space cowboy and today's episode is the way we was which in case you don't remember this is the 70s flashback episode to when homer and marge first met in high school. This episode aired on January 31st, 1991. Chris, what happened on this fable day in history?

Oh my god, Bobby. Oh my god. Marriott announces it's selling all 104 of its Big Boy Burger chains. The American Music Awards announces MC Hammer has tied Michael Jackson as their most decorated ours ever. And AIDS announces it's the number two killer of leading... The number two leading killer of young men. Did the virus make a press release?

And I gotta say, prayer did not help MC Hammer avoid bankruptcy. And please note that Charlie Sheen was a young man back then. Oh, boy. We're getting personal now. That was some dark news to cap that off with. I apologize. This episode's gonna be funny, boy. We're getting personal now. That was some dark news to cap that off with. I apologize. This episode is going to be funny, though. That's when everybody started wearing the red ribbons.

Big Boy Burgers, isn't that the Lard Lad Donuts? Lard Lad. Holding up a platter with a burger on it. I've never been to one, but I remember a news chain of my parents with a look of Jaw Drop Shop, the the last big boy burger i think there's still a couple around the country but they've returned well that was a joke in austin powers that big boy was making its return yeah so it's dr evil's lair right it was in a big boy so this episode i want to talk about one thing first like this is the first taste of 70s nostalgia that i think the

world would experience but just putting this in perspective this episode is written in 1991 and aired in 1991 probably written in 1990 i'm guessing but yeah okay, this episode is written in 1991 and aired in 1991. Probably written in 1990, I'm guessing. But, okay, so this episode is about 17 years before 91. If this episode aired today, it would be about 1998. They actually did that. So just think about that. That's one of the worst episodes. It's one of the most hated episodes.

I hate that episode. I don't want to talk about that 90s show because it just destroys canon. It relishes in destroying canon in a way that I feel is self-destructive. It's incredibly surreal as an adult fan of The Simpsons, though. This flashback is so canon, it's not even funny. Artie Ziff is created here. And the idea that you're going to flash back to your origins, and it's from when I was in high school?

And also, Homer invents grunge after grunge is invented. It doesn't make any sense at all. It's a terrible episode. But Sonic does ask you to wear cond all. It's a terrible episode. But Sonic does ask you to wear condoms. That's true. I know I'm infringing on your guys' territory, but Matt Groening didn't want to do this episode

because he didn't want to stake this instance to a time issue. Brad Bird also said the same thing. I'm like, you're going to regret this. If this goes for 10 years, this is going to stick you at a certain time. And they say, like, ah, forget it, buddy. They were just like, this is such a good episode

and such a good concept. Central to the episode is 70s jokes everywhere. If you lose the time frame, then you lose the joke. And it was really surreal watching this with my parents because Homer and Marge graduate in 74 and so did my parents. My parents are on the verge of turning 60, or they just did turn 60.

So, like, that is, like, the quote-unquote real age of Marge and Homer is 60 at this point. I made that note, too. Like, if they were 18 in 74, they are pushing 60 now. And they were born in 56, I'm guessing, or 55. Yeah. Right around my parents. Yeah. So, like, I feel like this was the first taste of 70s nostalgia anyone would have.

Definitely the first for me. And, like, the 90s would always just be about 70s nostalgia point you were just like shut up i did not live through this era i don't care about platform shoes or lapels or whatever brady bunch yeah one of the best she got hit in the eye with a football yeah the best unsung movies of the 90s is the beavis and butthead movie which seems to think watching it now like did they really think the 70s was this funny and that's why they have to open the movie? Like, any kind of Waka Chica and Afros were immediately, like, comedy gold in the 90s.

So, I mean, it was untapped ground, I guess. This episode is riddled with. And now the 70s were as close to them as the 90s are to us now. So I wonder if the kids our age are going to be like, I don't care about this 90s nostalgia. Quit with your Kickstarters, Mystery Science Theater 3000. This episode would be about, like, there would be, like, Papa Roach and, like, Fred Durst on the soundtrack.

And, like, Homer wearing JNCOs and things like that. It is one of the most hacked soundtracks of 70s nostalgia history. The Steve Miller Band, Do the Hustle. The thing is, these are very specific to 1974. Like, the prom is Goodbye Yellow Brick Road, which was, like, a 73 album by Elton John. Oh, Bobby. They are so specific, and they used to be very specific to 1974. The prom is Goodbye Yellow Brick Road, which was a 73 album by Elton John. Oh, Bobby. They are so specific, and they used to be very specific about these things. This is going to take place in 74.

They all have to be 74 related, or at least within that time period. So should we talk about Elga Hunter? Yeah, where does it start? The framing device, which became the framing device for all flashback episodes. That's right. Something goes wrong. Either the TV show they're watching is boring or the TV breaks. In this case,

they're watching a Siskel and Ebert parody. Which I love because I love... These are both dead men, by the way, if you want to play that. Well, now,

it's only recently. And that chase at the end, my friend. Are you nuts? That movie stinks like your creepy one-bedroom apartment. I didn't think

it was so creepy. My mother, real mature. I'm sick of your great school. I love watching a bald guy argue with a fat tub of lard. Okay, I want to say, like, I recognize that as a joke because Homer is both bald and fatter than Ebert.

Yes. I love how celebrated Roger Ebert and Gene Siskel were back in the day. They were the most recognizable critics in the world. Who's the most recognizable critic now? PewDiePie. PewDiePie. Yeah, I guess so. But I do want to say, Chris, we have to see

the first appearance of McBain. I don't know if you grabbed the clip. Our next movie is McBain. Another shoot him up, push him through the plate glass window, splatter fest from the Hollywood cookie cutter. Here's a typically brainless scene. Senator Mendoza is one of the most respected citizens in the state, McBain.

And yet you ran his limo off a cliff, broke the necks of three of his bodyguards, and drove a to his front door captain i have proof that he's head of an international drug cartel i don't want to hear it mcbain you're out of here that makes two of us okay that makes two of us so throughout the first three or four makes two of us. So, throughout the first three or four years, we see a lot of McBain clips,

and the amazing thing is if you hook them all up to each other, they tell an entire story, which I only realized recently, like, Mendoza pops up later,

because when McBain is mourning the death of his father, it's like, Mendoza! I don't think it does tell a whole story. No, it does.

There's a YouTube, there's been a YouTube video. I know this, but what it is, it's so specifically making fun of a certain type of movie with the same characters. There's not a real movie in there. It's just all little pieces of a cliche of what all those movies were. This is more than just a fan theory, Chris.

I think it's real. They could act like it's different films. They're like, no, he's chasing after Santa Mendoza. He's told not to do that. His partner is killed by a guy hired by Mendoza, he's told not to do that. Yeah. His partner is killed by a guy hired by Mendoza. And then there's like, the party's like,

it's three times more addictive than marijuana. Yeah. I love that. Yeah. Again, I think they were done sequentially in order,

but I don't think on behalf of the writers they were trying to make a whole new main movie. I think they were in on, not like a movie, but they were just like, they were pulling clips

from what could have been a movie. Yeah. The biggest props I want to give is to whoever did the celluloid border and font for the movie clip of the review show is so painfully,

disgustingly Tim and Eric accurate to that kind of show. Yeah. It was such a specific Artem Schwarzenegger joke that here's a guy who is impossibly giant and has an accent

that makes no sense. Like, yeah, he's a cop. He's just a cop. Name McBain. Yeah. And he's a cop. He's just a cop named McBain. Yeah. And there was a movie, there was an action film called McBain that came out after this that apparently the Fox lawyers told them,

no, you can't call him McBain because there's this movie. Like, but we had it first. And Riff Trax did a Riff Trax of it. They did? And Christopher Walken is in McBain. Really? Yeah.

And so that's why he just became Raymier Wolfcastle and they were introducing him by his character name, his actor name all the time. Really? Yeah. That's why he just became Ramir Wolfcastle and they were introducing him by his character name his actor name all the time. McBain. Jesus Christ. There was a real McBain movie. I was very annoyed that it wasn't President McBain, that it was President Schwarzenegger in the movie. Yeah, I feel like

that was a little patronizing. Elected to lead, not read. So what happens in this episode is the TV breaks. I'd rather tell you a different story. How your father and I first met and fell in love. We were seniors in high school,

but we had never even met. Never ever heard that song before this episode. The Carpenters. Yeah. But it's a sound alike here. I think Steve Miller is the real song, but the Carpenters might be a sound alike. Really? Yeah, they got the... Yeah, I mean, they got the song song, but the Carpenters might be a sound alike. Really? Yeah, they got the song rights, but they just didn't get the master rights. It's a little too expensive.

Yeah, but this became their song. Speaking again of the movie, that song is playing on their wedding videotape. Yeah. Which, though, is apocryphal. They did not film their wedding. They got married in Reno, Nevada. That is true. But anyway, Nevada. That is true. But anyway. I still like that it's, as far

as licensed music goes, this is one of the only songs to come back over and over again. Yeah. Though I also did not get, as a kid, the idea that Homer proposed to Marge by getting her pregnant. Like, that's how he proposed to her. Out of wedlock.

So yeah, I mean, we flash back to 1974 and like, Homer is the homer that we know today he is like shiftless aimless no ambition and just an idiot once again a great clip of dan castellan is singing some people call me a space cowboy some people call me the gangster of love some people call me the gangster of love. Some people call me Maury. Woo, woo.

Oh, God. I always do the woo, woo when I sing along with it, too. I have a, oh, man. Steve Miller Band. Steve Miller Band. I shouldn't even bring this up. Please do, Chris. But it tortures me now. I was so in love with this girl in high school,

and she just considered me her friend. Just beautiful. And at one point, it seemed like she was torturing me, and she didn't like me like that. And then one time, she's like, I've been practicing my stripping, and literally stripped naked to this song in front of me. And I was such a fucking wuss and a baby.

I'm just like, that's pretty good stripping. Do you think it was her testing you to see if you had the balls to make a movie and if she got naked? I absolutely knew she didn't want anything to do with me like that. She was treating me like... She was taunting you then.

She treated me like a... No, she was treating me like her gay friend. I see. Because I was so harmless and like... I'm picturing you as Roger Rabbit with the stink coming out of the ears. You were in the friend zone, not the bone zone. Where you wanted to be.

I got there eventually. I love Homer's car, number one. It's so cool. I think it's a Pinto. I think so. Yeah, it's hideous. Also, I made this note that after watching now Futurama, I can't not see Homer as Fry. Keen Homer is Fry.

And I think it's also because Mac Raining says on the commentary that Teen Homer was kind of inspired by him. Same haircut. Also the same haircut of Brett Elston from the last 15 years. I was watching the episode and I'm like, it would not take that much modification to make my hair like Homer's. Like flatten here, part here. You're really going to ditch the Dolph Ziggler, Daniel Bryan thing you have happening? You need puffier bangs though. I don't know if I could just flatten everything, it would be kind of like Homer's.

But anywho. I also meant to point out, whenever I see these scenes of the Simpsons watching television together and not looking at their iPhones, it's always a little jarring. But the idea of an entire family sitting around together and watching a Siskel and Ebert review show like that, I can just imagine throwing things at my parents until they change their family. And they're traumatized when it's over. When the TV breaks, they're screaming. I think this is sick.

You're staring at a dot. That's a great line. So we also meet Marge. And one of the things I missed in this episode where her friend introduces her to feminism, but all of Marge's feminism is based on one issue of one magazine magazine is radicalized within like two hours and she applies it inappropriately later when she's talking about the movie butterflies are free is that a real movie that's what her speech is based on

in two different scenes yes if your kid is blind yes like uh okay we'll talk about this later but we'll get to it i'm for equal, but do we really need a whole amendment? Come on, Marge. Don't you think you deserve to earn just as much as a man who does the same job? Well, not if I have to do heavy lifting or math. Oh, Marge, you really ought to read this. That is such an old stereotype. Do you know anybody in your life who is better at math than a woman?

Yeah. Was that a stereotype? Women are bad at math? I think that's what it was. Is that only men could do math? That's why everybody got so mad at Barbie saying math is hard. That's right, yeah. Which would later be a Simpsons episode. I feel like the stereotype is flipped though, right?

Like women are just like... When we go and play a strategy game, all of our women friends kick the shit out of us. My lady particularly helps me balance my finances. Like how the fuck did women get the reputation of being bad at math? I'm actually hearing that I've heard men rights activists quote statistics that men are falling behind women in all these college fields. They're better educated than men. It's the war on men. Exactly.

Whatever happened to Marge's friend, too? Homer is still friends with Barney to this day. I do love the clip of them meeting in high school for the first time. Hey Homer, your life for English. English. Who needs that? I'm never going to England.

Come on, let's go smoke. So when he, okay. So I first read that as a kid as they're smoking cigarettes, but when he calls that, when he calls them their answer to Cheech and Chong, were they supposed to be smoking weed?

I think you're right. Because I also think, was this the first time I saw a bong? Or was there a bong premium? The bong line. It was the first time I'd heard the word bong. I don't know if it was Dondalinger was so out of touch that he didn't realize Cheech and Chong were smoking pot. That's the most Rick and Morty principal name. Is his name Dondalinger?

Mr. Dondalinger. Mr. Long, yeah. And he comes back on occasion. But yeah, Marge also notices the smell of smoke coming from the boys' room, which is like... I guess if it was tobacco, you'd smell that too. Yeah, you would, but they're smoking... I don't know. It's a specific...

Marijuana is a specific smell. Yeah. If I didn't say this already, I said it in the last episode, but these two are a one-two of emotional emotional wreckage for poor little chris here uh like i don't know why but this this episode really gets me right in the cockles uh homer meeting march for the first time excuse me is this room 106 hey who's that i i don't know it's a great sequence it's a great sequence i It's a great sequence. I love the animation. David Silverman, by the way.

Oh, yeah. He mentioned... So this isn't The Carpenters? No. It's The Carpenters. Like me. It's a studio singer. Yeah, it's a very close sound to Kevin Carpenter.

Also, yeah, speaking of David Silverman, he mentioned on the commentary that he graduated in 74 as well. So he brought in his school yearbook to show them, like, here's fashion. Here's what we were all doing in 74. And Marge's hair, she's wearing her hair down. She's putting her bangs behind her ears. Her hairstyle reminds me of, is it Busy Phillips from Freaks and Geeks? Yeah, Busy Phillips from Freaks and Geeks.

The exact same hairstyle. Though once her hair goes up, she doesn't look young anymore. She's like, well, you're grown up, Marge, now. It's very indistinguishable. And Homer with hair looks so much younger. He's not supposed to be that old in the show, but the hair does do a lot for him. It's later in a later flashback where they show the progress of his hair. And I'm like, okay, now that all makes sense.

It's all plausible. So then when Homer tells his dad, him courting Marge, he meets Marge in detention. Marge's first time in detention. So Homer goes to detention for smoking and Marge goes for burning her bra. Which goes up like tissue paper.

Was that supposed to indicate that Marge stuffed her bra? I thought it might, but I think it just... This episode to me is one of the funniest ever. Like line for line is really funny. I think stuffing your bra was just putting tissues in it because there's there's an episode of the wonder years where kevin finds out the cheerleader stuffs her bra and it's like traumatic for him but i didn't know if that was marge's bra or someone's important bra that was given to her during the the demonstration like i thought it was supposed to be funny that they were burning up they didn't know how to burn a bra when making a proper...

I didn't read it as a small tit joke. You pervs! God, I'm so progressive. It does remind me of when they're burning the crusty merchandise. It's like, wow, I didn't realize they would burn that much. Burn that quick. But this scene I think is particularly sweet. Homer trying to ask out Marge into tension.

Oh, yeah. So, what are you in for? I'm a political prisoner. Last time I ever took a stand. Well, I'm here for being me every day i show up act like me and they slap me in here simpson be quiet i haven't seen you in school before okay simpson what you just bought yourself another day of detention maybe we should get together sometime two days i'm sorry i don't even know your name i'm homer three days four days

simpson five days it was worth it. Six days. Okay, Simpson, to the back of the room. You should have punished Marge for talking there, though, too. They never explained, like, why was Marge new to the school. They never explained why they would never have met before. No, I mean, you went to high school and you didn't know everybody. Yeah, but there's only a little thing with Marge because she's treated like the hottest girl in school, but nobody knows her name. She's not popular. There's only a little thing with Marge because she's treated like the hottest girl in school, but nobody knows her name.

She's not popular. I mean, my school was probably like the graduating class was probably like 200 or 300 people. So I knew one third of them from my grade school and then another third of them from middle school. And then the other third at the beginning of high school. No, but it was like you would gradually get to know all these people. Senior year, if somebody shows up, they a new kid and that they're a mystery it does not frame that very well at all it does treat marge like the new kid yeah i think marge was just a nerd who took civics classes who blossomed but homer was never going to see her and homer is probably self-centered and stupid so it's very possible he doesn't know everybody. He's got the worst father ever. I love the flashbacks how bad Abe is.

How bad his advice is. In most flashback sequences, Abe is portrayed as awful. And their house is just disgusting. Dude, again, there's too many things that awoke in something in me and Barney's house, but at least it's not Abe's house. Yeah, where he's raising a family. There's greasy fan vents all over this. It's everywhere.

It's everywhere. Their dinner is like, we got a bucket of Shakespeare's fried chicken. Let's raising a family. There's like greasy fan vents all over this. Yeah, everywhere. Closer to the ceiling. Their dinner is like, we got a bucket of Shakespeare's fried chicken. Let's just eat it together. I miss Shakespeare's fried chicken. Again, the worst advice ever. Now, this girlfriend of yours, is she a real looker?

Uh-huh. Light on the ball? Oh, yeah. Oh, son, don't overreach. Go for the dented card. Get in, job. The dead end job. The less attractive girl. Oh, Abe.

Oh, I blame myself. I should have had this talk a long time ago. Thanks, Bob. Thanks, Bob. Yeah, knowing Abe's wife left him makes this scene a lot more poignant for me. And that would be like, Abe sends us an MRA. Why Homer aspires to nothing. And like, why when he's even

treated with a job in the nuclear power plant he reacts like this. Homer, do you have any plans for after graduation? Me? I'm going to drink

a lot of beer and stay out all night. No, I meant career-wise. You know, that nuclear power plant will be opening soon. It's one of the few outfits around that won't require

a college education. Me in a nuclear power plant Kaboom! I like seeing birds on that brochure too So that guidance counselor would grow up to be Ebert in the beginning of the episode Your mother didn't think it was so A joke we skipped there that I really didn't get as a kid was when abe tells him to get a beer that's right it's like i just collected cans daddy yeah it's like he knows homer's drinking

that's such a mean thing to do like and it was also a very like specific reference to that it was a pull tab can that's right i pull off. Remember finding those in the woods and like, what the fuck are these things? They're futuristic kind of. A sticker based beer can. To defend Dave Simpson, it's like, well, he's letting his son have a beer with him while he gives him like the birds and the bees talk. Yeah. Just kind of refresh. There's a lot of courtship rituals now that are considered not cool.

I think the idea of marrying your high school sweetheart is also not cool for our generation, right? But there's also, well, there is also the thing that, like, for some reason, whenever you're trying to impress a woman, you're willing to become a better person for the first time in your life. I think that still exists. Yeah. And I love this, that immediately Homer's like, I gotta join the debate club or something.

Yeah, he finds out from the guidance counselor. That's what Mark is into. And so that leads to another first. A very big breach of the guidance counselor contract or whatever. Like, I'll tell you exactly what this girl does so that you can go do it too. Here's her address. Homer goes to him for love advice,

really, not for his own guidance. I didn't know if that was... That seemed to be a very specific reference, the idea of a guidance counselor for M through Z and A through L. No, that's the way he worked in my school. Did it really? Yeah. We had one guidance counselor in my school. and A through L. No, that's the way we worked in my school. Did it really? Yeah. We had one guidance counselor in my school.

There was not two guidance counselors split into the expertise alphabetically. See, I went to a big high school. Oh, rub it in, Dave. Our guidance counselor shaved her eyebrows off and then painted them on. So when she was talking to you, you could not even pay attention. It was just like, what's going on with your eyebrows? I have the worst guidance counselor story just because I saw my parents

meet him when he's like, hi, how's it going, Tom? And then we're walking by him just on the way out of lunch. I'm like, what's up, Tom? And he's like, hey! Hey! Not fucking Tom to you, man. Call me Mr. Bleb. I don't fucking remember your name, asshole, but it traumatized me

for a long time. He did. Wow, he way to pull rank, Tom. He totally pulled rank on a fucking elementary school kid. I've hated guidance counselors ever since. But he felt like a real big man. And then Jay Sherman shows up, right? See, that's the thing. I don't have that yet. But him joining the debate club, I love the sequence.

My name's Homer Simpson. I'd like to sign up for something. Well, we have an opening on the debate team. Debate? Like arguing? Yes. I'll like to sign up for something. Well, we have an opening on the debate team. Debate? Like arguing? Yes. I'll take that, you stinkpot! Just warming up, Mrs. Blumenstein.

This year's topic is Resolved. The national speed limit should be lowered to 55 miles per hour. 55? That's ridiculous! Sure, they'll save a few lives, but millions will be late! Why don't you take Con? I didn't have a good Lovitz clip of Zip because I liked his clips later on.

I think he becomes a better, funnier character. But Lovitz appears, well, in our show first, but he appears as just a random shop teacher in the middle of the episode. Oh, that's him, right. I had him for four years. Solid C student. Made a lamp last year.

Made a lamp last year. Wow, I never knew that was John Lovitz. To go get references on him from other people throughout the school. Yeah. And I only grabbed this clip because it was on every promo for this episode, which I was obsessed with having recorded it and thinking Homer might be dead. Look, I'm not asking you to like me. I'm not asking you to put yourself in a position where I can touch your goodies.

I'm just asking you to be fair. So that's, then soon comes, I feel like the first full shot of Homer's ass. Like, I guess he's naked in Simpsons. In the Call of Simpsons, yeah. He is nude, but you don't really see his butt. Like, in this one, that angle on his ass is like, it's near pornographic. They can't show butts anymore, as far as as I know thanks to the whole Janet Jackson thing.

Thank you, Janet. That happened 10 years ago or almost 12 years ago. Jesus Christ. Your barely visible nipple showed on National Television. Dear God, the world saw pasties. And Dan Castellaneta and John Lovitz have such great chemistry. It's fantastic, yeah. They are so good together.

It is excellent. And I do love their sequence when he realizes he can get to Marge because she's a French tutor and if I pretend I'm a French student. Also, I love the, it's not the most witty joke, but when Barney asks her friend out on a date, she's like good God, no! She says, I wouldn't go out with you

if you were Elliot Gould. That's another character. That also sounds like, that voice in particular in that sequence sounds like it's coming from a different room. I don of does, yeah. How we use electricity can be smarter, cleaner, and greener. At Electric Ireland, we can help guide you there. You see, our new Net Zero Hub has all you need to know about smart meter plans, EV tariffs, solar panels, and much more. Making your usage clearer,

your trips greener, your home cozier, and your world brighter. Find our net zero hub at electricireland.ie. Call this French connection. I love how it bleeds back into the present where the Simpsons are telling the story of the meeting. I tutor part-time.

You tutor? Yes. And anyone can be tutored? Just those who need help with French. French? back into the present where the Simpsons are telling the story of the meeting. Bard pang on the television. Well, that came one of my favorite lines of the episode, which is like, you may be telling this to your own son someday if something breaks. Now, my line is actually my line of the show. That's the joke. It just makes me laugh so much, because it's Lisa essentially acknowledging she's in a flashback episode.

Everything I know tells me this story doesn't end with us sitting here and you telling it to us. Well, so when Marge's French knowledge, like she lost all of that. She used to apparently know French so well that she could tutor. Well, her last name is Bouvier. Her last name is Bouvier. She just has a housewife, doesn't have any reason to use it. So that's a Kennedy reference. Of course, yeah.

I mean, of course. I don't understand. I mean, her mother's name is Jacqueline Bouvier. Yes, yeah. Jacqueline Kennedy's maiden name was Bouvier. So the joke that Marge is, she then later married Onassis, which pissed a lot of people off that she married that Greek guy so soon. Yeah.

This is the scandal of the 60s, but eventually Marge says yes to Homer. I can't believe it. It's sticking. You're telling me new stuff and minutes later it's still there. And it's all thanks to you. Marge, when I see you forming the vowels and consonants with your beautiful mouth and your beautiful breath pushing your breath, you're beautiful. You'll see, I guess. I like that, I guess.

That's cute. Would you go to the prom with me? You know, Homer, you're like no one I guess. That's cute. That's too stupid. This is a very 70s joke here. Disco Steve. Maybe I'll wear my hair. Up. Just that last bit. Solidify this is the most 70s episode of all time.

That's the origin of marge's hair i think that is a sweet yeah that she never puts it back down after that though that she wants to have a hairstyle exactly like her mom homer homer is also odd his biggest barrier to actually going on a date with marge is well he lies and right after that clip he immediately admits to it which is like too stupid to protect himself yeah i mean he's like if you like honesty here's some honesty and then marge immediately is just like and i love that she goes like pretending to be stupid yeah it was good acting though i wanted to mention when i did see some parallels in real life with this because uh you know marge knew french very well then and

didn't didn't seem to use it or have lost that skill in her as a mother my mom too she learned Spanish into college and that was one of her skills and now she barely has mastery of it anymore she just kind of let it go I took a lot of French classes other than Homer's own stupidity

who is the biggest barrier to heading to prom with Marge John Lovitz. John Lovitz playing Artie Ziff, who does his Occam. I think that's the first ever Occam. This may not be the most appropriate forum for what I'm about to put forth. He's been quoted at the show. But Occam, would you go to the prom with me?

Well, I can think of a dozen highly cogent arguments. Now, the first is from Time Magazine, dated January 8, 1974. America's love affair with the prom. Even wallflowers to look forward to one date a year. No, Artie, Artie. The best argument is that I've known and respected you for eight years and I would be delighted to go to the prom with you.

Am I just too manly to that is such a bizarre criteria to go and date someone. I've respected you for eight years. She thinks she's going on a date with a friend, clearly this will turn bad later. But she thinks, yeah, with a friend, sure. Especially after the Homer incident. The internet tells me that nice guys are just the poultry girls right.

I liked his 70s Jufro. It was really funny. How do you like mine? I did love homer's guess who's gonna date for the prom yeah we should point out homer uh marge walks out on homer and he does not question it because he feels like if he avoids her he'll still go to the prom with her i have dealt with problems like that for almost my entire life i mean there's something now called the fade out which like if you're just not interested in dating somebody, you just stop communicating with them.

But there is that weird period where it's like, wait, I guess I'm still dating this person. There's no closure here. I think this is a long time. This is the very earliest instance of the fade-out. But the whole thing with Artie, like, just from the Achim to him using a Time magazine quote, America's a love affair with a prom. Even wallflowers have one day to year. Webster's a fine prom. That was all just like,

that's my favorite scene of this entire episode. He's such a great character, and I only didn't grab a clip of him earlier because he gets great at the end, the worship, for sure. They mention how in the commentary, this is pretty much his audition for the critic. After they did this,

they're like, we want him back for more episodes of The Simpsons and maybe we just want to make a whole cartoon with this person. Yeah, he's one of the few people other than Phil Hartman who would go in to play, like, upwards of five characters, I think. Yeah, Willem Sinclair was one of them. There's actually a joke in, like, his 16th season appearance or whatever that all

of his characters hang out together. And, like, Al Jean and Mike Reese wrote this episode with Sam Simon and they would be the critic showrunners, too. Yeah, they're the critic showrunners. season appearance or whatever that all of his characters hang out together and like al gina mike reese wrote this episode with sam simon and they would be the critic showrunners yeah so you were talking about the what is the thing marge is talking about with a blind child and the more you help them the more you hurt them see like uh marge is very into the idea of like women not supporting men or women not being exploited but butterflies are freer about is about a it's about a man who is basically held captive by his mother because he is blind he was born blind and she

was taking care of him but he wants to strike it out on his own so it's like the mother is not being forced into the situation she's doing it of her own free will so marge is misinterpreting it because she read one magazine about feminism and it's such a low-key joke it took me this is like my 40th viewing of this episode it's only like written on the blackboard. Yeah, like Butterflies Are Free. So I looked it up and I was like, what's the synopsis of this movie? I imagine if you saw this in 91 and you were like 30, you wouldn't know what it was. Man, wow. I'm learning something right now.

I have no fucking idea. It is such a low-key joke. Like it is, it's still a joke, but you need to know what Butterflies Are Free are. And you need to understand what Marge's feminism is. The most 70s fucking movie title of all time. I do see this as kind of a sad story, though, that Marge, like, was a great student. Like, you can see that she's Lisa's mother in that. But just, like, her failing at this was kind of like the end of her academic career, pretty much.

She doesn't go to college. You're totally right. I feel like a later episode would underline the tragedy of her marrying Homer. Like, her life just, like, went off the rails here like this is a mistake yeah like he is george mcfly to uh lorraine right right like literally just took her off track yeah the apocryphal 90s show would say she went to college but that's right and then like oh god let's not talk about that anymore like never say apocryphal again this is supposed to be their first meeting but again this would get retconned in a later episode

that would show that Homer and Marge met when they were little kids. The blunder years, rather? Yeah, but they didn't know who they were. After this season, we will find out that The Simpsons are the worst at titling episodes ever. Oh, for sure. It is some of the worst comedy associated with The Simpsons. I did have a sub-line of the show, just for Mrs. Bouvier.

Oh, this is one of my favorites. That's the joke. If you pinch your cheeks, they'll glow. A little more. Try to break some capillaries, dear. Couldn't we just use rouge for this? Ladies pinch. Whores use rouge.

It shows you what Marge grew up into. You gotta hurt yourself in order to make it look like you've just been fucked. I'm sorry, I'm just gonna like... Assume a whore would use any makeup. That's her mom's way of thinking. Just the idea of broken capillaries in your skin, that's like people with blood.

That's not the urban legend, though. It's like men are supposed to be attracted to that because it looks like a woman just had the shit fucked out of her. That could have been it, yeah. If you're flushed, you're either aroused. I don't know. I'm just picturing her cheeks looking like a really drunk man's nose where all the blood vessels are broken.

Is that what she's going for on her face? I still never actually... You haven't mentioned it yet. I'm surprised. Correct me if I'm wrong. We see Marge's family, including her father. I wanted to point that out. His name is Clancy Bouvier. It was revealed this year how he died on The Simpsons.

Really? Yes. What is it? An episode called Puffless. It was revealed he died of lung cancer. Oh. Yeah, like in the writer's room, they're tossing around ways he could have died. Like he died on a roller coaster or something. It was never admitted on the show. and i both read simpsons illustrated and i remember in one of their comics the comic was that mrs bouvier came uh over to stay and lisa mentions i know we all feel bad since uh your your husband died in that roller coaster accident so i guess they use that joke there but like yeah and they

talk about it in the commentary that they had said that they pitched that as a potential thing but it always got caught yeah and we saw him as him as a flight attendant in the season six episode of Fear of Flying. As soon as he died of embarrassment. Don't look at me! I mean, lung cancer makes sense. He's lighting up like one of the worst cigarettes you can. Like a Tipperillo or something. He is really like the male version of Patty and Selma.

He's like, blah, blah. This is the very rare appearance of Marge's dad. You know, I usually insist on approving Marge's dates. From what she's told me, I'm sure you're a solid citizen. Thanks, Mr. B. It sounds like Marvin Monroe mixed with Burgess Meredith.

Also, speaking of Marge's sexuality, what Patty and Selma say is like, that's what you get if you don't put out that she gets bad dates. That would imply, unless Patty and Selma are wrong like, that's what you get if you don't put out that she gets bad dates. That would imply, unless Patty and Selma are wrong about Marge's sexual history, that would imply that Marge has only ever been with Homer. Unless she's cheated on him, she's never been with another man than Homer.

I've always assumed that, just because they met in high school and they both look like they're courting someone for the first time. It was a much simpler time, though. Then they seem to imply, well, it was like in the time, I think even in the 90s, the idea that Marge would have been with anybody before Homer, like the writers or society. Well, the commenters even say it was controversial that we said they had a child out of wedlock. Yeah. They didn't think they could get away with it. They also say in 1974, Tinder was just a post office box that you submitted things to.

I would like to fuck you, man. But Homer is not Marge's date, but he shows up anyway. So sad. Which is wonderfully pathetic. What are you doing here? You said you'd go to the prom with me. I also said I hated you, and we haven't even talked

since then. I was afraid you'd cancel our date, so I stayed away from you completely, even though I'd been skipping school for three weeks and graduating this summer. I hope. Homer was wrong. He did not graduate. They established that way later, though.

Oh, man, that's right. I totally didn't. Okay, yeah. Homer's estimation was wrong that he needed to finish that remedial science class. Was that episode The Front when he went back to school? Yes, it was The Front, which brought back Dondalinger as well. And by the way, in that episode, when they have their next 20th reunion, that would be in 2014. Oh my god. In that flash forward.

So we're now past that flash forward. I'm terrified now. But that's for two years from now. You see Homer with the plunger on his head again. There is also the best, my favorite Simpsons character comes up here. And it's not a character. Oh, that is another first. It is another first. That's Charles Bronson voice

it's the first time we've ever seen him I call him Hank Azaria's blue collar character let the good times roll this one writes novels I love this character's voice so much my favorite is just I wanted to fix those potholes on Main Street and to just show a cutaway of a guy driving a popcorn truck

into a hole and he just goes, oh. Here's the thing. On the commentary, they pointed out they wanted that to be one character because he appears later as a limo driver, much older, with the same voice. But then they just gave that voice to everybody. It was like wise guy voice. They referred to it as. I love this character. Hey buddy, where's your date?

She's with him. Ouch. So I guess you want me to take you home, huh? Hey, I paid for this car, I paid for this tuxedo, and I paid for the two dinners. We're going to the prom. Prom it is. Prom it is. But I don't put out. I love that voice

so much. It makes you so happy. Then we see the Larry Davis experience playing Yellow Brick Road. What is that a reference to, Larry Davis experience? I meant to look that up. I don't know what the reference is, but they just show up a ton. It feels like a very David Silverman-specific thing. I feel like that's just a David Silverman drawing.

He was like, oh, there's a band in here. I'll make sure it's the Larry Davis experience again. They were in the Babysitter Bandit episode, too, I believe. They were playing the do-do, do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do. Maybe they're just really early fans of Fridays and Larry David on Seinfeld. And that's where the bong line comes in too. Is that a bong?

I'm not complaining, but we've established that what kind of character is Marge? They do kind of play her as the new girl and the most popular girl in school. But she's been there for eight years. And she gets voted prom queen. Yeah, that doesn't make sense. The prom king and queen thing, that, that is weird that, like,

that Marge doesn't know Homer very well or vice versa, and that Artie got voted prom king. I feel like there's something in the script that suggests that the votes were stuffed or something last-minute changed with everybody else. Maybe Artie's stiff. Hail Queen Marge. Woo! Woo!

Long live the queen. Hello, classmates. It's so good. Instead of voting for some athletic hero or a pretty boy, you have elected me, your intellectual superior, as your king. Good for you. Good for you. Who else?

Maybe people liked Artie Ziff. You know, like she was riding the Ziff popularity wave. I can't imagine it. No, he's the most respected person. He doesn't get voted prom queen. It would damage the town. I definitely have that. I also have him singing.

Why do birds suddenly appear? Every time. Every time. You're near. Get out of here. I'm sorry for talking over that, but I love it. No, it's great. And then another heartfelt scene is like right afterwards, Homer has to talk to Marge.

Yeah. I've never been so sure of something, Marge. Why are you doing this? Why can't you accept that I'm here with someone else? Because I'm sure we were meant to be together. Usually when I have a thought, there's a lot of other thoughts in there. Something says yes, something says no. But this time, there's a lot of other thoughts in there. Something says yes, something says no. But this time, there's only yes.

How could the only thing I've ever been sure about in my life be wrong? I don't know. But it is. Such a stab in the heart. So many women have told me that. She's trying to let him down easy, though. She cares enough to at least talk to him. Though, as a story for, like, as a lesson to teach young men, it's like, well, yeah, maybe a girl did say that, but she actually will realize she loves you later.

If something bad happens with her current boyfriend. Yeah, and I just have this clip labeled as Artie is a rapist. Yes. Yeah, I mean, there was no George McFly to save Marge, so it would have to be Homer. Well, he at least came to his senses. That's true. Maybe when he gets slapped, he realizes, like, oh, I actually can't overpower her. I'll just stop.

Artie is hardly Biftenin. That's a much darker thought to have, that he's just like, oh, I will fail at sexual assault, so let's just stop. We'll say that the sound alone of this is more disturbing than watching it. Gee, Artie, Artie, wait, I don't know. I mean, it was a beautiful evening. Let's not ruin it. Artie, please. Come on, kiss me.

No, really, I mean it now. Stop it. I'm sorry, Marge. Take me home, Artie. Well, it's one o'clock. I love this line. If you want to keep me, I'm afraid it's going to be $45 an hour. No, that's okay. I'm broke.

I'll walk home. Yeah. Why spoil a perfect evening? I didn't know that an Uber driver is right in this thing. Dude, adjusting for inflation, 1974. That was a very expensive limo. It's a lot of money. It's a limo.

It's not a cab. It's a fancy stretch limo. But $45? I can't imagine anything I'd pay $45. I won't pay that much for a karaoke room. I liked earlier when Homer said to him, like, let's go to Inspiration Point. And he says, like, all right, but I've only paid to drive. I've only paid to drive.

I don't put up. Do you have the clip of when Artie and Marge were at Marge's doorstep? Of course. Please play that, Chris. It's not only great, but it's, again, the second. I'd like to think the second show on the road where a busy hands joke is made during a sexual encounter. It's my line of the show. Actually, one word is my line of the show.

That's the joke. I would appreciate it if you didn't tell anybody about my busy hands. Not so much for myself. But I am so respected, it would damage the town to hear it. Good night. Good night. night okay that was my line of the show good night good night it's like the ultimate john lovett's reading and it is stuck in my brain for 25 years i just think of that whenever i hear good night good night i'm rt ziff it's another commentary yeah that he would say good night i'm rt ziff i'm sad they cut that

part out because i feel like it would have underlined his nerdiness. It would damage the town. Damage the town. Damage the town to hear it. I'm surprised I already never went back and tried to date Patty or Selma. Yeah, he had a chance with them. They thought he was handsome and he thought they were handsome too. And hey, I gotta be honest, they looked pretty good in the 70s.

Yeah, they didn't look bad. They had the husky voices, which they developed at age 12 according to to a flashback who's to say he didn't have sex with that that's true but they didn't go back the next night for that but i also a line that always stuck me as a kid just the when homer goes over to the side of the road he goes all right all right so i have an extra long clip this is the end of the episode, but it's so beautiful it's a really good ending I'm going to ruin this for you, how did Marge find Homer? just drove around I guess Springfield might be a smaller town in the 70s

I thought they said that was he at Inspiration Point too? and he walked home from there but she would know he's from Inspiration Point but he walked back before they left, so maybe she saw him it's possible, it doesn't matter. I just wanted to be a jerk. Shut up. I'm over as far as I can go.

Alright. Alright. I'll walk in the mud. Stop. Stop. Stop. Homer? Marge? Yeah. You want a ride? Sure. You know, Homer, when I got home, I realized who I should have gone to the prom with. Who?

Oh. High prom day. March, poor boo. Why so glum? I got a problem. Once you stop this car, I'm going to hug you and kiss you. And then I'll never be able to let you go. And I never have.

That's what I was doing as a kid by that point. Me too. Cut to credits. Can I talk about the ending for this episode they didn't show? Yeah. That they wrote, but they just ended with bart gagging uh homer is like they talk about how how arty went to prison for like tax evasion or like insider training or whatever and homer's like no he can't vote and lisa's like but you don't vote that he's like that's because i don't want to and then the episode ends so that's what

the the show was originally gonna end like yeah it was you feel like you should get some more uh closure for Artie. This was such a big deal back then, though. Now we've seen 8 million Simpsons flashbacks and flash-forwards. I was going to say we should probably do an article at some point on Simpsons flashback episodes. How many have there been? Okay, so Hank, when they were watching these episodes, they were inspired doing the commentary. So in Season 14, Artie came back, and we find out he's obsessed with Marge, and he recreated their prom, and he flies her out to re-experience it.

It's like season 14, I believe. So that was season 14? No, no, no. That's the first time he comes back? I know. He's at the reunion. Oh, right. He's the reunion.

It's not voiced by Lovitz. It's Dan Kaisel and I doing the voice. Though they mentioned on the commentary they had just recorded that episode, so that episode did not inspire it. Okay. But they definitely, you can see them watching episodes like, oh, they clearly were

rethinking this stuff about The Simpsons. It was Al Jean who was writing and running the show. I would bet that happens more than you'd think. I bet Simpsons writers and producers don't actually watch season two episodes of the show until they do commentaries and they're reminded, oh, fuck, Artie Ziff. I'm glad about that guy guy on some of the later commentaries you hear about a trivia contest they

had with simpsons fans and like we're gonna blow them out of the water and then like they were destroyed by simpsons fans at trivia by the way like i i meant to mention this earlier like when they're at prom i guess if this was like a modern day episode homer would have like gotten contact with barney and like dude let's just just hang out at the prom together and drink. In fact, they are disconnected at the prom and Homer spends the entire night alone. You'd think at some point he would have been like, dude, Barney, let's drink.

I'm going stag tonight. Let's set this place on fire. Barney did streak referencing the famous Ray Stevens song. Yeah, but at no point did they ever like, let's hang out. We're best friends. Is that because that song's from 74? Because song appears for no reason i'm pretty sure yeah i mean like streaking was a fad remember the mr show sketch yeah dome yeah 97 fucking great just just that like he streaks for a second and then we hear the song the streak yeah needed to

be reminded well was the larry davis experience they're just like yeah like they were just like on the tonight show we're like, we should play a sting here. Running naked through a public crowd was a fad at some point. That's how low entertainment was. I don't know when this episode will air, so I'll just say R.I.P. Ray Stevens. Well, he might deserve it. Yeah, he's another one.

That could be a list, too, of celebrities who were broken by 9-11. Yeah. Well, he did make a song called Ahab the Arab a long time before that. That is true. So maybe it didn't break him. Yeah, it just empowered him. So I guess that was the way we was.

That was the way we was. In our longest episode ever. But I think if any episode merits, it is this one. They're only going to get longer after this. So as always, I'm your host, Bob Mack. You can find me at BobServo on Twitter. B-O-B-S-E-R-V-O I also write for USGamer and Something Awful and I do the Classic Gaming

Podcast Retronauts go to retronauts.com or usgamer.net or just search for it wherever you listen to podcasts it's a classic game podcast all these guys have been on it and you'll love it I'm out of breath everybody my name is Chris and I'm better than Bob and you can find me at Cant East on Twitter I probably won't answer anything until stuff clears up

but I also do a lot of work at LasertimePodcast.com including the Lasertime Show which is there and the weekly video game show Vigigant Apocalypse. So check that out at LasertimePodcast.com. And don't forget that if you like this but you haven't heard the first season, that's available only to patrons on Patreon.com slash

Lasertime. $5 a month gets you so many extras including the first 13 episodes of Talking Simpsons where we talk about the rough but fun first season. There's also a cheap podcast, LazerTime's Wrestling Podcast. If you're curious about the Russian Rasputin

and Warner Von Braun from that... Yeah, Truckasaurus episode. Yeah, there's a wrestling show on this network. It'll help you into it. Yeah, there's a wrestling show on this network. It'll help you into it. So, yeah, that's been Talking Simpsons. We'll see you next week, everybody.

Good night. Good night. of the poppy tools of love People talk about me, baby Yeah, I'm doing you wrong, doing you wrong, doing you wrong, doing you wrong Well, don't you worry, baby, don't worry Cause I'm right here, right here, right here, right here, right here