Ten Percent Happier with Dan Harris - A Meditation for When You’re Nursing a Grudge | Bonus Meditation with Oren Jay Sofer

Episode Date: December 1, 2023

Make peace with pettiness through good old understanding.About Oren Jay Sofer:Oren Jay Sofer teaches mindfulness, meditation and Nonviolent Communication. He has practiced meditation since 1997, beginning his studies in Bodh Gaya, India and is a long-time student of Joseph Goldstein, Michele McDonald, and Ajahn Sucitto, and is a graduate of the IMS/Spirit Rock Teacher Training program. Oren teaches retreats across the country and works as Senior Program Developer at Mindful Schools, teaching and developing curricula for one of the international leaders of mindfulness in education.To find this meditation in the Ten Percent Happier app, you can search for “Soothing Resentment’s Burn.” See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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Nursing a grudge. Our teacher, DuJour, is Orin J. Sofer, who was on the podcast just a few days ago talking about his new book, Orin is a graduate of the IMS spirit rock teacher training program He teaches retreats all over the country and works as a senior program developer at mindful schools Here we go now prying loose of our resentment with orange a sofa Hi, this is orin resentment burns Hi, this is Orin. Resentment burns when we feel hurt, something contracts inside or lashes out to protect

us. This doesn't actually help the situation. In fact, it can make things worse. It's like picking up a hot coal to throw it at someone else where the one who gets burned first. So let's meditate together with this. Find a position that feels comfortable. Notice the places where your body touches the ground and feel the steadiness there.

Take some time to just explore letting the out breath soothe you. If you like, you can even lengthen your exhalation just a little bit. Resenting another person or a situation can make us feel strong or powerful. But if we look closely, it also hurts. Take a look and see for yourself. Notice how resentment is a state of agitation of bitterness and how that in and of itself is uncomfortable. We can try to bring some care and compassion to ourselves. You might say to yourself silently, something simple like, I'm in pain, or this hurts. Give yourself space to step back and honor however you're feeling. If it feels strong, use your out breath to calm and soothe the sensations. intense, you can always take a break. We feel resentment for a reason. There's something important that matters to us here. Whatever the cause, understanding what matters to us can help things settle, and also offer some important clues for how to move forward. What do you value? That's at the core of this. Next, it can be helpful to consider what's a meaningful way forward.

What's needed right now? Go ahead and ask yourself this question, and then listen quietly to see what your own wisdom says. What's needed right now? Resentment is a really, really difficult emotion to be with. It takes a lot of strength, patience and willingness to meditate with resentment. Try acknowledging some of those good qualities in yourself right here and now, even just a little. Whenever you're ready, you can allow your eyes to open and look around the room. Thanks so much for your practice.

Be well. Thank you, Orrin. You can find more meditations like this one over on the 10% happier app. Just download the app wherever you get your apps to get started. We'll see you right back here on Monday for a brand new episode. If you like 10% happier, I hope you do. You can listen early and add free right now by joining Wondery Plus in the Wondery app or on Apple podcasts. Prime members can listen ad free on Amazon Music. Before you go,

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