Tell Em Steve-Dave - #659: Walt the Pugilist

Episode Date: November 23, 2025

Xmas news, Bry proposes an IJ prank, sports scandals, Q’s turning 50.

You broke his nose that bad? It was pretty bad. And this is the first time we're hearing about this? It's awful. It's awful. It sounds up my alley today. Yeah. It, it, I'd hit the ground.

My shoulder would turn to dust. I'd be like, ow, wow, parlay. Parlay. Parley. Tell him, Steve, Dave. Hello and welcome to this week's edition of Tell Em, Steve, Dave. I've got a sick Walt Flanagan. Hello.

I've got a perturbed. I've got a perturbed BQ. That's one thing after another over here today. What is this show going to be like? I don't know. But aren't, I thought Walt was getting sick at the Christmas thing. I heard his voice. I was like, well, we're all going to be sick for Thanksgiving.

How are you feeling? I'm so angry right now that, It's overriding every fucking, yeah, so don't worry about me. All right. Well, let's get going then. Yeah. Because I know Q is limited time, Walt, your lines are playing today. So we're recording early on a Sunday morning, 1145 on a Sunday.

So Walt can get to his game by one. Yeah, they started like one. Okay. All right. That's our goal today, Q. As sick as Walt is, I should take more. pages out of Walt Flanagan's book. I went to the doctor the other day. Well, first, let's do some housekeeping. Uh, Thanksgiving. Again, no Black Friday.

Well, no Black Friday at the general store. At the general store. But we will have Black Friday merch dropping midnight on Thursday. A brand new ball cap trucker hat. It's beautiful. Pretty sweet. I like it. It's going to go on sale at midnight on Thanksgiving. And all Also, excuse me, 40% off all other merch from Thursday at midnight till Sunday midnight. So a pretty sweet promotion where you could pick up some items at a real big deal, big steep discounts, 40% off, nothing to sneeze at. No, definitely not. So Christmas is done That's the other thing

Well not done Not for you Recorded It's recorded Yeah That's a difference Yeah It's going to

Probably clock in As maybe the longest episode ever That's what I was thinking today I think Space Monkey Save Christmas Hold the record So far for Christmas episodes

But Do you remember how long that was? I think it was like Four something hours Okay yeah This is gonna blow it out of the water This might be seven to eight hours long 18 contestants.

The fight for women's suffrage to participate in TSD Town events is finally over as we finally welcome female contestants. Wait, this is the first time. It's 2025 in TSD Town, you know. I love it. The gals finally get a seat at the table. We're progressive over here. Not for nothing, but one of my favorite one true, three stories of the whole thing. belong to one of those

I mean literally blew my mind Yeah, sound great There's controversial stories Scandalous stories Sultry stories and of course Head scratching stories But all Have one thing in common

They're all Christmas or Hanukkah stories And it's going to drop on Tuesday December 23rd on Patreon and Bandcamp And 100% of the band camp sales go to help two aunt families this year who are dealing with cancer in their family. So it'll be a two-parter on band camp. I think it'll be just one large episode on Patreon, though. Yeah.

I don't imagine we'll have to split it up. And part one will cost $4.99 and part two will cost $4.99. So it'll be an even split for those two families. All right. Christmas time. Christmas time and cancer. They go together hand in hand. they always have

they always have right that's what people think when they think Christmas I don't know what do you think of when you think of Christmas I think of pressure yeah like I got to buy people stuff I got to think of stuff for people

got to go to people's houses it's a whole lot of it's cold outside miserable but I feel like somebody at this table thinks the opposite, though. You're a big Christmas guy, right? I used to be.

Oh, you're not anymore? No, and with the advent of the Telmsi Dave Christmas special and the pressure. You're talking about pressure. The pressures of that have made it. So, like, I kind of, like, dread this time of year. But I will say, it is an awesome feeling to have the, have it in the can and that weight off your shoulders of, like, okay, all we got to do is edit a fucking nine to ten hour show. and riddle it down to any, you know, to a manageable episode. But that's the easy part.

The hard part is the pressure of, you know, will everybody be able to come? You know, will it all work out? Will there be any technical issues? There's a lot of moving parts. A lot of moving parts to this, yeah, like, and to get everybody's schedules to coincide so they can all come at the same time. That's no small feat. No.

We got, I mean, it is cool. though, like everybody that was involved and even, and the people who weren't involved who couldn't make it that night though. We do got a pretty killer crew in terms of like just friendly, cool people though.

You know, they sat around and waited for hours until it was their turn. Never once bitched. Never once were like. And you're talking hours. Yeah. Five hours. Yeah. They're good people, all of them. And, uh, I was thinking about like, like Chuck sat in the hallway for like six hours.

It comes in, smile on his face. You know what I mean? Like just as friendly and is helpful. And like, I want to, I want to be a part of it as, as, as I, they all were. And I'm using Chuck's name, but that's literally every person that was on the show was like, yeah, whatever, man. This is fun. It was, it was cool. Yeah, there's nobody that comes in and makes it hard.

Right. Like, nobody, nobody makes it hard. Everybody kind of wants to make it as a fun event as possible, and that's a very much appreciative. Yeah, that's for sure, man. Yeah. I told, I was so happy with Jimmy the Hair guy and his performance that I gave him the official Q.S. nod the other day. I saw that as he was leaving.

I saw the nod, and I saw Jimmy brighten up. Yeah. I was like, this Jimmy the Hair guy. I like Jimmy the Hair guy. I play, you know, I play like he's a little bit like I don't. But I really, I really do like the guy. And after having his contributions and, you know, overwhelmingly positive and fun to be around all the time, I thought this is a good guy to hang out with. And I honestly, I always knew he was going to come.

I was just holding him over the barrel a little bit. But yesterday I was like, nah, I got to let this guy in. I got to let him come. Uh, which by the way, I, you know, I'll be lucky to have him there, not the other way around. Jimmy the hair guy brings something every time he comes. He sure does. Yeah. Jimmy the hair guy, I was, I was thinking about him, Walt, you might be, uh, more able to

answer this is Jimmy the hair guy overexposed. I see that he's doing, uh, reviewing history stuff. He's on their Patreon. He's at these juggalo meets. I mean, those people who are, you know, getting him on. their shows, you know, they see the talent that is a Jimmy the Hair guy. They see that, you know, they wanted, they wanted some of that for their podcast. You want some of that magic for them.

Yeah. It's understandable. Sure. But does Jimmy the Hair guy owe us anything? We're discovering him after he bought that hair. I guess it is kind of like, if he doesn't buy that hair that I don't think he becomes friends with any of the guys. no that was a small price to pay for jimmy the hair guy to get the new circle of friends that he has

even though they use him as a punching bag from what i understand he's on a group chat and everybody makes fun of him poor jimmy the hair guy get him over there chuckling i think jimmy's one of those guys though that the jokes on everybody else oh yeah you know yeah i think so i think like you you look like you know you're ripping on jimmy but you're just flapping your gums you know Jimmy's out there making things happen. He's getting married. Do you follow him on Instagram or any chance? Oh, no.

Oh, you don't really use social media. If you follow him on Instagram, this dude is everywhere. He's at every con. He's at every juggalo meet. He's going to cemeteries to see dead people. I mean, this guy's on the move. He's, which is weird because I thought he was saving up for a wedding. Wasn't the whole thing like he has to save money?

That's what everybody says, but yet he continues to travel and do all these things. Yeah. I think his wedding might be taking place at a courthouse now. Oh, yeah. The freest of free? Yeah. Exactly. I'm going to that wedding.

You're going to go? I'm going to go to that wedding. How can I miss that? That's going to be the tell him Steve Dave social event of the season. Well, I know some people who aren't going. I'm sick. Well, it's not feeling too well. It's only in another eight months.

Who knows what's going to happen between that and now? If I feel better, maybe. Not your thing, really. Those kind of gatherings are not your thing. It's understandable. Q. Yeah. I know I, like, at times I've, uh,

I've suggested things for IJ, little bits. I used to suggest him to Casey. He never bit. He never liked any of them. I think I found a new one that's fail safe, though. Okay. Now, it does run a risk of death, which isn't good for the show, but I just read this article. Boy 15 dies after coworkers insert high pressure hose up his rectum in horrific, quote unquote, prank.

we had a bit where we put a something inside of Murray and he had to put a something inside of Murray and he had to give a talk while it was vibrating and whatnot and I you know to pull back the curtain a little bit you know we we have faith in each other right like we we will go along with things that we don't necessarily see and that one I was just like I don't get this one like I don't I think this one's weird I find there there's a couple of them in there that I'm like I don't know about this one like like looking back yeah yeah that was one that I was like I don't know about this one but I but you know you get to that place where you're like all right I guess like let's let's try it you know let's see how it goes and

it's it came out funny so I guess I definitely was wrong about that this one I might have to put my foot down on and be like I don't think we should blow up his an like a balloon. Usually, yeah, it usually means that you have to hold the person down and they're unwilling to get this because it's not the first time it's happened. In 2017, a 17-year-old car wash worker died after colleagues blasted a high-pressure air hose up his anus, causing his intestines to explode. People who did that got convicted of raping and killing the boy sentenced to more than 12

years in prison. But like what? I don't know. Like, I was, you know, I was 17 at one time. Walt, you were 17. Did you ever think of jamming a high pressure hose up your friend's ass and just letting the water flow? I can't say that I, that it ever crossed my mind. I didn't have access to any high pressure hoses, though.

So possibly if I did, I might have been like. I got a good idea. Who would have been your target? Heartsgrove, the guy with the crutches? You know, maybe, I mean, like, if I was defending them, if I was their lawyer, the guys who did this, I would be like, my clients didn't know the damage it would do. You know, they're not experts. They don't know what kind of pressure. They thought this was going to be like maybe the pressure of a water pick.

Mm-hmm. You know, not. They didn't think it would explode his intestines. It's, uh, I can't imagine that they, they thought that would be the outcome, though. Right. They thought it was just going to be like a horror, like, you know, like a college prank, man. Like, you know, or remember how when we were young? I remember they used to put pickles and kids butts and make them walk, right?

Well, so I heard anyway. Yeah. Yeah, that was the initiation cue. Do you remember that? The pickle walk? I remember it. Kevin put it in one of his movies is the other time I've ever really heard about it. You guys, that was true?

Oh, yeah. That was true. Well, it was, yeah, I mean, I never witnessed it firsthand, but yes, it was initiation. into high school where you would put a pickle in your ass and you would walk a certain distance and if the pickle fell out, you had to take a bite and put it back in. I went to an all-boys school and we didn't have anything nearly that gay. Well, you know, why do you want to bend someone over and put things up their ass unless there's a sexual element to it?

I was like the same thing about these high-pressure hose things. It's like to take your friend to rip his piece. pants off because they were holding him down, tear his pants off, tear off his underwear, spread his ass cheeks, get that hose in there. It's all very gay. Yeah. But you know, if you recall, I mean, rapey and gay, it's a terrible meeting. If you recall, I've never eaten a pickle, so it was going to be like a double whammy for me if I had ever gotten caught by the, by the older kids. So I would always have a banana on me. to see if they would let me swap out the banana for a pickle.

Can you even get a banana up your ass or is it too muchy? Well, no, no, I don't think it went in like you're thinking. I think you just had to hold it between your cheeks. Between your cheeks. I don't think they were actually worried so much about how far it went up or anything. Oh, okay. Yeah, it wasn't as weird as you're making it out to be or Brian's making it out to be. It was just kind of more.

Not that weird. I mean, it is less weird knowing that they're not inserting. Yeah. Oh, so it was just like a butt cheek hold. Yes, yes. Oh, that's, I see. Changes it, doesn't it a little bit? It does change it a little bit.

It's not great. And I still wouldn't take part in it. But at least it's not like, well, that person's going to murder someone one day. Because they're so fucking mentally deranged that they're shoving pickles up buttholes. Did, uh, you have one. You went to all-boy school. Was there any initiations that you recall, like from? Nah, we were pretty, it was like, maybe it's something to do with girls in the school building.

But, like, for the most part, I mean, there was some, like, typical high school bullying, like, just normal shit. I guess that goes. There's a hierarchy, I should say, for sure. But for the most part, everybody just kind of, like, was cool. Like, the absence of women, I always thought was, like, very, like, very, like, like helpful because it was like let's just fuck everybody's just chilling out having a good time for the most part so you think the addition of women some guys will be like you know what I know I can press Susie let's go grab that guy and stick a pickle in his ass yeah I do

really you think and these girls will be like oh my god look at look at Chad over there well I love it this way he's so cute and look at the way he shoved that pickle up that dorks anus. No. I don't think it'll get that details. I hope he asked me out this weekend. But I do think like there's a definite line in the sand between the people with the pickle in their ass and the people without the pickle in their ass.

Oh, yes, yes. And the girls don't want to date the guys with the pickles in their ass. No, that's hard to, it's hard to, like, forget about that image if you're going to the drive-in movie and he kind of does the stretch to kind of like you want to put his arm The whole time you're thinking, like, where is that hand? That hand actually took a pickle out of his own ass in front of the whole school. Do you want to kiss a guy who fucking has a shitty pickle, like, who ate a shitty pickle? So I do think, like, there is an element of control and dominance in that situation.

Oh, absolutely. You know, to this day, when I hear, whenever I hear anybody talk about pickleball, it kind of makes, I always think of, like, the pickle in the ass every single time I hear the word. Pickleball. I'm like, that's what we should have called it back in the 70s. Pick a ball. Yeah.

Yeah, I think that's it. That's why I think we didn't have stuff like that. Right. I used to see fights get resolved. Like, they'd be like, we're meeting at the fucking smokestack of the train station at 2.30.

We're going to fight. And like, there would be a big crowd and stuff like that. And then that, like, they would talk it out. I've seen that. talked out and resolved you know like somebody i i don't know if that happens if there are girls watching yeah negotiations yeah yeah because they couldn't let down their guard yeah correct yeah

whereas what guys so somebody in the crowd would be like come on what do you you you fucking twice the size of this guy i remember saying that to uh and then it's it's oh i well he fucking did did this and then it taught i mean i saw plenty of fights but i've never seen a movie where a fight gets resolved by chatting in the middle of a bunch of screaming teenagers, but I saw it in real life. Yeah, very rarely is that the trope in movies. Right. Yeah, somebody sticks up for somebody and then a discussion ensued. It's like how back in the day they used to do duels with, you know, flint and musculos, you know, they would fire the 10 paces and then turn around and shoot. They would bring a second, right? Because before they actually shot each other, the

seconds would go to the side and be like, hey, man, do we really got to do this shit? Or can we fucking just, you know, so it was kind of like that in a way, you know? It's like, look, if I have to shoot you, I will. But why don't we have our boys go over there and talk it out a little bit first? Right. If there's a beautiful woman there with a parasol, you know what I mean? And a beautiful frilly dress and she's watching. One of those guys is like, I'm going to fucking show this girl that I can kill.

Now, do you think girls back in high school were, I don't say the word. impressed but were they were they were they was that a way to court a girl was like okay i'll get to beat this guy up i don't know i have no experience with high school girls i'll bet you there were certain girls that were like uh all right he's like a tough alpha male he kicks ass so yeah but usually the guy that kicks ass was a jerk off yeah i remember that with the one fight i got into in high school that in my senior year it was over a girl and i did pretty well on the fight, and the girl went and stayed with the guy who, you know, that kind of took it on the chin. I didn't get the girl.

That's not a trope. She actually attacked me during the fight. I'm not kidding around. She jumped on my back. In the middle of the fight, she jumped on my back. It took her fingers and gouged him into my ear. And ripped out all the, like, took a big chunk of the inside of my ear with her with her long fingernails.

What the fuck was this fight about? I was in gym. We were in my senior year. And we had co-head gym class. And this girl, we were doing gymnastics. It was gymnastic week. So they had all the equipment out, the horse, the rings, the parallel bars. And we all had to do like a different, you had to go check off your little piece of paper.

or what, how many things you did on the horse or whatever. And so it was me and this other guy and this girl came over and she, she was definitely flirting. And her boyfriend took notice of it. And then later on at the later on that afternoon at the basketball court, he was like he wanted a, he wanted a piece of retribution. You hadn't really done anything. Well, I mean, I mean, I guess so. I guess so. mean yeah but but it it was at the end of the day though it was a it was a pretty bad fight

but they actually they did get married that actually i heard he died he's dead now yeah yeah he is mm-hmm it's like you won in the end my friend yeah long term maybe in the short term your your ear got couched a little bit but yeah i'd heard that um that the the the fall out of that fight was a lifetime of issues with breathing issues for that guy. Really? Because he had nose was broken so bad that it was a lifetime of like problems with his nasal passages and everything. You broke his nose that bad?

It was pretty bad. And this is the first time we're hearing about this? The pugilers, Walt Flanagan. Are we playing one true three? right now it happened it was in front of a whole bunch of people i told this story because it really shocked me because there's like about 50 people there at the basketball court and i'd say 45 of those people were like kick his ass kick his ass and they were talking to the other guy they wanted me to get fucking beat up i had like three people there who were rude for me

it really showed it really kind of showed their cards and i was just like Oh, wait a second. Wow, and she jumped on your back, huh? Yeah, she came out of nowhere. I guess she heard that we were fighting and she came over. I remember she was, like she let out a band she cry, like not even a real, like words, just like this guttural scream and jumped on my back. I was exhausted at that point, too.

I was exhausted. Because I, like, the adrenaline kind of had worn off. And so, like, I was kind of crashing a little bit. and she jumped on my back. I didn't do anything. I just let her just rip, rip the skin right out of my ear. Jesus, man.

Yeah, I didn't even throw her off. And nobody, did the crowd, didn't instantly turn on the other guy for having his girl come in and fight? Nope. I mean, at a certain point, he was very, he was pretty messed up

and he turned to one guy and he was like, he goes, he goes, should I, he looked at one of the guys. I was like, what should he do? And he was like, you know, like, and he was like, no, he goes, you got to keep going. He goes, you could still take them.

And it was bad. But then the girlfriend, like I said, and then they got like it, like in the movies, yeah, I would have got the girl, but it didn't happen. This is more like the last American Virgin. You ever see that movie, you know? I don't remember it now. Yeah, at the end, he doesn't get the girl. And you're just like, what the fuck?

Like this, like, watch the last American Virgin. if you have the chance. It's one of the, like a high school movie, but so depressing. Holy shit. Yeah, it's awful.

It's awful. Sounds up my alley today. Yeah. You're in the mood to stew. Yeah. And like that to me, I'll never forget, though,

it was more not the physical toll. It was the emotional toll of being like, holy shit, a lot of people don't like me. It could have been, though, but think about it this way because you weren't like, in high school, you weren't like, hey, everybody, look at me. You know, you were like, you were more of a, like, behind the seat, like, you know, in the background kind of guy. So, like, maybe this, like, you didn't have that many friends, whereas maybe this guy was just more popular, you know. It's not like they didn't like you.

It's just they liked him. Oh, well, that's a, that's a nice way. And I appreciate you putting that half a glass. full way of looking at it but at the end of the day it didn't matter the whole town was like rooting against me it felt like pitch forks and torches but you what sounds like you won the fight though yeah I would I mean yeah I don't and I like it was it was like I definitely took my own lumps out of that too though I mean he he had come up to me and I didn't even see it I was like playing basketball and he

hit me and I didn't even feel it because all I saw was I was he He was in front of me, and then all I saw was, like, a light blue color. And I didn't realize it for a set until I was like, holy shit, I'm looking up at the sky. I didn't even know, I had not even realized that I had gotten hit and I was on the ground. Wow. Because he caught me on the chin. And I did not even, I could not figure out what it was I was seeing. I was like, what the fuck happened?

Because all I was seeing is blue. And it was the clear blue sky that I was seeing. And then I had, like, I also had really fucked up. my shoulder and I never got it looked at and I also had for years and years and years and years um shoulder issues if I was playing a sport or something in the ball went a certain way it could knock my shoulder out and be fucking so painful I never really I never got it taken care of it was all because yeah it was all because you know from that one fucking afternoon man girls man like you said if we were in all boy school it probably never would have happened

Well, it definitely wouldn't happen because we would have, yeah. You want to be flirting with some dude by the palm of horse. Now, if I'm not mistaken, didn't she go by the name Bubba the Hut? She did when she first, but remember she lost about. She self-applied that? She slimmed down about her senior, or like her junior year though. She looked fine. Yeah, she looked at.

She had a sister, too. I think her sister died. She died too. Yeah, I think she died as well. Very cute girl. So her husband and her sister died? What's that? Her husband and her sister died.

Yeah. After assault and Walt. Yep. That's what you get. I mean, if I was a detective. I never saw, you know what? I never saw that guy ever again after that. Really?

He never, yeah, he never attended school after that. That was our senior year. He never came back to school. It was late in the school year. He didn't come back. And I never saw him again. Holy shit, man. Never once ever came into

Was ever in a room with him Or so I'm on the street, nothing Did you face any repercussions From the school or from parents? Oh yeah, yeah I remember the next day I had I definitely was like I gotta go to school

Even though my shoulder was really fucked up I was like I was like If I don't go to school People are gonna think something like It's almost like a sign of like something Like I lost or something It was like I was gonna drag myself to school No matter what happened

I had a big lip I had my shoulder I couldn't get my shirt on without my mom helping me because I couldn't raise my arm and I remember that I got there and as soon as I got there I got called to the office because they had heard about it

and they were like if you will be expelled and you won't graduate if anything happens if there's any more fallout to this which is weird because didn't it take place at Miller Park? Yeah it didn't take place on school grounds. Yeah so what the fuck like how do they extend their authority

to after school at a park? I think that they were trying to nipping in the bud. They didn't, like, there was nothing I could have dated. If they're, if they're, like, I couldn't raise my arm to throw another punch though because I had separated my shoulder, I think, at that point. So I just was like, sure, I'm not going to do anything. Anyway, I can't.

Yeah. Yeah, but did you say to them like, look, if this guy hadn't come on over and started the fight, none of this would have happened. I probably did. I probably did explain myself and, and, um, but the guy was like, look, I'm just telling you if anything happens, we'll expel you and you won't graduate. I was so close to not graduating anyway. graduated with like one extra credit, I think.

Jesus. Yeah. And I know that I only got that credit because the cooking teacher took pity on me. I didn't deserve to graduate my senior year. All right. Yeah. I would argue that you did. She took pity on me and gave me a passing grade just so I didn't stay back.

She actually told me that. She said, I would be detrimental to you if you stayed back because if I, you know, if you failed my class, I would feel like it would put you behind the eight. going forward so she she just passed me with and I didn't deserve the passing grade now if you stayed back do you think you would have went back for an extra year or would you have been like fuck it go to summer school yeah like probably wouldn't want to summer school I had gone to summer school the year before that because I knew they told me it's like you're not going to have enough credits if you don't go to summer school in your junior year so where's your summer school mine was all the way red bank okay yeah so that's like a it was a 15 minute drive mine was all the way up in homel

yeah I didn't have a license so it was like getting to summer school every day with a fucking hellish endeavor and then getting home i had to walk so far like i had to walk like three miles to get the bus like to get the borough buss right highlands it's like what's that charles not charles dickens uh what's one of those like you know or summer like what's that what's that author you know oh forget it Wow. Yeah. Walt Flanagan.

Boxing it out over a woman. It's crazy that you hurt the kid so much. He never came back to school. That's pretty wild. But, you know, there was only like a month left, though. Still, a month is a long time, man. I think he had, it was some pretty bad, some bone issues in the face. Wow.

That's fucking hardcore. man at least he can look back even though he had nasal issues and even though he died early he can look back and be like you know because there's so many people who fight over girls and then like nothing comes of it and like he actually got the girl stayed with the girl so maybe he was like oh well it was worth it I mean yeah maybe not he's like you know she would have stayed with me anyway probably she probably was going to stay with him I mean absolutely she would have stayed with him right yeah and I don't even think she was even like she was just kind of goofing around.

It wasn't like she was She was like grabbing your drunk or anything. No, not at all. Just kind of making jokes and shit, like doing corny shit. Right. Oof. God,

how much would it suck to get into a fight today? Oh, I would hate it. Oh, I would be winded in two seconds. We wouldn't want to have my, I wouldn't want like a, like somebody,

like a Walt Flanagan comes along and breaks my nose, like on that level. Yeah. Oh, God. and even like hurting someone else at this point I don't want to do you know what I mean you're just like I don't want to break anybody else's nose either yeah but if they put you in a position where you gotta like that guy in the bar that slapped you in the face you can't just let that slide uh if somebody slapped me in the face today I probably wouldn't let it slide yeah I don't think enough of the old Q's gone that I would just be like good day sir and and walk out yeah I probably would go a little ballistic but I do think it would it would it would take a lot to get me there. Like, I think if I woke up and there was someone in my house, I could kill them. I do think I could do that.

I could be like, just fucking, sorry, bro. You're in the wrong guy, wrong house. Right. You know? But like slights on the street and shit like that, I don't know. I'm like, I don't give a fuck anymore. But somebody's slapping me. Wow.

That would be rough. Because it is a real, like, it's not, like a punch is something different than a slap. Slap's almost like, I'm not even taking you seriously. I'm going to bitch stuff. Yeah, you'd probably just be so shocking, you know what I mean, that you do, that you, more than anything. I don't know. Yeah, I don't know. Wow, that's a fucking good one.

Well, let's hope I never find out. Right. I don't want to get it to a fight. I'd hit the ground. So now, you remember how, like, you'd get in a fight to the kid and you'd hit the ground and just keep rabbiting punches and shit like that? Yeah, like nothing's connecting. I don't know. I'd hit the ground.

My shoulder would turn to dust. I'd be like, ow! Wow! Parlay! Parlay! Parley! I watch a series of podcasts where, like, they all, like, fight with each other and all, like, we'll watch each other's videos and make fun of each other and that kind of stuff.

And they're always, like, I'll fight you. And these are all, like, I'm talking, like, 55 to 60-year-old men. Like, I want to see you in a boxing ring. It's like, do you know how much skill it takes to box? But you can't just step into, yeah, stamina, skills, footwork, all that shit, like to just be like with no training at all to be like 55 to 60 and be like, I want to get a boxing ring and kick some ass. It's like, you're fucking crazy. Well, if your, if your opponent is also that age and has as much experience as you, I can imagine it's not that crazy. You could probably do it.

But I think you underestimate how tired you'll be within within a minute. Yeah. Exactly. All right. Well, it's about that time, everyone, where we talk about some sponsors. Factor. Faw always feels like a reset between back to school,

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I heard you were, you were telling somebody that, uh, he's on a very restricted diet. Let me tell you, you ain't, you ain't smelled anything to you smelled, um, salmon gas come out, come out, you know. It's a, it'll, it'll put hair on your chest. Doctor says that they can guarantee there will be no factor gas from their salmon. You just hear that little, and then all of a sudden you're like, holy shit, I'm swimming with the fishes. And then you say socks can only eat chicken, right? She can, well, yeah, she, she can eat other things, but she'll only eat it if chicken is sprinkled on top.

of it like the most unseasoned plain chicken like boiled chicken and you ain't smelled nothing and when you come into the house and when you smelled boiled chicken it smells nasty it doesn't smell like KFC I'm like oh my god I go how does that smell so horrendous isn't this like not even a mildly surprising that like a Walt Flanagan who's so particular has two dogs that are also so particular There's a vibe. You're picking up on a vibe. Yep. You know, people like that.

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you open that box and it's underwear and you're like mother and less it's me undies that's the only exception me yundies yep and uh

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Four? I don't know. Maybe for Twitter. Well, after what end, no. I don't know, to just to show M-Undies my, uh, my, my, um, my commitment to their product. Yeah, they're like, please don't. Yeah, they're like, you're 60.

That's okay. We're good. Yeah, if you see the models in the IDs, they don't look like me. You're right. And now, all right. There's another one? There's only one more. Oh, my God.

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Okay, because they said we're a fan both like me, but I'm not a fan of either, really. It always feels good to be right. Again, I got to ask you, what are we picking? What's right? Again, I don't understand any aspect of this commercial. You're going to learn. Okay, please talk about your thoughts.

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That's easy then. And when I can navigate the app, you know it's for simpletons. And I made my picks so easy. easy. Simpletons. And, you know, the prize, the prize is in the picks. That's what it's all about.

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Good. Excellent. Is that officially over? It's officially over. Did you hear about, this is the craziest story that has definitely been squashed about the basketball players who got caught shaving points? Oh, yeah, I read about that, yeah. It is nuts how that has not become like the biggest scandal in the country. I'm sorry

Say that one more time Walt I'm sorry Professional basketball players Have been caught Shaving points When did that happen? Professional baseball players have done it now And it is kind of like

Been swept under the rug And suppressed And it is shocking Then it shows you the power Of these professional sports leagues They are basically, I think, telling networks not to even talk about it. Like, they talked about initially, and then it just kind of went away.

It was big for like a day. You talked about zillions of dollars. Now, in play that could have been. People lost that were like, I would have won. Yes. I lost money that I would have won, yeah. Yeah, it is fucked up how, like, you see the powers that be, the stories they want you to hear about and the stories they want you, that, you know, that go the way the Dodo Bird,

they don't even talk about it anymore. It is absolutely insane. It's really strange because, like, that happened in the, I believe in the 50s. That's when the first point shaving happened. And it was like a national scandal. But like now they're just like,

like you say, sweeping it under the rug like it's nothing. Well, I mean, it's eventually going to happen. I mean, there's no way it isn't happening in the NFL too, though. Right. There's just too many weird shit that goes on that if anybody is shocked

that it's eventually going to come out that the NFL is up to some players or some refs or up to some shaky shit. I mean, you have to be you know, waiting in line to buy a bridge somewhere if you're shocked about that.

Waiting in line, you're not even like, ooh, who's going to be good. I hope there's still a bridge when I get that up there. I hope they don't sell out. It's the same thing that's wrong. with everything these days.

The reason that happened is because the league's gotten business with the, like, they should have never allowed sports betting to get involved with professional sports. It's just, they shouldn't let the players do it. It's, it's the second something becomes, yeah, but they do though,

because they do because they have all, you could bet on your fucking phone now. And you, you have athletes doing commercials for betting for betting for betting apps and stuff like that. apparently, you know, you're not allowed to bet if you're a professional athlete on anything. Oh, really? Like, not even, like, not even like sports related, non-related stuff still? Even other leagues, I don't think you're allowed to bet if you're a professional athlete.

There's the rules in the NFL and everything. Players are gotten in trouble just for betting on, in other sports. But they're still in the game. It's not like what Pete Rose, where they're like, get the feel done out. Right. So that's like, giving me a speeding ticket. for going 30 miles per hour in a 25 zone. I'm like, oh, I got that slap on the wrist.

All right, thanks, officer. Like, if they're like, guess why? You go five miles per hour of the speed limit. You're losing your fucking wrangler. You're using license. You'll see me going 24 miles per hour the entire time. And, you know, the corporate corporations getting, look, is there any doubt that it ruined fucking,

anytime big business gets involved in anything, it fucking kinds of ruins it. Yeah, I've never really bet on any kind of these fan dual sites or whatever. You do on price picks. I don't know if it's bad. I don't really know what that fucking service even offers. It's so bad.

It seems like fantasy sports kind of, yeah. But there's one thing that I have discovered watching football first as long as I have. You cannot figure it out. One week from the next teams look like world beaters. And the next week, they look like they couldn't beat a high school team. and that's why you can never get a handle on shit because it's so it fluctuates so wildly

and now you throw in the aspect of like I mean there was a guy they showed that guy who got caught in baseball you can bet on his pitch if his pitch is going to be a ball or strike and so he let everybody know in this little circle like hey I'm going to throw a pitch

I'm going to throw a ball and you should see the ball he throws It's like over the catcher's head. Right. It's like these are the things that the FBI is accumulating, I guess, when they finally bring them to court. But they've been charged with this, you know, innocent to prove and guilty. But I don't think the FBI brings these and announces these things if they don't have airtight cases. Solid evidence.

Because, yeah, I'm sure that they are pretty confident. Once they start naming names, because you're fucking put the scarletter letter on every coach and player who's caught up in this scandal will never be looked at the same, even if they're found innocent. Yeah. You'll be under the suspicion forever. Well, didn't something like that kind of happen to Otani? Who's Otani?

He's the pitcher in L.A. What happened? Didn't his trainer, my, I don't know if I'm wrong about it. Didn't his trainer was found putting bets on him? I thought we talked about it. I thought you were the one who told me about this. It's possible, yeah. You know, I mean, there's so much sports and gambling stories.

I don't know. I don't know about, I don't remember that, but you could be right, though. Well, honestly, if I heard it, I heard it from you. And if I'm getting the facts wrongs a year later, then that's more likely to. I thought you would know, but. I don't follow baseball that closely. But, yeah, there may have been a scandal involving that guy. I thought, like, his translator was, yeah.

Yeah, it says that his former interpreter, and I'm not going to try to pronounce the name, was sentenced to nearly five years in prison for stealing almost 17 million from the baseball player to pay off gambling debts. Separately, in a new lawsuit filed in August 2025, Otani and his agent are accused of sabotaging a luxury real estate deal in Hawaii, though the details are still developing. Because if you could bet on a player just to throw a ball. Yeah. you know, and all that player has to do is just not throw a strike. Right.

Pretty easy. Pretty hard to prove. Exactly. Yeah. It says here the background of it is the scandal broke in March 2024 when reports emerged about large wire transfers from Otani's accounts to an illegal bookmaker. Otani stated that he was unaware of the transfers, but the initial story was that the money was for his interpreter's debts. 17 million?

Jesus Christ. How much money is this? fucking guy making that you can steal 17 million it's not noticed and how does the interpreter have access to his accounts he might be the first billion dollar baseball player oh really yeah that's how much they pay him oh yeah he's not good huh he's like the bay brew the modern day babe ruth yeah he pitches he hits home runs oh really i think yeah the amount of whatever they're paying him they say is such a even that is like such a bargain right because of all the money he generates worldwide and expect like in his own country with his murder

merchandise and his jerseys and shit. Right. Yeah, they can pay him a billion and still make money and profit off of them. Oh, my God. Playing baseball. Yeah. Child's game. Yeah.

Game kids are like a pickup and they're like, hey, let's do this. We got nine people. Yeah. Billion dollars. Should have played more baseball when I was young. I didn't. Walt, I also didn't learn from you. I did take a page out of your book.

I should take more pages out of Walt Flanagan's book, I think. You leave my book alone. Leave my book alone. No, no, no. Let me just take my pages. Just a page or two. Just a page or two, buddy. I know you'll rip them out and you still won't even read them.

I'll get halfway through. Like, wait, what's that? This paper would roll a good joint. Went to the doctor, a urologist. He's like, okay, you got to go get a blood test. You know, regular blood test. Went to the place they could hardly get any blood out of me. They said, you are severely.

severely dehydrated. Really? To start drinking water, lots of it. That was Tuesday that happened. Were you aware you were drinking water? I was aware I wasn't drinking water. Now, why would you continue to not drink water then? Because I'm an asshole.

I don't understand that, rationale, though. I don't know. It just like, it just falls like by the wayside. You know what I mean? It's like I'll start to do something and then it'll trail off. I'll start to do something, then it'll fall. off. I'll start to write in a journal and then one day I'm just, I don't do it and then I'll do it for the next week. But like the water thing is just like, you know, it's not easy to drink

that much water every day. No, it is a, it is a task. It's certainly not fun to do to drink the amount of water that you're supposed to drink. Yeah. So I've started for the last four days I've been drinking 100 ounces of water a day, which is, you know, 28 ounces shy of a gallon. Do you feel better? I do. Yeah, I do feel a little bit better. So I think I don't feel was like distracted almost like my head is not as foggy as it was maybe so pissing a lot more too for sure nice clear piss oh yeah nice dark yellow urine that I used to have oh that tasty dark yellow and I'm using a water bottle I can't remember her name because she gave it to me so long ago but a nice lady sent me a water bottle with uh it has like

Bluetooth and shit. So it's like, it'll tell you like, if you open it up, it says hello. And then it tells you how much water, like 28% for the day. So, you know, I know that I have to keep drinking. That's my life now, Q. Monitoring my water intake. We're worrying about this epidural that didn't take, you know, it's. Yeah.

No, um, that sucks. Now, the urologist. Yeah. Is, I, I just find this blows my mind. your back problems, your urologist is taking care of that? No, no, no. When I went to the urologist, I told them about it because we talk about a lot of stuff. Oh, yeah, yeah.

I was just like, I've never heard that before. That is strange. It's all like tied, all your issues at your back are tied to your... It's hard to my weenery. It's like first time in history, medical history, you've seen this, but it's all about your boner. That's not the first time that's been seen. Yeah. Yeah, so I talked to the urologist about lots of stuff, and he said probably what they're going to do is give you another epidural with a steroid in it.

And sure enough, when I went back to the orthopedic guy, that's what he said we have to do. So I got that done on December 4th. It did not work. So we have, I mean, the first part didn't work. So the second part, I'm hoping it works because it ain't cheap to be getting these epidural. So you already had epidural and didn't do anything? It killed the pain a little bit, but not like totally. So every once in a while, like it'll start to hurt and then I'll get the tingling down to my fingers and that kind of shit.

And then he's like, well, we'll try it again, but it could be a pinched nerve in your arm. So if it's that case, then we've got to use this machine. Then he shows me a machine with all these needles in it. And he's like, yeah, it's kind of painful. So I'm really hoping the second episode. Yeah. A lot of members of TSD town are dealing with tingly appendages. Yeah, get them too.

I didn't say that. I don't like to say it's get them, but I'll just say that I've been talking. Are you tingling, get them? Tingling a little bit. Yeah, it's a tingling. That, you know, that when you get to a certain age, when things start to tingle. Yeah, the wrong things, the wrong thing starts to tingle, yeah. There's not always tingling anymore down there.

It's just, you know, like, even as my doctor, I was like, man, I used to, like, what happened? Like, I used to be able to, like, you know, think of something. And there I am, not anymore. You can think about it all day. It ain't going to move the needle. Nope, I ain't going to tingle. Nope. I'm too old now. You used to tingle.

Make you something else. I didn't go to work anymore. I just sit there all day focusing. Tingle, God damn you. Tingle. Yeah. I've been thinking, you know, and I know we're getting close to the end here, so I'll just put it in your, in your head for food for thought.

but I've been, you know, I turned 50 in March. Yeah. And I'm, the big 50. And I'm like, well, it might be time to, like, totally throw out my wardrobe and get a more refined older person's wardrobe. Like, it might be time for the print teas and the, you know, the hoodies to go away. Really? Polyester. What's that?

Well, you broke up. go a polyester wardrobe? Well, no. I mean, I was thinking more like cottons and wools, you know, and like, you know, it's just white old, dull. You're thinking of what you equate with being, dressing as an older person is like dressing fancier? Yeah, a little elevated, a little bit more like.

Turtlenecks? Sure. Maybe a turtleneck. I don't know. I haven't really gotten into it. I, I'm like, you know, I wear baseball hats so often. And I'm like, you know, should I be running around at baseball caps when I got the number five in front of my age? You know what you've stopped wearing and it was your signature look?

And you probably, I would think, I would suggest going back to this because everybody equates you in this was the flat top, the flat cap. Yeah. You just stopped wearing that totally. I don't know if you're trying to change it up. You don't want to get typecast as that guy. But that was a great look. You like that? I should, I love that look.

Weave that back in. Okay, all right, that's good. I like that. Now, I was watching Boardwalk Empire years ago, and Al Capone was chided for wearing that kind of cap saying it makes him look like a child. He should wear like, you know, like a more of a stove top. Derby, you know, not a stove top, but like, yeah, more of a derby. Like, could you pull off a derby all the time?

Like going back old school, like in the 30s, you know, when everybody wore that style hat? I think, I think it's so out of fashion that. it probably would be... He looked like a hipster. Yeah, he would kind of look like a D-bag for trying to do it. Like, look at me. Look how ironic I am. But the flat top, that was a very New York look for a New York type of guy.

He looked like a guy who came from the city. And it just would, I believe it was the look that most people were introduced to you in. Yeah. Probably. And the reason I started wearing that so much, though, is because I couldn't wear the baseball caps on TV without getting the rights to the Yankees logo. So I just started wearing that. And then when we started making Telms Steve Dave hats, I kind of shifted over to that, you know, to represent the show on the show. And, you know, we had so many of them. I don't know. You don't think like a, you don't think a man in his 50s could pull off like a fedora? Like, you know, like a, like a, like a, like a, like a, like a, like a, like a, like, you know, like a, like a, like a, like. a gentleman's, a gentleman's cap? I think if you're going out for the night, you're doing something fancy for the night, you could probably do it,

but like as a regular. Yeah, every day, just running down to grab lunch at a delicate test. And yeah, the fedora may be a little too much. You may be like, you know, you're trying too hard,

gotta give off that kind of vibe. Hmm. I don't know. Maybe I'll put some thought. I put like I said, I just started the thought to it. I mean, look, I have a, when I'm in the pool in the summer, I have a cowboy hat, like a straw, a stetson that I wear to keep the sun off me. You know, you know, you know, you're sick, Keel.

Let me tell you. Yeah. And I'm like, you know, and I never wear that, like, and feel like I look like a dickhead. I'm always like, ah, my summer stetson. I'm getting in the pool. I'm out by the pool. Keeps the sun off your head and your, and your sun off. Maybe a fedora could do the same in everyday wear for me.

Hmm. What do you think, Walt? No, your face is saying... I think he could pull off any hat. I don't think there's a hat. He can't pull off. All right. I'm just starting to think about it.

I, you know, I don't know. You got a little time. Yeah, you guys, when you guys turn the clock to 50, you guys weren't like it's time to elevate my wardrobe a little bit and start dressing like an adult more. The only time I feel that way is when I'm at my ideal weight. Otherwise, I'm like, I look like a fucking fat slob anyway. So like, why try to dress up?

a fucking, you know. Every year, I always make the, like, my New Year's resolution is I'm going to wear jeans more, and I never do it. Yeah. Why don't you do it? I mentioned this before. Jeans feel like a denim straight jacket to me. Like, you know, I got to have my legs to, you know, not feel restricted.

Also, I feel like Walt Flanagan is a guy who, like, I don't care what age he turns. He's going to be like, comfort is. primary. Yeah, that's more paramount to me than, you know, if somebody thinks, like, I'm not dressed appropriately for my age. You should wear a fedora with that sweat outfit you have on right now. But, you know, gene technology has come a long way from, like, I've heard. I've heard, yeah.

Maybe you, you know, I'm not saying go Ming Chen crazy, but maybe, maybe, you know, maybe more of a stretch gene. Yeah, I've heard about that. difference anymore. Yeah, it might work for you. Yeah. I, I, that's why I say, I always, I always say I'm going to make the effort to wear jeans more.

But inevitably, I'm like, by January 3rd, I'm like, fuck it. You know, sweatpants. I get it. Yeah. Shit. It's gotten to the point where if you, if I saw you in jeans, I'd be like, oh, that's odd. Yeah, you'd think I was going to a funeral. Yeah, yeah.

Like, he's dressing up for something. He saw that. Yeah. That man's either going to pan for gold or to a funeral. Tell him, Steve, Dave. Go lions!