Tell Em Steve-Dave - #540: Hot Grandma

Episode Date: December 25, 2022

Bry goes to Orlando, Married with Children, Ship Breaker, questions are answered.

The So big navigations, but whether they win a loose triumph or fail, this team is August and they will prevail. You win the tables. Spissed for me. Hello and welcome to this week's edition of Space Monkeys. Oh, shit. No, Walt Flanagan this week. No Walter. Flanagan lists.

Does that equal rudder list? We'll see. Or there are some people who would suggest that there is no rudder with that water. Yeah, but we'll find out. I've heard complaints. Have you? I've heard tales from Reddit. Yeah, I don't go to Reddit, but people for some reason want to tell me what's on Reddit.

Really? Who does that? Who's the person that that reports on? What Chuck told me one time? Chuck? Yeah Chuck's dead and stating yeah, I know I have a complicated relationship with Chuck Yeah, I remember there was one point where you're gonna take them under your wing and teach him everything you knew and then Was that it? Just gonna hang out once I have nothing to teach Chuck Chuck's probably like more

Knowledge about shit than I am. It's got his finger more on the pulse. He is, he's a young and eager. He's hungry. He's hungry. You know, I suggest everybody out there follows Instagram. It looks like he's always having fun.

Oh, forget Chuck for a second. I've got an Instagram for you and for everyone else. Oh yeah. T-E-S-D comics. T-E-S-D comics. All right, let me look at this right now. That's on Instagram. That's a guy, I think his Instagram handle is also on this. Okay. Which one? Kenny Rubenis. Oh wow, what is he does little little little comics? There's only one

so far. He does. No, there's a whole bunch. Really? Yeah. Let me see the one. I should be, I very much show me a whole bunch today. All right. I don't see the one. Mary Beth showed me a whole bunch today. All right. I wasn't aware of it until today. Oh, I see. Now it's my new favorite Instagram account. Oh, this is fun. I'm going to follow this.

Yeah. Give it a follow-by not. All right, I'm in. He takes, in case you're wondering what we're talking about. He takes little moments from Tell Him Steve Dave episodes and draws them into comic strip form. I think he might take some license with it to him, not sure, because I can't remember saying any of these things. It's funny, I'm on the look of him now.

All right, so fuck Chuck, I guess. Yeah, Chuck, sorry. You're on the back burner now, baby. We're all about TSD comics. Yes, sorry, Chuck. It looks like you don't back burner now, baby. Yeah. We're all about TSD comics. Yes, sorry, Chad. It looks like you don't need us though, Chad. That's what I'm saying. He's out there forging his own path.

There'll be a better man for it. Yeah, for sure, man. Because you were talking about moving them in. Yeah, Chad. Like a complete, immersive BQ experience. Yeah, I do think about Chad. Chad was you 24-7. None of that's true, but I

I will say I think about Chuck. I think he would be surprised by how much I Think about him. Yeah, not like I wonder what he's up to today, but I track I like because I always have these ideas for like Projects and chip, but I'm never able to get any of them done Because I'm so busy and I'm like, what if I had a chuck? That was like, he was like, he was on staff, he's on salary. He's like on standby? Yeah. And his job is to execute these ideas, you know?

That sounds like something you would see in a movie like a king having somebody follow him around. And you're like, here's my next decree. Then make it so chuck. Not like that. Not like that. Like creative, like a creative partner. Okay.

More than head to creetaker. Right, okay, so he flashes out your initial vision. Yeah, or like we talk, like I have someone to talk to about it and be like, this is how we can do this. And then he just goes and gets it done. Right. I think about that part, that's the tough part. Yeah, but I mean, that's what I'm saying.

Nobody would ask him to do it for free. It would be, he'd get paid. So it's like a job, a fun job, creative job. But then if I think about it past that, I'm like, you know, he's gonna run a sin job, creative job. But then, if I think about it past that, I'm like, you know he's gonna run, sitting around waiting for me to fucking, and he'll just do, end up wasting his fucking school and his jets.

Oh, like waiting for you to come up with your next idea. Yeah, cause he'll wanna pitch some, and I'll be like, ah, look man, I gotta come up with my own. I can't even, I don't even have time to think about my own that alone. Right. Yours. So it's like right away we're in this adversarial relationship. You're discouraging.

Yeah, yeah, it's like, I don't wanna do that to the guy because he's so clearly like, you know, killin' it. Yeah, yeah. So, you know, I don't know, but I do think about chucking his skills and talents. Yeah. So someday, it's tucked there in the back of your mind.

Someday, who knows, Chuck, you might get that call. I think what's probably gonna happen is Chuck is gonna get bigger, too big for me. You think so? Because I know you rub his elbows with some elite New York comics. Does it really? Mark Norman. Oh, okay, yeah, that's right.

Joe Lista, is that a Joe Lista? All right. I love Mark Norman. That's great. Yeah, I just think Chaps 2 talented, it's too driven to like, to, I think one day soon, he'll be in the midst of something bigger than he thinks. Yeah.

Yeah. And then he'll be like, you want to take my calls? Massive dark web child pornography. No. Yeah. I didn't think I'd been up here, but definitely that. I'm not associated with a guy. I'll make that very clear.

No, no, I do the music extremely driven it down. What do you watch on those videos, yours chuck? What is it exactly? Yeah, so I don't know. So yeah, I think about chuck, chuck a bunch. You're right. Yeah. Yeah.

How do we get on Chuck? I forget. We're gonna do probably do a lot of forgetting this episode. Why you smoked already? I didn't smoke anything. Okay. I ate something. Oh, okay, yeah.

I mean, clearly I've eaten lots of things, but that's particular. Yeah, I'm straight. I'm not having to, I haven't eaten anything. You're so waltz with us in spirit, though. Yeah, I'm straight. I'm not having to Have a day here. So Walt's with us and spirit. Yeah. Yeah. I'm drinking this water Yeah, yeah, that's a Fiji water. Yeah, it's a shit. Well, I stole this Because what happens is we do these warm-up shows for the tour and You have to pay for the green room stuff So they'll charge you like sixteen dollars for like a pack of feed you water.

And then you only drink one or two and you end up leaving like a bunch behind. I see brand is fucking laughing all the way back. So I grab a. All right. I just grab a wasn't Vinnie. It actually wasn't the stress factor was. Yeah, I take them. I'm like, fuck, man.

If like, they're mine. They're mine. They're bottom. They're gonna turn around I take them. I'm like, fuck, man, if like, they're mine. They're mine. They're bottom. They're gonna turn around and sell them at the, if I don't take what I already paid for, they're gonna double dip and sell it to somebody else. Right. Now they're making money off my back.

Can't have. They're earning off you. Yeah, well, I'm thirsty. So here I go with a delicious VG water. Straight as an arrow. And it does have a nice tape. You know, they say that's got that like a silky feel to it. It does. I agree. I a VG water. Straight as an arrow. And it does have a nice tape. You know that they say that's got that like silky feel to it. It does.

I agree. I like VG. Yeah, I mean, I wouldn't pay more for it. No. There's a 99 cents one and there's a fucking $2 VG. Go for the 99 cents one. Same thing. Just drink the still water. Fucking water, man.

Just go to the tap. And we're talking about water again. Remember last episode? We were talking about tap water. It was to the tap and we're talking about water again remember last episode we were talking about tap water it was the best tap water I went to I went to Orlando over my birthday thank you everyone for a birthday wishes yeah and did nearly nothing didn't go any of the big parks because we didn't want to oh felt great like knowing that you didn't have to get up and battle with crowds and all that shit. And the kid was, you know, you pay all that money and then the kid like, cocks out halfway through the day. And when she's done, she's done. There's no

like, like, I'm not going to be able to like, to go out her until she like snapped back. There's no like amount of like, I would have been beaten as a child. Like, where in this fucking park? I paid for this park. No fucking in the park. Like there's no amount of that with her. She's just, she's out.

She's out. Yeah, so we did Gatorland one day. I love Gatorland. Do you? My do. Yeah, it's fun for like, I don't know, I felt like It is a real ghetto S

Sea world kind of do they still have the cement tooth mouth the giant out front. Yeah, yeah That's without I remember that from a kid. Yeah, I mean, it's it's like you go in and like yeah, you definitely see like Gators right and then see a lot of Gators. You do that loop around the swamp. You do the loop, or we did the train, like they tried, and they got, they nicknamed, I'm here for every year, and the kid enjoyed it, so I guess I can't complain too much.

Like she got to hold a snake, like a big old boa or something, you know. It's fucking Gator, Gatorland. Gatorland, Gatorland, Gatorland. I fucking love G a land man. We, like, I was like, you guys are really stretching that though there was one exhibit where it's like a raccoon that they found and they put on the cage.

Just like behind the cage there's a tree with a raccoon in it. I'm not even kidding around like when we were on the train ride. There's like a fence separating like the geter land property from like the better woods and all the bigger woods and all that. And there's a raccoon trying to get in over the Gatorland fence. So like maybe he's trying to rescue his friend. He's like, yeah, it's guy out of here before they feed him to the Gators. I don't even think of that. Those Gators love chicken though, man. They feed them those whole chickens. They jump up and eat them and shut. I think

we shot a Gatorland. When we did that bit where they put my backpack on the back of an alligator and I had to get it off. I think it was. Mary Beth was saying she didn't like that. I didn't like that. She felt scared for you. Yeah, I wasn't scared for me. I was worried about hurting the alligator.

I was like grabbing his arms to get them out of the loops on the thing, on the backpack. And I remember just being like, and they edited it very well. They edited it so I looked like I'm really kind of scared, but like if you watch the whole footage, I'm sitting there going like, I don't want to hurt this alligator. I was like, am I gonna,

I don't wanna even wrench, I don't even wanna like cause him like discomfort. And then they're like, he's a fucking dinosaur man He's like you're not gonna like by moving his arm. You're not gonna hurt him They'll watch out for the tail. I don't like that. All right, so I didn't like that bit I can't wait to go home tonight and tell her how I'm like let me tell you something you stupid bitch He wasn't even scared

He didn't want to hurt the alligator's had a feel now Yeah, it was more upset hurt the alligator. How do you feel now? Yeah, I was more upset about the alligator hurt getting hurt. I don't think she's stupid for that. I mean, that's masterful editing if anything. Yeah, that's a good job. Yeah. The place we stay, oh, we also went to, there's like an international drive

where there's a giant Ferris wheel, okay, which I remember liking Ferris wheels. This Ferris wheel made me not want to go on anymore Ferris wheel. Okay. Which, I remember liking Ferris wheels. This Ferris wheel made me not want to go on anymore Ferris wheels. Was it a classic open air Ferris wheel or one of those pods you get in? Well, one of the pods that you get in. Yeah, fuck those pods.

Pods, well, you get into the pod and right away I noticed that like the seat is really small like in the center. So I guess you can sort of face out all ways and stuff. But there's like water all over it. So now I'm standing for however the duration of this trip. Why is it water? I don't know. It's not water. You think it was it didn't smell like pissed. Okay. I think somebody spilled a drink on it or whatever. They couldn't bother a wipe that up. Yeah. All right. So you get in this we get on and I go I should immediately notice the water on the seat and I'm like, all right, well, however long this ride is that's how long I'm going to be standing right and it's like it's not like all right everybody on.

Go around three times it's get on. Move stop. Go stop. Go to more was like I never should have fucking paid for this Yeah, the click and Kony Island at the Ferris wheel there They got it worked out pretty well the time. Yeah, they load it up. Yeah, you go around for a few spins And they let the other people off then they let you go around for a few spins. Great St. That's what we should have done. She's about the Kony Island Kony Island in the middle of December The aquarium there it's like fucking Requiem for a dream. It's a stark birthday.

Yeah. They may have wanted to go on this ride called the slingshot. You know what that is? Yeah, I wouldn't do it. I wouldn't do it either. I told her I wasn't going to do it. She said that sage said she wanted to do it. But I figured that once sage saw it sought She was like not going to want to

And even Mary Beth, I was like, I don't know. It just seems it seems dangerous, man Like it is one of those rides where it's like you're asking to get ejected and shot through and fucking yeah Like the cable the air. They're getting one of them's gonna go eventually Statistically. Yeah, it has to happen. Yeah, I don't love it. Maybe I don't yeah I don't love it, but I don't even like the sensation that they're selling. Like you're just swooping. And everybody's passing out. Yeah, I don't need that.

Titties are popping out, which is a good part of it. Well, hold on. There's sales. There's bonuses. Yeah, give me a good haunted house, right? Oh, yeah. Yeah, that's for a scar I would much rather than that. That's just stressful.

But anyway, so we get to the counter. Yeah. And Maryeth says to the guy, well, how much for the slingshot? And he goes, oh, we don't have that anymore ever since the accident. And it was that one, I guess, many times.

So many titty, so many. Oh, no, I wish. I would have bought all the pictures that they take like in the videos and stuff. So successful. It's just hanging out there. I scoop them up before the people, What about all the pictures that they take? Like, on the videos and stuff. So obsessed with this. I just hang out there, and I scoop them up before the people,

and the rightful donors can get to the fucking kiosk. Anyway, wait, what was I saying? So the accident. Oh, the accident, which was a kid, I think he was like 14 or something, like fell from the harness, like it wasn't attached properly or something, and he died. Yeah, and it was at that slingshot. Oh, Shit. So that's why he was like, yeah, we don't have it anymore since the accident, but then goes on to say, but they do have them here here.

You just told me somebody died on this fucking. Yeah, like No way. Yeah, I'm not gonna drive somewhere else to fucking get on one of these goddamn, oh, 14-year-old died. That's a broth, man. Yeah, I think he fell out of his seat or something. Oh, he's poor parents. What that must've been like. I wonder if that video exists because they videotape everything.

So it has to exist somewhere. That's horrible. Oh, man, that's so bad. It's like the family's ruined because of this fucking stupid ride. Yeah, I've never been a fan of thrill rides. I got sick too easily. And the one thing that we saw in the Ferris wheel is like the swings. Like you know, it's like a, like a, like they go around in a circle.

Yeah, that a few. People sitting in the swings, but this went up so high. I'm like, oh my god, I can do this. It wasn't, yeah, it wasn't like like boardwalk level Yeah, it was stories high-holded up with Christmas lights You're like I can imagine like being on acid I can stand up Now that would now make me happy

Yeah No, no, no, fuck it. Like now that would not make me happy. Yeah. And what else in her? Oh, Hock grandma at the pool. Oh, really? Yeah, I was a lady who took a shine to sage because sage relakes will talk to herself a lot or her friends, her imaginary friends. Sure.

And sometimes she gets like real loud and animated in shit. So I'm like, you know, you're in public calm down a little bit, you know? Nobody wants it. I don't know if he wants loud and animated in shit. So I'm like, you know, you're in public. Calm down a little bit, you know. Nobody wants to listen to this shit. She go on and on and on. She's arguing, she's having dialogues and monologues and all kinds of crap.

And so the lady was like, oh no, that's okay. You know, I work with special needs kids for years. And then she went on to talk about like her grandchildren in shit. But the whole time I'm like, is this woman younger than me? Cause she was a hot grandma. Yeah. She was in a bikini.

That's nice. And she'd have belly ring. I'm like, I can't imagine my grandma having a belly ring. Wow. Belly ring maze. My, my grandmother was like 60 when I was born. Yeah. If she started early though, uh, you know, sometimes those belly rings,

they seem to find out party back in the day. If she's got belly ring to date, right? Not giving it up. No. So let's say she had a kid at 16, 17. Good day, she's wild. Then she has a grandchild by the time she's, what kind of example was she?

Of course, her kids gonna have a kid early 30s early 40s man. Why am I here at 55 marveling that a grandma could be younger than me? Yeah, you do the math if it makes sense. Yeah, you're in I guess you're you're in that stage where you're like this is like it's called the night you're gonna start accepting this. Yeah, I guess so you're not you're in that stage where you're like, this is like, it's called the night. You gotta start accepting this. Yeah, I guess so. You're not gonna, really 60 is like where grandparents really, that's where you think of them.

Well, but that's them living to 30, not having a kid till they're 30, and then their kids not having kids until they're 30. Right. Which seems a long time. You know, like, do people really wait until 30 to have kids? Unless they're popping them out in the late 20s. Yeah, the late 20s, I would say early 30.

I think more people are waiting these days. Sure, but you can't even fucking afford to have a kid. But you can be a grab here in a 55 for easy. Yeah, yeah. I guess so. I wonder if she was like, I saw a grab. I don't think she was saying that. Did she have like a young attitude about her?

She had a young fun attitude. Her husband was a cool guy. Oh yeah? Yeah, he's handsome too. Yeah. Good, if it's your grandfather. Yeah, I'm like, you're making me swim with a shirt on. It's like, how do I want you to be? You know exactly what I mean. He will piece

a shit. Mary Beth, let's go back to the room. This is no fun. She's like, now I'll stay. I'll just stay here. Tak grandpa is lurking about. And not grandma's. God damn her. Yeah. You know what? Let's take a quick break from all this fun okay and make it even more fun because we got something for you and it's called the undies oh hell yeah this is all you really need it's not too late well actually once this comes out it'll be too different Christmas but you can get them for somebody for like, oh, like, you don't see them at Christmas, so you're like, I'm not like pressed to buy them their present yet. So it still could work for you. Who doesn't love getting new vandishes for the holidays? Nobody, that's who. So, Amanda's is your go-to spyfish nuggly soft vandishes and more that all your loved ones

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Right. And then they get meondies and they're like, holy shit, my fucking mind is blown. My perceptions have all changed. I was an asshole. I was blind man. I was living in the matrix. I'm the piece of shit ammo. I have to fucking question my entire.

I'm never gonna take my shirt off in front of that grandpa. You have fucked that guy. Next year I'll go back. Better than ever. I'll show him. Full year. better than ever. I'll show him. I'll show him. I'll show him. I'll show him.

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now, even though it's only a three-hour flight with all the driving and shit and all that. It goes along with it. We stop at Denny's, we're hungry, and the lady is like, she's taking the order, and I'm like, I'll take the whatever the fucking grand slam, whatever the fuck it is. She goes, you want pancakes with that, right? And I was like, well, when else is there? And she's like, toast, but all we have is seven grain. And I was like, all right, I'll take some seven grain toast. I'll go up to nine if you had it, but you're saying you only have seven. And then she goes, I can't eat grain.

And I was like, oh, no, why is that? And then regretted asking, why is that? Because she gave me an entire breakdown of her digestive issues for like the past two years. And this is your waitress. This is the waitress, hanging out by the table. Yeah. Just ruining your appetite.

Yeah, she's like talking about coal and stuff. Oh, that's a stuff. I was like, this is kind of triplets gonna be, but then we got to the hotel and guess who's there. Who? I'm Grandma. Yeah, all right. Yeah, it made everything better. I was like this is a kind of trip. It's good to be but then we got to the hotel and guess who's there who Yeah, it made everything better. Oh man. I was tricked By my wife I don't like it. I'm not sure how to feel about this is good. Let me see who I side with now normally it's a shoe in

That I'm going to side with you. Right. But who knows? I'll do my best to never know. I think that you're a fair and impartial judge. I think if I were wrong, you'd be like, nah, you're wrong, but... That's true, I would. Yeah. I mean, it's still take your side, but... Just be on the wrong side.

So the other day, Mary Beth is like, what are you doing on the 20th? Do you have anything planned? December 20th and I said that's more that's tomorrow, okay, and I said no why and then she goes back to the phone Before I say what before answering why and is like yeah, the six o'clock on the 20th will be great. Oh, well hangs up She's like I won something I was like all right. what did you win? It's good news so far. Right? Yeah. It sounded promising.

I won something. I was like, what did you win? She's like, I won a portrait of us. And I was like, what do you mean you? Like, how did you win that? And she's like, well, I signed up. And like, she made it sound like, how well and I won the canoeing trip?

How I just like wrote my name on a fucking ticket. Dropped a fucking ticket and dropped it in and like randomly it was selected. Yeah. That's kind of the way she was making it sound that this portrait company that's in Red Bank had a contest and she won and we're going to get our portrait for free. Okay. Is that someone painting you? That's photography. It's what they do is they take a picture.

Yeah. And then they paint it from there. I don't know if it's digitally or well. Sure. And you get a free 11 by 14. All right, nice. Now, they're saying $2,500 value. That is aggressive.

That's an aggressive pricing is aggressive. Yeah. That is not good business practice. Now I said to Mary Beth, I was like, so wait a second. So let me get it straight so far. And I do think we have it straight. We go over there, we take a picture, which I fucking hate getting my picture taken. Okay, fine.

And then from there they paint the portrait. I was like, what do they want from us? She's like, nothing. She said it's no obligation. To sit there and listen to like a time share thing. That's what I'm thinking. I'm like, but, because I can tell there's a butt,

but she's not like getting to it. And then it turns out that if you want, you can get it framed. Or if you want, you can get it framed. Or if you want, you can get it matted, or whatever these little extras that they offer. And I was like, they want to fucking sell us something. That's what this comes down to. You didn't win shit.

But you could go there and get it and just not get the frame of the matting and leave. Right, and that's what I said to her. I said, I'm not buying anything from these people because if I do, that means we did and definitely did not win. And I was like, and on top of it, I'm like, I don't like it in my picture taken. So what is the, so what are you asking me here? Is that trickery?

If somebody, she got me to agree to it without telling me why. Okay. Yeah. It's not trickery, but you could still just be like, she, she, but definitely booked it, right? Without fucking asking about it, but she was in communication with these people. Yeah, but you could just be like, I don't wanna do it.

Don't do it. If you don't wanna do it, why are you gonna do it? Why does she want it? I don't wanna do it. Yeah, but she really wants to do it. She likes having her picture taken I don't want to do it. Yeah. But she really wants to do it. She likes having her picture taken. I don't know. Like she's like, going back way back when she was like in

Pagents and shit like that. Okay. And like did modeling stuff for a while. So like she's, look, you look at her and you're like, of course you like at your picture taken. You're like, I mean, it's like,

oh, I understand. So why don't you tell her to get her portrait taken. It's just be like, you know what I'd really like, honey? It's just a portrait of you because you can't stand it by itself because you know she's coming back with that frame and that mat. Oh, yeah. I got a big open eye on that.

Not a pine frame. Yeah, that looks heavy. Heavy usually equals expensive. It's cherry wood. She's like, I want it. Oh. Well, if you don't want to do it, so did you get tricked? Yes. Well, not tricked, but she definitely took some wife leeway with their schedule. At least she asked if you were free, but yeah, if you don't want to do it, I'm a big proponent of like, if you don't want to do something, you should just shouldn't

do it. Yeah. I mean, oh, and then I was like, well, in my mind, I'm like, okay, I live 15 minutes away from this portrait studio. I'm like, how long could it take for them to snap a picture of you? Right. Right now. She's like, it's, it's, it, there's, it's from six to eight.

I'm like two hours. So it's a photo shoot. And then they pick the best one. That's what I'm thinking. Yeah. Yeah. You got, you got to, you got to do it. I got to see this fortune. Let's see other thing. I'm like, this is who I am. I'm a guy who gets pictures painted of me. I mean, and like, not by like listeners who send shading. And then by like listeners who send shit in. And then by the way, whoever sent in the painting of Princess Mitch, thank you very much. Sage loves it.

And Sherry also who sent in a thing of Salomon, Princess Mitch. Oh, I got him on the brain. Nice. Yeah. Yeah. So you're going to do it tomorrow. I'm going to do it. Where are you going to wear?

I don't know Can they paint you in like like a revolutionary wore outfit? Well, I was gonna say like paint me slimmer. Yeah, you know Don't don't capture everything You know like they have the pain of these a painting in like a landscape He is a pain in like a landscape. Yeah, when there were how many liberties he would let you take like before he was like look at this point I'm just painting someone and I have to charge like I'm just making someone up and I have to charge you What you're describing doesn't look like you at all Like maybe you look like aqua man. Yeah, yeah, yeah, you could doesn't look like you at all.

Like maybe you look like Aquaman. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You could do that though if you wanted. Like you can just take my face and just paint Aquaman's body on me. Well, I think this is even better. It's just like you would have made about just got a portrait of her and Aquaman. And then you don't even got to go. That's true. She's her adjacent mammal.

She just brings a picture of a mole with her. Why not? My Photoshop that shit up. Man, what do you want? I'm almost would rather see what that looks like. Yeah, right. I'd probably hang that in my house. Like this portrait, I don't know.

Hang it in at a house. Like that seems to be even the next step towards like pink in the air. Bullshit. What are you gonna do? You're gonna put it above your fireplace? Oh no. I put it in the air bullshit. What are you gonna do? You can put it above your fireplace? Oh no. Put it in the fireplace, maybe.

We'll put it in a guest bedroom and cut the eyes out. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Now I want to do it. It's put to googly eyes behind us. See here shuffling scuffler behind the walls. There's squirrels back there. Oh, look at that portrait. Why would they have that done? They must have won it. Nobody would pay for something like that.

The eyes really follow you. I swear I'm not high. I'm not. I swear. Oh, I could think of it as like that because Mary Beth keeps talking about Frank five and his wife staying the night. Oh, when did they do that over the hour? They have not yet. She wants that to happen. She wants that to happen. So like, I'm imagining them being the couple in the night. Oh, did they do that over the hour? They have not yet. She wants that to happen. She wants that to happen. So I'm imagining them being the couple in the room.

I don't know, like a second. Why, she's really gotten close to Miss Five. She likes Mary a lot. Yeah. She likes Frank too. It's possible she's not to like Frank, right? Yeah, pretty much. Although there are some people that have to be really, yeah.

Sorry, at least, uh, no, I don't know. I think there are the Franks. It looks like anybody else, he has some haters out there, you know? Sure, of course, of course. But he's a guy. I mean, if you look at him, Mr. and Mrs. V, like, they clearly like get along and like each other. Yeah.

But they don't present that way. Like, he's always taking shots at her and shots at the man. It's like an old school sitcom. Right. It's like, it's like married with children almost, which I've been rewatching lately. Sure. Like, from what, the first episode? First episode too, we just started season five.

So, to hold up. Some of the episodes are great. Other ones are like, wow, I don't remember it being this cartoony. They're bringing it back as a cartoon. Are they really? They got the original cast, yeah. Oh, well.

Back. You know, he, what, I'm reading that book that David Miltrut, life's work, it's his own bag and he's writing it while he has Alzheimer's and shit like that, it's crazy. And he said, his first choice for Swear engine was Al Bundy. Really? Yeah, Al Bundy.

Really? Yeah, he cast him, he wanted to cast him, it's Ed O'Neal. He wanted to cast Ed O'Neal because he did a show called Big Apple with him, it was a cop show. And he's like, this guy's a real fucking actor and he doesn't get it,

which I guess people later found out, Modern Family, but he wanted to cast him, and he wrote Swear Engine for him. And HBO said no. I sure was like, look, he's a TV guy, where HBO, it's not happening. He's all bundy. Then they cast Powers Booth as Swerging. He got sick, I guess, of what eventually killed him. And so they had to have auditions

again. And he goes, and that's how we found what's his name? I mean, how crazy is that? Yeah, pretty fucking crazy, bro, dude. What the fuck are we talking about? Uh, married with children. Oh, you're watching married children. It holds up, doesn't hold up. Some killer episodes, right? There's some great episodes.

Yeah. Yeah. And then there's like, it's amazing to like the shit that like by today's barometer, like me too stuff. Like there's a, there's a, I think even the office fails that, right? Yeah, probably. Sure, probably these days.

Everything made before 2017. Yes, it is. Evil. It's to be jettisoned into the sun. Could just watch like, I guess she hulk over and over again. She hulk. Yeah, I know. I know she.

Um, either. But, uh, yeah, all right. So, so, all right. So we got the painting. So I'm on your side. I still think you could do it. You should do it just because I want to see this. The final outcome on this.

But I, you know, side. I still think you could do it. You should do it just because I want to see this the final outcome on this, but I, you know, yeah. I mean, two hours though, man, I've got my picture taken. It's like, I'm not feeling the greatest about myself and I'm supposed to be striking poses and fucking vulgar all over the place. Are you gonna ask me to folk? I'm not doing it. I will not find one one fucking vote.

Get your camera ready. Is that you bring the kid? Is she going to be in the I don't think she's in it. No, it's only you know, two. I think it's two people. Because it was like the the thing she saw on Instagram or wherever the fuck she saw Yeah, that she entered and won Was yeah, like New Jersey couples. Oh

What if her and Sage went I Would be fired with that. I don't think she would be your name's Paul my friend She gets between the mouth. Yeah, I can't wait to see this painting Yeah, all right. I'll post it for everybody to see. Do that over. Follows my directions. I'm gonna look like Brad Pitt. Shit, what do we got? All right, so you want to do phone calls, huh? Yeah, we do some phone calls here. All right. Only four people responded looking for advice, which means I guess a lot of people are doing very well in life

They don't need our advice or we've given such shitty advice. Yeah, they've listened to the show before and they're like this is unreal Like this shouldn't be allowed We gave good advice. I thought so, but you know, I mean not everything. I mean, you know there's some duds over the years of course, but overall Overall come on I think we're doing all right. Let's see. Okay. So I'm going to call this guy Bob. Bob. Yeah. All right. And here's his problem. He's been helping a close friend with his finances for a couple of years now. And with his help, this guy's, Bob's, he's managed to get in a much better place

in terms of financial security in his future. For the past six months or so, he's begun to backslide into his spending behaviors as well as his participation in my accounting work with him. So he's spending more and not spending time with this guy doing his accounting. I probably spent an hour or so week working on his finances and he spends effectively zero hours. I need advice. I start charging on money for my help so he doesn't take it for granted and is more motivated to work with me to make that worthwhile or should I ditch this,

his loveable dumbass, let him get himself into a financial mess again. I really care about his future in happiness, but I don't want to feel like I'm the only one carrying, and this is, and the only one trying to do anything about it. I definitely don't have time to be wasting if things don't change. All right, so. All right. Everybody knows the issue. I won't lie. It wasn't very sexy.

You know, I could just start talking about that grandma again in the middle of it if we want to sex it up. Okay, we'll mention her. All right, let's listen up. Hello. Hey, this is Brian Q. And for the, for the purposes of anonymity, you're going to be Bob. Bob.

Yeah, it took me a while to come up with that. But, codename Bob. Hello, Bob. Hello, how are you? I mean, let's say, what's his real name? Out of the way. No, it's fine. Let me take my, your book out here.

See if he can hear me. Can you hear me, okay? Yep. Awesome. Yeah, Bob is fine. Okay. So he's a real radio voice. Sure.

I was like, I was like, what's that? I see. I used to, I used to have a radio show back in a day and I did some announcing work and stuff, but no, I just have a big face, big mouth. Wow. But you were a professional. Well, I mean, that was like 35 years ago, Yeah. He's still got it. Yeah. Thank you Yeah, I like I wonder about guys like this who have these types of voices and like a C-Mont TV

Or see them in movies and you're like, do they really talk like that to people in real life? Like and there's the answer. Yeah, Bob's ripping it out on us, keeping it real. Yeah. Yeah. Sometimes it sound like a little, winy person, but not usually when I'm on the phone. I just want to listen to him talk. Yeah.

Well, you're about to, because all right. Okay, we read your problem. This is how long have you been doing this for? For this particular guy, it's been at least a couple of years, maybe three years. And how, wait, you just started doing it? I started doing it three years. How did that kindness of your heart?

Yeah, I actually, I mean, I've always been a numbers and spreadsheets and math kind of nerd guy. And I've always kind of taken care of my finances, but a few years ago, I found, you know, a real love of using this particular budgeting tool. And just it changed, you know, kind of changed my financial security just by, you know, giving me control of what I was spending on. And I had this buddy. He was the first person I started helping who he was in a lot of debt, made decent money, but just was a spending idiot. And so I started helping him. And now I help maybe somewhere between six and 10 people most of the time, rich people, poor people, you charged

for this? No, no, I'm like a volunteer, but that's kind of why I like it, because there's- Please tell me you're not- I'm not telling it at least. No, no, I don't even have access to the funds. No, it's really just like, I've never- Like, I've never heard of like a whole thing. Yeah, like financial helpers who just help us.

To have fun. Yeah, I've never heard of such a thing. Yeah, because it feels good. It's the first time I was ever like, ooh, I would like to retire and just do this. The reason the reason I need to do frame in prison, man. Yeah, actually, yeah, that feels pretty good. Yeah, just do it every day's taxes. So maybe they get like a couple of beers on the roof or some shit like that. Yeah, yeah. What's it just, it's the first time I ever felt like I was really helping people. Like it's different than just giving money or whatever.

Like, wow, I've changed people's lives. And people you know, or is this through an organization? No, it's just, it's just my buddies. Like this, this one guy, you know, the guy I kind of wrote about is, is a good friend and someday I do a podcast with and and you know, he's just one of the the ones I've enjoyed the most because he really needed needed to help and you know, he's done he's done really, really great. But it's a like it's the type of thing that nobody would do such

a crappy job of teaching people the basics, you know, this isn't complex stuff. It's don't spend money, you don't have, right? Don't, don't put money on a credit card if you can't pay it off when the bill comes. It's not hard. But this is what you sit down with them and that's what you say to them. Well, yeah, but more than that, like I use this program, this website, YNAB, that gives you, like you just kind of hook it up to your accounts and all your money flows through it and it lets you just see what you're spending money on. All your friends are comfortable with you knowing their finances and inside and out. Yeah.

Well, not all of them, right? It's a select set of people. And it sounds so weird. I can't wrap my head around this one. You're so far out in the fucking weeds, man, that I can't even see your problem. So the guy is, is, so what's so, yeah, that, I mean, that's the general stuff. I love doing this love helping people but this particular one I mean it is a weird thing

right because it does put you you know some of the people I'm literally like in their shorts of everything they spend and other people I just check in every week or month or something like that he's one of the people where I'm literally his day by day account I can't wrap my head up. Yeah. I'm like losing focus because I'm like, I don't understand. Like, so do you still want to do it? You don't want to do it anymore? I totally want to do it. What's getting frustrating is he's kind of, are you married? I am. I am married. And you're wife's okay with you spending all this time

working on other people's stuff? Well, I mean, not. She understands it's a hobby that means something to me, but yeah, it does bugger when, you know, when I'm, you know, getting on a Zoom with somebody and doing their finances for a few hours on a Saturday morning or something. She's not always sold with it,

but she's pretty supportive. How long have you been married? 20 plus years. I see. Wow. Okay. So you've been married 20 years. It's like the most unusual hobby I've ever heard of. It is, but then you hear about the marriage. Has the marriage generally? We are, you know, we're not divorced. You've been married. We have two great smart kids, teenagers, and have a very good lucky life. We are good roommates. Yeah.

Then I would be like, if that were the case, then I'd be like, leave me alone. Let me do my, let me do my, let me do my hot-hmm. Yeah. Then I would be like, if that were the case, then I'd be like, leave me alone. Let me do my, let me do my, let me do my hot-o. No, she's, no, she's, I gotta escape you somehow with that means looking at the spreadsheet and so be it. Yeah. No, she, I mean, she's, I got her into it.

She's, she's now helping her parents. Do their finances the same way that I'm, I'm feeling that you wouldn't do her parents. Yeah. Well, no, I have. It's like your friend's share about my end loss. Well, no, no, no, I'm totally in it. But it was a way for her to learn, like, now she's

into it the same way I am, even though she would never believe me about, you know, she didn't understand it. And now she's like analyzing all this crap. And it's like, oh, a transaction came in. I don't know what I wrote this check for. And it's just kind of, I gotta tell you. And this hasn't brought you closer together. It has actually, it absolutely has.

It's been good for us. I can't hide anything from her advice first. There's nothing to like make fun of here. Like everything sounds. Well, the fun is because I am an idiot, right? I'm doing it. I'm doing it for three. I get no money from it, though I clearly enjoy it. But really, this is less about the the weirdness of what I'm doing, then I have a buddy who I've really been helping out for a week for three years now. And he is, he's stressed out. Obviously, pandemic's been rough for everybody, but he's kind of backsliding and

starting to spend the way he used to. What is he spending on? When he got action figures, autographs, bullshit hair. Yeah. Hair. figures, you know, autographs, bullshit hair hair. I was, I was the way I'm Bob. I did spend yesterday evening on a couch with Jimmy the hair guy. I want to have a good time with Providence. Oh yeah. Yeah, but I have not spent too grand on hair. Wow. I mean, but you want to keep doing it. So what's the, what's the, what's the, what's the, what's the burying you sad to be on?

But I'm helping other people all the time, right? So I can get this enjoyment help in other people. I'm trying to decide whether I cut him loose, knowing that he's going to do worse financially without me helping him. But I will at least not feel like I'm being like he's not holding up his end of the bargain. Like it's not fair. Heavy said, like it is a weird thing. Yeah, I mean, I haven't I haven't brought it to a head at this point because I'm really trying to help. You haven't, because I haven't. Yeah, I haven't. No, no, I haven't.

Oh, come, because he does, he needs help. But ultimately, like anything, he's got to help himself. I'm here to help him if he's willing to help. But he's kind of, can I ask? How could he help himself? Well, stuff like, he doesn't, like, it's all about actually tracking what you spend, which means you either need to have those transactions come through your bank or you need to manually enter them on your phone or on a computer or

whatever. And he's like five or six months behind on his checking accounts. So I have all his credit card stuff, but basically I'm working with less and less accurate data while I can see that he's spending his ass off. I so I can't believe there are three book keepers out there. It's so weird. I have the fucking name. I know it's a I mean, maybe the thing is like, there's no, like if I'm doing it for my friends, they know I'm making nothing off of it, right? I have no access to their actual money. All they have to do is put up with some, you know, okay. I mean, I can see what they're making. Stuff like that. All right, I think I have a possible solution for you. All right. That's going to make you happy.

We'll get you out of this. All right. Just tell this friend, this solution for you here. All right. That's gonna make you happy. We'll get you out of this then. Just tell this friend, this long head. Just tell him, look, look, I'm happy to keep doing this for you. But I need up to the date information or it's a waste of time. And I don't want to waste my time. So I'll tell you what I'm gonna do. Next month, we're gonna schedule it for the end of the month.

And if you have everything in it at that time,'ll do it and if not we're not gonna do it And throw right on him now. It's completely on him. Yeah to do it. Yeah, and then ignore it until he reaches out to me or Let's get that. Okay. Yeah, I like it. I think that is it's totally fair because like you can't do your job properly So what's the point you're wasting your time to do your job? But it's also fair because I'm not sitting here fighting with him in my brain. I'm literally putting out there saying, Hey, man, I'm here for you. But it's all right. It's all on him. Now what's that means? You're going to have to spend another hour or two with your wife a week.

Are you sure? Are you ready for that? That's not it. That's not a problem. Sure. Yeah. Absolutely. Thank you, absolutely. Okay. Thank you, Professor Q. I think that actually does help. That was a pretty wise words, Q. Yeah, I agree. Yeah, just throw it on them.

He's just always throw it on a fuck up, cause they'll fuck up and turn you out of it. Yeah, it's in their nature. Yeah, I should know. Right, that means it's, yes. So you've given me an out where I can feel okay with it. Yeah, I should know. Two, right. I mean, it's, yes. So you've given me an out where I can feel okay with it. Yeah, it does, right? You don't like to see a buddy fall, right?

No, of course. Well, sometimes I need a little spank. Yeah, no, I like it. Thank you guys. All right, bud. I'm very helpful. Nice talking about you two, these assholes. Do you get easy?

Okay. Good advice, Q, I think. I think so too, man. It gives them an inner warrant out. Because if the guy does what he wants to do, then he's in and he doesn't, he's out. It's great. So win, win.

That's what you're looking for in life. Win, win. Or at least win. I tell you what, I'm not looking for for in life win win or at least win I tell you what I'm not looking for in life is to be sitting around the Saturday morning for two hours on a zoom with my friend going over his fucking gasser seats It sounds like such a boring hobby This comes from somebody who has no hobbies I'm playing this video game now. All right. I'm playing this video game now called ship breaker I'm playing this video game now. All right, I'm playing this video game now called ship breaker.

And it takes place in the far future. And all the point of the whole game is you work at a shipping a starship yard, scrapyard. And the same background every game, it's like the location doesn't move. But every the start of every round, they bring in a derelict starship. And then you go through the starship and you aim your laser at these, like cut points, and then you just dismantle the starship. And then you take the pieces and, and if it's like something that they could resell, like a chair or a light, you put it into this reselling salvage bin. If it needs to be melted down, you shoot it into the furnace. And if it needs to be processed, you put it into this reselling salvage bin. If it needs to be melted down, you shoot it into the furnace.

And if it needs to be processed, you put it in this blue light, that's a processor. That's the fucking entire game. That's it. And you just sit there and it's like, it's the same thing over and over again. Even if the ships look different, once you get inside, they're the same.

It's just cutting these yellow cut points over and over again. I gotta tell you, man, it's more exciting than working on financial work for like friends. Yeah, and it's cool. You can kind of get into it a little bit. Like I've played a few nights in a row now and I'm a joy, very peaceful.

So, but like that to me, it sounds boring, but it's not. So maybe that's what this guy's thing is. Do you think like Bob is some kind of weird warrior? It's like for him, it's not about like seeing a naked lady or a naked couple. It's about seeing like, ooh, he just fucking, he bought a Starbucks.

Maybe. Gets that thrill off it. Yeah. I think then I can correct him later on. Yeah, I can shout him. Yeah. Why did this asshole spend 25 hundred on a portrait? His wife slipped me a note saying that she won it.

In quotes. I'm poor. Can't wait to see this. Oh, your Christmas garden. Actually, you're on the other hand is take. Did you do Christmas cards this year? No. Okay.

So next year, I'm surprised maybe about didn't do that. She always wants to, but then like, suddenly it's Christmas. And then she's like, oh shit. But she said, shutter flies been fucking up a lot. This though. Yeah. This portrait, that's Christmas card. It's gotta be a Christmas card.

I would love it. Oh. I'm not gonna paint a fucking, showcase my humiliation. I'm just like, why is he so skinny at this? What did they paint this? They run out of paint? No, the amps are painted in. Yeah.

Otherwise, he dressed like Aquaman. I guess is my main question. I love it. All right, what do we got? Do we got a more juicy? Well, there's only four, right? There's only four and two people didn't answer me when I, all right, so this might be our final.

This could be the final question for the year. There's the last episode of the year. Okay, I like this. I think we really helped the Bob, so this feels good. Can it please be juicy? It could be. Okay, I think it could be. Question is mostly for Q.

Q, you have been platonic friends with Stacey forever. I'm in a similar situation. It would like some advice on how you've done it for so long. She and I have been friends for several years and we have considered going to the next level, but that probably won't happen. I do care about her and want what's best for both of us. The other side of my problem is that my friends and family feel like I'm being taken advantage of. My family is met her once. She's one of my few close friends who I can trust and hang out with. I've weighed several pros and cons of continuing this friendship. The cons, having one or two more on the bad days.

Oh, this is an interesting one. Yeah, this could be. I want to know why he feels he's being taken advantage of. Yeah, that's what I want to know. Yeah, what's this bitch doing? There's money. There's money on the table then. Oh, you think, okay, we're going to call this guy. We're called Sam. Sam. All right, hopefully he picks up.

Hello. Hey, it's Brian Q for purposes of anonymity. You're going to be Sam. Okay. My name is your name Sam. No, it's not. Okay. All right. All right. Good. You know who this is, right? I surprised or yeah, you got a good walk up or something all right We we read your problem And Q's ready to dispense with some sage advice. I can do my best here Can you can you lay it out for me like I'm curious as to why I need some I need some Work here. How how old you how well is she how long you've been friends? Why did your family think she's taking advantage of you? We're both 34 years old. How long you know each other?

About six years now. Okay. Okay. Yeah, we've been friends off and on. Like we took a small break early. Why? Just being friends. Like I just figured like I kind of needed to figure out if I wanted to keep being friends with her. We kind of did on, we kind of know how to push each other's funds to irritate each other. So sometimes we just kind of like bicker back and forth, but then we kind of take it to the next level and then feelings get hurt and then we kind of have to go to our separate corners for a minute to kind of cool off and then come back together and hang out for a while. Then last year, I felt like she was putting up walls between us, like she was kind of

distancing herself from our friendship and I didn't figure out why until, and I said listen, like until we get the stuff that kind of figured out, I kind of need to take a break from her, because my feelings were getting involved. Like, I have feelings for her often on and she's had feelings for me often on, just never at the same time. Have you guys hooked up?

No, it's never gotten physical. Why? We just know, haven't been in that same mindset, like it feels like um, well, I just, I, it could only because I've like Stacy even aside, like, like I've been friends with, also like, like with lots of girls over the years and like, like I've been friends with you also like like with lots of girls over the years and like usually what happens is like, you know, you hook up, you know, at least once or twice just for the fucking goofy fun of it. And then when they get a boyfriend, you kind of lose them for a few years then they break up with their boyfriend, they come back, you start hanging out again that that's a pretty good system. That's not what you're operating on there. Well, it kind of actually turned out to be that way.

Ah-ha! Especially with her. I've never had like a long-term romantic relationship with somebody. Why? I've been so self-conscious with like body image and just never really kind of been confident myself. And I've been working on that a lot.

I've been seeing a counselor. That's great. Yeah, yeah, and it's helped out a lot. And so I've joined a singles dating group. That's where I met her. And throughout the course of this, she's had several boyfriends from thatating group. That's where I met her. And throughout the course of this, she's had several boyfriends from that singles group. But for whatever reason, I just haven't put myself out there enough. But she's stated she's had those feelings for you at points. Yeah, yeah, like,

where she's just unsure, like if a romantic physical relationship would be good for us. It's weird that like I don't have many female friends. So it's hard for me to judge this one. Maybe that's why you know, because you do have some long term platonic but like I'm friends with Jordan. Sure, but there's no chance of me because it's my friend's wife. Yeah, that's a different relationship. Right. Just having a series of female friends. Do you get like when she does have a boyfriend? Do you feel like jealous or do you not care? I get kind of irritated like that.

She like the problem I've had with her boyfriends is with a couple of them. She hasn't told me that she actually was seeing somebody. Why? Because I don't know if it's she was afraid of hurting my feelings. If she was like afraid of judging me or not judging me, but like, of me judging her. One of them, we were hanging out so well for like six months and then we planned on going to the New Year's Eve party together and then she was like, oh, hey, yeah, I'm going to get ready at his house.

And I was like, oh, maybe it's just somebody she met you know as a common friend. She definitely like that day she was touched. Yeah so we go to the party and I'm like oh hey it's nice to meet you and he's like yeah I've heard so much about you and I and I flat out said I I don't know who you are I don't know anything about you and I, and I flat out said, I, I didn't, I don't know who you are. I don't know anything about you. Well, that pissed her off. And, and so I told her I was like, how, you kind of blindsided me with you've seen somebody for six months without even telling me like that's, I thought

her friendship was better than that. Yeah. And it turned out to like, like the second time we stopped talking, she was seeing an old boyfriend of hers for a couple of months. And that's when I felt like we were going apart again. And she didn't even tell me then after I said, listen, we need to take a break again, because I need to, you know. What, can I ask why your family

thinks she's taking advantage of you? A lot of it, I think just has to deal with like if we go out. Then I usually pay for stuff like she's she's a doc she's a not a I don't know how much but. Um her gigs are sporadic like her her jobs are like not a full-time job so she travels a lot. jobs are like not a full-time job so she travels a lot. She's trying to get a couple of companies up the ground. And so it feels like if I want to hang out with her, it's always like the top three things with her. It's just money. And so it's like because I have a decent job and I like hanging out with her, I'm like, well, thank for a meal and a concert ticket or a meal in a movie every once in a while this year.

Sure, it's your money. I think I'm entitled to spend that however you want. I wouldn't necessarily say you're being taken advantage of. Right, yeah. But when times come up, when it's like choice between hanging out with family or going to hang out with her and sometimes those complete, I choose her over family and friends because Like my plans with her are so hard to get together because of her job and stuff and my job. That's like if I get a seer for a few hours and I can see my family anytime, I can't see her necessarily all the time. So I want to hang out with her more than hang out with family.

Well let me ask you something, what are the positives of this relationship? We have the same kind of humor. We like a lot of the same music. We kind of like going out to hang out together, try different things. We go hiking. We like a lot of the same food. Should I tell them Steve Dave listener? No.

We got her answer. I'm sorry. I've been trying, yeah, see, I've been telling people more about you guys and how have you helped out a lot. And I'm, so I don't want to cut you off, but I got to ask, have you seen her in a bathing suit? I've seen her in underwear.

Oh, has that looked pretty good. Any tattoos? It's always in, yeah, I mean, it's always in, huh? Any tattoos? Not that I can remember. I mean, I, I mean, you do remember. Yeah, I mean, it's leading glances from like, if she, if we, she hangs out overnight

by hanging out in her place overnight, then it's just like, oh, she's running from like the shower to the bedroom. Oh, she knows what she's doing. She knows exactly what she's doing. Exactly what she's doing. Yeah. And one of my friends has said that like she,

she's doing this because she knows I'm a safe person. And so like she doesn't want to risk that safety net on having me because she's told me to like, and I like her, one of her boyfriend's was like emotionally distant. And so I think she was using me as that emotional part of that relationship with her boyfriend. Yeah, I've seen this before. Yeah. Yeah. It's also something, you know what, dude, I think I formulate an opinion of you. So is it So would you, you would call this guy an emotional friend then? I don't think that this friendship is beyond saving,

but I think you gotta make some fucking hard moves and you gotta make himself a little more dangerous. He can't be so safe. I think he's gotta get out of it for a while, get, start seeing a girl, and not tell her. And that, no, I think that a lot. That's how I can, what's up? Oh, like when Brian said, yeah,

I don't have to tell her about it. Like it kind of does, like the tip or tap thing, I get that. No, no, no, no. This is, don't listen to him on this one. This is, this is not the relationship you're supposed to have with your friends is not a tit for tat thing, like getting revenge on each other in a cycle.

Like, and by the way, you're losing. I hate to break it to you, bud, but you're losing. Like she, I don't think she's going to concentrate to going out to dinner. Like I don't think she's taking advantage of you, but like in the balance of things overall, she's getting good dick somewhere else. She's getting you to take her out.

And so again, I don't think she's being manipulative in that way. I think it's probably fine that you pay for her and all that shit. But like, you need to, this is, sounds, whatever you think of her. And I don't think she's a bad person. I'm not here to tell you she's piece of shit or anything like that. But I think that you guys are trapped in a cycle. You're not going to win her over this way at all. You're never going to get her if you keep going down this path.

You got to get out. You got to take a break from it from whatever for whatever you have to do it. You got to find someone else a girlfriend, this one shit like that. Go in that direction for a little bit and then bring it back to her and then you know, then then call her up, drop her email, something, but just doing what you're doing is not going to work. Because I'll tell you what, bro, eventually she doing what you're doing is not gonna work because let's say you want for Eventually she's gonna find the boyfriend that she's fucking really into and that she has a really good relationship with and then Your phone's gonna stop it. I mean you're done, bud. Yeah, you fucking cooked And it's not because if she's using you and it's not because of anything it's because like if you're with someone that you really like

There's limited time because you just want to be with that person. It's so your days are numbered completely with her. Unless you start seeing someone else, I don't want to say it gets a little bit jealous because that's not what we're doing here, but it makes her reassess the whole situation and reassess you, you know, and hopefully by then this other person that you're seeing you just fucking

like anyway, but let's be honest, it'll probably fall apart because most relationships do. And then you'll have been reassessed by this one girl. But I will tell you this, whether that works or not, doing what you're doing will not get you the girl. It just will not. It never will. It never did.

Never has historically never has. And it never will. It just won't because why would it? If she wanted to fuck you and jump your bones, you don't think she would have done it when she was running from the shower to the bedroom half naked. Like women, you know, they have ways of letting that be known. She hasn't done it yet. It's been years. So she doesn't have an interest you in that way so it's like what do you know? What do you do? And you have to rely on her word for like, oh, I was interested in you but now I'm not Right, you know, right. Great point. Great point Yeah, I mean like look like with with at least like forget about all the jokes we said about Stacey on the Oh on the air over the years like

I mean she made it very clear that she was not interested in me. You know, and it was up to me to be like, hey, man, that's, that's fucking cool. You're not able to do that because you're feelings. You know what I'm saying? Yeah. Yeah. You put yourself in a situation where where where they're all you're doing is hurting yourself because you're fucking the situation where you have feelings for someone. You gotta get out of it. And not forever, it sounds like a worthy person in your life, but you can't.

I mean, you gotta kinda separate and go in another direction. I think the therapy's great. You're a young man, early 30s of the greatest time of life. I thought 30s were fucking awesome. 30s are pretty kind to you, right? Pretty fucking kind. Like your body hasn't started breaking down yet But you're a little wise, you know, you're a little wiser. You're a little older. Look, you went therapy. I bet you didn't go in therapy in your 20s, right? You were in your 30s?

Yeah, it was like right when I hit 30s. I was like, I kind of need to get out of this depression that I had this route that I built for myself for my 20s. that I built for myself. You're on the brach and brach and quinn path. Yeah. That's a success. From 20s to 30s, that's my exact thing. But like where as at least my female friends, the boundaries have always been clear. We're gonna get drunk and we're gonna fuck everyone

once in a while or we're not, right? I've had that, like a version of those relationships with all my female friends over the years. And the roles were very defined. Everybody was happy what was going on. Otherwise, it doesn't work. And that's not what's going on with you. So it's not working.

Yeah, you're right. I mean, without having those boundaries, I've always been in that weird state of unsure. Right. And that's not, that doesn't make you like stupid or anything. That's fucking every guy. But, but you are denying yourself opportunities and you're denying yourself growth in different directions because of this woman. And you can't do that to yourself anymore because while you are in your early 30s and you're

still young, the clock is also ticking. It's good. Like right now, I was 30 once. I was 30. You can do it. Like dude, you gotta fucking, you're already aged out of 23 year old girls and shit like that. That'll be so fun. Well, not all of us have TV shows for it. So it's like, but you have an age out of girls like 27, 28,

so I don't know, man, I would just like, start throwing that net out and like having a good time and just cutting it off. Not in an angry way, not in a fucking fucking way, just for yourself, you've done it before, you told me you guys broke up and went in separate directions and she's out fucking these guys, you fucking animals all over the town.

Rub it in your face, rubbing it in your whole family nose. Yeah, face. She is, man. Yeah. Oh, it's like, I mean town. Rub it in your face. Rub it in your whole family nose. Damn face. She is, man. Oh, it's like I mean fuck. I kind of thought I'm asking you. Yeah. Yeah. Listen to me, people treat you the way you allow them

to treat you, right? Right. All right. So what are you going to do? Take a break from her. Take a break, man. Go in other directions, and it'll be good for you. You don't have to get a, you know,

Mopi about her broken up about it. You're already saying like, I'm not cutting her off a life. One day we'll get back on the same path, but I gotta go and work on myself a little bit. I think that's gonna pay off dividends for you bro. And I guarantee you that that's the only path to getting in her fucking pants.

Yeah. You could of people are right people around about like the repetitive behavior that you've had going for the past couple of years, only results in the same thing. Yeah. Yeah. Definition of insanity. You're insane, son.

What does he call him? Deadwood, you're cut struck. Yeah, you're a cut struck. Yeah. Like an Al-Swearer, too. and then you're like, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say,

I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say,

I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say,

I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, Download that ship breaker game, man. What do you got PlayStation? Realistence your favorite episodes to tell them Steve Dave. Yeah, you got an Xbox you smoke weed. Oh Fucking shit. Oh, well look. I got you fucking nice You download the ship breaker game you smoke a fucking fat ball. You sit there and you disassemble ships What I like to do sometimes is put some pink Floyd on the fucking radio while I do it. I don't know man You're not you're not gonna miss our you know in that scenario No, you're true man. That's so true. Yeah. I get back to us. Let us know how it goes. Oh For sure guys, I will thank you so much. Oh, no problem. See Prisch appreciated all guys and I mean don't like I said, this last year, man has been really rough on me.

I had some cancer scare that I'm dealing through. Oh, fuck. Oh, no. Yeah. She didn't fucking give you any, when you would do cancer. Yeah, really, man. I know. Right.

I mean, I've gotten, I've taken pity folks before. I don't care. I was told girls I had cancer. You can just lie. They'll believe you a lot of the time. I was told girls I had kids. You can just lie. They'll believe you a lot of little. You know, the show blood tests. Right.

Well, I can definitely show on this. I don't have a ball because of it. Oh, fuck, man. Well, did you tell her that? Yeah. And she didn't want to see it? No. Goddamn.

How'd she react? Like she, I mean, it was like, oh, that sucks. You know, how'd she react? Like she, I mean it was like, oh that sucks, you know, if you didn't say anything, you know. Oh dude, like now you're fucking actual fucking balls are getting affected and she need me to give a fuck. She's got no plans to go there. Jelding.

Yeah, she doesn't know. You're literally ballless in her eyes. Yeah, she's like, what's the big deal? Yeah. You weren't going to use them anyway. Yeah. Yeah, she's like, what's the big deal? Where can he use them anyway? Yeah. Oh, damn dude. All right, it's been broken down now. Yeah. Good job, Q. Hey, man, I just, I think he's in a good spot. I think he's in a better spot than he thinks he is. And you just got to follow the path away from this girl. Stick with the therapy. I think you're going to be great. Right on that. Thank you so much guys for taking my question. No problem, let us know how it goes.

Oh for sure guys, and I'll keep on listening and thank you guys. All right brother. Thanks a lot. Take it easy. Thank you guys, have a good day. You too man. Not bad. Successful.

Successful. I feel we gave him the correct advice. Yeah. Where what else else what other direction could you go? Like I've, I've, there's nothing because she's pulling the like the brother card, you're like a brother to me. No, she's not because she's telling them that, oh, magically, when you weren't interested in me, I was, yeah, you're right. Yeah, you're right. That's, that's the manipulation, whether

it's true or not, it's like a very manipulative thing to say, why don't you say that shit when you're interested in me. I was interested in you. Yeah, you're right. That's the manipulation, whether it's true or not, it's like a very manipulative thing to say. Why don't you say that shit when you're interested? Right. Because he's always interested. Yeah. I'll give fuck. Yeah, like why'd you keep it to yourself?

Yeah. He's always interested. Show me the guy, the single guy that's not interested in having sex with a girl that he described is looking good. Looking good is willing. It's like, what are we talking about? I can't even really were entertaining this nonsense.

She's got to go. I wish we had a picture of her. I really would like to see what this, like this, she's rope and open. I'm sure to blast it out or Instagram. Yeah. Her grandma called her boyfriend on the air. Wow. All right, man.

I think that went pretty well. I think so too. Yeah. And we miss Walt. Well, we'll talk to him after the new year. We'll see everyone else over the new year. And we can say, Mary Christmas, because this is dropping on the 25th.

Oh, shit. Special little Christmas gift, too. Mary Christmas, guys. And, you know, as always, thank you. Do we have anything we want to say thank you to the audience? Do we ever do that? I don't think so. But we should.

We should because I, because they're very important to me and you. You? You know, of these guys? Yeah. He's not gonna head. I rarely meet a listener that I don't like. Right.

Because everybody's like kind of like, like, like, my dude, you know? We're like, we get it. Yeah, everybody's like kind of like, like, my, did you know? We're like, we get it. Yeah, everybody's just kind of chill. There's no reason to get upset about shit, I guess. But, man, I just fucking love the ants. I just do. And it's knowing that I'm able to come on air

and like talk about shit that's bothering me is kind of really therapeutic. Yeah, I know. Oh, yeah, definitely. Yeah. If we go two weeks, I'm like, I start like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like just like I don't know it's like I don't know I just feel very At ease and at myself whenever recording for the ants. Yeah, that's nice. It is yeah, I like a fucking long journey man 12 years 12 years. I remember doing the first space monkeys and the view skew offices. Oh Shit

That was a light we brought my my niece to that concert. Oh my God. Man, what a trip and it's nowhere in sight. No, not for me anyway. I hope not. Yeah, I love doing it. I love doing it. We love you. There's a big love fest. Yeah, really been eating animals. Very, not any very, very, very, very, very, very, lovey-dovey. Yeah, I'm trying to match your level of lovy doviness. Yeah, I just, you know, it's always like a point, it's I'm proud of telling Steve Dave in a way that I'm not with anything else. It's great. So thank you guys and happy new year. Peace assholes.