Tell Em Steve-Dave - #647: Catman

Episode Date: August 3, 2025

The county fair, Sydney Sweeney uproar, fantastic 4, Naked Gun, shrinkage, Will Smith, the ‘Friends’ of TESDTown.

Hey, before we begin the show, I thought I'd take this moment for a very quick Patreon update. If you're not a member, this is the month to join the TSD Patreon, as we have two, count them, two new shows premiering in August. Up first, Cartoon Tunes. This is a show I'm really hoping gets good feedback, as I'd love to do 100 episodes. The premise is simple. I, along with a TESdy Town member and Teddy, drive

to a car hop eatery and talk cartoons and music tunes based upon an idea by Brian Rupert, who is also filming and editing the show. And I want to congratulate the Rupert family upon the arrival of the newest addition to the family, Vivien. Also debuting in August is the premiere episode of the comic book game show, Beat the Baron. If you like elephants in the room, then you should love Beat the Baron. A ton of work by myself and Chuck has gone into it and I really think it shows. And the $5 tier will be getting the video for Beat the Baron episode 1. So just these two episodes alone,

I think are worth the $5 it takes to join the TSD Patreon in August. But you not only get those two episodes, you also get more TSD content than you can shake a stick at. So I implore you, if you want to join up, don't try shaking your stick, just stop. It's not worth the embarrassment, you look like a fool. All right, let's start the show

killer Wag your finger the other way because I don't give a fuck. That's homegrown American talent. Tell him Steve, Dave. Hello and welcome to this week's edition of Tell Him Steve, Dave. Here with Q. What's going on? Here with Wul. I don't want to put any pressure on my – last week I opened with that high energy and then had to keep it up the whole time.

So if I start with real low energy, anything that goes up. Well, you build to a crescendo. Yeah. People are like, yeah. Or you got to have like a vein popping out of your forehead by the end. Right. Yeah. It has to look dangerous and pulsating. Well, Q is a hard out today.

Not that hard. It's a three hour window, isn't it? Well, he has a hard out because he's doing a little thing with some kittens. Yeah. Can I tell you about this? No, I heard about it though. I hear things. I hear things around. I told you about this. Yeah, I got another kitten. Boris' newest niece born in my yard. And she's been there three months now. And I captured her, Walt, and got her to the vet, which is always oddly emotional for me

when I see those cats who trusted me for three months look at me. Now we're... Oh, the woman who did the cemetery worker from Five Stupid Questions, a QS, she's coming up. We're flying her. She can take the kitten. Oh, okay. Sheba, I'm calling her.

We're flying her up. She's grabbing the kitten and then flying, flying back to Alabama. Oh, nice. Yeah. Yeah. It's pretty fucking cool, man. That she had. They don't have any cats in Alabama, I guess. Got to get the special Q cat.

Q cat. Yeah. I mean, that comes with a certain pedigree. Well, I mean, I'm paying for the flight and all that stuff, so it doesn't cause them. I imagine. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. It's like, you know, it's not, they can get a cat for free there, but they can get a paying for the flight and all that stuff, so it doesn't cost that much. I imagine. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's like, you know, they can get a cat for free there, but they can get a cat for free here. Yeah. It's true. It's free regard.

They got a trip out of it. They got a trip to New York out of it. I got the hobnob. Are you just meeting her at the airport and dropping the cat off? No, no. They're staying overnight on Staten Island, so from here, I'm going to the vet and then bring the vet over to the hotel. Okay.

Not the vet, the cat over to the hotel. I'm excited. I'm glad this cat was a solo kitten, Walt. So she was out there without playmates. You said it was Boris's niece. Yes. So what is this lineage then? Well Boris's half sister is the mother of this cat. Yeah. Where was she?

She lived in my yard. She lived in my yard for years. She's like four years, three or four years old at this point. Is it uncommon for a cat to have only one kitten? I don't know whether it was common. I haven't seen it yet. Usually I see two or three, but this little sheep was a little lonely kitten. Not the best mother in the world, if I'm going to be honest, as much as I love her

mother, so she would leave her unattended too a lot. I would go out there and give her water and stuff like that. I get psychotically wounded when I catch these animals because the look of fear in their eyes as they look at me, even though I know they're getting that princess life from here on out, I just feel like, oh, I just rocked this fucking cat's universe. And I really- They got a flight thing going on. It sucks me off, dude. And like for the rest of the day, I'm like the big Lebowski in front of my fireplace.

Strong men also cry. Thirty seconds of terror for a lifetime of pampered privilege. Yeah, it's like four days of terror. Oh, four days. Well, because then she goes in the vet and she doesn't even never been inside before. The dogs are barking and then now a plane fucking trip to Alabama. But once she settles- But she'll be eating caviar, right? She's in first class for sure. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

She is. Is she? Yeah, she is. I really wanted this because I like the person that's taking it too. Yeah. She was really nice and stuff like that. So I'm excited, I'm excited.

That's cool. Yeah. So yeah, I gotta get out of here when I can. Who told you? I hear things, I can't give you my sources. Geez Louise. I like having little tabs on you guys. People tell me stuff.

Yeah, good day. A little kitten. And a mom's pregnant again, so it's going to start all over again. Can't catch the mom to get her neutered or spayed rather? every time I've caught her so far, she's already been pregnant. So it's like, you want to abort these kittens? And I'm like, fuck no, get that, get the cat back. So they do abort kittens. I, I, yeah, I hate it.

What are you going to do? It's a very pro life stance from Vicky. I love that. We're going to get fucking. No. Oh, well, yeah, maybe. There might be some people. There's some hardcore. It made me feel better. You could scrape out all the humans you want.

And I don't really care, but you come to me with a kitten and I'm like, no, not on my watch. Father Lance just upped his Patreon subscript tier after he heard that Father Lance just upped his patriots tier after he heard that. Your anti-abortion. Is that the hundred dollar tier right now? Isn't there more I can give? We got to create an extra tier.

Pro cat life tier. Yeah. Oh boy. There's so much going on this week. Cute. There was the Ozzie funeral procession. Did you see it? I didn't see nothing on it. Oh boy. There were a lot of people.

It was like the queen died. Wow. Good. They had like a little marching band playing black Sabbath songs ahead of the hearse and then there was a hearse in like fucking 10 cars behind it. And people just- Was he in a glass coffin or something cool like that? No, he did have a coffin that said Ozzy on the side though in purple.

And the people lining the streets, dude, thousands and thousands and thousands of people, uh, Birmingham. Yeah. Wow. So he had a good send off. Was it like a star studded event attended by all the big metal names? All I saw in the little piece that I saw was Sharon and the kids. Otherwise, yeah, they didn't really.

The things I saw was just a procession and then Sharon and the kids at the funeral looking pretty upset. You think they'll give you a procession in New Jersey when you go? Huh. I'm thinking probably- Atlantic Highlands at least? In Highlands? I'm going to go out to the airport Plaza Park a lot. There you go.

Just a quick, one circle. Get them at Walt, the head of the hearse. We go to the KFC drive-through. We don't even need it all. I'll just throw you in the back seat of the Crown Vic. We'll just sit you up and like, we're going to the KFC drive-through. We'll just sit you up and like, we're going to the KFC drive-through. We'll just sit you up and like, we're going to the KFC drive-through.

We'll just sit you up and like, we're going to the KFC drive-through. We'll just sit you up and like, we're going to the KFC drive-through. We'll just sit you up and like, we're going to the KFC drive-through. We'll just sit you up and like, we're going to the KFC drive-through. We'll just sit you up and like, we're going to the KFC drive through. We don't even need, I'll just throw you in the back seat of the Crown Vic. We'll just sit you up and drive around in circles. Like a string on my hand so it looks like I'm waving. His eyes don't look too good. Yeah, I think the right one's rotted out already. How long has this been? Yeah, so goodbye Ozzy. Bye Ozzy. Goodbye. Bye.

Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye.

Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. I think the right one's rotted out already. How long has this been? Yeah, so goodbye Ozzy. Goodbye Ozzy. Goodbye Ozzy.

Went to the Monmouth County Fairwall. Oh boy, it was a torture test with the heat this week. Well the first night we went on, what was it? It would have been Friday evening. We were like, all right, it'll be a little bit cooler at night,? It would have been Friday evening. We were like, all right, it'll be a little bit cooler at night, so we'll go a Friday evening. We get there, we're walking up to buy the tickets and then there are people turning

around and walking back towards us. I know, like, yeah, they're closed. Because of the heat? Because of potential storms, because it rained that night. So I guess they're like, anytime there's a storm within 20 miles or three hours, they have to close down the fair. I wonder why. I bet you something must have happened at another fair.

At some point, yeah. Lightning and stuff. So we went back the next day. We took off. We went back the next day and it was just as brutally hot. Where did you take off from? We took off from the fair. We like left the fair.

Oh, okay. Yeah, sorry. Took off like where did you take off from? Both of you. I'm dying to know what you took off from the fair. We like left. Oh, okay. Yeah, sorry. Took off like, where did you take off from? Both of you, I'm dying to know what you took off from. I had some drugs in the car. I fucking blasted off. The rocket took off. Blasted off as those guys waited in the back seat.

Okay, so you went on Saturday. So we left and we went Saturday. Night? And, no, we went during the day. Oh boy, a smart move. no, we went during the day. Oh boy. Yeah, we went during the day. 95 degrees, looking for any patch of shade. The good thing is there weren't a lot of people there.

So like she didn't have to wait long for the rides or anything. The bad part was, yeah, you were waiting in the brutal sun. My fucking pool was 96 degrees. Wow. Just from the heat? Just from the sun? Yeah. I actually drained water out and put cold water in from the hose, brought it down to

like a chilly 91. It was crazy. I was like, it's like a stew. It was so fucking hot. Yeah. It was warm out there. Yeah. It's going to be like that a few more days too, right?

No, I think it's today. I think today is it. It's supposed to be bad storms today. Really? Motherfucker, I just watched the Crown Vic. I was outside scrubbing it. I showed it off in the driveway, like it was the 80s. Nice.

Yeah, it was nice. Did you guys watch the pig races? We didn't see any pig races. In fact, yeah, we didn't see any kind of- Turtle races? We didn't see any turtle races, nothing like that. They might've been later on in the day. When did you let us go to the fair?

Richmond County Fair. They paint the numbers on the back of the shell on you. Oh, let them race? Yeah. A fucking race to Salmonella, fucking poisoning. Well, we don't handle it. One, we don't handle them at all. Someone's got to handle them. We don't handle them with our mouths. Well, you don't kiss the winner as you press the button. I do, I do, I do, yeah.

There was one ride though, it was the Alpine Slides, it goes around in the circle. It must be an old ride because the images are all of snow and mountains and stuff like that, but it's all hot chicks. It's all like blondes with cut stomachs and the ski suit like buttoned down to their cleavage. Someone over there knows what they're doing. Somebody knows. Or somebody's like, I'm not paying for a new one. I'll take the complaints.

Not investing any money in updating the old Alpine slides. This ride is woke now. Did you get any kernel corn? We got- Funnel cake? Got some funnel cake. Got three slices of pizza and three sodas. It was $51.

Holy shit. I couldn't believe it. I was like, I'm sorry, what? I literally had to do a double take, 51. 51 bucks for three slices and three sodas. I went last year and they had a Chick-fil-A truck. That would have been dreamy. I'm like, well, the lines for everything else were rather long.

I know I like Chick-fil-A, it's a safe bet, but the prices for Chick-fil-A at the fair didn't reflect what they would be at the regular joints because it was like $20 for six nuggets. Right. That's bullshit, man. Yeah, I guess they must charge them a lot for that space that they rent out. That sucks. Yeah.

Oh, speaking of sexy women, I need to figure out, this will be a good test to find out whether Q is a Nazi. Oh. All right. Or if you can just appreciate a fine lady in some jeans. I could already answer a few before you even throw that. You talking about Sidney Sweeney? Talking about the Sidney Sweeney debacle.

These people can't stop fucking putting their own gun in their mouth and pulling the trigger. They can't stop. I saw the headline and I was like, Jesus Christ, they're still trying this? The finger wagging is still like, they're still over this? Yeah. And I think people are like, wag your finger the other way because I don't give a fuck. We're finally there where people are like, I don't care. I don't even know what you're talking about.

Oh, you're not aware of this? Swayze and- Sidney Sweeney, hot actress. That's her, Saving America. I thought she was one of America's greatest hopes before this happened. Well known for her luscious boobs. She doesn't make any bones about it. She's fucking making money.

She's the one that sold bathwater soap. Oh, okay. I thought that was going to be. Yeah. And also extremely talented. Must be said, good actress. Okay. So what's the issue?

The issue is that this, while looking like a sexy woman selling some jeans is actually Nazi propaganda. How so? Because you're still looking at a beautiful white woman with blonde hair Actually, Nazi propaganda. Because you're looking at a beautiful white woman with blonde hair saying that she has great genes. Oh, you know what? Yeah, that's problem. Yeah.

Why is that? Because you can put anybody else in it. She does have good genes though. Why are we arguing what's obvious? That was one of the Nazi talking points over the purges. It was also one of the American talking points in the beginning of the 20th century. I mean, it's just also a dude with boner talking points. It's got nothing to do with anything.

Okay. You know what? That ad copy, if it was anything not like that. I mean, if the jeans, if it was white denim, even then I'd be like, I don't know guys, this is- No, I could see it. I could see someone getting, that's really, it's really poor taste. It's not the model, it's not her fault, but it's the American Eagle PR company or the ad company.

Well, their stock went up about 20%. So I don't know that it is a bad move. Yeah, it seems like, because American Eagle was not a brand that everyone was like, Hey, American Eagle. Right. It's like, and now it's kind of come back. I saw it and I was like, I can't believe they're still doing this. Like they're fucking still doing the connection to the, with the, with the

slow, slow. You could force a connection through anything. No, I don't. I gotta be honest. I don't, I don't care. I'm like, I don't get it. First, Brian told me, but through anything. No, I don't. I got to be honest. I don't care. I didn't get it at first. Brian told me, but then it was like, holy shit. This is a woke.

Yeah, but it doesn't mean anything. It means that she's a fantastic looking woman. She's got great genes. Yeah. Yeah, but I can see. No, if you did it with- That's it, man. It's in poor taste though. The phrasing of the slogan. Would it be in poor taste if it wasn't a beautiful white girl? Like say it was Lizzo. Probably not.

Why not? When you know she doesn't have great genes. Who? Lizzo. Well, how do we know this one does? Are your eyes open? Yeah. Put your glasses on.

Are you looking at it? You think her mom looks like that? You think her grandma looks like that? You think her great-grandmother looks like that? Presently, who knows? Probably not. I think that's a lot of fucking plastic surgery probably. No fucking way. That's homegrown American talent.

It's probably a lot of fucking- There's her mom. Hours under the knife. Mine's beautiful. She's her mom. Hours under the knife. The one's beautiful. She's like 22. She's like 22. A lot of liposuction and filter and camera filters. Zero. And probably fake tits too.

No, now you're, that's heresy now. Now you're fucking, now you're being offensive, sir. I'm gonna wag my finger at you. Yeah. You think they're real. Yeah. Would it make a difference if it were? Not at all.

Right? So, but- But she's never real, but to be also clear, I've never seen her show or anything like that. So all I get to see is the fantastic photos that people throw on the internet. It's not her fault though. I feel bad for her if she's taking a lot of unneeded flack for this. And if it causes her to not get some, some gigs, I feel horrible for her, but

it, this is American Eagle and they, and they have to pay the toll for poor judgment here. Well, there was something interesting. You know what? Well, you convinced me. Trump put out a statement on Twitter or X or what his truth social, whatever platform he's on. And he was basically like, fuck all you guys waving, wagging your fingers. Sidney Sweeney is an American treasure.

Why? It was fucking great. Because she's pretty? It was fucking great. Why? Just to see that. I'm like, I wonder if Sidney Sweeney's like, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, exactly. She's like, guys. No.

The face of her on her face when she saw that on social media that the president said that. Yeah. That's not a great endorsement. Absolutely. Who knows what a politics are? Maybe she's like, great. Yeah, but you know she's going to pay a price for this. I don't think she is.

Somewhere in the world. I think it's so ridiculous that people are like, I think everybody's rolling their eyes at finger wagon these days anyway. And I think that I'm surprised that they even fucking took this swing at her. Cause I was like, guys, you seem so everything going on in the world and you guys are still fucking trying this shit. You got to hear it. You got to hear his tweet.

Many Democrats and democratic supporters have been criticizing the American Eagle Company, which is one of the great patriotic names for a company, for its latest ad campaign to sell blue jeans starring the beautiful and talented Sydney Sweeney. These online crybabies are calling the company and Sydney fascists. Totally ridiculous. Selling blue jeans is about as American as it can get, if we're being totally honest. Maybe if these fat ugly losers spent more time working on themselves, they wouldn't be so angry about everything. Maga.

If he had ended it. You see how fat he is? How does he have the balls to be like, you're fat? How does he call anybody fat? It's so fucking funny. I didn't hear it call American treasure though. No, no, no, but the great and talented American, or uh, Sydney Sweeney. Oh my God. Well, hopefully it won't.

Fat ugly losers? Yeah. Well, hopefully it won't stain her and really cause her career to, you know, crater. Right. Because it's not her fault. Well, if she stopped getting work, I mean, I'm sure she'd go on OnlyFans and make a billion times more than she's making.

I think Sidney Sweeney's gonna be okay. Yeah, I think she'll do all right. Did you see Fantastic Four? I did. I did. You loved it. I, did you see it, Bryce? I did not go see it, no, sorry.

10 out of 10, a love letter to Jack Kirby. Wow. I was absolutely- 10 out of 10 is flawless. Absolutely moved. A movie where Johnny Storm figured out an alien language on his own in two days. You're given a flawless 10 out of 10. I found nothing that I can be upset about. I know I'm like the boy who cried wolf because last week I said I was going to love everything, but I legitimately love this.

Sometimes even I can't tell when you're fucking. I loved it. Really? I loved it. I liked it. I'm surprised it's 10 out of 10. Not that you liked it because I did like it. I couldn't find anything I didn't like about it like the tone was absolutely perfect like so grim you didn't think that I don't want to spoil it. And hopeful at the same time. I'm telling you I'm a fan of the movie I'm just like you didn't think that like

Galactus got defeated a little too easily. Wouldn't you have liked to see Galactus? Maybe destroy another planet before you got I don't know something. I got to I don't know something. No, I know. But yeah, I think you know, I don't know. But for the purpose of this movie. No, I mean, they were like, step here. It was everything. We got them guys. And you know, like, no, what's he didn't have the fucking ultimate nullifier, the nullifier like you didn't. I don't think you could do the ultimate nullifier and pull it off. I know why not. It's a different universe. You tie it into the the infinity gems of that universe or something. You could pull it off. Look, I liked it. I'm shocked. I didn't like it as much as Superman. Um, I don't know that I liked it as much as Superman, but I love Superman.

Just seeing Superman is enough for me to get like- I am like as much as you were stunned by my lukewarm reception to Superman. I am stunned by your kind of lukewarm- It's not lukewarm. I liked the movie a lot. It's tepid. It's not that tepid. I liked it.

I actually went to see it like after it ended. I went to go sit in it. So twice I saw like two one and a half like one and because I want because I wanted to hear the music like the music so awesome. So I was like I want to see it again and just pay attention to the music. And I was like the music was fucking awesome. Yeah, it was great. No, I really loved the movie. The art design is absolutely deserving of multiple Oscars. And when fucking they took out Herbie's like household tape and put in the space tape, I was like, what a great fucking detail. I was like, what a great detail.

Some of my favorite moments though, like I almost like stood up in my chair and fucking screamed at the top of my lungs like I saw a helicopter. It was when they're in the spaceship and they're trying to get away from the surfer and Sue Storm goes, kill her, kill her. I was like, yes, hardly. And Johnny tries to kill her. I was like, fucking awesome.

Yeah, because it was just everything like what a mother would do to defend her child. It was perfectly the tone. I love the coming together of the world is like we have to work together. Never has the, in history has every nation come together to form an allegiance to. The fact that they pulled that off was the only unrealistic thing. Everybody's got on board with this. Yeah. It was stunning at time. I wish it could have been five hours long or at least four hours long. Cause it would have been nice. Fantastic four was four hours long. I thought. Yeah. But like all this stuff- How long was it about to?

Yeah, I think it was barely like a little over two. It was about two. It was like an hour and- I heard they cut a whole bunch out though. They cut a gigantic red ghost battle. Okay. With the sprains. You like the take on the mole man, huh? I did. When I was watching it, I was thinking you wouldn't like it. It was fine.

They didn't even have any mole-oids. They didn't show any, I was like, why would they not do that? But I felt he could have been a little bit more homely. Okay. That would have been nice because the whole mole man was such a strange looking person, but, um, I could live with it. There was, I didn't really like the beard either on the thing, but again, small, little, small little thing could not, uh, damper my enthusiasm for how, how many things that they hit perfectly. How many times they hit home runs with, uh, read the Pedro Pascal.

He looked good. The stretching looked good, man. When they did it, I was like, wow, they pulled it off. Cause that's a big concern. And his, his infuriating monotone, um, cold clinical outlook on everything. Like you could see how people would be frustrated with someone who has that much of an intelligence and, but but also has no emotions

behind it. I thought it was great. I thought it was a little weird that the first thing they admitted when they got off the plane was just like, he wants our baby and we can save you all. I was like, I would have kept that info on the side pocket for a little bit. Well, they're heroes, man. They don't lie. No, but you know, they don't have to tell either. Yeah, yeah. But I thought it was, I liked it. I liked it. I liked it a lot. I like people who were mad at me about my take on Lois Lane. I mean, that's how you do a strong female character so much. She was stronger than all three of the members and

it was fucking perfectly handled. Whereas she is fucking dope the way she went after Galactus. She was awesome in the movie. No, she was great. She did. I thought the Silver Surfer was great too. How great did her skin look? I thought they nailed that skin, looked like real moving. What are you trying to make up for? Nothing. I really loved it.

No, no, the movie's good. You really loved it. They nailed so much about Galactus and it was such a trip to see him displayed that accurately on screen. But I did think he got dispatched a little too easily. I think it's fucking Galactus, man. But they only got him to go into, they only moved him. I know I'm giving away to everybody, but if they only got him in to go and they only moved him I know I'm giving away to everybody but I want to know but they only moved him like a foot to fall into a

So he's coming back He didn't really defeat him. They it took it took you but you just saw that one like to me It's just like you you know, he destroyed the planet Right and I and I thought that the ship they used for him wasn't as cool as the ship in the comics. I was like, why don't they fucking do that? What is it called? The Norris 2 or the... Something like that.

Something 2, yeah. But the fucking... I think he's coming back, hopefully in a big bad way in the next ones. Like he's probably going to be the ultimate Thanos then. But I mean, it's hard to talk about what I want to remember, but like, so you think that when they shot him into that thing, he went into another universe? Yeah, yeah. Or he just went to a, because they said they were just transporting him to parts unmarked. Far out into space.

I think he's coming back. It would be a crime if they don't. But there's already a, there's probably already a Galactic in the main universe already though. Oh yeah, that's right. Because they have Celestials because they showed the Celestials already in Eternals. It would be strange though to follow up on Galactus movie with another Galactus movie, right? That's what I'm saying.

We might not see him. That's what I'm saying. I'm like, show him destroying one more planet instead of just, you know, I don't know, but he looked awesome and it was fucking great. I just loved the tone of it though, that 60s art deco. The whole thing. I mean, I don't know why they took out Alicia Masters and didn't have Ben fall in love with Alicia, but it's a small thing.

I don't know why. I don't know why they had any sort of romance thing in the movie at all that didn't pay off. Like it just like she was there one scene and then she wasn't there again. I'm like, what's the point? And why get rid of Alicia Masters? Right. She's blind. Why not make her Alicia then? I don't get that. Those are things that unless he finds Alicia in our world or the MCU, Right. Who knows? Who knows? Yeah. But I loved it. And that sucks that it comes on the heels of me saying I was going to love everything. People might not believe me, but- Well, I believe you.

Yeah. That's all that matters. So anybody listening, I get caught in Walt's rope-a-dopes as well. So you're not alone out there, but I do believe him on this one. It's not like Ghostbusters 2016. I'm I get caught in Walt's rope adopes as well. You're not alone out there, but I do believe him on this one It's not like Ghostbusters 2016 I know this motherfucker doesn't mean what he's saying I can't what's the next Marvel movie then this is spider-man. I think so Yeah, it's gonna be tough for me now to come off of that Cosmic space and to come on a street level hero though. It's Spider-Man.

I know, but we've seen a bunch of Spider-Man movies. I wish we could see another Fantastic Four movie immediately. Yeah. Well, they're going to be in the Avengers movies too, so you'll see them, I guess. I read that Pedro Pascal is now the face of MCU basically. He killed it. Did he? He killed it.

He was great. He's so annoying in real life, I can't take him. I don't really follow that stuff, so He was great. He's so annoying in real life. I can't take him. Is he? I don't really follow that stuff, so I don't know what he is like in real life. As far as I'm concerned, just like the guy who played Dante is Dante. I don't even remember his real name. Oh, Brian O'Halloran.

You're not a real person. He's the guy you've known for decades. After 30 years. Just as Brian O'Halloran is Dante to me, I always will be Pedro is Reed Richards. He's just Reed Richards now? Reed Richards. Wow, he's that good, huh? Even had the white hair, which I love, so I was like, oh, yeah, that's cool.

He did a good job. He did a good job. I felt the parallels. When I deal on a daily basis with a very frustrating genius, so when I see – I can see how you have to deal with that kind of knowledge and that calculations are always right on spot on, it can get frustrating. Yeah, you feel small. Yeah.

And who are you in this situation? You're just a regular guy? Oh, you're not even part of the Fantastic Four? No, that's what I feel like. Right, right, yeah. That's what I mean. Yeah, the Johnny Storm language thing didn't bother you at all language thing didn't bother me at all. It didn't bother me at all.

I was like, really? Rick can just have a program that does this in 10 seconds. Uh, yeah, but then I just liked that Johnny was motivated. Instead of just being like, uh, what role does he fill in other than being a hothead? I mean, I thought it was going to be trying to fuck the Silver Surfer. He was trying. I know. I was like, that's the story. I was like, going to be trying to fuck the Silver Surfer. He was trying. I know. I was like, that's the story. I'm like, get him to try to fuck the Silver Surfer. That's what I want to see. But no, I would have preferred Norrin Radd. It's a bummer that he's not in his own movie.

I think it worked better with her. I don't think it worked better with her, but I thought the skin effects looked cool. But then you wouldn't have Johnny trying to really be motivated to find out the language. If it's a dude, he doesn't care. But if it's a girl, he's like, Oh, I want to get with her. So let me find out how she's her language. I don't think his motivation should have been something that Reed could figure out in 10 seconds on his own. He's too busy trying to figure a way to stop. He built a new spacesuit in between scenes. doesn't have a fucking grow another brain and work on the thing a little things like that, but I but I did enjoy it

And again the music I came and then I got home. I listened to the soundtrack I say oh it just sounds so fucking cool like an iconic and instantly iconic What is your favorite era of Fantastic Four comics for you? Like what's your error where you look at and you're like, this is my favorite point. It's probably going to be when Sue had that costume that everybody hates. With the fucking triangle with the tits? Yeah, that one. That's my favorite one. Where it was like a-

She's wearing lingerie That's my suit storm Bring it on the marble not me Her legs are bare her arms are bare everything's there it's a baby sweetie She's got great jeans now I guess No, I guess, man, you know, the 80s, like the whole Power Pack era and stuff like that. I, you know, I know that that's not Fantastic Four, but that that kind of era, the. So who was the, do you know who the creative team was?

I never really like was the biggest Fantastic Four. Did they dive into the FF? No, I read them. I read them monthly, but I like when Dr. Doom stole the kid and stuff like that, like I know storylines, but I wouldn't say there's like a version of the Fantastic Four that I love more than any other one because they were just never really my, they're like X-Men like I'm aware. You know what I mean? Like I never really got into X-Men. Same thing with Fantastic Four a bunch, but I read it at the same time. So I don't know what I'm aware, you know what I mean? Like I never really got into X-Men, same thing with Fantastic Four, a bunch.

But I read it at the same time, so I don't know what I'm saying right now. I just buy shit and read it mindlessly. But if you're asking me what my favorite Fantastic Four costume is, it's definitely that one. Wow. Yeah, you're not going to find many who point to that error. Maybe not that admitted. That's a woman claiming her own sexuality. I love that.

Yeah, but that's like Mrs. Brady putting on a thong and praying around fucking the house. All right. How great it is. Go on. It's not right. It's not right that Sue Storm should be sexualized like that. Really? Sue Richards. It's her choice. She's a be sexualized like that. Really? Sue Richards. It's her choice. She's a mom.

You shouldn't. That was a bad, that was a dark era for mom. I just want everybody to be looking it up. You can't sexualize a mom, can you? But it's not right. She was like the wholesome mom. I mean, wasn't she like the ditzy, like in the 60s and stuff? She was like, Reed, what are we doing now? That's kind of in line for how chicks were in the sixties and how they were.

Broads and games. They looked at her husbands for guidance. You remember how much the world sucked in the sixties? No. Oh, you don't? Oh, hmm. One of the things I watch on TV looks awesome. Laughing. Yeah.

But what do I know? I was watching it a decade after it happened. Yeah. Goldie Hawn did look good. Oh, yeah. Who was the other one? Who was the goofy one? Who was the goofy one? There was Goldie Holm, but there was like a goofy looking lady.

Ruth Buzzy? Ruth Buzzy, yeah. She just died not too long ago. Yeah. Well, she was memorable, but they didn't make her dance in a bikini with all tattoos. Oh yeah, and flowers painted on her and stuff. They just put her in a hair nut and made her bop. Made her act bold.

Where's my bikini? Well, we have a different idea for you. Let's see. What else do I got here? Oh, no, I never was. Did you look up the Sue Storm thing? No, no, no. Get him below the screen. I do want Brian's fucking.

My take on this. Yeah. I was surprised. Sexy Sue Storm action. This is when she was a mom, you said, Walt. Oh, definitely. She's a multi. She's, she's has a daughter at this point too.

Yeah. Valeria. Yeah. She's a, it's a shocking that they made the choice. Yeah. It's ridiculous. Well, you're with this have been. 94. Yeah, that's it. but there's better shots of it.

Yeah, well, there's more egregious cheese cake shots. Yeah, that's kind of a tame shot. Oh, look at those thigh highs. See where the cleavage is, where you see the four is missing. Yes. There it is. Look at that. That's poor.

Wow. In front of her son. Yeah. And it definitely, and when you see a back shot of it, it's like creeping up or crack. Really? Yeah. How long did they keep this design for? Not very long.

No. It was not universally beloved. So they didn't use it in the movie? No. I mean, it would be fucking something if they did. It sure would. Yeah. I mean.

That's something else, man. Like I said, it's like, what was the mom's name in Brady Bunch? It'd be like Carol Brady parading around in a thong and her tits pressed together in front of the kids. Oh, people hate that costume. It's consistently listed as one of the worst costumes of all time. Who designed it? Anybody know? I think it's Paul Ryan as the artist.

Paul Ryan. Yeah. I'm not sure who the writer is in that era though. It may even be Engelhardt or Tom DeFalco. Tom DeFalco, sure. Oh yeah, you know. That's who it was? I know Tom DeFalco. No, no, no. I know Tom DeFalco. I didn't know the other. DC Comics Bomb Shows. Yeah. DC. Or Marvel rather. I didn't mind the Future Foundation stuff.

Yeah, it says DC there though. It does. You didn't like what? I didn't mind the Future Foundation stuff that they did, like when they had all the kids living in the Baxter building with them and they had the white costumes and spider-man was a member for a while. Oh Yeah, yeah, that was a good run. Yeah, that was a good run. I like that one. That was many years That was like almost 15 years later than this though. Oh, yeah for sure Wow, anyway, sorry. I just want to Brian to get on that's okay. Yeah, I like it I might be one of the few people who does.

Uh, naked gun. Yeah. You seem to be like you were in the, that age bracket of naked gun. Yeah, I wasn't. It's like an airplane movie, right? It is. I saw it once and I barely remember. I don't know how, man.

That first naked gun is one of the funniest things. I got to rewatch. Oh yeah. Are you saying? Absolutely, dude. The second one is great, less. And the third one, I remember being where you were like, oh, it's still funny, but like, we're starting to see the same jokes over and over again, but I got that first naked gun is so fucking good.

You naked gun fan well? I don't really remember it that well. I saw them. I don't remember them that well either, but we grew up with airplanes, so I can appreciate that absurdist comedy. I grew up with the TV show. I remember watching it. Police Squad. Police Squad was on TV for a short. That is an unbelievable trajectory though. That's crazy, right?

For a TV show that could not fucking last more than eight episodes and then they're like, okay, we'll make a major motion picture. That is bonkers at a studio back then. It was the right move. It was definitely the right move, dude. That is some fucking long shot odds. Yeah. That's when they could do shit like that back then.

But fuck man, I have a mixed about this new one because I heard it's really good, but like I've become friends with David Zucker. And they cut him out of it. So he's not involved in it. So like, even if it's good, there's a part of me that's just like, that's my boy, man. You know what I mean? Like how do you cut him out of his own creation? Wait a minute, what?

He has wanted to make a Naked Gun movie for years. He was involved with the original stuff? He wrote and directed all three of them. How did you become friends with him? How old is this guy now? He's in his probably late early 70s now. Really? How'd you meet him?

He's been on it in every one of the Joker's cruises. We did airplane screenings, naked gun screenings on the boat. I've been to his house, had done it with him. How did you come to be in his circle? I think he saw Impractical Jokers and wrote, said something publicly about how much he was like, love that show. And we reached out and we were like, holy shit, we sent him, oh no, no, no, that wasn't it. Oh, it's even better. We ran into him somewhere and sent and he was like, my son watches the show, my daughter watches the show, but I haven't watched it. We sent him the DVDs and he wrote us these, fuck, this nice email about how funny he thought

it was and really thoughtful stuff. We flew out to LA and had dinner with him and we've just kind of been friends with him for years. So you ran into him and you recognized him because he's not an actor, right? No, oh there he is. That's him on dinner party. You're going to love this gag that he's got coming up. You don't even need the volume. So yeah, we just... You recognized him as the guy from the... It was at a con or something like that. Yeah, for sure. And then we sent him and we printed out the emails. I have the email he wrote and he signed it for me and it's framed in

my office. Oh, nice. Yeah. But it's just a great guy. So how come he wasn't allowed to be a part of the new one? Is it just ageism? Hollywood is run by a bunch of fucking morons, I guess, but- It's ageism creeping in. Maybe. He's on the other side of 70.

But he wanted to do it and he tried for years. Here it is. That happens for the rest of the interview. It's just so great. He's like, tell the foods too cold and like get out of here and she's bringing a martinis and stuff. He's just the fucking funniest. And he, he, he said to me once, he's like, nothing you can say or do without will ever, ever insult me. And like, we just tried, we went after him with like, fuck a crazy shit. And he just, he doesn't care. He's the best.

Anyway, he wanted to make the movie for years and they just, they wouldn't let him do it. And then when they made it with these new guys, he wasn't involved. They cut him out completely. So it's like, come on guys. That's not cool. You know, the guy's a legend. He made an airplane. He made, he created Naked Gun.

Like how you guys cut him out? But I heard the movie is funny, so I'm towing My question about it was because Liam Neeson's in it. Yeah, Pamela Anderson's in it. Yeah, and now they're an item nice Do you have to measure up? If you're gonna be with Pamela Anderson, you got Tommy Lee Now you got Liam Neeson. These guys are well known for having giant hogs. How old is Pamela Anderson now? She's got to be 60, I think. I can't imagine that that's an important aspect at this point any longer.

You think it's just- I think it's- 58 years old. She's looking for- Someone who's not a lunatic. Yeah, she's looking for someone with a big heart, not a big hog. But isn't he famously have a giant hog? Yeah, that's what I mean. Oh, so you're saying like the next person.

Maybe there won't be a next person. Well, he's 73, she's 58. Maybe she's less. She's 58. Yeah. That's a 15-year swing, I mean, at a certain point. He looks good for 73. He's a 15 year swing. I mean, certain point. He looks good for 73. He's fucking amazing.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. My point being that, yeah, she's known for going with guys with. Does it shrink as you get older though? Well, in doubt. Nice so far. Yeah.

I hope that's not. Now you get me nervous. I thought I heard that though. I think it's because people put on weight and like the fat comes out and takes over. That I can attest to. Because if you squeeze that patch down, you got another two inches. Yeah, yeah. It's important when you're measuring it for statistics sake.

But it's like, you know, you lose height, I heard, as you grow older. So I thought that meant you'd also lose some of your. Some wiener length. Some length and girth. I hope not. All you want would be, at that point, would it matter? Yeah. At 70?

Always. I want the fucking. You don't think it's going to matter at 70? You don't think it's going to matter in 13 years? That seems soon. No, I'm talking about like the, it's going to be minimal. It's like, it's all, it's not like it's. Oh, I'm talking about like it's going to be minimal. It's like it's not like it's… Oh, you're talking about the size. Yeah.

Okay. I thought you're talking about in general, not caring about it at 70. No, I'm just saying like these changes. Yeah. Our changes are coming along. They're almost not visible by the naked eye. You'd have to have side-by-side pictures, I think, to be like, oh yeah, wow, it was a little bit bigger back then. I guess. Yeah. So I wouldn't spend too much time fretting about it. I never even thought about it until you brought it up now. Hopefully you don't now.

That's all he's going to think about. Yeah. Doesn't care about cats anymore. Obsessing. Oh boy. Yeah. I remember his wife died and he was destroyed. Didn't she crash into a tree or something? Was that her? It's something.

Was she with a skiing accident or something? It is what? Natasha something, right? Natasha Richardson. I can't remember what happened to her. We shared an agent or something at the time and they were like, we don't know if he'll ever work again. He was apparently so in love with her and so happy with her when she went. He was, I mean, as I guess anybody who loses their wives, you know, you would think would

be- A beginner ski lesson. Yeah, something like that. At first, she refused any medical help with but the complaint of a severe headache about two hours after the accident. If you hit your head, go to the fucking doctor immediately. Go to the ER immediately. My grandfather did the same thing.

My mother's father, he was on a ladder. He was 58 years old. He fell off and hit his head. Didn't go to the doctor. Didn't go to the hospital. Next day, dead. Oh, God, man. You know? Oh, God, it could all be over in any second.

Fall off a ladder, yeah. Bump your head? You don't know. Isn't that what happened to Bob, what's his name too? The dude from Funny Some Videos. The dude from Funny Some Videos, Bob. Bob Saget? Bob Saget, yeah. Where he fell in a tub. I was just thinking Seagull. Bob Saget, Bob Saget, yeah, I can't remember. Or he fell in a tub or something? I was thinking Seagull. Bob Saget, yeah, he fell in his room

and hit his head or something, like after a show. Yeah. Oh my God. Didn't Sonny Bono die to that? He smashed into a tree skiing, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Oh my God, man.

Yeah, Saget had blunt head trauma from an accidental blow to the back of the head, most likely from a fall, and had subsequently died from the resulting injuries. He was also infected with COVID-19 at the time. I never heard that. People loved him. I never got to meet him, but everybody I know that know him.

He was the greatest dude. That's what I've heard about him. He's a really nice guy, really funny guy outside of... He's like comedians worshiped him. Yeah, his career wasn't what he wanted it to be, even though it was pretty big fucking career. Two major shows from full house. No.

Oh, the way you said it, like I've met everybody in full. No, I just wanted to say that I heard he was a good guy, but I didn't want to claim credit that I knew. Oh, okay. Yeah. It's the way you were dropped out. I was like, like you had met the whole cast. No, I just, I just heard he was a nice guy, but I don't want to make it seem like I knew him.

Well, what else we got here? Let's see. I don't know. Wow, this is all stuff. Oh, that man that got sucked into MRI machine. I further heard that it wasn't that he wasn't told. It's that he burst into a room that he shouldn't have been going into. Burst in? What do you mean burst? Yeah, he went into a room where his MRI was going on. No, his wife was again in MRI and her wife called him in and said, can you help me out? Oh man.

And he walked in and- With his big chain on. That sucks. Yeah, that sucks. Helping his wife out and shit and he dies. I'm surprised the chain wouldn't just be ripped off. How fucking secure is that clasp? 20 pound chain, that bitch is pretty thick.

I'm surprised it didn't decapitate the guy. After he pulls him in and then it's pulling on the next chain. That's why I only buy $5 chains. You don't need to get pulled into a fucking MRI machine, man. No, my chain's going a snap before I go in. It's like a little ball chain. Yeah, there's no way. Yeah, that's like for dog tags.

Yeah, same with Git-Em. You guys are playing it smart. He told me to do that. He said, don't buy a quality chain. He goes, buy a ball chain. Buy the cheapest one you can find. It was a chalkboard with all sorts of equations written on it and shit. And at the end was this cheap ball chain.

It was safe. Teabag and poop cruise, all the stuff we already, I mean, I've evergreen shit from forever ago, but nothing really happened to me this week. Well, how long have we been going? 47 minutes. We got to keep going. We got to crack on a little bit. Yeah, I know, I know.

We got to crack on an hour. Yeah. Let me scramble. Let me think about it. Oh, Will Smith. I have that down. Have you seen Will Smith embarrassing himself lately? What has he done?

No, unless I've heard from him. He smacked Chris Rock. Smacked Chris Rock and then went on to, now he's trying to reignite his rap career. Ooh, how old is he? He's, I think he's about as old as me. I think he's like 57 or maybe 56, somewhere in there. But I mean, if you see how he's doing it, it's pretty sad. How's he doing it?

Like he was down in the UK and he was doing this, his rap song where he's like, I like pretty girls, which is like maybe 40 years ago. He could have been rapping about that, but like an old guy- I'm not saying pretty girls. He's not saying that, but like an old guy rapping about like- I'm not saying pretty girls. He's not saying like, I like hot bitches. It's corny though. It's corny.

It is corny, but I mean, rap's been a lot more fucking disrespectful to women who don't like pretty girls. As I was saying- Who doesn't like pretty girls? Exactly. Why? Right. The rap world has changed dramatically since he ruled the sales charts, right, with Parents

Just Don't Understand. It has changed a lot. So it's hard to conquer it again. But if anybody can, I think it's him. You think so, huh? I'm predicting that he does not come back as a rapper. Why does he want to? I don't know, but he's just like, call it the bounce back, because I'm bouncing back.

I saw him doing this rap and he rhymed bounce back maybe four times. With bounce back? With bounce back, yeah. It's been a while. He's rusty. He's rusty, I know. What rhymes with rusty? But I mean, he's got to be rich beyond any needs of care.

Oh yeah. So he's like, I don't give a fuck. You don't like it, don't buy it. I'm happy. Then you're like Eddie Murphy though. Like remember, like his girl liked to party all the time. Like he was at the height. That's a great song. Oh, come on now.

That's a great song. Are you kidding me? You don't like that song? At the time. Rick James fucking produced that song. Did he? It sounds like a Rick James song. Yeah, it's awesome, dude.

Wow. But he was not like, people weren't like, okay, we respect like a Rick James song. Yeah, it's awesome, dude. Wow. But he was not like, people weren't like, okay, we respect Eddie Murphy for this song. It was a joke at the time. I don't remember that. I remember being a hit song. I'm curious. Why does that annoy you though? Not annoy you, but if it gets on your radar, how come you don't want to see Will Smith

come back and reclaim his throne? I don't mind Will Smith come back? Will Smith come back and reclaim his throne. I don't mind Will Smith coming back. I mind it in as much as the way he's doing it is just goofy. Maybe that's what rap needs now. We've gone from starting goofy. They will never accept goofy. We're not going back to goofy. It's not happening.

It's not for you to say what they're going to do. I'm not the one saying it. What do you mean they? It's not for you to say what they're going to do. I'm not the one saying it. What do you mean they? It's not for you to say what they're going to do. I'm not the one saying it. What do you mean they? It's not for you to say we're not going back. Why not?

Who is it to then? Why not me? Why is it for somebody else to say? Goofy with a fucking, with a Ghostbusters sign through it. No more. You want only hardcore rap for the rest of your days. Oh yeah. But what about like MC Hammers, like the Adams family rap? You don't love that? Like can't touch this. Can't touch this. You don't want to go back. I know one of the greatest songs ever. Fuck. But I'm

wax. Can't touch this. Okay. I'll give you that. And the moves, the moves were unbelievable. Flawless. Yeah. Flawless maneuvering. Then look at him. What'd he do? He became a preacher. Spent all his money. Spent all his money on horses. I will say I'm upset with him for not bringing back Jazzy DJ.

Oh, DJ Jazzy Jeff? So is DJ Jazzy Jeff. So is DJ Jazzy Jeff. I bet. That would be a shot heard around the rap world though, if both of them were like, we're both back. We're getting goofy again If he got on stage and opened with like nightmare on my street

Yeah, like that Freddy Krueger one he did like I would be like, holy shit. This is awesome Yeah, you could do it. Yeah, you could definitely bring the fun back to rap. Yeah No more shootings. No more fucking song bitches and hoes throw it all out. I mean, the Wu-Tang is doing a retirement tour. Are they? Yeah. It's how I went to the garden in some way. No more talking about killing people.

Mm-hmm. About your nines. No more talking about, you know, dragging hoes and stuff. Let's make it fun again. The way it used to be when you can't touch this or even like a wild thing is about as naughty as I want it to be with Tom Luke. Yeah. Funky Comedine is about date rape drug. Yeah, you can't go back to that.

Maybe leave that one out. He gets a pass because he was the fucking father of naughty fucking date rape. Of 80s date rape songs. The godfather of date rape. Look at this shit, man. Freddie Criss. Yeah, see, I was not a Fresh Prince guy. I didn't watch the show.

I didn't watch the show either. Okay, yeah. So I don't have any sort of love for it in that respect. I had something that popped up, I forgot to tell you about, when I was in the hospital last week. I came across somebody that we went to high school with. Oh yeah? Walked up to me, didn't recognize him at first.

Came over to me with his hand extended and while I'm in the hallway and I'm talking to him, we're checking in at the front desk. So I'm just sitting there and all of a sudden this guy extends his hand and I assumed it was maybe somebody from Complement or something that recognized me. So I was like, oh, hey man. I go, hi, how are you? And he goes, and then he says something. I was like, holy shit.

And then I knew who it was. And he said, do you, he told me what he's doing now, what he's up to, and where he's working and what a great job he has. He asked me if I was still in Red Bank working. I said, no, no, I don't work at the store anymore. He goes, so what do you do now? Again, faced with when I have to have a set- I'm on welfare.

I got to have a set- Oh, my welfare. I got to go. I'm the arena. I have that long, like, dopey pause. I'm not working at the moment. Trevor Burrus Oh, no. Matthew Feeney Yeah. I don't know why. Why do you think I'm so reluctant to just say what I'm up to? I just said, yeah, I'm just not doing it. He goes, so what do you do then? And I go, how much? I said, oh, yeah. I go, my wife

is sick. That's what I do. I think it's because it's- It's such a douchebag thing to say. Well, it's like, I'm a podcaster. It's like, well, how do you make money doing it? It demands further explanation. You can't just be like, I'm a podcaster. It's like, then you have to go into, you ever hear of Patreon?

No. Okay, well, now I got to tell you what fucking Patreon is. No, no one's going to question me. No one's going to dig any deeper. It's like, oh, so you can make money with that? No one's going to. They're just going to be like, oh, cool. What's the name of it?

And then I don't want them even listening to it though. The other day, my mom said something. We were going somewhere and we asked her to watch, I almost called them Chucky, Teddy. We watched Teddy and we said we were going and she's like, oh, are you going to talk about it in a podcast? She's never mentioned it before. I just visibly, just like my whole body clenched. I don't want anybody to know. You are a podcaster, aren't you, son? Still with your back turned.

It was like she caught me like... Like with the bathroom door open or something. I can explain. It shrinks as you get older. You know that. I don't know why, but it's such a major hang. I have to have a pat answer though. Should I just say I'm retired?

Yeah, why not? Just retired. Just retired, yeah. Okay. That's what I got. From? From working at a comic book store. Okay.

Yeah. All right. Yeah, that's the easiest because then you don't have to be like, well, I'm a carpenter. Oh, really? What have you been working on lately? It's like, oh, shit. Now I'm caught. Yeah. I don't know why, but it just gives me the heebie-jeebies to even talk about it. Yeah. Yeah. To people I haven't seen in 30 years and to my mom. My mother always says, good luck. If I'm like, okay, I'm going to go do the show or whatever,

she's like, good luck. She if I'm like, okay, I'm going to go do the show or whatever. She's like, good luck. She always wishes me luck for some reason. Do you think you need luck? Sometimes good luck making it to an hour. You don't do anything, son. Not yet. You fucking piece of shit. 56 minutes.

We're limping. No ads? No, no ads today. I'm going to take off. I'm going to do my podcast, mom. Take off from what? Well, Tom, you've been using this taken off expression lately. What do you got coming up, kid?

Got four more weeks, brother. Oh, really? That's it? Of working on the season and then- How long's your break then? Well, we don't have a deal for more seasons yet. So we have to contractually have six months between seasons. But I don't know.

I don't know. They've only just started the conversations because once again, fucking Discovery got split off by Warner Brothers and everybody got fired and there's fucking all new people to network that we've never met before and those are the people we're dealing with now. So it's just, I'm just like, just tell me when there's something I need to know. I'm staying out of it. Do you make an effort to be extra nice to those new people that come in?

Well, I make an effort to be nice to everybody. I don't mean it that way, but I mean do you go overboard where you send like... I don't even talk to them. The last two turnovers, I've only met two people from the network the entire time and I was nice to them because they were nice, but I have no idea... But you don't go out of your way to bend over. Well, they're all in LA. So it's like...

Like Walt used to, comic book man. People were like, he's on the show. The execs would come down, everybody would be like, hey Marco, how you doing buddy? You know, blah, blah, blah. And Walt's over in the corner like, he's talented, he doesn't have to fucking do anything. I don't wanna talk to him.

He's fucking talented. Yeah, that's all I keep, that mysterious allure. That mystique. You're on set, you're in your zone. They can't be coming over fucking bothering you while you're trying to work. Yeah, it's like I'm a fucking artist. He showed up. You're on set. You're in your zone. They can't be coming over fucking bothering you while you're trying to work. Yeah. It's like I'm fucking an artist.

Yeah. He showed up. That's how he was bothering you. He showed up on set. What should I do though? I'll watch. I'd be like Brian Johnson fucking like, you know, trying to make a million jokes in one second trying to impress the fucking.

Hey Marco, it's me, Brian Johnson. He's the one that I got into a fight with about the wire shirt and stuff. He was the guy that wouldn't let me wear my wire shirt. Yeah, I ran into, but I had with Marco a couple times. Who won the fight? We both did. He wouldn't let me wear it like regularly, but I was allowed to wear it when we went down to Baltimore since that's where the show takes place. So I thought that was a good concession. Yeah. Okay. Okay. Yeah. But we'll see. But ratings are fucking great. This is the best ratings

we've had in two seasons. So that's when the phone started ringing again, when the ratings started coming in, they were like, how the fuck is this show gaining in ratings after all these years? I'm like, I don't know the answer to anything anymore. We'll see. Anybody who's in the audience that has that Nielsen box, thank you. It's really fucking shocking. Mad Fientist The only complaints I ever see about the show on Reddit has nothing to do with you guys. It has to do with like, where's this episode? They take episodes down. Yeah. Nobody fucking knows. It's all on HBO Max now. Yeah. And even that, like we're in the top 10 shows on HBO Max. So it's like,

yeah. So they, but when it comes to negotiations, they're like, it doesn't fuck. I mean anything. Nobody cares about streaming numbers. And then the second negotiations are over. They're like, holy shit, you guys are in the top 10. That's amazing. But it's just, it's all just a fucking scam bullshit scam. I mean, yeah, if I end up not doing anymore, it's, it's gonna be because I just don't want to deal with this shit. Speaking of HBO max, I started watching on HBO max, uh, friends. They started watching friends. Getting, yeah.

Woof. He told me we were going to do it. What was that? Friends. You started watching Friends? From the beginning, yeah. Oof. You told me you were going to do it. What was that? What was that? Oof. I'm just saying. I really find it charming and it makes me long for like, I have all these friends now

and none of them are like the friends on the TV show though. None of them. You want friends like that? I want friends like that. Which one? Well, I want a Chandler. A Chand them. You want friends like that? I want friends like that. Which one? Well, I want a Chandler. A Chandler. I want a Ross.

Yeah. I don't have any Chandlers or Rosses in my life. You have a Reed Richards over there. There's nobody that acts like him on fucking friends. The one where they had to call the police. The one that ain't fucking rancid fucking slobby. I can't believe you don't like it. It was like one of the greatest historic shows in the 90s.

Dude, I don't like to, you know, I have that, I don't want to shit on anything that people enjoy really, but like I remember when it first started, I was working on a blockbuster video. Yeah. And the fucking amount of friends merchandise we had to deal with. I was like, I'm like, I'm looking at these six fucking morons all goddamn day. I couldn't take it. And like, and then anytime they would show the clips. Hey, you're talking to a guy who worked at J and Sallampops. Yeah, I know. You're retired, though.

They would show the clips on the TV in Blockbuster, and it would be like the same corny five jokes over and over again. And then I'd have to sell a friend's calendar, and I'd be like, get the fuck out of here. That was a different BQ, though. That was a BQ I'm glad I never met. I was so jaded and so fucking sour.

Oh, you met him. You knew him. You can't enjoy the... I don't want to say it's innocence, because it's still kind of a little body of an innocent French joke of the 90s where it's not so, it's not heavy at all. It's just like eating a gummy bear. I'm not hating on it. You can't fill up on gummy bears. Dude, it was also that era where I didn't, I never watched Seinfeld until like five years ago.

It was just that era. Friends is better. Where I was, hmm. He's looking for it this week. Well, having not seen Friends, I can't argue with you, I guess. I've seen both. Yeah, and you like Friends better. What do you like Friends better over Seinfeld?

I just love the, I love the characters. They're not too heavy. They're not as quirky as some of the characters on Seinfeld. So you don't want a Kramer or a Jerry or Elaine or George's friends? And they're better actors too, I think, than the Seinfeld cast, especially Jerry. Why, I could give you Jerry, I guess, but she's fucking amazing. I know George is great, and she's good too. Louise Dreyfus.

Yeah. You know what? There's room for both. mean, they were- And George is great. And she's good to Louise Dreyfus. Yeah. I mean- You know what? There's room for both. There's room for friends. Sure. Sure.

That's not going to be either or. I'm not saying it does. Well, they were the two 90s titans, right? Yeah. And anything I've seen that cast in and other things, they've been great. Like, What's His Name on Curb was fucking awesome. Oh, David Schwimmer? Schwimmer was very good.

Yeah, he was very good. So fucking good on that. And he was good in Band of Brothers. So I don't have any hate in my heart for friends. I just never watched it. I don't care. I like them all separately, I think. I think I like them all separately, but together, yeah, I just can't get into that show.

Well, they meet at a coffee house every episode. That's their- Central perk. Yes. And they come in and their conversations are so witty and engaging. And when I come into the office, I want that kind of witty and engaging convos.

I don't get them. No. I don't get that. I think that's maybe why I long for a Ross or a- Why don't you give them the subjects ahead of time? Like, I'm gonna come in tomorrow. We'll meet at the table like we do every morning. Then you surround yourself with like, Toms and Jimmy the Hair Guys and like none of these

guys would ever show up on Friends. You know who's the most Friends like friend I have? Frank Five? Johnny the Law, man. Oh, Johnny Law. He would fit and the kid, nobody in my life fits on a cast of Friends. Johnny Law would. Johnny Law would Johnny law would he would Be banging Rachel for like half a season

He would fit right in and you know, that's why I wish that he lived in New Jersey rather than Boston Yeah, you're right. You're fucking right. He is no one else we got nobody Fuck we have a lot of Seinfelds. A lot of George Costanzos. A lot of Costanzos in here. A lot of Kramer's too. Wow. Yeah, I think you're right about Johnny.

I'm straining to think of people in town. Oh yeah, there's nobody else. Can Ming be like a neighbor, like a downstairs neighbor who's like a little wacky, but ultimately friendly and he would be the guy they talk about behind his back though. Right. Like they think you're stealing their Amazon packages or something. No, man. You don't know. He lives alone.

He would creep all those three girls out so badly. I didn't think about that. The whole episode would be like trying to avoid Ming. Yeah. They're like, he's not gay enough to be a platonic friend, but he's too gay. I don't know man. I saw him at taste funny. Nobody's running from Ming man. That guy's a superstar wherever he goes. Sure. It's a maverick. Yeah. He's the maverick. So is there an episode of friends that you suggest? I'm only in season one. Okay. If you find one that you're like, this is the one that Brian should watch.

This is the one that Brian, I'm talking about you? I will. Yes. I will give it my- You refer to yourself when you talk about yourself, you don't call, you call yourself Brian. Should I call you Brian? I've never called you Brian. I get called that. It doesn't matter to me. Yeah. Q. Q. I like you. But if you find that one- Yes, I know the one.

Yeah. And I'll watch it with an open heart. Here it is. Yeah. Oh, you know it already. I know it already. From season one, you know, it's not even time to cook. It's what made me do the deep dive. Okay. There's the episode where they stumble upon a tape from their high school prom. Okay.

And the dude who wants to get with it, the real hot one. Jennifer Aniston? Yeah, the one that wants to. Rachel? Yeah, Rachel. Okay. He is, her boyfriend stands her up for the prom, so his dad tells him to go upstairs, get

your suit on and you can swoop in and take her to the prom. And it is both heartbreaking and funny. Okay. Before he gets downstairs, he's hurrying up and getting ready. The boyfriend shows up and they walk out together and he's just standing there as his father's videotaping it. Oh.

It's fucking heartbreaking, but also like really well written. Okay. Yeah. Okay. It wraps your heart out, but then makes you laugh about it though. Right. Yeah. It was well done.

His expressions were good. Holy shit, is that it? Who's playing the dad? Um, yeah. I like cool. Nice casting. Can you be, can you imagine being one of the people, I mean, maybe it wouldn't have been the same show, who knows, but like there are people who turned down friends, you know, like actors and actresses who probably got these scripts and were like, I don't want to be on this show, you know, it has to have happened.

Were any of these six actors? Anybody? I don't think so. Jennifer Aniston, Leprechaun. Bruce Springsteen. Yeah. Right? There's a famous photo of them on a private jet to Vegas, I think, just before the season premiered. And the network got them the private jet or something

and said, enjoy the last time you'll ever be able to go to Vegas without being bothered. And it's like, you see, they look like children on the plane. Oh man. And, you know, that's when networks did cool shit like that. Yeah, there it is. First day on the set, last day on the set. That's them like flying to Vegas or something. Lisa Kudrow is definitely an undervalued communion.

Oh yeah. She has some shows that are so fucking good. Yeah. Yeah. So why won't you do the friends dive then? Can't do it. It's just like them together. I thought so too.

I thought it was too pretentious and douchery, but I found myself being like, it's, it really makes you relax. It feels like Subbittie buying a pair of Crocs. At the end of the day though. It's great. Like you turn off your brain and you watch some vapid television. I've been doing that with three's company lately. It's the same show every single time. Every episode is always a show. I've been rewatching Ash versus evil dead lately. I love that show so much. Why they canceled it? I don't fucking know, because everybody's an asshole. That's why it ended so quick.

It did end on a cool cliffhanger that also serves as like a nice sendoff for the character, so it's fine, but I wish they had made more. I can't say Tom Steeve Dave on that. I fucking love Bruce Campbell. Tom Steeve Dave. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.