Tell Em Steve-Dave - #668: Shoez n Tamponz

Episode Date: March 9, 2026

Q’s roast report, Girl Scout cement heads, Bry eschews tv for reading, Walt goes skating, joining the ‘mile long’ club, Git ‘Em reveals childhood secrets.https://public.liveread.io/media-kit/tesd

Yeah, if you have a heavy flow or a big pussy. Yeah. It's great PR for you. Imprical Joker, rescue sex shop. The juvenile in you guys, don't? Give you. Tell him, Steve, Dave. Hello, and welcome to this week's edition of Tell him Steve Dave.

Walt's here. I'm here. Q is here. Hello. Gittam is here. How you stanking? Of course, me. I am here too.

We are all here and ready to do a show. I'm on the edge of my seat. Are you? Something was just said before we started recording that got me salivating. Getham's going to reveal something? Walt said it was big. Yeah, big news. It's confirmation of some things that the Internet has always questioned about Gidtum.

I think it's not confirmation. It's poning them in essence at some parts. What's the difference? Confirmation. I know you love the, I know that poning is your go-to word, but if this were to be in a like a Senate hearing, I think the confirmation would be the word to use, not poning. Okay. It sounds a little bit more maturely confirmation. Poned his ass. Like a 148 would use the word confirmation, you know.

Okay. A dullard would use poning. Okay. That's for 131s. Yeah. That's later in the show, no. Oh, okay. Well, it's later.

We're wetting everyone's appetite. Yeah, wait a little. Yeah, it'll be the finale of the show. Okay. Well, I want to start it. I wanted to hear about this. Oh, before we even get to that, I forgot to tell you guys that when I went to that show last year, the, I mean, last week, the comedy show. It's a place called Rodney's.

Sure, Rodney Dangerfield. Right. He used to be Dangerfield. Now it's Rodney's. And the first act to come up is a Rodney Dangerfield impersonator. Oh, how did he do? Well, he didn't, not great. Okay.

He didn't look like Rodney. And he didn't sound like Rodney. Yeah. But he did use Rodney's material and people seem to like that. Okay. He just stole the jokes? Just took the jokes. The old jokes that he did.

He just did them? Wow. He covered him. Yeah, it's like a cover comic. But the thing I forgot was that, now he was an older guy. He was, I know, when I say older, like, I'm getting to the point where I'm like, oh, I'm that old. Why am I calling him old? But he was probably like it is.

mid-60s or so. Okay. He still a while's away from that. He took, yeah. You know, yeah, no, I'm not, right? Right around the corner. God damn it. He's closer to it, then he's not.

So riding this young man. He took a header down the stairs. Oh, no. Yeah, I forgot and, like cracked his head. Oh, no. He was bleeding from his head. Now, I tell you, like, you know what the stairs look like here at the plaza. That's what they looked like.

Ooh, steep. Yeah, steep. And he fell. Gravity and giving him no respect. This guy, none at all. This guy, this comic Jimmy Paloma was there to witness it. And he was like, it was something else. He was like, I've never seen somebody fall down the stairs.

He just to like dove into the air and just fell. Oh, I saw that once. It's so horrible. Yeah. Really, why do you try to get more air? I don't think it was purposeful. The way you trip, you launch out over the stairs, which means you've got a four-foot drop before you even hit this. That forward momentum.

Yeah. My wife falls down the stairs quite a bit. She's constantly tripping over her own feet and like going down the stairs. It's like somebody's setting up an alibi. In fact, nobody's seen her for a while. I think she's at the bottom of the stairs. When's the last time she got her shoes measured when she picks up new shoes, she should get her feet measure. Probably been a while.

She buys everything online. Yeah, I bet you her shoes don't fit properly. Too tight or too big? One or the other. Right. I bet she doesn't have properly fitting shoes. I'm trying to get her to wear high heels around the house. It's like girls, like, girls don't know how to buy shoe.

Like, they buy the wrong-sized shoe. And apparently from the commercial I see the wrong-sized tampons. Oh, yeah. Yeah. So, like, they have problems sizing things up. Well, wrong-size-shoe. The idea was always that, like, women want to have small feet. So they're always squeezing their feet into these small shoes.

Like Chinese, like, yeah, yeah. Binding and stuff. Like, they get that joke, like, what, every other episode of Married with Children? Oh, right. Yeah. Yeah. What joke? Like, when one would come in, she says, I'm a size six.

And I was like, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, got you got it. Yeah, I didn't realize different-sized tampons? Yeah, I saw a commercial. Yeah, if you have a heavy flow or a big pussy. Yeah. The girl, a famous comedian was doing the commercial. She's in the bathroom, and women are coming in, and she's like, do you know what size you need or what?

Wow. Yeah, what's that comedian? She's got blonde hair. Sure. Yeah. Amy Schumer? Oh, yeah, yeah. I think I've seen that commercial.

Yeah. Yeah. And I'm just like, wow. I mean, that would be the equivalent of me, like, like, buying a hat that, like, goes over my lip, like, if I put a baseball cap on it comes down. Weird Harold and shit. Yeah. And it hangs down below my chin and I'm just walking around pumping in the shit, I would think. Right.

Amy Schumer pops up as like, your hoodie. You know what size? Oh, it's about the flow? There's two different ones. Isn't there a size, too? Or am I just thinking about flow? Oh, this is Amy before she went and lost all that way, huh? Yeah.

Yeah, the commercial is gross And I feel bad for the guy. Like it's set up so it's these two newscasters And she's like a weather person And she's supposed to be talking about tampons and whatever. But that's the joke though. The flow is the weather. I guess so.

You know, if it's going to be drizzle Or it's going to be a downpour. Feels like a stretch to me, but you know, sure, why not? No, that makes, it's a great analogy. I wonder if that happened in real life With that, because there's one dude in the commercial, he's a sole anchor man. Would he have a sexual harassment case on his hands?

Would he ever be like these ones? we're talking about their flow the entire time. I think it's a non-sexual thing. On a commercial about tampons? Or you mean on a real newscast? In the newscasts. Like, you all just started going on about heavy flows and stuff like that. I think that he could probably go to HR and be like, yeah, could you maybe tell them.

Ask them not to talk about heavy flow days? But I don't think he could be like, I have a sexual harassment suit. I think it's weird that you equate that conversation sexually, though. Like you put sexual context. No. No? No? That is not, I don't, no, I don't equate sex with that. With vaginas?

With blood. You don't? I feel like, I just met this guy. It's interesting that, you would, you would phrase that as a sexual conversation. You know, only because it involves, like. Because it comes from a certain area. Yeah. Okay.

Yeah. Like if I were to talk about like condoms at work, is that the same thing? No. Well, well, saying that that's directly sexual related, so that would be a bad thing. I would say a leaking vagina and a runny nose. If you had it, like my nose was running so bad, I couldn't get it to stop. Oh, I want to hear about one more than the other for sure. If I have my choice.

But it's the same thing. Neither or, I think, are sex. though. True. True. I mean, just because it's a sexual area, it's more sexual than a nose. I would think so. Like, if I had a juvenile in you guys.

Yeah. G-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-you. Can't have an adult conversation about heavier light flow. No, definitely not. Not with me. I don't want to hear it. I don't give a fuck. How did this roast go?

It went all right. Yeah? Yeah, it went okay. It was between the two. Jersey did not like the material. Your material? Yeah, I mean, they liked it because they got to argue back, you know what I mean? But I didn't do the, remember I said I had two choices for the way to do it?

I don't think I chose the right one. Jersey did not like it. So you were really mean about it? Yeah, I went after them and they came after me pretty. I mean, it was fun. It was still fun. because it was a roast and all that stuff. But in terms of the material, I think, got lost because the reaction was so long.

Hey, fuck you, Staten Island. But, you know, I opened up about how Staten Island was better than Jersey and stuff like that. The fucking booze started immediately. But it was fun. I mean, the event was great. It was a lot of fun. That's cool. Yeah, yeah, it was cool.

Who was the special guest that? Because there was a special comic that they were announced. Joey Diaz. Well, no, they announced. They were supposed to have a special guest. And then that special guest backed out at the zero hour. Yeah. So they had Joey Giaz.

He killed. Yeah, he's good. Him Chris Gethered fucking slaughtered. It was awesome. Yeah, I did not slaughter. I got slaughtered. Yeah, Jersey rose up against Staten Island in that moment. But it was fun.

You know, it's a roast. I mean. That's tough, though, because now you have an entire, Because that's not a small venue. So now you got the entire theater yelling at you? No, it wasn't the entire theater. It was good nature. It wasn't like people were going to get you after the show.

It was like, oh, fuck you, Santa. Now, how long was your set? Five minutes. How long did it take you to come up with five minutes worth of material? I mean, I've been working on it for a couple, for a few weeks, I guess. They have writers there, too. So they want you to submit what you have. Oh, really?

They had to proof, or like, approve of your your jokes? Yeah. Wow. And, I mean, not approve. I guess they just said, like, we have, like, people who do roasts if you want them to look at it. Oh, okay. This kind of language we fly on Staten Island.

This is New Jersey. No, they actually were like, you got, they were like, because the idea was that I was come out and be a heel. Like, I was going to be, like, the bad guy. And I was. And, but, um, they wanted more heel. And, and, uh, I think. You weren't willing to go full heel? No, no, I did do it.

Um, oh, there it is. is it a review taking pride in his Staten Island native outsiders find his aggressive antagonism of the crowd matched in kind by an intensely negative reaction What more do you want? What more do you want? That's awesome. That's awesome.

Yeah, it was fun. It was fun that the whole event was fun. I had one joke that bomb that I wish I didn't say but other than that you know, it was a roast baby. Boom. That's... You weren't sure, but you weren't sure, but you almost sure you were going to you got paid for it.

Oh, I got paid for it. Nice. Yeah. Yeah, it was, it was, it was, it was fun. I mean, it's fun sitting up there and watching those guys and you know what I mean. They, they, uh, you got some real masters up there. Right. That guy Chris, covert, who you guys know. Yeah, he's a local red bank comic. Killed. Did he? Killed. Yeah, he did great. He did great. Yeah. Afterwards, we were talking about a little bit and like the patterns seemed to be that Jersey people did really well. Because, they were able to do that thing where they were able to make fun of Jersey while still saying, like, I love this.

Yeah. Whereas people like me who came in. Outsiders. Yeah. I'm like, I thought it was a roast people. Yeah, they didn't like outsiders coming in and then doing it. But it's fun. I had a blast.

Yeah. Yeah. I don't know if I'm too uptight or I'm too proud of my state, but I don't know if I would like to sit there for an hour and hear someone, you know, piss all. over the garden state and, you know, the state I live in, I might get a little irked. Well, I started throwing punches. I would say don't go to a roast of New Jersey. That's an easy one to avoid. Yeah, but, like, I would have gone enough.

Like, I would have been there. I know you had tickets for us, but it was a conflicting schedule. But once I got there, I wonder if I would have been, like, a little hostile and. Yeah. Especially with the Staten Island guy coming up there. Yeah. Well, based on the rest of the crowd, I would say yes. You would have.

Oh, it would have been too rough. You wouldn't have liked to. Or somebody who's a proud Jerseyan. Wouldn't like what I had to say about Jersey, baby. Now, does this color your opinion of New Jerseyans that maybe they're soft pussies that can't take a joke? Oh, no, no, no, quite the opposite. I thought, me?

No. No, no, no. That's what I mean. Like, when they were booing, they weren't like, you know. Like sincerely booed? Yeah, it was like, it was like good. It was like, fuck you, dude. Yeah, I was actually impressed.

I even ended the set by going, I guess, I guess the idea of coming out here and insulting all you guys wasn't the right idea. And then I held up the Jerseye Devils thing. And I said, but I'm a devil's fan. And then I got an applaud now. So I got off to applause. There you go. You left the stage to applause? Yeah.

Good. Yeah, sure. Yeah, it was fun, though. I don't know if I would do another roast of something like that where I didn't know the person. Like that's the problem. Like I know Chris Getherd and I know Vinny Brand up there, but that's it. Like everybody else I didn't really know. So it felt weird.

Like I kept crossing off jokes. Oh, because somebody else said them. No, because that's like I didn't want to say it to people I didn't know. You know what I mean? Like. Oh, you're not, like I thought, wait, this was somebody named New Jersey or this? No, no, no, no. What you do is you roast the state.

Yeah. And then you take shots at people on the day. Oh, you take shots at the other comedians? Yeah, like people. But if you don't know them, how do you do that? You have to know of them. Of them. Yeah.

So, like, I got a hit a bunch of times. I got, but I, you know, I love that stuff. So it didn't bother me. But I felt weird saying stuff to people I didn't know. Yeah. So I know Chris got it pretty well. So I went up to him beforehand. I said, I said, dude.

I said, you're really one of my only friends up. I said so I might relay into you a little harder. And he was like, oh, same thing with you, buddy. So it was good. So stuff like that. But yeah, but it wasn't as fun as doing it to your friends. So if I did another one, it would have to be someone I know. But, you know, it was good.

Nothing compared to the Q roast. Oh, no, that was so much fun. Yeah. Like, yeah, like that woman in front of me right there. Natalie Cuomo. She's so funny. And like, I had a joke about her. And I said it.

And the second I said it, I felt bad. Like on stage, I felt bad. It's just not, you know what I mean? It's just making fun of people that I don't know. It doesn't really work too well for it. Yeah. Yeah. When you know, when you know people like you know better what's going to get to them,

like what you can needle them with and what you can. And they know you love them. You know what I mean? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

I don't know you, she was like, I don't know you, dude. No. No. Right. Exactly. You know, so then I, I mean, on stage and the moment, I felt bad the second I said it. So that's never good. Did shealy's laugh?

Oh, sure. It was funny. But it was just, I just don't like saying mean things. Is he too nice for the roast? I don't think so. Jersey, certainly don't think so. No, no. If he was too nice, he wouldn't have taken the gig.

He would have taken the gig. Yeah, I'm not a fan of the roast format. Yeah, I think it's mean-spirited. Even Dean Martin. Even Dean Martins can get a little below the bill. Well, Sammy's there. Oh, boy. Sammy took it to stride.

He really did. Yeah. Yeah, it's a little bit too rough for me. You know, I feel it's... You even felt that way at the Q-Rost, I remember. Yeah, I just don't. You don't want to say certain things. I mean, I understand it, and I get why people love it and people who are great at it.

You know, they can excel at it on... Yeah, that's not my type of... Yeah. I said Red Bank is like a... It's like the town equivalent of a guy who forgot to wipe his ass. And it got many... Boose. Yeah.

It's like what happened in this town. This town used to be so beautiful. Oh, okay. And now it's like, yeah, the Red Bankians didn't like it. They don't like it. They don't like it. Yeah. How is Voss?

He's pretty good, too, Rich Voss. He's great. He's funny. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, everybody up there is funny, really funny. His, Bonnie McFarlane, his wife, she fucking killed. She's really good, right?

She's funny. She's really funny. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, everybody up there. It's funny. Vinnie Brand killed. Like, everybody up there did great. How Tiki do?

Tiki did good. Yeah, more than, more measured one, more like, you know, not going for a joke a minute, but he did good. All right. Did you pull some of your jokes about him just in case, you riled up? I started cutting jokes left and right. Once the, once the booze started going, I was like, all right, let me not go go too hard. I've heard you lost them. But, but hey, man, you know, you know, you can't win them all.

It would have been nice to win the crowd over with some bawdy jersey jokes, but you just can't pull out. You're starting out of disadvantage being from Staten Island already, right? I led what's, I came in with Staten Island. Okay. And how much been in. And now we've always had Jersey to look down upon and, you know, stuff like that. So I did certainly came in. But at the same time, afterwards, Jeff Ross was like, yeah, he goes, that was awesome.

You went for it. So I was like, yeah, what are you going to do? I mean, if Jeff Ross says it, then you know you did, all right. Yeah. So what are you going to do? It's a shame like one of the great roasters, like when they used to do those Comedy Central roasts, Greg Geraldo. There's a guy who, he was a comedian who died of a drug overdose. They were like waiting for him at a comedy club or something and he didn't show up and they're like, this is very unlike him.

And he was already dead in some hotel room. But that dude was like, it was unbelievable how good he was. Really? Yeah. I mean like a assassin. Like a master class in roasting. Yeah. Yeah.

Well, I had a blast. And I appreciate it. And I love the state. I just, I love the state of New Jersey. So I hope I didn't damage my relationship with them. But the same time, when you're going for the heel roll, like the booze are the applause. You know what I mean? So it's like it's a little bit of weird one, but whatever.

Yeah, you're going for what you're not supposed to really be hoping for. Speaking of heels, did you hear about the recent revelation on the WWA? What? Of the new character that they brought in? Danhausen? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, watch every week.

Yeah, I'm happy. He's already having fun over there. That was Ming in the ring with him, right? Ming's been in the ring with Dan Housen. Okay, yeah. Dan has a bunch of indie shows and stuff and Ming shows up to him. Right, okay. Yeah, I thought I saw him.

I thought it was him, but I couldn't really tell from the video. Oh, yeah, Ming posts to tons of them. Oh, did he? Like, here's me getting cursed by Dan Housin. Yeah, he's a great guy. It's good stuff. Okay. Now, Walt, I know that you're against this term,

the munchies. You don't like it. When you get hungry after smoking a lot of... After smoking some weed, yeah. I'm against it. Well, you were mocking it a lot of time. It wasn't scientifically proven that it can stimulate an appetite. It is, but you were

mocking it once time. They don't like the goofballs who are like, you're like, I got the fucking munchies, that's what I'm talking about. That's what I'm hoping for. Good leading. Yeah, I cannot stand the potheads who talk like, dude, where's my car?

Right. Like shit like that. Like Chichen Chong type shit. Yeah, I hate it. Were your girls ever Girl Scouts or Brownies or whatever? For a very quick window before they were just like, there's just too many obligations. We're Flanagan's. We don't like too many obligations.

Yeah. We got too many malls to go to on the weekend. We're not going to sit there and sell a fuck of cookies for eight hours in front of a fucking true hardware store. Well, maybe not true hardware, but this Girl Scout group set up outside the daylight dispensary in Mount Laurel. And it was a smoking success. Of course. But the move made senior leaders at the Girl Scouts displeased and it drew criticism. They were scheduled to set up shop at the same location, but it was canceled due to the controversy.

Now, I see it the same, there you go. I see it the same as like setting up outside a liquor store. Sure. It's just as legal. Same, same deal. Yeah. But should Girl Scouts be outside liquor stores? Um.

Like, because I couldn't figure out. Oh, God. I couldn't figure out how I felt about it. Yeah. Well, what's the neighborhood like? Like, is it just because I'm, all right. Like, could she set up, like, on the sidewalk outside of it? Yeah, that's where I think they were, like, right outside the door.

Right. But I mean, like, outside the parking lot there. So it's not technically on it? I mean, who gives you? Let him set up there. What's the problem? I guess it's like it still has a stigma. We, because it's not federally legal.

It's not legal in all states. Yeah, but they're not in the shop. Right. Yeah, but they see all the potheads going in. They see all the drugs of society. All the zombies going in and out of the. Yeah, and then they see mid-dinner laying in that. When their parents get home, it's all the same shit.

They're just like, what's wrong with that man going in there? You know, he can barely fucking function. Yeah. You know, you can't even open the door. You don't have enough strength. Well, you're going into it? He's got all pock marks over his arms. There you go.

You know how you shoot up weed. He took three marijuana if it was never the same again. Yeah, but I guess the senior leaders are like, we don't want to be associated with pot, you know, with weed or dispensaries or anything. Yeah. But they shouldn't vilify the, the girls and the parent who took them there because it wasn't in the bylaws. If that's the case going forward, okay.

But stop making a big deal of it. Certainly don't bring it to the fucking news and make it a... Yeah, how does this become a story? Right. Like, don't, but don't be so outraged that it gets picked up by the wire. Because probably one of the girls' moms who's weed friendly was like, he's fucking little, these stodgy motherfuckers. Look, there's hardworking these reporters at New Jersey 101.1.5 who have to write these stories as part of their jobs.

Genius Girl Scouts set up shop outside in New Jersey. That seems like they're in support of the Girl Scouts. Yeah. 200 recreational marijuana dispensaries now operate it in New Jersey and thousands of Girl Scout troops in New Jersey. So it shouldn't be shocking that the two joined forces. Oh, come on, man. There's a weed dispensary on Stad Island called Highstone. And those guys are great.

Like, they're always doing stuff with the community and stuff. Like, it sounds like they wanted to work with the Girl Scouts to help support the Girl Scouts. Right. It was nice of them. And, you know, people are going to be more likely like, oh, wow. Like, like, potheads are known to, they're not like, like, when I used to take oxies. Yeah. The chances of me sharing that were like nil.

Sure. I'm not sharing any fucking pills with you. Get the fuck out of here. But when you're talking about pot, you're always willing to shift. Sure. Potheads are very, like. Very open to it. I think my girls are obviously, they're adults now.

I have a niece, and if she was like, can you, can you help take me this weekend and set up? I would definitely not set her up in front of a weeds place, though. Yeah. No, I would not think that is something that, it just, like, kids in that, they should be as far away from that as possible until they're old enough to be exposed. I can figure it out. I understand that angle. I understand that point of view. Yeah.

I get it. What about gas stations? It just wouldn't bother me. Gas stations? Yeah. Why gas stations? Because I've seen the Girl Scouts are front of gas stations. Oh, I thought you meant don't bring your kid to a gas station.

No. Why? Because it's dangerous? I don't know. I just, yeah. Like, it just seemed, it always seemed a little out of place to me, like being at a gas station. Like, I understand in front of a supermarket or... PetSmart, something like that.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I just think there's too much traffic going around, you know, in and out of a gas station that you don't want to have any kids setting up at a fucking card table. you know, getting mowed over by some dude who just fucking pulled out of dispensary. Look, I don't get all these pock marks. So that was the hubbub on New Jersey. Should these Girl Scouts be setting out? Yeah, I believe their official reasoning was that they don't want them setting up outside of businesses

that they can't partake of. That's what upper management said. Yeah. I mean, again, you're just like, I get those rules, but it's like, you're just deciding their rules. I guess it should be if you can't, if a kid can't go into that store legally. Yeah. Any store.

Let's say it be a liquor store, dispensary store, or even or, you know, like a shady store, like a adult shop. Yeah. Like you shouldn't have probably kids anywhere near the property, you know, trying to sell. I can get it for an adult shop for like a sex shop. For sure. Liquor store, I don't know. It's the liquor store in a, in a strip mall, and they're just like near it. Is that okay?

Yeah. Yeah, I guess, yeah. There's just so many. It's gray areas. There's gray areas where there's anything with a sex shop, I'd be like, they should not be in a strip mall with a sex shop. And it, like, they should get out of there. Do they even exist anymore? I have no clue.

But, sex shops? Yeah. Yeah, like in New York, there's some. Yeah. There's one down in Key West. there's actually two down in Key West. There's one right on Duval Street, and then there's one on that front street, too. There's Adam and Eve on Duval.

Oh, yeah, but that's more like, yeah, I guess you're right. Yeah, you're right. That one on, that one front street closed. Oh, did it? Yeah, closed out. But, yeah, they were more lingerie shops than. Yeah. You have a great PR for you.

Imprical Joker, rescue sex shop in Key West. Yeah. You came in and bankrolled them. Yeah, like, guys, you're going to love this. Yeah, that's all right. The unofficial mayor of Key West saves another sex shop. Guys, we're almost down to one sex shop because of the efforts of me. We're back up to two.

I've been doing a lot of reading lately. Good for you. And one of the things, yeah, a lot. Instead of watching bullshit TV. I've been reading a lot of Joe Hill lately. I read this Justin Cronin series. It was like a three-book series. And what I'm peppering in there, or trade paperbacks.

and trades that I have from a year. I mean, I had Lock and Key. I was going to buy Lock and Key. It's a Joe Hill series. Yeah. I'm just going to buy it, you know, because I really liked King Sorrow, the book he just wrote. I'm going to check it out. So I go, I went and I looked at my bookshelf, and I'm like, I already have it.

Right. That's how little I'm aware of the shit that I have. So I read that. And then I sum four out of five books into Why the Last Man. Oh, yeah. Have you ever read that? I don't think I ever read that. Yeah, I read it.

That somebody took a gender. studies class. Holy shit. That is girl powery. That is super, super girl power. If there's going to be any power, it's going to be girl power. It's all girl power. I like it. Yeah, it's good. It's a good series. The TV show was not good. Oh, that's what I heard. They made a TV show

bad? It was, it was brutal bad. What year would this have been? Three, four years? 20-1, I think it was. It's a very small station then picked it up, right? Not got no... Fex maybe? No, they just dropped the ball so badly. No promotion. I think everybody just agreed to

not talk about it. Maybe he had a monkey. Yeah. Monkey's great. York is the monkey's name? No, York is the guy's name. The guy's name is, what the fuck is the monkey's name? Now, I'm just reading it.

Cheetah? York and, oh, Ampacant? Amperson. Yeah, yeah. I should know, because he makes a big deal about the whole symbol and stuff. Yeah, yeah.

Mel, Capuchina. Yeah, they tried to make why the last man smack in the middle of like, you know, all the, all the gender turmoil that was going on. So they couldn't even, so they didn't even want to say. They were like, we can't, you know, they were like, well, he's not really the last man because trans women are men too. And like, then they went all in on that messaging. And you were like, yeah, but that wasn't in the books at all.

And so people were like, I don't know if I don't know. Yeah, you're talking about a virus that wipes out all biological male creatures. Yeah, they tried to walk. they tried to step around it so much that you were like, guys, if you have to step around it this much, just forget it. Maybe just forget it. Yeah, like, maybe it's just not the show he should be making. That makes sense.

What network was on, get him? FX. FX. I started watching Ted Lasso. Did you watch this? It's on Apple, right? Apple. Yeah, first season was fucking really good.

Oh, yeah? Yeah. Is it a comedy? Yeah, it's a comedy. I was, I was stayed, you know, I don't know why. I never been into it, but I started watching. I was like, fuck, I get why everybody loved this show. If I seem a little down, it's because last night I watched the final episode of Friends.

I'm done with it. Get out. Whoa, man, you burned through that. Holy shit. Yeah. It's like, what, 11 seasons or something? Ten seasons? Yeah.

The last episode was it plucked at the strings. Let me guess. Somebody gets married. No. Not in the last episode. Second the last episode. All right. Were you satisfied with the send-off?

I had heard the fandom wasn't satisfied with the send-off when it originally aired, oh, so many years ago, but I found myself, like, you know, sitting up in bed and pumping a fist in the air when Rachel came back and got off the plane and came back to Ross. I was like, you know, a triumphant moment, you know. Why did people not like that? I don't know what they didn't like about it, but I guess Chuck told me that the friends' fandom did not. didn't stick the landing. Like most series don't stick the endings. There's very few series that are like the endings are beloved.

Like MASH is one of them. But that's like what? That was fucking 75 years ago. Did you guys hear that show Dark on Netflix? It's German. It's in German. So you got to watch it with subtitles. Oh, it's fucking awesome.

I just finished that. It's time travel stuff. It's so fucking. If you could deal with like the subtitles, the subtitles, it's not, they don't walk, they're not holding your hands for, any of it. Like, you literally have to pay attention at every... Oh, so read and pay attention.

Yeah, it's actually better to read it because it helps you absorb what's going on and stuff like that. They're literally like, if you're too stupid to fucking keep up... Is it dark? Yeah. It's like, it's like real. Well, it's dark matter is... Oh, okay.

And the God particle and all that stuff. But, um... Yeah, they're like, if you can't keep up, go fuck yourself, American. And I'm like, all right, buckle in. And I do it, but they, they, they, they, I just watched the last episode last night and I was like, that's a fucking ending. What, I'm trying to think of what, like, because the movies, the shows that I've watched,

like Sopranos at the time, I was, I didn't even know what happened. Yeah. Deadwood, totally unsatisfied with that ending. Game of Thrones has a- Game of Thrones. I haven't watched the last season. I heard such so awful things about it. Like, people like, don't even bother watching it.

Just, like, be satisfied with the last. They said people that weren't satisfied with it. Yeah, they made a whole subplot about it on, or storyline about it on Carbrianthians. Stranger Things. You know, there was. stuff. Yeah, they're like, there's going to be another episode.

It's hard to do. I hadn't thought about that angle, but you were right. Like, if you're the creators and you hear all this chatter, like, hey, man, they were just teasing us. There's going to be a really good episode coming up next week. Yeah, it would be devastating as the creators or just like, oh, my God. Because you saw how much they put into that last episode. It was nuts. Yeah.

I mean, visually. Yeah, visually, yeah. But it strayed so far from the source of what it was to what it became is. it is startling actually when you watch the first episodes for the last episode it's basically just

all done on green screen yeah I think the shield had a good ending Shield had a great ending yeah shield had a great ending I like the Deadwood ending I mean I know it just got cut off

but yeah that was for me it just like it got cut off and I was like I wanted more What about Breaking Bad did have a good ending? Yeah I think Breakabed had a pretty decent ending So did Betta Call Saul actually

Yeah you're right Yeah there are good endings out there Yeah, you just got to... The bad ones get most of the ink. Yeah. Like how I met your mother or Game of Thrones. Some people didn't like the Breaking Bad ending, though. They're like, he got to die in his own terms.

That's not cool. You know, like, he should have been in jail for the rest of his life. It's like, now you're just talking about, like, what the writers chose. The whole point of the show was a guy who had cancer and was dying. Yeah. What life is he living in prison? Spoiler late, I guess. Speaking of Kansas, you see Bruce Campbell announced he his cancer.

Oh, I didn't see that now. And knocked me into that, that knocked me real loop. He's going to text you, but I figured you probably already got millions of them. I did. I got a bunch of texts, yeah. I know. He says it's not curable, but it's treatable. Okay.

So hopefully it's like one of those blood cancers that they can keep in check for years and years. For years and years. Oh, it was a fucking, it was a hit, though. I was unhappy to hear that. I was hopeful because, you know, he's saying that he's canceling his summer appearances, but he's coming back to do, I guess he's got a new show coming out. Well, he was doing, he wrote and directed a movie, yeah. Yeah, so he's doing the press tour for that.

that so he's taking the time to get healed now. Yeah. Yeah. Hopefully. You know, hopefully. He's only 67. I mean, geez, Louise, man. Let's, let's kick the shit out of this thing.

Yeah, really. So, Squarespace, anyway, Q. Oh. What's up? If you want to get a website done, you need to go to Squarespace. Oh, Squarespace, yes. Hot off the heels of Bruce Campbell. That does suck.

That's just, but it happens more and more like the older you get, the more you see, like, these people that you really, like, love to. and respected. I know. Well, he'd look. He's not dropping off one by one. He's not dropping off. Yeah, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he'll count him out.

He'll, yeah, don't count Bruce Campbell out, man. Not at all. He's just got a bit of a fight at him. It seems like a lot of people fucking hear that news. Yeah. You know, it's like, in the end, everybody, like, dies of cancer. I don't know, man. Isn't that what Dave, Dave, uh, Windorf said that, right?

What? I thought Dave Windor said that on one of, on an episode very early on. He's like, everybody dies of cancer in the end. Squarespace. Squarespace. Yeah. Not that Bruce Camden. That's not where we're going with that.

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We have four today, so I'm just going to do two for right now. Ooh, we. Yeah, I know, man. These advertisers love us. This is Harry's. I can give a personal endorsement because I just used the razor today to shave my cheeks to a nice baby-ass smoothness. They really are smooth. Aren't they, though?

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Yeah. So I think nowadays is when you really want to save money. Where's your barber? Haslapavilion next door. I didn't know you had a barber. Tell your dad did all your shavings. He was, but, you know, when he was unable to do it. When he got ill, you had to find a real barber?

Yeah, yeah. So. He's such an email. He's not recuperator enough that he could shave you? I kind of got used to going over there. So, because they got the, what is it, that, that tow show that what's her name used to do? Jennifer Lopez. Oh, yeah.

Palm Beach towing or whatever. They got that on. Does your father know that you replaced them? Does he know that? Yeah. Really. So when you show up all sleek and smooth and everything, he's like, he kind of like looks down and kicks the dirt. He's like, I guess he did the job.

I guess your dad is Harry's now, huh? Wow, you got to let your dad shave you again. All right, maybe for Q West. Can you shave on stage? I don't know. Maybe we do it like on a side stage. It's a comedy festival. It's like a freak show.

We're paying good money to watch that for 40 minutes. I mean, it's no Ming in a butterfly costume in a conservatory. You're right, it's not. I wish it was. But if we just play, like, whales communicating under the ground. Like, just, like, that's the audio to him shaving you. Every once in a while, you just make a weird noise. Seems like something Yoko Ono would do.

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I've got the other two here. Nice. I'm all sore today. Yes, I'm not surprised. I went ice skating last night for the first time since, I don't know, 2012, I guess. On a comic man, I went to the Devils. Okay, right. Ice arena, the practice arena for that episode.

This was what on a frozen lake? No, at the rink, the local rink by my house. What made you go? My daughter has been ice skating not a lot, but she's been going. for a little bit. She's been going here or there, and she asked me if I wanted to go with her because there was an open skate

at the local rink. And I agreed to go, but I hadn't been on ice skates in quite some time. So I was a little rusty. What they had there was they turned the lights out and they have like loud music playing. Yeah.

And then they have like, I guess, like different color lights flashing. So they kind of make it look like a, like a, almost like a club effect. Yeah, like a disqual, Yeah. Yeah. Right.

So there's literally a thousand, 14 to 15-year-olds. No, no, they are not. But there's like, there's like a hundred kids there all between the ages of being put from 14, probably to 17. And I get on the ice and I'm kind of like finding my bearings again because it's been a while. And I see my daughter come by and she does this amazing. Amazing stop.

Sprails like in his face. Keep up, old man. And I'm like, and I don't have my glasses on. And it's dark. And so I go over. Perfect recipe. I go, what the heck? I go, look at you.

I go, how the hell did you get so good? And the girl's face, like, it looks just like her. Oh, no. And the face of heart of like, of like, a. As I see, I'm like, oh, my God, it's not her. And before I keep saying, oh, I thought you were my kid, she just goes, yeah, and she just takes off. Sprays him with pepper spray. The look that she gave me will haunt me.

Wow. How old was she? She could have been anywhere from 15 to 20. Right. Okay. My daughter looks very young, too. She's in her 20s, but I said to myself when she stopped like that, too, I was like, I go, is had a leash. looks taller than Alicia, but then I was like, gosh, she's on ice skates.

She's a flattigan. She just did her hair where it has a red tint to it. This girl had a red tint. Sure. It looked like, like, I saw my daughter. I was like, did you see this girl over here? She goes like, yeah, yeah, she started laughing. She goes, yeah, she came over to me and it was like nice hair to do or whatever.

And we kind of laughed and we looked at it. Yeah, I thought it was. How about that guy? Yeah. Just being careful. It's a creep of foot. Yeah, he likes red streaks. But holy fuck, though, that look.

y'all never forget that look what do you think was behind the look a pervy old man fucking like I was like oh look at you how did you get so good come here honey let me smell you I'm overly familiar oh it was bad because once you explained it though once you were like oh I'm so sorry I don't she skated away I didn't get a chance I was gonna say that's not something you want to I wasn't gonna chase her unless she reacts automatically with like oh I get it I got a no problem it's not something you want to go into death because here's the reason And it was that, like, that feeling of dread as I was like, oh, my God, it's not her. And the way I just spoke to her was way too.

Too familiar? Yeah, like, look at you. Who is this old man? This weird out. Somebody's all grown up. It was so, so horrible. I'll never forget that look on her face like, my God. Just mortified?

It's like, yes, yeah. Like, I must look like, like, a freaked out, like, even more freaked out looking than, like, Sandusky or something. Like, why's he even on skates? How do you get in here? Yeah. To be fair, I think that's, like, most girls that age are like, ooh, like an old man talk to me. It almost said something to me. I mean, the fact that you did speak in such a familiar way, like, look at you.

I didn't say like that. All grown up is skating around. I was like, oh, my God. God, look at you. I was like, how did you, how the hell did you get so good? And then I was like, oh no. You suck. I meant you suck.

So, and I had to rent skates because my ice skates got washed away in Sandy. Sure. So I don't have any ice skates. I had to rent skates. The first skates they give me, basically they were duller than a fucking cue ball. So I'm like, I'm like, my God, have my skills deteriorated this badly that I can. can't even go an inch without like, it was horrible, but I got another pair of skates. And I got a little bit better skates on not great.

And I started to, you know, warm up. And we were only there for two hours. And my daughter goes, have you fallen yet? And I was like, no, I don't fall, I said. I haven't fallen in years. I said, the last time I fell was the 80s. I was like, you know, I was being all cocky. And then fucking Jonas brothers came on cake, cake on the beach.

and that fucking song gets me going So I was like, I got fucking I had to fucking pick it up a notch And show these kids that, you know, that Old man could fucking still mowed her around And fucking sure enough You know, on the fucking second verse of cake on the beach You went down?

Flat on the face? Not on my face, on my back And my neck Try to make sure my neck doesn't fucking My head doesn't smash it Hit the fucking ice And there's like a trail of blood Right

As you skid to the wall I like trying so badly to keep my head off the ground so I don't hit my head as I know I'm going down. Yeah, my body was sore. Oh, man. Rough. And then there was like, of course, there's like 50 kids who I can skate like fucking the wind playing tag. And they're skating in and out and everybody. And this one kid like tries to stop and then turn back the other way.

and I'm coming. Arms flailing? No, I'm not flailing, but I'm not that good where I could, like, I don't know, like, you do a pirouette and get out of the way. I'm not fucking Brian Botano, but I'm also not fucking get him either. So I can, I have some maneuverability. So when this kid comes flying out, I mean, he's got his head turned, I have to, like, catch him.

And I'm like, oh, my God, I just don't want to touch anything. I shouldn't touch like, save this kid's life. Because I've already fucking. Right. You got a reputation. You already on somebody searching. You already got a rep. Yeah.

I already on a neighborhood watch list already by the time I can leave here. And I'm like, please, God, don't let this kid fucking fall. And we go tumbling down and, you know, and it looks even worse. But, you know, I was able to like fucking just kind of grab them and just throw him to the side. And he's like, oh, thanks, dude. Duder. He said Duter? Yeah.

Oh, cool, man. I was like, I'm Duder now. Not the fucking creepy old fucking pervert. You're not? Let's leave now on a high note, I said. Like Hugh leaving on his laugh At the roast Yeah

Yeah but my neck is like All wrench from trying to fucking keep it up Without hitting the ice the other night Last night Speaking of giving it up Let you have be a great segue It would have been Yeah

I've also been I went back to show Mary Beth all the Planet of the Apes Really? The original Rodney McDowell Original 5 yeah Okay What's the reaction to that?

She likes them She likes her. She didn't like escape that much. Oh, that's one of my favorites. I love the time travel, yeah. I liked it. I thought it was pretty good. But beneath Planet of the Apes, they talk, I didn't realize, because I haven't seen

them in so long, they talk about Baby Hitler. Like talking about going back in time to kill Baby Hitler at one point. Yeah, that would have been the fucking sixth one. The sixth one? Planet of the Apes, you know, versus Planet of the Hitler's. That would have been cool. I would have watched that. Yeah.

Jesus. I would have definitely watched that long. today I'll watch that. I'm like, why don't they make that? I don't know. I love those new Wapes movies. Yeah, they're really, they're done really well too. Underrated. I don't know why they're not as rated as highly as they should be. A lot of affection for the source

material and respect. Yeah. And they didn't shit on it. And they just kind of add it to the mythos and did a really good job. Great job. I mean, two movies, two separate movies were about prison breaks, but both of them were awesome, right? Yeah. The other

thing that I noticed, but I couldn't really bring at the time was how fucking hot is Nova? I mean, holy shit. Again, like... Could you call it Nova for me there? Yeah, she was beautiful. Perfect 70's body. She's never...

Perfect 70's face. What a line. What a gig. She doesn't have to speak. She doesn't have to say anything. Oh, she's that girl, guy. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I got a good picture of her, yeah.

Oh, I remember her. Did you watch a TV show? Got a show or that, too. I never watched a TV show. Is that available? Oh, yeah. Oh, dude, anything's available on the right to this. I don't you know?

Well, to me, it is. It's. Right. They made out to the peons. I'm talking to a god of television. Yeah, look at her, man. Yeah, look at her. Yeah, it's funny because I watched an old Kirk Douglas Western called the Indian fighter,

and he's, you know, it's great. And, of course, there's, like, the chief's daughter, and she's, like, the whitest-looking woman possible. Like, it's all these Indian women's in the, the, love interest is basically just like a white woman with some tanning shit on her. It's so funny. I'm like, she's Italian. Like, what are you doing? Get her out of that.

It's so funny. Was it made in Italy? No, no. I don't even know if she's Italian. She looked Italian, but it was great. Yeah, they made love in a river. I was like, who in the fuck? You know how cold that river is?

Like, this is how I know I'm getting old. I'm like, in that river? Not a chance. Parasites, raccoon piss. You get a river worm up your anus. Yeah, who needs that? And then it's hard to get out. especially back then.

They don't even have the medication. Oh, I think they got to go out when it gave me the Tweezers to get it out. Oh. Pull it out like a loopie. Oh, La Chaney Jr. was in it, too. I didn't realize he did Westerns. Track? Launch, yeah.

Oh, a Wolfman. Okay, Wolfman. Yeah, Wolfman, right. Oh, what use this? This was, look at how big. Get him called the Indian fighter? Yeah, he was a horrific drunk. Oh, yeah.

Launching Junior year. It looked like everybody in this movie had their struggles with alcohol. Yeah, Walter Mathau was in it. Oh, what year? Yeah, 55. It was a killer cast, man. What made you watch this? I was in a bar this week, and it was on with no sound, and it was looked, it was

technical color. Yeah. And it was so gorgeous. I was like, I got to watch this. Those old movies with those colors, man, like, you feel like you're going to leave, like, with radiation poisoning, but they're so riveting because of the colors. It was, it was gorgeous. so I went to you, what's that?

Man, look at that studio. Yeah. And Kirk does this. He's like, how old do you think he is? I mean, I know it's a total year? 40. 48. I'm like, you look 60.

They lived a lot harder back then. They weren't coddled. They were kicked out by their parents in the fucking Great Depression at 9. And they had to find their work. Go chew on dust. Yeah. So they had a much more fucking harsher existence. They sure.

Than a fucking 40-year-old who fucking still lives. Mom and Dad and PlayStation. Yeah. I was thinking, speaking of, did what were we talking about? No, we weren't talking about trains earlier, but I did think that, like, have you ever gotten busy on a train queue? Huh. Because there's a Mile High Club, of course. I have not.

But is there a train equivalent? Well, I mean, yeah, in a way, subways in Manhattan count? No. I'm talking to train. Yeah, like a cross-con. country, like Oriental Express. Like say you're on your way down in Orlando with the wife. Yeah.

Your wife? Not my wife. Say Walt's going down there with his wife. He owes it to us to get busy on a train, I think. I would say so. The Long Club is called. I took a train from California to New Jersey, you know, five days. Do I need a partner to say I join the club?

You can't trick off and say that you join the Mile Long Club. There's not a lot of room in those cars. It's too busy. You know, you got to be, you got to be like David Blaine in a fucking box and shit. Gotcha. Wait, wait, wait, why won't some ways of Manhattan count? I got a reputation that depends here. I think they should.

Yeah. You think so? Yeah. What did you do, diddle? There was mutual diddling. All right. As I recall, this is the St. Patrick's Day, late 90s. Oh, okay.

That makes sense. Diddling a plenty back then. You're lucky Bernie gets stuck and didn't see you. I can put a screwdriver in your neck. I wasn't bothering him. You wouldn't bother me. Oh, no. Yeah, it's disrespectful.

You got a whole crowd of fucking car and you're sitting there. Diddle. Get a little. A mile long club. I'm in. Yeah. Yeah. We've been watching, I have this, this, again, these DVDs that I bought years ago.

Yeah. I'm talking pre-pendemic called the House of Hitchcock. it's like 15 of his most well-known movies. Okay, yeah. And I'm like, I've never watched these. Why not work your way through it? So we start working our way through it and it has those colors, those same super rich, brilliant technical. It's really interesting to watch.

Why don't they make them like that anymore? I don't know. We need someone that knows these things. It's so saturated. Yeah, it looks great. The colors. House of Hitchcock. Yeah, well.

You guys want to bring me all kiddums. Oh, yeah. Oh, I forgot about it. We're having such a cozy conversation. I feel like that. Hold on. Let's read these next two ads and then we can talk about getting. Yeah, let me knock these out.

Stay tuned, internet. You're about to get poned. They're at the edge of their seat right now. I wonder what it could be. I'm shocked. What's the biggest speculation about Gidim? Like what is the things that people are like, it's not true. He doesn't have what?

Oh, autism, right. I see. Oh, well, I thought it was, you know. 146. Okay, yeah. All right. This message is sponsored by Raycon with Spring on the Way. It's a perfect time to refresh your routine and spend more time outside.

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and all that retail markup stuff. Here's some of the features that make them your everyday go-to. Open-ear design. Let you hear your music in the world around you. They are really putting a lot of weight on open-year. You said open-year like seven-time. They are, yeah. Well, this is the new open-ear buds.

Are they the only buds that are open-ear? I don't think so. Let's just say they are. They're just the best. I mean, why would you look anywhere else? Mary Beth hasn't. I've gone for Christmas. You really likes them.

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I know they're focusing on the outdoor activities, but I will tell you, when I go to the buffet, I really like wearing my racons. Why? Because I can watch. He can tron out the fucking sound of him fucking chewing. The rest of the restaurant can't, but at least he can with his open-year recons. Like when the waitress comes over and asks me if I want to refill, I can hear, but I can also keep hearing.

And why can you hear them? Because they're open-the-earges on. Yeah, that's what I was trying to get. There you go. Very good. Cool. Let me see something real fast. Looking up the definition of open ear?

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Who's this? This is Factor. I heard if I was listening to a YouTube video today. I was listening to some music in the shower and a Factor commercial came on. Oh, yeah? It's way better than your read. What do they do differently? Do they talk about open ear?

It just sounds like so much more energetic. It sounds like they're, they've actually tried Factor. It just sounds like, that's what I was looking up. I have my personal endorsement right here. Like the fact that they, they're full of shit though. If that guy gets paid the same amount, we're getting paid. We probably get paid more. It's crime against humanity that that guy puts so much work in this.

The thing about Factor. Hey, he's got it, man. He doesn't have an audience that he built over 16 years. Always fresh never closed. If we can't dial it in now, when can we? Haven't we earned the right to dial it in? Jesus Christ. Did it make you want to jump out of the shower to actually have a factory?

15 years we've been doing this show? I'm just sitting here. The water's coming down my face. I'm like, oh my God, we are fucking piss poor. We're fucking turning in to fucking getting paid for by Factor is criminal as to what this ad read was. The only Factor Listen. Let's turn it around. Let's turn it around.

Let's turn it around. Let's turn it around. Turn it around? Can you, Teddy, turn around? Let's turn it around. There's convenience. Always fresh, never frozen. It's ready in about two minutes.

It comes in a box with the ice packs in it. It keeps you food nice and even in the hottest of days fresh and cold. There's no prep to. Right. Which means there's no stress. Oh, so, dude. Isn't there enough stress in life, Walt, already? Totally.

You know, some say the stress is what keeps you going, no. Really? Yeah. But one thing you don't have to stress about is eating good food. Yeah. This is what you don't want to do with these fucking ham-fisted fucking... Bullshit. Like the guy smiley fucking voice.

It's just so annoying. You know what you don't need? It's just, oh, come on. That fucking radio voice of yours has got to go. Retire it. Please. I'm serious. Do you realize you're doing it or you don't even realize?

You just go right into it? Yeah. As your friend. You know how you go to fake walks? As your friend, as your friend Retired that voice. He says no.

He shakes his friend. It's too valuable. These golden price make me money. Pay my salary. Let me see what Mary Beth. This is a train wreck compared to that guy's read today. It was so energetic.

It was like I just wanted me to run out of the fucking shower nude and just fucking find the nearest fucking store to carry factor. So let's say, Just play his commercial. Yeah, why don't just play it on your phone next time, and we'll just play that. I will. Mary Beth recommends covetopi and meatballs, home-style chicken and gravy, smoky, gutta and Mac.

I know she loves that one, and shredded beef. Shredded beef. What's the difference between shredded beef and beef? Shredded. What do you do with it? It's like a sloppy Joe shred? I think so, yeah. You cook it a little longer.

That's ground beef. Sloppy Joe's. ground beef. So what shredded beef is? It's like pulled pork almost. Yeah, the kind of shit that get them brings. Oh.

For lunch. Except it's beef, not pork. Mmm. Yum. Head to factormeals.com slash T-E-S-D-50 off. You're killing my commercial. Yeah.

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Nice. Can I say something not attached to the ad? Sure. But still about the ad. Like you said. Hold on. Give it a couple seconds. All right.

Eat like a pro. Now, when I hear the phrase eat like a pro, I think of getting him at the fucking at the buffet. That's eating like a pro. Like putting them almost out of fucking business like going in chapter 11 and shit. That's stress. They say you've got to walk through the door. That's stress.

That's eating like a pro. Yeah. Not filling up on empty cars. Just pure meat. Just pure peanut butter and chicken. Yeah. So Giddon went home to his dad's house last week. And he came back with the mother load.

He found all his. No, not all. Well, a big cachet of documents. Oh, really? He went to a psychiatrist when he was a child. Oh. And a lot of the things, like it really, I read the documents and it really opened my eyes to when I'm like, I shouldn't expect anything from this man.

Anything at all. Yeah. Judging from when he was, what, seven? Six and a half. It's questionable whether you should even be employing him. Well. Operation bootstrap. I just think, yeah, expectations have to be lowered.

Wow. Yeah. That was the eye-opener for me. Okay. Yeah. Like, wait, lower than they already are? Yeah, you have to. You have to.

And you have to do it with love. Oh, boy. You've got, like, there's a thing in there that really made me go, holy shit, I've been doing it all wrong because his psychiatrist said he needs to be showered with love to be productive. Not tough love. Not the time of love I've been given. Really? Which has been on the tough side, right? Sure.

For how long now? Can you undo what you've done? I, you have to try. have to start. You just can't be like, we're going to continue banging my head against the fucking wall like he did at six years old and they finally took him to a psychiatrist. But yeah, it really will make you. He scanned them all in. Oh, let's see. Some of them in. And you could see some of them in. And you could see some of the comments by the psychiatrist and.

I guess she was alive today. Can we get her on the show? I think it was a male, right? Probably, yeah. And I doubt that they're alive. Maybe it's possible, but it really was a window into how we have to, all of us, not just me, have to turn it around and take a different approach to our. Shower him with love.

Well, let's bring up some of the documents. trying to go with first. You bring up whatever one you think. And also it reveals his IQ at six and a half. Wow. Okay. Oh, wow. This is real deal old-typed.

Yeah. Can you expand that or come in? 1-4-85 to 78? Oh, no, that's his birthday. It is 85. Yep, 144-85. Behavioral problems. He puts get him in there.

He removed his real name and put get him in there so that you wouldn't make a mistake and call him by his real name. Yeah, of course. But what are some of the highlights? I asked him to highlight some of the highlights he refused to for some reason. Is that too harsh? I'm sorry. You're not showering him. He does not, according to his mother, he does not listen and tends to be manipulative.

Are you sure you're not getting manipulated right now? If I'm going to do this, I cannot take that kind of jaded. Okay. Cynical outlook. I have to be, I have to treat him as if he will wilt. and die without my affection. Okay. And yours.

Stop throwing us in on this. Theresa, I count on my glasses. I left them in the car. Can you read some of the comments on there? Yeah. Is it too... He's an active child. And according to his mother, he does not listen.

It tends to be manipulative. Getham has never had any seizures. General health is good. Early milestones were apparently unremarkable. What does that mean? I don't know. You didn't crawl, right? I crawled two days past my nine-month birthday.

I thought you went right to almost walking. Yeah, yeah, I didn't, yeah. Okay, here we get it. I did the same, get him. You know, Kendrit Souls. He was distractible, and he had a little difficulty with short-term memory tests in both the auditory and visual modulity, but when asked to pay attention and when the directions were repeated, he was then able to complete the test successfully. This did not seem to create any frustration for him. It was just getting a matter of him to attend.

And then it ends. So that's the one remarkable one, right? Except for some mild distractibility, which then resulted in some difficulty with short-term memory tasks, is unremarkable. He required no further neurodiagnostic tests. I see no evidence of neurological impairment on this exam. So he's not autistic. Wait a minute. Well, where's the documents that show all your problems?

This is a woman. It's a woman, Dorothy. Well, this is, this, so what happened was they had me, they put me through a battery of tests. Sure. Because I was having trouble in first grade. Yeah. Where's the one where you urinated on all the kids? That's the one we want to see.

Yeah, that's the, that's the fucking, that was the different one. You didn't scan that one? No, because it has a staples in it. So I couldn't have feet it through the skin. Oh my God. So what? You can't take the table down. Take a picture of your phone to put it up there.

That's an insane fucking document. Well, like, about how you urinated on everybody. You just peed on other kids? Apparently, I. Apparently. I convinced kids to hold their hands out and I peed on them. Oh. So whose fault is it then?

That's my question. So this is my, this is the psychiatric evaluation. Okay. Here's where you're going to really be like, oh my gosh. Get him a six and a half years old. First is referred to by his child study team because of a history since nursery schools of impulsiveness, distractibility, calling out easy, easy loss of control, difficulty with following directions and difficulty with a, authority figures.

That's why he fucking... He sounds cool. No, that's why we're budding heads. Like, I'm the authority figure. Right. Yeah, that's why he, like, he kind of acts out. He kind of... He wants a rebel.

That's my prize my favorite. Wow. Okay, I see what you're getting at here. But giving that we see that Gettam has adjusted it, can I believe these numbers? I need to see the piece of paper. He has a 144 gifted IQ with an even pattern of border. orderline auditory memory on the Whisker and Detroit. I don't know what that means.

With superior scores in all other areas, abstractions of all types and comprehension are extremely high. He has on or above grade academics with normal visual motor skills. He has previously been thrown out of day camp. And then it's all this redacted shit. He didn't crawl all that much as a child. Weird, right? That they would put that as something they would put in the report?

But why is ill of this stuff redacted? It's about my family. It's about his parents. I understand. Okay. Now can we say that you've mentioned that your father's no longer married, right? Yeah, yeah. So the psychologist claims it was very traumatic for his mother and father to separate.

I mean, it's dramatic for every job. But you say it really wasn't that, right? Not that I remember, but that's just, you know, going back on when I remember. You don't, you didn't feel there was any kind of major trauma or emotionally for you when they broke up. No, like I don't, I don't believe, I didn't believe it was because of me. So. Right.

Yeah, which I think is what I would associate the trauma with people is that they, you know. They think it's because I was in, like through fourth or fifth grade, like I was in special groups for divorce children. Really? Yeah. They had spent, they group kids as the children of divorce. Yeah. That's pretty progressive. Why, though?

Maybe so they can all relate to each other. That was like third through fifth grade in union. So this is Mill Stone, which is Monmouth County. That's when we were up. I was up in Union. So it was like a support group or you guys would tell stories about? Yeah. What would you talk about?

Like, I was just mostly listening because I didn't under, you know, just trying to reach, trying to find something that like these other kids were talking about. You know. You didn't have any stories. I had fighting stories of me, you know, my mom screaming and yelling, that kind of stuff. Who doesn't? The pillow thing? Yeah.

I don't know if I brought that up. That would be story one, man. You would have been the prize people. I don't think that's part of the divorce. Okay. Yeah, it's not a divorce story. But the 144 IQ at six. Yeah.

It's not 148, but it is 144. It's only six. I should note that this is only one of the, I had the same thing when I went to union schools because I got transferred to my third grade because my custody went to my father. So then we switched to. union schools and then at the end of third grade beginning of fourth gradeish I had the same exact thing happen again you know how vain Gidemis yes he when he talked about talking about this

on the show I was kind of teasing them about how like you know you're not 148 you're 144 you know you got to get rid of all your jerseys all your fucking stickers that's how he 148 and he goes well we could just change it to 148 and make my life simple he wanted to change the number That's how vain he was. Like 144 wasn't... Not high enough. Not high enough. I don't even know that.

I need to see the original. You don't believe... You could take my word for it. Yeah. This is legitimate documentation. This is not bullshit. Okay. All right.

You did not fudge these. Well, it's right there. Then black and white. 144. And this is the first of many IQ tests. Again, I've never seen this before like a week ago. What also says here that you wait, your bed. You can't ride a bike.

I can now. Get him often says he can't do it. What? Anything. Sugar can increase his activity level. Oh yeah, that's every kid. All right. Gettum made a spaceship out of blocks in my waiting room. It was very creatively done. He needs

quiet to function. His imagination and thought processes are always active. He drew and a race often and consistently added to a Pac-Man interpretation. He makes noises while working. So does Sage Sage.

Sage is constantly making noise while sitting there doing anything it's like like making noise and shit. I think the next line's appropriate. He's isolated from other classmates. Schoolwork is boring. No, I don't know about that.

I don't like school and work. Oh, I don't like, yeah, get him just not like school and work. He just likes to be by himself and sleep. Yeah. Something has changed. Yeah, nothing else. Nothing has changed in 40-some years. No, I guess not, man.

He is still in the exact same... Dan, the... Mind. Like the same mindset. What do you mean? He doesn't really want to do anything but sleep. Well, he has a job. He doesn't like it.

Again, I'm going to be loving. I'm going to be loving and let that fucking line go that, you know, and not comment in a way that I know what would in the past. Yeah, but he's such a guy that feels... He has this weird fake honor thing. He has these weird fake morals that he likes to say. He has these weird belief in, like, rules that he, that, and none of it's true. Yeah.

As soon as they, as they don't apply to him or, or make his life a little bit difficult, then all of a sudden. Out the window. Yeah. Out the window. Then those, those, that rigid, that rigid mindset becomes very pliable. Yeah. Loyalty. Honestly, they go right out the window.

The second it means he's got to do something. I got you. But the fact that you can't get that back. room clean? Yeah. This is why. And you got to just be like, you know what? I don't care about that back room.

That's not the way. No. That's bad. What's the way then? The way is the only way to fix it. I want to hear this. What the way is. Buy or get him and get someone else in that will do what they're getting paid to do.

We're not doing it. We all know we're not doing it. So what's the point? But like that's the only way to do it. He's had a billion chances. Okay. Okay, but that's, yes, that is the way. But I meant what is the way where he is still?

There is no way. Yeah. There's no way. Can you just, like, love him so much? I do love him. I love him so much. No, you're, I'm talking about on a level that has never been seen between two men. Like, he's moving into your house.

Yeah, no. Like, I don't mean sexually. Again, I know you go, you know, tampon talk and everything. I just mean, like, you treat him like, like, like, like, that. like your brother on like. I don't treat any of my friends like that. Why is he the one that gets treated like that? The fucking son-

What about what we need? What about what I need? You got what you need. You know you got it. You got it in Spain, motherfucker. That doesn't look like a fucking explosion happened. You really don't need that. You really don't need it.

You know you don't need it. It's not true. You don't need it. You need to make him feel like he's the prince in your fucking kingdom. How? How could we do it any more than it is? I think there's, I think you've been kind of on snooze control in terms of like, it's a lot of words. I love you, but I don't know if he feels the love. But he gets to keep doing what he does.

His actions are he gets his inactions need you to act. You need more action. That's what you need to do. The more in action he presents. You got to work harder. He says himself as this fucking guy who likes what's right is right and loyalty and the honor and follow the rules. When does he ever said that? Why he won't take things down on Reddit?

Because it's not right. I'm not a dictator. Like stuff like that. He likes to present himself this way. But he's not that way. But he costs at the end of the day, if he has to take it down, it's work. Then he has to monitor it on a much more like regular basis and be like, oh, I have to make decisions. He doesn't want to make any decisions.

He doesn't want to make any decisions. He also doesn't want to be told what to do. Yes. So where does that leave us? You just got to love him. Love him harder than you have been. You already love the guy. No, that is just talk.

I need to see it. I need to see it. But I haven't seen it. He's having them down the Q West. Yeah. I think he needs a week at Chateau Q, man. Yeah. Where you just like,

No. Like you make him feel like the most special boy on earth. No, I don't know that is. You should be like Michael Jackson. Let me watch. Let me watch you by learning from you. I look, man, I put most of the time in anybody here with this fucking guy. Sure, but now you know you have to step it up.

I think he, I think I'm the authority figure. You're not the authority figure for him. You're the celebrity figure. You're the cool celebrity uncle. Okay. That comes in every once in a while with like, oh, here's fucking. something that somebody gave me that's worth a thousand dollars you could just have it get him because i don't want it yeah i can't do that i don't have that kind of juice i come in and i'm

like hey asshole why the fuck is this not done yet yeah and you come in with like oh look hey you want this get him somebody sent to me i don't want it but you can have it right and he just looks at it like all stargazed but that's not like what more can i give the guy um like if your approach isn't working if my approach isn't working where is the where's the approach that word you got to come in with more like it's not with physical gifts. It's got to be emotional now. You got to connect on a level with... And what do you see

being the end result of me showering with love? Where does it get us? If I said an immaculate back room. Yeah. Oh. Yeah. I think it could lead to an immaculate back room at one...

With years of trying? No, you don't? Yes, I do. It's not. It's so many of it. believe that. You can't. I think if he leaves your place after a week being like, Oh, that's a week. He's not going to my place where you just like every, like, every day is like, what was that, Never, Neverland? Yeah. Like if you bring in a monkey and you bring in a little petting zoo,

every day is an adventure for a week, I don't see how you could come back to the office and not clean it. Yeah. What if, what if it's during the warm weather and you just let him stay outside by the pool? Like he doesn't have to come inside. I mean for a week. Yeah. You have a pool? What's my house? Because he wants to come visit you.

You got to show him the love. Wait, wait. Let's talk about J. Bride's role and all this. I don't know if he's capable. Yeah. I don't know. I don't know.

I think he's got... I think we work on Gatim first, then we take our attention towards what Brian is. Yeah, all right. I like that. I'm coming over, Q. You come over for a week. Oh, man.

Well, show him the thing about the love About the evaluation where he, what you need is affection. Where's that? Riddle in trial. That was not like super common back then, I don't think, in the 80s, right? No, no. Rarely prescribed. You must have been real fucked up.

Oh, yeah. Yeah, like he was probably a lot worse than we even can imagine. Well, we know he was because all the stories from the camp were, horrible. Well, that was 10 years later. He was a teenager. Yeah. Decade later.

Where's that urination one? Told you. You didn't bring that? You didn't bring that one? Who the fuck used comic sands? Yeah, that's weird. Well, brought that up, too. Oh, the font?

Yeah. How do you type that? I don't know. What type does they even sell back? Can you zoom in on that? It's from 84. All right, three-step evaluation. Yeah, this is where it gets.

real. Possibility of severe he found, the doctor found after a three-step evaluation he found the following. One, possibility of severe neurotic conflict manifesting itself as autistic and behavioral problems caused by explosiveness. You hear that sound? That's the sound of the internet getting poned as they all fucking

smacked our forehead and be like, holy shit. He is retarded. He is autistic. I've been amazing. This is the third doctor. That's confirmed it. Third doctor, number three. The fucking hat trick of fucking disabilities right there. Okay, number two, the possibility that get him is suffering from a neurological deficit should be followed through fully. And my recommendation would be a full psychological's neuropical workup.

What Halstead, neuropsychological battery for children, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, being given as a must in that particular test. I don't know what any of that means. Can you imagine like you adopt a kid and this is the fucking lemon that you get? Jesus Christ. Yeah. But it's get him. You got to love him, dude. Yeah.

It's true. Possibility of schizophrenia. Yeah. How can you expect him? He's ruling it out. They're ruling it out. Oh, they're ruled it out. Okay.

All right. Schizophrenic. The family situation when the mother and father leading divorce has caused a great deal of trauma and get him. It should be continually monitored. But why is it worse for him than anybody his parents? In fact, why is it worse for him that parents have stayed together?

Yeah. Tell me about it. I'm traumatized. The family's been cooperative. That's nice. The possibility of medication should be kept apparent. Do you think that's why you don't throw anything out because you saw your parents throw their vows out? No, I think that started way later.

Do you worry about? I'm not sure. I've tried to pinpoint when that started. Do you worry that the people in your life will drift apart because your parents drift apart? I think I just kind of expect it. You expect everybody to drift away? Yeah. How long do they need to stay in your life before you feel any sort of sense of like, well, they're not drifting away?

I mean, my God, they've seen the worst of me and they're still here. I think anybody... Who you're talking about? I think anybody could drift apart in any given time. There is really no... There's no, okay. Yeah. Well, what can you do?

A guard is like... Yeah. He seems almost like... I think you got to enjoy it while you can. Are you enjoying it? What? My relationships with people. Are you enjoying it?

What? It. My relationships of people? Yeah. Yeah, I tried to enjoy them while they last, yeah. I just wonder about Gettom. This is what I think about it, get him in the cold dark of the night when I think about Gettom. Where, you know, recently we had to have an uncomfortable conversation with them.

Yeah. And I walked away from that being like, what is this guy going to do if this goes away? that's where you come in his whole his whole social circle uncle ke is the only one that could take him everything everything good in his life comes from from this not everything but you know what i mean and to be so cavalier and careless with it to be like i don't have to do with what they want me to do to be to be like i don't have to act the way that they want me to act to be like to be like it doesn't matter is is not i don't know if that the fucking moves of a guy who is everything to lose Oh, he's still alive, huh?

No, he's dead. Oh, he's a bitchman. Okay. Even now I'm talking to him, he's looking about bitituaries. I think that's an indication, though, of like how... It was something I was asked to do before. The spot on his brain. Yeah.

But even that, that's what he does. But he argues. He comes back. But this is why. Yeah, you can't remove that spot. And now how much you fucking try to rub it out. Let's say recently we had to be like, sorry, yeah, you got to go. Yeah.

What would his wife be like? What would have happened? I think he, I think he... finds another circle to get into. It might not, it might be a while before he finds it. But he'll, it's not like, he's, I mean, I don't want to equate it to a cockroach, but you, they're survivors. There are certain people that just make their way.

Well, I don't think he would starve to death in a fucking, you know, but I just mean like he would lose so much to lose his whole, well, I guess it's not like he would lose his whole social circle. He would still be friends with the people, but he wouldn't see them nearly. as much. No, and that's how those disconnects. That's how people start drifting away. So to me, if I was him, I'd be like, I got to do everything I can to keep this job and keep this lifestyle

I got. But he doesn't seem to have that at him. So if just cleaning that back room would be an indication for you? Yeah. I mean, doing what you were told to do at work. Yeah, I guess it would be an indication. This again, you know, we're back with the overflowing

trash cans and stuff like that. Like, I mean, that is literally an overflowing trash can. It is. With nothing but Twix rappers and fucking shit piled over it. Like, what is going on? It's a trash can now.

I know. But at least it's the stuff is that... All over the side of it. There's wrappers over here. Yeah, there's stuff all over the floor. Yeah. It's just like, what is it? So have you told them that you want,

don't you like... Oh, somebody out there could find the fucking footage of us talking about those garbage cans because that was the thing like two years ago that was an issue. You come in every... week the same garbage is in the fucking garbage cans. And now we're back at it. And now the back room isn't clean. Show him that love thing again.

Yeah. Show him that. The doctor says he needs to be shower with love. You're right. This is why I can't do it. Why? Because it's not helpful to him to believe. But you're not willing to do what the doctor said then.

That's basically what you're, what you're saying is. What a doctor's 40 years ago said? Can we get the evaluation now? Those credentials don't mean anything in 2026. No. No. Well, they might, but like he's not the same fucking purr. He's the roots of the bitter tree that we see growing now.

But that is a weird mindset, though, that you're told, well, you're given the doctor's recommendation what you need to do. And you're like, no, I'm not going to do it. Right. Well, I don't know. That's like, that's counter conducive. Counterproductive? to solving, I think, the problem, though. But the problem, so you think if we shower him with love, suddenly the garbage cans are cleaned.

Yeah, I do. Suddenly, okay, all right. Yeah, and again, it just can't be words. It's got to be actions. Yeah, but what does that mean? He's not coming to my house. I didn't shower another man with love. You know what it means.

I don't. It means, like, daily check-ins. Check-ins with text, like, and not just like, hey, bud, how you doing? And then you don't answer for four or five days. Wait a second. I'm his best friend. And that's what happens to me. That's what I'm talking about.

Like, you can't do that with you and me, but like he's got to be much more dialed in with him. I can't do it. You can do it. You can do it. You won't do it. You won't do it. I guess they're the same thing. Let's go to my therapist and get the reasons why I can't do it.

And let's bend to those. Young Q. Yeah. Why are we bending to him? That's a way worse shape than you are. You got a great life. He's got a great life. He could be a lot better.

But he's indeed, it could be a lot worse, as my point. It could be. Yeah. But this is what, this is what you're doing now. You're like, you're almost like him. It's almost like I'm dealing like a planet of the getums. It's like everybody around me is so fucked up. It's like, here's what the doctor says to do.

And everybody's like, no. I'm not going to do that. It doesn't make any sense. All right, give me some concrete ways. Give me some tips that don't involve him at my house. Okay. Just more. real check-ins, not like how you doing today.

Like really be like, what are you doing today? Like, what did you do and how'd that make you feel? And what can I do to, to help you? You can't do any of this. You can't do any of this. Why? Why can't you do that? You're busy.

I have, what's it, ADHD? There's what I mean? I have my own issue. To be just dialed in so much that you're like, like yesterday we went to look at a house. Yeah. Last night, like, you could spend a couple hours on the phone talking to him about what was wrong with the house. A couple hours.

I did. Right? You could ask him about where was it? What was wrong with it? What was good? I can't do any of that. Damn, we're never, it's never going to improve then. It's never going to improve.

I'm not talking about two hours a night. No. Well, a couple hours a week then. I'm here with them. It's baby steps. A couple hours a week. Baby steps. How about this?

How about this? I'll start coming in a little earlier and leave a little later to get a little get-em time in. FaceTime. So if we're recording at four, I'll come at like 3.15. What do you think about that,

gettum? Do you think that's just like pandering? Oh, fuck. Gotta try harder. Like when you text me about the like... It's like when a teacher asks you do a 200-page, a 200-word essay to give them like 201. Yes. But like how you text me like inane stuff about like you hear a commercial and you text me about it,

you don't text Q because you're like there's a feeling of like he doesn't care, right? You want to, you want to eliminate that. I don't. Right. But you want to eliminate him thinking that no matter how. Not I care about commercials? No matter how frivolous or. boring or meaningless.

Yeah. His thought is you should be hanging on it and making it the most important thing in your life and whatever he's thinking of in the moment. I do text him and then he tells me it was the wrong number. Just given a shot. It says he's not delusional or hallucinatory. So why would he believe any of this?

Well, I don't think it's because you show him that you are doing what the doctor said. You're showing him that love that you boast about and say, I do love him. Yeah. But you're actually showing him through actions now that, like, it's not just hollow, empty words. Okay. So what do you think's easier for me to do? I don't care what's easy for you.

At this point, yeah. We're not worried about Q anymore and what's easy for him. Fuck, those days are done. You had a fucking 15 years of what's easy for Q. Right. Now it's about what's best for get him. Okay. All right.

It sounds like it's coming down to either me or get him leaving this podcast. Oh, my, we got to get a real psychiatrist in here and just. And that's not just about you. There's something really, like, concerning about a man who's just like, I can't text more than twice a week. You know, that's, yeah. Yeah. Like, there's something like a disconnect between your boy. First of all, you just said talk two hours a night and he just brought that down to two texts a week, which, by the way, I can't do either.

I got no more time for texting. All right, then, I guess it's just all I mean. How about this? How about this? Yeah. Okay. Okay. I think that this will be a meaningful compromise.

I think Gidim and I should become pen pals. and literally write and mail letters to each other. Now that is a, that is, that takes time. Yeah, why is this somehow? Because it changes communication to like now something's coming in the mail. Because you know, you know,

he won't do it. And then you don't have to do it. Why? Why won't you do it? Because I know him, he's not going to do it either. You wouldn't, you wouldn't, Ben Powell me? No, as long as you don't mind to be typewritten. No, I don't mind to be in typewritten. So like this way we, you know, it's,

and we have a record of it. We, you know, we have the letters to each other. it becomes a unique, beautiful bonding thing. Much more impactful than a phone call? I think so, yeah. Really? It's thought of it's more time consuming. You got to sit down.

You got to write something. Let's say he's spiraling and he's got to write a letter and wait for it to fucking arrive and wait for you to read it. Well, that's what he's got to respond. Then put it in the fucking put it in the mailbox. By that time. He's feeling better. Yeah. Come on.

I think it's nice. I like it. There is something about typewritten letters. Oh, yeah. Letter in the mail. Love it. He's great. You fucking junk mail and shit and garbage.

You pull it out. You read it. You think about what the composing is. It's a real thoughtful thing, you know? You know, text, your phone goes off. You take a hit on the volcano. You look at it. You're like, I'll answer it later.

Next thing, you know, four days goes by. Everybody's complaining about you. What were you doing yesterday? What did you do yesterday? Friday. What did I do Friday? find Girl Scout cookies. No, it just worked.

I just didn't work. Where'd you work? From home. So there's no reason then like on those days that you couldn't have come with us to check out this house. Well, nobody invited me. Right. Well, we assume that you're like you're really busy. Well, you know what they say about assume.

So. Yeah. This house fucking burned down. I was there. Yeah. Yeah. But you could expect then a much more. We happened to pass them by.

Aggressive. You could expect a much more aggressive. reach out to attend more things that are meaningful in Giddam's life. Okay. Is a Q welcome at the buffet? Oh, yes. Yeah? He was welcome at the hospital too.

Yeah, that's true. All right. So that's what we're going to make an effort to be more. Yeah, inclusive of me. Yes, yeah. Inclusive of you. and maybe not a crazy amount, but just more meaningful moments.

And how long do you think that translates into empty garbage cans and cleaned offices? Quicker than you might imagine. Like within a week, you think? Quicker than you might imagine. All right, okay. The trash can does get emptied on Sundays. If you recorded this on Sunday,

you wouldn't have nothing to say, get them, Q. Was this a bright and early Monday morning? Yeah, no problem. That would have been a clean can for your information. Because I sort through it, I take out all the recyclables. And then everything else to do that. I know. Wow.

Is that it for the papers? What was the urination? Yeah, where's you peeing on people? That's like you said. Didn't you do that too, though? I didn't do it. My cousin did, though, Sean. Peat on people?

He pees pissed on people in the past. With their permission? No. just like from above. When he was young he did it once, I remember. Yeah, like he was on stairs and he pissed down on some kid. And then when he was at a party, I thought you had a girl piss in your hand.

Oh, yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Well, that's different. Is it? You got to pay for that. It's still a fucking perversion. Tried it out, didn't like it. It's still a deviant behavior.

I don't know. You don't get so judgmental about that sort of thing. You never know who was listening. Well, it was, well, it wasn't. and girls. It was in the boys' room. We'd get them. Oh, it was?

You let any girls piss on you? Ew. Nothing to remember. Again, I really don't remember it. Classroom behaviors is another report. Sorry. I'll cut it. I'll cut it.

At school through numerous September 194, this examiner became a kiddum's difficult. This is a school through numerous conferences of the teacher. Classroom behaviors reported are walking

around room talking to and disturbing others. Okay, loud noises went out of his desk. At times, angry when asked, I mean, they're describing an asshole. Yeah. This is, this is an asshole. This asshole's walking around the room talking,

bothering everybody. He's fucking making loud noise at his desk. You ask him to keep it down. He gets fucking angry. You ask him to line up after class. The guy fucking runs away. He rolls around on the floor while you're talking to him. He's looking at the other kids' desk and handling their belongings.

And he has some boys to hold out hands and urinate on them in the lavatory. Like, you're like, this is an asshole. I don't even want this kid in my class. Are you a late and homosexual? No. Are you sure? Regular homosexual. We would still love.

Yeah, it don't matter. Yeah, if that's the case, because you want to urinate on boys. Is that like maybe? Or was it just convenient? I have no recollection of this incident, yeah. You would, we would never hold it against you. It would be fine. We would never tease you about it.

This is bullshit, dude. Everything you're saying doesn't make sense. A chart with checks for good behavior they gave him. They gave him stickers for work completed and positive comments to get him. We're initiated by the teacher for brief periods of time. See how much good it did. It didn't do any good. Some slight improvement has been noted from time to time in the classroom.

When get him as calm and attentive, he responds and participates appropriately. Other times, he is disruptive, defiant, and does not obey rules. Where's the one about the love? Why doesn't he have to obey rules? Why doesn't he have to obey rules? His brain is broken. Everybody's brain is broken. I don't want to follow the fucking rules.

Does that mean that I just don't have to? Just roll around on the floor a little bit. Yeah, he's capable of it, though. Well, I mean, he has a history of showing he's not, though. Documented by a doctor. You are right. You are right. Where's that one about where I got to shower you at love?

Or did you just make that one up where it said. Again, because of the staples, I couldn't really scan the doctor. So this is the only, the front page and it messed up when I'm scanned it. So that's why there's only one page of it. Well, you can, you can, I'm not just going to throw my hands up, get him, and be like, I can't do it. I'm going to, I'm going to love you. Like, you've never been fucking loved. I'm going to try.

I'm going to try. Yeah, like, you've, you've told a. And that starts with no more bullshit, then, no more, like, ganging up on them and fucking. Oh, come on. No, really. Like, we could tease him, like, playfully, but, like, sometimes it gets too far, and we got to stop that. Got to handle with kid gloves, huh? Not kid gloves.

You know, like, I still think he likes to be one of the guys and kind of get his balls busted, but there's times where, like, you've taken it too far, Brian. I'm sorry. I'll try to shower him with more love. Yeah, what is Brian's role in all this? Why is this a little fool-in-offee? I'm an observer. Well, you can't expect it. This is what Ryan at the table.

On project, too. Yeah, he's like, yeah, you get this working. Then we'll get, yeah, we'll go to project too. I'll have to go look up my old form for my doctors and stuff. What they got. Teachers. All right. So this is a new.

Can we ask the audience for help on this? Can we ask the listeners, the aunts? How can they help? Maybe they can shower get them at love. I think. Historically, that hasn't been the case. I know, but we're all pulling together as a family. I think if it was to have.

It would mean more, but I think if on our prodding, I think it won't be as impactful to get them to field because now you've asked the ants to do it. So then they're like, you know, I think if it had happened. You got to fake it to you make it. But you know what? I think the love of the men in his life is going to mean a lot more than the than some listener accolades. Yeah. Yeah, what do you covet more, get him? Man love or woman love?

Just love in general. Yeah? It doesn't matter. It doesn't matter, huh? All right. He doesn't see sex. I bet. Is that true getting him?

You don't see sex? He's almost an amaphrodite, right? Right? You don't care about it if it's... Tell him Steve Day. Wow, man. He wants a puppy. Oh, here we go.

Three wishes were $100, 1000 puppies, and a fur coat for me to be nice and warm. It's fucking Cruella de Ville over here. He also said that Benji, a teddy bear was his favorite toy, and I love him. When asked about his dreams,

he said he did not dream. But when he goes to bed, he thinks about ghosts that might come into his bed after he goes to sleep. This sounds like Sage. It sounds exactly like this shit, Sage. Oh, he also said he has no friends.

That's sad. But that, is different. Keep going. Oh, yeah, Reed. I don't know I'm not mean. I like to run after girls and kiss them. All right.

There you go. One normal thing about them. It's sad to think you're not having friends, you know, I don't like it. But that is so different from a six-year-old get them to now, though. Now you have more friends than you can shake a stick at. You got the Yentas.

You got us. You know, you don't have a thousand puppies, but you got Teddy. Tedie. He's more intense than that. thousand puppies. Yes. That sucks.

I'm sure I got a hundred bucks. Now we just got to get him that fur coat. This Christmas, someone's getting a fur coat. I got my friend. You're going to look like fucking. Joe Namath. You can put that in, maybe.

You can put that in, maybe see if you can secure us a fur coat. I won't get a real fur coat. Okay. Foe? Yeah, I'll get him a faux coat. Oh, yeah. I'll get him a faux coat.

Oh, yeah. But I'll get him a faux coat. throwing on them. Yeah, maybe for Christmas this year, I'll get them a faux, a faux coat. There you go, man. It's going to be a different. 2026, by the time 20206 ends, you're going to be like, there's, I'm tired of getting so much love here in a site.

Can you guys please go back to busting my nuts? That's how bad it's good, or how good it's going to be. All right, I'm in. I'll try. Me too. I don't know what I'll do, but I'll try. Tell him, Steve, Dave.