Tell Em Steve-Dave - #644: Funeral for a Friend

Episode Date: July 14, 2025

Bry, Walt & Q say goodbye to Tim the record store clerk.

Hello and welcome to this week's edition of Tell'em Steve Dave here with BQ. Hello. Here with Walt. Hello. And I know that at one point we said that every episode should be dedicated to Lindsay. Several times since then we've had other people that we had to shuffle in there, shoehorn in there. Yeah.

To have the episode dedicated to them. I think she wouldn't mind this week if we dedicated it to Tim. Yeah. I think she'd be okay with it. Yeah, probably. She doesn't have a choice, I guess, but yeah, I think she'd be okay with it. It's the way it is, Lindsay, sorry. Yeah, sorry about that, Lindsay.

Yeah, maybe next week. But yes, our dear friend Tim passed away from ALS just yesterday, if I'm not mistaken, which would be, I don't even know what day today is. Today's Wednesday, so it'd be Tuesday, Tuesday morning. Wow. After not a very long, but thankfully. Way sooner than I, I mean, yeah. Yeah. I was reading up on it and on ALS, Lou Gehrig's disease, and it said that usually the prognosis is like two to four years. Yeah. So he, yeah, he went downhill pretty quickly.

Got accelerated, man. Yeah, which sucks. Or it's better because you're not suffering the whole time and you're not like watching yourself degenerate. I guess I, I, I would have liked a longer runway of like, I'm okay. You know, like. Right. Yeah. Well, there was help like when we were getting together the, uh, the

speak and spell kind of thing for him. Like when we did that, I thought for sure like, okay, well he's, he must have a while then, you know, cause he's gonna have to use this for his speech. That takes a little while. Yeah. But yeah. So a lot of, uh, a lot of Facebook activity, I saw a lot of Twitter activity. I saw, uh, pictures of ants with, uh, Tim. People love Tim. They really did. Yeah. I was, I was thinking

about it. I was like, is it possible that his Teflon was even harder than Sunday Jeff's? Cause Sunday Jeff is widely beloved, but Tim. Yeah. And I said to, said to Troy who texted Wal-Ni earlier, I was like, I've never heard anything but anybody say negative, anything negative about the man. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's shocking. Yeah. He's just a great dude. I was... So it was really nice that I saw last night they were putting flowers on Jack's... Oh, really? Oh, I saw that. Yeah, it was in the paper too. Oh, yeah. So it was really nice that I saw last night they were putting flowers on Jax. Oh really? Oh I saw that, yeah it was in the paper too. Oh wow.

Or the online paper anyway. Oh that's great. Yeah I think he made a pretty big impact with people like beyond what we know. Oh yeah. I mean like, cause he's been at Jax forever so any regular customer of Jax goes in there and sees him and.

Yeah. I was like, Hey, it's Tim. How long was he at Jack's before he left? I think he started in the nineties. Wow. Yeah. He was there a long time. Yeah. Phew.

Yeah. It's a long stretch. Yeah. It's, it's. Tim the record, it's very clear. I went online. I looked, you know, I went on to, I guess we posted that cartoon of him and man, the comments underneath it were like, I hope his family is getting a chance to see it because

it was one great thing after another. Yeah. I saw one of the comments was from his stepdaughter. Oh, okay. He said, yeah. Oh, I think I did see that. Yes, yes. Yeah, I had a lot of likes. Right.

She was basically like, he really loved being a part of this, you know, the Tom, Steve, Dave, and he loved, well, the ants particularly. Right. Because everybody would go and see him. Even when I go to Red Bank, it's like, if I go to Red Bank, I would stop in and see him. Yeah. ALS, huh? Yeah. Yeah. Um, my God.

It's not a fucking thing in the world you can do about it. It's not a fucking thing. I mean, you're driving out here and you're just like, you know, and it's like, you guys knew him better than I did. Um, I was still pretty shook when I heard, you know what I mean? So I was feeling really bad for you guys. You know what I mean? Like my boys, I know you guys were both like close. I know Walt, you were very close to him and like.

Yeah. Well, I knew him. I knew of him long before I asked him to be on, involved with TSD. I told him, I got to tell him before that I wish I had asked him to be a part of it sooner, but I was intimidated by his look, which was not anywhere near like the inner. He looked to me like

a biker with all his tattoos and he looked like he stepped off out of the Hell's Angels catalog. At one point in life he was like, I fucking give up. Bring on the tattoos. And I was so into, he was a very large man too. And I was always like, well, I'm going to go ask him if he'd be involved. Because I would talk to him a little bit when he came into the stash or I would talk to him if I was in jacks. And I didn't know he had like a sense of humor or anything, you know? Yeah. Like, so, but when I did. Feelings. Yeah.

When I did talk to him, I realized how knowledgeable he was and how great he would be. But I, on Mike and how, like, I was like, oh, this guy would be great. But I always was like, oh, he'll think it's stupid, or he'll think it's goofy. And I was so intimidated to go over there and ask him. He's not lying. I remember all these reservations, invoicing them.

Yeah. And to get to know him through all the projects he was involved with us, I couldn't have been more wrong about, he may have looked like a tough biker, but he certainly was just. He was like a humble, aw shucks kind of guy. He didn't like, even if you compliment him, he's like, oh, it's okay. He didn't have any ounce of like that. What I thought do, like perception of him being like this tough, I'm just saying like this, like he looked like he would rather, like he would just as soon as like run you

over on his motorcycle then want to talk on mic. To me, that's what I always thought, that's what he looked like. But yeah, I couldn't have been more wrong. And I have every text that you know on my phone with him and I look back and I asked him in 2018 to be on PPP, Purveyors, Posers and Playlists. Not even right in the thing. I was like, and I looked back at the text, I was like, I danced around it for like, I'm doing this thing. I'd like you to be involved. Would you want to be involved?

It's, you know, you have to like judge songs. And he was like, yeah, I guess, sure. And anytime after that, like he tackled any number of goofy, ridiculous scenarios that I would ask him, like, hey, would you do this without hesitation, maybe a little hesitation. Yeah, I was going to say, like, I liked the part of him that was like, this is stupid, let's do this. Like, I liked that part of him, you know, where he's like, I can't believe I'm in,

like you would see it on his face. I mean, I think, back to one of the stupidest things I asked him to do, what came out so good is we did this music video where everybody in Tesdy town dressed up in a rubber Kaiju costume. Yeah. For something I was working on, and I asked him to come down and get into this

ridiculous rubber monster suit and play guitar, like a real guitar. or something that I was working on, and I asked him to come down and get into this ridiculous, rubber monster suit and play guitar, like a real guitar. Yeah. And I know he's not that kind of guy that was like, so I need you to stand in front of the green screen, by yourself and do this, and act like you're rocking out. And he was definitely self-conscious about it. But I look back in that video,

he's the only one out of all of us that doesn't look like a complete nutter dork. Even in the rubber suit. He moved and acted like a rock star. Like he looks cool playing the guitar and doing that. And it feels like that was just yesterday. It just feels like there's no way. And then my God, then when I asked him, because you know how awesome he was on Purveyors,

I was like, I have this other thing I'd like to bounce off you, which was the kiss one. Yeah. And I remember telling him what I wanted to do with it. And first he said, I don't like kiss. Yeah. I was like, that's great. I love that. Now I got two of them. And I was like, I don't care that you don't like kiss. I was like, I just want somebody with your knowledge and your humor, because it was a different type of humor. I guess it was kind of sarcastic, but never jaded though.

Right, self-effacing. His jokes, nobody else would say the jokes that he made. And I don't know, it's just, but I remember telling him that we're going to do, I wanted to do the kiss one and he said, okay, I'll do it. And initially, then I had the text though, I had the text, I was like, I have this idea, I hope you're up for it, but every episode I wanna do in full white makeup, face paint, and we'll do it. And before we decided to do masks,

then I was like, well masks will be a lot easier. But he was like, okay, I'll do it. Anything, anything he was up for and did it with the utmost, he respected the most ridiculous proposition for me. Great is that. And did it with amazing effort. Like he just, he wanted it to be good. Yeah.

Yeah, man. He, I remember when I, you know, we did the PPP and I remember when, when I, you know, we did the PPP and I was like, when he would pick my song as the winner, it felt like I really won something. You know what I mean? Like, like it felt like, yeah, yeah. You're like, Oh man, like I don't, I want him to agree with me. I know exactly the way you feel. Cause there were some times when we were on PPP and it was like right on the fucking bubble, like whether or not my team was going to win. And like when he was like, Oh yeah, I like Brian's song better.

I'm like, Oh my God. Yeah, there was something to it. Yeah, it was great. I remember after the first time I lost a PPP round and I kind of went into like the sore loser mode. He left, I think it was the rap one with Who Let the Dogs Out, he left the recording rather abruptly after we were done. And he texted me later and was like, hey, and I hope you're not mad at me.

I know you were pretty upset with losing. And I was like, no, no, no, bro. I was like, it's not real. It's not real. I go, I'm not mad. I go, you were awesome. And he was really taking it back, I guess, that I kind of threw a little tantrum on Mike that I lost.

But he didn't. He didn't get it. Yeah. Then after that, he got it. And I was like, dude, it's never serious. I don't, like, I'm not being, you know, that was all an act. And after that, yeah, he didn't have any reservations about shitting on any of my selections. But when he first showed up, he was like, almost a guest at the way we were treating each other.

Yeah. He's like, I've never seen people like this before. I remember you talking. It was going to be a fun game. They're fucking tearing each other apart. I was looking back through some of the texts and he, do you remember the, um, the picnic Olympics that we did? I asked him to be a part of that. I don't even know what year that was.

It was a while ago, but he was good at it too. Like he was pretty fucking good on that field. He initially said he didn't want to do it. He felt like it wasn't his thing. You know, I was like, we're going to play this, we're going to do this, we're going to do this. He's like, no. And I was like, are you sure? He's like, all right, I'll come.

But then I found out later that he almost didn't come. He actually wrote a text. He told me he had a really great time after the Picnic Olympics and how much fun it was. But he said he was going to text me that morning and bow out because he just didn't think. And I'm so glad that he came and did that because that was an awesome afternoon. And he was one of the, he excelled on the field in a way that- But that would have been like his first, maybe like his first exposure to all everybody. So it was kind of like, I think he felt a little self-conscious

because he knew me and Bri, but he didn't know the rest of the crew that was involved in everything. So for him to come out and have a good time, I saw the text about how much he enjoyed that afternoon. Wow, man. I'm glad he was part of this. You know what I mean? He just... It's so... Waltz has an ability to pick out ringers. He sure does, doesn't he? Yeah. Like anybody he brings over to Tuzdy Town, you're like, all right, this guy's okay. Yeah. You know?

I mean, my last one may have been questionable. That's true, yeah. Because the jury's out on Mark, the jurors from Jersey Coin, but it was I mean, my last one may have been questionable. That's true, yeah. That might have been a- The jury's out on Mark, the jurors from Jersey Coin, but we're still warming people over. An unusual L for Flannigan. Oh, man. I was talking to Jimmy last night and I was telling him, cause he asked me, you know, about the kiss series that we did and we have six unreleased kiss episodes.

And I know they're in the last three that we did, he did after getting his diagnosis. Okay. And so it's for him to make that, you know, what he's dealing with. He found the time to come down and do that. Yeah. He wanted to finish it. It was probably, Walt too, like think about the you, I don't know, we're all gonna start crying I guess, but what you gave him was like, it was probably great for him to come down here and do the

kiss spot and laugh and not think about the fucking absolute horror show that he was faced with. Even just for a little bit. Yeah, if you hadn't involved him in, like this was gonna happen to him either way, right? And it's horrible, but like, it's nice that you were able to give him, cause people loved him.

And I think Tim really enjoyed being a part of this. Like I think it brought something to him that maybe he wasn't even expecting. You know? Like who the fuck at his age expects to suddenly become like, you know? Yeah, like people will like go out of their way to come see you at work.

Yeah. Just to take a picture with you. And everybody said the same thing. They're like, he was so nice. He gave me and my girlfriends some t-shirts, you know. He gave me a Ribeye Brothers album. Like he will refuse to accept money for things. That's, yeah.

There's so many accounts of aunts who met him, who were blown away by how cool he was to the listeners when they came in and mentioned how much they enjoyed his involvement. But I was telling Jim, I'm like, releasing those episodes will be difficult. But his commitment to, you know, he wanted to finish it. He told me, I want to finish it. Let's knock it out. Wow. But I'm like, they're like a gift, but it feels like they're still, but there was six, there's actually seven episodes. He was on something, he was called on time capsule with Brian and Michelle.

So there's like seven things, but I said to Jim, I'm like, I want to release them and you know, because to fulfill like him asking, you know, saying he wants to finish it. And it feels like there's with those seven episodes, there's still more of him to give. But I don't know if I want that last episode release and then feels. That's it. That's it then. You released that last episode.

That's tough, man. Wow, that's heavy, dude. But I think you got to try and look at it from a different angle. You know what I mean? Like you can't, because you're gonna release it, right? Yeah. So... But that last kiss episode... Yeah. That's it then. Like there's still more of Tim.

Right. Yeah. As long as I don't release it. You're so right. It feels like just yesterday we were in the woods filming the opening to the kiss thing. It doesn't feel like it was years ago. Yeah. You know? Like us dressing up and acting all stupid and- That was 2019. Was it? Jesus.

Yeah. I just rewatched that last night, the opening. It's so fucking fun. It's so fun. Yeah. Yeah. There's like this part of me that's like as long as I don't release that last one, there's still like, there's like this part of me that's like, as long as I don't release that last one, there's still like, there's still something for him to give us. There's something still there to look forward to. That's a, that's a tough thought, but yeah, that is some deep shit, dude. Like I went down to Red Bank the other day. As a matter of, I was walking by, Jax was like, oh, fuck. Yeah, he's not there. Yeah, it just, it didn't occur to me in the moment, but then, uh, and I'm not sure

where he lives, so I was going to go to his house. But I think Walt, like, like what you brought him into is like, we know we've always known how special this is, what we do here. And, and, you know, for us, you know, I don't know about the rest of the world, but I think it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, Walt, like what you brought him into is like, we know, we've always known how special this is, what we do here. And you know, for us, you know, I don't know about the rest of the world, but for us, like what it means to us and everything like that.

And like, you know, I don't, I think a lot of people don't have that. You know what I mean? A lot of people don't get to experience what we get to do here. No, I mean, it's a unique, I mean, he sent me a text the day before, you know, saying, basically what he was saying goodbye and he was telling how thankful he was that we allowed him to come in and we treated him like family. Yeah. I said, well, that was because you were part of the TSD family.

It's just crazy that could go that fast. I can't believe it. Six months. So many listeners have reached out since we announced what he was dealing with. I cannot tell you how many people have dealt with this with relatives and everything. It's not as uncommon as I thought it was. Yeah, I thought it was really uncommon too, but I read it was like one in 400 people. Oh my God.

Which seems like a lot, right? Sure does. That's crazy. But... Scary. Yeah. Yeah, like there was people who said that they struggled with it for a decade. And so for it to go that fast is just stunning. It's like jaw dropping that it could happen that quick.

Yeah. I want to thank there was a listener who contacted me and he was a doctor and he spearheaded us getting the voice program going. I want to thank him and also all the aunts who volunteered to edit podcasts to help with that voice. And if I didn't get, we have more volunteers to edit than we need it. And I hope that I contacted and thanked everybody for at least inquiring. But we had so many, I may have missed a few, but I want to thank anybody who, who sent an email into volunteer to edit for Tim's Voice project.

And of course, everybody who bought the podcast, his benefit podcast on Van Camp. We could actually go back like the lost Tim tapes and have like, since we have his voice now, make him say all kinds of wild shit. Yeah. I tried to make a, I called Walt, I tried to make a joke with Walt on the phone.

Yes, it did not. It did not play at all. I thought you wrote, it felt like it was a real inquiry and I didn't know what to say. You caught me so off guard. Because he was saying he was texting with Tim and then he's going to... On Monday. Yeah, we were both crying, whatever, whatever, we were all over talking then I give us a pause and I go, did he ask for my number? I didn't say anything for like, I didn't know how to mine that minefield.

I thought he would just start laughing but it was silence. I was like, no, I'm kidding. And it was like we didn't record with, you know, unfortunately, we were running, he was just, his health wasn't, he wasn't up to snuff after he'd finished Kiss to do anything else, but we were still texting and not more than three weeks ago, like in the middle of the night, I got a text from him and we just started talking about Kojak and the conversation was so normal. Normal. He would never believe that. What he was dealing with. You just, you wouldn't even believe it, right?

There was no indication. He was cracking jokes, just like it was a normal evening. I mean, I would like to say, what else can you do, but I feel like if it were me in the moment, I would just like, that's all I can think about. There'd be no Kojak. No, I would be like fuck you and fuck Kojak. I'm dying over here. Shit on his fucking face. Fuck you Kojak, I'm dying here.

Somehow he made a Kojak joke and I was like, oh you're a fan? And because I didn't know he was, we started just going at, you know, for like a half hour about Kojak episodes and how much we enjoyed it. And I would text with him again, but in between that and yet in one day, but not that kind of in depth where it just didn't feel like he was sick. Yeah. But I think that's like, you know, I keep going back to what I'm saying about like what we have here and what you did by inviting him into us. I don't know if it's

gonna make you feel better. No, I mean, No, I understand. But you brought something so good to the guy's life. And the alternative to texting you about Kojak and having fun, I'm sure, is sitting there in that fucking bed worrying about the progression of this. Right, it's just another day closer. It's just another day closer. Right, and so it's like another thing to even have

Walt to text Kojak with is crazy. Because there's not a lot of people he could text Kojak with, even if he was completely healthy. His options are very limited. Yeah, if he texted me, I would have been like, I've seen it. New phone, who dis? I can't speak with any real knowledge about it.

Except his brother was in it, right? Oh, yeah, yeah, Telly Falls' brother. Yeah, not very good. Oh, okay. I put brother in it. That's what I heard about Kojak. I was like, wait, what? Tim's brother. Oh, man, though.

It is crazy. But he did get to, I mean, because he worked on the lights with Magnet, right? Monster Magnet, what did he do the lights for? He was, he was, he did a lot of stuff with them, I remember we, me and you, Brian, went to see, long before we were friends with them, Magnet was doing a, on, what's it called, unplugged? An unplugged acoustics performance in Woodbridge at a record store. And I didn't really know Dave at that point either. I knew of him, but I wouldn't say we were friends. I remember him selling me comics at that point. And I wanted to go and we went up and Tim was playing the bongos on it. And I remember being like, I would still tell him, I'm like, man, I remember that day I

saw you doing the bongos. I mean, that was the baddest ass anybody's ever looked doing the bongos. I said, like, it's hard to look cool and badass playing the bongos. I said, but you did it. I said. It's like him and Matthew McConaughey naked. I don't know what that is. I told him, I was it. I said, it's like him and Matthew McConaughey naked. I don't know what that is. I was, I told me like, I was like, I think Ricky Ricardo was before you. It's just Ricky Ricardo and then you, I said, are the two bad asses, whoever did bongos.

I didn't have the Matthew McConaughey in my room. You got arrested for bonging naked. Oh, what's really? Yeah, Texas. Really? He was playing bongo. He was living in Texas, I think Austin. I just read his book, that's how I know the story too. He's playing bongo and he's smoking weed, I guess, and the cops came and arrested him and they dragged him out of the house naked. They didn't

even let him put clothes on and shit like that. For some of the most harmless shit you can do, smoking a little weed and playing some bongos. Naked in your own house. Why can't you be naked in your own house? But Tim outcooled him. Yeah, he did. When I asked him to be on the new, I knew he didn't know at the time, but I knew he was dealing with something. And I asked him to be on the bright and the shells time capsule. And he said that, well, I might be dealing with something

and maybe you should ask somebody else. And it's tough because I gave him that like, I was like, no, no, I want you, I want you to do it. I go, you know that you'll be all right to do it. I gave that kind of like false, you know that you'll be right to do it. I gave that kind of false, you know. You're fine. Do what I need you to do. I was like, there is nobody else I'd rather have than you on it. I said, you'll be happy you did it. And I was wrong, no. I think people first started, like around Christmas, people started

first noticing like his voice. And when he was telling me like, when it first happened, he was talking about having the acid reflux. I thought that was like, cause you know, I had that before and I was like, all right, well, that's not too bad. You know, like you can, you can get that fixed. I mean, it's, because I had that before and I was like, all right, well, it's not too bad. You can get that fixed. Oh, it's horrible. I mean, it's horrible in the moment. Sure. Oh yeah. There's no worse pain,

but it's like he can get it fixed. I had no idea, didn't even dream that it would be so serious. I don't know who suggested it, but the last Christmas episode, suggested it, but the last Christmas episode, that was a massive room full of Testy town residents and somebody suggested we take that photo on the stairs. Yeah. And I didn't want to take it, but I'm glad we took it. Yeah. Yeah.

He was on the stairs. I mean, it just seems like fucking, we just did it. Yeah. Yeah, he's at the very top of the stairs. He was like me, he didn't want to take the photo either. I know he didn't want to take it. Yeah. Yeah, he's at the very top of the stairs. He's like me, he didn't want to take the photo either. I know he didn't want to take it, but he took it. I'm glad we got it. We got to get that framed in here, I guess.

It's hanging up. Yeah. It's hanging up. That was the photo that Gatum didn't hang out for like six months. Oh. But he did, he got it up. And yeah.

And covered it in green screen. No, no, it's over his desk. Oh, okay. Yeah, it will never get it in green screen. No, no, it's over his desk. Oh, okay. Yeah, it will never get covered with green screen. Jesus, man. Yeah, oof. I know. Do you know, Walt, do you know if he had like, did the doctors tell him like, look, you can

expect to live this long or did he have no idea really? You never mentioned it to me. He told me at the Christmas pod, because I told him, I was like, hey, when he was leaving for that night, I was like, I'm going to text you. I said, I have this thing I want to do. Because Nichelle had come down and pitched time capsule. And when he told me the concept, I was like, the one guy that's got to be on it, I said, is Tim. I mean, he's the perfect The one guy that's got to be on it, I said, is Tim. He's the perfect person to, it's almost like PPP in a way. You put up things to put a time capsule and everybody judges. Yeah, I remember.

We played this. I played this with you. Yeah. He said, well, I'm not feeling too good right now. I'm dealing with something. But he, at that point, wasn't sure. It really was, as crazy as this sounds, it was the second to last kiss recording that he knew.

He came and recorded two episodes of kiss and then we were scheduled for the next day to record the final one. And he knew before that and he had me that prior and so he knew but he was like I want to get it done I want to I want it'll be nice to have it a commission he is crazy like he would make some gallows humor jokes and he wanted me to promote the kiss pod. He said he knew that it wasn't a popular one amongst the ants. He said, you can tell, where's that joke at? I copied it, that I might not be around by the time the last kiss episode airs,

but you can promote it as the first podcast series to finish and say it was so grueling that it actually killed one of the podcasters. Just putting it out there, he said. That's how I like to think I'd be. Yeah, right? Yeah, yeah. I don't think I would be though.

I don't know if I could have the ability to separate it and joke about it, but man. I guess there's just- He did. Yeah, I mean, unless there isn't, there has to be a moment of acceptance. Because you grow up, you go through life and you see how these horrible things happen

and you're like, well, that happens to other people. You know, it doesn't happen to you. Yeah. Yeah, but you're like, well, that happens to other people. You know, it doesn't happen to you. Yeah. You know, um. Yeah. But you talk about the, like, I went back and watched the opening, the kiss intro last night too. And it's like, what rhyme or reason is there that the four of us will go into

the woods and one of us will, we'll, we'll get this though. There was no way to know. And one of us will get this though. There was no way to know. It was just a random thing that just boggles your mind. I'm walking around Walmart last night because my wife wanted to run some errands and I'm like, what am I doing walking around Walmart? I should be, I don't know, what should I be doing though? What should I be doing? It doesn't make any sense. That has a way of doing that to people though. It's like,

you're almost by example, you're like, well, I mean, you can only assume Tim could do very limited things in his last days, but taking that, you're like, yeah, I got to live life to the fullest now because otherwise, you never know when it's coming. That's the lesson here you're like, yeah, like I got to live life to the fullest now, because otherwise, you know, like you never know when it's coming. That's the lesson here is like, you never know when it's coming. But I feel like I was, I should be doing something, although I didn't know what it was other than walking around Walmart, you know, just earlier in the morning, he, you know, did what he had to do and I'm walking around Walmart. It doesn't make any sense.

I guess it's a matter of perspective because like, you know, it's like when we say like you have to appreciate, you know, what you have and like, there are circumstances, probably horrible circumstances, but there are circumstances where you are like, I would do anything to be in Walmart with Deb shopping right now. You know what I mean? Those circumstances are out there. And like where you could sit there and be like, I would fucking give my legs just to be in Walmart with Deb right now. So it might just be about like,

realizing that you're doing what you should do, you know, and just appreciating no matter what you're doing. Yeah, no matter how small it is. Like you could say I'm a fucking walking around Walmart, or you could be like, I love this woman. You know what I mean? This is the love of my life. This is my sweetheart and I'm with her. And we're healthy and we have a beautiful grandchild and I'm in Walmart with her and...

Yeah, it just feels like I'm just telling everyone, I'm like, I don't know what to do and it feels like I should do something than just... Well, maybe it feels that way because you can't do anything. ...do a mundane shopping errand and know it's like that's... Like, I don't even know was thinking about that. I was thinking about that. I was thinking about that. I was thinking about that. I was thinking about that. I was thinking about that. I was thinking about that.

I was thinking about that. I was thinking about that. I was thinking about that. I was thinking about that. I was thinking about that. I was thinking about that. I was thinking about that. I was thinking about that.

I was thinking about that. I was thinking about that. I was thinking about that. I was thinking about that. I was thinking about that. I was thinking about that. I was thinking about that. I was thinking about that. I was thinking about that. I was It's like, life just fucking goes on. I don't know how

horrible shit is. I was thinking about that when I was driving here. And I got off Parkway and I was coming around that turn. And I was thinking about Tim, obviously, because you know, we're driving out here, and I knew we're gonna do this. And, you know, this horrible thing just happened. And I was like, and I was looking at the road. And I was like, the road and I was like, this is the same road I drove last week. Everything just goes on. Exactly what you're saying. You could

be like, well, what happens after I die? But you're like, fucking everything. Everything that happened before you died, it just goes on and on and on. It's kind of depressing in some way, kind of freeing in another way. And then you go on a long enough time. I mean, this was what I was thinking, just driving over there, he said, come here. And I'm like, you're just like, it's like, none of it, you know, in the end, you know, the earth will fucking boil away to nothing

and we'll all be gone. So what's the best you could hope for? And I guess it's like, after you go that people care that you lived, you know what I mean? Yeah. And he, you know what I mean? Yeah. And he, you know, sure seems like people care that he lived, you know? And it's like, what more could you get?

You know, I don't know, I don't know. The only thing that sucks is that you can't look down and be like, oh wow, look how much people cared. Like you don't know. Or maybe you can. Yeah, maybe. We don't know shit, like we don't know anything. It's true.

Or maybe like, much like the Dalai We don't know shit. Like we don't know anything. True. Or maybe like much like the Dalai Lama, Tim is reborn as a baby. Like we should bring records. What do they bring to the Dalai Lama? When like they bring like three of his possessions and if the baby picks, like there's two that are not correct and one that is.

And if the baby picks it up, like it's proof that it's- Then it's the Dalai Lama. Yeah, like maybe we need to get like one One of Tim's things, find a little – A new llama. Yeah. Yeah, it's heavy shit. Well, you know, I can't imagine what you're going through because I don't know, you also don't deal with stuff like this all that often. No, no.

Like last time was Marco, right? Yeah. Well, I know you're mother-in-law. Thank, yes, my mom. Yeah. Yeah, but it's, you know, we're getting to that age. Oh yeah. Yeah, there's no denying. So you're right though, that like, you better acknowledge and appreciate things you can still do, because at one point you're not going to be able to do them. And hopefully that's a long time from now. And it's weird how it's a lesson that we have to keep relearning. Right.

Because I had a captain in my firehouse, Captain Nybro, Gary Nybro, and one of the greatest fucking guys you could ever meet. Like just fireman's fireman. And like, if he could help you, he helped you. And he was at 9-11. He retired a couple of years back. Six months after he retired, he was dead from lung cancer, from tongue cancer. 9-11 related tongue cancer. And this is a guy that I worked with 24 hours, you know,

a shift and helped me with a lot of stuff personally. And you learn that lesson then and then like, you forget. You just forget. It's like, you know, and. That's life going on. That's life going on. You just can't, no matter how close you were to the person, you can't obsess on it nonstop, otherwise you're done for.

Yeah, but I wish we were better at holding on to the silver lining. Holding on to the meaning and not allowing that to fade and letting little stupid shit affect you when you know that shit's meaningless and that every day to day mundane shit that annoys you or puts you in a bad mood means nothing. It means nothing. It means nothing. It means nothing. And there's that saying, like, if, um, there's that saying, right? Like if you're, if you're, if you're healthy, you have a million problems. If you're sick, you have one problem, you know?

And it's like, that's, it's true. It's just like, you gotta get sick to realize that there's someone that you care about has to do, you know, go out like this for you to realize it. But man, I don't know. But we're also, the three of us are also like cynical dudes. You know what I mean? Like it's hard to keep us on a positive, like, like loving hook, you know, sometimes I think. Yeah. Yeah. I don't want that though to, you know, you, you struggle. You don't want that to happen. I'm not going to allow little stupid shit bother me or affect me and realize that it's so trivial and so meaningless, but eventually it'll creep in again, you know, after a while. And I hope

that it doesn't happen. I think that's just human nature. Right? I mean, like distance from anything. You can't walk around an open wound all the time. Yeah. But yeah, it's a, I mean, that's a good, good philosophy. You don't, you know, don't sweat the small stuff. Plenty of books about it.

Yeah. Um, but God damn it. If it isn't hard sometimes. I know. Like just driving down the highway and like some asshole cut you off, you're like, what the fuck? Jerk off.

Yeah. And it sends you into a mood. Yeah. You know what Tim loved? Me undies. Oh, we're monetizing it. I got up to the best Tim. I know you're up there looking down.

Tim didn't work at Jack's for free. He got a paycheck. Oh man, that's some segue. I was wondering if, and this is gonna sound like a joke, but this is one thing that popped in my mind after we spoke the other night, Walt, thinking about Tim and I was like, I don't know why this popped in my head,

but I was like, I wonder if Jimmy the hair guy is gonna get a Tim tattoo? It just popped in, it just fucking the thought popped in my head and I was like, oh. He is now. Yeah, yeah, maybe, maybe. You've put the pressure on now, if he doesn't it's like. He's let me down before, maybe. Maybe. You've hit the pressure on now. If he doesn't, it's like... He's let me down before, Jimmy. I wonder...

He got one of Ralph's Cirilla from The Stern Show. Right. So if he got that, he was actually buddies with Tim. Yeah, I mean, I think he might do a memorial tattoo. You're right. He's kind of back to doing a corner now. Thankfully, getting a tattoo for him is like blowing his nose. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He'll do it.

Oh, man. Well, Jimmy the Hair Guy, if you want to get it, I'll pay for it, bud. Yeah? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Remove it, because I know how he is about money and his wedding and stuff like that, so we can remove that from him. That's true, yeah. That obstacle out of the way.

So what should I do? Should I do these? Yeah, of course. Tim would have wanted you to. He would have. Okay. We all know summer is amazing. Sunshine road trips, beach days, but can we be honest for a second? It also means one thing, sweat. And if you're not wearing the right underwear, that gets real uncomfortable real fast. And that's why you got to swear by me undies. Their micro modell fabric is legit magic, super soft, breathable, and somehow stays cool even when it's 90 and your ace is losing the battle.

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I mean, I should have said it was still as comfortable as hell, but you know what? It wasn't. You can wear them backwards or frontwards. It's all the same. They're that comfortable on a pair of underwear, but you know what? Not the case. If you wear them backwards, it definitely feels weird. Makes you feel like you're wearing a girdle.

Let's see. What do we got here? We got Raycon. Sorry, my nephew is breaking up with his girlfriend. He's just trying to help her. How old is he? He's 16. So it's his first heartbreak.

That's a tough one. Yeah, so I'm just trying to... That's a tough one. He's got a great rock to get advice from. Yeah. I'm serious. Yeah. You give some of the best consoling advice of anybody I've ever met.

Oh, wow. That's modern day Q. If you would know 20s Q, give me advice. That's all right. That's okay. Who's asking a 20 year old for advice anyway? Kind of a fucking moron. He's lucky to be able to have you to talk to. Thank you. Did she break up with him or did he break up with her? It sounds like she broke up with him, yeah.

It sounds like a tough one. Sounds like he's going through it. Yeah, but it's all right. What's the underlying message? I'm just as developing right now. I don't have, I don't have, the techs are coming in right now, which is why I'm just as developing right now. I don't have, I don't have, but that's the texts are coming in right now, which is why I'm. Okay.

Okay. You got another one? I do. I have two more. Two more? Oh gosh. Yeah, I'll knock them out quick. Oh summer, more warmth, more light, more time to spend outside. Summer is a time to be out and about, enjoying every moment from sun up to sun down, but we all need a sidekick who can keep up so we can enjoy our favorite music podcasts

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I was so out of sorts today. I was preparing Teddy's lunch and my Factor lunch for me, and I mistakenly gave Teddy the Factor, and I ate his salmon, and I was like, wow, Deb, this Factor may have gone bad. I thought you were going to say it backwards and shove that up your ass. I'm not that out of sorts. You know where the factor goes. I still know where food goes, what hole goes in. Get started at factormeals.com slash tesd50off and use code tesd50off to get 50% off plus free

shipping on your first box. That's code tesd50off at at factor meals.com slash T S D 50 off for 50% off plus free shipping factor meals.com slash T E S D 50 off. Oh, wait, why am I reading here? All right. There's nothing. I think, I think it's really sweet that people are putting flowers at a isn't it? Isn't that just, it just really made me feel good

that like that, that such a, I wouldn't have thought of it. It's such a wonderful gesture to go to and put, they put like a picture of him on the sidewalk. Somebody did, just somebody knew him. I think I'm gonna take a drive up there after this and look at it. Check it out. Yeah. Yeah, I mean. Maybe pick up some flowers on the way and at him.

Cause you just want people to know that he mattered. You know what I mean? Like this guy was important, you know? And every, I guess, flower on is another testament to that, you know? You want him to have that. That showing. Yeah. Like Walt said earlier, like we showing. Yeah. Like Walt said earlier, like it's, like we knew that like he mattered to us,

but like to see the, what's that, what would you call that? The ripple effect? No, I mean the display, what would you call it? To see so many people. Oh yeah. Memorialize. Memorial, yeah. So many people come together and be like,

we liked him too. Yeah. You know, it's like, it shows, well he was a red bank fixture too, right? I mean, he was like, Oh wait, you know who we forgot too? Rob Bruce. God rest his soul. Yeah.

He was really the last one. Yeah, he was. Yeah. I, yeah, I didn't, yeah, I didn't mean that as a slight to forget him. Yeah. I know I was thinking about what you were telling me about the, uh, toxic chains that you had with them and I'm like, I keep trying to feel for you and I'm like, I don't get it.

It was devastating to read. I couldn't, I was like, okay, I must be dreaming right now. Like I said, he said how he was thankful that, you know, to be a part of TSD and to become friends with me and Brian and all the people that he met. And you guys treated me like family. And I wanted you to know that. I was just, oh man.

But like, that's kind of like beautiful. Like that's, I don't know many people who got a chance to tell people how they felt. I wonder if he sent any fuck yous or is it, or is it? That's your mind. That's a cute thought. Is this a fuck yous I think? Or are you in that moment? You're like, I'm not wasting a second of what I have left on a fuck you,

but I personally think I would send a couple of fuck yous. I might even blame some people over text. I mean, the way the world is today, you could do it. Forget text, you could do it on video. Yeah. And at the funeral, be like, okay, just in case you showed up. Yeah.

I would not, I think I would understand if this took you like a good long while to move fast because that's some heavy fucking shit, man. You know, there's no prepping for that. There's no. I guess there was a little bit. I felt like this is something, but I had heard stories of 10 years. Right. And I thought maybe they could slow the progress or the...

Not progress, what it would be called, slow the... Progression, yeah. Progression. So there was hope that this text would come many, many years down the line and it wouldn't be so fast. But you know, and I would, I just, it's just shocking that it could go that fast. It's almost like when people don't know that they have things, they last longer. It's almost seems like if you know, you tell somebody like, Oh, it turns out you have cancer. It's like, boom, they're gone. Yeah. Yeah. So that one Captain eyebrow tell somebody like, oh, it turns out you have cancer. It's like, boom, they're gone. Yeah.

Yeah. So what happened with Captain Nybrow was just like tongue cancer, gone. I had a couple of neighbors. I always remember this to the, you know, the guy worked his whole life. They were going to retire down to Florida. All they cared about was riding bicycles. All these two people cared about this guy and his wife. And they moved down to Florida. In less than six weeks, his wife died.

And in less than three months, he died. Oh my God. Yeah. Well, he was a heavy smoker, man. He used to smoke those filterless cigarettes, camels and shit. I don't know. I can't remember if she smoked or not, but yeah, like just like that fast. Like decades of bike riding ahead of you.

You think you're going to be riding bikes until your fucking legs fall off. Yeah. The next thing you know, it's like, oh wait, now my bicycle riding partner is gone? I mean, maybe that's what it is. It just makes you give up, say fuck it. Yeah. I want to have a bike by myself. But then there are people who like, their partner dies at like 80 and they go and get

a girlfriend, you know, or boyfriend or something. There might be a different perspective at that age. You know what I mean? I think if you get into those high 80s, low 90s, like maybe you just have a different perspective on it all. We were like, I'm used to it. I don't know. I don't know.

Women have to deal with it more than men, right? Because usually it's the dudes dying off. Usually the dudes dying off, yeah. I remember my grandmother just going through the paper constantly, like every one of her friends died before she did. Every single one of them, she would look in the paper and be like, oh, so and so died.

Or she would get a phone call, so and so died. I don't know. Like at the end, when we went to the hospice, like it seemed like she was like, fuck this shit. I want out. I want out. Yeah. That was my grandmother.

My grandma was like, I am ready to, my grandfather too, like, I'm just ready to go, which I couldn't understand. I was in my twenties and I'm like, I don't get it. Like now I'm 49 and I'm like, oh, I'm kind of, I am getting it. I'm getting it. On a, on a, on a worse day, you might be like, all right, take me. Yeah. Man. He grew up in this area? Yeah, Keensburg.

Keensburg. Yeah. 62? 62 or three. 63, I think. Man. Is it natural, you think, to have thoughts of like, cause I remember thinking like, he's only 63. I'm like, I'm telling you, Mary Beth, I'm like, that's six years older than me. Oh yeah.

I'm like, that could be, like, that could be me. Yeah. It's just like, thank fucking Christ. It isn't, but like, God, the poor bastard with these, like the odds. Yeah. That's, that's the part that would get me. The odds. Yeah, the odds. That's why I say it's like we all went into the woods that morning. I think we filmed that on a Sunday morning and one out of the four would get this and it's like, why? How? Why him? Why wasn't... It's just crazy.

And then again, there's somebody that's going to win the lottery today. You know, completely different end of the spectrum. I mean, statistically speaking, you guys who went into the woods are pretty safe from this now, right? Like it's... Like if statistically one of us was gonna get it, I mean, one of us got it. Right.

So. And even then he was bucking the odds, right? 400 to one or something. Yeah. So, you know, maybe you can feel good in that way. Yeah. Yeah, it's just..., maybe you can feel good in that way. Yeah. Yeah, it's just... It's hard to feel good.

Yeah, I don't know. There's no way to like... It's just so stunning and heartbreaking, man. And, uh, it's a good dude. He was a good dude. Yeah, he was a fucking great guy. That's the thing that really sucks. It's like if it was some asshole that you kind of like a neighbor or something, that you're like, oh, well, he's not going to be. Yeah.

No, it's one thing. But like I said, like there was, there was no one who wasn't like Tim's a great guy, they would come back and fucking tell you once they went to Jack's. Yeah. What a great guy he was. How nice he was. Yeah. He was so fucking funny.

Like he was just so like, so I can't like, yeah. Without even trying. Yeah. Like he just looked at something for what it was. It was just so like, so I can't like, Yeah. Without even trying. Yeah, like he just looked at something for what it was. It was like, well that's fucking lots. Yeah. You know? Yeah.

The look on his face when like he'd be looking at Gettem say something like that. It was, it's, it's. His and Windorf's introduction to Gettem were two of my favorite moments. Just like what, is this a real person? Windorf, I think the first time Wendorf met him, he was, he made the claim that Getum lost weight

by walking in concentric circles in his room. And that line always stuck with me. I'm like, that is so fucking funny. Like, that was fun. You know, Getum was all skinny and shit. Oh, God, that made me laugh. Concentric circles. Yeah. God God, that made me laugh. Concentric circles. Yeah.

God damn, man. Yeah, I don't know what else to say. Goodbye, Tim. Yeah. I hope there's, he's just doing whatever, like singing all the bands that he loved that are no longer here. Just, I just hope it's exactly

what you hope it to be. Yeah. And it might be. Who the fuck knows? Nobody knows. The only thing that I've come to realize in my life is like, if I think I know something, it just means that it's not what I think it is. Everything. Yeah. I went to lunch with Mary Beth today. She told me with such certainty that this isn't it. She goes, after you die, that's not it. As if she knew. Yeah.

Like, what do you know, Junior? Yeah, what do you... Fuckin' 30 years old. Little fuckhead. Come to me when you're fucking almost 60 and tell me this shit. I just feel like if I say there's a heaven, that means there's no heaven. I'll just get it wrong. I'll just get it wrong. Why do you think that though? Because you feel... Your perception to me is that you're pretty spot on. I feel like... I don't feel... I appreciate you saying that. I don't feel that way. And I feel

like... I don't even know if it's a me thing. I think that the limitations of the human perception and the human mind have locked us into a universe where we just don't really know what the fuck's going on. We don't understand anything. And it's like how like they used to think thunder was like angry gods. Like, you know, it's like, we're still in that... I think we all live in that, that, like, you know, like, cats could see UV light, right? And see different colors in us and stuff like that. And it's like, that shit is going on constantly around us. Like, everything we can't see and everything we can't hear

and everything, like, there's a whole world that is, like, like just outside of human senses because we've only developed what we need to survive. And it's just like, those are the ones we know about. Like what are the things that we don't fucking know about that are out there? And that's why it's not really a me thing. I just feel like there's no way for us to fully grasp the universe. We're like, so any guesses that we make have to be wrong because we don't even have fucking a tenth of the information to make these things. We make up God to explain things that we don't understand. And it's comforting to be like, well, sure, there's a reason for all this because we don't understand it, but there's a God above who does understand it. But, so that's why I'm saying,

if I could imagine it as what's going on, it's definitely not that. It's just definitely not that, you know what I mean? Because I don't have the information to imagine what it really is, you know? Right. So, you know, we boil it down to, well, when you die, do you go on or is it over?

I was just like, all right, what are the third options that we don't even fucking know about? What are the fourth, fifth, 10th option that we just don't even have a clue are options because we just don't know anything? So. Yeah, I mean, it depends on who you ask. Like some people will be like,

oh, you're dead on the ground. Other people are like, oh, you're gonna be reincarnated. Okay, those are the two options. Like I either go on or I don't, like that's it. I, you know, I don't know. I don't know. And those options, by the way, were created 10,000 years ago.

Like, it's not like these are new options. Like, since we were shitting in fucking holes, you know, in the woods, you know, coming down from the trees, those were the only two options. So there's just no way that we're spot on about it. Something else has gotta be out there. It would be nice though to be one of these hyper religious

people who are like, I know. They're not saying that they think. I fucking know. They know. It must be a source of comfort. Sure. I'm sure. I don't know.

I know. It's crazy. And it's like all this, this just cracks open. It's just all in your head, you know, when something like this happens. But it's brutal. And he, you know, 62 is no spring chicken, but it's still too young.

It's still too young. Yeah, it is. It just feels like it's just too young, like you said. Like another 20 years easy should have been in that guy's pocket. You know. Just wasn't. Just wasn't.

Heartbreaking. Yeah. I especially question God when I see things like this past Texas flood where it's like, not only did it kill a bunch of people, not only did it kill a bunch of kids, but it killed a bunch of kids at a Christian camp. Like, if God's not looking out for them, why would He look out for a shithead like me? That's a question worth asking, I guess. Yeah. I know that shit's just going on. And even like this, you see those images

of those starving kids. You know, it's just easy to just be like, hey shit, shit's going on on the other side of the world. But I don't know, it's hard. You got a snorory dog underneath you. Yeah. He's been very helpful. Yeah. He's like a therapy dog. A therapy dog.

Yeah. He doesn't leave my side. Comfort dog. It's nice. Yeah. He's a good dog. He's a good dog. He came to your life at the right time. Oh yeah. That's for sure. Yeah.

Yeah. Well, we'll, you know, I don't think we'll stop mentioning Tim anytime soon. No. You know, he'll be around here. Yeah, he will be greatly missed. And like I said, I still have this feeling of like he's still kinda here because of those episodes.

And it is a kind of somewhat comforting that there's still more of him for me to... For us to release. But boy, that last one, man, I don't know. Reminds me, do you remember in Sopranos when Bobby Bacala's wife died and she had made one last plate of lasagna? Janice cooked it. Janice cooked it, yeah, he wouldn't eat it.

He's like, it's the last one she made. Like, and he waited a really long time before he ate it. Yeah, I get that too. Never his, whenever he would, when he, did he, I don't know, did he come up with it? Is it unfuckwithable? Was that his, did he coin that? Who? Tim. Tim? I don't know, I never heard it before, so maybe.

Unfuckwithable? Yeah. Yeah, I get it. I get what he means. Yeah, he, I mean, he's a, I thought he made it up or maybe he heard his honor, but yeah, I remember I saw someone used it like in a nice little post about him because he had used it to describe something that was perfect, he said. Oh wow.

Unfuckable is something that's perfect. He used it to describe Slayer. I agree with him. Oh, that's great. Have you ever heard that before? No. That's the first word I ever heard saying it. I don't know if he made it up or not.

I'm going to say he made it up. Why don't we just go with it. Let's give it to him. Let's give it to him, man. Unfuckwithable. I'm going to, I wish it wasn't a curse in it because I was like, you know how you could buy like bricks that have likes things on it? Like, uh, maybe, you know, buy a brick somewhere that says, unfuck withable.

It's in the record store guy. And he was I was looking back through texts and. As he he kind of held back when he when we were playing PPP, because I would have to give him the songs that people were picking beforehand so he could do a little research. He was so brutal to some of these songs, like in between me and the text. He's like, what the fuck's wrong with this person picking this? He's like, dude, do they have an ear, he goes?

But he wasn't as vicious on Mike and he wouldn't tear him apart. But boy, I was looking back, it was funny how he was much more apt to tear the song apart in text than he was on Mike, though. Oh, that is funny. Yeah. I almost wish we could take those Kiss episodes, I know they're not all out yet, I don't know,

I'm just talking, and put them on a cassette and bring them to Jax and bring them to Jackson, sell them there. You know what I mean? You know what I mean? Like, I'd be like, a little picture of Tim and be like, you guys didn't know this, like everybody came in here and loved him,

but he did this, you know what I mean? And this was part of his legacy. And this way, people who don't know Tell Him, See You Dave, or don't know anything about this have the ability to enjoy his work? It would be, I don't know though if Kiss would be okay with the selling. All that trademark music and logos

and all the masks we're wearing and the costumes. Gene might have a bone to pick where he's gonna find this first. I don't know. Yeah, that's just a cease and desist, right? That's all it is, yeah. Well, I... Jack, you're probably gonna get a lever. Yeah, yeah, don't freak out.

Something I was working on, it's weird that you had mentioned this, something I was working on for a long time with BS Jet... Mm-hmm. ...was we're gonna take every episode of the kiss pod and release it as a box set and make it look like CDs, but there were DVDs. And BS Jet put me, Bry, Sunday and Tim inserted into all the albums like perfectly. You're talking like the artwork is stunning for the most intricate album where

like if you look at it real fast, you think it's just a normal Kiss album, but it's actually us on the cover. It's so well done. And that was what I was working on. But since the episodes were never finished, I never, you know, one day I was going to release this. And unfortunately, he didn't get, he got to see the artwork and I would show him the artwork every time a new CD cover came in.

Oh, that's cool. But we'd ever got the edited versions in time to release it, you know, the box that I wanted to release. But you think you'll still? I'm going to do it. Yeah, that's awesome. I mean, the artwork is stunning and he loved it. It looks just like a CD from Kiss, but it's awesome. That's great, man.

This is great, dude. That it? What do you think? Yeah. Send off for Tim. Yeah, I mean, I'm sure he'll come up many more times, but sure. I think it's, you know,

I'm real sorry guys. I know you guys really were close to him and stuff like that. Well, like I'm sorry. That's. Thank you. Can't imagine. Tell him Steve, Dave.