TED Talks Daily - Why great leaders take humor seriously | Jennifer Aaker and Naomi Bagdonas

Episode Date: April 12, 2024

There's a mistaken belief in today's working world that leaders need to be serious all the time to be taken seriously. The research tells a different story. Based on the course they teach at Stanford's Graduate School of Business, behavioral scientist Jennifer Aaker and corporate strategist Naomi Bagdonas delve into the surprising power of humor: why it's a secret weapon to build bonds, power, creativity and resilience -- and how we can all have more of it.

TED Audio Collective. You're listening to TED Talks Daily. I'm your host, Elise Hu. Jokes are always more funny when you have to explain the joke, right? No? Okay, well, today's archive talk from Ted Monterey in 2021 isn't going to unpack why certain jokes are funny because that wouldn't be funny.

Instead, behavioral scientist Jennifer Aker and corporate strategist Naomi Bagdonas give us a talk together, peppered with humor, to make a point about why humor is so effective in business and in life. Get ready to chuckle along with them after the break. Support for this show comes from Airbnb. Get ready to chuckle along with them after the break. I pictured my own home sitting empty. Wouldn't it be smart and better put to use welcoming a family like mine by hosting it on Airbnb? It feels like the practical thing to do.

And with the extra income, I could save up for renovations to make the space even more inviting for ourselves and for future guests. Your home might be worth more than you think. Find out how much at Airbnbbnb.ca slash host. sees John Stackhouse and Sonia Sinek from Creative Destruction Lab as they ask bold questions like, why is Canada lagging in AI adoption and how to catch up? Don't get left behind. Listen to Disruptors, the innovation era, and stay ahead of the game in this fast-changing world. Follow Disruptors on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or your favorite podcast platform. All right, so how often do you laugh at work? I mean, really laugh. We asked some of you this question, and here's what we heard.

Rarely. Seldomly. And then our personal favorite. I study climate change. Why would I laugh? The two of us teach a class at Stanford Business School about the power of humor in leadership. Turns out that humor is a teachable skill

and one of the most underappreciated assets at work. For the record, our class on humor gets the same academic credit as financial accounting. Which is not a joke. Right. Here's the problem, though. We've all fallen off a humor cliff. In a global study, over a million people were asked a simple question.

Did you smile or laugh a lot yesterday? When we were kids, the answer is yes. Then, right when we enter the workforce, the answer becomes no. The good news is things look up again around 80. The bad news is the average life expectancy is 78. So, it's not good. It's not great. I'm a behavioral scientist who spent my career studying what actually creates happiness in life

versus what we think. And I'm a corporate strategist who spent my career straddling the worlds of business and improv comedy, which was a wide straddle. The two of us are on a mission to bring humor back. Over the last decade, we've gathered data, partnered with comedians, and talked to leaders about humor. One of them was our friend, Conor Diemen-Yeoman.

Conor is the co-CEO of a large nonprofit, and in early 2020, just weeks after the world went into quarantine, he's leading his first virtual off-site with his entire organization. People are exhausted and scared. It's tense. So Conor shares a few slides before passing to another teammate

to speak. But when he does, he intentionally leaves his screen share on. So his entire organization watches, thinking that this is a terrible mistake, as Connor closes his PowerPoint, opens up a Google search, and types in things inspirational CEOs say during hard times. Everyone laughs. It's this beautiful moment of levity, and it has real upside for Connor and for his organization, because we know from the research that leaders with a good sense of humor are seen as 27% more motivating. Their teams are more bonded and creative. Also, humor sells.

Studies show that adding a lighthearted line into a sales pitch, like, my final offer is X, and I'll throw in my pet frog, makes people willing to pay nearly 20 percent more. Really let it sink in, just how bad that joke is. I'll throw in my pet frog. The bar is so low. It's extreme. It's like very low. It could not be lower. Laughter shortens the path to connection as well. So when strangers share a laugh before a conversation, they end up disclosing more personal information.

So they feel closer. You really laughed hard at that pet frog line. I already feel close to you. Don't we feel close? Wow. Yeah, we feel close. There's a lot there. Okay, so what's happening is when we laugh, our brains release a cocktail of hormones. So we release endorphins, giving us a similar feeling to a runner's high. We lower our cortisol, making us feel calmer. So we release endorphins, giving us a similar feeling to a runner's high. We lower our cortisol, making us feel calmer. And we release dopamine, the same hormone released during sex, making us feel more bonded.

So in essence, as far as our brains are concerned, laughing is like exercising, meditating and having sex at the same time. But logistically easier. Also efficient. It's efficient. Yes. There's a lot to it. All right. So humor works. And the really good news that we want to talk about today is that our lives are full of humor if we know how to look for it. Here's the secret. Don't look for what's funny. Just notice what's true. We asked some of you what's true in your own lives, and here's a few things we heard.

Since working from home, I only comb the front part of my hair. I only like my own kids. There, I said it. So this is not about becoming a comedian. This is about looking at the world in a different way. There's a psychological principle called the priming effect that says our brains are wired to see what we've been set up to expect. In essence, we find what we choose to look for. So when we live our lives on the precipice of a smile, we shift how we interact with the world and in turn how it interacts back. It's also about being human, which should be easy because we are human.

But at work, it's oftentimes harder than we think. In a recent survey, people were asked what traits inspire trust in a leader. One of the top responses speaks like a regular person. When work gets serious and life gets busy, we become transactional. And yet these small shifts are enough to move us from transactional to human. As small as a single word. Like how we often sign off our emails. Best. What does best even mean? Are you the best?

Am I the best? Why do I need to tell you that? We can do better than best. Instead, how about when you've been up all night? You're as heavily caffeinated. When you're talking about financial accounting, let's never speak of this again. And on rare occasion, I'm the best. Sometimes you just got to let people know. Now, it's easy to believe that if we take our lives or our mission seriously, the presence of humor betrays that mission, that gravity and levity are somehow at odds. But our research tells

a different story. We met with Secretary of State Madeleine Albright, who told us the time where the Russian government had bugged the U.S. State Department, a serious breach in international diplomacy. After learning about the bugging, Secretary Albright went to her next meeting with the Russian foreign minister wearing a bug pen, an enormous bug pen. She shared how the foreign minister couldn't help but smile, and she also shared how the energy in the room shifted and it changed the conversation entirely. This story illuminates at least two things that are true.

First, that humor is a choice, one we make in small moments and in big ones, too. And second, that the balance of gravity and levity gives power to both. We can do serious things without taking ourselves so seriously. And in fact, often we can do them better. Now, we often hear that humor can be so tricky these days, and it's true. Comedians know this, which is why they can practice hundreds of times

before a line makes it into one of their sets. They also get to wear jeans and drink whiskey at work. It's all very unfair. So how can we, as normal, non-comedian people, and their mind makes it into one of their sets. They also get to wear jeans and drink whiskey at work. It's all very unfair. So how can we, as normal, non-comedian people, practice safe sets? Start by recognizing it's not about you. So don't ask, will this make me sound funny?

Instead, ask, how will this make other people feel? Which also means never punching down, that is, making fun of someone of lower status. And be sure to check your distance. How close are you personally to what you're making light of? I can make fun of my mother, but not your mother. Our hope today is that you start climbing back up the humor cliff. Start with what's true and start small.

Choose to live on the precipice of a smile. When we do, we create teams, communities and families where joy and laughter come more easily. Laughing together makes us feel more connected. It floods our brains with the same hormones associated with love. And who doesn't want to feel more joy and love in our lives? Where humor exists, love is not far behind. And if that doesn't sell you on the power of humor,

I will throw in my pet frog. Thank you. Thank you so much. Looking for a fun challenge to share with your friends and family? TED now has games designed to keep your mind sharp while having fun. Visit TED.com slash games to explore the joy and wonder of TED Games.