Tell Em Steve-Dave - #550: The Secret

Episode Date: March 19, 2023

Bry is vindicated, Q celebrates his birthday week, Git ‘em reveals his perfect woman, Ming’s first stand up set is reviewed.

Hey, it's Brian. I forgot to mention this in the show proper, but I wanted to let you know that I'm gonna be on my buddy Vitty Polino's podcast. It's called The Creep Off. I think it's on YouTube on Monday and then later on Monday it'll be available wherever you get your finer podcasts. So check it out. We talk about Seeroo Killers, Creeps, Bad Guys, all that kind of stuff. bad guys all that kind of stuff. Is it cock-sucking music? I said, let me see. Radiohead was cock-sucking music? Not radiohead. Yes, you did.

We're not going to bend the knee to those motherfuckers, fuck them. Actually, Comrade. Tell them Steve Dave. Hello and welcome to this week's edition of Tell them Steve Dave. I'm here with Walt. Chellow. And I am here with a BQ hello live in studio in studio. Mm-hmm. I might have to keep this one a little tight boys this episode Yeah, why sick wife at home? Oh, man. I came here. You would not believe what hours to kill today. Oh really? Yeah Tell me she could have me back around five. She'll be fine five o'clock. She'll be fine

You would you would not believe the sounds coming from this bathroom. I had to turn the TV up. We should, are you okay? I'm fine. You're, I'm totally fine. So you're Brian Nightingale? A little bit, yeah. Yeah, what are you doing?

And net roll is nurse. Making soup, getting great juice. And sage was sick. Not yes, yeah, she was sick yesterday. So I had to take care of her to the both of them. Fucking doing it all, man. I know. Man, I'm many hats.

Yeah, but now sage is okay today. So she got shipped off to her mom's house, but Mary Beth is still sick. She was gonna go to the hospital last night that's how bad it was. She was like, first. She's stomach pained. I think it's just a stomach virus.

So that's been going around. Yeah, that's where I- They call it a certain, it has a certain name. Get him was been going around. Yeah, that's where they call it a certain it has a certain name Get him was telling me about it like so many people have had a thank God. I haven't had again I'm gonna knock on wood fuck. Well, how do you get it because we might get it from him now? I don't know I don't know call for me and I get and I have it I Think that we've been friends for near quarter century and I haven't coughed on you once yet

been friends for near quarter century. I haven't coughed on you once yet. When you laugh, little projectiles. Yeah, I've been reading a lot about the flu season and all the wall we got to deal with. Did you hear that? They think the coronavirus came from not a lab leak. Raccoon dogs are so cool. It's back to outside the lab. They think it's a never going to never never no raccoon dogs. Now if that's true, but turns out it's raccoon dogs. China is owed a major apology and the world has to eat crow. Well, it came from their way.

Well, as long as that crow isn't diseased, but the world has to eat crow. Well it came from their way. Well, as long as that crow isn't diseased. But the world has to eat fucking crow big time, right? And go on an apology tour. I mean, are we going to war with time soon? Do we really need to give them an apology? I mean, this is big, though. I mean, we pretty much like, can we pretty much we're like, you fucking did this?

You fucked everything up. And now it's like, well, no, it's raccoon dogs. I mean, they still kind of fucked up because they shouldn't have been eating raccoon dogs. Yeah, this is what a raccoon dog looks like. I'm just cute. Yeah, it looks like a little raccoon that's as big as a dog.

Yeah. All right. Yeah, like why are you eating raccoon dogs anyway? Don't, does America have wet markets? Thankfully, no. Unless you're talking about like Chayna Town in New York maybe. Like, what is the definition of a wet market? I, I thought wet market meant like as long as fish is being sold, you know,

those like down on the docks, you know, I guess you know, it's pretty big. You go down there and there and that seafood is available. I thought that used to work. Yeah. I worked for the Fush Market for, oh yeah. When I was a teenager, I thought that would be considered. No, I mean, I mean, it was pretty sanitary. I mean, all those fish were packed and ice pretty good.

Well, it doesn't seem like it's that like, I guess it had like the name conjures up some disgusting stuff but it says, it doesn't know, I don't know why. It's a marketplace selling fresh food. Usually, I mean, it doesn't necessarily mean bad. So why would I hear wet market, do I, do I think gross? Sounds gross. Yeah, Right.

It's a marketplace selling fresh foods such as meat for fish produce and other consumption oriented perishable goods in a non-supermarket setting as distinguished from dry markets. That's so adorable. I did work on a wet market. Yeah, I guess you did. Yeah. Although they were inspecting. The new markets, fish markets, well-made markets. It's anything that's not a supermarket, but they sell perishable goods. But yeah, like you hear wet market, you're like, oh, yeah. Yeah, I wouldn't want to step within like 10 miles of a wet market, right? But I don't know, I mean, it looks like they're on the way to finding out. It was, it made the jump from a raccoon dog.

Was it a Chinese raccoon dog? Yeah. Wow, I mean, come on. It's their fucking fault no matter what. We're making things. We're not using it Americans. I can't do that. Well, this is the way to meant fences and to, you know, start to put the object in. what's your fault the matter what what's your american well this is the way to

what meant to meant fences and to you know it's start to put the olive branch out there so we don't go down the road to war you know what hey we're sorry you know we're not gonna bend the need of those mother fuckers fuck them actually comrade best gets to kneel in because they have the uh because they have the military advantage now. You hear this?

Do they? Yeah. They're bigger than us. Because we've allowed our stockpiles to go so low and then the Ukraine war depleted a lot of what we had. So like they actually have obviously not when it comes like nuclear weapons. We're still the fucking best man. You know what I mean? Fucking yeah man, we can fucking destroy this world 10 times over. Yeah, that's right. He's gonna put up your fucking wet markets. They're gonna destroy it two times over.

We're all gonna die. But I thought you were, because you gave me a lot of hope with your optimism and you always painted a picture that everything that we revealed publicly was misdirection like, our stockpiles are fucking empty. Ah! And but you know what? No way, they're fucking overflowing

with fucking death mute mutants, mutations or what's it called? Like the big artillery ammunition. Ammunition. Well, I think normally that would be the case. I would feel that be the case, but when you're this close to actual conflict and you're making yourself, you should not be making yourselves look like a pussy. You shouldn't be talking about how you don't have missiles.

And that's what we're doing. But isn't that the way to get everybody's guard down and be like, we don't want to call the curtain back. Ah! No, we have way more than you. We have way more than you. We're more now by being like, guys, look at all the fucking missiles we got.

Not like, look at our little pussies. You want to come fuck our little pussies? We do and we're going to. You're right though, we sent all our shits to Ukraine and now we're very concerned with the Ukraine's like retirement plans and shit. It's unreal. It's unfucking real. I read an article in the paper the other day, it was something about like how they want

to now send money over to fund the Ukrainians of retirement plans since I guess like their country is war torn in ravaged This other shit. Meanwhile, you got people on the streets everywhere in this fucking country. It's true Yeah, but we got a fuck a Putin. It's a fucking fucking Exactly, we got to get this guy. I do have to Issue an apology to you. To me. To Brian Johnson, who was once in a row. You know, you don't get enough credit for how many times you've been right.

Thank you. You don't. Like a lot of people don't want to give it to you. Oh, you've been on Reddit, I suppose. No, no. Nobody gives it to me there. But you know what, they're going gonna have to give it to you. They're gonna, like, just like we're gonna have to fucking, like, you know, you know, China, we're sorry, we were all wrong about that lab leak.

Oh, I'm gonna be. Like, like, bouquets of flowers, chocolates, we're gonna have to fucking do a lot to make up for how fucking shitty we were to China. But,'re gonna have people on the internet gonna have to do the same thing to you because you were right about fucking that my home's brother. My home's yes. Look at the eye, look how happy you are. The both of you. What did I say about it?

I don't know, forget about. My home's a polygist. Yeah, we kind of, we kind of like or stood up for them a home's brother who was dancing behind his brother Patrick. Oh, yeah. And then like two days later or two days before that show dropped, you know, he was caught on camera like assaulting a woman. Oh, well, kissing her against her will.

Yeah, it says here. Brother the tiktok guy. Yeah, yeah. Boy, he has a history of forcibly kissing women. So it's not just the one Let's see. Well, obviously Walt. We can't back that right yesterday when I apologize to Brian and then also take back our Yeah, we were since yeah, like we were wrong. I'm sorry Brian. Yeah, it's okay. I apologize Alright, you know you guys are you guys are good. I'm a more cynical of the three of us. So I don't give anybody the benefit of the doubt,

but you know, I thought your argument was pretty strong. It's like you have a famous brother and he's getting all the attention and you want to stand out too. So like, what can you do? Oh, I know I can do fucking five second TikTok dance like a 16 year old girl. Yeah. It worked.

Yeah. What a work to fucking idiot, which fucking sixteen year old girl. Yeah. It worked. It wouldn't work if the fucking idiot which muck is trying to kiss women against her will. It could have built an empire of closing a clothing line. Yeah, it's not that hard. It's the most sexually assaulted one. You'll be all right. He shoved his way into the owner's office. It was a restaurant.

He was in and forcibly kissed her and It says he's done it before Would I be we could cut this out if you think if it's not something that's politically correct to say but I'm shocked he was kissing women I Think that's entirely politically correct and probably if I think he's that's why he's doing it like see guys Like women. I'm super straight. I'm so straight. I got a kiss women I think he's that's why he's doing it like see guys Like women I'm super straight. I'm so straight. I got a kiss women Try and stop me I dare you

Yeah, I mean I I didn't know how long you wanted to soak in all that fucking I mean we still got 50 minutes left. I say the whole time. My old video shows him dancing out on the street before wearing before approaching a woman wearing a birthday girl sash. And then he does not hesitate to grab her an attempt to kiss her on the lips, but the woman quickly jerks her head back and laughs nervously. Patrick Mahomes, course has not commented on it yet. He hasn't waited yet. What do you do if your brother's doing that, Q? You weigh in or do you just kind of hope

it just dies down? I do not weigh in. Oh, okay. What am I going to say? You don't do a little bit of like, you know, he shouldn't be doing that. And yeah, I talked to him and... Yeah, I guess. I mean, he did go he was wrong. He's just a kid. You can get away with not saying anything, just don't say anything. Yeah. I'm asked twice before you give him an answer to my cute book. Yeah.

To title it, you can get away with not saying anything. Don't say nothing. I mean, that's fucking sound advice, right? I see only advice, man. Nobody cares what you think anyway. Like what's he said, aside from denouncing his brother's actions, what could he possibly say? Well, I think he, yeah, I think he has to denounce

that's all he can do. That's all he can do. That's why, yeah, you're right. He took the V. K. Roo and just shut up, which is good for him. It's so predictable. You're almost like why do I even need that guy to say anything because If you say something I know what he's gonna say Because he has to say What the fuck doesn't matter whether he says it or not. It's like everything is the dance man

The fucking the society wants to dance. society's got to be tired of the dance Oh, they're never seen tired of making people dance against her will oh Come on. They want to see you do the dance against you will with that pain look on your face. I saw it at the Prudentials long enough. I said please can I stop dancing? No, I saw it at the Prudential Center last week on Q's face I saw it at the Prudential Center last week on Q's face Was I'm not just saying this cuz Q's here. I'm not just saying this because of our relationship But it was if you can go to the show you should go it was so man fucking funny Like I you know like I watch watch standup comedy a lot,

like, you know, I'll laugh here and there, but this show consistently throughout there was such fucking U-turns and hard left that I was like, I did not see coming with some of these stories and they're fucking hysterical. Wow, really, really good stuff. How long is the tour going on for two? Where's the next leg start? We keep going. We'll go throughout the way. We're not going to go a bunch of new dates for the second half of the year, but we'll keep going. You know, but that's, you know, I got to give a set of credit to Sal. This is the first time we ever, when we were doing the live show, we had it when it was four of us. We had one method of doing it, like, it like great coming up the material and then when Joe left and like everything else We're like are we are we even in a tour and we kind of put Sal in a situation of like well

How do you want to do this because he's you know stand up and he's fucking really funny, right? So a lot of so the tour is a little different than it used to be there's almost no videos we used to have like right And instruction it's because of sound. He we wrote the show, which we never really did. It was it was an interesting peak. So all that all that I agree with, but that's it's all because of sound and his. Yeah. Thank you. It was really good. I was sorry that you got sick that day. Yeah, I was ready to go. Man, I I had all my details, you know, ready to roll in like VIP. Sweet parking we got. Oh yeah, parking was nice.

I just was like, I got a fever. I don't, I didn't feel horrible, but I was like, I just can't, that's, be shitty to everybody if I show up with a fever. Sick, I don't know. Sick. Thank you, let's shake hands. I didn't cough on you. Jesus. Thank you. Jesus.

Thank you. Thank you. It was another show coming up. This guy's busy as hell. Yeah, we're touring, man. We're just on the road. Where the fuck am I next? Thank you for this plug.

Green Bay, Wisconsin. Home in the cheeseheads. Miller High Life, Theatre, and Milwaukee. And then in the Chicago. Home in the Brewers. Home in the Bass. And then Rose Mine, Illinois. Chicago, basically. That's home in the Wizard and then the Brewers, and then Rose Mine Illinois, Chicago basically. It's home of the WizardCon.

There you go, bro. Oh, the old WizardCon. Back in the day. This weekend, next weekend. And I have another appearance I wanna briefly, did you say what you had an announcement? Did you get, what was the announcement? The announcement wasn't very much six months.

Oh, okay. So I can't go for like two hours. Got you got so Kevin showing the impractical Joker's movie right at the Smart Castle is a small castle the theater smart cinema cinema minima on the third March 31st and I'm gonna go I'm gonna do a Q&A afterwards. So I just, you know, guys, I never ask you for anything.

If you're on Patreon, you know, what he's talking about. Yeah, because I think people on Patreon kept this secret, like they kept the secret for the crying game back in the day. Like don't tell me. Yeah. I think people have been pretty good about it. Okay, so you're talking about the thing you revealed on iBiComics that involves Kevin. I would prefer nobody asked me about that in the Q and

A. I'll tell you what I've already had the full story. Yeah, they got the full story. They don't need to ask silly questions. So you silly bullocks you. You'd prefer not to be in that uncomfortable position on stage live. So far, Kevin, it's not even true. So he learns it for the first time. He's like, what? So I just thought of everybody could just, you know, be cool.

Be cool. Be cool about this. And, and, you know, not ask about that. And you know what he's talking, and you, if you haven't heard or you have listened, you definitely know what he's talking about. Yes. Yeah.

Yeah. What do you think the success of this is gonna be? I think pretty good. I have never been more impressed with the listeners who, never been more impressed with the listeners who, you know, they want to be given a task like this. They want to show you how loyal and how much they care and like, I just think it's something that like it's just a way for them to show you how much they love you that they're not going to ask.

Yeah. What about ball-busted bricks? How do we have any of them. Do we? You're out. You go online, you might run into one or two. I think it's gonna be smooth sailing for you. Alright, alright.

That's my guess. I really don't think that anybody's gonna ask. Okay, I like that. That's good. So I appreciate that if everybody just lets it go. Did you guys hear the news that he went cold turkey on the MJ? Yeah, I did hear that. You think, wait, you think you listen to him? I don't think I'll be years later. I don't think it was my request or my concern that made him stop.

I really don't know. I mean, I hadn't spoken to him though over the phone, but just with text for the past year. He told me he was going through some stuff, but he never mentioned that he didn't really get. He was very vague. He never mentioned like, I'm going to quit smoking, which I thought would be something that, you know, like, considering, you know, but, you know, he never mentioned that I am gonna quit smoking which I thought huh would be something that you know it considering

You know like that but you know he never mentioned that he was gonna quit smoking. Well, maybe he doesn't remember the conversation Oh, yeah, you think that it was that bad that he has fucking blackouts or pockets of Life His own admission he was high 24 or 7 right? So you think that there, I mean medically is that possible where you can have fucking blackouts or you don't remember? Yeah, 100%. Okay, well it was on tape.

It was on fucking. There was a recording list. But why? You went back and listen to it? No, but like if I could remember, you'd be like, hey man, I don't remember that at all. I'd be like, I gotta see it. Maybe they'll jog my mind.

I'd be so concerned that I had fucking pockets of my life, or I don't remember actually doing anything or speaking, I feel like I gotta see it. Maybe they'll jog my mind. I'd be so concerned that I had fucking pockets of my life, or I don't remember actually doing anything or speaking, or where I was. Well, you was concerned. That's why you quit. Oh, that's the reason? Oh, I don't know. No, we didn't tell me that, but I'm saying something made the man who loves weed more than anybody I've ever met for a decade espoused this is usand. Do you think it's a... this is you soon. Do you think it's uh you know is it a wake up call for I don't know I don't know what what your activity is lately but is it like hey man pretty minimal you know it's fairly minimal called turkey too. Yeah me and kev I want to be like him. No his and nothing

he could do would affect my decision. I don't know anything. But now for me, it was more of the expense. Yeah, it's just too much money. And I had really like stopped. So I got to grow your own chassis. Yeah, I know I stopped vaping altogether because I didn't like what it was doing to my voice. It was making it like real raspy and shit. So like actually the last day I vaped

was the day we shot Clerks 3. Like I just threw it. That's the last time you had weed? No, that's the last time I did with a vape. But like, Well, that's like, it's like smoking but not. And normally now I'll just do edibles.

Like if I do it, I'll just do edibles, which are not nearly as fun or hard hitting or quickly hitting. But what's your edible like a brownie? Yeah, well, yeah, they have like little candies and stuff, are not nearly as fun or hard hitting or quickly hitting. What's your nettle ball like a brownie? Well, yeah, they have little candies and stuff. So you get a coffee game too for one. That kind of thing.

That kind of thing. Yeah, I get a little sugar rush and then I'm high and then I just sit there and be fat. This is life. This is life. I start working with a trainer on Monday. Oh, yeah. How do you Steve, yeah.

Getting back in there. Oh, man. It's like something I might emulate. Yeah. You should do with him because over the whole pandemic, I did a little resume with him. Yeah. Yeah, and then, I mean, he only works like 20 minutes

for my house, but like it was awesome. And you have that big basement, you could set that up. Yeah. Yeah, and he's great. Yeah. And it's for, you're trying to get to something within nine months for, for, no, no, no, no, I have a personal goal or just business.

I just haven't worked out in nine months and it's like I'm starting to really feel it. My birthday was the other day, you know, the year older. So you like, I heard you had multiple parties. I heard you were fucking, dude, I was just about to say, like, my 14-year-old, I remember, I had a birthday week out. Our friend is transitioning into a 22-year-old female Gen-Zer.

Did you delete your Instagram post? I did, yeah. Why? I went to get it today so we could use it against you. Exactly. Because I saw it, I was like, what the fuck? Is this guy up to? And I so we could use it against you. Exactly. Because I saw it, I was like, what the fuck is this guy up to? And I fucking didn't screenshot it. Yeah, I put it up. It was over a few minutes, but to be fair, I was cement-headed when I did it.

Oh, okay. And then I was like, I gotta take this time, what am I doing myself? Yeah, put a crazy week. Had a party Monday. Taco truck. Had a, a taco truck. And the Captain Jack Sparrow and a personator playing beer pong with you. Mary Buff was terrified of him. Was he?

She's just like, because the second we walked in, he made a B line towards her and he goes, who do we have here? Like, I don't know if he, I don't think he knew that I was with her, but I was listening and laughing.

He was like really like moving in on her and then Helen came over and started talking and then Jack Sparrow kind of moved away but like she did not like him. Oh, but he was in character. That's what I told her. So what is the, you know, just take me through the thought process. So you're like, I want to have somebody in costume. The original plan was to have different people come out every two hours

So Captain Jack Sparrow would come out then Superman would come out. Oh, okay, so like every two hours I knew because we went from what eight till two eight till two. Yep, so I thought every two hours we'd have a character come out and then Just to prosper it, but it wasn't cost. It was like the pool of people. He didn't look like Superman. And I was like, oh, the actor showed up and you're, oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, Like the reason I like this guy is Captain Jack's cuz he looked like Captain Jack. Okay. I don't want a Superman that's like Looks like me. Yeah. Oh actually, I would take that Is this a be cute idea cuz this is so like to me. This is so unique If it's getting you all the way over there, that's a powerful

if it blasts a gas. God damn. It was, well, here's what happened is I was like, you know, my 50th birthday's coming three years. And I was like, I should probably throw a party for that. Just said random thought I had one day. And then I was like, well, why the fuck am I going to wait until I wait Until I'm 50 like why not I can't we're not shooting the TV show So I haven't seen the crew or anything in a few weeks

So I was like I just rent a bar and throw a party and it did and then like once you start thinking like that Then fun ideas to start coming in I mean would you ever think to get higher impersonators? No, no, no, it didn't occur to me. It's unique. It's fun. Yeah. It was it was a really fun party. So a lot of people that I don't normally get to see. How many? 106. Really? Yeah. It was Richard Kine came. I'm not sure. Oh, I've heard about this already. Oh, great. It's stuck in it. It's stuck in my head through the office door. Get him was obsessed with them. Yes. He was really. Yeah. He was so nervous to like go ask him for a picture.

He'd be like, I was like, ask you, kill, introduce, you don't think it's a picture, but I think he was just. I think get him told me and goes, I met Richard Kindle last night and I'm like, who's that? I think it was in this, and it's like, I don't know who he is. Because you do know who he is, he was so, he was so frustrated. I don't know who he is, I said.

I don't know who he is, I said. I'm on my own, and he said, he goes, the goldbergs, he's the guy at the furniture king and goldbergs. And I was like, oh, then I was like, he's awesome. He is awesome. He is probably the most naturally funny person that I've ever met. I was so grateful when he showed up because dude, it was like 90 degrees in there. He shows up the second he walks in.

He's like, it's hot and tall in here. So hot. Why is it so hot? Turn on the air conditioning. The air conditioning popped on. It was beautiful after the Richard kind speaks. You listen. But he said Richard kind.

I really go, I go fucking Larry from three companies. Oh, he was there. I don't know. So where did you see? You said that. Later that night, I was watching married with children and he was in the episode. I was like, that is fucking weird man.

Good old Larry. Yeah, so that was Monday. That was good. That went to 2 a.m. And then on my birthday, relatively quiet, sent out on Wednesday, I went to Madison Squaregar and John Mayer. Had a show. So when you want to see a concert, yeah, and then Thursday, the day shot you out there, did he dedicate any songs to you? No, he didn't dedicate any songs to me. Why? Why is that funny? I don't know. He never thought of John. Oh, did he not invite you? Yeah, I was there. We were at his guest. Yeah. And he didn't fuck us out. I wanted to get this a special man out there. I mean, he's a hundred guests. You can't sing me out. I don't want to. I don, he's pretty good. I mean, 100 guests, you can't. You can't sing me out.

I don't want to, I don't want to feel bad. He's dad with him. Oh, that is dad for a song. Yeah, but it's not his birthday. I mean, at the same level with his dad. Why not? It would never occur to me that John would give me a shout out from... I would fuck a chat, yeah, before my dad.

That's what I... I think probably would too. Yeah, probably. I'm not fair enough. You know, maybe my feelings are a little hurt. Maybe to rate a little email or text, you'd be like, you know, maybe next time. What kind of music would you, what is this category of music, John Mayer? Is it like pop? Is it slow? Pop rock?

Pussy rock. Oh, stop. No, he's a great guitar player. Oh, wait, but then you tell me that, is it, is it cock-sucking music? I said, let me see, radio head was cock-sucking music? Not radio head. Yes, you did. Yes, you did.

No, I'm not sure I forgot that slide. Do you think it's radio head? That's what you said it was. Radio head's cock-sucking music. I said, what? I wonder. I wonder why I had that opinion. I have no idea.

I thought it was outrageous. Well, maybe it made me- Music to suck cock by the latest album. Maybe I had my dick sucked once and while they were on the radio. Are you just fucking a quote when you hear the word head, you're just like, you'll more automatically get stopped thinking about cock sucking. Well, my second apology to Dan, I remember saying that. I just think the radio head.

Yeah, the radio head. I didn't realize that I... Why is that a negative? The way you said it, it was was like it was not chick sucking your dick Or one of us like Got the rhythm going I Got the rhythm going as we say shit just say shit on this In 12 years and then I can't keep up with all the bullshit opinions I said

And then Thursday I went to Philly I saw Bruce the boss did he invite you personally or he did not take it No, I didn't buy it take it, but I was but I was a A guess of someone on his team, but I didn't meet Bruce here I don't think Bruce knows who the fuck like Bruce doesn't know who that I exist I think you're not crazy if you don't think he's seen a club in the room with that television on and you found out a television but he did It's like two and a half hours, man. It was fucking crazy. He was so good

hours man it was fucking crazy he was so good boss boss it's my birthday was two days ago I'm so sorry to pause it's my birthday week boss he's way back I'm shouting in my ear oh that's not you big boss guy I'm out to say my big boss guy, but I have a healthy appreciation I'm probably the third time I've seen him live my life What's the one song that gets you fucking out of your seat and cue starts fucking? I just gotta be glory days man

I stopped born in the USA It's probably glory days. Got your hy in your back pocket. The rising of it. Finally, I can get that f**king that f**king banky out and f**k it twirl it. Boooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo I know you've been in a room where I'm on TV. No one is such dick to you, Bruce. If somebody gave me front row seats to the boss at Count Basie, which is 10 minutes away from me, I'd sell them to make a fucking fortune. I'd either sell them or I would just, I'd give them the cue. Why don't you get a name? Does I go to the boss? No just I'd give them the cue

No, I think that that Notariety has not been earned. I don't think it's like to me in my opinion like it's Bon Jovi is the face of Jersey Okay, and then you know when them and Bon Jovi passes then Dave windorf and then you know, when them and Bon Jovi passes, then Dave went door. No, we're not. Skipping on. Assuming Bon Jovi passes before Dave. I really, yeah, I really.

20 years is junior. I really don't know how Bruce got the fucking gig as being the Jersey fucking guy, like the Jersey rock god. Cause he named this album after Asbury Park. Yeah, but it's not he doesn't need living cold sad I don't know what sort of I mean so to be from Joby and Dave they all they don't you have the only I'm kidding them against each other is you You know what they go into a steel cage match fucking Bruce ain't coming out

He looks so stupid. Yeah, you know, I think Jovi and Dave, you know, crawl out of that cage. Oh, I love it if it was a rest stop name after Dave. What? Oh, love it if there was a rest stop named after Dave, the monster magnet rest stop. I know why not? Right. Why not? Somebody's authors. Nobody's reading books. Yeah, I think it's a shit. Everybody's listening to music though. Everybody's rocking. Yeah, I agree with you. Banzhou is my Jersey guy. Right, but Bruce 73.

Who's the most famous person that texts you for your birthday? Oh. Maybe Savo-Kano. Oh really? Banzhou, if you didn't? No, no. I thought you were like you got him into the whole fame and everything Yeah Yeah, how does how does the dude from Goldberg's end up at your party?

We're we're friends Where'd you get where did you guys meet? We met at a charity thing once and we got along really, really well and we stayed in touch and we just became friends. Brett Michaels in texture. Brett Michael, well, I don't know the thing about my birthday. Oh, you didn't let me. Yeah, I had a hint.

Yeah, no. A couple days before. Like you added them on Twitter like, hey hey, who's my birthday at Red Michaels, at Richard Kine. Scott Mosher, yeah, I would say Scott Mosher was probably the most famous. How's he done? Still great.

That's good. He's always doing great. I got up my level of fame. So next year, he was like, brides the most famous one. Yeah. I got to do something. I think the only way you can become infamous

by you ain't getting more famous. No, not happening. No. Dan Moser? You're probably, I don't know, are you more famous than Moser? I think I might be. Yeah, maybe. Yeah, he wasn't on TV.

Well, no. TV is what makes you famous, not movies. OK. You're like a bit player in a movie, people like, oh, what's you in that thing? But look, you're on TV. That's in people's homes. So it's kind of different.

They're inviting you into their homes. I'm more famous in several kind of fucking. Yeah. Oh, so so fucking funny. I'm not show man. All you guys were. Oh, yeah. I couldn't get over it.

I was talking about it the whole way home. Oh, thanks, man. Yeah. Yeah, well, he enjoyed it. He up to all our games because he spent the last few years throwing himself into the stand-up and the Approved paid off. Oh my god. He's so fucking good at it man He's and he's always quick and funny, but now he's got the nuts and bolts of it down and his style down

So when we're doing this he leveled us up by helping you know by down. So when we were doing this, he leveled us up by helping, you know, by taking us with him on that journey that he went on, which was... Is he too big to open for us if we play the Grammar Seat again? No, he'd love to do it. Yeah, he'd love to do it. Oh, I'd love to do it. Grammar Seat remains my favorite theater in like the fucking world. I love the Grammar Seat. It's great. It's funny that you've just said the Grammar Seat, because the Fuji's video that they shot there was just on the TV behind you. Oh yeah. Yeah, I was looking at it. Oh shit, that's right. Um, this dog.

This one farted on. That's fine. That's super smelly thing, man. Well, so I have, oh, since Q, yeah, you are the most famous one. I was talking to Waltz about this recently. I thought a great way to, because like Mary Beth will tell me sometimes about our demographics and stuff, and 60 and older listeners. How many people do you think are 60 and older percentage wise?

Now? Now. Okay, 40, 60. I want to go too high. Yeah. 15, 10. That's high. I wanna go too high. No. 15, 10. That's high. That's high? Okay.

3%. 3%. Yep. I just forget our audience aged a little bit over the years. Right, yeah, yeah. Precinct will be on that demographic too. Yeah. And the younger ones, you know, we really don't have a younger

audience. Sometimes you'll see some people in their 20s, you know, a couple of kids in their teens. But you have such a, in the their teens, but you have such a pub, you're in the public eye. If we could get on TikTok and you do some of these TikTok challenges, like you eat a hot chip or you let somebody slap you in the face with a tortilla, you know, like all in the name of Teller Steve Dave. Yeah. I don't know, man. You don't want to eat a hot chip. I don't really want to start jumping through hoops here, man. This isn't my place. I don't have to jump through hoops. You don't got a dance here

Dance here man. You want to put me in a dance floor? You want the 15 year old to be listening to tell us they'll find us eventually We'll start thing we'll start brainstorming some stuff. Yeah. Yeah, I don't want to take talking out No, Tick-Tock is I Hope they ban it. I hope they ban it for no other reason than to see everyone lose their collective mind when they ban it. Why would people love it that much still? It's like so, it's so popular.

It's like, it's an avenue for every teenage girl to be like, here's my mental illness. I'm depressed. I'm anxious. Everybody suddenly has Tourette's. Oh, that's a big thing now. Oh, it's huge. Everybody with Tourette's. Most of them are, there thing now. Oh, it's huge. Everybody with Tourette's. Most of them are, there's like a whole Reddit thread

dedicated to people who are faking their illnesses on TikTok. And then of course you have like the whacked out lefties, the whacked out righties, the whacked out everybody. It's just like, it's a scourge, man. Yeah, but I mean, I don't, I just stay away, stay off it. Yeah, I don't, I don't go to it. I know you're not on TikTok.

No, everyone's while I go to like Reddit, you know, I'll see somebody like, you know, a TikTok video, but people are so into it. Oh, the latest thing. I tried to get, I tried to get a petition going like, because I see it on Instagram and I did see it on TikTok. Everybody's doing that Wednesday dance to the speed, sped up Lady Gaga song. Okay. And it's like, everybody's doing that Wednesday dance to the speed sped up lady Gaga song.

Okay. And it's like everybody has to do it. So I started a petition to change.org to make it illegal. And they took it down on me. They they they said it convilated their community guidelines. But wait, what is your goal to kept people to stop doing this stupid fucking dance just because you have dark hair and braids Yeah, we just give it a few weeks It's been like a month already if not longer. Did you watch the show? What show Wednesday? Yeah, no, no, I don't watch any I mean let new kind of stuff I know I'm not gonna like Tim Burton. I know. I know

I don't like my type of thing either But yeah, but the new thing thing is young moms and their daughters doing choreographed dances with the year that they were born above them. It's like mom, 1985, and then the daughters, 2016 or something, and they're doing this choreographed dance together. It sounds annoying.

You see it once or twice, you're like, oh, okay. You see it 100 fucking times. Where are you seeing it? Yeah,'re on Instagram. It's on Instagram. It's our Instagram then. I'm keeping track of what you're up to. He's a birthday week and and and and and and block everybody else. My algorithm is now become. It's always just looking today. It's all people playing guitars, dogs, cats, and monkeys, almost exclusively, and then everyone's in a way, and then the people I follow, like you, and you know, those

type of people. But otherwise, it's mostly animals and guitar players. Yeah. Do you watch Dave Hill do guitar solos with John Mayer? No. You know what Dave Hill is? No, he's fucking funny. Follow Dave Hill on Instagram. I guarantee you'll like him. Dave Hill, okay. He's a very funny guy and he does these guitar solos with John Mayer footage. It's really well done, yeah. I'll give it a try. All right.

Did you see Aunt Mancue? I did see Aunt Man. What'd you think? You were the one. Yeah, I was the one who saw it. Man, I sure wish that there was more ant man in that ant man movie. Sure a lot of other heroes running around and a lot of things happening and everyone's in a while. Every time Paul runs on the screen you're like why are

you taking Paul right off the screen. He's fucking awesome. He's so good. But like everybody everybody everybody's the hero now. It's like, now people are gonna call me an old Foggy, they're gonna call me, we're gonna call me a lot of names, gonna say I gotta stick in my butt. But I'm willing to risk it because I do think there's some sort of weird subversive thing going on in that movie.

What do you mean? That just made me go like this movie is supposed to be about heroes and heroes are supposed to do hard things because they're heroes. You know, they're supposed to inspire you to even if it's unrealistic and fucking hard, they're still supposed to do it because that's what makes them a hero. Okay. I felt it was really strange about how they wanted to make to hammer home that both Hank Pym and Janet got their freak on when they were in, when they were a part. Oh, yeah, you don't like that.

I don't like that. I don't I don't I think that's like what is that? How is that move the story along? How does that do anything but just make me go like, why do I need to know this? Why does the audience need to know this? Yeah, just for that joke of Bill Murray coming in as her ex, I guess. And but then Hank also has to say it too when he's like,

you know, I also had some things I had to take care of. But I didn't want his wife to think he's a fucking total fucking limp dick, man. He's got a like, what are you talking about? Would she's allowed to go fuck Bill Murray up and down the controversy, but he's at home. He's talking about, I don't know. Explain that shit to me because I'm going, would you want to hear, wouldn't you want to hear that your loved one was like,

I saved it for you, baby. Yeah, but she said it. She's the one who said it first. Right, but he could be like, you know what though? Why, she just cucked him out, man. Yeah, you're gonna be the bigger man. I would definitely be like, yeah, I'm gonna throw it in your fucking face.

It was like, hey, fucking bitch. I didn't get laid. How about that? I was a fucking monk. But he wasn't. I know, I don't understand about that? I was a I was a fucking monk. He wasn't. I know I don't understand why that needs to be in a superhero movie. If I agree, it has nothing. If I'm when I started being introduced to comic books as a young boy, if any of this kind of fucking nonsense was part of the storylines, yeah. I just don't think I could like fall in love with comics. Oh, I

Don't think if you and I started reading comics today you and I would fall 100% I don't think I could fall in love with the medium today. No, I I agree with you. I I I agree with you I thought the movie I mean there's still great stuff. Superman lost. Just came out. I heard it's good dude So fucking good and I actually meant to bring that up. That's Wade, right? No, there's still great stuff. Superman lost. Just came out. Yeah, I heard it's good. Dude, so fucking good. And I actually meant to bring that up. That's Wade, right? No, that's priest. So priest.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And it's fucking only first issue just came out. And it's a real weird sci-fi thing where Superman and Lois are chilling out. Again, the only relationship that I really ever care about that I'll read without being like a fucking real-mised Superman and lowest because I'm like they earned it So if they want to have a page of them kissing in the kitchen All right, tell me this so if Superman or lowest were separated for I'm about that's what I'm getting it

Oh, well, there was a story but this is an else world stories isn't canon okay But there is a canon story that happened where Superman and and Wonder Woman got sucked into another dimension where time moved differently and they were there for a thousand years and it was only five minutes here and when they came back they specifically addressed the fact that they did not I'm talking about yeah no you're right I'm talking about like like why do we got why do we have to know that she had needs how does that and what does that do for her character?

Nothing. Just for that joke of Bill Murray. That's literally the only reason they put the money. And you love Bill Murray too, right? Would you think of that Bill Murray? I mean, look, it's it didn't take his fucking. It didn't make use of Bill Murray, but it's good to see him on screen. Do you think, was there anything that you enjoyed about that movie? Um, well again, I thought I thought anything Ant-Man was good like Ant-Man stuff was good

Did you think of Mordok? Ridiculous. Yeah, but to me I tell you why I didn't bother me like I bother other people Mordok. I mean Mordok He's a fucking Jew like I don't know like, but he's supposed to be grotesque He's supposed to be like a little shot of his ass was pretty funny to be grotesque. He's supposed to be like a little shot of his ass was pretty funny when he put them in the thing. It's not the way I would have done Modoc, but to me Modoc is just such a fucking... But you could have did something really cool. What more could you have done? Well, you could have designed something CGI, something up that looked really disturbing and weird, rather than something that looked like Shark Girl and Lava Boy. I didn't see that. Well, I mean,

it looks like something in a Nickelodeon in that, dude., I again, it's not the Modok I would have done, but I feel like I don't know what you can know. There's other weird messages in the movie though. Like, so Modok and him when he was in his human form back in Ant-Man one tries to murder the daughter, right? Yes. So she's able to turn him by just by going like, don't be a dick. Yeah. Stop being a dick. You could choose not to be a dick,

and you don't have to be a dick anymore. I'm not a dick. I was just like, I wanted to hurt the screen. I wanted to. I really, yeah. You took it way more seriously than I did. I just feel like an age. Well, do you get king? Um, wasn't nothing. I really yeah, I'm way more seriously than I did. I just feel like and what did it came?

Wasn't nothing felt nothing I didn't move my needle at all. I feel like when you have a movie or you can go into the microverse and You just choose to create all new characters right? You've you spit in my face. Okay. You spit in the fuck all of comicdom's face by not including any some B.C. list characters from the microverse. Okay.

You created all new characters because you think you know everything's better. You got this, you don't need to fucking worry about Canon. You don't need to worry about the creators who created everything that you're fucking building off of and you don't give us one neat character something. But hasn't that been marvel for the past five years? Yeah, but I have had enough.

I'm ready. I'm ready to go out and do protests. Side of the road at theaters and just be like, don't go see us moving. And it's that they need to. Nobody would go see it. Yeah, it's not a theater. So it's not going to. I'm not going to rally anybody.

You wasted your time. Yeah. Yeah, it's out of theaters already. So it's not gonna be, I'm not gonna rally anybody. You can be wasting your time, yeah. Yeah. It's over, right? It's over. MCU's done. Well, it's not done because they're so much money. They're gonna keep making more, but they've lost their way

and they cannot find a way back. Well, they're my opinion. Well, they're talking, it's, you don't even know what's going on anymore, like, just, Marvel made a mistake, man. They should have just recast instead of killing off Just re-care because people want to see Iron Man people want to see Captain America like I don't want to say I'm sorry. They will never make me want to see a fucking Miss Marvel movie. I just won't I don't care

That's his amulet tank too that now You're just saying what everybody's saying but but right you're right. You're just saying what everybody's saying, but but right you're right. You're just saying what everybody's saying But yet they get attacked for saying it They I don't want to see miss Marv. Oh you fucking male pay show in his pig Eight-year-old character I don't give a shit. I want to say character. No, you're right But you're just you're just saying what everyone's thinking and posting on line But other people I think the response to it, which people have said to me, is like, yeah,

but like, there is an audience for those characters. There's people that love fucking Miss Marvel, lover. I don't think there is. I think the show tank too. I know there are people that like that character, but that's the thing, like the TV show, I don't mind them making a Miss Marvel TV show. What the fuck do I care? It's not TV show like I don't mind the making a Miss Marvel TV show what the fuck do I care it's not for me I won't watch it right but like I

Want to see a movie then I get about Iron Man Like I suppose he fucking the night you know Yeah, like where's the fantastic four how the fuck we on our second Miss Marvel movie? Yeah, whatever and we have an fantastic for you like X-Men have been fucking owned by Disney for years now. Like how are we not, what are you guys doing? Problems some cue, it's X-Men. Yeah, it's X-Men, right? No, no, no, no, we can't have X-Men.

Wow, I think we definitely went through a period like that, but I think that we're... Is that in a show? Brian a show. that we're is that in a show Brian a show Brian a show a little visit from Brian a shell and his lovely wife always look so good from tails from behind the fake counter Yes, maybe the most popular patreon show The regular show. Yeah, but the i by comics that shattered all All records on the patron yeah, but like it it got us like hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of new subscribers once the word broke that you know something big was revealed. I feel like we should like.

Of course I kill them, but maybe like graze. Q's ass with a bullet and then be like who shot Q. Like that's our next big reveal. Well, I mean, there's a few things we could do that kind of concept show again. I have one thing I still can reveal and we always got the skull that we can always pull the curtain back on. Yeah. You just did. Skandex should have away from the ring.

Bleed that. I gave that. I have, I personally have a horrific revelation that only one person on Earth knows. Who's the person? Mary Beth. Oh. I've only told her. And it's shameful.

I wouldn't think it, I mean, if it only one other person knows then yeah those are the ones you do keep Close to the vest. Yeah, it's bad And it's what's it who's it was affected by it? Who's affected by it? Yeah, my mother No, it's pretty bad. Whoa, I'm gonna save that If you're on Patreon the next I buy comics would wow Yeah, like well so bad that we don't even know know it you would even I couldn't bring myself to tell you guys that's insane the things I know about you I know did you do it when you were a child? uh no this this would have been

seven eight years ago something like that. Okay. Yeah. My mind went to like some real weird shit like you know, spine on your mom or No, you see my mom right? We do And he's like, what are you doing? Oh, ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho Alright. We got some spots this week, boys. We got some spots. Yeah. We got an aunt. Well, I don't know if he's an aunt. He's a friend of the family.

Yeah, he's part of the family. Yeah, he's an aunt. But this is about manscaped. Spring has sprung on our friends at manscaped, our back. And they have the best tools for some spring cleaning. They've already helped you tidy up all the nooks and crannies of your body's basement, but this year they can help you perfect the presentation on that beautiful face with a new

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Yeah, you're asked cheeks. I've met your face cheeks. We're looking for. I wasn't paying attention. I heard the word cheeks. I didn met your face cheeks. We're looking good. Oh, I wasn't paying attention. I heard the word cheeks. I mean, I didn't even consider. It goes right. Fatical cheeks.

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We got a... I'm a Brian Maxx from our buddy Brian Max. Yes. He's Is this retinal? I'm gonna say I'm gonna pronounce it retinal retinal wrestling a pro wrestling show debuting the hardcore rules Circle pit scramble match punk rock snake charge and hell turn What what is this he's He's promoting wrestling shows. Yeah, it's wrestling shows. He's a promoter now.

We're trying to get the word out for people to go out and see his wrestling shows. So he's, he's Vince McMahon? Yeah. Sounds like it. Yeah. All right, cool. What's it called? It's called retinal wrestling.

Retinal wrestling. Yep. It's a pro wrestling show debuting the hardcore rules, Circle Pits, Gramble Match, Punk Rock, Snake Church, and Hell Turn. We'll be playing to close the night. The date is April 60, the 2 o'clock PM, and the location is LCY Media, and Birmingham, Alabama. Tickets are on sale now at retinal wrestling dot com r.e.t.i.n.a.l

W R E S T L I N G dot com. There's only a hundred ticks available Oh, man, and the next there's next show is gonna be huge outdoor pro wrestling punk rock block party in Nashville Tennessee on May 7th sponsored by no quarter Nashville. Wow Nashville's fucking great city Nashville Nashville's Hoppin, man. Love Nashville. I have, oh no, what happened? Nashville's one of my favorite cities. If you haven't been, you should go.

Let's take this opportunity. When Mrs. N'Shell was here, she gave everybody a hug. Yeah, right. I just can't, I just so, why can't I give a social hug? It feels like, you know, she probably got more hug in that tripod that was next to me because it feels like she's squeezing her nuts.

I don't know, I can't just do the social hug without feeling like self-conscious that it's robotic. I don't know, I love the social hug. I like it too, yeah, I'm a big hug. I enjoy it. I like it. Yeah, I don't know, it's just, hug guys. I like it too, yeah, I'm a big hunter. I enjoy it. I like it. Yeah, I don't know, it's just, I've never been able to do the social hug.

I don't know if I ever will be. I don't think there's anyone with that bud. No, I won't give her a fist bump, but it was awkward. Yeah, she's coming in, it looks like you're gonna something else. Anything? No, you're gonna wrap it up? No, not yet, because I have, I brought for us, and I'm hoping it works. I was home, we're gonna go to fantasies,

to get a birthday beer after this, you're saying that's not happening, huh? I didn't see that. What if I promise you you a home by five? I think by five would be a chapter. It's an hour 12 minutes away. I happened to have from a couple of weeks ago, Ming Chen's first attempt at stand-up comedy, and I thought we might review it.

Oh, I see how he did. Yeah, get him, showed me. Yeah, so you've seen it before. I've seen it, yeah. I have not seen it. Oh, yeah, right. I purposely did not watch it because I wanted to watch it for the first time. All right, I haven't seen it. I have not seen it. Oh, yeah, I purposely did not watch it because I wanted to All right, I haven't seen it. It's his first attempt. It's his first is gonna be bad

Probably it's gonna be a second attempt because he did a he did stand up at the The comic book. Well, I'm saying like I think anybody like I said we're talking about Sal before how he He was rougher when he started out now Now he's just a pro. Right. You know, this is a man's first attempt. As far as you put this online. Yeah, me too. My first attempt was down in Key West when I proposed to Mary Beth. And I feel she said I did great.

I felt I blew it. My cards were mixed up. So I had to sort of tap for a little while. So it is. It's difficult. There's not the easiest thing in the world Yeah, but we're gonna still listen to and potentially ridicule Ming Chen Just tell me when you want me to stop it. Okay, so everybody give it up for Ming Chen Okay, he comes out to the stage

Oh Sweet, what's up everybody? My name is Ming Chen. My friend's called me Ming the Merciless, you know, like Flash Gordon, when I play favorite movies. And I, please, this is truly my first time I've ever done this. I think you guys make it look so easy.

And I can't do that, but I'm an Albuquerque. It doesn't matter. Please be gentle. And it is my first time in a Sarah. That's your name. I get five minutes. Oh, man. I'm not going to let five minutes. He's already blown through a minute, saying thank you. Yeah. Talk about how sweet it is. It's his first time. Yeah. It's like however, first podcast episode is talking about what the name of the podcast is. podcast is waste time. Yeah. He's going a little bit of time so he can do his five minutes. Yeah, he's, I wonder, I'm not

seeing, I'm interested in what his approach as a comedian is. Is he Ming the cynical? Is he Ming the, like, is he doing observations? I'm far he's Ming the liar because nobody calls him Ming the merciless. Yeah, yeah. That, thatess That that that Joe didn't go over so well. No people didn't care for it. All right I figured I would just jump up take a chance like you know and if I sucked I'm from New Jersey. I don't live here and if I suck it. I just go home You guys have never seen me again or I get killed by a meth head and you never see me again. All right. I really sucked. You know, I believe you guys. So, already he's insulting them by saying, yeah, I know.

Methads all over the place. Oh, okay. I thought he was like, we'll go home and get killed by a meth head in Jersey. No, he's, he's, he'll make it back to Jersey if he doesn't get killed by a meth head. Oh, I believe I think it's a new, new Mexico. Okay. All right. Sorry. Yeah. if he doesn't get killed by a method, but I believe I think it's a new Mexico. Okay, all right, sorry. Yeah. Like, man, that duty played short round in Temple of Doom. He came into Stano County, he sucked.

Like, oh, look, I was awful. So, short round might win in my ear or something. Holly, one of my best friends in the entire world, she's rocking back and forth, he's nervous. The end of that has to be like the punch line short round. You don't lead with short round and then Peter off after that. Not to mention, it doesn't hate the guy. All he did was like, I think he wanted to ask her.

Who the fuck hate short round? Nobody. He's like one of the most beloved people on the planet, even before this reason run. I just can't even imagine like you throw out that first. I guess that's the first joke right technically that's the first joke. I think so yeah. And there wasn't there wasn't a reaction response. Yeah that that would make me be like all right thank you good night. Yeah really would I'd be like I'm done. If I don't get that re-initial reaction it's like you know it's just gonna be

initial reaction, it's like, you know, it's just gonna be, you know, it'll be nothing left. I would be totally thinking and totally like in my head. Try it like when we were creating this show. Like I would be like, I would be trying material that's like just flopping. And you know, I'm up there with Sal and Murray and they're really funny. So like, it would be like, Sal would be killing and and I'd be working out a joke, and it just flops. It would be like, it's terrible after, then it'd be my turn to talk, and it would just crickets. So it's like, I know what he's going through, but it's not, you know, you got to do it. You got to do it.

There is something to get a power through it. You have no choice. I can't walk off. I've seen professional comedians restart their bits like three times after fucking up Yeah, like what I want to see already lying like the crowd was fucking merciless to this woman They were just like already already and she had to start the same bit three so she wasn't funny Which was a problem? But they don't give a fuck they just want to see already. They just want to see already

Yeah, I I did a stand-up thing with jiggie one time. And there is something to people not liking you because this was certainly not my crowd. This was like a bunch of like early 20 somethings, mid 20 somethings more of a woke crowd. So when I started bringing up Harvey Weinstein and shit. They didn't bite. They weren't crazy about it. They said you were in it.

Yeah, there's something to be like, okay, none of them like me. Fuck it. They're something to be like okay none of them like me fuck it I'm gonna go ahead anyway. He cares what they think. Yeah yeah I've been on downward spirals and committed to him. Yeah you got to do that. However the first time we ever met he tried to kick me out of the Albuquerque press club not really welcoming the newcomers over there and and her especially I refer to her as a this early bartender However, she warmed up to me. I told her I was the the the I guess the comedy booker for the old-new star search and She warmed up to me Hold on a second. I don't know who he's talking about

This actually what I want to talk about actually introduced him I think it has nothing to do with Ming, because you guys have the TV on. And the spice girls video was on. We might not have to get him in on this, but you wear this conversation on my birthday party. Apparently, somebody asked Getham who his perfect woman, his type is. Oh, yeah, yeah. And he said sporty spice. Sporty spice.

I was shocked. I've never heard anybody say that. I'm kind of curious. Hey, get him. I know we're doing Ming, but like that's all right. It's not much meat on the spoon. I gotta be Get him! What's up with Sporty Spice? Yeah, come here a second. This is just making the rounds at the bird They're part of the other night that you want to fuck Sporty Spice. Which one is Sporty? She's the at the birthday party the other night that you want to fuck sporties by which one is sporty she's the

she's the one that yeah that one the one that you just assumed didn't like guys oh I why would I get that I just the first time I've ever seen a video of them yeah, I mean they're fucking this is like you know I'm more of a scary guy myself. Yeah, which one's that that's the black one. I mean, she looks fucking phenomenal. She's hot. Why, I just, I've never, not that, like, I don't look at her and been like, she's gross. I'm just never heard anybody, not even say, who's your favorite spice girl? I mean, I'll see, looks amazing. Who's your favorite spice girl? You used her as an example of your dream woman.

And I've never heard you say that before. Yeah, I was shocked when I heard him say that. I think I think I said I had the song just played, I think. Yeah. So it was like, was that the top of my head? So still. Still, though. And it's very recognizable.

You know, it was, you know, context wise. How old you have been when this video came out, when these girls hit big, would you have been in your late teens early teens? Definitely been over 18. So I'm a little over 18. Yeah. This is the 90s so yeah.

I'm kind of annoyed because I thought I thought for sure that you're perfect. You're going to say one of the girls from Obama. I thought I thought you and Mary Talon more was the perfect moment. Sadly the Mary Talon more theme song was not playing yet. I did a spit take when he didn't say dars day. I wasn't there. You would have known better if you would come. Nobody else would have known who I was talking about, but what would have. And I would have got a knob like Grizzly Adams. Yeah, it spread throughout the party. Richard's like, you know what I can't be Irish.

Richard Kind was the one who told it. He was like, what's this I heard? About Get on Liking, Sporty Spice. Oh, I was so angry that he left before you, I was able to get a picture with him. Well, there were signs all over the party wall. No photos, no videos, no social media So why are you asking me for a photo with the guy?

No, no, what I told Brian what I was gonna do is try to lure him into a back room where the photos work Oh, there was a photo friendly room, but I said but that seems strange if I was like, hey, would you go into this back room? I Would have done it. He would have loved it. When I talked I introduced myself. I said hello and I said, you know, I really love your work But I think my favorite anecdote involving you and it was the who the fuck is I did he know he remembered it. Absolutely remembered it. Yeah Fam fam for me. Yeah, I told him that I liked him as a Saint Peter and the new history of the World Part II. So what, what, what is it about sporty that does it for you? Out of the five, she is the, you know, I like, I've always kind of been, I'm gonna say Tom Boish, you

know, attracted to like the Tom Boy, you know, you're like, it's kind of like being gay without being totally gay. No, no, no, no, it's... I don't know, it just... It just, you know, strikes a chord with me. I think maybe being raised on a farm, being around girls, the traditional dresses, and all that other stuff, like it's just... I mean, she's not hideous, no.

No, no, no, no. She's attractive, for sure. What happened to Kathy Ireland, no? I still... I'm still attracted to her, you know, but again, we were at it. We were why don't you attract it to anyone from the 21st century? You only like girls that are black and white. I mean, I used to have Kathy Island calendars. I knew someone who got me the St. Paddy's day stand up. Oh, remember those? That green dress? Yes. Yes. He used to get all the

swimsuit issues with her in it. I even had a signed photo from her I'm not sure where that ever ended up. Yeah, talking to the mic a little bit more. I can't hear you as well. Yeah, wow So how did the who asked you about like how did it come out that? At how did you get out the information? I might birthday party that's but was the song came on and somebody was like I think it was cousin Helen cousin Helen. Yeah Yeah, she was Fascinated with it. She is she was like, I think it was cousin Howin. Cousin Howin. Yeah. Yeah, she was so, she looked like, she is fascinated with, she is.

She was like, when, when Getham left to go get some drinks or something, she was telling, she was like, what is his story? He's like, he's a good looking guy. Like, what's, yeah. Why is he any of a girlfriend? I'm like, there's something. I spent two more minutes talking to him.

Yeah, there's a whole stuff other things going on. Yeah. You're experiencing the microcosm of get them in a almost buzz state. Yeah, you addressed up. You get a shirt. He was dancing. He was he fucking gimp's around here, dude. If you saw him cut in the rug, he was dancing all over the place. He was dancing with Ming and Mary Beth. He paid for it right this week, right? I'm it. Oh, did you? Popping all day. There was a lot of ibuprofen on the way home tonight.

Oh, that was fun though. All right, so just to this day though, art. So it doesn't come up. It only came up because of a song. Yeah, because I was like trying to think of something that that was right. It's like, again, it ran at the forefront on my mind. And I figured the audience that I was talking to you would know

reference sure for sure You know, hey Melissa Joan Hart, you know, Britney Spears, you know, you know, but that was what's playing No, I'm not talking with them. Is that the girlfriend? It was a Sabrina. Oh, yes Sabrina. Yeah That's it. Oh my ex. Yeah, yeah, it was it was no my my ex kind of looked like her a little cell, you know It was you know, it ex kind of looked like her. A little so, you know, it was, you know, it was kind of cool. Kind of looked like her. Kind of, you know, nothing like her. The whole of the painting version of her. She did.

We know what that was. That was fucking face. She did. When we were going out, she kind of looked like. Three tits. When we were going out, she kind of looked full of such a Joan Hart, like, you know, in her. Yeah, she was my lead this figure. Oh, yes, it's been a teenage wish.

It's like a three. It's all. Yeah, those are the shows I grew up with. And who's your, who's your contemporary girl? The girl that in today's speak Wednesday, Adams would be, would be Brian Johnson. I've never watched that show. I don't, I don't know. Yeah, I never watch that show. I don't I don't know Yeah, it's tough to pick

Really yeah, even when you know what Anna darmas right there you still can't you're still it's still hard Because like I don't really watch a lot of Contemporary stuff that I could You're not allowed You didn't see the new blade runner. No, no, no, it did not. Oh boy, alright. We're watching Partridge Triliest, right? So we know the Partridge mom is hot as hell. I don't know.

Yes, I'm really Jones. I should've just wore the high ass. Yes. We got that episode of that. Remember when you were singing whale song? Oh. Who's a, who played Yolano? Oh Who played Yolana every channel's block Dixie me TV

Who's Yolana? Yeah, Yolana. Oh Yolana and the black widow movie. Oh Florence poo poo. Yeah, oh the Russian girl. Yeah, all right. Yeah, she's she's Stractive on it. Yeah, but she's got to be considered contemporary. Oh, yeah, I think she's like like cutting edge right now Right and senior kick ass and everything else like that. Yeah, okay. All right, very good All right, thanks. Did you hear me? stand up Yes, which reviews We're in the middle of it right now. So I don't give it no spoilers. Yeah, for a first time, which he claimed, you know, forgetting that he did it for CBM.

It was, it was pretty good. Oh, you guys all got that fucking line right away. Oh, huh? I can't let that go. Well, that's his like condition. Yeah. Like, you know, that like he sees that mistake and that just like bugs him like he can't let it go.

Oh, I tweeted him. Yeah. Yeah. That's like bothers him on a level that you don't understand. Really? Yeah, that's the kind of thing like the OCD kind of thing. That's what Cousin Helen didn't see. Yeah, and like he tells everybody that mentions it. He's like, that's not the first time.

Like it's this weird thing. Yeah. This stumbling block that's in front of him that can't be removed. Yeah, or ignoring. Being admit that that wasn't his first time until he gets it. Didn't mean say anything to your tweet. No, but I he did say something to me at your party because I brought it up. God make sure he remembered that it wasn't the first time. I mean I would give it to me that technically I mean the way we shot that it was his first time it stand up. He didn't have to stand there for five minutes straight with,

it were two minutes and nine seconds in of yet to hear a joke. But he's being held to a standard by a lunatic though. Yeah. Yeah. Like, it's not about the quality of the jokes. It's not about the delivery. It's like that one little thing is now can't be removed. I think like you can't even listen to the rest of the stand up

because he made that mistake. I would have liked him seeing the pull out the web shooters. I'd be a little proud comedy all on Carrot Top, you know, across the genres. Well, I don't know that he doesn't do that because we have, we're gonna listen to a little more. Thank you, thank you, thank you. We learned nothing.

Well then my expectations were met. Yeah A little bit more of a ming now. I'm sorry. I just I saw the spice girls. Yeah Understandable Yeah, I was like Ed McMahon Ed McMahon joke works here. Yeah works in this room, right? Yeah, you win. Stop it. Um, Edmick Manjoke. It works here. Yeah, works in this room. Right.

Does it work in a room at a comedy club anymore with people in their 20s? I think we heard by the response. I wouldn't make that. I wouldn't fight for that reference. Probably let that one go. All right. I'm we're fucking Kids I get all excited about that we have Alphan in practical joke is this season and

Kids are like who? You guys don't know who Alphan is and they're like Alph, what the fuck you talking about? Alien life for me. Yeah, Gordon show away, but people but people of 30 like holy fuck you got out Yeah, I beg man reference. I don't know he might want to just strike that from the act, but he's refining it Yeah, yeah From New Jersey I'm from out of town and this town's rough man this town is rough First time I ever visited Albuquerque It's kind of rolled up to me Hey man, what cheerly do you prefer?

I don't know, Hormel with beans Yeah, kind of look like he wanted to shoot me That's a lot of guns in this town So Oh my god, it's so bad Oh, this port bad Oh yeah, this is a rough to listen

This is like, this is like Michael Scott level of shit right here. Yeah, well This is first time man, right. I get it. It might get better. We're only it takes balls We're only three minutes and it takes balls to go up there with this material for sure It takes balls. He's got him. He's not to be discouraged. I he shouldn't be discouraged by this He's no, this is a learning experience stepping along step in a long journey. Right, every time you do something, we'll be there, mate. That's your lesson. It's how resilient is Ming-Chen.

Oh, fucking 100%. Right, when you put yourself up against the Ming-Chen in terms of resiliency factor, it's like he's a 10 and I'm like a two. You know, if it doesn't go my way, 100%, I'm like, I'm not interested anymore. I don't care about it. I convinced myself I never cared about it. You're like, I'm from out of town. Nobody claps for like, fuck it on out.

Alright, mate. Beth is duties. Like, yeah, I'm used to be a bounce over at knockouts. You guys know knockouts down the street in the strip club, and I was like, holy crap, you almost took a bullet there, like, could you imagine dying at knockouts? Could you imagine like, somebody shooting you at knockouts? Like, that's the way you go out, and I'm like, oh man, you almost took a bullet there? He's like, yeah man, the stripers are so bad I want to shoot myself. That's the second joke right?

Yeah, well, that's the second joke I did here at Grown. Yeah, why they Grown? Because it was against women. Yeah, I think so. Yeah, because the strippers are so nasty. We cut out a stripper joke out of the show. Oh, yeah. Really?

Yeah, somebody day shift stripper was not getting a good reaction. I was like, who knew who that was? And another joke. It was a joke where I? Who's that? And then another joke. It was a joke where I said to Murray, I go, yeah, do this, Bros. Before Hose. And then I'd be like, and you're the hoe. And like, before I said, you're the hoe, you lose the crowd.

Just saying Bros. Before Hose. It's, why? What world are we in that? I don't get it. I mean, it's a comedy show like we're up there Fucking around yeah, and I was and I said bros for it's a creed. It's true. I know I know that it's true This is before mist is I Yeah, like so we said that that's fine. You said that that's fine

But it we actually it lost the audience and so we cut that that's fine. You said that that's fine, but we actually lost the audience. And so we cut that, both my jokes. So we cut them so I was like, yeah, the only sister you got a sensitive, but you know, these ways around, it's all your approach. It's all your approach. And he didn't make the right approach and I didn't make the right approach. All right.

Making fun of daytime strippers, this guy. Can't do it. Don't call it there again dude. TDs are fancy worlds for life man. Am I right? You got five kids? You like strippers right? It's rough man. Am I correct? You guys really have a

place here called the warzone? Is that really true? I got here and it's like oh man the warzone you don't want to go there man. It's rough. Where I come from in New Jersey they're like oh man you don't want to go there man. It's rough like where I come from in New Jersey They're like oh man. You don't want to go past those train tracks like that. That's where the Mexicans hang on man. You don't want to go there so the Mexican You know he's never been told that in his life Never never well. Is there a punchline that justifies that?

I'd be taking the person to test I wasn't I wasn't aware of this anti-Mexican But like last night I went to the war zone and I went to go see the Mexicans. I went to play school Servantes I went to go see the Mexicans man That food is awesome, and I was on for life man. Thank you So great man so great That food is awesome, man. I've wore someone for life, man. Thank you. It's so great, man. It's so great. So, I'm actually, I'm in town.

This is more a list of the things he's done since he's been there and have been there. He's really... How much prep did he do, you think? I mean, he must have written it on a bar napkin right before he went up. It's very... I have to tell him, what is he talking about? Who is he talking about? I think he's rushing it because he's a little bit like nervous. He wants to try to remember everything. It's not easy. He definitely wrote it before he just went up there because it's all

local references. Right. He must have written it when he was there. Yeah. Yeah. Is that a strategy to win over the crowd? Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, my God. It's the cheapest pop in the world but they love it. Really? It works. Just like that. You know when. It's the cheapest pop in the world, but they love it really works just like You know when they're like hello New Jersey people. Oh my god. I can't believe he said New Jersey Yeah, I've never fallen for that though. I to me. I always saw through that I'm in the concert with wealthy crosses his arm and frown Yeah, you know, we're not gonna get me with that easy shit. Yeah, we got to work a little bit harder for my clapping Yeah, yeah

Give it away because you you happen to know what fucking town You're in I strong comedy shows it flies a nice cheap up. Yeah All right, let's see how to say about Mexicans. I'm shooting a movie What was the joke I don't know the joke was that You like it Mexican for it's a very dangerous area to go and and he went there to look at Mexicans Because he assumes that they're gonna be the dangerous ones and then they just made them good food Then and then he went to a Mexican restaurant and he loved it. So war's on forever All right, all right, okay

You guys fear diversity here in Albuquerque Asian porn is really huge in this town Who knew who knew that anybody out there who loves you know short-dick Asian people Yeah, man like that is a big market here. I had no idea. I know it. Thank you very diversity It's getting better for the Asians in film. We gotta start somewhere man, right? Right like how I mentioned I'm on a TV show go comic book then Used to air on him. See I'm just walking dead Flood No, I'm not recognition. Yeah, I'm really what's that?

He's he had an angle the Asian angle you had it. I mean if right now He has a unique pass to talk about Asians in a comedic way that could be his market right now. Yeah He could say anything you want. Yeah, I don't know if I'd lead with the short dick stuff But like you could do the me Chinese joke if you felt oh god People would die for that classic and he's the one that can do it But he won't he won he's too busy talking about Asian porn and war zones. I said you guys got you guys got a shit You can't have the music the music video from the 90s are playing no, I'll shut it off now Now this girl's girls girl. No, this is a this is a lecious of the stone

But these two these two fine-looking Straubits running around Very distracting in the background really is Yeah, I got my back to it so I don't have to look at those two. Yeah, I'm looking all good I listen to more Ming Chen. All right, sorry. I got seven seasons 96 episodes 96 fun-filled episodes Unfortunately, we got canceled a few years ago and I'm doing comedy underneath the liquor store in Albuquerque.

Yeah, so I know you guys are in comedy, you guys are in a bit. Okay, that could have been a good joke. Little self-deprecating humor. The delivery was a problem there. Yes, but that was a solid hit. That's a solid hit if he delivers that, right? That's pretty common for people to be like, I can't believe I'm in blah, blah, blah,

because I used to do blah, blah, blah. Yeah. But it's good though. It's a good, it's a good, like, it's a slam on the place. It's a slam on him. I like that. I like that. Right.

I used to be somebody almost. We are like, you know, a big comedian. Say, say, say your money, guys. Say your money, I wish I did it. Yeah, I spent that shit like water, man. Um, if you, uh, I have my name as my son. He's saying he spent his compilkman money like water? I guess so.

I wonder if that's true. I know I did, but it wasn't like water. It was like drugs. Right, but I wonder if you see any of it I don't know why would you say that? Damn, well, what are these spenders? I was trying to embark on a comedy career. Yeah, I know what could you possibly spend a lot of travels a lot Yeah, but doesn't get paid like it does but like I mean what was he spending once he's there? I? Don't know I don't know enough about me. Yeah

I sunk mine all away man. I know you're I paid for a dog mother fucker. I brought a dog I brought a couple jerseys, you know, knew nothing not like sign jerseys right the rest went in the bank So wise man right there. Yeah. I could be a financial consultant. Mine went into my goal. Where are you when I needed you to consult me? I was fucking on your balls. I was like, why are you buying all these fucking pens? Oh, that's true.

That's true. All these high-end $100 pens is like, what the fuck are you doing? Oh, it's never gonna rain again. Get yourself a pen. I was like, how much is this pen? You don't want to know. That was just like what you got a problem I got real into felten pens for sure They're at home somewhere in a box. How many did you buy?

Probably like I don't know maybe four five. Oh, it's not too crazy. They were pens It does the same thing that a fucking 50 cent BIC would do. Yeah, no, there's a different feeling to it to like a high end pen for sure. I don't know you need four of them, but I told you you're gonna say you had like 10 or 15. Oh, okay, you're talking to look, you're talking to a person that has had pencils and pens in between his felt fingers. Yeah, I know that that there is the difference between a nice pencil and a nice marker, but not fucking what he was spent. What's he doing? What's he writing? And he needs to fucking

write it. You can't even read my head. I don't know why I was super into pens. Well, he was writing it down so he wanted for lunch for the fucking PAs to bring him. fucking P.A. used to bring him. Oh, he's fucking $150 pen. I still can't read it. Just texted to me. Could you made that pen? Did you get your money back? I might be able to.

Yeah, I have like one that's retractable. That one was like $150. There was another one that was a little bit over a hundred. That's like a real cool like metal. It's such a strange thing thing they like fucking splurge I was into my right mind back there I could point it anything I did back then that's not the right decision

I was given a pen for closing some deal and it was like a thousand dollar pen and I never use it because I'm like I'm not terrified of it. Yeah, I'm like, what am I gonna do with this fucking thing? You're just giving it to you as a gift. Yeah, we close some contracts of the people that we close it with bonus gifts and it was like a thousand dollar pen. Like what goes into making a thousand dollar pen? Like what's it made out of like fucking solid gold?

There is a gold element to it. No silver, it's not even gold. Yeah, There is a gold element to it. Yeah, no silver. It's not even gold Yeah, there's a silver element to it. It's a fountain pen I have for I don't remember who makes it because it's too nervous to fucking use it. Yeah, yeah, where's that right now? You know if I was on iJ I would have been buying thousand dollar pens. Oh, yeah It's in storage now But I know where it is in storage like not on that not on the premises or even live no Oh, wow

I have like a career storage thing that has all like props and and like banners from Madison Square Garden stuff like that Like as these things come in costs kind of like a like a trophy a Yeah, unit. Yeah, like Batman's cave. Yeah, except it's all in a box and it's all boxed up. I have a I have an underground Like underneath my house. It's full of all TSD shit. Yeah, just everywhere Okay, my wife is just like you got to get a storage unit. I'm like I'm not getting a storage unit I said she goes why don't you guys got a storage unit instead of put all this shit in your house? Because I don't feel like driving to it in the middle of the night when I need one fucking thing.

I'm not driving all the way to Pazlet to fucking go into the storage unit to get one thing. That's why, yeah, it's just too easy, but there's a lot of shit under my house. All right, we only got a little bit more. All right, yeah, so far away. Power through this. I'm waiting for a joke.

Full blood in Chinese, full blood in Chinese, moment dead, a little bit more. Alright, yeah. So far, I'm waiting for a joke. Power through this. I'm waiting for a joke. Full blooded Chinese, full blooded Chinese, mom and dad, full blooded Chinese. I love disappointing white people. I love it. The best way to disappoint white people is to be, they're all men, wearing from Hong Kong, Taiwan. I know Cleveland, the point Cleveland, Ohio. They're there.

That guy for best response. Yeah. So it's, yeah, it's all. Why do you think you're not just saying you're the short Kings at Jake? Why? Because he's originally from, right? He's from Cleveland. I thought he was from Michigan originally.

I think Cleveland originally, then Michigan, and then Jersey. OK. So the white people are disappointed. Do a lot of white people say to him, where you from Hong Kong, do you think? I doubt it. About as many people as to him, where you from Hong Kong, do you think? I doubt it. About as many people as tell them not to cross the tracks at the Mexican town. He did way better than I could do, though.

I mean, he did like, like, that was like Steve Martin, Eddie Murphy, Andrew Dice Clay, who are some of the other big names of George Carlin, like, and Ming Chen. And then if I, yeah, like, the he looked like those level of comedians compared to what if I went up there. I don't know, man.

I've seen you like, you're pretty good. I don't write jokes. I don't do jokes. Yeah, it's true. Yeah, I've never fucking written a joke, I don't think. They're too hard. Yeah, you get somebody to write your material for you. Lots of comedians do that.

Yeah. Not Ming. Jake, you get somebody write your material for you lots of comedians do that. Yeah, not me Hey back there. I keep doing this women like oh, man. I don't I don't date short I don't date short guys. I want to write you. I don't date short guys I'm like bitch when we're lying down horizontal we're the same size and we're the same height Body are you out there? We're the same size That's Andrew dice level of like Don't I'm getting the vibe of Andrew dice. Oh Yeah, go bitch He sounds bitter like the bagel shrimp like bitter like He sounds bitter like the bagel shrimp like doing like size jokes and stuff

He's like I'm tired of being called short like and he has a wife. He has a wife Bitch laying down we're all the same height That's not true. It's totally not true. Yeah, it's not even accurate joke. No. He's not being true to himself. That's why this isn't going on. That's why yeah, he's not being honest. Right. Finally, I'm at the hotel's ass later. Thanks. Yeah. Thank you very much. That's all I got for you. Hopefully it's okay Not one tell him Steve Dave showed up Him and John mayor both I know I don't know what's going on with these people. Yeah, he should stick with it Hey, that wasn't a total disaster I agree that yeah, I see people get up there freeze right not be able to say anything. Yeah, he's just got a honate

Yeah, he's he's got a honate. He's got it. Well, he's got a couple some jokes He's he a hole in it. He's got it. Well, he's got to come up with some jokes. He's he needs a more solid Could he do jokes and he needs to slow down. Could he do the The Mike and Ming joke aspect could he introduce that level of like jokes where like but like Mike and Ming jokes The ones that you Through like fast and furious at him could he kind of turn it around and tell those jokes about him and Mike I think people who's Mike we don't even know who you are Interesting though, you know a lot of people see my friend Micra gay to get

So now probably wouldn't be able to but angle he could work I feel like it wouldn't fly the only reason reason my gay jokes worked was because you were there. Otherwise. I think I would have been very lost on comic bookmen. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha friends doing so much weird shit. We just constantly have things to talk about. Yeah, it is strange. You look around at these maniacs that we're going through life with, like they're all fucking nuts. And things like, I know it. I'll do you all get up there with no material. I'll reference that on from Jersey.

And you guys are from Elba Kirkki. And then I'll tell a couple of, you know. He took a shot of white people. He tried to fucking make that work. That's easy. That's easy, man. You can't even make that work. Yeah, I thought really

Yeah, but he was the guy that made man, you know, I'm surprised he posted that I'm proud of him for doing it Yes, I'm glad he did it and I hope he continues to do it Yeah, I would love nothing more than to announce that Ming Chen is opening for the umbrella Could you swing that What did you swing it right now, but you'd bring him that time? Oh, he's got to give me material to go in with. I, I, he just uses the same elbow curking material in New Jersey, New York, Pennsylvania, whatever.

I usually let Sal handle that stuff, but like if I, if I was my show champion, him. Yeah, you should like not even joking around. Send this to Sal. Oh, that'd be so funny. I want him to open. I just feel like I think like Can you do that? He can go on and bring back the response to his response to yeah, oh, that would be so funny Like if you play straight like sell come on Well, cuz I'm so come on, but he won't but he won't be honest though

He might I don't know he won't be here. He won't know way No, but this is stand up, man. This is like these guys, they take the cheers. But if you present to him, like, hey, I want a higher man to come on the road with us to open up. I think he's really good. I know he's gonna stretch this out a little bit longer, but like, watch this.

He's really good. And just get, just, just wait. I want to see the text back. I can sound. Yeah. That's online. I'll send them a link. That's online, yeah. I'll send them a link. That's online, yeah.

I'll send you the link. I'll send Salon Link. All right, before we go, though, you know, still, let's remind the listeners. Yeah. You're plea to them. You're, you, you're March 31st at the Smod Theater, Smod Theater in Crankle Joker's movie,

doing a Q and A afterwards. Please do not bring this up. Please do not bring the reveal up. You know what not to bring it up. I mean, if you guys want to drop me a wink, when Kevin's not looking, that's fine. That's fine, but don't put me in that spot. Yeah, don't do that, that's all cute.

What has he ever done to you? He just keep just got you a sweet fucking tote bag. Come on, you guys got this tote bag. I never asked you for anything, you know? Yeah, I think you're gonna be fine. I think asked you for anything. You know? Yeah. I think you're gonna be fine. I think you're gonna, you're gonna have no sweat. No sweat.

No sweat. You don't have anything to worry about, man. It is not gonna be even nary a mention. If it comes up, just start busting into Ming's material. That's a rippable. Well, we have a couple of weeks before it goes. You know how I disappoint white people? Yeah.

I disappoint every nationality. Also before we go Walt, I gotta tell you about Raycon. Oh my gosh, you got an ad. I didn't forget we were so into it. You're gonna dig this ad at the last fucking two seconds of episode. I hear so many good things about Raycon. They should fucking dig it no matter where we put it. I've had many, many listeners tell me,

like, oh, I bought Raycon's and I love them, man, they're great. This time of year, everyone's talking about making big changes, which is all well and good, but most of the time, it's pretty unrealistic. All right, they're still talking about New Year's resolution, so we're not going to talk about that. The smallest changes in your team can make the biggest impact. Raycon is a premium audio at the perfect price point, so you can build great habits without breaking

the bank. Whether you're looking for a pair of everyday ear buds, low latency gaming headphones or a speaker with a battery that will last all night. Your next party, Raycon's got you covered. And yep, Raycon started half the price of other premium audio brands, so you don't even have to choose between products you can get one of each or a pair and a spare. And still pay less than you would with some of those other guys. Even if you know you love your Raycon's as much as I do, Raycon wants you to make sure you feel great about your purchase. They offer buy now, pay later options.

Every purchase has an easy and free return guarantee. They have three customizable sound profiles, earbud, tap functions, noise isolation, awareness mode, custom gel tips, crystal clear call quality, water and sweat resistant, and eight hours of play time for everyday earbuds or 11 hours for the speaker sweat resistance. I guess like when you're working out on your ear, your canals get all sweaty. Really? I don't think I've ever had my ears get sweaty. Any part of your body has ever sweat. Trips sweat? Oh all the time. Oh no. I don't think I've ever I can no matter how hard I've exerted myself my hair

doesn't get wet. Yeah. Other people I know, like, you know, even playing ping pong, Frank Fyre was soaking wet. He stuck up the whole, the whole office. Yeah, he did, yeah. Yeah. No, that's not true. We gotta, we gotta be. We gotta be.

We gotta be. We know Frank's gonna win. We gotta be. We gotta be. We gotta be. We gotta be. We gotta be. We gotta be.

We gotta be. We gotta be. We gotta be. We gotta be. We gotta be. fan. How long is that we see? We just signed a new one. Next October. I'm not moving all the shit out again. There's no higher people. Ready to buy something with a small with a big impact. What I do is like, Mary Beth has been snoring a lot lately. So I pop in my Raycons and sort of drown her out. It's usually the guy that snores, right? Or the dog. Yeah, or the dog. It's rough, though. I got my cat Weezen and one ear, her snoring and the other ear. He just popped the racons in.

That's what I know. Everybody's sleeping like a newborn baby, then as far as your concern. I don't care. Go to raycon.com slash TESD today to get 15% off your racons. Your racon order, that's byraycon.com slash TESD to score 15% off. That's by raycon.com slash TESD. All right, inside though, I think that that's a genius move on Raycon's part to offer the ability to buy one. But.

Oh, if you lose one, can you? Yeah, so you read, didn't you? Oh, thanks a lot. I think you go. I thought, I think I'm pretty sure you said that, didn't you? Did I say that? Yeah. Maybe. I don't know. Yeah, I thought that,'t you? I don't think so. I think you go. I thought, I thought, I thought, I'm sure you said that didn't you? Didn't I say that? Yeah. Maybe. I don't know.

Yeah, I thought that, well, if they are, and they should do that though. I know, because I got one crunch. Like, I, one of my original ones, I dropped it in the parking lot, and I wasn't aware, so when I came out of the grocery store, I like went to put them in back in my ear,

and I'm like, oh, I only got one. What the fuck? And I look on the ground, it's there on the ground, like, fucking smashed by a car. It's like, shhh, that sucks. So I got more racons. Man.

It's caught another pair. What can you do? Well, fuck, I'm bombarded. Yeah. There's a worse day in my life. So other than that, man. That's what we got. I gotta get going.

Yeah, I gotta, I gotta, I gotta girl with diarrhea. Gotta go take care of that. Well, I had fun, got a I got a girl with diarrhea. I got to go take care of that Well, I had fun guys Yeah, I'm around next week. I think I'm just around about basically unemployed now. I love it I love it when you come yeah, I love They'll take it the wrong way, but I love your unemployment because I'm like that means maybe he can do more Patreon stuff Which makes it so so fun, you know when you when you're involved? Yeah, for sure I mean that's it. I'm gonna blow up your phone then blow it up Look at me. I'm gonna fucking be working out and growing my hair. That's all I'm doing

There you go. I'm wearing it real the weekend Fuck a chill accent bro. What's it called chillaxing chillaxin? Is that a real thing? You made that up? No, I made that That's chilling and relaxing you put them together yet chillaxing Is that a real thing? You made that up? No, I made that up. That's chilling and relaxing. You put them together. You chill-axing. Did you got to do? Yeah, man. Except that you earned it. I think I earned it. This is a fucking rough lesson. It was a fucking gauntlet. Yeah, we got a little time. Now you chill-ax. Chill-ax. Like Netflix and chill, right? Yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah, fuck yeah. It sucked into shows. I have a Bible. Like fuck fucking why watch like six episodes before I even realize it's

Oh, it's great. It's wonderful Some is coming wall gonna have some barbecues. You gonna come by I will yeah, I want to do one in the in the parking lot here Oh, are we can we do that? Yeah, I thought we could do one behind it behind the building and you know the permit I'm it. Yeah, how it's that we got a like a permanent. I don't think so. I don't think anybody would see us back there. I don't think anybody would care. Let's do it. Yeah.

We do like a four color demons thing. Yeah. Oh, no, no, not with not with listeners. Oh, just us. Yeah, just us. Oh, it's about to give directions. I'm like, just pass the dumpster. So fair enough.

Well, can I wear my vest? Yeah, that's where you'd wear. All right, that's a win nothing but it. Flip Flops shorts and that's it. Got my vest and short shorts and my sneakers. Oh man. Yeah, flip flops. Yeah, flip flops will complete that. Yeah, I'll be the guy stankin' like that.

Stankin' like that. Stanky Anky over there looking happy and unemployed. Do it. Steve Dave. I love you all. Please, please, please, please. Please guys, I'm begging you. All of you, I know you want to do it. I get it. I fucking get it. I love you all. Please, please, please, please, please, please, please, I'm begging you.

All of you, I know you wanna do it. I get it. I fucking get it. I want you to do it, but we can't do it. We don't do it to me. Please don't do it. At what point? Did you fucking realize, like, I can't imagine it was right away.

It just comes to you like in the shower, like a couple days after a green, like, oh yeah, shit, you're gonna set something! He's gonna know! At what point, you're like, was it right away? It was right away, it was just double into it, and be like, oh no. I was thinking about answering questions for the movie

and I was like, oh wait a minute. I'm gonna be answering questions. Maybe some of the questions won't be about the movie. Yeah, I'll wait. I'm on, I'm on, I'm on, I'm on, I'm on, I'm on, I'm on, I'm on. It just runs out of the theater, like, perched through the emergency exit, the fire alarm goes off. My Ray Cons is parked at the whole hospital.

You'll be fine, you'll be fine. You know, when you put your trust in the ants, it's rewarded. It is. Okay. Well, you guaranteed. Yeah. All right, all right. Thank you. Thank you guys.