Ten Minute Bible Talks Devotional Bible Study - Jonathan's 3 Tips For Friendship | Historical Books | 1 Samuel 20:1-23

Episode Date: May 5, 2025

Are you a good friend? Are you a good listener? Are you loyal when it's costly? In today's episode, Keith shares how 1 Samuel 20:1-23 encourages us to build friendships that reflect the love of Christ. If you're listening on Spotify, tell us about yourself and where you're listening from! Read the Bible with us in 2025! This year, we’re exploring the Historical Books—Joshua, Judges, 1 & 2 Samuel, and 1 & 2 Kings. Download your reading plan now. Your support makes TMBT possible. Ten Minute Bible Talks is a crowd-funded project. Join the TMBTeam to reach more people with the Bible. Give now. Like this content? Make sure to leave us a rating and share it so that others can find it, too. Use #asktmbt to connect with us, ask questions, and suggest topics. We'd love to hear from you! To learn more, visit our website and follow us on Instagram, Facebook, and Twitter @TenMinuteBibleTalks. Don't forget to subscribe to the TMBT Newsletter here. Passages: 1 Samuel 20:1-23

Welcome to 10-minute Bible Talks, where we connect the Bible to your life. In the time it takes to get to work. I'm Keith Simon. Anne Hella was an experienced mountain biker. She'd done the same ride hundreds of times with her friend and riding partner, Debbie. On this particular day, the weather was perfect. The trail at Widing Ranch Wilderness Park was familiar. Nothing really seemed out of the ordinary.

We'd started riding about 4 o'clock, Debbie later recalled. It usually takes about 30 minutes before the ride gets fun and technical. As they descended a section of the trail called Cactus, they passed an abandoned bike and a man nearby who looked like he was making a phone call. Then it happened. Anne was in front of me, Debbie said, I heard her screaming. It was like a siren. I knew something was seriously wrong. By the time Debbie got there, Anne had been pulled off her bike.

A full-grown mountain lion had latched under her neck and was dragging her off the trail. Debbie didn't run. She didn't freeze. Instead, she threw her bike at the line. It didn't move. So she lunged, grab Anne's lap. leg and dropped to the ground. He kept pulling, she said, but I wasn't going to let go. The mountain lion dragged them both about 30 feet into a ravine. Debbie held on and screamed at the

mountain lion. Eventually, other bikers heard and began throwing rocks. One rock hit the lion just right and it let Anne go. Anne was rushed to a trauma unit with life-threatening injuries. Her face had been torn, her neck was puncture, but she lived. Why did Anne Hella live such a violent attack? because she had something we often overlook, something that we don't pay enough attention to, something that deep down we all want, but we don't make a priority, and had a good friend. Do you have a good friend? Maybe even more importantly, are you a good friend? Well, today we're going to hear what 1st Samuel 20 teaches us about friendship. But before we dive in, let's just take a moment and pray.

God, your word reveals more than just information. It reveals who reveals who, who you are and who you want us to become. As we open the scriptures, help us not to stay the same. Teach us what it means to be faithful friends and form us into people who love others well. In Jesus' name we pray. Amen. Now, before this chapter, 1 Samuel 20, things had already began to unravel. David had become a threat to King Saul. And that's because David was winning victories and gaining popularity, people were singing that Saul had killed his thousands, but David had killed tens of thousands. Now, those numbers weren't precise. The point was that Saul was a great warrior, but David was a greater warrior, and that made Saul paranoid, jealous, and dangerous. In chapter 19,

Saul tried to kill David. In fact, he tried to kill him several times. First, he tried to pin him to a wall with a spear. Then he sent men to David's house to kill him, but David's wife, who is also Saul's daughter helped David escape through a window. So by the time we get to chapter 20, David is a fugitive. He's on the run. He's hiding from Saul. He's not sure who he can trust. But there is one person left, his friend Jonathan, Saul's son.

We pick up in verse one. Then David fled and came to Jonathan and asked, What have I done? What is my guilt? What is my sin before your father that he seeks my life? David is in distress. You can really hear it in his voice. He wants answers, so he turns to the one person he hopes won't betray him.

Now, Jonathan doesn't believe David at first. In verse two, he says, you shall not die. Behold, my father does nothing either great or small without disclosing it to me. Why should my father hide this from me? But David insists that he's right, that Saul really is trying to kill him. He's just hiding it from his son Jonathan because he knows that Jonathan and David are close friends. So in the rest of the chapter, the two of them come up with a plan. David will hide in the field during the new moon feast.

Jonathan will go to the feast and gauge Saul's mood. If Saul reacts violently to David's absence, they'll know the danger is real. And that's exactly what happens. At the feast, Jonathan tells his dad why David isn't there. He says in verse 28, David earnestly asked me for permission to go to Bethlehem. He said, let me go because our family is observing a sacrifice in the town

and my brother has ordered me to be there. If I have found favor in your eyes, let me get away to see my brothers. That is why he has not come to the king's table. Verse 30, Saul's anger flared up at Jonathan, and he said to him, You son of a perverse and rebellious woman, don't I know that you have sided with the son of Jesse to your own shame and to the shame of the mother who bore you? As long as the son of Jesse lives on this earth, neither you nor your kingdom will be established. Now send someone to bring him to me, for he must die.

Well, clearly David was right. Saul is intent on killing him. And so Jonathan leaves the feast and he goes to execute the plan that he and David had contrived of how he was going to warn him of Saul's anger. Jonathan shoots arrows in the field that David was hiding in. And he yells to his servant that the arrows are beyond where he's standing. That's the signal that they had worked out, that David must flee. So here is David. He's on the verge of death. He was isolated, betrayed, and alone, but he escaped, he survived. Why? Because just like Ann, David had a good friend. And so this brings the question back to us, do you have that kind of friend? And are you becoming that kind of friend? See, everyone wants a loyal friend, but not many people are willing to be a loyal

friend. We say we want close relationships, but we avoid vulnerability. We say we want deep connection, but we hide behind sarcasm or busyness or distraction. We want people to pursue up. us, but do we pursue them? You see this in churches and small groups and family. Everyone is waiting for someone else to go first, but friendship isn't just something you find. It's not like you discover it. It's something you build. It's something you develop. And I think in 1st Samuel 20, Jonathan shows us how. Let's look at three things that made Jonathan a good friend and learn from him how we can become a good friend. The first thing we learn is that a good friend listens. See, David didn't show up with a plan. Instead, he was asking Jonathan questions. What have I done? What's my guilt? David was

confused, angry, afraid. Jonathan didn't shut him down. He didn't minimize the fear or talk him out of it. Instead, he just listened. That's where a real friendship begins, not with trying to fix someone's problems, but just being present in their life. You don't always have to know the right words. You don't have to offer advice. In fact, it's probably best not to offer advice unless your friend asks for it. but what you do have to do is pay attention. In a world full of noise and distraction, listening is one of the rarest and most powerful forms of love. Are you the kind of person that other people feel safe talking to?

Are you more interested in being helpful, like trying to fix their problem, or actually hearing what they're saying and listening to them? Let's stop for just a moment and bring this before God. Lord, you listen to me. You are patient with me. forgive me for the ways that I've been a poor friend, a poor listener to those around me. Holy Spirit created me a humble heart. Help me to be slow to speak, quick to listen,

full of compassion. Amen. The second thing we learn from Jonathan is that being a good friend is costly. Jonathan wasn't just helping a buddy. He was laying down his future. See, Jonathan was the crown prince. If David lived, Jonathan's path to the throne would vanish. But Jonathan loved David more than he loved his own success, his own career, his own ambition. In verse 13, he says, If my father intends to harm you, may the Lord deal with me, be it ever so severely, if I do not let you know and send you away in peace. That's loyalty.

That's not just talk. That's action. See, we say we care about our friends, but when it costs us, Maybe it costs us our time or our convenience or a reputation. Do we still show up? Real friendship always costs something. The question is whether it's worth it to you. Lord Jesus, you paid the cost to be in a relationship with me.

Forgive me for being more loyal to my own success than to my friends. Holy Spirit, teach me to value people more than status. Help me lay down my own comfort for the sake of other people. Amen. The last thing Jonathan teaches us is that a good friend sticks around. And Jonathan could have kept his distance. He could have stayed neutral in all this, but he didn't. In verse 23, he tells David,

The Lord is witness between you and me forever. That's the language of covenant. Just like God had made a covenant with Israel to protect them, bless them, love them, keep them. Now Jonathan is making a covenant with David. See, Jonathan didn't just show up one time. he stayed involved in David's life. Friendship isn't a one-time act of kindness. It's a long-term pattern of loyalty, and that's hard, because people disappoint you. People change. They hurt you. Sticking with someone when it's messy, well, that's what real friendship looks like. Father, you've always been loyal to me,

despite my sin. Forgive me for failing to show that kind of loyalty to the people who are closest to me. Holy Spirit make me the kind of friend who shows up in people's life. Amen. Friendship is hard and all of us fail at it, but we're not left to try harder on our own. We have a friend. Jesus told his disciples, I no longer call you servants, I have called you friends. He didn't just talk about love. He embodied it. He didn't just lay down comfort. He laid down his life. While we were still sinners, while we were still bad friends, Christ died for us. And so now we love because he first loved us. You want a friend like Jonathan? Well, it starts by receiving the friendship of Jesus. He's the one who listens. He's the one who lays down his own comfort.

He's the one who sacrifices for you. He's the one who stays involved in your life. He's the forgiving friend, the patient friend, the loving friend, the kind friend, the listening friend. Jesus, thank you for calling us friends. Thank you for showing up. in the mess of our life for burying our burdens for laying down your own life. I pray, Father, that we would love like you love us. Teach us to be the kind of friends who reflect your loyalty, your compassion, and your grace. Amen.