Tell Em Steve-Dave - #666: Hell Is Empty And All The Devils Are Here
Episode Date: February 23, 2026In the most devilish of episodes the Baron dispenses facts, the holy bible vs the satanic bible, satanic statements, benefits of being catholic, 3 potentially possessed men tell personal tales of demo...nic infestation.
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All right, okay.
And now, TSD 666.
You think the Holy Bible is all about like cock, cock,
size and semen load? Well, I mean, as a, you know, cautionary
tale, you know, don't always go for the guy with the biggest piece of junk.
I'm just pilot. What a jerk.
Questions before Brian Q, uh, weigh in? Get him?
Well, I think I might, my, my, my mate.
All right. There we go. I think he's good. I think a demon got him. I think he's
speaking and you're talking.
Hello, and welcome to this week's edition of Tell of Steve, Dave. I'm here with
BQ. Oh, I'm here with Waltz.
Good, get him.
How you stankin?
How you're stankin?
And we will have more guests soon because this is a very special episode.
Walt, as you know, one of our favorite numbers, 6666.
Is there any more metal a number than that?
Does not, but do you know why?
I always just heard 666 was the number of the beasts.
Right.
Do we know why he likes it?
If you want to summon the baron, he can tell you, it's one of his facts that he's going to be reciting tonight.
Yeah, I'd love to.
You want to get right into giving a recital immediately within the first 30 seconds?
I mean, people like the Baron.
Do you remember the poem?
You know how long it's been since the Baron has been on proper TSD?
It has been a long time, right?
Fiend of Fact.
Should I do it early?
We should wait, right?
You can do it now when you kick off a fact.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind kicking off with a fact.
All right.
What's the...
Do you don't remember the poem?
I don't remember the poem.
Boy, dude, that's really not going to bode well for you at the Ants.
Yeah.
Like, they're like, you're like, you was out of touch.
He can't remember the Barrett's phone.
They say that already.
They're just proving it.
I don't mind.
Fiend of fact.
What does it?
Fiend the fact appear before my sight?
I got to be honest.
Makes two of us.
I've heard it many times.
Tom, what is it?
Darkness, drowned out light.
Darkness, drowned out light.
Beamed of fact appear before my sight.
And now,
All right, boof.
Here he is.
I wasn't that far off.
There would have been a thunder clap.
Yeah.
Following that poem.
Yeah.
But the only thing, the only thing I needed today when I texted earlier didn't happen.
My thunder stick is not on the table because apparently 17 phones, not one, though, can get a text.
So hopefully, Declan, maybe you can help us out if you would be so kind.
and just put in a sound effect for a thunder clap after that.
You're having phone problems?
Get them?
No,
I just didn't.
My phones were all charging.
Oh,
so you got the text.
You just didn't see it.
Yeah.
Oh,
I see.
I thought somebody was jamming the frequencies at the plaza in that one.
That's why you need.
No,
I have my phones over there charging.
Somebody should do before work, right?
Huh?
So you should do that before work.
So when you get here,
the message come in and you're ready to go.
How the fuck are seven phones?
dead at the same time.
That was impossible.
So an EMP goes out.
Because I was out to buffet watching Pluto.
Okay.
So, yeah, it trains the battery pretty quick.
That makes sense.
So, wait, but how long were you out of communication?
Oh, oh, God, who know?
I mean, I checked about two hours ago and didn't look at it until I was here.
And I said, where's my thunder stick?
And you looked at me at that dumb face.
What thunder stick?
No concern that he needed.
Any task today is what you're saying?
None.
Feet were up.
Hands behind the head.
A feather going up and death.
So tonight, since the Baron is back for this very special episode, episode 666,
the Baron would not miss episode 666.
I'm going to be telling a fact every six minutes in this episode.
Wow.
All right.
That's why can do one of your phones fucking put a six minute time?
on here and let me know when I have to read a fact.
Interrupt what anybody is saying.
I don't care how important it is.
You let me know that I have to recite a fact or your internal soul is at
fucking risk in him.
If I don't read a fact every six minutes in this episode.
See, that's two things you needed from Getham today.
And he's doing it.
That's a-
What, putting a timer on his phone?
Well, yeah, you needed two things for him.
He didn't do one.
He's doing the second one.
That's a Hall of Fame career of baseball, buddy.
It's a batting 500.
To answer your question, Q, my.
very first fact is the number 666 is associated with the devil because of a passage in the book
of Revelation 1318, which identifies it as the number of a man and a mark required for economic
activity. It is widely interpreted by scholars as a numerical code for Emperor Nero, symbolizing
Roman persecution of early Christians. While seven is often considered the number of
of perfection.
In the Bible,
six represents human imperfection.
Thus,
666 is seen as the triple downfall,
a trinity of imperfection.
Man, not God.
Wow.
Holy crook.
Nice.
So,
I still don't understand what, like,
I mean,
a financial thing,
like crypto,
they were saying?
You're saying that Nero, Nero would mark people with this?
It's a numerical code.
Scholars widely interpreted this as a numerical code for Emperor Nero.
Oh, I said, okay.
Wow, he's really getting singled out there, Nero, huh?
Well, didn't he crucified Jesus on his orders?
Oh, was he the one?
Was he him?
I don't know.
I don't know anything, man.
I mean, I think he would be.
We always go after Hitler,
but this fucking guy who, you know,
who made everything happen and put Christ on the cross.
I mean, he really gets Jesus for his wrath, doesn't it?
Yeah, I know, because you really don't want to go on and on about who killed Jesus.
He got picked up by the wrong handle.
He was, uh,
Today's day and age.
Killed himself, it says,
Nero?
Committed suicide, yeah.
The emperor of the Roman Empire killed himself?
That's what it's saying here.
I mean, it's a very long Wikipedia entry, so it's hard to skim it.
I mean, how much, how can you not have a better life than being the emperor of fucking Rome?
Like, what, what are you missing?
Isn't it anything that you want you get?
Everything, right?
Literally.
Like orgies and this and that.
Daily orgies?
I mean, it wasn't that one guy in Gladiator trying to fuck his sister the whole time?
Yeah, it's like, I mean, it just seems like it's good to be the king no matter who you are, you know?
It says here, Pontius Pilot.
Oh, that's right.
The Roman god.
governor of Judea officially ordered Jesus crucifixion.
While Roman soldiers carried it out.
Pontius pilot, what a jerk.
Hey, man, he's just trying to keep law and order, man.
He was getting all reports of this unruly hippie running around town.
Causeing all sorts of problem doing magic tricks.
Speaking out against, you know, speaking heresy at the time, I guess.
Flipping tables at the temple and shit.
That's a rabble around.
I'm chilling with hookers.
All day and night, man.
That guy, yeah.
So, you know, you don't.
the Romans were just trying to keep things on the control.
They fucked up.
They fucked up.
They didn't know where they were crucifying.
Wow.
Let's see here.
I don't really have a...
Well, wait, I do have something.
I have a game for you guys if you wanted to play it.
How many one minutes of the next fact to get them?
Two minutes, 20 seconds.
All right, we got two minutes, 20 seconds.
So I have some passages here.
Yeah.
And you guys have to guess whether they're from the Holy Bible or the Satanic Bible.
Oh, all right.
All right.
And if you say in your heart, why have these things come upon me?
It is for the greatness of your iniquity that your skirts are lifted up and you are violated.
Holy Bible, I'm going to say.
Yeah?
I mean, could you read it one more time for me?
And if you say in your heart, why have these things come upon me?
It is for the greatness of your iniquity that your own thing.
Your skirts are lifted up and you are violated.
So if I say, if I Charlie Brown, what was me?
I get, I'm getting porked in a dress?
No.
Men wore dresses back in the day.
I think they're talking to women and they're like, hey, if, if you're sinful, well, I looked it up.
Oh, okay.
Can men can't get wear dresses?
If you're saying, it's true.
Yeah.
And they did it back in those days.
Yeah, but so do women.
Mm-hmm.
They're like, if you're, because of your iniquity, we're going to, we're going to, we're going to rape you.
That sounds like, I don't know, it sounds like the old school Bible, to be honest.
I don't know that the Satanic Bible went in that direction, right?
Well, maybe.
I might have gone down that direction a couple times.
All right.
But you guys are both right, from the Holy Bible, Jeremiah 13, 15 through 16.
Mm-hmm.
All right.
There's some issues there that Jeremiah's got to work out.
The Baron is a Bible scholar.
I believe it.
He didn't even know who crucified Jesus.
I was just testing your dumb asses
to see if you are worthy of being in his presence.
It turns out we're not.
I had to Google it.
That was the Old Testament, right?
That was the Old Testament.
We threw that out, though, right?
I think Old Testament is widely regarded as like,
that's a little bit too...
Yeah.
Christianity is based on the New Testament, right?
Yeah.
All right.
Behold, sayeth Satan.
I'm a circle on whose hands stand the 12th Kingdom.
Six are the seats of living breath.
The rest are sharp as sickles or the horns of death.
Therein the creatures of earth are not, except in mine own hands, which sleep and shall rise.
Time for fact.
Chocolate is referred to as devil's food due to its decadent, rich, and dark nature,
which was considered sinfully indulgent in the late 19th and early 20th centuries.
The name originated as a playful, dark contrast,
to the light, airy and white angel food cake.
Mm.
All right, back to your, uh, that's a lot of, that's a lot of, uh, lip time that given Satan.
I'm going to go with the satanic Bible on that one.
Potantic Bible?
Yeah.
I go holy Bible again.
Ready, keep all, uh, get them?
You don't get no thunderclaps.
Oh, I thought it was a thunder clap for every one for every, okay.
No, no, the baron gets thunderclaps.
All right, what do I get?
We get like a fizzle, like a little, like static or something.
Strambonne.
So wait a second.
So Walt, you went holy and Q, you went Satanic.
And Q, you were right.
Yeah, I don't remember Satan getting that much mic time in the original Bible.
Like, wasn't he just mainly in the desert tormenting Jesus?
And then other than that, he kind of got a lot of...
The thing I remember from the children's Bible is him sitting up on this cliff with Jesus.
And I don't know if this ever really happened, but he was,
was talking to Jesus and he was like, look at everything in front of you.
If you come with me, like, all that you survey is yours.
Yeah, it was, I remember that's scaring the shit.
Right.
Because Jesus wasn't, Jesus wasn't it?
Yeah, Satan was like, come on, baby.
Yeah.
But other than that, I don't think he got a lot of more talking other than that in the Bible.
Not that much.
Stay tuned for Fact 3.
Oh, this is exciting.
Probably only four minutes ago.
Probably going to answer another one of your questions.
The earth is utterly broken.
The earth is torn asunder.
The earth is violently shaken.
The earth staggers like a drunkard.
It sways like a hut.
Its transgression lies heavy upon us.
It falls.
It will not rise again.
The man staggers like a drunkard and sways like a hut.
Shout out to the ants on the parade route who had a Walt Flanagan as the man sign.
Yeah, that was great.
Came at me out of nowhere, man.
Out of the crowd comes this wall.
Flanagan signed. That's wild. It was awesome, man. I'm so excited. I could
I promise them I'd send you photos. And I did. You did? I did. I'm going to
say that satanic. Satanic. The earth is utterly broken. The earth is torn asunder. The earth is
violently shaken. The earth staggers like a drunkard. It sways like a hut. It's
transgression lies heavy upon it and it falls.
The job of the hut? I mean it's spelled one T. One T. It's probably not Java.
I don't remember anything that cool sounding in the Bible Bible.
So I'm going to say again, Satanic.
Satanic.
To satanics.
Two satanics.
This is an apocalyptic vision of the end of the world in Isaiah 24-19.
Okay.
Book of Revelations, eh?
Isaiah.
Isaiah.
Okay.
Yeah, and I picked from Revelations because it was all too like, this is obvious.
All right.
Yeah, it seemed very obvious.
Let's see.
there she lusted after her lovers
whose genitals were like those of donkeys
and whose omission was like those out of horses.
A horse, that's satanic.
Horse omission.
There she lusted after her lovers
whose genitals were like those of donkeys,
whose omission.
Holy.
Going holy on that one.
Really?
You think the Holy Bible's all about like cock size and seaman load?
Well, I mean, as a, you know,
cautionary tale.
You know, don't always go for the guy
it's the biggest piece of junk because it's always ends up in the same way in a fucking broken dreams and tears.
Yeah, I read, I usually read this passage before I have sex with him.
Just so she knows not to expect too much.
Yeah, it may look nice and it may, you think it might get the job done, but not really.
Look at what I'm coming at you with.
It's just a mess when it's all my question.
It's like Mr. Eds.
So Q, you say satanic.
Satanic.
Walt, you say holy.
Holy.
Well, know your stuff.
Ezekiel 2320.
Fucking Ezekiel was freaky, huh?
Let's see.
God can't stop chariots of iron.
I thought God was all powerful.
That's Satanic Bible.
Oh, that's it?
That's it.
Just those three words?
God can't stop chariots of iron.
I thought God was all powerful.
Holy Bible.
He's quoting some
dog shit
who's questioning God's might.
You're going Satanic, Q?
I'm going to go Satanic. That sounds like a guy who needs another option.
Hugh, I'll see you in hell.
Walt's getting all these right.
Yeah?
Judges 119.
Well, he's the baron.
I mean, what did you explain?
What do you think I was going to outfact him?
That's true.
That's a tough one.
The gods of wisdom defiled have had their saga
and their millennium have become a reality,
each with his own divine path to paradise.
have accused the other heresies and spiritual indiscretions.
Satanic.
So the Satanic Bible and the Holy Bible,
they all speak in these kind of like innuendos.
They never really get to the point.
They never just like say it out on Front Street or Main Street.
They really dance around us so you can't understand.
They really can go like ponder what the point is.
And when was the Satanic Bible written?
20s, right?
Yeah, like last century, right?
I thought it was.
Yeah, I thought it would.
Well, Anton LeVay wrote it, so it would have been like the 60s, I thought.
So he had a chance to really update it from modern times, but he still chose to write in that flowery language.
I'm going to say it's satanic.
That's two for Satanic.
I remember when I was a wee lad in the Staten Island Mall.
There we go.
Oh, sorry.
Sorry to interrupt you, Q.
No, no, no.
This is it.
I can't wait for Factory.
Now, I don't only have a few.
I'm not going to make it to the end of the episode.
I thought I was doing one every six minutes, but I didn't think the Baron would be called in that quickly to the episode.
Right out of the game.
But fact three, Satan's first appearance is in a 1677 poem called Paradise Lost.
Up until this point, Satan had no set representation or form that had been established.
Wait, Milton invented the concept of the Satan?
It was in a poem.
Satan's first appearance is in a 1677 poem.
called Paradise Lost.
But her to reign in hell than serve in heaven.
Other to this point, Satan had no set representation or form that had been established.
But what about the guy in the desert that was talking to Jesus and being like, hey, man, like,
this could all be yours.
Move on.
Tell that story about you and when you're a wee land.
In the Garden of Eden wasn't that same?
the Barnes & Noble
would carry the Satanic Bible
in like a little
like pocket version
it was weird
I would just go in there
and just like
thumb through it to see what it said
It's interesting
I got the nine tenets of Satanism
here the nine satanic statements
and it's not the dumbest religion in the world
I've heard worse
Let's see
I can't remember which one I said last
All right we'll skip that one
Oh, daughter Babylon, you devastated.
Devastator.
What was that?
I can't remember what the last one.
Oh, it was, um.
Was it the gods of wisdom defiled?
It was the one after the chariot, the iron chariot.
The gods of wisdom defiled have had their saga and their millennium has become a reality.
Each with his own divine path to paradise hath accused the other heresies and spiritual indiscretions.
That's satanic Bible.
Satan.
Two for Satan.
Two for Satan.
Two for Satan.
You boys know your satanic Bible.
Nice.
I just know my Bibles.
All of them, huh?
In general.
To ensure the destruction of an enemy, you must destroy them by proxy.
They must be shot, stab, burn, smashed, drowned, or rent.
That's going to be an old school Bible.
I'm going to say old school Bible on that one.
That sounds like something that the Bible would say.
Does, right?
Yeah.
I'm going to say Satanic.
Well, the guy's killing it over here.
You getting blown away.
We even keeping squibble.
I don't think so.
This is just for fun.
I think I got one more.
One more?
Then we're going to bring in
the overkill maestro is here to celebrate episode 666.
As it should be.
As it should be.
It's been over a year for the overkill maestro too.
Has it really?
It's been a year?
Since the overkill meister appeared.
Yeah.
Really?
I think so.
Maybe.
That could be wrong.
The baron's time isn't the same as man's time.
Yeah, that's true.
Time goes really fast, man.
Or Gettem's time, apparently.
Everybody has a different fucking pocket watch in this office.
Yeah, mine was I got here at 2 o'clock today because I thought we were going at 2, not 5.30.
You've been here this old time?
No, no, no, no, I went back home.
It was long enough that I'm like, I'm not going to see here.
I'll get him goes to the buffet.
This last one.
Oh, daughter Babylon, you devastator, happy shall they be who pay you back for what you have done to us?
Happy shall they be who take your little ones and dash them against the rocks.
Yes.
Babylon's.
Come on,
Q.
Babylon's is the key word there.
Yeah, that's got to be the original Bible.
Psalm 137, 8 through 9.
Yep.
Talking about paying back the harlots and sinners and smashing their little kids against rocks.
Pretty weird.
Pretty, why would you want to do that?
Why would you be like?
Smash a little kid against a rock to teach the sinners a lesson.
Yeah.
What do they value more than their children?
You charge for sex, so I'm going to bash your baby's head against the rock.
rock.
It seems a little like.
Tit for tat.
Yeah.
You know what the deal is?
That's the baron's playing
words too, tit.
Nice.
Babylon also means tits.
Yeah.
The Babylon's, she's got nice
Babylon's.
Is that a euphemism?
What?
Is that a euphemism?
No, that's not euphemism.
That's just like you got nice titties.
Where do they say that?
I don't know.
Barron never says it out loud.
He only thinks it.
I'll give a Babylon on this.
So I have the nine satanic statements.
We'll see how many of you agree with, how many you agree with.
All right.
Okay, number one, well, Satan represents indulgence instead of abstinence.
I think that that is something that the Satanic Bible does advocate for.
Yeah, I agree.
It does.
I mean, but do you agree with the statement?
Oh.
Yeah, like would you take indulgence over abstinence?
Do you indulge yourself, Q?
Yeah.
I'd rather do that.
I'd rather indulge myself than abstain.
Yeah.
I'd rather prove to myself I can abstain.
To yourself or anybody else?
To everybody.
Everybody?
Yeah.
Look at me.
Who knows?
Yeah.
Look what I'm not doing.
Get a load of this.
Nothing here to see.
Oh, it's time for a fact.
The New Jersey devil.
are the only professional sports team with devil in their name.
The Tampa Bay Rays dropped the word devil from their name in 2007.
Nice.
You think just for abbreviations or for brevity's sake,
or do you think they got some shit?
I'm sure they had heard enough.
I'd be like, you guys should change the name in Tampa.
Big Bible thumping state, Florida.
I don't know if you knew that.
I didn't know that.
I wasn't aware of that.
You didn't know that?
There are a lot of old people down there, though, so it would make sense.
I guess.
I love Florida.
Yeah, we don't go to church when we're there.
You know what?
Can you, instead of doing it every six minutes, let's change it to every 15 minutes now.
You don't have enough facts to get me through.
By the end, we're down once an hour.
I really thought I was getting roped in.
It'd be right after Tom.
Okay.
Number two, Satan represents vital existence instead of
spiritual pipe dreams.
So they say, live your life.
Don't worry about what's coming after because it ain't common.
Do we agree with it?
Is that what the question is?
Well, yeah, the question is like, which do you agree with?
Yeah, do you agree with any of these satanic statements?
I agree with nothing, Satanic.
Nothing?
Nothing.
It has the word Satan in it.
Why would anybody agree with it?
Some of these make sense, though.
What is it again?
Because it sounded all right to me.
Satan represents vital existence instead of a spiritual.
pipe dreams.
Yeah.
I think there's a way to balance both, to be
honest. I think there's a third path
there. You know, you could still
have fun and not cause
horrible damage
or soul-staining behavior,
don't you think? Could, yeah.
But I mean, I think what they're getting at
here is that they're like, live your life, don't worry
about what's coming out.
What would you, on the brown spectrum
queue, how soiled is?
your soul, you think.
It's like a mold tan, or is it?
No, my soul's pure.
It's pure white? You ever see that
the living body exhibit where
they show the smokers' lungs, throat black and shit?
That's what it is.
No, man, you know, that's the thing.
You ask for forgiveness and you get it.
Your soul is washed clean.
It's nice. That's the perk of being a Catholic.
So you just get to do what you want to do
and you got this gigantic eraser that just makes everything go away.
If you're just like, I'm sorry.
Yeah.
What are we going to do?
As I understand it.
So you fuck up the next time, I mean, if you forget this again.
As I've been playing the game, that's how it's done.
Forget it next time.
Yeah.
Chief.
It is a nice out-of-jail free card, though.
It is.
Yeah.
Go to confession, a couple of hell-marries.
And I think as you get older, too, like you start worrying about dying.
So you start like, all right, I'm sorry.
I'll do the straight
now or a little bit more now
from here on.
Some turbulence in the plane,
you're like,
I swear God,
I'll be a better person.
Oh, yeah.
That turbulence is great for fucking
getting you back to Jesus.
Okay,
well,
the next couple of them.
But you can't spend your life telling me
that the man loves me
and,
and forgives me anything.
And,
you know,
I'm,
I'm his son and all that stuff
and then not,
you know,
I got to believe it.
I think he,
but I think it's,
It all comes down to how legitimate the, I'm sorry is, you know.
He knows.
Yeah.
I certainly am sorry for anything I've done that might cause me trouble.
Yeah.
Up to an including this moment.
Now your slate's clean.
You hear that?
That's the sound of a giant eraser, erasing out all those sins.
Walt, Satan represents undefiled wisdom instead of hypocritical self-deceit.
surely you agree with that.
No, not an...
No?
No way.
You'd rather be guilty of hypocritical self-deceit?
You don't seem like that kind of guy.
Yeah, but seems like this wisdom, though, is built on a deck of cards, though.
It's about to collapse, though.
It's like, it's wisdom that you think you're wiser than God.
You're wiser than the Bible, though.
You know, you make your own little, you know, all of a sudden that there's three paths.
I don't remember.
When was the third path introduced?
Come on.
What are you doing over there?
What are you doing on God's path?
Okay, surely you can agree with this one, Walt.
Satan represents kindness to those who deserve it instead of love wasted on ingrates.
He's saying you can't love everyone.
I know, but God's message is way more.
It's harder, but that makes it more.
The people at the post office, for instance.
Right, I know.
You have to love them.
You have to love that woman.
I do love it.
My one guy, man, he's awesome.
I'll get him a big check.
So giving it to someone who deserves it.
That's the Satanic way.
Yeah, I think it's
I think it's easier
to be kind to people who deserve it
than it is to.
I think that's the test though.
That's the test that he put forth to you.
Can you be kind to those
who aren't kind to you?
Nope.
Well, you know, right.
Satan.
Okay, well, Satan represents vengeance
instead of turning the other chief.
And we all have that vengeance in our heart.
But that's why we are born with sin, though.
So it's, yeah, so then you have somebody telling you, you're like, oh, yeah, your vengeance is, it's justified.
And you deserve to get your eye for an eye because you were wronged.
Yeah.
That's, that's the serpent with his long, slippery tongue slipping it into your ear and tickling your ear.
Hello, Satan.
don't be a pussy.
Don't let him get away with it.
What are you?
A sucker.
A sucker?
A sucker.
Okay, this one will time.
You cuck.
I know he's going to agree with this one.
Satan represents responsibility to the responsible
instead of concern for psychic vampires who don't answer their phones.
Well, if what if you're, if you're, I can't just single out get him.
I mean, I'm surrounded by psychic vampires.
and I have to
I have to try to love them
as if they weren't psychic vampires
As if it was your job
They feed off my energy
Like fucking relentlessly
Sucking it away
A devilish mosquito
Satan represents man as just another animal
Sometimes better
More often worse than those who
walk on all fours, who because of his divine spiritual development has become the most vicious
animal of all.
I might be a Satanist.
I think I'm a Satanist.
Yeah.
It's possible.
I'm a Satanus.
Yeah.
I see how awful people become when they get too religious.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yes.
We think, Walt, we're just another animal who's made probably worse than the rest of the
animals?
Are we just another animal?
Yeah, that's worse than the other animals.
He made us in his image, though.
Why would we're not just another animal.
Like granted us free will.
He granted us way more than other animals.
Well, we took it from them, the other animals, right?
Why?
Well, we used them for food.
We used them for clothing.
They were put there for a reason, though.
So it says in the Bible?
Yeah.
Okay.
I think it does actually.
Don't they say like,
yeah, like give you dominion over the fucking ass and the, yeah.
Yeah, that ass.
Gas master.
To the brown.
It's in the Bible.
Look at those Babylon.
All right.
I'm talking to you.
You, Q.
Me.
Satan represents all of the so-called sins as they all lead to physical,
mental, or emotional gratification.
Oh, I don't know that every sin leads to good things.
That's kind of nuts.
Murder?
I don't even want to hurt anybody.
That's a big deal.
I don't even like lying.
I don't like.
Yeah, I don't think I don't like deceiving.
Do you like coveting your neighbor's ass, which, uh, yeah, that I do.
That, I, that part I like.
Sometimes it's translated to neighbor's wife, but neighbor's ass, I think was your OG.
I mean, there have been times where it's been the neighbor's wife, but I'm the same.
And not for a long time and not anymore, but I was, you know, I was out in the warm weather
recently walking around and everybody in L.A., you know, dresses very, you know, dress is very.
Dress like it's warm.
Yeah, and it dress like it's warm.
And it was, it was wonderful to sit there and, and covet.
Comet that shit, man.
I'm just sitting there.
If you can abide by every single, all 10 commandments.
I mean, I'm not trying to do it.
I'm not going up to him.
You know, you're just like, hey.
Is there from a distance?
That's all.
There's nothing wrong with that.
I'm an old man.
Give it to us.
Just let it fucking.
Let it fly.
What are you doing?
I'm not even saying anything.
I was just sitting there behind sunglasses so nobody could see my eyes.
I don't hurt anybody
They can see your mouth though
Wide open like flies flying in and out of it
You're looking at me for
How come they're allowed to look at me
But I'm not allowed to look at anybody else
Let's see
Last one
Satan has been the best friend
The church has ever had
As he has kept it in business all these years
I mean you do need a good nemesis
Gotta have them
There can be no evil without good
and vice versa.
That's the only compliment I'll give the devil.
Yeah.
He's the ultimate nemesis.
But there is no finer villain.
But isn't it all God's plan?
It's got to be all God's plan.
He's infallible.
So Satan rebelling and doing all the shenanigans have got to be part of the plan.
So why does Satan get in a bad fucking rap?
He's just fulfilling a role that he was setting.
Yeah.
It's beyond our ability to comprehend.
You can't even begin to question the grand plan.
No, I wasn't questioning.
I had faith in the grand plan.
I'm like, it's all part of the grand plan.
And design.
Now, Satan's back in a big, bad way in current news.
I mean, everything I read about Epstein's files,
it's like everybody's in a satanic pedophile ring in Hollywood.
And not only that, they're like the Super Bowl, the halftime shows are evidently like Satanic as well.
The Olympics had satanic imagery in it too.
Not this, not this.
I don't know about this one with the previous one in the summer, the summer Olympics.
So he is back in the news.
I've got to be honest with you.
Yeah.
Satan from the 70s.
It's way cooler.
This is Satan.
It's just like with kids and shit.
I don't like that.
Yeah.
That's not the Satan I was like that I got into and wanted to rock out to.
You want the guy with the cloven feet.
Yeah.
Yeah, no, he's making some kids smoke pot in the woods.
Yeah, like that's...
This new updated, rebooted Satan is really harsh.
Yeah, it's fucked up, man.
Or is it?
No one's getting arrested.
Oh, Prince Alan just got arrested today.
Oh, yeah, Prince Andrew got arrested.
Oh, yeah.
Andrew, I mean...
Really, they got evidence against him.
They got, like, they nail him to the wall?
They're nailing his ass.
Oh, good.
Let's start getting some people in fucking here in the States.
Like, has anybody in the United States coming?
Oh, it's coming.
Good.
Once you get a royal, you can get after anybody.
You would thought they were untouchable.
Good.
Fucking bring them all down.
I agree.
Bring them all down.
The baron will dance, a jig on all of their downfalls.
All of them.
Yeah.
I'm going to knock these ads out so that we...
It is funny that I heard that like,
Whoopi Goldberg's mentioned in at once.
Oh, yeah.
Like, some charity thing.
Like it wasn't like, she wasn't like...
She was at the island.
She wasn't like that.
It was literally like something and her name was mentioned in an email.
Which is great because all they did was talk about the Epstein list and who was on at the
view.
She's like Wumpies on it.
It's so fucking hard to believe.
I like Wumpy's man.
Jackie the Jokeman's on it too.
Is he really?
Yeah.
I guess he had dinner with him one time and then he sent to, Jackie sent him an email saying like,
hey, would you, he didn't know about his, I don't think he knew about his past.
He said, hey, would you like to invest in a comedy club in Las Vegas?
I'm thinking about starting.
Okay.
I don't think he ever answered it or something.
It's not like they had direct contact.
Let's see.
I'll knock out these ads.
Harry's.
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But your razor cue?
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Yeah, I can see it from here, yeah.
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Yeah, a little makeover of sorts.
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What's that?
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Do you saw that thing that talks to you through your phone?
Just have that to be talking.
Yeah.
I don't know.
And the one guy that I do go to that I actually like talking to is like an hour and a half away.
Yeah, it's brutal.
Yeah, my guy is Italian, speaks in a very heavy Italian accent, plus the music's cranking.
He talks, I'm like, I can't understand a fuck of a word you're saying.
Every once in a while, I'm like, oh, yeah?
Yeah.
Hell yeah, yeah.
Soccer playing on TV.
Yeah, yeah, exactly.
My plan was to lose enough weight that I could shave the beer for a new season.
Really?
So far it has not gone.
You're going to go baby-faced?
I would have liked to, but the clock's really running.
out on that time before, you know, it slides camera action. So I don't know if I can do it anymore.
You would probably look 18. Yeah? I think so. You think, huh? I think I really do. I'm not fucking around.
You would look like, you would look like, like a time traveler, like, you know, season one Q just came out of nowhere.
Do you think I can lose like 20 pounds in a month? Sure, you could do that. Oh, you can get really,
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What's that?
Hire me a personal trainer.
Right.
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Then I'll do a commercial where it's like Harry's blade.
Oh, here we go.
Oh, that's what I forgot.
The phrase,
Angel in the Kitchen, devil in the bedroom,
refers to the toxic Madonna whore complex.
The concept where woman is expected to be pure and nurturing in one aspect of her life,
yet a sexually voracious imp in another.
What's wrong with that?
Lady in the streets, freak in the sheets.
Yeah, what's wrong with that?
That's in the Bible.
Because it's toxic.
How's it toxic?
You've got to be Martha Stewart when you're out in the kitchen,
but you've got to be some sort of porno star when you're in a bedroom with me.
Yeah.
What's the problem here?
I literally don't understand that.
It's not calculating.
It sounds like wife material.
right there.
No?
Wife her up.
Yeah.
Put a ring on that.
I mean, what's the alternative?
Like, someone who can't cook, doesn't want to cook and also sucks in bed?
Like, why would I, why would I celebrate that at all?
But she had a great personality, though.
Sure she does.
Great.
We could fucking text each other.
I think, look, I think he goes the other way again.
I think if a woman was to say, like, I want a guy that knows how to cook and is great in bed.
I wouldn't be like, that's toxic.
Oh, yeah, like, where's this Prince Charming at then, I'd say.
That he's all, he meets all.
Yeah, he didn't put his hand up.
They're out.
Can I show you my cyst again?
Sorry to interrupt that Harry's commercial.
That's okay.
Harry's understand.
Make it, make the next one, 20 minutes.
We're going to go for, cue, tonight.
The goal is to get to six hours and 66 minutes this episode.
Seven hours and six minutes?
Yeah.
You're going to get home around five a hand today.
We've just got a, we got to vamp five hours.
Let's see.
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Okay.
It's one down.
Nice.
Let's see.
The next one, perfect jeans.
Jeans?
Have we done these guys before?
We've never had jeans before.
Yeah.
Thank fucking God.
I haven't brought a pair of jeans since I had those Sassoon's in sixth grade.
Yeah, you need them.
I know.
Quickly get them.
Is there a barren fact to interrupt him shitting on jeans?
No, I didn't shit on it.
I said I have a
good pair of jeans
since my sassoons
and my jordash.
Well,
okay,
this is a great first question
for you then.
What do you hate about jeans?
Because you don't wear them.
What do you hate about?
Do I hate about them?
The,
um,
how they,
they,
they constrict my leg movements.
I feel like I'm wearing a denim's
straight jacket at times.
Okay.
I don't like how tight they go around my fucking waist.
But I think that's more of a me problem.
Uh, let's see.
Are there any pain points order?
jeans online. Sure there are. You never know if like, you know, they're going to fit, you know,
you got to return them. Do they fit like a glove and already broken in out of the box?
Do they take returns? Sometimes I've ordered jeans and they're like, sorry, we don't do returns.
These are on sale or whatever. These guys do returns. Yeah. They're perfect. Yeah. Perfect. Yeah.
Let's see. Why did you decide to try the perfect gene? And I can be honest because they paid me
to try them. Did they send this any? They sent me a pair. Your pairs are still on the way.
Way to Christ.
But how do they even know what size I am?
Because I have to send you the thing.
I just got them.
The page that tells you your size.
Oh, okay.
All right.
I'll send a talent.
Send it to hell.
Yeah, yeah.
She's on top of everything.
Did I look good in them?
Did my wife compliment my ass pets?
I got to be honest.
I got to keep it real.
The Ozmpic took away one of the one of your better features, though.
Your hinky was fucking hot.
Yeah.
I'm losing weight everywhere, but.
She was too distracted singing songs about Norm.
Yeah.
Oh, dude, it's not stop.
It's not stop.
I don't know how much longer I can take it.
And the thing about these genes are they have a stretch to them.
So they're not going to constrict you, Walt.
Love it.
I love that.
Like the straight jackets.
The rise of the stretch jeans is one of the best parts of modern civilization.
Yeah, I've got a couple pairs and they, I know what Walt's talking about that.
Heavy denim dungery feeling.
Yeah.
Bunches up.
Yeah.
Not with perfect jeans.
And what price would you typically pay?
Now, Ming Chen's going to pay 400 bucks or something.
He's getting custom lined pockets.
He's getting...
It's crazy what he's over there doing.
He's out.
It's out there.
The perfect gene is good.
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Do they come in bell bottoms?
Hold on a second.
I'll let you know.
Not sure.
Unlikely.
Unlikely they have bell bottoms or low-rise.
I don't want low-rise jeans to come back.
Oh, I thought they were coming back.
Are they coming back?
I thought like the 90s are back.
The 90 early aughts.
You don't have any hips anymore.
How are you going to keep your low-rise is up?
You got nothing here.
You're like a pole.
It just falls right down here.
Put on a really tight belt.
You look like one of those old men on America's Funniest Home videos dancing at a wedding.
How did that happen?
Oh, my perfect jeans fell again.
Honey.
Help me with my jeans.
I'm on the ground.
How did this happen to me?
How did I get here?
What was me?
Whoa.
What was me?
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That's great.
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As much as they say it, as much as the fat acceptance and all that other shit.
Oh, body positivity's out, isn't it?
I thought it's all.
I hope so.
Yeah.
Shouldn't be positive about that.
I'm certainly not positive about my body.
Why the fuck should anybody else be positive about theirs?
Really?
Like, if you can maintain a realistic view of, like, how you look,
why can't you maintain that same realistic view of how other people look?
I don't know.
I think you can.
Yeah?
Sure, who's going to stop you?
Let's do it.
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Why fat?
Someone called?
I don't know.
You guys literally want to go six hours and 66 minutes.
I thought.
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Yep.
Just answer with a picture of boot show.
Who is this?
Why are you, contact me so late?
Yeah, like the after midnight booty call, that's got to be a thing of the past, right?
For me?
Yeah.
Oh, yeah, that's the thing of the past.
I, you know, I had my fun with that.
Yeah.
I don't know that it's over forever, but I'm definitely.
It's going to take somebody special to answer that call, right?
Yeah.
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nice all right now the uh the maestro come and sit with us now that we've got to all our stuff
now in the past and i've been guilty of it too and one of the things i read a lot though is
i think tom has this great comes in with these great things but then he may be
stretches a little bit too long and he goes on too long.
So he's only telling one overkill fact
tonight. Okay. Yeah.
So I told him to pick his best
devilish, overkill fact.
But it's six hours and six
six months long. To tell it?
Yes.
Hello, fellas. How are you doing?
How are you doing, bud? Oh, wonderful.
What did you last time you were on? Oh, yeah, it's Tom.
I actually looked it up. For overkill,
it was October 7th,
2024.
Whoa. Over a year.
Over a year.
How the fuck is that possible?
It seems like it was just like a month or two ago.
You guys got lots of stuff.
Don't you see me on a Sunday, Jeff show.
Yeah, that's true.
Yeah.
Now, it's been over a year.
Have you been, has it gone that long?
Have you been pitching Walt on overkill ideas?
Have you been trying to get things through and not getting them through?
Or have you just been waiting by the phone?
Oh, waiting by the phone.
That's it.
No, we have so many other, like, Patreon things that, uh, yes and I asked me.
Took on a big responsibility.
If I were you, I'd be like maybe presenting a, you know, presenting a, you know, I, I, I, I, I,
And I love you, but I'm not saying this is criticism.
I'm just saying, like, maybe you should be more proactive about overkill.
Oh, I'm proactive.
I have, like, four other games for the regular TES date.
But as far as overkill, he doesn't really want to hear him all, though.
But what's your overkill title?
The Maestro.
That's what I'm saying.
I don't get to just pick when I get to come in, though.
You haven't even tried.
Like, you got it, you got to be like, I got ideas.
I got overkill ideas.
I've shot him a couple.
Oh, so you have?
Yes.
Oh, okay.
I was kidding about the Twain by the phone.
Got you, got it.
Okay.
So, well, why have you been killing his ideas?
is. Well, if no one remembers the last time I was even on, so I don't know if it really matters.
If we're like, oh, it's been like, oh, it must be less than a year. And we're like, oh,
it's been a year. And really no one was like, hey, where's Tom been? Right. I do see calls for
overkill, but not specifically mentioning Tom. I think I may open up the, and make it a more of a
bi-annual title. Okay. Open up the tournament again. So other people can compete for the
overkill maestro title of it like every other year like you only hold it for so long like it's
like a championship belt oh i have to like come back and defend it do i get like push to the the finals
already do i get a buy at least okay now what about people who have lost in the past like will
rogers is he allowed to try again or is it open to anybody who really takes on all comers
but part of it i would like to be like a plan for going forward like i think we should add that in
like they got to have some vision for overkill five year plan
man.
It's coming from the guy who's like, we can never fucking schedule anything because
Q when you're coming in.
And then it's so hard to schedule Tom because we never know you're going to be here.
He goes, but we don't know when Q's coming in.
Literally a half hour ago before you got you, they texted home.
You name the last time you've been like, I need a date that I haven't gotten you a date.
This is true.
But for when the like kind of like a normal episode where I don't like, I don't want to harass
you, but like, Hugh, need dates, need dates.
Right.
I only do this for episodes that are satanic.
nature or celebratory numbers.
Yeah.
Otherwise,
I'm wondering if it goes after him for the normal
episodes.
Yeah.
You ever notice?
I never text you for a normal episode.
I don't even answer when Brian's like,
hey, boys,
when we get together.
I'm just like,
when Q answers,
that I'll answer.
That's what I figured.
I'm not even weighing in.
He's it don't matter.
But the time is here now.
The maestro is here.
And I'm not really
whatever.
Conduct the symphonies of sinister
fucking devilish.
Well, just one fact.
Let's hope.
Yes.
All right. This one has a lot, though. It's got sex, debauchery, the devil, everything you ask for.
In 1632, in the quiet walled town of Loden, France, something began screaming behind the covenant doors.
The Ursuline nuns said it started with whispers in the dark, footsteps and empty corridors,
presence at the edge of the bed, then the dreams.
Sister Agnes, the priores claimed that at night a shadow entered her chamber, not just a faceless spirit,
but a man she recognized, the local priest, urban grain deer, except it wasn't him.
He was accompanied by demons.
And the demons had names.
Asmodius, Zebulon, Izacaron, all demons of lust and deception.
They said these entities tormented them at night, climbing into their beds, pressing on their bodies, whispering obscenities in their ear.
They described divisible hands touching them all over their bodies.
They said they woke breathless, pinned by something they could not see.
And it didn't stop in the private.
During prayer, the nuns began to convulse.
One would arch backwards unnaturally.
One would drop to the floor, writhing in pain.
Witnesses described eye-rolling white, teeth grinding, limbs jerking violently.
They howled.
They barked like animals.
They hissed at the priests.
Then came the voices.
In the deep guttural tones that didn't sound like their own, they screamed.
screamed blasphemy in the chapels.
They screamed explicit accusations.
They cried out that Grandier had sent the demons and that he made a pact with hell.
Exorcisms followed and they became public spectacles.
Crowds packed in, priests held up crucifixes and shouted Latin prayers.
And the nuns screamed back at them.
Some tore their habits.
Some exposed themselves in chaos.
No.
Tort.
What does that mean?
Tort.
Oh, Tor.
Oh, Tor.
Yes.
Okay.
Okay.
Some exposed themselves in the chaos.
Witnesses wrote...
Look at those Babylon's!
Witnesses wrote that they made obscene gestures during their rights,
thrusting their hips,
mocking the clergy,
contorting violently.
Oh, I thought you were done.
The maestro's just reading a Wikipedia article.
No, no, no.
It's longer than that.
It's longer than now.
The perfect gene spot.
Well, this is your whole one.
Trying to make my voice counts.
Why I only get one?
once a year.
All right.
I thought you'd be a little bit more charismatic and kind of like when you, like, you're,
you're the nun.
I do.
Oh,
you want me to start helping the table?
No,
no,
just like,
you know,
telling a story.
All right,
I'll wrap it up a little bit faster.
Yeah,
yeah.
So what happened was they started performing more exorcisms.
And as they proceeded,
they convinced themselves that this priest made a deal with the devil.
And they actually,
they forced confessions out of the nuns.
And there was actually a contract that was written between the priest and the devil that he would get virgin women, these nuns, for the rest of his lives.
So what they did is they tortured the priest until he confessed, which I never did, the other inquisitors of the church.
The Vatican?
Yes.
What year was this?
1632.
The Vatican has weighed in on this and they say this actually happened?
Yes, plenty of accounts of this.
So what they did is they actually they tortured him in the worst possible way they could in France, which was they put his feet in wooden stocks.
And they would put blocks in between them, crushing his femur and his ankles and everything until all the bones inside of it snapped.
But he never once said that he made this deal with the devil.
They convicted him.
He was burned at the stake.
The possessions kept happening for about a year or two until finally they quieted down.
Getham, did you want to show a picture with the contract?
So while during one of the exorcisms,
they actually got drawings of what the contract looked like.
Whoa.
Written backwards in Latin.
And if anyone's looking for it, it's the Ludin.
What is it, Luden exorcism?
I think fucking Gidim needs a looting.
He's fucking coughing all over the fucking story.
Are you two fighting?
Gidim has not looked at you.
You have not a...
Because I fucking called out
that he didn't fucking have the thunderstitch.
As you can see,
it's written in backwards and in Latin
with various symbols
that were drawn during the exorcism.
And those are demon signatures?
Yes.
One of them is Absalon.
I think it's the one at the bottom.
And then the other ones are just various demons
that possessed the women
and had sex with them.
It's funny that demons have
emojis.
Yeah, right?
Almost.
Where do you stand, Maestro?
Well, do you believe this story, or do you believe it to be a big mass hysteria?
So, interestingly enough, there's another overkill part to it that's conspiracy.
Oh, please.
We don't have time for this.
No, no, it's quick.
He's going to get here.
He's got the mic.
He's not giving it up easy.
We didn't even get to another bear in fact.
The clock has any minute.
20 yet.
This particular priest had spoken against celibacy in the church and was actually advocating
for a priest to be able to have sex and was actually starting to gain momentum.
So people said that all this possession was actually not true and that they tortured and
killed him just to keep the religion in mind.
Just to stop themselves from getting laid?
Yes.
They didn't like it.
Do you know how religious you got to be to do that?
Well, because the whole thing is that like you don't get married and that you have to
that anything you have gets donated to the church,
so they don't want you to get married.
How can we keep them in line?
How do we keep them in line?
I know.
Take away pussy.
What else are they going to do?
Nothing bad could come on that.
Wow.
Thoughts, Brian?
About this?
Well, I've heard of a nun hysteria before,
so I quickly Googled it.
And there's several different instances of it.
So I think that, I mean, I believe it.
Do you believe it?
Oh, yeah.
I mean, do I believe that there was real demon possession?
That probably not.
Do I believe it was mass hysteria?
Oh, yeah.
Especially in the 1600s.
It was right around one of the ends of the plague in France.
So I'm sure a lot of craziness kind of seeped into everything.
And that was back on the day when people really, like, got off, like, their entertainment was watching other people get tortured or killed or maimed or whatever.
And they definitely did.
They said you could hear the cracks down the street.
of as they put the pieces of wood in the slats that would break the bones in all of his legs.
Fucking wild,
they never made it really fair to like when you're like admitting something,
like the dunking in Salem,
like when they used to dunk witches,
it's like,
well,
if she drowns,
she's a witch.
She doesn't,
or if she doesn't drown,
she's a witch or she drowns,
I guess she's all right.
Yeah.
Damned if you do,
damned if you don't situation on that one.
Yeah.
It takes a special fucked up person to be able to torture another person.
especially so brutally.
Yeah.
For something that you're like,
like, look,
if somebody did something to sage and I like have this guy tied up in my basement.
Yeah.
Who knows what's going to have?
I mean,
I still think you wouldn't be like,
I want to get my hand.
Like shots of the brain.
Yeah.
Right.
But like you want to sit there and fucking torture a human?
Like,
I don't know,
man.
I don't know.
You know what I do that old,
that old,
like,
Persian torture where they would like put a guy's feet in stock to put salt all over the
souls of his feet.
Then they would let goats lick his feet until all the skin came off.
You could see bone.
Jesus Christ.
People are really creative when it comes to life.
Sure.
There's more they feed you honey and put you in a boat until, like, you eventually, like, throw up on yourself.
And then the bugs would come and eat you inside out.
Oh, shit.
Oh.
Just in time.
Led Zeppelin's stairway to heaven is perhaps the most infamous song to feature satanic backwards masking.
It is alleged to contain backwark.
MASSADES PRAzing Satan.
What do you mean allege?
Can we just, can we just play it backwards?
People hear different things, you know.
I see.
You know, people interpret the backwards masking as like, some people are like, oh, my God, they just praise Satan.
And you hear like, I don't hear that.
I remember playing that record backwards and here, at least I thought I heard it.
My sweet Satan.
Yeah.
But like once they tell you what it says, it's much easier to be.
Oh, yeah, that is what it says.
The power of fucking like suggestion.
Are there any albums that it's like confirmed that they're like, yeah, we did back.
Oh, yeah.
They did it on purpose.
Yeah.
We did it.
Didn't we do it on the vinyl?
Yeah, okay.
What did it say when you went backwards?
I forget.
TSD is the shark, maybe.
I don't remember.
Huh.
Should have been TSD is the shark.
Yeah.
So this is the backmasking of stairway to heaven.
Here's my sweet Satan.
Are we certain that's legitimate?
That's not just something made to get views on YouTube, though?
Wow.
Who knew?
Sounds pretty close to what the lyrics.
Yeah, it was pretty dead on.
But think about the trouble you got to go through to write something that would sit.
Yeah.
But think of the impact.
has on teenagers who are like, I must have that album.
Yeah.
I know I dug it more because of it.
Oh, yeah.
Absolutely.
Okay, myestro, you're done.
That's it.
You can stick around.
We're going to play a very satanic game.
And I'm about to read something to the fellas here.
Okay.
About to play a game.
Is that a fact or is it the game?
I just thought it would give some
Gravians.
Gabiast.
Do it.
The devil you think you know, I'm going to bring in three men who claim to have been tormented by a demon for over a month.
Twenty years ago, for reasons they will go into, they started referring to themselves as God.
Soon after this, they were haunted and attacked by a demonic presence.
Several incidents include TVs turning on by themselves with only static screens, pictures moving.
doors slamming, hearing voices, and being choked into unconsciousness.
These attacks only stopped after they begged God for help,
and they pronounced that they were not God.
Your task will be to ask questions of each person I bring in and pick who really danced with the devil.
The segment is called two regular guys and one wacko.
Hugh, you're playing for Kevin Pinoe on Twitter.
All right, Kevin.
I got you.
Brian Johnson is playing for Emily Craig on Twitter,
and we will announce what they win,
which one of you guess is correctly.
Sure.
If you both guess correctly,
they both are going to win a price.
All right.
I'm about to bring in our dancers with the devil.
Okay.
The devil dancers.
It sounds like they just came from a strip club.
So this is three people plus Tom?
Tom is here.
He can,
he can weigh in,
but he's not really playing.
But he has a great line.
He wants to spit in.
A zinger.
The maestro is at,
is more than capable of dropping some funny fucking bombs.
Yes, sir.
No matter what Bennett says.
We haven't heard any so far.
He's capable.
I'm waiting for my 10th year anniversary in trouble.
No matter what it says.
We can while we're waiting.
Yeah.
What do we got?
Another,
another commercial?
No, not another commercial, but something going back to what Tom was talking about.
Historical key cases involving nuns, like crazy nuns.
It was the meowing nuns of France.
In a medieval French convent, one nun began meowing like a cat leading others to join in for hours.
Behavior only ceased when soldiers threaten them with a whipping.
There's a threat of this kind of shit with the nuns.
The biting mania in the 15th century, a nun in Germany started biting other sisters,
spreading the mania to other convents in Germany.
the Netherlands in Rome.
The behavior was eventually stopped through threats of floggings.
I mean, it just seems like the only way to keep society in line is by fucking...
Whip their ass, yeah.
Everybody gets a whipping once in a while.
The Devils of London, entire convent in France reportedly exhibited signs of demonic possession.
A case famously analyzed in literature.
Oh, not London, Luden.
Sorry, or Loudon. I don't know how you pronounce it.
That was the Luden. Loudon was the one that I was talking about.
Oh, that's one you were talking about?
Yeah.
Okay.
And then the last one is the all-girls.
school in Lily somewhere, 50 to 95 students were believed devils were flying around their heads
and confessed to witchcraft.
Like, can you imagine, like, you go back to sailing, like we were talking about, you know,
you're one of these people who gets accused by little girls, be like, uh, witch.
Yeah.
And a lot of it, they say was like, because it's like they wanted to get other people's property
and shit, you know, or they had like something against the person or the person was just a little bit
weird, like it was like some old hag.
It was their early version of canceled culture.
They were just like, he did this.
And then everybody was like, let's get him.
Let's get him.
Yeah.
Fucking.
No evidence.
Yeah.
Pitchforks and torches, man.
No, because like Brian said, the evidence is either if you are a witch, you drown or you don't drown and then they do something else to you.
Or you're not a witch and you're drowned.
You're like, oh, I guess she wasn't a witch.
It's such a horrible.
And you can't imagine how many times it happened.
Yeah.
I went to, I've been to Salem several times and I took a tour.
of like the underground jail that they used to have.
And they're like, if you have money, you have a decent size cell.
Now why I say decent, it's probably like about today's cells, you know, for jails.
And that's like if you had some money, it was like a slightly smaller cell.
But if you had no money, they had what was called a coffin cell.
And you literally stood up in what was about the size of a coffin.
You couldn't even sit down.
You couldn't squel.
Unless you were like pretty tiny.
Yeah.
I guess you could.
How long were you in there?
As long as they felt like you needed to be in there.
Like sometimes months.
You're just wishing for death at that point.
Yeah.
You know, yeah, the drowning is nothing.
Where are they?
Nobody's here.
All right, you guys, ready?
Ready, ready.
So our first alleged dancer with the devil,
please welcome to the table.
Brian a shell.
Oh, yeah.
Brian, Michelle.
Yes, sir.
All right.
Happy to see this gentleman.
Always good to see you.
Hard time believing he's danced with
with demons.
Why?
I don't know about this guy, though.
Because he's too...
He's got a lot of demons.
He's too normal.
He's too...
What was that?
Well, put together.
Demon in a bottle?
Yeah.
Very good, man.
There's a guy who spent seven...
Seven seasons on a comic book show.
Appreciate your image of me, bro.
Yeah, man.
I mean, shit.
Did you bring up Iron Man?
Yeah.
Wow.
Busting it out.
Our second...
Dancer with the devil.
Jimmy the hair guy.
Oh, boy.
Jimmy.
Jimmy the hair guy.
Back.
So soon we see him.
You're on the second chair.
This one.
Short one.
All right.
And our third.
Dancer with the devil.
Mr. Brian Rupert.
Oh, yeah.
Rubs here.
Dancer with the devil dogs.
Yeah, baby.
So one of these guys,
by knowing them all for years.
Nigh, decades, some of them.
I've never heard a demon story from,
they've been holding it inside.
I am here to tell you,
my only involvement with this is,
I asked him,
please, don't lie to me just to, just, you know,
please, this has to be legitimate.
And they came to me with tears in her eyes
to tell me this story.
Okay.
So I said,
Do I pick my guy?
Can I pick my guy?
But you guys are going to get questions.
Tears, you say.
to ask each individual to determine which of these men called themselves God 20 years ago and paid almost a horrific price,
if not for our Lord and Savior Jesus coming down and saving them.
Okay.
Two Jews.
Does everybody hear of Lord and Savior?
Well, if he saves your ass for you're fucked around and almost found out.
I don't think it matters if you're Jewish anymore.
All right, Brian, you want to kick off the questions?
Can you read one more time what happened to these guys?
Okay.
So the three men sitting in front of us, they claim to have been tormented by a demon for over a month.
One of them is telling the truth.
20 years ago, for reasons they will go into, they started referring to themselves as God.
Soon after this, they were haunted and attacked by a demonic presence.
or entity. Several incidents include TVs turning on by themselves with only static screens,
pictures moving, door slamming, hearing voices, and finally being choked into unconsciousness.
These attacks only stopped after begging God for help and pronouncing they were not God.
Your task is to ask questions of each person and then pick who really danced with the devil.
I don't know, slamming doors and choking people in some conscience. I feel like I might be a devil.
I feel like I might be possessed.
You guys need any help.
Okay.
I don't know.
Only if you want to use them.
Well, my first question all three would be, why did you proclaim yourself to be God, right?
Like, we kind of got to know that base level.
Like, how petty is this?
Right.
Transgression.
All right.
So that's 20 years ago.
Each day.
Yes.
Yeah, I'm 38.
Okay.
So you were 18, you were 17, and you would have been 30.
Roughly 30.
Yeah, but this was not exactly 20.
years ago. Okay. Okay. So why, why, to all of you, did you proclaim yourself, God?
Who do you want to go first? You don't go. Go ahead. So this was about 2010, so, you know,
a little under 30 years ago. TSD just fucking kicked off that year, didn't it? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Right around then.
Coincidence? I think there are no coincidence when it comes to the devil.
So, you know, I kind of had no direction.
I was going nowhere in life.
I always struggled with self-confidence.
And I was in a bit of a dry spell with the ladies.
And I was like, okay, I have no confidence.
The only thing I could do, you know, dumb 20-year-old thinking to boost myself is I have to throw it all the self-hatred in the complete opposite direction.
And if I keep gassing myself up to the ultimate degree, eventually I'll believe it and it will work and I'll get self-confidence again.
And it did work.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Calling yourself, God worked.
Yeah.
I completely like.
Even though a demon came and messed with you.
Eventually, when I recanted, it all crumbled.
But legit, everything was going my way, especially with the ladies, when I started doing that.
Just by claiming you were God.
I just had so much self-requent.
confidence. I wasn't doubted of myself. I was playing
everything great. Playing with Babylon's every night
of a week. Nice. Nice work.
I was in a nice stretch there.
Just so you guys know Babylon's is a euphemous for Tits.
You've never heard anybody call Tits Babylon's?
No. Oh, my God.
Neither have I don't think anyone. I think you made it up.
No, I didn't. I've heard it before. I think Ali G said it.
Oh, L.EG.
Yeah.
Jimmy?
Well, okay. So, uh, yeah,
around 20 years ago.
I fucked this super hot chick.
Way out of my league.
Story's bullshit already.
Isn't that every night for you?
He's doing that now.
And super fucking hot.
And she told me that nobody had ever
made her orgasm like I had before.
She becomes fucking like,
not just in love with me, like, obsessed with me.
Like fucking, like, really fucking, like,
falling my every move, like wants me, like,
So I end up fucking her friend
And
Like, you know
Figured, you know
We're not really
We're not together
You know what I mean
You're just hooking up whatever
She wants me all to her fucking self
Like she like threatens to cut my dick off
What about the friend?
She didn't threaten the friend?
No, she threatened me
And so I'm like,
All right like fuck it like
We can be together
Like call me God
Like you know
Start firming me as God
Like almost like a daddy thing
and she did.
And then it kind of got to my head a little bit.
And I started having my friends call me God and fucking it turned into a little bit of a fucking thing.
And eventually shit went south.
Who are these friends that agreed to call you God?
They didn't really, but I, I told.
I wanted them to.
I started referring myself to the third person and shit.
Like, it was a bad scene.
Okay.
And Michelle.
Okay.
I'll tell you exactly.
I'll tell you exactly when this happened.
It was.
Why did you call yourself God?
What's going on?
It was April 27th, 2011.
April 27th, 2011, and I was running storm chasers.
And I was out chasing what turned out to be called the super outbreak of 2011, which was the largest tornado outbreak ever recorded.
You were there?
I was there.
Wow.
Was that scary?
It was scary as hell.
Right.
And this was like our first week of chasing.
So like I'm a kid from Jersey.
I'm like, okay, I'm a little scared going on this show.
Like tornadoes, okay, I'd only seen them in movies, right?
Turns out our first week of chasing turns into what three days that became the largest tornado
outbreak in recorded history.
How close were you?
Very close.
In the bands.
And that's where the story comes from.
I mean, that day there was four EF-5s.
People could chase tornadoes their entire lives and never see one EF-5.
I was face-to-face with four that day.
Wow.
And at some point, we get, you know, trapped.
They were just too big.
So you think you have an out route wherever you're going.
You try to get as close to the storm chasers on camera as possible.
But at some point, we got boxed in, basically.
We couldn't move.
And we were stuck there with them.
And the storm chasers communicate over the radio with us.
So they're like, guys, brace yourselves.
This is going to hit us.
Jesus.
Right.
So we don't know if it's like the center of it,
the outer bands.
It turns out it's the outer band.
So for about, I don't even know, 30 seconds.
Is that the most dangerous part?
The out of the outer band is the outer edge of it.
So of an EF5, that's swirling at over 300 miles at hours.
Jesus.
So they tell us, brace yourselves, this is going to hit us.
And there's nothing you could do except put your head between your legs and kiss your ass goodbye.
So it is the loudest thing you could ever imagine.
You know, it's like.
How many people in the car?
four people in my car and we're like the chase vehicle.
All dudes?
All dudes.
Okay.
We're in a suburban, Chevy Suburban, and the big dominator is in front of us, you know, the big chase car.
And they, and they anchor down.
They sent spikes into the ground to not get moved.
It looks like a big turtle shell.
They didn't share that with you?
No, that was some, we didn't get that tech.
We got the Chevy Suburban.
This is what the Enterprise and got a Chevy's.
Exactly.
And so they tell us to, to brace ourselves.
It sounds like a million, a million freight trains are coming at you.
Jeez.
The loudest thing you've ever heard and your ears start popping and we're in it now.
And it's sliding the suburban all over the road.
And it's probably, I don't know, 30 seconds that feels like a million minutes.
Yeah.
Sliding, sliding, sliding.
And your ears pop and your fucking mouth is so dry.
It's just you're in zero pressure.
We're in it.
Okay.
We, it passes.
Those guys hop out.
They're stoked, the storm chasers.
They love this.
They loved it.
We all pop out.
The first thing Reed Timmer says to me, he goes, you guys just joined the zero miles
club, motherfucker.
I'm like, what's that?
He's like, you were zero miles away from that tornado.
You were in it, motherfucker.
And when my adrenaline just started like doing crazy things, I don't know if I was going
to pass out or what.
And I raised my hands in the air and I go, I'm a fucking.
God. And the guys start cracking up. And from then on, the rest of the shoot, when they called me in the car, on the walkies, it was God. It would be like, you know, Quinn to God, Quinn to God. It just became a big thing. And then I started referring to myself as God in the third person. I said, listen, God needs you guys to go here and there. And what's so funny is that Eric Duncan wasn't even on that show. Eric Duncan, who was on comic book with me, but he knew about it. So he started calling me God during C.
DM and I'm like, don't do it, don't do it.
Because the whole thing had happened.
So he was like, oh, what's up, God?
Or he'd say on the walkie talk, he'd dunk it for God.
And I'll be like, dude, don't do it.
And he never knew why I was getting so mad at him because that thing came back to haunt me,
literally.
Yeah.
Three stories, Brian, a varying believability.
Yeah.
You've got more questions, right?
We got lots of questions.
Yeah.
I gave you a little cheat-she in case you can't come up with any.
So what was the first, so back down, back down the line.
What was the first couple of incidents?
What was the one that made you realize that this was a demon in play?
Give us the build up to that incident and the one where you were like, oh, shit, man.
I have a demon issue.
Okay.
So I got to be clear.
I can't confirm that, you know.
Hold on a second.
Sorry, guys.
20 minutes.
minutes, I had to tell a barren fact. But it's the last one. The devil went down to Georgia by the
Charlie's Daniels band is the highest charted, quote unquote, devil song ever recorded, peaking at
number three on the Billboard Hot 100 in 1979. Continue. So I can't confirm that it was a demon.
I have spoken to Father Lance since, and he believes it was a demon.
But I have no proof.
The only thing I could tell you is these are my experiences and this is what happened.
Okay.
And I understand that it does make you seem crazy talking about this because it's really just my perspective on what happened.
There's no way to talk about this and not seem fucking crazy.
Sure, but all three of you are facing that.
So don't worry about it.
So the first incident was I was filming like a little skit in my basement with Steve, my friend.
partner.
Is this against Scott's law?
No, no, no.
It's just a skit.
It's a funny little bit.
I also made Brian and Steve.
It's cool.
So,
we're getting ready to film and...
So Adam and Steve, you mean?
No, he's Brian.
Oh, okay, I got it.
Now I get it, got it.
So we're getting ready to film, and I do have this on tape.
Your first name's Brian?
we just get the smell.
There's no other way to put it, but like the smell of death.
Like something died wafts into the room at this point.
And we're like, what the fuck is that?
Like, it smells like death.
Was he, was who was calling you God at this point?
Just me.
I'm guessing myself.
No one's referring to me as God.
But you're for this, this guy, what's his name?
Steve.
Steve, you in that basement are like, I am God.
Yeah, he knows my deal.
Does he know you're doing it?
Yeah.
Does he know you've been calling yourself God?
Everyone knows my deal at this point.
All my friends are like, you know, Brian's being weird, but, you know, it's working for him.
He's, you know, confident and things are going in his way.
Yeah.
So we're filming this thing, and I don't know where we get the smell of death.
And we're like, holy fuck.
Like, that's weird.
Maybe something died in your walls.
So I was living at my mother's house at the time.
We go upstairs and we tell her to come down and it's gone.
The smell is completely gone.
That was the first thing.
And we're like, huh, that was weird.
And Steve's like, maybe it was like an angel.
He's like, angels don't smell like that, dude.
I was like, oh, okay.
So.
What did Steve have for lunch that day?
So then the next incident was, um, it was late at night.
I was coming home.
It's like, you know, three, four in the morning.
And I'm still doing my thing.
I'm walking up the stairs to the top floor to go.
to my bedroom. And in my house, down the hallway is my mother's room, my room, and the other room is
like a den with like a shitty TV. We really don't go in there. I take a step onto the top level.
The TV turns onto static in the other room. The picture next to me on the wall turns like crooked
and I'm not near it. I get to chill up my spine and I just hear a voice go like,
Right.
Like that.
Swear to God, I'm like, and I stop dead in my tracks.
I'm like, what the fuck?
And I'm listening.
I'm quiet.
And I'm like, Mom, did you call me?
Dead silent.
I don't know what else like a pig.
You got a frog in your throat, Mom?
You need a ludens.
Right.
What was the picture that went sideways?
It was a picture that my father had gotten years ago of the army taking the Remigian
bridgehead in World War II that we just had for years up there and that turned.
I go into my room.
I go to bed that day.
Nothing of it.
I keep letting you know, living my life sometime later.
I'm getting home.
It's like six in the morning.
My mother leaves for work.
I'm going to bed.
I put on saved by the bell on TV just to watch it before I fall asleep, TBS would like run in the morning.
As God does.
Yeah.
You know that.
Kelly Kapowski.
Yeah.
It's just funny that this is what threatened God so much that he was like,
we have to send some demons to get this sorted.
He's making videos with his friend at his page,
and watching Save But Bell at 10 a.m.
Still, call himself God, right, man.
That's a threat.
So it's just me in the house.
No one else is there.
And the door from the garage to the house is like this big,
heavy metal steel door.
And I turn the TV off to finally go to sleep
and the door just starts slamming, super loud.
Like unmistakable loud noise,
just banging from there.
I'm like, what the fuck?
And I'm listening to it.
And I have the TV off.
And it goes, you know, it's banging.
I turn the TV on, the noise stops.
I'm like, this is fucking weird.
And I test it.
I keep testing.
every time I turn the TV off.
Boom, boom, boom.
I'm like, okay, I'm just leaving the TV on.
Put the TV on.
It stops.
I go to sleep.
Yeah.
Wait, the door slammed every time the TV was off.
Every time I turned the TV off.
And you went to bed.
It's 6 a.m.
I was in my bed.
I wasn't going downstairs to investigate.
Are you still referring to yourself in the third person at this point?
Are you like, who's in this house with God?
No, I'm just like, what's that?
Yo, like, but it's silent.
And I'm just hearing, boom, boom.
So you're like, I must be fine.
He just went to bed.
You didn't go down and look at the door?
Mom will take care of it.
I was like, if I go down,
God's going to fuck someone wrong.
It's going to get me.
Whatever's there is going to get me.
I'm like, but if I'm up here, I could sleep just fine.
It's a good thing real God isn't as big of a pussy as he is.
As long as he's under the blanket, he's safe.
Yeah.
Yeah, I was just like, I'll stay in bed.
When the TV is on, it's not fucking.
with me. Yeah. So,
sometime later, I'm on my computer, and behind me on the shelf, I have, like, uh, you know,
deodorant, cologne, stuff like that. And I'm on my computer and the thing goes across the world.
How old are you? Uh, 2010. I'm maybe 23 about. What colon does you wear a 23?
Uh, I think I had like curve for men. Curve for men. And I had Gucci, Gucci guilty.
Of course you did. Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So I had those and they were like, it was, it slammed into my door.
And I can't describe it, but there's no way if it's not thrown, it could crash into my door the way it is.
Like this like shelf piece.
So it smashes into the door.
I'm like, holy shit.
I pick everything up.
I put it there.
And then.
I go to bed.
No, no, no.
This was like midday.
So the last incident was
I went to sleep one night
and I wake up in the middle of the night
and my arms are pinned down like this
like Steve no
this gets done
at least let me flip over
don't take me missionary
it's like being back on set right
and my arms are
pin down and something is choking my throat.
And like, I know how to grapple.
I can fight, you know, I know what I'm doing.
You're a wrestler, right?
Yeah, I physically am incapable of moving at this moment.
And I know people say salient paralysis is a thing, but I had all these other things
and I'm just being choked.
I'm going, uh, I'm trying to scream for help and I can't.
And eventually I lose conscious and wake up.
I lose conscience and pass out.
eventually when I wake up, I'm like, rattled and I'm like, talk to my mom.
I'm like, I don't know what the fuck to do about this.
And she's like, have you like, you know, you're calling yourself God all the time.
Oh, my mom knew.
My mom knew, yeah.
I tell my mom everything.
She doesn't care.
But she's like, you know, maybe you should stop.
And she told me a pray and apologize.
I did.
And everything stopped.
Now, I've never been a believer in like any one thing.
I'm still not.
I know there's things I can't explain in the world, but that's what happened.
I was involved.
Yeah.
So what name did you specifically call yourself?
God.
Jimmy, same question.
God.
Michelle, same question.
God.
What were you hoping again from that?
Columbo.
Say like Jesus.
No, Hashem.
Yahweh.
Hashem.
the name.
Tom wants to say something.
Go ahead.
And Mike, though.
Why would that matter?
What was the difference?
Two are Jews.
Jews called him Hashem.
Yeah, but we're like American Jews.
You don't even know what you're talking about right now.
This one's favorite holiday's Christmas.
We've already established all these things.
Asking questions.
Do you want to hear Jimmy's experiences with the demon tormenting?
I have to, yeah.
I want to win this game.
All right.
So, um, fuck it's abroad.
They're making this girl come.
Like, I'm constantly deep in this cord.
It's just during the time.
Yeah.
So, shit's going good for a while.
She's, like, buying me, like.
This is after you agreed to be with her?
Yeah.
This is after you fucked a friend.
She threatened to cut your dick off.
Yeah.
And you were like, God will stay with you alone.
Yeah.
Okay.
So she's, like, buying me gifts, like, left and right.
Like, she's doing, like, everything.
What sort of gifts?
What sort of thing?
Like sneakers, action figures, fucking comic books.
Like, cool shit.
The good stuff.
And, uh, and shit's going well for a little while.
And then, like, you know, I lived alone in a fucking one bedroom apartment in Worcester at the time.
And like, did you call it a temple?
I probably should have.
Yeah, yeah.
And, uh, you know, I, I hear a fucking door slam.
That whatever, you know, maybe the fucking wind blew, whatever.
Like, yeah, you know, I.
But there's only one door in the apartment.
What door was slamming?
Well, I had a fucking bathroom door.
Oh, okay, okay.
Got you.
Well, it was, but.
Okay, got it.
I had two TVs, fucking, I'd be in the bedroom.
You'd think God have more.
I know.
I thought if you said you at a studio apartment.
No, one bedroom.
Okay, got it.
That's, I missed that.
Okay, my apologies.
But I'd be in the bedroom and then, like, fucking the TV and the living room would come on and be just fucking stacky.
Well, maybe I just let the TV on, whatever, you know.
Shit happens.
I didn't really get much thought.
And then I fucking got into a fucking car accident coming back from the gathering with this chick.
another chick or the same
No, the chick
And I was like a minute from my house
And a dude fucking ran right into me
Steve
Steve, what are you doing here?
So now I'm like, all right, like
You know, this sucks, but whatever, you know, it's
Yeah
I'm not really making the connection
You didn't get hurt.
No, my God did, but you know, I was fine.
But I'm not, I'm still at making the connection
And then one night we decide to
Oh, you're counting that the car accident as a demonic.
Yeah.
Okay.
Okay.
This was all going on at the same fucking time.
How much does you have the drink at the gathering?
Some demon hit my car door with the shopping cart recently.
Never forgive him.
So then we decide to, you know, fill myself one night.
And I'm fucking, I'm telling her in the video, you know, call me God, call me God.
And she's like, you know.
Do you still have this video?
No.
I know, but she's like, you know.
Talk about a Patreon.
No one wants to see that.
Do you're wrong about that, my friend?
She's like screaming like, fuck me God, fuck me God.
And I'm like, yeah, yeah, you know.
Yeah, yeah, that's what God says.
Yeah, see?
We're fucking out, she.
Where was to?
And we finish and we go to sleep.
And I wake up and I feel like I'm having a fucking heart attack.
Like, I can't fucking breathe.
Like, I'm laying there like,
like I can't move, I can't breathe.
And finally I like managed to like get out of bed and I'm on the fucking floor.
She's in bed?
She's in bed.
I'm totally naked.
And I just, I'm like, I make the connection.
I just start screaming like, I'm sorry, God.
I'm sorry.
I won't, I won't call myself God anymore.
I'm sorry.
What was he inciting incident on this?
I was like having like a heart attack.
I couldn't breathe.
Like I'm laying in bed next to her.
And all of a sudden like, like my whole body like froze up and I like forced myself out of bed.
I just fucking lost it.
Totally lost it.
Sounds like a panic attack.
You gave up your God's status for a panic attack?
Yeah, well, she didn't take too kindly to it.
She pretty much lost all interest in me after that.
Why you're crying like,
once you said, don't call me God,
you're like, I'm out of here.
I'm only with you because you're deluded.
She ended up cheating on me and taking all those gifts back.
And then she was not,
my shoes.
She probably sold them all.
Yeah.
Oh, God.
So I, but what was demonic about it?
In this entire story, I'm not understanding.
The TV came on by itself.
Yeah.
He got hit by some guy on the way home from a gathering.
Yeah, doors was slamming.
He was being choked and I'm having a heart attack after, you know,
pleasuring his woman.
Yeah.
They're going to come the hardest you've ever come.
He pleaded for God to, to help him.
And he said he would stop.
calling himself, God, and his heart attack just stopped.
And you believe that that was a demon?
What the hell else kind of have been?
You're right.
You're right.
I guess I got no argument.
Maybe I'm confused.
So you made the girl and her best friend come the hardest they've ever come.
The girl, the best friend didn't say that.
The girl said that.
Okay.
Did her eyes roll back in the head during sex?
Like maybe there was some demon?
Yeah.
I honestly didn't notice.
All right.
Some kind of succubus.
Wow.
Jimmy the succubus.
Yeah.
All right.
Okay.
Sir.
Yes.
Could you give us the incidents leading up to when you believed it was a demon?
Yes, sir.
All right.
Thank you.
All right.
So have the tornado outbreak.
It ends that day.
It's over.
I think the next day could have...
What year was that again?
2011.
2011.
Yeah.
I think it was...
It could have been the next day or the day after.
we get on the road, we're going to keep filming.
Now there's debris everywhere, right?
Everything's been fucked up.
Our goal is to go to Birmingham, Alabama, and we're going to shoot with the Task Force One
search and rescue people as they go through the rubble and try to find body parts.
I mean, this, as a producer, you must have been like, fuck, yeah.
Oh, it was incredible.
Like my first day in this early lives getting ruined and we're here to fucking film it all, right?
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah, cool.
You know where I'm coming from.
I was afraid everything was going to be okay.
Oh, I mean, we're flying in black hawks over debris sites.
It's unreal, right?
So we're on our way to Birmingham.
We stop along the way.
We're filming with some other smaller crews on some cleanup.
Everybody's calling your God at this point.
Everyone's calling me God over the walking out.
It's really, it's like, hey, God, can we turn off here?
I go, you know.
So anyway, our goal is Birmingham, but I'm in the same suburban with the same four guys.
And we are in Jackson, Mississippi.
and we're driving in the far left lane of a six-lane highway, doing about 90,
and we get hit in our front quarter-
fucking Steve!
What are you doing here?
Kentucky, you're doing here.
Kentucky, you're over to fucking Mississippi.
Jackson, Mississippi.
We get hit.
We hit the divider.
We start spinning across six lanes of traffic.
And it truly is going in.
slow motion, right? And as we're going, the shit's real. You're seeing your life. You're seeing people from your life.
But I'm also seeing like flashes of my face looking weird and distorted. Like when you look in like a fun house mirror.
And I just remember all so vividly. For me, it's just a mirror. And like, holy shit, I'm about to die. Like that it's, that was really my thought. I'm about to die.
Sorry.
It's right.
We're making ourselves laugh.
I know.
It's funny.
Yeah.
And, um, but I'll never forget that.
It was just a weird part.
So you stop spinning.
No,
no,
no.
We spin and we hit an embankment.
Got it.
We go up in the air and we fucking roll the car.
Holy shit.
Like three or four times.
Crunching.
There's a demon or not.
That part of the story's a hundred percent.
100% true.
Wow, man.
It's part of the, it's part of the behind the scene special.
This is the second day of shooting.
This is in the first week.
Oh.
Okay, wow, man.
Yeah.
So we were like the lead car at this point.
Everyone behind us said they thought we were dead.
Sure.
It was crazy.
So it's spinning around, spinning around.
When we land, I think I'm up.
We finally land.
I think I'm upside down.
And I literally have a thought that I'm dead and I'm in hell because I'm like kind of claustrophobic.
I was more so at the time.
And I couldn't get.
I had my seatbelt on and I start punching the window.
And in my mind, I'm like, I'm fucking dead.
and I'm in hell.
And that is my thought.
And all of a sudden, I hear somebody go, the door's open.
So then, I don't know, I got my wits.
I leave.
The driver's fucked up.
Like, ambulance comes for him.
The other two guys are kind of fucked up.
Nothing major.
I don't have a scratch on me.
I get out of the car.
I can't believe it.
I mean, the car, I can show you guys picture.
The car is fucked up.
Jesus.
Long story short, those three guys end up in the hospital.
I don't even get checked out.
I get checked out on EMS on the site.
God's fine.
All over me.
Yeah.
Of course they are.
I'm more convinced than ever than I'm God.
Yeah.
More convinced that how am I not God at this point?
Right.
Aren't the other three guys gods too?
No, they went to the hospital.
They got damaged.
They were bleeding.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I had nothing.
Nothing.
Oh, not only that, our suburban was full of gear and shit.
It was flying all over the place.
All the airbags were deployed.
And I fucking.
walked out, I'm God at this point, right?
So I feel bad.
We go to the hospital.
We're actually filming in the hospital with the guys.
Like, we're doing the whole thing.
You don't know if the one guy's horrible.
You don't waste a scene.
No.
Listen.
Get it all.
Let the other end of this sorted out.
I'm like, listen, you're going to go to the hospital, right?
All right.
We're going to give the other guy your camera.
We're shooting this.
So it's, it's aving.
Later that night, it's a very long night.
I go back.
We stay in these shitty little roadside motels.
And this weird stuff started happening that night.
What would happen?
So I get in that hotel and the hotel is disgusting.
I lay down fucking exhausted, okay?
I take a shower.
I lay down and as soon as I lay down, someone's pounding on my door, which wasn't
uncommon on Storm Chases.
Hey, Steve.
Welcome.
Pounding.
So my heart and, but that happened a lot at these rows of motels.
Sure.
I jump up, I open the door, nobody's there.
What the fuck?
I lay back down.
I'm like,
Please just let me sleep.
I lay down.
I start dozing off, pounding at my door again.
I open the door and I yell out.
Stop fucking with me.
Okay?
I go.
Yeah.
No, I mean, why?
I'm pounding on the table.
I go back in.
I start to fall asleep and I'm hearing.
Now I'm hearing things.
I'm hearing the sounds of the tornadoes.
I'm hearing.
And I'm just like, okay, I've PTSD and I'm fucked up from this whole experience.
Right.
It's just like I'm processing it.
Adrenaline's pumping.
But I'm hearing my name and I'm going,
what? What? And I'm hearing like tornado rumble, car crash rumble, and in it, I'm hearing
my name. I don't want to be in a creepy voice. And I'm laying there half asleep and I'm going
what? All right. I go to the bathroom to put water on my face. I shit you not. I turn it on
and it looks like blood to me. Not the first time, not the first time I turned down a faucet on
storm chasers that it wasn't like rust, dirt shit motel stuff coming out. But this was fucking
red blood. So I turned it on and it's red blood.
Like it's shining and shit. Yeah. And when I turn the faucet and I see the blood, I go
to put it on my face. I go, and I stop and I look at it and it's clear water. And I'm like,
okay, it was probably the brown water that comes out, right? Don't drink the brown water.
I wash my face. I get back into bed. I'm laying there. Television goes on. I didn't even
take the remote control over to my bedside table. Demon's love turning TVs on and off.
It's one of the easier things I can do.
TV goes on.
I shut the TV off.
I mean, this is all in like half an hour.
I can't even turn on my TV without two remotes and not knowing what the fuck's going on.
What input is supposed to be on?
It's just of a VC box.
Yeah.
I'm like, is the sound bar working today?
I don't know what's fucking going on.
Is that certified demon freak?
Demon Freight.
Satan knows how to work the remote.
And TV goes on.
I shut it off.
I go back to the bed.
Dozing off.
TV goes on again.
I shut it off.
I go back to the bed.
goes on and it's just static.
I'm like, this is fucked up.
I lay down.
I'm hearing shit all night.
I get no sleep.
I wake up in the morning.
This happens now.
We're on the road.
Now all is quiet.
We got our huge outbreak,
but then on a show like storm chasers,
you go like weeks without a tornado
and you're like, we're fucked.
Yeah.
Like we got to just make up scenes at diners.
Start flipping cars and stuff like that.
You know, whatever it takes, Brian.
Yeah.
So this is happening in every hotel room.
And I'm not saying a word to anybody.
So I'm there for like another three weeks and it's happening every night.
The knocks on the door.
The TV.
Steve calling out, Michelle.
The blood in the sink.
The blood in the sink never happened again.
Okay.
Then I go home and I'm not saying anything to my wife.
I'm like, something's weird here.
It's just because of the accident and everything.
Are you telling her that your name is God?
No, no, no, no.
I didn't tell her.
I didn't tell her anything.
That was like a production thing.
I didn't tell her anything.
I get home and it's the first night.
I'm home and wouldn't you know it, I walk past the television in the living room on my way
to the kitchen and it fucking turns on. It wasn't on and then it turned on. All right. Then I go in
the kitchen, whatever I did in there. I got a drink or something. I come back. I go up the stairs.
As I'm walking up the stairs, it turns on again. I get, no, no, no. So what really happened
that sent me over the edge was my wife would take off her engagement ring sometimes. Okay.
So she put it in this little thing. So she took it off. She was doing whatever she was
doing like she makes artwork for the kids or whatever and then she took a shower and then she comes
in and she's like where's my ring i'm like i don't know where your ring is it's right there
whatever and she's not there so now she thinks i'm playing a big prank confusing me if it's taking
the ring and then she's getting mad like gift to me i'm like it's not there she's like you're
making me think i'm crazy because i know i put it there i'm like i didn't take the ring she's like this is
your fault right so this is going on where she really goes to bed mad at me because i'm not
admitting that I took the ring. And you're the one that bought the ring.
I bought that fucking ring. So you should be pissed.
Yeah. Yeah. She lost it. Yeah.
Try telling her that, guys.
He takes a plain and elaborate break on her now. And she knows nothing about God or Satan or
anything that I'm talking with. You know what I mean? So this is freaking me out. And she
doesn't know why it's freaking me out so much. And at this point, you're suspecting
satanic or devilish or demon incursion.
Yeah, because I was never really a big believer in, you know, Satan, but I was a big
believer in ghosts and spirits.
Okay.
Still am, and so is my wife.
Anyway, that night,
we go to bed, she's a little mad at me,
and I'm trying to plead my case that I'm not
playing a prank, you know?
That night, I go to bed, and I'm hearing
the voices again, I'm hearing the rumbling, and I'm
like, so mad that this has followed me
from the road into my house now.
And no, does anyone in your house here
beside you? No. No. No. She's sound
asleep next to me ringless.
And it's going, and it's going, and it's going, and it's going,
in my head I'm getting so mad
and I'm fucking cursing God
I'm saying fucking stop I can't
fucking live this get out of my head
stop it and then I can't say
anything and I can't even think because I
can't breathe anymore and I
feel my throat being
compressed and
tears are coming out of my eyes and I can't
say a word and in my head
though over and over I'm going
I'm not a God I'm not a God I'm not a God I'm not a God over
and it released,
woke up that morning,
the ring was right where she left it.
Wow.
Never happened again.
I got back on the road a week later,
and I made an announcement on the walkie.
I said,
nobody fucking call me God ever again.
And tons of tornadoes showed up
and killed a bunch of people.
Lightning. Wow.
And that was it.
And I was so mad when Eric Duncan called me God
on the set of CBN boy.
I was like, dude, you don't know what you're
fucking with.
Hmm.
I got to pause.
I got to run to the bathroom real first.
Wow.
We'll do it out of here.
Forget it.
All right.
We discussed in the bathroom.
You guys really want to
get your stories, right?
You want to get your stories, right? You want to get
straight? Yeah.
I think. I do have one question,
but
briefly,
have you ever thought
any of you
in 45 seconds of less?
ever thought an alternative to a demon?
You ever try to figure out what it might be
if it wasn't the demons invading your life?
Did you ever come up with an alternative?
Yeah, I did.
I did.
I was always on the fence about it.
And I thought that I was suffering from the car accident.
Yeah, right.
A concussion?
Okay.
Yeah.
And I was never so close to death in my life.
Sure.
What was to know if it's a concussion you thought you saw?
I had nothing.
I had no damage whatsoever.
PTSD, though, is a mental scar.
Yeah.
Right. Okay.
About you, Jimmy?
No, sir.
You're just in your mind a demon.
Yes.
Yeah, I've thought, like, was I going crazy or losing my mind or something?
But, like, everything else was, you know, always exactly the same.
And I still don't know for sure if it's a demon.
I know it was something.
I can't tell you what for sure.
But there was something fucking with me.
And then it stopped.
And then the question that we were discussing in the bathroom, and you kind of
on this because I do believe that people would bang on
hotel doors in the middle of the night, even the crew
members. Yes. So there's an explanation there,
but the two of you,
especially a one-bedroom apartment
with only two doors in it,
doors start a slamming left and right
and none of you, you just
roll over and go to sleep. You just,
you're just like, whatever. Tired. Are young
guys? The guy get
their sleep. He's got his mother
in the house. Like, wouldn't he be worried? She went
to work. She went to work. It's like 6.30,
7 in the morning at this point. I got
to go to sleep so I can get up at three to go wait tables.
But a slamming door is a signal of like intrusion.
And you guys are just no, it had to be five feet away from you when the door slammed,
no matter where you are in the apartment.
Yeah, I didn't hear footsteps.
I don't know.
But that's what I'm saying.
Like you, a door slams.
You don't go out there and.
No, I don't know.
Okay.
It's an apartment, though.
So there could be.
A draft.
It could be from other, the sound from another apartment is what I was thinking.
It's possible.
Like the one of the above, below him, yeah, yeah.
So he could dismiss it.
But was a door open or closed that was previously opened?
Yeah.
So there you go.
There goes that theory.
Here's my question.
And you don't have to answer it.
But if you don't answer it, we're going to know.
Were any of you on psychotropic drugs at the time?
No.
No?
I was taking a lot of ambient.
A lot of ambient, huh?
Oh, okay.
Okay.
No, he swallowed that.
engagement ring.
I didn't wait for it to come out.
You said you had just gotten back from the gathering.
True.
Yeah.
What is,
what was the word psycho?
Psychotropic.
What does that mean?
Hallucinogenic drugs.
Mushrooms.
Weed even.
I mean,
sure.
Or even like Welbutrin or anything that.
Well,
Buterer,
I think I was off of at that point.
I was definitely smoking weed.
You could see stuff on wellbuter.
Oh,
it gives you,
like,
fucked up dreams.
At least did to me.
I've been on it for fucking 20 years.
I think that's just the whole
classes like anything that that
folks with your head is psychotropic.
Oh, I see.
Ambien's a hypnotic.
Really?
I want some.
I figured out, thanks to an aunt, I figured out one time I had written this email
to somebody at AMC and I read it during the live Grammacy show and I said I have
absolutely zero recollection of writing this long email to an executive at AMC and it wasn't
a good email.
It was the one that could have got me in trouble.
And somebody was like, well, were you taking Ambien at the time?
And I was.
And I was like, that's your aunt.
answer. You didn't send it, though. No, I sent it. I sent it. They just never answered.
Can I ask a question? I can see why.
To all you guys, just, just, you know, not too in depth. What do you guys think would have happened?
What would the outcome possibly have been if God didn't step in and rescue you guys?
I think maybe possessions on the table. And then who knows, like maybe my body does something
terrible.
Like, yeah, I'm going to use a crucifix to have an orgasm.
Crucincts goes in, Christmas goes out.
Jim?
I think I'd be dead.
I thought I was on my way to die.
Yeah.
It freaked me the fuck out, man.
Like, I thought, like, I had one foot in the grave.
Like, I was like, fuck this.
Like, I am so done with this shit.
Yeah, I think I could have ended up in a psych
or killing someone.
Killing someone?
Yeah.
I feel like this is a shell without a game.
Are you part of being right now?
Eventually, all that in-wain would be unleashed on somebody at some point.
Wow.
I have an opinion.
Can I ask one more then?
Please.
Oh, please, please.
Have you told your current, well, your wife about this past,
Yeah, I've told her reaction.
She gets creeped out by this stuff and, you know, she's like, don't talk about...
She's a Disney lady.
She doesn't want to hear this shit.
She doesn't want to hear anything paranormal that happened to me, no.
Jim?
No, but she's going to hear it now.
You didn't tell her this.
No.
Fuck, no.
Why?
I mean, look how it ended up next time.
I don't make her come hard.
You could have been like, this is why I'm not fucking you as much.
I don't want to go down.
that path again.
It's for our own good.
I'm not fucking you.
I'm doing you a favor.
I don't know.
All right.
Now, for all of you again,
just real quick,
why do you think this happens and neither,
I don't know if any of you,
maybe I'm wrong now,
but neither of you seem to have,
become believers or lived your life any differently than you would with such an insane
event in your life, I think it would be altering your life and you would become a little bit more
a God-fearing man.
And maybe I'm wrong.
Are you a God-fearing man?
Do you think you've changed and become religious after this?
No, I'm definitely not religious.
I'm an agnostic.
What does that mean?
I believe there's something.
then I can't tell you what.
And it's kind of based on this because, you know,
it's a non-committal.
So it's like,
I'm not going to say you're not real God.
Yeah.
So that way,
in case you are.
Yeah.
I mean,
what more has to happen?
Yeah.
Like,
what's the evidence do you need?
What more?
I mean,
it's the ultimate slack your fucking attitude.
Because I pray to God generically.
Like,
please make this stop.
I'm not God.
I acknowledge this.
A God answered.
Which God, though.
That's the thing.
Was it.
Was it.
Was it Jesus?
Was it because I'm Jewish?
Like, there's so many other questions.
Like, so what is the thing that I'm supposed to follow?
Ultimately, I decided, you know, I'm not God.
Be a good person the best I can.
I like, all he was trying to do is feel good about himself.
Yeah.
Demons are like, we'll see you about that.
Jim, do you?
Well, I have one more.
Where's Steve today?
My best friend.
He's on reviewing history.
Tell, tell the table.
How much a believer Steve is, though.
Steve now is like ultra-Catholic.
within the past because of this, right?
I don't think it's because of this.
I know.
I think it's definitely like...
I love the leading question.
He'll cite it as proof.
He'll cite this as proof.
You know, he's trying to get me to become Catholic all the time, but I'm like, no.
He's not like, hey, he saved your life wrong.
He'll say that.
It's like, what more proof do you need?
I'm like, I don't know.
If I prayed, you know, Jesus Christ come and then it stopped, maybe that'd be something else.
But I just said generic God.
Right.
Yeah.
Have any of you thought about repeating it,
calling yourself God to see if like the same results happen.
Hell no.
I'm good.
Did your ability to make girls come like with that diamond dick?
Did that leave after you stop calling yourself God?
Uh, I think I still have the ability.
You think.
Now and then.
It pops up or not every time.
It does come up.
It does come up.
Four out of ten.
Four out of ten.
It's just funny of like if, if, if I had a girlfriend,
who was on a podcast
and part of her story was like,
I fucked him so good.
I fucked him.
I made him come so hard.
I made him come so hard.
I fucking rocked his world.
Like the unnecessary details.
Yeah.
I would be like,
huh,
did you have to?
Why that has to be part of the story?
Like,
do you anticipate any problems
when this episode is released?
I anticipate problems every time I do anything.
Fair enough.
And Nash,
how come you haven't become a little
bit more of a god-fearing man then no no i did i did i was uh very humbled by the whole thing i didn't
tell my wife until i got home from the final shoot like i didn't want to talk about it like you know
when i was home and it stopped then i went back on the road but i didn't tell her about it because
and i mainly told her about it because she was still asking me about the ring right you know she's still
to this day will occasionally bring it up like did you take it or was it that thing huh so i told her
But I did get, I did, I talk to God more now ever since then.
Yeah.
Me too.
And I'm like, God damn it.
Yeah.
Any questions before Brian Q, uh, weigh in?
Get him?
Well, I think I, my, my, my mate.
All right.
There we go.
I think he's good.
I think he's speaking and good talking.
That's all, folks.
Tom, anything you want to ask to you?
Three men?
No, I had the last question you asked was the one I was waiting for, which was.
Did these demons have vasectomies?
I get a deal every time I get that done.
You know, the devil, the devil doesn't want you to get slipped.
God wants you to cut your balls.
It's how you get closer to him.
All right, Brian, for Emily, who are you saying is our dancer with the devil, the real dancer with the devil?
Real dance with the devil.
I don't think it's Jimmy.
I think his stuff is kind of easily explainable.
The door slamming, who knows?
The TV's turning on it.
Again, that seems a very generic sort of symptom of being infested with demons.
But doesn't he sound like the type of guy that would be like, he wants to like kind of like,
I can't watch any of the bullshit I want to watch.
But doesn't seem like something that like a young Jimmy would do would be like to get off, call me God.
Definitely.
I can actually I can say any of these three guys doing it
Like when Nichelle's like I got out of that car and I was like I'm God like I a hundred percent believe he did that
No doubt he's that guy I love the idea of somebody getting loaded in an ambulance behind them
Who are you? Who the fuck are you?
I mean who's in the ambulance and who's hopping around fucking directed a shoot still
And I do believe it's you said something
key in the bathroom cue when we were talking about it.
Call me Steve.
Don't get it up.
I don't want to be Steve.
Don't get it on my face.
Brian the Shell crying.
Yeah, that was it.
Unless it's tears of pure rage.
Yeah.
I don't see Brian.
More crocodile tears if he won an Emmy or something like that.
It just seemed like humble.
Yeah, I just don't see him as a cryer.
Crying to his wife?
This guy?
Not him.
I don't see it.
Most alpha guy I know.
He is.
He is the alpha alpha.
Hello.
I'm surprised to look over and you're not crying right now.
So I got to lean towards Rupp.
He had so many details.
He was so passionate about it.
And the only thing that doesn't figure is like after all about him being like,
I don't know if I believe.
Because it would make a believer out of me.
if all that shit happened.
Oh, yeah.
I think most people would not be so,
say, savo affair.
Laza fare.
Laza fair.
About the whole situation,
I think it would be a bit more,
it would carry a little bit more weight, I would think.
Yeah, I, I just feel I just lean towards Rupp.
All good.
All good stories, though, man.
Yeah.
Hugh.
And before we reveal, I don't know else I'm going to add,
but we'll get them and Tom,
what they think.
thing. But before we hear who the real dancer is. I mean, yeah, the crying thing was just,
I was like, not my guy, not my man. If we find out you cried. So not even a demon in his mist,
he's not allowed to cry? He's allowed to. I don't think you would. Really? Yeah. I don't think
if anybody's crying in that scenario, it's the demon. Oh, I feel. To hell with the devil.
That's just how much I respect you.
Jimmy, I love the story, bud.
I love the story.
Nothing you said sounded particularly demon like to me.
You threw a car accident in there, you know.
And you didn't even like survive it like a man like Nichelle did.
Like his car spinning around through six lanes.
Somebody, you had a fender bender.
Yeah.
You were hanging it all on a door slam, a TV,
malfunction and what sounded to me like a panic attack of some sort.
So I'm going to go with Rob as well.
Two for Robs.
Yeah, I believe he's the one because he was really into it.
And I mean, the hardest thing, only the reason I believe, I hope it's not true is him calling
himself God to make him feel better.
It's so sad and depressing.
You don't want to think of him.
I don't want to think of him like just trying like that.
I bet he's trying anything, you know.
I'm feeling so down.
I'm going to go the fucking complete extreme opposite.
Yeah, I like him.
I feel bad thinking about him in such dire streets.
But, yeah.
But yes, Steve, you know, and that's beautiful.
That's true.
They're still together today.
So, yeah, I'm going to say Rob, but I think, from.
I'm going to go Jimmy.
How come?
I've heard the Steve Rupp, religion debates, and never has that been brought up.
That story also reminds me of the.
Bachelor Party story.
Some of the aspects that remind me
the Bachelor Party story I've heard you tell.
So you've had you have previous information
that we didn't have.
No, he went to a Bachelor Party at some haunted
house and some of the stuff sounded like
what I remember him saying happened there.
But I also think that the door starts slamming.
You're going to go check it out.
Yeah, but they all said that.
Yeah, but he said it kept happening.
I think like he'd go down and at least make sure it's locked.
Yeah.
Yeah. Nichelle was just
very, very detailed.
But then I remembered his Christmas story that went on for a half hour after I left.
All of a sudden, now you want to edit stories from other people.
We'll call his your cane, yeah.
We've heard you go on for an hour and a half about the black cane and the green cane.
It was mentioned that he was very detailed, but he's given details for fake stories before.
And he even brought in props for fake stories before for the story's sake.
We did have a story.
It's a storyteller.
Yeah, we just had that conversation in the bathroom.
He is a producer and a storyteller.
How old were you guys in the bathroom?
He had this big long conversation.
I was sitting on his lap,
but he's taking my shit.
Time goes different in the airport Plaza,
and just the,
almost like what you,
the exact opposite of what you said,
like the things that could be passed off,
he fixated on,
which is,
I think,
makes me think it was Jimmy.
Yeah.
All right.
I don't think it's in the shell.
I agree with.
get him. I think
Nichelle is such a good storyteller
that, and everything he says is true,
except for probably the demonic part of it.
It's the same thing like when he brought in the props and everything else.
I don't think it's happened to Michelle.
I also don't think, why wouldn't you tell your wife
that this happened at all?
Like, if all of these crazy things happened,
you went to bed that night and didn't tell her.
It seems odd.
No, no, I didn't want to talk about it.
And I didn't want to freak her out because she really believes in ghosts.
That's the sort of stoic.
manliness that I am applying to you.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That's why.
Jimmy, he's not pleasuring multiple women.
Short periods of time, I don't believe it.
That's what it got you in the stage?
That's exactly.
I'm like, nope, not happening.
That was the least believe of our team.
You tell your story.
Hey, Brian called me the policy master once.
I'm giving Jimmy that.
And I think it's rough for no other reason, like, to pull
back a curtain is it seems like if
Ropp would be the one to text you and be like
it's episode 6666, 666,
I have a story about demonic possession.
And then this game came from that. So that would be
my guess on why it's Ropp.
Well, the real dancer with the devil
stand up.
This is exciting.
It's me.
You can't stand up.
Oh, we're not on a video.
Wow.
Wow.
Yeah.
So you believe this.
We're like demon hunters almost.
We can fucking figure it out.
You, Brian, you feel he tangled with the demon or you still think there's another
explanation for all this?
I don't know.
There was a lot of demonic type activity.
So I don't know.
Maybe he did.
I watched all the conjurings.
It seems it's this kind of shit.
Yeah, but nobody in the conjuring just rolls over a supine the moment of fucking demon
attacks.
That's true too.
Or eat cereal much as screech.
If your question is, do I think there's an alternate ex-operative?
explanation. Yeah. Okay. That's what I was getting at. Okay. But you swore to me. You, you swore on multiple people's lives that this is a true story. And I was like, dude, just don't fake up a story to come on TSD. Every word of this is 100% true. The voice, the photo. Every word, not a single embellishment or lie. This is all exactly as I remember it. So your father has a picture of a beach storming. The Ramegan Bridgehead. Yes. I could take a picture. I think it's a little bit of my mother.
this house. Yeah, he got it like this army base was like putting it in their trash.
They were getting rid of it. And like he drove by and so I was like, hey, that's cool.
Can I take it? And like, yeah, sure. And he took it and it was in the house for years.
So it's how I got pop up. Yeah. I remember it well.
Now, when I told Brian and Jimmy that they were going to have to tell this story and like it was their own and I wouldn't tell them that it was like who was the real dancer with the devil.
both of them were like, who the fuck is this maniac?
That's going to be sitting next to us.
You have to realize you sound like you're crazy.
There's no way to talk about this without seeming like you're fucking nuts.
Or were you on drugs?
No, I'm like straight edge.
Like I never drink.
Ever.
I've done it like such a handful of times in my life.
And at that point, I was already not doing it.
Yeah.
Were you on any kind of like medications?
No, I'm never medicated.
No.
Some coughs here maybe?
Just depressed and hated myself.
Do you live near a cemetery?
Or an Indian burial ground of some sort.
I'm not too far from the Blazing Star Cemetery on a, it's, it's down Bloomingdale
Road by those giant gas tanks on Staten Island.
Yeah.
Like I'm right off there.
You're right off there.
Yeah.
Okay.
Huh.
You know what I like how when Staten Island guys get together, they always know where the
other person is talking about.
Oh, yeah.
Without fail.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Small iron, bro.
So can I turn my attention to Jimmy the.
guy for you. How much of your story was true? Oh, none of it. I don't, I, me and him last night
were texting back before I gave him this story. Okay. I don't know where the fucking car accident
came from because that's the fucking thing. Like, we never talked about a car accident. That's the
one thing they took from it. It was like, why are you saying that car accident?
It's like, in Dan, what are you going road? I don't know. I didn't think I had enough.
I don't know.
In the very first episode, he's like, I got him to 20, Al. And he's like, did I tell you to go to
20?
We never mentioned a car accident.
These guys both spoke for 20 minutes.
I had like two minutes, so I need to start adding shit to this.
I told you to tell about making girls come.
I said, just keep talking about that.
That was all you.
That was all you.
If your girl gives you any hard time, just say that, you know,
I'll show her the text.
I'll show her the text, yes.
Wow.
So have you ever made a girl come?
I am actually quite successful.
Yeah, that's what I mean.
Like you don't want to put into doubt.
You're manly credentials, right?
You do that better than you work at the post office.
Oh, yeah.
Okay.
There we go.
Well, you'd have to.
My brother who worked in the post office about 20 years ago
ago listened to the episode.
And he goes, he goes, listen to that guy, Jimmy.
He goes, sounds like the post office is exactly the way I'm like that.
It's hilarious how many people were saying it was not,
it's post office is not that way.
No, my brother, Danny was like, yeah, no, that's how it was.
So originally, Rupp was trying to help me land an expert on the Jersey Devil, some sort of professor from Princeton, I believe.
Yeah.
He bailed on us.
So then he came to me.
He was like, I got this story.
I never told anybody.
He'd never been on a mic.
And I was like, all right.
And I'm going to have to find two people to come in and do it to tell the truth kind of segment.
And I knew I wanted Jimmy.
And I knew I wanted Brian Nishel because of his Christmas story.
Yeah.
I said he is a master at a.
storytelling and kind of
like making you do things. He corrected
himself in the story which I applauded.
You're like, no, actually, you went back and it
was a masterclass of
like correcting yourself in the story
to make it seem like you were, like
it actually happened.
I don't remember doing that. I just get into
my like liar zone.
The fuck's coming out of my mouth. Are you a good
liar? Like, have you been a good liar in your life?
It's a TV producer.
To quote Christopher
Walkin and true romance, the
Your dates were off, though.
My dates weren't off.
Yes, it wasn't.
The super outbreak was April 20.
He said it was the first season of storm chasers.
No, I didn't say it was the first season.
It was my first season.
Oh, okay, okay.
Look at him trying to get you.
That whole fucking story's true.
The crying?
No, the crying.
I didn't even tell my wife.
Let me tell you, I'll take it one further.
I didn't even tell my wife.
from the road.
Like I called her,
you know,
I had to check in with her
every day.
How you doing?
Yeah, it's all good.
Yeah.
You didn't even tell her about the accident.
I didn't tell about the accident.
But what I forgot was I gave her brother a job back in the office,
the original media office.
And then she called me a couple of days later.
She goes,
you were in a car accident?
I was like,
how would you know?
She goes,
my brother's working in the office.
He's looking at the footage.
That's fine.
That's,
that's what I expected.
That's what I,
Yeah, that's what I expected from him.
Not weeping.
Real quick before we end it, though, I do have a very, very quick, fun game about these guys.
Well, what did they win?
What did we?
Oh, they, both you?
Yeah, we both won.
Emily and who was your guy again?
I had a guy.
Emily and you had to do.
Both are going to get a free digital download of War of the Undead audiobook.
Wow.
Truly a very satanic prize for this very satanic episode.
Very nice.
But I asked these men all the same questions, and I want you guys to figure out, just real, it'll be really quick.
Who said which answer to this question?
I have like four questions.
I asked all four men.
Now, we know the devil used the temptation of an apple to entice Eve.
What is the one thing the devil would use to lure or tempt you?
Just tell me who said this.
A spicy chicken sandwich from checkers.
Oh, that's.
I'm going to say Tom simply because, like, there's no checkers around here and these guys all that kind of live around this area?
There is a checkers on Staten Island.
That was the first thing I went to as well.
Could have been Rupp.
Yeah.
All right.
It was.
I'll go back.
And somebody else said,
eternal victories.
Everything I do results in success or victory.
Well, that's the show.
I think that's Rup.
Rup.
Yeah.
Grant me the ability to redo moments.
of regret.
That also sounds like Michelle.
That sounds like Michelle.
I don't think he's the type man that focuses on his regrets.
Nah.
Forward.
This one, this is going to throw a real lucky wrench into the game now.
Always forward.
This one is going to really fuck your head up.
You're like, who the fuck said this?
The promise that the Cartoon Network Hotel would reopen and still be within driving
distance.
That's easy.
That's worth his eternal soul.
and all of ours
apparently
what the fuck
what is up
with the Cartoon Network Hotel
I've been really depressed
since it closed
yeah
where was the cartoon network
it was in Lancaster
we spent New Year's Eve
there
and it was magical
the very last night
was it officially licensed
yes and we stayed
in the Ben 10 suite
and we're the final
final people to stay
in the Ben 10 suite
and I'm really
fucking depressed about it
oh there it is
how long was it
Is that open?
Five years.
How many times you say there?
Twice.
Wow.
Did you fuck one of those Power Puff girls?
I mean, yeah.
Don't you realize what's at stake here that you're giving up?
I guess I didn't really think about it.
I was very upset and I was like, God, I would do to have that back.
You know, like, you know what happens to you in hell, right?
It's not worth.
It's not worth it.
It's not worth it.
I'm telling you.
I just didn't think that much about it.
All right.
I asked these guys, what's the last thing you did?
What were the other answers?
Oh, I'm sorry.
Who said Checkers sandwich was Tom?
Oh, I didn't realize Tom was in on it.
I'm sorry.
I thought it was these three.
No, these four.
Okay, I misunderstood.
Rupp was Eternal Victories.
Yeah, all right.
And Nash.
Right.
Wow, all right.
Okay.
I asked these guys, what's the last thing you did that upset the misses enough
that you wished you could have used
the excuse the devil
made me do it to escape a scolding.
Somebody said,
punch the door
scaring everyone in the house.
Did you hear your hand, Brian?
Really bad.
How'd you guys know?
It's this aggression.
It's handling this, man.
I wish I could have
like some video of Brian
Johnson's eyes
just turning to me
like a possessed doll.
It's you, motherfucker.
I know who.
Eight her leftovers
without asking her.
Who?
I might say Jimmy.
Who was ate the leftovers?
It was Tom.
Drove away
leaving a $700
item in a parking lot.
I drove around the entire next morning and I couldn't find it.
She still hasn't forgiven me even after buying a replacement.
That's rough.
That's rough.
That's rough.
I don't know.
I would guess that's true.
All right.
I mean, who's going to guess this one then?
When I brought something when I was already in debt from Christmas and I was asked not to spend money for like a month.
I started buying things again within the week and borrowing money from apps and she got mad because my impulsivity and seemingly lack of thought or concern about her or our future.
Who could that be?
Our upcoming wedding.
I have no idea.
What is going on?
What was the item?
What are you doing that you stopped that you immediately stopped?
You promised her you weren't going to buy anything.
It was on to Zimbabarkey.
This was a while ago.
This was probably that Master P jersey.
Back in December.
Yeah, this was months ago.
It was that long ago.
It was like it was months ago.
So you borrow money from cash apps?
Yeah, yeah.
How do you do that?
Like a payday loan or something?
Yeah.
Okay.
Yeah.
700% interest
And finally
What was the item?
What was the Aetelis item?
So that was rough.
Yeah,
I was out with both my kids
And I had this $700 double stroller.
I put both kids in the car and I drove home,
you know,
went to bed.
And the next morning I went to look for the stroller and I was like,
oh fuck.
And, you know,
I left in Chili's and someone.
Somebody stole it?
Somebody stole it?
Yeah, I went into Chili's all those restaurants there.
Every store is like to do.
Anybody turning a stroller?
I called the lost and found nothing.
Chapp Chili's check the camera.
Probably in the dumpster, right?
Like,
because they cleaned the parking lot every night there was like,
who you fucked up.
And finally,
Yeah,
you're probably right.
We got the answers from all their ladies.
Oh,
this is cool.
I asked their ladies,
um,
what type of devil is your man?
A horny devil.
A mischievous devil or an ornery devil.
Mm-hmm.
What did Tom's wife say?
Wait, wait, wait,
that's three.
there's only three choices
Oh okay okay
Yeah so you could
All of them could be horny
Well
Now
All of them can be mischievous
Or all of them could be
I mean only one man that I know of here
Got his ball snips
So he could fuck unimpeded
And that is TOM
So I'm gonna say the horny ones over there
Horny devil
Yeah
Is Tom
Yeah
Mrs. Tom said
If my only choices are those
is I guess horny.
What do you think
Mrs. Rob said?
No, it's horny.
It could be horny.
It could be horny or it could be mischievous.
Mishievous.
I'm going to go horny for Rupp too.
Yeah?
Yeah, I think so.
I mean, there's two kids.
I'm working on a third.
But doesn't he shit and wrap it up in boxes all the time too?
What's that to do it anything?
Oh, okay.
All right, yeah.
I don't know nothing about it.
I thought that had to do with him, like him, his wife being like, not tonight.
You gifted someone's shit.
I got a headache.
You didn't watch your hands.
I'm going to go, I'll go horny.
Sure, why not?
Stan Island boy, likes to get that dick working.
I'm going to say ornery.
You can say ornery.
Mrs. Rupp said mischievous.
All right.
Mischievous, huh?
That's cute.
I'm always, you know, popping out, scaring our kids, fucking around.
All right.
Jimmy Hair guy.
We know it's not horny.
So we're done on the mischievous or orny.
Ornery.
Ornery.
Yeah, ornery means like, you know, like angry.
Yeah, you're quick to lose your temper.
Right.
Oh, I know.
They've been called it once or twice in my life.
I'm going to have to go mischievous with, with Jimmy.
I agree.
Because he doesn't seem pissy or angry.
He doesn't have, he has a sunny outlook.
He seems to enjoy things that I could never.
And I don't think his lady would tolerate that if he was like pissy and ornery.
I don't think his lady would be like straight enough.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, I'm with you.
Especially, yeah, I go.
I'm with you.
I'm with mischievous.
What was she considered like going like he said when they fight?
He just disappears.
It's not really ornery though.
Jimmy reveal what Mrs. Harris said.
I'll read to her exact response.
Um, I mean,
right at this current moment, you're an ornery
little devil, but I wish you were a horny little devil.
Oh, wow.
Oh, me, Jimmy.
So you got to turn that frown upside down then.
I guess so.
What are you ornery about it?
I think he's going to turn upside down.
I don't know.
I don't know if we were fighting at the moment.
I have no idea what the hell I was ornery about.
I don't even know what that word meant at the time.
I still don't know.
Oh, he's the bastard.
What did you do for Valentine's Day?
Did you lay it down?
Did you?
I took her to see Send Help, baby.
And then I laid it down.
You did.
Yeah, you gave her what you.
I took her to see Sam Ramey.
I took her to dinner and then I laid her down.
All right.
Send help is good, right?
Send help is.
Oh, you saw it.
Oh, you saw it.
It's great.
Yeah.
Now we've got Mr. Nash as our final devil.
Is he ornery?
Is he mischievous or is he horny?
Now, from the stories I've been told about in the shell,
there seems to be a lot of, like, stalking around the house and lecturing.
Okay.
So much since the kids are gone.
We're empty nesters now.
Keep that in my too.
We're empty nesters.
How long have you been married?
25 years in June.
What year did you get married?
I might take one.
Yeah.
25 years.
25 years.
It's a long time to keep them fires of burning.
On a level that you would be described as as a horny.
As a horny.
He did fucking bust the door down.
No, I have no doubt.
That would put him in an ornery category.
I wouldn't be like, oh my God, look at that horny devil.
I'd be like, that what the fuck is crazy.
Yeah, I want to go ornery.
Yeah, that's what I would lean towards to him.
Mr. Nash?
Well, she said, without hesitation, she goes, oh, horny.
Yeah, all right.
But then she said, if they asked me 10 years ago, ornery.
Ornery.
Yeah, I've softened.
I should have.
I should have.
I should have.
Haven't we all?
Yeah.
Haven't we all?
Ironically, a horny devil softened.
In all the right places, though.
Well, that is it for 666.
666.
Do we hit the 6 hour and 66 minute mark?
We hit the 2 hour and 25 minutes mark.
If we keep the bathroom break in, do we get us the 6 hour mark?
We're still not going to make the time.
No, unfortunately not.
Thank you all.
Yeah, nice work, guys.
My stroke.
Thank you for having me.
Thanks for having me.
I think you better start going to church and start wearing a Catholic cross.
You know, because, you know, he stepped in for you when he needed you the most.
And Father Lance didn't tell you to start going back to church.
I mean, I'm a Jew and he still hooked me up, so I really have to do anything, I guess.
Jimmy, thank you.
This means the world of me, boys.
I can't thank you enough.
Thanks for having me.
And Brian, Michelle, thank you for your wonderful contributions.
Absolutely.
Yeah, I love that these guys come in and they just put it all out there, you know.
Hey, man, I got a vasectomy.
Hey, man, I don't like the fuck.
Hey, man, I got a vasectomy.
Tell them, Satan.
