Taskmaster The Podcast - Ep 5. James Acaster

Episode Date: November 12, 2020

This week Ed is joined by comedian, podcaster and Series 7 contestant, James Acaster. James and Ed discuss the latest episode and even a potential conspiracy theory! The pair also reminisce about the infamous circle task, hula hooping and Gandhi's glasses...plus a full rendition of Pants on a Stick!  Taskmaster is on Channel 4 Thursdays at 9pm and you can catch the family friendly version Sundays on E4 at 6pm. Taskmaster the Podcast is produced by Daisy Knight for Avalon Television LtdGet in touch with Ed and future guests:[e-mail] Visit the Taskmaster Youtube channelwww.youtube.com/taskmaster For all your Taskmaster goodies visit www.taskmasterstore.com  Sales, advertising and general enquiries:[e-mail]   Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

It's hockey season, and you can get anything you need delivered with Uber Eats. Well, almost, almost anything. So, no, you can't get an ice rink on Uber Eats. But iced tea, ice cream, or just plain old ice? Yes, we deliver those. Gold tenders, no. But chicken tenders, yes. Because those are groceries, and we deliver those, too.

Along with your favorite restaurant food, alcohol, and other everyday essentials. Order Uber Eats now. For alcohol, you must be legal drinking age. Please enjoy responsibly. Order Uber Eats now. For alcohol, you must be legal drinking age. Please enjoy responsibly. Product availability varies by region. See app for details. Hello there, it's Ed Gamble and welcome to the Taskmaster podcast. We'll be chatting about episode 5 of series 10 of Taskmaster on channel 4. I've been hosting all of them, I've really enjoyed them so far.

This might be my favourite episode of the series. It's a brilliant one. All of the tasks are very funny. There is a task at the end that made me absolutely scream. I'll just say watermelon. You should know that already, though, because if you're listening to this podcast, you should have seen the episode already. Go away, go on to all four, watch the episode of Taskmaster before you listen to this episode of the Taskmaster podcast. There will be spoilers. There will be chat about what went on during the episode. It's so funny. I mean, obviously, if you're not, you get on watching Taskmaster when it goes out. You want to be there while it's happening. Nine o'clock Thursdays on Channel 4. But if you don't like swears or bums,

I always say bums. There's not been a bum in it yet, really. Richard Herring's actually quite early on. We saw some of his bum. But no full bums. But if you don't want to see a full bum and you're worried that there might be one and you've got kids watching or you don't like swearing, watch it on E4 on Sundays at 6pm. That's the family-friendly version.

So I just kind of want to crack into this. I want to get talking about the episodes. There was some points controversies, some absolutely brilliant tasks, some underwhelming prize tasks, as per usual. And our special guest this week to talk us through all of that

is the wonderful James Acaster. James is no stranger to the world of podcasts. We do one together called Off Menu. He loves Taskmaster. He was on Series seven uh he's an extremely popular contestant uh and he still watches the show to this day so he's very across this series and has some hot takes and searing opinions so let's dive headlong into those don't forget taskmaster 9 p.m channel 4 or e4 6 p.m on sundays uh watch it check out the youtube channel youtube.com forward

slash taskmaster for extra content uh do all of that we'll see you after this enjoy hello james acaster welcome oh no no it's not that one welcome james acaster no it's not that one we're doing a different a different podcast this time this is the taskmaster podcast uh where you are a special guest james he finally gets to relax and just enjoy the experience oh thank you of talking about taskmaster series 10 episode 5 oh thank you ed what a nice surprise Just kick back, relax You're not working today What about you, are you working? I'm working my B off

Wait till you see me at work at this one Off menu, very chill experience For me to be honest, it's just a sort of Little chat about food, I do that all day, every day Anyway, this, I do notes I do prep Oh dear, deary me Are you impressed?

I am quite impressed. A different side to you I've never seen before. This little swat. Oh, with a little shiny apple for the teacher. Yes, I would bring teacher a little shiny apple. Who's your teacher in this scenario? I guess Greg or Alex. Actually, I'm going to say Alex is the teacher in this scenario.

Really? Yeah. Because he's the one who gets told off on the show a lot um but now what the podcast is like below him in terms of in terms of sort of uh authority so he very much takes out his authority on us yes so who's greg then is he the headmaster is he offstead god oh yeah yeah oh dear uh so you're here because of course you were on taskmaster series seven weren't you james uh and you're here to lend your your the best series according to you uh most people say it is yeah i know but those are the people who message

you about it aren't they i'm i i know i don't get messaged it is it is a very good series but they are all they are all equal uh apart from nine which is the best uh you are here to chat about series 10 though which is an excellent series and episode five potentially my favorite episode so far but we will get into that do you have fond memories of your experience on taskmaster yes i have fond memories i have ups and downs in my mind from it um you know it was tricky being part of a team a cast where you know if any of us had been on any of the other episodes any of the other series i mean we probably would have won so it was difficult being part of a lineup where all of you would have won on any other

series but now you're having to compete against each other and i think that was the trickiest thing that is an interesting um an interesting take on your series especially given i think in the first episode you suggested that you were the stupidest lineup yet that was an early remark that um was proven to be wrong very quickly after that like the more it progressed the more it was clear that we were all champion of champions it was kind of like a champion of champions series without having to do the other series before that you know so take us through your your lineup then and then tell me why each of them would have been a champion on another series yes uh uh kerry godleman she would have been a champion on any other series she was a champion on our series

to be fair well i agree with that she was the champion of your series very very good there was the catchphrase bish bash bosh that greg gave her because she was doing things real straightforward um jessica nappet yeah i think only lost by one point you see um just really creative of all of her tasks i agree uh threw herself into everything threw herself off the stage at one point onto the floor and uh i didn't see it i was blindfolded at the time. Yeah. But I heard it. I mean, we're paddling around, aren't we? Because I agree with those two. I thought they were both very good.

I think they would have done very well on any other series. Yes, so far. Maybe we should dive headlong into the pool of faeces that was the remaining three people. Well, I don't think the other three were a pool of faeces. No, Rod was quite good. Rod was quite good. Yes, and let's start with him.

Rod Gilbert. Fantastic. You know, really utilised his friendship with Greg a lot of the time to give him a bit of leverage. That was smart. And also, really made use of Alex

all the time. Yeah, very clever. Would use spray water up his bum at one point and stuff like that very good and like really you know uh he would really think about his tasks long and hard any other series no one else would have thought that much about their tasks i see he would have defeated the people um so now it's you and you and phil left placed bottom i think i guess your second from last ph Phil was last. Yes, Phil Wang was last. But again, in any other series, he would have won.

And I was second from last. Explain that. Well, Phil had a very nice outfit that everyone still talks about to this day that he wore for all of the tasks. And he was on Greg's bad side. I don't know what he did. Maybe down the walk to the studio or something like that to upset Greg. Said something out of turn.

But he was getting penalised left, right and centre for stuff he didn't deserve. Because of his outfit, we were getting penis eyes. Oh, I see what you mean. Yes, yes. But he had a catchphrase. He kept on saying that he haggled for stuff. That's got to be worth some points. And just very good at thinking, you know,

the way that Phil would think about tasks was he would just kind of try and think of a different task and kind of do that. And that was quite clever. So I love Phil to bits, but he was quite bad at a lot of the tasks. So immediately he wouldn't have won any other series. He interpreted them differently. Yeah, wrongly. James, would wouldn't have won any other series he interpreted them differently yeah wrongly james how would you have won any other series tell me through being great i i on so many of my tasks i did really well and it was just unlucky

that there was a bunch of other people in the same series as me who were also amazing and we were all like so good but like i was always i'd always think again like i had a different way of thinking about it and i'd really throw myself into it i used my knowledge of the show i watched so many episodes of the show i really knew my way around the house yeah well well yeah you won on your series which was let's face it dutch central yours one was a bunch of people who would have lost. You had the opposite line-up to me. That's not true.

We had some excellent competitors. You would all be last place in any other series. David Baddiel, yes. I believe he is bottom of the average points across all 10 series. If you were on our series edge, you would have got bullied and Phil would have beat you.

I hate to tell you. I hate to be the one to have beat you i mean i hate to tell you i hate to be i'm just i'm just gonna let you i'm just gonna let you say that because we've got a lot of stuff to talk about so i'm just gonna have to let you get away with it now james so i won the first task you you won the first task well done this was a task and you got five points thank you um on your series of you say it was up and down for your series of taskmaster uh what was the high point and what was the crushing low? Well, the high point, and I mean, you wouldn't know it because it was in one of the episodes around the middle, I think,

but for me, it was on my first day of filming. One of my early tasks, but we had to do a portrait of the Taskmaster, which I think is always fun. Every episode, they kind of do a portrait of the Taskmaster, but our think is always fun every episode they kind of do Portrait of the Taskmaster but our one they kind of tricked us a little bit because they had an earlier task where we had to put 50 things in a bin as quick as possible and

then later on those 50 things were given back to us we had to make the portrait out of those things and I had just put in 49 stones that I found in the driveway and a ukulele and so obviously I was very when I went in the room and they were laying on the floor and they said do a portrait of Greg I thought well this is going to be awful yeah and uh then I thought midway through I realized I could possibly

uh snap the you know break the ukulele up and use it in separate parts. And very luckily, every time I broke it off, it just looked like it was very apparent what part of his face it was. Every time I'd break it off, it'd clearly be the arch of his eyebrow. And even, like, you couldn't see it in the episode, but, like, I'd used some of the strings as his hair. And Greg's hair really does look like it's made of ukulele strings, like it looks exactly the same and I was so so happy with it and I remember

Alex telling me that one of the team Taskmaster team had walked past it and looked at it and went that's like actual art and it was day one and I thought I'm going to win this I'll tell you why i remember it it's

because i think everyone who's been on taskmaster has this where you have somewhere you do really well and and you're really excited to get to those tasks because you know you did well on it and if you don't win those tasks it really feels like a bigger defeat than you're than you're ready for it's absolutely horrendous yeah and i was like i better win this one because otherwise i don't know it's gonna be humiliating i i had that a couple of times but also it's worth it for the other way around when you beat the person who thought they were going to win yes because to see that look on someone else's face that they didn't win in one where they thought they'd nailed it and you're the person who did it to them oh that is sweet yes i mean again though with my series there was one and poor phil uh yeah he

had one that he was like i know i've done well on this and uh i don't think he even came second in it and i i thought i said to him listen man on any other series you'd have won that task even now you say the word taskmaster around phil he suddenly looks like someone's taking the air out of him the show really did beat him to a pulp uh so what was your what was your lowest moment james well i mean there's a few to choose from i guess probably my lowest moment would have probably would have to be the hulaing um you know because it was so close to it was so close to being my highest moment you know i'd we had been told to me and phil and we didn't know that anyone else no one else had been given this task but we've been told to learn how

to hula in time for the studio and to improve on our hula in attempts were done in the house and i'd got like three seconds in the house i took my hula hoop home and i thought no you know you probably got to try and do this because otherwise you're just going to get in the studio and you'll do another three seconds and that'll be bad television so really learn how to do this james and i really was committed to it i practiced it at home i was on tour at the time and i would be hulaing as the audience were walking in and then they would wonder why I got a lot of tweets after those shows being like um yeah okay fair enough show but can I ask why you were hulaing when we walked in such a lovely a lovely compliment from the audience as well that you had a fair enough show fair enough show little question

why were you hulaing when we walked in because we thought that was going to be a setup for what the show was about and then you didn't mention it and i was like can't tell you what i'm hulaing but i was learning a hula and i was dedicated to it and i could i you know my pre-show walk-in was anything from 30 to 45 minutes and by the end of that little tour i was doing the whole thing i was hulaing for the full 45, I could do it for 45 minutes. And then it came to the studio and it was me and Phil. And Phil had already told me before we did it, he said, I haven't practiced this at all. And I was like, right, well, Phil hasn't done it at all. And they blew the whistle and we both panicked.

And it just immediately felt, I don't think i even did three seconds just fell to the ground and then i wanted to prove that i could do it and i did it for ages and i think the full video of it is on youtube somewhere and um i only stopped because they told me to stop and then i still didn't get the points because they had to take my first attempt because you did it so quickly the first time it was almost it, you may as well have just put on a big pair of trousers and let them drop. You didn't do, you didn't hula it at all. Didn't hula it at all.

I just went straight to the floor because I was in my head. I was just like, oh no, I really panicked. It was a real low moment. It was a low moment, but great telly, I thought. Yes, well, to be fair, you know, I can look at it now and be like, that's the best outcome as a viewer. And just to finish off the story, do you want to tell everyone where that hula hoop is now? I'm looking at it right now. It's in my living room. I can see it.

And I hula every day in lockdown because it's one of the few things I can do for exercise in my own home. So I hula all the time still thanks to Taskmaster now from uh the round hula hoop to the pointiest thing that's this week's prize task is the pointiest thing uh i remember you being pretty good at prize tasks i think i think you had some decent decent prize tasks yeah and let me say right first of all i love this cast i love this series they suck at the prize tasks it has not gone unnoticed by anyone they are i mean the fact they're all consistently bad i think is hilarious that's that's what's funny about it but they are the worst cast ever for prize tasks i think it's like and i know richard herring has seen every episode

of taskmaster and i'm pretty sure the others have at least seen one episode it's like they've never seen the show and they don't know what the prize task is supposed to be. They don't even try and they don't even try and defend it. When it gets pointed out that it's rubbish, all of them sit there and go, yeah, pretty much. What the hell? Come on, guys. Because you really need to think of something inventive.

I spent ages thinking of mine. You had, I believe, a cutout mc hammer was your first one i think which was my first one great way to start things you'd like to touch mc hammer yeah great very very very good uh one that really sticks in the memory of yours uh was uh gandhi's glasses yeah where you claim to have got muhammad gandhi's actual Yes. That was for best thing beginning with G. Well, yeah, I think Gandhi's glasses was great. And, I mean, all joking aside about you winning any other series, I think

you would have won every prize task on this series so far. Yep, with Gandhi's glasses. I could have brought Gandhi's glasses in to every single one of them, and I think I would have actually committed to the argument every time. They don't even try an argument. Apart from, there was one person on this prize task who was very unlucky who i think did think outside the box and i think is getting unfairly penalized throughout the series is it moan yes i think moan is occasionally

unfairly penalized um but i enjoy it because moan's face when he is all excited about something uh that he's done something clever and then greg says i don't like it his disappointed face I enjoy it because Mouan's face when he is all excited about something, that he's done something clever. And then Greg says, I don't like it. His disappointed face is my favourite thing. It's a funny face, very expressive. But I think bringing in a book that makes a lot, that has, it's called something about getting your point across.

Yeah. So it's about points, a book that's about getting points across, it's a different version of points, I think that's good and I can't believe he came last! Yeah I think that was very unfair, it was, I feel like he should have come closer towards the top but I feel like

occasionally he doesn't throw himself into his own arguments enough like you said so he had that pointy thing he went, it's really clever I've thought about about this it's really good and then in the same sentence with no one else saying anything he went i don't really know what it means yeah and i don't know about this anymore and he just started to look crestfallen within his own monologue which doesn't help you need to look confident and then you can bring greg along with Yeah, you need to argue your prize tasks against Greg Davis and that's what I did and

you know, I don't know how many prize tasks I won but I always came out with them with my dignity intact. Yeah. It seems they're just an old pair of glasses and a lot of bullshit. Daisy I don't think can bring in a good prize

task because it will ruin the joke. Sure, yeah. Hers are so bad. This was a kebab skew or something this week. Awful. I don't think Richard should have won. I think that was a classic three-pointer.

I think Richard should have been straight down the middle, three points. He didn't even know the name of Pinhead. He just said he brought a mask of the guy from Hellraiser and that he wears it

in bed with his wife. He absolutely should not have won that. And I know he listens to this. So Richard, you shouldn't have won that. There's a point where Greg did a quote from Hellraiser and Richard didn't have a clue what he was talking about. Catherine, four points for the Venetian mask. We've not even mentioned the Venetian mask.

That's again, there's only one point on that. It doesn't seem pointy. And I just don't, again, I can't see how that's coming in second when Moran brought that book in. I mean, that's such a good book. And also, I'm bored of the masks, man. It's not best mask.

Why are the masks at the top? I think Greg was just like, oh, I like that mask, and now I'm going to group the masks together the top? True. I think Greg was just like, oh, I like that mask. And now I'm going to group the masks together. He's lazy. Johnny's meat thermometer, three points. That seems fair. It's, you know, not terrible.

Not great. Yeah. Yeah. Fair enough. To be side by side with the skewer. Yeah. The skewer. I mean, that should have been bottom, I think.

Yes. And Daisy would not have had been bottom, I think. Yes. And Daisy would not have had any recourse to argument about that. And Moan was bottom. And it just depends what mood you get Greg in. Sometimes he likes clever, and sometimes he thinks clever should be penalised. I'm fine with the scoring of the rest of them in that order. Yeah.

But just move Moan up to the top place. So let's crack up with the first task proper. don't you want to know what I would have brought in oh of course I do I'm so sorry James James what would you have brought in for pointiest thing five points right now how would you have represented that

well I can't have the five points unless he gives me the five points so i would say mine is five points and then i'll play greg and i'll play greg in this scenario yes right so you've brought in five points have you i have greg the pointiest thing especially in a round as this we're all playing for points and the pointiest it gets in the prize task is five points. So I've brought in five points, which is the pointiest

thing within this round. But you've not brought them in, though, because you don't have them yet. But that's because you're going to give them to me because I'm going to win. But I wouldn't give them to you because then I'm not going to give you points for not bringing something in for the

prize task. You've not brought anything in for the prize task. So you get not points. You're disqualified. No, I've got the five points. You don't have the task. I've you're asking me to give them to you.

You've turned up with nothing and then asked me to give you something. So you get nothing for not partaking in the prize task this week. Well, that's not, no, because i bought five points i just explained it uh no but you've not if you well if you've brought five points in then i don't need to give you any points because you've already got five points therefore my never task what task uh the the holes one right i think that's that dealt with isn't it let's move on to task one which has bagged the heaviest thing from the furthest distance

through one of those Christmas tree machines. Now, I mean, I think it's a lot of people's fantasies to go through one of those, isn't it? Yeah, I mean, every now and again, the difficult thing about watching Taskmaster after you've been on it is you just go, oh, I wish they'd done that on my series. I would have loved it.

Yeah, 100%. And definitely a Christmas tree, anything involving that Christmas tree bagging machine, i would have loved it yeah definitely a christmas tree anything involving that christmas tree bagging machine yeah i would have loved i almost to the extent that of course you want to put yourself through it i almost did don't trust anyone who didn't do that on this task the fact that uh richard and moan and uh i think da Daisy didn't put themselves through it I think they are they robots why aren't they why isn't that your first thing you do and absolutely do that yeah would you have done that no I know what I would have done oh interesting well yeah let's tackle this now what would you have done well correct me if I'm wrong, but the points you get is from distance away from the machine multiplied by the weight of what you're putting in.

I'd have fired a cannon into it. Right. So I would have gone far back with the cannon, aimed it really well, fired the cannonball, and it would have gone through. Cannonballs are really heavy. You can get really far and really accurate. And then that would have gone through cannonballs are really heavy you can get really far and really accurate and then that would have easily won it now when you say well there's a few things to chat about on there so you would have got a cannon how would you have got a cannon i've made some phone calls when i was on it i got richard osmond for one of the tasks

yeah but richard osmond is a man who exists he's not a canon canons exist you don't have a canon's phone number i can find a canon's phone number i mean richard osmond is a man who can like you know say no and run away a canon is an object that you can just make do whatever you like yeah but the person who has the canon can say no can't they the production crew can say no we're not buying you an ancient military weapon to fire a cannon through i don't know if they'd say no to it you know i think they would see the opportunity for good television there and also i don't think you can aim a cannon you can aim a cannon they're not classically uh like pinpoint accurate weapons i don't think i think so that's what they're for right they're not missing all the time, are they?

Yeah, but they're hitting... You're aiming them at ships or you're aiming them at an army. It doesn't really matter if they don't hit a particular square metre. They're causing damage. What you would have done is you would have tried to fire a cannon

from outside the gates. It wouldn't have gone very far and the cannonball would have rolled down the little slope. And you would have really hurt yourself i'd imagine it's possible i would have hurt myself i mean i think there's yeah that that's probably inevitable and i've already written that off that i'm gonna hurt myself doing that but um i mean there is a chance i've missed the christmas tree bagging machine and hit the house just a small chance yeah but also you know if that happens what you know that's an exciting turn of events for the show right no they don't like that um on uh my series i had to do a thing uh

with the last task of the whole series actually where i had to knock over some bowling pins with a bowling ball and i kept rolling it so hard that it was slamming into the side of the house and like basically knocked a brick out from the foundations and they don't they don't like it because they've got to do other stuff with the house they've got other series planned yeah yeah that's fair enough so you would have done the canon sure no one else no one else went with the canon i don't think it was ever properly decided the distance traveled thing whether it needed to be one movement or not because that's and that came in quite late

in the conversation in the studio but because my first thought was just go as far away as you can and sprint top speed and then dive through it uh-huh that's what i would have done i would have gone across the road i would have run straight towards it and jumped in. But they seem to be saying towards the end that the distance travelled was like one movement, which is why Catherine did fine because she was in a wheelbarrow,

but Johnny got penalised. I'm not sure about Catherine's one. Are you not? Why? They showed Alex wheeling her all the way down the hill. Yeah. All the way up to the thing.

And then she starts to look nervous and goes, oh, I'm not sure and like that and then it cuts to a different shot where her position in the wheelbarrow is completely different yeah so she's gone from being on her back with her legs forward to being on her front with her head forward and alex just turned herself around how how is she doing that without her legs touching the floor so you're not you think there was some you've got a conspiracy theory about katherine's so you don't think if i'm filming

that and katherine parkinson has got to get herself from lying on her back in a wheelbarrow up on all fours that's funny i think everything katherine does is funny. Yes. She's just got, her whole personality is just so timid, but also so repressed. When I watched the show with my girlfriend, my girlfriend's now got a catchphrase

because Catherine is just like a nice posh mum with everything she does. Every time she does anything, my girlfriend will go, oh, mummy. She is quite similar to your girlfriend's mother that was a brilliant oh mommy moment yes where she was just so timidly she came down so slowly in that wheelbarrow and then just edged her way through the christmas tree machine go oh try yeah okay

she almost said excuse me to the christmas tree machine they started laughing and once she'd gone through the other end yeah it was funny had a complete realization of what she was doing and where her life was and couldn't stop laughing about it whereas everyone else is a little bit more aggressive richard like every task he's done so far it's just he gets it done but he's also a mess while he does it so i mean i i now see him as a like a hermes delivery driver who's had a breakdown, just the way he sort of chucks things in. He was chucking that in. His hair was everywhere.

It was like he's divorced and trying to prove himself to his estranged children. Yeah, I'm not sure. I thought Richard was going to be a lot more wily. I thought he was going to be the one trying to find loopholes and stuff like that. I think he thinks he's wily, right? Do you think he a lot more wily. I thought he was going to be the one trying to find loopholes and stuff like that. I think he thinks he's wily, right? Do you think he thinks he's wily? I think he

thinks he's wily, but he looks hungover. The whole time he looks hungover. He might be. He looks more like Johnny Vegas doing the task than Johnny Vegas does. Yeah, good point. Honestly, Johnny Vegas is taking it a lot more seriously. He's really got himself johnny vegas doing the task than johnny vegas does yeah good point actually johnny vegas is

his uh taking it a lot more seriously seems like he's really got himself together yeah uh yeah heron's a mess like vegas is obviously you know chaotic but it seems a lot more controlled and measured now and he laughs a lot more than he used to when he's in his persona so now he's sort of desperate but he'll do a cheeky little smile afterwards whereas richard is just chucking everything he has but he doesn't have much he's got that that front bit of hair he's got going absolutely mad in front that's it is it it's the front bit of hair flopping around everywhere as he huffs and puffs to try and get a horn case full of rocks through a christmas tree machine Yeah. And Johnny was quite unlucky in this task, I thought,

for only getting one point for putting... He went and got a man from the street. That was pretty impressive. Yeah, it's not easy to convince someone who's on their way to work, of all things, to hold themselves up and put themselves through a Christmas tree wrapping machine. Please, please, please come here. Would you do me a massive favour?

I've got to win a task. Would you let me wrap you like like a christmas tree please i've got to be at work for 12 no you'll be there by 12 it'll take one minute so at the end of the first uh task uh katherine uh won by putting herself through uh 47 million uh that's the five points for katherine love that muwan for a second thought that you got that he was going to get 2.63 million points. But very lucky that that's not how it worked because he would be so far behind if that was the case. And Catherine

would have had an unassailable lead because she got 47 million points. Richard came second with his horn case full of pebbles. Mouan came third with the horn case full of pebbles Mawaan came third with the rice rocket actually do you know what I'm contesting Catherine again

so one is that I think she got out the wheelbarrow and plopped herself in but also she lied about her weight and they went along with it I was going to come to this I can't believe Greg went along with that it must have nearly been dinner or something and he wanted to get on with it because you can't believe Greg went along with that. I think it must have nearly been dinner or something and he wanted to get on with it

because you can't say, yeah, Catherine, fine, we believe you, you're 22 stone. Was it an awkward situation of going, they didn't want to weigh Catherine on the day? Was it because Alex was too embarrassed to ask a lady to weigh herself? Maybe, but then in that case, if I'm Greg, again, that's where the bug stops, right?

If I'm Greg and I'm going, well, you're clearly not 22 stone, so I'm just going to halve that. If you don't tell us your real weight, I'm just going to halve it and say you're 11 stone. And there's no rhyme or reason to it. It's just because I know you're not 22 stone.

Do something like that, Greg. Don't go, oh yeah, I'll believe that you're 22 stone and then you win the task. But then sometimes you just, I you just let people have it 47 million points is really funny and also imagining that she's 22 stone yeah well as long as that comes up more often throughout the series that they talk about her being 22 stone fair enough but i do agree i think some people are going to be very angry about that, that she was allowed. I think I know why he was so nice to her this episode, actually.

Go on. Because I watched one of the outtakes from the previous episode where she does a fart. Yes, that was an outtake that came out last week where, yeah, she does a little fart when she saw the chickens. Saw the chickens and she does a fart. And I think Greg felt bad about showing the footage of her doing the fart and so it was very generous to her on the first task this this week well no wonder she did a fart if she's carrying

around 22 stone and such a small body yeah it must just be all the all the muscle and fat must just be pressing down on her bowels yeah i imagine so so task uh task two of this episode uh it's the old classic paint a picture of a wolf on a rotating teapot and name 20 us states to slow the wheel down this would have panicked me a huge amount because it was because it was an art task i'm not confident of my art skills for good reason so i would have i would have really panicked when that was that was announced uh and then also the having to name 20 year states under pressure uh would have really thrown me i think you could have done this you've done a lot of traveling around america i think you would have done the States okay.

But yeah, I could do the States like now, probably, but not while painting on a teapot while someone's filming me and knowing that the quicker I did them, the more it would help. I think that's what screws people. Catherine didn't attempt any. She was just like, no, I'm not doing it. Just went straight for the painting, which is, you know, fair enough, but you hate to see it. You hate to see it.

You've got to do it. You like to see one person do it. That's the thing about Taskmaster. You want to see the different approaches. And the fact it was Catherine and the fact by the end it was just spinning around so fast and her painting was a complete mess. I liked her not getting any of Alex's clues. Every time he said to her, this is a new jersey, she was like, yeah, it's very nice, Alex.

Yeah, nice, yeah. Mouan, having an absolute nightmare. He picked exclusively cities for most of the American states and couldn't believe it when he was told they weren't states. Yeah, Philadelphia. LA. Yeah. That's one.

LA, that's one. So confident. And then stopping Alex helping him as well. So Alex... Yeah. so confident and then stopping stopping alex helping him as well so alex yeah telling it telling alex to stop talking because he was trying to put him off which is great but he eventually found the clues though yeah he did that was my one thing that i really wish like because i after having watched so much of the show and then being on it i so so wanted to discover a clue like when there's that series where they've got to uh make a bridge with the stuff that's on the table yeah and then all

the clues are there to help them get all the equipment that's underneath the table and you go oh i would have loved to have been like the person who just figures that out and actually does so hard though because then when you get that in your head you're looking for clues in every task you do yeah um so points uh at the end of that uh we had richard winning another five points because your name's the 20 states because he's a big oxford show-off and uh did i mean none of the paintings were good let's be honest. Mine would have been good. Yeah, I know yours... I'm taking that across the board, James,

that you think you would have won every task on this episode. Yeah! Daisy named 18 states and got five points as well. And then we have three points for Johnny, two points for Moanne, and one point for Catherine. She named zero states and one point for Catherine. She named zero states and did a terrible painting.

The next task, a little homework task, do something out of character with £20. Straight away, James Acaster, what are you're doing well oh it's quite difficult there's a there's a lot of things that um because i thought some of their ones are really good and uh greg wasn't convinced so i think you'd i mean you'd have to go really out of your comfort zone and do something you'd i've never done drugs like katherine suggested drugs poopers i've never ever done drugs so that would be unarguably out of character but then i would have done drugs i don't really want to do that in a minute i think it'd be pretty scary uh i mean i don't want to donate to like trump's campaign or something yeah that's true

you would have got in trouble i reckon reckon, if you'd done that. But out of character, for sure. Very out of character, I like to think. You know, I could go the... If we're looking at our friendship, Ed, and our professional relationship, I could have spent it all on cheese and biscuits. Yeah, that's true.

And eaten a lot of cheese and biscuits, like cheese boards. I hate cheese boards. I could have eaten those. that would have had less impact than taking drugs or donating to trump's campaign now because you want to go big with these ones right because then you can just go well you're just eating some food i'm sure you've eaten that before oh no so yeah i think i'd have to do something that i would regret the thing is josh Whittacombe's spoiled a lot of things by getting that tattoo in series one because the biggest impact would be a tattoo and that would be out of character for you.

It would actually. And do you know what? I would get a tattoo of Josh getting his tattoo of Greg on his foot. So I'd have a tattoo, maybe on my back, a full back tat of Josh Whittacombe. Yep, of Josh Whittacombe having his foot tattooed with Greg on it.

And let me tell you, if you want a full back piece for £20, that is not going to be recognisable as what you want it to be. That is going to be an absolute mess. Yeah, it'll look awful. You could have got a piercing, I suppose. You could have got an eyebrow piercing. Sure. I don't, I haven't got any piercings, so I could have got,

I mean, where would I get one that would mean the least i mean a nipple piercing i think would be funny that would be really funny yeah nipple piercing and you could get that for 20 quid i'm sure sure yeah that would be great if i'd whipped that out and be like there you go greg how's that um okay so let's let's crack on and uh and speak about what they did. Because like you say, I think everyone did pretty well on this. There were no one-pointers, which I think speaks to that. Daisy got a subscription to portable restroom operators, which is out of character for most people apart from portable restroom operators, right?

Yes, I mean, yes, it is out of character i suppose i mean getting a subscription to a magazine yeah i'm sure she's had done that before uh okay so you're you're suggesting that the act itself is the magazine subscription rather than the subject matter of the magazine like daisy talks about a lot of grot on the show. She's got a potty mouth. Which we're going to hear more from later. Yeah. So therefore, you know, if someone said,

guess what Daisy May Cooper's got a magazine subscription to, and it was, you know, shit. I would still be surprised. Just because someone swears a lot i'm not assuming they read magazines about feces don't think it's that out of character is all i'm saying johnny had i mean this is probably my favorite johnny had his uh yeah his chest waxed uh with a tm shape and also his armpits on top for no reason i mean that is yes out of character and shows a true commitment

to the show i can't remember if he won this task or not he definitely deserved to daisy one daisy daisy and mawan came joint first uh and johnny got four points which must be a kick in the knackers when you have your chest waxed that level of pain i he's not the first person to have their chest waxed for Taskmaster, I gave away my chest to be waxed as the smoothest thing for a prize task and the winner of the show got to wax my chest and that was the only time David Bedil won an episode

and so David waxed my chest at the end, luckily I don't have a lot of hair there so it wasn't as impressive as what Johnny did, I feel like Johnny should have won, but then also I really again, this is when Mawaan was rewarded have a lot of hair there so it wasn't as impressive as as what johnny did um i feel like johnny should have won but then also i really again this is when my one was rewarded for thinking outside of the box yeah and for quite a similar thinking outside the box to the fact greg is inconsistent this series i'm not i'm after him or maybe he felt bad about the prize task and was trying to redress the balance in this one.

I really enjoyed the words. And it was quite poignant as well that he thinks something out of character for him is being assertive in a work situation. Yeah, which was good. I thought that was really well done and a good thing to spend the money on because, you know, in the studio,

you want to have something to show for it. Okay, well I'd like to say no, Greg. I am a valuable member of this team. I'm assertive, I'm creative, I'm powerful, I'm beautiful, I'm a sexy badass bitch. I added that last bit.

Richard got four points for the tarot card reading. How do we feel about that? Do you think yeah pretty good? I think that's fair enough I think that if he's never done anything like that ever in his life Then spending the £20 on having a tarot card reading Is fair enough I would say though

Actually no here's where I drill down into it Yeah Have the tarot card reading fine that's out of character but i think in order to be true that you've got to be out of character while you're doing it as well right and go for it yeah he was being very superior about the whole thing right yes that's not out of character is it no it's not but here's where i think richard should not have got four points for that and it's not necessarily his fault sometimes with richard throughout his career quite often what he chooses to do for his shows and his comedy is deliberately do out of character stuff for humor yes so he grew a hitler

moustache for a show. Very out of character, but he did it to investigate doing something out of character. I think doing a tarot card reading or following astrology is exactly the sort of thing Richard Herring would do for laughs. Yes, that is a good point.

So he's kind of checkmated himself with his life and how he lives his life anyway. Because everything, in fact, the most out of character thing that Richard Herring could do would be to do something completely within character. Yeah. So bad luck, Richard.

I'm taking all those points away. I think you're absolutely right there. And I would say as well that from the other angle, him laughing in the tarot card reader's face at the end is too much in character. It's hockey season, and you can get anything you need delivered with Uber Eats. Well, almost, almost anything. So no, you can't get an ice rink on Uber Eats.

But iced tea, ice cream, or just plain old ice? Yes, we deliver those. Goal tenders, no. But chicken tenders, yes. Because those are groceries, and we deliver those too. Along with your favorite restaurant food, alcohol, and other everyday essentials. Order Uber Eats now. For alcohol, you must be legal drinking age.

Please enjoy responsibly. Product availability varies by region. See app for details. We can wait for clean water solutions. Or we can engineer access to clean water. We can acknowledge indigenous cultures. Or we can learn from indigenous voices. We can demand more from the earth.

Or we can demand more from ourselves. At York University, we work together to create positive change for a better tomorrow. Join us at yorku.ca slash write the future. And now it's time for our regular feature, a little fact from your new BFF, Alex Horne. Yo! It's little Alex Horne here, your new BFF bonus fact finder. And today I'm your new BFF bonus fact finder, because I'm going to tell you a little thing about each of the contestants and the out-of-character £20 task,

where the contestants have to do something out of character using £20. contestants and the out-of-character £20 task, where the contestants had to do something out of character using £20. You may have seen Johnny Vegas whispering in my ear his initial plan, but you didn't find out what that plan was. Well, now you're going to find out. So well done for listening to the podcast. We did see Daisy say that normal Daisy would vape and ghost hunt with £20. Richard said that normal Richard would spend £20 on gambling and sweets. That's your little bonus fact about Richard. Catherine said, of course, drugs and poopers.

Her daughter, according to Catherine, would have said that Catherine would never give the money to charity, so that was an option and not a good reflection on the mother. Mawaan said that normal Mawaan would spend the £20 in Poundland on 20 things, whereas out of character Moan, his initial instinct would be to rip it up. He would never normally rip it up

because he's stingy. That's what Moan said about Moan. Whereas Johnny, here we go, his initial instinct out of character behaviour for Johnny Vegas and a £20 note would be, I'm going to join a polo club. That's what he whispered in my ear. Quite aggressively, he was going to go to Richmond Polo Club with £20 and persuade them to let him join as a member. Thanks for listening. Goodbye. See you next week.

Oh. So, we move onwards to, I think, the most visceral task that there's ever been on taskmaster which is eat the most watermelon but a team task obviously watermelons have a long history within the world of taskmaster you think of romesh ranganathan violently smashing a watermelon onto the floor and gobbling it down until he was sick the moment that everyone realised this is a great show yes I believe that is

that's a widely held opinion that that is the moment that Taskmaster really kicked off and I mean it was episode 1 wasn't it I think it was episode 1 but that moment as soon as it hits the floor everyone went this is a good show yeah here we go exciting moment in television and i like that here we are it's series 10 you know it's a big achievement for any tv show series 10 and they've doing a little tip of the cap yeah to where it all started good on them but

but not repeating it exactly. No. Which is key, I think, because I don't think they'll ever start doing that where they start resurrecting old tasks necessarily. This is a team task this time. They have to feed each other. And unfortunately, Daisy and Richard shot their version of the task

before social distancing. Because there's some things that have been brilliant about COVID, and I never thought I'd say this, but what is great about this pandemic is that people now can't feed each other watermelon close up. Yeah, unless they're from the same household. Unless they're from the same household. Just awful.

And the way they edited it, it's going to live with me for the rest of my life. And poor Daisy, when they said we've got to feed each other, the first team task they did when Richard walked into the room daisy backed away from him because she was so scared of him right and then then to be told on the same day because they filmed all the team tasks on the same day yeah to be told you've got to feed each other watermelon she looked horrified she was smiling but her eyes were saying get me out of here right now oh yeah she got she went hysterical at one

point just started laughing uncontrollably because it was just like what is my life what is going on why isn't this man eating any watermelon yeah he was i mean she said herself that he was just staring at her for large portions of it eating the watermelon i mean it was it was a particularly gobsmacking psych she just went for, as you should do in Taskmaster. But she was chowing down on that thing. It was so funny. I mean, I laughed so much. I couldn't stop laughing at it.

I'll definitely re-watch it. It was amazing. Like, slow motion, just right. At one point, she's eating a bit of watermelon, and it snaps. The skin bit snaps snaps and it all falls on the floor and there's a moment where richard gets a handful of watermelon and holds it up in front of her and she looks at it for like a split second and then dives her face into it straight away i do just like yeah i'm just gonna keep doing this rather astute for richard that it that it was like The Walking Dead. And once he'd said that, you can't get that out of your head,

that it's the sort of thing in The Walking Dead they'd walk into a room and see, like in a school gym or something, and see two zombies absolutely feasting on a head. Yeah, exactly like that. Because the crack of a watermelon, very similar. I think they use watermelons as sound effects for, like, skulls being smashed in, in like TV and radio stuff.

So that's all it felt like. Yeah. It was very, very graphic, very visceral. And I also think Daisy and Richard, and we'll come to the others shortly because they did an amazing job too. Yeah. Daisy and Richard eating watermelon

out of each other's hands. And at one point Richard says, don't spit onto the bit I've got to eat. Yeah. I think it will be held up as an example as to what society was like before the pandemic. Like, of course we got a pandemic and we all caught a disease off each other.

Look at what we were doing. Careful not to spit on my bit of watermelon that I've got to eat for a TV show. That we just broke open on a table that was not sanitized in any way shape or form we scooped off of there don't spit on it please you could show that to people in 100 years ago this is how it started and they'd believe you yeah also like i remember when romesh did the did it and ate it all off of the so romesh eats like virtually the entire watermelon off of the floor. And then at the end has it stringing out of his mouth

and he's going to be sick. Daisy took two mouthfuls and then was in that state immediately. It was immediately going to be sick. And it escalated a lot quicker. I mean, she was eating for two going to be sick. Yeah. And yeah, it escalated a lot quicker. I mean, she was eating for two, to be fair. Yeah. Maybe should have had some points deducted for that. That baby, what a confusing day for the baby.

Yeah. All of a sudden. This hasn't been in my diet ever. And now it appears to be the biggest quantity of anything I've ever eaten. So Johnny Caster number one, they had a much harder task on their hands because they had to social distance so they had to basically dangle bits of watermelon

into their mouths from sticks but still did a great job still on occasion made me feel sick though well done them that they could still do it I wouldn't have done it the way they did it I mean you would have put it in a cannon and fired it at their heads well yeah I would have actually and it probably would have put it in a cannon and fired it at their heads.

Well, yeah, I would have, actually. And it probably would have worked. Yeah, if the cannon was there anyway, if you'd got that earlier. I would have said, can I have a whole melon instead, please? And got this sliced stuff. Yeah. And then just fired a whole melon at Johnny Vegas's head. Yeah, and then they would have had to have released a BBC News article.

It was an obituary for Johnny Vegas. Yeah. Catherine didn't eat much for a 22 stone woman. No interest in that, isn't it? That didn't get bought up again later on. Oh, interesting, Catherine. You didn't eat anything of that melon, 22 stone apparently.

Now, I think a lot's going to be said about Daisy and Richard being such a visceral and sick-making experience to watch. But I think it pales in comparison to Johnny Vegas eating some watermelon and then saying, I want daddy's watermelon. I don't even remember that. He looked at Moana and he said,

I want daddy's watermelon, which is the most horrific phrase of all time. But I think, yeah, so Daisy and Richard, five points for eating a kilo. I mean, but the lion's share of that is Daisy, isn't it? Yeah, and also I do think it's unfair when it's like they're doing different tasks, you know.

Yeah. They're doing different ones, but I like watching it. I like watching them have to do something different. I mean, I can only imagine if the other team had done it before social distancing, what that would have looked like. The three of them in a triangle triangle just feeding the person to their right and having to eat it oh well maybe they can get together for a reunion episode and try it again so the studio task which we'll talk about briefly uh it's the words you've got to list as many words

with a certain amount of letters and there's a letter added on each round again it's the words you've got to list as many words with a certain amount of letters and there's a letter added on each round again it's one that panics you a couple of things to talk about here obviously daisy just because it was like they dropped in a 19th century docker to the game uh calmly seeing a gap in the market for swear words and just going for it and it's essentially yeah genius and won the game by pluralizing all the same words yeah i looked so delighted when she went i love daisy's face when she wins yeah absolutely ecstatic looks like it's about to split in two she's so happy i just don't think yeah she wasn't expecting to win the word based one yeah but she did what she

was good at she went for the swear words and she absolutely nailed it and the blank face she had while she was reeling them off she didn't she wasn't finding it funny she wasn't finding it amusing she wasn't proud of herself she was just like a robot like a big swear robot yeah it's like let's just get this done yeah i'm gonna win this i'm not gonna go for these fancy words like the rest of them brilliant i loved brilliant and equally brilliant because richard herring really thought he was going to win that whole thing. Richard Herring's face. He's very well educated.

He was devastated, wasn't he? I love a genuinely gutted face on Taskmaster. Where you can see that the person is really caught up in the competition of it all and wants to do well. I love it. Because when it was declared that Moan and Richard were out in the competition of it all and wants to do well, I love it. Because when it was declared that Moana and Richard were out in the same round, Moana did a funny, like, oh, appalled face, like,

oh no, like that, and Richard's like, oh no, it's Christmas Day and you're taking the board game a bit too seriously. Wank, fuck, shit, buns, tits cock task mask so at the end of the episode we have johnny in last place on 15 points then muwan on 17 points katherine on 20 points. Daisy on 24 points.

And the winner of another episode, it's not his first episode, he's won, 26 points. It's Richard Herring, which makes the series points very interesting. Mouan and Catherine sort of hovering around the bottom,

but very close to each other, 67 and 68. That's 67 to Catherine, 68 to Mouan. Then Johnny, 74 points. Then a little bit of a leap up, Richard Herring, 85, but Daisy still in the lead. that's 67 to Catherine 68 to Moanne then Johnny 74 points then a little bit of a leap up Richard Herring

85 but Daisy still in the lead with 91 points very interesting now you've seen every episode so far James do you have any predictions? well

it's difficult I'd love it if Daisy won I think I think she's a great great competitor. A real credit to the game. Mouane, if he doesn't finish in the top three, I'm going to be annoyed.

I think it's unfair what's happening to him at the minute. He's got some real highs, but his lows are very low. He's a very entertaining player, for sure. I think Daisy's lows are very low and she's still managed to be number one. Yeah, but her lows are the prize task. I don't know. I think they're more consistent. As you well know,

consistency is what wins Taskmaster. Yep. I was consistent. No, you had ups and downs as we talked about at the beginning. Emotionally. Because your tasks were ups and downs as we talked about at the beginning emotionally yeah because your tasks were ups and downs recently the taskmaster a youtube channel um put out the very first task on my series yeah but full task i watched it even though i was there and and g Greg gives us all our points and Kerry wins the task Jess is second Rod's third

I'm second from bottom and Phil is bottom first task and that's where we all ended up at the end of the series interesting your prediction is that the series will end up with the exact rankings of the first task of the series. That's a very, very interesting theory. And I'm thinking about my series, and I think I won the first task proper. There we go. Of the series which was Hide the Aubergine.

Very good. And you hid that aubergine real well. And I think Greg Davis makes his mind up about people on day one, and he doesn't change it. And that is what the whole series revolves around, baby. So you watch. We have some emails, James. A lot of people got in contact.

They had some questions for you about your series of Taskmaster. James, you famously had some interpersonal difficulties with your teammates, one in particular. But who would be in your ideal Taskmaster team? Would you prefer a team of two or three? And who would be in your nightmare team? That's from Troy. So I think we'll say it's from past Taskmaster contestants. Who would be in your nightmare team? That's from Troy. So I think we'll say it's from past Taskmaster contestants.

Who would be in your dream team? Who would be in your nightmare team? Well, I think when... I know that when I was there for Team Task Day, I wanted to be on the group of two. I wanted to be in the team of two. Yes. So I think I'd want to be in the team of two.

I think that would be easier. And thinking about all the past Taskmaster contestants the person that I'd probably be thinking on the level with is the champion of champions Nish Kumar I mean see that's your dream team. Not your dream team, I'm hoping, in terms of getting points. Yes, getting points. We would win. It would be the biggest disaster in Taskmaster history if you and Nish were on a team together. I've seen you two together. You can't get anything practical done in the pub.

That's not true. Here's what would happen, and you know this is true. You'd mess something up up and nish would scream laugh until he was dead okay so i have correct i presume you're basing this on everything the fact that we had to do the door at joshua dickens wedding and instantly i put my hand in a cactus is that what you're talking about that is one in a litany of examples james okay well maybe it would be difficult but i think i think we would be thinking on the same page and that's what you need look you'd have a laugh i think you'd have a laugh i don't think you think on the same page what you

do is shut the book and throw it in the toilet um sometimes that's the way to win a task you'd have a nice time but you would be an awful team tell me james who would be on your nightmare team rod well yes so you've already been on your night i think my nightmare would have been turning up and it was just me and rod i mean thank god phil was there to be honest like phil was at least there to be the middle man and to you know uh he's a very chill presence. Yeah. He's a bit more laid back and stuff. So, like, at least Phil was there. If the three-person team had been Jess, Phil and Kerry, and then me and Rod had just been the two of us,

and I had no way... Do you think you would have physically come to blows? Maybe. I mean, he's just lucky that on the day, I didn't know there was stuff in the garage when he opened that garage i mean it was bad enough what i thought had happened which is just him for no reason going off and doing a worse version of what we were doing on his own and meaning that we didn't do anything that was bad enough but that was one of my favorite moments of

your series not the rant afterwards that was very good obviously, a lot of people talk about that, but it was when Phil gets tempted over to Rod's side, when he literally, Phil just like, he just wanders over like Winnie the Pooh. Yeah, he goes he goes over to reprimand Rod and be like

you shouldn't be doing this Rod, and then Rod's like can you pick that up, he's like yeah just this bit and then when I come round and say what, it gets drowned out a little bit, you can't really hear it but and then rod's like can you pick that up it's like yeah just this bit and then when i come around and say what it gets drowned out a little bit you can't really hear it but i say what's going on and phil goes they're very charming the irish it's reasoning hello james my question is can we get a full rendition of pants on a stick on spotify that's from emerson well yeah i mean you I mean, you know, if you work, Emerson, if you work for a record label, let's talk. We could drop Pants on a Stick.

I'd love to have it on Spotify. Are there more verses and choruses that we didn't hear on the show? Do you think now you could give us a little longer rendition? You know, like in the Fresh Prince theme tune where there's a secret verse that you can only hear on the pilot.

Is there more Pants on a Stick? Pants on a Stick, waving from side to side pants on a stick whose pants my pants your pants no no they're my pants on a stick they're so clean i put them in my washing machine on pants setting and they came out and i dried those pants i dried them on a stick and I waved them around until they could fit on my dick. Thank you, James. That was wonderful. And also, well done on resisting the dick rhyme until right at the end. Thank you very much. I'm surprised I didn't think of it when I actually did the show. Dear James, how much do you regret the circle task from jacklyn in the us and could you also give us a little summary as to what the circle task was well like there's a lot of moments where

you don't remember doing the task and um i i don't remember doing it i definitely don't remember misinterpreting it i didn't think i misinterpreted it at the time but it was a sweep the biggest circle in one motion biggest just make the biggest draw the biggest circle or make the biggest circle right yeah you had to do it in one sweep and um i mean i watched it back and i kind of i read the task out yeah so i definitely know what it is. And then I stand up and I say, I know exactly what I'm going to do. And I'll say, you're coming outside. And I must have, on the way from the living room to the outside, just forgotten what the task was. Because I then, I definitely didn't do it.

I know I didn't do it on purpose for a laugh. I didn't deliberately go, ha ha, this isn't really it. I definitely thought that cycling in a big circle on a bicycle while spinning a hula hoop around my neck. And this was pre-hula hoop task. I didn't even know I had that coming down my neck. Maybe that's what gave Alex the inspiration. Yeah, he was like, this guy, he's the guy for the hoop task.

And I, for some reason, thought that would count and that would be me sweeping a circle. I guess because I'm like like I'm going in a circle on the bike and I guess all I'd thought was I'll do a big circle on my bike and when I went to get the bike I'd seen a hula hoop

and I thought well I'll just incorporate that into it do an extra circle, why not I definitely don't regret it I feel that there's probably still an argument to be made for it it was uh early days i think it was almost the second episode i didn't yet feel that confident arguing against greg davis especially when he gave me his teacher like stare and he looked angry but uh i would still argue that if they had done a drone shot

of that task then they would have seen how big the circle that i cycled in was and they could have they could have counted that but they didn't that's the thing that's the thing they don't bother doing the drone shot they don't bother and that's not my fault and everyone else had done circles that you know when you finish doing the circle you can still see it i think that was probably uh draw i think it was draw the biggest circle so i think draw does yeah it worked against me yeah yeah it worked the wording of the task no no no no the wording of the task didn't work against you you worked against the wording of the task uh well again you're using language there to make me sound like i'm wrong correct you thought i've been told I should draw the biggest circle,

but what I'm going to do is ride around aimlessly on a bike whilst badly spinning a hula hoop, and then I'm going to crash, accidentally notice there's another circle in the floor, and try and claim that as part of my attempt. That's my reading of what I saw. Have you got anything different to add? My eyes are circles.

James, thank you so much for coming on the Taskmaster podcast. Would you rate your experience on the Taskmaster podcast from one to five points, please? Oh, always five points. Always five when it comes to Taskmaster. Fully enjoyed it. Fully enjoying this series. Oh, Ed, did you spot my cameo in this series, by the way? I didn't,

no. Me and my entire cast have made a cameo in this series. Ah, yes. Okay, well, yeah, we're not talking about you as a human being. Yes. We're talking about the knitted versions of you. Yes, in the birdcage. And that's what Johnny put in the bag to tempt the security guard.

And yeah, you're all knitted in the birdcage. Very fond memories of that. It did win the task. So there you go. bag to tempt the security guard yeah and yeah you're all knitted in the birdcage very fond memories of that it did win the task and it's normally that oh that's your point proved i suppose isn't it yep it normally hangs in the caravan i have very fond memories of it um james thank you very much uh you've been a wonderful guest on the taskmaster podcast. And yes, I'll say you've won this series just to give you a little boost. Thank you, Ed. Let me read your menu back to you,

see how you feel about it. Well, there we are. That was episode five of the Taskmaster podcast. Lots of interesting chat. Nice to hear that James has some conspiracy theories about the editing. He is our first taskmaster truther that we've had on the show uh but i think there was a lot of stuff in

there to enjoy including the full version of pants on a stick i think it's going to break the internet um thank you very much for listening we will of course be back next week with another special guest if you want to get your questions in for me and our special guest you can email taskmasterpodcast at gmail.com that's how you get your questions to us uh so some brilliant questions for james there couldn't get through all of them uh maybe we'll have james back on uh in the future at some point you never know who knows what we're going to do with this podcast next week's guest i'm very happy to say it's another season seven alumni it's jess nappet jess nappet is coming on the show cannot wait to chat to jess about her series this series and of course her very famous fall from the runway in the

taskmaster studio it is one of the clips of television that i have watched most in my life i love a bit of slapstick. Possibly rivaled now by Johnny falling off the ladder, but in terms of Taskmaster Hall of Fame falls, it's right up there, so we'll be talking to her about that, of course. If you can't get enough Taskmaster content in your life, go on the YouTube channel, youtube.com forward slash Taskmaster. There's some excellent outtakes going up there,

including one about a fart that went up recently. And if you're buying Christmas presents, as you should be now, get them in early. Taskmasterstore.com. There's lots of lovely Taskmaster goodies up there. But thank you very much for listening. We'll see you again next week with a wonderful special guest, Jess Knappett. Email taskmasterpodcast at gmail.com with your questions, and we will see you then. Goodbye. Over my shoulder. Older and older, and we will see you then. Goodbye. Over my shoulder. Older and older. That's what I told you.

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