Taskmaster The Podcast - Ep 32. Margaret Cabourn-Smith - S11 Ep.9

Episode Date: May 13, 2021

On this week's podcast Ed is joined by the brilliant Comedy Actress and huge TM fan - Margaret Cabourn-Smith. As well as going through the latest episode they also discuss some of Margaret's favourite TM moments and her highlights from the current series.You can watch Series 11 of Taskmaster each Thursday on Channel 4 at 9pm.Get in touch with Ed and future guests:[e-mail] Visit the Taskmaster Youtube channelwww.youtube.com/taskmaster For all your Taskmaster goodies visit www.taskmasterstore.com  Taskmaster the podcast is produced by Daisy Knight for Avalon Television Ltd Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

It's winter, and you can get anything you need delivered with Uber Eats. Well, almost almost anything. So no, you can't get snowballs on Uber Eats. But meatballs, mozzarella balls, and arancini balls? Yes, we deliver those. Moose? No. But moose head? Yes. Because that's alcohol, and we deliver that too.

Along with your favorite restaurant food, groceries, and other everyday essentials. Order Uber Eats now. For alcohol, you must be legal drinking age. Please enjoy respons podcast. I'm Ed Gamble. Let's not beat around the bush. We're nearing the end of Series 11, guys. It's very sad, but look, it's exciting because we all started off, didn't we, thinking the first four episodes, Sarah Kendall has got this nailed. She is going to run away with this, but it's just getting closer and closer. People are coming out of their shell. They're showing what they're good at. There's people flourishing out there.

So it's getting more and more exciting as we get down to the last two episodes. Hopefully you've all watched the penultimate episode, episode nine, because that's what we're going to be talking about today in the Taskmaster podcast with the brilliant Margaret Caborn-Smith, who is my special guest. She is a wonderful actor, writer, comedian, podcaster. She's a podcaster in her own right. Taskmaster podcast with the brilliant Margaret Kaybourne-Smith, who is my special guest. She is a wonderful actor, writer, comedian, podcaster. She's a podcaster in her own right. She co-hosts the brilliant Do The Right Thing podcast, which I urge you to check out.

And as an actor, she's also appearing in the current series of Motherland. And you can check that out, BBC. Check it out on the iPlayer if you're busy bods. Now, for Taskmaster itself, of course, check that out on all four. It's on Thursdays at 9pm on Channel 4, all four to catch up. But if you have more sensitive ears in the house,

be they children, be they old people, be they Victorian prudes, you can get the bleeped versions on all four as well. And obviously, if you have any questions for us or you just want to insult me email us taskmasterpodcast at gmail.com and maybe one of your emails might get read out to one of our special guests but let's crack on with it as discussing episode 9 of series 11 of Taskmaster it's my special guest Margaret Kay Bourne-Smith. Welcome, Margaret, to the Taskmaster podcast. Hello. I'm very excited to be here.

Well, thank you very much for coming on. It's like Christmas. I couldn't sleep last night. I was so excited. You were so giddy and excited, or you were dreading it. Either way, the sleep was interrupted. I don't dread Christmas. What sort of person do you think I am? Well, I guess it depends what you've got planned for the Christmas, right? Yeah. There's the excitement of Christmas in general. And then if there's lots of people coming over or you're in charge of cooking the turkey. Yes.

And I do buy a lot of bad presents. Well, there we go. You know, all night garage sort of thing. Yeah. Well, hopefully we're going to discuss series 11, episode 9. Hopefully you've not brought any of your takes on the tasks from an all night garage. You know what? Halfway through that, I thought this isn't good.

And then for a second, I was like, actually, it might be quite good. Yeah. I think we landed on it being quite poor. I think you sell it. Yeah. I liked it. Sold it. Absolutely.

Now, of course, occasionally on this podcast, we have people who've not been on the show yet, but are fans of the show. Now, you've told me many, many times you are going to prove yourself to be a mega fan of Taskmaster on this podcast. I am a proper, proper mega fan, yeah. I sent Alex a sort of fan email, which is weird because I know him. You're not supposed to send fan mail to people you know. But I honestly had a thing where I was just in lockdown and thinking, this has so been a saviour.

Like, my whole family love it, to the point where it's saved quite a lot of, you know, conversations. You can just put it on if there's an awkward silence. No, we can talk about it. We can, we can discuss, you know, if there's, if there's an argument brewing, you can just say, have you seen Taskmaster? Yeah, it's very difficult to argue if Taskmaster's on or you're talking about Taskmaster because it's so silly and so sort of frothy and almost meaningless in a very fun way. What? You know what I mean.

No, I do know what you mean. You know what I mean. So it's very difficult to sort of, you know, get angry or dark. Well, I'm assuming you can manage it ed being oh yeah level of competitive that oh god yeah i yeah i turn i turned it dark i mean your face when you were um dealing with david baddiel on stage during the the pictionary round or whatever it was was i mean it's burned on my brain it's so little competitive boy having a meltdown yeah i was yeah very angry at david i mean david's such

an interesting guy isn't he because there is that david we know now whereas before we only knew the the hyper intelligent david and now he's back to being hyper intelligent david you know he's releasing very interesting books he's you know he's talking about some you know pretty pretty deep topics at the moment but all I can think of now is just like is a lasso covered in spoons yeah he is many layered is David yes so yes you're a fuck you're a fan of the show do you have any particular highlights do you have like a favorite series favorite contestants favorite tasks what what if someone says to you tell me something about Taskmaster what's the

first thing that occurs oh well I mean obviously Joe Wilkinson and the potato that's what's although apparently I was saying this, my husband tells me that there's new footage this is like proper conspiracy levels, new footage that shows he didn't actually tread on the red green it's a different camera angle

like the Zaparuda footage yeah there's going to be a whole netflix documentary about it yes i love the idea but i mean uh you know the the watermelon was the watermelon the very first task like watching romesh smashing yeah i think that was the first task yeah yeah i mean i think i think you could just dip into it at any point yes say you know get involved now i know I know yes we've got watermelon we've got potato but I know you're a mega fan so I know you've got some more obscure

ones tasks that you enjoyed the most well they're probably the series and I'm and no offense and I did love love your series it's fine it's not it's never fine please it's fine i've got the trophy i've got the trophy in frame yeah um the what i could watch james a custer losing it with rod gilbert's yeah all day long all of those group tasks i mean i really enjoy i also really enjoy it when properly alpha people are really bad at things. Because there's nowhere to hide. And I've really enjoyed this series with Lee as well. But Lee and Rod and people who are just not used to looking like mugs.

And watching them just be appalling at things. Because that is the good thing about Taskmaster is there's nowhere to hide. Everybody's bad at something on Taskmaster. Even the weirdly sporty people like Noel Fielding and Russell Howard. You're a bit like, oh, come on. Why have you got ball skills? You're a comedian. It's annoying.

Like watching Noel Fielding playing keepy-uppy in his cowboy boots. It's like, piss off. Come on. Be bad at something. Yeah. And you're right. There's always, it's always around the corner for them to be bad at something I just remember when Russell Russell like they did the dart throwing thing in series six oh and he was just amazing at it and then there were some other things he was really good at sports wise and then you're like no I want to I want to see you fail mate But then my favourite bit of that series is Lisa Talbuck in the studio bit going,

oh, just call your manager. Because that was the episode in which he rung his manager to get him an Uber somewhere. Yep, unbelievable. And you're like, no, that is not the spirit of the show. Well, me and Russell have the same manager and I suspect if I had tried that, it would have gone straight to voicemail

so this current series we're on episode 9 we're nearing the end of it. Do you have any favourite contestants? Is there anyone you're rooting for in this series? Well, I genuinely, this series almost more than any other, I keep thinking they're my favourite and then thinking, oh no, they're my favourite, they're my favourite. Jamali's the one that I don't know at all and I think he might be my all-time favourite contestant because nobody has been like him nobody has played the game like the very first episode where I can't remember what he said

but something that was just completely like just took the wind out of Greg's sails and you could just see Greg going oh my oh what is this this is not something he's like a sort of trickster god or something yeah he's completely but what I love about it is it's completely authentic do you know what I mean I think that there are people because I often think oh my career would be better if I just just cared a bit less if I just seemed a bit cooler but the truth is that doesn't work you need to actually be that cool you need you just need to be your natural self right and that's that's him yeah yeah exactly he is just an anarchist at heart yeah he's just he's just

quite happy to just immediately fuck things up just whatever he does well I'll never forget polite with it as well he is very polite he's a lovely boy um but he genuinely doesn't give a shit most of the time yes and the episode i think it was episode six because i think it was overshadowed by mike's ass but um it's it's where he stamps on everything which we've talked we've talked about on the podcast before but it's just incredible that he didn't know they were all going to be stitched together in that episode those tasks so he just happened to be stamping on everything this episode as well didn't he i'm sure he stamped on something i'm sure he stamped on something yeah yeah yeah yeah but that's the thing but the nice thing about it is it never seems to be out of rage like he doesn't seem to have a kind of built up you know repressed anger it's just like oh you

just you just stamp on it it's just the quickest way you can do something. Give him the opportunity. Stamp on it. And the wallet, the wallet where he discovered everything. I mean, my daughter and I, we were way more excited than he was. Yeah. Oh, can you imagine? He was like, yeah, fine. Being on the show and discovering that. Yeah. I mean, I think we'd both lose our minds, wouldn't we, if we did that?

Absolutely lose. Yeah, because I love it when that happens as well. I'm always, you know, I'm always gutted when people don't find that you know the the under the table one the richard osman yes the bridge the bridge yeah the bridge building thing i was so desperate for somebody to find it out and also the um the sugar and salt reveal yes it's just it's what you want. You want one person to work it out. That's the most fun thing that can happen. I wonder whether in the sugar or salt one,

if they hadn't worked it out, would they have told them or would they have just... I've been thinking about this as well because it just wouldn't have been very fun. I mean, Alex must have been watching that going, please somebody, somebody work it out because it just would have been like oh right yeah so i wonder if there's any other tasks out there where there was a trick of solving them

but they never revealed it because it just wouldn't have it wouldn't have worked out we should we should yes i feel bad because i am friends with alex uh and i get on with them very well but all of my texts are like alex can I ask a question about this most recent episode of Taskmaster? The prize task. The prize task. Nattiest, nattiest knitwear. Now, Margaret, first question for you. How would you define natty?

I think it's an incredibly difficult thing to define. Well, Ed. Yes. question for you how would you define natty i think it's an incredibly difficult thing to define well ed yes because i'm a big show off and i have wi-fi yeah i'm like jamali i have the internet yeah i've got the definition here great let's hear it okay smart sharp dashing elegant trim neat fashionable stylish trendy british informal and then it gets more like chic spruce dapper it's old-fashioned yeah that's the thing i think it's old-fashioned cool yeah it's something you can imagine a nan saying right they say oh that's natty natty yeah yeah it's almost wartime isn't it yeah so something that would impress your nan but so yeah so something so something smart or like jazzy i guess like maybe a bit colorful yes but not too modern and snazzy

no exactly i'm picturing 70s nothing yeah more recent than so given that definition oh it's hard i don't think what would you many of them actually did it oh i think none of them did it i think I think many of them actually did it. Oh, I think none of them did it. I think Charlotte was closest, so I'm all right with her. With the knitted nose warmer. Because it was horrible, but I suppose you could say this is cool. Lees was just a horror show. Well, yeah, let's talk about Lees because he got four points for this.

It is not natty at all. It was horrific. he's got four points for this it is not natty at all it's horrific there was a wig oh sewn sewn onto the the face jumper it's horrible what is that it's sort of yeah cozy cozy and horrific like yeah it was like a sort of um midsummer murder or something yeah like a christmas like uh Chainsaw Massacre. That's the vibe that gave off. It was really like something from The Purge.

It was really uncanny, wasn't it? I did not like it. Yes, somebody saying, can we do The Purge for kids? Yeah. Yes, all right, this is how we dress them. Yeah, no. He was very lucky to get four points for that. Did not enjoy that one bit. Yeah, I think, no, and I think it's got to the point in the series

where everybody's a bit scared that Lee might think, no, and I think it's got to the point in the series where everybody's a bit scared that Lee might actually, like, shoot up the place. Yeah. So I feel like Greg's being a little bit gentler with him. In the studio, yeah. I think Lee's the most unhinged, isn't he? Yes, yeah. I think he is.

Yeah, a lot of repressed rage. Also, I think Greg has an innate respect for lee anyway yeah well they're both that alpha thing aren't they yeah like you wouldn't want to see greg on taskmaster because he would look like a lion in a cage you know like a big sad lion you want to see him being king of everything and you know terrifying people that oh right that's going to stick with me forever now you know when you hear a description of someone you're like i'm never going to forget that i'm going to think about it every time i see them an old lion in a bad zoo we're like oh i can't see the lion i can't see like oh no look behind there he is

looks like he's been crying for a decade. Just coming up and butting the glass. Mike's Greg Davis balaclava. Again, not natty, but a nice idea. Yeah. Now, I'm usually a big fan of Mike's, you know, prize tasks. Yes. Especially, but this was, it's a little bit puby you know it was like it was a bit gross and also he didn't see it was it greg because greg doesn't have those straggly

beer you know black beard thing but the eyebrows were good yeah the eyebrows the eyebrows are really what mucks mucks yeah it's greg really but yes you're right about the puby thing they're just not enough gray hairs on there to be a full head of hair or a beard so they were just single strands it was very odd yeah exactly the frog jumper bit bit lame it was a bit lame but if we're taking that definition of natty that's actually the most natty yeah you're right you're right if that had a matching blazer for example then that because i'm imagining like a 70s three-piece knitted suit or something that's what i think is definitely yeah oh natty i'm just imagining a nan going down the line and looking

at everything and the nan would probably the frog jump we'd've got oh that's natty yes a froggy no you're right you're right that should have probably been but it was what did it get in the end it got two points i mean it was the most it was probably the most boring standard yeah yeah because at least jamali was honest i really about not knowing what natty was he couldn't be bothered to look it up so he just got a jumper and well he said he embroidered Natty across it. Do you think he didn't embroider it? Because that embroidery was really impressive. Yeah.

That to me absolutely stinks of getting one of the production team to do it. Because he said that was his jumper. Lee called him out on that straight away. It's like, there's no way you own that jumper. He's like, no, I did. I do own that jumper. It's one of my favourite jumpers. I've never seen Jamali wearing knitwear.

You've ruined this. I was really impressed. But that's classic Jamali, I think. Just the, yeah, I couldn't really be bothered to look it up. So let's just whack Natty across her. I loved hearing him on this podcast saying, it's good money, but it's not good enough for homework. Yeah.

And it's so funny for people like you and me who are like, oh, please, please give me more to do. I'd like to spend all of my living day and night doing more tasks for you. Honestly, I didn't know what natty meant. Yep. You could have asked someone. Yeah, I could have, but, you know, I was at home.

Have you got internet? No. OK. No, there's no internet in my house. No internet, no phone. No, sorry, Greg, we don't all live like you. Task one, make the most impressive and realistic weather for Taskmaster Island.

You have 30 minutes and your weather must last for no more than eight minutes. Your time starts now. Good task. the island you have 30 minutes and your weather must last for no more than eight minutes your time starts now good even you saying this it makes me oh god oh god oh god oh i mean extra points in my heart for lee because anyone who actually hurts themselves during a task yeah i'm like yes yeah yeah you've actually injured yourself you've actually you've come out hacking out of the back you know he's probably taken a few hours off his life oh for sure inhaling all of that absolutely did you have any instant thoughts when when the task came up did you think I know what I'd do or I know the sort of thing that I'd go for I

I was thinking my immediate thought was I've always wanted to let off one of those fire extinguishers that has the foam in it. And I don't know if they have those in the house, but that is what, that's what I'd go for immediately. And what weather would be... We must look like some weather, I don't know. A huge lump of foam falling from the sky. Well, I mean, it's better than those ice cubes.

The ice cubes looked rubbish. Yeah, they did. All of the ice cubes looked rubbish. So I felt like, no, that might be a snowfall, mightn't it? I mean, if there was a snowstorm like that, I think it would be on the news, wouldn't it? It'd be the headline news. You're right, it's more like an Ibiza foam party.

It's a foam party, yes. an abyss foam party it isn't weather Charlotte was trying to say that a rainbow and a tsunami weren't weather and I would argue that they they definitely are weather aren't they I think they're the res are they the result of weather I guess you could say okay all right yeah so you would need the the weather that causes them but then i think there's you know mike did the rainbow of course so yeah um but so lee's the lee mac hurricane p super yeah only got one point but i i quite liked it i totally agree i thought it was it was and it was really different the others all had things in common i thought and he was like oh this is thinking outside the box i don't know if he was being punished for

the fact that it was a bit of an accident but it was it was an accident and he talked himself out yes of it being weather halfway through saying it was pollution and then out loud said oh no i better not say that i better not say that um so i think that was but that was part of it but i i think he had one idea one good idea and stuck to it whereas the others threw everything at it that they possibly could yes yes so I think it was a bit harsh to only give him one point yeah I agree I think he should have had four four points well I thought yeah no I mean actually I did like Jamali's it was hilarious when Jamali started it I just before he did anything I was like he's setting fire to this oh yeah he's a hundred percent setting fire to this i assume that every single

task that jamali had to do he tried to get fire into it yeah i mean i assume that was that was his own blowtorch that he just had in his pocket he just whipped it out his pocket i i think i respected jamali's the most i mean i can see why it was two points because it was not realistic weather in the slightest no but it was good it was it was impressive i mean when those hailstones came down i pissed myself laughing yeah and i felt like they were um i mean what was it coal or something i think it was um gravel from outside on the drive he just went and got a bucket of gravel and then just dumped it on. But they also looked like massive cockroaches or something.

Like it was properly biblical. Yeah, really apocalyptic. I mean, what I enjoyed during that was, I always like it when you can sort of hear Alex thinking, oh, we're going to have to, you know, buy more of this stuff. Because he's ruined it all. If it was me, I'd be be like jamali has to do everything last because that's what i felt yeah that's the thing you can always see it on alex's face when that

yeah you have broken this yeah yeah it's when lisa tarbuck again getting another shout out when they had to send the little man on a journey in series six and she had the little man run over and they cut back to the studio and Alex went, that was our only little man. That was our only, it's such a sad catchphrase. Yeah. That was our only little man.

I was a huge fan of Sarah in this task as well because of the saying out loud, I think we need a blizzard and then going... Yeah, blizzard! Yeah, that's a proper... Yeah, she could have merch with that on. Yeah, blizzard. And then also during the task,

when she was doing the weather, shouted at the top of her voice, shit, guys! Which, absolutely loved that. Yeah, she was good at being God. Yes. Oh yeah. She takes it so seriously.

I've got so much respect for that. Yes. Like the only, the bit where she was, you could see she was really enjoying herself. Like this in a different episode with the, when she was making Alex have that Fanta soaked meal that she made. And she was probably giggling.

And I was like, oh, she is having a good time because the rest of the time she's so serious. It's like she's doing this as a job. And you can really see it on her face when she's disappointed in what she's done as well. Yes, oh, it's heartbreaking. She's probably angry at herself when she messes it up. Mike did thunder lightning

and then tried to do a real rainbow and then had i mean the most pathetic backup rainbow i've ever seen now i think he got four points for this i think he's massively overscored massively massively overscored and like i feel like he listen if he'd achieved a genuine rainbow yeah then then he'd have absolutely yeah five points definitely would have um would have managed that but that yeah he was so just having that idea isn't enough to get it's not enough and especially when you fall back on what's it three pieces of gaffer tape and crouching behind the table looking so sad. He looked like it was a search warrant or something. Or a business card that he was just waving really pathetically. Oh, please, I'm like Wozniak.

Yeah, emergency rainbow. Yeah, it's like someone suddenly said, we're going to pride you need a flag and he just panic made one yes yeah it wasn't realistic if we're marking jamali down for not being realistic then you need to mark mike down as well yeah and at least jamali's was like couldn't give a shit just dump a load of stones but also also jamali's was realistic because like in california now fire is a season like they're like oh yeah yeah yeah now it's the fight you know summer that's fire season and that's what's on the weather so i would argue that fire is a weather

i i think you're maybe being slightly generous because the fire in california as far as i'm aware is not in the sea well you say that but i remember my dad worked in cleveland for a bit and he's he came home once and he said yeah but it's not the greatest place the river caught fire this weekend oh my god yeah so it is so polluted that can't happen that must be what jamali was referencing there yes if only your dad working in cleveland we should talk about charlotte because it was five points for Charlotte and I think she deserved it. I agree. I thought it was brilliant. I thought, did she do something with the lighting that

was different? It was the light. She turned the light off and then flashed a torch through the water so it really looked like lightning. Phenomenal. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But that absolutely was the key to it was Because any other light that the others did was just, yeah. Yeah, because they left the lights on. So, yeah, like Mike was flashing the torch. But if you flash a torch when all the other lights are on,

it just doesn't look that good. No. And for a man who's trying to create a rainbow, he should have known that, really. And, yeah, she put the hose through the colander and just shows you where I'm at in my life, that my first thought there was, I've got that colander.

I've got it downstairs in my cupboard. Did you go and get it? Yeah. Just waving it at my laptop. When they do the Taskmaster tour, you can all take your colander along. I've got that colander. You know what I'll do?

I'll mention that on a podcast. Unbelievable. She was having a great time as well. I like seeing Charlotte do well at stuff that colander i'll you know what i'll do i'll mention that on a podcast unbelievable um she was having a great time as well i like seeing charlotte do well at stuff and have a great time rather than do badly and panic which seems to be her normal state it's those big eyes yeah filling with tears yeah so yes another five points for charlotte that's uh that's two five points in a row like a different contestant yeah she's finally yeah she's found her voice yeah episode nine a little bit late Charlotte but you know all power to you uh but I really liked it in her episode of the podcast when she was like saying that she was watching herself and just going just something. It's been seven episodes. Why are you just taking this?

I really felt for her. And instead she just looks horrified that people are being so mean to her. Yeah. I mean, it's an awful experience anyway having to watch back your tasks because you know what you've done and you can't do anything about it.

So you're watching yourself going, why did you do that? But to then have that watching the studio as well, watching yourself, watching yourself, and thinking both these versions of me aren't doing what I want them to. Oh, what have we got? We've got rain. Sun.

Snow. We've got snow. Say snow. I was going to maybe make it rain and wind. Maybe snow. Snow might look better. Rainbows. It's not weather.

Do you have a fan? Tornadoes. Hurricane might look better. Rainbows. It's not weather. Do you have a fan? Tornadoes. Hurricane. Twisters. Whirlwind. Tidal waves. That's not weather either. And I might even set up a hair dryer as well because then it can be like a blizzard.

Yeah, a blizzard. You can get anything you need with Uber Eats. Well, almost, almost anything. So no, you can't get snow need with Uber Eats. Well, almost, almost anything. So no, you can't get snowballs on Uber Eats. But meatballs and mozzarella balls, yes, we can deliver that. Uber Eats, get almost, almost anything. Order now. Product availability may vary by region.

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Join us at yorku.ca slash write the future. Task two, build a tower, then topple your tower so the yogurt lands in a numbered square you have one yogurt and one toppling attempt highest score wins you have 20 minutes your time starts now i would have found this so stressful margaret oh my god would you have enjoyed it no i would have found it really really stressful as well i. I think, I don't know about you, I wouldn't have bothered doing any measuring at all. You know, they're trying to work out how high this is going to be. It's obviously going to be really hard to build any tower at all.

Just start. You know, I was stressed with the people, you know, laying out their little tube. I mean, actually, watching Charlotte's boxes blow away was particularly tragic. Oh, God. All of her stuff's just gone now. Any building stuff just fills me with dread.

Just having to build stuff and then it falling apart and then, ugh, horrible. Especially when you know that the stuff they've provided is shit. Useless. Absolutely useless. Lee's was amazing. The folding of the cardboard inside the tubes. Yeah. That seemed properly effective.

I don't know if I'd have got there. I definitely would have made a few boxes. I would trust Lee with DIY, I think. Yes. But weirdly, Jamali, I mean, when Jamali started, I was like, oh, this is fit. This is really fit. I suddenly thought, I remember that he built a tattoo gun out of like yes yogurt pots or whatever like a prison tattoo

gun yeah yeah amazing and then i bet anyone doing anything competently i find attractive yes i don't see enough of it in my life um well there wasn't a huge amount of that going on in this task, to be fair. No. Yeah, it didn't last long. Well, poor Jamali had to do it in the pouring rain, which I always think is unfair. So in our series, every time Rose had to do something outside, it was raining.

Every day she was there, it was raining. Oh, my God. Well, she did well considering then. Yeah, and i felt bad for her now at the time i was like yes yeah i'm gonna win this but god yeah i remember tim key trying to do trying to do a picture in the rain yes and was it the horse was it the horse one no it was the the one where he had to you had to draw something using a sat-nav sort of thing? Yes, yeah, yeah, I remember, yeah. And I think he said it was the worst day of his life.

And I sort of get that. I mean, wet cardboard as well. Yeah, nightmare. Like, cardboard's not great for building anyway. No. Wet cardboard is, yeah. Especially when you're Jamali and you don't really care anyway. Yes.

So when also the conditions are bad, like, he's not going to try, he you just want to you just want to go and when Alex told him to say please I did think if that was me I'd be I'd be kicking his shins at this point I'd be gone I'd be walking off attacking him with wet cardboard I need a car home now um Sarah uh got four points um she I mean she did a pretty good job and i think she deserved those four points for uh is it yoga or is it poo yes yeah yeah she went for it she really looked like um a four not four person as well i really felt like she had the attitude of yeah definitely yeah she did she has that authority doesn't she yes yeah um this is the

second time she's just popped something in her mouth to check there's the salt and sugar task when she when she realized when she tasted it was like oh and now she's like she's like a detective who solves crimes by tasting things with her tongue yeah oh yeah and she did some weird tongue prodding on the batter test as well is it yogurt or is it poo i mean luckily happy to test it yeah because she could have got alex to test that couldn't she oh yeah poor guy that's i love that's your first thought definitely get alex to test if it's yogurt or is it poo it poop at the end of every task get Alex to lick something prove something Charlotte

another five points for her for getting a tiny bit I mean this is very much one of those ones where if you're doing a task you've got to persevere even if you're doing terribly because you just hope everyone else did way worse than you. Yes, yeah. Five points for being the least bad I knew as soon as she got

a bit of into four i was like because i could see from the start this is going to be one of those ones yeah that is just almost impossible to achieve yeah because well as lee and mike proved um lee i mean it was a spectacular failure you could see as soon as it started falling that it was just going off to the left and he still had the temerity to shout at Alex and say did you touch that halfway down because it was going straight on. It wasn't. You could see the replay. It was never going straight. It was always falling out. Yeah his rage. I mean yeah I think the Northern Farmer character is absolutely spot on. He's got's got a real tony martin about him you know do you know i really feel like he might have shot some people for going onto his property

and i loved the blaming of alex and i can absolutely imagine doing that as well because i felt like charlotte was close because i tell you the, the only reason that I wouldn't want to do Taskmaster is that I would definitely cry at some point. It would be utterly humiliating. But there's some points where you're just so weak. Like she's, what does she say? It's like, there's that then or something. As she left, she was like, that's that then.

And bye-bye. It's just so heartbreaking. As she left, she was like, that's that then. And bye-bye. It's just so heartbreaking. And I know I'd have my eyes filled with tears. Like Catherine Lyne cried in her, you know, when she was trying to describe what she doesn't get about sport. It's that thing of like being upset and frustrated about something and feeling like, oh God, I think I might cry. And then remembering how stupid it is. And that makes it worse in a way. You're like, oh God, I'm so upset. and frustrated about something and feeling like oh god i think i think i might cry and then

remembering how stupid it is and that makes it worse in a way you're like oh god i'm so oh my god so pathetic i i cried i mean i cried with my doing some bowling with my family a few years back like you know mid-30s me and my and my 13 year old niece both had a bit of a cry because we were bad at bowling. Bad at bowling. This is so embarrassing. But then you're crying because of the embarrassment as well. Yeah, exactly. Oh God.

Yeah. Well, Catherine Parkinson looked like she was going to cry in the studio every week. Yeah. No, I thought she was. Yeah. All the time. Really funny. Mike found the ladder.

Oh, the parable of Wozniak in this yeah see I think that's I think that's one where they might have left it they might have if they if they hadn't found the ladder I think I'm not sure they would have shown that the ladder was in there agreed agreed yeah but he still he still managed to fail I loved him saying it made me arrogant and complacent absolutely i thought i had the keys to the kingdom that's very good he was like you know in um uh a disaster film he's like a disaster film in the 70s where it's somebody who's whose incompetence destroys lives but you're sort of still rooting for him yeah he's so he's so nice like get yourself to a safe place. Oh, so funny. It's just so, so sweet.

And there's so many words to fit into that small... Yes, as an instinctive thing. Watch out, Shirley. Yeah. Yeah, or watch out, it would have been fine, but get yourself to a safe place. I did. I was once in Bristol with my then boyfriend and he was a student there and he was like, oh, I remember, I know this thing that you'd like.

And he took me to this big, this big rock that's been sort of smooth glassed over because students always sliding down and he said, you'll love this. And I was like, yes, yes. And I threw myself off this thing. And as I was sliding down, we both realised at the same time to stop students doing this they'd concreted the bottom but as I went I shouted involuntarily I shouted I'm going to hurt myself and bless him he didn't until he found out it was all right I mean then he pissed himself laughing for about half an laughing that's amazing what comes out isn't it yes so embarrassing it's like oh that's what's that's i'm going to hurt myself that's quite wasn't it yes done it in a more victorian way but yeah and yeah as greg said if you'd made all that effort and then the yogurt falls all over your back i would have lost it and mike went with hoopla yeah but i really felt like he immediately thought i deserved that yeah i deserved

that forgetting complacency yeah okay now i i had some this is the one i had questions about about trying to find little hacks and things to things to do don't think, I think quite often I think about these when I'm watching the show. If I was actually doing it, I would have just started trying to build a terrible wet cardboard tower. Could you, okay, a few things. The steps that were there,

that were there ostensibly to, so you could build a tower. Could you use them? Exactly. Could you put a tiny, could you put the yogurt top on top of that and push all of the steps over you're right i felt like oh that is that a test this is some sort of because

i felt like they were a mockery anyway those steps like the idea that yeah we're going to use that you know get an amazing tower that they needed to go up to the top of that but although i suppose mind you once you have the ladder i mean that you know the thing that mike that Mike found. Yeah, that should have been it really, shouldn't it? I don't know. Well, you're the one who's done it. Would they have let you? Because it was quite a dangerous, big old metal. They don't really mind that.

Oh, they'd have been fine with that. Alex, you stand there. I'll knock this onto you. This is the task where, I i mean people have been most angry with alex i think yeah quite rightly yeah well when he said when he said to sarah it just hasn't been built very well i was like i think i would have you know claws claws into his face like probably jumping on his back he gets sassier and sassier yeah yeah he really does also i think they cut out quite a lot of his sass as well because i think

he's really he's so cheeky during those tasks and then occasionally one really lands and then but yeah he really likes to wind i mean i'm easily wound up so he doesn't need to do much to me would you be would you be angry would you be an angry person if you were doing it or just frustrated i think it might turn into anger if if i felt like he yeah the sass thing that yeah sort of troubles me if he said it's just not a very well well built i would have been like you fucking try it and the the jet but the gesture where but then the gesture that he did to lee where he does the sort of no whatever that gesture is called yeah um i think i would have found that funny though like i really found it funny how angry lee was because i think that's about the sportsman yeah lee and yeah totally and alex enjoying the sports sign language.

But that to me was like, he's just like, you've got some yoghurt that hasn't landed in a square and you're trying to make this into a sporting event. That's amazing. When do you think you might start building? Look, mate, you need four hours to chop down a tree. I'm going to spend three hours sharpening the blade task three this is great i love this one uh look the most different in four

photos taken by the camera the camera will spin around three times and we'll take a picture every time it faces the frame you must not hinder the camera or the spinning mechanism in any way you must be in all four photos most varied set of photos wins the camera will start spinning in 20 minutes from now i love how long the tasks are getting now because they clearly have decided obviously yeah what they want is four photos from everyone of you know everyone doing something different that's the task that's what the funny stuff is they know what the goal is but they just want to stop people going well what if i stop the camera they just want to stop jamali setting fire to it. You may not stamp on the camera in any way.

This is great. You would have enjoyed this one as well, right? I would have absolutely loved it, yeah. The dressing up, the theatricality, yeah. Yeah, amazing. I sort of felt sorry for sarah because she's so distinctive you know she's not going to be a master of disguise she looks like uh you know how um they say that the best cartoon characters you can tell what they are from the silhouette the

silhouette yeah they are from the silhouette and sarah has that yeah she really does yeah you know she's gonna and she did really well like her cousin it style yeah exactly she you're right she had to rather than do different characters it was just her in different situations it was like um stances yeah like really bad old uh actors headshots yes and this is me with a hat yes me with the moustache In fact, it's like, you know, in Arrested Development, Tobias Fionke has his headshots and I think there's one of him as a tennis player or like him like doing loads of different things.

Yeah, the sweatband is a classic. Like, oh, who's this? With part of their forehead missing. I don't know who they are. I'm looking for a guy with a sweatband on in my new TV show that's perfect um yeah i mean we've had sarah on the podcast and she does yeah she said most of the messages she's received from people are about her hair and i don't think that's going to stop anytime soon

when she pulled the whole thing over her face and put her glasses on and then it was just an amazing moment where she just pushed it all back and just. Yeah. She's like a lion. I mean, you know. Yeah. Well, she's a young lion. She's not the sad old lion.

Yeah. She's the new one they've introduced in the cage. She's in her prime. Yeah, exactly. They've popped her in the cage and it's made the big sad lion even sadder. But I thought Sarah's was pretty good. Lee's was pretty good too. I I mean I think Lee couldn't explain I think he panicked like melon breast lobster penis you can't really explain what that is right I don't really understand what the penis bit like I think was it supposed to be grit like a

lobster had attacked his crotch I don't know why then he had the melon breast was it supposed to be was it supposed to be i really hope he gets people following him around art galleries and whatever asking what was that was it supposed to be that a lobster had attacked your penis there's an amazing there's an amazing story um in dawn french's autobiography where she says that the first time that she saw her dad's dick, she'd never seen one before, so she thought that his dick was a little monster attacking him and she went and grabbed it

and tried to pull it off. Can you imagine? Oh, great. That's so funny. Absolute horror. You'd be cutting yourself. It's going to change the way I see penises from now on. Yeah, good.

Because his other characters were slightly more recognisable. Yes. The builder, superhero and, of course, West Country Woman on a cow. Cow bitch. Which I loved. Yeah, I did as well. Also to drag the cow over.

Yes, a lot of weird effort there. Yeah. Certainly more effort than Jamali put in oh my god that the final photo of jamali made me laugh i think more than more than anything else so it really looked like you know his nan had said oh jamali we don't have any nice photos of just you looking like jamali and he was was like, all right, I'll do this. He really understood that that somehow that was more different than anything. Like an impressionist going, and this is just me. Then he was like, I took my glasses off.

It would almost like, I would have been let down if he'd made an effort. Oh yeah, no, it would have been embarrassing. He's perfectly in persona is exactly what you want from jamali builder um rich dude white dude so good because even when when the task was revealed he said have you got a beard trimmer yeah and obviously then alex was like yeah oh he must be so excited and then like no obviously like, no, obviously I don't want that. That's far too much effort. And I'm not shaving my beard off.

Yeah, and you're right. That would have been very upsetting to see Jamali actually make that much effort. No one wants that. He got two points. He deserved one. He absolutely should have got one point for that. It was very bad, but it was very funny. It was really bad, yeah.

Yeah. And I really enjoyed him saying, I don't know what you people do. Yeah. He really is. He got what you people do yeah he got it right he pretty much got it right yeah golf that's what i do um i mean alex has a golf youtube channel so he absolutely nailed it yeah yeah um mike's i mean as soon as they showed mike as the cat warming up to be a cat i was like like, this is so up Mike's street, this whole task. I feel like he could build a whole sitcom out of this. Out of all those characters.

Yeah. He got so into it. He built a wall. He built a wall. And then the spaceman, he was going, I'm going on a journey into the unknown. It's like, it's a photo. You don't need to say anything out loud.

But you just get the impression that he's just enjoying himself. He's finding a way to enjoy himself. He almost forgets that the task is the thing. He's just transformed into a spaceman with pipe arms. I just want to be one of Mike's kids. I bet it's so much fun all of the time. Yeah. I thought it absolutely deserved the five points.

Yeah. It was brilliant. Although Charlotte's Octopus was... Very good. I mean, so I was thinking I think I could have spent all of the time

just making that because how long... They had 20 minutes, was it? Yes, 20 minutes, yeah. Yeah. I was really impressed with her fence. The thing is with Charlotte's

is that I think she was, like the fence was such a good idea. So the fact that she did the octopus was great, but then on the other side was just some of her clothes. So it was a bit pointless using it for that. She could have had something as inventive as the octopus. It would have been great. I mean, she could have just had a head

and it would have been better. Yeah, exactly. Or a fence. Yeah, just a lady behind and it would have been better. Yeah, exactly. Or a fence. Yeah, just a lady behind a fence would have been great. But as Greg described it, boring T-shirt head girl. Which Charlotte very politely pointed out it was just her clothes. So she... What I see is a builder, yeah,

and then I see three pictures of Jamali from a catalogue. No, no, wrong. Completely wrong. Because you've got a builder, then you've got a banker, it's the guy with the stick and the top hat. Then you've got the banker off work playing golf. With the same stick. And then you've got a guy who I don't even know who that last one is.

At the time, you said number two is a rich dude and number three is a white dude. Because he's playing golf? Yeah. I have a very narrow view about what you people do now studio task um would you enjoy the studio thoughts do you think you'd be good at them margaret are you competitive in that environment i am i'm i'm embarrassingly competitive in all environments and i loathe it about myself so that's an ideal taskmaster contestant isn't it um so i mean it tends to be that the people say oh we like the camaraderie of us all being there together like i loved this series as soon as the the studio task involved everybody's sabotaging that's the first time

that's ever happened everyone just ganging up on yeah. So that feels like, yeah, a proper party atmosphere. So it depends on the task. This sort of thing, I would have done what Charlotte did and cried. That's exactly right. Like that thing. I mean, that was just amazing. I absolutely would have overshot and ruined it. I'd need a couple of goes to see how the fish.

Yeah, it's difficult to get your eye in for that sort of thing. So it was, it was shove your, shove your fish onto the target using your mop. You must shove your fish within 10 seconds of Alex laying down your fish furthest from the target. 10 seconds after each round is eliminated. Last shove of shoving wins.

So it's incredible that Charlotte up until this point has nearly got maximum point. She's dropped one point in the whole episode. She's the first one to step up and she absolutely just fucks the fish off the end of it literally throws it away like it's just a kind of ah i'm winning exactly i don't think her brain can handle it and she was just like well i can't i can't be doing this just do that and it's over it was amazing and she said something like i give up or i'm i'm going or something at the end. And I was like, oh, wow, that's a proper, no, you've just been eliminated. You don't get to say, oh, I give up.

No, you're so shit. You don't get to, it's like trying to leave your job once you've been fired. That's not going to work. I always love when the fact that the stage is called the nappet is mentioned me too i mean what a legacy jess nappet's left i feel like they should show that clip every time they mention it i've watched that so many times that might be one of my favorite taskmaster moments ever her taking a dive off the end of that because she's oh god well look because there's this there's the build-up to it of like,

we're not gonna be blindfolded. No one's gonna fall off the stage. And then just are immediately. And there's that silence afterwards where everyone's like, oh God, is she okay? Yeah. And I was already laughing. Shamefully, if I was there,

that silence would have been filled by me squawking. Going, ah, ah. So it was one point for charlotte immediately um uh it was one point one point for lee was it one point for lee as well it was one point for lee yeah because he he yeah i didn't really understand how he did worse than or as badly as i think they did they both went out in the first round i guess but he didn't yeah but he didn't go off the stage no like so i felt like that was a bit harsh what i loved about it though is that i think it was actually james acaster has pointed out to me that jamali is truly happy only when lee messes something up

so when lee doesn't get points or like like in the salt and sugar thing where they all knew that mike and lee had failed but they didn't know yet. And Jamali was like, I couldn't wait to see you. Here, when Lee punts the fish too short, when he just like knocks it and it's behind everyone else's, you've never seen Jamali that happy. I've got to go back and watch it.

Loses it. He's over the moon. It's's great especially as lee has just said i like jamali because jamali says put that down quick i'm gonna come and do it like properly ordering out it's about and lee goes oh i like jamali and then lee fails and jamali's like ah so good because i think that there's they're so the opposite of each other, aren't they? Yeah. That kind of, yeah, Lee's alpha repressed rage and all of that. And just Jamali watching somebody, yeah, when somebody sets themselves up like that and then. Yeah.

It's terrible. It is enjoyable. It's five points for Mike. Mike's very good at the studio tasks. Yes. Four points for Sarah, three points for Jamali, and then one point for both Lee and Charlotte. I really loved, and Mike was really apologetic about winning as well.

At the end, you can see him saying sorry to Sarah. I really enjoy, I mean, in almost every task, Mike says, do you mind if, and he's practically saying, do you mind if I try and attempt the task? You know, as if Alex is going to go, actually, no. And I feel like Mike would just sit there and just wait. He'd be like, okay, I'll just wait. He's like, do you mind if I go and find some things

that would help me achieve what you've just asked me to do? It's very frustrating seeing someone nail it, but also be nice. Oh, awful, yeah. Yeah, exactly. You want the opposite. You want Lee. Yeah, exactly. You want the opposite. You want Lee. Yeah, exactly. You want Lee to do well.

He was a bit of a dick about it. Yeah. So, look, Charlotte tried to throw it away, but she couldn't manage it. She still won the episode with a very impressive 20 points. Oh, I'm so happy for her. Charlotte, 20 points. Then Mike, second, 18 18 points sarah 16 points

jamali 13 and lee bad episode for lee after a good run of form nine points so series series series points wise bearing in mind i think sarah was 20 points ahead at one point yeah was really streaking out in front and it was almost, it was looking not boring. But you know what I mean? Yeah, no, it does. It is a little bit boring. You want a bit more of a,

yeah. Yeah. She's on 143. Mike's now on 137. Lee's on 132. Jamali's on 125. And Charlotte's on 118. So honestly,

even Charlotte, I mean, she's not, she's not going to win. She's not going to. But she's, is it possible for her to Charlotte, I mean, she's not going to win. She's not going to. Is it possible for her to win? I mean, everybody else would have to score north. Maybe if everyone else, you know, yeah, if they lost all the tapes to their tasks or something.

Maybe, and they only had Charlotte's left. That is going to be a shit episode, to be fair. I don't think they'd put it out. Let's see what Charlotte did. She still lose the episode somehow. Yes, I'm mad. One point for everything. to be fair I don't think they'd put it out let's see what Charlotte did she still lose the episode somehow yes I'm mad

one point for everything so yeah 118 points for Charlotte I don't think she's in with a sniff

of winning but the rest of them sort of Sarah is now nowhere nowhere near as far ahead

as she was and Mike is catching up and Lee could do it as well do you have any predictions do you do you think do you think Mike can steal it off Sarah?

It's interesting, isn't it? Because they do, like Mike has such a unique comedy brain and he's so, but yeah, is he consistent? I don't think so. I think Sarah's going to win it. I think she just has those all around skills. Yeah, you're right. I think she's, yeah, it's the consistency that matters here.

And I think Mike could have a terrible episode 10. Yes. Well, if Mike's bowels hold up, then maybe. Can you imagine if the rest of it is just him shitting himself in every task it's possible yeah because we don't know we don't know what tasks came after the the bum thing oh you're right yeah um so yeah i think i think mike could do it if he has a stunning episode 10 but if sarah just keeps her head down and is consistent, then it might, yeah.

It's weird because even the things you expect Lee to be good at, because he's actually weirdly sporty in lots of ways, but I feel like the tension has got to him. I feel like he's choked a bit. His mind's gone. I almost think, now and again, he's not wearing his evil Knievel jacket because it's too warm so it happened today in the yogurt task he's just wearing shorts and a t-shirt because it's clearly too warm for him to wear a big leather jacket and

a helmet um i think that's when he doesn't do as well when he doesn't when he doesn't have his jacket on the uniform yeah he needs the costume Oh my God. Sometimes he's dressed as Evel Knievel and then sometimes he's dressed as a dad on holiday. You're right. Just a shouting dad. Yeah. Thank you very much for coming on the Taskmaster podcast margaret um we always ask our guests to rate their experience on the podcast between one and five points in the style of taskmaster feel free to rate it however you feel you say that ed but i've got your little face in front of me

correct i can only give it five. And listen, you need to go back and get a point off Jo Brand because she thought she was marking herself on Taskmaster. Yes. You asked her. Yeah. So you really are across this, actually. Do you want to host a podcast about this podcast? Yeah, no, that is my intention.

And I will be really slating every episode, like really going to town on you. Josh Whittacombe gave it five points, but this episode didn't deserve it, actually. Very poor stuff. Thank you very much, Margaret. Absolute pleasure. There we go.

What a great episode with Margaret. Thank you so much. She really is a proper Taskmaster fan. She knows her shiz. Remind you again to listen to the Do The Right Thing podcast that she co-hosts. It is truly excellent. And also check her out on Motherland

and you can find that on iPlayer after that. Thank you very much for listening. We're coming to the end of Series 11. Really thank you for listening. I get a lot of correspondence about this podcast and most of it's good. So thank you for listening. I get a lot of correspondence about this podcast. And most of it's good. So thank you very much for that. It's the final episode next week.

Special things planned. I'm sure. Who will win? This is the big question. It's actually not the big question for a lot of people. Really is it? I care about that sort of thing. But as I'm constantly told by other people.

The winner doesn't matter it's been a great series who will win? we all win because Taskmaster's brilliant email us taskmasterpodcast at gmail.com with your predictions

with your questions with anything you damn well please until then keep watching Taskmaster and I will see you next week bye are you ready? yeah

let go Alex let go. I'm toppling in three, two, one! Bullshit! Bullshit! Bullshit! That was so close to the six if it had been to the right. That is soul-destroying. I put so much effort into that.

Were you holding that when I let go? I was holding it until you told me to stop holding it. And then did you in any way grab it? I didn't grab it. That was going like that and something took it to the left. I'm just going to check the numbers. You don't have to check. You can see it's not going anywhere near. Don't do that.

That's very irritating. It's really disappointing. Yeah. We can wait for clean water solutions. Or we can engineer access to clean water. We can acknowledge indigenous cultures. Or we can engineer access to clean water. We can acknowledge Indigenous cultures.

Or we can learn from Indigenous voices. We can demand more from the earth. Or we can demand more from ourselves. At York University, we work together to create positive change for a better tomorrow. Join us at yorku.ca slash write the future.