Tea at Four - I Help People With Disabilities Live Out Their Kinky Fantasies

Episode Date: March 6, 2026

What happens behind the closed doors of a "Dungeon Boudoir"? Today on Tea At Four, Billy and Lauren sit down with Spicy Saurora, a sexologist and dominatrix who is redefining what it means to be a "healer."From navigating sex with spinal cord injuries and muscular dystrophy to the viral world of inflatable fetishes, Saurora shares the unfiltered truth about her work. We ask the question; should intimacy be considered a part of human care?

I love kink and BDSM in my dungeon boudoir. Dungeon. Hey guys, welcome back to Tier 4. I'm Billy. And I'm Lauren. And this is the podcast where we talk all things that normally stay in the group chat. But not today. We are joined by a very exciting guest, Sorora. Welcome to Tierp 4, Sorora.

Thank you for coming on. So we know you online as spicy sororra. And you take an almost wholesome approach to sex work or being an escort. Could you explain a bit about what you do to our audience? Yes. So yeah, I guess I'm a sexologist, sex worker, body worker, whatever you want to call it, Dominatrix. And yeah, I help people live out their juicy fantasies and get rid of the shame around this and live a spicier lifestyle because why the hell not? I love that. How did you like get into it? So I have always been interested in this world from quite a young age. But obviously I was

bothered about people's opinions so I just tried to put that to the side and just ignore it and then my mum actually died in 22. I basically watched her just disappear she didn't have a partner for all my life which was 27 years

I was just like I don't want to see anybody else go down the route that she went down I want people to understand that you can have a spicy lifestyle you can enjoy yourself like I didn't even I kind of was hoping that after she passed and I was claiming a room at that I would find some vibrators And there was nothing.

I was just like, come on. So yeah, so then I, yeah, retrained to be a sexologist and then went down like the tantric massage routes and it's just sort of like snowballed from there really. For audiences and actually for myself, what does that, what is like tantric massages, sexologist? What does it mean? I mean, basically like sexologist is like basically a sex therapist, but I work with the body. So we basically live in a world that's very much like, oh, we'll just ignore our body and everything comes from our brain and we'll just be very mental and everything's sort of like brain heavy. And our body tells us so much like our bodies are beautiful and yeah, they have so many stories in there and we hold so much trauma there from when we were younger that now body workers are becoming more and more available and more and more understood.

And so that's where it sort of kind of like flows into being a sex worker. You're working with the body. Even if you're not trained, you're still being a healer. And as I like to say, hoses healers. And then the tantric massage stuff. Tantric massage stuff has been like warped for years now. How I understand it is that tantrum means being present in the moment. And so you can be sort of like tantric when you're cleaning your teeth in the morning.

And if you're like in the present moment and you're all like, I'm cleaning my teeth right now and I'm enjoying myself. And then you can go into like the sexy side of things where my tantric massage is a full body to body. So you would lie down and I would use my full body everywhere, bits and all to massage your full body, bits and all. To give you like a beautiful experience. But it's not very like you're not coming into basically ejaculate. And it's all about like, this sounds so cringy. about the journey, not about the destination. My God, come on, Molly Saras, the client.

So, yeah, that is what I am about and that's what my work is about. Everybody's got their own sort of little niche sort of thing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So one of your specialities as well is that you have a very inclusive clientele. You work with disabled people. Can you just talk, just chat a little bit about why and how you got into that? Yeah. Oh, I love my clients and we've got disabilities.

Yeah, so how did I get into that? So one, I was at. retreat. I was doing a kink workshop at a retreat and there was a woman there who has a disability. She got a spinal cord injury and she was in like a motorbike accident when she was like 18 and yeah, really bad. And I did this kink workshop and she loved it. Like she absolutely loved it. And then we just got a chatting after and she was like I'd love to have like a like a massage with you. I also do something called trauma release massage which again helps the trauma come out of the body so you can live a more beautiful lifestyle. And she's,

she has a scar on her back that she cannot look at really like struggles with it. And I think I'm maybe like the second or third person that's actually seen this scar because she hates it so much. And so I gave her like a beautiful session, massage ceremony, whatever you want to call it to help her reconnect with her body. Because pretty much everything from the waist down is like offline. She can't feel anything in her genitals. And she yeah, just had like the more apparently the most beautiful session and it was like, like transformational for her. And then she's actually a psychosexual therapist.

Oh, wow. But she's the only one in the UK that has a spinal cord injury. So a lot of people who have got spinal cord injuries go to her and then she passes them on to me. And then from then it just kind of like blew up. And then obviously social media helps. And there's also a website called TLC, which is a website for sex workers to advertise himself,

which are only for people with disabilities. Oh, so is it quite a common career? No. Like you can go on this website and there are people on there that are like, oh yeah, I'm a sex worker. I'm a sex therapist and yeah, you sort of like the person with the disability sort of like takes their pick of who they want, what they can afford, who they like the look of. There's not many people on there. What kind of range of disabilities do you see or do you work with? I've got a beautiful client. It's got muscular dystrophy and then cerebral palsy, blind, the shaken baby syndrome. I'm trying to. I got through them all. Usually, they've had like cerebral palsy. That seems to be like the main one. Spinal cord injury, but he also had a brain injury. He fell off a scaffolding pole, bless him.

Yeah, a lot of spinal cord injuries, a lot from accidents. And that one, it's really hard. I had one guy the other week. Oh my God, he was like this time last year I was walking. And now I'm in a wheelchair. And I was like, oh. Wow. So when you first started getting into working with disabled people,

How do you navigate that experience? Could you kind of walk us through what that would be like? Yeah, I mean, it's completely different for each person. I've got some clients that their carers contact me, their parents contact me. Do the parents like come with them sometimes? No, because I usually go to them. So like I had a client last week who, oh, bless him, he's got a shaken baby syndrome. So he was shaken as a baby. And he's such a lovely guy He's a comedian Like and he does sit down comedy That's what he's called because he's in a wheelchair Oh that's genius

He's so funny He's like so funny And yeah I got there And she was like oh hi The woman was like hi I'm mum And I was like oh okay Hi I'm still like This is still kind of weird

Like what do I say And she was like Oh I've been the one that's been emailing you Because he can't because his hands are quite like Like this And I was like oh right okay yeah, lovely to speak to you. She was like, what you're doing is absolutely amazing.

Like, I think everybody needs a person like you because people just see his disability. They don't see him as a person. So you call yourself also a conscious Kink facilitator. So many words. So many words. But I'm very intrigued. Like, how, what is this?

Yeah, so I love Kink and BDSM. I have from a very, very young age, like my toolbox was quite big from a very young age, which my mum would find. Oh, my God. She would find it. Like, what was all this about? And I'd be like, do you want to use some?

Because it might help you. Oh, wow. That's a new king, isn't it? Sharing your BDMS toys with your mom. Yeah. She always said no. Yeah. So yeah, conscious kink.

So yeah, kink can be conscious. It's not about coming in and getting a flogger and just whipping someone as much as you can. You can take someone on like a beautiful journey with it. I've taken people on gorgeous experiences to help them live out something. trauma or some shame or just to help them understand that you don't have to be the dominant one all the time. I have quite a few clients, I am going to say men, who have big jobs, CEOs, entrepreneurs and they're like, I just want to enjoy being submissive. And I just want to like handle my control over to you. Obviously, consent boundaries, communication and aftercare are all in there. And yeah,

I just let them lie back and think of England. Think of England. And I go to town on there. Obviously, we've had lots of conversations first. I make sure that they're all right and they're open to whatever they're open to and I understand their boundaries and limits and I don't cross those. But yeah, just help them understand that you don't have to be ashamed for wanting to enjoy kink. And kink can be anything.

It doesn't have to be floggers and cages and. what else do we see paddles and stuff like that um kink can be just be something that you're interested in that you don't get to be interested in every single day yeah i mean on a more personal question what is do you have a favorite i'm really into like head shaving and tongs what's that i used to have a shaved head and there is a head shaving fetish community oh really that are into shaving heads especially on women some people obviously really get off on it and some people obviously really get off on it. And some people just like just really sort of like into it is their thing.

But they don't need it to like get off. And so yeah, so I've got an undercut now and I love my head being shaved and I love shaving and I love sharing other people's heads. So that's one of my kinks. Wow. I've never heard of that one before. It's interesting.

Yeah, it's really interesting. Yeah. And this is why I love my work because I can help people understand that like you can, a kink can literally be anything. I know like foot fetish is like one of the biggest ones. And people seem see that as normal. but then you see like oh i've got a head-shaming kink and they're like it's just because people don't talk about it as much yeah exactly yeah and then tongs is

another one like because obviously people are into tongs and it's quite essential part of the body what tongues like the tongs oh your tongue i thought you meant like curling tongs so i know i thought we were still in the hair round so it's my fault there's a whole salon Come in for Yeah Yeah no tongue

Oh tongue Right Because obviously Some people have really big tongues And obviously it's quite erotic Yeah So yeah With the head shaving one

How do you discover that Might be so silly to ask But how do you discover that The line between a kink Or something That you just like doing on yourself A lot of people

discover it when they're younger Like a lot of our kinks come from when we were children and I know that sounds really weird. But it'd be really subconscious. You wouldn't even know about it. And then something happens and you're like, oh, I've got quite like that.

That's quite a turn on. I didn't even know that that was a thing. So for me, I loved going to the hairdressers when I was younger. Like, I loved going to the hairdressers. And then I started when I, I think, God, it must be about 10 years ago now. I started with an undercut. And then it just got higher and higher and higher. and then I was like, oh, I actually do really, really like this.

And then I retrained to actually be a hairdresser. And so I was like in the hair salon a lot. And so it just sort of started from then just having a little undercut and then realized, oh, I like this a little bit more than just getting an undercut. And then I discovered the whole community. She's bald. That was it. We've seen also from your socials that some of your clients have various kings,

one of them being inflatables. What does that involve? Literally having sex on inflatables, like an inflatable. shark, dolphin, Lilo, balls, massive balls. And yeah, we did that, I did that with one of my clients who's got a disability. And it popped. The shark pops. You want that happened.

Me and the swimming pool. No sex. One too many Pieda colladas. Do you have like any, like what are the other themes? Are the one that's more popular than others? The inflatable one seems to be like a popular. blue one at the minute, yeah. I get a lot of people messaging me about it,

but then I think they get a bit too scared and don't actually want to go through with it. Oh. Because I think they're a bit like, oh my God, actually, someone would actually help me live this fantasy out. What the hell? What would the layers of that one be?

Like if, like you said, that came from somewhere. Sometimes comes from balloons. So when you're like growing up, because there's a massive rubber fetish and like PVC fetish. And, yeah, obviously we are around.

on balloons a lot and then someone quite likes the feel of it and then for my client it kind of then moved into inflatables um which his mum came with to that one really yeah yeah i actually spoke to her on um on the video call yeah she was like i don't get it i don't understand it i don't know why he's into it but i'm here to support him i really rate that though like parents just being aware and not having any kind of judgment and like really realizing that you know they're really right that you know they're entitled to enjoy sex as much as much person. Yeah. Yeah. Exactly. Yeah. And it was so much fun. I actually met him in London and in a hotel room. And yeah, he brought like, oh my God, the most biggest inflatable ball I have ever seen in my life. It was huge. But he was like it would have taken

an hour to blow up. He was like, I just wanted to bring it to show it. Yeah. And I was like, that's fine. Wow. That does save you at least the hard job. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. Blowing up. How long would like the sessions last? something like that if you're blowing up for a good 90 minutes um some usually start two hours and I've gone up to five hours wow how do you mentally and physically prepare for those kind of sessions at the beginning I struggled I really really struggled and like my partner who is amazing was like you really need to look after yourself because you are going to burn out I really love my clients so much like I really want to help them um able bodied or disabled bodied I had to

then put in sort of like a boundary with myself of being like as much as I want to like click my fingers and there everyone would be fine it's their journey it's not mine and so now I sort of I'm able to just sort of like leave it at the door and be like that's their stuff I will help them as much as I can now I'm gonna go for a coffee I'm gonna have a coffee too a bit of aftercare yeah yeah yeah so at the beginning I really did struggle and I offloaded onto my partner a lot but now I don't really feel like I need to do that. I mean, that's just their stuff.

I help them. I gave them a really, really good time. Often when we hear disabilities, our mind goes to various disabilities. Are there boundaries for you as terms of which disabilities you won't necessarily work with? Yeah. And this is a really,

really grey area that the government are trying to sort of like figure out. So obviously like mental disabilities. So there are obviously, I'm going to say men who are 40, but might have a very young mental age. And how the hell you figure that, work with that? I don't know. I know, I went to a conference like a few years ago with care workers, therapists, social workers that are trying to figure this out.

There's a barrister there as well. He was like, because this is really important to him. And obviously the government are like, well, if he's got a mental age of four, then how, and he's a 40 year old, how do you even, yeah. So obviously I need to know a lot about the disability beforehand. And I need to speak to them because then I can determine where their mental age is at. Yeah. Yeah. So that one is a tough one.

Yeah. Yeah. A lot of these people understandably can't work. So they will be getting PIP. How do you feed that into how much you decide what to charge for clients? It's such an important job to be providing. And it also comes with a lot of responsibility, but also you have to obviously take into consideration

how much they can actually afford in the purse space. So how do you navigate that? Again, it is also really, really hard. I didn't expect that I would be changing catheters, sorting out machines, using hoists, getting ramps knowing how wheelchairs work helping people out of their car with like the wheelchair out of their van and understanding all the mechanics and stuff um and i ultimately i've got to make sure that they don't die because i've had experiences very very close to that yeah i had one guy who um oh is is a

brilliant he's got muscular distra fit and he's on a he's on a ventilator and i walked into the room and there was machines everywhere and i was like whoa and his mom was like, if the tube comes out of his nose, you need to shout me because we only have a few seconds. Oh my God. I've literally just got chills saying that. Yeah, me too. I was just like, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay.

And he's, oh, he's lovely, lovely guy, super chill, super funny. But I had to be so careful that that tube did not come out of his nose. Yeah. And there was one time, there was one time where, I had to learn how to use the beds because there's no training in this like there's training for obviously like care workers or nurses to work with people with disabilities

but there's no training in regards to sex workers or sexologists so I've literally learned on the job and I had to learn how to use the beds and they go up and down and they flip and do all these crazy things and I started like moving the bed and then all of a sudden like machines started beeping and I was like oh my god oh my god it's happening

it's happening, it's happening. And I was there with like, no clothes on. All my toys out, like, ready to give him my show. And he was there naked. And yeah, it all started beeping and I was like, oh, what do we do? And I was like, do you want me to get your mum? And he was like, I think you better add. And so I just had to put my clothes on as quick as possible.

Hide all the toys. Make it look normal. Even though she knew, obviously. but I was like, it doesn't need to be put in her face what we're doing. And I, yeah, I think I had my jeans on the, I just left my jeans undone and I would just look really dishevelled and just shouted his mum.

And I was like, you need to come that is beeping. We don't know what it is. And she just came in and she just started checking everything. She was like, oh, everything's fine. I think it's just like the bed because it was like an airbed thing. I think somewhere the air got stuck or something and it starts beeping. And I was like, oh, my God. Boner, killed.

Yeah. Oh my God. How much like, yeah, meditation you have to do after that. Yeah. It's just like, give me. Yeah. Yeah. And then to try and get going like, get back into my sexy mode after that.

So obviously there's things like that. Like I've got to make sure that they don't die. So obviously that comes with a price. But then I'm obviously not going to be like overcharging people. So I do ask what their situation is. And if they are, if they do struggle, I have like payment plans or, yeah, I'm just like I'll obviously do a discount for you. and just try and help you as much as I can.

And then I'm like, he needs to tell me everything. And if you look like something's going to happen, I need to know how many machines are there, what do you need? So yeah, I do that. You're an angel. Yeah. What's the kind of like reaction that you, do you get a reaction online? Is it mixed or?

Yeah. I mean, I've just been on my TikTok this morning. I had some guy calling me a slapper. Some guy saying that I've got no boundaries. Like, well, what does that even mean? Yeah. Well, yeah, exactly like, because I obviously go on and I do have boundaries because I won't work with anyone. Like I've had people who have disabilities have also been quite abusive towards me, being like, well, I'm disabled, you should do anything for me. And like, as much as I want to help you, like, you can still be respected.

Yeah, of course. And then I have other people that are like, I think what you're doing is amazing. You're really helping people understand that just because they've got a disability, they deserve to live a spicy lifestyle. Yeah. And I've definitely learned that people with disabilities are very, very kinky. and very spicy. It's like it's that conversation, isn't it, that people don't have? Like, because people have a disability, you automatically think that they're not allowed

those kind of the same sexual pleasures or interests that the rest of us have. And they're viewed different because of that disability, which is totally unfair. Totally. Totally. So, like, just because you might have a leg missing doesn't mean that you don't think about, having a juicy time with yourself or with someone else. Exactly. What kind of feedback? do you get after the sessions?

Oh, I like just the best feedback ever. Like, I went to see one of my clients yesterday. And, yeah, he's actually non-verbal. So his carers actually reached out to me and said that they've tried to see other sex workers, but it just didn't work out. And yeah, they're just so much happier and smilinger. And, like, even if they're in a sort of wheelchair

and their bodies don't let them sort of sit back and put their shoulders back, I can just see them change. they're just like, oh, I just feel so much better that somebody sees me as me and doesn't see my disability. Yeah. Yeah. It's just magical. Yeah. That's amazing.

Magical. I think also, like, to touch on some of the discourse that's also surrounded people with disabilities, a lot of the time they're on benefits. And I think sometimes we see in the comments, like, because they're in benefits, they shouldn't be allowed to spend that money on things like this. Which, I mean, we think it's crazy. Because you're on benefits, why should that limit your access to what you want to do of your life? Exactly, exactly, exactly And like, sex is a human need Like we all came because our mum and dad had sex

I can't wrap my head around it And we're allowed to enjoy it You don't have to have sex to have babies Like it's fun, it's juicy, it's interesting It can be really silly You can dress up and play And yeah, like it's their money You can spend whatever they want to spend it on

And if they want to have like a fun time Or if they want to get spanked Or if they just do anything and then they're allowed to do whatever they want with that money. You spoke on one of your TikToks about getting quite emotional after a session with someone with the disability. And like some of the people that you speak to, maybe they haven't been touched in like 10 years. And I think that's another massive thing. Like there's the intimacy side of it, but you're obviously in body work and there's just basic physical touch, like a hug.

Like how do you draw the line between knowing if someone needs a therapist or an intimacy expert? That's a good question. I have had one client who I went to meet him and he, bless him, he was blind. And as soon as I walked in, well, actually, I walked in, we had a cup of tea and he played the accordion for ages. He was amazing at it.

Because, obviously, yeah, because he is blind, he has to feel everything. And he, oh my God, he was amazing. But then we got into the bedroom and he just, like, gripped me and started crying. I was just like, I breathe. breathe, breathe. I don't want him to know that I'm crying. I'm with him. And yeah, oh God, I've really, really felt him. And then afterwards, like, messages got a bit weird.

Oh, no. He was constantly messaging me and he started telling me stories about his life that just didn't add up. And so when things like that start, I'm like, right, you definitely need a therapist or a counselor or something like that. So if messages or emails, start getting a bit weird and I just have to use my intuition for that I'm like we are not a good fit yeah yeah he needs to go and speak someone go see them for about a year and then come back to me and we can chat then um so that's how I try and work it as sometimes like I yeah I walk in and I'm like I'm not the person for you right now you need to go to speak to see a therapist and I try to be more honest about that yeah it was hard at the beginning but now I try and I've like my boundaries

open I mean what other boundaries do you have because you've touched on those kind of ones but you've also mentioned where you felt unsafe. What how, what boundaries do you have to kind of use to protect your own space? Do you know the first thing that just came to my head then was like one of my boundaries is no anal? I mean it's a fair boundary. I think most of us have that. That's literally the first thing that came to my head.

I just have to like putting boundaries like in regards to sort of like deposits and stuff. I have to say like you have to book a you have to pay a deposit first. Otherwise we're not doing it because I have so many time. wasters and then at the beginning I was very much like yeah I'll see anyone and everyone and to understand it was my partner at the time was like you can't see anyone and everyone because they will just use you basically so then I'd say like really discern who has been respectful who just saw me as like an object and a piece of meat and like I say people with disabilities have also been like that towards me

and so I basically just had to say like I we can't yeah we can't work together and then I usually just block them I think that's the fairest and easiest boundary to put in place. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I was just like, adios. Are there any like kinks that you drew a line out or that you wouldn't do or perhaps, you know, you just think I can't help there?

Well, obviously, hard sports. An anal, you've said. An anal. Well, it sort of depends with the anal. The only thing with anal is just like, I have to prep a lot. So I'm like, if you want that, you're going to have to pay more. because there's so much that goes into it before and I'm afterwards. I did have one guy who had a disability bless him

and he'd never had sex before and he was like, I just want to do everything. I want to do front, back, mouth, everywhere, everything. And I was like, whore, all right? You have to have a look at his age. And so I was like, well, it will be extra and he was like, it's fine, I don't care. I just want to go for the full hog.

and he was actually in a hoist and he used a hoist and I'd never used a hoist before so he had to show me how to use a hoist and I was just like luckily everything went fine I mean it's not there's other things that haven't gone fine

and he just showed me everything but I was just like I just get these intrusive thoughts and I'm like just imagine if like the hoist breaks or something and I've just got this guy led there with an erection like what do you even do but yeah no he was lovely and yeah had to do the whole

prep before and after and I don't think he was actually that interested afterwards I was like do you like it and he was like yeah it's all right oh it's just what you want to hear I was like I've done so much proof so yeah boundaries I mean I'm very much person that's like I'll try anything twice so

just give it a go and if I don't like it I don't like it yeah is there anything that you think the public or I don't that average person might not know about intimacy with a person with disability. People just see their disability before they see them. They don't see a human being. Like I had one client who had a severe cerebral palsy.

He could walk, but I went to meet him at the tube station and walked with him to where I was staying and the amount of looks that we got were unbelievable. And I was like, oh, I feel really self-conscious right now. I don't know if it's, because I was how he was walking. Lovely, lovely guy, just a normal person. Like you and me, like lives in a normal house, has a normal job. But, yeah, just the stairs, I was like, oh.

And I know I get stared a lot because of my tattoos, but I was like, I don't know if I could handle that being stared at to that level. And he was amazing. He was like, I just keep going. I just keep trying and I just keep going. And I'm just a normal person like everybody else. my body just doesn't work the same as you and me. Doesn't mean that, yeah, I don't want sex.

Yeah, 100% a good time. Yeah. You've also, so you've touched on, like, some of the people you've helped. So there's any that experiences for you that you felt were really rewarding or that you felt like you really helped people? Yeah, I guess all of them just because they message me afterwards and they're like, you've literally brightened my whole life. Like, you've, like, given me purpose now.

God, I've had so many people that are like, I'm suicidal. And I'm like, oh, can't breathe. That's a lot of responsibility for you to carry into a... I've just realised that. Oh, yeah. Yeah, just, I mean, the fact that they keep, like, rebooking me and that they want to see me again. And, yeah, I just have messages of people, like,

please keep talking about, like, for us. Because people with disabilities don't, are not listened to. At all. As all. And it really does break my heart. So that's why I'm just like I'm trying to talk about it as much as possible, put it on social media, even though social media do not like it. Yeah. What kind of things do they say?

I mean, I get my account deleted nonstop. Really? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because I don't even like, I think even the word disability is sort of like flagged to a degree because I know that there can be a really negative sort of aspects to it. But I'm trying really hard to bring like positivity to it. Yeah, and just obviously, I mean, I just get flagged a hell of a lot. And then people on social media just think I'm sort of monetising this niche. And like my intentions behind it are to help people.

I want everyone to understand that you can have a spicy lifestyle. If, yeah, your body just looks a bit different or if you walk a bit different or if you're in a wheelchair or, yeah, whatever. Do you have mainly male clients? Do you mean disabled or abled? Disabled. Disabled? mainly yes

I do have females reach out to me but they get too scared yeah what do you think that is I think one as a woman they're like we're not supposed to see a sex worker

and then a lot of them are confused because they're like am I meant to like women if I find this woman attractive is that weird am I wrong and then it completely depends on their disability like if they're sort of like autistic that might stop them

I did a phone woman. She, I didn't meet her, but she was just like, I just want you to lick me out and make me scream as much as possible. I was like, I will try my heart as like, how long do you want? She was like 15 minutes. Oh my Christ, I got cramp in my time. I just said, I can't do that in 15 minutes. Oh, my life.

It takes 15 minutes for you to like, come in. Like, I have a cup of tea. You know what I mean? Like, I'm really accommodating. I'm like, do you want to drink, do you know, You need a shower? And I'm like, that can save 15 minutes too. So I just said, I can't.

As much as I would love to be able to do that. Yeah. I'm not a miracle. Especially if you want to be screaming. I was like, that's so much pressure. And I might be really bad at it. I don't know. So yeah, no, pretty much all men.

Do you think that needs to be something that's spoken a bit more within women that are disabled, feeling they should want to be empowered or maybe there isn't the education there or resources shown to them that they can. As a woman, I've been brought up to like men. Women with disabilities have also been brought up the same. I obviously don't know because I don't know there. Imagine that most of society is taught that, you know, that you're supposed to be straight.

Exactly, yeah. And so when I'm like, oh, I'm into anybody, anybody, as long as you're a decent human being and you're respectful, I think they're a bit like, oh, I'm allowed to like a woman. I would like to experience this. And again, if a woman is disabled, like, is another woman going to want to go near them, basically? And so I think they feel like, oh, well, she's not going to find me attractive. So I'm not even going to try.

I don't know how to try. What do I do? And then they just end up pretty lonely, actually. Oh. Really sad. Do people with disabilities that use you, do they kind of express an end goal of maybe being in a relationship or just kind of internally accepting that this might just be. be the way their relationship with intimacy is going to pan out.

No, they all want to be in a relationship. Yeah. They all want, they want children. They want a family life. They want to get up and make a cup of coffee with their partner and go sit out in the garden and, yeah, they all really want to have a relationship. And as much, I would love to help them. I would love to set up a dating app for them.

But it's a mainstream dating app. Yeah. You can only use this if you've got disability. Yeah. They just want a normal. lifestyle. Is there anything like you would like to say to maybe people that are watching that maybe have contrasting opinions or? I think it's more about judgment and like you don't know what these people are going through. I don't know what these people are going through. Like we will,

I will never understand what it's like to be a person with a disability. As much as I try to obviously empathise and I see more of their life than most people do. I guess basically just keep your opinions to yourself. Yeah. Yeah. No. No one knows what's going on in someone else's life and we all want to be in a relationship. We all want touch. It's like literally like a human need. It's what our bodies thrive off. Just because like I keep saying they're disabled doesn't mean that they don't want it as well.

If anything, they want it more because they've never had it or they've been to hospital appointments where they're prodded constantly and they're just seen as a piece of meat to make better. They're not seen as a full on human being who just, who needs a. a hug and most of my clients have only ever had a hug off their parents and they're like I want a hug off another person that's not my mum. Well outside of work of people with disabilities you also work with couples and also women and I I'm just very intrigued from a standpoint of you do work within like trauma healing and like like using sex as a way of healing rather than like maybe truly focusing on like the

pleasure size of things what does that look like for you? what would you do with a client that needs to be healed sexually? Yeah, I mean, obviously it all depends on what they're wanting and what they're needing. But it can, it can like range from like teaching women, but I'm men and couples on how to give pleasure. A lot of people don't know how to give pleasure. Selfish. Yeah. Yeah.

Exactly. Exactly. And I have had, I'm going to say men, I have had some men, I have said to some men like, don't want to teach you a few things while she's down there to sort of like help you? And they're like, no, I'm fine. I know what I'm doing. Try again. But yeah, just to help them also receive a lot of people, we're all people pleases and we'll want to help as many people as we can and people find it really hard to receive.

So I help them, like we'll do some like breathing or some meditation, some nervous system regulation for them to calm down because they're usually really nervous. And yeah, just again, for them to just lie back and for them to receive and they found it really hard. They're like, oh, I feel like I should be touching you and doing something. I'm like, you don't have to. And literally, this is a beautiful ceremony for you. Just lie back and enjoy. Like you don't have to give me anything.

And do you just host that at your own or do you have like, just at your house? Yeah, just in my house. In my dungeon boudoir. The time of dungeon. So yeah, me and my partner, we, yeah, just painted the room black. as you do and then it looked like a bit of a cave so we had to paint reprint some walls white they looked a bit like dingy

dungeons and dragons yeah I've just got all my on my toys and my tools on the wall and paddles and floggers and rope I've got a pole for pole dancing and yeah then my dildos and

whatever spreaders but yeah no I do it at my house and I also go to people's places if they've got disabilities they can't come to me, then I will try my hardest to get to them. With couples, do you often see a contrast between the man who can often find it quite easy to get turned on? And then for a woman, she's like, well, it takes a little bit more foreplay, but then the foreplay can sometimes look like doing the dishes earlier on of the day or doing acts of

service and like having a lead up. That's kind of seen as like the turning on of sorts. Do you see that kind of thing in the bedroom that it's not as like a mismatch level? libidoes kind of thing. Yes, I've had experiences of sort of like of everything really. I had one couple where the guy really struggled and the girl was like, I'm fucking ready giving it to me like, come on, let's do this. And then I've had it with another couple who, um, she was really nervous. And so he was like, this is basically for her. Like she wanted to explore being with a woman. So I'm just going to sit back, I think of England and just sit back and watch sort of thing,

whilst you two do whatever you need to do. So that just really helped her calm down and for our bodies to get used to each other because there's so much that goes on in our bodies. And I'm also really nervous still meeting new people. Because even though I have like massive conversations with people, I still don't know what I'm walking into. So I could be walking into a very, very scary situation.

But yes, so that one, she just needed about half an hour to just calm down and kiss a woman for the first time. and kiss a female body for the first time and then she was like yeah I'm rearing to go now let's go for it and then he came in and we had a wonderful time so yeah I see it all like yeah completely

yeah completely different and then the other guy it took him a long time so to get hard and a long time to ejaculate I think it was the pressure of me and her sort of watching being like oh I'm going all day yeah those time restraints

might be causing some serious issues exactly yeah do you think that intimacy should be considered part of human care. Totally. Totally, totally, totally. I am actually going to be creating a school to help sex workers, sexologists, practitioners, facilitators, even like a yoga teacher on how to work with people with disabilities.

That's amazing. I'm going to be creating sex toys for people with disabilities because there are sex toys out right now, but they're so ugly. And they cost about a thousand pound. It's mental. Really? Yeah. That's monetizing off of people with disabilities.

Exactly. Yeah. So what does a sex toy for someone with a disability look like? There is something called a 30 care, which is a massive vibrator, and it literally looks like the old phones, you know, like a brick. Yeah. And it's, oh, God, it's so ugly and clinical and sounds horrendous. Oh, no.

And so people, so I've got a client who's got a spinal cord injury, and he can't feel anything, he can't feel anything from the nipples down. He's, yeah, he had a snowboard in accident, and he's, um, nothing works, basically. he's just let in bed like 24-7. He uses this 30-K because it is so strong on his penis. But it, oh God, it's so,

I can't explain how ugly it is. It's disgusting. And it's not sexy or spicy or juicy. And so I do want to make, yeah, toys that are all more accessible and more flirty and more fun and like a very strong. Like, because my vibrator did nothing on him.

He was like, I can't feel that. But it's 30 care because it's so powerful. powerful it can. And I know there are a few out there, but I would like to make sex toys like for every sort of disability. But yeah, just bring more awareness to this world and to help people understand that there's nothing to be ashamed of. There's nothing to be embarrassed about. Whether you're able-bodied or disabled body like sex is absolutely beautiful, sensuality, intimacy. Yeah. And we get to have more of these conversations, no matter what your gender or sexuality is.

That's beautiful. I love that. And where can everyone find you online? So if I'm not being deleted. Instagram, I think my Instagram is like Sorora Soul, but then spicy sororah is my sort of like main thing. So that's like TikTok.

I've got my spicy sororah. Website. I've got a few websites. Yeah, they're usually the main ones. But I think if you just put my name in Google, it'll come up. So. Michael Nick.

Yeah. Love it. Well, thank you so much for coming on. Yes, thank you. Thank you. Thank you guys. It's amazing.