Tell Em Steve-Dave - #331: Is there a Doctor in the house?

Episode Date: April 7, 2017

Bry's brother Erik, a fancy pants doctor, offers up some psychological breakdowns. Music: Scott E. Wells - Damn Near Twenty

You were the first one that's like hey man where it's hurt dude We're a turret dude. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, he meant space sailing. It's not a legal alien's ring. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Another guest, a scholarly guest. Some might say the shining jewel and the crown that is the Johnson family. In fact, probably everybody would say, I don't know what anybody would say. My brother, Eric, what do we call him?

Dr. Johnson, Mr. Yeah, Dr. Jay, Mr. Fuckin' Cool. Mr. Oh, I went to college. I look at me. Does your mother favor you? Does she talk about you the most? I think to some people, but I don't know. To do with folk. You know, it really depends.

She talks to drug counselors a lot about me. You're the first one she mentions. I would have, I mean, it would be understandable. Well, my mom was, she's, uh, she's a nurse. So there's something about becoming a doctor in that whole world of medicine, I think that I never thought about it. Is that the reason you did it just to like one up her? Yeah. Yeah. I was trying to put her in her place. Now, not at all. I mean, I never even thought about it. So I was older. So what doctor? Yeah.

What do you have a doctor of? So I'm a DO, so I'm an osteopathic doctor. That's like kind of the de-rated, not more in kidding. Oh, really? So there's two even in the past? No, you can get an MD or a DO, and you can have a full medical license. So I'm a psychiatrist. You're a psychiatrist.

Yeah, he's going to break it down for me. And it's my third year residency. Did you do your thesis on your brother? Did you? That was that year. I don't have to do papers, but yeah, we definitely could do I mean it doesn't have to stop at him it could be about genetics and mental illness in my family Yeah, just like like going all the way back to the Stone Age and shit Primordial Johnson that's like I don't fuck I hate myself

Zoin Johnson idiot like, oh fuck, I hate myself. Prozoan Johnson, idiot. Yeah, I mean, he's the only one really out of the four, you know, the brother Darren, he's younger than Eric, sister, Tracy, who's between me and Eric. And he's really, you're really the only one who, well, you're the only one who went to college in any kind of real way, graduated college, and then had like some sort of goal, which was to leave the house. I guess, yeah. What, what, how much did you know you want to be a doctor?

Well, I guess I didn't even think about it at all until I was probably about 23, 24, so after college, and then I went back to college. Yeah, like he went, okay, so you went to Rutgers, then you then you moved to San Francisco, which was highly suspect. He told the whole Johnson family go like, uh-oh. He was like blacklisted for, for, for years. He brought a girl with him just to make it seem like, you know, oh. Yeah, when I was in San Francisco, I worked at a free medical clinic. And then I met people that were becoming doctors, and they didn't really seem that smart.

So I was like, I could probably do this. That sounds like a John. That sounds like a John. That sounds like Darren. Oh, they're good enough. That's right. Everybody is bettering up. Everybody like a Terminator. Does this person pose a threat? Am I better than this person? Of course, I'm better than this person. Why am I even asking my Terminator self this question?

No, I mean, it just seemed so like you... asking my terminator self this question. I mean, it just seems so like you I don't know to me, it just seemed on obtainable when I was a kid like are you have to be like get straight A's all through high school, you can't ever mess up in life, you can never so I did pretty well. Yeah, I almost got straight A's probably, but Yeah, I almost got straight A's probably but But in college I didn't my first degree I didn't really do that great. I mean I probably got like a 3.5 or something it wasn't what a dummy Yeah, I know I've heard

I've heard on several episodes. Something we haven't talked about in quite some time. I mean, I mean, 10 minutes. We've got a couple episodes and I've mentioned in my IQ. I mean, it's a point of doing this podcast if we're not going to talk about it. Who's got the bigger Johnson? I mean, yeah. I've never had my IQ measured. Actually, I've never. You've measured. Actually, I've never.

You've never had it, you've never got it measured, huh? You know who says it? People don't want to reveal that they're like average. Yeah. Yeah. People that didn't have to see psychologists in high school. Yeah.

I mean, you think about it. Like, everybody that like every generation that came that comes after the one before, is that an advantage? Like I remember, like barely remember talk of riddling when I was young and panicking like, no, he's not going on medicine. He's not putting him on medication, which may have been helpful at the time, you know?

To about me? No, me. Oh. Yeah. But then like, it's just become more acceptable, well, to the point where it's overprescribed, but it's become more acceptable to be like, okay, well, this is not just somebody being bad or defiant or whatever. Like, maybe they actually have a hard time paying attention.

I'm a victim is what I'm trying to say, right? Yeah, I wouldn't prescribe you a riddle on. As a kid, that was a doctor. No, I need it. Why don't take Rivalin? I take out a role. Yeah, I should probably say that I'm not giving out medical advice either. Two to your audience. But yeah, otherwise maybe you get sued.

People, people, people threaten to sue them all the time, you said. Well, I don't understand that. I don't understand that. Steven, you're going in very defensively. Well, do you think that you're going to be... She's coming in hot. No, I don't want to, because sometimes people say, oh, but I heard on this and then that guy said that or, you know, like...

So you're saying what you're saying, take everything you say as a, not as you... It's not meant to go see your own not as you go see your own doctor. Exactly. More ask for. More ask for. I tell you, man, I think the majority of the audience of Tom Steve Dave listeners are mentally unstable in one way or another. I love them. That another? I love them.

That's why I love them. They're dealing with some baggage, I think. A lot of them. Which is a headscratcher. It's always amazes me. Every email I get kind of brings that up. They're dealing with some stuff. So is podcast, because I've heard this many times, have you ever prescribed a podcast?

Because I was prescribed a podcast. Yeah, I was prescribed a 12 Steve Dave. Like, I mean, okay, where do I get this film? I'll just go hide to it. I'm so sorry. You're trying. I'm telling you, I'm telling you right now, I could bring up 100 emails in this month of like what your podcast helps me do this and it makes me calm, it makes me down, deals

with stress, yada yada, a lot of like people say it's the prescription that gets them through the week. Is it possible to prescribe a podcast? Yeah, of course. I mean, I prescribe other educational materials, so I guess the podcast. Would you? So it sounds like you listen from time to time.

I've listened to everything up until 307. Oh, see, oh my God, so you listen. Oh, all right. I got to use my in last three. Oh, so you're not the first doctor, I got his mind last. Oh, so you are You're you're not the first doctor. I think the people you're like maybe be the most like you would be like on a plane If it was going down like we have a doctor Frank five, right? He would not be the doctor you'd be the doctor to I thought he was a professor is he a doctor? I thought is the professor. Oh, is it? Yeah

Well, so you would be the guy like a broken armoring thing. You'd be the guy. We wouldn't want all Frank five in his Philosophies. I mean, hopefully there's an emergency room doctor Not just a psychiatry Yeah, you're gonna find this to be traumatic, but I can't help you You're gonna have to deal with it once you hit the ground What we're talking about? Yeah, so, okay, so nothing you say should be taken with. You know what? I did the Rob Bruce's

horror con this week and a couple people, same thing came up to me. Like, not even like easing into it. Like, I love your podcast. Like. I was going to kill myself. I just started listening. What do you think about that when people say that? They're literally, they're just, they were trying to find something else to save their life if it wasn't Tom Steve Dave, though. Obviously, they're just, they're looking for something and this helps, which is great, but They're just they're looking for something and and this helps which is great, but

Come on, I mean you it's nice. It's nice But don't ever like sit there and think that they wouldn't have found something else that would have But helped You know take away the you know take away put their mind on something else to take away there I don't know man. I recently I was thinking me and Q should start going by father son and holy ghost I recently I was thinking me and Q should start going by father, son and holy ghost Like we're like beside us, you know, saving people. There might be a little bit of like group therapy aspect or something I think it's relatable. I think when you talk about stuff that that like in your own life that people are like, oh well

I you know, I thought I was the only one who felt that way or I didn't really know how to, I don't know, yeah, like there's a sense of community, right? Yeah, I mean, yeah, it's the, I mean if you think back to when you guys first started, all started kind of based on your own mental illness. Yeah, because somebody was gonna, I was like, I'm gonna kill myself. And really tell them, Steve, I was, I was patient zero. Really. Yeah, those first couple episodes were. Yeah, a little bit dark.

Oh, it's gotten lighter. Yeah, oh, I think so. That's good. Yeah. But I haven't just say, I haven't seen every episode a comic bookman Well, I definitely haven't seen every episode of Bracknell Joker's Yeah, that's a commitment IJ's like I mean Christy

Well, there's only like yeah, but there's only like what 10ish 10 episodes a year of compokman Yeah, I don't know why I mean well you couldn't yeah, I think it's I think it's like up to 80 Four right now you couldn't sit through 84 episodes of comic book men wrong with you man Do you get any? Do you get any any people that are very impressed? Maybe not so much that you're a doctor, but your brother is a major television celebrity Yeah, they ever run in the people.

Not a, you know, most people don't really know because I don't bring it up. Oh, you don't. Yeah. You don't have a picture of Brian next to your, uh, your, your, what's that thing called? A wolf. A wolf. Yeah. Yeah, he does what it's Brian Quinn.

that they call it on the wall. The diploma. Yeah. Yeah. He does what it's Brian Quinn. It's just. I do have a couple people that I think might be fans of the show that are my patients. They're all like,

because they preach. Yeah. No. Now they're actually a little bit. What kind of, what are your specialty? Is it like extreme? Like do you have a patient that made you shudder? Like that you know, some like those patients that like the psychiatrist dream of that they can write books off of?

Yeah, well psychiatrist wet dream. Yeah, what is, yeah, is there a wet dream for psychiatrist when you're looking for that one like person that's like, you know, like you know, that's like a symbol or something. I don't really think we go out looking for that but I just think like interesting cases like to others like I just get jelly if you know you remember yeah I know yeah it turned was it fraudulent yeah well I mean it was a it was a it was a big cash cowdough for even the doctor would cash in on that. So am I looking for that patient I can write a book about? I thought all doctors like not that they dream about it, but like I mean they want that one case, that challenging case,

that one like you know, that one thing that's like that one patient that they're so fascinated by. I definitely have a group of patients that I'm more interested in. I mean, patients that have other brain diseases, and then they have... I mean, it's not really that interesting, probably to most people, but... But you're like, Garden Variety, like I'm so shit, like depressive, like me come in, you're like... Ah! Yeah, I can't get a little bit. Another one. Another one. I think I've used those exact words.

Actually, it gets pretty exhausted. This is my diagnosis. Ah. Yeah, so I work in a, so I'm a third year resident. So there's four years of residency training after medical school for psychiatry to be finished. And in my third year, I work in for psychiatry to be finished and in my third year I work in community psychiatry and and San Bernardino County which is one of the poorest counties in the country.

It's one of the poorest in California so I work with very very poor people so they're very sick. So you're not like in a high rise like Bob Newhart? Yeah. So they're very so you're not like in a high rise like Bob Newhart Yeah, you never knew Bob Newhart show. He was nothing like that sitting now nothing like that He used to promise my mother he take the train to work every day He didn't he'd have a fill it either no I didn't yeah, I jump red show Yeah, very used to the whole opening was him He'd get his briefcase he kisses with him. He gets his briefcase. He kisses wife goodbye. He go to work. That's all my mom. I was like, I'm gonna do that one day while I'm gonna

go work in a higher rise like that. And I'm gonna take the train to work on a carrier briefcase. And none of that was ever fulfilled. I like to tell you this. This is a spend hours to do this head under his own bed. I don't avoid this sun. Yeah, the city spends hours to do this head under his own bed. He's trying to avoid the sun. Yeah, what's up with a guy like that, right? The sun comes up. You haven't heard this yet, but turned out that like, it gets very sunny in Walt's rooms,

and he doesn't have a curtain or shade in there. So instead of maybe even just turning his back to the sun. Oh, no, he gets on the floor and he puts his head underneath the bed and sleeps for hours, like with his head under the bed. What it would be. That's ingenuity. And this is yours. Is he a genius?

He claims he's a fool. Well, maybe he doesn't want to play a shade. I like to ask this, though. Just face. I'm a little bit of a... I'm a little bit of a... I'm a little bit of a... I'm a little bit of a...

I'm a little bit of a... I'm a little bit of a... I'm a little bit of a... I'm a little bit of a... I'm a little bit of a... I'm a little bit of a... I'm a little bit of a... He doesn't want to play a sheet. I like to ask this though, because it's based on... I'm a Testicrate. Did you sign this paper saying I'm a Testicrate gross? I don't want to get out of there going to cons. Is there a normal person in your experience? Oh, we were just talking about this.

So is that a unicorn? A normal person. I mean, most people are actually normal, right? So in biostatistics, they have what they call the normal curve. And so most people fall, it's a bell shaped curve and most people fall into that center. So you're only interested in to five percent of that.

I'm not a bell and you don't want to say that. Well, because in the UK that means something totally different. I mean, if you're, I don't know if it's as sexy as the lunatic, the patient who finds, you know, the doctor who finds the lunatic patient, I mean, you don't know if it's as sexy as the lunatic, the patient who finds, you know, the doctor who finds the lunatic patient, I mean, you know, writes some forth, but you could find that the most normal person is sitting right in front of you, I think. Not Brian.

Now you just heard me talking about him sleeping with his head under the bed. That's just because I'm just tired. And I'm like, you know, I'm just so tired. I'm like, oh, it's in my eyes. I roll over onto the floor, grab my pillow on blanket and just stick my head under the bed, because it's dark and cool.

I mean, I'm less worried about you than, you know, the other members of Tellum's State Daily. So, it's a good turn to about you. Yeah, sometimes I worry about him as well. Really, he seems as happy as I've ever heard him lately. Yeah, sometimes he does, and then sometimes when he calls be he doesn't seem like a brave face no no no I think it's it's like up and down at times yeah sometimes there's just shit that he's like oh I don't want it like I mean like with anybody I guess not

like super depressed or sad or anything but just like irritated too much yeah like too much overwhelmed Overwhelmed? Yeah. Which is understandable. I mean, the guys constantly on the go, and me, pretty norm. Yeah. Not at all.

Yeah, right. I mean, yeah. I mean, you, Darren, I mean, you guys are kind of like textbook bipolar cases. That's what it is. That's what he has. Yeah.

I need you right that tone on a note. And what is the truth? Absolutely. Yeah, man. So I mean, the treatment for bipolar disorder is you use a mood stabilizer. That's the most important medication you would take. Something to keep your mood from kind of cycling too high or too low. So that kind of drive you get.

It can be good. I mean, it can push you to do new things. It can push you to, you know, right, it can push you to go to school. But that's what it can be called like hypomania and then full mania is something totally different where you don't sleep at all. I gotta go, I'm gonna go sign up to college. Exactly. In calls of decision making, those types of things, but then it's usually followed by,

and more commonly, the person's like severely depressed and they don't want to do anything, they don't want to do anything. They don't respond to emails. They're brothers phone calls. They're brothers phone calls. Yeah. Yeah. And so, you know, so that's a. So who's fault is it?

Pems or editors? Or both. I mean, it's actually probably both their faults. Thinking about it's highly genetic, but it's also bipolar disorder has heavy genetic component and so they should have never Got together and did the deed then was they were right that was like that was a It was a concoction Or that was but it was going to a recipe for disaster.'s like, you're going to burst in on them later on.

I'm like, why did you fall? Is there, like, people who have certain, they have, like, some issues that should not be get together and have children? I mean, like kind of like sickle cell disease where you go see a genetic counselor to see if your child might end up with sickle cell. That sounds racist to me. Well, they're only black people get sickle cell. Well, but racist in the family.

But it's actually, you know, it's actually beneficial in some places in the world where there's malaria and not beneficial in other places. So you're saying if you're getting ready, is this started family or get married? Before you can get married, you should take a psychiatric evaluation. Like genetic counseling. Or something. Just to see if you're like, if this is the person, both like if you guys have a child, it might have some, it might have to be at high risk. You know, it wouldn't be a bad idea because mental illness is more disabling than physical illness.

Can you imagine that though if that became like that? That's the sticking point. Like, your, like the girl you proposed to is like, all right, but first we got to go to this genetic counselor to see how fucked up you are exactly It's too fucked up Why wait why are you telling it why are you assuming it's going to be her though? What her saying this to me? You're gonna be saying it to her. I mean wouldn't you mean she's gonna say it to her

Yeah, but she might be like She might be thinking tell me what about if you get your results though in front of her. Oh yeah that's a good point. All right nobody needs to know anything. I just roll the dice baby. We're in love. It was the worst second happened. It ends up like me. I mean you can't actually do that right now. There's no genetic, like, there's no solid genetic markers for bipolar disease are mental illness. There are genetic traits, but right now, but you may be in the future. You should be invoicing. I'm gonna make us rich.

I'm not that smart. It's gonna be like a test. There's just gonna be a written test. No, it would be... Do you need a stool sin? Rich I'm not that smart No, it would be you need a stool soon I mean you could see traits or you know what would you be looking for? Look at his eyes, darkness. Why did I agree to this? Why did I agree to this? What specific markers would you look for? And the Mr. and Mr. you know, they're just, they're getting ready to get married. You'd be like, I, you guys can get married.

You guys can have children, but I would recommend not having children because of these things that are showing up on the test. Okay. Well, I mean, realistically, I wouldn't say that based on a scientific test, but if two people came to me and... Can you believe what that guy does say? He's a fucking doctor. He wrote, tell him Steve David, I'll prescribe him right now.

Told us to go our separate ways. I would get a, I would get a, what's the cold, I would get your tubes tied right now if I were you, ma'am. And you, I would, I would definitely, I would get, what's the cold when you get your snipped? Oh, the, um, the sector, you have a sector, do you know how to do a sector means? Because you could double up on the cash, right? It's actually the, sterilization by Johnson's. Yeah, straight up. It's actually the issue. Sterilization by Johnson.

Straight up. What would you tell them, though? Your beds don't have any. They come in, they're saying we both know we have mental illness. What you would do is just kind of, I won't forget Mary. Right? We're thinking about getting married.

We both have had some mental issues in the past And Where we're a little concerned if you know, we want to start a family want to have like five or six kids I'm like I'm looking forward to marrying the most normal man on in the world What now? Let's we've submitted to your test This so-called test. Oh, you invented it. I invented it.

You're in Mexico, because you're not allowed to practice. You're not allowed to practice. Staying out there before the wall will fall down the wall and up. Just a little bit of time. That's read our results. Tell us what you, and we both, let's say for the sake of

the argument, we both have mental illness in our history. Okay, so the test would probably say something like, you know, you're your child, if you were to have a child, it would have maybe like a 25% risk of developing like bipolar disorder or another psychotic disorder or something like that. And then you'd have to think, you say, well, if you have six children, you're likely to have maybe one or two that develops veer mental illness, and you might need to care for those children in a different way, then you would the other four children in every other life.

Yeah. Essentially. Yeah. But I mean, there could life. Yeah. Essentially. But I mean, there could be, you could, to test when it becomes available, it'll be able to narrow it down to 25. What are selling your tests? Yeah, I mean, you can, you can look and, I mean, even just without a DNA test, you could pretty much look at a family tree. And if you knew enough about the family,

you could figure out generally what the likelihood of something like that is. You know. We're love conquers all, doctor. You can't measure how much our love is. Yeah. And love conquers all, all problems. We're not problem. We're not paying Now you sound like my patient Yeah, that would be tough right because nobody wants to hear that and who knows like what if like like let's say the wife is like Oh, man, he's right and she's like I don't want to get married I think I think I comes back all crazy and shit like you piece of shit I think I comes back all crazy and shit like piece of shit Now look at highly controversial about that stuff all the time. Yeah, all these theories you're toss it out there man Yeah, a lot of people aren't with it. I don't know if they're theories

I mean your job is just to give people the best advice so they can be prepared for what they you know happens Right, you're not like well says you're not gonna say if they're in love you're not gonna change anybody's mind Yeah, it's like oh you might have a kid that's what if it was like um Like John Wayne gacy and what was that serial serial killer? Oh, I lean born us. Yeah, they both came to like we want to have a child I lean born us yeah, they both We want to have a child John wiggie to the full grease paint

She's got those oil down And they want oh yeah, I need to know the answer. I gotta get to a truck stop. Yeah. He's like, I'm gonna go hang out with Roslyn Carter. I, you know, I would probably try to get them out of the office as quickly as possible. But what's your full step? Yeah. Well, you, what would their, their, their, their, their test would be through the roof, right?

In terms of like it would be like the readings would be off the charts. Yeah. I mean, I would imagine the risk of having an abnormal child would be through the roof, right? In terms of like it would be, like the readings would be off the charts. Yeah, I mean, I would imagine the risk of having an abnormal child would be very high. So, it still gets revived. Yeah. See that has to be the wet dream, right? Like you get the next big serial killer. Like the next like night stalker.

Oh, yeah. The next like. Remirez. Yeah. you know, I actually I'm trying to say I'm patients don't kill me one Everything you cash in though. Yeah, then you get like you go on the talk shows sir Oh, yeah, you could be the next doctor Phil maybe you become like like when I was 24 hour news like you know become the official doctor maybe you become like what like when I was 24 hour news like you know become the official doctor whenever like a serial killer pops up you become the talking head that they call in yeah you're the guy and then like everybody's like oh this guy knows what he's talking

about books you you've you've you've what's it called when you consult on movies I mean you're fucking just raking it in so this isn't gonna propel me to that level of fame. It's tomasty. It's tomasty. Not a two-serial killer. Like you and Bob, two-serial killers to get married. Now, there's that Dr. Patient Coffin and Chelley. So if a guy comes to you and he's like, you know, the serial killer they're looking for, it's me. Then what do you do? So this is kind of interesting because if the crimes have happened in the past, you can encourage the person to report them themselves, but you're under no legal obligation to actually

report them. I believe some people do anyway but it's actually probably a breach of confidentiality the way the laws written but if they said i'm going to go kill this person then you're legally obligated to inform that person and the police so if he sits on the very general like hey i'm i'm the i'm the serial killer right

i'm the uh... who was your guy? oh yeah the brown uh... the brown coll killer, right? I'm the, who was your guy? Oh, yeah, the brown- The brown-collared killer, right? Yeah, the BCK. Yeah, he shits on people's colors. Yeah, he shits. No, I only go after white people who commit white-collar crimes. Okay.

This is my serial killer. If I had to come to serial killer, I'd want it. I'd want it at least off people who are pieces of shit, but I don't want to go about, obviously, if I'm going to come to steer a killer I'd want it I'd want it at least off people who are pieces of shit But I want to go about obviously if I'm gonna have their criminals I got to pick my I got to pick non non dangerous criminals because I'm not a young anymore So I got it way after guys. I was 20 if I got it after guys have couldn't white collar crimes You know like panties Just sipping on a desk old day

Get fat guys are older than me Like Bernie made off I could fucking stuff him out like a fucking candle Oh, you might know she's not I thought if I was the brown collar killer But I'm not have to notify Bernie made off. I mean the plants also supposed to be realistic So is he's in jail, right? So maybe so you so you would be like you'd have to Evaluate like how realistic it is his his threat level. Yeah, okay Right, but if he's like okay, so I'm this serial killer I killed these people and he's like and I'm not gonna stop so it's that general that's not really a plan

But if he's like I got my eye on this this checker this dude or whatever That's is that solid enough that you can report it? I mean, I would. Yeah. I don't know if I would get in trouble for it. But yeah. Trouble from who you're the fraternity? For pre-confinanciality. Why don't you just tell somebody, like, tell somebody else and they can tell the cops. And if there's a reward, you just tell somebody else's pre-confinanciality. That's what you do though, like, if there's a reward, like, you tell me and then I'm like, oh, you know what? And then like I give the tip that leads to the

country. So you can't you can't tell your wife, right? That wow, how how difficult is that? You've got to have like you got some steely resolve not to want to be like come home from what you're like, how would you say it work? And you get something really juicy happen. I'm new heart i can see i mean i could talk about general what happened i could say you know somebody came in and they he's gonna go kill somebody else but i can't tell her that person was but this part in the new heart show he did he told

emily constantly about his patients it's not like that she doesn't really care too much really constantly about his patients. It's not like that. She doesn't really care too much. Really? Well, she'd care about that. Like the stuff you were talking about the other day or yesterday, like, no names or anything is very general stuff.

Like, that sounds interesting to me. I'd want to hear about that. Like, people lighten themselves on fire and like tweakers and all this other shit. Like, you know, like Like I wanna hear those stories. I mean sometimes I tell them about like funny stuff, you know, like I have a guy that won't leave his house cause he's paranoid aliens are gonna try to get him.

So. You wanna hear something that's a riot? I mean it's not really funny to him, but it's kind of like, you know, shutting, have you ever been abducted? I know that he says that's not been a problem, It's kind of like you know, shudden No, that's not been a problem, but So it's just the fear keeps how do you

How do you treat that though? Yeah, he takes a like kind of psychotics But do you tell them do you do you do you flat out say? You don't need to worry about this brother to Arnold aliens are do you so are you keep up the was the facade that like there are aliens that could get you? Yeah, you have to play into it now. You know you know playing to the people's illusions You're like I think I just so long go by the window Oh, but that but that's not that much of a delusion now because you're sitting here selling that there's no chance that we haven't been visited by aliens With all the video you got me there. I mean, because that's condescending. Do you say? Come on, I mean, you're really, there's no, you know what you could say unequivocally. Is that how you say it? Is that right? I want to oppress them.

The doctor. He's good to be. We could like, wow, look at these scholars, these two. But like, there's, let me, you, which is good, I guess you don't. So do you say there's no such thing as aliens? No, I believe there are probably are aliens. Whatever's going to shut them. But I don't think you was visited by them. I mean, the reason you can tell is, you know, you should insistence use of his stories. Yeah.

And it's been there ever since he's come a coveted. Yeah. I mean, you can break down the inconsistencies. You know, sometimes people have delusions that are very, they almost seem real. Like Terminator type stuff. Like the person I was saying that, like, you know, he thought his wife was, he thought he saw an email in his wife was cheating on him

But he was staring at a cell phone that was just turned off and he he told you that he was like a computer program Yeah, he's like a computer programmer. And his wife was like he doesn't know anything about computers And he was he just stares at a cell phone. That's not even turned on. It's not even connected to a service and Things he see in emails about her cheat not him connected to a service and thinks you see an emails about her cheating on them. That's a paranoid shit. That is, but in this day and age, it's probably true. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, man. What did you say to him? Were you like, you're probably right? I'm like, I've got you going.

What do you tell the guy who's thinking that he's scared of aliens? That's when I'm really interested. I mean, how How do you help help him? So my job for a person like that, because most delusions, they're very hard to treat even with medications. So my job is to make sure the delusion doesn't interfere with his functioning so he can be kind of happy in his life, be spent time with his family, and do the things he wants to do to the extent that he can do them. So he can't even, he can't even hold a job right, because he can't leave the house.

He had to quit his job, that guy. Because he was afraid to go into work and get an abducted by aliens? He was afraid to leave the house. Is he made any breakers? I, yeah. Oh, that's good. I mean, so the medication helps him, you know, he has to support a family, you know. So, if you didn't see him for a while,

would you be like, damn, maybe I was wrong. Like maybe he got abducted and I'm the asshole. Or what if he- Or what if he- Or what if you see on the- Or like what if you see on the- Oh, yeah. On Discovery Channel, you see a show that like,

you see some fucking unbelievable footage of some UFOs like this and would that be a trigger for him or that or is it just such a certain thing has to like it's a certain alien I'm not too sure because I don't really like try to talk to him too much about it because it's kind of like disruptive to. So like cheating into it then, right? Yeah. So yeah, have you had him draw what the aliens look like? No. What they're doing, it's really look like. Like would you lose your license if you did that? What other cocks look like do you think?

Would you lose your license if you did that? You're like, what other cox look like do you think? No. It actually takes a quite a lot to lose your license, but yeah, I would have also. So if you asked him just to do a quick sketch, would you be in breach, or would you be in trouble for saying something like that? No, I think that people would probably, like other psychiatrists would be like, there's probably not a good idea, and it doesn't really help him. So you want everything to kind of help the patient.

You don't wanna do things that are funny? Yeah, you think are funny, yeah, exactly. We can bring it all to your own anger, or your own curiosity, you know, that's like, that would be tough though, right? Yeah, that's what I'm saying. You gotta have a steely resolved and not wanna know like, to hear more, that's what I'm saying. You gotta have a steely resolved and not want to know like,

to hear more about that aspect because you want to limit that, you want to have look. Sounds like you want him talking about it as little as possible in your session with him, right? Well, I just want to know, not that I don't want him to talk about it, but I just want to know kind of

how it is impairing his day-to-day functioning. So I can try to figure out how to improve his day-to-day functioning. How long has he had he been fearful of this? Is it just a recent thing? Is it? I think this is about 10 years? This person? Oh, shit, that's a long time.

And like, at what point do you like, well, they didn't get me, so. It just never happened. And then he said, now he met SpaceAlem. He's not a illegal aliens, right? Yeah. Yeah. You know, maybe I actually, I'm gonna fight that. Erick's like, they call them undocumented.

The citizens now illegal aliens. Imagine that. Imagine that was your fuck up. You can't have that. I think was your fuck up. I think I kidnapped myself refugee. Yeah, that you visualize it, right? Cause you'd never really specified. I mean, he might have some grounds to say that I wasn't practicing up to par. Maybe. Yeah. Yeah, it turns out the Ellie's name wasn't Tore it was Jose

we drew the picture it looks like that it looks like the Cheeto bin I thought it was gonna look green and scally this looks like like just a regular guy with a sombrero on What kind of like oh oh shit All right, here's some San Francisco shit for Eric nature box. Mm-hmm go shit for Eric, nature box. Naturebox.com slash TSD 50% off your first order. Now that you live in Southern California, maybe you want to taste of that San Francisco treat. Yeah, yeah, Mr. granola and and what is cute like I forget?

Oh, the black cherry or the white cherry or the. He's all into cherry. Regardless of the color well here it is here yeah i can't really like so yeah he's constantly crying he doesn't get enough like you can't just order it or have his person order it uh... people yeah there's people

put my people in touch with nature box uh... fifty percent of your order, you never get bored, new snacks every month, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Over a hundred to choose from, I think I said that already. No minimum purchase, you can cancel any time. You don't get NatureBox, do you? Get that guy that you're gonna get blue apron? NatureBox, do you mind?

NatureBox, yeah. Yeah. Hook him up with some NatureBox, because that's good for him. They even have to leave the house. Yeah, this guy's never gonna leave the house. He's got a blue apron delivered to him. Plus, he'll live to be 100 though. Yeah, he's like, I wish I had time 50 years ago.

He's in good, he's in healthy. Yeah. Yeah, this is like, this is one of the first guys that I ever knew that was into like all the liberal bullshit Like I do a 10 on the on the liberal scale No, no, no, no And when I lived in San Francisco, I was one of the more conservative people

Live there and I'm pretty liberal for New Jersey, I think There's a pretty, aren't they? We're on the coast. Yeah. Yeah, it's fairly liberal. But San Francisco is totally different. It's part of that conference. It's part of that conference.

It's totally different. Men and unmen. I just heard some crazy. Yeah, they think outside of the different box Yeah, it's a Berkeley bullshit right Set in park benches on fire Gonna stay up for that park bench nobody does Everybody's gonna stand up because now there's no more park

Yeah, but you were the first one that was like like cared about shit that was like, hey, man, don't say fag I'm like show up fat Like really the first guy and then like you know could we grow up in the 70s and 80s and it's like you say fag You don't mean gay guy at all But you were the first one that's like hey man where it's hurt dude man where it's hurt dude. I remember it's using that phrase but yeah. Yeah, you're more liberal than anyone I had ever known. I think it was because I left Highlands and then I went and offended a whole bunch of people at college. I'm really fat.

That's literally what I was doing and then somebody came up to me and was like, KB411? They were like, you should have talked like that. How are you going to sleep, fat? Why can't I talk like that? Words can hurt you. You don't say, all right? You can tell my brother.

Yeah. That was a real eye opener, huh, going to college? Yeah, I was definitely different. brother yeah that was a real I put eye opener huh going to college yeah it was uh definitely different I didn't realize how different uh Highlands was than the rest of the world yeah but this is the guy that was like like you and I'd even drink Pepsi but he was like down on Pepsi he's like yeah man cuz Pepsi does business with Burma who like Oh really? So represses their citizens and I'm like, I can't even have a fucking can of soda now. Look at that.

Yeah. Yeah, but I mean, I still kind of do that. Like I don't shop at certain stores. Yeah, what stores are on your shit list? I don't know if you'll be happy. Oh. Hobby Lobby is one store and I'll shop at because there's big time, uh, Auntie Abortionist.

Hobby Lobby? Yeah. What's up? That's a store? Yeah. Oh. And, uh, I would, I know. Why would I not be happy?

I'm not an anti-abortion. No, but he'll be happy. You should be happy, though, because then it's driving business to you. Oh, yeah. Like anybody who's anti- Hobby Lobby. lobby. Wait a minute, wait a minute. So you thought that I was, I was, um, are you happy? I'm Catholic.

Yeah, I'm not the, I'm not the, uh, the best Catholic. Okay. I can say that. So I'm giving abortion or to anyone who knows you. Yeah. I want to be good. That's a thing though. I want to be better.

Yeah. Yeah, I'm always, I know that I fall so short, but I in terms of abortion Sometimes it's hot topic, but it's sometimes it's it's it's it should be done and other times it should be Other times it's done kind of like on the cuff you know what you know it's like almost like a you know like a birth control yeah yeah but other times you know I understand why some people need to have it done yeah but I'm a hobby lobby why but why are they not allowed to well they had this big thing where they went to the supreme court and they took away the winner loose they

won poppy lobby one yeah they won they won the right to what not and they lost my business To not provide certain health care to their female employees. Are you big arts and craft dude? Did you put a big partner? Hurt in air pocket by nuts chopping air no more the yarn I don't buy my buy-new door. I got you crashed. And my type-leaners are bought elsewhere, Mr. Lobby. Yeah, like why are our share-sicking, they're in the border. Have you ever heard of Michael's Mr. Lobby?

That's right. Where you go? That's it. Oh, so sort of like a pharmacist who's like, hey, man, I don't believe in, I don't believe in abortion, so they won't give them like the morning after pill or whatever. Yeah, that's totally on after pill. That is, that is, that is a dude's greatest enemy.

A fucking cock sucker who won't hand over the morning after pill. All those pharmacists should be fucking beaten, you know? Like beaten where they stand. Yeah, I'm not a... And you're a girl and you're like, Oh, I had one night stand with some fucking schmuck and now I'm gonna fucking have his kid in a way. Right?

Give me that morning after pill. I mean, for a future where you stand. In medicine, in general, you have to work with people that have different value systems and belief systems than yourself, so I don't know why you would go into the medical field if you were. I mean, it just doesn't. It's not appropriate to decline people, care. Do you think it's weird when you see, you know, you're around people of science, and there's still their religious? That's a weird thing, right? Because the two don't really.

because it's you don't really. Yes, sometimes people have beliefs that are completely on scientific, but they're doctors. And so you're like, how do you take all of these science classes and still maintain this really odd belief? Odd belief. Yeah. People are talking about global warming warming, conspiracy stuff like. Uh oh. But you, okay, is global warming completely caused by man? It doesn't necessarily have to be, but it appears that man is a huge factor.

And I think it has the earth has the earth has the earth warmed up and cooled down while with long before man was ever on the face of the planet I believe that is true yeah so a man wasn't there wasn't the reason it happened before man was around so why are we the reason now well man is I mean I think that we are trying to do a separate man from nature, man is actually part in nature, so everything we do is kind of part of the earth, right? So, I mean, we're, all right, but before the fact that we're using aerosol cans, the earth was warming up. Well, we're causing it on, you can't even say it's unnatural, but

our activities are accelerated, right? Accelerating, accelerating, accelerating. How do even say it's unnatural but the our activities are car accelerated rate excel or you know it's accelerated though how you know it wasn't just time for a fucking or you're talking to your man i know how do we know it's accelerate how do we know we just want to do for this this warm pocket this hot pocket yeah

the way they i think they've established it i mean i'm not an expert on it but i was just like himself I mean, the way they, I think they've established it. I mean, I'm not an expert on it, but at least it's like, I'm just like, I'm just like, it's not my kids. I don't think it exists either. I mean, I know a guy. I mean, you look back at,

you know, climate record and then you kind of see how it's progressed and then you look at the industrial age and then you see the acceleration from that point. And that's why they think that this time it's happening at a faster pace because what can we do? Move inland maybe because I don't think anybody's going to stop it. At this point there's really nothing you can do right? You can't stop, you can't stop it where it's at. I mean, temperatures is just going to keep rising. Yeah, probably. I mean, there are things that could be done, but you know, they hurt economically, and poor countries do not want to do them,

because they are not as developed as us, and so they probably will not do that. Like the Chinese, right? I mean, yeah, I mean. So why are we forced to feel the shame and the big target on American heads about this problem? So the other countries that are blame aren't they most for the most part? Tired of everybody blaming America for all the fuck of world's's it was I agree with that

He's like Build an air condition wall, so we were very cool inside yeah, everybody else fucking suffer out there I Think people depend on us to kind of solve... To lead the way? To lead the way. You think American exceptionalism still exists, huh? I mean, it definitely still exists.

Yeah, it is weird how America's like, we know what to do. Like at every turn, it's like, we know what to do. Well, I think because we do have a lot of very intelligent people that are born here, but we also have a lot of intelligent people that want to live here. Because they're so smart, they're able to come here and make their way here. Like, is that Elon Musk? Like all these really super- Oh, the Tesla guy?

Yeah, so these, they're, it's a large, we kind of drain, they call it, brain drain. So we drain the other countries of their other smartest and brightest how do you as uh... as a person how do you what do you do on a daily on a daily basis to uh... do things to help the environment terms of to reduce your carbon footprint to reduce my carbon footprint you had right now

uh... sewers it's not a school bus. All right. What could you tell my car? Oh, you got a, I got a Prius driver right here. So, oh, no. Okay. So I, so everybody leave me to fuck alone. I want to hear about no more. I want to hear about no more. I did my part. Yeah. Now I don't need to hear about it no more. If everybody drove a Prius, we would be in a good spot, right? I

Better say that we would probably have all our problems would be maybe I mean every other car companies out of business Only Prius is Well, no, everybody should go the Prius route with the less fuel like like Tesla, right? That's that's purely battery right? Oh, yeah, oh, that's the car you have No, no, I know that's a car you have? Uh, no. No, I can't. That's a, like, it isn't like base price like 80,000. I don't know if it's cars. I mean, you could do a little bit more and get a Tesla.

Yeah. You know you got the money. Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no I'm doing I mean I'm about solar panels. I got some of them to I mean I mean We're gonna go solar panels Dr. Green from the west coast they don't want to tell everybody in East Coast Where it's hurt dude We're a tart dude. Yeah. Yeah.

A wall with your car and everything else you do. No, I mean, my life style is not as green as it used to be. You stop caring, right? That's one thing you would impart to all the millennials today. Like, someday you won't fucking get care, either. All this shit that you think is so important, like a tranny using the bathroom someday. And it's not to say it isn't important, but some day you're just not gonna care.

Like you're just gonna be like with it. I care anyway, I mean, I don't care. What age are you in this stuff? Karen, what? Like when you lost your passion for all the old things. I care about stuff, I care about things still. I don't need the topic of the week I'm talking about. When my priorities just shift,

like now I have my steps on. So we live in a town that's 45 minutes from where I work So he could go to a better school. So I pollute the environment So I care less about the environment more about him, but I think that's pretty normal Most people care more about their family. Yeah, your little circles really all that yeah, you can can You can think about if I think about the big picture if I knew It was gonna reduce greenhouse gases. I would sense age to like an inner city like Detroit. Yeah I'm not a walk to school Any emissions yeah if I lived where I work that's essentially what my yeah kid would have to do so it's like

That's that's a kind of pleasure working that kind of town. Yeah, it's very poor And do you see kids go in the school and you're like I get poor bastards. Yeah, not like poor like no money But I see kids walking down the street by prostitutes on their way to school By way of work every single day. Oh prostitutes are gross. No Please ever they're so cool Yeah, so it's a very poor community. So so I do my part and go work in the poor Yeah. Please over there. It would be cool. Yeah. So it's a very poor community. So I do my part.

I could work in the poor. Yeah, but it's self-serving. So I don't even try. Yeah, I just think they forced me to do it, actually. Well, let's say somebody listening at a big, at a big, at a big, wants to start their own private business and wants to get you on the oh wants to snap me up yeah should I give out my phone number no no would you would you consider it or are you committed to your where you're at right now or are you well I have one more

year of residency left so I have to be in this program for one more year but afterwards it's you're saying like like a college player who gets drafted by the NBA or something like second year, like could you drop out residency just like to finish after finish. I have to finish. You'd be able to open up your own practice? Yes, I could. Would you stay in the area or would you want to move somewhere?

Maybe a little bit more where your patients are actually able to pay you then? I definitely want to move to probably more high functioning patients. I worked with kind of very poor people for a long time. So even before I went to medical school, I worked in a free clinic and then I worked in a free mental health clinic. And so I did my part. That's it. Like you bought your Prius. Right.

I did my time. There you go. So once you get everything done, you're officially a doctor, right? And I'm on TV. I'm already a doctor. Can we run a pill? Can we run a pill mill together? Yeah, Johnson. See that? See that? The Johnson flare. Oh, we're ready to dock. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Bristle. I'm already a doctor. Yeah, she bristles. Yeah. Do you cook at home, Eric? Yeah. And my wife, Shirley, she cooks. She cooks. Oh, okay. You got her in the kitchen. No shoes, right? No shoes. That's the way you do it.

Yeah, we don't wear shoes in the house. Barefoot. Now, come on. You know what I'm getting at? This is what Blue Aprons all about, man. Number one, fresh and green. Okay. It's cooking. Never use this therapy. You ever ever say that? Like I've... Oh, yeah. Yeah. No. It's cooking, ever use this therapy? You ever say that? Like I've- Oh yeah?

Yeah. No, for sure. I mean, and, uh. Your wife's like, like I'm sad. You're like, make me a sandwich bitch. That's my prescription. I get one. No, I mean, a lot of people have physical health problems

because they don't know how to actually go and shop. They don't know how to shop healthy. I have a personal work in what they're right now. Healthy, I don't know how to shop at all, they don't know the concept of like grabbing something and paying for it. They're called shop lifters. Yeah, they've made a joke to my therapy supervisor that I was going to buy my patient, Blue Apron. Actually, really?

Oh, well, not allowed to do that, but I was like, my patient blue apron. Actually. Oh really? Yeah. Not allowed to do that, but I was like, because they, even if you use the self so poorly that they buy such unhealthy food, even if you recommend it though. Blue apron? Like right on prescription.

Yeah. No, I mean like, could you recommend it to the patient like during a therapy session? Like, yeah, this there's this, um, there's a service. Blue apron. Yeah, I, I, I might not promote a specific this, there's this service blue apron. Yeah I might not promote a specific service but in this case it would be no. As long as they use blueapren.com slash TSD then yeah and surely there's no make sure the promo code gets on the yeah yeah like don't fuck this up you fucked everything else up do not

fuck up this code but yeah man so this person who doesn't had a shop like this this this month or upcoming spinach and fresh uh... what's real as you tie and say pizza with a bunch of stuff on it sweet and sour salmon with bok choy me like that parmesan crested chicken baby Brock all kinds of stuff, man. Hey, what's wrong with Ming? Yeah, what the fuck is wrong with Ming? Is he? I call them a sociopath, right? Is he? I mean, it's possible. He's not rolling an apple. Why are you the doctor? Are you in the market for an apprentice?

Some of the stuff that you that he that happens and the things he says and the things he does and The amount of time he spends away is kind of odd Right. Yeah, so or is it like I always wondered like does he spend amount of time he spends away is kind of odd. Right. Yeah. So, or is it like I always wondered like does he spend so much time away doing these things because he really like he was quiet. When when we first met him he said he was quiet in college, quiet in high school. But now like this motherfucker is a life of the party like no kidding.

Every single con he goes to and it's a lot and there's a lot of them. Everybody knows him. Everybody's talking to him. Hugs and helloes and all this other shit. Like is it, he's just making up for those lost years where he was invisible and now he's like the man? Where's he just a sociopath? Ha ha ha ha.

I mean, yeah. I mean most people, when they reach reach that age they no longer do that. They don't covet. They don't covet. Especially if they have a family. So you would. Oh boy. I wish you was here. This was so bad.

Oh, I guess this. Oh my god. Can you come back next week? I want to get everybody here. I want everybody here. I want to get everybody here. I want you to diagnose all of our fuckedups. That would that be the start circle. I'll help you out.

I'll help you out. Go to the air. Oh, this will be, oh, when's the next time you're back in Jersey? We'll probably come back much more often now, because my schedule is a little bit lighter. So we'll probably might come back this summer. We gotta get him back on well and we'll do like, we'll get the whole, we get Frank, we'll get all the Frank's, we get everybody. And you can, you know, like Frank five, you can be like, what's up?

Why leave in your wife on Thanksgiving? Oh, be great. Yeah, what a crew, right? When you think of everyone, like, together all their, different like mental problems Yeah, man, Ming all right Cooking together built strong family bonds as a guy of a family that guy who doesn't have a shot He doesn't but I mean he needs to build more bonds with anyone so all right Well research shows a blue paper families cook nearly three times more often

Delivered to 99% of the continental blah blah blah blah blah blah. Yeah, it's good man Just cue uses it. What more do you need to know? Affordable variety flexible easy guaranteed all that shit blue apron comms like a SD That's a deal sealer cue uses it. Yeah, why don't you need to know that's that should have been the end of the commercial Q's that next well yeah, you're a doctor like oh, but you have to complete the like if if you don't like let's say drop out this last year you're still a doctor. Yeah, but you're a doctor after you finish medical school. Okay. So what does a residency mean then? Residency is a additional training so you can practice on your own like specialize and so yeah Also, so after this then you could be like Bob my heart

Like seeing seeing your own like open your own practice. Or maybe you could get a soprano Like you could start seeing some gangsters and stuff you come to Jersey like like was that like was that lady who was who was diagnosing Tony soprano. Oh, was that lady who was diagnosing Tony soprano? Oh, Dr. Melfi. Yeah. That'd be cool, right? I mean, she only got threatened like every other episode.

Yeah. Yeah, your patients was threatened, you right? At least she had a nice house and stuff though. Yeah, my patients get threatened. They don't threaten you though? No, they threaten me all the time. Really? How do you deal with that? We have a lot of security, but I don't know, it doesn't really bother me anymore. Are they threatening you for what, for more medication or for? So I work, so as well as working at a community clinic, I work in a psychiatric emergency room like an

impatient hospital. So sometimes the police bring them there against their will and they're really psychotic, so they'll start, like, I don't know, they'll threaten just to punch me in the face if I don't let them out or like, sometimes they even attack people. What does that do mentally, though, like when you're dealing with that kind of like patients are on that level of psychosis,

or is that the word? Like, how do you decompress from that, do you want that all day long? And then you, I mean, is it just go home and deal with your family? Or like, how do you, like, how could you remove yourself from that and not be like, like, affected by that?

Is it gonna take out my day on one of those prostitutes? I mean, jack-a-ble-up. I mean, yeah, it takes a little bit of onwinding. It was kind of like a lot like grown up in the Johnson household. So is there a way more than that? No, I mean, you all the Johnson I don't really take it too seriously when I'm there. You kind of, yeah, I don't know, just talk about it with the other staff a little bit. And so you can't take anything personally because the people are very sick. I don't mean the, I don't mean the threats. I mean, just the kind of stress level of, of like constantly having to deal with people who are not, who are not there. They're not able to have a normal conversation

so they're like, they're psychotic though. How do you decompress from that, deal with that all day long though? How do you with the bad jokes? I know, bullshit stories. I don't know, I just watch TV, who I grew up with. Was like, that's it Oh, yeah, he's writing stuff for prescription, huh?

You're on self-prescription, right? Yeah, you'll have to do that. It was your license. I mean, actually, it's good for stress. Every board exam I took, I always listen to Talim Steve Dave on the way to the board exam because it takes my mind off of like the things that, are also I start thinking about things I might have studied more. Wow really. Yeah, so damn That's incredible. We've got some elite listeners. What give me your top five episode list Doctor J's top five

There go to one are you only listen to it once you never go back and let's do another one ever Is that you're the only let's you usually only listen to him once okay? You buy the Christmas ones or your Brian's give me yeah, he gives them to me I was in maybe you richly rich me along because I was still in medical school Yeah, so this I consider it a once-year care package. That cost me nothing. No, no, stand out for me. What about, I said you listened to episode 300, we're

getting them got married. I wish getting was here. He said, oh my god. Yeah, that's a little disappointing. What's your feelings on getting them? I mean, my feeling is that if he has aspergers, it's pretty mild. Oh, he's, he was, he's pretty highly functional, I think. He's high-fung.

He resets when doctors give an honest. A pretty, people say like, like, it's just a tad, it's just a touch. He wants full blown. He wants, no, he doesn't. Yeah, that's, that's,

cousin has aspergers full blown. And it's like, nothing like it. I, that's... That's because it has as perjures full blown, and it's like nothing like it. I've seen people even less functional than our cousin. Yeah, and it can be pretty difficult. So he's able to work here. He is. It's not, it's not, that's pretty high function.

He's more high function, the most of my patients. So he said he can't detect sarcasm, right? He can't be... He's a hard time deciphering sarcasm he says. Yeah, so he's like the king. He would be the king in the land of yeah, so aspergers. Yeah, so social cues is a big thing on autism spectrum. So sarcasm is like definitely body language, those types of things. Yeah, he's these are the things that he'll he'll text me questions at night, I guess, when he's dealing with some other people. He'll ask my opinion, because he can't read it properly.

Bryce said. Yeah. Just assume it's all sarcastic. So really, there's not too much I could do for him, but I could sell you some training if you want. Like, I could come in here and coach you. I could give you some. Can you give me some points?

Some free tips. Some free tips. You know, me some point? So free tips. Free tips. You know, I don't need them totally well. You know, just enough to get by. Like, what's the best way to deal with somebody on the spectrum like that? You should fire them.

A lot of reinforce the compliments. Or should I be a specific thing that matters? I think you have to be very like simple directions and very clear like direct That's what you say, right? Like he's not a good like self-motivator like he doesn't just go do stuff You always gotta tell him what to do He's getting better though. Yeah, he's getting better But at first yes, yeah, like if you have them have them break down some boxes or something You would probably just say hey today

I need to break down 8 am yeah So in case you could wear these shit on These two like two like cooking gloves I shouldn't say so I've never met him You basically know me listen to Tom Steve Dave exactly the same off-mic as he is on Mike. That's the beauty of a leave.

Yeah. Nothing changes. He says, knowing as fuck as he is on Mike as he is on Mike. I can't believe it. But lovable. Still lovable. Oh, sure. I mean, he seems like a very nice guy.

Yes. Are you ever concerned that like, because I've seen him get red faced like a couple weeks ago, he thought the Walt Stole is can of beans, and became very like agitated by the idea. And Walt did nothing to like, like, disabuse him of the notion, like sort of just left it hanging there,

like maybe I did. Is it cool to talk to retarget? I guess it's what we're asking. Yeah, we don't. Oh, is that allowed anymore? First of all, he's not intellectually disabled, right? He's super smart. Oh my god, this fucking bitch.

Wait a minute, wait a minute. I think I cue is, I think, higher. Allegedly. Super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super super If I'm gonna like say my IQ is 10 points higher than his but I can't remember the numbers, no verification or anything. Look, he's getting his super super into it. I told him the other night, I asked him a question about something, he knew it immediately. As I said, it's like having the human version of Siri. You know, I'm able to just like text them like, do you know this?

Boom, he knows it. It's great. You know, you know, the Google's it. It's too quick. Yeah. Yeah, it's too quick. He just knows it.

But a lot of people call him on shit. They're like, what he's, what he's saying is total bullshit. It's not true because he like, he will. He, he doesn't hesitate and he'll come, he'll come through with like an answer. And you're just like, okay, because he seems confident in that answer.

But then people will write in like he's not right. Well, I, I would have to question if they're right. Yeah. Yeah, I would, I would take, I would get him. And always right. At this point, from what I, from dealing with, get him, I'm always going to, I'm always going to lean towards get him if I'm unsure. It would, if some fucking Joe blow is emailing in, like, you've got to prove your answer to me. I'm just going to towards get him if I'm unsure. If some fucking Joe Blow is emailing in, like you've got to prove your answer to me.

I'm just gonna take your word for it. I've been get him's like a clock. He's reliable, huh? The only shows up on time, never late. Never late. Comes in, like I gotta tell him to stay home when it's snowing too hard. He's that reliable.

How many times has that been? It's been a rough winter so far. There was times like you cannot come in today, we're not gonna be open and he was like, he's all bummed out, he's all stressed out about it and everything, because he's like a super worker. This is a different story than what I hear. Many times when I

come in before like we do the show and you're like stupid asshole. Did I make a mistake? No, there's not times I cannot be honest and say there hasn't been times I've been annoyed by some of the things he's done but I can't I can't dis is his uh... his liability and his uh... and his uh... like taking the responsibility of being here when he's supposed to be here even to the point where I'm like asshole stay home

that you can't come in today we're not opening the bucket six that's a better problem to have right then exactly and i'm not complaining about it have you thought about maybe replacing some of your other employees with other with good-hum clones? I just, I mean, from the ass purchase pool. I mean, it's not a bad idea. I mean, like, I mean, I think, what, I think Mike right now is probably is scheduling

a test right now to make sure he's like, I'm on this spectrum. I'm on this spectrum. I'm on this spectrum. I'm on this spectrum. I'm on this spectrum. I'm on this spectrum. I'm on this spectrum. I'm on this spectrum. I'm on this spectrum. I'm on this spectrum. That would be amazing. Like Mike gets his fucking pink slippers.

Like, what, why? You're like, well, somebody comes in there like, I do your job now, Mike. Mike has to come back for comic book. Yeah. Zip recruiter. Oh, they're back. They're back.

You're back. You're back. You're back. You're back. You come back for comments. Yeah. Zip recruiter, they're back. They're back. Yeah. They went over the statistics. They found out that Tom Steve Dave must have really helped their bottom line because

they're back. Zip recruiter.com slash TSD. This is the one where I was like, what do you do? I think it's not for people who watch jobs, it's people who are giving jobs. Yeah. Low jobs and hand jobs.

Are you hiring? Do you know where to post your job to find the best candidates? That's what you would do. Well, right, if Gettom wasn't here, you're like, let me go to Zip Recruiter. I'll put it up, see if anybody wants the job. Yeah, and then you post your job to 200 plus job sites, including social media networks, like Facebook and Twitter, all the single click.

Just post once and watch your qualified candidates roll in. No juggling emails or calls to your office. Now let's say you have your own doctor's office someday. Use if recruited.com slash TSD. Yeah, of course. Yeah, you got a finer receptionist, right? I'll find all sorts of things. And you're like, must be hookerish. You know, not a hooker, but hookerish. So that will pull all the resumes where people have described themselves as hookerish.

Yeah. Or hookerish. Yeah. Any time you see hooker right to my inbox. Yeah, and anybody who's not, you're just like boom right into the junk mall or whatever. Find out today why Zip Recruit has been used by Fortune 100 companies. Am I suck, right? Like is Fortune 100 better or where's some Fortune 500? I think it's better, right? It's in top 100 countries. Oh, okay. All right, so one of the top 100 companies in the whole world use them. So, wait, these people who have smaller businesses, I think they're too good. Thousands of small, medium sized businesses.

Please stylize and add personal anecdotes explaining what you like best about Zippery Cruder, that the spot is over, I guess. I mean, come on, how am I going to say, oh, you you know what I like best about zippercrooter it's so fucking yeah it's so difficult though since we haven't been hiring anybody off the zippercrooter it's difficult but you know it's still a great service and check it out so what a salesman all right there you go

so did you were said he he was gonna diagnose you today, though? Yeah, give me a full diagnosis, man. Being unreliable. It's not my fault, right? Being unreliable. I mean that's more of a personality issue. I don't really know so you know and Like if I don't show up to a con they can't shame me, right? Yeah, they could. Pro. They do. I mean, because you think bipolar people are also very highly functioning.

I mean, there's a lot of people that are like PhDs. Somebody wrote a book. They said they thought Mozart was bipolar. So because you have so much increased energy that you're during certain periods, people tend to develop skills and like writing, you know, and those types of things, but then they kind of fall down and they go into kind of slumps. So if it's a side effect of, I mean, if it's something that's happening

because of your depression, Then they can show me. Yeah. But, I mean, now, I mean, so, and bipolar, you get the highs and you get the lows. I mean, we know how long the highs list. It depends sometimes like, sometimes only like a couple hours, sometimes a couple weeks. Yeah. Does that sound normal too? Yeah, so normally, most, I mean, most, so an episode of hypomania is like five days long, episode of mania is seven days long.

And that's a full-blown kind of episode. Those are in the minimum standards to meet the diagnosis, but sometimes, I mean, they can last for months. Hi. Yeah, hi. Remember like two years ago, I had like a month long high where I was like exercise and it felt good every day. And then like that, like somebody switched a light off. Yeah.

And so this, That's all you're doing with this exercise? I know. Yeah, I was doing push ups, fucking 12 hours a day. No, no, I was, I was, I was exercising and I was writing stuff. I can't remember what it was at the time, but I was doing pushups, fucking 12 hours a day. No, no, I was exercising and I was writing something. I can't remember what it was at the time, but I got so busy. Always busy, always doing something

and like in good spirits and then. A month. Yeah, it was after, like, remember I had to go to the hospital because I was like, they thought I had a nervous breakdown because I couldn't see straight and shit. No. Yeah, I was on Sage's birthday. And they took me to the hospital

because like somebody was trying to hand me like a bottle of water and it was like this. That like this. Like I wasn't seeing it and I was like really out of it and then like a day or two later like something like clicked in my head like I heard like a click in the morning. Yeah and then I was like oh everything's good. What was that? Was that the endorphins? I mean that usually was the endorphins. I really don't know what the what he's talking about Endorphins It's something released some sort of chemical release into a spinal cord doesn't usually work that way

But I mean that's so it's come it's standard like six to nine months. So They tend to stabilize and they'll come like kind of like in a wave So I mean you could just email them at certain months and then maybe take. If you want to know if you want to know something two months from now, you know me. So what's your last high? Was that it? No. No, it was probably a couple weeks ago.

Are you going to, are you feeling, are you in a down now or no? No, just a little. No, you know what I was, I was down last week because we didn't do the show. Like when Q was like I'm sick and then like we'll do it tomorrow and then it's like I'm sick again. And then it like sunk really low. Did it. Yeah, yeah, I hate not doing it. We just said let's get, get them, aren't you? Um, yeah, I could, but then by that point, yeah,

then we had to do the con and shit. So I was like, well, and that didn't do anything to like boost it. It didn't boost it? No, I mean, we did the, we did the vulgar screening and Q and A, which was fun. It was later than I would have liked it. But then to me, like that's, and every cons, the same thing. The panel is the high.

It's like a rush. And then anything after that is like, like that peaks, and then anything after that is just down. So, doing a panel is a rush. Yeah. Like now, if somebody feels it's like, the exact opposite. I feel like we have a panel coming up

and I absolutely dread it and don't want any part of it. What's my deal, what's what am I dealing with? I mean, why do you dread it? Is it because you're don't want to speak in front of people? Yeah, the expectations of people staring at me and demanding an answer. So I mean, it sounds a little bit like like stage fright. I have to be more serious than that. That's the hard race.

It's like it's a plus. My heart race? Yeah. Yeah. Does my back, it is my back sweat. Performance anxiety type stuff. I mean, you could, you never have that. Don't accuse them of that.

Yeah. No performance anxiety. You could have that. We're talking about it. And you can take it out of that. Because he brings the he brings it home. So yeah, like, what would you, what would you do to help that? I you can take a, there's medication. I'm not taking any fucking meds. I tried to give him Xanax work. So he won't take it. I have to, I have the same problem. I've done it. And it works. It's crazy. Like I had to stand in front of like and present. They call it morning report in the hospital and there's like, you know, 35 doctors there.

And basically the older ones, the attendings, they sit there and yell at you and dress you down in front of everyone. They keep you to look like an idiot for not doing things. And so I've never wanted to be an old doctor as much as I knew right now. So I took, it's a Bato blocker medication, so it kind of calms down your nervous system, keeps your heart rate, even, and stuff. And I was giving my thing, and everything they said, I just didn't care. You're like, it's all good old fox.

Almost dead. I'm anti-med, though. I want one of those Catholics that won't take medications like I can't dispense them and I won't take them Outside of buffer I don't know the last time I took a medicaid I couldn't even tell you it's got to be like 20 maybe when I had mono I you shouldn't take medication from mono the Whatever the whatever medicine they get me and a biotics maybe they gave me I don't know what what they say I have like any physical health problems like high blood pressure or I cholesterol. I don't I don't believe in that either I don't know I've been a doctor either. Yeah, so if I ask I'm gonna find out and I don't want to find out right but I haven't taken a minute

I'm buffering an aspirin. I'll take an aspirin when I when I feel like I can't take it more on a bite of like a Teeth of that a bite leather I'll take a buffer I'll cool out with a buffering So what if I'm not gonna take take medicine? How do I handle the feelings of dragon? So I mean, you could do like exposure therapy kind of like it's yeah, get his ass on a plane. And get his ass on a plane. Yeah, I won't go on a

plane, neither. Yeah, I was telling him I'm the my flight out here, I was thinking about you and I was thinking that you're probably who's trucking off the bathroom. He's like, I was telling him I'm the my flight out here. I was thinking about you and I was thinking that you're probably He was joking off the earth after he's like I'm kind of in the mile high club There's so much turbulence You were scared Yeah, I was I got a little bit anxious. It was more than I usually experience in a plane So do you feel like less like you don't feel like you got to keep it together for a wife?

I did. Yeah, I was like, there's nothing. You're like, don't worry. I put the brain face on. Yeah, my head, I'm like, massive. Yeah, because you're like, we're all gonna die. If you're married to like, or your father is a doctor, psychiatrist, and he shows stress, then you know,

it's like, oh, it's fucking Defcon four. is it one which is the worst or one which is the worst? Defcon 1. Yeah, it's the worst is that the worst one. Yeah, if he's if he's Defcon 1 then you know it's like it's What were you Defcon why he's like now? Defcon 1 is like to stain this pants I mean now it's not like you're married to some slob man like he's got a hot wife who quit and try it who quit and hit on right yeah Yeah, yeah, quit and hit on her about five minutes years and years and years ago Yeah, we had like a barbecue and Q came over and proceeded to get real drunk and like was kind of cut yeah shockingly and Then proceeded to like kind of hit on her like it all 30 and shit

Joker at that point now. I wasn't even a Joker. all 30 and shit. Was he a Joker at that point? No, it wasn't even a Joker. How do you mean, was he a fireman at that point? He was a fireman. I mean, yeah, in the way he, how did he do? So he used my nephew who was in high school. And he, remember, he was like, you got paid attention to this uncle. This shit.

Yeah, that's a lot of fun. That's what he is. Yeah, he's trying to butter her up and shit. Yeah, yeah, she's beautiful and shit, huh? Right, though. Then you got her, you beat a Joker. You beat a Joker, man. That's fucking, that's a complicated one.

If you dive those Brian as bipolar, what's, what's Qden? I mean, I would have to maybe spend more time with him. Just based off of him. I mean, it really sounds like he just based off of knowing him a little bit and then hearing him on the show describes moods. He sounds more along maybe like major depressive disorder. Really? Psycho-phymia?

No, he sounds like he gets most terrestrial. Yeah. Like sometimes like he'll come on and like actually feel bad for him. Oh, yeah, yeah I feel bad for him too when he Completely and utterly I actually think you're I don't think you have any problems I'm like, hi! Tell them Steve Beans! Oh! Hear that everyone?

I've been telling you that for fucking seven years now we got a fucking doctor back in the oven. I knew it all along. I knew it from fucking day one. I'm cutting that shit out. Ah! Ah! Ah!

There's no more perfect ending. I didn't know it was no more perfect ending. Perfect ending Why you got my tension? Let me raise a toast Tell you what I wonder the most What would you be thinking if you saw me today? If I hear your voice tell me what would it say? Probably insulting but an anger of play Never could tell back in the day When my confidence is shaking

It's possible you'll realize Whether or not you were toxic to I'll have to stop and ventwiIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII Been damn near 20 but I still feel a burn All those lessons I feel the nerve Baby feel so small but somehow I yearn Be your miss broken concern What a world you see if I could take a phone Would you give me hell for being alone? Ask me why I have no family of my own And how'd you feel if I made it known?

I fear I treat my family globally Make them bear and disres Tell them the same cruel things you told me Make them feel second-rate They left me at 20 but I still hear your voice They're laments, won't eat, but I still hear your voice Tryin' to tell me that I have a choice To let the past go, reekin' my voice Enjoy what I am now when I rejoice Easier said and done Easy as said and done Easy as said and done This has been a production of SmartCo Internet Radio. Sir, only at smodcast.com