Ten Percent Happier with Dan Harris - 80: Bellamy Young, TV's "Scandal" Star

Episode Date: May 26, 2017

ALERT: This episode contains "Scandal" spoilers! Bellamy Young, best known for playing Mellie Grant on ABC's hit show, "Scandal," said making meditation part of her daily routine has helped improve her sleep and process her character's heavy, emotional narratives. And she dishes on what was changed in the original "Scandal" season 6 plotline. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

It kind of blows my mind to consider the fact that we're up to nearly 600 episodes of this podcast, the 10% happier podcast. That's a lot of conversations. I like to think of it as a great compendium of, and I know this is a bit of a grandiose term, but wisdom. The only downside of having this vast library of audio is that it can be hard to know where to start. So we're launching a new feature here, playlists, just like you put together a playlist of your favorite songs.

Back in the day, we used to call those mix tapes. Just like you do that with music, you can do it with podcasts. So if you're looking for episodes about anxiety, we've got a playlist of all of our anxiety episodes. Or if you're looking for how to sleep better, we've got a playlist of all of our anxiety episodes, or if you're looking for how to sleep better, we've got a playlist for that. We've even put together a playlist of some of my personal favorite episodes. That was a hard list to make. Check out our playlists at 10%.com slash playlist. That's 10% all one word spelled out..com slash playlist singular.

Let us know what you think. We're always open to tweaking how we do things and maybe there's a playlist we haven't thought of. Hit me up on Twitter or submit a comment through the website. Hey y'all, it's your girl, Kiki Palmer. I'm an actress, singer, and entrepreneur. I'm a new podcast, baby, this is Kiki Palmer. I'm asking friends, family, and experts,

the questions that are in my head. Like, it's only fans only bad. Where did memes come from. And where's Tom from MySpace? Listen to Baby, this is Kiki Palmer on Amazon Music or wherever you get your podcasts. A little bit of housekeeping as we start this new podcast. You may remember 70 Solace from episode 43, a really, really interesting teacher who's also had some harrowing health experiences. She has just posted some free guided meditations on the 10% happier app, including one, a five minute one called Working with Anxiety, and a one minute meditation called For An Anxious Moment. This is a woman who knows a little bit about anxiety, and these meditations are great, and again, they're free on the 10% happier app. All right now down to business.

This week we have Bellamy Young who is one of the stars of a show called Scandal which happens to air on a network called ABC which is where I also work. Let this one unfurl. I was really, I didn't know much about Bellamy and I learned over the course of this interview and she became, she started interesting and just got increasingly so as the thing progressed and there were a lot of little surprises along the way. So really just let this one unfurl and enjoy it. Here we go. Bellamy young. From ABC, this is the 10% happier podcast, I'm Dan Harris.

How when, where, why did you start better thing? I, it has been many years. I, my mom has buried four husbands, and it was after the third. It was a very lovely, lovely man named Barry, that I really went through a time of finding myself, finding my roots, finding my anchor in this life, so I didn't want to feel so upended and, you know, untethered. And at the time, a friend was studying TM and LA. And although I'm not a subscriber, just a particular branch of meditation, I really saw transformation in her life and was so very interested in the experience of it and started to read a little bit about science geek, started to read a little bit about, you know, how it changes your brain

and sort of finding my way for myself with it. So it's, for me, I can't. I'm a very lucid dreamer and I never want to take the day into my dreams. Like, I feel like that's a time to get higher knowledge to receive other information, messages, whatever guidance. And so I like to give the day away, right, you know, as I'm getting into bed. And it's a simpler process for me, maybe than some, but I start on my breath.

I breathe in on three words, yes, and out on yes, and in on love, and out on love, and in on thank you, and out on love and on thank you and out on thank you. And then I literally, you know, we all suffer with the thoughts that come and go and associating with the space between or a higher self or whatever. For me, it's more molecular. I focus on just getting a little space, a little space at first between my atoms and then a little more space between my atoms and a little more. And eventually I just dissolve into everything and I'm reminded that that's our actual natural state.

And I stay there, thoughtless and suspended and complete for as long as I can. So this is a pre-bed time ritual? Yeah, and then I find I can go to sleep clear. You know, I don't, I don't, this is a nattering mind because I gosh, do I have one. It doesn't go into whatever that state of consciousness that allows us to rest, rebuild, renew, receive. And so do you just make this up on your own?

Because if you did, it's great. Where do you get it? Because your friend was studying transcendental medicine. So yeah, yeah. You didn't want to go down that road. You just made up your own thing. I just, for me, and it's such a personal path, and there's no wrong or right, for me,

that journey seemed so personal, and it seemed like you would intuit what you needed. And that's just where I wound up. I started in a lot of different ways because you must. I started with the breath. I tried with a candle. I tried so many different things. And it really came back to a visceral experience of oneness for me. And it's been so helpful, so fulfilling, so grounding.

I really, if I, there's some reason, press days like this week or anything like that, that I think that I don't have time. There's never time I don't have time because if I don't have time I really lose the rest of my weekday life, whatever. It really is destabilizing. But it sounds like the way you've structured it is doing it right before you go to sleep. You don't have to find time for it during the day. You just have to make sure that you do it before you go to bed. That's smart. Yeah, well I don't know because I'm a night person though.

You know, like some people are mourning people and they do better to meditate in the morning, but I'm definitely a night person and it's right for me. Yeah, I've been studying recently, sort of some of the science around behavior change. And you wisely, intuitive a very important thing,

which is you gotta know yourself. If you're not a mourning person, don't do it in the morning. If you're not a morning person, don't do it in the morning. If you're not a night person, don't do it. And then I find experiment, find the time that works for you, be willing to fail and start again. That's how we make a biting habit. Yeah, and our answers, you know,

that what we seek is always within us. So we have the answers that we're asking the questions because the answers exist and want to get out of us, right? So just get calm and listen and you'll know what you need. You mentioned this is a press week and we should say that we are, I'm interviewing you on the morning after scandals big season. Yeah, season six finale, if I sound a little wrecked. We've had such a beautiful week. They announced this week also that next year is our final season. So it's been such a bittersweet week to share this. My cast is such a family. With cast crew, writers, all of us. I mean, there's so, so very much love. It's an unbelievably

heart-based endeavor. And this, you know, this is the last week we'll share in New York, together seeing plays, doing press, you know, being the scandal family. And so it was all, seeing plays, doing press, you know, being the scandal family. And so it was all, oh, just very, very rich yesterday. Yeah. I have a million scandal questions before, before, before, before, before I bring it, I just want to stay on it and say it for a second. So when did you institute this nightly ritual? Like how many years ago? What did it do for you? I, it was probably like 2003 or 2004. That's a while ago. Okay, yeah. So very, very, very fast back in 2003 or four, okay. Yeah.

So this has been, there's a good long run. Yeah, well, but it's, you know, you know, it's life changing and then it becomes like breathing. So you're like, why would I not breathe? That would be crazy. So yeah, it's, it's so, been so helpful. Yeah. And do you feel like you talked about your nattering mind?

What would you feel like you have some distance from some of the unhelpful things that the mind is offering up? What is the impact in your daily life? Well, definitely, my sleep improved. I was very, I had much unrest in my sleep because I would just take all the thoughts in there with me and wrestle them all night long. So that makes your life better immediately.

But also, as you do, you learn not to identify with the thoughts. So even when they come during the day and those old tapes or self-doubt or obsessing about things that are out of your control. You know fundamentally, you don't have the thought, but you know that you are not those thoughts. So you have the option to disengage. You have the objectivity to forgive yourself, right? You don't, you aren't, like, your mind is not driving this little horse in buggy.

Like really, that's just something, those thoughts are something that are happening to you that you can just love and release You know and you and if you don't to then you're then you're choosing right then you're choosing and I make that choice As often as other people do you know I get something on my mind and I'm like, you know you could let this go I'm like no, I have to see it through. So I feel like we're always learning, right? Life is a journey. But once you know that you're making choices and that life isn't running you, that this is such a gift, this time on the planet, and that you get to go through it in the way that seems right for your heart, your soul, your spirit. And even the, you

know, moments that you might deem failure are lessons and just to embrace it all and really be gentle with yourself. I found, I've interviewed a bunch of actors on this podcast and I've found that this practice is really useful. I don't want to say especially, but it's very useful for actors because you have so much insecurity baked into what you do. You don't know what your next job is going to be. You just found out that you're going to the last season of this massive hit show. What are you going to do after that? And your subject to the slings and arrows of television critics and random people on Twitter and people who you might feel

like you're competitive with in the acting spaces, all this stuff going on. So I'm just wondering if I'm diagnosing correctly the water in which you swim and whether meditation is helped with all of the aforementioned. Absolutely, as actors, we live a life of rejection. Rejection and unemployment are our constant companions, and then jobs are our blessings. So, you really have to find something deeper to root too, or it's a complete mayhem. If you start identifying with the lack, then you're lost. Because there's such abundance around us all the time.

And when you can remind yourself that we are one and that we're all connected and that no one has less or needs more, you know, it's, um, how do you feel like you're one though when somebody else is getting a job you want? Don't you feel pretty separate from that person in that moment? You know, I'm blessed because I was not born competitive.

So except for myself, I'm really like, I ride myself hard. So that's why it's really Fruitful for me to make friends with my mind or at least you know, it's it's working. I understand how it works I really for myself and like all the people that I know and I love you You get the hand you're supposed to get you know like our all of our lives and and maybe it's just a little more obvious metaphor when you're an actor. Like you get handed the job you're supposed to get. Like to your soul needs to go through this journey and there are no mistakes. So when you don't get a job it just wasn't your job and there'll be a different job or there won't be even. I've never

thought I've never thought that should have been mine because clearly it shouldn't have. And I've never thought that should have been mine. Because clearly it shouldn't have. And I've always wound up so sort of breathless with how perfect everything is for the jobs that I've had, be they tiny or just the gift of this for seven years to be with these people to play this unbelievable part. This is a part of a lifetime and I'm so lucky. But as always right on time and they, you know, like everything else, if your mind and heart and eyes are open, your spirit is open, then you get to have that lesson and move

on to the next thing. I think the, what I always thought about was one of the coolest things about being an actor is you get to live like a thousand lifetimes in one lifetime. Yeah, that's pretty cool. It's unbelievable. And your body when you're acting, has no idea you're acting,

you're going through something, you're going through it. And it just doesn't know the difference. I do worry for folks that I have to do a lot of horror movies or very, very, very dark material. I would not do all of that. And I don't know how they keep their spirit clear and clean and keep themselves safe because that, I know when I lost my son on the show or even going through the divorce

with Tony, whatever, my body doesn't know I'm lying. So you really have to have a way to process and have a way to learn and move forward. I don't think I could do it because I would never be able to convince myself. Oh, really? No, I'm a terrible. The times when I've had to act in any way,

I'd play myself on conviction that you're still live, ABC. Yeah, yeah, totally. Just as doing an interview with lead actress. And it was terrible. I was terrible. I cannot act. What were you terrible? Like, what do you think? I just, I thought I got, I got all of my head self-conscious. I don't like, you know, pretending. I don't mind just being myself. Cause that's all I really know. But I don't if you asked me to

like even be a slightly different version of me who were sight lines, I understand that I know that I mean it. I can't do it. I love trying to find another person's soul center, whatever. It'll be handed a bunch of lines and trying to really find the human behind them is my favorite crossword puzzle ever. I love it so much. Sure, whatever.

Potato potato, Dan. Do you, do you live a super honest life? Do you ever lie? Are you a good liar? I'm not a good liar, no. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm a terrible person in many, many ways, but I'm actually not really into lying.

Yeah. So I don't want to hold myself, I don't want to hold myself with some like, avataratar morality, but even my wife, who you know, both of us are very sort of open about my flaws, not so much hers. That's not true, we're open about both of our flaws, but one of the things that even she will concede

is that she can trust that if she asks me a question, I'll tell the truth, even if she doesn't want to hear it. That's cool. Yeah, so I guess that also feeds into me being a terrible actor. Yeah, yeah. Can you lie? You probably lie really well.

I mean, I lie for a living, right? I just don't make a practice of it in my life because there was time when I did. There was a time in my 20s where just my self-esteem was so low that it wasn't even like lying to get ahead because like I said, I want everybody very kumbaya. I just would lie because I thought my life was so shameful.

So I'd lie and make up a better life. And lying is exhausting. You have to remember everything. And while I've got killer short-term memory, boy that long-term memory, it does not support a life of duplicities. So I mean, really, it's not cool. I can't hang with it anymore.

What was wrong with your life? You were an aspiring actor and didn't just walk in the pool. I just, you know, I mean, what's wrong with any of our lives? Nothing. They're perfect. But I just didn't, I just had no self-esteem. And so I just thought, you know, the life I was living was shameful.

And so I just thought I would tell people better stories than that. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know it. It hurts my heart to even think about like I just want to hug my, like hug my old, my young self and anybody that's out there, I want to hug them too, because we're all just, wherever we are, we're perfect. And the more honest you are with people, the more connection you can make and lying only like keeps the separation, you know, it keeps such a gulf between

New Echasm, between you and connection and humans and remembering that, you know, remembering the oneness. But yeah, no, I live there forever. Yeah, but what a victory that you can look back and say, that's not me anymore. Thank heavens. I got to ask about your mother for. God bless her. Yes. My sweet mom, if you're listening, I love Evans. I got to ask about your mother. Four. God bless her. Yes. My sweet mom, if you're listening, I love you. Is she on to number five or?

She has a lovely boyfriend named Bill. Okay. Well, you know what? You can't bring her down. No, it's the best. I mean, it's a talent I don't have. So I was a bad dad. This is four.

The worst is it's four. No, they passed. Yeah, Dan. No, they passed. My first dad died when I was 15. And she married the guy who had been her boyfriend in seventh and eighth grade. His wife had died the year before and both of cancer. So your your dead died of cancer? He did. I'm very sorry. 15, that's a really hard age. It was, yeah, it was a confusing time. I mean, you don't know at the time, but it was.

Just to set the scene, this was in North Carolina. Asheville, North Carolina, and that's exactly right when I was in high school. And then Bob, I mean, Bob was her second husband and he passed away. And then she was alone for a little while and went on match.com, and then like 10 years later, and met like the best guy in the world named Barry. He was from Brockton. Brockton, that's true. Yeah.

How was he? Did he retire to Asheville? He had got his wife a cut and sick and he'd move south to Columbia. Columbia. Is that right? So girl, and he'd brought her there for her convulsants and she had passed. And they met. My mom is also not, you know, in B.

My mother's not geographically confined. So, you know, she's living in Asheville, but bears in South Carolina and she's all good with it. Same thing now, bills in Tennessee sometimes. It's all, you know. Wait, so there's, there's, do you think she's gonna get married for, for, for a fifth time?

I don't know, I don't know. Her journey will see what happens. And then there was Bobbi Lee, and he passed away of liver cancer last year, two years ago. Wow. I know. The resilience, the romantic resilience of your mom.

Yeah, I know. Never been, but still. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, definitely, definitely. Do you have clear memories of your dad? Um, spotty. Yeah, yeah. It was a disorienting time. That was aty. Yeah, yeah. It was a disorienting time.

That was a very disorienting time. It was very, very sick and we kept him at home and, um, bless him. He'd been alcoholic before that. So it wasn't, uh, so, um, a white picket meant before that. Right. So, yeah, some of my memories are, but, you know, I can remember him teaching me, like, accuracy throw for field day. And, you know, he'd always, we had this old Lincoln

Continental and like the suicide doors. And he'd drive me around, I was a little pageant child. And he'd drive me around in like little parades in that. And just different things. He wore a two-pay. And I'd love to put on his like to pay and use a cane and pretend to be like the entertainers of the, you know. Did you wore to pay, it was open about it,

like you could get it off a minute. Oh yeah, I hate it, care. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So you were a pageant child. So you've been, were you? I was, whatever the opposite of a pageant, problem child. Yeah.

No, really were you a problem child? A horrible kid. Tell us the worst thing I've ever done thing my mother will tell you lots of bad Okay, just randomly got my first time I got arrested Wow, as when I was 14 my friends and I were Dandalizing us a T station in suburban Boston to train like oh MBTA and suburban Boston, a train, like an MBTA, a Metro Boston transportation authority. Anyway, we were like throwing rocks at stuff.

And I actually think the cops just brought me home that night, but I was the first time I was in a cop car. Yeah, they didn't arrest us, but that was number one. Who, why, why, why, with the stones? And we weren't up to spray paint, yeah. Oh, I did that too. I had a robust graffiti career. Yeah, my tag was ace.

Yeah, amazing. I'm gonna make you draw that for me later. Actually, my tag, I still do it when I'm doodling and it's a better edit now than I was when I was a kid. Of course you are. And all of my friends say the same thing. I love it. Because when I was in, I'm 45,

so when I was in junior high Wrap really broke. Yeah, and like I was obsessed with run damn see and First concert ever went to was the Beastie boys and or this is a second concert whoa that's wow Okay, so we were really into it. So you know, everybody was beat boxing and I couldn't break dance could you be box boxed, because we have a microphone? Not really. I'll do it in my son a little bit. Okay.

And then, but I was into the graffiti. I was into it. So I spray paint at the train station too, but on this particular night, we were mostly destroying rather than creating. Wow. Hey, I'm Aresha, and I'm Brooke. And we're the hosts of Wunderys Podcast, even the rich.

Where we bring you absolutely true and absolutely shocking stories about the most famous families and biggest celebrities the world has ever seen. Our newest series is all about drag icon RuPaul Charles. After a childhood of being ignored by his absentee father, Ru goes out searching for love and acceptance. But the road to success is a rocky one. Substance abuse and mental health struggles

threatened to veer Rue off course. In our series, Rue Paul born naked. We'll show you how Rue Paul overcame his demons and carved out a place for himself as one of the world's top entertainers, opening the doors for aspiring queens everywhere. Follow even the rich wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen ad-free on Amazon Music or the Wondery app. So I was bad boy. Wow. Anyway, but you were a

page chat. I was a page chat. Well, I was singer. Like, I'm adopted. And we didn't, of course, have, you know, any information about my birth parents, but we had a, like a page and had a paragraph on my mom and like two lines on my dad and birth parents in. And part of the paragraph said that she loved a so and was a singer and all this sort of stuff. So my mom tried to give me opportunities that she thought were genetically within my, yeah, I've come to meet them since the love and so much.

I have and that's wonderful. And but all that information is wrong. And when they met me, they were like, so your parents are doctors. And I was like, no. And I was like, so you sing. And she's like, no. So we were like, whoa.

Because I spent six weeks in foster care. So I think we all just, I think the paper's got shuffled. So I sit here. As an infant, you spent six? Yeah. And so I sit here like a product of erroneous information living a life that I love so deeply. I can't even imagine like you can imagine What I'd be doing if it weren't this I I'm so I'm so grateful for my life, but yeah, it was all a Product of a bad tip

Biological parent your biological parents you've actually reconnected with I have I don't really talk about them too much because I Keep them private out of respect because they're not you know not everybody knows their story and not they didn't you know They didn't tell everybody and they didn't ask for this but um, but I will say they're the best people in the world Oh, wow. Yeah, and meeting them was so um like other best people in the world. Oh wow. Yeah. And meeting them was so like cellular, cellularly transformative. It was just very grounding and orienting and life and space and heart and they're terrific.

You don't get this kind of like the rich pageant of your life does not come through on your Wikipedia page. Oh. I'll have to see to that, Dan. You need to write a memoir. I mean, this is a very powerful, biographical details. Well, I give them freely. I guess so, my mom tried to find something somewhere, you know, anywhere that I could

sing. You know, as we did church choir and we did, you know, little things at school and I did summer stock up at Parkway Playhouse in North Carolina. And it's the South, so pageant, you know, so we did church choir and we did, you know, little things at school and I did summer stock up at Parkway Playhouse in North Carolina and it's the south, so pageant, you know, and I did them for a minute and then as I said, I am the least competitive human alive. So I was not down with the like competition of it and, um, but my mom, you know, we had friends, we were in sconce. And so I would go and I would, um, em see. Yeah, so I'd be like scarlet is wearing an eyelet dress with a fuchsia cumber bun and she

would be singing climb every mountain. And so you went off on the acting route? I did. I went to Yale. I went from North Carolina. My dad had died and I knew I'd need, you know, a really solid reason to leave the state and leave my mom like that. Yeah. The Yale has a legendary acting program, right?

They do graduate level. When I was there, the undergraduate was a bit underdeveloped. I see. I went for physics, though. I went to Yale because I knew I could sing. Oh, hence all the references to atoms. Yeah, well, yeah. I mean, I'm a failed physician, you know, physics major.

I, after, I was pretty good in North Carolina, but not on the world stage. And so I wound up with a double major in English and theater, but, you know, physics was my dream, dream, dream. But I knew I could sing. I was in a, a acapella singing group. So I knew I could get a great education and I could sing and my mom would understand

that I wanted to, you know, as Yale, I wanted to go to Yale. And I got the chance to see, Dan, I got to do the coolest thing this year. I, um, when I graduated college, because I was a huge scholarship kid, because my dad was dead and my mom was a high school teacher. And, uh, I just assumed that there was like a big C of money somewhere and I was getting two quarters of it. And I graduated and they said, so here's the name of the person who's been paying for your education. Maybe you want to write him a thank you note. Oh, wow.

And his name was Dr. Richard Light. And the first thing I did at a school was a national tour of Meet Me Saint Louis. And we went through, it was not a fancy tour. We went through Kalamazoo, where he lived. And I got to meet him and thank him. And he was one of those Renaissance men that had been a surgeon and a pilot and a cartographer and like just everything. And he was incredible. He was 93 when I met him with his little 60-year-old wife. And they were just the most inspiring people.

93 with a 60 year old wife. So a player. A player. Yeah. I mean, I thought, how must that feel to put people through college, like to give people college and I got to end-out scholarship this year? Oh, wow. Good for you.

Paying it forward. Paying it forward. That's great. That's the thing I'm proud of in my life. Yeah. That's amazing. That's congratulations. Thanks.

So, scandal. Scandal. What do you want to know? What do you want to know? Well, you're going to kill me. Why? Because I work for ABC and I've never watched the show. Life is short. you're allowed.

My wife is a big fan. You work a lot. All right, so your wife is smarter than you are. That's okay, we can get that out. It's not a problem. So I hit up my Twitter folks this morning and I asked for questions. I retweeted you to the United Kingdom stuff.

Yes, a lot of people got back to me. We have the best fans in the world, Dan. That's what you have to understand as our gladiators are. Grider die. Yeah, and they're incredible and just big-hearted and they are just in this ride with us. And the only reason we have these jobs, they, they're who got us the second season. We were a bubble show, but Carrie figured out we

should love to do this. Bubble show, meaning on the bubble, look, you might not make it. Yeah, but Carrie had figured out this, the social media was the next, like, how the world was gonna work. Here at Washington. Yeah. And so we were the first show to live tweet. And instead of, you know, TV had sort of become a thing you DVR and do it to AM. And we brought back like a pointment television. And our gladiators were so ferocious and wonderful

and lionhearted that that's what got us a second season. And then it just built from there. I really hope Ben sure would not listen to this podcast. I love you Ben, but I'm sorry I didn't watch the show. I'll spank him. It's okay, first question, from Melissa Mermaid. At Melissa Mermaid. Well definitely ask, Bell and me Young,

who she uses for inspiration is Melly with a little smiley face and a wink. I'm a little smiley like you're winky. Gosh, you know, the honest truth is it comes to me on the page. I literally just have to honor the script. They, uh, there was, I did a lot of research, you know, our, our history has a white male perspective, a patriarchal perspective. And so you learn a lot about presidents in school, but you don't learn about the women

behind them or beside them or sometimes ahead of them. And so I did a lot of research when I got the job, and I know I look, if you could see me in the studio, it's like I'm thinking about you, Melissa, as I'm answering now. We'll look back at you, Dan. I did a lot of research when I got the job about learning about my first ladies and, you know, Mellie's place in that lineage, and our writers pulled a lot of research when I got the job about learning about my first ladies. And, you know, Mellie's place in that lineage. And our writers pulled a lot of stories, like Julia Grant or Dali Madison,

like there were a lot of like homage storylines. But Mellie is her own beast. And I really just have to honor what's brought to me. And sometimes it's brought to me at rehearsals. So sometimes my reaction is very immediate and honest, but it really she She's built herself, Mellie. Yeah, very cool. All right, Carrie Freeman at Comics daughter has a meditation practice influenced your acting in any way do the benefits interfere or help with performing a highly dramatic scene?

Oh, Carrie, they're so it're so helpful because once you know how to quiet your mind much less your body, you like relaxation is essential for acting. If you are at all seized up either in your mind or in your body, you just can't, it doesn't flow through you. So your only job, of course your job is to prepare. You know, you know, your lines and I've thought about story arc and have ideas about character, but your job is to go in there, relax, open your mind, live in the other person's eyes and just react to what's happening in the moment. And that's what a meditation practice can bring you. You know, that sort of utter calm and utter presence. You're not in the future and you're not in the past. You're just living this moment and in acting,

you're living it with someone, with meditation, you're living it with all eternity. You know, you're just in the oneness, but it's been transformative, at least for me in my acting. What is the physics argument for oneness? Is there one or is that just an intuition you have? Oh, yeah, that's always just been my experience of things. I mean, you know, in any equals, empty squared way, I don't know where, you know, why you would end and I would begin. It's sort of just arbitrary. And I very, very, very much believe the energy is shared.

The table, this microphone, you and I, the thoughts that anyone listening, time being a construct, you know, all of it is simply oneness, not discretion, not discrete little packets. So, I think that's what I'm always aiming for is to have that sacred communion. That's always what I loved about physics it felt like looking at the face of God, asking the big questions. Physics is quite literally mind blowing.

This one maybe not a long answer. If she were asked to be hired to sing at a fan's wedding, would she do it? What do you wanna hear? It's a, you want guns and roses, is that it? Because I'm your girl. How does it feel to finally be president? It feels really good. I don't ever get invested in storylines because...

That was by the way from Eileen. Eileen, lovely, beautiful. Yes. You don't get invested in storylines because that was by the way from Eileen Eileen lovely beautiful You don't get invested in storylines. Yeah, because that's not my job and I don't write so I you know It's not a gift I have and Shonda has is like a once-in-a-generation storyteller and and our writers our skin of staff writers are incredible and They bring things so surprising and relevant and galvanizing every week and I just, you know, I sit like a gladiator and I just wait to see what's gonna happen. But that being said, Melly, you know, all her life has, that's been her dream.

It's just been her dream. Even in this finale episode, she was like, I don't know, so people always say, women dream about weddings. I dreamed about this, you know, it's always been her dream. And at some point during the campaign, it just seeped deep into my marrow. And all I wanted was for Melay to be president. And I think last summer, this was a bifurcated season.

We did five episodes in the summer. Carrie had to have a baby. And so we took some time off. And then we came back in January. And the world changed while we were away. And this season, what they had intended for this season got completely thrown in the garbage. And everything went a different way.

Sean has gone in record to saying, they thought this season was going to arc out with one of the bad guys, all of a sudden, speaking Russian and, ooh, the Russians hacked the election. But the Russians hacked the election. So you know, like they had to like trash it all. And I don't, I don't, I just don't think Melle was going to win. And so I think that's different. I just, John has not gone on record with that.

So that's speculative. But I can tell you, there was a scene in the finale with Melly just quietly sitting in her oval and it meant the world to me. Like I know I meant the world to Melly, but it also meant the world to me. And I never, I seldom allow myself to get that. I just seldom have a dog in the hunt, you know?

I honor what the story is, and I want to tell a story in the best way possible. But gosh, that moment felt good. What would she want? This is from Vicki Dumber. What would she want to focus on as president during her first 100 days? Oh, Vicki, good question.

And I don't know, and I don't even know that we're gonna come back and move forward in time. Like I don't take anything for granted on this job. So I wouldn't even know what to say. She's been very, you know, historically, Mellie's agenda has been very children and family and education and I think she would keep to that. But I don't know. I would never, I would never. and I think she would keep to that,

but I don't know. I would never, I would never. But what if you were president? Oh me? Yeah. Oh my goodness, well, arts and education would be big for me, and rights would be big for me. Maybe you don't, like,

I'd probably would be a terrible president because all my issues would be like, I just want everyone to feel loved and included. I do have three cats in a dog. Nice. We have three cats. Oh yeah. No dog. Oh, that's right. There's room for that. Oh, that's okay. That counts. Bloop more than a dog. Well, congratulations. Thank you, Ed. for Digest Booper. Well done. What's his name? His name is Alexander. He's now going through a phase where he won't let us wipe him.

So I have to give him a bath every time he. Oh, Dan, that's hard. What do you think is thinking is there? I think that he's his own man. Coffee. But I don't want to scare that out of him. Was that a phase you went through? I have not that particular phase.

He's also gone through a phase that apparently, I did not go through what I was a kid where he's incredibly flirtatious with women. Really? Just, if female walks in the room, he will drop me like a hot potato, he just loves women. And then if another woman walks in after the one he's flirting with right now,

he will drop that one. Wow! They cannot be their own little people, man. He's like the 93 year old who funded your education. Alexander's a player. Yes, yes. Wow. So your first 100 days would be Animal Rights, which I strongly support? Animal Rights, Arts and Education, LGBTQ.

Everything that's being, people right now in this administration are being not even slowly, but definitively disenfranchised. And if I, you know, the next 100 days were mine, it would be to build all that back. We were going in such a beautiful direction. I just never thought in my lifetime. And obviously I'm of a democratic bent. I naively assume progress was, you know, ever marching forward. And I didn't think I'd see us go backwards in my lifetime.

And it hurts me every day. Like, it makes my chest tight to even think about it. So that would be, you know, it would be of all about the people. Here's the final one from Bellamy Young Webb at Be Young Webb. Even though we have yet to experience it in America, how proud was she, you, to portray a character becoming the first female president? And thanks for asking. I, you know, it was really important to shan down all the people that I work with.

I think they really, America is behind the rest of the world in this regard. We just have not had our fair share of women leadership. And to work in a matriarchy as I do now, I know how different it can be and how wonderful. And it's also a fact that Mellie was also incredibly qualified candidate. So it happens to be that she's a woman. But if you take people on their merit,

she's also very much earned it. I loved in the season finale that they, she really went through a period where it just had to burn away all her frivolity. There's been a long, Dan doesn't watch, so I'll tell him. There's been a long thing about Mellie being ornamental, not functional, even though she has been behind

the scenes running a lot of that and has a mind that's expertly capable. And so, but she, you know, when you get told something all your life, you tend to take it on. And so this last and the season finale really burned that away. And it was a life and death situation situation whether or not she should have the inauguration because someone was trying to assassinate her. And I think she had to surrender that this dream that she had was no longer just hers. And that it as off holding public office should be that it was a service and that America needed to see this. And if she

had to give her life so that America could witness someone, a female someone being inaugurated, that that was a good enough reason to have been alive. And I hope she carries that courage and humility and nobility into her time, her tenure as president. What a fun guest you've been. Oh, Dan, it's really been great to be here with you. Thanks for telling me some tea on you've been. Oh, Dan, it's really been great to be here with you. Thanks for telling me some tea on you too.

I learned tea, by the way. Recently, when I, Rupal was a previous guest on this. Delicious. That guy is amazing. Amazing. He's an an avid meditator. Really interesting guy. That's when I learned the term tea from him.

And everybody, I'm going to make Dan sign his tag and I will tweet it. Okay. I actually that's fine. I would open book. We're just finally if people want to learn more about you where do they go? Oh my goodness. Well I mean I'm on Twitter at Bellamy Young and also Instagram the same and Facebook and they can get my album far away so close because my whole heart is in there. And you know, we've got a website just all the normal stuff. BellamyYoung.com. Yeah. Okay.

Cool. Thank you. Appreciate it. There's so much damn things for what you do. You've put a, you've found a beautiful way to inspire people to go on their own journey. So thanks for that. I got to watch scandal. Ha ha ha.

Okay, there's another edition of the 10% Happier Podcast. If you liked it, please make sure to subscribe, rate us, and if you want to suggest topics we should cover or guess we should bring in, hit me up on Twitter at Dan B. Harris. I also want to thank heartily to people who produced this podcast and really do pretty much all the work. Lauren, Efron, Josh Cohen, Sarah Amos, Andrew Calp, Steve Jones, and the head of ABC News

Digital Dance Silver. I'll talk to you next Wednesday. Hey, hey, prime members. You can listen to 10% happier early and ad-free on Amazon Music. Download the Amazon Music app today, or you can listen early and ad-free with Wondery Plus in Apple Podcasts. Before you go, do us a solid and tell us all about yourself

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