Tell Em Steve-Dave - #469: Qovid

Episode Date: February 6, 2021

Walt visits the post office. Bry and Walt consider a plowing business and reminisce about an old job.

You're gonna come here and give me a hand job. Hi guys, how are you doing? Am I doing this right? A lot of people must be poppin' boners. They don't ever come. Tell them, Steve Dave. Hello and welcome to this week's edition of Tell them Steve Dave. I'm here with Walt. Hey. And, uh, Q, barely hanging on.

Look at this guy. We're watching him on Zoom and, uh, he looks, uh, he looks a mess. Yeah, I've, I've felt better, man. Um, yeah, this is weird. Like, just, nor, like, I've been feeling pretty good all day today, but something happened the last hour. I moved around too much or something. So now I'm a little dizzy and a little nauseous. Yeah, you're still pulling through and doing the show.

Yeah, you know, I love the ants. I know how upset they be if they didn't get to tell them Steve Dave and how upset I'd be if I didn't get to do one. So I said, fuck it man. Let's do it. You really you really look good though. I was expecting you know Tom Hanks filled off here on you when I went. I went up to zoom eating. But you look really good though. Yeah, you know, I didn't really change my physical being all that much. Yeah, you know, I didn't really change my physical being all that much. It's just, I just sleep a little bit more. Tell us what happened, tell us how BQ came down with COVID. A fragrant mask.

Yeah, no, I didn't, I fucked up. I went to a store. I went in this store, wore my mask the whole time, and that't, I fucked up. I went to a store. I went in this store, wore my mask the whole time, and that's really the only option. You brought it on yourself. I was a fucking idiot, I went to a store. You know? It's only me you haven't gone into a store since last March.

This is the first time you've been in a store since, in, in a year. Almost a year. No, I've been to, I've been to a couple of stores here or there, but but just for like groceries and stuff like that. So it hasn't but for the most part I get that delivered. So I haven't had much reason to be in stores. This is probably maybe the fourth store I've been into since March.

Because you said, when you told us that you got it, you said I went into a store. And you seem very confident that you got it, you said I went into a store and you seemed very confident that you got it because of going into the store. Is there somebody who looks sick in the store? Like what makes you think that that was the reason? Just because there's no other possibility. That's it. I mean, I didn't even get gas to the store.

It was literally like from my house, got out, went in, got back in my car, came home, that's it. I mean, unless I courted off an Amazon package, it's some shit like that, but that seems really unlikely. Yeah. Um, fuck a moor, bro, I need to the couch. I've been sitting on this fucking couch. I've been sitting on this fucking couch for a year now. I finally broke it. It's like I got a divot in it for my fucking badass. It's like the cats, it just smells like sick cats now. So it's like, I gotta get a new couch. I can't live out the rest of this pandemic.

We're gonna be locked indoors for another fucking year. I need a couch. So I was like, all right, let me go sit on this couch before I order it online. That was it. I need an appointment to get in this store. There are only three or four people in store the whole time. We all wore masks the entire time and I was in and out in 20 minutes. You know, when you said store for some reason, I assumed a grocery

store. It was a furniture store. Yeah. It was an Allen. No, you wanted to kick her. I ended up not even getting the fucking couch. But if we didn't fuck up a burrow, our relationship with burrow, I'm sure we could have gotten you a couch in the mail. But we burned that bridge, bad. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Now look at the cost of that. Were you...

No, I don't. Yeah. But were you... What was your anxiety level when you found out you tested positive? Well what happened is Wednesday night. I was I was watching TV and then suddenly my head started spinning and I I ran up and I got up and I ran to the bathroom. I threw up.

There's the last Wednesday and I was like, fuck, I'm getting sick. I'm like, but how? Well, look, I didn't. My first thought wasn't COVID because everything I was here is breathing and stuff like that. I don't know. I was having stomach issues.

That's not typical of COVID. But I was like, all right, let me see how it goes. And then that was Wednesday, Thursday. I was feeling sick all day. It was dizzy, it was exhausted, getting tired, moving. And we're supposed to shoot in Prattal Jokers this week that we're in now. So I might throw it a little shot in now. And I have to get tested before we shoot. And I was like, man, this doesn't feel like it's gonna go that well and I got tested and sure enough, I came back that I have the COVID. And I've been spared really any breathing issues, which has been really good.

Mainly what I've been dealing with is just fucking consistent pounding. My head hurts all the time. And then if I push it now too much, I get dizzy. You know, you start getting better and better and I was doing all right. But then I get upstairs. I was like, I just went out to my car to get something

and I fucking headspin and just from that. But if I sit on my ass, I feel pretty good. Huh, you couldn't have had a hell and go get a coach for you, a personal shopper or you just wanted to you wanted to test it out You just want to sit on that you know, I mean, I think we're gonna be sitting on that couch for next one another year of our lives We're not going anywhere So I wanted to sit on it make sure it was like

This deficiencies in the couch I have now there's a reason you don't I mean the neck the neck hide isn't high enough It's not so the it's a little too Formless on the back and you always got to beat the pillow with the shape I mean the neck the neck height isn't high enough. It's not so the it's a little too Formless on the back and you always got to beat the pillow with the shape. I've been living with this a man in my stature Right for a year now. It's now at rage. I can't have it. It's an hour. It's a moral outrage And I just you know when I got so when I got it my first thought was like Thank God that I haven't been one of these preachy motherfuckers. That's like God a world gotta wear a mask. Wear a mask. Like, you're in a unit. If you don't wear a man, like, thank God I've not been that guy that's just like preaching to people how to

live their fucking lives because I would look like such a fucking dickhead right now. Well, it'd be even worse if you were like, oh man, masks are bullshit. Well, no, if you say master bullshit and then you get it, like at least everybody sees that coming, you know the right. But if you're like the type of person that wears a mask everywhere, and you're also a little bit righteous about it, like a little holier than now about that mask wearing. And then they get it anyway, even I would laugh at that.

I'd be like, I fuck that asshole, preachy motherfucker. Yeah. Did you have any, I like to think I at that. I'd be like, I fucked that asshole. Preachy motherfucker. Yeah. Did you have any? I like to think I avoided that. Did you have any, like, you know, because I mean, this is no joke. This is a serious, this is, you know, it's, we've seen how the, had deadly this,

this can be where you're worried that, because I was worried when you got, when you texted and told us because I'm like You know you there are no like guarantees It seems like it like seemingly healthy people can be you know put into a coma feels like if not worse Yeah, I was I had moments like that But wasn't like because the thing is I got tested on the third day that I was feeling shitty So I was already at least three days into having it by the time is I got tested on the third day that I was feeling shitty. So I was already

at least three days into having it by the time that I got the positive. And I was like, okay, so I'm at least three days in, maybe four days in, and I have no long issues whatsoever. I was like, that's a pretty good sign, you know what I mean? They don't just like skyrocket out of nowhere, usually have long issues early on. So I felt confident I was avoiding that stuff, but what was it? So Friday, so Sunday was the worst day, and my head was pounding, pounding.

And I was so dizzy and I was just lying on my side. And I got really worried then, only because of the brain issues that I've had already, like the stroke and stuff like that. I was like, oh my God, I was like, what if this is affecting the already weakened structure by brain and some of this happens? And that was scary.

I had a few hours where I was kind of talking myself out of that, but other than that one really bad day, it's been kind of like a bad cold. Now, are you the type of guy who likes to be baby when you're sick? No, what's your definition of baby? I'm gonna lay it on my hand and put it, you know, like, you know, come stroke my hair. Oh, no, no,ness is a sign of weakness. You're hiding it. I can hide that shit. So, so you're gonna get tested again on Monday?

Uh, one minute, I said, um, I don't know. I think 10 days after, no it's got to be next Friday. Oh, yes, on Monday. Yeah, you're right, Monday. 10 days after my first test. Now, you're not the first resident of Tellum's Steve Dave town to have, we haven't, we haven't mentioned it on any of the podcast because I'm a believer in luck. And I don't wanna like, I kinda like knock on wood. I don't want to like you know, I kind of like knock on wood

I didn't want to talk about anybody who got sick Because you know I didn't you wasn't sure You know, you might jinx them. Yeah, you might jinx them when I found out that they they had it It's actually two residents of Talon Steve Dave town have been stricken and no one knows it You want to live on field? Yeah, I'm going to reveal it right now. Tim, the record star clerk has recovered fully. Oh, survivor. And um, Sarge L.E. team. I got a call from Sarge L.E. team. Um, he was close to being pronounced dead. He told me and he came back to life.

I'm not getting around. Now Tim didn't see anything of the sort, right? Tim isn't given to hyperbole like Sargell. Sargell, apparently, was a really bad shape because he's got diabetes. And he said he went through the ringer and he told me some stuff that like I mean, I couldn't tell you because you had already when you told me you had it There was nothing that I could I could tell you that would help you Um, it would only scare you what he told me But he said that this is not a natural germ

Oh boy, he said it's definitely bioengineered and it's structured to kill you within two days. And if you make it past two days, you'll be all right. There you go. So we're going to put that in your pipe and smoke it. So by his theory, everybody that died of COVID died in the first 48 hours. Are we doing overkill? This is why I don't want to bring it up because you guys are reputable part of the He's saying shit that we all know isn't true for a fact. He definitely had it and he was take he got it by going into the VA fact. He definitely had it.

And he was take he got it by going into the VA hospital. He told me he had to go in for some checkups. He got home from the hospital, got sick and he had to go right back. And he said that they it was touching go.

He was a really, really bad shape. And he called me. He called me about a week after he recovered and he said, you still not feel well, but we spoke on the phone for about 45 minutes. Oh my God. Yeah, really.

Yeah. That's how he was spending the last of his two days talking to Walt. I will the vortex to you. Yeah. I mean, it's, it's, it's serious. Shitty told me and he told me, you know, don't treat it as a joke. This shit is real and he, he told us that he told me that he was hoping that all of us would escape this and I have to deal with.

He tell up and unfortunately, you, you, you went to a furniture store and didn't listen to the Sarge L. I mean, I definitely got milder symptoms in Sarge L, not on the brink of anything. It may be the diabetes though. Good, but when you hear these symptoms, you and I both believe that we had it at one point. I mean, even with Q getting it now, because I know you said you thought you also had had it before. I mean, I could have, it would have been about a year. It could have, I could have lost a muni in the in-corder again. It still hasn't shaken my firm belief that I've had it already. You know, again, who knows? I mean, it's just my gut, but, you know,

I adjust my gut a lot. It doesn't usually betray me. But a lot of, uh, it's sore as hell, too. It was gastronomically, too. I should have a six pack. My watch board abs. No, they're still flabby itself, but they, they hurt as if they should be six packs. as if they should be six packs. Yeah, I believe that that I had it as well. Cause when I hear his symptoms, I'm like, check, check, check, like all that shit. And did you lose some weight, Keele? I know you were trying to shed a couple LBs.

This is helpful, isn't it? No, this is this is one of the weirdest symptoms that I've had with this. Went back to your oranges. You have an appetite for COVID? Dude, like not only was I queasy, I was also ravenously hungry. It's crazy. I don't know how to explain it.

Like, my stomach would feel unsettled and sick, but I'd be like, I gotta have an English muffin. But it was weird. It was a fucking really weird thing. So I didn't gain any, muffin, but it was weird. It was fucking really weird thing So I didn't gain any but I didn't lose any it's kind of been a net It's a net zero at this point. No, would you puke it back up? Or no, no, I really didn't puke. Yeah, I didn't puke past that one night Hi fever. I was able to kind of

Never never fever at all. Really? Yeah, that's very unusual right? Because how do you how does your body kill and the virus that without that high fever to kill it right? Yeah. No fever, but pounding headache is if I feel like I have a fever, but I don't. Pounding headache. Dizziness, queesiness, those are really the main things and exhaustion, man.

Like, if I go up the flight of this, like, that's the weird thing. Like, I can go up a flight of stairs at noon and I'll be perfectly fine. And then I, two hours later, I'll go up and when I get up, I'll just be like a little dizzy and out of breath. It's weird. It's a weird fucking thing, man. But you feel you're on the other side of it now? Yeah, I think so. I'm feeling, if I didn't move as much as I do, I think today would have I would have been like feeling like, oh, definitely, I'm okay.

Yeah. Um, at least sitting there. So I'm on the right side of it. I'm lucky. I still I didn't lose taste. I didn't lose smell. And that's what a lot of guys in the firehouse lost that, um, and still haven't gotten it back. So that was a big fear of mine. It's like a kind of a taste of the orange again.

I said that would be. Yeah. I think all in all, I've been pretty lucky with this. That is good news to hear. I'm glad to hear that you're not, you know, you're feeling better. Yeah, unlike you and I, Walt, you got out of shovel and snow. Well, sick.

But for us, I know lucky fuck.'s like my whole arm is fucked now. My shoulder like with that pinched nerve. And then, you know, I get up and these fucking cocksuckers, these, uh, plow guys, they just plow it right back where I fucking just dug it from. But now it's like, we live so close to the water that a lot of times were right on that freezing rain and snow line. So it was snow and snow and snow at the very end, it started to freeze a little bit, or start to rain a little bit and then it fucking freezes. Now you've got rock hard fucking ice.

You're trying to chip through so the goddamn mailman will come to your house. But when you tap that, my boy sons, they're, they sound different now. When you hit the table with your face, I don't know if that did anything. I think it did. I can hear you better now. All right. It's like the funds and show over here. Yeah, this, this snow was a little much. It was it nice for you, Q. Did you sit there and watch it? I did. I sat in, you know, I got that little area off the back of the house. It's mostly the glass wall.

I just, yeah, I just went there and like just sat there and bundled up and watching it fall. That's a nice little sitting area. Yes, my favorite part of the house. Yeah, call it the clubhouse. Yeah. Walt and I shoveled like a couple of bitches. And I mean, there are no, here's the thing. Kids don't come around anymore. Like, remember when we were young you grab a shovel you make a couple bucks Yeah, that is are gone. They're they're a long gun. It's not that way anymore man

Well, we we scared it's you know to not walk up the stranger's houses and knocking their doors and ask him You know to buy magazines or shovel, you know their walkways You know we put the fear of God into them that every single person is a fucking child molester. I hadn't thought of that. You're right. That never even occurred to me that like, I'm not gonna walk up to some stranger's house

and be like, hey, can you give me money? Like, yeah, it's just like they might get snatched and pulled into the house or something. I had it even occurred to me. I mean, I was just like, these kids are fucking lazy, motherfucker, so I was so annoyed, these kids are fucking lazy motherfuckers. I was so annoyed. I was so annoyed that nobody came by.

And then I was like, I wish I knew like, I had an inside track with like a plow guy, you know? Like one of these guys, like, who has the plow. Work your fucking podcast fucking fame magic. I mean, you gotta be able to pull some, some like weight when get me and you. Right, both of us. Not just you.

My friend and I, our abs are killing us. Save you and get us. You know, you guys could just, you could just call up a fucking service and book them. They don't ever come. I did it. I did it, you know, I've tried it over and over again. I like, I lock somebody down in the summertime. And then they fucking never show up because they get a bigger job a more expensive paying job my it's just too

I don't know I could I called my guy two days before the storm. I was like I'm gonna need you here. Yeah, but you got twice he came You you got a fucking spiraling driveway. It's a it's a big job. You're not paying that guy 20 bucks. No, but so what? That means you just got to pay someone the money to get them in there. Because if you get $500 from some sort of like store, or you know,

So pay him 500 bucks. Hahaha. Hahaha. We're looking to do, looking to cut 20 in between both of us. I remember back in the 80s. The guys services, which are specialists and needed by everybody at that exact moment, and you want to get a football can pace in the crisis.

It's gotten so bad. I've been hurt and so much if you're doing this. I've been thinking about like buying my own like bleed. What's that thing that they put on the front of the truck? Oh, the plow. Yeah. You're gonna put it on the Prius. I'm gonna put it on the Prius. And just hold on to it because it would only it would take me like four or five like up and down on the driveway and I'd be done. And maybe I could do my neighbors and maybe I could come over and do a prize if he throws me a 10. Yeah. Oh, I got a nice friend.

Friend, friend price. 1980s pricing for friends. Yeah, really. You don't want that because then you got to then you got to hook it up. Then you got to store it when you're not using it. Why can't I just keep it on during the summer though? Well, you guess mileage alone will eat into. Really, it's just too heavy.

Yeah. Because I see people, but that is it. So it's not dragon. It wouldn't be like I'd be driving around in the middle of the summer. Sparked everywhere. I would know enough to raise it. You know what they cost us, cost us tons. Those blades.

Yeah, those fucking things cost big bucks. I looked into it. Yes. Thousands. It's like fucking take three. Just pay the guy. Oh my god. Wait, you were really gonna try to hook it to a four-cylinder priest?

Why would it not work? Absolutely not. Why? Because you would need four-wheel drive and probably like an eight cylinder. Like those trucks that use them, those pickup trucks, have you ever seen one on a car? Ever. I have not, but I just thought that it was just because they can't. Nobody could afford it. I think I have four wheel drive. You probably have all wheel drive. Yeah. Yeah. I think my Prius could fucking. You probably have all wheel drive. Yeah.

I think my Prius could fucking... I could probably pull itself through the snow. All I got to do is just do my little driveway. That's all. I don't give a fuck about everybody else. You're just set. You're gonna do more driveways for $10. You're making it $10?

It's gonna have to raise those prices. When I look at the cost of those fucking plows, yeah, I might not be able to do your driveway price. It's went up. Damn. It could be Lord Man with a sweet price. Fucking Beijing sweet mother fucker. I could come up and do yours.

If I buy it, would you get rid of your guy? Yeah, I'd do that. You let me have the job? Yeah, but he does like the walkway around the house like surrounding the house That's not a plow job. That's a hand job You're gonna come here and give me a hand job. I gotta do that too Do you know yeah, do you need me there immediately after it snows or can it be like a couple days later? Because you know I got it. It's not that close to statin on

This he comes he comes halfway through the storm and then after the storm. Oh my god. You're paying this guy. You got him on retainer. Yeah, like to be honest like for this guy and your driveway. I've only had to use them once. I was the first time I've used them, but I knew I knew who to reach it. Yeah, what's his price? What are you paying? It was. I think it was 650 I paid him You're 10% of the way to apply That is a lot I didn't know you could make that kind of money He uses a snowblower It's like four guys come with snow plows. Right. We should just open up a plow business and just hire a bunch of people with plows. Look at Mr. Plow. Yeah. Plow kick. Yeah, but but I had him do I had him do the whole the whole property not just the driveway up to the thing. They were there for like

two hours. What if I do it for five and I don't do the whole driveway? Like I just do the driveway, none of this walkway shit. Right, you're not walking your sick. You're not allowed out of the house anyway, Q. Yeah, no. I mean, I'd rather just get the whole thing done. Just stay home. Okay.

He's a fucking tricking violet this guy. As I wrote the other day on Twitter, I was like, who's the potato chip now? That's the shit you should not be doing. Oh, I went out again, didn't I? Oh, I think it's a loose. That was okay. Yeah, there you go. If that's the stuff you can't be doing, you can't be tempting fate like that by going, who's the potato chip now?

It's the next thing I'm like, you. Oh, you. You should your pants. Because I should my pants. Yeah, you're right. I'll jinx myself and then you're gonna go. I need to not do're shit like that man. That's bad karma. Oh, I'm not if you do it to your friends. Oh, if I'm saying it should be strangers and shit. Yeah, if you're busing your friends balls, I don't think that weighs into the karma. Oh, I think

universe. I think karma is blind like lady justice, bro. That boy boy you think not not between bros I don't know I think that I think that only applies to that bros whole shit and I think it brought replaced applies to Carmano no but the reason he's saying it is because it's funny he's not saying because he means it true but still man I wouldn't you know what you do you do what you want right I'm gonna hear over here telling you I'm gonna live on the hear over here telling you I'm gonna live on the one Bet you when you get a snow days like a couple snow days in a row like this I guarantee pregnancies increase because people are getting down

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units fly off the show yeah units there was a little bit of a debacle in our advertising recently yeah you remember Mac Weldon Weldon? They were the clothing company that have those awesome sweats. Yeah, yeah, yeah, what happened? Well, Mary Beth gets a frantic call from the advertising agency because a certain person for Brian Quinn called up asking for sweatpants. What are these people? Did you call the advertising agency called back welding directly? Or email them? I'm sorry. It was a ledge. I don't even know what you're talking about. It was a ledge that someone from your camp was looking for free sweatpants and they were like, hey, what's that code? And they emailed not the advertising agency and not Mary Beth, but they

actually emailed Mac Weldon. Mac Weldon was upset. The advertising agency was not Mary Beth, but they actually emailed Mac Weldon. Mac Weldon was upset. The advertising agency was upset, and I'm listening to it on speaker phone. I'm just saying to Mary Beth, I was like, there's no fucking way. Brian Quinn or anyone representing Brian Quinn said, I want some free sweatpants.

I mean, I definitely didn't come for me. And also it was, it was, Frank, didn't come from me. And also it was Frank. It was also spelled Brian Queen. So I'm not, I didn't even get that right. But people were, people, it was like they were a buzz with Mac Weldon. Mac Weldon, why would they, why would they angry? No, I think they, they weren't angry.

They were upset because whoever was alleging that they were from your camp started getting like when they were like you can't have just free sweatpants They started getting real rude and unprofessional with them. Like that was our that was our first clue that it might not have been him. Oh, that's really weird. What a what a weird scam. It's odd right Yeah, wow I also want to read you an email sage turned 15 dude. Oh That is fucking crazy Yeah, and she lords it over me

She's like next year. I'm gonna be 16 16, then 18, I'll be adult. And I call this other shit. I'm like, all right. Well, but she's been, she's been going to virtual school for the past couple of days because of the snow and shit. Yeah. And the other day she was, you know, she, she normally gets dressed, but the other day she was tired and she just wanted to stay in her pajamas. And to me, I'm like, is that a thing that, like, because girls go to fucking restaurants in their pajamas, you know? Like, so it didn't occur to me that her being in her pajamas was a big deal. But evidently, it was. Right. So this is an email I got from the band director from her school. We had an issue

today. The less urgent portion is that sage was in pajamas, a few other students were as well, and I will speak to them because district policy states that students should be dressed appropriately for school, even if attending remotely. But during the last song we were listening to in class on YouTube, sage was dancing. This is something she does to the music frequently in class

and dancing is fine. As you may be aware, on a fully virtual school day, everyone is on camera, and I'm thinking she may have forgotten about that. Well, dancing in a job. I think I think I know it is a goal, huh? Right. Yeah. It's going the way of the pool in a long. Let's see. While dancing in her pajamas at home, she lifted up her pajama top, exposing her entire upper body. Everyone present in the Google classroom meet was able to see that. I thought you should be notified and remind Sage about behavior during the school day,

whether at home or in the school building on the dress code, blah, blah, blah. So yeah, so Sage was flashing. I don't know what to do about this kid. Every chance she got, she's whipping him out. Well, can you shame her? Can you shame her into thinking her body's bad? Not in 2021. I'm saying I know you'd answer most. I'm like, it fired for even saying this.

Yeah. Sounds to me like he's admitting he was looking at her boobs. Yeah, I know. Freak. You could charge him with a crime. Sounds to me like he's admitting he was looking at a boob. Yeah, I just freak Mr. Bandra, I've got some news for you Yeah, I'm just like she doesn't do that at home like I not once have I ever seen her she dances dances a lot at home, you know? Now I don't, I hope this doesn't come across as anything other than like just, just a guy who doesn't deal with special needs. People.

Right. If I was working, or if I was like starting a job with special needs kids, I would not be, I would not be like shocked out that if they did something like that, though. I don't know if like, can you expect them not to do stuff like that? I mean, isn't that just kind of stuff, like you just kind of have to like roll with the punches

and have make it. And don't make a big deal about something like that. I guess like he's not, I think that he would be like, I'm not making a big deal about it. And I'm just telling you, like she's showing her through his aunt's camera. But yeah, you're right. I think that that kind of stuff is fully expected from some,

like, for she is, she's like, she's in a totally different world. So it doesn't occur to her like that she's on camera. Dude, I just had a fucking memory pulled out like a suppressed memory. Really good story. Cute, did I ever tell this story that maybe I did? Like, probably worked at a place with special needs kids and he got me a job one day. Literally one day.

Yeah, I worked for one day. It was like a room for like really, like the special needs like to the 10th degree. Profound, yeah, they call it profoundly retarded at the time. And within the first hour of him getting me the job, didn't I have to take a female into the bathroom and like, they want to read diaper her. Yeah, yeah, that's what they wanted me to do on the, like within the first hour, it was like, okay, it's like, you know, like in platoon,

where they send the newbie out into the fucking little green deck. They didn't want to do it. So they had this fucking 19 year old kid, just started his first day and it's like, you go into the bathroom with a person that had to be it's 14, 14. It's 14, yeah. And change their diaper.

Oh my, they just met you. They were like getting in with that girl. Yeah, that is crazy. Yeah, Walt worked the one day. And in retrospect, it was like, like I worked there for, I think, most of the summer. It was my, I got the job because my girlfriend's mom worked there at the time. They expected Walt to do that. But at the same time, I remember like this

lady being like, I am not paid to wipe this child's nose all day. That was like the kind of place it kind of turned into, you know, yeah, the people in charge were definitely, they probably had been there too long and were so sorely underpaid and under probably under, under appreciated Maybe even not even up to the maybe they didn't have the the qualifications to do the job. They're hiring us But I remember they also gave me like I had to feed a kid and I would put the spoon of applesauce in his mouth and

It would just come out of his nose So it was just like this endless like like infinity cycle of being putting it in and then wiping it as it came out of his nose. I'm like, am I doing this right? Is this supposed to be, is this okay? Because I don't think anything's going down his gullet. I would think it's just going in and coming right out of his nose. I think the only high point of the day was it was this little

black kid named Corey and me, we're kicking a ball around with him. That was probably only good part of the day. I mean it was it was eye opening and just like I knew like one because I neither I couldn't walk away. I was too far away from home. I couldn't quit on the spot. And the way you would have known and I couldn't walk away. I was too far away from home. I couldn't quit on the spot And the way you would have no and I didn't have a license. Yeah, I would have quit and walked out But I didn't I couldn't walk out there was that that I could do so I had to stay and do these horrible things that they wanted I don't want to say horrible things, but like really Difficult things for a 19 year old to do you could say horrible And so I just I've ever like walking out to the car of bragging i was just like i am not coming back to this is fucked up

yeah but how long did you work there bruh i like that you were like i can handle this and also walled can as well uh i i think i work there about two months but i never did that stuff like i don't know why like maybe they're hazing water something but like i never changed anybody. That wasn't expected of me. Like mostly I just played with them. Like nobody was verbal. That's the other thing. Like nobody was verbal. Everyone was pretty bad off.

And there were girls who, there was like a girl who would like, she would hug me every day when she came in. And then you weren't allowed to hug her. She's like, because they're like, you know, they're sexual and they, she sees her boyfriend and all this other weird shit. I was like, the kid just wanted to hug and then she walks away. I don't, I didn't get it. But.

It'd be like a big shout out to anybody who does that for a living. Like that's the, like they have like hearts and they do things that like, you know, a lot of people cannot do on it by being one of them and it was like very I like I repressed that memory until now just thinking about that the thing would sage. Yeah, they're they do the Lord's work those people Oh hell yeah, and there are people who love do. Yeah, love it Yeah, well, I mean, I mean I guess there are parts like parts of the job which are rewarding

But there are also parts of the job that are just like I cannot mentally do this. I can't I guess there are parts where, like parts of the job, which are rewarding, but there are also parts of the job that are just like, I cannot mentally do this. I can. I'm sorry. I'm not equipped to deal with something like this. Yeah, especially if you're going to, like changing a diaper, you're going to start throwing up like you're doing a change your kid's diapers, right? I mean, I did. I changed the number one.

Oh, okay. Yeah, number two was a was the, was Debbie's job. Mm-hmm. Yeah, she, she was like, okay. Yeah, number two was the, was the, was Debbie's job. Yeah, she, and she was like, okay, I understand. You know, she never gave me a hard time about it. Right. That seems like a mom job. I mean, I know people are like, fuck you. But I just feel like it's too much.

Like the smell is fucking unreal. Like it's unreal. Yeah. I mean, moms, they don't care. My moms are different breeds, man. Yeah. That's why you're always getting about dad just walking away I got a change in that diaper I haven't smoked it day in my life. I got a pack of cigarettes step. Give me some Winston's Well, you had an experience at the post office recently. Can we talk about that?

I think it's awesome. Yeah, I guess we could talk about it. I mean, I don't want to get anybody in trouble, though. Well, I mean, nobody will be in trouble because nobody listening to this, whatever, nobody listening to this should do anything other than just listen to it. Like, we're not looking for any kind of retribution here. It's different than when they insulted me in that newspaper. Well, you're setting that up.

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That's it. You'll get 15% off your entire Raycon order, so feel free to grab a pair and a spare. Hey, they're saying grab too. So it's 15% off at buyraycon.com slash TESD. That's buyraycon.com slash T E S D. A little backstory here is due to Patreon wall. You're always going to the post office. Yeah. I help my daughter out and I'll bring some of the packages down to I go to multiple post

offices because I don't like to hammer one post office with a whole bunch of packages. Because the post office employees, They're pretty grouchy and They don't tend to like when you walk in with like a hundred packages. So what I'll do is I'll spread the wealth and I'll bring it to A whole bunch of like up and down Mom with county. I'll be I'm all over the place dropping off post postal packages and this one post office the lady in there She definitely didn't recognize me when I walked in even though I go I kind of go there somewhat frequently and She's talking to another customer about how there's no boxes because they offer free boxes if you if you use a certain kind of

Service for the post office you they'll give you a box that you could put this stuff in it's called the flat rate box But they're a priority. Yeah, but there weren't any on the sales floor and She started ranting and raving that people come in and steal the boxes and She's not shithraanting or even to somebody else's a ton right. And then she looks and I have, again, I have, I have a hat on, I have my mask on. I probably had Ray Bans. What's it? What are you called? Raycons in and I, oh, I thought we were talking about sunglasses. I thought

about Ray Bans. I was a paid attention. We're so waiting for Ray Bans. Come on, Ray Bans. I had my sunglasses on. So she starts saying that people are stealing things and she thinks that she kind of sees me and she thinks that I'm the number one suspect. The culprit. The guy that they think is coming in and taking the boxes and walking out of there, but it's not me.

Hold on, let me see if I can play this. I was recording it. I don't even know why I was recording it. I can't remember now, but. I'm so glad you had this. So I just want to talk about it. I'm so glad you had this. So I just want to talk about it.

So I just want to talk about it. I mean, that's $14.00, it's $10.00. All right. You should think about it after you've been until a friend has a guest or something. Yeah, I think you could have even heard of that. All right. All right, thank you, honey. But I need three of those if you have one. I need three of those if you have one. I need three of those if you have one.

I need three of those if you have one. I need three of those if you have one. I need three of those if you have one. I need three of those if you have one. I need three of those if you have one. I need three of those if you have one. I need three of those if you have one. I need three of those if you have one.

I need three of those if you have one. I need three of those if you have one. I need three of those if you have one. I You You Shit I Don't I Don't I I

I Take Everything You and they think they take everything. What the fuck are you? They're all in the room. You can open it online. But I load up the boxes. But you need us to do that. She said he doesn't do that.

She realizes that it's... She thought it was me. Who the fuck are you stealing all the boxes? No, no, no. I just brought boxes in, I don't I'm not taking any boxes Yeah, she but she was pissed though Wow Have you ever heard a drunker-sounding post office employee?

What if it sounded like you got accosted by a crack head on the street is what it sounded like That was crazy that that's a professional postal this worker Yeah, I mean, she's actually, she helps me out. She's actually very, very nice, usually. But. Oh, I disagree. I've been there too. But yeah, she was not having a good day.

And I think I hadn't been there in a while. And she just didn't really who I was. And she thought I was the guy stealing the boxes. I can't even use those boxes. I told her, I'm like, I don't been there in a while, and she just didn't really who I was, and she thought I was the guy stealing the boxes. I can't even use those boxes, I told her. I'm like, I don't take a note of boxes, I can't use those. You're defending yourself. Yeah, not to mention, our free from the post office.

Like I know people, I mean, this is what I used to do for our foreign stuff. I would take them, I would cut them, and then reassemble them backwards. They change that, you can't do that anymore. They print the, yeah, yeah, I saw take them, I would cut them and then like reassemble them backwards. They don't, they change that. You can't do that anymore. They print the, yeah, yeah, I saw that. Yeah. Suns of bitches.

But what do you attribute Walt's difficulty with post office employees to? Because first there was Susan. And literally anytime Marybeth hears the name Susan, she goes Susan? Like how was you in there? Every time with a fail. It post a word. Are very agitated bunch of people, easily agitated I should say.

Yeah, it's like pizza guys. Like pizza guys are always ready to go off on someone. I feel like postal employees either fall on the side of like wow They're so nice. I can't believe it or like somebody's going everybody stealing my shit Like what a weird scene and you seem like like you're unflappable You know why because I found that it Doesn't do like like to get my noi to her like she made a mistake she thought I was

somebody else and I got it and she was annoyed but like I got to deal with her and I got to deal with all the other post offices I go to on a very consistent basis so like I'm good to them on Christmas queue you know I give them give them gift cards and there's one guy go to beautiful man just a sweet part of them dude so patient and But I gave him like out of all the gift cards I gave to all the post-employees This year in the inno for tellm cvave

I told him I said like I give I'm giving you the are the most expensive gift card I said because I want to tell you is an absolute pleasure coming to this post off as I said you do not realize How nice it is to come in here and not have to like deal with the attitude I said Because it could break a man. I said like I walk out of there going like I can't do this no more I can't do this no more I can't go in there and have to yell at me just because I'm fucking bringing them boxes Which is their fucking job? Yeah, it's like they you're the reason they're staying like ultimately like how many billions are they in debt the post Oh, they'll never get out from underneath it. It's almost like they have tenure like a teacher where they're like we can't be fired

It's fucking insane. But I told that guy and he was like, he was touched. You know, I told him that like you're not like the other guys. I go, don't ever, don't ever change. Don't ever let the job get to you. I said because because you have a pure soul. I told this is the bullshit part. I swear to God, I told him that I said, like I'm giving you more than I

given any other post office I go to, I said, because it is a joy to come in here. Like, I never fucking have my body doesn't tense up and I don't feel like the sweat's coming on. Cause I know I'm gonna get yelled at. I said, I just wanna let you know that I appreciate you being in this world. I don't know his name.

But I mean, I told them all this. I guess it was kind of weird when I walked out. He had to be going like, what the fuck? Yeah, like, it was like a kiss me. How old was the guy? He's about my age. Yeah. I think it's funny, like, sometimes when we're watching TV

or something, like, or we're talking about something Mary Beth will be like, oh, that guy's ancient. He's like literally 10 years younger than me. Yeah. I find I'm starting to resent her youth. Oh, man. What's going to happen? Uh-oh. How could you think it was? Like, that's the fucking Brian Johnson that I know of. Yeah. He thought that that would never ever

fucking arise. That would never ever pop up. That's other people. But I'm just thinking I'm like, okay, like, let's say I live a long, long life, right? Like, 53, yeah. I'm just thinking I'm like okay like let's say I live a long long life right? I'm ready to go. I think this is the good thing on the way out. Take care of your business talent. Get your fairs. Get your fairs. Mary Beth, where's let's say I even live till 93. I live another 40 years, right? She's still only gonna be 66. That's it. She can go out, she can fucking party. At 66? Sure, why not? She may be going out and playing Bingo,

and I'm sure you might not want to do that, but you're gonna have to let her have a little bit of leisure. At 66, my God. Oh no, I mean, I'll be dead. Oh, okay. Yeah, I'll be dead, so I resent that you'll have this whole like second life after me. And 93 is probably being kind, you know?

Like let's say, let's say it's even 80, you know, like say 30 years from now, 83, you know, she'll only be 56, 56 is prime fucking Cougar age. She's gonna be going out and fucking lawn boys and pool boys and fucking. But you probably won't even know. No, I'll be dead, of course I won't know. Well, I mean, but you also,

you also could be in some sort of vegetative state too. I hope so. So I'm a burden. That's my dream to be a burden. Like she can't go out. I don't worry Brian. You will be. I soiled myself again.

Well, we call him off top top I remember back in 72 He was a way of it 92. No, 86th the guy could change a diaper. You wouldn't believe it It is like you could tell that's how traumatic it was that like 1986 and it was like it was yesterday. Oh, yeah Yeah, cuz it was it was not a solid movement. I remember it. It looked like wax. This is what this is what theirs looks like. Think of all the fucking memories of your family that you've forgotten that you'll never remember that waxy fucking shit that'll never leave no no there's nothing that could erase it it's fucking weird it was very deep and now that you fucking drug it drug it out of me you're or dragged it out of me now I'll never

forget it again yeah you ever see on the truck go ahead you you. Go ahead, cue. I was just going to say, I can't remember my grandmother's voice anymore. I do. Have you ever seen a turn of sunshine of the spotless mind? Yeah. Do you ever see it? No. It's a movie and it's about this technology that exists where they can go in and they can erase certain memories.

Oh. You know, so you could erase that diaper or whatever. Disexist or this is a science fiction. No, this was sci-fi. Jim Carrey was in it. And what's the girl's name? Kate Winslet. Kate Winslet? No.

No? Yeah, Kate Winslet? No. Fuck was it? Yeah, I think it is Kate Winslet. I don't know. Some British. Would you like to do that, Q?

If you had the opportunity, it wasn't like, we I don't know. Some British. Like to do that, Q, if you had the opportunity, it wasn't like, we had to open up your skull case. But no, it was just, yeah, there might be one or two things that I'd be like, let's get that out. I don't need that. Yeah, I mean, yeah, I bet you a lot of people would be like, yeah, I wouldn't, I would like to live a life not having to remember something like something horrible.

Mm. Like take your shoes off. Petty things. Yeah, it'd be mostly like petty things like like like somebody else's shit or something like that. It would be little things like that or a person that I can't stand. I'd be like, just cut him out. Or something that was said to you that it's like, I can't unhear that now. Yeah.

Like little things like that. Yeah. I would take it. I would take that. Yeah, a little ship, but not huge like segments. Like I wouldn't want like as, as you know, not fun as so many years were prior to meeting Mary Beth. I wouldn't erase them because it's like then there's a huge segment of time where you're like, what happened? I mean, you probably still say that when you look at that person, different reasons. Fucking tornado of a girl comes in.

Cure, do you still follow soccer? I have not followed any sports in the past few years because I'm busy I've been. I don't know. We might, you know know if this is something that maybe is too hot button we could always cut it out but i saw recently a news article that uh... there was the soccer coach uh... overseas he got fired because in a postgame interview he used this phrase um... while describing

what he felt was unfair treatment by the referees to his players. He said, I don't know when we are going to get our penalty. One of my players will have to rape someone or get raped himself if he was going to get a penalty. And that dude was fired like less than an hour later by the organization for using the word rape to describe how the referees were treating his players. Oh wait, I thought he was saying. Yeah. Oh, he would have to rape somebody on the field.

Yeah, he just said it. He said rape. Right. He was just using rape as an analogy. Yeah, and I Got to be like My thing would just be like the reason I'm firing you is not because you said the word rape The reason I'm firing you is because you're so fucking stupid that you said the word rape. Yes Like that's why you're getting fired who knows what you're an eating next

Yeah, like you're a fucking moron. Like, like, I'm not offended at all. I'm just offended by what a fucking dope you are. In this day and age, if you don't know that that's not the fucking word to use in a post game interview with fucking reporters, yeah, you're a fucking idiot. Say a salt.

You say a salt, you still have your job. But I mean, like, I've watched sports for a long time. I know, I know I'm guilt, not in the last 10 years though, but I know I've screamed at the TV that like, oh my God, he fucker raped them. Why didn't they get the call?

And I bet it, but you know what? But that was like, you know, in the 90s though, probably I said that. Everybody was saying it back then. But even if you said it now, But you know what but that was like you know in the 90s though probably I said But even if you said it now I would it wouldn't I don't I mean you're a private citizen in your own house You could say whatever you want. Yeah, but but could I face You know a backlash from from listeners though now by admitting I had used that analogy in like to understand a cup playoff So Scotty Gomez is going down the fucking middle of the ice against the Rangers in you know in a playoff game And I'm like, you know, oh my god. You got fucking great. Why didn't he get that call?

You know, I mean I've been guilty of it. I can't remember Maybe no more than five times Right well if you're listening to this and you're a fucking idiot complain about while using the word, no, I don't want anybody to complain. I just want to let you everybody know though that I've stopped using that analogy though.

What do you say now? Now I would just be like, oh my god, he got mugged much better, right? Yeah. Yeah, yeah, I do that still acceptable. Yeah, but mugged, I have definitely not, I definitely have taken that out of my lexicon when when describing a sports call knows this because your

families around or um, or I just feel like, yeah, I just think that like, you know, the word, you know, it really shouldn't be used in such like, you know, willy-nilly-ly like that. It should only be used for what it is. You know, the repugnant ugly thing that it is not to, not a sports analogy. Well, sometimes I like, if everybody doesn't give me enough dinner, I'll be like, well, why did I get raped for it? Like, over dinner. Like, what the fuck? I mean, I've definitely discussed contract negotiations in terms of getting paid Use that like at the at the meeting when you're like trying to play hardball

Do you want me to pull my pants down? I mean like I mean like you guys raped us seasons one through five I'm like so fucking call fuck I'll say something like that really because I don't make people stop You know that you're right. I get their attention. Yeah, I'm I'm I'm I I won't use it going forward not not after another conversation you guys mugged me Okay, there's robbed you guys robbed me? Rob, yeah. But I agree with you, Q, though. Like, if you don't know better, like, if you're professional sports setting, really,

in Eddie's, any setting, if you don't know that by now, you are a fucking moron. If I had a position that I would like, oh, I could get fired from it, I wouldn't say it. Like, I wouldn't say it. Like, I wouldn't even have said it just right now. Because there's so many dickheads looking to just to get you fucking shickhand, but I mean, the guy, like, there's so many other words to choose. You don't even have to use my- But do you think, though, do you think, though, that there'll be people who are like upset

by me, like, saying in the 90s, I had't probably I can't even I can't even say definitively if I did But I almost feel like I probably had to have My read the story that I had to use that but I am saying though I no longer use it though. I like I grew I Realized they don't care no no, it doesn't matter if you've stopped using it for 25 years It's what you did back then that matters not the person you are today. Don't you understand? No, that doesn't matter if you've stopped using it for 25 years. It's what you did back then that matters. Not the person you are today. Don't you understand?

No, that's not true. He's owning up to it before he got caught. That's personal growth. Got ahead of it. That's what they say, right? That's personal growth. Yeah. Oh, okay.

I think I do believe like, you know, it's a word that definitely should not be used. Unless it's actually a meaningless game like a hockey or football or soccer or whatever it may be. Yeah, I mean, the soccer guy using it is like, what do you mean? That's what we're here to say. It's like a really weird thing to say, like because it conjures up the image of soccer players raping each other just to get a penalty. Q, before we get out of here, because I can see you're faltering, you're looking a little

sicker by the minute. Oh, no. Yeah, I'm getting a little hangdog. I could see it. Yeah. When you get your next test, the Chinese have, you know, they're always giving us new stuff. They have now have an anal swab test for coronavirus. What are you saying?

The most effective way to get tested, I heard. Yep. Yeah? Yeah. I'm down swab. Who's doing it? I gotta do it to myself. I mean, I'm cool with that, but I mean, I get.

Well, anal swabs require inserting a cotton swab an inch I have to toe inches into your anus and gently rotating it. So I guess you can it over to whoever tests it. Yeah, I mean, they would need it, right? Yeah. Here's my swab. Hey, who's going to take my swab over here? I just want my anus. Does it, like, why is that preferred over the nose?

I mean, I'm going to take my swab over here. I just want my anus. Does it, like, why is my swab over here? I just want my penis. Does it like why is that preferred over the nose than the nasal? I think it's more like it says a throat swab on a 52 year old man showed negative results after the person showed symptoms, but he tested positive using nose and anal swabs. So like Walt says, I think it's just a little bit more effective. But who the fuck's, but who's doing throat swabs? And even the first time I even heard about

it, it's all nasal. Is nasal as good as anal? Because of so, I'll just stick with nasal. I guess so. It's a stool test, maybe more effective than respiratory tests and identifying COVID-19. Oh, that's with me. And if I got a, we're in production. I'm, I, we're usually taking like five tests a week. So that'd be a lot of fucking abuse on the caboose.

Oh, yeah. You'd be straight. You'd have like that prolapse, like goatsy ainess. Yeah. Yeah. I'd be on like your only fans showing people for five bucks. Still COVID-free. Tell them Steve Day.