Ten Minute Bible Talks Devotional Bible Study - Addicted to the Approval of Others? | New Testament | Acts 12

Episode Date: May 8, 2023

Are you overly sensitive? Is it hard for you to take criticism? Are you always trying to impress others? Do you get caught in comparison? If so, you might be an addict. In today's episode, Keith discusses Acts 12 and offers hope for people-pleasers. Your support makes TMBT possible. Ten Minute Bible Talks is a crowd-funded project. Join the TMBTeam to reach more people with the Bible. Give now. Join the TMBT community in reading the entire New Testament in one year. Get your FREE reading plan here. Like this content? Make sure to leave us a rating and share it with others, so others can find it too. Use #asktmbt to connect with us, ask questions, and suggest topics. We'd love to hear from you! To learn more, visit our website and follow us on Instagram, Facebook, and Twitter@TenMinuteBibleTalks. Don't forget to subscribe to the TMBT Newsletter here. Passages: Acts 12

Welcome to 10-minute Bible Talks, where we connect the Bible to your life. In the time it takes to get to work. I'm Keith Simon. My name's Keith, and I'm an addict. I'm addicted to the approval of other people. I care too much about what other people think of me. I don't want that to be true. I'm embarrassed that it's true.

It sounds silly to say that I care so much about what other people think, and the reason it sounds silly is because it is silly. Why should I care about what other people think of me? I shouldn't. I should only care about what God thinks. But unfortunately, that's not where I am. Addictions of all kind. Rob you of joy, peace,

robs you of your relationships, your sanity. It can even take your life. How do you escape addictions? Well, if you're addicted to substances or food or shopping, you might need to get help by seeing a counselor or going to rehab. What do you do if you're addicted to approval? As far as I know, there's no rehab for that kind of addiction.

Today we're in Acts chapter 12. Herod was the ruler of Judea and he had James and Peter, two of Jesus's disciples and then later apostles, arrested. He arrested them because he wanted to stop them from spreading the gospel message about Jesus. Herod killed James or had him killed by his soldiers. but Peter miraculously escaped with the aid of an angel.

After all that happened, Herod goes off to the important city of Cessaria. Cessaria was named after the Caesar. And there are a couple smaller cities, Tire and Cydon, who came to ask Herod for more food because he controlled their food supply. Those cities needed to be on good terms with Herod because he had economic power over them. The fact that they depended on him fed Herod's ego. Chapter 12, verse 21. On the appointed day, Herod, wearing his royal robes, sat on his throne and delivered a public address to the people.

They shouted, this is the voice of a God, not of a man. Immediately, because Herod did not give praise to God, an angel of the Lord struck him down, and he was eaten by worms and died. But the word of God continued to eat. increase and spread. One thing that God wants to teach us from Acts chapter 12 is that loving the praise of people can steal our life. Herod loves the praise of people. We'd seen that earlier in the chapter where it says this, he had James, the brother of John, put to death with the sword. When he saw

that this pleased the Jews, he proceeded to seize Peter also. So do you hear that? Herod had Peter arrested, not because Peter had done something wrong, not because he had broken the law, but because it made people happy and he craved their approval. Craving other people's approval can lead us to do horrible things. So there, Herod sits in this big, important city. He gets to be seen sitting on the throne, all decked out in the royal robes. I'm not sure if Herod was a gifted speaker or not, but it sure seems like the people of Tyre and Stry and Sidon knew how to massage his ego. They know what kind of man Herod is. They knew how to get on his good side. That's why they shouted, this is the voice of a God, not of a man. And I'm sure that for a

fleeting moment, Herod must have loved their praise. But immediately, because Herod did not give praise to God, an angel of the Lord struck him down and he was eaten by worms and died. See, God made it clear that he wasn't as impressed with Herod as Herod was impressed with himself. God made it clear what he thought of Herod's self-promotion. Living for the praise of people instead of the praise of God is very dangerous. If you live for the praise of people, you will end up like Herod, not necessarily physically, but certainly spiritually and eternally. Now that's sobering news for people like you and me, because many of us are not much different

in Herod in that we too are addicted to the praise of people, we too are addicted to other people's approval. What does that look like in my life? Well, when my identity is wrapped up and whether I am perceived as successful or attractive or likable or whatever it is, then I'm set up for this approval addiction. It means that my sense of self-identity is on the line. So when I'm in the grips of approval addiction, I am what other people think of me. If being busy, is seen as important that I must portray myself as being very, very busy. If having money is a sign of real freedom, real importance, then I must try to get as much money as possible and even live above my means so that it looks like I have more money that I

actually have so that other people will like and respect me. If knowing the right people proves my importance, then I'm going to try to network to try to know all the important people. It's not that I really want to know them for their sake. It's not that I want to know them as human beings created in the image of God. It's that I want to make contact with them. I want to be their friend so that they will make me look important so that they'll make me gain the approval of those who I look up to. See, what matters most to people who are gripped with approval addiction is how I am perceived by the world around me. but this is a terrible addiction and unfortunately millions of people are under its sway when i am an

approval addict i am always vulnerable to other people's opinion about me so my life is like an emotional roller coaster when my kids are well behaved then i feel good about myself when my house is clean or when i am wearing the right style or people are laughing at my jokes then i feel important But what about when my kids are throwing a fit or my house is a disaster or I am behind the style or my jokes fall flat? Well, then I don't like myself. I don't feel respected by other people and I can't deal with that. Let me give you a few symptoms of approval addiction and see if you recognize it in your life. Are you sometimes overly sensitive and often find yourself getting hurt by things that other people say about you?

Do people ever say that you get defensive and can't take constructive criticism? If so, you might be addicted to approval. If you find yourself comparing yourself with other people, if you find yourself getting competitive and like you have to beat other people, you have to be the best, you have to be at the top of the list, then you're probably addicted to approval. If you live with a nagging sense that you're not important enough, not special enough, good enough. If you find yourself sometimes getting envious of what other people have, you might be addicted to approval. If you ever find yourself trying to impress people and subtly boasting,

so that it doesn't really sound like you're boasting, but you're hoping people walk away impressed with you? Or if you ever find yourself asking, what do other people think about me? You might be addicted to approval. See, it goes by many names. When you're younger, it's called peer pressure. As you get older, you might call yourself a people pleaser. Sometimes people call it codependency. God calls it sin. At the heart of that sin, we are replacing God's approval with other people's approval. We are valuing other people's opinion more than God's. Are you overcommitted? Do you find it hard to say no, even when wisdom dictates that you should. Do you second guess your decisions

because you're not sure what other people are going to think of them? Do you get easily embarrassed? If so, it might be because you are addicted to approval. You are beholden to the opinion of other people. Here's a silly example, but I think makes the point. Imagine that you are singing in the car.

You don't care. I mean, you're doing it. You're having fun. But didn't you notice somebody else is watching you sing in the car? Now you're embarrassed. You see, you're embarrassed because of what other people think about you, not because of what you're actually doing. Living for the approval of others is such a part of the human fabric that if we deny

we struggle with it, we should check our pulse to see if we are still alive. The approval of others is so controlling, it is so alluring because it promises something we desperately want. We believe that people's affirmation and acceptance and accolades will make us acceptable, will make us important, will make us feel good about ourselves. Sure, we're fairly sure that God loves us. We're pretty sure God accepts us, but still we have this craving to be accepted by others. Their approval is more real than God's approval. And so as a result, we live in bondage, controlled by others, feeling very empty inside. Every one of us is controlled by whatever we believe will give us what we think we need.

A guy named Ed Welch wrote a book on this topic. It's called When People Are Big and God Is Small. Isn't that a great title? It just kind of clarifies the core issue. When we live for human approval and not God's approval, what we're doing is that we're making people big in our life and we're reducing God to something far smaller than he truly is. We're exalting the opinion of others to a place that only God deserves. Contrast King Jesus to King Herod. The true king, King Jesus, he was the humble king. He died to

free us from the bondage of approval addiction. He made you acceptable to God. He is the one who did not consider equality with God something to be grasped, but made himself nothing. taking the very nature of a servant being found in human likeness. He is the one who humbled himself and became obedient to death, even death on a cross. And that's because he lived for the audience of one. He lived for the approval of one. And that was His Heavenly Father. That was God Himself.

I pray for myself and for you that we would learn to live for the audience of one. that we would exalt God's opinion above everyone else's opinion, that we would live like God is big and people are small. Amen. Hey, thanks for listening. If you want to go deeper, sign up for the 10-minute Bible Talk newsletter. You'll get a short email once a week.

It'll challenge you to grow in your faith, give you interesting background on today's passage, and a lot, lot more. Just click the link in the show notes to sign up. It'll help you deepen your journey with Jesus.