Tea at Four - David Harbour's bizarre letter to Lily Allen, problematic Kardashian lollipop & meeting our icons

Episode Date: November 6, 2025

This week we have loads of spilled tea, from Billy’s recent inside scoop about meeting icon Kim Kardashian, to uncovering David Harbour’s red flag letter that he sent to Lily Allen.We debate the Kourtney Kardashian’s latest lollipop release, is this helpful or is it anti-feminist? Are runners less annoying to date than smokers, and is it worse if someone checks your phone versus hides theirs?Send us your dilemmas, tea or quite frankly anything you find funny to [e-mail].💖 Watch on YouTube https://www.youtube.com/@Teaatfourpod💖 Follow on TikTok https://www.tiktok.com/@four.nine💖 Follow on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/fournine/?hl=en Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

If you run and I don't, you think I'm fat. Absolutely. Absolutely. It's like, no offense, but people with six packs just don't have personality. Hi guys, welcome back to T-H4. I'm Lauren. I'm Billy. I'm Christy, and this is the podcast where we talk all things that normally stay in the group chat.

Sorry, I have to get this off my chest. That's who I met this week. Who did you meet this week? Just a little person called Kim Kardashian. Right. What a big fat flex? Big fat flex. The scariest.

I think that's the scariest person I've ever interviewed. Yeah, it was like everyone else I kind of like sit there and you get nervous because you don't want to mess up but with her I was like I don't think it can't know how nice she is. How did she smell like? I couldn't smell her she was too far away

but she had like there's so many people outside like her team and that's what made me like even more nervous because normally there's not that many people and you just wait to go in there was just like photographers walking up and down makeup artist

you could have been on her Instagram story did you check you could have been on her Instagram story really Well, sat there, sweating in the corner. If she had all her people in there, Billy. I don't think people are taking fucking pictures of the halls.

They're taking million pictures of her. Yeah, but I'm pretty sure her people are very much... Inside, no, inside knowledge. They have allocated time for socials. What? That was something she was like, I overheard people be like, oh no, she's got socials at three,

so we're going to be doing all about then, so she needs to be finished by, da-da-da. What do you mean by that? Like, when she can post? So, no, when they, like, film their socials. So, like, they'll do TikToks together, and they'll film content, for socials.

Wow. Although I do have a big bone to pick with one of the photographers. I'm sitting there, mind of my beeswax, about to go in. He goes, has anybody ever said you look like someone? Like who? Excuse me? What? Sam Glaflin.

Yeah, Jonathan Bailey. What you got for me? He brings up this German artist. Stop. No offense to him. I'm sure he's great at what he does. However, his face. is not.

Oh gosh, Fischer. And to make things worse, he goes, it's the side profile. No, no, no, no. That's a hate crime. Hate crime. I'm minutes away from going into my interview.

Can I speak to HR? And he shows that to me in my face. He's shot in profile. That looks like Brendan Leeson in the wail. Billy, I'm so sorry, because that's really rude. I was, I know. I know. Is that the picture he showed you?

Because that's black and white. The exact photo he showed me. He was like, he was looking at it. He was like, he was looking at it. He was like, he was like, he was like, maybe it's a side profile. Yeah, that's clap. Bear in mind as well,

Billy came back from this thing and told me this story. And at the end, my mouth was a gape, aghast. And I thought, instead of saying German artist, I thought he said a German Nazi, which is really added to the story as well. He wasn't. He's not. That is awful.

No offense to this man, whoever this man is. I just was maybe expecting him. Also, is this person famous. He's a very famous German artist. Not Nazi. And he was like, I clearly didn't take it as a compliment. I was like, in the words of Gemma Collins. Right.

Right. And then he goes on to say, he's one of like the most successful artists of our generation. Oh, not trying to make it sound better. Give the fuck, it's but ugly. Cool. Cool. I don't go to be on camera now. Look at her.

Oh, what? That's Fisher. I bet you're standing just like this. I wouldn't move my face. Like, there's no side profile for there. You'll catch up you like this. So yeah, that's how I'll be doing my junkie. Literally.

Oh my gosh. How dare he to do that? Thankfully he did that after I'd interviewed Kim because I was already too nervous for that. Oh. Yeah. He just embellished the story, bad bitch. What do you mean?

You said before you were about to go meet her. No, interviewed Sarah Paulson and Naomi Watts. I also interviewed that. Sorry that. Sorry, sorry. Sorry. Sorry. Sorry.

That's absolutely jakes. Just the reference. How do I spell that? I tell everyone that you just call me the blob. Oh my God. So yeah, great meet and Kim. Other than that. Thankfully, I hasn't tarnished my experience with the Kim Kardashian that much.

But her photographer count your days. Wow. He's watching the world. She's so nice. Oh, gosh, gosh. Well, you obviously aren't the only person to meet their kind of idol and celebrity dream. Christy, show the stage. I was on Woolford.

I was in EastEnders. I was on the set. And I saw Cat Slater and Zoe Slater, baby. Honestly. Hollywood royalty. I know a dream. Any British, UK soap lover. You know the feeling right now.

Was she just like herself? She's amazing. Her character, her vibe, her jokes. She's tiny, by the way. For the first time in a long time, I felt very tall. because she's quite short and I'm tiny

Are they filming Eastenders in Michigan land? I'm not gonna like I feel like they Dre's, they know how to get them angles because I thought she was taller but honestly

she is amazing and those other like class members just walking around so I saw Ravi that's sexy sexy man sorry to my I was gonna say because apparently they use

like filming blocks for certain small actors probably because what's her name? Peggy she was tiny apparently um

um bruise Ombreuse? Ombruse. Tom Cruise. Oh, for God's sake. He wasn't going to say his name. It's so short.

Who's that any stenders? No, but he has to use a block apparently. That might be a vicious lie, but I thought I've heard. Spread it, spread it, spread it. Yeah. Question, did you ask her about Phil then? Well, she had a jumper that had Phil, like, is it Philly's Navidavid? Philly's Navid.

So she took it to give to Phil. So hopefully one of these days on social media you might see, you know, Phil were rocking it. Or maybe their Christmas party photos. Did you, did you like in Greece? did you spray it of your own perfume? No, of course not. I hate to trump that story, but I actually had to try it on for fitting purposes first.

Oh my God. Feels going to smell your B-O. Am I skabies? Billy's DNA on film this. Oh my God, such a trendsetter. But no, honestly, it was... Was that the best day of your life? Yeah.

Yeah, it was, guys. Please, for you guys. And also, I did say if they're ever looking for someone someone to play Patrick's granddaughter, I'll be her. I see that for you. Yeah, mine.

Give me some land. He's probably going to die soon as well. Oh, don't say that. No, no, no. You can't wish that. No, you can't say that. Don't wish that. Yeah, but yeah, I'd so play the characters.

Are great. How exciting. I love that. Love it. Well, after a very fun celebrity-filled week, should we play a game of celebrity? Ooh. It's my magic pink ball.

Your magic pink, you should get that checked. Yeah. There's a cream for that, right? A cream. Fans and cover note, David Harbour wrote to blank that is sinister in Mindsight. Lily Allen. Lily Allen.

Did I write Mindset? Said Mindsight. It's not a word. Oh my God, so your H's looks like M's. He can't read. It does look like Marba and Mindsight. Right, so have you seen the letter that David Harbour wrote to Lily Allen? No, drop us the two.

I haven't seen it. Oh, my God. It actually made shivers. down my spine. It's the guy that plays in Stranger Things, right? Yeah, he's from Stranger Things. Who did he play again? The doctor or something?

No, plays... The guy that was driving the car. Is it a name Hopper? Hopper. Hopper. He was driving the car a lot of the time. He's just an old man that's just there. Fair.

The whole law at the moment is Lily Allen has just brought out her new album, West End Girl, and it's talking a lot about David Harbour, her now ex-husband, who was caught cheating. You kind of guess they were in an open relationship, something like that. But from all of this coming. out, we're now looking back at the kind of relationship timeline with our sad little life, Jane's. And

when she was in this show on the West End called 2-2-2-a-go story, was it 2-2-2? 2-2. How many 2-2? 2-2-a-go story. He sent a really weird note to her on like her opening night with some flowers. Oh. And I'm going to read it out to you because I'm going to feel sick.

My ambitious wife, these are bad luck flowers. Bad luck flowers. Because if you get reviewed well in this play, you will get all kinds of awards and I will be miserable, your loving husband. Back to send her. Back to send her. Divorce him then.

I would set those flowers alight and throw them through the letterbox. Is that the note? That's it. That's the note. Was it meant to be like, ban, is that dark humor, ban, oh, I'm trying to understand it. No, I genuinely think, like, in one of her songs, West End Girl, she talks about how he didn't like the idea of her getting a role without auditioning. I think he's very jealous and very, unaware.

of just how popular and successful Lily Allen actually was. Narcissist energy. Yeah, Nautsusis energy. What, Stranger Things He's only big kickoff? What else does he do? There's a clip also that's been going around from the Olivia Awards where Lily Allen was nominated for an award. Yeah.

And he's next to her and he butts into the interview and he's like, yeah, only like I was been in 100,000 plays, never been nominated or anything. But my lovely wife here, first time. Oh, he hates her. Yeah. He hates so bad. It's bad. People online are saying, do all men hate their wives?

Well, that's a bit of a reach because we shouldn't generalise based on one narcissistic freak. And how dare a man hate his wife? Makes his wife's success. Yeah. Also, that's dumb on him because Lily Allen was one of the biggest pop stars of the naughties. Like, she was such a cultural moment. I do feel like a lot of Americans, like, look down on UK, like, artists. A hundred percent.

Artist, actors. it's so weird because I get the US is huge is huge I get it but don't sleep on the UK a lot of UK actors singers have made the break to America and they're doing big things I feel like for him he needed to go through his research how can you not know your wife reality check thank you he clearly didn't know who his wife was when he married her

like the Lily Allen like all of her like that song not fair where she's like I spent ages giving head what she's like it feels really unfair I'm laying in the wet patch in our bed I'm feeling pretty darn hard done by. I spent ages giving head. It's like the song that goes, I think you're really me. Yeah.

She talks about head. She says head, yeah. Wow. And you think you can get away with this and her not to come out and absolutely destroy you on an album. Yeah. I think I, when you look back at like these kind of things that come up,

it's like, oh, well, they're signs. And people were kind of rehashing like their architectural digest of going around their house. And there's so many clips where he's, talking, you know, taking the stage, the minute that she chimes in, his face is like a fucking sack of potatoes. Have you seen the beginning of that video where he opens the door? And he says something.

He's like, what are you doing here? I told you not to come when she's here. And it's like he's pretending that he's having an affair with the person or like they've been sleeping together. That's really sinister. Maybe he's got main character problem because in that whole interview, that little after-shadegh thing, she, I think she says something and he kind of like just dismisses her and continue speaking.

And I'm just like, I need show what's the love between the two of you guys? Yeah. It's really sad. Like, I think, yeah, these kind of breakups, they do, like, I think that's why the album's doing so well. People are so invested. It's like when Myles Cyrus brought out flowers and everyone was like, it's about Liam, it's about Liam.

People love a little bit of like history and law. Yeah, I've got a bit of a hot take about Western Girl. And I don't know if anyone can relate to this, but I started listening to the album musically, gorgeous. But there's something I find so unnerving. hearing about someone else's traumatic, negative experience in a relationship, yes. And I don't know if it's because I'm extra sensitive because of the things that have happened this year. But I'm triggered for her and I just find it so like, I'm disconcerting, like hearing someone's horrible experiences like that,

hearing someone be in a relationship where they're clearly being like emotionally manipulated and abused. And it makes sense why I just listen to the same fucking album 65 times, e.g. Sabrina Carpenter. Because hearing stuff like that and like negative experience, it's not my bag. I don't know. All like bad movies or like Made in Chelsea. I don't like seeing horrible people being treated like shit. You think it's like normalising it almost? I don't think it's normalising it.

I just don't want to put that in my bubble. And I feel like I've got all her emotional relationship baggage so explicitly listed out that I don't know what to do with this now. But that's because you're an empath. Oh, really? Yeah. Like you're taking on her emotional baggage, whereas I'm just, kind of listening to it. It was me, Lily and David in the relationship.

There were three of us. There's three of us in this relationship. Yeah. Quite tricky. I feel like I'm there. I'm not very, for me, I don't tend to listen to music lyrically. It's all about like the melodic sounds. Right.

Okay. So normally like, I just don't really. You got that synthetine year. Yeah, I just like to listen to it and be like, boop, bo, bo, but with this one, like, paying attention to it, I think it's so smart. I feel for her, but I don't feel the emotional baggage for her. Really? No.

I think it's like a release for it. It's like, yeah, I'm airing out all our dirty laundry the way I want to, the way you guys are going to hear it. And this is basically the tea that I'm giving you guys. So if you guys want to dissect it and break it down, you have your fun. You know, at the end of the day, it's helping her boost, put more money inside her account. And that's what we're here for, you know what I mean?

Because did you know, David Harbour's going to earn like $9 million for Stranger Things this year? Oh, he's still in it? Last thing on this one, very funny, that she, one of the songs, I think Pussy Palace, if you listen to it sounds like the opening title track of Stranger Things. Genius. Genius. Is it? Yeah.

It's got that really weird, like, synthy sound. And also he's going to do a press tour this week or next week to show comes out. She timed it correctly. Go you sister. That's the UK type of petty we love. Yeah. And that's a home period. I eat that shit up.

Yeah. So Hopper likes butt plugs. Butt plugs, lubes. Trojans. What's that? What is a Trojan? Isn't it a condom? Oh, is it?

Oh, I was imagining like little, like Trojan horses. Yeah, little, loads of people inside. His ass. Not heard of a Trojan horse sex toy before. Christy's like, what? Should I take it? Yeah. Okay.

Take it. Take it. Take it. Take it. I like Trojan horses up his ass. Oh, like Barbie horses. All right, I'm speaking, guys. Thank you.

Gosh. Have you read it yet? Yeah, I have. I made sure I'm revised it. Okay, cool. Courtney Kardashian's blank lollipop branded beyond gross.

Vigina. Vigina lollipops. Can you guys actually imagine a lollipop for your vagina? But isn't it just like probiotics? I really see what the problem is. Huh? It's just like nourishing your body with like...

No. Do you know why I think this is magic? You're not putting it up your vagina. Yeah, I hear it. But can you imagine? Yeah. I went to a girl school. So imagine this is English class

and all the girls. in that class are sucking on this lollipop. Yeah, so Courtney Kardashian with her brand Lemmy, which is like supplements, has brought out a little lollipop, which is supposed to be for the wellness of your vagina, which seems massively unnecessary. It seems like another thing

that unfortunately celebrities are profiting off the insecurity of. I personally have grown up with this quite toxic narrative that kind of girls should be obsessed with the taste and the smell of their vagina. Things like this is not going to be held One, I don't think Courtney Kardashian gives a fuck about the health and wellness of your vagina. I think she just wants some money and wants to one up the pubants. But two, I just think like how unnecessary, what absolute landfill?

Have you seen that fucking product on TikTok where it's like lollipop that you suck it in to play's music? No, I've not seen that. Well, exactly. Pointless. It's useless. It's another thing like that. It's just so unnecessary. I don't know why, I don't know, maybe I'm just coming from a male perspective,

but you both have quite worked up about it. And I just feel like it's another place. Okay, Billy. It's just a supplement, right? That's in the form of a lollipot. Be a girl. Be a girl for a day. Like, she's made a supplement in the form of a lollipop.

Okay. Well, turn it round the other way. So obviously this isn't the first thing, but like, I just don't think there is the same obsession or like male celebrities, always trying to casually cultivate. Something like a male penis, like, What's the word? Male penis.

Sweetener. Sweetener. Yeah, but like, I think when I was reading it, it's not, I didn't even say that. It's not just, like, to sweeten the taste of a vagina. It's like, to give you, like, the right bacteria. Yeah, but how do you know you sucking that lollies going to the vajajee? But it's just to help your, like, entire, like, I imagine it's like your gut health. No, but scientifically, I don't understand how you suck this lollipot that's got pineapple and vitamin C in it.

It goes down through your body and it's like, oh, I'm supposed to land on your... Let me just show here and clean. It don't make no sense because it's self-cleaning, right? Yeah, but doesn't it just then help the bacteria and the natural? Like it just pro-biotics that. Probiotics that. Yeah. It's a little gimmick that's kind of got like some nutrients.

Exactly what it is. A little bit of a strain. Like why a lollipop is giving kids? Yeah. It's a really good point. Yeah. The fact it's in the form of something so casual like a lollipop. who's this aimed at?

Because me as an adult it's not going to be sucking on a fucking vagina lollipop on the way to work, am I? It's a weird product, I think, to sell. Like, yeah, like you say, also if you know what it is and you see someone with it, you're a bit like... Yeah, you just don't see, like,

the Justin Bieber's coming out with a lollipop that's going to be focused on the taste of a man's seaman. Do you know what? I don't... It's not bizarre for me to hear it that it's from Courtney. Because I feel like Courtney's been the wild card of the Kardashians anyway.

I mean, wasn't she the one that pulled out her baby? live on TV. That's not that random. But she's crazy like that. So I thought she's like, you know what? I'm going to do it. You know, sock on this lullie and clean a vagina.

Wind up, guys. Jump on. Get some fem fresh, babe. Don't have to pay £12 for six lollipole. Wait, how much is it? I do agree that maybe I think certain celebrities are now pushing for shock value factor for brand awareness. And that's where it's maybe coming from because it's like so random and it's clearly making headlines.

Yeah. And that's exactly what they want. But I think that narrative that we have to be obsessed over this kind of, I get the health part, but definitely the taste and the smell of our vagina is such an unnecessary insecurity to be focusing on. Yeah. And women buy into it. That's the thing, like the pub pants. They sold out.

Sold out. But that's again like shock value. People want to know what it's like and want to try it. And then I don't think it will necessarily be on the shelves forever. I mean, I'm definitely not buying that. You don't need to. Oh, thank you. Freshman.

I was talking about the pub. dickers. No, I don't know. Glall. Thank you. Thank you. Blank, blank announces retirement after body shaming. Nellie Fetardo announces that she's quitting music and now all the press are saying it's because

of body shaming comments that were made in the summer. But she's not once said it's because of that. And she's not once actually addressed the comments, which is really weird. And so all these publications are saying that because in the summer, she got a load of hate online and people were saying some horrible stuff about her like her appearance and her weight that that's the reason that she's now like quitting music to do other stuff I feel that's so rude how can you start a rumor and then now everybody then again it's always the tabloid isn't it and then now she's gonna have to address it one day if she if she wants to do but I do feel like can you imagine let's say for instance she wants to go into a new venture and that's the thing oh yeah this is a flop because of x y z that's crazy that's crazy that's crazy you're Crazy. Slightly slept. No, but it's kind of the same.

But Lou Teesdale, One Directions hairstylist and friend of, OK, let me land. Of course. Best friend of Caroline Flack went on to a podcast. And she spoke about around the time of Caroline's death, the Daily Mail or a publication, wrote like 90 articles in the space of one month about her.

This kind of is the same thing of like, she's not come out directly or spoke about it herself. She's not advocated for herself. But all these media. outlet saying it's because of body shaming. She stopped music because of her weight. It's doing exactly the same thing. Putting words into someone's mouth that it looks like it's real.

Yeah. And the way they do it is they say following. Yeah. Do you know what I mean? So they'll say, Nelly Fetado quits music and performing following recent body shaming comments. So they're not actually directly saying it's because of that. But as a reader,

you're going to take it as that. Oh, it's because of that. And actually what they're just doing is like resurfacing these comments and then making an issue. the previous issue, the big issue again. 100%. It's giving authority to comment sections. It's changing narratives.

Yeah. Which isn't fair. Like she could have like, for whatever reason that isn't actually our business to want to quit music, it might be that like she didn't get the same vibe that she wanted from crowds or like she thought it was exhausting and she wants some more family time. But now everyone is assuming that she has a different, separate issue. Yeah. And that's not fair.

Yeah. So quit it! Not you, Nellie. Yeah, not you. Thought this would be a fun little segment to do because I saw one of my favorite podcast ride with Benny Skinner, Mary Beth Barone. They debated this following statement.

What would be worse to date? A smoker or a runner? I want to hear your thoughts. Runner. I want someone that I can cheer with and have a good yap and have a bag. 100%. There's something subconscious.

If you run and I don't, you think I'm fat. Absolutely. Absolutely. It's like, no offense, but people with six-packs just don't have personality. Benny, actually, Benin's kid that does have a six-pack. And he does have a brother. So maybe he's gay. He's gay, yes.

But I still think even with gay, he's like, like, lack, I don't know. I need someone that doesn't care about running. Oh, absolutely. What do you think? Wake up. What are you doing? I'm just like speaking in your head. I'm trying to think, which one of you better?

Because a smoker, at least, you know, we can have, like, downtime and, and, and chill and talk. Also, smoking is sexy, sorry. Ah. I see, like,

all pictures of people with a fag on I look cool and sexy. I don't care. Really? Yeah. No, I think maybe you're runner

actually, because imagine I want to have a lie and it's like, babe, let's go up and run. Excuse me? Oh my God, get an actual line.

Do you know what I mean? Like, if they idolize it and it's like, you know, the top on their list of what to do, I'm just like,

oh, maybe not. What are we running for? No, literally, what we're running from? Yeah, actually. There you go.

I watched a TikTok blog this morning of this really energetic boy in New York and he was like my five to nine for my nine to five. And he was like bouncing about. He got up. He went on a run to a fitness class. Like a five mile run to a fitness class and then ran back. It's just not my cup of tea. It's called attention seeking for a reason.

I just can't do with that. I mean, I just about run for the bus. I don't even take the bus these days. I will not run for the bus. Oh, I run. Run for the bus for the train. You think you're going to mud me off like that? Absolutely not.

I'd rather be weight. I'd rather sometimes the doors are there, but I don't want to be seen. to run through the doors as they close I'll just wait for the next one. I'm not running or jogging for anyone. Okay. And I think just for our adult brittle bones it's really bad to run on concrete.

I think running's really bad for you. lung cancer is better. That's why you should smoke. It's really bad if you've got bad joints. Yeah, but also I've got some friends that smoke and they run better than me, so... True. That is true. I can't run.

Maybe that's the balance. We run with lock knees. smoke at the same time. Yeah, great then. I love that kind of conversation. We've got another one. Yes, I think that vaping is made smoking cool again. I think that's what's happening.

I fucking hate vaping. Oh, yeah. You think vaping has made... Yeah, because vaping is so uncool. And I do it all the time. I'm just not cool enough. I do agree with that. Well, I'll tell you what is a disease, not the lung cancer, not the running disease.

Vaped D.HD.H. VAPD-D-HD is a special form of ADHD where people that vape have to get up from their fucking seat every 15 minutes and they've come back and forget what they were doing which makes for a very unproductive workday Sounds like she's shading somebody on the set I'd rather have that then OBCD Oh what's that?

Well you got both so how you're coping True I do have both What's OBCD? Yeah, obesity What does it sound like? You're not fat He said that back to me about 15 times now Thank you. Everyone's telling me that I'm not fat.

I did it to you first. But you've got fat ever. I honestly, be it, babes, just have a break. You know, treat yourself to a kick out of something. I do. If you don't like everyone having a little bit of vapour on their break after they've done a little task. Yeah, little, meaning, minuscule.

But I still get my work done at it in today. Dres, I just don't like the smell of the flavor. Same. Am I in a Shisha lounge? Like, what the heck? Oh my God, kissing someone when they've got strawberry shortcake plus lunch. not put a mint down your mouth or something. You two are so pressed.

Oh my gosh. Chill out babes, yeah. I'm sorry we've not got crackle popcorn lungs. If I could smoke right now, I'd have a vape. Do you know what's so mad? I used to think vaping was so cool. I remember going on a holiday and I'll be like, Snapchat out, trying to talk like herbs and stuff.

Absolutely, that is so cringe. Actually, I don't know. I still think, I actually disagree. I do think vaping's cool and I think it's actually kind of loser for you both not to like it. No. But everyone does it now. Just got on with it. No.

And that's why Billy's not in the photo on the war Because he vapes Yeah, he was in there He went away and plough of smoke Do you want me to get really nasty? It's a wheel, actually. Go on to the next one. Is it worse if your partner checks your phone or hides theirs?

It's worse if he checks my phone. Hide theirs? No, I don't think it's that deep. What are you got to hide? But what's hiding? Hiding could be, let's say for instance, you're going out for dinner and my phone's face up, his ones face down.

I don't think that's a problem. I wouldn't want my partner to go through my phone. I feel like, yeah, it's a bit controlling. Yeah, going through my phone, it's like, let me see who you message today. Let me see who you can't. That's crazy. Why are you assuming that the partner has that intention by going on that?

Why else would you be checking my phone? I've never had a boyfriend. I'm funny, really hard to pick aside. But if I did have a boyfriend, what would you rather? I've got a thing to hide so they can check my phone all they want. This is what I feel like. I just don't understand.

I think I'd like the openness to check each other's phones. This is the thing. And I do, I obviously believe in words of affirmation. I believe in all the love language. I know sometimes you can feel that that boy is the boy you're going to marry. You're going to be there forever. But like if there's any niggle in my head that's just like, oh, I would just actually like to check up having an insecure moment.

Nothing done. No, do you know why? I do feel like, fair enough, you guys are in a relationship. But before you guys got into a relationship, you guys are both individuals. And I think it's very important, especially in a relationship that, you both have your individual moments and time. So if your phone is your place of like, you know, you conversate with your friends or you search up what you want to search up,

you're entitled that moment. I don't think anybody should go through anyone's phone unless you yourself giving that person, here you go, go through it. So I would rather, I think that's worse than if you're hiding your phone, okay, hide your phone. No way. That would trigger me, I think, if like someone was purposely hiding something. 100%.

And that's exactly how Lily Allen found out that David Harbour was cheating on her. this thing through her phone yeah because he was showing her a picture and then he quickly tried to hide it she sings about it wow what a dirt bag I don't know what counts us checking as well because like do you read your partner's phone over their shoulder because I do that all the time yeah I go who's that yeah what's that I do that with my friend's oh as well I think that I'll be like Lauren saying Billy's such a fat sweaty mess today I think that's fine snoring whilst awake it's like you know it's like when you're being very like invasion of privacy I think that's I think that's much.

But like, yeah, I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I feel like I don't have anything to hide. I'm so nosy though as well. I'd also just not like the fact that I'm not allowed to nose. Yeah. You will go into that phone and you'll find something that you're not meant to find.

And then all of us like, I don't know. How far are you looking? I'm just having a quick. I just like to have a little nose. What apps you got? Yeah, look over the shoulder. That's fine. But I don't, yeah, I don't know.

Yeah. It's my phone, your phone. Do we all. Yeah, actually, it's a big teller. I think how open you are of each other. occasion you're around and be like oh what is that and they're like what doesn't matter like oh you know i've been a relationship where someone's got like boys code that's a red flag oh hate that oh you can't see boys code yeah and they're all cheating on their girlfriends that's so gross i'm booking a

holiday without me that's that's lose behavior oh my god one time sorry can i just tell you a story please no sorry this is kind of drink when i was at uni um my boyfriend at the time we weren't official cheated on me whilst on drugs at a club, right? In the club? In the club? I wasn't there. I only found out because I got sent a photo of it the next day by

some random girl in the next flat. Shut up. And it became a whole thing and then after the drama finally subsided I was like, it was a big drama all in the same flat, right? After the drama finally subsided. Someone sent you a picture? Yeah, someone sent me a picture of it. There was a new there was a thing going around like the boys

in the flat rule in the kitchen and suddenly they started all laughing at their phone and I was like, it's funny. And then my boyfriend wouldn't show me the phone. And I was like, oh my God, what are you laughing at? And they were like, no, no, it's fine, it's nothing. And obviously I nicked the phone. And they all fucking panicked came at me.

And they'd made an edit of like the clubs sort of thing. And it was like another girl. And it was like tonight at Halo. And it was like them two together. And I was just like, are you fucking kidding me? And they're all while I'm in the room. While I'm in the room. I was just like, this ain't.

the first time I've even heard something like that. Something like that. I don't want to talk. Boys are, I know exactly what we were about to say, and that's what it was in my head. Exactly that. Boys are vindictive, evil. Nasty, stupid. Nasty, stupid.

Hi, guys. Not the guys in the room. No. But, like, that kind of boy code or, like, boy jokes, I hate it. Oh, my God. Not to that extent, but something similar, very similar happened to one of my friends, best friends. And I've never, like, let that go. And she has an Eva.

And it's just like... It's one thing to betray the trust of the person you're with, but to be friends with people that are going to laugh behind your back when you are suffering. What is the beginning of the most formative experience? Because like you, Bob's, that builds so much lack of trust. Yeah. Insecurity.

Oh, my God, issues with men. I just think, like, that is another form of, like, gross toxic men. So revenge porn. Revenge porn. Or just, like, really making jokes and laughing. after at the expense of the woman. Yeah. Absolutely.

And like not even thinking, actually, do you know, they think, they don't even think, first of them. But they also, when they do think, they only think about the guy it's impacting. Yeah. Not the girl. Absolutely. Castrate them.

Castrate them all. Sorry, Bob's. Oh, do you know what we need to send them? Strangle them with a pub thong. To the North Sea. Yeah. Let's take that to Parliament. So would you rather someone who never drinks or drinks,

drinks every day. Drinks every day. Drinks what? Alcohol. Oh. Use your brain. Someone, oh, please drink. Yeah, I can.

No, I don't have anything against sober people. Never do I. I just don't think I could be with someone sober. Oh, but this is the thing. So this is a weird scenario, but me and Cameron just moved into our new house. And we've had red wine three nights in a row just because we're out of when we can. And last night, he was like, Oh, look at us having red wine multiple days in the week, which such winkers, weekday drinkers.

And then about, I know, vile, vile, what in the whoville? You should take the eye out and change it with an A. Anchors. Wankers. Oh, yes, right. And then about three seconds later, he then poured this, oh, no, landlord, if you're watching this, you're not. The red wine fell onto the hardwood floors, and then we decided we were not going to be drinking. But sure, there's the week.

It's unnecessary. And then again, a sober life, you become a runner. So, no, thank you. Yeah, exactly. And you won't vape. Sure. I think life is about balance. So I feel like drink, but not drink every single day, but you know, social drinking.

My dad has, I drink a day. Yeah, really? He would have like a pint. I think it's good for you. You know, those little old ladies that live to like 109. Yeah. I had a wood to ski every night. All those Italian dinners, like, have like red wine every day.

Yeah. Like, not drinking. If someone, if I was with someone that was getting drunk every night. Oh, hell no. That's different. No, no, no. Don't fuck with my heart. Wonder if I won't be taking you home

if you're drunk like that. No. But I have some people on my Instagram stories that are out multiple days a week, like, you know, wine in the bucket. Where'd you get your money from? Where'd you get your money from? Do you know what?

I can't like. The day that I was T-total for a whole year, I saved so much money. And that was during COVID, right? Lockdown. So I'm pretty sure people would like, like people were having like, you know, clubhouse or FaceTime calls

and everyone's sipping. Right? I, oh, sorry. I went, I went, gin. Gym. On Zoom in a wig. That's crazy. I, yeah, I can't lie.

I think, yeah, you have to either have a lot of energy or you can't do a, you can't do a whole year about alcohol. Because that was crazy for me, but I managed to do it. I just, like, love life too much, you know. You love what? Life. I don't really want to spend my time with someone who doesn't vape, goes and runs, and doesn't drink. Life is sobering enough. So, bring enough.

That was deep, nests. I could deal with someone who's a runner, actually. I just don't want someone who's going to make me run. Right. Okay, we have a little dilemma here from a member of our audience, so we thought we'd hash it out and... Let's get into it. Okay, ever since I cheated on my boyfriend, my sex drive has gone wild.

I don't know what to do. I've never been a cheater, but I got drunk on a weekend work trip and slept. with my colleague. Hey. Should you point it at me? Excuse me? Where'd that rumour come from? Following line.

And it was incredible. Hey. We've done it a couple times. Right. You're like, let's interject and you said the same thing. Free time. I'm actually, Hey.

Hey. Hey. Hey. Sorry. Tequila. Literally. We've done it a couple times since and flirt secretly in the office. I also, oh, sorry.

Sorry. I don't, I, yeah. Office relationships aren't the one. No. I feel like the worst person in the world but I'm also scared if I can clean and the danger element of the sex is gone my sex drive will be back to zero

it's incredibly selfish but I never knew I had this kind of sexual liberation in me I like power to you for feeling sexually liberated Sexually sexually It's again like you're using somebody else to feel that and that you're hurting that other person which is wrong and shouldn't do that. Yeah.

So I disagree with it. Yeah, that's actually something in a book that I'm reading over the year, for evenings and weekends. And there's a storyline in that where they've got together based on like, you know, secrecy and just like spontaneous sex things here and there.

And then the minute that they actually got rid of like their significant others and then got together properly, they weren't asked. It's all about the excitement. Yeah. You know, the drama. So unfair. Like you can't, I think people,

can't use other people absolutely it's not bad it's not very nice very very nice what she should have done is maybe invested in some toys to be sexually liberated for herself or split out with your fucking boyfriend

you want to cheat also surely there's enough danger of like Trojan horse go have sex and symmetry of something you know find a thrill somewhere else oh god you're not done that what

like she's clearly got a thrill from like hiding her relationship so like I think okay fine do that someone at work, break up with the person you're with at the moment, and then keep that relationship a secret, and then maybe that will be... I think she just wants a bit of everything she wants.

She's greedy, that's what she is. She's really greedy because together you've got the emotional stability with your partner, but then you have to accept with somebody else. So it's like, I think no, she used to just find some time and refocus on what she actually wants, what liberates her, what she is emotionally lacking

and then go back into a relationship with somebody else. Yeah. Or maybe relationships aren't for her. Yeah. honestly. That's fine, but as long as you're staying in a relationship, you're hurting someone else. And that's not nice because imagine if that was you, you know, flip the thing on the script. And your partner might not be happy with it and they might do a really big expose album and call it West End Boy. And the fun ain't worth the risk at the end of the day.

And HR wouldn't really approve. I don't think I'd like a child mind, actually. I think it's a bit of a fetish. Yeah, I agree. It's the danger element, which is why. They should have sex in like random places because there's risk to it. Slightly illegal. Yeah.

Yeah. There's still a risk and no one's getting hurt. And that's all that matters. What? No one's getting hurt. I thought you said no one's giving head. No, it hurts. When?

Oh, yeah, agree. Well, I hope you enjoyed this episode of T-4. If you've got any dilemmas, you'd like to send us, you can reach us on emails, send it to us in our coptions. What's a caption? Comment and caption, I said. Nice. A copter.

A copter. The queen is coming. Yeah, email us or let us know in the comments. And if you enjoyed this, please give it a like and a share. Bye, bye, bitches. Bye, driver.