Ten Minute Bible Talks Devotional Bible Study - 4 Ways God Uses Friendship | Historical Books | 1 Samuel 23:15-18

Episode Date: May 13, 2025

How does God use friendship to lead us to him? What is friendship all about? Are you a needy friend? In today's episode, Tanya shares how 1 Samuel 23:15-18 encourages us to sow real friendship, so that we might reap its eternal rewards. If you're listening on Spotify, tell us about yourself and where you're listening from! Read the Bible with us in 2025! This year, we’re exploring the Historical Books—Joshua, Judges, 1 & 2 Samuel, and 1 & 2 Kings. Download your reading plan now. Your support makes TMBT possible. Ten Minute Bible Talks is a crowd-funded project. Join the TMBTeam to reach more people with the Bible. Give now. Like this content? Make sure to leave us a rating and share it so that others can find it, too. Use #asktmbt to connect with us, ask questions, and suggest topics. We'd love to hear from you! To learn more, visit our website and follow us on Instagram, Facebook, and Twitter @TenMinuteBibleTalks. Don't forget to subscribe to the TMBT Newsletter here. Passages: 1 Samuel 23:15-18

Welcome to 10-minute Bible Talks, where we connect the Bible to your life. In the time it takes to get to work. I'm Tanya Wilmeth. Today's podcast is about biblical friendship and 1st Samuel chapter 23, David and Jonathan. But I want to start out first by just telling you a story about a couple of really good friends. In the 1960s, a California friendship was built on a shared passion, climbing. Yvonne Shinar, founder of Patagonia, and Doug Tompkins, founder of the North Face, didn't start out as climbers, though.

They met as surfing buddies, and they opened a hot dog stand to keep themselves financially afloat. But when surfing got a little redundant, they decided to chase a new thrill into the granite walls of Yosemite. There they began climbing El Capitan, and they soon realized that guiding others up the mountain could be more profitable than selling hot dogs. So they started charging clients to go on guided climbs. That shift presented a new problem. climbing gear wasn't widely available or suited for their needs, so Channard and Tompkins became blacksmiths by trade. They forged their own carabiners by hand.

When Yosemone began to feel like work too, they set off on a legendary escape to the mountains of Argentina and Chile, an area that we now know is Patagonia. They spent months adventuring and climbing in regions that at the time were untouched by civilization. And when they returned home, those experiences inspired the birth of both of their brains. Pategonia and the North Face were founded to meet the real needs they experienced while they were there, gear that was warm, windproof, impacable for climbing in harsh remote places. Though they went on to develop separate iconic brands, their friendship remained central throughout their lives. Both men eventually saw business as a means to a greater purpose, though. They began to reject the idea of chasing profit for its own sake, believing instead that

companies should reflect a vision of sustainability and that they should be good environment mental stewards. And over time, their friendship became a shared call toward that end. Tomkin sold his stake in the North Face and a spree, a company he ran with his ex-wife, and he moved to Chile. And there he started a foundation where he purchased and protected millions of acres of wilderness, which he later gifted back to the Chilean and Argentinian governments to form national parks. Meanwhile, Shenard was still in the U.S. He was busy transforming Patagonia into one of the world's most environmentally responsible companies. And together, they challenged each other to do more, to be better, to take care, protect the world that they so deeply loved. Their friendship wasn't just built on a

shared passion, but actual love for one another, brotherhood. Shannard described Tompkins as his conscience and the brother I chose. And when Tompkins died in a Kigy accident in Patagonia in 2015, Shannard said it felt like losing part of himself. Their friendship is a powerful example of how true friendship can sharpen, can challenge, can inspire us to live for something greater than ourselves. We may not start nationally known brands or create national parks, but we experience the same beauty and benefits that come from meaningful friendship. Did you know, people with strong relationships actually live longer, healthier lives? According to the Mayo Clinic, adults with high-quality relationships experience, a 17% reduction in depression, a 20,000, a 20,000,

4% reduction in risk for heart disease and stroke. And get this one, a 70% reduction in cognitive decline. That one really speaks to me. From a biblical perspective, friendship is central to a life of joy, steadfast faith, and Christ-like growth. David and Jonathan are one of the most well-known examples of godly friendship. When David was hiding from Saul in the wilderness, he needed encouragement and support. God provided that through Jonathan's friendship. From their story in 1st Samuel 23, we can observe four ways God uses friendship to reflect his relationship with us. The first way is physical nearness.

Verse 16 says Jonathan went to David at Huresh. Now this was a big deal because he didn't let fear or inconvenience keep him away from the wilderness. Godly friendship doesn't shy away when things are hard. It draws near, just as God draws near to us. This is a picture of how God deals with us. Through Christ, he stepped into our wilderness and drew near to us. Now, this is really important today because we're in a digital age where text and social media pass for relationships and connection.

And physical nearness matters more than ever. A face-to-face conversation, a hug, a hand on the shoulder, a walk, these things are powerful reminders that we are not alone. They don't solve every problem, but they embody the truth that someone is with us in our problems. Godly friends shadow as best we can this side of heaven the way God draws near to us. Friendship isn't always about having the perfect words, but it is about presence. So put down your phone, leave it at home, go see your friend. Tell them with your time and your actions, you matter. I'm with you. And more importantly, God is too. The second way friendships reflect

God's good relationship with us is consistency. Jonathan's loyalty to David didn't wait even though his own father wanted to kill David. Jonathan didn't get upset and run away when things got complicated. He didn't diss himself to protect his reputation. Instead, he stayed with David. And he kept showing up. And when he did, he helped David find strength in the Lord, reminding David that the truest source of hope and salvation are not in our circumstances or our strength, not even in our friendship, but in God himself. This kind of consistency is rare, but it's beautiful. It reflects the heart of Christ who promises never to leave or forsake us. Jonathan didn't just offer words. He offered his consistent presence, his courage, and his trust in

God's promises. He stood by David when it hurt when it was risky, when things were uncertain. Godly friendship doesn't run away when things get hard. It chooses faithfulness over convenience. It reminds us who we are and who God is when we're too tired to remember on our own. So in a world where people seem to pull away when things get uncomfortable, consistent friendship can reflect the steadfastness of God's love. The third way that friendships can reflect God's relationship with us is through hope. When Jonathan reached David at Hresh, he didn't minimize the reality of David's situation. David was on the run.

David was living in the wilderness. David was hunted by Saul. David was very uncertain of his future. Jonathan didn't pretend everything was fine. but he did help put David's fear inside the bigger story. He said, don't be afraid. My father, Saul, will not lay a hand on you. You will be king over Israel. Well, how could he say that? Jonathan pointed to a specific promise. He reminded David of his anointing. He reminded him that God had not forgotten about him and that the chaos around him didn't cancel what God had said.

Jonathan could speak with such confidence, not because he had control over what would happen, but because he trusted God's word. Hope and friendship isn't just about making people feel better. It's about believing alongside them that God is good. When you speak this kind of hope into someone's life, not only are you participating with them, but you're strengthening your own endurance as well. And finally, the last way that, or the fourth way, that godly friendships reflect God's commitment to us is through commitment. Before Jonathan left David to return home, 1st, Samuel 2318 tells us that the two of them made a covenant before the Lord. This was a renewal of a promise they'd already made to one another in earlier chapters, a promise to remain loyal, to protect one another, and to honor the Lord in their friendship.

This moment was important. Here they are standing in the wilderness, and they're surrounded by uncertainty about the future. David could be captured. Jonathan could be punished by his father for his allegiance to David. But still, they paused to recommit. This is a powerful reflection of how God calls us to approach our friendships. Not looking for what we can get, but as image bearers reflecting his faithfulness to others. God is a covenant keeping God. His promises aren't based on what we can do for him. He binds himself to his people, not because we're worthy, but because he is steadfast. In our friendships, we're not going to perfectly reflect God's covenant love, but we can strive to reflect it in loving others the way God does, showing up, honoring our word, pursuing forgiveness when needed, asking God to

help us love others because he loves us. Relationships are designed by God to be good gifts that reflect his goodness. So how can we be good friends? Four final tips. One, don't be needy, but do give more than you take. Needing help is different from being needy. A needy friend looks for a valid. validation and friendship. And true friendship points us back to the security we already have in Christ. Shift your mindset from I always text first to I'll reach out because I care. Number two, don't obsess. Do assume the best. When a friend doesn't respond, it's easy to spiral. Did I do something wrong? Are they mad? Most of the time, they're just busy. Assume the best. Friendship isn't perfect, but it's a place where grace and forgiveness and growth go hands.

in hand. Third, don't overdo it. Do, said healthy expectations. Friendship, like chips and guac, is best in moderation, right? Pace your time and presence. Enjoy one another without crowding out time for work, rest and family, respect each other's limits, make space for sustainable connection. Be there when you are needed. Fourth, don't place your identity in your friends. Do ask God for strength to be a good friend. Friendship is a reflection of God's love, not a replacement for it. If we're looking to friends to make us feel whole, we're going to be disappointed. But if we root ourselves in Christ, our friendships become life-giving, not life-defining. Jesus is the friend who never fails. After Peter denied him three times, Jesus still sought him out after the resurrection,

not to condemn him, but to restore him and love him. When we root our words, we root our words, in Jesus' unfailing love, we're free to be better friends, less demanding, more gracious, more generous. We won't need our friends to validate us because we already know we are deeply known and loved. And from that place, we can speak and act in ways that help our friends believe that for themselves. Our longing for true lasting friendship will never be satisfied in full by human connection, but it will point us toward the one friendship that never fades, Jesus Christ, who is perfectly committed to us, who empowers us to love others well.