Tell Em Steve-Dave - #448: Sk8ter Boyz

Episode Date: July 20, 2020

Homeward Bound, The Ten Commandments and mortality.

You don't think evil can evil is just out to fucking snag some fucking tang fucking jump and snake river? I'm gonna go for it. Girls, you don't need to listen to this part. It's like something that Jean Kelly would have did in the fucking forties, but it's not around on a lamp post. Tell him, Steve Dave. Hello and welcome to this week's edition of Tell him, Steve Dave. I'm here with Walt. We've got Q by satellite.

Hello. There you are. It's better to, what's this little cut button on for? Okay. It's better this way, right? We get me and you are here, but we're not just talking to Q over the phone. We got them on Zoom so we can see that perfect visage.

Yes, yes. Yes. It adds a lot to it. Have you been doing a lot of zoom in lately, Q? I have not. I didn't pick it up early. Like a lot of other people did, so I didn't get into that habit. I have done it maybe four or five times over this whole event but not really. I'm enjoying what's a downtime not talking to people. Not being on zoom is what you're doing. It's been

pretty good. Not being online, not being on zoom, it's been pretty sweet. The second you stop online problems emerge. I wouldn't know any more. That's it. You do an zoom walk. It's just like FaceTime zoom? Yeah kind of. I don't know any more. That's it. You do it in a zoom wall. It's just like FaceTime zoom? Yeah, kind of. I don't have any capacity or any kind of ability to do any of that stuff. Yeah, what about the girls? I just come here and I punch you back. I'm like, fuck!

10 minutes before Q is on and I'm like, this is why I don't bother with any of this stuff. It is such a pain in the ass It all came down to one button being pushed One button. Okay, hey man. This would have been great. I actually said patience at least a little bit, right? Yeah, I didn't break anything Dear girls do it zoom like I think I'd stay in touch with friends and shit that one sure that's how they communicate with their friends I'm sure but I don't know I don't keep's how they communicate with their friends. I'm sure, but I don't know. I don't keep up to date on all this tech.

I'm on vacation. Officially on vacation? Officially on vacation. You pulled me from my vacation for this. Wow, he came out of, he kept, what is it, a week long? Yeah, it's a week long. I know one of the things you have planned. I thought you're still going out of cruise,

which really surprised me no Covid cruise that's the only kind that exists anymore. I'm just going on to Kate May I'm this the first vacation. I've ever taken that I am going to be doing nothing but R&R there's no like major plans like the girls and Their mother-in-law are gonna be going to the beach and I'm gonna be left in the room So I'm gonna have nothing but like sleep and sketching that's all I'm doing. That's all you're doing That sounds pretty good. Yeah, yeah I'm really looking forward to because it's like this the first because most of the time when I go on vacation

It's like a torture test.'s an endurance test, right? You get your getting poison apples on your feet. You're it's all kinds of shit Well, there's so much fucking jam packed on the itinerary. I'm like I'm fucking more tired on vacation I am at home them doing more work and sweating more when I'm on vacation I am when I'm actually you know my nine to five now Kate may is at the very tip of New Jersey, and it's widely regarded as sort of an old person, funny-duty type place, like, because here's Wildwood,

and then, no, at one time, I would've been like, Wildwood or nothing. Now, I agree with you. Was it shit, right? That's where we fucking bon Jovi's filmed that video. Yeah. What was it? Internet of Love?

I can't remember. Yeah, um, what was it? In and out of love? I can't remember. Uh, yeah, that was the part. That was a party place. That was before anybody got real excited about seaside because of Jersey short. It was like, oh my god, we're going to Wildwood. My grandmother used to march. You used to go wildwood too. It was wildwood was the was the place. Yeah, my grandmother used to march in the VFW parade every summer. So we would go down. And you know, since there wasn't a lot of money, it was like 10 people to the fucking to the little apartment thing. It would be like us and then my aunt and uncle and Sean, you know, remember and Carly, my cousins, they would go to. But like, I don't know, you just didn't give a fuck if you

were sleeping on the floor and a sleeping bag or on a kid Like you just didn't give a shit. You're a young man. You're adventurous. Yeah, what happens? What happens to the adventure? You wise up. You're like, it's not that awesome to sleep on a floor with fucking ten people. Yeah, I guess Unless it's an orgy going on. There's no reason to be on a floor with ten people or you're ducking for cover for one reason or another. Did you see there's a documentary on Action Park coming up? I think it's either just came out or it's coming out. Did you go to Action Park when you were young? I went there once. I went there once as well. You go there, Q. I was there a couple of times.

Actually, I think Sal might have done an interview for this. They asked us if we would do an interview as part of it. And I didn't really have many memories of it, but I think Sal and Joe did that documentary. I just went once when I was a kid and then once when I heard how disastrous it was, I went to go check it out. It just looked like a water park to me. I wasn't blown away by it. Now I don't think you were supposed to be, but the, um, I guess they do want you to be blown away, but I think they were one of the first ones to have that

like circular, you know, like you go down the water slide and it goes in a loop. And they were like, if people were too light, they wouldn't get the whole loop and they would go back down and so it would smash into all the fucking time. That's not that Johnny Knox felt that movie's about right? Is the last movie he put out? We place a guy who runs a water park. It's based on action park. I thought I never had it sit. Oh, I didn't see it either. But I just heard it comes from the action park bullshit. I don't. That has to be such a regional thing. Does anybody really care about that in the rest of the country? No action park. Yeah, probably not. They used to call it a traction park or class action park because so many people got hurt. I personally got hurt going down the Alpine slide once. I got a nasty like burn on my arm, that cart on that cement track, and then

another time I crashed on a quad. Really? Yeah, because you had to have a driver's license. Of course I didn't have one because I was 14 and they were like, well, just write down a number. I just wrote a number down and they let me have this quad. I never ridden one before. Almost immediately I go off the track into the woods. I, the only, I jumped in off that, remember that waterfall used to jump off of? Yeah.

That was like a cement ledge. I jumped off that and I hit the bottom too hard and bump my ankle, but I didn't get hurt, but it just seemed like everything in that park was just designed to hurt you in one way or another. Now why, like, you know, people, today everybody's real worked up about different social issues. And you're like, you got to understand it was just the time. And I think Action Park is another one of those things

where like if you opened up a water park today where people were getting hurt, they did. They did recently, within this, during the time of us recording Tom Steve Dave, remember that jacket? Oh yeah, yeah. Where did some kid got beheaded?

That was them? Yeah. I thought that was somewhere in like Ohio or some shit. That was Action Park where kid got beheaded. No, no, it was Action Park, but there's, but you know, about a park that opened up within modern times. Right. So ill conceived that a child with his head was fucking removed from his body. That was, that was like

the tallest, yeah, whatever. Yeah, yeah, we talked about it. Yeah, I remember we talked about it. So it's like during the time that we've been recording this thing, this monstrosity was built and somehow some way it got approved by whoever is on the board of water slide approvals. Where's tallest water slide? When was this? This was 2016. so almost it's coming up on four years ago 10-year-old Caleb Schwad was decapitated while riding what had been dubbed the world's tallest water slide how does that happen 168 feet tall he was found dead at the bottom of the ride in a pool he boarded the raft of two women who were not related to them and they both suffered minor cuts and scrapes on their face in the incident

wait why? yeah that's what it says uh... basically they're not really saying okay so here's an eyewitness account uh... a witness that she was about to ride the water slide when she saw emergency responders below covering the boy and attending to two people who were injured. He got ejected from his seat, bounced around in the netting and the slide and then just fell down. I mean, without having any context what the slide looks like. And that's why as a child, I didn't really go to action park.

Like, my biggest action was just the bus ride. Yeah. Yeah. That's my mom told me that we could die on any one of these rides and she was proven right. 40 years later. Once. Yeah. I took it to heart, man. I'm just one of those kids that I believe with my mom told me. You know, I never jumped off the bridge for the same reason. Very, very young Pam told me not a lot of people used to jump off the bridge in the town that we lived in. And it was almost like a right-of-passage.

Like all through the 70s, they would jump off the bridge into the 80s too. And there was also a swing, like a rope swing underneath the bridge. And that was what people used to do. Sometimes, it was one of those bridges, what drawbridge, yeah, drawbridge. And so it goes up and then the bottom, the counterweight, is all the way down towards the water. And this guy, Tommy Mason, like people would jump up and they would hold on to it. And then let go at the last second. And Tommy Mason did not let go at the last second. And it clipped off the tips of all his fingers. Oh shit. Yeah. That was a big story

that summer. Yeah, I remember seeing that he was an older kid than us, but I remember seeing him on the bus. You know, you know, after that a tragedy and just staring at his hand is, you know, and being like, all his fingertips, Spagon, all of them are gone yeah yeah you know how hard it is cute like you live in that small town and you're one of the few boys that won't jump off it I mean I I don't mind but you know that they like they had fucking admired all the boys who jumped off they were fucking they were catches and the guys who guys who listen to their mother, oh, you're fucking heard.

You're dweeb. You're safe. Yeah, well, I got all my digits. There was somebody jumped off that bridge. Oh, you swore him. Yeah. I just don't understand like, um, you would get mad a lot like the women were just. Oh, you're a dweeb, jump off the bridge or I'll never They would go watch, they would go watch the guys jump off the bridge and they're in their little They would be wearing jean shorts, a lot of times jean shorts Oh wow, this sounds good Yeah, but now there's a new bridge up there

There's no way to prove your manhood, I went back, tried to do it Oh you can't jump up there No, you would break your neck, somebody, somebody, as soon as the bridge went up, somebody jumped off and hit like a cement pillar and died. Is that true? Yeah. Like almost immediately. They weren't sure if it was a suicide or not.

That was a suicide. Yeah, I mean, maybe. But the guy hit like that cement foot on the bottom and then like rolled off into the water. Well, I saw an IJ, okay. I mean, you guys jumped off a fucking, a tremendously high thing in that, like, that rock jump and into the water. Yeah.

Upstate New York. Oh my God. Dear Ron, I think it's called dear Ron or something like dear, dear, dear pan or something. Yeah. How high was that? That was scary. That was high. What's up? How high was it? It was pretty high. I think it was like 20 feet or something like that. It gave me the willies man

It was high that was another watching I jumped off the willies like like that pit the nervousness in the pit of my stomach that had to be higher than 20 feet What's that had to be higher than 20 feet? 20 feet not that high you guys look pretty high up to be higher than 20 feet. 20 feet is not that high. And you guys look pretty high up. What's the place called? Well, they do something with the camera angle

and make it look even worse. Do you want to do your walk? Oh, yes. I don't know. A little trick photography makes us. It's all about perspective. And it looks higher. I mean, I'm not taking anything away from it.

It was high. But that angle, the thing is you're high. You know, they make it look higher than it really is too though. I don't, I figure what it's called. It's like dear, dear, dear jumper, dear walk. Can you verify? Well, like maybe I could look right now. Hold on.

Can you verify that there was some trick photography use and it wasn't really as high as it looked? No, I mean, not consciously. There wasn't a special like telephoto lens on there to give like a weird like television on the camera. They each look eight feet tall. Doesn't have it. I don't know.

I'm trying to find it online. I know people ask have asked where it is and stuff like that, but I don't know if no cliff jumping for you and you're young. No, no, no, like the daredevil is always going to be sexy. There's just nothing you can do about it, but in the and to stay at stay at home, staying your lane guy just doesn't get the same accolades as the daredevil. Although we should. Should he? For being prudent? I don't know why he should because it takes more discipline. Rather than, I mean, Q, I mean, wouldn't you think about it? He really espouses all this shit like that nitro circus thing we went to.

Everybody like, I never saw so many guys do flips on minibikes in my life. It was hours of guys don't flip on minibikes. I can't find it. You can't find it. Yeah, find it. Uh, now, were you ever in nitro circus type like did you have a BMX that you would go off jumps and such? I had a BMX but I didn't, I wasn't a tricks guy. Most I would do was like a wheelie.

Can you do a bunny hop? Do you have some dirt jumps? Hmm, I'm that now. I couldn't. I know. But you could never do a bunny hop. No, probably not well. I might have just snuck one out. I'm now I could Know which could you ever do? Probably not well. I might have been stuck one out you could yeah Sun you're human not a bunny. You don't want to be hopping your bike around I

Was on my bike. I was a little dare devilish At least I thought so like I tried like with the fans. Should I try to jump over garbage cans? I tried to jump over my sister. I landed on her stomach with my back tire Other than that yeah, but it seems like that guys who are doing dare double tricks on bicycles though They usually they can do cool tricks when they're like you know late teens It's not to me anyway. It didn't, it always felt like you're way too old to be riding a bike. You're too old to ride a bike, but the shit that people do with those X games, you're like, oh my fucking god, they're like 30, 40 feet in the air, they're like, they're spinning

the bike around. It's nuts. I feel the same way about skateboarders, like not even professionals, but when I see somebody skateboarding around, that's like over 20. I'm like seriously, and if they're in their fucking late 30s, early 40s, forget it, I judge this shit out of them. I'm like really, you love it that much. And they probably do, otherwise why would they have a skateboard? But-

Did you skateboard cute? Yeah, I could do it, I could skateboard, but I'm falling off. Can you do any tricks and shit like that? No, I could do that Martin McFly thing where he hits the back and he catches it Oh, really that's about it kick flip Also in the city in Manhattan and definitely in Brooklyn. It's different bride There's a lot of people who use fake skateboards because there's no it's better than using a Car walking Brooklyn I I wouldn't watch a bunch of fucking hipster douchebags. Of course,

are riding around on skateboards. Some of them, some of them, but they have people have always kind of used them and shit like that. They've never gone out of sight here. I may take some lumps for this, but I don't like girls skateboarding either. I know it sounds weird. You're going to take lumps for for that. I do, I just, I feel like girls who skateboard like, not all of them, 98% of them are like, I just have something to prove. I can do it too. Well, I mean, it doesn't,

but they don't have something to prove. Yeah, but I mean, if you like it, if you actually like it, okay, but if you're doing it just to prove something, I don't know, there's just something about it. I feel like they're like, hey, us two. I don't know why. I'm not even saying it's rational. I'm just saying that's just something about it. I feel like they're like hey us two Yeah, I don't know why I don't I'm not even saying a traditional. I'm just saying I don't know I asked Mary Beth. She said that she used to skateboard and she just was trying to fit in trying to be a part of something

I was like see who is that you fucking pathetic loser? Who is this Mary Beth Who was this? Mary Beth. So the person you love most on the planet did it so you assume it's bunk for all women. Yeah Yeah, my mother wouldn't let me have a skateboard never Rode a skateboard either never even rode one How are you allowed to go to the wreck and play football? She must have not known a football is different I mean it wasn't tackle.

We would play tackle, but I wouldn't tell her. Oh, yeah. Yeah, but... And it was on cement, wasn't it? Well, yeah, then it was too hand-touch on cement, but we would play some beach football we would tackle. And... But yeah, I don't think she...

But yeah, but anything on wheels, like, you know, plus, you know, it had that connotation, you know, there was, you know, that you were gonna break your arm, maybe break your neck Maybe wind up in a wheelchair forever Yeah, do you think I mean right now like I Were to be like paralyzed from the neck down. I'd probably be like just kill me like it don't come on And I'm curious solid and just kill me

Does nb fucking follow through? You're like for you want to get for your you come in on the come in of down the aisle on escape board for your fucking your horrible you're like I finally get it You paralyzed waist down, but you said I do before you lost consciousness like now I'm your obligation I do before you lost consciousness. Oh, like, now I'm your obligation. And so is Sage.

Yeah. Your life just changed irrevocably. So I'm on my way back down the island. And I'm like, whoa. This one's for love. Just try the jump. I'm trying to show off the front of her hand. Look at me, I'm young, just like her.

I think we talked about it. This is a couple of years back we were definitely doing Telmstev David at the time, a maid of honor pushed the bride into a pool like they're fucking around and she got paralyzed. How do you, I read also that they had like sort of not daily, they were trying, they were friends for a little while after that, but then they just sort of stop being friends. Somebody does that to you. Could you forgive them? Because it's a total accident. I don't like people pushing other people in pools unless they're like in a bathing suit or whatever already. Somebody in their clothes getting pushed into a pool

it's like I don't get the joke. They have shit in their pockets, like cell phones and fucking wallets and stuff you may not necessarily want to get what. So I don't really quite get it. Horseplay and Faldorall. Shenanigans is it's terrible. I don't like that either. I've never been a fan of that.

If I had to spend the week of my life doing the shit that I did when I was a teenager, like the going out and hanging out with my friends and just trying shit and riding my bike places and hanging out until like two in the morning and exploring shit all around stand-on and stuff like that. If you told me I have to do that for seven days straight, I would be like, please don't make me do this. It's like, what if you're getting paid for it? What if there was a little mini-dock on on cue? Like, you go back to your 14, 15-year-old days? I mean, if the point of it is to show how miserable I am and I'm getting paid, then yeah.

Alright, I'll do that. It's not like I want to do have the shit I do at my job anyway. But man, I'm just saying what you said before, like it changes at some point. Somebody's like, I'm not going to jump off that bridge anymore. Right. I don't want to sleep on floors anymore. Don't want to sleep on floors.. Don't want to sleep on floors. Like I have a mountain bike and I rode by Hart show on the other day. When I was in the early 90s, that's all I wanted to do.

Go up there, mountain bike was really fun. Now I'm like, I can't imagine the circumstances in which I'd want a mountain bike. Really? I don't know why though. I don't know why I lose interest in things like that. Oh, well, it's been a pattern. Yeah, yeah. that's true. Lily

pad like you like you say. Interested in one thing and then uninterested the next, or sometimes even the next minute or hour. It's a curiosity, bud. That's all I like to try all kinds of new stuff. What's wrong with that? If those girls with the escape boards could do it right Yeah, I wasn't good at skateboarding either. I remember there was I mean it was big in the 70s Everybody had a fucking skateboard and there was a guy I remember him You know this is difficult to sort of convey but very sort of steep hill at a win-war apartments And I remember watching a guy do a handstand on a skateboard and going down. Yeah, like tricks were all the rage, man. They loved it.

Never go to the tricks either though. So maybe the people do with guys do tricks though. Cause it was, I mean, it's all about impression. Impression the girls? Yeah. That's the only reason that dude gets on a skateboard and goes down a fucking hill of Dead Man's curve hill. So it wasn't for me There's no other reason like guys will do that shit like that. I'm sweating Jen and Dean That's true. Some people just like skateboarding man. There's a skill to it. There's definitely a skill to it. Oh, yeah I don't know why so why wouldn't they want to you know think evil can evil is just out to fucking snag some fucking tang fucking jump and snake river I let me reset and start started this way. I think everything that men do is mostly to get laid across the board

So yes, I agree with you in theory, but I but But I think that some people do it just to enjoy it. I mean, it's it's fucking fun. The adrenaline I guess. How come I don't get adrenaline? I don't get adrenaline. Probably because you were never taught to embrace or like the feeling of adrenaline. It sounds like you would acknowledge it. Yeah, it sounds like you were just taught to like kind of like not look at

adrenaline at all. Now did you turn around and teach your girls the same thing like adrenaline is not for you. No adrenaline junkies in this house. I don't think I don't think I taught them that. I just think it's it just happened, you know, I just think it's in flanagan. It's in your DNA. They just don't seem to have the adrenaline need, you know? It just doesn't like it. It's like a poison. Really? You start feeling ill. It's like poison.

It's like, well, no shenanigan flanigan. It's like it's, you know. That's what they call them in high school. By the book. But this is not the wrong with that. I don't think there's anything wrong with that. Yeah, but it's not fucking it's not glamorous. It's not fucking, you know, no one's ever going to fucking like when I'm not in the room. No, it's going to be like talking about. Did you see that guy? Do you see who just sat there? It's amazing. Oh, I don't think that's true. I think I've heard

people mention that before. But not the good way where they're like way where they're like like man. Oh, they admire you Yeah, there's no one fucking like you're right that I haven't heard No one talking about like they're talking about dudes doing alleys and Also fun hops I was talking about that guy that walked in and would immediately walk that in the room because there was too many people in there There's too much adrenaline in this room. I'm out Look at all the alleys going around here man. This place is awesome. I don't even know what all he is. I don't know I just remember the term I

Think it's when you like grab the skateboard and and pick up both of your heels and try to have your heels touch your butt and you hold the skateboard in your hand Is that what not? It's like something that Jean Kelly would have did in the fucking forties. But it's not a lamp post. Let's see how to, how to Ollie. Girls you don't need to listen to this part. Oh, I think yeah, I think you're right. Well, you kind of like you're pulling the board up. Yeah, I think that's all really I couldn't do it. I mean, still impressive to this. There you go. So how does he do it? So it looks like he goes, what I couldn't do that just because of my fucking knee at this point. He's riding a skateboard.

He does a deep knee bend. Then somehow he hops up. He's riding a skateboard. He does a deep knee bend, then somehow he hops up. Yeah, you're gonna push that back, foot back, somehow to bring it. I don't know how the fuck a skateboard defies gravity and comes up in the air. It looks like he's flying. It's a hoverboard.

Yeah, nice. Alright, it's skateboarding after all. So, I mean, that looks like that would be fun. So, maybe guys, this is a skate park down on Staten Island. Maybe we should go down and do some interviews when the COVID ends and see what these kids are up to. Yeah. Yeah, well, wherever Levine's Skater Boy shirts

will blend right in. Just bring your jaws skateboard. That's a great reference, little skater boy action for the girls. Yeah, pop on it. Would they wear helmets? Or are they like the people who wear helmets? Like they wear helmets, but not strap them on

so that when they go fly and so does the helmet and then they get brain damage I feel like they wear helmets at this point. I you don't really see a lot of people not wearing helmets anymore We used to skate around we used to roll her blade around. Oh, yeah, that's right. Yeah, got a little bit of adrenaline That's true. That's right. Yeah, maybe I am being a little too hard on myself In line skate being a little too hard on myself. In line, Skate... I think you being hard on yourself Walt, because like you should just accept how you are. Oh, definitely I accept it.

I just kind of resent that society fucking puts these daredevil on a fucking pedestal. Not him. They're so fucking courageous. Not enough sensible people around that list. Yeah, there's something about beingensible that doesn't draw the eye. For whatever reason, Pam used to like argue about that. She would be like, she was a nurse. And she'd be like, why do these sports stars make so much money? And you know, nurses who say people's lives make this much? And I'm like, because nobody wants to fucking watch you do it. You know,

only the freaky of people would want you to fuck watch a baby being born. Yeah, you won't fill a stadium with 100,000 cheering people for, you know, a nurse changing a baby's diaper. No way. Nobody cares. In fact, I would go out of my way not to watch it. Right. And plus like there's a skill to baseball

where it's like a crackhead could give birth. So it's like there's a skill to baseball where it's like a crack head could give birth so it's like there's like You know what I mean like never put never was it put so eloquently put it for spec Fucking on conscious crack head keep it birth that I might watch though conscious crack head. That I might watch though. Like telling me like, oh yeah, she's fucking spun or she's fucking flipping out on angel dust. There's a birth I'd want to watch, but a regular one would just be disgusting. Right, you know, but I'll pay to go see, you know, jeeter fucking play ball. Are they, are they having football this year? Well supposedly training camps open, you know very very soon baseballs right around the corner is gonna open Basketball, I mean every all the sports are coming back in theory, but no no fans, right? No no fans But who knows if it'll have if it's you know, I think

You know one big outbreak or maybe even a small outbreak could all torpedo it and I'll have to shut it all down, I imagine. And they're bringing a baseball back even though it would be so late in the season. They're like we can make a couple bucks anyway. It's going to be a very short season. 60 games, right? Yeah, I guess that would be half of the season, right? Yeah, roughly.

And now as a Yankee fan, would you want to see the Yankees win a short and season like games right? Well, yeah, I guess that would be half of the season, right? Yeah, roughly. Now as a Yankee fan, would you want to see the Yankees win a short and season like this, a COVID season, or would you rather be like, you know what? I'd rather them win it with Doring a real season or a season where it felt like it was. No, I'd take it. I'd take it. You know why? Because for the first time in about a decade, I would be able to sit down and watch baseball. I haven't able to do that in so long that I got out of touch with the Yankees. All sports really. I haven't been able to keep up with anything. So it's like, I can't wait for them to come back. I could actually sit down and fucking watch a gamer to and like follow it. I'm pretty excited. Oh, yeah. Well, I mean, do you think they'll make it through with no, with no stopages? What?

get through with no stoppages. What if he may be? I mean, if they don't have fans, then maybe. Why not? WWE's been going this whole time, and those are two dudes wrestling. Yeah, how is it that they've been able to, but they have had cases though pop up, though, right? Yeah, they've had cases in the locker room, for sure.

I don't know. I'm sure it's there. He's a billionaire, so he knows other billionaires, so he he just gets what he wants it's impossible for wrestlers to socially distanced while wrestling right absolutely just checking double check with Q he's the wrestling expert that's true they've changed things because I don't watch wrestling are they staying six feet apart with that I would that hurt the sport queue if they had to socially distance while wrestling? Yeah, I pantomiming. Thumb wrestling.

Yeah, but I would watch, I can't wait to watch a fucking ballgame. I don't know. I know it'll be weird when no fans in the stand, but I can't wait. What would you be a proponent for the suggestion that they want to pipe in fake crowd noise for the people at home? No, they actually do that on wrestling. It's very distracting. I wish they wouldn't do that. Why don't they put fake crowds in like shots of the crowds as if they're there, but it's really just from a different game.

That would be fucking awesome if they did that, but they used crowds from like the 70s and 80s. Yeah. From then and they cut to the crowd from there. That would be awesome. Yeah, why not? You think it was a different looking crowd back then. They say the crowds in the back in the day, one much more class year, you know, they dressed in their fedoras, and they wore suits to games.

No, the semides are talking like f... I mean, they're talking in the 1920s. They wore fur coats. I don't think New Yorkers in the 1970s were going to Yankee Stadiums in the Bronx in fucking suits and straw hats and for raccoon coats. Penets, they say team. Q, do you eat breakfast? I do.

I didn't use to. Why? I just wonder. No, nothing special. We know Walt doesn't. He's not a big breakfast guy. Did you get your magic spoon? What are you talking about Oh, did you get your magic spoon? What are you talking about you didn't get any magic spoon? Oh, I don't need I don't need oh I see you saying yes

Get magic got it. We got magic spoon is a sponsor did I get I got it? I got the magic spoon Is it being enjoyed in your in your household? Yeah, fucking love magic spoon, man. That shit showed up on that. Are you guys didn't even tell me it was coming? I started eating it. I was like, this is phenomenal. Four boxes of cereal.

Yeah. This is what we're talking about. Mary Beth said that her aunt is a diabetic. And without knowing that we were Pimpen magic spoon spoon she was raving on and on about how it saved her life because I guess she wanted sweet stuff but she couldn't afford to eat really sweet stuff so she had just ate magic spoon. Zero sugar 11 grams of protein and only three grams of carbs in each serving and they got four flavors cocoa

fruity, frosted and blueberry fruity was jam, that's what I liked. Honestly, Walt too good to be true. Keto friendly, gluten-free, grain-free, soy-free. What is in this stuff? GMO-free and low carbs. Magic spoon flavor, I already told you it's fruity. It's almost like fruity pebbles. Magic spoon is totally as well as all those other things like GMO and keto and gluten. What I do actually recommended, it was very good. I like two other cereals, but two of these I really like.

They were the fruity and the frosted, those I dug. So go to Magic Spoon. Frosty ones, would you like the frosty ones? I did, I liked the frosted ones. Go to Magic Spoon.com slash TESD to pick up a variety pack and try it today. Make sure to use the promo code TESD. Check out to get free shipping. And like so many other sponsors, they're so confident in their product. It's back with 100% happiness guarantee. So if you don't like it for any reason,

they'll refund your money. No questions asked. That's MagicSpoon.com slash TESD and use the code TESD for free shipping. We thank magic spoon for sponsoring the podcast. Thank you, magic spoon. That would be a good cartoon, don't you think? Like, like how that kid had the magic flute and study had the magic spoon. HR pop and stuff. Yeah. Jody was I was doing that. Cooks up heroin in his magic spoon. Yeah. He injects himself and then he goes on adventures. He does a speedball and he gets adventures

and then all the girls are like, woo! He gets real high jumps off a bridge, he gets laid. Is there an age where that ends, where the girl stopped being impressed with that shit? There has to be. Yeah, I think it's in their 50s. Oh yeah, Deb finally came around.

She's like, all right, I accept you in your lack of adrenaline. Because of menopause. Do you feel more mortal now than used to? Do you ever think about it? I don't really think about it now. I never think about that sort of thing because it's What's the point only it can only cause you to feel?

You know not in your best state of mind, you know to me, so I just like Power through any of those thoughts. I think about it and then it should like it all comes back to like then why Why why all this shit why what's it for? Oh, that's too deep I know I don't have the answers None of us have the answers to that shit But I do I sit there. I'm like and then I think about like you know Marybeth being so much younger I'm like after I fucking kick that bitch is gonna be partying on like fucking Wayne and Garth I don't like it. Yeah, but all that Tom Steve Dave's magic spoon. Oh my god fucking way in in Garth. I don't like it. Yeah, but all that tells you Dave's magic spoon. Oh my God.

People are gonna be driving my cars, they're gonna my house wearing my my my my meandies and eat my magic spoon. I mean if you really want the answer to those questions, I don't know how you really do though. Somebody can tell me? Well, yeah, I mean it's it's it's all about God. No. I know you don't want to hear it. No. I mean, I'll tell you what the answer is and you're like, and you're like, no. That's the easy answer that it's like, oh, it's just some heavenly dude who's just cast an judgment on you and you might go with you a fucking eternal torture because you did this and this. That's the way the guy is. He's so might. Oh, for me, it's definitely happening. Yeah, that's why I think I'm so worried Every day I'm like shit. It's a day closer

It's too late to be good Because that's the thing it's like people like people if they're being good for just uh some sort of divine reward queue Should they get into heaven? They're going for the wrong reasons. They told you what the deal was. They're doing it for the wrong reasons. No. I don't know. He didn't set up the rules. I mean, he was like, do this. You'll get in. He doesn't care about the reasons that well, like, say the 10 comments that he sent down to mo. Yeah. Yeah. He sent down the like, and if we don't listen, well, okay, we were told. I agree. I agree with you. Hold on. Let me and you were saying the same thing. Well, let me close my

Rosemagoan nude window to open up 10 command. You went to a Catholic school, right? You I did. Yeah, high school Catholic high school. You were taught all the all the things that you needed to learn. Uh, yeah, I went to Catholicism school. They drilled all that shit in my head for sure. Yeah, I don't believe any of it. You'll find your way back to that at some point or no. You think you've kind of just...

I mean, maybe when I'm older, I guess, you know, how they know how they say there you know There are no atheists in the trenches My fucking death bed then suddenly I'll be like you know god All right, so there's a couple of radicals son. There's a couple different translations of these 10 commandments, all right So I'll just go with this one. I am the larger god. You should not have strange gods before me now go with this one. I am the Lord your God, you should not have strange gods before me. Now, I don't think they mean a God like in the sense of like something holy, maybe as much as like something you worship, whether it be money or daredevilry, any sort of and he's sort of... You shall not take the Lord, the name of the Lord, your God and vain. That is too hard.

It's interesting that that is on the same list as that shall not kill. Yeah, you cannot murder people. You cannot say God damn it. And what do you think about the loophole, like this workaround that a lot of Southern people use, they say GD. Is that really a workaround? I mean, I don't think so. It's the same as saying, like, oh, N word, like it's like, you know what they're saying.

They say GD, but it's always GD. It's always GD. No, God damn it. Instead of saying God damn it, they'll say GD. Oh. Because they're like, oh, I didn't really say it I know I think God like I think God likes a little bit of ingenuity Oh, yeah, I think he might I think you might wink at that and be like all right you got well played well played Got me on that one

You know here's a couple extra little fucking years on your on your ticket. There you go Honor your mother and father. You honor your mom. Yeah, well, I mean, not this one's difficult to do for some people. It is. I mean, there's no if ands or buts about it. This one you may have you may have drawn the a card where it's impossible to honor them. Yeah, because they were so crappy. And whose fault is that? Not mine. Exactly. God. Hey, man, look, look in the mirror, bro. You're the one who set this shit up. Yeah, you put me here. Yeah. You can't kill. Never killed anybody. So have you ever, have you ever put on kill like you talk about murder and plus yeah I mean then you then you

talk about me paying for a borscht isn't it I did pay for it well that I mean the doctors don't go into hell not me it is it is it it is perfectly normal for humans to have homicidal thoughts right I just the people who act on them are the ones that like that don't have that fire wall between I want to kill this motherfucker to like I'm going to kill this motherfucker. I think it all is about context though if you're like having homicidal thoughts because you saw a pretty girl a fucking across the street while you're on a red light as opposed to a guy who fucker the street. All you're on a friend's light. As opposed to a guy who fucking re-rends you. Because you're staring at that girl for too long and you get no argument with that guy.

It's all about context though. If you're just thinking about just chopping that girl up into little itty-be pieces, yeah, that's not normal. That is weird. That's I didn't think about that. Which I guess is a good thing. I was thinking about the guy who re-rends me, pissing me off so much.

I like, I want to kill this guy good thing. I was thinking about the guy who re-rends me pissing me off so much I like I'm gonna kill this guy. I never even considered. Well even in the range of homicidal thoughts there has to be a normal range and then a fucking creeping towards that fucking moral firewall thing where somebody's like that asked for the good slice stuff in my fireplace. I mean I have to admit I have thought that before but the murdering of a girlfriend But certainly not displaying it would be hiding instead Oh shit, you I don't know see can you back out of any of these like if you've already committed this sin Are you done for no?

You can always a tone. That's the greatest thing about what this what he set down Like none of this shit matters at the last second, but sorry Yeah, everybody's a sinner and as long as you really truly Go on Bettany and and say you're sorry and take and take the The love and the whatever all the other Luzor slamazzle with it. Mm-hmm. You're fucking All right, uh, you're fucking it. All right, you can't commit adultery,

that's the next one. Well, you guys were never married. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. All right, so, so she's the adulterer. I'm not the adulterer. She is. She's the adulterer.

Yeah. So both people aren't the, all right. Whew, that's one less I got to worry about. Yeah. You can't steal. all right. Whew. That's one less I got to worry about. Yeah. You can't steal. Everybody's done it. Everybody's done it. I steal ladies hearts on the reg.

Does that count? It does not. No, okay, good. Yeah, I can't tell you the last time I stole something, but I've definitely stolen shit in my life. Of course. Everyone's taking something. I regret it. I kinda regret it.

I wish I hadn't done it. I stole the Sunday fucking newspaper the other day. Did you really? Yeah. The on purpose or? Yeah, it was on purpose. I put it at the bottom of the cart knowing that the guy probably wouldn't even see it.

That's as I put all my groceries on here. Cause I was like fucking two dollars and 50 cents on this paper. It's insane. There's no way it should cost as much. I agree. But I feel that way about every item in the cart. So I just want to push it out the door. They're struggling to stay in business. Print media. That is the last breath. Oh my God. I'm fucked in news anyway. It's all bullshit. You should be stealing it

Buy for the new for the sale papers. You can oh yeah for the circulars Yeah, I presented the circular to Mary Beth and she's like this out of my face. I was like oh Sorry, I didn't know we were so wealthy. We can't fuck you got magic food. I know It was like let me do the shop. But we should cut coupons together. Yeah, we could do like one of those super coup hunters where like, we make money. All we got to do is fill the whole house with shit

we don't need. You can't bear false witness against your neighbor. Don't you know what that means? I don't know either. This is basically don't lie. Don't you know what that means? I don't know either. Doesn't basically don't lie. Don't lie about someone. I think that's just like, you know, don't bear for false witnesses, not just lying.

Yeah, like don't lie about people, don't lie about shit in general. Well, it says against your neighbor. I don't think they mean like your neighbor, like the dude next door. Yeah, this is the hardest one of all, though, for people to, you know, because... I don't think they mean like your neighbor neighbor like the dude next door Though for people to you know because people lie every day little white lies lying to ourselves right now. Yeah I lied about that newspaper. I really instilled newspaper Q

You're still in as much trouble You want to cook or water something? I'm? Where I did steal that newspaper. You want to cook or water something? No, I'm good. I did steal that newspaper. I think everybody knows that. I forgot that they were struggling. Say you know, love. I'm going to go pay for it on the way home.

Yeah, they'll be like, wait, what? Just stay right here. You can't covet your neighbor's wife. Have you found yourself doing that? You have any neighbors with hot wives? I do actually and I got to say that's out of my control. I can't not look it. You can look. Some eye candy. Well, that is not coveting. Isn't that it? Like you look at it and you're like, oh yeah. If you think anything about it while you're looking. No, I think it's okay to think it. I think it's, I think it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's You admitted your earn or possess to have something so you're like damn. I wish I could have her to

I don't feel that way, but I have I've neighbor when attractive wife from my cool shit. She looks good But I think neighbors Neighbor just means like your fellow man. So before you Committed adultery without adulterer. You were coveting right your neighbor's wife Oh, that's for sure. Yeah, but those are the bit of the battle days man This is an all-new queue. What turned you around? God I Think the fire like I think turning 30 like getting into the fire department and just being like oh man

I don't have to fucking dip myself into the ugly side of the world Anymore I could just try and fucking be a good person. Did you just say when you turn 30? Yeah, I think so. I remember it being a little later than that. I remember still living in LA. Well, I was living in LA in my late 20s. Yeah, no, I was. I had gone back. Right. You were in the fire department and I remember you coming out to LA and explaining a situation to me. Yeah, I mean, I didn't say it was perfect, but I mean, I'd say that was not the time. I mean, it's been early 30s though, like thinking about it probably 30s. I don't think I turned 30 and it switched off.

I mean, that, that, that sort of time frame is when I started really changing as a person. I think the fire department just straighten me out all the way, not all the way. But I think there's people who are listening right now who may be coveting. And there's like things you can do, like to make up for those thoughts. Like, you know, you could like that. I think there's self-flagulation. But I think that that is something that like that you can do if you're feeling impure thoughts about, you you know about your neighbor's wife I mean you could do some sort of like it doesn't have to be like like you know like draw blood But like just maybe just punch yourself in the face

Are you talking to me or no? Not doing any of this. No, I didn't mean you. I said people are listening who maybe who are maybe in that boat doll right now I got you Punch yourself in the face maybe who are maybe in that boat door right now. I got you. Punch yourself in the face. I'm not a tooth loose, but not out. Right. Unless you keep doing it.

Then you got to take yourself more seriously. I think that's how kind of losses for two front teeth. That's a full noodle coming his neighbor's wife. I don't know. I look around at the wives on my block, and I don't feel like there's much to cover it personally. I'm not into it, you know. So I'm clear. I don't think it literally means literally your neighbor. I think it just, your, any man is your neighbor. Right. So if I'm coveting somebody's wife secretly. Yeah,

you're probably God knows. Alright. Uh, and then the last one is you can't covet your neighbor's goods. Now how fucking hard is that to somebody has something that you're like, damn, that's really cool. I wish I had the money for it. Like, why should you fucking be in trouble for that? Well, I mean, because

you should be happy with what God has given you. You can give me shit. It gave you life. Uh, okay. Oh, thanks. Oh, thanks. He's giving you a piece of a way. He had a better date. He's giving you this beautiful world, man.

He's giving you the stars, the moon, the, you know, the churros, the grass, the protest. Yeah, but that asshole next door gets to see all that. And I'm gonna say he's been. Yeah. He gets asshole next door gets to see all that number. Say he's been. Yeah He gets to look at it from his convertible bends Yeah, fuck that guy. It's hard. I mean this was look if it was easy Everybody be up and having mm-hmm. It's gotta be it's gotta be a challenge Don't you think that that also is something that's got like you guys don't actively look at what other people have in life

I'd be like I want that anymore, right? Like that's, that goes away too. Yeah, I'd say from time to time, I would be like, wow, it would be really cool to have that. Not in a way that like, I deserve it, but it's like something that is out of my price range, but I'm like, that would be cool though. Or I drive by a really nice home and I'm like, man, what is that guy have to do to own this home? I would love to own a home beyond

impractical jokers you know I think that's just now I think everybody does I this is one of the hardest ones to like break the habit of doing this yeah you live in a crooked house and you fucking drive by a nice house trust me thoughts start swirling in your head that you don't mind going to help for Trust me thought starts swirling in your head that you don't mind going to hell for Yeah, but but I to me that that doesn't mean the same thing to me I think you're not looking at that like oh fuck I got a perfectly good house, but I want that house for no reason because just because he has it You're saying I want a house, you know that structurally sound. I don't think that that's coveting your neighbors I don't think that that's coveting your neighbors. I don't think that's like being jealous.

You're like just being like, hey man, it would be nice to have a fucking house that doesn't lean to the left. I think that if you moved into a nice house, and then some other fucker built a bigger house next door, and you were like, well now I gotta build my house bigger. I think that's kind of what it means. Then you're covered, right?

Like it doesn't mean just accept what of a shit you get in life, and don't try and, I never would have moved out of my apartment if that was the best. Well, no, no, I don't think it means you can't improve your station or you can't improve the things that you have. There's no, there's no nothing wrong with that, but I guess like try to appreciate what you do have the more than you, you know, resent what you don't't have I think that may be the message I could be wrong no. I don't I don't disagree with that I just I when I meant I guess was not that don't you find you don't want to improve your station life I guess what I meant is like you don't look at other people jealousy and.

see and anchor depends depends if like let's say if someone if you're sick right now and you and you see somebody who's like a real piece of shit and they're healthy you can be like well right. You know I this was the most difficult one of all because I would think that like, it's just human nature like to resent and to feel like you want, you know what somebody else has. I don't know if it's human nature, but it's very, very difficult. I think also with the coveting the neighbor's wife, it's a matter of, and I know that you've done this Q.

I think a lot of guys do this. And even if you're in a relationship and you don't have any interest in the girl, you look at a girl with a guy and you're like, that guy? Trust me, I know he named it me. I mean, I know for a fact. But even as a regular guy,

like sometimes you look at a girl that you consider attractive and you look at the guy, you're like, him? Yeah, but sometimes you look at guys like that and I'm like, good for him, man, I'm glad that's going on in the world, you know, that's a good attitude If I see like but I'm talking about like if you saw like a like a like a like a fat dude with like a like a super model I would be like good good for them. I'm happy with I'm happy about that I'm not talking about like a fucking asshole douchebag that you like fuck this fucking guy. He's an oyer

Yeah, not even that but you know how like these people you meet that are just kind of like off-putting Yeah either arrogant or they're whatever That I'm just like that guy's a dickhead, he doesn't deserve it But like in terms of mismatched out of their league shit, I always applaud the guys or girls that get people that are Some would say out of their league. I like that. If they can manage it. Good. Yeah. I've managed it. I've done it. You know what I mean? You're going to lose any elite sometimes. Exactly what you mean. Yeah. So you know, you

got a root for the end of dogs like Walt said. You got it right? Who the fuck roots for the winners? Yankee fans. Oh, not for a while, bro. I mean, it's been, you know, it's been a bit, but yeah, yeah. Q, what kind of underpants you got on? I mean, on these fuck. Yeah. You need all your stuff down there protected. And that's what they're good at. Mjandis protecting your genitalia's so they have soft and then soft sustainable undies and fun prints like back to the future and lots of colors so you can be comfy being you and that's what's important these days being you not everyone else's expectation of you. Let's see right now it said they

are asking what underwear are you wearing at this very moment does a few of them not going to read that part this very moment me on these i got my panda prints on how much more fun would it be would you be having right now if your andes recovered in up pandas or sushi roles until you have an abal so yes you're right do you guys feel your underpants define you as a person?

Like you stripped down If you got saggy fucking tidy whiteies with a yellow fucking stain in the front But this goes against oh being you though because well, that was my question. They didn't ask that Because this goes against the very Talking points that like you should you shouldn't be defined by what you wear. Underneath you got a right like you you're you're with a girl stripping down and instead of me undies. She's got grandma fucking. She's got a big old period panties on. And like it changes nothing. What's that? Oh, it changes nothing. My goal is to have them off no matter what. Oh!

Go to hell, cute. Yeah, it's all be worth it. I'll see you there. You can get a Mjundi's membership and systematically replace the shoddy underpants you're wearing now. A Mjundi's membership is a monthly subscription that sends new pairs right to your door

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I don't think that's what they're referring to, but they're not saying what half of you is better saying, like, you never heard that like your wife is your better half, like this is my better half, yeah. Oh, I see. You met like like at the belly button up is my better belly button down, which is my better half. You know, as crazy as people are like laughing as I said that, but yeah, I think that's great.

With this mug and these fucking choppers, it's still my better half than what's down below. Because you're counting your feet. You're counting your feet. Well, I'm counting there. It's the whole fucking package. More lack of it. See, my better half is belly button below.

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10 commandments Ten Commandments. Yes. But here's a feel good story I saw a dedicated dog trek 60 miles to get back to her old home. Oh my God, I love stories like this. Cleo the canine. Trek 60 miles from her new home in Kansas to her old home in Missouri, where she hasn't lived for nearly two years. She had to cross a river, either the Kansas or Missouri,

or maybe both to make her way back. She's a four-year-old Labrador, and she settled in on the house as front porch, startling the family who lives there now. So basically, they went to the vet, they checked her for a microchip and figured out that she belonged to the people

that lived there two years before. I swear to God, dog dogs should run the world. They're better than us. How does a dog do that? I don't know because they're smart. They're smart and they got a great sense of smell but mother fucker two years. You plotted your escape two years as a dog and then finally you're like this is it. I might have to cross two rivers but fucking I'm getting back home And then they go cats do it. Yeah, remember that movie far from home. Yeah, yeah with the dog and I was at two dogs in a cat or two cats in a dog Yeah, I think it was two dogs in a cat Michael J. Fox I don't remember that that shit will fucking They should play that in fucking jails

To calm the prisoners down just on a loop You think that's what would do it? I'm gonna work They should play that in fucking jails to calm the prisoners down just on a loop. You think that's what we do. I'm gonna work. I'm telling you, man, like when the shit's getting volatile in there and they're like, they're like, they're talking about, I mean, we may have a ride on our hands, pop in fucking far from home and far from home part two, even though it wasn't that's good as part one. They got lost again.

They think I lost the second time. Maybe they're not as smart as we can. They got lost again. Fox is one of the voices Let's see The 90s Michael J. I remember you talking about took my I took my It was at homeward bound wall. Yeah, I'm word bound. That's it. Yeah, homeward bound incredible journey. Yeah Well, you took them to the theaters to see it must Must've been second run. This came out in 93. You sure you didn't go alone? No, no, no. I took my wife to say, both you and my wife.

Oh, I took her wife. Yeah, this was the one where I was thinking about proposing to her after this. Oh, after this one? Yeah, because it was all. Is it sad or happy? Oh, it's so, it's sad and happy all at once. And is happy? I guess it's not like...

Yeah, all the end is... Yeah, it's a trial. It's not like fucking old y'all are in shit. Yeah, what was it called? Oh guess it's not like... Yeah, all the end is... It's not like fucking old Yeller and shit. Oh, it's three dogs. Homeward bound. Yeah, it's three dogs, no cats. Oh wait, no, it looks like there is a cat. A little...

No, it's not a cat. Sally Field does a smart mouth Himalayan cat. Okay. You ever saw it, Q? I did see it. I saw it, you know, at some point. I know at some point I didn't know I don't know Where they made a homeward bound to lost in San Francisco. Oh boy You don't want to get lost in San Francisco. No, you don't know what's gonna go on

That's you'll have to say anymore. No, no, no, follow up. Everybody knows. Sure there is. I don't know. You get trouble for that, right? I mean, it's who would get trouble for that? You said nothing. Yeah.

All right, Tom Steve Dave. All right, Tom Steve Dave.